#malombra's chatter

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

"people who smoke are idiots" i used to think but right now i'm realizing that i was wrong because i learned what the difference between stupidity and willful ignorance is. what if you don't care about the consequences if you feel like there's no future anyways.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

I think we need to stop trying to appeal to politicians' sense of pity/compassion or trying to vote them out and just start telling them to kill themselves. enough insistence from enough people will yield results.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

i am back in here to do some petty little venting after recovering from the folly which overtook me in my first post. i am a changed man, fuck cops, i knew this blog would have come in handy again. >:] but that's not the topic of this post.

it's rather a masterpost for my own convenience of something a person in my life (well. in my discord friend list, but they are there in my life in a way) has been doing, we will dub them as E.. I do not expect anyone to see this, but if you do, good for you! have some tea and an admittedly poorly baked cookie overloaded with butter while you're here. :] more beneath the cut, but be aware, it's sort of long.

also, this is in no way a callout post, just- again- personal documentation. my memory is bad and i need to compile the things they have done, or else i will not be able to remember when i need it. in this post i will default to they/them pronouns for everyone as an extra safety measure of sorts.

me and E. began speaking on tumblr, before moving on to discord, where they joined some servers i was in as well. in one instance they were kicked due to being disliked by most of the staff and some members, which was understandable since it was a majority and E. did not seem to make a big deal out of it. i simply chalked it up to them not fitting in with my friends well, but i've come to see that maybe it's not that much of an "us" problem anymore. we have had our disagreements and they were mostly about minor things relating to fandom stuff and such, which were of course resolved peacefully, but after a while of knowing them they exhibited some,, glaring flaws.

E. appears to be completely tone-deaf and lacks quite a bit of self-awareness, not seeing when they make others uncomfortable, not knowing what is an appropriate thing to do and what is not (more on that in a later point), misreading the tone of messages and misinterpreting things people say. it would not be that bad in and of itself, it could easily be resolved with a bit of communication and the use of tone tags if it was just that, but there's also a bit more.

they tend to be a bit man-splain-y, if that makes sense? stating the obvious as if others won't get it by themselves and such. again, annoying and awkward, but nothing to lose it over.

they are misinformed about certain mental disorders such as DID or delusions (apologies if i get any of those terms wrong). once again, a forgivable mistake, but they seem to not have done their research at all yet. i do not know for sure, but had they at least tried to, they wouldn't talk about it the way they do. they very much come off as condescending or judgemental, the former in servers and the latter in dms. and. in servers as well to an extent, but i am not inclined to provide screenshots for privacy reasons.

they have consistently showed up in my dms to shit-talk the mods in a server i own. i am not in the position to call out shit-talking behavior as- it is what i was doing up until about half an hour ago as of writing this, but there's that. i can understand why they would do that, i too am culpable of talking about the people i dislike behind their backs, but. they act as if the other mods would be making me uncomfortable/overall be unpleasant while E. has been the one to cause consistent unease in the servers they were in with me. again, lack of self-awareness and all that.

when one of my friends, which we will name N., shared a selfie in one of my servers, they reverse google searched it to look for more of N.'s social media accounts. i know this because E. dm'd me about it as if it were a normal thing, which is. appalling. i initially thought i was overreacting as i tend to do and did not mention it to N. (fully my mistake, even if it was out of concern for their mental wellbeing), but as i discussed it with another friend i realized that- hey maybe i wasn't fucking overreacting- and decided to tell N.. me and another mod have settled on banning E. from the server once i get a reply from N., to avoid it happening again. now i know E. might have done that to like.. prove that N. is a real person, internet safety and all that, but i still don't. think that was an ok thing to do.

i am afraid of how N. will react to this, that being why i hid it from them before. i fear it will cause them to panic badly, but i realized that hiding it from them any further would be.. unloyal, for lack of a better word? just flat-out bad? either way, i'm doing it now and that is what counts. i hope this goes well.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

"don't headcanon real cis men as transfem" HOW ABOUT DON'T HEADCANON REAL PEOPLE AT ALL. IF THEY'RE NOT GOING TO LISTEN TO THE REASONS WHY THEY SHOULDN'T HEADCANON REAL PEOPLE, THEY WON'T LISTEN TO YOUR OTHER ARGUMENTS EITHER.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

cold war 2.0 boys lets go. all i can do is hope that the americans get fed up enough to riot and the next one to step up doesnt deliberately try to end humanity for the sake of money

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

sensibilization about climate change only does so much. i am tired of hearing it and i want to see some concrete action. i want to see celebrities' planes be sabotaged. i want to see occupied government buildings. i want to toss a brick through someone's window and know that it will do something for my future there's been enough sensibilization, enough protests, i think we should start with the riots stop being scared and start being angry because these people won't care unless we start damaging the property and riches they love so much.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

i cant even say "i want to ditch society and go live in the woods" because the woods are fucking burning

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

hm! I do wonder why cishet male politicians don't want women to be able to have abortions in case of rape. surely these honest and upright men wouldn't want that for their own convenience in case they ever were to commit such a crime. 🤔

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

my brain is preemptively playing "another one bites the dust" rn

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

pure, unfiltered hedonism. enjoy this while we're not at war yet.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

oh christ im so scared I dont want anything to happen to my family

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

"war that could have devastating effects on all of europe" "the planets only got a handful of years left" "the job markets declining" there really is no end in sight huh.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

whether i am spilling tears because of my cold or beacause of this is beyond me but. goddammit this is why i don't fucking talk there it always ends up poorly one way or another it's like walking a fucking mine field

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

warning for talk of pr0-sh1pp1ng (censor so it doesn't show up in the tag or else I'm gonna get more grown ass people moaning at me because I huwt theiw feewings) and p.doph.lia I'm on mobile and can't put a read more cut

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i stg [fandom name redacted] is the only fandom I've been into so far where i have to check a person's account to make sure that the cute art they made of two characters isn't meant to be ship like there's always this underlying dread that other than drawing this kid doing smth nice with their adult friend/parent figure they also draw them in romantic or even sexual situations because that's a perfectly normal thing to do that's totally not, most of the time, aimed at grooming minors /sar

it's just. frustrating. I want to indulge in my interests but knowing that the people behind my favorite art of my favorite character think that shipping him and his adult best friend is fine and dandy and will have no ripercussions on real minors in the real world fucking sucks. I really don't want to risk giving them any more exposure.

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

i was on tiktok just now and i saw this video showcasing the user's paint mixing process and they briefly explained what a paint muller was and they said "it's not always necessary but know you guys like it so i try to include it" and i know it's most likely just a matter of likes and shares and stuff but it sounds so caring, even if i know it likely isn't, and it got to me, for some reason /pos

it's so silly but the thought of someone doing something for someone else just because they like it, in any context, never fails to make me happy

[throwaway-account-of-a-dead-man]

i was just ignored. it hurts a little bit but it's fine.