#main verse ♡ dєstructívє σnєs líkє mє fσld whєn thєrє ís nσthíng tσ вust

[timidful]

@protectfuls​​ said: “You’re so different now.”

          Before   the   words   were   so   much   out   of   his   mouth   the   air   turned   tense   enough to snap , as multicolored eyes gazed forward past the man speaking and deep into the sky . Blue , white , and blazing light all melting into each other as she could barely make out what was 5 feet in front of her much less light years away . The girl turned away , not out of shame or rejection , it was just that the muddled colors made her more melancholic than she already was .  How much more was she bound to lose by the end of this --- and did it even matter to her anymore ?            Everyone changes , after six long years no one would be the same person they were before . It was a fact of life , one that can’t be out ran no matter how hard someone tried    (   and she sure as hell ran --- she ran further than the sun , but she could never outrun herself . )    He wasn’t trying to be insensitive , clearly by his tone he was worried for her , fretting over how much his sweet little Alexandra had turned sour .            There were no words she planned on forming back , she doubted he needed to hear her sob story . He was just stating facts , even if she left him worried with her silence he would live on . If he really did intend on listening to her explanation it would do him no good , there was no satisfying ending to her story .            ‘ I wish I had died years ago . ’   She finally answered , trying to dodge the topic he started --- though the one she started wasn’t much better .    ‘ If you care to know about that time ... ’   She stopped speaking as the images of her father passed through her mind , even then after all was said and done he still caused her to go cold .    ‘ That man is the reason , as he always is . ’   Even if her words were vague there was an understanding between them that Evgeni ruined their lives as if they were bugs under his feet .            ‘ He’s dead , you know ? He died a few years after the monastery fell . ’   She took a breath , taking a few steps forward and then slowly setting herself down on the grass . Leaning on her hands she once again looked to the sky as if it would tell her what to say .    ‘ Everyone knows , but I haven’t said anything about the how’s and the why’s . You’re a smart one , I’m sure you can figure it out . ’            It was no secret to anyone that her hands were stained with blood , but still people desperately tried to keep her and the dragon as separate . Sanya had gotten over that affliction much too long ago , knowing there was never a girl --- there had always been a dragon and a dragon only . She didn’t believe she deserved to survive , wishing that something had put her to rest much before her father’s death --- Much before she had taken life after life .            ‘ I’m sorry , I’m speaking all too much about unsatisfactory things . Why don’t you sit with me ? We can just pretend we are young again , we can be happy again . ’   

                              unprompted ask // damn this little body I don’t fit inside it

[timidful]

[What are you doing?] he signs to her, not really meaning to eavesdrop, but he couldn’t help but notice her in a more severe mood than usual. He nearly hesitated to even tap her shoulder to get her attention.

         She   was   staring   down   at   something ,   something gleaming and glowing in her hands . Her eyes locked on it as if in a trace-like state . The second she realized he was there she quickly slipped it into her pocket and turned to look at him ... a wild kind of look in her eyes. She studied him and then what he signed to her , trying to process all of the information . Her brain chugged , buffering and she squinted as if in pain .          ‘ i was just thinking .  ’  She signed back slowly , not lying but not entirely telling the truth . She had been lost in thought moments before , but it was more than that , worse than that . How she had gone this long without anyone finding out her secret was shocking to say the least , she had never been that great at keep secrets .  ‘  i just  ’  she started to sign and then stopped , looking for the right way to explain it to him .           ‘  it might sound strange but , i’m scared of hurting the people i’m close to .  ’  With no context , it could have looked comedic that Sanya was saying something so grave . To her , it was no laughing matter even if those around her had no idea what she was capable of it was better that way .

[timidful]

           Sanya   was   hurrying   herself   ,   her little legs trying to go a pace she could no keep for very long. Her head was down , eyes downcast as she tried to hide the obvious tears in them. Tiny sniffs echoed and follower her down the hallways , wishing and praying she didn’t run into anyone to ask her just what was wrong. Nowadays the monastery was usually empty , but with her luck today she wouldn’t have been surprised if someone stopped her. 

