#maggie is a good mom
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it's not sinking in that today might be the last day in my house and town for many months to come
#like how do i even feel#on one hand im excited because like now that i finally agreed to dads stupid whims he technically will have to give in to things#ive been wanting since FOREVER like going to the gym#plus it's impossible to eat junk food when he's there he won't even let me kacchi maggi because maida hai bimar ho jayegi#and aadhe se zyada din toh pyaaz ye sab nahi kha sakte so it rules out any outside food#which is so good because like i just found out im pre diabetic lol#like borderline sugar like ab kuch nahi kiya toh seedha type 2 diabetes#so i need to eat healthy or ill literally die#i mean eventually but whatever being diagnosed with this in my 20s would kill me#also simply the fear of living with him is so much that i HAVE to study#and i want to now it's high time#but yeah want doesn't really work for me#i read a quote somewhere that 'goals' don't mean anything because winners and losers have the same goals#and i was like WOAH. like the person who gets an all india rank had the same goal as me: to pass the exam with good marks#but they succeeded and i didn't so it's isn't our goals that differentiate us#which ik is obvious but like still idk put things in perspective#anyway yeah that way my life MIGHT be fixed#but there's also living ALONE with my sociopathic FATHER who has more mood swings than me on pms#and being cut off frm the rest of civilisation and yk developed roads and buildings and ice cream shops#i guess it is mostly food ig :( which is good like the most junk food i can eat there is a burger from a nearby stall and that's pretty#much it they literally do not even have havmor or anything in walking distance forget scoop wali ice cream#but i like my bed and i like my ceiling with the stars and i like looking out of my window and knowing that the first ever crush of my life#lives right next to me and i like knowing that ill meet my bestfriend atleast once a month#i don't really love my mom or my brother tbh but idk maybe ill miss them it's weird ive never lived without them#i don't know i really hope that this is like a boot camp kota types experience rather than so much isolation that i sink deep into#depression. but then ive hit pretty shocking lows this year so hopefully i can handle it#my sister did say that when she lived alone with him for a month it was quite peaceful and okay because he usually gets more angry when mom#is around warna mostly he's fine#i don't know i don't know bhagwan ji please ab aur mushkil mat banana life bohot jhatke de chuke ho already ab pls#mujhe apni galtiyo ko sudharne ka mauka dena 🙏
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Anne Hathaway is just my all time perfect fancast for Maggie Tozier:
This just screams Richie's mom to me. Especially as a teenage Maggie.
#maggie tozier#richie tozier#wentworth tozier#tozier family#good mom maggie tozier#it#stephen king#the losers club
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“Rich? Is that you, sweetheart?” Maggie calls from kitchen.
“What would you have done if it wasn’t?” Richie asks her with a smirk when she comes into the foyer, drying her hands off with a dish towel.
Unfortunately for Richie, she doesn’t take the bait. “I thought you were going over to Eddie’s after school.”
Richie pouts before he can stop himself. “He’s sick.”
Maggie frowns. “Actually sick, or sick?” she asks, complete with air quotes on the second ‘sick’ that make Richie actually chuckle a little.
“Actually sick. Believe it or not,” he answers. “Big Bill went to pick him up this morning and said he looked like death warmed over.”
Maggie sighs, then turns on her heel and shuffles back into the kitchen. “I have some chicken noodle soup in the freezer, I’ll just give it a thaw and you can go bring it over to him.”
Richie makes a face and follows her. “Dude, what? I don’t wanna get his nasty ass germs!”
“Language,” she says simply, pulling an old take-out container filled with frozen soup out of the freezer. “And please, Richard. Like you weren’t planning on sneaking out tonight to bring him a care package already. At least this will have actual nutrition.”
Richie tries to will down his blush, but his mom shoots him a knowing smile and he knows when he’s been beat.
“Whatever,” he grumbles, striding towards the stairs as his mom chuckles. “Just call me when it’s ready.”
