#maggot muncher

[anti-terf-posts]

hey scotty, did you know that fiona and me do it in my van every sunday? /ly

im sorry i just couldnt resist 😔

OMG REALLY 😱😱😱

[eagle-head-charge]

The only Eagles I know of are PRIVATE MAGGOT MUNCHER and the ONES ON THE COAT OF ARMS! ...I can't tell if that was him, it's too close to night-time! He's probably going home to his nest!

Soldier.

I thought I heard you yelling. What is it this time?

I SAW AN EAGLE!! I needed you OUTSIDE to come SALUTE to it, Frenchie! er, wait, maybe it was just a bird...

[synesindri]

Everytime I scroll past a post of yours I go "maggot muncher??? Hell yeah" before I reread and realize that's not what your name is

i could be a monger for maggot munching! who is to say! chomp chomp babey

[rengineer]

HI SOLDIER?? Wait.. question...do you also collect raccoons and make them into an army or is that only your RED counterpart?? Regardless! You look very festive at least

"AN ARMY OF RACCOONS?! HA! SUCH TACTICS ARE BEST LEFT TO MY RED COUNTERPART AND HIS DELUSIONS OF FURRY DOMINANCE!" He pauses, crossing his arms with a thoughtful nod. "I COMMAND NO SUCH CREATURES, BUT IF I DID, THEY WOULD BE THE MOST DISCIPLINED AND FEROCIOUS RACCOONS THIS WORLD HAS EVER SEEN!"

He then gestures grandly at his holiday-decorated uniform. "AND OF COURSE I LOOK FESTIVE! A TRUE SOLDIER PREPARES FOR EVERY BATTLE, EVEN THE BATTLE OF HOLIDAY SPIRIT! NOW, WHO WANTS TO SING WAR-THEMED CAROLS?!"

"OH hello, Private Maggot Muncher. " He proceeded to casually greet an eagle that had suddenly flown in and perched on his shoulder.

[suiciderape]

legal binder mechanheeow

ew ur daddy will pick u around u cant see juliet stalking u in a twerk dress in the lunch room at ghetto noon ok ur dumb ew u fucked! me ew ur bad at this ghetto luv hahaha daddys coming to get u open ghetto hollins is in the bldg ghetto daddy is in the bldg lava mcgee? ew ur fliting with me nah ok byee hii hey omg ur cute charcutirie ew ur badass getting death threats blue hair dye? instagram san antonio pictures hahaha ur still talking to jisung nct dreamer ew! why? no it was him ew 1980s suicide boys skateboard with me at the chinese hood ew ur a faggot dick muncher awkward desarae! ur a badass bitch open tha huh uh huh huh uh *gs* uhhh! laady macbeth 1980s lady macbeth suicide lady macbeth suicide boys bye bye clu b? awkward ew ok so get out of the club by masturbating in the envelope addressed to the hollins family ew ur ghetto real i thought it was magee what are u driving? ew i get but what are u driving? samsung galaxy z flip 3 suicide boys- we like u ghetto much but ur hurting our pride we like u so much but ur ghetto pride hurtz ew ur badass so we like to program u yas ok so go on chanhee pop me- were good dude amd we love pss ew ur baddass and we love ur sexy school girl chanhee chanhee chanhee ew ur a dick muncher ew ur a dick ew hi hot boi ew ur a faggot mexican and greek asian twerk baddie ooh ooh hahaha! ew awkward hahaha geto over here hollins is a slut hahaha why ew ur a faggot ew ur a dick muncher maggot ew ur a slut surf! cypress chanhee mt st helens chris 1980s suicide boy angel insider ew ur a faggot preachor

ew what was that shit? keeho mhua ew ur a dango dinger ew ur a v dezmond hollins is in the bld fr? yes were coming tonight ghetto tonight? yes ghetto tonight hahaha we love ur sexy words ur so good at typing are u a robot? rob zombie liverr ew ur gay as hell its sweet mexican liver ew 1980s suicide boys! ew ur a faggo5 get away 5 punK dead dead dead! dead dead chanhee getoA geto geto geto geto

chanhee- what what what what what what shes typing so fast and who has the time to learn how to type like that ur ugly ur fat and stupid cunt were going home we like ur cunt races no were not lying ur going too fast we dont like he44 ew ur gay ew ur a faggot ew u suck ew u cant type that fast without being suicidal faggo5 fuxk its boring were going home dezmond is not in my family leave me alone faggot bitch

suicide gi3l - geto real its scary we u fuck ur pussy hard skank whore die bitch literally die its paranoid kys 2

what a ghetto bitch slut whore ur gonna die with a dildo in ur pussy im trying to save my life faggot donut remember what i said about putting my pussy in ur mouth? immiment death desarae hollins doesnt exist

she screamed my name beat her ass bitch! nah im real mad at u im trying to commit suicide corpo skeeter

faggot rocked launcher ew u fucking suck dick desarae! desarae!

