#mah otp

[capsensislagamoprh]

Perfect technical program. That look of fire in his eyes from the stands. Yuri change his target for 'the best' from *number of medals and accolades* to overcoming difficulties, and grace in defeat. Oh, you know how it be...

I KNOW I KNOW YOURE ALL SICK OF SEEING ME.. but i just need to let it out. sue me.

okay okay ep 10. (i have some time right now and watching a few) boyyyyyy the absolute gold(excuse my pun) of this episode. victor narrating *chefs kiss*

we start with the “L Words”: Life and love. Here we go, if we hadn’t guessed it already, we’re knowing it now. Yuuri is Victors love. We knew Victor was Yuuri’s love, he done told the whole world in that press conference and on the ice but baby we knoooooow Yuuri is Victors love.

Chris scenes… if you follow me you know I love me some Chris. And just the shopping, is perfect, not only do we see some domestication there (eyyyyy) we get the rings. The church, the choir, the gold rings… is there anything better.

My point is this: Yuuri is soooo soft, almost too soft, but then we see this fire in him. He buys the ring, he takes Victors glove off (swoooon) and he places that ring on his finger. He owns it, and him, in that moment. Baby we need this Yuuri, but we wouldn’t have had this Yuuri if Victor had not entered his life.

Dinner with the boys(tm). Haha at Yurio looking at Otabek saying, “how much do i have to pay you?” Also, aweeeee at Victor getting them all together for Yuuri’s family/friends.

But, Chris, “what’s with the rings?” And Phichit, “my friend got married!” Okay, hold up, first off can we just enjoy how perfect it is that their friends don’t give a shit. “They got married. Obvs.” As if there was anything else that could have happened??? No. That is soo perfect. I mean makes my gay heart hopeful for the day, my guys. But more than that, Otabek clapping. He ain’t even know these ppl and he is FOR IT.

And Victor, oh him and those “L Words” “no, this is an engagement ring.” Boy I see you. Play that card, baby.

But, still my favorite scene is Yurio and him at the ocean. Yurio kicks him in the back bc he is dramatic (tm) and we see a side of Victor we hadn’t really got to glimpse. “You wanted to compete against me?” Hm… Victor doesn’t mention that often, huh? He uses it at what he thinks is motivation at times but this time we see it as a hurtful remark: you wanted to compete against the best. How many times this whole show we watch this man ignore and walk away the moment it is brought up, the moment it’s brought up about him returning to the ice. TONS. But then? I can only assume it’s because Yurio is insulting Yuuri, and their love. And Daddy Victor is saying: “try me again mfer”

Alright I’ll stop myself from this ted talk.

And leave it as this: “BE MY COACH VICTOR” Half naked Yuuri, dancing with the fkin looooove of his life and Victor, darling, he blushes.

oh ps victor didn’t sleep in that bed once BYEEEEEEEE

[juststarwarslaserbrain]

This pic is art!

[moonsavior]

He'll never beat the allegations.

[jevthejester]

Lazy ass thing i did for no reason but cuz i like these ships

Edit:

[aifoslinrose]

𝑯𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚 1700 𝑫𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 🐙𝑨𝒛𝒖𝒍 𝑨𝒔𝒉𝒆𝒏𝒈𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒕𝒐 𝒙 🌸𝑹𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒂 𝑳𝒊𝒈𝒂𝒚𝒂

❊╌─┈⊰᯽⊱*✨𝙿𝙰𝚂𝚃 𝙿𝚁𝙾𝙼𝙸𝚂𝙴✨*⊰᯽⊱┈─╌❊

𝐼𝑡'𝑠 𝑏𝑒𝑒𝑛 𝑎 𝑤𝑒𝑒𝑘 𝑠𝑖𝑛𝑐𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑒 ℎ𝑢𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑚𝑒𝑟𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑐ℎ𝑖𝑙𝑑 𝑏𝑒𝑐𝑎𝑚𝑒 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑𝑠 𝑎𝑠 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦 𝑎𝑙𝑤𝑎𝑦𝑠 𝑚𝑒𝑒𝑡 𝑢𝑝 𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑒𝑎𝑟𝑏𝑦 𝑠ℎ𝑜𝑟𝑒 𝑡𝑜 𝑝𝑙𝑎𝑦 𝑎𝑛𝑑 ℎ𝑎𝑣𝑒 𝑎 𝑛𝑖𝑐𝑒 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑎𝑏𝑜𝑢𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 𝑑𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑚𝑠 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑑𝑖𝑓𝑓𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒𝑠. 𝑈𝑛𝑡𝑖𝑙 𝑜𝑛𝑒 𝑑𝑎𝑦, 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑙𝑖𝑡𝑡𝑙𝑒 𝑔𝑖𝑟𝑙 𝑡𝑜𝑙𝑑 𝑡𝑜 ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑚𝑒𝑟𝑚𝑎𝑛 𝑓𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑎𝑡 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑦'𝑙𝑙 𝑏𝑒 𝑔𝑜𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑏𝑎𝑐𝑘 𝑡𝑜 𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑖𝑟 ℎ𝑜𝑚𝑒𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑛𝑒𝑥𝑡 𝑑𝑎𝑦 𝑎𝑓𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑎 𝑡𝑤𝑜 𝑤𝑒𝑒𝑘𝑠 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑦 𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 𝑆𝑎𝑔𝑒 𝐼𝑠𝑙𝑎𝑛𝑑...