[timidful]

lifelirius liked your post

          She   couldn’t   contain   the   excitement   she   felt   when seeing him for the first time in years. For the time she had known him during the monastery he had always been kind to her , and never seemed to look at her like she was weak. In her endless bounds of joy , she called out from down the always of the monastery to him , as she picked up her pace. Her voice was mousy and only carried to him by the echos off the walls.    ‘ Felix ! ’    In the moment the words felt like nothing , just words said by an excited girl running down a hallway--- but to her it was so important , it was everything. She felt like he would turn and face her and he would listen . He would listen.

[timidful]

"what odd turns our lives have taken."

          People   say   such   strange   things   after   battles   , this she had come to learn. Sometimes it’s   empty   , or just something to fill the silence , it was never straight to her. People only had themselves to worry about , even in war , and it was fine by Sanya when she had no words to offer back. Though , this time she could tell he was speaking to her , his eyes trained on her face , covered in blood. Her breathing labored , her body aching . Why had she done that ? Only moments before she has jumped in front of him and killed that man ? Why was that his reaction ?             She just had to straighten up , and turn to him , eyes filled with something of amazement , or maybe it was fear ? A nod from her , agreeing , not entirely sure what she was agreeing with . She wasn’t a stranger to killing , nor was she one to death , but it still shook her up every once in a while. Someones blood on her face , someones life in her hands — She sighed , and with it she let go of all of those thoughts.   ‘ are you okay ? ’  Her words were quiet and meek , but they were there. 

[timidful]

strangely enough, the ball has left him in a good mood. good enough that the bow he gives her has none of the mocking tone it usually has, just the simple grace of someone that's spent hours practicing. "may i have this dance?"

          Sanya   was   more   than   excited   for   the   ball   at   the   start   of   the   night   , her body almost vibrating from her uncontrollable giddiness . She had spent hours upon hours during the day making herself look perfect  ( ��in her standards at least  )  , doing her hair up in a giant blue bun , and her make up to compliment her dress  (  she had picked it out , big and poofy !  ) . It felt almost like a dream  --- the dimmed and twinkling lights along with the twirling , and swirling of the others dancers brought her into a daydream of fairy tales . She could only imagine those dancers as herself , having the time of her life doing what she loved.           Though , she was met with a nightmare of the worst kind .           She had spent all of her time being shoved around in the crowds of people , her short stature not only made it hard for people to see her as she dodged and weaved past them , but it caused complications when looking for a dance partner. Which had been her real and only goal throughout the night. She kept trying to reach out , but most of the people had declined or were busying themselves with others , not only that but it seemed as if most of the people she knew hadn’t even shown up at all.            On top of the already terrible night , she noticed the pushing and shoving caused her hair and her make up to go to waste , for all she knew she looked like a mess now. A miserable tiny mess . But --- she promised herself she wouldn’t cry , no matter what had happened , it wasn’t like this was the first of her nights to go south.            Ah , he must have noticed , or maybe he was just looking for someone to dance with , but he approached her with a bow , and she could have sworn he looked just like a knight in shining armor .  There he was to save her disastrous night . All he had to do was ask her that simple little question before her face lit up and her eyes gleamed. Dominic was asking her to dance , even though she was sure she looked like a banshee , or that she was much too small to dance with --- no matter any of that , he was standing in front of her , hand outstretched for her to take . 

          With a slight nod of her head , she took his hand with a softness that could not have been human .  Sanya floated on her feet while dancing , gliding --- she could have been flying . As they spun out into the dance floor , her dreams were all coming true , and was much too excited to even pay attention to anything besides where she was placing her feet and her dancing partner . Hand in hand , and in a hypnotizing rhythm , she was captivated by the feeling of finally , finally , being able to show how capable she was .             Her dress was sparkling and shimmering while she danced , even the smallest of her movements caused a magic-like glimmer around them . They were mesmerizing together , taking the floor to themselves as they continued their waltz . This really had been what she was made for , and he had fulfilled all that she had ever wanted . To her , there was no way for her to repay the gift he had given her . 

[timidful]

@agneas (  s . c  )

          She   halted   in   her   path   ,   taking   a   few   steps   back   , as if the floor all around her had turned into a danger zone . Her eyes locked and frozen on one spot . A shape was slithering and shifting in the grass a few feet in front of her , and she was trying not to make any sudden movement . Who had ever heard of a Manakete afraid of snakes ?            ‘  Ah --- ‘ She couldn’t call for help , still taking slow and steady steps backwards . She looked around , wondering if there was anyone that would notice her waving her arms around , but wouldn’t that be dangerous ? She had no clue . But , there , Adelaide wasn’t too far from her ...  ‘  H ... Help ?  ‘ A voice as quite as a mouse tried to reach ears she wasn’t even sure could hear her. 