#reddie#car’s fanfiction#richie tozier#eddie kaspbrak#maggie tozier#I’m sick 🥲 dang kid keeps bringing me daycare plague so enjoy this mom and sick themed little ficlet lol#good parents Maggie and Went
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negan and maggie’s relationship is so. so fuckign fascinating to me. like. like…imagine teaming up with someone (repeatedly) who killed the love of your life and was also either directly or indirectly responsible for the death of your friends. imagine wanting nothing more than wanting to kill this person and feeling bitter and angry because your friends refuse to kill this person. you are so anguished over it that you leave with your son (whose father was murdered by this person), and then you come back, and all your friends seem to begrudgingly trust (or at least coexist) with this awful person. and this person is now trying to help you. he saves your life multiple times and also saves your son, the last living reminder of your murdered love. this person is asking to become the monster so you don’t have to. this person tells you that you need to come back. this person understands that you would kill him, and he might even let you. he lets you do the closest thing to killing him instead—he lets you turn him in, knife to his throat, and you’re leaving him, and your son won’t talk to you, and you come to the sudden realization that perhaps you need to go back for this monster. what the hell kind of dynamic is this
#caroline talks#dead city#like. yeah. i’m thinking about maggie and negan again#like. they’re sooo frog and the scorpion coded.#like. it’s so. good. but also so complicated#tbh in my head. i think that like . . .#i think negan and maggie will always walk this incredibly fragile line#i think it’ll only end with like. maggie saving negan a la rick grimes#and frankly. glenn rhee.#i keep thinking ‘if glenn were alive. how would he look at negan today.’#bc on the one hand i don’t think he would have ever forgiven negan either#but also i think he would have been a cross between daryl and aaron and gabriel in opinion of negan#kind of like. bitchy. rightfully so. but also like. understanding he could be vaguely useful#but then u hit the wall of ‘well. we’ll never know bc negan killed Glenn’#the other alternative is negan dying for maggie and hershel#which would ALSO hurt. esp bc as awful as negan could be#like . . . i do think he genuinely has it in him to be a better man and i want him to see his son and wife again#the FUNNIEST thing that could happen#would be if ginny and joshua and hershel all became friends#and negan and maggie become funny little play date parents#with like. maggie being begrudgingly nice to joshua and ginny#and glaring at negan…and meanwhile hershel kind of begrudgingly tolerates negan#and has to go ‘mom. mom stop glaring at him. joshua is RIGHT there.’
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💘🍛 I like both of these. What's most important to your oc (of choice but I'm thinking of Maggie), and what their usual dinner looks like <3
Hiiiiiiiii <3
💘 HEART WITH ARROW — what and/or who do(es) your oc consider the most important to them?
Maggie has sooo few people she's close with BUT the people she IS close with she is VERY close with, the three main ones would be her brother, Hawke, her Girl Best Friend (come to your own conclusions on this one, they'll never have an actual discussion about it), Jenna, and one of the ghosts that hangs around her, Opal. Hawke she was always fairly close with as a kid, while he never actually believed her when she would talk about the ghosts and their various shenanigans, he was always one of her strongest and most reliable supporters, and would claim to believe her. She knows now that he never actually believed her (She figured that out as a preteen), but she definitely appreciates the fact he was still always there for her and standing up for her when she'd get talked over by others. When she wakes back up after her murder, finding where he lives is one of her first priorities, because she's basically having like a million crises at once and figures he's the person she trusts must to be able to help her.