🐙When will you come back again? Can't you just stay here forever?

🌸I want to, but I can't leave my family alone without me.../𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅/ I'm sorry...

🐙 So...this is our last goodbye then? I...I Guess im going back to being alone again....

🌸/𝒕𝒐𝒖𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒎 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒐𝒐𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒊𝒎/ C'mon don't be so sad about it, I'm sure someone would like to be friends with you-

🐙/𝒔𝒍𝒊𝒑𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒂𝒓𝒎 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒎 𝒉𝒆𝒓, 𝒄𝒓𝒚𝒊𝒏𝒈/ But no one wants to be friends with me! They keep on making fun of me all the time, calling me this slow, stupid, ugly and fat octomerman! /𝒉𝒖𝒈𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎𝒔𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒕𝒆𝒄𝒕𝒊𝒗𝒆��𝒚/ It makes me want to hate myself even more...

🌸Hey dont say that to yourself! They're just jealous of how awesome and smart you are. /𝒔𝒄𝒐𝒐𝒕𝒄𝒉 𝒄𝒍𝒐𝒔𝒆𝒓 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆 𝒉𝒊𝒎/

🐙Y-you think so?

🌸Yup! /𝒏𝒐𝒅𝒔/ You have a great smarty brain on magic in such a very young age like yourself! And you even have a unique talent by using your 8 limbs to do your work fast! /𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒏𝒆𝒔 𝒂𝒔 𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒑𝒍𝒊𝒎𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒎/

🌸And what makes you think you're ugly and fat? You're cute and adorable to me!

🐙/𝒂 𝒑𝒖𝒓𝒑𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒉 𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒔𝒉 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒘𝒔 𝒐𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒆𝒌𝒔/ E-eh?! W-what d-did you say!?

🌸You heard me, you're pretty in everyway! It makes me want to cuddle up with you forever! /𝒔𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒔/

🐙 Y-you're just saying that j-just to m-make me feel better!

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅/ I'm not, I really mean it everything I said! You're just like Mr. Foxy very comfy and squishy to cuddle!

🐙/𝒉𝒆 𝒃𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒌𝒔 𝒕𝒘𝒊𝒄𝒆 𝒊𝒏 𝒔𝒉𝒐𝒄𝒌 𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒂𝒘𝒂𝒚 𝒔𝒐 𝒇𝒍𝒖𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒆𝒅/ I...

🐙…

🐙Can you keep a promise with me then...b-before you leave?

🌸/𝒏𝒐𝒅𝒔/ Sure what is it?

🐙W-will you promise me to never forget me when we got bigger...a-and that we'll always stay by each other's side?

🌸/𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒔 𝒂𝒕 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒑𝒓𝒊𝒔𝒆 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒔𝒎𝒊𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒔𝒐𝒇𝒕𝒍𝒚/ Yes I promise! Oh! Also can I keep a promise to you as well?

🐙 /𝒏𝒐𝒅𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒄𝒖𝒓𝒊𝒐𝒔𝒊𝒕𝒚/ Mn! Sure go ahead!

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒃𝒆𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒐𝒏 𝒐𝒏𝒆 𝒌𝒏𝒆𝒆 𝒊𝒏𝒇𝒓𝒐𝒏𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒊𝒎

/ My promise is that when we meet again... I'll offer your hand in marriage!

🐙/𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒇𝒂𝒄𝒆 𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒏 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒔𝒉 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒋𝒐𝒍𝒕/ M-marriage?? me?! Y-y-you're joking right??

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒉𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒅 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒅𝒆𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒊𝒏𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏 𝒊𝒏 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔/ Nope!

🐙W-why???

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒆𝒇𝒖𝒍𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒖𝒑 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒔𝒊𝒕 𝒃𝒆𝒔𝒊𝒅𝒆 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏, 𝒈𝒆𝒏𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒆𝒛𝒆 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅/ Isn't that obvious? I like you very very much ever since I met you!

If no one likes you than I am, then I'll be the one to love and cherish you more and ever!

🐙/𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒃𝒂𝒃𝒚 𝒃𝒍𝒖𝒆𝒔 𝒆𝒚𝒆𝒔 𝒃𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒐 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒖𝒓𝒒𝒐𝒖𝒊𝒔𝒆 𝒐𝒏𝒆𝒔, 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒂𝒏𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒓𝒔/ Y-You humans are really weird...

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒈𝒊𝒈𝒈𝒍𝒆𝒅, 𝒕𝒂𝒌𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒇𝒇 𝒐𝒇 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒏 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒑𝒐𝒊𝒏𝒕 𝒇𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒆𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒄𝒊𝒏𝒉 𝒊𝒕 𝒐𝒏 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒐𝒄𝒕𝒐𝒃𝒐𝒚'𝒔 𝒑𝒂𝒍𝒎/ Here, take this as a memento of me whenever you're feeling sad. You can make it as your lucky charm If you're having a bad luck too!

