#make a stupid ass post on this stupid ass website
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think I might be going through a depressive episode AND my birthday is a in a few days...
COINCIDENCE???
#personal bs#ignore me just rambling#yea probably honestly#like...only tangentially related probably tbh#like...not about the getting older#i'm kinda past that point other than my body is just...so bad#but like...y'know it's whatever it's a number i don't really care#it's just everything else#and how when it's your birthday all the sudden people give a shit about you#and treat you like you're special 'cause 'it's your special day'#like...there are so many other days of the yr you could choose to be nice to me#but sure...ONLY ever pick this one goddamn day#like for the last several yrs i always joke once it reaches march#like 'ohhh it's my birthday month everyone! be nice blah blah blah'#but then like the closer it gets to my actual birthday i just DREAD it#and i think this is actually the most i've dreaded a birthday in a long fucking time#like i hate that i can't even halfass enjoy it#i've just been crying on and off for the last several hours#it's almost 5:30 am and i should go to bed#but i'm trying to calm down a bit before#so decided to do my classic...#make a stupid ass post on this stupid ass website#that no one will read and will never be interacted with#which is...fine whatever i get it#not saying this to shame anyone into reaching out#just stating facts#but typically just...typing it out helps me feel a bit better#which is the main goal#on the off chance someone is reading all these tags...thanks for reading i guess#i'm fine i'll be fine
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the corner of 1st and 9th
summary: you've given a little too much information to your favorite barista... not that it matters, when he already knows.
word count: 3k
-> warnings: stalking . he is unwell guys
-> gn reader (you/yours) is a hot drink enjoyer . mb
taglist: @samarill || @sarienic || @valeriele3 || @shizunxie || @boba-is-a-soup || @yuus3n || @esthelily || @turningfrogsgay || @cupandtea24 || @genshin-impacts-me || @chaoticfivesworld || @raaawwwr || @ryuryuryuyurboat || @undrxtxd || @rainswept || @wanderersqt || @rozz-eokkk
< masterlist >
reasons to NOT think that he is stalking you:
you tap your pen on the corner of your paper, eyes glancing between your writing and the clock. there’s no sound but the intermittent ac and the chatter of voices from the common room, a group of your dormmate’s friends that you’re not keen on interacting with. it’s a reminder of the fact that you’re assuredly spending too much time locked up in your room thinking about this, but you can’t stop. you haven’t been able to stop thinking about it, about him.
thoma was a normal barista at an innocuous cafe. and he was definitely, assuredly not stalking you… right?
you go there fairly often
the estate was a dimly unpopular cafe set right near your dorms, perfectly on the way to most of your classes and not too far out of the way if you wanted a quick bite. despite clearly being a family business, it had managed to partner with the university, and accepted the meal plan you were forced to buy. given its proximity to you and the fact that the other options got rather repetitive, you frequented the small shop. it was never too crowded, so it wasn’t impossible to assume that you were one of the few regulars.
there were exactly two consistent baristas that worked there, with the occasional new face only ever showing for a few days. there was no set uniform, as far as you could tell. one was a young girl, likely another student, who constantly yawned and always had to push up her sleeves to work the register. she didn’t talk much; the one time you had complimented her sweater, she looked at you like you were a raccoon that had waltzed in and tried to pay with cash.
the other was the object of your paranoia: thoma, a chatty redhead who always seemed to drag out the conversation longer than he had to. he didn’t wear a name tag, but did introduce himself after you gave your name for your order, like you were meeting as friends and not in a mercantile exchange. when he handed you your receipt, there was a doodle of a dog in a suit at the bottom wishing you a good day.
your schedule was rather uneven, what with waxing and waning stress and assignments and the various misaligned tests you had to take. but still, you had credits to burn and their menu was solid, so you came back whenever you wanted.
2. he’s just being nice
thoma was an occasionally odd guy, but not overtly strange. he smiled and said hello and goodbye in the regular tone someone in customer service would, provided they were either really enthusiastic about their job or desperately trying not to get fired. he wore a plain black tee and jeans and despite the silver tags around his neck, never really screamed ex-military. he seemed rather young to be deployed anyway…
regardless, he was still just a normal guy. it was normal to memorize someone’s order if they came back so often, right? normal. it was normal to ask why you looked tired, or what had happened if you were in a better mood, or to wish you luck if you were about to head to class.
he was a normal, nice guy. he never made a big deal if you came in near closing time—in your defense, their hours seemed to shift from week to week—and still recited your usual back to you in case it had changed.
it never did. his smile was proud whenever you said so.
he was forgiving, from what you could see. whenever another staff member made a mistake, or if a customer dropped something, or if a funny looking bird flew by the window and he spilled whatever he was holding, he was quick to laugh it off. he laughed a lot, actually. rarely was any visit when he was working devoid of it, whether loud and excited or quietly amused. when he wasn’t, he wore an easygoing grin, the kind that implicitly forgave you for tripping over your words or the rug by the front door. he worked quickly and quietly and sometimes you’d find you were given a discount “just because.”
3. you’re probably overthinking things.
the problem had started around the same time midterms did.
the attendees at the tables grew sparser, busy studying or sleeping or praying. there were days when you’d walk in and be the only one there, aside from whoever was at the counter that day. when you walked in, you had just enough time to see the deep frown etched on thoma’s face before it slipped away, customer service smile back on his face.
you debated over whether to ask the entire time you waited. it was the polite thing to do, wasn’t it? it wasn’t as if you were friends, but still. if someone’s sad, you ask why. that’s the normal thing to do..
he still called your name, despite you being the only one there. how did this place stay afloat? surely there was some bigger chain willing to pay the rent. the middle of a college campus was the best spot for a place selling caffeine..
now that you thought about it, why was this place so quiet?
you shook it off and went to pick up your drink, finding a small pastry there instead. you blinked, looking up to correct him, but he was already looking at you with the same smile as always.
“they’re going to go out of date soon,” he explained, “and we over-ordered, anyway. take as many as you want!”
…odd. this didn’t look like a new building. did they not know business slowed around this time?
but not too far out of order. you took the freebie, waited a few minutes longer for your drink, and went on your day.
reasons TO think he is stalking you:
he knows where you are
you, like everyone else, had assignments due, and tests to get to. your free time dwindled to a select few naps, and your, like everyone else’s, trips to the cafe slowed to a stop.
and yet, the next time you visited, he knew.
he knew.
you dragged yourself through the doors on a spur of whim, determined to reward yourself for making it through the past few weeks. god, you were tired. you blinked the exhaustion from your eyes long enough to find the barista on shift; thoma, as usual, greeted you with a smile.
“welcome back! same as usual?”
you nodded, digging through your wallet, but instead of punching in your order as usual, he reached behind him, setting down a to-go cup in front of you.
it was still steaming.
you froze, the sight settling into your exhausted mind, unable to even force your hands to pay.
why the fuck did thoma know you were coming back today?
you didn’t even know you were coming. this was an impulse, an idea you barely thought through.
after what you can only assume is too long, he lets out a laugh. not nervous, or uncomfortable, but the same casual laugh as when he spills something while someone’s watching. your eyes find his, easygoing and bright.
“i hope you’re not too surprised,” he starts, like you’re not keenly aware of every beat of your heart. “i just figured you should get some rest as soon as possible.”
is it worse, you wonder, if he just made the same drink every day until you came back and simply got lucky? that’s the only answer that doesn’t involve you calling student services, but even that makes your skin crawl. you pay as fast as you can and grab the drink, rushing the rest of the trip back to your dorm.
it went cold on your desk, too unnerving to ever take a sip of.
2. he knows your schedule
it took… a lot of mental energy to force yourself back to the estate. you didn’t even want to go, not really, but the other options nearby either didn’t take school credits or simply tasted worse. you didn’t know what it was, but it was always off. too strong, too weak, with an odd aftertaste. it was a different problem every time, one that wore down your resistance.
nothing was better than a (technically not) free pick-me-up. you had all these credits anyway, you might as well use them on something you actually liked, right?
it’s not like you were known for making good decisions, okay? maybe… maybe it was just a fluke? maybe you could ask him about it. there’s even a chance that it’s not him working the counter!
…yeah, not a chance. a quick glance inside shows the same bright copper hair as always… though the girl is at the register this time, and he’s in the back. there’s only a handful of other people inside, so you’re probably fine.
you walked in, the bell ringing, a few patrons looking up on instinct. the girl at the register does the same right as thoma abandoned the order he was working on, tapping her on the shoulder. “sayu, let me handle this one, okay?”
great. sayu, apparently, looks at you with what you can only describe as pity, shrugging and returning to the back counter. you stood a bit further from the counter than normal, but thoma still continued to smile.
“hey there! your usual?”
he looked so normal. you couldn’t ignore how pleasant his smile was, how easily he waved like he wasn’t the reason you stayed up until the sun rose, unable to look away from the cup on your desk. it almost annoyed you, knowing he probably didn’t even think about it. so you grabbed that irritation, twisted it into words, and pushed it through your teeth; “how did you know when i was going to come here?”
for a moment, his smile faltered. his laugh was quieter, nervous, nothing like before. he shrugged, pushing up the bandana around his forehead, green eyes avoiding yours. “ah, lucky guess?”
you’re a lot of things. stupid is.. probably on that list, given your presence here, but you’re not stupid enough to believe him about that. to his credit, he seems to recognize that, shoulders slumping with a sigh.
