#maior shutting doors left and right

[grapecaseschoices]

the difference between noah's convo with anders and maior's convo with anders is so fufcking funny.

maior shutting down convos before they get anywhere.

so they have subtitles in this game

[blogadrianaleite-blog]

O DIA EM QUE PERDI A VIRGINDADE

na internet

O DIA EM QUE PERDI A MINHA VIRGINDADE

NA INTERNET

 Você só perde a virgindade nas redes sociais quando é notado. Alguns têm a felicidade de terem um post super compartilhado, milhares de amigos de uma vez só, mas o jeito mais comum é pela treta (briga virtual).

Briga, um questionamento virtual pesado, com palavrões, ou com ataques e critica pesada ao seu post ou comentário.

 Eu entrei bem tarde nesse ramo.(com mais de 30 anos!) O Orkut era a rede do momento, cheguei a receber o convite, mas os meus parcos conhecimentos digitais, fizeram com que eu nunca entrasse novamente na página que abri, e perdi o contato com a amiga que me enviou o convite.

A minha primeira rede foi o Facebook, que pouco a pouco, em passos largos, devoraria o Orkut.

Minha página era pequena, e até hoje ainda é. Tenho um pouco mais de 300 amigos lá, e pra mim tá bom.

Num post sobre a bagunça dos alunos em sala de aula, citei como era a minha turma do oitavo ano ginasial.

Batalhas de carteiras. Brigas onde a porta da sala de aula foi arrancada entre socos e empurrões.

Também havia o corredor polonês, mas era coisa dos nojentos e metidos a besta do segundo grau. Eles ficavam de costas nas paredes dos corretores. Os distraídos que passava por ali, se fosse menino, da oitava série, (a minha série) principalmente, eram chutados, meninas tinham as suas saias levantadas, vaiadas ou um puxão no cabelo.

 Na minha ingenuidade, disse que a minha escola era particular.

Apareceu um bostinha me chamando de “patricinha”, “filhinha de papai”

Jesus, eu não estava preparada. Não sabia que essas coisas aconteciam por aqui. Pouco tempo depois, o Brasil ficaria conhecido mundialmente como a rede com internautas mais ativos e furiosos do mundo. Somos os reis da zoação, e da fúria também.

 Até hoje, não tenho o costume de responder a esses babacas com palavrões. Se estou com paciência, eu uso argumentos, senão, ignoro.

De início, falei que a minha época de escola, era os anos 80, foi início da decadência escolar pública, onde as escolas ficavam sem aulas por até 6 meses com greves de professores, lembro que os alunos da rede pública, praticamente perderam dois anos com essa farra dos professores, em outro, foram aprovados de qualquer maneira, sem as provas finais, pois não haveria como recuperar as aulas pedidas.

 Que na minha escola, apesar de ser particular, nunca foi de elite. Havia os bolsistas, havia os filhos de faxineiros, zeladores, porteiros, lixeiros. Os com melhores situações financeiras, eram os filhos de donos de boteco e padaria. Tinha um aluno da minha classe, que tinha vergonha do empreendimento do pai: padaria.

E Sim, sofria bulyng dos ainda mais ricos: os filhos de médios empresários, filhos de funcionários públicos, quando estes descobriam que eu era filha de sucateiros.

 Mas ele continuou com suas gracinhas.

Joguei a minha cartada final. Disse que a palhaçada dele não me atingia, mas estaria sim, ofendendo os pais das crianças que ralavam muito para mantê-las na escola. Meus pais principalmente, que começaram o negócio catando lixo reciclável nas ruas.

No final ele aceitou a derrota e disse que eu era uma pessoa legal. Descobri logo em seguida que a minha primeira treta virtual teve plateia. Os comentários seguintes foram sobre nos dois.

Recebi até mensagem no chat.

No dia seguinte outro amigo, pela rede, falou com nossos amigos em comum o que havia acontecido.

 Houve outras, em uma, eu mesmo iniciei a treta. Quando a blogueira comunista postou afirmando que o Brasil é o país campeão em reciclagem de latinha, por termos empresários, sucateiros, que vivem de explorar a miséria do povo.

Virei bicho.