🌸 I may not be there beside you but always remember that I'm here for you through all your struggles even tho I'm far away from you... /𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒔 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒄𝒖𝒑 𝒉𝒊𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒆𝒆𝒌𝒔 𝒊𝒏 𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒕 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒂𝒅𝒐𝒓𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏/

🐙/𝒉𝒆'𝒔 𝒕𝒐𝒐 𝒔𝒕𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒆𝒅 𝒕𝒐 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒂𝒌 𝒂𝒔 𝒉𝒆 𝒉𝒖𝒈 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒉𝒂𝒊𝒓𝒆𝒅 𝒈𝒊𝒓𝒍, 𝒍𝒆𝒕𝒕𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒐𝒖𝒕 𝒂 𝒔𝒏𝒊𝒇𝒇𝒍𝒆 𝒄𝒓𝒚/

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒔𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒍𝒆𝒅 𝒃𝒆𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆 𝒉𝒖𝒈𝒈𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒊𝒎 𝒃𝒂𝒄𝒌 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒏 𝒄𝒉𝒖𝒄𝒌𝒍𝒆𝒔/ aww are you crying again, Zuzu?~

🐙/𝒑𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒔/ I-im not! And s-stop calling—/𝒔𝒏𝒊𝒇𝒇/ me t-that!

🌸/𝒔𝒉𝒆 𝒍𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕𝒍𝒚 𝒍𝒂𝒖𝒈𝒉𝒔, 𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒉𝒆𝒓 𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒐𝒏 𝒉𝒊𝒔/ whatever you say Zuzu!~

❊╌─┈⊰᯽⊱*✨ᴇɴᴅ✨*⊰᯽⊱┈─╌❊

[ladyofvoss]

Year of the OTP 2023

April - Canon Divergence

Content Warning! - Mentions of death and blood

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

This wasn’t supposed to happen.

She was supposed to be safe in Ishgard. It was why he had taken this risk. Had all but begged his father to give her and her companions asylum. It was why he had bound himself to her in matrimony, to give her as much protection as he could.

She was supposed to be safe.

~

“Did I not tell you to have faith, my friend?”

~

He should have seen it, Ser Zephirin perched on the parapets, readying his weapon, taking aim. 

He should have been faster, should have put himself between her and the fatal blow, even if it meant his own death.

But he wasn’t.

The spear had pierced her heart. Within a single moment, she was gone.

~

“Do not hesitate to call upon me, no matter the hour...”

~

Blood, there was so much blood. It stained the silver chainmail of his armor. It stained the stones beneath their feet. It stained the thick leather of his gloves. 

He fumbled with the clasps, bit into one of the fingers to wrench the glove off with his teeth, just to press the bare skin of his hand against her neck in the hopes, however weak it was, that he would be met with the thrum of her pulse, or the warm flush of her skin.

But she was cold. Cold and very still.

~

“You would truly risk life and limb for Ishgard?”

“It’s your home, isn’t it?”

~

I’xiris’s anguished wails still pierced the air, even as Estinien physically removed the mi’qote girl and an inconsolable Alphinaud. 

“I can....I can heal her....” “Alphinaud....”

“I can save her! Estinien please!”

Undeterred, he had carried them, literally kicking and screaming, back into the Vault.

They could not see. They were still children, they could not see....

~

“Aren’t you afraid, Haurche?”

“No. After all, I have you, don’t I?”

~

“Haurchefant....” Aymeric croaked, and over the ringing in his ears, he could hear the devastation in his voice. “Haurchefant....I......I am so sorry....”

“No....”, he pleaded. He could barely recognize his own voice, broken as it was. He couldn’t look at his friend. He couldn’t look at any of them. Not when his love, his light, his life Thalia was lying still and lifeless in his arms.

“Please. Please leave me”

Aymeric’s strangled sob was the last thing he registered before Lucia took the Lord Commander by the arm and carefully guided him away. 

~

“What is it?”

“Nothing. I’m just......I’m glad to have known you, Haurchefant”

“And I you, my love”