“okay, that’s a lie. i’m sorry.” he shakes his head, as if chiding himself for trying. “one of my friends happened to see you, and he said you looked upset. i thought you might appreciate the thought…?”
yeah, you might, if that wasn’t a fucking insane thing to do.
he looks sheepish enough, or as much as one can when it’s clear he doesn’t actually feel bad for what he did.
“…don’t do it again. it’s weird.”
it’s comical, how much he brightens, standing straighter like a flower finally put in the sun. “of course! if you don’t mind the wait, then i’m not complaining.”
that should have been it. you paid, you waited, and though sayu is the one that makes your drink it’s thoma that called you up to the counter. it’s a constant, at this point, same as your order and the chipper grin as he handed you your drink instead of leaving it there, a wax bag in his other hand.
“take this as an apology,” he explains, “i really didn’t mean to unnerve you.”
sure. you’re willing to believe that, if only for the sake of normalcy. you took both, the warmth easing your tense hands.
he lingered. he always did. he stood, and waited, and when he had enough of your staring, he spoke. “if there’s anything else i can do, just let me know. i could even give you my notes to study, if you want! i know you’ve got a test coming up.”
you’re learning to hate his smile. it’s so easy, his words soft and fluid with a genuine curiosity that sent chills across your skin.
there’s the possibility that he just also attends school. you’re aware of that. you swallowed your fear and managed the breath to ask what you really, really didn’t want to know. “do you also have ms yae?”
if you had access to a time machine… well, you’d stop yourself from ever stepping foot in the estate to begin with. but if you couldn’t do that, you’d come back to that instant, and keep yourself from ever asking such a stupid question.
some things were better unsaid. never did you understand that more than when thoma replied, eyes as sharp as a blade of grass.
“of course not. but you do, don’t you?”
you put your pen down, the ink from your anxious tapping now covering most of the upper corner of the page.
you hate it. you hate it. you hate that you wrote his name willingly, you hate that you’re so shaken by something you could have easily avoided, you hate that your life has taken such a turn.
you should have just stayed gone. you’ve stopped now, but now he knew you were stuck here for this semester. leaving mid-term would wreak havoc on your transcript, let alone your grades or schedule or however you were supposed to find another college to attend on such short notice.
you refocus on your list. objectively speaking, there’s more reasons to think this is normal, but the downside of lists like this is that they failed to fully capture the way your heart had dropped that day.
it was a month ago. a month, and you haven’t been able to stop looking over your shoulder whenever you went outside. you should really just call someone…
would student services be open at this hour?
you dig through the school’s website for a bit, but only find an address and a phone number for the department head. what “department” this falls under, you’re not sure, and you’re not keen on making a call less than an hour before midnight, so you don’t ask either. no dice. not for a few hours, at least. it’s just you, not really alone in your dorm, both because of the phantoms in your periphery and the fact that the walls are thin, letting you hear the cheers and disappointment of whatever game they’re playing in the common room.
it’s a bit of an anchor. the world is still going to turn, after all, and you need to be ready to meet it; you need to rest. being on edge for so long is wearing you down, and the weight on your shoulders will only grow if you keep sitting here. after a moment to consider the paper, you rip the list of your worries into short shreds, dumping the remains into the trash. you stand, stretch, and begin to tidy up, plugging in your phone and reaching for your water bottle, only to find it empty. you must have forgotten to refill it in your panic.. you look to the door, mentally weighing the benefits of going out and refilling it. there’s people in the common room, and you’re not too keen on being looked at right now, but it’s not as if they’re the ones plaguing you. it’s a common room for a reason, and filling it now will reduce the number of things to do tomorrow morning.
in search of a blessing for your future self, you unlock and open your door, the voices getting louder. some are familiar, but you shelve the memories. you have a mission. you unscrew the cap as you walk, aiming for the small kitchenette against the wall. archons willing, you won’t even have to interact with anybody. you walk, avoiding their eyes and even doing a rather good job at it, in your opinion. you fill your bottle, lingering just long enough to get the cap on without spilling anything, and turn to leave.
in a moment of weakness, you glance at the tv. there’s some sort of pvp game going on, with both players and bystanders crowded around the lone couch, most watching the ebb and flow of victory in earnest.
most, except one. on the floor, hands neatly in his lap, is the last person you want to see. he’s missing his bandana, but he still has that same smile, one gloved hand raised in a familiar wave.
you don’t think about what he’s said or done. you don’t think about the fact that you definitely should have told your roommates not to let him in. no, all you can think about is the fact that he now knows where you live, right down to the suite number.
it takes a lot of effort to drag your eyes away, pulling your feet into the dorm. you don’t want to think about how much effort it will take to leave tomorrow.
you don’t want to think about what could be waiting for you.
#genshin#genshin impact#genshin x reader#gender neutral reader#thoma#genshin thoma#thoma x reader#x reader#genshin impact x gender neutral reader#genshin x you#yandere genshin impact#yandere thoma#<- is that not a popular tag#guys. i'm disappointed in you#yan thoma . the potential . do you not Get him . guys#yandere#oh i gotta uhhh#tw stalking#stay safe out there kids . please god call 911 if this ever happens to you holy shit#fun fact this post is like 8hrs late bc i was busy being homo abt . god so many people guh#kamisato ayato the man that you are holy#btw . it was initially written that you dorm w a kamisato twin but w the Gender stuff involved there it would have been really clunky;#and their personalities are so different that would have been awkward too so . this is a secret for you tag readers out there. thumbs up .#stupid fucking tag character limit let me YAP . freak ass website#this is such a lukewarm post im sorry . in my defense . i dont have one mb#what is it abt the kamisato estate that makes everyone inside it insane and also so edible#i need to crunch him like glass
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Did you hear of the news?
I have. :(
Everyone else has their tributes so, here, a summary of my experience with Dragon Ball.
I was in fourth grade art class. A kid had the February 2005 issue of Shonen Jump, back when Shonen Jump was still physically printed here. I recognized Atem on the front cover because the Blockbuster around the corner from our house had DVDs (I think they were DVDs and not VHSs then since I distinctly remember it having a menu and special features) of some of the later episodes of Duelist Kingdom and my brother and I watched them on repeat. So I was like oh, hey, what's this? They make books of that stuff? I don't remember the conversation but the kid ended up giving me that issue, and I took it home with me.
There were a LOT of significant, groundwork things happening in that issue, now that I think about it. We were just beginning to see Sanji truly in action against Pearl. The Dark Tournament was in it's early stages still with Roto fucking around and finding out against Kurama. Sakura shears off her hair in a move that rearranged sexualities the world over. The reason Atem was on the cover was because Yu-Gi-Oh Millennium World was just debuting its first and second chapter. Bleach wasn't even serialized yet. And Dragon Ball, of course, was also there, about a hundred and fifty chapters ahead of everybody else.
Keep in mind that this was my first experience with manga, period. So my very first experience with Dragon Ball opened on this:
and ended on this:
Yeah. Truth be told, at the time Yu Yu Hakusho piqued my interest more than Dragon Ball (a guy fighting with plants? how creative!) but I never did forget these chapters. I thought the art style was so different from the others.
At some point after this, probably between several months and a year and a half, the TV happened to be on one evening when Toonami was airing Dragon Ball Z. Oh hey, I said, I recognize that art, I know those characters. So I hung around and watched some of episode 281. Two things about watching that episode stick with absolute crystal clarity in my mind to this day. Firstly: Buu choking Vegeta out with his arm freaked me the FUCK out as a child. I could not tell you why I had a fear reaction to it but hey, there you go. The second is this:
Specifically I remember 'You died once. If anything happens to you now, you won't exist anymore. There'll be nothing I can do to bring you back.' Not precisely word for word over the years, but Schemmel's tone of voice on this particular lineread. If I had to guess I'd say it was because at that point in my life, uh, death was kinda permanent? So wait, what do you mean died ONCE. Doesn't that apply to everyone?
This still wasn't enough to get me super invested in it though, it just didn't seem like something that would appeal to me that much. So a couple years go by, I don't think about it all that much, and then of course, TFS hits the scene and drops DBZ Abridged. So you know. As a shithead middle schooler with a shithead sense of humor I thought it was the best damn thing since sliced bread. (My biggest character flaw is that I still think a lot of Season 1 is genuinely funny)
And that was really the extent of my interaction with the franchise for the next several years. Say what you will about DBZA but they did manage to put it all together such that someone who had a nonexistent concept of what the original context was could grok it with not a lot of effort. Some time in high school, I think I was around 15, I decided to bite the bullet and read all the manga, as much to increase the funny factor of DBZA as sheerly for the sake of being able to say I had. Stick it to the other weebs, y'know. Now they can't say I didn't know anything about good anime. This was unfortunately at a time when all that was available online were dirty poor-quality scans and questionable translations, but read it I did. I went 'yep, that sure is about what I expected', and proceeded to get on with my life. GT came and went, I looked up and saw Battle of Gods coming out and went 'oh hey that's still a thing huh', kinda was peripherally aware of all the divisiveness of Super as it was happening, didn't really pay it much attention, just stuck to DBZA and quite a lot of wiki-ing.
And then, this time of year about three years ago now, in the middle of conversation with @prophecydungeon, Dragon Ball somehow came up. Something to do with 'Even though I'm not hugely into DBZ's story or whatever Toriyama does have some great character designs' (yes I was referring to Vegeta and Future Trunks at the time, no i will not stop being predictable, yes i am a parody of myself). They eventually brought up the DBS Broly movie and said, and i quote: 'that was a solid 1.5h of unbelievably fun and wacky animation'. Having seen the Gogeta vs Broly part of it on twitter and been like 'damn that animation's kinda off the hook actually, good for them good for them', my response was to be like. Oh word? I've got a spare hour and a half to kill, sure, fuck it, why not, time to watch DBS Broly.