Contudo, sem palavrões , com argumentos, calei a boca da gorda.

Houve hates que me deixaram trauma no Twitter. Demorei a aprender a lidar com a rede. Mas a pior de todas foi a falecida g+. Não fiquei nem um mês por lá. Tudo que postasse, comentasse, era motivo para desrespeito e ataque.

Não vingou. O g+ pra mim foi a minha maior perda de tempo que já tive em uma rede social. Palavra de quem já apanhou várias vezes no Twitter...

THE DAY I LOST MY VIRGINITY ON THE INTERNET

You only lose your virginity on social media when you get noticed. Some have the happiness of having a super shared post, thousands of friends at once, but the most common way is by (virtual fight). Brawl, a heavy virtual questioning, with profanity, or with attacks and heavy criticism to your post or comment.

I got into this business pretty late. (over 30 years old!) Orkut was the network of the moment, I received the invitation, but my meager digital knowledge, made me never enter again the page I opened, and Lost contact with the friend who sent me the invitation. My first network was Facebook, which little by little, in stride, would devour Orkut. My page was small, and to this day it still is. I have a little over 300 friends there, and that's fine with me. In a post about the students' mess in the classroom, I quoted what my eighth grade class was like. Wallet battles. Fights where the classroom door was torn between punches and jerks. There was also the Polish runner, but it was the disgusting and son of the beast of the second degree. They'd sit on their backs on the walls of the brokers. The distracted who passed by, if it was a boy, eighth grade, (my series) mainly, were kicked, girls had their skirts raised, booed or a poke in the hair.

In my naivety, I said my school was private. A little girl came along calling me "missus", "daddy's little girl" Jesus, I wasn't ready. I didn't know these things were happening around here. Shortly thereafter, Brazil would be known worldwide as the network with the most active and furious internet users in the world. We are the kings of mockment, and of fury too.

To this day, I'm not in the habit of answering to these swearing. If I'm patient, I use arguments, or I ignore it. At first, I said that my school days, it was the 80s, was the beginning of public school decay, where schools were without classes for up to 6 months with teachers' strikes, I remember that the students of the public network, practically lost two years with this spree of teachers, in another, were approved anyway, without the final exams, because there would be no way to recover the classes requested.

That in my school, despite being private, was never elite. There were the fellows, there were the children of janitors, janitors, porters, garbage men. The ones with the best financial situations were the children of pub and bakery owners. I had a student in my class who was ashamed of his father's venture: bakery. And Yes, bulyng suffered from the even richer: the children of middle businessmen, children of civil servants, when they discovered that I was the daughter of scavengers.

But he went on with his cute little ones. I played my final card. He said his antics didn't hit me, but he would be offending the parents of the kids who were too much to keep them in school. My parents mostly, who started the business picking up recyclable garbage on the streets. In the end he accepted defeat and said I was a nice person. I found out right after that my first virtual had an audience. The following comments were about in both. I even got a message in the chat. The next day another friend, through the network, spoke to our mutual friends what had happened.

There were others, in one, I started the myself. When the communist blogger posted stating that Brazil is the champion country in recycling can, because we have entrepreneurs, scavengers, who live to exploit the misery of the people. I became a bug. However, without profanity, with arguments, I shut the fat woman's mouth. There were hates that left me trauma on Twitter. It took me a while to learn how to handle the network. But the worst of all was the late g+. I haven't been there for a month. Anything he posted, commented on, was a reason for disrespect and attack. You didn't get it. The g+ for me was my biggest waste of time I've ever had on a social network. Word of those who have caught several times on Twitter ...

[spellboundebook]

Author’s Note: This chapter is coming a little early. The first reason, I am sending it into a competition and wanted to give the first finished mini arc. And second, because I was really excited about the art this time around! Thought it was pretty good *dusts shoulder*. Let me know what you think! Enjoy!

Monaedi had to admit, this normal was much better than her previous situation! Instead of having lunch by herself, the next day she kept her word and took Theo to Poyo’s. The whole experience was astonishing to the blue haired girl, everything from the jungle gyms to the toys you could get with a kids meal. Mona was also forced to take a photo with Theo and the Chain’s mascot.