~

He was alone now, the air still and silent around him. Then, and only then, on the empty airship landing, did Haurchefant Greystone let out a soul wrenching cry of agony as he mourned.

~~~

In which Haurchefant Lives™ , but it all goes terribly, terribly wrong.

[im-no-jedi]

hehe… had extra paint from repainting my figure’s lips, so I decided to make Hunter’s helmet more accurate to my story 🥰😘

[look-a-draw]

I did nothing for Valentine I’m sorry Please accept this redraw of my OTP

Happy Valentines Day~ 

[capsensislagamoprh]

Victor slid across the ice, blades cutting feather thin lines into its fresh shine. His movements were graceful, fluid, full of possibilities. He was going to gather glamour, he would put it to good use. He would get a hold of the oracle and an interpreter. Or he'd learn Chinese. Ether way.

Gliding, arms turning out, slowly lifting towards the sky, palms arched in reverence, Victor imagined the rain of snow that kissed his skin when ever he felt a fresh dream. He drew his arms in, cupping his heart thrugh his chest, long hair flowing beside his face like a vale of silver ice. His feet arched, one over the other as he gained speed. He jumped. The spin felt natural. It landed clean. A triple. He followed it with a moments notice, a double taking him to the next step sequence. He could feel himself, face mussels and long limbs burning like cold flame. The music covered him in kisses made of dead men, there inspiration caught in the air, Victor's to interpret.

His hips bent as his back arched, toe loop step, fluid hands. Toe loop - try to be en pointe, use that toe pick - step, powerful sweeping motions as you flow that twizzle into a sit spin. Pull it into a lay-back... use your core mussels to rise into a scratch. Step sequence as you convey, emote. Use your whole body. Your face. Don't forget the grace of your line...

"VICTOR!" Yakov screamed into the void. A silver head snapped around as his blades cut a sharp C, stopping himself from continuing. Flicking his stakes as he glided towards the grumpy man, he once again wondered if he wasn't a very well hidden knocker.

"Yes, Yakov," he purred. "Something I can help you with?"

"Arch your back more. You're toe is to low, and your twizzle looked like you weren't even trying. Air, Victor! Air! Look like you're gliding yes, but you should fly!"

Victor felt his smile plaster on. "Sure, Yakov. I can do that." He could almost feel Madame Baranovskaya staring him down, telling him to not waste the dross on something bound to get him tested for sanity.

It goes like this in practice for hours. He's not ready to get off the ice. He knows he can do more. He knows he can make another rotation on his Salchow. But reality is going to gobble him up feet first if he doesn't shower, eat, and hang around people with actual imaginations.

He's not sure what to do. What he knows is that sometimes children let loose dreams. They play in the parks and on the streets. They bounce about pretending fantasies so powerful they taste like sweet cream. Umm, sweet cream. A pastries. Trubochki? Vatrushka maybe? Milk and honey, a basic thing to fey, a kin to vitamins in humans. Mother's milk, warm and welcoming. Damn. He was starving.

Walking to Primorskiy Park, Victor watched the sky, felt the cold, smelled the air, and watched his step. The shadows were trying to cling to him again, trying to warn him of something. He wasn't sure what it was, but for a moment he thought he heard someone laugh, smelled the scent of chocolate, and then it faded. Shaking his silver locks, Victor watched as children played, their screams little more than an echo at the highest end of sound.

Sitting on the frosty bench, Victor looked at the children, their parents keeping lax eyes as the water fountains played with the empty spaces. He'd got his pasties, was about to indulge in a powered sugar covered delight when - like the right hand of Madame Baranovskaya herself - came chaos and sound the likes of which he's not experienced before.

Several small dogs chased a rather large Siberian Husky right over the bench he sat, across the bag of goodies, over his entire form, with one rather enterprising spaniel slamming a muddy paw right across his forehead. It was disappointing. It was disgusting. It was shocking. It... surprised him. He hadn't been surprised since he came to the material realm. How exhilarating!

He could feel himself lift from the soul up. His insides were floating on a glowing tide of power, fueling his innate abilities. A slow, steady snow began to fall. People began to gather their children and animals. They fled to the places snow was not supposed to go. And Victor laughed.

Marvelous! What joy! What was that creature? Could he get one? He must have one! Smile brighter than the cloud covered sun, Victor rose, eyes bright with liquid delight as he whispered with glee, "I must have a chaos animal! Where do I get one?"

He'd use the computer to find a place to get a cleaner animal. One as well breed as himself, and just a much of a joy as the muddy print in the middle of his head.

part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10, part 11, part 12, part 13, part 14, part 15, part 16, part 17, part 18, part 19, part 20, part 21, part 22

[zuzuelectricbugaloo]

Tête-à-Tête: Trois

Rating: Teen

Synopsis: Epic takes his shot. Nightmare underestimates his depravity.