I think that movie was precision crafted to hit me in the hyperfixation, if we're being honest. Opening on a solid 20 minutes of Lore and Worldbuilding and then having most of the rest of the runtime being mindless slobberknocker fun by way of some of the hardest animation flexes ever? I was done for.
In summation. I have been aware of Dragon Ball for a lot of my life, in that its presence was pervasive and enduring as I grew up. I may have been late to the game of actually wholeheartedly enjoying it, but enjoy it I do. Dragon Ball is the roots of a vast tree of anime, and in reading it I began to understand why that is. I respect it for that, and I love it for that. My current fixation may have shifted, but as far as time devoted to one individual thing goes... it took me a year and a half to watch my way through all of the anime and read all of the manga. ALL of it. So there's something good in there, I'd say.
#rip to a legend#text from the mod#tangentially related: i am not actually dead#it's just that between school and my job and the pirate brainrot#(the previous four months of which was feverishly consumed with a 16k word project)#i have had neither time nor impetus to make dragon ball funnies#there is also the fact that my stupid autism brain is still fuming over the website changes#that have fucked up the Aesthetique of the text posts and made them much more annoying to get in a usable form#thus adding steps to what was a simple and comfortable process#and aforementioned idiot dumb brain has not stopped pitching a bitch fit over the inconvenience.#i know it's a stupid hangup. believe me i am fully aware. but there is so little i can do about it#so i am sorry about my long absence. i really truly am.#especially to the asks that have been chillin in my inbox for all this time now#it's just that they're interesting questions that deserve me giving 100% of my brainpower to them ya feel#i want to devote appropriate attention to these little funnies and not phone it in or half ass it LOL
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i know tumblr is the home of "we piss on the poor" reading comprehension, but really, at least we're all still lightyears ahead of fucking reddit
#vent post#why am i still on that godforsaken website#home of the most ass-backwards numbskulls on the planet#me: pitbulls tend towards aggression bc of selective breeding not bc they have any actual cognitive capacity to choose evil#one of those ''KILL ALL SHITBULLS'' weirdos: you IDIOT you don't think SHITBULLS are dangerous? you want them to BABYSIT YOUR KIDS???#you fucking nincompoop i literally opened my post saying that they're aggressive. you are literally making up A Guy to be angry with rn#and note i'm being VERY generous here in assuming this is a problem in reading comprehension#and not someone who genuinely believes that dogs are capable of the moral reasoning required to comprehend good and evil#over the theory of selective breeding#which lbr. this is reddit. it's possible that this individual and his handful of upvotes ARE that dumb.#fucking cesspool of a website. when it's not being racist/queerphobic/misogynistic it's just being unbelievably stupid.
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there’s stuff i’m actually mad about re: tumblr rn and the MAIN one that pisses me off is the prev tags chain thing. like even before ‘prev tags’ took off and became a hot topic it was still common to just click back through to see other people’s tags. and while there is now a way to click back through to OPs post or the previous post by clicking the right part of the post, you can’t then go back to the blog BEFORE that one. which fucking sucks (actually i haven’t updated the app since this started and i’m using xkit on desktop so idek what state this is all in rn)
but anyway i don’t even hate it as much as other things it just makes me the angriest bc there is NO reason for it, and no reason not to listen to the userbase and switch it back. and it frustrates me when i see complaints about it on staff posts right next to complaints about tumblr live bc like… you know that’s never gonna change right?? obviously no one uses tumblr live, everyone wants to be able to turn it off permanently and not have to snooze it every week - but given all of that, i think it’s pretty clear that it’s executive-level decisions that tumblr is being made to implement?? like, the fact that there is a “snooze” option at all, to ME, says “we know none of you want this so this is how we compromised”
and similarly the fucking new viewer for pictures/gifs (why anyone thought it was a good idea to include images and gifs in this rather than just videos, i don’t know). that’s probably what i hate the most but i can see why there is pressure to do something like this and i don’t think feedback is going to make a difference. the reblog chains thing just fucking baffles me and i hate that they haven’t listened on that one - they did with the marketplace icon!!!
#such mixed feelings about this stuff bc like i so hate a lot of it and want to make that clear#but at the same time it’s like. well they do need to make money#not in a kiss ass way like omg the company needs moneyyyyyy#but like a website is run by employees. who need to be paid.#we can complain about staff all we want but they’re not gonna get any better if there’s not enough money to pay them#like ‘haha the site isn’t profitable’ is a funnie joke but literally a site needs to make money to stay online.#this is NOT me being like ummmm tumblr is a good egg and you should give them your money 🥺#i’m just like well idc if this site does some annoying shit if it means they don’t go fully offline#like the marketplace thing… yes it’s annoying and the marketing blog is weird#no i would never by tumblr merch#do i care that they are selling merch??? not really!!!#however i DO care - and this always rubbed me the wrong way since they first started selling shoelaces and color of the sky stuff#- that they are selling things based on posts. like that is content by your users that you are making money off of#just sell the stupid tumblr logo stuff it’s fine#r.txt
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has anyone figured out a way to engage in their interests, without feeling shame? asking for a friend
#my ass being like ‘oh i’m sad bc i’m not engaging in my interests and if i do that i’ll feel better’#but then i try that and just feel a mass amount of shame over being passionate#and i feel like a little kid again#but the person bullying me is me#coming back on here and tryin to engage in succ/tomgreg posting#and it feels dumb and then it makes me sad#which is basically why i don’t post anymore bc i just think ‘i’m a stupid dumbass loser’#yeah i know i’m on the stupid dumbass loser (affectionate) website#it doesn’t make me feel better#but like i don’t wanna not engage ya know?#i miss succ posting :(((#i stopped reading fic for some stupid ass reason and my brain keeps telling me to stop writing fic bc it’s stupid#but i’m obviously not gonna do that bc it’s like the one thing that makes me happy anymore#and i’d rather die than not be able to write#feels like when i was back in college and i kept masking#but like i don’t even need to mask anymore bc who the fuck cares?#i’m not surrounded by dumbass 16 yr olds anymore#and if someone actually was to bully me i’d actually probably just laugh bc it’s all just kinda pathetic really isn’t it?#but whatever i’m carrying on bc i actually don’t give a shit my brain is just a wee bitch#so maybe you’ll see me around or maybe you won’t#gwen rambles#gwenposting
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sorry to keep harping but the thing is. like. people pretty much universally have profoundly complex and richly textured lives outside of the internet. like everyone you'll ever meet will have their share of complicated relationships, personal struggles, identity issues, et cetera. and these people will likely have deep inner lives and senses of self that an outsider is not easily privy to yk. but then you get all these Posters with a superiority complex who log into the fandom blogging website, see a fandom blogger blogging about fandom, and for some reason forget that other human beings have a rich inner world and assume that this little niche interest site somehow represents the totality of the fandom blogger's life and that they can deduce some sort of damning portrait of a Life Consumed by Media from the fact that they sometimes blog about fandom on the fandom blogging website. and then they make stupid ass posts like the aforementioned. it's so pretentious and self important and mean spirited with zero substance. Banished to the salt mines for 10000 years
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Hello, Tumblr.
If you joined us before November 2022 and predominantly post on web, you will be familiar with the two post editors—the legacy editor and the “new” web editor (formerly known as the “Beta editor”).
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Beginning May 15, we’ll gradually be working to remove the legacy editor as an option for creating new posts. New posts created on web will be created in the new web editor. We hope to complete this change by July 15.
This change only affects accounts created before November 2022. Newer accounts already default to the new web editor.
This will not affect posting on the apps because we switched to this new editor on the apps about four years ago. If you use the apps, you’ve been using the new editor all this time!
This will not affect what you can include in a post, only how you get there: You can still include all the different types of media in a post, only now, you’ll do that via the new web editor’s content blocks instead of selecting a post type from the post type bar at the top of your dash. So, if you’re halfway through a text post, and you decide that what this post really needs is your pet reptile, then click on the little red image icon in the post editor, select an image, and voilà. Lizard boy steals our hearts.
If you still prefer to post on web using the legacy editor, please keep reading because the rest of this post is for you.
How can you prepare for this change?
Once we have completed this update, you won’t be able to create posts using the legacy editor. You will be able to edit posts made using the legacy editor, at least for now.
Start using the new web editor ahead of the switch. This will help you help us troubleshoot any issues you might encounter. It’ll also mean you’ll already know the ropes before the switch is final.
Talk to us. Send us feedback. Especially if you’re switching from legacy to the new web editor. We want to hear about your experience: Are there any specific workflows or features in legacy that you want to see in the new editor?
If you use a theme, make sure to check whether it supports posts made using the new web editor, and update it if that’s not the case.
For those of you trimming reblogs: @rpschtuff has created an incredibly detailed master post that gets into the nitty gritty of that practice in the new web editor.
XKitters: XKit Rewritten was explicitly designed with the new web experience in mind. This means that you will need to use XKit Rewritten when creating posts in the new web editor.
That’s all for now. Remember, you can always get in touch with us. If it’s regarding the new web editor, then Support is the place for you. If it’s about something else, @wip is your guy.