[timidful]

@yarkly​  (  s . c  )

           ‘ Uh --- ‘   She   tilted   her   head   to   one   side   ,   and   then   the   other   , as if she was an animal trying to hear better. Understand better. Had he said something to her ? He must have , looking at her with expecting eyes. Yes , he wanted an answer . She tapped her finger on her mouth , pulling out her notebook , she wrote out very simply  ‘  repeat ?  ‘

[timidful]

@secondsorrow  (  s . c  )

          Ah   ---   there   it   goes   ,   the   tome   fell   right   into   the   water   . She watched it start to sink down into the lake , the reflection of herself soon the only thing she was looking at . She had gotten better at not crying over trivial things like this , mistakes were bound to be made , human or not . She stood up , realizing she was going to have to tell Thane that she had dropped his tome right into the lake . She back trekked , pulling out her notebook to write down her apology before she got to him.            Spotting him , Sanya made the walk of shame back to him , and handed him the notebook , avoiding looking at his face . 

[timidful]

@avosloved ( s . c )

          Her   head   was   pounding   with   all   the   shouting   and   the   moving   rubble   , figuring that she was just tired she tried to worm her way away from all the noise . As she walked with her head in her hands and ears plugged , she noticed Odette was sitting   alone   in the dining hall . A pause , she decided to walk on over to the other lion and sit next to her , a quizzical look plaguing her face . 

[timidful]

" hey, sanya! " there's a cheerful lilt to her voice as she approaches the other girl, her smile friendly as ever. " would you like to come see an adorable new litter of kittens that one of the monastery cats had by the lake? they're soooooo cute! " she's definitely excited, if that wasn't obvious.

        Her   eyes   gleamed   filled   with   excitement   , hearing Odette mention kittens got her head nodding vigorously. She wasn’t sure if she had many encounters with the animals that littered the monastery , some times it felt as though they avoided her , so to be invited to go see some gave her the hope that they wouldn’t all scamper off once she approached — Not that new born kitten could do that regardless. Sanya’s hand clamped down on the other girls, as to signal she was ready for her to take her to the promised land of kittens.

[timidful]

@seeksblood​ ( s . c )

          A    flash   ,   hot   like   lightening   .   A   blade   had   come   in   contact   with   her   stomach , cause her to teeter and fall to one knee in front of the king . This wasn’t her first time sinking lower than low , the amount of pain she was in would never matter if it meant protecting someone else on the battlefield. She would take the blow, over and over. She choked , against her best efforts to keep herself together there was nothing to stop the blood coating her hands , nor the fact the world was barely in her view. 

[timidful]

'Did...did you just eat that whole rotisserie chicken in one setting???'. ( academy / part 1 Dimitri inbox call).

             Like   a   mouse   a   squeak   left   her   lips   ,   she   couldn’t   help   but   tense   up , startled . She wasn’t expecting anyone to notice her , much less speak to her . With a quick turn of her head , and a look upwards , she realized it was her king — it sounded as though he was scolding her . Was she … not supposed to eat all that food ? Did she eat the last one and he wanted it ? She couldn’t just let that be ! He was her king , after all ! She put her finger against her lips , deep in thought on a way to apologize to him .                                                                                                       Ah — ! Right !                She had some paper and a quill that should have been enough to write out a quick apology . She pulled a folded piece of paper out of her pocket and quickly scribbled out ‘ I’m sorry ! I didn’t know you wanted some ! ‘ Blissfully unaware of the lion mans actual concern . 

[timidful]

" What are you doing ? "

            Tap  !   Tap  !   The   sound   echoed   off   of   her   fingers   , the room was so hollow that the sound REVERBERATED around enough to get a few dirty looks from people who were trying to concentrate .   Her eyes slowly rose up to meet Celosia’s , the striking crimson trying to dig deep into her soul . Oh , how scary .     Her head    tilted    , one side , and then the other . Oh , how she wished her mouth would just open , but words continued to evade her .  She offered up a simple and weak shrug of her shoulders . The honest to goddess answer , she really didn’t have anything to do .

[timidful]

a  little  tag  dump  .  <3