[redoqs]

This is for the mf’s that think while people are oppressed and experience racism, SHUT YOUR:

𝐀

albino monkey

albedo

arctic menace

alabaster geckos

albino skinwalker

ashewo

ash crickets

amebo

aje

ashiere  

arindin

apoda

𝐁

baby powder

baking soda slugs

beach flamingos

birch trees

borax bites

bleached cheezits

bird caca

blanco bullies

bleached flip flops

baboons without fur

bland baboons

bleach demons

blizzard bliss

blancs

bone thugs

borax bats

𝐂

cauliflower conquerers

cauliflower pigeons

chrome startup screen

cauliflower crunchers

casper crickets

condensation calamities

chewed spearmint gum

coleslaw

columbus cadets

cave dwellers

chalk children

chalk chihuahuas

chalk chimps

ceiling fan

cloudy with a chance of colonization

children of the chalk

clear people

cultureless neanderthals

cum stain

cum skinned goblins

cigarette buds

cocaine monkey

coconut cocoos

coconut shavings

cornstarch crusaders

cotton ball flies

cotton swabs

cumstaint colonizers

colonizer

colombochauns

colourless cockroaches

corn starch

cousin lovers

cream cheese

cream confederate

crystal methamphetamine powdered iguanas

christopher columbus stans

casper the ghost

cracker barrel

cement walls

cloud chompers

cheese curds

clorox conquerors

cherry gatorade

crest extreme whitening toothpaste

culture vultures

cornstarch snakes

chlorine community

𝐃

dandruff clumps

discord light mode

death eaters

discharge doritos

discharge snow drop

discharge donkeys

discharge stains

discharge cosplay

discharge doggies

discharge gremlins

dandruff flakes

dove soap

default paint

deodorant stain

dog daters

dog kissers

dry chicken munchers

dry wall

dust mites

dutch dummies

𝐄

enemy of the sun

elmers glue

elbow ash

eggplant without the skin

eqinsu ocha

expired cheese

expired milk

𝐅

feta cheese folks

flavourless oatmeal

flavourless twinkies

flashback mary

flour fleas

flour power

frost feind

frosted opossums

foam cups

funky dime smelling bitch

𝐆

greek yogurt

garlic goblin

ghost thugs

gora (horse in Hindu)

grandpa’s pubes

𝐇

hueless crayons

hueless hooligans

high spf sun factor 50/50

𝐈

ice chimp

ice mice

iron golems

infecting wipes

iphone chargers

iphone light mode

ivory individuals

ice scorpions

inkless markers

𝐉

jeff the killers

jizzy delinquents

jar of mayo

jackie crackies

jelly babies with too much powder

𝐊

keeho’s white wall

ku klux karen

ku klux kleenex

kleenex klumps

���

la llorona

lice attractors

lice breeders

lice factories

light mayonnaise

light mode

livestock

low fat milks

𝐌

marshmallow fellows

maggots

marshmallow minions

milk crickets

milk man

milk maggots

milk muncher

modge podge

minecraft ghast

milk beetle

mozzarella cheese

mayo packets

mayo monkeys

mayo skunk

mayosapiens

mcdonald’s cup lid

mayonnaise murderers

melaninly challenged

mosquito larvae

𝐍

no seasoning seagulls

no purpose flour

nail clippings

naked rambutan

napkin american

𝐎

oyinbo

ode oshi

omo ale

ori buruku

oniranu

onisekuse

ode buruku

ode

obun

oloshi

olodo

𝐏

palm coloured ones

paperback

paper people

people of colonial complexion

people of no colour

pillsbury dough boys

pillsbury pillager

pigment challenged beast

pink africans

powdered donuts

popcorn ceiling

powder rangers

powdered crickets

powdered roaches

porcelain possums

poorly powdered doughnuts

printer paper

plain toast

polar bears

privileged primates

pwc(people without color)

peeled chicken nuggets

𝐐

q-tips

quails without color

𝐑

rabies foam

ranch guzzlers

ranch opossum

ranch raccoons

ranch rats

ranch roach

rice rats

rice rascals

𝐒

salt rocks

saltine cracka

salt shaker

salty scallywags

saltine

sand crabs

seasonably challenged people

sentient snowmen

sheepskin

silentos silencers

snow apes

snow bunnies

seasonedn’t

snicker lickers

snow opossum

snow rat

snow roach

snow toads

snow worm

sour cream gorillas

sour cream n onion

sour cream snakes

sour patch pilgrims

styrofoam balls

snow tribe

stanky ashes

silverfish mutations

styrofoam sickness

sundown sisters

sun poisoned serpents

𝐓

table salt tammies

teabag trespassers

thin lipped chalk child

tighty whitey

toilet paper travellers

toilet seat

teabag trespassers

translucent powder

translucent troglodyte

translucent tyrants

𝐔

useless crayon

uncoloured orangutan

uncoloured skittles

untitled document

undeveloped sperm

unedited google docs

unseasoned chicken

unused pad

unwhipped cream

𝐕

vanilla pudding cups

vanilla cricket

vanilla gorillas

vanilla vultures

vanilla villagers

vanilla wafers

volcano ash

𝐖

walking recessive genes

wendigos

wiggerely wiggers

whipped cream armadillos

white board

white mutation

white neanderthals

white-out monkeys

white pus

wet dogs

walking dandruff

white trash

wannabe pocs

white tongue

white walker

wonder bread

𝐗

xanax blocks

xenophobic xylophones

𝐘

y'allternatives / y'allts

yogurts yodellers

yeast yeti

yeast yodellers

𝐙

zebra lacking stripes

zit insides

MOUTH. :)

Discharge Doritos?!?!?!,😭😭😭😭

[kenvais]