Paragraph break because I'm going on longer than anticipated WHOOPS. For Jenna, she's close with her for several reasons. The first part is... honestly just a bit of necessity. Maggie's lost and scared and has no idea what's going on, and Jenna's the first person to approach her and is someone willing to try and help her figure out what's going on, during a situation where anyone else would've just forced her to go to a hospital (Which... to be fair Jenna definitely should've suggested they go to some sort of medical help, given that she was passed out in the middle of a field and wakes up talking about being murdered). Outside of necessity, however, she and Jenna just like... basically instantly latch onto each other. They're frankly both a bit obsessive with each other because they both... really don't have anyone else? Once the plot ends and their lives calm down they'll get some other friends and their dynamic will become more sustainable longterm, but in the moment they've only got each other and GODDAMN do they have each other. Jenna's like 90% of the reason Maggie wants to actually take care of herself, because if she's not doing it, Jenna just does it for her, and she doesn't like feeling like a burden, even if Jenna's doing it willingly and without viewing as such. Their bond is so largely based on their willingness to support each other, so. yknow <3
For Opal, she's known Maggie since she was only a few months old! Ghosts took notice of Maggie's ability to see them LONG before Maggie would be learn this was Not normal, AKA, as a several month old baby, she'd track ghosts with her eyes and try and interact with them like any other person, which alerted the ghosts to the fact she could actually see them. This made her essentially a bit of a celebrity/VERY weird and kinda creepy to the ghosts, so word of the Magic Baby Who Can See Dead People spread, and tons of local ghosts would hang around just to see her themselves. Opal ALSO heard of her, and she just generally loves kids, so she went to go see baby Maggie, only to realize that oh man. This is going to be. a tough life for this kid. So she takes it upon herself to watch over her, and chases away other ghosts who bother her so that Maggie doesn't have to spend her entire life being harassed by ghosts. Their dynamic is a bit weird throughout Maggie's life, as Opal tends to be a bit overbearing, and also tends to talk over the living people Maggie's trying to talk/listen to, making it difficult for her to concentrate, but as frustrating as Maggie finds her to be, they still are very close, Opal's someone Maggie can be actually open with, and someone who is always trying to look out for her and protect her any way she can. Their dynamic gets WAY more strained after Maggie's death but this is already a VERY long ramble and that would involve a LOT more so I'll save that for another day
🍛 CURRY AND RICE — what does your oc's typical dinner look like? do they usually eat dinner?
Bad it looks bad.
Okay the actual answer is more nuanced <3 Prior to her murder, Maggie was still living at home (She was only 17 and had JUST graduated highschool, graduating a year early), so her typical dinner was just... whatever her mom made! Nothing too fancy, just pretty generic dinner items. Maggie's never really had much of an appetite, but also stayed up extremely late every night, so typically it'd be eating like half the normal portion of whatever dinner was -> stay up until 2am -> Get hungry and finish off the other half of dinner -> stay up until [god knows how late]. Her favorite meal is probably stew, though while she is an extremely picky eater, of the foods she's okay with she doesn't tend to have really any standout favorites.
Once she wakes back up after her murder and has to care for herself, her dinner is... crackers. As mentioned, she's an extremely picky eater, but she also has no skill in cooking and is also just deeply depressed, so she can't really give the effort to care about it enough to want to eat properly, so she just. doesn't! However, once Jenna starts hanging around more, specifically hanging around for long enough stretches of time to see Maggie's abysmal self care and eating habits, THEN Maggie's typical dinner stops being "crackers" and starts being whatever Jenna makes her. This is typically things like easier to prepare meals like mac n cheese, but Jenna always adds things to them that aren't included to make them nicer, so it's always more than just "box of kraft mac n cheese", its got some added vegetables and meat added in there to make it better!
Once Maggie actually starts trying to learn how to cook herself, her typical dinner consists of one single bite of whatever she tried and promptly failed to make, and then a plate of Whatever Jenna Made Instead. She's trying her best but oh boy. its not great.
#IM SORRY I WENT ON SO LONG.#also Maggie's favorite meal AFTER the plot is probably a nice salad#low effort + REALLY hard for her to fuck up + tastes good#as for Maggies dynamic with Opal post-murder... its. its something. its bad </3#The start of Maggie's full blown breakdown is literally her snapping and tearing into Opal and essentially blaming her for her murder#This is. bad. Opal has already felt INSANELY guilty all of this time- she would leave Maggie alone at night-#-to try and help with Maggies insomnia by not keeping her up#-so she ABSOLUTELY feels responsible in part for Maggie's murder- that she could've been there and she could've warned Maggie-#-about the intruder. But like. It's not her fault. How could she have known? Maggie knows its not her fault#but she's extremely freaked out at that point and is having an intense breakdown and is lashing out at Opal because she just needs SOMEONE-#-to blame. She's dying and she doesnt know why and she needs to find someone to blame for it#anyways maggie please apologize to your ghost mom. (she does. she also gets to- for the first and only time- physically hold her hand)#(ghosts can physically interact with each other- and Maggies growing wounds are essentially her soul physically splitting-#-so its essentially this bittersweet moment of like. for the first time- shes able to reach out and hold Opals hand.#and its only because shes dying)#BUT THEN SHE DOESNT DIE. VITALLY IMPORTANT#my OCs#maggie
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@beatingheart-bride
"Emily..." Randall began, almost tearfully, but it was June and Wilhelm who spoke up over him-not to agree, not to rush her out the door and warn her not to come back, but instead to ask her to stay.
