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fetishfairytales2 · 4 months ago

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The Ex, Pt. 1 (Story)

Hey, my pervy ladies and pathetic losers! It's time to dish the details on the moment I introduced the new and improved Sissy Brandi to her ex-girlfriend, Rachel, just like I promised! Oh, the look on poor Rach’s face when she realized her macho ex-boyfriend had transformed into a diapered little sissy...priceless! Guess maybe someone should have warned her a little more, oopsie! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- It had been way too long since I reconnected with one of my other college BFF’s, Rachel. It had been a minute since we last talked, and let's just say Brandi played a big part in that. During a break back in school, this loser actually dated one of my friends! I should have known he was going to be all red flags, even back then. I didn’t blame her, I just figured whatever, I was still oblivious to how much of a loser Brandi would turn out to be, and I wanted him back at the time, ugh, stupid me! But when Brandon and I got back together, things between Rachel and me just didn't feel the same. We slowly drifted apart, only keeping in touch through occasional Instagram likes and birthday texts and that was it.

However, everything changed when Brandi was “born”. I just knew I had to introduce my adorable little girl to all the important women in her life. Brandi's sisters, Sarah and Grace, absolutely loved her new look, and I was excited to show off my handiwork to Rachel. I mean, we couldn't have anyone still thinking my little cucky was a real man, could we? It was time for a reunion and a big reveal!

I decided to take a chance and slide into Rachel's DMs on Instagram. I started off casual; "hey, girl, long time no talk!" We caught up on the usual boring adult stuff: work, relationships, the works. But then, it was time for the drama. I dropped a bomb: "Yeah, Brandon and I are still kind of dating. But guess what? He cheated!" I knew that would hook her. She immediately called, all worried and supportive, like we never stopped talking.

As she was trying to be calming and sweet, she asked how I was doing. She probably expected the typical breakup story. "I’m getting over him by getting under someone new," wasn't the response she was expecting. I went in on the whole thing, making sure to really talk about Brandon's flaws. Poor, poor me, abused, cheated on, and left alone. Sure, the loser messed up by cheating, but the rest was just a little creative storytelling. I wanted my former best friend, and Brandi’s ex-girlfriend, on my side, and it worked. "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed, eating up my bullshit. "What are you planning to do now?" she asked, so, so very sad for me!

"No, girl," I chuckled, "it's not about what I'm doing, it's about who." She was even more interested now; the little perv. I loved my friends. "Remember Conner?" I teased. We spent a minute talking about how cute Conner always was and how Brandon was always a douchebag to him. "Well, things have taken a twist," I said, smiling, "let's just say Brandon is a changed person. He's much sweeter now, almost unrecognizable even. It's like he's a whole new person! Sort of my little revenge for his cheating bullshit." I laughed. "Why don't you come over this weekend for a girl's night and some wine? You can meet the new Brandon... or should I say, Brandi?" I teased. This was going to be fun!

Three days later, I was buzzed and giddy, I practically skipped to the door when I heard the knock. It was showtime! Rachel was about to walk on something straight out of poor Brandi’s wildest nightmares. I'd spent the evening getting cute and downing wine, so excited for when I could show Rachel what I had done to the “man” she knew. Before I opened the door, I smiled at how fucked Brandi really was. In the center of the living room, was my hunky real man, Conner, naked and looking delicious. And bent over in front of him, my sweet sissy Brandi was on display. The poor thing was dressed to impress—or should I say, dressed to embarrass? My little princess looked absolutely perfect.

Bandi’s little schoolgirl outfit was perfect - she looked like a total sissy whore.. Her so short, and so cute plaid skirt was hiked way up, showing off her tight sissy booty. I made sure to tie up her white crop top to really go with the look, but Conner had almost ripped it totally off her already! He just couldn't keep his hands to himself. She looked so slutty in her sky-high platform Mary Jane heels too. Bent over like that, it was like those sissy legs went on forever! I was almost jealous!. Her hair was done up in pigtails with pink ribbons, matching her glossy red lips and rosy cheeks. But the best part? Of course, it was the penis pacifier gagging her, muffling her stupid little whimpers as Conner pounded her from behind!

"Hey, girl!" I called out, pulling Rachel into a hug as I guided her inside, purposely keeping her away from the living room. I wasn’t giving away the surprise yet! “Should we have some wi…” Rachel looked shocked as she heard a faint scream. "Mmm, someone's definitely having fun," I winked, pointing toward the muffled moans coming from the next room.

Poor Rach didn’t know what to think. "Take it, you sissy slut!" Conner's voice boomed from the living room, followed by the sound of his hips slamming against Brandi's. "Fuck yourself on my cock, bitch!" he growled, his hands probably digging into Brandi's hips. God, he always knew how to fuck like a machine. Brandi sure was a lucky little whore right now! I could picture Conner spanking her little sissy's ass, leaving it red and sore.

"Conner's really giving it to her," I smiled like this was no big deal, pouring us both some wine. "He just loves to grab those sissy hips and force Brandi to take every inch of his, well...” I paused and cupped my hand over my mouth; “his really, really massive cock! And listen to her, sobbing like the little bitch she is." I smirked, taking a sip of my drink.

Conner grew more demanding; "stop your fucking crying, slut! Take it like a good little sissy and thank Daddy!!" The sound of his hand connecting with Brandi's ass again echoed through the house. "That's it, scream for me, princess. Let Mommy hear how much you love getting fucked like the sissy you are!"

Rachel's eyes bulged as she listened. I led her to the living room so she could see for herself; our ex-boyfriend turned into my sissy plaything, getting plowed by my new man. I couldn't not laugh at the shock on Rachel’s face. Steering her by the shoulders, I guided her closer to the action.

"Rach, allow me to introduce you to Brandi!" I giggled, pointing toward the sobbing figure of Brandon, now just a whimpering mess. "Look at my little sissy, taking it like a cheap little whore. Isn't she adorable?"

Conner showed no signs of slowing down, driving his cock into Brandi's ass over and over. Rachel couldn’t find words, which made the whole thing even funnier for me. Poor thing. "Conner?! Brandon?! How—?" she stammered, her eyes darting between the two of them.

I placed my hand on her shoulder gently and led her back into the kitchen. "Surprise!” I laughed, handing Rachael her wine. “I told you I changed Brandi into something much more fitting. She will never hurt another woman again. That’s what happens to cheaters."

"What the actual fuck, Heather? How did you even do all of this?" Rachel asked, downing all her wine in one go. I explained to her how I caught Brandi cheating, about the videos of her sucking Conner's dick that I recorded, the photos of her dressed in diapers that I took, the nursery filled with dildos, and the cuckysitters I hired to keep an eye on her.

"Holy shit," Rachel finally said, shaking her head in disbelief. "A whole year?! He... or should I say, she, has been living like this for an entire year?"

Conner, who had just finished emptying another load into Brandi, joined us in the kitchen. "Mmmph," he grunted, wrapping his arms around my waist. "She's been mine for at least that long. That fucking loser has been living in diapers the whole time.”

I laughed, sharing the details of Brandi's miserable life. "And let's not forget, she has to call Conner 'Daddy.' I'd guess she sucks his dick at least five times a day, and that's on top of the cum-only diet she's on. Most of the time, she's swallowing loads from his used condoms after he fucks me!" I giggled. Rachael was stunned into silence, which isn’t easy for that girl! “Want to go meet her?” I asked excitedly.

Shh, shh, cupcake," I cooed, walking into the room to find Brandi in the fetal position in the floor., I leaned down, gently stroking Brandi's hair as she lay there, a sobbing mess with her skirt still hiked up and cum leaking out of her poor, stretched asshole. Her shirt was nowhere to be seen, probably ripped off by Conner. He can be a really dominant Daddy when he needs to!

"It's okay, Brandi-girl," I reassured her, channeling my inner Mommy. "I’m right here to make everything better... or worse, depending on my mood." I winked at Rachel, who was just staring at me shocked, and delivered a stinging slap to both of the crying sissy’s ass cheeks. “Wow,” I giggled, tracing the bright red handprints I’d left. "At least both cheeks match!"

"Aww, what's wrong, Brandi? Did Daddy already make your bottom hurt? Well, too fucking bad, 'cause Mommy wants to have fun too!” I noticed Rachel's eyes widen when she spotted the massive plastic cock pacifier on the floor next to the shaking sissy. "That bad boy is only, like, half the size of Conner," I pointed out, raising my eyebrows and winking. "We gotta keep Brandi's sissy holes filled, but not too filled, right?" I paused, biting my lip. "Wouldn't want her to get too comfortable sucking Conner’s cock."

Rachel's hand shook as she held up the pacifier, her eyes wide with surprise. "It... goes in her mouth?" She asked, her voice laced with curiosity as she glanced between me and Brandi, who was a sobbing mess on the floor. I leaned in close to Rachel, whispering something that made her bite her lip nervously, but shrugged; “he was a cheating prick…”

Now she was into it! I knelt down next to Brandi, who was too exhausted from crying to put up much of a fight. I gently pinched her nose shut, watching as her eyes widened and her mouth opened slightly. "Are you sure?" Rachel questioned as she leaned in closer, I simply nodded, holding my grip on Brandi’s nose. “He was texting you while he was dating me, huh?” She asked, clearly pissed up now.

"Here comes the airplaaaane!" Rachel attempted a baby voice, It was adorable how she was getting into this now. “Open up you cheating little sissy fuck!” Brandi, on the other hand, was having none of it. She thrashed and squirmed, her eyes wild with panic. I reached under her skirt and gave her sissy marbles a firm squeeze, causing her to yelp and open her mouth wider. “You deserve it you douche!” Racheal yelled, jamming the cock into the back of Brandi’s throat and slapping her across the face. “I can’t believe you!”

I gently pushed the pacifier into her mouth, the huge plastic cock stretching her lips. "Thatagirl Sissy! You know you love your paci! It’s nice to have something other than Daddy’s cock in your mouth, huh?" Brandi and I both looked over at Rachael, surprised when she laughed. Even she was giggling at the little shithead now! "There, isn't that better, princess?" I asked, giving Brandi’s cotton balls one more squeeze, smiling down at her sweetly,

Brandi whimpered, her eyes pleading with me to stop. Before I can say anything else, Rachel noticed the tiny pink chastity cage on Brandi's cock. “Is that his…her dick?” She asked, pointing. “That’s her sissy clitty,” I giggled, bouncing her chastity cage up and down in my hand. "This little cage," I said, holding it, "makes sure Brandi doesn't get naughty. She's locked up tight, no squirties allowed."

I traced my nail through the bars of the little plastic pink cage slowly, just to tease the little cucky as much as I could; “Brandi's little clitty key is my favorite accessory, and not just because it looks cute around my neck,” I laughed, holding up the key. “It's a constant reminder that I own her and her teeny-tiny sissy stick. One tug on this little plastic prison, and she squirms like the little worm she is.” I giggled as Brandi struggled against me, trying to fight off the stiffie I was giving her; “She can’t help herself. She doesn’t want to, but it feels so good, doesn’t it, little girl? She knows I decide when she's free, and that's if I feel like it at all! Isn't that right, my pretty princess?"

Yanking on Brandi’s pigtails, I smiled listeningto Brandi moaning and whining behind her gag. "Aww, does my widdle baby want something? Is it diapee time? I think you're right, my precious sissy. We can't have you leaking Daddy's cum everywhere, now can we? That would be such a mess!"

I turned to Rachel, casually asking, "You don't mind if we take a quick break to change her, do you? It'll only take a second. Conner, honey, could you come and lend a hand? I am always such a sweetheart to my little girl of course, but Brandi might need some extra persuasion."

Rachel's eyes widened, and she hesitated for a moment before replying, "Umm, no, of course not. I mean, it's a bit... weird, but I do kinda want to see it…a little bit.”

Conner strolled into the room, his arms folded across his hulky chest and he leaned against the wall, rolling his eyes. “Why can’t this freak ever just not be a fucking weirdo?” he grumbled. He enjoyed seeing Brandi humiliated, but didn’t love it when I involved him. Whatever, if he wanted to fuck me, he had to fuck the sissy too!

I made an excited face at Brandi and put on my best mommy voice;. "Okay, baby girl, let's get you all nice and pampered. No more leaks, okay? Mommy's here to take care of you." I pulled my sissy onto the couch. “Legs up girlie!” I cooed, pulling her legs high into the air.

As I reached for the diaper bag, Rachel surprised me by joining in on her ex-boyfriend’s humiliation, practicing her own baby talk! "Aww, good girl! let's get that diapee on you!” She kneeled down next to me and winked, continuing to humiliate Brandi. “No more leakies for our little baby girl, okay? We'll have you snug as a bug in no time!" But just as we were about to get started, Brandi decided to put up a pathetic struggle. She writhed and kicked, trying to break free from our grasp!

