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M.Ed. Admission Guide: Who is Eligible and How to Apply
Are you excited to make your career as a professor, principal, or education policy analyst? If yes, then you have come to the right place and have picked up the relevant article. The master of education course is a two-year postgraduate degree program that has been prepared for those who want to advance their professional career growth in the teaching sector as professors in colleges or…
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sometimes you start to wonder what the historical record for the guys you made up looks like in the fictional world where they existed. and then you make some fake documents about it.
[moth and compass is a collaboration with @natdrinkstea!!!]
#em draws stuff#oc time again hehe#moth and compass#the lieutenant: chadwick goodfellow#the cannon spike: matthew worley#Get Wikipedia-ed! [my writing style is not very good but you'd best believe that my typefaces and colors are as accurate as can be]#do not really like the way that semi-realistic older matthew turned out but I was tired of looking at him. So.#genuinely very proud of Poorly Scanned PDF Goodfellow though. fiddled around with textured eraser settings for Hours and it was Worth It.#anyway now it's FUNFACTS time! since this is of course not the only lore that there is on these guys#but just what one might find if you tried to research them now in m&c-verse#as we are in the timeline where these are just guys from mine and nat's heads there is More That Can Be Said#such as that the drawing of goodfellow in that article is copied from the second portrait of him#and if you've been paying attention to previous goodfellow drawings you may have seen it!#I've also previously drawn the midshipman miniature and it's around somewhere as well#also matthew + faith + george were all in a relationship while george was alive#but too few of their letters survive for wikipedia editors to confirm that :/#I feel. Weird about posting this for some reason. but it may just be on account of that it is fully 1am when I'm writing this. ah well.#also the places mentioned in here are Made Up also#there Was in fact a historical hms ophelia but she was over a hundred years later so Shhhh
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messed up at work again bc no one left me instructions. feel like ending it all 😩
#helpppp why would she not leave instructions for something so important!! and i need to do it again three more times!! i’m stressed!!#for context the librarian i’m subbing for like. didn’t tell me i have to walk to two classes to read to special ed kids#it’s not even written on the schedule#so the teacher called me like hey where are you please bring a book#and when i showed up that’s when the paras said it’s a special ed class#so i was totally unprepared and i tried to make it interactive as i read to them but i had no idea what i was doing#because the book had more words than i’d ordinarily pick if i knew i was reading to children with learning disabilities#and i’d showed it to the teacher beforehand and asked if i should forego the words and just discuss the pictures interactively#and she said no?? so of course the kids weren’t really interested in it#i asked to sit down because it’d be better to connect with them if i were at their level but she said no the librarian usually stands#and i’m just so?? thrown for a loop?? bc if i’m not supposed to use the strategies i’d think to use then like what does she normally do??#the teachers and paras were obviously unimpressed and i don’t know how to do better#i have a simpler book in mind next week m#but i need to read to a second special ed class tomorrow and i don’t know how i would prepare/how to be more interactive than i already am??#so i’m terribly embarrassed and i want to do better for the kids i just have no idea how#i’m trying to look strategies up but everything is vague like ‘point out pictures!! be interactive!!’ that’s what i do!!!!! i need specifics#ughhhh#anyways.txt
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If I remembered how to write I'd write something about Sam developing an eating disorder earlier in life as a way to gain some kind of sense of belonging to himself (since he's been othered in every other aspect of his life), and how that has lingered throughout his entire life and has came back with a bang after the demon blood revelation at the end of season 2 plus the whole loss of body autonomy he experiences later on, this time also has a way to feel some type of agency towards his body and his decisions
#Too bad I don't remember how to write 👍 if anyone has some fic recs similar to this I'd love to read them 💕#I just finished season 4 and my heart is so jeavy#That poor kid#m#supernatural#sam#I mean yes sure he made his choices ecc ecc he's not just a blameless victim of course of course but bro... A demon bleed in his mouth when#Was 6 months old so I'm gonna feel bad for all this arc ok. It's on me.#Ed tw
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𝐌𝐎𝐎𝐍𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 | Joel Miller x reader
↝ other fics | requests? | ao3 | update blog | fic rec | ko-fi
summary | a series of nights spent with a neighbor you find an unlikely connection with, sharing a similar interest to pass the time, it forms into something much more intense and suddenly, neither of you can deny it anymore.
content warning | no outbreak!joel, f!reader that is mentioned to have hair that can be pushed back but no exact length, descriptions of outfits, lots of w*ed smoking/consuming ed*bles, a quick mention of a burn, joel being a good neighbor, he's still the biggest girl dad, age gap implied but readers isn't specified, joel's not afraid to go for what he wants, most of the interactions happen while they're high so please keep that in mind when reading, lotsa boob worship, fingering, oral (m receiving), unprotected p in v, mentions of joel being sterile, strangers to friends to lovers. this was written over the course of a weekend don't look at me
word count — 8k
The first and only time you see him is when you’re moving in next door, trudging in the moving boxes on your own as he seems to ready up his own truck full of boxes, followed by two younger women who seem to be bickering at him and he bypasses them with a smug smile on his face—he’s older, so you came to your own assumption that it was probably his daughters.
That’s all you know about him.
Outside of the fact he drives a truck, works long hours, and that his name is Joel.
The girl with the begrudging smile and worn out converse called his name while you were throwing away your trash and trying to not seem like the nosey neighbor.
He comes, he goes. The roar of his truck is all you hear and you never really see him outside of an occasional swish of his curtains through your own windows, but occasionally you leave your trash can out by the curb longer than necessary and it magically appears at the beginning of your driveway.
Now, you don’t want to point fingers—but the only ones tucked away are his and your own, leaving the other neighbors to fend for themselves.
It’s a simple gesture, kind.
You want to thank him but you never get the chance.
You’re curious if he’s a night owl—lights staying on even into the early hours of the morning, shadows crossing around his living room that you can see from your bedroom window, tossing and turning most nights as you struggle and struggle to fall asleep.
You’ve learned methods to help, plenty—if you ever remember to charge your vibrator it was usually your first choice, a quick release of some of the built up tension over the day and you could eventually find it easier to fall asleep. But, your tried and true method was weed.
That was it. Sometimes you didn’t even need much—an edible to curb the anxiety that filled you, a puff or two at the pen you had stashed away in your bedside drawer, but most of the time it was occupying your mind with the work of rolling the joint before smoking it out your bedroom window that helped the best.
However, tonight was different.
You toss and turn and fling the blankets away that stick to your skin, the broken ceiling fan doing nothing to quell that muggy heat that was permeating in your house from earlier in the day—it just sat frozen, menacing and taunting at you. You search through the drawer at your bedside for the small tin case covered in stickers of various interests and things you enjoyed, kicking the sliding backdoor with your foot as you traveled through the living room to your kitchen and stepping out onto your back deck.
It’s still hot, but the breeze allows a noticeable difference.
You work quietly, hunched slightly over the railing and using the faint glow of the light hanging beside your backdoor, just finishing up rolling the joint as you bring it to your tongue and the distinct creak from the house next to you grabs your attention—the sliding door mimicking your own.
Your heart races and you don’t know why. It could be one of the girls, still strangers but somehow you find it easier to look that way if it was them—Joel was intimidating, the aura he carried within just a few seconds of a glance.
It is him, unfortunately—and suddenly you feel the need to hide your stash, tossing the tin box in the cheap plastic chair you bought when you first moved in. Tucking yourself away as you light the joint and bring it to your lips.
He’s being surprisingly noisy, chair scuffing the deck as he moves it around and you look at him curiously from across the way, a fence and several feet of grass dividing you both. You can see the mug clutched in his right hand and his left hand filled with a few various things. A phone, for sure—lighting up in his hand before he lays it on the table beside him, lifting a leg over the lounge chair in a straddle-like motion before he sits down.
And he does seem like a smoker, not that you have proof or theory—it was just the vibe, but as he lights the item in his hand and takes a slow drag you quickly realize there's not an ounce of nicotine in sight. It’s clear when he catches your gaze and his brow furrows slightly, noting the similar item tucked between your own fingers and you can’t help but laugh to yourself.
You don’t say a word. Neither does he. But, he does offer a weak smile when you grab the tin box from the chair, nodding in acknowledgement. Your entire body flutters to life for some weird reason that you will absolutely blame on the THC obscuring rational thought.
Thankfully, sleep comes easy after that.
–
But, it doesn’t stay that way.
Most of the time you stay tucked inside, especially on the days and nights when the heat wasn’t as ablaze as usual, but there is usually a day or two out of the week where you find yourself outside—sometimes you lounge, or pace, but it never fails that the moment you step foot outside your backdoor, Joel does too.