#The things I dislike about the beta editor are things y'all have already refused to change about it#no matter how much feedback I send it's not going to get me unlimited inline images#or the option to edit in raw HTML when I want a little more control over the format#or the FUCKING readmore to be a button I can choose inline rather than something I have to look up the magic fucking code to type in...#... every GODDAMN MOTHERFUCKING TIME I need to FUCKING use it#I can't see my tags in full after I add them to spell check them#Nor can I drag them around in the order - if the first one is wrong I have to delete them ALL and retype#there is even an arbitrary limit on the number of text blocks you're allowed to have in a beta editor post#and while it's not something which typically gets in the way for the kind of posts I make#if you write very long posts like fanfiction or posts with a lot of carriage returns like poetry it's coming for your ass#Tumblr staff however does not give a fuck about limiting the functionality of the website as long as it makes their jobs easier#they don't give a fuck about permabanning someone from the website who did nothing against TOS#just insulted one of them#as long as it makes their jobs easier#they're awful petty people and every ''update'' they make makes me more and more tired#I'm only still here because all my friends are#also#I wonder what random shit this update is gonna break. Stupid things go wrong around here all the time as it is - e.g. image size glitch#which is STILL AFFECTING ME btw#I wonder how many fucking load bearing coconuts there are in the legacy editor code and what exactly removing them is going to ruin#not to mention the things we KNOW will eventually break like your ability to edit posts on your own fucking blog if they're old#because who cares about backwards compatibility right? no one from 2012 could possibly still be using this website#and they certainly couldn't ever discover errors in their old posts or want to update them because their beliefs or opinions have changed#nobody cool experiences ''personal growth'' over the course of a decade that's for suckers#<- actual gymternet users opinion tbh#anyway I'm done ranting for the moment but fuck you and fuck this.
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⊹౨ৎ Perv!Yan!Nerd!Izuku ⊹౨ৎ
Thoughts/Dabble
✦ ──────── ᖭི༏ᖫྀ ──────── ✦
Warnings: small town izuku, yandere behaviors, killing mentions, sweet!reader, and really disturbing and violent acts also mentioned, stalking, stealing, watching someone without permission, taking “intimate” items, taking pictures and videos with no consent, peeping Tom izuku, just izuku being a nasty guy.
Izuku would fall for the only person that would show him some acts of kindness, you being his first target and only one after. He was a nerdy who had no confidence, everyone in town thought he was weird from a young age and now up to college. Girls knew he was creep too. People avoid him, never talking to him, not sitting near him, only ones that did just bullied him. Katsuki being one of them—
Anyway, you moved into town for college and are just the sweetest angel to him. He accidentally ran into you while running down the halls to get to class, knocking into you and falling down with you. Something was sweet, your perfume stung his nose in a pleasant way and sent jilts down his whole body. Feeling another persons heat below him got his cock already excited. So when he backed away from the person he hit, he saw you. A beautiful person who he’d never seen before.
Izuku apologize frantically afraid of another person wanting to slap him around but you never did. “Don’t worry about it,” while he picked up your things, you did the same to his stuff and hand it to him with a gorgeous smile, “no harm done.”
Freak Izuku couldn’t get you off his mind from that moment and decided to try and find you after his class…and every day after that. Izu followed you around like a shadow in the dark, if he had time he was near you. Watching everything you did.
Weeks passed and his obsession was growing out of control, skipping his lessons to break into your apartment while you’re not there. He’s take your dirty clothes while also laying on your bed, everything smelled just like you did- your underwear smelling so good. “Hmm,” he’d moan while fisting his cock with the cloths in his mouth. Pictures of you that he took from your outside window, in class or around campus was all he could look at while jerking off.
“Making you mine, wanna make you happy,” his words spilling from his mouth as he babbles on and on. And it was all true. He’d do anything for his darling, to see you laugh and smile and be worshipped like you deserve. Everyone in this stupid town was unworthy of breathing near you— he’d kill them if you want him too, take their heads, body parts and display them to you if that’s what you wanted.
He’d be your puppet for just a bit of attention.
You bet your cute little ass he has videos of you touching yourself, when you all alone in your apartment with a toy stuffing deep within you. He’s outside wondering how warm and wet you’d feel, what it would sound like if you called out his name. And you never noticed the strikes of white outside on the building near your window— you didn’t have to clean it!!
Izuku also cries to himself while masterbaiting for hours to your pictures. He was so dry but he just couldn’t stop stroking himself, you are just in his mind all the time. Naked and spread out on his bed, his sheets sticking to his sweaty body and his thighs and area around him painted white from his many rounds of cum.
Lets just hope no one finds his shrine of you in his closet. Clothes, pictures, hair and trash you threw away.
¡!Don’t repost my posts on other websites, don’t translate them, theses are for me to publish on my own!!
#‧₊˚✧.*ˋ°‧₊ Angel Writes#izuku midoriya smut#izuku midoriya x reader smut#izuku midoriya x reader#izuku midoria x reader#yandere izuku midoriya#yandere smut#yandere izuku midoriya smut#smut
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so a few weeks ago i got into this website where it gives you a color and you have to mix the paints to get it as close to the target as possible. and then people can make their own colors and post them so you can try to mix them yourself! cute right? just a fun relaxing activity. well it was. until today. until i tried to mix this generic ass shade of brown that is apparently so complicated that it almost crashed my computer several times. for reference most colors take like 5-20 paint drops to get a good balance. THIS FUCKING BROWN REQUIRES OVER 100 PAINT DROPS TO PERFECT AND IVE ONLY GOTTEN TO 98% ACCURACY. WHAT THE FUCK. i ragequit so many times but i just keep coming back bc i have to know how many fucking reds are in this color. and this is one of the ones someone posted. a human person clicked a hundred buttons to get a shade of brown and went "hm its not quite the shade of brown im thinking of." i was so full of gamer rage that i actually started looking at this persons account trying to see if i could post a comment so they would know they ruined my life. but ofc that is not a feature bc its a paint mixing site and pvp is not enabled. so ive come to make an announcement Player_63133 if i ever see you in real life its on sight. i will maul your ass. hate does not begin to describe what i feel for you and your stupid fucking brown. you should be in prison for your crimes against the innocent people of trycolors.com
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State of The Blog, February 2025, or As I Type This
CW: Politics, general downer.
I promised myself I wouldn't write about this. Guess this post makes me a liar, aside from a humble kink-maker. I also promised myself I wouldn't complain, and that I won't do. Things are fine. Texts are being written. The smut is flowing, even if slowly- or less rapidly than either of us would like, dear reader.
Now... shit sure is fucked, huh? Not the most eloquent way of putting it, I know. But who has time for rhetoric these days? And I'm not even American! But I happen to know that a large portion of my little corner o'smut here hails from the USA. I have lived there myself. I have, perhaps, something of a romantic streak when it comes to what America could be. Sadly, it's not what it could be that we have to deal with.
Things are moving quickly. This is not by accident.
As I type this, the richest man in the world has gathered an unfathomable trove of data from the US government. Illegally, of course, but it appears such things no longer matter.
As I type this, information on gender and trans issues is being erased from government websites.
As I type this, self-ID is no longer a thing for my non-binary and transgender American friends, acquaintances and readers.
As I type this, ICE is raiding workplaces, schools, churches.
As I type this, someone has lost funding for life-changing research.
As I type this. the US is getting into a trade war on three fronts. All casualties in this war will be, as is always the case, the working people. On all sides.
The casualties of all these things will not be heralded. They will not the announced or published. They will be silent, in the form of people rationing medicine they need to live, getting sick from the cold and not being able to afford a doctor, perhaps choosing to not go on anymore in a world that seems to scream in their face that they don't matter, they are not wanted, they are Other.
You are shocked and traumatized because that's the point. To shock you into paralysis, so you won't have the bandwidth or time or energy to react- your reaction is what they fear.
I am nothing important. I make stuff to get people off. What right to I have to say anything to anyone who is really suffering? What the fuck can I do? Provide some escapism? Perhaps. It is useful, insofar as burning out on doomer shit helps absolutely no one. I'm nowhere near a front line, so to speak. Perhaps I'm being delusional thinking I am contributing something worth fuck all to people, but hey, I can do delusion. Or hope. It's hard to tell them apart sometimes.
I can't tell you to fight. I can't start preaching about the importance of community. I can't tell you what to do. It's not my place, and it's not my expertise. I'm not here to play armchair resistance, and neither are you. You are here for kink, and so kink I shall give you.
But I couldn't do the State of the Blog and let this go unremarked. As futile as it may be, as stupid as it sounds (and I am aware of the ass I'm making out of myself here), I just wanted you all to know you ARE wanted, you CAN handle this. Shit is bleak. But it won't be bleak forever, because YOU won't let it. The dawn is in your hands. And when you need a break and want to read smut, I'll be here.
Oh, and before I go, just in case anyone isn't clear:
Fuck off fascists.
Fuck off transphobes.
Fuck off xenophobes.
Fuck off racists.
Fuck off real sexists.
Life is not on your side, you absolute dogfuckers. It never has been, and it never will be.