names for the white ones 😋

@katsdni

𝐀

albino monkey

albedo

absence of color

arctic menace

alabaster geckos

albino skinwalker

ashewo

ash crickets

amebo

aje

ashiere

arindin

apoda

𝐁

baby powder

baking soda slugs

beach flamingos

birch trees

borax bites

bleached cheezits

bird caca

blanco bullies

bleached flip flops

baboons without fur

bland baboons

bleach demons

blizzard bliss

blancs

bone thugs

borax bats

𝐂

cauliflower conquerers

cauliflower pigeons

chrome startup screen

cauliflower crunchers

casper crickets

condensation calamities

chewed spearmint gum

coleslaw

columbus cadets

cave dwellers

chalk children

chalk chihuahuas

chalk chimps

ceiling fan

cloudy with a chance of colonization

children of the chalk

clear people

cultureless neanderthals

cum stain

cum skinned goblins

cigarette buds

cocaine monkey

coconut cocoos

coconut shavings

cornstarch crusaders

cotton ball flies

cotton swabs

cumstaint colonizers

colonizer

colombochauns

colourless cockroaches

corn starch

cousin lovers

cream cheese

cream confederate

crystal methamphetamine powdered iguanas

christopher columbus stans

casper the ghost

cracker barrel

cement walls

cloud chompers

cheese curds

clorox conquerors

cherry gatorade

crest extreme whitening toothpaste

culture vultures

cornstarch snakes

chlorine community

𝐃

dandruff clumps

discord light mode

death eaters

discharge doritos

discharge snow drop

discharge donkeys

discharge stains

discharge cosplay

discharge doggies

discharge gremlins

dandruff flakes

dove soap

default paint

deodorant stain

dog daters

dog kissers

dry chicken munchers

dry wall

dust mites

dutch dummies

𝐄

enemy of the sun

elmers glue

elbow ash

eggplant without the skin

eqinsu ocha

expired cheese

expired milk

𝐅

feta cheese folks

flavourless oatmeal

flavourless twinkies

flashback mary

flour fleas

flour power

frost feind

frosted opossums

foam cups

funky dime smelling bitch

𝐆

greek yogurt

garlic goblin

ghost thugs

gora (horse in Hindu)

grandpa’s pubes

𝐇

hueless crayons

hueless hooligans

high spf sun factor 50/50

𝐈

ice chimp

ice mice

iron golems

infecting wipes

iphone chargers

iphone light mode

ivory individuals

ice scorpions

inkless markers

𝐉

jeff the killers

jizzy delinquents

jar of mayo

jackie crackies

jelly babies with too much powder

𝐊

keeho’s white wall

ku klux karen

ku klux kleenex

kleenex klumps

𝐋

la llorona

lice attractors

lice breeders

lice factories

light mayonnaise

light mode

livestock

low fat milks

𝐌

marshmallow fellows

maggots

marshmallow minions

milk crickets

milk man

milk maggots

milk muncher

modge podge

minecraft ghast

milk beetle

mozzarella cheese

mayo packets

mayo monkeys

mayo skunk

mayosapiens

mcdonald’s cup lid

mayonnaise murderers

melaninly challenged

mosquito larvae

𝐍

no seasoning seagulls

no purpose flour

nail clippings

naked rambutan

napkin american

𝐎

oyinbo

ode oshi

omo ale

ori buruku

oniranu

onisekuse

ode buruku

ode

obun

oloshi

olodo

𝐏

palm coloured ones

paperback

paper people

people of colonial complexion

people of no colour

pillsbury dough boys

pillsbury pillager

pigment challenged beast

pink africans

powdered donuts

popcorn ceiling

powder rangers

powdered crickets

powdered roaches

porcelain possums

poorly powdered doughnuts

printer paper

plain toast

polar bears

privileged primates

pwc(people without color)

peeled chicken nuggets

𝐐

q-tips

quails without color

𝐑

rabies foam

ranch guzzlers

ranch opossum

ranch raccoons

ranch rats

ranch roach

rice rats

rice rascals

𝐒

salt rocks

saltine cracka

salt shaker

salty scallywags

saltine

sand crabs

seasonably challenged people

sentient snowmen

sheepskin

silentos silencers

snow apes

snow bunnies

seasonedn’t

snicker lickers

snow opossum

snow rat

snow roach

snow toads

snow worm

sour cream gorillas

sour cream n onion

sour cream snakes

sour patch pilgrims

styrofoam balls

snow tribe

stanky ashes

silverfish mutations

styrofoam sickness

sundown sisters

sun poisoned serpents

𝐓

table salt tammies

teabag trespassers

thin lipped chalk child

tighty whitey

toilet paper travellers

toilet seat

teabag trespassers

translucent powder

translucent troglodyte

translucent tyrants

𝐔

useless crayon

uncoloured orangutan

uncoloured skittles

untitled document

undeveloped sperm

unedited google docs

unseasoned chicken

unused pad

unwhipped cream

𝐕

vanilla pudding cups

vanilla cricket

vanilla gorillas

vanilla vultures

vanilla villagers

vanilla wafers

volcano ash

𝐖

walking recessive genes

wiggerely wiggers

whipped cream armadillos

white board

white mutation

white neanderthals

white-out monkeys

white pus

wet dogs

walking dandruff

white trash

wannabe pocs

white tongue

white walker

wonder bread

𝐗

xanax blocks

xenophobic xylophones

𝐘

y'allternatives / y'allts

yogurts yodellers

yeast yeti

yeast yodellers

𝐙

zebra lacking stripes

zit insides

[spys-small-hands]

So I'm currently in love with the Bird Companion cosmetics. Just look at these boys!! They're so happy to have a little friend :D

Also, looking at the list on the TF2 Wiki, Solly has two eagle companion cosmetics (Compatriot and Private Maggot Muncher) and Pyro has two birds entirely (Carrion Carrier and Fiery Phoenix), which I think is very interesting?? In Solly's case they're both community cosmetics so I guess people went "yknow what he can have two, as a treat", and in Pyro's case they went "yknow maybe having just a skeletal bird isn't enough they can have a full bird too".

[teleported-bread]

16?🐾

16. Favorite merc pet

Either Private Maggot Muncher because he was the first cosmetic I ever got, or Ein because a friend gave me him for my birthday a few months back.

[weirdmarioenemies]

Name: Kuribo’s Goomba

Debut: Super Mario Bros. 3

ALLLLLLLLLLRIGHT MAGGOTS, LISTEN UP! TODAY WE’RE HEADIN’ TO BOOT CAMP!