Once a week, rarely twice—though it does happen, both of you find yourself in quiet submission as you smoke and enjoy the peace, even with the constant click of crickets and lighting bugs that seem attracted to both of your houses, flying around your backyard in a small swarm.
And you wanted to keep your distance, not wanting to impose on his space but your two months into these unspoken nightly meetings when your cheap lighter finally decides to shit itself, offering nothing but dull sparks against your overworked thumb, trying and failing to light the end of the joint.
Joel had been watching, an amused smile growing on his face as you cursed and tossed the lighter into your yard out of frustration—you’d grab it later, whatever. Eventually you sigh, giving up on it for the night and turning to pack away your stuff before Joel is calling over to you from his side of the fence, heart dropping into your stomach at the sound of his voice.
“I got a light,” He offers, “if you’re interested?”
It’s definitely a question. A proposition. An offering.
You scratch at your brow and hesitate for a millisecond, not giving yourself enough time to debate your answer before you’re mumbling “Fuck it,” and taking the path down the steps and to the gate that separated your yards, watching as he stepped toward you all in the same breath, feeling so much more intimidating this close—the smell of him, musky and sweet. His hair was wet, too.
He took a shower, got dressed, and immediately decided to step back out into the humid heat of Texas summer.
You pluck the lighter from his grip with a soft tug, flicking open the top. It was a good lighter, not the crappy three-pack you bought at the gas station down the road—it was chrome, engraved with a JM, and soft to the touch. You admire it for half a second before you attempt to light the end of your joint, still tucked between your lips.
But, as fate would have it, you make a fool of yourself. It wasn’t that you couldn’t get it lit, but that the wind was being your worst enemy in a situation where you just wanted to smoke the goddamn joint and go to bed.
Joel puffs at the joint between his lips and breathes out the smoke through his nose before he huffs out a low laugh and nods in your direction, reaching his arms over the fence and beckoning with his fingers for you to hand the lighter back over. You nearly go cross-eyed as his hands come toward your face—much larger than your own and far better at keeping the flame strong, he peeks around his cupped palm and waits for the end to turn a bright orange before he pulls away and you eagerly pull the smoke into your lungs.
“Thank you,” You tell him, rubbing your bare feet into the grass beneath you, patchy and poorly cut from your own mow job, but you were working the best with what you had—even if it was an ancient lawn mower you snagged at a garage sale that only worked half of the time.
You didn’t like to ask for help, hated it. But, here you were, taking help from a stranger.
Well, neighbor.
It didn’t feel fair to call him a stranger anymore, even if you’ve only spoken a little under ten words to him.
“No problem, sugar,” Joel responds and your cheeks burn with heat, that distinct nervousness spreading throughout your body that couldn’t be mistaken with anything else, “curious, though—you ain’t ever thought about investin' in a good lighter?”
You shrug, tapping away the ash gently with your fingertip and taking another puff, “Why? My neighbor’s got a perfectly good one himself?”
Joel raises his brows in unison and smiles slightly, he laughs. It’s more of a lazy chuckle.
“I… have more. I just lose them a lot. Besides, they’re only like ten bucks a pack.”
You’re waiting for him to cut the conversation short and walk back to his chair, but he finds himself leaning, arms tucked and crossed over the fence, oblivious to how daunting this felt to you—the man you’ve been so helplessly curious about for months suddenly standing in front of you and interested, unbothered…not at all what you expected from him.
“Thanks for constantly moving my trash bins,” You tell him randomly, blowing the smoke out through your lips as you tilt your chin up, “I always forget.”
Joel makes a face, wordlessly offering an “I know,” with his eyes and you roll yours in return, following it with a laugh as you pop a hip out slightly, leaning most of your weight onto one leg and crossing your arms over your chest, suddenly remembering how bare you were under your thin top, assuming you’ve probably already given him quite the show already.
Though, Joel seems like the type of man to be nice enough not to point it out.
You perk up suddenly, asking the first thing that comes to mind.
"Can I ask a question?"
Joel nods.
“What’s the JM stand for? On your lighter.”
“Sweetheart,” The laugh shakes his entire chest, “come on now.”
From sugar to sweetheart—you were clearly making quite the impression on him.
When you don’t respond he answers your question.
“Joel. Miller. I figured that was obvious,” He says, stubbing out the end of his joint into the wood on his side of the fence.
“Oh.”
“It’s on the mailbox.”
Curious, you leave him for a brief moment to slip through the side gate of your yard and….yeah, sure enough.
“I swear I’m not always like this,” You tell him as you make your way back over, forcing away the smile that was creeping its way onto your face.
“Too bad,” He responds, carding fingers through his still slightly damp hair before running his open palm over his beard, scratching at his chin, “s’pretty entertaining.”
“O-kay,” You answer, sarcasm smothering your tone, “I think it’s my bedtime, Joel Miller.”
“Goodnight then,” He bows his head slightly, “neighbor.”
The tone of it makes you snort with a soft laugh, flipping him off as you depart.
Suddenly, Joel Miller doesn’t seem all that scary.
–
The next week is suspiciously quiet, to your surprise. You’ve opted out of keeping yourself inside now that you had a friend to keep you company, but when he doesn’t show up after a few minutes, you can’t explain why you feel disappointed.
Next week is the same, his house suspiciously dark.
You can’t pass judgment—he could be busy, tired, or there could be no reason at all.
But, the need in you is there—for what, you’re not even sure.
By the third week you’re ready with a peace offering, a truce.
That night his lights are on and he’s even moving around, somewhere in his kitchen you’re assuming, but instead of sneaking out into the backyard you’re crossing over your front lawn and into his, seemingly fresh mowed and smelling of wet grass, having been under mostly rain showers all night and you knock at his door.
You don’t realize you’re holding your breath until the door opens and you smile at the sight of him, sleep pants hanging low on his hips and his shirt slightly raised by his stomach. He looks exhausted, eyes puffy with sleep as he rubs at them with his knuckles, but he doesn’t look displeased at the sight of you—in fact, he almost smiles in response.
One rolled joint in your left hand, a second in your right. It’s a wordless gesture that makes Joel scoff in amusement and nod you inside of his home. His home. That you’ve never seen until now. You were in his house and it was the most casual thing in the world. You don’t linger for long, following him toward the sliding door to his backyard but the place feels…homey. Lived in. So much unlike your own and disorganized in a way that showed years of age and memories, pictures scattered along the walls and years of personal crafts that you couldn’t examine for as long as you wished.
“Sorry I disappeared,” He acknowledges the unasked question, even though it lingered on your tongue, “—got a huge job at work, getting the site ready has been a pain in my ass.”
You share the lounge chair, taking a seat against the part of the chair that was propped up while Joel opts for the end, giving you a comfortable amount of space to stretch out if you wanted but also, and maybe instinctively, trying not to pressure you into feeling like you had to share space with him.
“Can I ask?”
Like a goddamn broken record, Joel chuckles at that. Full and genuine as he lights the end of the joint and wordlessly helps you, the same cupping motion of his hands that you welcome this time, almost eagerly.
“Ya gotta stop askin’ that,” Joel says, “especially when you’re just gonna ask anyways.”
Well.
“I’m a carpenter. Long hours, got a bad sleep schedule ‘cause of it. Pays good, though.”
“Oh, that’s…”
“Not interesting at all, I know.”
“No—no, I mean. I don’t know what I was expecting you to say. That sounds…fun?”
“If you think busted knuckles and an achy back is fun—but I’m old, can’t really escape that.”
You laugh under your breath and inhale the joint between your lips, blowing it out as you speak.
“You are not old, Joel. Come on.”
“I’ve got two fully grown daughters in college and a 401k callin’ my name in about a decade.”
“So, what? Fifty five? Fifty six? You can do better than that.”
“You’re a little shit, you know that?”
You shrug at him, a satisfied smirk stretching over your face.
It’s a back and forth game you play for a while—nights spent at his house where you bicker back and forth, offering snacks and occasionally getting the royal treatment of dinner or a late-night breakfast if Joel was feeling too antsy to sleep.
He never flirts, really. Despite how you don’t cover up around him for his own sake, always showing up in your sleep clothes that barely allowed for any modesty or the summer clothes that clung to your body and hugged your curves, allowing his eyes to trace and outline all over your figure as much as he wanted to—and sometimes he did, catching his gaze on you for a brief moment before it fades.