"Now, now, Brandi," I chided, "that's not very ladylike. Be a good girl and lie still. You know you can't escape!" I laid the pink Pamper underneath of my little sissy, but she almost kicked me in the head! “Hey!” I yelled, her squirming and kicking were getting a bit out of hand, so I decided to take charge. "Alright, that's enough, princess. Time to get that diapee on. Be a good girl for Mommy!."

I pinned her arms above her head, staring daggers at her. "Now, be a good girl and relax. This will all be over soon…if you’re a good girl" But Brandi wasn't having any of it. She bucked her hips, trying to throw me off again. "Oh, come on, Brandi, don't be difficult. You know you’re not going anywhere.” The sweet darling huffed and puffed behind her pacifier, shaking her head.

Rachel, joining in the fun now, tried to hold Brandi’s legs up with me; "yeah, Brandi, stop squirming! We're just trying to keep you diapered and cute. It's for your own good!"

Now Rachael was holding her legs up and I was trying to pin her down on the couch and she was still freaking out. But I wasn't about to let her win, hell no! I grabbed the diaper and held it open, teasingly tapping her nose with it. "Come on, Brandi, time to cooperate. Lift that cute little bottom for Mommy. Don't make me call Daddy Conner over here. You know you don't want that, right?"

To Be Continued...

Note from Heather: I hope everyone enjoyed meeting Rachael so far, she definitely returns in some of Brandi's other misadventures!

#humili sissi

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somefanficrecomendations · 10 months ago

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January Monthly Roundup

BATFAMILY

Three’s a Crowd (But I’m Here if You Are) by JUBE514 (Bernard Dowd/Tim Drake/Conner Kent) 20k, Identity Reveal, Fluff Bernard pops the top off his water bottle, a roll of his wrist at the perfect angle and it comes right off, and pops the faucet in Tim’s very nice kitchen to cold. Tim presses a kiss to the back of Bernard’s neck before Tim moves to the fridge to get his own water. Bernard used to not drink as much water, but Tim drinks enough water for three people a day so Bernard naturally has followed- and now Bernard has no acne so he’s sort of mad about it actually. “The main character has two hands.” Bernard chimes easy and teasing. “Polygamy is the awnser here babe.” Tim peaks over the door of the fridge. “Oh? Is this you telling me something?” — Tim Drake, Bernard Dowd, and Kon-El have two hands each. They use them to hold onto each other.

My Evil Twin From Another Universe by FabulaRasa (Hal Jordan/Bruce Wayne) 22k An interdimensional anomaly strands another version of Hal in this universe, and two Hal Jordans in one universe is several Hal Jordans too many.

this week in heroblr by UnidentifiedFroggy (multi) 22k, WIP, Social Media, okay im sorry y'all did SUPERBOY just say he's a tumblrina??? #SUPERBOY AS IN KON EL AS IN SUPERMANS CLONE #DIED IN THE CRISIS SUPERBOY #holy shit #superblr #heroblr - a viewpoint into tumblr as it might exist within my own exceedingly self-indulgent form of the dc universe, told through epistolary fashion in batfamily social media fic tradition. features heroes getting cancelled, takes of middling veracity, plenty of queerness both on heroblr and in the hero community, my self-indulgent ships, and something vaguely resembling plot and lore told obliquely through tumblr drama and outsider pov interpretations of superheroes

The Big Boss by Crowlows19 (gen) 4k, POV Outsider The story of Bruce Wayne and his family as told by his insane Wayne Enterprises calendar and the poor assistant that had to manage it all.

Batman for Dummies by Havendance (gen) 38k, No Man’s Land, Helena Bertinelli-centric In the aftermath of the quake that shook Gotham, Helena Bertinelli takes on the mantle of the Bat. (It isn’t like Batman’s using it.) If she’d known the cowl came with a certain moralizing little bird following her around — well, she probably still would’ve done it, but it would’ve been nice to know in advance. (Or: Tim and Helena team up 2: electric boogaloo. Now with more bats!)

Older Sibling Duty by Icestorm238 (gen) 2k, Batfam Names are important. The Bats tend to bypass their real names, however, in favour of increasingly dumb nicknames. The older sibling trio of Dick, Jason, and Cass are the primary instigators of this. After all, it is their duty.

AITAH For Tricking My Brother Into Drugging My Other Brother? by TaxiCabToSlowtown (gen) 1k, Social Media, Am I the Asshole? Okay, look, I know how that sounds, but hear me out. My (M, 19, "Fred") little brother (17, I’ll call him “Percy”) has problems. These problems stem a lot from the fact that his parents abandoned him for long periods of time as a kid and he didn’t have a proper upbringing. I should mention that Percy’s parents then are not the same as our parent(s) now. We’re both adopted, and I’m messed up too, I’ll admit it. Our Father (45, I’ll call him “Arthur”) had sort of turned his house into a home for kids with really traumatic families.

Welcome to the Family by ViiA01 (Hal Jordan/Bruce Wayne) 67k, WIP, Batfam Bruce’s children want to meet the man that their father deemed worthy of a smile. So they do, in the only way they know how. By breaking into people's houses and lurking in dark places. Bruce just wants his children to stop stalking Earth’s Green Lantern, if only because they're ruining his plans. And Hal? Well, Hal is convinced that Bruce has concocted a plot to get around his ‘no killing’ rule, by having his children stalk him until his heart gives out from the stress.

A Series of Unfortunately Timed Coming Out's by Queerbutstillhere (multi), 7k, Coming Out The batfamily had this gift. This wonderful skill. They are such talented, brilliant, capable individuals. But they are absolutely horrendous at wisely timing coming out to their family members. These are their stories . Aka: "I love you all but could we stop coming out to each other during the middle of battles?"

Call to a Lonely Earth by Drag0nst0rm (gen), 7k, Angst, AU-17776 Fusion There are no children left in Gotham. Not until the multiverse spits one out right in front of Batman, at least.

buy the ticket, take the ride by Anonymous (gen), 13k, Vegas Tim had always figured that if he ever woke up in Vegas sans-memory, it would be when he was older than fourteen. But there were some things he couldn’t control, and apparently whatever had happened last night that he didn’t remember was one of them.

CROSSOVER

Keystone by Kalinjdra (gen), 26k, WIP, HPxDC Harry Potter double-checked his lists before sending off the letter to an unknown cousin. He hoped for maybe some money at least, he didn't expect to get a scary bodyguard brother instead. Jason Todd has never stopped searching for his real parents so when Tim offers solid information in exchange of taking care of some kid, he really doesn't have anything else to do but take it. No one really could have foretold what followed.

#batfam fic rec #Batman #fanfiction #batlantern #Tim Drake #Jason Todd #conner kent #kon-el #batfamily #damian wayne #harry potter fic rec #monthly roundup #complete #fic rec #wip

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onlyoneofyongsoo · 9 months ago

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Why BUB actually fits into OOO's catalogue

Bump Up Business has been criticised for many things, and don’t get me wrong, it’s far from perfect, but there is one question I have heard a lot: “Why did OnlyOneOf of all people choose to do this? Doesn’t this show play exactly into the thing we have been defending them of?”

My own answer to this is yes and no. But let me explain.

In this I will not be discussing what the writers had in mind, because I don’t know them. But I’ll talk about why I think it makes sense OnlyOneOf would tell this kind of story, whether they actually had any say in choosing this drama or not.

The main argument for most peoples' criticism I’ve seen is “This show is about/glorifying queerbaiting.” But is it really? Both of the characters are already queer. Jihoon has dated at least one man and is very aware of his own sexuality. Eden is quickly established as being very insecure in his own sexuality, not because he’s straight, but because he’s queer and finds that hard to accept. So the show is about queer characters.

Okay, so how does the queerbaiting fall into this? Obviously there is queerbaiting present. Their company practically forces them to do it. Eden is very reluctant, but agrees after the company gives him an ultimatum. Jihoon is less reluctant, but also in a tight spot. He has fallen off and this is seemingly his last chance to save his career, something he wouldn’t give up even for the man he loved. So the characters take no pleasure in the queerbaiting, but is it a problem to them? Yes, actually. It is made clear that they have trouble telling apart what is real feelings and what’s just work. In episode 4 for example Jihoon asks Eden if he is struggling with their concept after Eden revealed how insecure he is in his sexuality. The question comes from a place of caring and honesty. Eden then answers that he is okay because it’s "just work". Since emotions and their hidden identities are now part of their work it gets all muddled and confusing for them.

You might say now “But that’s not the problem with queerbaiting! They’re leading their fans on!” And from a fan’s perspective I agree. They are leading them on. But this isn’t about fans, this show is about idols. What would it be like for a queer idol to work in an industry where you are urged to act queer but to never be queer? How would that affect your personal life?

In the drama the queer characters hide their identity. Even after Hyunbin spread these awful rumours about Jihoon, they don’t reveal their relationship. Evidently having rumours about being with women is still better than revealing that you’re gay. The entire time they keep any real relationships under wraps.

On top of that, in a way Eden has to out himself for his job. Even though he of course isn’t allowed to be actually queer, acting this lovey-dovey with another man in public sure must feel like he’s coming out and he is clearly uncomfortable with that. Interviewers and netizens are constantly questioning their relationship as well. Are they gay? Are they straight? Do they naturally act that way? Is the company forcing them? Having all your actions be scrutinised and dissected like this, especially as a closeted queer person is terrifying.

Once again I’m not claiming that the writers wanted to represent queer idols’ struggles, but I think you can understand how this might be able to be read that way, especially by idols themselves.

Now how does this fit in with OnlyOneOf’s usual work, besides the obvious queer element? For that I’d like to remind you of June 2022. That is the month we started off the undergrOund idOl project. If you’re like me, then that name probably made you question it. What does it mean? I remember theories about it being about struggling as a relatively unknown group and things along those lines. Luckily they gave us hints in several articles by letting us know that the series is about “the inner side of idols who shine on stage”. Okay, cool! So is it about struggles with fame? Like a glimpse behind the mask? Let’s look at the videos! Hm… Not much about idol life here actually… They’re all just.. queer? How curious. Almost as if they want to highlight the queerness so many idols or celebrities have to hide?

So OnlyOneOf, a group whose behaviours and sexualities are constantly being dissected and who is famous for telling and highlighting genuine queer stories, even connecting those stories to what idols have to hide, choose a drama that is about queer idols who have to navigate their queerness in an industry that demands “fake queerness” but has no room for real queer people. This doesn’t actually seem that surprising to me. Does it to you?

Last comments:

I don’t think that BUB is a critical masterpiece tastefully portraying the harsh reality of queer celebrities. I think that the producers and writers did not do a good job and that OnlyOneOf’s own work is a lot better. But I can absolutely see how this story fits into the larger picture and why this could be appealing to them. I don’t know if they even had any say in doing the drama to begin with. But I just wanted to provide a different point of view. Maybe someone found this interesting at least <3

#onlyoneof #bump up business

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lady-october · 5 months ago

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Pairing : Oli Sykes x Female Assistant Genre : Romance, Smut (18+ Only) Previous Chapters : Available on Ao3

Story Content : Smut, Drama, Choking, Power dynamics, Romance, Rough sex, Sadism/Masochism, Dom/Sub, Mentions of addiction & self harm, Degradation, Praise kink, Exhibitionism, Orgasm denial, Breath play, Dirty talk.

Summary :

“Don’t you see what a dangerous game you’re playing? Why did you have to look so fucking delicious tonight, I couldn’t stop undressing you in my mind, thinking of all the twisted things I want to do to you.” She had only worked on the touring team for three weeks, but her mind had been hijacked by dirty thoughts of a man she barely even talked to. Sure, he was very attractive, but were there other reasons she was so uncontrollably drawn to him? This is a filthy story of pain, self discovery, and love.

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Chapter 24: It's not the end of the world

Chapter title is lyrics from "Dear Diary"

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I watched Oli through the crowd from across the room.

He was sitting on the same luxurious sofa as before, tucked into a dark corner of the VIP lounge, still completely enthralled by his phone.

After leaving Mat I had begun making my way over to Oli, to finally talk to him, but as soon as I spotted him across the room my feet were suddenly glued to the floor. Instead of making my presence known, I had opted for positioning myself as far away from him as possible while still conveniently keeping him in my line of sight.

I had been so wrapped up in my own realisations regarding my attraction to Mat, and the fact that I needed to turn him down, that I completely overlooked Oli’s potential reaction to the news.

Would he consider this a sign of commitment, suddenly expecting more from me?

Surely not.

He knows my struggles run a lot deeper than simply ‘picking one of them’.

Right?