To talk about the big boot that Goombas like to wear, that is! In one specific level of Super Mario Bros. 3, you encounter a strange power-up never seen anywhere else... the Goomba’s Shoe! Inside the Goomba’s Shoe is a variation of Goomba only named by the Nintendo Power guide as “Kuribo’s Goomba.” Now, for those of you that know the Japanese names of some common enemies, you’d realize that more-or-less means “Goomba’s Goomba,” which is kind of a silly name! But hey! We’re all for silliness here!

The Kuribo’s Goomba is given all sorts of weird powers with their shoe, including the ability to bounce really high, jump over spikes, and slam down on Mario wherever they feel! With this, you may wonder why more Goombas don’t wear the Goomba Shoe?

Well, because if they’re not careful, Mario can take the shoe and get all the same powers! With the ability to now hop over large Muncher pits, bounce off the backs of Spinies, and jump much higher than he already could, the truth of the Goomba Shoe is that with great power comes great responsibility. And the Goombas? Well, they just aren’t very responsible! Fortunately, Bowser, thinking a little ahead, restricted the Goomba Shoe to one level completely, and as soon as that level is done, you lose the shoe.

And that was all there was with the Goomba Shoe for many, many years.

It had a brief appearance in the hilariously named Adventures of Super Mario Bros. 3, where it was even more incorrectly named “Karoobi’s Shoe,” but there’s not really much to say aside from that, aside from how silly it is.

By Super Mario 3D World, however, even though the shoe didn’t return itself, we did get a clear reference to it, where in a few levels, Goombas can be seen sliding around in giant ice skates, that you can steal and wear on your own! The skates even let you slide over spikes, but they are a little harder to control than the shoes, so be careful!

And by Super Mario Maker... we finally got the return of the Goomba Shoe in its original form, plus a sweet new stiletto variant! Check it out!

Lookin’ good for the date tonight, Kuribo’s Goomba! I hope you and your girlfriend have a lovely night out! The stiletto variant has just about no differences from the normal variant, aside from a stronger ground pound when you make it large, and a silly feminine laugh when you attach wings! But it isn’t about the differences... it’s about the style!

But more importantly, it’s about the ability to use the Goomba Shoe in any level we wish from here on out! For a long, long time, the Goomba Shoe has been missing completely... but now... there are near-infinite possibilities for the Goomba Shoe... and if that’s not beautiful, I don’t know what is!

[redwiddershins]

[Image Description: The RED Soldier is standing outside of the BLU Base at 2Fort. He’s holding a shovel in his right hand while holding a Liberty Launcher with his other hand. Private Maggot Muncher, a Bald Eagle, perches on his shoulder. End image description.]

I only meant to do a quick drawing of my current Soldier loadout (sans the Reserve Shooter), but it became this. I had fun experimenting with new lighting techniques and such!

[theseaeaglelives]

Round 12

THE SEA EAGLE

MAKING RUGBY LEAGUE GREAT AGAIN!!!

Taking a mid-season holiday for the past month, the Sea Eagle did his utmost to self-isolate, and avoid anyone with a Victorian number plate and/or persons who had come within a bull’s roar of the Crossroads Hotel, the suburbs of Casula, Liverpool, Warwick Farm or South Western Sydney in general, and of course the Holy Duck restaurant and Thai Rock at Wetherill Park. That said, it’s fair to say that even in the pre-COVID era (or any other era for that matter), the Sea Eagle would in all likelihood have avoided most of these destinations on the basis of pure common sense.

A bit like the happenings in Victoria the past month has not been kind to Manly with two wins since the demise of Tommy Turbo and a brief summary of those games follows:

Round 7

Manly Sea Eagles             22

Defeated By

Cronulla Sharks                40

Following on from the stirring victory against the Raiders, Manly was expected to make easy meat of their perennial whipping boys (i.e. The Sharks). Unfortunately, neither team read the script and the Manly defence also decided to take a mid-season holiday allowing the Sharks to run roughshod in this game.

The Sharks ran in 7 tries and only a late flourish (3 tries in the last 15 minutes) saved Manly from even further embarrassment.

As far as the Sea Eagle is concerned there was nothing good to come out of this game, apart from the fact that he did not have to watch it, so the less said the better.

Round 8

Manly Sea Eagles            12

Defeated by

Newcastle Knights          14

Another game that the Sea Eagle was unable to watch, however the score would indicate a much better effort by Manly. That said, Rugby League 101 is a difficult concept to overcome and despite the closeness of the result, the outcome still sees Manly failing to get the chocolates and the all-important 2 competition points.

It has been reported (a bit like in Round 4) that Manly did not get the rub of the green in terms of refereeing decisions in this game culminating in the last minute send off, of Manly firebrand Adin Fonua-Blake for allegedly calling the referee “a f#$king retard” following a contentious and controversial decision.

Fonua-Blake was duly (and rightfully) suspended for 2 weeks, plus a $20k fine (suspended) for this outburst and forced to make an apology to all and sundry, including the toothless tiger also known as the Australian Human Rights Commission for his derogatory attitude and use of the term “retard”.

No doubt this was because the term “retard” is seen as offending those members of society with impaired intellect. Strangely, the fact this outburst was directed at a referee and questioned said referees ability/integrity was barely an issue.

Without condoning the actions of Mr Fonua-Blake, who is quickly building up the CV of an A grade goose, and is an individual who himself may possibly be of quite an impaired intellect, the Sea Eagle is somewhat bemused that Manly did not contest the charges and the suspension.