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post irrational fic pet peeve that i can’t handle (but can tough through obv) is real life factors. a character mentions listening to a song that exists irl? i don’t like it. it makes literally no sense but i can’t handle it. their asses would NOT have access to most human technology and much less websites or apps!!! “he opened Twitter-“ NO!!! MONSTERS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE FULLY ISOLATED FROM HUMANITY!!! THAT IS WHAT MAKES THEIR SITUATION SO BLEAK!!!! THEY ARE TRAPPED AND CANNOT BEG FOR HELP!!!! they HAVE their own internet system PLEASE GOD.
even if it’s in the utmv i still think they’d use a monster version. because twitter is literally just. all humans. youtube? absolutely not (but it’s one of the easier ones to stomach). human animes that fall down, sure. human vinyl records that are able to be played? alright, cool. but NOT TWITTER please god. the bad sanses would use some multiversal monster net but they’re WAR CRIMINALS they would NOT BE ABLE TO DO THAT because the stars would track them DOWN and their accounts would probably be banned. they could make an alt account with a fake persona though i guess or just be lurkers. that’s chill. but nightmare probably wouldn’t even LET THEM!!!
dream and nightmare would not care for the multiversal undernet!!! ink maybe would but he’d update once a year because he’d forget it exists and not care enough to write it down when he has a lot of other things to do!!!! swap is the only one i can genuinely realistically imagine using the multiversal undernet
AND FOOD BRANDS. “he got lays chips” THIS ISNT A FOOD COMMERCIAL AND THEY DONT EAT HUMAN FOOD AND LAYS IS A HUMAN BRAND. whatever, i get exclusively raiding/purchasing surface groceries. but would they at least go to some post true pacifist au where monster food is readily available in grocery stores??? where they can eat magic-dense food that doesn’t provide needless waste their bodies aren’t built to handle??? and wouldn’t they be MONSTER RUN BUSINESSES because they are made of magic that HUMANS DONT HAVE AND CANT HARNESS!!! AND THUS NOT HAVE LAYS FUCKING CHIPS AS A NAME. THIS ISNT AN ADVERTISEMENT. JUST SAY CHIPS. PLEASE
you know what. if you really want you can have brand foods but at least MENTION that it’s human food. and it’s possibly their only option. or maybe there’s a monster branch for it post pacifist!!! that could WORK!!! but I cannot handle “Kraft mac and cheese” NO!!!! i want to read a FANFICTION of MAGIC SKELETONS THAT DONT EXIST IN THE REAL WORLD!!!! with STUPID FICTIONAL BRANDS THAT EXIST FOR MONSTERS!!!!! THE REASON THAT FRISK IS LIKELY HEALED BY FOOD OUTSIDE OF GAMEPLAY MECHANICS IS LIKELY BECAUSE THE FOOD IS MAGIC AND ENERGY DENSE AND SERVES THE PURPOSE OT INVIGORATING RHE CONSUMER!!!!!
#oh my god#why is this so long lmfao#undertale#utmv#pet peeves#fic neg#??? maybe??#sans undertale#i guess???
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Hey whumpblr I know you love and worship writing-prompt-s but they joined the bandwagon on mass reporting Palestinian accounts
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Get 90s-ghost’s name out of your mouth; he’s human, he might make mistakes, but from what’s been shared on @ el-shab-hussein’s account, the vetting process is intense and leaves little room for deception.
I feel like most of y’all only care about Palestine when the people suffering are faceless, perfect victims, so poor and stupid and in need of a white savior they can’t possibly have their own thoughts and inner world and technology. All they should be to you is like those inspiration porn Starving Kids In Africa™.
As if them using a website they don’t know about in a language they have to machine translate and whole ass begging for donations isn’t bad enough.
Yes, there are scammers profiting off of a real time tragedy, but guess what? Guess fucking what? It’s pretty easy to check for yourself if a fundraiser is legit.
Anyways! A PSA!
You can easily check asks and fundraisers in your inbox by checking for their social media accs, which should definitely be older than their tumblr, searching their usernames on here and seeing if others have called them out, checking for their names on Strawberry Seed Collective, Operation Olive Branch, and this document, and going through their tumblr account and looking for stuff like frequent updates and news that’s not just a couple of super popular Palestinian news posts to pad out the blog length, reverse searching any pics they send, and copy pasting some of their story to see if other accounts have used their script.
Or you could also just ignore the asks either way since nobody’s can force you to donate anyways.
But don’t go out and accuse every single Palestinian on tumblr of being part of some massive fucking scam circle a lá “The Jews Are Controlling The Rich” conspiracy.
frankly, the biggest scammer is this one woman from Belgium (her first name is Laura) so I’d be wary of any based in Belgium unless you can find any other way to prove its validity.
#whumpblr#whump blog#writing prompts#writing prompt#writing ideas#writing idea#whump prompt#whump prompts#writing inspiration#writing inspo#whump tropes#whump trope#writing trope#writing tropes#whump#free Palestine#free palestine 🇵🇸#i stand with palestine 🇵🇸#donation scam#donation scams#donations#gfm scam#gofundme scam#pet whump#whump writing#whump community#recovery whump#writers on tumblr#writeblr#writing prompt s
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compliance (how to brainwash your boyfriend) — leon kennedy
author’s note: this was written with re4r!leon in mind bc that’s my boyfriend! angel said so!! i have… so many hypno ideas, some considerably more palatable and some that are Much Worse, so pls let me know if you want more! also this is based off of an audio i listened to once by everdistant-utopia on reddit! the headset concept is kind of (extremely) goofy but i was into it idk. again, i'm aware that mind control isn't real and this is a silly ass concept. i had fun doing it anyway. no leons were hurt in the making of this fic. sorry for not posting it sooner even tho it was done i was extremely embarrassed lol. pls ignore any typos. love you!! thank u!!
wc: 5k
content: sub!leon x fem!reader, afab reader, oral reader receiving, orgasm control, mention of feet for like two seconds
warning: this is dark content. please do not read if the following topics are sensitive to you: noncon, hypnosis, mind control. i dont endorse or encourage this type of behavior irl, its just a fantasy!
—
as you walk down the street, you walk by a flier that’s sitting on the sidewalk. you don’t stop to read it, but one word caught your eye. mind control. it was probably something stupid, something completely made up by some lunatic who thinks mind control is real. mind control is maybe, technically real, in the ‘just relax and close your eyes, breathe deeply and let yourself be at peace’ kind of way. definitely not the ‘put on this headset and let me rewire your brain to make you my pet’ kind of way.
but… would it really hurt to look at the flier? you turn around to see it’s still there, and, against all your better judgment, you decide to walk up to it and pick it up.
it’s dirty, wet because of the rain from last night. even still, you can read the description of the advertised product clearly, along with some more info like a website and contact info for the designers. you take a brief moment to wonder who in the hell comes up with that stuff.
introducing you to the ultra brainwasher headset 3000! perfect for all of your mind control needs! simply place the device over the subjected head and choose what you’d like to do with them. need an obedient housewife? in search of a new pet? want them to be madly in love and obsessed with you? all of that and more is possible with the ultra brainwasher headset 3000! visit our website and order the headset today!
you blink. this is insane. who would do this? who would make this? why would anyone want to make someone do any of this against their will? you feel sick to your stomach as you crumple up the flier and toss it in the nearest trash can.
because that’s… that’s not consensual. that’s wrong in every possible way. unless they gave consent to be, what, turned into an ‘obedient housewife’? that’s really what it said? there’s just no way that’s right. how is that legal to sell? what even was that flier doing?
this feels like the kind of thing that would be sold on the black market, not openly advertised to people on the street. what if some lunatic saw it and just started brainwashing people? no one could stop them, it’s not exactly a crime in and of itself, and any crimes committed would be a little difficult to report if the ‘subject’ was too mindless to notice or to say anything.
whatever. you threw the flier away, you did your job as a good samaritan by tossing it so someone much much worse than you wouldn’t get a chance to look at it, and thus, you can forget all about the headset. pretend you never saw the flier or knew it existed and carry on with your life.
except, you can’t really. it permeates your thoughts, seeps inside of your subconscious until you begin to hypothesize that the headset wasn’t the real hypnosis, it was seeing that flier. you know you must be delusional. it’s not real, you’re not really mind controlled from just reading the flier, but… would it really hurt it buy it? you had the money for it and it’s not too expensive at all.
you hate yourself for it but you look on the website, just as hypnotic as the flier was, and you see multiple variations of the headset. some more suited towards different outcomes for ‘subjects’ and some just different stylistically.
you find the one you were looking at earlier. the ultra brainwasher 3000. it’s a stupid name, you’re aware. it just doesn’t really matter because who’s gonna know that you own this? you’ll keep it, maybe try it out on yourself to see what it’s like. you won’t do anything crazy, maybe like, hypnotize yourself to not be able to sit down until all your household chores are done, just for the day. the ultra brainwasher 3000 claims to have this functionality, and you’re… more or less, curious.
you order it and spend two weeks in absolute hell, making sure your boyfriend is never home alone when the package could arrive. you’re not worried he’d open it and see the device. he doesn’t look through your stuff, but the packing sticker ‘brainmelting industrial company’ would…. catch his eye for sure. try explaining that to your boyfriend, especially because even if you’re a good liar, you’re not to leon.
but, you get it, and it’s perfect because leon isn’t home right now, and you get to play with your new toy for a little bit. the box is smaller than you expected, only including the headset, a charging cord, and a set of instructions.
as you’re reading, the thought only just now hits you. it’s surprising that it’s taken you this long to have this idea, given how it would be someone else’s first instinct.