"Please," Wilhelm began, as June reached out to take the young woman's cold hand, stopping her as he continued, "W-Would you stay, just a little longer, lass? Really, we...we'd like it if you stayed. I-I promise, y-you're not intruding; Junie and I weren't able to sleep anyways..."
"You saved our son's life, and you brought him back home to us," June continued gently, as Randall sat up a little, just as surprised as Emily was at this sudden turn of events, this change in reaction in his parents. "We...we can't thank you enough for that. Please, won't you sit down? I...I think we have a lot to talk about...and a lot to apologize for."
At this, Randall's eyes widened further, as he looked between Emily, his mother, and his father, that surprise turning to a sort of tentative relief, as his mother encouraged Emily to make herself comfortable, while June moved to the kitchen to put on a pot of tea, to perhaps soothe their frazzled nerves. She hoped the young woman (not a monster, she thought to herself, but a young woman) would accept, and hear out what the Pace parents had to say.
#((i'm sorry: an a.i. just isn't nearly as threatening as the soul of a serial killer!))#((the terror of 'child's play' is defidently that andy is so little-he's this adorable little six-year-old who makes your heart melt))#((watching him make his mom breakfast on his own birthday and getting excited about having a good guy of his own))#((and so you don't want anything to happen to him! he's being preyed upon by what he thought was his friend))#((his talking good guy doll-even worse; chucky told andy that he was sent by andy's dead father to play with him))#((which adds a cruel twist to things-andy just wanted a friend; and now he's in danger; and no one believes him))#((not until the end! so having andy be older; be attacked by an a.i. doll who should NOT be that strong like you said))#((and have more allies on his side; it really does take away that fear factor; that level of suspense!))#((and there really is so much love in the main franchise; as opposed to the 2019 reboot))#((which feels more like your standard cash grab! it's almost a family affair))#((considering the actress who played andy's mother in the first film married kevin yagher))#((who designed and built the chucky animatronic; i think alex vincent's little sister played chucky))#((for the scene where he runs behind andy's aunt maggie shortly before she goes pushed out the window))#((and of course brad dourif's daughter fiona is a part of the franchise now; having played nica pierce))#((and even playing a young charles lee ray in flashbacks for the tv show!))#((there really is so much love and care behind it; the kind of love and care you just don't see in the reboot!))#outofhatboxes#beatingheart-bride#V:Dark Shadows
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idk if we can say apex mobile images confirm anything but i KNEW the legends had a holiday potluck. IIIIII knew it . infodump —vvv
#i know what type of shit they’d all bring too. FOR SURE !!#mirage i think obv brings some kind of pork (pork chop. or whatever .#but i also think he’d make a killer pasta salad#and ummm pathfinder duh. leviathan stew. What else. maybe she bakes smt sweet as well#lifeline i think would make tamales & bacalao w octane and they’d bring those#she’d also bake cookies and maybe a little cake#wattson and gibraltar prepare the turkey together (disaster but gibraltar keeps it together)#wattsy also bring latkas and applesauce#fuse was originally making the turkey but he fucked it up bad and set everything on fire so gibbs and watts took over#newcastle gets bangalore to make sticky toffee pudding with him (family recipe that she never liked)#caustic brings mash potatoes. not much but he’s caustic . so (they still taste good)#hound bringing a very well done and decorated rack of some creature meat (it’s definitely delicious though#wraith bakes a pie with wattson a few days before holidays probably#rampart also brings a pie or maybe mathri……….ouuugh mathri…..(wants some)#loba makes creme de papaya and a christmas cake with valkyrie and horizon also helps#seer makes stuffing and catalyst also makes stuffing and they are both really good so they don’t get mad about it#i feel like maggie could make a good nut roast.. if they even let her in the kitchen#vantage and her make a nut roast. why not#and vantage’s mom always prepared yuca around the holidays so she HAS to bring it. or else#pathfinder also decorates for the potluck btw. gibraltar and wattson help also#crypto ash and revenant don’t bring anything . crypto because he doesn’t like to cook and ash and revenant because they suck. ❤️#sorry i needed to share my truth#apex legends
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Maggie isn't great at social situations. She talks too much to make herself feel comfortable. But even when she feels comfortable, she doesn't understand cues. She likes being direct and people being direct with her.