CW: Epic temporarily dies and returns to life. Its played for comedic purposes by both Epic and the narrative, but understandably is unenjoyable

Word Count: 2, 108

Part 1, 2, 3 of A Guardian, A Scientist, and A Parlay

“First up, Cross ain’t nearly as verbose as you, for realzies.” Epic remarked. He leaned himself against the chair with his arms crossed behind his head.

Nightmare blinked. “Realzies?” 

“F’r real f’r real. Ya vibe check?” He gave a thumbs down and blew a raspberry. “Failed. An’ usin’ dat boomer ta get to me? His vibes’re straight up rancid, spittin’ straight facts wi’ dat, not gonna lie, but yo. You’re throwin’ all dat shade at me like I ain’t already drownin’ on my own.” 

Nightmare was stunned. “Is…is this a mental breakdown? A crisis of some kind?” Bewildered, he wondered, “What are you saying?”

“Just dat we could be real sigma skibidi slicers but ya got all da Ohio and none o’da rizzler.

“Is this a stroke? Can your kind have strokes?”

“I’m sayin’ what I’m sayin’, ya dig?”

“Saying what?”

Epic’s eyes crinkled into upturned crescents. “Sayin’ like a straight up Saiyan lmao.”

Nightmare’s eye twitched. “You’re saying what?!”

“Naaaah, I ain’t Saiyan, bruh! I’m jus’ sayin’ what I’m sayin’.”

Before Nightmare could give in to the urge and leap across the table to strangle him with his bare hands, Epic inquired, “Whatcha reading?”

It’s random enough that it throws the guardian off kilter and he answers honestly, “The Picture of Dorian Gray.” 

“Aw sheeet, really?” Epic whistled lowly, impressed. “Dat one’s wild. Mah best bruh wuz so uptst bowt Basil, brah, an’ I’m wit’ him mahn. If it weren’t foh dat one bastard, Dorian an’ Basil would’ve behn OTP an’ everiethin wud be sunshine an’ rainbuws.”

“If you wish for this game to be played well, lest at all,” Nightmare spat irritably, “Then use that silver tongue well instead of spouting rot like an illiterate.”

“Hmm, ya got me.” Epic waved his gloved hands in a mimicry of jazz. “But foh one as well-versed as u, sureleh u can rerd betwehn teh lines?”

Nightmare huffed. “Ah yes,” he rolled his eye, “asinine nonsense is so worth the effort of parceling though. Last warning.” 

His tendrils sharpened, razor-edged tints gleaming menacingly within the tarred corruption, “Speak proper or invoke your own pain.”

“Aw,” Epic pouted. “An’ I was jus’ ‘bout to tell ya about the Sigma of the Ohio, gooning to the gyat—” 

SHINK!

“Oh would ya look at dat.��� Epic said cheerfully. “I’ve been impaled.”

Epic hummed. Idly poking the tendril jutting out of him, he scrubbed the viscous tar that clung to the edge of his distals and curiously brought it to his mouth. Nightmare’s narrowed eye widened, gaping as he watched in dumbfounded silence as Epic licked his mouth in quick, kittenish blips whilst cleaning the distal phalanx of the corruption coating it with his tongue. 

“Huh. Tastes like bitter apple tart.” He mused. 

Nightmare’s mouth opened and closed. Epic was blathering something about “bridges” and desiring more “polin” moments within adapted screenplay, but any comprehension of his commentary was lost in the storm of the supposed guardian’s tumultuous thoughts. 

Such strange, utterly perplexing behavior. To what purpose? To what end? Didn’t the novels purport that tasting another was a means of enticement? Erego, was this…flirting? 

Was seduction this truly beguiling bastard’s method of further confoundment? 

“I’m not interested!” He snapped. It was most certainly not an undignified squawk! 

“Huh?” Epic slow-blinked in confusion. “What — oh. Oh. Oh, honey,” Epic guffawed. “You’re so not my type.” 

“Excuse you?!”

“You’re excused babes.” 

SHINK! 

Epic’s impudence earned him another impalement of the tentacle persuasion, yet his shit-eating grin remained, entirely unfazed by the two razored tendrils protruding from his abdomen and the fuchsia blood that dripped out the corners of his mouth. 

“I like ‘em cuter than you,” Epic simpered. “And a lot more fun ta hang wit’.” 

Nightmare sneered, unimpressed. “What, like Ccino?”

The skeleton hummed in contemplation. “Waz thinkin’ ‘bout someone else, but Bunbun is mad cute tbh. Mehbe a coffee date or two, if Ccino was down, he’s such a snacc dat he ate and left no crumbs. Did ya see those bunny ears on his hoodie? Ugh, totes adorbs. Ngl I just wanna squish dem kawaii cheeks on dat cute face an’ nomnomnom. Prolly tastes like mochi.”

Nightmare’s eye twitched. He wondered if corrupted pseudo skeleton pyro-elemental demigods could have aneurysms.

And promptly mulled after that over his inaugural desire of wanting to strangle someone with his bare hands and not his tentacles.

“Aw, don’t be jelly jus’ cuz ya don't get mey magic goeng. I mean jus’ look atcha bruh.” Epic gestured to Nightmare. “What’s da dealio wit’ yo’ threads, brah?” 

The utter nerve of this mongrel! “My attire is impeccable—”

“Bitch please. Ain’t even tryin’ to level up ya L ratio wi’ cheugy an’ went all muggy.”

Nightmare’s eye twitched.

“Totally gonna kiki wi’ Sugar later when we’re sharin’ da T an’ laughin’ ova ya discolored hobo basic bitch Sans lookin’ ass—”

SHINK!

Fuschia blood splattered onto the table cloth, discoloring the porcelain in sanguine blotches. “Wow, ya really dig impaling me, huh? Try an’ keep it in ya pants Hentainess.”

Infuriating, knavish, orgiastically lush myopic bastard!

“How dare you! I am a god above you miserable ants, and I will crush you like the bug you are—!”