“should i…” you murmur to yourself, looking around nervously to see if anyone is in earshot, “… should i use this on leon..?”
i don’t know, should you use a mind control headset on your poor boyfriend that was just sent on a mission to save the fucking president’s daughter? maybe not.
you don’t know how it took you this long to come up with the concept. i mean, the flier did mention making someone your obedient housewife, but… they never said that someone had to be a girl…
it’s gross or actually more disgusting, honestly, how excited you get at the prospect of doing this to leon, but you decide that yeah, fuck it, you might as well brainwash your boyfriend. truthfully, what are the consequences? besides… ruining your relationship, betraying his trust, destroying him as a person… eh, it’s only temporary, right? there’s ways to make it only temporary.. and there’s no way he’d remember..
you fiddle with it, curious of all the different things you could do to him. the headset didn’t have presets, you could make up literally anything you wanted him to believe. you could make him the obedient housewife, but you could also make him a servant, maybe even dress him up all pretty as a maid. you could make sure of his loyalty and commitment, make him be so in love with you that even the thought of being with another woman makes him physically ill.
he gets home later that night, worn down and tired and exhausted in every possible way. and you know you’re going to have to put on your best acting skills. you’re not sure if you’re ready to do this, but you’re gonna have to be, so you press a sweet kiss to his lips, one he lingers on for just a moment too long. his lips chase after yours as his eyes open back up slowly, looking at you through his pretty lashes, an eyebrow raised, “what?”
you can’t help but adore him, his bluntness and gruff attitude, yet how soft he touches your waist as he pulls you closer. leon is nothing if not gentle and sweet, and you love that about him, “nothing, i just… i just wanted to look at you,” you say, and it reminds you just how easy leon is. just a couple of words and his eyes get a little glassy, his heart leaping out of his chest just a bit.
it sometimes helps that your boyfriend has been through every form of hell since that day in raccoon city, so sometimes just sweet words and little gestures get a bigger reaction than you’d expect. he’s traumatized and broken down, so the love you give him matters so much more.
in short, he’s easy. he gives in quickly and doesn’t like to fight, not with you. gives you everything you want, doesn’t protest, doesn’t ask for much besides your attention and love.
��you always stare at me,” he says awkwardly. god he’s so not charming that it makes him effortlessly likable.
that’s what’s so sucky about the idea of hypnosis. do you lose the person he used to be? sure, a mindless househusband would be great, helplessly obedient and passive and hardworking, but does this override his actual personality? that’s a bit too scary.
you make an effort to soak in these parts of his personality, enjoying every inch of his pretty little mind. you decide that no matter what you do to him, you can’t ruin him completely. you’d miss his heart, rough and guarded but nonetheless yours.
“i wanna try something,” you murmur to him, your heart pounding a little more than it should, “do you trust me?”
“of course i do,” he says. your heart almost aches, he trusts you so implicitly.
“close your eyes,” you say, and he complies easily.
you step away to grab the headset, and he’s so sweet and good that he doesn’t even peek. you take a deep breath, and commit to it.
you place it on his head, and he grumbles, but doesn’t object. poor thing. doesn’t even realize what’s happening to him.
—
the setting on the headset that you chose wasn’t anything flashy but it was labeled ‘semi-permanent’ and it stated that the subject would not remember anything from the moment of hypnosis to the moment they wake up next. so, all and all, even if you felt horrible, the damage wouldn’t be permanent, and leon wouldn’t even remember what happened.
truthfully, it felt like nothing could go wrong. it wouldn’t alter him too much, just… make him helplessly obedient for a couple hours. you could turn up the intensity if you wanted to, if it wasn’t quite enough to satisfy your curiosity.
you decide that it’s now or never, especially since being lost in your head while your boyfriend is cluelessly wearing what looks like a vr headset is kind of… odd.
you start the application, waiting for it to begin on his end.
“what are you up to?” he asks innocently, probably still not seeing anything while it loads. the question sounds like an accusation, but it’s really not. leon genuinely just wants to know what’s going on. it’s hard not to, but you don’t answer.
you notice the exact moment that it starts because grunts out of nowhere and his whole body tenses, and he clutches onto the fabric of the couch cushions, using that sense as a way to ground himself during an overload of audio and visual stimulation.
you reach to grab his hand, and his grasps yours tightly, desperately, as if physically pleading with you to make it stop.
you whisper to him, “shhh, nice and easy,” you’re not even sure if he can hear you, but you still feel the need to speak. you’re not sure if it’s your voice or your touch but he relaxes just slightly, his breath raggedy and tense. he’s trying like hell to keep himself together, but it’s so overwhelming that it’s hard for him to think, “hey… it’s okay. you’re okay, just… let it happen.”
a pathetic little whimper escapes his throat as his body goes slack, jaw hanging open and arms hanging limply by his sides, “wha… why?” his voice sounds small, weak, and if you weren’t so cruel, you’d immediately take it all back and apologize and just face the consequences.
but you’re too far deep to back out now, even if leon’s pitiful demeanor is almost swaying you to stop, you know you can’t. not now.
“i… i thought you…” he whines, body tensing and spasming as he tries to put some form of coherent thought together, “wha… why..?” he whimpers again, pathetically broken down in just a matter of minutes.
you sit there with him, holding his hand, waiting for the process to be done, and once it is, you take the headset off.
he seems agitated, but doesn’t seem to know what at. his muscles are tense, but he doesn’t make any sudden movements.
“hey,” you mutter gently, and he almost flinches at the sound, looking at you with those wide deer eyes again, scared. you reach out to touch his face, fingers caressing his cheek.
the cogs in his brain turn as he processes what’s happening, and the agitation seems to evaporate and become replaced by a sense of calm and relaxation. he looks into your eyes, and it seems like he’s deciding something.
“leon?”
“yes? how… can i serve you?” he asks, jaw dropping at his own words. he’s so stunned at what he’s saying and how he’s acting yet he can’t help it.
“…address me as… ma’am,” you say, and he shivers, eyes closing tensely as he tries to figure out what the hell is going on, “and go get me something. how about… a cup of coffee? yeah, let’s start there.”
it makes sense that he’s fading in and out, the programming would probably need more time to settle in before it was done and his personality obviously wouldn’t just disappear, but it was still a little bit heartbreaking to watch him fight the voice in his head that is desperate to obey you.
as he disappears into the kitchen, you sit where he was sitting on the couch to take a moment to think it all over.
leon has never been the most… dominant man. he has his moments of aggression and tension that turn into a roughness that his soul seems to often carry, but it’s never controlling. he’s not demanding, he asks nothing of you besides gracing him with your presence.
but due to his past, submission also doesn’t come easy to him. he likes to think he would lean more sub, just because he’s so malleable to your will, so easy to convince. anything you want is yours, and if you want his dignity laid out in the palm of your hand, then it’s yours to keep for eternity. he just struggles to fully give up control, especially since you know he’s not really had much of that in his life.
you kept his personality intact for the most part, but… he just seems so different. he responds pretty much the same, talks the same, acts the same. something just doesn’t seem right.
“here’s the coffee you asked for,” he mutters when he returns, his voice gruff but soft at the same time. he’s… definitely conflicted. the implanted urge to obey you mindlessly and the natural urge to protect his self-respect are fighting in his head. you watch curiously to see which will win.
leon has been through hell, and you can always see it when you look into his eyes. he’s been controlled by the government, a puppet on their strings, since he survived that night in raccoon city. he must be used to a lack of control in his life. but now he’s your puppet, and you have no interest in using him as a killing machine. you have… different plans for him.
“thanks,” you whisper, and he nods, quiet but obedient. just how you wanted him. he stands there beside you, not really knowing what to do with himself as you take a sip, “rub my feet now.”
“..what?”
“you heard me,” you say. and he did.
something in his stomach sinks at the command, a feeling of urgency to do as you say fills his entire being, but it just feels so wrong to him. you’re never this brazen, this demanding.
“come on, leon,” you say, almost condescendingly, pointing to the floor right in front of the couch, “on… your… knees.”
he breathes shakily, but kneels down in front of you, avoiding eye contact as he gives you your damn foot massage. there’s turmoil in his head, easily seen by that deer-like look in his eyes as he stares wide-eyed at the ground. despite his roughness, he’s always had these soft, fragile eyes, reminding you of who he really is. it would be truly heartbreaking to watch him go through this if it also wasn’t incredibly attractive to put him on his knees and order him around.
leon has always been relatively compliant, but now it’s on a whole other level. anything you ask for, despite some inner conflict, he’ll do. you wonder just how far you could push him, but… you don’t decide to test that just yet.
for a few minutes, or however long it takes for you to finish your coffee, you sit there with him. his touch is good but not very skilled. he gets the tension and soreness out though, and you’re sure you could train that into him over time.
“take off your shirt,” you say, and his throws off his t-shirt easily. it lands in the corner unimportantly, and your smirk radiates confidence and something else much more sinister, “stand up, bend over in front of me.”
he closes his eyes tightly, clearly fighting that inner battle but the part of him desperate to get away and to not obey you is losing. he slowly rises to his feet and does as you ask. he places his hands on the coffee table, legs spread slightly like he already knows what’s about to happen. funny, because he doesn’t seem to know much of anything right now.
you stand up, hands touching all over him but particularly grasping at his ass, pulling down his sweatpants and boxers and enjoying the way his muscles flex, tightening and hardening when you grab him, “you never let me spank you,” you muse, almost annoyed, “i get it. you get nervous with power play and letting me dom you or whatever, but i always wanted to hit it just once. just to satisfy the curiosity of what it would be like.”
your hand pulls back and slams against his butt with a loud smacking noise. he gasps, breathing out shakily after the hit, “i… i’m sorry, ma’am.”
“but now that we’re here… and i’ve already got a taste, i don’t think i ever want to stop. so, from now on, no more of that. if i want to slap your ass, i’m going to,” you murmur, “and you will not try to stop me or convince me not to.”
“i.. i…” he whimpers, and for a second you pause, nervously that the real leon, somehow deep down, heard that, “… yes, ma’am.”