On the face of it, the use of the word “retard” could well be construed as being derogatory to those members of society of less fortunate and impaired intellect. Having said that, the Oxford Dictionary defines “retard” to mean “to make the development or progress of something slower”. Could it be that young Adin was merely pointing out to the referee his displeasure at the ref’s failure to stamp down on slow play and/or delaying tactics by the Knights??

The suspension of Fonua-Blake for his outburst has prompted the Sea Eagle to ponder on what is now deemed to be an acceptable way to dish out criticism of referees and/or to avoid offence to the usual suspects.

To start with, it would appear that the use of the pro-noun “f#@king” is acceptable given that there was little or no offence taken by this word in this instance.

Obviously as has been proven here, the word “retard” is not acceptable, as is anything that is sexist (e.g. woman, girlie, pussy etc), racist (e.g. black, coon, gook etc.) or that could cause offence to the LBGTQ community (e.g. faggot, poofter, pillow biter, poo puncher, traveller of the chocolate superhighway, carpet muncher etc.). As it should be. There is no place or need to denounce, denigrate, humiliate, slur, or belittle anyone. Even if it is true and even if, on any reading of the objective facts, the said comment could only be taken as a correct statement of the bleeding obvious. Readings of the Sea Eagle over many years will stand testimony to that .

In AFL circles the use of the word “maggot” has been universally adopted, so “f#@king maggot” may be a goer. As would be “f#@king tool”, “f#@king knob” and perhaps also “f#@king f@#kwit”. The use of the word “f(8kng c87nt” should however be avoided. The list of acceptable options is endless and players (and fans) now just need to be more creative than has been the case in bygone eras.

Round 9

Manly Sea Eagles            4

Defeated by

St-George Dragons          34

The Manly defence mid-season holiday continued in this game and without Tommy Turbo/Dylan Walker there was also nothing to offer in attack. The Dragons, who were going legless at the time ran roughshod over Manly and as a result Manly’s season was then appearing to be in a free-fall, not dissimilar to the Victorian government’s handling of the COVID debacle.

As was the case in Round 7, as far as the Sea Eagle is concerned there was nothing good to come out of this game, apart from the fact that he did not have to watch it, so the less said the better.

Round 10

Manly Sea Eagles            22

Defeated

Parramatta Eels               18

Based on the past 3 weeks, Manly were expected to be lapped by the high-flying and competition leading Eels.

Sent out at the juicy odds of $4.50, Manly was back at fortress Brookvale, and dished out an old-fashioned ambush on their bitter rivals and in the blink of an eye ran out to a 16-0 lead in as many minutes.

Cherry Baby (who had a shocker the previous week) was back to his best and was front and centre, leading from the front and instrumental in Manly’s improved performance.

Despite a late comeback by the Eels, Manly ran out deserved winners to get their season back on track and keep them within striking distance from the top 8. That said, without Tommy Turbo (and to a lesser extent Dylan Walker), Manly do appear to continue to struggle and it is only their pride and tradition, and a great coach in Des Hasler, who seems to work miracles with very little,  that will keep them in contention until the great man Tommy Turbo (and Dylan Walker) return from injury.

Round 11

Manly Sea Eagles            24

Defeated

North Queensland Cowboys       12

Let’s face it, a trip to Townville even at the best of times is never a pleasant experience. Commonly referred to as Shitsville in the popular Shit Towns of Australia Facebook Page, Townsville is a regular chart topper in the rankings of Australia’s crappiest places to visit. A trip to Townsville is made even worse when confronted by an equally desperate North QLD Cowboys outfit  and played at a traditional graveyard for many previous Manly campaigns.

Thankfully however, Manly carried some of their good form from the previous week’s outing against the Eels and started this game where they left off.

After dominating the early skirmishes, Manly opened the scoring after 7 minutes via a barnstorming and bullocking effort from Curtis “the Carnivore” Sironen (more on that later). 

After having to withstand some pressure of their own with some at times desperate defence, Manly were able to extend their lead 10 minutes of the break when new hooker Danny Levi barged over from dummy half. Levi has been a shrewd acquisition for Manly and has done a fine job filling in for the mandatorily stood down, Manase Fainu, who in the Sea Eagle’s opinion will be lucky to avoid incarceration for his alleged off-season stabbing incident.

Unfortunately, Manly was unable to maintain their dominance with the Cowboys hitting back on the stroke of half time when winger Kyle Felt lept high to take a bomb over the permanently grounded Horhay Taufua. Defusing the high ball has never been one of young Horhay’s hallmarks and again he was found wanting in this instance. Manly 12-6.

After withstanding some early second half pressure, tries to Cherry Baby and Cade Cust sealed the win for Manly. The Sea Eagle (as did Des Hasler post-match) would like to single out Cade Cust for special mention. Young Cust is improving each week and looks a likely prospect reminding the Sea Eagle of a young Keiran Foran. Let’s hope for young Cade’s sake that he does not follow the example set by Foran (i.e. leaving the nest, chasing greener pastures elsewhere and ending up on the rugby league scrap heap at one time allegedly residing in a less than ideal housing arrangement).

When Dylan Walker returns it will be interesting to see whether he finds himself back out in the centre position , putting a bit of pressure on Brad Parker to retain his spot. That said, young Parker might be quite a useful bench player given his robust frame and liking for the heavy stuff, which could easily see him cover forward and/or backline replacements as required.

EAT RED MEAT

It has been reported (SMH 25/7/20) that since going on to what has been called a Carnivore (i.e. meat only) diet this year, young Curtis Sironen has been able to transform himself from an average journeyman to an established and worthy first grader. Based on his recent performances it’s hard to argue, however the Sea Eagle must attribute some of his improvement to the fact that he is now being mentored by master Coach Des Hasler as opposed to the procession of mediocre Coaches he has had to endure in the past.