Maggie says whatever comes to her mind without thinking it through. Her parents encouraged this. They thought it was good for her to let everything out and be her authentic self. But it also gets her into trouble sometimes because she can be loud and abrasive and strong in her opinions. She says the wrong thing even if she believes she's right. She can be insensitive.
And she tends to crumble after. She doubts herself. She immediately apologizes. She doesn't want to step on people's toes or take up too much space. She calls it bringing the thunder to give a name to it. To make herself feel powerful and less alone. She's like a superhero! She can be misunderstood, not well known, but she's good at her job and she reads a lot and she makes do. But that doesn't change the fact that she can also be judgmental and it comes out in the way she talks about situations without ever considering that the people she is talking to has experienced them.
#she's so flawed she's beautiful to me#she's also like sunshine#maggie sobbing bc her childhood feels like a lie bc her mom was cheating the entire time and they stayed together for her#but also bc her parents were getting divorced and she couldn't believe it#she smiles and I'm healed#she's good at being alone. she feels distance between her and the rest of the world#she's different. she's always been different. and she feels disconnected from the rest of the world#oh i love her#muse: maggie pierce#meta: maggie pierce
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hi, really sorry about your ankle, hope all your plans work out regardless. one of the things you can check yourself are the ottawa ankle rules (there are a lot tutorials) to check the possibility of something being broken (if you need an x-ray). doing it yourself is probably less reliable than an experienced person but you will at least have an idea of the broken-bones-possibility (in my experience people often break their 5th metatarsal when twisting their ankles because the poor thing is just out there :(. wishing you all the best!!
i saw some stuff about the ottawa rules when i did some googling! but tbh i need to go to the orthopedic urgent care regardless bc if it’s broken obviously and if it’s sprained i want guidance and assessment anyway and in the meantime i’m engaging in the time honored practices of taking lots of ibuprofen and sitting around with my foot on a heap of pillows
#sadly it is not looking good for my plans :(#even if they can bundle it up at the urgent care so it doesn’t hurt i don’t trust myself to drive 3 hours with my left foot#and i doubt mom will do it considering how wildly unsympathetic she’s been about this#ask maggie
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Does Erwin love coffee or tea?
He likes both! He prefers his tea cold and his coffee hot, but tends to drink coffee more overall. (Not for enjoyment, but for the caffeine.)
Related fun fact: his mom is a big tea drinker and his sister hates the taste of any and all teas with a burning passion!
#I imagine that Erwin's mom did not let Erwin and Maggie drink coffee growing up but was okay with teas (probably a good call on her part)#Thank you for your ask!! <3#strangerville outtakes#erwin pries#maggie pries#atfs ask#anon
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Guys we just passed a venue where Maggie Rogers is playing on the 31st and 1st? And tickets are available and $40? But it's in Portland which is almost 3 hours away from where we're actually staying :(
#i dont really listen to Maggie Rogers#but i know ive heard good things about her#and i LOVE!!! live music#if it was closer..... id definitely try#and we'd probably be able to do it actually#i might bring it up to my mom to see how she feels about the drive but idk#id go by myself but i cant bc i cant drive the f350 😭#im probably not allowed but i also refuse#itd be so cool to go to a little impromptu concert tho like!!!!#why is 3 hours away :(
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Maggie Tozier:
She was waiting on the day she hoped her baby would arrive
She'd never be alone Have someone to hold And when nights were cold She'd say
The world's not perfect, but it's not that bad If we got each other, and that's all we have I will be your mother, and I'll hold your hand You should know I'll be there for you When the world's not perfect When the world's not kind If we have each other, then we'll both be fine I will be your mother, and I'll hold your hand You should know I'll be there for you
@folkwh0r3
*Bonus younger Maggie and Wentworth*
#Spotify#Good mom Maggie Tozier#maggie tozier#richie tozier#wentworth tozier#tozier family#it#stephen king
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I saw the official ACGAS 2020 Twitter’s post for International Women’s Day, where they happened to put Helen and Maggie next to each other and noticed how ridiculously similar they look. So I took a screenshot of just that part so I could point it out.