After they bought their food, they had lunch together in the courtyard. Again the day after that, then for the rest of the week, and onto the next. They mostly stayed on soft topics like school, hobbies, and foods they loved or would love to try. It was a very cathartic block of time. Theo didn’t have to worry about what someone might think if she said the wrong thing or acted out of turn; Monaedi couldn't believe that having someone to sit and talk to could be so...well, nice. What they didn't talk about was the fact that they only hung out in private, or that Theo’s friends began to wonder where she would disappear to, or family. Definitely not family...

At the end of the week, Monaedi went to their unofficial assigned table in the courtyard and she waited for Theo to meet her. She laid out her lunch, the same as always: nuggets, chips, sandwich, and drink. Though her book was left in her bag and she did not begin eating. Theo seemed to always eat absentmindedly from her lunch. Monaedi acted like it annoyed her, but here she was, waiting for her companion to dig in. But Theo wasn't there. She's never late, Mona looked towards the entrance.

Time passed and so Monaedi ate slowly. She pushed her food around with her fingers with a sigh. Finally, she felt someone sit down in front of her. Internally she smirked, but when she looked up she saw that Theo wasn't in a good mood. Or any mood? Her face was blank.

“My parents are coming,” Theo said her voice monotonous. Mona didn't know how to respond. So instead she gave a small nod urging her to continue and passed over the carton of nuggets. Theo picked one and took an irritated bite out of it.

“They say they want to see how I'm doing in school,” she said with her mouth full of food, “But they really just want to see me fail so they can bring me home.”

“Why would they want that?”   

“To them, I already have a job: Our family is our business. Ever since I was a teenager I would help my parents “negotiate”. I'm a good talker when I want to be, with a pretty face. So I would help coax potential clients into deals they usually didn’t want to take. I would dress up and be paraded around for these men and women...” Like a prop, Mona shivered and hoped that's all that was all Theo was expected to do.

“As long as I can remember, they have dictated my every move. My weird abilities and wanting to come to school just seemed like nuisances they tried to bury away. Because to them...it’s like... I’m only good for one thing.” That broke Mona’s heart because she could see that Theo could take on the whole dman galaxy if she wanted to. 

“They underestimate you, or don't even try to,” Mona said after a moment, “Don't let them think what you want to do is wrong. You're so much more than what they want you to be.”

Theo was stunned into silence. No one ever told her she could be more; in fact, no one talked to her like this before. With honesty. It's not like she hadn't thought about it, she came to Urdon Maior University to try on her own. But no one, not her parents or Mal’qier, had ever encouraged her. And it startled her how much she needed to hear it.

“Thank you,” she said quietly but then reality settled back in, “but I think you overestimate me. I'm not doing well in any of my classes. Most I'm on the cusp of failing. My parents are right—”

“It's still early enough in the semester,” Monaedi cut in before she could finish that thought, “You just have to need to quit some of the partying and stay in and study,” she finished with a chuckle.

“Quit partying? Now you’re asking for too much!” Theo thought for a moment, “...Thanks for talking this out with me.” Her expression so grateful, it was so soft and vulnerable it made Mona gaze at her for a little too long.

“What are friends for?” Monaedi said not able to look away.

“Friends,” Theo said breathlessly. Mona gave a small nod.

“Friends,” she replied quietly. They stayed in comfortable silence for a little while. Then Theo slowly gathered her things and headed to the entrance to the courtyard.

“Well, I shall descend into hell,” which made them both laugh heartily. And with that Theo left.  

Mona thought about her own family. She decided to give them a call. The mobile rang, and rang but eventually when to voice mail. Mona listened to the familiar answering machine message, “Hello you've reached the line of the Itreu’s Family. Leave a message after the beep.”

BEEP.

The weekend was going agonizingly slow. Monaedi looked at her mobile for what seemed like the thousandth time, checking to see if she had any messages from Theodora. Mona didn’t want to text Theo, she wanted to give her space and time to deal with her family’s visit. So this evening, Mona sat in her shared dorm room attempting to read while Zana, her roommate, got ready to go out for the night. Mona checked her phone again.

