#made fun of you crying then demended an apology later even tho u were sobbing in ur room and ur mom was talking about what an awful perso
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kinda wish i didn’t get triggered in my house so often. such is life
#personal#me cleaning the kitchens: oh here’s the cupboard my brother broke but my mom got mad at me for not fixing faster. okay.#oh yeah i remember when i made mom a sandwich and then when i asked if she could just eat it as is after she asked me to toast it she threw#it at the wall and i had to clean it up after#oh hey washing my hands i remember my dad calling me his angel and not to leave him while i walked him to and from the bathroom#now let’s remember him screaming for help in the hospital top of his lungs after i explained we couldn’t remove the hand restraints bc he#was hurting himself that’s cool. also his neighbor who would just scream for hours on end and was maybe a year younger than me#i hope he’s doing better#or a big one in a thing my city is known for and everytime i see it im like oh yeah the first time i went there i had a huge break down#like jumping up and down crying over a dad thing#that’s more outside the house but someone made a comment after i mentioned it as a bad memory and it’s been a worse memory since#bc it just feel like all i have as reference is terrible things#or i was mopping the floor thinking about my brother coming to town and holidays and sure everything’s fine between us but#holidays aren’t usually good for me.#like ohhhh cleaning the kitchen#remember that time ben said he’d help and you got annoyed he didn’t so he absolutely tore you a new one of how awful of a person you were#made fun of you crying then demended an apology later even tho u were sobbing in ur room and ur mom was talking about what an awful perso#you are and he was talking about how you’re ruining the holiday#and then you drank most of ur beers in one night bc it was awful#or christmas when ur brother broke ur door after u left the room he was kicking apart and screaming about how this is ur fault#getting little flashes of those memories randomly for literally any room or my house is so epic and im so normal about it#you know what i kinda forget how fucked up my family is till i write it down bc like in the moment#oh bad memeory moving on bc im gonna get real upset but hm. gonna be normal about this and surely don’t have long lasting issues
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