“good,” you mutter, slapping it again, feeling the hit in your hand as you pull away, and if you can feel it so clearly then you’re sure he can, “now, be polite and say ‘thank you’. thank me for teaching you how to correctly behave.”
“tha… thank you, ma’am,” he whispers, eyes shutting slowly as his deep inner need to resist is weakening.
“i own you now,” you groan, grasping at his hips posessively, mouth pressing open kisses to his bare shoulder, “no, i… have always owned you. owned your body, you just didn’t realize it.”
he nods, incredibly turned on. his body aches to be claimed, to be made yours.
sure, leon has always been yours, but his body has been purely his. he’s… cautious with it. he’s been more or less just too busy for romantic partners, but somehow you snuck your way into his life and he happily lets you stay. he just… is slowly learning to trust you with himself.
he can do easy, comfortable, casual sex. what he can’t do is hand himself over to you like this, helplessly obedient, submissive in every possible way. as much as leon doesn’t have the energy to fight, tired and worn down, fighting is all he know.
your nails drag against the skin of his torso and back, leaving pretty red lines wherever they go, “no more fighting. no more stressing about it. all you have to do is be mine, unequivocally.”
“i… i am..” he mumbles, and you tilt your head, eyeing him curiously. he notices, shying away, “i… i am yours. unequivocally. you can… you can have me.”
manhandling has always been a little difficult, considering leon is all muscle and he’s a sturdy guy, but you spin him at the hips to face you, and he’s effortlessly moved, “can i… have your body just as much as i have your heart?”
“yes, i… yes, ma’am, it’s yours. do whatever you want with it, ma’am,” he says, a slight daze in his eyes, clearly he’s not all the way there. he's trying. he’s still so soft, so tender and malleable, so leon.
you lean in to press a kiss to his lips, and he melts into your touch, hands grasping him roughly, in a way that might hurt anyone else, but leon is strong. sure, your touch is bruising him, but… he doesn’t have enough
of his mind left to be bothered.
lips trail down his neck and shoulder, but move back up to his ear, sucking on his skin in a vampiric manner. you whisper to him, “you’re gonna only focus on my pleasure.”
“i… i am? i… i am…” he stutters, god it’s so damn cute.
“of course you are. you’d rather eat me out than have an orgasm yourself, wouldn’t you? if i was a crueler person, i would find a way to mind control your orgasms away completely. that way you could… focus on my pleasure, but i’m not that mean.”
he shudders, your lips pressing to the sensitive spot underneath his ear, teeth dragging down his skin, teasing him, taunting him.
“you wanna eat now?” you ask, lips pressed to his collarbone now, and he moans out an affirmative. you suck a hickey against the skin right atop of the bone, admiring the redness, the way you get to watch it turn a disgusting shade of purple. one that should make you nervous to have done to him, only turns you on.
instead of ordering him into his knees this time, you just push him, easily putting his head between your legs. his hands come up to hold your thighs, steadying himself as you half-stand half-sit on the counter. he pulls your pants down enough , but can’t even be bothered to take off your panties, just pushing them to the side.
“can.. i, ma’am?”
you chuckle, not really expecting him to be so polite, “go for it, sweet thing.”
he leans in, pressing a teasing kiss to your clit, just once, before his tongue meets your folds and he licks and sucks like tomorrow won’t come but he’ll make sure you will. he groans into your pussy like he’s the one being pleasured, and that honestly seems like a fair comparison. sure, he was physically pleasing you, but even just the act of giving oral is making his head spin with a satisfaction he has never felt before. he could get high off of this.
leon has always been good at giving head. much better than just good. he’s incredible. it’s the one thing where he can fully just zone out. if you’re too lost in your own pleasure, then you can’t focus on him and how he’s feeling, and there’s something oddly safe about the feeling of being, for all intents and purposes, alone with his thoughts. eating your pussy just comes so natural that it’s second nature.
but now? he can’t get lost in his thoughts if he doesn’t have any. doesn’t mean he’s enjoying it any less. he’s enjoying anything you ask him to do. you could tell him to go fold your laundry and then clean your bathroom and do your dishes and he’s do everything diligently and he’d be satisfied the whole time. god, maybe you do really want a househusband. besides, leon could use the emotional break from his job. he’s content enough serving you.
he makes you cum sooner than you expected, but it’s literally just because he’s that good with his tongue, and when he moved one his hands from your thigh to press two fingers into your cunt, fingering you in thick circular motions as he sucked on your clit, you were gone.
he continues, wet fingers gushing in a fast rhythm as you orgasm, grinding against his mouth, using him completely for your own pleasure. it was always a secret fantasy of his, and now it’s reality, even if his mind isn’t all the way there and the only thoughts running through his head are is she pleased with me? did i do a good job? do i deserve her praise? i should do better next time. i should serve her better. i only want to serve her.
and now that he’s completely helpless, servitude being the only concept he can comprehend, and you come down from a high so intense it took you a second to remember that leon was waiting patiently for your next command, next order.
“put… put me on the couch…” you gasp out in heavy breaths.
he’s strong, and he helps to guide you to the couch, body still part paralyzed from such an intense pleasure. you lay there, still breathing a little heavy.
“go get dressed and cleaned up…” you mutter to him, “and then come back out here and cuddle up next to me.”
he does as you ask, finding his clothes and getting dressed again, and then when he approaches the couch again, you reach out your arms for him. the smile he gives you is almost too real. too… really leon. you still feel that twinge of nervousness in your gut, but then he lays against you, head tucked into the crook of your neck, and you know he doesn’t know. for all that he’s good at, leon’s not a great actor.
you reach your hand up to run your fingers through his hair repeatedly, soft and soothing motions to lull him into a state of compliance.
“you’re mine,” you whisper, hoping he’ll confirm it back.
of course he does, softly, no longer feeling conflicted, “yours, ma’am.”
“you’ll be obedient and submissive from now on,” your voice is soft but carries a dominance he doesn’t quite think he could ever escape nor would he ever want to.
“i’ll be.. obedient and submissive.”
“you’ll only focus on my pleasure,” you say, knowing he’ll repeat it back obediently just like the ones previous, but you feel his rock hard cock against your leg and as much as you want to shove his cock inside of you in an instant, you can’t help but want to control him like that. keep his orgasms just out of reach until he goes mad from the teasing and edging you plan to do to him. keep him nice and horny and desperate, just how you like him. if he wasn’t submissive enough for you before, he is now.
“only yours, only ever yours, please…” his voice is soft and meek and god if you wanted to you could find a mind control that was permanent and just… leave him like this forever. let him take care of your home and future kids and do your household chores and tasks. keep him completely obedient, god it would be…
“you can’t resist,” you whisper, leaning into his hair,
resting your head against his in a soft intimate moment, “i can’t resist, ma’am.”
you nod gently, and after a moment, you sigh, running your fingers through his hair, “i’m.. i love you, leon. sorry about all of this..”
“… why are you apologizing, ma’am?” he asks, tilting his head slightly even in your grasp to show confusion. he really is just like a little puppy sometimes.
“you know.. about the mind control.”
he shrugs, the most unbothered happy smile on his face, “oh, that’s.. that’s okay, i’m fine with it. i.. already belonged to you.”
“but that was in a more… romantic way. an ‘i belong with you’ kind of way. not the kind i did to you,” you say, just a tinge of guilt holding you back, but you push it aside, “it’s nothing, don’t worry about it. i just.. just know i love you. even when i’m ordering you around.”
“i’ll remember that, ma’am,” he smiles up at you just a little softer, just a little more like his true self, just a little more leon. that heavy feeling of guilt in your gut will never quite go away, will it?
you fall asleep on the couch together, knowing or maybe just hoping you’ll wake up to leon not remembering anything. hopefully he doesn’t piece together that he has no memory of you giving him that hickey and those bruises on his hips were definitely not his job's doing.
—
you wake up to a fond smell of breakfast and a bright morning, sitting up off the couch as you look at your phone. leon’s not laying there next to you, which is odd but not completely uncommon. sometimes he goes out in the morning to work out or disappears in the middle of the night when he’s needed somewhere, but most of the time, and today included, he’s just in the kitchen.
you find him there, standing in front of the coffee pot, and you walk up to him to wrap your arms around his midsection, softly burying your face into his back to shyly hide from his gaze.
“awh, morning lovebug,” his sweet raspy morning voice says to you, a hand on your arms, holding you tight so there’s not even a chance you could let go, “missed ya yesterday. did you sleep alright?”
“...mhm,” you hum, pressing a sweet kiss to his shoulder blade.
it’s a sweet moment, full of love and warmth and tenderness and you could have almost forgotten what you did to leon last night had the smell of coffee not been hanging in the air. but hey, at least he doesn’t remember what really happened, though he’s kind of confused just how he forgot how he got all of these bruises and scratches.
#sub leon kennedy#leon kennedy#leon kennedy x reader#leon kennedy x you#leon s. kennedy#leon kennedy smut#sub leon kennedy smut#resident evil#leon kennedy resident evil#resident evil smut#reader insert#smut#sub!leon#re2r leon#re2 smut#re2#re2r#re4#re4 leon#re4 remake#re4 smut#resident evil 4#moon.dc#moon.a#moon.ncdc
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Having Vash and Wolfwood as roommates would include;;
warnings;; i don't define a relationship, but it kinda hints at all three of you being together, lots of fluff, nothing nsfw (but I'm thinking about doing some nsfw headcanons for this in the future if anyone is interested)
How it happens/Meeting Vash
You’re basically desperate when your plans for moving in with your ex best friend fall through, leaving you basically homeless right before the semester is about to start
Looking online, in the newspaper even, you’re searching for any place that doesn’t look scummy, creepy, or charges you up the ass
Knowing full well that living without roommates in this economy is impossible, you’re hoping to find some nice people-
And boy do you luck out
Posted on some stupid roommate finder website is an add for a three bedroom apartment that’s in a sort of sketchy part of town, but offers protection for anyone willing to brave it. The guy that posted it seems nice, the ad is kinda funny, and the rent is cheap
You decide to try it out
When you first meet Vash, it’s in a little coffee shop near the uni you’re attending. It’s a safe spot to meet with a stranger, and he was cool with whatever you suggested. Green flag.