#All Creatures Great and Small#ACGAS 2020#My Mom: They should have had Maggie be Helen's twin sister.#Good thing Mollie Winnard is blond playing Maggie. If she was brunette we'd never be able to tell if we were looking at Helen or at Maggie#And now I'm obsessed with the concept of Helen and Maggie being twin sisters.#Somebody cast Rachel and Mollie as sisters in something. (Either after this show ends or as something they do between seasons obviously.)#Headcanon that Helen and Maggie know they look alike but James and Tristan don't see it.#Mine
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hello mr gaiman. i’ve just finished watching good omens 2 (i’ve already watched it by myself) with my mom (who is very homophobic), and throughout my entire viewing i was VERY nervous on what her reaction to the kiss between aziraphale and crowley would be.
when we got to that scene, where aziraphale tells crowley about the offer from the metatron and whatnot, i was shaking a lot and trying to not show it, because i was so unbelievably nervous.
during that scene, i could see that my mom had started crying a little bit, tearing up, and whatnot. i think she was trying to hide it, but she’s my mother, and i can read her well, even if i don’t like to admit it.
when they kissed, i looked at my mom and saw she had a slight scowl on her face, but she still looked sad. absolutely heartbroken, which i was not expecting at all. i was expecting her to scoff, complain, go on a rant about how everything is gay nowadays, but no. she was just sad. and it shocked me, because my mother is— well, she’s my mother, and she’s complicated.
something that also surprised me, while watching, is that she didn’t complain at all about maggie and nina, or the few comments characters made referring to aziraphale and crowley as a romantic couple.
the first thing she said to me when the credits started rolling was, “is there going to be a season 3?” not anything about aziraphale and crowley, no complaints, nothing. just asking if there’s going to be a season 3. and i was absolutely shocked, because i had gotten myself all worked up about how she’d react to the ending of season 2.
so, in conclusion, thanks for potentially curing my mom’s long-lasting homophobia with good omens season 2. it was a lovely season, and i cannot wait for the potential season 3. thank you so much for normalizing queer characters in media, it really means the world to me and many other queer people around the world.
I'm so glad she was sad.
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Maggie Service at the London Comic Con Spring, 2.3.2023 :) ❤
Reporter: Also in Doctor Who but better known for her role in Good Omens, the series which promotes inclusivity, it was Maggie Service's first Comic Con.
Maggie: I've just had this lovely mom, who whose children aren't here today, but are non-binary and trans and - it's going to make me cry again - but they've just, you know, they've said that the character gives them a place to be.
#good omens#maggie service#maggie#videos#london comic con spring 2024#sister theresa garrulous#transcripts#interview#maggie interview#s2 interview
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casual; b.eilish
[▸] casual by chappell roan
smut
"So are you two finally together?" your friend asked taking a bite of the pizza you'd bought for the sleepover. Shrugging your shoulders you averted her gaze. You knew you were dumb. You were so dumb for still clinging on to her. But you couldn't help it. Your body, your heart, your soul yearned for her.
"I thought so," she replied sighing noticing the way your expression changed. The sudden wave of sadness washed over you. She slung an arm around your shoulder as you let your head fall onto her. That awful chest pain was back and you knew exactly why. Every time you were asked about her, it was present. Every time you had to tell someone you were just friends, it haunted you.
"She's hot and all, but she doesn't deserve you." The words rang in your ears as you felt the warm tears form at the corners of your eyes. How could she not? You felt it in your bones when she kissed you, when she caressed your face, when she cuddled you on her couch after giving you the most mind blowing orgasm.