“Ha, frfr? King of negativity?” Epic snickered derisively. “Moar liek keng of trash ya basic, overrated, goopy takoyaki beta cuc—”

SHINK!

SHINK!

SHINK!

The lights flickered, cats hissing and meowing as a few dogs barked and ran with their friends elsewhere as the shadows converged, bathing the room in darkness. From the shadows Nightmare loomed, tentacles writhing angrily behind his amorphous form as he loomed above Epic, his infuriated snarl separating his face into petals of viscera as raggedly sharp teeth shook with his roar, row after row of fangs converging into a spiral deep within the darkness of his mouth as he shrieked in rage. 

SHINK!

SHINK!

SHINK!

His undulating tentacles converged, rapidly piercing through Epic’s body in a brutal series of strikes until Nightmare paused, chest heaving whilst his form trembled with fury, and multiple tentacles protruded from Epic’s chest. From the wounds fuchsia stained his soft cable-knit sweater, soaking the material and damaging it irreparably. 

Epic coughed, blood pouring from his mouth. He reached for his napkin to wipe his mouth as he continued to hack up more and more of the viscous fluid and clear his false throat.

Still, the sight wasn’t nearly enough to appease the enraged Guardian, eyelight a deadly slit as he hissed, his forked tongue flickering between his fangs.

“I will make you suffer a slow, miserable death surrounded by the remains of the ones you love you wretched, perverse—!”

“Ooooooh, yeeeeees,” Epic arched his back, his purr more of a garbled, cluttered sound from metaphysical lungs drowning in blood. “Stab me harder octodaddy~” He rasped.

…

WHAT.

THE.

FU—

Viscerally jolting, Nightmare gaped, immediately retracting all his tentacles in one abrupt pull that made Epic’s body slam head first onto the table. Nonexistent mind bloated with static clogged his hearing, the disgruntling sound of cervical vertebrae breaking going unheard, Epic’s body stilling.

It didn’t matter that he hadn’t sensed an iota of lust from Epic in what was clearly an act to unsettle him. The mere fact that someone would be so uncouth — with his (technically) body parts inside them — and then say that — !

He felt so, so unclean.

While Nightmare gagged, dryly retching to the side of the table, body racked by terrorized shudders and a nonexistent gut determined to upheave its contents, Epic slowly rose from the table with a groan. 

His head jolted, flinging itself far to the side and then back to the center in a sharp crack as his broken neck repaired itself, blood and bones squelching amid a miniscule vortex of swirling dust. His right socket was empty, only the haunting magenta of his Eye lighting up his scarred socket and illuminating the void within his skull as his body continued to crack and convulse.

Broken ribs and pseudo flesh winded and converged in brilliant, blinding spirals of mana, abruptly reforming to its previous state of matter from the fallen dust of its body.

When his ribs cracked back into place Epic’s eyelight returned and he sighed, rolling his head and shoulders with a low groan before he jolted one last time as consciousness and bodily autonomy were regained. 

“Shit, that was a new way to die.” Epic coughed, clearing his throat of lingering dust. “What was that? Death number 20,000? 60,000?” It was rhetorical. Not like Nightmare would’ve known, or be deigned to answer anyway, teal blush betraying his conflicted though largely horrified emotions. 

“Can’t say it was original though. My old man stabbed me to death once. Though it was with bones instead of tentacles. Hmm. Anyways. Ya good there?”

Nightmare stared back at him, unseeing. Slowly rocking back and forth in an upright fetal position. “Your mind is filthy.”

“Lmao, if you think that joke was bad you should see my hentai zines.”

Nightmare was about to give in and leap across the table to strangle him with his bare hands when Epic caught him off guard yet again, swiftly diverging their conversation. 

“Oh hey, speaking of the unappreciated arts, do ya like poetry?”

Wary, Nightmare enunciated slowly, “...yes?”

“Coolio, mind if I get your unbiased third party perspective on this little ditty I made for my homies?” Epic posed dramatically, one hand over his Soul and the other resting atop his foreskull. “Gotta let ya homebois know they’re appreciated. Ahem!”

He began, cadence low and melodic as though the prose he spun were Shakespeare’s finest. But what came out of his mouth that had Nightmare tasting rainbows in his mouth was:

“Ain’t nobody betta den da GOAT, da squad dat’s on fleek.”

Nightmare had long lost the hope of deciphering the madness that fell from his questionably silver tongue and could only watch helplessly, a haunted gleam in his eye as Epic butchered vernacular with a charming grin and cheerfully set its corpse aflame.

“U got da whole Chromatic Crew hustlin’, dis fam don’t play baby we stay bussin’! Full o’ peeps dat are straight up cuties, no cap, got dem gucci an’ menty b vibes. Da Skittles Squad are da best, no jive!” 

Jumping atop his seat, Epic concluded his recital with a flourished bow, curtsying and bowing as cats and dogs meowed and barked in applause. Or they were glad he was safe after Nightmare killed him. Hard to say.