Would he feel like I didn’t spend enough time with Mat, and therefore be suspicious of us in the future if Oli and I were to actually end up together?

Was I also worried I’d be drawn to Mat going forward?

While I attempted to push the intrusive thought aside, my mind had other ideas.

“Do you like it a bit rough, love?”

Mat’s words echoed in my head, making me all-too aware of my ruined underwear; my gnawing, unbearable desperation.

Staring at Oli didn’t help.

He was dressed in all black, probably to blend in while in a more public setting.

But he never blended in.

Much like last night during our date, he’d put on another button up after the show. But unlike the plain one from yesterday, this one was distressed and covered in faint occult symbols. The collar that had been buttoned when we arrived at the club was undone, along with his sleeves rolled up to reveal the intricate artwork of his arms.

I also noticed that his previously neat hair was now tousled, as if he'd anxiously ran his fingers through it a number of times.

Oli tucked his phone back into the trousers that were distractingly tight in the right places, and reached for the glass in front of him, downing it’s content. After replacing the glass on the table he simply stared out into space, his large eyes brimming with sadness as the lights in the club painted him in colourful washes, shifting between blues and purples.

Regardless of how turned on I was, how badly I wanted to just take solace in him, my heart ached so badly at the sight before me.

Whatever stopped me from approaching him moments ago was promptly overridden by my emotions, making me spring into motion.

His sad eyes grew dark as he spotted me walking towards him, sitting up a bit straighter; It was as if I could see the emotional wall being built brick by brick with every step I took in his direction.

“Hiya, love!” He yelled over the music when I got close enough, a fake smile appearing on his lips, revealing hints of the sadness that was so prominent on him when he didn’t know I was looking.

“Hi, where are the others?”

His head tilted sideways as he looked up at me, “Haven’t a clue, somewhere around here probably.”

While he seemed tipsy, he definitely wasn’t drunk. Which, for better or for worse, meant I could attempt a conversation with him.

“Can I sit with you?” I asked, suddenly feeling oddly awkward.

“Of course.”

There was a shift in his demeanour, a playfulness making an appearance as he offered me his hand.

I stared at his open palm, but he just nudged it closer to me.

On the surface the action was so similar to the one from the van this morning, when he eased me away from a panic attack, but I could tell he had very different intentions tonight.

Intentions that were far too tempting to ignore.

I tried to talk myself out of it, reminding myself why I was here, but it was a losing war.

After a quick glance around to check if someone we knew could see us, I indulged myself and slipped my fingers into his palm, feeling like a naughty child swiping cookies from the jar before dinner.

And as expected, he proceeded to immediately pull me down into his lap.

I landed on him with an exhale, my legs between his, his fingers casually coming to rest on the softness of my hips. Adrenaline surged me as I looked into his sparkling, mischievous eyes – currently bright purple from the ambient lighting around us.

I could tell Oli was waiting for my reaction to his bold move, watching to see what I would do next; would I accept my intimate seating arrangement despite who might see us? Or would I chicken out, and dismiss my public position on his thigh.

But the truth is I didn’t want to move.

I understood that he was playing with me, pushing me out of my comfort zone, yet I found it hard to care. This just felt too good, too right, my body fitting so perfectly against his.

For a split second I considered ignoring all the things we needed to discuss, just shoving them under the rug and pretending everything was alright so we could have some fun.

But I knew that wasn’t a real option tonight.

When I didn’t move, his smile grew, pulling me closer against him, draping my arm behind his neck in the process. I didn’t fight it, instead I placed my other hand on his chest, savouring the feel of his solid body.

But just because I’d let myself enjoy him, didn’t mean I’d given up on my original mission.

“How are you?”

I was so nervous about attempting to break through to him, to tear down the facade he’d put up, that my question was barely audible over the loud music, even to myself.

But I could tell he’d heard me from the uncomfortable shift on his features, before he broke eye contact to nestle his face into my neck, placing a handful of slow, painfully delicate kisses there, his hand trailing further up my back in the process, pressing me against him.

A shiver of lust ran up my spine, following his touch, as I fought off the instinct to look around once again for anyone we knew. Because while I was infinitely more comfortable with the idea of someone catching us like this after everything that had happened the last couple of days, I still very much didn’t want Mat – who I rejected mere minutes ago – to see us.

“Not bad, yourself?” He breathed, lied, onto my skin between kisses that grew more indulgent the longer they went on.

My eyebrows knotted into a frown as I tried to stay on topic, despite how hard he was trying to derail my thoughts.

“Thought we said no lies.” I basically panted as his hair pushed against my cheek, tickling me, his now open mouth travelling further up my neck.

“No, that was your end of the bargain. Mine was to not ignore you.” His words vibrated under my hand on his chest as he spoke them, the puffs of warm air against my wet skin only intensifying the electricity running up and down my spine – not to mention ruining my underwear further.

I felt myself fighting the urge to squirm against him as he suddenly let his teeth sink softly into the sensitive skin under his lips.

He was very clearly determined to avoid the conversation.

But I was not ready to give up yet.

“Please don’t lie to me.” I begged desperately, stifling a moan, hoping simultaneously that he would cooperate and talk to me, but also wishing we could just remain blissfully ignorant and continue what we are doing, regardless of who might see us.

Both relief and disappointment washed over me as he pulled away.

“I’ve been better.” He said, and for a moment you could tell he’d let himself be honest, but the pretence came back as quickly as it had dropped. Now there was a bitterness in his voice, “How was your time with Mat?”

While I knew that he wasn’t the only one avoiding certain topics, annoyance at his question still hit me swiftly and severely, “You’ve tried so hard to convince me to spend time with Mat, yet when I do–”

“I act like a fucking prick?”

Thrown off by his self aware interruption, I paused, staring into his intense yet cold eyes.

“I mean, yeah.” I agreed.

“You know my reasons, doesn’t mean I’m happy about it.”

His free hand made an appearance on my knee, slowly caressing its way onto me with intent, warm fingers grazing the skin of my inner thigh in the process. I was so painfully desperate already that the touch made my own hands on him balls into fists, bunching the fabric of his shirt beneath them.

His eyelids grew heavy as he watched me fight to stay in control, to not outwardly show how turned on I was.

Everything was so clearly a game to him tonight, and I was his opponent. So I tried to stay in fighting mode.

“Can we talk about the things you said before the show?” Yet another meek question, asked too quietly, too shyly. But at least I was trying.

Sadly he was having none of it.

He once again busied himself with my neck, resuming his intoxicating activities there, kissing with the same gentleness, the same eagerness that nearly had me whimpering the first time, “Tell me what you did with Mat first.” He responded casually between kisses as his hand trailed higher on my inner thigh, stroking slowly, teasingly, with enough pressure to shift my leg closer to his crotch, spreading my legs slightly in the process.

Involuntarily, I began squirming against him, my body as powerless as ever to his carnal magics.

Out of sheer frustration with the situation, my mind thankfully remained unclouded enough to speak, “You’ve made it very clear you don’t want to know what we’re up to.”

Once again he pulled away, this time to glare at me, the fingers that had made it more than halfway up my thigh digging into me, holding onto me as I tensed under his grip.

“You’re right, I really don’t, but I saw the look on your face when you came over here – can see it on you a mile away.” More electricity spread through me as he leaned in to press his lips against my ear – an eerily gentle gesture considering the sudden rage bubbling to the surface – in order to whisper his next words, “I know you’re soaking, love.” He continued, speaking leisurely, his fingers caressing closer to my core as he breathed his words into my ear, causing me to gasp, “So, tell me, if I let my hand travel a little bit higher, will you be wet for me…” In one jarring motion he ripped his lips away from me to resume his intense stare into my surprised eyes, the hand on my thigh now suddenly holding my chin with a sense of urgent, contained rage, “...Or for him? Cause it makes a massive fucking difference to me.”

His voice had come low and angry, and my only thought was that he had no right to be – no right to expect me to explore my attraction to Mat, yet be angry when I do.

As I opened my mouth to argue with him, I saw Mat and Lee in the corner of my eye, walking in our direction.

Instinct took over and I began pushing off of Oli, not wanting to rub the rejection in Mat’s face.

But Oli had other ideas.

“Nuh uh uh, you stay right here, love.” He said as the arm around me held me against him, stopping any attempts of me getting up. I wasn’t sure if he even knew Mat was nearby, or if he was so determined to get a response out of me that he didn’t care either way.

Panic set in as I watched Mat take a seat in our line of sight.

“I turned him down.” I blurted out.

All signs of anger immediately vanished from Oli, only sadness and shock remained as his large eyes.

“Why?” He asked, confused.

I continued my attempts at getting out of his lap before Mat spotted us, but his grip on me remained firm.

“Let me go.” I demanded through clenched teeth.

”Sure, sorry.” He said distantly as he finally released me, “Thought we agreed you’d keep seeing him.”

Patting the skirt of my dress down to make sure I was still adequately covered after Oli’s hands had wandered on me, I took a seat next to him, feeling rather annoyed, “Then why are you acting like this?”

Oli’s eyes darted between me and Mat, before coming to rest on my face.

He looked utterly distraught.

“Fuck.” He muttered before shooting out of his seat, taking long and swift strides towards the back entrance of the club, leading to the parking lot.

It only took me a split second to start following him, but Oli was taller, faster, and managed to cover a lot more ground than me with ease, even though both of us had to weave through the same amount of people.

Once we got to the long corridor that led to the exit I was already out of breath, but this stretch of our path was thankfully void of people for the time being, making it easier to catch up to Oli.

“Oli, wait!” I yelled, but he didn’t stop.

“Leave me the fuck alone, Alice.” He responded without skipping a beat, without bothering to look behind him.

Despite my exhausted state I made a run for it, and right as he was about to reach for the door handle I squeezed in front of him, leaning myself against the heavy door.

“I can’t win can I? You were gonna be upset either way, whether I kept seeing him or not.” I said between heaving breaths.

There was murder in his stare as he looked down at me through his hair.

“Move.” He growled, avoiding what I said entirely.

But I stood my ground.

“No.” I bit out, “You’re not allowed to avoid me, remember?”

I could tell he considered simply opening the door anyway, pushing past me and continuing his escape. But instead his hand slammed into the door next to my head, leaning over me as fury radiated off of him, as if to say; fine, I’ll stay, but you won’t be happy about it.

“Why did you turn him down?” He demanded.

I swallowed, realising I’d made my own bed and it was time to lay in it. So I said my realisation as truthfully, yet vaguely, as I could bring myself to, “I realised I w-was using him.”

A sense of disgust twisted his face, “The same way you’re using me?”

While I shouldn’t have been surprised at his deduction from my oversimplified statement, I was still thrown off by his question. Mainly because my reasons for not wanting to continue anything with Mat, very much meant that I had no intention of using either of them going forward.

“I’m not using you,” I started, causing his disgust to shift into disbelief and pure frustration. I was certain he was about to give up and bolt out of here, so I quickly continued voicing my thoughts out loud, “That might have been how it started, but that’s not where we are, and I think you know that too.”

His jaw clenched in anger, “And what happens if we stop having sex?” Darkness fell over his eyes as he leaned in closer, “You tellin’ me you won't go running off to Mat, to see if he can make it hurt as good as I can?”

The question was asked with a mocking purr, both sensual and aggressive in nature.

It was no secret how much I treasured the sex Oli offered me, how much it did for me – in so many different ways. But since feelings had developed on both sides, the priorities had shifted. So while I was attracted to Mat, while he might be able to offer me the things I craved, I can now see with clarity how that would burn all bridges with Oli – regardless of what Oli might claim.

And while I was horrified at the thought of committing to Oli, I had grown equally horrified at the thought of committing to not being with Oli. Leaving me in an incredibly uncomfortable, torturous, limbo.

“I, I w-wouldn’t do that, no.” I hadn’t meant to stutter, to sound so unsure of myself, but it was harder than anticipated to vocalise my rejection of Mat considering all the different things it meant.

Things that were hard to face.

He huffed out a breath, “Very convincing, love.”

It was my turn to be frustrated, “No lies, remember? And I told you I need time – regardless of if we have sex or not, I’m struggling with so many things and I’m doing the best I can to sort my head out, but all you’re doing is rushing me!”

“I love you.” He very simply stated, eyes swimming with sadness before he laughed a defeated laugh, “How’s that for rushing?” He asked with a sombre smile, his body deflating as he shook his head.

Somewhere in the back of my head I already knew that his feelings for me ran a lot deeper than the words we’d been using to label it, yet stunned wasn’t a severe enough descriptor for how I felt at his proclamation. I’d gone from rambling my frustrations to barely being able to form a single coherent thought, numbness claiming my limbs.