She made you feel like someone worth having. Worth holding on to.
Except when she didn't. When she denied you like you were just another one of her friends.
Billie laughed at the comment made by someone in the group, you joined in the laughter leaning forward at the same time she did. It wasn't purposeful, you were just in sync. Your heads touched and her hand rested on your thigh trying to control the laughter.
As the night progressed, your bodies cozied on the couch. She leaned back, legs open. Your legs crossed, body leaning into hers. Her arm rested comfortably on the couch behind your shoulders; you occasionally felt her fingers graze your neck.
When someone said something she wasn't interested in, she'd whisper something in your ear pulling your attention away from the conversation. It was your turn to rest your hand on her thigh. It laid there naturally.
"When's the wedding?" someone called out catching both yours' and Billie's attention. Another joke thrown in the chatter of fleeting conversations. You felt your face grow warm and Billie chuckled removing her arm from around your shoulder.
"We're not together," she chuckled again running a finger along the corner of her mouth. She had to have known how that comment sounded after you spent the whole night practically sitting on her lap. She avoided your gaze the rest of the night.
That is until it was time to go. She had to look at you at some point. She was your ride home after all.
That should have been the last straw for you. How could you still hang around her? She'd shattered your heart in the span of one second with three cruel words: we're not together.
So why did it feel so good when she pulled up to your driveway and held your jaw so tenderly to give you a kiss that made your heart flutter? Why did it feel so good when she pushed your seat back hovering over your body still kissing you like her life depended on it?
Why did her hand wander up your skirt, fingers tapping along your thigh until they covered your clothed pussy? Why did you say yes when she asked if she could eat you out right here, right now? You were a fool, but a fool seeking pleasure. A fool who couldn't live without her.
You moaned her name holding on to the back of the headrest as her tongue rotated on your clit. Her lips touched the most sensitive parts of your body. You saw the way her eyes closed getting lost in your pussy, fingers now joining her mission to make you cum.
Her tongue pressed on your clit as three fingers slid into your pussy. Your legs quivered trying to stay open, but it was almost impossible with the way she fucked you so good. Holding her head, you moaned her name repeatedly wondering if you were the only one who'd ever moaned her name in this car.
In your head, you were. You justified your delusions with this question: if there were other girls, why would her mom be calling you in the middle of the day?
"Hi Maggie," you smiled holding the phone to your ear forgetting about the cookies you were in the middle of baking.
"Hi sweetheart, we're having dinner at our house for Finneas' birthday. I asked Billie if you were coming, she wasn't sure," her voice was sweet on the other side of the line and your heart wrenched at the mention of her name. Her family had been nothing but angels to you and you only suspected they were as confused about your situationship with Billie as you were. That didn’t stop her mom from texting you on occasion. You had photos of her garden, the vegan cookies she baked followed by the recipe.
"Um," you struggled finding an answer. Biting on your thumb, you contemplated. Would Billie be okay with it? If this was casual, why was her mom calling you about her brother's birthday dinner? Surely if Billie had wanted you there, she would've called. Texted even.
“I’m making something delicious, you’ll love it,” she pleaded. You heard your oven beep and rushed to the kitchen. Opening the oven lid, you tried airing out the smoke.
"I'll be there," you confirmed.
That was okay, right? Her mom was inviting you. It'd be rude of you not to go.
"Are you staying tonight?" Billie asked as you helped clear the table.
"Do you want me to?" you asked raising your head to look at her. You made eye contact with her and she quickly cleared her throat grabbing something from the table. Say yes. Say you want me to. Your thoughts implored.
"It's late and you know my mom. She'll insist you stay," she shrugged walking to the kitchen. You watched her leave. Sure, you'd accept that reason.
As on cue Finneas peeped into the dining room, "mom asked if you're staying the night?"
"Uh," you looked at him. "Yeah, if that's okay." You smiled.
"You know you're always welcome," his eyes were warm unlike hers a few minutes ago. They were inviting. Sometimes you wondered if she shared things with him about you. If she even mentioned you. If any of their song lyrics were entwined with your ... relationship for lack of a better word. Or if he just felt sorry for you. If he saw how desperately you clung on to her. Did she mention you were just 'casual'?