But, the first crack in his hard facade comes over a late night meal of pancakes and bacon, grabbing the blueberries from his fridge as he fries the meat on the stove, his elbow bumping the fridge door and knocking the small plastic box of blueberries out of your hand and to the floor, a surprised yelp coming from your throat as you scramble to catch them all.
“Shit, shit—I’m sorry, that was my fault.” You apologize, picking at the blueberries that didn’t make it, shoveling them into your hand and Joel leans down slowly, kneeling as he scoops the tainted blueberries into his own hand and dumps them in the trash.
“My bad, baby—that was on me,” It flows off his tongue with ease and if he realizes he’s said it, he doesn’t acknowledge it, “damn grease popped at me—go on, sit down. I’ll clean the rest up and we can use up what’s left.”
You both enjoy your meal without a blip, not daring to address the slip-up—he peppers you with sugars and sweethearts and the occasional honey when you get a little too combative over a topic, but never baby.
The second time is less surprising and more of a comfort, if you’re being honest with yourself.
Again, struggling with his lighter—this time your hand is holding one of those sparklers you haven’t touched since you were a child—leftovers from the bunch that Sarah and Ellie, his two daughters had brought home over the holiday. You never came over, despite his insisting invitation and running into his brother Tommy on the way home the night prior to the Fourth of July. He'd insisted too.
It just won’t light—and Joel had made the mistake of getting a few of them wet when he’d cleaned off his deck that night and suddenly you’re wondering it’s just a dud.
You hover the flame, mind drifting as you watch the flame grow and you don’t realize you’re burning yourself until Joel is pulling the items from your hands, dropping you back down into reality as you feel the sting, the sudden burn to your thumb as Joel says something that you don’t quite hear at first.
“Sweetheart, you gotta pay attention—“
You look up at him meekly and he pulls you inside with a nod of his, turning on the cold water and pulling your hand under the stream.
“Where’d you go?”
You raise your eyebrows in question, the lingering high drifting off from earlier in the night.
“Oh—just, kinda spaced out, I guess?”
Joel rubs his thumb over yours gingerly and turns off the water, grabbing you a clean washcloth stuffed with a couple pieces of ice to soothe the burn for the time being.
“Baby, you really gotta be more careful.”
Your head snaps over to him as he threw a damp paper towel into the trash and watches the sudden realization cross your face—looking for uneasiness, fear, worry; but in an instant, your body relaxes and you shake your head.
“I promise. It won’t happen again.”
You see the way his lips part slightly, almost as if he’s gearing to add a, “Me too,” for a different reason, but it never comes.
-
Near the end of summer, you find yourself there again.
But, things feel different.
“So, I’ve got a surprise.”
Joel leans up at your words, arm resting over his knees as you plop the bag down on the table beside the chair—Joel looks slightly worried, eyes flicking toward you and back at the bag.
“Don’t tell me you’ve never tried edibles.”
“It’s not really my thing, sugar—”
“Joel, you’ve been smoking longer than I’ve been alive.”
“Now, you know that don’t mean a damn thing.”
You shake your head in fake dismay, slipping your hand into the bag to grab a few pieces.
One for him…a couple for you.
“Aren’t those supposed to be pretty strong?”
You shrug, “I think it depends. Person to person. I’ve never tried these before, but I’ve never had a bad trip, so…”
Joel’s eyes linger, finger poking at the small, cube gummy in your hand like a child discovering a new toy.
“Hey, we’re doing this together,” You offer as a half-assed comfort, “so if it sucks, it’ll suck for both of us.”
Joel doesn’t seem to need much convincing, though. He plucks the gummy from your palm and places it on his tongue, watching as you do the same and you chew, settling back on your palms at the end of the chair, feet outstretched and crossed in front of you as you stare up at the sky.
It was a Waxing Gibbous moon, not quite full but nearly there—it hovered over Joel’s house, just enough light to illuminate the space between you two. And you wait in comfortable silence aside from the low hum of music playing inside Joel’s house, dark inside now that he had turned off all the lights as you had followed him outside.
He always spent more time out here with you than he intended nowadays.
By a half hour, you find the idle conversation quickly divulges into things more obscure, your gaze lingering on the sky longer than you realize and Joel speaks to you softly, your heart pounding slowly in your ears.
“It ain’t going nowhere.”
You turn to him slightly, blinking a few times before you realize what he’s referring to.
“Oh. Well, obviously. It’s just pretty. I could stare at it all night.”
“Can’t blame you,” Joel responds, but his eyes are nowhere near the sky.
Oblivious, your gaze lingers upwards still, leaning back so far on your hands you feel yourself slip and yelp, only caught by Joel’s hands nearly a second short of a serious head injury.
“Come here,” Joel beckons, fingers wrapping around your bicep as he pulls you forward until your back is against his chest and he allows you to lean into him, feeling him clear his throat behind you as he keeps his hands a respectable distance despite how easily he’d move you into this position to begin with.
Commendable? Sure. Frustrating? Absolutely.
If you couldn’t feel the hard, solid line of his body at your backside it wouldn’t bother you so much. And the heat of his body, scolding to the touch like a furnace. He ran hot, that much you already knew just by a few faint touches before but this—it overwhelms your senses.
You try to distract yourself, noticing the carved out wooden statue of a cowboy riding a horse while it was rearing back, you squint your eyes before perking up with a sudden question.
“Where’d you get that?”
“Get what?”
You giggle slightly, tapping at his arm to grab his attention before you point in the direction of the statue placed by the stairs, “That thing.”
“Oh, that—I…made it.” He looks away with a sudden embarrassment as you quickly twist your head up to look at him in complete and utter shock—he scrunches his face up and dares to take a peek at you from his peripheral and his face heats up when he sees you looking so rapt.
“Joel, that is insanely fucking good.”
“Sweetheart—”
“Don’t sweetheart me,” You mock his tone, “how long did that take to make?”
Joel tries to think—it’s been years now. Sarah was barely out of grade school and he had just adopted Ellie, it was all a blur anymore with both of the girls in college now.
“A month, on and off between jobs. It’s just a piece of junk, really.”
“Joel, shut up.”
Joel can’t hold back the even bigger laugh that escapes him at your bluntness.
“It’s just a hobby.”
“A hobby you seem to be really fuckin’ good at.”
Joel shrugs and you decide to leave it be, relaxing back into his chest more comfortably, though his arm lingers more closely to your body, fingertips resting against your bicep that slowly start to move on their own, whether by Joel’s own conscious movements or just by nature of seeking touch. It’s a gentle trace, it tickles and you shrug your arm slightly to which he responds with a gentle squeeze.
By the hour mark you find that Joel hates when you ask about his statues or some of the homemade structures in his backyard—littered throughout along with an old playhouse that you can only assume belonged to his daughters, much outgrown and covered in vines and weeds, intertwined through cracks in the wood.
He hates it so much he actually tries to distract you with something else. Anything.
Unfortunately, nothing really works. So, he changes gears completely.
“What’s with the sundress tonight?” Joel asks suddenly, the playful lilt to his voice hidden behind a sudden need for authority over the situation. “Gettin’ all dolled up in the middle of the night.”
“It’s new,” You say with an eagerness, rubbing your finger over the silk fabric of the dress, “do you like it?”
“You really askin’ my opinion?”
Of course. I bought it for you.
“Do you have one?” You say instead.
“It’s nice,” He runs his pointer finger and thumb over the strap on your left shoulder that slips down, lingering against your skin as his palm covers the expanse of it.
His touch feels far away but so intense, head swirling with thoughts you can’t follow—there’s a primal need there, though. And you can’t tell if he feels it too. If it’s just the weed in your system or if it’s weeks and weeks of built up tension boiling over the edge.
This is the closest Joel has allowed you to be—he’s relaxed, his barriers are down and the hand lingering on your elbow is careful but explorative, his fingers trailing to the middle of your chest, flipping the small silver necklace around your neck under his fingertips, feeling so delicate. More importantly, he feels your heart, stretching the palm out wide and over your skin.
“Y‘alright?”
You nod and shuffle your feet, planting them on the end of the chair as you pull your knees up, the dress falling just at the apex of your thighs, barely allowing any modesty and if you spread your thighs even a half inch—
Joel breaks his eyes away, watching the slow rise and fall of your chest despite your rapidly beating heart.
“That heart of yours is racin’, sugar. Are you sure?”
Again, you nod. But, the subtle shift against him forces his fingers lower as you adjust yourself higher, ass pressed right against his groin and it does no favor for Joel, who’s fingers dip just below the fabric of your dress in the process, grazing down the center of your chest.
“You nervous or something?”