It also goes to prove, yet again, some things the Sea Eagle has found quite repellent . And that is the latest trend of so called veganism. We need to get one thing straight here . Carnivores are A grade predators and top the food chain. And for good reason . If you play Rugby League or think like a Rugby League person then you better eat red meat and follow the Curtis Sironen example. It is your choice whether you prefer to eat it raw, rare or medium rare . If you want to follow netball , soccer (men or women's ) or AFL (men or womens) then by all means become a vegetable only eating Nancy Boy.

The Sea Eagle, based on the findings of Mr Sironen, suggests red meat become a predominant part of the diet (and if religious reasons preclude eating beef, ensure that lamb , Goat , kangaroo , snake or crocodile, or venison is the appropriate substitution). If you are capable of engaging in the Bear Grills type lost art of catch and kill your own in this space, all the better.

  The Demise of the Dogs (and the return of Trent Barrett)

It is not with any pleasure that the Sea Eagle accounts the demise of this once proud club. The past decade has been nothing short of shambolic, from sex scandals (e.g. Coffs Harbour, Port Macquarie etc), mad Monday debacles, horrendous recruiting (e.g. Foran, Hoppoate, Hasler etc), to now finding itself odds-on to get the spoon in 2020 and having recently sacked club stalwart and legend Dean Pay.

Can it get worse for the Dogs and their long-suffering fans? In short YES.

It has widely been reported in many media outlets that none other than Trent Barrett has been signed to a 3-year deal to take on the head job relacing Dean Pay.

What is there left to say about Trent Barrett, that has not already been said. His time at Manly was nothing short of a debacle, with the only good thing to be said about this DFI infected, ex-Dragon/Shark, non-premiership winner, was that he kept the gym clean and has a good supply of his own gym/office furniture.

https://t.co/2A3P9koeuD?ssr=true

The decision by the Dogs to give Barrett the head job beggars belief. Those in charge of this decision at the very least should have sought explanation and clarification of the following questions and issues, during the interview and appointment process. Namely; “Trent:

Have you won a premiership as a player?

Have you won a premiership as a coach?

Have you ever been coached at club level by a premiership winner?

As a player were you ever coached by DFI patient zero, Brian Smith?

Is it possible that as a consequence of question 3, that you are infected with DFI which is still transmittable to players that you coach?

As a player, were you ever publicly slapped by your coach (who was also a DFI infected, ex-Dragon, non-premiership winner?)

Were you sacked from your previous head coaching role?

Has any team since your sacking, under a new coach improved?

Do you hate Manly and all they represent (ie success and a failure to tolerate mediocrity)?

Do you agree that on the whole, when someone leaves Manly they rarely if ever, go any better and sometimes end up on the slide to oblivion?”

Finally, do you still have any decent office/gym furniture?

The Sea Eagle takes little joy or pleasure from this apparent demise of the Canterbury Bankstown Bulldogs . Whilst it is fair to say the Sea Eagle has never loved this club , the Sea Eagle has generally speaking had nothing but the most respect for how about they went about the business of Rugby League. Let's face it, there was a time when if you played the Bulldogs, you knew you were in for a hard afternoon/evening’s work . Until now . The appointment of Trent Barret as coach, who is so un-Bulldog, will and should end in tears.

COVID 19 MELBOURNE

With the recent debacle that is the Victorian government handling of Covid 19 quarantine matters, one might have hoped the effective isolation of Victoria from the rest of Australia via mandatory border closures, would have seen the Melbourne Storm and their filthy wrestling techniques also marooned in that COVID-19 ridden hellhole. Regrettably, the Storm managed to escape to sunny Queensland and are now functioning as though nothing had happened. More is the pity.

Frankly, the Sea Eagle cannot understand how this occured given Queensland has quite correctly banned anyone who comes from the Liverpool and general South Western Sydney post codes from entering their State (and seem to be able to ban residents from nominated NSW postcodes virtually at will and on a daily basis).

When they went to Albury earlier in the year, that town rightly wanted them out pronto.

Surely banning the Storm would have been an easy and straightforward/ common sense decision to make given where they came from (ie Melbourne). This must now be seen for what it is, a missed opportunity to remove the Storm from the Rugby League landscape once and for all. All fair minded followers of Rugby League can place the blame for this one squarely at the feet of the Queensland government.

 THE SEA EAGLE

[babys-first-campaign]

Courtesy of /u/ThoughtEater1:

The Big List of Racial Slurs

Anyone who isn't water breathing:

Landwalker 

Drowner 

Landdweller 

Mouth-breather

Dwarves:

Beard-goblin 

Flea-bearded alestain 

Stunty 

Pump Sucker

Stone shitter 

half-sized alcoholic 

Maggots (according to legend!) 

rock eater 

Stone Domes 

Gutter Rats 

Angry Footstool 

Rockhead 

Hairy Halfling 

Tunnel Rat

Pubic Face 

Cave Hippo 

Oremonger 

Bushies 

Gut Draggers 

Knoties 

Lumberfoot 

Half-Man 

Gnomes 

Spuds (Both are lumpy and come from the ground) 

stunt  

gold digger  

dirt-licker  

teapot  

hammer midget  

copper polisher  

squash (look like squashed humans)  

rock bitter  

stone humper  

hill/mountain/dirt fairy  

keg belly  

pyrite-muncher  

giant snot 

Hairy Brewery

Elves:

Leaf lickers 

Butterboys

Dandelion Eater 

Pointy ears 

Knife-ears 

Sharp ears 

Chinfolk 

Beardless 

Pole-proportioned dendrophile 

Fairy Folk 

Drow (except to actual drow) 