Later that night you laid in her childhood room. She was at the other side of the bed still scrolling through her phone. The side of your face rested on her pillow, hands tucked under the cushion. Her face glowed under the fluorescent light of the phone screen.
She smiled at something double tapping with her thumb. You couldn't tell what it was. You didn't care. It was like you were invisible.
Billie noticed your silence, she placed the phone down momentarily. "You okay?" she asked turning her head to you. You nodded silently.
"Come here," she extended her arm and you scooted closer to her until you were resting your head on her arm. "You want to watch TikToks?" she asked and you nodded contently holding the blanket closer to your face.
Her thumb scrolled down the endless stream of videos. There were a few that were edits of her and your heart thumped each time. She was so adored and everyone wanted her. Including you. She liked a few and you noticed the way her face lit up each time.
"Us," she said turning the phone closer to you so you could see and read the text clearly. You chuckled and that simple moment made your chest fill with butterflies again. She was thinking of an ‘us’. You brought your body closer to hers and soon the phone was long forgotten. Your limbs were now entwined, lips connecting messily.
Your hands found a comfortable place in her hair and she groaned as you pushed yourself down harder on her. She held the back of your neck as she desperately fought for dominance. You sat up pulling your shirt, her shirt, over your head. Your hard nipples caught her attention and she cupped your breasts, lips parting as you swayed your hips.
"Where's your bra?" she asked cheekily and you smiled down at her.
"At your house," you whispered coming down to kiss her again. It was both a cheeky response, but a very true statement. Your favorite bra was still at her house. Somewhere in her drawer resting with her things like it belong there permanently.
Yeah, there was nothing - absolutely nothing - casual about this.
Except, of course, you weren't together. No labels. Except casual. Because she flirted with anything that walked. She laughed at everyone's corny jokes as you watched from a distance trying not to look phased. Trying to ignore the daunting feeling in your chest.
It was cool. You 'weren't together' remember?
Fuck.
Then why were you out at dinner with her parents. Twice this week already. Why was she brushing her leg against yours? Why were her fingers dancing on your thigh?
"Can you come with me to the bathroom?" you asked excusing yourself from the table. Billie followed, no questions asked.
Your bodies stumbled into the stall and you pushed her against the wall fumbling with her jeans. When you managed to get them undone, your hand slipped into her underwear. She squirmed and moaned quietly as your fingers found her clit.
You kissed her neck and her body quivered, each stroke bringing her closer to the edge. She held on to the railing in the bathroom stall as you fucked into her with two fingers.
"Please," she hummed against your cheek as you brought her closer and closer. "Don't stop," she whined again now clinging to your shoulders, finding your lips. She kissed you and it felt like just the two of you floating through space. Her tongue found yours and it felt like a million little stars exploding in your mouth.
Your fingers were ruthless. They were both a source of pleasure and strike. You channeled your anger in your movements. Because you were allowed to be angry.
How dare she think she had all the power? How dare she let people think you were just another girl? Especially when you were the only girl who could make her forget everything. The only girl who could make her lose herself in the bathroom stall of a restaurant. Chanting your name like it was the only word she knew.
When you felt her walls clench, you slowed your hand. She was throbbing. She rocked her hips fucking herself on your fingers. Suddenly she was shaking, moaning, gripping your body like you were her lifeline.
You buttoned her jeans and fixed her hair. You wiped your lipgloss stained chin and pulled down dress.
When you returned to the table, her parents were oblivious; stranded in their own world.
With your lips swollen, hair slightly out of place, you felt her hand under the table. It searched for yours in the darkness. Your fingers linked together and you felt the soft tender squeeze from her grip. A grip that felt like a plea. ‘Don’t leave me.’
She glanced over at you flashing you a look. A look that warmed your heart. It coursed through your veins, made your heart beat faster. You didn't have time to process what was happening. She brought your laced fingers to her lips and kissed the back of your hand. Then your tangled fingers rested on her lap for the duration of the dinner.
Fuck casual.
•
part two
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