Nervous, no. Joel didn’t make you nervous anymore. The heat between your legs told you otherwise, and the need for touch was impossible to ignore and maybe just for a moment—just a second, you could let him. It would solve this ridiculous ache that had grown between your legs.
Joel seems so in tune with you and he sees the way your eyes are locked on his hand, unmoving but the half of his fingers tucked under the top of your dress.
“You don’t make me nervous, Joel.”
That wasn’t necessarily the question—and suddenly, you realize your misstep, looking up at him suddenly to catch the intense look on his face, almost like he was anticipating your gaze. His bottom lip is slightly parted from his top, face flush from the summer heat but his eyes are dark, follow the path of your face until it lands on his hand and then he speaks.
“What is it then?”
The way you press your thighs together at the sound of his voice, low and heated, spoken behind a gaze that made you feel small but admired.
Touch me. Make it better.
You don’t say it, it’s only a thought.
But, Joel is a mind reader. He never leaves your sight, but his hand moves on its own accord and squeezes your breast gently. His rough and calloused palm is a stark contrast over soft skin and if you would have made any sign of not wanting this, he would’ve pulled away.
Instead, your chest cants under his touch and your head nods without an answer to his question, because he already knew.
“Lemme see ‘em, sweetheart,” It takes little effort to pull the straps down your shoulders, his other hand pushing the fabric just below your breasts, allowing them free and Joel makes a soft, low noise behind you as he covers your chest with both hands, thumbs grazing over your nipples as they pebble under his touch, “that feel better?”
Not good. Not alright. Better—was he helping you? Was he soothing that ache he’d created?
“Y-Yeah, yes.”
He’s just as curious, squeezing the flesh in hands and occasionally letting his finger trace down your abdomen as your dress shifts and shifts until it’s barely a means to keeping your modesty over your lap, hands pressed down at the space beside Joel’s hips as you push yourself up until your head is nearly level with his, his hands squeezing your tits together as you sigh. He hooks his chin over you shoulder and watches, your eyes falling shut as you lean your head back.
“You need more?” He asks, “Tell me, baby—I’m right here.”
The baby rings through your head like a warning bell.
Once was an accident, twice a coincidence, three times…
Stop it. Stop it now and you won’t have to face the awkwardness after your high wore off and you both had a night to sleep and think and regret—but you find yourself nodding anyway.
Why was Joel any different from a random hookup? Other than being your neighbor, slowly coming to what you consider to be a friend, crumbling apart before you as he hikes your dress up over your hips and grips it tight.
You nod to his question.
“Take those off,” He speaks over your shoulder and you don’t need persuading, fingers hooking into the underwear clinging to your hips and down, over your ankles as you kick them away and almost instantly Joel’s hands are on your knees, spreading you wide, his palms squeezing at the inside of your thigh, “shit, look at that—“
He dips a finger down the center of your pussy, through the slick pool of accumulated pleasure and pulls away, shiny and glistening against his fingertips as he breathes against the shell of your ear, “All that just from me touchin’ you?”
You could answer—keep dragging out this game of cat and mouse that had started between you but instead you reach for his hand, placing it against your cunt as he cups it with his palm, dragging the two middle most fingers up and down the seam, circling over your clit briefly before they’re plunging inside of you with ease, aided by just how wet you were—your pussy throbs around his fingers.
Words are few and far between outside of the soft, mewling noises you make into the side of his face as your arm comes up and wraps around the back of his neck, yanking at the short hair at his nape and dragging your mouth along his cheek as you breath out in short huffs, his other hand coming down to circle at your clit with no preamble—straight for the kill and eager without saying it.
His grip is heavy, forceful as his fingers pump in and out of you pussy with little care, the soft squelch of your arousal around his fingers forcing the heat to climb to your face and you feel his jeans rutting into the backside, desperate for relief just as much as you but too selfless to speak up about it.
And you feel the crest in your chest, eyes squeezing shut as your pussy flutters around his fingers, a shout that is quickly muffled by Joel’s hand as it covers your mouth, the fingers still buried inside of you and working you through the aftershocks as he shushes you gently. Your body feels like it’s vibrating, legs shaking slightly as he removes his fingers and squeezes tenderly at the inside of your thigh, feeling the dampness from his fingers spread over your skin before they’re climbing their way up your body, along your skin until he’s bringing them to his mouth silently and cleaning them up like he’d made a mess of his meal, your eyes widen at the sight and you feel overtaken, flooded with desire that you can’t sit and suffer with any longer.
“Knew I was right in callin’ you sugar,” He teases, catching your face in between his fingers as you turn to kneel between his legs, “so damn sweet.”
His fingers tap at his thighs, rough denim under his fingertips to match his overworked, weathered hands and you can’t help but admire, knowing they had been buried inside of you a few moments ago and you bow your head, popping the button of Joel’s jeans as he casually reaches for your hips, kneading the muscle of your thighs as he watches, helping you situate his jeans far enough down his own thighs that you can slip your hands past his boxers, straining against the weight of his cock, hard and aching as it reached up toward his stomach.
“Sweetheart, you don’t have to,” He tells you, but you scoff slightly in amusement, not wanting to know how frazzled you look, half-lidded and bloodshot eyes under the moonlight, bare aside from the newly bought dress at your waist and Joel is most definitely still staring at your tits, his eyes dragging up to your face a few seconds too late, “I’m guessin’ we should of talked through this first but I just wanted to make you feel good—”
“You think I feel obligated?” Your eyebrow raises up slightly before you’re pulling his boxer down just enough that his cock springs out, bobbing away from his stomach slightly and you only allow yourself half a second to react.
He’s big, from root to tip you know it is the biggest you’ve ever had and you’re waiting for the cocky remark, the begging for compliments and thoughts that you hear so often during these halfway thought out hook-ups but this wasn’t that. It was weeks of build up, the tension line snapping under the weight of your unspoken desire for each other.
“Joel—”
“Don’t go boostin’ my ego,” He chuckles, “—not you, baby.”
You laugh softly and dip your head, feeling his hand curve over and through your hair, down your neck before it settles against the middle of your back and he brushes the stray hair from your face, allows his finger to rest behind your ear as you tilt your head and lick a long stripe up his cock, flicking your eyes up briefly to catch him staring, mouth closed and unnaturally stoic for a moment, like he’s holding his breath.
“Show me,” You plead with him, “whaddya like?”
You move down slightly to roll your tongue along his balls, the weight of it in your mouth as you suckle and feel his fingertips scrape gently along your skin, allowing a few moments of your own exploration before he’s wrapping his hand around his shaft and using the other to grip your chin and rubbing the tip against your half-open mouth, forcing a dribble of spit between your lips and letting it trail down the tip before he feeds his cock into your mouth, tongue spreading flat over the underside and keeping him in your eye-line before it’s nearly impossible, feeling him guide you down until his cock nudges the back of your throat with a slight sting, eyes watering.
“Look at that,” His voice is low, gruff as it rumbles in his chest, “makin’ it all fit in that pretty little moutha’ yours.”
You quickly realize that Joel enjoys watching you feel consumed by him, choking on his cock as your head bobs up and down with fervor, a gentle guiding hand against the back of your head as you breathe through your nose, feeling him nudge the back of your throat over and over and over until you find yourself fighting for air and oblivious to the symphony of curses Joel was spewing above you as his neck was tight, straining as he tipped his own head back against the chair.
And he looks too fucking good to pass up on. You rise, pulling at the collar of his shirt to grab his attention and his eyes open wide, his pupils blown out and dilated as he watches you move, biting at your bottom lip as you shuffled your legs over his hips to straddle him.
“Can you fuck me?”
“Can I—sweetheart, you sure?”
You give him a look of flippant disregard, too impatient to pace through the steps of sureness. But, Joel is focused suddenly, pulling your attention to him as his palm finds your face, cradling your cheek and rubbing his thumb over the shape of your lips.
“Don’t give me that look,” He tells you.
“Yes, Joel.” You answer him impatiently, “I just—I mean I don’t have anything, but…”
“You ain’t gotta worry about that,” Joel chuckles, “been out of commission for a while, sugar.”
You can’t help to release the giggle that bubbles in your chest at that.
He’d had kids, a family at some point—but that wasn’t his life now. He was a renewed bachelor, experiencing all the things he’d put on the back-burner to be a good and proper father. While this hadn’t been at the top of his list, or even anywhere on it really, you can see the happy satisfaction on his face with how comfortable he’s grown in the time you’ve gotten to know one another.