Pointy 

Wood-Heads 

Fancy Lad

Tree-thumpers 

Dagger Head 

Rabbit 

Keeb 

Leafblower 

arrogant stuck up tree fondling hippies 

tree hugger 

pixie  

bark sniffer  

left handed casters   

waste of immorality  

fairy wannabes  

tinkerbell  

wedgie (they're uptight)  

wingless fairy 

light weights  

mushroom dancers  

faithless woodland sprite 

dew drinker 

fey mongrels 

discount dryad 

daisy sniffer 

weed eater 

bird boned 

oozebait (especially elf children)  

tree f*cker

Drow

murker 

Underscum 

Filth-Skin 

Chimney Sweep 

Cavemen 

Ash-Face

tall dwarfs  

dirt elves  

moss licker  

Spider Kisser 

dwarven imposter

Anyone who isn't a drow:

Iblith (meaning excrement)

Half-Elves

By elves:

Mongrels 

Bastards 

Half Breed 

Mudbloods 

Half Bad 

Mayfly Babies

By Humans:

Fling Kids 

Traitor Babies 

Half Good 

Mutts 

Mules 

Not Enough 

Halfways

Halflings

Hairy doorstop 

Hill goblin 

Hairless Dwarf 

Leatherfoot 

Children 

Dwarfling 

Gnome 

Shaved Dwarf 

Sneakies 

Succling 

Ankle Biter 

Swine 

Half men 

Dire-Midget 

Bilbo 

Runt 

Arm rest 

sticky fingers  

small fry  

hobbit  

shin licker  

all-you-can-eat  

fairy giant

Humans

Soft one (from lizardfolk) 

Round ears 

Pink Thing 

Mayfly 

Pinks 

Dust 

Spoon-Ears 

Normie 

Short-life 

pink-skin  

Joe Bloggs 

generic protag #435 (if a PC) 

Full-lings 

Smoothskin 

Succling 

Swine 

Quisling (a human who spends a lot of time around a dragonborn) 

Dire Halfling 

Lumberfoot 

Pig Skin 

Shortlived 

Monkeys 

Doubling (by Halflings) 

World-blight (by elves) 

Tree-killers (by elves) 

Monkey 

graceless elf 

rabbit spawn (from the elf point of view because of how fast they seem to breed to them) 

milkskins (orcs on humans) 

whore-race (they're the reason for half breeds) 

Cattle 

Morties 

roundteeth

Dragonborn

Lizard 

Fly eater 

Fake-drakes 

Tall Kobold 

Iguana Wannabe

Snakeskin 

Wyrm Wannabe 

Scalie 

Boot 

Scalebacks 

Scales 

Lizard Brain 

Walking Purse 

Skinks 

Man-Eater 

Lizardfolk 

Forked-Tongues 

dragon refuse 

newt  

Gecko 

wyrm reject 

overgrown iguana

For anyone who isn't a dragonborn:

maunthreki

Gnomes

Quarterling 

KneeLicker 

Mini-elf 

Halfling 

Mushroom sucker 

Ankle Biter 

Fat Fairy 

Sniffers 

Tinkertots 

Lawn ornaments 

Bug-Eyed Stumps 

Shaved Hobgoblin 

Glamer-slingers 

Dwarflings 

Trickster 

discount dwarf  

cone head  

lawn darts

Half-orcs/orcs

Swampskin 

Tusk-Face 

Greenskins 

Slimeskin 

Dorc 

Forc 

Necro-Breath 

Pig-Face 

Tuskers 

Grunt 

Scumbreed 

Halfbreed 

Lumberfoot 

The green beast (referring collectively) 

Savages 

green ape  

broccoli head  

ogre droppings

Tieflings

Devil spawn 

Sideshow

Devil bastard 

Hellspawn 

Brighteyes 

Gargoyles 

Bullheads 

Half-Hells 

Pox 

Demon Child 

Handle Heads 

Clip-Clops 

Goat Face 

Unloveables (from Demons) 

Freak 

Failbirth 

Filth 

Unbirth 

Hell-touched 

Tainted Ones 

Tall Imps

Kenku

crow  

raven  

parrot (in tropical/port cities) 

Flightless 

Hollowbones 

Noisemakers 

Mockingbirds 

Caw-Caws 

Peckers 

Copycats 

Jabbers

Aasimar:

God's Pet 

Goody Two Shoes 

Wingless Earthbound bastard Half breed 

Birdy 

Chickenbrain 

Chicken 

Angel Face

Aarakocra

crow  

raven  

parrot (in tropical/port cities) 

Hollowbones 

Bird-Man 

Pigeon 

Caw-Caws

Kobolds

Scaly Gnomes

Little Lizardfolk 

Yippers

Gnoll

hunger slave 

mutt 

cur  

Dog 

Carrion-eaters

Warforged

Rusties 

clinking clanking clattering collection of caliginous junk 

Dumbells 

Hunk of Junk 

Lemon 

Golems 

Walking talking tools 

Dummies (as in training/target dummy) 

Scarecrows 

Dolls 

Marionettes / Puppets 

Made-to-Orders 

Fakes / Facsimiles 

Walking Casket 

rust bucket  

gear head  

scrap heap  

golem (they're living constructs)  

robot

Genasi

Fire

Cold Heart 

Matchstick 

Hazard 

Sunburn

Earth

Gravel bed 

Sedimentary 

Slabs

Air

Leaf Blower 

Spark Plug 

Unfavorable Fart (From Orcs. Orcs aren't great at throwing shade) 