His hand fell away from the door, and while he stood up straighter, he somehow managed to appear more slouched over than when he was actually leaning over me.

“I’m shit at all this, taking things slow is a load of bollocks,” he said with a dismissive hand gesture, “and I don’t care about how saying it for the first time is suppose to be all romantic, or any of that nonsense really – I want to say it every time I look at you; I love you,”

His fingers had reached out to tenderly stroke my jaw, making me realise my mouth had fallen open, “and it’s maddening, making me act like a proper lunatic – you wanna know why?”

I could tell all the emotional walls had been obliterated from the vulnerable look in his eyes, the pain so prominent in them, so vast, that it hurt to breathe from the ache it elicited in my own chest.

I nodded in response, wanting to hear what he had to say.

“Cause I don’t fucking trust you, Alice.”

We both simply stared at each other for a beat, the music still thumping away in the background as if we weren’t falling apart on the inside.

“Having me date Mat won't fix that.” I finally responded, understanding that his issues can’t be solved by any of his little tests.

That maybe they can’t be solved at all.

Or at the very least not from anything I could do.

He was so close to tears I couldn’t tell if the laugh he released was the beginning stages of sobbing or not, “You’re right, probably not.”

Inhaling sharply, he looked towards the ceiling to gather himself.

When his eyes met mine again, they were colder, tenser.

“Maybe we’re just not right for each other.” He said flatly, before turning on his heels to walk back into the club.

Leaving me to lean against the door of the exit, to collect the pieces of my freshly shattered heart, alone.

... Subscribe to the story on Ao3 for future updates

#oli sykes x reader #oli sykes #oliver sykes #oli sykes fic #oli sykes fan fiction #oli sykes smut #bring me the horizon #bmth #smut #you got a taste now #So I am once again sorry for my decisions

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atlasshrugd · 7 months ago

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My thoughts on Bridgerton Season 3 Part 1 (Spoilers)

Hi guys! I have reached astounding levels of brainrot over this season (having rewatched Polin scenes until I am blue in the face) so here I am going to air my thoughts out in probably an incoherent manner. Thank you!

Off the bat:

. Amazing, stunning, beautiful chemistry. Nicola and Luke are really the fucking MVPs. Their chemistry is undeniable to the point where I NEED MORE. It kind of seems like they didn't have enough scenes together, but maybe it just felt that way because of all the other plotlines going on.

. Speaking of plotlines, I am sorry to say that I found all of them unnecessary and dull. I just wanted more Polin, I couldn't stand the Featherington drama, Mondrich drama, Queen drama, or even Bridgerton drama. Francesa's story was probably the most significant, but I felt it was still very dull!

. However, that won't turn me off from loving this season because I have been waiting EONS for Polin to get together! Someone needs to sedate me!

. LET'S TALK ABOUT COLIN "MANWHORE" BRIDGERTON. I have to say that while I was with everyone else when the news broke and hated the idea, I honestly did not mind it. I found it a good and impactful way to show the difference between meaningless sex vs actual intimacy and love. I liked that Colin was exploring himself and thinking he had to be more "manly" like society dictates, but that his genuine and deep connection with Pen (literally his only real friend aside from his siblings) made that pale in comparison. I LOVED how he was trying to get it off at the brothel but couldn't even GET IT UP when having a threesome. That made me laugh! I was like DAMN girl Penelope you did a number on this man. He is Colin "17 cities" Bridgerton yet ONE kiss from a virgin is enough to turn his world upside down and make him question everything he knows???? Hmmm yeah more of that please.

. Oh, carriage scene. If I loved you less I might be able to talk about you more. I can only say that I've broken my rewind button. It’s got CRACK in it. COLIN'S FACE when he realizes that THIS is the woman I will devote myself to for the rest of my life. He is done with his gallivanting ways and wants to literally just be with one woman for the rest of his life. I feel like without his promiscuous ways and bravado in the earlier episodes, this realisation would not hit as hard. It's no longer just the puppy love that he had with Marina, or the vacant lust he had with other women on his travels, but a true, real, meaningful connection that makes him LOSE HIS MIND. I like that that distinction is VERY clear and leaves no room for doubt that he is CHOOSING her.

. I love that he is “experienced” and that she isn't, but she’s able to bring him to his knees with one kiss! That dynamic is always tea, I fear! Also, I LOVE that my girl Penelope is able to get her needs met by someone who KNOWS what he’s doing. I don’t know what people are saying by “they have no chemistry.” To me, they have chemistry falling out of their ass!

. That being said, I am so scared about the LW reveal!! Holy shit, they are engaged and she still hasn't told him!! Which is different in the books. But LW is different in the show + the Marina thing didn't happen in the books. However, I love that they made LW less scathing in this season. She actually compliments all the debutantes and is really more of a reporter over a tabloid (except for that little thing she wrote about Colin, lol! But she was right!). I feel like Colin's hatred for LW is a little overstated. LW saved him from being trapped in a loveless marriage full of lies. I am shaking to see how this goes! Bring on the angst!

. I actually surprisingly liked the Cressida and Eloise friendship, I liked how it became a vehicle to show another side to Eloise, a more tolerant, compassionate, and realistic side. I loved Eloise and Pen's relationship this season. While they are fighting, they still love and try to protect each other. It's really the secondary love story of the season. We love to see it. I just hope Eloise doesn't fuck with her too much in part 2! (Btw, hate that this season is split into two parts! How am I going to wait until June 13th??? Tf???)

. Also, am I the only one thinking that they are building to Cressida having feelings for Eloise? Their connection and Cressida's sincerity towards Eloise is a little too real. I feel like by going into her stifling home life, they are inching towards that. Also, I am guessing that Cressida will end up marrying Debling, who will be gone so much and won't put any demands on her, so it will more be a marriage of practicality that allows Cressida to explore her feelings. We shall see!

. LET ME JUST SAY I SCREAMED when Penelope put her hand in Colin's hair. I remember in an interview Nicola saying that it was her idea to do that. THANK THE HEAVENS FOR THIS WOMAN !!!!! Because that was actually the hottest part of the season, there I said it. I CHEERED!! And if that was improvised by them, then that means that LUKE'S SLUTTY FACE was also his design!! I cannot thank these two enough for their service to this country!! Also, give Nicola an Oscar right now. I have never seen a more realistic sex scene and depiction of female desire tbh (oh god the moans). Especially in Bridgerton. This was the most real and sincere sex scene they've had yet. Take all the awards!

. LET'S TALK ABOUT COLIN'S FEELINGS. I've seen some people say that the season felt off (which I understand, I think it's bc of all the unnecessary plotlines) because Colin's feelings developed too fast. Let me just say that I DO NOT AGREE. I thought this was an entirely natural and logical progression of events. Think about it. We are not watching a "friends to lovers" arc from scratch. They have had TWO SEASONS of the "friend" part. We have had to watch ignorance, rejection, obliviousness, and misunderstanding between these two. Finally, in their own season, all that groundwork (laid over multiple years) has the chance to come off. It's like a spark that finally lights the embers. Their love has been smouldering under the surface for so long and all it takes is a match (their kiss) to make it spark into flame. Colin has felt so deeply for Penelope for a long time, and indeed they are best friends. He has always admired her as a woman and friend and felt comfortable with her. It wasn't until he kissed her that he realised those feelings were much more layered than he supposed. The fact that he dreams about her and that kiss, and ends up growing regretful and jealous of helping Pen attract other men, is absolutely right. The fact that he tries to get over her by going back to brothels but it DOESN'T WORK is absolutely genius! His love and desire for her, and thereby the realization of his feelings for her, is what propels him to look into himself and find that what he has been trying to be has been a lie. It's in that scene where he's with all the other Rakes. He considers himself, at heart, to be a gentleman - unlike the rest of them, and unlike what he's been presenting. He realizes that all the escapades he had only afforded him vacant experiences. He knows the difference between shallow and real connection now. This is when he decides to stop being someone he's not and embrace himself finally, just as he embraces his feelings for Pen! It's a great moment for his character development. I will be the one to say that by the realization of his feelings for Pen, he comes to the realization of himself.

. ONE MORE THING. I have seen some viewers complain about Penelope being the one to "beg" Colin to kiss her. I think these are more new fans who don't know the books, but I am TIRED of seeing this. The fact that Penelope is finally voicing her desires to the object of her desire after never speaking her mind or asking for what she wants, IS empowering! She is finally taking control of her own destiny! Unabashedly asking for what she wants! Being truthful with herself and brave enough to voice it! That is my GIRL. I was so proud of her. It was at that moment Colin knew that he was fucked (look at his face after he decides to do it). MM HM. That is good shit. I don't see her "begging" for it to be degrading. This was a beautiful moment between two close friends who trust each other more than anything. And that was the match that sparked all those repressed and ignored feelings!

. ALSO, I do not understand why people wanted Penelope to fall on her face after the carriage! WTF? Sure, in the books it’s fine, but actually seeing it??? Do they realise how humiliating and painful that would be? I’m so glad they didn’t do that in the show (and I hope it doesn’t happen in the next part). She is TINY, and do you see that huge ass gap between the carriage and the ground? If she fell, she would scrape her whole hands and face and it would be bloody. Why do people want Pen to suffer in humiliation even more?? It would not be funny.

. ACTUAL LAST THING: I actually LOVED Colin’s dream confession to Penelope, maybe as much as the carriage confession! “I’ve not been able to sleep, to eat, to speak…these days. My entire thoughts consumed by our kiss, by you.” I just loved Luke’s delivery of these lines. Btw, that dream was horny af!

. So, in this way, I don't really understand the complaints about Colin or Polin in this season. I thought it was very well done and well acted. The only complaint is that I needed MORE. MOREEEEE

Anyway, that's all I can think of for now. I'm afraid I have nothing to say about the other storylines because I was resisting the urge to skip them the whole time. My heart lies with Polin and that's what I am focusing on. Thank you for reading!

#I NEEDDD TO BE PUT DOWN #and i need to drop this here bc reddit is a pain in my ass #i can't do shit ova there #bridgerton spoilers #bridgerton season 3 #bridgerton #polin #mine

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fountainpenguin · 7 months ago

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"I wanna hold you, baby, 'cuz I'm gonna miss you like crazy even if I'm halfway around the world~!" (x)

One and a Half Birds

💙 Read on AO3

🧡 Complete! - 15/15 chapters - 113k words

💚 More Pixels Imperfect fics

A server hub story about Mumbo proposing the soul-eating dynamic to Grian before they roleplay it... and Grian fretting over what might happen when he reveals his soul is purple, not blue like everyone else's in this world.

Newbie pictures, creeper biology, hungry phantom hybrids, Watcher Grian drama, and Minecraft surgery await in this hurt/comfort story of friendship and communication.

ft. platonic Buttercups (Grian, Mumbo, Scar) with flirty Ahasbands (Martyn/Mumbo) working out their post-Last Life relationship on the side. Super pleased with how it came out. Enjoy!

(First 1,000 words below the cut)

One and a Half Birds

Baby Pictures

💙 🧡 💚

The thing about Grian is that he has a tendency to buck his head, throwing it back any time he explodes in laughter. It's better than the feel of his jagged fingernails curling tight against your arm and only slightly easier to duck than his flapping wings. Mumbo leans sideways, clutching his drink near his chest, as Grian does exactly what he always does: which is, of course, all three. "Pfffft! Oh, Scaaar! Wow… I never- I never knew you were such a little nerd back in your newbie days! What is up with your hair? Is that white dye?"

Careful, Grian… I really, really don't want to spill this all over your lovely couch. Grian's actually got a nice flat for someone who rarely lingers here while in Between. Mumbo cups one hand around his wooden cup, catching a droplet before it can splatter on a throw pillow.

"Hey, hey," Scar protests, leaning forward. Grian and Mumbo are on the couch, but Scar is standing with one hand inside his jacket pocket. Grian's still got a finger jabbing at the screenshot in the scrapbook. It probably looks upside-down to Scar. That fits.

The sheepish boy in the picture (who's dangling upside-down himself from an oak branch) is grinning at his own reflection in the pond below. He's a whole lot younger than the Scar standing in front of them now. If you squint, you can see the places he hadn't quite grown into his own skin. The blue wings flapping at his shoulders are smaller, but much brighter in color. Definitely an allay hybrid in a way the vex standing before them isn't.

"You look like Victor Frankenstein."

"That was 700 years ago! Don't be picking on a man's looks. Little Scar can't even defend himself!"

"Little Scar can't do nuttin' to me. I'll talk about his silly hair all I like."