“Can’t tell,” You comment slyly as you lift up on your knees, allowing Joel to shift his jeans further down until they’re bunched sloppily at his ankles.
Joel rolls his eyes fondly, “Go on, baby.”
He watches, eyes following your hand as you grip his cock at the base, rubbing it along the center of your cunt, gliding through messy arousal and finding some excitement in the way he squeezes at your thighs a little too hard, fingers curling around the back of your knee as the head of his cock catches against your clit, again, again, barely allowing him to press inside of you until finally, a few harsh pleas balancing on his tongue that quickly dissipate as you sink down onto him inch by suffocating inch.
You breathe out slowly, watching Joel as he watches you, his eyes locked on the sight of his cock as it settles inside of you, only allowing the slow, gentle rock of your hips as you adjust.
His stomach flexes under your touch, fisting your hands into his shirt and lifting it out of the way before Joel gets the hint and strips himself completely, kicking his jeans off weakly as you sigh, squeezing gently as his shoulders and feeling his hands grip at your backside, into the soft flesh of your cheeks and you strip the wrinkled fabric over your head, tossing it somewhere behind Joel’s head as you fingers grip along the edge the bar of the chair above his head, lifting your hips in time with his movements as he keeps a firm hand on you, allowing soft puffs of groans to fall from his lips as your tits bounce with the frantic movement and Joel leans forward, capturing the side of your breast between his teeth, a gentle bite that causes you to squeak.
It’s quickly soothed by his tongue before he flicks it over your nipple, circling the peaked and pebbled nub before he’s sucking it between his teeth, eyes locking on yours from the depraved angle it allows you, still able to spot the few shining grays of his hair in this light. You card your fingers through his hair and arch your chest into his mouth, “J-Joel, maybe we should move this inside.”
He shakes his head, mouth still stuffed full with you as you moan out loudly when he smacks your ass in one gentle but solid swing and you want to blame his boldness on the dwindling drug in your system, but somehow you come to the conclusion that it was just Joel, unbridled and wanting. Of you.
“Not a chance in hell, sweetheart,” Joel disagrees as he pulls back, “no one gives a damn ‘round here, anyways.”
“Says you,” You laugh weakly, whimpering softly as he snaps his hips into you with sudden force, his hand reaching for the back of your neck to urge you forward, forgoing your body for your lips and it’s more intense than anything else going on around you—his cock stuffed inside of you, the fingers on your skin, it didn’t matter for that brief second of a first touch, kissing you sloppily as you moan into each other’s shared space.
“Well, I do—got this one neighbor,” He jokes, “nosey as shit but damn is she a good fuckin’ time.”
You gasp as he pulls you close, free arm wrapping around your back as he slips his tongue past your lips, using the opportunity as your lips part to devour you in an instant and you pull at the stands of his hair in turn, kissing him back with a harsh pressure that begs for more.
“M’not nosey,” You defend lamely, “just—fuck, curious, ya know?”
“Thank god for that,” Joel sighs, and your pussy flutters before squeezing around him, “oh, fuck baby—do that... do that again.”
You do, teasingly, watching as Joel curses under his breath and leans back, watching you move against him without shame, a hand pressing against your stomach to guide you to lean back slightly, “Look at that, sweetheart—makin’ a goddamn mess on me.”
The short, coarse hair at his groin is wet and sure enough, covered in the messy slick of you and mixed with the thin sheen of sweat that had covered both of your bodies in this sticky heat.
“You like the idea of gettin’ high and letting me fuck you?” Joel questions amongst the pound of your heart in your ears, the heat of his gaze quickly driving you toward the edge again. He chuckles, “Dirty—dirty girl. Was that what you’ve been plannin’ since the beginning?”
“Would’ve let you fuck me either way,” You admit, only a half-truth. You weren’t sure if you’d ever pluck up the courage had Joel not made the first move, but you’re damn sure glad he did anyways, “and with a cock like that, god—”
“Easy,” Joel warns, “givin’ me a complex the way you were looking at it.”
“It’s big, Joel.” You admit, pushing the stray hair that had fallen down over his forehead away and back into this messily quaffed hair, “You like knowing I can barely fit it all in my mouth, don’t—don’t act coy about it.”
He’s not—he’d been more than willing to allow you to choke on the girth of him until you begged for mercy, but given his normally gentle nature with you, he wasn’t going to take it that far.
Your brow drags up in a pinch, moaning as his thumb presses against your clit and circles, presses down gently, just the right amount of everything to drive you to near insanity. Your thighs squeeze against his own where he has you spread out, hands balled up into fists that punch gently at his chest.
“You’re right there, baby—gotcha, I gotcha.” He murmurs, watching you intently as you grip at the arm wrapped around your back to keep you upright, fingers digging into his bicep as you tip over the edge, legs shaking through the second orgasm he’s given you that night, squeezing your eyes shut so hard you start to see the flurry of stars in your darkened vision.
Your limbs give out shortly after, falling against his chest as he snaps his hips, just near the edge himself as he groans, grunts, breathing hotly into the curve of your neck and you rub at the little spot behind his ear that makes him chuckle, “Want it all inside,” You tell him through a cloud haze of need and pure desire, “can you do that, Joel?”
“Fill you up, sugar?” He asks, sounding a little taken aback, “If that’s—if that’s somethin’ you’re comfortable with.”
You nod eagerly and he loosens the reins completely, lifting one of your legs until you can plant a foot near his hip and he pounds into you, pulling back when he feels the impending orgasm grow in his gut, hot and intense. He watches as he comes inside of you with a few slow snaps of his hips.
“Shit,” He curses after a drawn-out silence, helping you move off of him and into a more comfortable position between his legs as he grabs lazily for his shirt, cleaning up the mess of your wet arousal against his skin and letting the spoiled shirt rest over his groin for modesty, breathing in slow, full breaths.
It’s been too long for him and he knows it.
Joel reaches for the dress that caught on the edge of the chair by his head and hands it over, watching as you slipped it over your head, legs still spread out over his own and he can’t help but draw his eyes to the sight of his come dripping out between your legs and he grins subtly, motioning you forward with a tired finger that you look at curiously before scooting forward an inch, thinking he may wipe something of your face, arrange a piece of hair back into place, but instead he’s slipping his ring finger inside of you and it forces a surprised gasp from your chest.
You laugh airily and swat his hand away, “Stop that,” You tell him.
“Just makin’ sure you don’t waste any of it, sweetheart.”
You snort, flipping him off half-heartedly as you reach for your underwear, standing up to pull it back up your hips and under your dress, swaying slightly on your feet after having been sat for so long.
You sigh, pushing your hair back with your hands, suddenly feeling sticky and gross in the aftermath and Joel seems to notice, slowly redressing himself as he stands.
“Why don’t you shower?” Joel suggests, leaving his jeans unbutton but pulled back up his hips. Shirt balled up in his hand.
You look geared to say no, but Joel sweetens the deal.
He looks at his watch, nearing two in the morning.
“I’ll make us an early breakfast,” He offers, shrugging with a lazy smile, “I mean—early early, because I know you’re probably starvin’. I know I am.”
“Only if you’ll make the blueberry pancakes.”
Of course that was the ultimatum.
“Deal, sugar—go get your ass in the shower.” He nods toward the house and you laugh, running away from the hand that pushes at your back.
So, maybe Joel wasn’t the scary neighbor you assumed him to be. But, you couldn’t deny the bursting affection that was growing in your chest for him and that was even more terrifying.
And when he serves up the pancakes to you, hair damp and dripping down your back and onto the shirt he’d lent you, a small square of pancake balanced on a fork that he feeds into your mouth, you feel it.
He's still shirtless, barefoot against his kitchen floor.
“We can—we can do this again, right?”
Joel smiles, looking down at the plate as he cuts off another piece.
“I’ve been waitin’ an entire summer to get the courage to do that, or even ask you on a proper date—we can do whatever you want, sugar.”
“Dates are overrated,” You shrug, “I like this better.”
“Good,” Joel grins, “least now I can mow that lawn of yours without feelin’ bad for asking.”
“Excuse you—I do just fine on my own,” You gasp with mock offense.
You’re lying—that mower was a piece of shit and Joel could see the way your face quickly melts into embarrassment, laughing quietly behind his fist.
“I like helpin’ out,” He tells you with a shrug, beginning to list off a few things he could help work on around your house, eyes drifting off as he went through the mental list, oblivious to the sudden closeness as you leaned over the counter and capture his lips, closed mouth with both of your cheeks puffed full of pancakes.
“You ramble when you’re high,” You tease him, “it’s adorable.”