Epic caught a rose that was thrown at him with his teeth and winked in the direction it was thrown in. He blew a kiss as he waved, the skeleton that had thrown the flower blushing shyly and ducking back to his corner at having been noticed. 

“TY, TY,” Epic thanked as he sat back down, “Prayer hands and heart emojis fo’ all y’all.”

Nightmare blinked away the odd stinging in his eye. He wiped his socket dry, then gazed down at the translucent water on his claw. He was…crying??

“What in hell?”

“Yee I tend ta have dat effect.”

Nightmare lifted his stare to Epic, saying nothing.

“Oh, dat reminds me.” Epic pulled out 20G from his inventory and shoved the coins into his pocket. “Note to self: pay back KitKat later fo’ Skittlez.”

Nightmare already knew he’d regret asking, yet still, the cerebration of unknowing anything plagued him, and he slowly queried, “A what?”

“Skittles Squad! Kill la Kill coined it, so I owe him now.”

“...What.”

“Yep, patented it and everything.”

Nightmare resisted the way his false throat tickled, fearing that if he coughed, he’d see a rainbow splattered all over his claw. Disbelieving, his eye pierced the dichotomy of a grin so sweet and endearing and somehow irritatingly cocky and frivolous all in one. 

How much more of this inane babble could he withstand? Truly, whose will would ever be able to gaze into the pandemonic abyss of this clearly unwell mind and maintain its sanity?

“I also wrote a Vocaloid fan song in case my ultimate waifu, GILF Miku, ever came to life and wanted to date —”

He knew one thing for certain: he’d been violated mentally long enough.

“STOP!” Nightmare roared beseeched. “Just — stop!” He put his head in his hands, both to make sure blood wasn’t leaking from his acoustic meatus and to carry his weary skull. “I implore you, Epic...Stop.”

He’d had enough. 

Epic’s smile remained as his eyelights glittered somberly. 

He set the rose that he’d been fiddling with in his hands gently down on the table and leaned back in his chair. “Do you concede defeat?”

[im-no-jedi]

funny modding update. I have to wait for the green stuff to dry before moving on to the other shoe, so I’m stuck in this position for a few hours. Hunter is trying to give me moral support; babe, I need physical support rn ROFL

[frostedpuffs]

eVENING MAH LOVE <3

🦗🤷‍♀️🐸🙊🤩

HELLO DARLIN'

🦗Do you write in sequence or jump around?

USUALLY in sequence because it helps me make sure my chapters mesh well together. HOWEVER, for ppu, I jumped around a lot!!! which was a lot of fun but ultimately led me to have to scrap/change stuff later so for my next fic I am also going to write by sequence

🤷‍♀️What's a fic you didn't expect to be popular, but really took off?

i answered this with ppu earlier, but another fic that I didn't expect to get popular AT ALL was truthful scars, the very first ml fanfic I ever wrote. it's now considered a popular fandom "classic" which just BLOWS my mind. if anyone wants to read it do so at your own risk knowing it was written by a 17 year old who barely had a grasp on the characters' personalities LOL

🐸 If you incorporated your OTP into a Disney movie plot, which would it be?

TANGLED. TANGLED. TANGLED. ADRIEN AS RAPUNZEL AND MARINETTE AS FLYNN RIDER/EUGENE FITZHERBERT. PLEASE AND THANK YOU

🙊Your coworkers or classmates stumble across one of your fics, but don't know you're the author. Do you fess up? Or keep quiet?

answered here 💗

🤩 What's the most meaningful comment you've ever received?

i don't know if I can pick one out of them all (mostly because my adhd has made me forget), but I will say I have a special soft spot for long comments that go into depth about why they like what I wrote. i love all comments of course, but those really stick with me. and of course YOUR comments akari, I love reading them so much <3

here are some of my favorites from ppu chapter 39 :)

of course i've loved ALL the comments I've received and I never ever delete any of them, I hoard them all in my inbox so I can reread them whenever I want. I've been doing this for years. i mean it when I say I hoard them

FIC WRITER ASKS

[zumpietoo]

I only believe some of it tbh. Not saying I think they're lying but I just wish they gave more details and it wasn't fuzzy, as I'm sure Madelaine did know and did try to tell Cole (since she and Lili shared an apartment at a time, also Madelaine has always expressed her preference between the two, it's evident in interviews) we know Lili had multiple ppl fired off the show because she was jealous and unfollowed the entire cast multiple times because she's petty asf, then followed them back because they were ALL about to unfollow her.

I also find it funny when Lili's stans try to say he abused her and Bree. Because Bree was called out for lying by her own friends as well as his, and she HERSELF admitted to lying about it then deleted all the posts before Cole got the chance to take legal action. Plus, Lili herself debunked the abuse claims and cheating claims MULTIPLE times, said her poetry was fiction then tried to backtrack when Cole started dating Ari. Lili and Jack's EYES tell you how mean they are. Cole's eyes show emotional damage but also kindness, as do Ari's.

Oh I agree with all of this.....also.....

Once again, that they're now "friends" speaks volumes and not in the way PPstans have persuaded themselves (in fact, dudes, where's all that "tea" they were gonna spill/"receipts" they had, etc, hmmm????)---because, again, Breetch is the person who used to stalk, cosplay and bully the Peepster verrrryyyyy publicly....but now PP cosplays/bullies Ari publicly and these two are friends.