Scar surges forward, scooping Grian behind the back and under the legs. Grian's wings snap out. He hardly has time to yelp before Scar flips him backwards off the couch. Mumbo's brows shoot into his hair. Grian scrabbles with his fingertips, howling and gasping, and Scar springs knee-first on the cushions to grab his wrists. Their pixels slam together, spurting sparks, and Grian (knees already on the ground) tilts back his head. Scar draws in close, breathing slow, until his mouth is practically brushing Grian's ear.

"Long… live… the king."

With that, he shoves Grian to the floor with a thud. Grian doesn't get up, but lies there like a fish, crumpled in his own jumper. Mumbo chuckles.

"Never a dull moment with you two, huh? … You wanna see my newbie pictures?"

That does get Grian off the floor. Scar drops down on the cushion beside him and Grian pops up from behind the couch, arms folded on the back of it. Mumbo flips through the pages in his own book, looking for one in particular he's not even sure he still has. He's only a couple in when Grian slams down his hand, crowing laughter.

"You're younger than me, Mumbo! Why do you look like an old man?"

It's true. He sort of does, doesn't he? Wrinkled forehead, dark and squinty eyes… He's even wearing a bowtie in most of these, though back then he hadn't picked out the three-piece suit he often wears in public now. Mostly white button-ups. Occasionally his full wandering trader robes. Mumbo got his start much younger than Scar did, though he's not sure he can say the same for Grian.

He squints, running his thumb down the corner of one screenshot in particular. Unlike Scar's pictures from his first singleplayer, most of his were taken in the Between dimension. Huh. His home village of Little Sun has changed quite a lot, actually, from what it used to be… but the spawn temple with its little teal and turquoise banners is still the same.

And yet… I still have Double-U and Buzz. His llamas have stayed beside him all his off-server life. Their white wool still flourishes, accented with familiar pale brown spots like chunks of cookie dough in vanilla ice cream. The spots shift around between their respawns, but the long lashes and affectionate headbutts are always the same. Speaking of the girls, he should send False a whisper to confirm she actually did check on them tonight. He doesn't doubt her… His comm just hasn't pinged with an incoming message yet.

"You look like Etho," Scar observes, indicating the red scarf wrapped around his mouth in one screenshot on the next page.

"Sorry- I just can't get over how old and tired you look, Mumbo… I doubt you'd even made it to the Far Lands back then, but this fella already looks like he's seen too much."

"Oh, go on, then!" Mumbo claps the book shut. "Let's see your newbie screenshots."

All the energy whirls out of Grian chest in that moment. "My what?"

"Yeah! Let's do that!" Scar throws an arm around him, double punching Grian in the shoulder so hard, he flashes red. "C'mon, G! Get the book! You know, I half believe you spawned into existence without ever being a newbie account. I've literally never heard you talk about your spawn temple."

"Um-"

Mumbo concurs with a lift of his drink, like making a toast. "Look, you can't talk smack and then leave us hanging, bud. That just ain't bro!" (Is he saying that right? The whole 'dragon bro' bit was always a mite difficult to wrap his head around).

"… Right. Uh, let me just…" Grian pushes away from the couch, sliding his hands into his pockets. Mumbo watches his tongue press against the inside of his cheek. "Right, okay… Let me just ask Two where he last put it…"

Mumbo and Scar let him go, both craning their heads to follow Grian along the corridor with their eyes anyway. Two, BadTime, and Drone are all in Two's room frosting cookies and making party plans. Mumbo watches Grian twist the doorknob, then returns his attention to the book of screenshots in his lap. You know, there are some really nice ones in here. His only regret may be not taking more while he had the chance.

I like to think I grew up nice, actually… And then, Why aren't WE having a party in pajamas? Don't get him wrong, because he loves his suspenders and Scar likes his jacket (and Grian is, well, Grian), but…

"Scar? We're missing out, bud."

"S'cuse me?"

"No pajamas."

"Oh… Next time!"

[Full story on AO3 - Link at top]

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artiststarme · 2 years ago

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No Steves Allowed!

Okay guys, I decided to the DnD one first today but I'll probably end up posting the parent fic today too. I've never actually played DnD so if this doesn't make sense, let me know! I hope you guys like it and please leave your thoughts in the comments.

~*~*~*~

Eddie wasn’t a big fan of rules, or setting boundaries, or partaking in any form of mass conformity. When he made his DnD club, he wanted it to be a safe space for all the outsiders and outcasts to relax and enjoy their high school years. (And join his DnD campaigns so he could torture them but that was neither here nor there). However, there was one rule that was non-negotiable and grounds for immediate character damage and death.

There was to be no mention of Steve Harrington.

It didn’t matter if he was your partner in chemistry for a project or if you were complaining about his crony bumping into you in the hall, no one was allowed to mention him by name or otherwise as soon as Eddie stepped into the drama room. This confused the original Hellfire members as well as their successors but everyone conceded eventually. Especially when mentions of Steve brought about the painful and horrific deaths of their characters.

Gareth, the little shit that he is, tempted the rule the most, even still. Even after all of the characters he’s lost (one named Stephen that was beheaded by a griffin carrying a blade from a fallen half-elf soldier and several others that tried to work the name ‘Steve’ into a background story), he still liked to poke the bear at least once a campaign.

“Galahad, it’s your play. What course of action will you take to persuade the innkeeper into allowing you and your friends a place of slumber for the night?” Eddie asked him, his voice firm and powerful as he enveloped his Dungeon Master persona.

He already regretted giving him the chance to speak after he saw a slow smirk spread across his face. “Well, dear Dungeon Master, I think I’m going to go back to the bar and collect my friend Stephen Nicehair. Then I’ll use his looks and luscious locks to seduce the innkeeper into giving us beds.”

Eddie could feel his left eye twitching in annoyance. ‘Stephen Nicehair’? That’s the best Gareth could do?

“As you turn around to go back to the bar, you hear the innkeeper release a battle cry. He drops the pillows in his hands to reveal a cursed dagger with an obsidian blade. The previously friendly man plunges the dagger into your chest without hesitation and twists it in your heart to deliver maximum pain. Roll damage.”

Gareth sighed but rolled his dice, “six.”

“As the life fades out of your eyes, the innkeeper leans in closer to your face and whispers, ‘no one tries to outsmart me in my inn’. You die just as you lived… Pathetically. Galahad the Bad is now dead, existing on the floor of the inn in a pool of blood with the dagger still protruding from his rib cage. Your party is now cursed by the Goddess of Death because your blood was spilled on the cursed obsidian blade. ‘Til next time, boys.”

The entire Party was silent for a moment in shock until Dustin loudly erupted. “What the hell was that?! The innkeeper? Eddie, he’s an NPC that was supposed to offer us shelter after saving the town, what the fuck?”

Jeff shook his head at him and patted Dustin’s shoulder, “hey man, Eddie really doesn’t like it when people break his rules. It’s better not to question the consequences.”

“What rules?” He turned to Eddie to point an accusing finger at him. “You said that you hated rules because they forced conformity onto people outside the mold. And all he did was say he was going to get his friend Stephen to help!”

Eddie’s eyes flashed dangerously as he leaned in closer to Dustin. “Roll for initiative and persuasion.”

“Eddie-”

“Roll Henderson!” He screamed.

Dustin sighed brattily but rolled the dice as directed, “fourteen for initiative and ten for persuasion with my modifier.”

Eddie grinned at him maniacally. “Elric steps up to the innkeeper to try and appease him of his anger only for the man to pull another dagger from his cloak and slice it across Elric’s neck. You can feel the warmth of the blood spill down your front and feel some of the traitorous liquid bubble into your mouth and through your lips. You can’t breathe and can only gurgle a single question. What do you ask?”

“I ask him why he killed me!” Dustin said, a mixture of alarm, shock, and outrage in his voice.

Eddie leaned in close to him, the evil glint in his eye still fully present and terrifying. He switches his cadence to match the hoarse voice of the innkeeper and says, “‘You can’t speak of Stephen or any of his aliases and stay in the world of the living.’ Elric falls to the ground and bleeds out all over the floor. The innkeeper steps over your useless body and says to your Party, ‘It’s a no to the shelter, take the bodies of your compatriots and leave or face the same fate.’”

Mike looks pissed and Lucas looks shocked at the turn this relatively happy session took. Meanwhile, Jeff and Grant were busy alternating their glares between Gareth and Eddie. Dustin just looked flabbergasted that his bard was murdered so callously by what he thought would be an innocent NPC.

“Alright, let’s pause there for now and we’ll pick it up next week. Some of you have new characters to make. Also, as a reminder to the senior members and a precaution for the new members, there will be absolutely no mention of Steve Harrington. Thank you, you’re adjourned.” Eddie spoke and waved them off.

“What? But Steve-”

“I said adjourned, Henderson!” And from that moment on, Steve wasn’t mentioned at Hellfire. The kids slipped up here and there, especially given their hero worship of the guy but no one said his name aloud again in fear of losing another character. But then Eddie experienced the Spring Break from hell, found out that Steve Harrington was actually a pretty good guy, and started dating him.

The rule posed a problem once Eddie was finally able to talk Steve into joining a one-shot campaign. It took months of dating and illicit promises to get Steve to make a character, honorably named Steeb Munsington, and sit down with all of Hellfire to play.

“So how’s this supposed to work? Are we just ignoring Steeb the entire campaign?” Lucas asked him.

“What why? Why are you ignoring me? Did I do something?” Steve looked adorably alarmed and glanced concernedly between Lucas and Eddie.

Lucas patted his hand from his seat next to him. “Eddie has a rule about bringing you up during a session. If we mention you, our character gets serious hit points. No offense man, but I’m not taking that chance.”

Steve turned to Eddie with a hurt look. Oh shit, he had to fix this quick.

“Obviously it’s void now! Obviously guys, shut up.” He turned to Steve. “Don’t worry Stevie, that was a joke.”

“Oh was it a joke when you murdered Elric the Bard for questioning Galahad’s unfair demise?!”

“Henderson, shut your mouth right now or you can kiss Kalston the Killer goodbye right now.” When he opened his mouth to argue, Eddie cut him off again. “The rule is clearly void now! I only had the rule in the first place so you guys wouldn’t be able to tease me about my crush on Steve. Now we’re dating so it’s fine. The rule has been discredited, no more capital punishment for mentioning his name.”

“You’re dating?!” Dustin screamed in shock. Eddie sent a panicked glance at Steve who was glaring at him with his arms crossed over his chest. He wouldn’t be getting any help from him.

“You’re gay?” Mike muttered in bafflement. Wow, nothing got past that kid.

“You murdered eleven of my characters because of a crush?” Gareth shrieked, his face turning red in anger.

Will stared at the two of them in shock while the rest of the Party raised their voices in uproar. He was completely frozen while insults and accusations were thrown, thankfully more due to the fact that Eddie had gone on a rampage as DM rather than them being gay. How were they not focusing on the gay comment?

“Not just a crush anymore, he’s been my boyfriend for months! And if you had stopped violating my rule, they wouldn’t have died! Anyways, let’s let bygones be bygones and move along with our campaign. We only have eight hours to get this done today before the sheep have curfew.” Eddie clapped his hands and grinned.

Jeff shook his head at him and Grant muttered angrily under his breath. Gareth, though, exploded. “You murdered a shit ton of my characters for even saying words that sounded like Steve! And now you just want us to move along because you’re dating the guy now! Congratulations by the way, we all noticed you seemed happier lately. Steve, if you hurt him, I’ll kill you like he killed all of my characters for even saying your name. What the fuck, Eddie?!”

“Jesus Christ, it was a long time ago! If you drop this, I’ll give everyone extra XP to start, okay? Double.” Gareth was still glaring at him. “Triple.”

“Fine but deep down, I’m still pissed off.” Gareth muttered.

“Noted, now let’s start. Stevie, I can help you out if you need it. Steeb is going to do great, I’m sure. I’m not above torturing my friends when it comes to you, okay?”

“Eddie!” Everyone besides him and Steve yelled. Ah yes, this was going to be a good gameday indeed.