Joel grimaces at the word but relents when he sees you smile, wide and spreading out across your entire face, snatching the fork from his hand while he’s distracted.
“So, same time next week?”
“Deal, sweetheart.”
Joel doesn’t care that you show up empty-handed the following week.
And frankly, neither do you.
divider creds: @saradika-graphics
#joel miller#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller x y/n#joel miller smut#the last of us#the last of us fanfiction#tlou fanfiction#pedro pasca#pedro pascal characters#my writing#um i have no reason other than pure horknee-ness
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Headcanon: Eddie is a boob man. Best friend Eddie would one day notice your boobs (maybe in a bathing suit or a low cut top or something) and they become his new obsession hehe
Us? Projecting? Never.
Warnings: smut (18+ only, minors DNI), unwanted boners, semi-public masturbation (m), Eddie's a perv but he's not thrilled about it, Reader has boobs but no size is given (Eddie loves all boobs, let's be real)
WC: 1.3k
Divider credit to @saradika
Stupid D20.
Stupid Dustin for tossing it so far across the table.
Stupid low-cut shirt that exposes your chest when you lean over to collect the die, giving Eddie a stupid boner in the middle of Hellfire Club.
“Hey, Ed!” Gareth calls out impatiently, snapping his fingers in front of the Dungeon Master’s face. “You wanna tell us if we defeated the demogorgon, or are you just gonna stare off into space?”
Eddie clears his throat. “Sorry. Right.” He tries his best to proceed with the campaign as usual, but all he can think about are your boobs and how grateful he is to be sitting down right now.
When he adjourns the meeting, he’s still too hard to stand without someone noticing. “I’m just gonna, uh, hang back and brainstorm for a few,” he lies as smoothly as he can.
“Can’t wait to see what sadistic shit you come up with,” Mike says. The rest of the guys slap him five in agreement as they clamor out the door.
The only people left in the room are you and Eddie.
Of course.
“You don’t have to stick around, Sweetheart.” He tries not to sound too dismissive, plastering a smile on his face.
“You’re my ride.”
Shit. “Oh. Right.” He hedges a nervous laugh. “I’ll be ready in five.”
You nod. “No worries. I’ll run to the girls’ room while I wait.” Before reaching the door, you notice that Lucas’s character sheet has fluttered to the ground. You reach down and scoop it up, revealing the tops of your bra-covered breasts.
“Sinclair owes me,” you chirp, placing the paper back on the table, remaining utterly oblivious to the way Eddie is straining against his zipper once again.
To Eddie’s credit, he tries to stop thinking about them. He really, truly does.
You’re his best friend. He doesn’t want to constantly think about your boobs, or the way they’d feel pressed against his bare chest, or whether your nipples would harden if he sucked on them, or—
“Mr. Munson!” Ms. O’Donnell’s shrill screech snaps him out of his breast-induced stupor. “Is there a reason why you can’t be bothered to listen while I’m trying to teach?”
“N-No, ma’am.”
She huffs out an irritated sigh. “Since you must know everything already, why don’t you come up and solve the problem for us?” She taps the piece of chalk against the blackboard, leaving tiny white dots in its wake.
Eddie shakes his head, feeling his cheeks burn red. Humiliating himself when he can’t figure out the value of x will be bad enough, but to fail while his sail is at half-mast? He’ll never recover.
Fortunately, the old bird relents and turns back to the board to continue her lesson.
Crisis averted.
Except…is it?
Because the only thing—things, rather—on Eddie’s mind are your tits. And he isn’t supposed to be imagining himself caressing them while you’re bouncing on his cock, moaning his name, saying that only he can make you feel that good…
He’s racing out of his seat the moment the bell rings, making a mad dash for the Hellfire room, relieved to see that it’s unoccupied. The door barely closes behind him before he’s ambling towards his DM throne and frantically tugging down his jeans and boxers.
“Fucking Christ,” he whispers, inhaling sharply as his cock is free of its denim restraint. He wraps his hand around it and squeezes in his desperation for an ounce of relief. Pre-cum already leaks from his red, angry tip, and he knows from experience that this is not going away without some…intervention.
Eddie reluctantly lets go of himself and spits into his open palm. He bites his lower lip to stifle a burgeoning moan as he slowly works his shaft, fingers tightening to simulate what he imagines to be the way you’d feel.
“Thassit, mmmf, feels s’good.” He closes his eyes and rests the back of his head on his chair. He needs you underneath him so he can watch your breasts jiggle with each snap of his hips.
“Bet you want my cum, huh? Where do you want it?” Eddie keeps his voice low, barely loud enough for him to hear. “Want it on those pretty tits of yours? Yeah, you fuckin’ do.”
His fist flies over his hardness, choked whimpers escaping his lips. He feels pleasure begin to build and moans your name to bring himself over the edge.
“Yeah?”
Eddie’s head snaps forward, taking a moment to let reality seep in. He’s not buried deep within you; he’s jerking off in a dark room where he plays Dungeons & Dragons, and you’re standing in the doorway.
“Eds? You okay?”
“Hmm? Oh, yeah. ‘M fine,” he lies, silently brainstorming ways to tuck himself back into his pants without you noticing.
You arch a disbelieving brow. “You sure? Lucas said he saw you running down the hallway—”
“I’m fine!” He insists louder this time. Shaking his head, he bites his lip and attempts to collect himself.
The two of you have been friends for too long; you know that he’s far from fine when he raises his voice. You walk to him, determined to figure out what’s wrong.
And then you see it.
Eddie says nothing, fully focused on covering himself as best he can and avoiding eye contact.
It doesn’t take long for you to put the pieces together: semi-hard cock in his hand, sweat beading on his forehead, the pleading mentions of your name.
“Eddie.” You let your fingertips brush against his shoulder. “Did I interrupt?”
He only nods in response.
“What were you thinking about?”
Eddie exhales a long breath before answering. “You,” he finally answers. “And th-that shirt you wore yesterday.” His cock twitches at the mere reminder of it.
You grin knowingly. You’d bought it at the mall specifically because of its low-cut neckline, hoping it would catch Eddie’s attention.
Apparently, it very much had.
“You liked it?”
“Loved it.” He starts stroking himself again, almost unaware of his own movements. “Want you to wear it every damn day,” he adds with a hoarse chuckle.
Swiping your tongue over your lower lip, you lean in and whisper in his ear, “What if I didn’t wear one at all?”
With that, you lift your shirt over your head and unhook your bra, letting them both fall to the ground unceremoniously. Eddie’s eyes widen, gazing at your exposed chest.
“Oh, baby,” he breathes, his free hand reaching out to touch them. His thumb grazes one nipple and he gives your breast a gentle squeeze. “Baby, they’re perfect.”
You smile, using your hip to nudge the table away and get on your knees in front of him. “Keep going, Eds.”
He nods again, shifting forward a bit so you’re between his legs. “Gonna…gonna cum all over these perfect tits,” he grunts. “Please. Please, I gotta…”
“You can cum on them, Eds.”
And, fuck, does he. Thick ropes spill out of his cock, painting your chest in a sticky film. He’s crying out your name as he does it, milking every last drop.
He floats down from the high, staring at your chest and admiring the way he’s claimed you. “That…wow,” he manages, laughing nervously. “Let me clean you up.” He reaches for the tissues, wiping whatever is still leaking out of him before sopping up the mess on your breasts.
“I don’t know where we go from here,” he admits sheepishly, wadding up the Kleenex and tossing it into the trash. “Like, do I take you on a date? Bend you over the table?” He says the second option teasingly, but you have a feeling he wouldn’t turn you down if you agreed to it.
You re-clasp your bra and shrug on your shirt. “We could try a date,” you say as casually as you can.
“Dinner and a movie?”
“I’ll wear that shirt.”
--
#eddie munson#eddie stranger things#eddie x reader#eddie x you#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x f!reader#eddie munson x you#eddie munson smut#eddie munson angst#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fanfic#stranger things fanfic#fanfic#eddie munson stranger things#stranger things#smut#requests
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HELLFIRE
18+ / mdi
summary: whenever he was at a crossroads, seokmin always knew he could turn to god. however, with the recent thoughts you've been putting in his head, he's not sure god will show him the answer this time around.
content: virgin!seokmin, catholic!seokmin, religious repression, old fashioned and exaggerated catholic beliefs, very brief mention of homophobia, very conservative beliefs, a lowkey cult-ish view of catolicism oops, seokmin is veryyy socially awkward and not used to socialization outside of religion, his parents are super overbearing, lots of family tensions, seokmin has an estranged brother (jeonghan), conflicting emotions about god, sexual repression, reader is an atheist, afab reader, smut, dry humping, oral (m and f receiving), handjob, penetrative sex, loss of virginity, etc.
wc: 13k
a/n: she's here!! i didnt write an outline for this and i kinda only focused on seokmin's pov for this which makes reader kinda look like she's trying to corrupt him for no reason lol but i promise its still fluffy and cute <3
masterlist | kofi/patreon
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Normalcy for Seokmin had always equated to the church. It was what he'd known since childhood and what he grew up surrounded by up until his current age.