He’s pretty nice, funny, and insanely cute. He tells you that the other roommate, a man he calls “Nicholas” is at work, but from the way Vash talks about him you assume he’s a chill dude too
You can’t help but feel a bit intimidated by how attractive Vash is. He’s blonde, with a cute little mole, and his eyes are like…woah
Plus he’s got a cute little piercing !!!
No guy this good looking should be this nice
You decide pretty quickly this feels like a good match, and bam the deed is done
You move in next week, get your stuff situated and suddenly you have two new roommates
Meeting Wolfwood
It’s almost disappointing how little you see of the other roommate in the first week. Vash explains that he’s been taking on extra shifts at work but you still kinda feel like maybe the man is avoiding you?
All you know of the man is that he smokes, drinks a little, and has weird taste in movies
You see random objects strewn across the house that belong to him and you start trying to figure out his personality in your head
You decide that he’s probably some skinny stoner, and you’re pretty confident in that hypothesis until you actually see him
You bump into him in the morning right before you head off to start your first day of class
You literally bump into him-
As he’s leaving the bathroom, you’re in the hallways and a collision occurs. To make matters worse he’s shirtless
And he’s hot
He’s wearing sweatpants, his toned torso out in the open, and his hair is a bit of a mess. You can tell it’s sort of a short wolf-cut though- and it’s definitely working on him
He kinda smirks down at you and says it’s nice to finally “run” into you
And fuck- how are you supposed to survive having TWO hot roomates
General Chaos
You find out pretty quickly that these two are not the most normal people
And you freaking love it
Once Wolfwood’s insane work schedule chills out, you finally get chance to see the duo in action
They kind act like an old married couple. It’s a bit scary at first, and you fear you might be third wheeling but you soon mix into their dynamic quite nicely
Once wolfwood starts calling you some funky nickname you know you’ve wormed your way into their hearts
Your schedules all clash a bit, but you all find time to see each other throughout the day. Wolfwood has a morning class like you, and so you end up eating breakfast together most days. You start taking turns making food for each other
No matter what you both at least drink an entire pot of coffee together, and complain about life
Vash and you meet up in the afternoon, since your afternoon classes are close to each other. He’s the one who texts you the first time to ask if you want to meet up- and your heart does a little flip
It has become a habit. Whenever you two aren’t busy with other things, you’ll sit outside on a grassy area and talk for a second
All three of you hang out at night when Wolfwood isn’t working insane night shifts
Saturdays are movie nights. You HAVE to attend movie nights
It gets crazy. Especially when Wolfwood graciously shares his stuff.
The first time they see you cry- you’re pretty sure they might explode
You’re stressed from school, whatever job you might have, and probably a few family problems too. Vash walks in to your room to ask you what you want for dinner, sees the tears and whips out his phone to tell Wolfwood
He then immediately rolls you up in a blanket and makes you cuddle him on the couch to destress.
He’s insanely patient with you, rubbing your back and letting you vent
Wolfwood kicks open the door with your favorite comfort food moments later, and the three of you sit and watch a stupid movie
Wolfwood keeps his arm around you, and lets you rest your head on his chest
Vash’s hand is in yours
They’re pretty respectful of your privacy at first- but they’re both like the clingiest friends ever
Vash doesn’t mean to- and will apologize if he oversteps boundaries
Wolfwood on the other hand just doesn’t care. He’ll waltz into your room and go “Hey- stop screaming- I need you to make sure I got this math correct.”
Crazy competitive game nights, that sometimes end in you pulling Wolfwood off of Vash as Vash screams for his life to be spared (he like staking stars from Wolfwood in mario party) (It ends in bloodshed every time) (He should really stop)
Grocery shopping is just Wolfwood acting like a dad while you and Vash are off shoveling sweets into the cart (He secretly puts his favorite treats in the cart too though)
You and Vash stage an intervention for Wolfwood when he gets a little bit too into buying random jewelry covered in crosses (“we know you have religious trauma- and yes you look good in them- but come on-”). He walks into the apartment, sees the sign, and then walks out
Vash invites his brother over once and you’re pretty sure you’re about to be cut. (“No Vash- Knives is nice…he’s just scary.” “He just has a resting “I want to murder” you face!”)
Feelings bloom?
They really warm up to you. One day it becomes clear that you’re just…part of them now. Like they can’t imagine you ever leaving their side
It’s the same for you. You walk out one day, and grab your mug of coffee from Wolfwood and…you just kinda spot and think that you really like these guys. Things feel right
I think overtime things just slowly get intimate-
like you start holding Vash’s hand just casually throughout the day
And sometimes Wolfwood will come rest his head on your shoulder from behind, and you’ll reach up and run your hand through his hair
Casual soft touches just become a thing you know?
Vash lets his hand rise under your shirt a bit when you’re sitting with him on the couch
And eventually…maybe they become less casual?
Wolfwood puts his hand on your waist as he passes by behind you
The sexual tension is like palpable
I don’t really know who finally kisses who- or how things go from wholesome to spicy- but it gets there eventually
And soon you three are more than just roommates, more than friends, and even if you don’t know what it is- it’s kinda perfect
You renew the lease for the next year, and you’re pretty damn happy you were homeless for that little bit now
#wolfwood x reader#nicholas d wolfwood x reader#vash x reader#vash the stampede x reader#trigun x reader#wolfwood headcanons#vash headcanons
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sorry but please... post your akio plastic covered couch tweet here... the world needs to know...
Warning: pics of gross shit happening on the couches
I'll do you one better and include the STORY! So, I, Vanna (note: Yasha mostly does the Tumblr and I mostly do the Twitter,) was smoking enough weed to knock out a large horse or put a very tiny dent in my constant back and shoulder pain, as one does when when they're a middle-aged Registered Nurse in the year 2023. (I'm 39 but it's an old 39, lmao.)
Scrolling through Twitter, I stumble on a fanart of Suletta from Witch of Mercury sitting goofily on a white couch. Now I haven't seen this show yet, but the white couch....looked familiar, and I know the show is very much a descendent of Utena in terms of creative teams. For those that don't know, the series is written by Ichirō Ōkouchi, who also wrote the two Revolutionary Girl Utena novelizations...which if you didn't know about before, you know about now, and can read translated on our site here! (Warning: Touga and Miki uh, in the novels...)
Anyways, so I hop onto my own website and start downloading the images that will constitute receipts, before realizing 1. these images are all on multiple computers feet away from me, 2. the couch isn't an identical match, 3. that'd have been weird anyway, and most importantly, 4:
AKIO'S COUCHES DON'T LOOK RIGHT. OBSERVE:
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The edges of the armrests have sloppier upholstery than the blanket I have covering my computer desk. I took the time to tuck seams at least. What is this??
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Now it could absolutely be leather, I thought. It would absolutely track. But leather upholstery doesn't look like this. It doesn't wrinkle quite this way. It would have cleaner seams.
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No. No that's too shiny for leather. So here I am, presented with this strangeness I'd never really considered in how Akio's couch is drawn, and having spent the last few months learning about my Italian-American family history, my chemically altered ass came to the only reasonable conclusion:
Akio Ohtori has plastic coverings on his white couches, like he's a depression era American in poverty.
Fuck yeah, I though, A HIT TWEET, there, at the end of all Tweeting things. (Yeah I'm working on that, stay tuned, lmao. I of all people know when to bail on stupid men with stupid power.) Because I am me, I framed it as semi serious by pulling a context to explain it out of my ass:
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I was joking.
But the replies? They were not. And then I thought about it some more. And I've kept thinking about it. Do I seriously think Ikuhara and Co literally are intentionally drawing a plastic covered couch? Doesn't that feel, Vanna, like a bit of a stretch, even for Utena meta?
Listen to that CRONCH when Akio sits down in episode 31, before Anthy is seen by Nanami. Look, the buttons on the back rest don't quite fit, but the rest? Yeah it kinda does. I was high, but not wrong!?
Akio *does* surround himself with a bizarre hodgepodge of Americana as an aesthetic. The arm garters. The piping and cut of his cowboy-ass shirt. His American car. His mullet. His miniature fucking golf. Why not the plastic covered couch? It's a trope of American poverty that would absolutely have fallen neatly into the diet of American pop culture that influenced Ikuhara. (He makes references to E.T. and The Godfather and Suspiria and all kinds of things in his other work, Utena itself is a little less obvious with individual references but inherits HUGE amounts of vibes from the same content--Ikuhara and Co watched Lost Highway in theaters during the production of the Akio Arc and I will not be convinced otherwise.)
So yeah. That's the story, and that's the theory. Do I seriously believe it was deliberate? Maybe. Probably. Possibly. But it fits so well it's headcanon for me, and in the Utena fandom, pretty much all canon is kind of headcanon so enjoy this one.
What an asshole.
#utena#revolutionary girl utena#utena meta#akio ohtori#akio's couches#do I really need to point out the functional utility of plastic covered couches for this particular character though
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