Permanent tag list: @doubleb11 @nburkhardt @zerokrox-blog @newtstabber @i-less-than-three-you @carlyv @pyrohonk @straight4joekeery @trippypancakes @conversesweetheart @estrellami-1 @suddenlyinlove @yikes-a-bee @swimmingbirdrunningrock @perseus-notjackson @anaibis @merricatty @maya-custodios-dionach @grtwdsmwhr @manda-panda-monium @lumoschild @goodolefashionedloverboi @mentallyundone @awkwardgravity1

#Steve does end up playing but he would much rather just watch from behind Eddie's screen #Dustin can't believe they told him they were dating like that #Steve is pissed at Eddie for outing them at first but forgives him once he brings him lunch and flowers to Family Video the next day #Robin doesn't forgive so easily #stranger things #steddie #fanfic #steve harrington #eddie munson #gareth emerson #jeff #grant #dustin henderson #mike wheeler #lucas sinclair

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eshtaresht · 2 years ago

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holy. fuckin'. DAMN. I was pretty good at predicting the plot so far, but this episode proved that stampede is going in a whole new direction for real. spoilers for ep 9!!! (and manga a bit)

first of all, we still haven't got a full story of the great fall, but I think it's something they'll reveal in this season, probably during confrontation with knives. and still no scar reveal!! I'm angy but it's something that could be relevant to the standoff with knives, hope we'll get it

the piano scene... oh we're eating GOOD, it's just so wholesome but goes to confirm my theory that twins weren't completely fine on the ship. vash feeling useless because he can't do cool plant shit, knives envying vash for being good at human shit.... oh it's great

so glad knives is getting proper characterization and not just "he evil because he evil"! the fear, the hurt, the genuine care for vash, but then frustration with him – it's right there and I'm eating it up so yummy

the way they recontextualized vash's arm loss is GORGEOUS! I've seen ppl reading this scene differently, but to me it was an act of care from naï. he looks really scared for a reason: we see that the gate consumed all matter, including the hand. vash couldn't control it, so it would only grow bigger and destroy him. NAÏ REALIZED THIS AND SAVED VASH THE ONLY WAY HE COULD

he didn't want to fight him, this was not an act of anger, like in previous versions. all he cared about in that moment was saving his twin..... and what did he get in return? a gun pointed to his face. a gun he gave vash to kill human scum. oh, the DRAMA

ahem, now to the less intense stuff

homeboy has so much trauma, like, damn... how is he gonna fit any more from his impending epic brother fight...... I'm quite curious on how they're gonna characterize him in the next season. concidering that we're taking off earlier than previous versions, he might end up with the same unhinged vibe 98' vash had, as a coping mechanism (if depression didn't work, try dissociation and silliness). but then it would be even more interesting to see meryl's and wolfwood's reactions: they knew him before the accident and saw the big sad

vash has sense in the prosthetic arm, so it must've hurt when he damaged it... probably it hurts less than the real one, and it's clearly painless to take off. but the hand seems to be rather sensitive and fic writers are gonna go crazy for this

age reveal! also brad and luida being in cryosleep makes sense, I was racking my brain on how they're still alive. seems like they're using much more plant power tho... both for cryo and the vegetation, while in manga they tried to keep it as low as possible and send signals to earth

saw someone say that they're probably not doing that here because the earth is destroyed... could be that they decided to go the hard way. but in the manga the earth was still fucked, and it wasn't clear if they communicated with the ppl left on the planet or the fleet that was in some new place. what I'm saying is, there is a possibility that they are looking for help in stampede, we just don't know it yet

meryl was so cute! go off, comedy relief goofy girl, while you can, there is more trauma coming your way :3 yeah, enjoy roberto calling you by your first name... oh it would be such a shame if he gave you his derringer before his untimely death..........

pretty weird that nobody knows why they fell on no man's land, but ppl probably were too ashamed of their past and 150 years later the new generation is oblivious. also so funny that luida has to explain what vegies are..... they have so many plants but haven't see any plants

tbh I wasn't expecting the zazie twist at all, but I'm excited! they are SO gender in stampede, might be the best redesign in the series, love me a genderless bug creature with bold fashion choices. really cool to see that storyline adapted, it was barely touched upon in the last volumes of trimax

btw the multiple bullets story about a plant, worm and human who went around figuring out if their species could coexist and just.... creating this foud family and then building a town there all were equal...... that's my favorite mb story for sure

wolfwood saying "I'm not your friend"... I know what you are. and we got a "you'll have to decide one day"... oh oh the misery, but the context was lacking. it just doesn't hit the same when he isn't daring vash to shoot him in the most homoerotic way possible. on and he looks so goofy trying to ride with his cross

in the last ep's rant I assumed that luida lied about rem saving everybody for some reason?? but no, she actually saved them, I just got a bit confused

so, as I predicted, the gang separated (tho not because of vash) and by the end of the next episode vash'll be in july and meet naï. the poster, man.... that gorgeous futuristic city is getting obliterated for sure

btw vash's gate being opposite to knives and sort of a black hole is nothing new. but there are new layers to this, like vash willingly giving away energy, but destroying things against his will, and knives with the opposite of this. ying yan twins go brrrr

#such a blast of an episode although the middle part on the seeds ship was kinda boring #stampede make more than one model for background chatecters challenge: impossible #every new episode is finding a new way to destroy me.... the season finale will be the death of me #trigun #trigun stampede #vash the stampede #meryl stryfe #millions knives #trigun spoilers #trigun stampede spoilers #wolfwood

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bookaddict24-7 · 10 months ago

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REVIEWS OF THE WEEK!

EVERY WEEK I WILL POST VARIOUS REVIEWS I’VE WRITTEN SO FAR IN 2024. YOU CAN CHECK OUT MY GOODREADS FOR MORE UP-TO-DATE REVIEWS HERE.

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24. Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Maas--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read January 2024

I've been wanting to re-read this series for a while because I never finished it. I remember really enjoying this first book in the series because of the competition aspect of it and I'd say I still enjoyed that!

I also see the foreshadowing for the MC's ability to attract all of the men in her life LOL. While I might not have enjoyed it as much as the first time, I still enjoyed it for the most part. There were a lot of things I forgot about and was delighted to be reminded of. The MC is a badass, but her constant "I could kill him with two moves" comments at the beginning had me rolling my eyes a few times.

Even though I know book two will break my heart again, I can't wait to pick it up. Also, SO MANY clues in this one about her identity that I missed the first time around. Definitely one of those books that is worth reading more than once just to catch all of the little pieces of the overall puzzle.

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25. Mixed Signals by B.K. Borison--⭐️⭐️⭐️

I have a bit of a gripe with this author. While I like a good chunk of the books she writes, the third act breakups are so infuriating. They take away all of those happy feelings that were building up throughout the book because the drama and miscommunication for the third acts are freaking ridiculous.

I was listening to this book last night when it happened--the inevitable "I'm afraid and a coward and let me let you stew in this miscommunication so that it somehow makes sense for me to break up with you because I'm so scared." Listen, as someone who has anxiety and has relegated herself to singledom because I don't want to deal with the messy emotions, I UNDERSTAND. It's freaking scary. BUT. But for the love of god, there are better ways around this. This manufactured and forced drama is so frustrating. I literally wanted to throw the book out the window.

These characters deserve better.

Three stars because I loved them when they were actually functioning like human beings and not drama puppets. Three stars for the small town side characters, who I have loved the whole way through this series (I'd give THEM a higher rating). And three stars for the diversity of a Latine character (even if the Spanish was sometimes questionable.)

Will I read the last book? Of course. I want to read about the other couple, but I KNOW that I'm going to be frustrated as well. Listen, I didn't think I was going to get as annoyed as with the climax of book one (because book two was actually kind of okay with the climax), but oh man. The FRUSTRATION.

Sigh. Moving on. Read this series if you want cute moments and sexy characters, but be prepared for the moments of frustration. This FMC has a lot of things to work through and I think one of the things that frustrates me the most about these third act breakups is that they feel like they come out of nowhere. They're fine in the moment and then boom, "I'm a coward."

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26. Breathless by Amy McCulloch--⭐️⭐️⭐️

One of the issues I have with adult thrillers is that I sometimes build them up a lot more in my head than the story itself. While BREATHLESS kind of suffers from this, it had its interesting and captivating moments.

I thought the mountain climbing aspect of the book was really cool and I wanted the MC to prove everyone wrong, including her awful ex-boyfriend. Granted I know nothing about mountain climbing, but that aspect of the book is probably one of the main reasons why I kept listening to this audiobook.

The mystery was not predictable but also it kind of was? LOL. It's hard to explain--I didn't actively think it was one person, but when it was all revealed, I thought it made a lot of sense. Like I said, I thought the mountain climbing was the true thrilling aspect of this book.

Overall, this was fun and I loved that ending, but it wasn't something I think I'll be thinking about a month from now. It was good, but *shrug*.

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27. Slewfoot by Brom--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I didn't know what to expect from this beautiful book. I purchased it a couple of years ago because all of my friends were talking about it, so of course I fell to the peer pressure. Just like the beautiful and eerie artwork, the story itself is unsettling and straddles that morally grey line of justified vengeance and anger versus a society's portrayal of evil (ie. a woman refusing to be cowed by a male's authority.)

Reading this gave me this odd sense of satisfaction when everything came to a head--especially thinking about all of the women who were accused of witchcraft and murdered. I especially felt this anger when I think about how many people the MC helped and how those people let their fear and hatred guide their actions against her. I think, beyond the cowardice of a man not accepting defeat, that angered me the most--women turning on each other because of a male dominated society's idealism and "godliness".

Needless to say, I loved this and couldn't put it down. I wanted to know what came next, even though I KNEW it wouldn't be something good. I'm just grateful that Brom knew that I would be looking for those satisfying moments of vengeance.

Also, I'd call this terror in the sense of that overhanging fear of what comes next. But even with the gory bits and the blood lust, I'd say the real terror in this book is humanity and how easily they are swayed. It all leads to me wanting to ask: who is the true devil here?

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28. From Dead to Worse by Charlaine Harris--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I can't believe I've made it this far! Although, I have this feeling I have because the deja vu is hitting me HARD.

FROM DEAD TO WORSE had so much going on, but unlike some of the other books before this one, this one actually took place closer to home. I kind of missed reading about Sookie's misadventures near her home. We got to revisit a lot of her relationships with the men in her life in this one--like the cleanser book for any ends that weren't fully cut clean.

I may have been spoiled for who's endgame, so I am totally seeing how Harris starting laying down the little hints here and there. But even so, knowing this doesn't stop certain moments from feeling bittersweet for me.

More things were revealed and Sookie grew even more as a character. I understood why she made the choices she made because she's finally putting her self-worth above those of the men in her life, but I still DID feel a little bad for her beau in this one. But again, I am on her side because she's been dealt some shitty men cards in the last eight books.

Onto the next one!

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29. The Fake Mate by Lana Ferguson--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

After trying and failing to read Ferguson's THE NANNY, I really wasn't sure what to expect with this vastly different genre of a book. I'm honestly so glad I decided to give this a shot anyway because THIS WAS SO MUCH FUN.

I was hooked onto the story and I loved the different tropes that were used. The whole grumpy/sunshine thing will always be a winner with me, and I am a puddle for this kind of tension. And don't even get me started on the smut. Omg, this man. The dirty talk in this was *chef's kiss*. This man is hot HOT.

I also really liked how the climax of the story was handled, even if one of my least favourite tropes was temporarily employed. I admire a self-sufficient FMC who can slap some sense into the MMC.

I do recommend this book to romance lovers, but I know that the topics explored in this book may be new to some. Research beforehand might be an awkward time LOL.

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30. Just Happy to Be Here by Naomi Kanakia--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I want to preface my review by stating that I am not a member of the Trans community, so my opinions on this book are from an outsider's perspective.

JUST HAPPY TO BE HERE was an intense read, both because of the clear transphobia and because of the MC's youth/naive nature about the people around her. The number of times she was cut off by those around her, or had such clear transphobic comments and actions done against her and she brushed them off was rage-inducing. I think I know why she does this--especially at the end, when it all ties up really nicely together, but in the moment, I felt immense rage towards the people around her.

Kanakia's novel touches on so much happening right now in society and how people twist narratives to fit their agendas and their means. How some people can see one person as an "object" to further their ideologies.

This book just made me feel a lot and made me so angry, but I know I am privileged in my cis-life. My heart broke for the kids who are in these situations and/or are surrounded by people who just refuse to see beyond their own biases and hatred.

I also appreciate the representation of the complex familial relationship between the MC and her parents--it may have been imperfect, but as an adult, I can see the love there for their daughter.

Between the beautiful cover, the emotionally stimulating and thought-provoking story, and the raw reality of a young character trying to figure herself out, I do recommend JUST HAPPY TO BE HERE. I do also recommend that the TWs be heeded: transphobic language, transphobia, internalized racism, transmisogyny. Read with care--but know that this is a pretty important story. Also, Kanakia has a pretty great author's note at the end!

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31. The Probability of Everything by Sarah Everett--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

THE PROBABILITY OF EVERYTHING was so much more than what I was expecting and although my heart feels wounded and my eyes are still feeling that aching pressure after a good cry, I'm so grateful I was able to experience it.

Twelve year old me wishes she had this book to read when my world changed so irrevocably, much like the MC of this book.

This heartbreaking novel follows a young scientist-to-be who likes to deal with probabilities in exchange for the anxiety surrounding her world ending. We are faced with a family grieving the end and how everyone handles it differently.