His upbringing had been good by all accounts. Although he had an estranged brother who he didn't get to see too often, he had a father and a mother who cherished him like no one else. His financial means were also to be envied, as he was raised in a wealthy part of town and had always been surrounded by an upper class community – a heavily religious community.
This community was one that Seokmin always respected and cherished. Being brought up going from one private catholic school onto the next as he aged, Seokmin never knew anything other than the constant supervision of nuns and religious figures who would constantly guide him in the right direction (at least according to the bible). While others may think this lifestyle to be restricting, Seokmin knew it to be the proper path for a young man to follow. He never complained about the bi-weekly mass he had to attend with his parents, nor about the separation by gender that was mandated by his school. Seokmin knew all his prayers by heart and was sure of what his role in society must be. In short, Seokmin knew and did all things proper and by the letter.
As a young man (at the ripe age of 20), Seokmin finally found himself in a society that was not of catholic background. After transferring from a two year college in town (one centered around catholic studies, of course), Seokmin was now readying himself to move away from home in order to finalize his education in a fully co-ed institution for the following two years.
It wasn't like Seokmin had never interacted with people outside of the church (or with women in general). He was simply a bit on the shier side when it came to non-religious endeavors and usually only stuck by his religious community, which often abided by old-fashioned rules found in the bible. For instance, Seokmin had been so dedicated to the church that he would usually spend his free time volunteering at the church's food drive or performing with his church group at various family-friendly events around town. This meant that Seokmin's inner circle always consisted of people who had an almost identical ideology as that of his own.
Seokmin felt bad at admitting this (which was why he never vocalized these thoughts), but he could sometimes get a bit tired of the consistency of his life. It was a constant repetition of events surrounded by the same exact people time and time again. He never had any opportunity to be challenged or observe outside opinions, specially not with the constant supervision his community gave youth like him (something about wanting him to follow the right path unlike his older brother). Seokmin knew and trusted his beliefs, so he felt a bit infantilized whenever his own family would become overbearing while ensuring Seokmin didn't go off the rails like his brother had – his brother, who was still a quite a sore subject for him.
And now, Seokmin felt excitement. Knowing he would finally be able to explore the outside world and experience the last couple of years of his college life not under the watchful eye of his church. However, as a strong believer himself, Seokmin had still ensured he would have time to attend mass every week and maybe join a religious club on campus. Although he sometimes felt scrutinized by his family and community, Seokmin had never once faked his belief in God. I mean, it was all he had known thus far and all he felt he could really count on no matter what.
When the day to move into his dorms finally arrived, Seokmin had a difficult time hiding his excitement. His community had thrown him a goodbye party, allowing him to be the main focus of the night as one by one, every adult figure in his life bid their farewells accompanied by thinly veiled warnings to not fall into the bad habits sometimes found in non-religious communities. Seokmin was pure-minded at heart, so he took these warnings with a warm and heartfelt gratitude, knowing that despite his desire to expand his horizons, it was important he kept his beliefs safe.
Thanks to his parents, Seokmin had the fortune of being able to rent a room away from the dorms. His parents had insisted, claiming that dorm life could get quite rowdy and that a roommate who had not been pre-approved by them may give him a bad influence and lead him towards an unholy path. Seokmin, already slightly nervous about heading into the world on his own, agreed in order to give himself a safe space of solitude in case he needed it.
The apartment was pretty close to the dorms themselves, allowing Seokmin a calm commute in his bike every day for his classes. Thus far, he had been in the city for a week, still having a few days before school actually began. He had attended his church club already, meeting all the other members and scouting out who he may be able to befriend in the near future. Everyone seemed pretty much like the preppy rich kids he had grown up with all throughout his years of catholic school. There was a bit more of variety among the people in the club than back home, with the club allowing for co-ed inclusion of members (something which was quite common in church groups, though Seokmin had grown too accustomed by his non co-ed upbringing). They also seemed to come from different backgrounds, but ultimately Seokmin could tell that just like him, they were very likely brought up in a very coddled and comfortable way. This was how your presence in the club first stood out to him.
While everyone seemed very put together and happy to be there, you caught Seokmin's attention right away. Your visible discomfort was the first thing Seokmin noticed. Though you looked as nice and welcoming as anyone else, Seokmin could see that you seemed like a closed book. Your eyes did not light up the same as the rest of the members, nor did you actively participate in the icebreaker activities set up by the club. Seokmin also caught onto the fact that the other members already knew each other (likely from previous years at the college), while they treated you like a black sheep. And of course, Seokmin couldn't help but notice your appearance, which made it difficult for him to look away from you.
Of course, Seokmin had had female friends in the past. It's not like his church separated the pews by gender or anything like that. Seokmin was just slightly reserved. With his constant attendance at institutions that insisted upon gender separation at all times and very overbearing parents, Seokmin never really had the chance to form any type of relationship with any girl throughout his youth. He had teamed up with other female volunteers while working at charities and had even been in charge of showing new girls in the community around the church's premises. However, these were very isolated instances.
As of the past twenty years, Seokmin was yet to ever really think about women liberally. He was always taught that time for those things would come eventually, whatever that meant. It was something that had been repeated to him by both his parents, neighbors, the reverend, and even at some point by his brother (though his brother had said it in a sarcastic tone, which confused Seokmin even further).
And now here he was, sitting quietly across the room from you as he watched you in silence, barely paying attention to whichever new activity the group leaders were discussing for the first charity event they'd hold during the upcoming semester.
You were pretty. Seokmin could tell that much. His mind did not process anything other than your features for almost the entirety of the meeting, being far too occupied by analyzing every inch of your person as he unknowingly held his breath.
His eyes on you did not seem to catch your attention at any point, but they did catch the attention of a fellow member of the group who was sitting near him.
"You know her?", asked the nameless member.
"Oh, uh, what? No, I was just– "
"She's not really a member here, you know. Just kind of an honorary one, I guess."
"What do you mean?", he finally took his eyes off you due to his sudden interest in the conversation.
"Her parents pay for her tuition as long as she can prove she's an active member of the local catholic community. Apparently she just pretends for them, but her parents still somehow bought her way into the club", the guy lowered his voice to a whisper, "I heard she's an atheist, man. We just have to kinda ignore she's there."
Though Seokmin knew that his parents' immediate reaction to such gossip would be shock at the blatant disrespect you were showing towards your parents who clearly just wanted you to not stray away from the path of God, Seokmin was more annoyed at the guy who found it so easy to talk about you behind your back completely unprompted.
While Seokmin couldn't understand why someone would claim themselves atheist when it was so clear to him how life had been created, he still saw it wrong to judge someone for their beliefs. It was oftentimes that churchgoers back home would exhibit malicious intentions such as what he'd just witnessed from his fellow group member. You were clearly not bothering anyone and even looked pretty aware of the alienation the members were putting you through, so Seokmin couldn't help but feel sad for you.
He shyly shrugged off the guy who had made him privy to your information and went back to staring at you as you sat back and seemingly waited for the bi-weekly meeting to end.
Despite catching his curiosity that day, Seokmin did not end up having any contact with you, being way too shy to even hold eye contact with you as the meeting ended.
Days passed and Seokmin finally started school. He had to admit, he felt completely out of his league. Thanks to his parents, he was never properly socialized as a child. While most members of the church would have active social lives outside of their ministry (even going to public schools and participating in non-catholic leisure activities), Seokmin had always been confined into a box that only allowed him to interact with other heavily religious people. This was never a problem to Seokmin, who was happy to dedicate his life to the lord. Except now it was proving troublesome.
Since professors had a tendency to get liberal during discussions at times, he felt scandalized by many of the subjects spoken about during class. He also felt awkward interacting with other people his age, who would share very different beliefs from his own. Seokmin had even attempted to dabble into social media at some point now that he was not under his parent's' watchful eye, but even that had him feeling unseemly.
Overall, Seokmin felt embarrassed at how little life experience he had due to having dedicated his entire life thus far to serving both God and his parents. He was beginning to understand why his brother Jeonghan had left home as soon as he turned of age. He had always judged him for it, but his judgment was beginning to fade away.