“Why do you keep looking at that thing?” Zana inquired a bit miffed. She was putting her earrings on looking back through the mirror. Monaedi was surprised she was even talking to her. Usually, she just acted like Mona didn’t exist, so it took her a moment to respond.

“...I...uh...I-I was hoping, from my friend—I was hoping to get a text from my friend,” Monaedi finally got out. Her roommate seemed to give up trying to decipher what Mona was trying to tell her.

“Right,” Zana said after eying Mona up and down. She didn’t say anything else, but took her makeup bag and headed into the bathroom shutting the door behind her. Mona took that as the end of a rare conversation. She went back to her book.

ZZZZ ZZZ—

Monaedi was on her mobile before the second vibration could end. She had a message.

Theo: I’m at your dorm. You here? Can I come up?

Mona: Yeah I’m here. Mona: How did you know where I live? Following me again. (ツ)

Theo: Thanks, what room number? Theo: And NO! I guessed, all the brainiacs live in Quadlr.

Mona: 303. Just come in the door is unlocked.

Mona set her phone down on her desk. Her roommate came out of the bathroom makeup successfully applied. She started to collect her things and acknowledged Mona slightly.

“I’m going out. I don’t want to take my key, don’t want to lose it. You’re always here right, just leave the door unlocked,” She said putting her jacket on heading towards the door.

“Um..A-actually I—” as she was about to respond except Theodora bursts into the room. She spots Monaedi on the bed and charges over to her.

“Take me somewhere,” Theo said to her a little out of breath, “Sorry there’s no elevator in here—” Theo gestured to the door and when she did she saw that they were not alone. Zana had her mouth agape as she stared at the scene in front of her. Mona shook off her own shock and got up between the two girls.

“Uh..T-Theo this is...Zana. Zana t-this is—”

“Theodora,” Zana said more than a bit surprised. She smoothed her skirt and tucked a loose hair behind her ear, “Nice to meet y—”

“Yeah you too,” Theo said hastily to Zana. She turned to Mona a bit more calm, “Please, take me somewhere.”

“Where do you want to go?” Monaedi didn’t understand what was going on.

“Anywhere,” she glanced over to Zana who continued to stare like a deer in headlights. Zana...was she waving? Theo squinted and waved back tentatively, “Somewhere...private.”

“...I might know a place,” Monaedi grabbed her jacket. She ushered Theo to the door and said behind her, “Could you lock up before you leave?” And with that, they were gone.

The two girls walked in silence for a while. Mona lead them down a couple of paths behind some of the school’s buildings and after some time they were off campus. They headed into the woods and climbed over a couple trees and fallen branches. Eventually, the girl’s came to a large clearing in the middle of the forest. There laid a patch of soft green grass, and in the middle was a gigantic white tree with no leaves. They gazed at it for some time.

“I did what you said. Not letting them take all this away from me,” Theo said still looking up at the tree, “It was awful.” And immediately Monaedi felt just that.

“I am so sorry. I shouldn’t have come between you and your family — ” Theo stopped her with a forceful shake of her head.

“No, no. It was the best thing I’ve ever done in my life,” there was a wisp of a smile when she looked back up at the tree, “Did you mean what you said?”

“What do you mean?”

“When we first met. Did you really want to help me practice with...whatever this is,” she said looking down at her hands like they were foreign objects. Mona looked at them as well, and she nodded.

“Yes...but why now?”

“In delays lies no plenty, right?” Theo shrugged and tried to wave it off. Monaedi gave her look as if to say “Go on”.

“I’ve hidden who I am my entire life...Not just this,” she raised her hands again, “But with a lot of things. I don’t think I can come out to everyone. Not right now. But, if you’ll have me...I’d like to be myself with you.” Mona smiled, at her, her eyes getting teary. She nodded.

“I’ve never had a real friend…” There it was again. Theo wanted to question that, but she didn’t want to interrupt. Mona rarely spoke about herself, so she stored that information away for later, “I am not sure why, but...I can be who I really want to be when I'm with you too.” 

To be continued...

Some chapter art is inspired by the anime Erased (x). It’s pretty good, but they had this beautiful scene that I had to try and draw!