I don't even know what else to say about this book for fear of spoiling it--but know that it is powerful, important, and heart-rending.

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32. Long Shot by Kennedy Ryan--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read: January 2024

I've been wanting to re-read LONG SHOT for a while, even though it is a very heavy and dark book. I had forgotten just how dark this book gets and while I highly recommend it, I do still super recommend you check out the trigger warnings.

Despite the dark and the abuse, the shining light was the blossoming romance between the two MCs and how, if something is truly destined for you, it'll happen.

LONG SHOT is a book full of emotion, heart, heartbreak, and a bit of magic in the sense that Karma is a bitch and it comes for all. Also, the FMC is one strong woman who did everything she could to protect those she loves. Kennedy touches on the misconceptions that haunt survivors of DA, which I thought was a very important aspect of the book.

Now I want to read the rest of the trilogy, which I never read after the first time I read this one.

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33. Two Twisted Crowns by Rachel Gillig--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

I am always wary of sequels--especially when it's for fantasy books I initially really enjoyed. Somehow, Rachel Gillig delivers a sequel that was even better than the first book. TWO TWISTED CROWNS was a delight of a read full of dark moments, high intensity, anger, and a love story I felt more deeply than in book one.

The angst alone between two of the characters I wasn't expecting to see together was better than I could have ever hoped for. This was what made this book even more fun--just me casually waiting for these characters to just cross that line with each other.

Also, I found that TWO TWISTED CROWNS had me reacting more viscerally towards the hateful villains. The way I wanted to smack a bitch in this book because how dare they hurt these precious beings?

And, hi, I wasn't expecting to cry? Imagine that I'm enjoying this darker fantasy novel when all of a sudden, my eyes start to water during an emotional scene.

Let's applaud Gillig for making this a duology (hopefully) and not dragging this in a ten series saga. This whole series was such an incredible piece of fiction. I'm glad I fell into the hype and read these two books.

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34. Holes by Louis Sachar--⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Re-read January 2024

I don't even know how many times I read this when I was a kid. Reading it as an adult now was such an interesting experience. For one, the story felt a lot shorter and quicker than I remember it being. I also remembered everything because I'm not kidding when I say that I read this A LOT as a kid.

Being an adult, I can also see how truly sad this story could get--especially one of the historical stories told throughout the book.

Such an amazing classic and truly a gem.

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Have you read any of these books? Would you recommend them?

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Happy reading!

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themosleyreview · 7 months ago

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The Mosley Review: The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare

Do you wanna know why we constantly revisit World War II in film? It isn't because it was the greatest war. It isn't because of the enginuity that came from it. Its because it features the most robust stories ever to be told or discovered whether its from the American or the European campaign. There are probably hundreds of classified documents that are still sealed to this day and it is always fascinating to see them revealed. Yes, we love the heroism in the stories about the front lines, but what's more interesting to see is the internal planning of all Allied Forces and how they're plans get executed. Whether they succeed or fail is the real drama and the stuff of legend that ends up inspiring fictional characters we all know and love. That is what this film lovingly highlights and I have to say it was a smooth and joyful ride has good suspense with great action and comedy. The tone was a bit off at times as it would struggle with wanting to be a smart espionage driven story and a adventure film with little consequence for the heroes in the story.

Henry Cavill truly charms every moment he's on screen as Gus March-Phillipps. He was a fun leader of the ragtag team of mercenaries and I liked his controlled nature. He never really seemed to have doubts, but he did have a moment or too that he felt challenged. The amount of glee and calm he has in this film was cool in the more action driven scenes. The most standout moment of the film truly comes from his introductive scene as within in five minutes, you understand the man and his motivation. Alan Ritchson was good and brutal as his fellow merc, Anders Lassen. I liked the banter he had with Gus as the film went along and how eager and efficient of a Nazi killer he was. Henry Golding was fun and smart as the explosive expert of the team, Freddy Alvarez. The banter between him and Anders was fun as they would tease each other often. Hero Fiennes Tiffin was good as Henry Hayes and even though he didn't have that much depth, he was effective and a valued navigator in the war occupied Atlantic Ocean. Alex Pettyfer was cool and collected as Gus's oldest friend, Geoffrey Appleyard. You really felt the bond and history between them in the scenes that they had together. Cary Elwes is always a joy to see on screen and as Brigadier Gubbins 'M', he was perfectly royal and commanding as the leader of the secret operation the team is recruited for. Freddie Fox was good as the iconic Ian Fleming and I loved that he was apart of the operation from beginning to end. He wasn't a forgotten character and I liked that he seemed to plotting out his soon to be famous character. Rory Kinnear was fantastic and steadfast as Winston Churchill. He had a dominating presence and sense of urgency that is needed for the legendary Prime Minister. Eiza González and Babs Olusanmokun were fantastic as Marjorie Stewart and Mr. Heron. Their chemistry together was great and I enjoyed their convert planning and business deals. Eiza charms the screen with such control in her more tense dialogue scenes and Babs was that quiet type of dangerous that you never saw coming. Til Schweiger is always intense as a hero or villain and as Heinrich Luhr, there is an amount of sinister motivation in his eyes that made him the marquee antagonist.

The score by the director's frequent collaborator, Christopher Benstead, was good, quirkie and epic toward the end of the film. I felt the tension in the finale the most thanks to his score as the action kicks off and the plan doesn't go as smooth. Like I said before, the tone was a little all over the place at times since you have so many parts moving at once. Director Guy Ritchie's flair for elaborate planning was on display, but it felt a little rusty in its execution. Its a massive cast so not everyone has a chance to have a moment to shine outside of the action. Maybe some of them didn't really have much to work with or the real people in the true story the film was based on weren't that deep. Either way, I still had fun with the film and I enjoyed the action. Is it gonna be one of the most memorable films of Guy Ritchie's filmography, no, but it'll be a fun one to view once in awhile. Let me know what you thought of the film or my review in the comments below. Thanks for reading!

#the ministry of ungentlemanly warfare #henry cavill #alan ritchson #alex pettyfer #henry golding #eiza gonzalez #babs olusanmokun #cary elwes #rory kinnear #freddie fox #til schweiger

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frayed-at-the-seams · 3 days ago

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Favourite Trope: meeting before canon plot starts.

BL dramas where the characters either met as children before the show plot started. (Will include spoilers for each show).

- Time of Fever.

This drama was beautiful. It portrayed two childhood friends who were separated for two years to then reunite in their late teens.

The show explores how they struggle to adjust to the new people they have become while trying to pick up where their friendship has left off. The introduction of new feelings and the personal struggles each character goes through in relation to this was explored beautifully. There was a real sense of long pining and teen awkwardness that both the actors and the cinematography displayed with effect.

It was a beautiful show that had me clutching at my plushies at frustration over the chemistry between the main characters. You get a real sense of depth in their relationship. There are many layers and history between them that just gives the show a more poignant feel.

Available on KissKH.

- Minato’s Laundromat.

I have mentioned this drama before and I will probably do so again. This is one of my favourite comfort dramas. While a bit cliche and unrealistic and clearly based off a manga, it is still a fun and capturing watch.

This show tells the story of a jaded man in his late twenties and the peace he has found running a laundromat and the young man who is pursuing him. Their dynamic is flirty, teasing and fun. The characters going through their own growth and learning about each other before they get together.

The added reveal that the main character saved the male lead from drowning as a child adds depth to the male lead’s stubborn pursuit of the main character. What was a memorable but ultimately past moment for the main character was a life changing experience for the male lead. Their first meeting before the show really adds backstory for the show plot and adds another layer to their dynamic.

Available on Viki and KissKH.

- 4 Minutes.

This show was a whirlwind of second guessing plots. With plots layered on top of one and another the reveal that the main couple met as children, an event forgotten by both of them, served to be more of an Easter egg for the viewers rather than adding much to their story.

A Easter Egg that I and other viewers ate up. It was fun to watch their interactions as children and see them unknowingly play out similar interactions as adults. Since the majority of this drama plot involved the viewers having knowledge that the characters did not have themselves, the viewers having a omnipotent view of all the interacting events, this reveal into a bit of their childhood was a spoon of sugar to sweeten us for further angst.

Still, the scene was adorable to see and it only added another layer of ‘What if’ to the plot line.

Available on KissKH.

- We Best Love.

Instead of childhood friends to lovers, this is childhood enemies to lovers. Well, one sided enemies to lovers. That just means that their chemistry was that just bit more fiery than other dramas. And I love a good enemies to lovers dynamic. Especially one with lots of history as this one had.

Even in season 2, when they have gone from e-bikes to lovers to bitter exes back to lovers again, their chemistry has a passion to it that many dramas miss. The main couple love each other so much that it angers them. They simply cannot get over each other and even when fighting and manhandling, they are gentle and sweet. As a viewer you can really feel the history between them despite them not getting to know each other on a deeper level until university. The fact that they don’t truly learn about the other properly until they’re adults means that their relationship can develop further than it would have ever done as children. It was great fun to watch.

Available on KissKH and Bilibili.

- Mr Heart.

If you want one sided unrequited love between a silent admirer and someone who doesn’t know he exists, then Mr heart is for you. Adorable and sweet. The drama starts with Jinwon being properly introduced to Sangha and as it develops the viewer gets to see their backstory from both their points of view as the characters get tangled in their marathon careers and their backgrounds.

Well made with a sweet atmosphere despite the angsty parts, it is a wholesome drama with a lovely ending.

Available one Viki and KissKH.

- I became the main role in a BL drama.

This is a short Japanese bl, only 4 episodes. Yet it had such a funny and wholesome story. The character development between the MC and the ML is so sweet and perfectly explored despite the short run time. The side characters were fun and all of it was well acted.

The reveal that they met briefly when they were teenagers is the perfect backstory for the ML’s love and devotion to the MC. He accepted him for his differences and it left a lasting impression.

This show had me laughing.

Available on Bilibili and KissKH.

- Word of Honor.

While China made this a bromance, it’s still high quality gay (with all that flirting and long pining stares, how could it not be?). I love the slow burn and the mysteries that move the plot along.

Especially the mystery behind Wen Kexing’s past. That had me hooked for the majority of the show. The revelation that he and Zhou Zishu had met as children, that their lives were always meant to be tangled together was both lovely and bittersweet for me. Their lives both full of tragedy and trauma yet they still found each other. I did cry watching this show, more than once. Yet I still love it.

Available on Netflix and Viki.

- Kiseki: Dear to me.

While the main couple meet for the first time during the canon plot. The side couple are childhood friends to lover trope, but not without angst and separation and lots of drama.

In any other setting, with any other characters their dynamic would be toxic. It’s codependent and even with the separation, they are too obsessed and wrapped up in each other. They carry a history which is clear in all of their interactions and chemistry. Even though we don’t get to see know how they met, we know that their history is tangled and caught up emotions.

It’s safe to say that the second couple stole the show for me. I wish we got more of their backstory.

Available on Viki and KissKH.

- Old Fashion Cupcake.

Another excellent 4 episode drama from Japan. This show is the love story between a 39 year old office worker and his 29 year old coworker. Since the characters are adults there is a softness that is sometimes lacking in other dramas. They are independent and do not need each other. That makes the moments of vulnerability and affection between them that much sweeter.

Their shared history and the flashback of Nozue interviewing and hiring Togawa just add more history to their bond. I love their romance and their bond. One of my favourite comfort shows.

Available on Viki and KissKH.

This took far longer than I expected. Hope you like the recommendations.

Feel free to comment any trope recommendations you want next.

#old fashion cupcake #bl drama recommendations #bl drama #korean bl #japanese bl #chinese bl #thai bl #time of fever #kiseki: dear to me #word of honor #i became the main role of a bl drama #taiwanese bl #4 minutes #mr hearts #we best love #minato shouji coin laundry

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grimmmviewing · 9 months ago

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S1E8: “Game Ogre”—B/C+ (Watched 2/29/24)

“No record of where he was born, no record of a family. It’s like this guy just fell out of the sky.” – Hank re. an ogre/giant (Got a, not exactly unhappy, groan from me!)

“Just the facts, right?” – Monroe to Nick/Hank re. the ownership of an important watch (Bonus points for Dragnet reference?)

Exactly how much silliness I find charming and at what point the goofiness should result in some sort of deduction for review purposes are questions I find myself thinking about a lot while watching Grimm. Even the episodes I’ve scored as “A”s have their Moments. And if I had to sum up my feelings about “Game Ogre” I would say that it starts as a fine enough monster of the week story but then, perhaps fittingly for an episode that prominently features a watch early on, it accumulates enough “complications” that it becomes genuinely interesting or noteworthy.