Tells you EVERYTHING....

Here's moar:

Ironically. posted JUST after the election.....dude, go worry about the fuckin' collapse of democracy----or even how the tariffs will be spurring inflation AND a looming recession, so nobody's gonna have ANY $$$ to buy your already overpriced snake oil and it'll fail....please don't bother with your pathetic bad pop psychology because a dude dumped your ass 4 years ago....

Apparently she also (I can't find it in the DMs that were sent to me rn) also posted that bullshit of "what emotional abuse looks like"----which, literally, translates to "didn't make myself/my headcase issues the center of their existence"....and, ofc, ironically, means she's confessed SHE'S an emotional abuser, too....(because we all know she absolutely DGAF about the other person, everrrr....).

I just love first world problems, basic self-involved neurotic bitches....there's a bit of this at work rn, my co-worker is a big old mess and has decided since she is a big old mess, this translates to everyone must accommodate her moods and she is thusly very deep and sensitive....when, honestly? She's just a rude, selfish asshole.

To your last points about Cabana Poop:

Are they ever NOT the world's most awkward, chemistry-free "couple"?????

Fun fact, Claudia got me fully hooked on X-Men (the animated series) and we're now watching X-Men 97......Cabana Pee is as fake, forced and awkward as nearly every ship on that show (and again, we're talking cartoons, here!). excepting OFC, mah nu OTP, Romy (which I'll post on in a bit), CP is as bad, if not worse than:

A) Poor Storm and every dude they stick her with, that she's "in love with" in 4 seconds, including when she, a woman of color, was "in love" with the guy who really dug slavery.

B) Professor X (who is totally teh ghey with Magneto and you will NOT convince me otherwise) and all the ladies they try to force him with, including that stupid ugly alien empress chick nobody asked for

C) Rogue and Magneto.....he's old and teh ghey and like she'd really even consider everrrr dumping the ultimate freakin' man for that just because it meant she'd get the D.

Not only do SweatBoi eyes say "mean", but he's also fuckin' hideous

Why does PP think it makes her seem "glamorous" to share they went to the movies and that her "man" sounds kinda teh ghey? Is it so people won't feel bad for him that she cucked him with Mishel on Halloween?

Dude, we all get it's all truly staged this time, no need to keep pretending

[freezethunder]

For the ask game... hmmmm... I don't believe I've seen your thoughts on mah gurl Himiko Yumeno!

How I feel about this character

Ever since I found out there was going to be an Ultimate Magician in V3, i was through the roof. Because I had my own Ultimate Magician OC, I was curious to see how they would make this character work. And let me tell you: I was not expecting Mage Chiaki to be the direction they went with the concept. But I still love her nonetheless. Himiko develops so much over the course of the game that how anyone views her as a useless survivor is beyond me. Starting out with being lazy and hiding her feelings to living life positively and working her hardest to survive with the others(as positive and hardworking as she can be...). Himiko may be my favorite "joke" survivor, beating Kazuichi and Yasuhiro in those categories. Not only because she's really funny, but also she because she has a character to her, and just as much a reason to push forward along with everyone else.

All the people I ship romantically with this character

Let's see here, there's Tenko and Angie, obviously. Maki's pretty cute. I do like her and Kokichi when I'm not implementing my own little headcanons into the mix. And uh....I think that's it.

My non-romantic OTP for this character

Ummm....not really sure. I imagine her hanging out with Chiaki could be pretty fun, the two taking naps a lot. Maybe her hanging out with Gundam for dark arts stuff. And her with Shuichi is a cute friendship.

My unpopular opinion about this character

Yes. Himiko did like Tenko before Chapter 3. The two have a "no energy, too much energy" relationship. They are NOTHING like Touko with Byakuya, or Kazuichi with Sonia.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

People like to draw characters with items that their beloved partner had before they died. I.E Hajime with Chiaki's hairpin, Maki with Kaito's jacket, etc. Himiko should have gotten something from Tenko. Like a belt or a robe or her pinwheel hair thing. It probably wouldn't be too much I'm imagining, I just like this trope.

[tinyevelyn]

ChameleonKitty my new otp AUGH

Phenomenal

AAAAHH THANK YOU!!!!

they're not much but i do love them, and i love mah boi💖💖💖

[hillsblanket]

Greetings good friend! I am delighted that someone shares my passion for my OTP ship, Billary. It's so lonely having no one to share adorkable photos with, crazily watching and reading everything on Bill Clinton and Hillary Clinton. I have so much to say on the two, but no one to hold a deep intellectual conversation with. I appreciate what you do, and I love your page! I would love to talk to you about anything related to the two. Good day my friend! Take care!

oh mah gahd girllll, thanks!