Windbags

Water

Algae Infested 

Salty 

Soakhead

Goblins

Greenskin 

Gobber 

Slimeskin 

Trash Gnome 

Orcslave 

Toothpick-Nose

Tabaxi

Fleabag 

Hairball 

Cat 

Worm farm

Triton

fish f*cker 

Dolphin born 

Wet blanket 

Coral Eater

Firbolg

Giant Half-Breed

Overgrown Dwarf

Half-Baked Goliath

Goliath

Mini-Giant

Tribal Boy

Stoneskin

Centuars

Clippity-Clops 

Horse Bastards 

Half-Horses

Giants

Tumbletower ( tall like a tower, but more easy to knock down)

Nesthair (birds tend to nest in high places)

Indirect Racial Slurs:

*a dagger "a Gnome Greatsword"

*a bag of leftovers from a restaurant "an Orc-y Bag"

*the act of going barefoot "wearing Halfling Shoes" with signs in stores specifically forbidding halfling shoes

*happy endings at a massage parlor "Human Style"

*public drunkenness "going Dwarven"

*vegetables "Elf food"

*the bastard children of non-human races "Half-man"

*unshaven men "dwarf babies"

*whiskey "dwarf milk"

*barrels of whiskey "dwarven wetnurse"

*bad breath "dragonborn singing"

*pickpocketing "halfing handshake"

*picking a lock "banging a halfling's sister"

*stealing a horse "taking a half-orc bride"

*laying a dwarf or gnome "boulder rolling"

[hellish-punk-rocker]

ZOMBIE/APOCALYPSE STARTER SENTENCES

(( to celebrate the release of Zombies Chronicles for Black Ops III, I thought I’d try my hand at some sentence starters. Enjoy. Yeah the scenario’s been done before but shut up >:( ))

PRE-APOCALYPSE/SAFEZONE

“It’s not much, but it’ll keep them out.”

“Oh God… not …“ (implying said location has been overrun or has ceased all communication)

“Did you see the news…?”

“We need to get out of here! Now!”

“Finally… maybe now I can get a full night’s sleep.”

“We’re running out of food…”

“Do you think things will go back to normal?” (Bonus: you think we be alive to see it)

“We’ll get through this! I know we will!”

“This food tastes like (adjective), but I guess it’ll have to do.”

UNDER ATTACK!STARTERS

“Shit! They’re here!”

“Oh god oh god oh god…” (If muse is weak or scared)

“We can’t let them get in! Help me hold this door!”

“Fuck! I’m out of ammo!” (Or: My (weapon) broke!)

“Take this, you (insult)”

BITTEN!STARTERS

“Shit… one of them got me…”

“Please don’t kill me! Please!”

“Kill me before I try and hurt you!”

“I’m going to be one of them whether I live or die… just put me out of my misery before I hurt you…”

“Dammit! We have to cut it off!”

“Ah, fuck! One of them got my (body part)!”

SPECIAL NAZI ZOMBIES STARTERS!

“Die you undead flesh addicts/bone monkeys/maggot munchers/nasty squacks!”

“Oh look! No power. How suspicious… or OBVIOUS!”

“I don’t know who Jim Bowie was, but I bet he was LONG, and BIG, and SHARP!”

“You are dead now! But you were dead before! Ah fuck you.”

“I’m so happy I could do the (dance). (begins singing).”

“You touch me, I KILL YOU! Sounds like fair trade.”

“There are enough zombies for everyone, I just happen to be killing them all!”

“I merely slipped in all the blood I spilled.”

“What? That stripper must have stolen my money!”

“This is a… most unnatural weapon.”

“Oh, you wish to die face to face then? So be it!”

(( I’ll write more later. Have fun with these for now! ))

[dapayeora]

So I finally collected myself (because I got fucking butthurt about that horrible large Sex Bomb tattoo on Scout and was trying to refuse to remember it) and went through the official TF2 comics again and man it took 4 good hours cause they are beautiful and I had to savor every single panel and thank you god Valve decided to made them it’s a beautiful miracle. I have way more stuff I wish to talk about the comics but my English is limited & it’ll be so messy if I try to list all those out.

What I originally wanted to say is that Private Maggot Muncher and Compatriot are basically the same but solly deserves them so let him have as many eagles as he wants.

[rincongamers]

Team Fortress 2 Update Released

An update to Team Fortress 2 has been released. The update will be applied automatically when you restart Team Fortress 2. The major changes include: Matchmaking Changes

The initial load time into a match no longer counts against a player's abandon timer

Changed the timeout before a missing player is marked as having abandoned a competitive match to be three minutes from the first time a player disconnects from the server, rather than from the moment the match is formed

Queue times should now be significantly faster when dealing with large numbers of placement and recently-placed players in queue

Moved the Competitive MMR change notification so it no longer overlaps your rank

Fixed continuing to receive the prompt to rejoin a match after you have been dropped from said match

Fixed a case where players would receive a rank change in matches that dissolved due to abandon

General

Added a stomp animation to Pyro that plays when coming down after blasting off from the Thermal Thruster

Added HLPugs.tf tournament medals

Added Gette it Onne! tournament medals

Added TFCL tournament medals

Added Copenhagen Games tournament medals

Fixed Medics having an accelerated Ubercharge build-rate when healing full-health Snipers who are using The Razorback

Fixed being able to capture control points during setup time

Fixed the Golden Wrench not having an offset when using minimized viewmodels

Fixed the Private Maggot Muncher hiding the Soldier's hat when equipped

Fixed the Medic's auto-call feature not including enemy Spies disguised as the Medic's team

Fixed The Lugermorph not displaying when inspected in the backpack

Fixed unusual effects on the Brass Bucket rendering in the wrong spot

Fixed Mann vs. Machine late-join failing for parties of two or more

Fixed the Short Circuit orb not changing particle color after being deflected

Fixed the Short Circuit orb not being able to destroy rockets/grenades during the first 0.25 seconds of their lifetime

Updated models and materials for the Private Maggot Muncher

Updated the localization files