First—the central role of Oleg Stark, an ogre. I did love the very physical performance, which has a lot of stiff-bodied stomping around and grunting and growling. It had to have been fun to try to play that role and to try to make yourself seem as big, burly, and dense (in more than one sense) as possible. The way the camera frames this big boy and the way that shots of him getting physical are filmed and edited to make him feel as large and powerful as possible is just very entertaining. Definitely goofy, but also definitely fun in a C+ sort of way.

Another entertaining C-sort of goofy detail is how the initial murder victim is a judge, and we know that because he’s just got a gavel sitting out on his desk at home. It’s used in his murder to help suggest that the crime was personal, of course, but the placement is still such a ridiculous way to communicate the man’s profession, especially when you consider that we’re also explicitly told he’s a state judge when Sergeant Wu and his partner are investigating the scene of the break-in.

There are some similarly unnecessary-feeling, awkward quick flashbacks in the mix—back to Nick being brutalized by the ogre in his house and to the ogre-killing poison and gun in his trailer. Of course, one way of looking at these is as part of the TV series package: Commercials are a thing, and people come in late. You have to catch up the late-comers and maybe re-establish a sense of drama and of the critical details for folks after the ads. This is one of those things I struggle to identify as a positive or a negative in my subjective assessment since Grimm being so obviously What It Is is absolutely part of the charm and was part of what I wanted out of this whole experience.

And there are a couple of plot oddities here, too, like just how long it takes for someone (Wu) to put together the idea of using Hank as bait for the vengeance-seeking Oleg. Captain Renard going along with Hank to a suspect’s place probably shouldn’t feel weird, but it does since, as far as I remember, this is new behavior for him.

It’s the mounting “complications” that ultimately elevate the episode, though, because of their novelty. Actually seeing Nick kind of shaken and vulnerable after he’s hospitalized from Oleg’s attack offers a new emotional angle from which to view him. He hasn’t been this badly beaten by a Wesen before. Hank similarly gets pushed emotionally in this episode, and the exact nature of the strain on him ends up being a nice twist, with how he and the DA colluded to “lose” evidence that might have gotten reasonable doubt for Oleg at his trial years ago.

The trust that Nick places in Monroe, a Wesen, by revealing the trailer to him is very much understated and great for it. The fact that Monroe ends up being the one who has to put Oleg down is also a cool, interesting wrinkle. The focus on the .600 caliber “elephant gun” bullets that are over 100 years old in the final scene with Renard and Hank is just a delightful little bit of quirkiness and suspense. That the weapons from the trailer are actually deployed here is something I was glad to see. It certainly makes sense for Nick to use his service weapon rather than swinging around a sword or flail or something, but that armory has been essentially teased up to this point, and it was just good to see some of it put to use.

#nbc grimm #tv series #review #rewatch

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lorillee · 2 months ago

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alright well i finished ch 12 so while im waiting for my water to boil ill fill everybody in on the current thoughts feelings opinions

Can we kill sagawa. PLEASEEEEE If this man doesnt die by the end of the game we have done something deeply and unfathomably wrong.

anyways so im fascinated at the reveal of tachibana as the owner of the bat tattoo and honestly Well i cant say i trust it. just because its very much like well frankly a bit of a shock reveal when it happens with no real justification. Like there was legitimately no reason to show this to the viewers at that point in the story so im smelling some sort of a fakeout here is basically what im getting at

like one could argue that they decided to reveal it there because we’ve spent the past bit trying to establish tachibana as a guy we can count on to some extent and then immediately after reminding the viewer “Hey we are dealing with organized crime LOL these people are actually deplorable and dont u forget it” keeps everybody on their toes or whatever but i still feel like they couldve chosen a more shocking or relevant moment. Hence my fakeout theory which i will honestly be a bit disappointed in if true because it just seems a little cheap

anyways so currently im thinking that like as part of his little mafia squad they all got the same tattoo or somethjng and so its actually a different guy with the bat tattoo. wait omg could you imagine if it was oda LOL

Ok if it was oda i would forgive the fakeout. Because i never really liked that dude to begin with

insanely funny how happy people are to volunteer incredibly sensitive information to majima when this has basically no benefit to them and in fact will probably come back to bite them in the ass. Its just his charming babygirl vibes

the ending for the Everybody Wants To Kill Kiryu subplot was a bit anticlimactic for all the drama we went through so jury is still out on how i feel about this because its like obviously important for the whole tojo family infighting but at the moment im not sure if i felt like this entire thing was really worth taking up like 2 slash 3 whole chapters for. but who knows bc we havent seen this story to its end yet

unsure about how i feel about the direction they r possibly taking majima and mikotos relationship in. if they choose to play this as a “what could have been if things were different” doomed potential romance u know i eat that stuff up But the point of issue here is potential. bc my immersion is going to be going to be struggling if they seriously try to argue me into believing that they r totally In Love despite the fact that they barely know each other at this point. so We Shall See

CAN WE KILL SAGAWA PRETTY PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEE

#lorillee plays y0

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kek623 · 3 months ago

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The Gut-Wrenching Experience of Watching "How to Make Millions Before Grandma Dies"

The movie How to Make Millions Before Grandma Dies is a 2024 Thai comedy-drama directed by Pat Boonnitipat. The story is centered around a young man who one day decides to move into his ailing grandmother’s home to help around and act as a caretaker for her, hoping to secure her fortune before she passes. However, he soon realizes that his goals are going to be more difficult to achieve as he attempts to navigate through his family’s dynamics and win his grandmother’s favor. The tension between the commitment to family and the internal resistance was so real, and it pulled me into the story, making me feel a sense of connection to the characters' struggles.

Watching How to Make Millions Before Grandma Dies made me go through such a whirlwind of emotions, ranging from frustration to heartbreak. The story began with a family visiting their ancestors’ graves. As the movie unfolded, I found the main character, M, quite infuriating because of his behavior towards his grandmother, Sew. He did what he was tasked with lousily, sat down, and proceeded to ignore his family’s reprimands, making his grandmother Sew do the work for him. I couldn’t understand how someone could be so detached from the obvious care their grandmother needed. It was infuriating to watch him ignore his responsibility, and it reminded me of times when I’ve seen people disregard their own family members, letting selfishness take over.

When grandmother Sew fell and ended up in the hospital, I was furious with not only M for refusing to get involved but also with the rest of the family—M’s uncles in particular—for leaving the hospital early. It was then revealed that Sew had cancer. The family agreed to shield her from knowing about her diagnosis and to not mention anything about it, which I thought was a questionable choice—I personally am not in favor of their decision. The family thinks they are making the right decision by hiding the truth when all they are doing is showing denial and avoidance, and to me, it only seems selfish.

In a later scene, during the funeral of M’s grandfather, M soon found out that almost all that the grandfather had left was given to M's cousin, Mui, because she was his caretaker. This information was what motivated M to move into his grandmother Sew’s home and take care of her himself. However, he eventually proved himself to somehow be even more selfish by telling his grandmother about her diagnosis. It was an unexpected moment, and his bluntness made me want to scream. On one hand, it felt like a betrayal of his mother’s wishes, but on the other, it may have been one of the most honest things he did in the entire film. I was torn between pitying him and still being so frustrated by his apparent lack of compassion. I do believe that Sew had the right to know, however. I thought that M made the right decision by telling her about her diagnosis, but looking back after finishing the movie, he probably only told her for his convenience.

As the movie progressed, M seemed to become more willing to help his grandmother around. This took me by surprise, as I was not expecting such behavior from him, especially with the first impression he had on me. M’s slow transformation was filled with bittersweet moments. The small, tender moments, like selling congee together, felt fragile and precious. Still, there was a lingering question of whether his actions were driven by genuine care or ulterior motives that kept me in a state of suspicion about his character.

M’s uncles were constantly on my nerves. Soei specifically would always cause a headache for me every time he appeared in the movie. He did not have a job, would constantly get arrested, and would rely on his mother, Sew, to bail him out. The last time he visited, he was caught stealing his mother's savings, and he would often visit while drunk. Not to mention, he owes his mother one million baht, and that in itself is such a bizarre amount that it’s unforgivable in my perspective. As for Kiang, the other uncle, he would barely visit his mother, and even if he did, he would leave as early as he could because of his own family duties. Kiang in general seemed disinterested in his mother’s life, despite the fact that she was already in a very bad state. Only M’s mother and M himself were the only ones to show even the slightest bit of genuine concern for grandmother Sew, but even that makes me sad—to think that only one of the three children M’s grandmother had cared enough to sacrifice more than just time for her.

As the family became more and more distant, everyone started visiting grandmother Sew less. Sundays that would fill their home with laughter had become quiet. Despite how M was slowly starting to mature and realize the sacrifices his grandmother had made for their family, everyone was either too busy or was not in the best state for them to visit. I was both sad and frustrated with all of the family members for being so selfish. It had come to the point in the movie where M’s grandmother had become bald from her chemotherapy. She would appear so sad every time her hair would fall off, but M would always manage to cheer her up. It would sadden me every time Sew would mention things that imply her death, because it would constantly remind me of my own loved ones who have passed.

With the hospital bills getting higher and higher, Sew had to resort to asking her older brother for money. After a heartfelt scene where Sew and her older brother were singing together and hugging, it cut to the scene where she eventually had to explain why she needed the money. This caught me so off guard because throughout the movie so far, grandmother Sew has been nothing but selfless and has never asked for anything from her family. To me, it felt out of character for her to ask for money, but then again, she was running out of options, which makes the whole situation more sad than it should be. In the end, the elderly siblings only ended up arguing and bickering because of the older brother’s refusal to give Sew any money. This made me angry. I couldn’t understand how you could refuse to do the littlest favor for your younger sibling, who is terminally ill. My anger amplified after Sew mentioned how her older brother was the one who always got what he wanted. It all seemed so unfair for grandmother Sew that I was just sitting, confused and frustrated, while watching all of this unfold.

Another visit to the hospital revealed that grandmother Sew’s conditions were not improving in the slightest. M tried lying at first, telling her that she'd be okay. It was devastating and heartbreaking to watch this entire scene. Eventually, grandmother Sew caught on to the reactions of both her daughter and her grandson. She then reached out her hands to both of them to hold theirs. I was barely holding any tears in anymore as M was showing genuine concern for his grandmother in this scene. Everything was so expected, and yet the emotional impact of each scene is just as strong every time I look back on the movie.

That night, M woke up to his grandmother Sew whimpering in her bed. She was begging the gods, goddesses, and her family above to take her. It was a triggering scene for me to see, as I have heard the same things said by my great-grandfather, who had recently passed. No matter how many times I repeat this scene, whether physically or just in my head, it never fails to make me cry. I felt so bad for grandmother Sew.

Even with Sew’s conditions, her family was still bickering about whatever there was to bicker about. It was always such a headache to see them argue because it always felt like walls talking to each other. None of them listened to each other, and it was so frustrating to watch because I know what that kind of arguing is like. Eventually, after grandmother Sew’s house was sold, M invited her to live with them, and thankfully, she accepted. Kiang and Soei finally visited after a while. M helped them both realize the sacrifices grandmother Sew had made for them. Still, I was bitter at the fact that they only visited when her conditions worsened.

The climax of the movie—where M sings to his grandmother as she’s passing away—was utterly heartbreaking. The buildup of his emotional distance, finally breaking down into raw, genuine tears, left me sobbing. I couldn’t properly process whatever thoughts I was having during this scene, as all I could feel was his regret, his sorrow, and his guilt for all the times he was absent emotionally. It was a lot to take in, especially because M, someone who has barely shown such emotion the entire film, seemed so vulnerable in this moment. He was crying and singing with such a shaky voice, and that was what made me confirm that this movie had emotionally ruined me.

Just before grandmother Sew’s funeral, M received what seemed to be the phone call of a lifetime. It was then revealed that Sew had been constantly depositing money into a bank account that belonged to M. This was another one of those gut-wrenching scenes, as the film revealed this by showing a flashback of grandmother Sew promising M to deposit money in his bank account until she dies. It was such a devastating final blow that tied together the title and the entire theme of the movie. The accumulation of both her love and her money felt like a symbolic passing of not just material wealth but the wisdom and compassion that M had been so blind to for much of the film.

The last thing M did for his grandmother was buy him the big plot of land for her grave, something Sew asked for earlier in the movie. It was so sad for me to see how M was swinging from smiling and crying on the way to her grave. This movie has such an emotional chokehold on me as it made myself swing between humor, frustration, and gut-wrenching sadness. It did not hesitate to showcase the complexity of family dynamics and made me reflect on my own family relationships. I do not think that I will be able to get over this film for a while. M’s journey to emotional maturity was difficult to watch, but it served as a reminder that family, no matter how flawed, is worth cherishing while we still have time.

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