Now that he no longer had his parents nor community around (much less his brother), the only comfort he could turn to was that of his nightly prayers.
His struggles continued for the following weeks, with Seokmin becoming a bit of an outcast in most social situations. He was quite outgoing in the church, but this was a completely different environment in which he felt ridiculous every time he tried to interact with people who had had far more social advantages and freedom than he did growing up.
Keeping a low profile had been easy to achieve for Seokmin. He decided after a few very awkward interactions that he would simply become an outcast and stick to himself, only ever interacting with his church club the few times a week they'd meet (though unfortunately never having the courage to interact with you). This seemed to work up until the second week of school, in which Seokmin's women's studies teacher informed the class they'd be doing a partner project for the entirety of the semester.
Seokmin had taken the class against his parents' wishes, feeding them with a white lie that it was part of the necessary curriculum in order to graduate. He argued to himself that this was a subject he would never be exposed to in his community, knowing his community to be slightly ... old-fashioned. This part of his life always made him embarrassed, – not really sharing many of the beliefs his community had tried to drill into him – so he wanted to atone for his lack of knowledge now that he was in a completely independent environment.
Teaming up with someone back home was always easy, as he was quite popular both in church and at school. Here, however, he had already given himself the reputation of awkward and overly dedicated to God – he had stated his devotion to God during the individual introductions they'd done on week 1, leading to low chuckles and uncomfortable looks from his classmates – which was something that the general population did not seem to like. He was avoided by his fellow women's studies classmates since then.
Sure, Seokmin did share a few old-fashioned catholic beliefs such as the necessity devotion to God and the importance of one's purity being kept until marriage, but he did not agree with any other bigoted beliefs shared by many catholic communities. He had genuinely taken this class with the hope to learn and expand his horizons, but most people in it had already decided that he must be a close-minded weirdo.
By some struck of luck, as Seokmin sat back, completely defeated while he watched other people stand up and enthusiastically find a partner, he suddenly heard someone clear their throat to call his attention.
It was you.
He hadn't realized you were taking this class too due to the high mass of students (about 100, give or take). And now he found himself looking up at you from his seat as you gave him what seemed to him like a confident grin.
"Hi, Seokmin," you sat next to him without so much as asking.
Your sitting position was troublesome for Seokmin, as he noticed the way in which your short skirt rid up as you crossed your legs and leaned towards him. You were wearing more revealing clothing today than any other time in which he'd seen you at the bi-weekly meetings. Your attire wasn't provocative by any means, it was just that you were always more covered up at the meetings. Seokmin assumed it might've been due to some scrutiny you may have faced by the members. This made him frown internally.
"Oh ... hi. Y-you know my name?", he sat up from his slouched position and faced his body towards yours, though he was too shy to meet your eyes for too long.
"Of course I do, Seokmin. We're in a church group together, remember?"
You carried a very confident and laid back air to you despite having only spoken to him for the first time just now. You also seemed much livelier than back at the confined room where his fellow church group members gathered. This was likely due to the lack of scrutiny you usually received completely unwarranted while at his church group's meetings.
"Ah, yeah, just, uh, didn't realize you noticed me."
"C'mon, Seokmin. You're the only person in there who doesn't look at me like I killed their dog. Of course I'd notice you."
He wasn't sure how to respond, but that at least answered the question as to whether or not you were aware of the gossip a few of the other members had let him in on.
"I'm sure that's not true ... I– "
"It's fine, really. Anyways, I just wanted to ask you if you'd like to partner up?", you suggested, completely unfazed by the mention of your judgmental group mates.
"O-oh. You want to? I mean, yeah! Of course," he couldn't help but feel relieved at the prospect of not having to meet with the professor after class to let her know he'd need her assistance finding a partner.
"Great. Here, put your number in my phone and I'll let you know when I can stop by your place so we can brainstorm," you handed him your phone as if nothing; as if you weren't suggesting going over alone to his apartment unsupervised.
He hesitated but gave you his number, flinching a bit when your hands accidentally touched.
"Thanks. I was thinking this Friday. Is that okay with you?"
"Oh, y-yeah. Sure," he mustered a toothy smile for you.
You giggled under your breath, "Okay, Seokmin. Looking forward to seeing you," there was a permanent smile in your eyes as you spoke to him, making him a bit giddy.
He bid his goodbyes back and finally let out a puff of air when you parted ways.
The rest of the class period was completely wasted to Seokmin. His mind was too giddy and preoccupied with thoughts of seeing you again, this time in a more intimate setting. The thought made him anxious, though he also felt some weird tingling he wasn't fully sure how to describe.
Did this mean you had noticed him too? Had he stood out to you in this huge hall? The thought made him shudder before regaining control of himself and starting to anxiously doodle on his notebook.
He snuck a glance over at the direction in which you left, now localizing your seat. You were talking to a few friends, which confused Seokmin greatly. This meant that you already had friends in this class, so why would you go out of your way to team up with him? Was his curiosity about you maybe mutual? This question would surely be all Seokmin thought about for the next two days until the two of you finally met up to discuss your project.
Seokmin saw you again the following day at second bi-weekly meeting of the week.
Once more, you sat back and said nothing, only bothering to sign your name on the attendance board at the start of the meeting and taking your usual seat away from everyone else.
Your attire was different from what you had been wearing in your women's studies class just a few hours ago. You had donned a long skirt and a long sleeve too instead of the tiny shorts he had seen you wearing previously. This change in attire made no difference to Seokmin, however, since he already knew what your bare legs looked like and could not prevent himself in picturing them as he stared.
Your presence had yet again proved to be incredibly distracting to Seokmin, who had already been thinking about you ever since you had suggested to meet at his place.
There was no one he could ask for advice about what to wear or what to do. His friends back home would frown at the thought of Seokmin even considering an unchaperoned gathering with a girl – especially an self-declared atheist who was simply pretending to be catholic for her parents.
His parents were also not a good option. Seokmin could just picture the gasp in surprise at the revelation that his women's studies class (one which his parents had called 'useless' and 'made up') had enticed him into bringing a girl home while no one else was around. He cringed at the mere thought of them attempting to intercept the situation by barging in and lecturing both you and him on proper relations between man and woman.
Seokmin knew he was overthinking all of this, but he had an internal conflict. On one side, he knew that this was just a regular meeting between classmates to discuss a project, but this was his first time alone with a girl (one he had a bit of a crush on, at that!) On the other side, Seokmin couldn't help but feel like he was breaking his parents' trust. They had explicitly forbid him from ever engaging in any type of relationship with any girl unless she was pre-approved by them (something which they'd already tried and failed at doing with Jeonghan). And on a secret third side of things, Seokmin felt like now that he was alone and untrained on what life was like in the real world, it'd be easy for him to fall susceptible to desire and betray God's word. He hadn't had any unbecoming feelings thus far, but his crush on you was enough for this fear to be instilled in him.
For now, Seokmin had the rest of his school day to worry about, so he pushed these thoughts aside and tried to draw his eyes away from your figure as he attempted to pay attention to whichever biblical lesson the group's assigned leader read from.
This was yet another biblical lesson Seokmin had heard time and time again. Despite his strong devotion to God, Seokmin always felt a little belittled at the constant repetition of teachings he had been hearing since childhood. Were his personal beliefs and devotion to God not enough? Why did he need other people to give him their own ideas of religion when he himself was an expert at all of God's teachings by now?
He related to your current situation in this aspect. Even if he felt comfortable in his religious stance, he had to join this club in order to prove to his parents that he was an active participant in the local religious community. He had to constantly deal with his parents' paranoia that he may stray away from God in the way his brother had. His constant assurance that his relationship with God was too strong for breaking was not enough for them; they simply couldn't help showing up in every corner of his life even as far away as he currently was.
Seokmin sighed at these thoughts and drew them away as much as he could. His mind was already preoccupied with thoughts of you coming over tomorrow evening.
That night he went home and prayed his anxieties away, turning to the only being he could possibly trust with his grievances.
"Hi", you smiled brightly at Seokmin, hands holding onto the handles of your backpack as you stood in front of his open apartment door.
"H-hey."
He stepped aside to let you in, wincing internally as he noticed the short length of the white dress you were wearing. He could tell by now that your personal style was more revealing than what you chose to wear at religious gatherings. He couldn't blame you, but he wished you'd cover up more for his poor sanity.
"Do you wanna do it here or did you wanna do it in your bedroom?", you broke him out of his train of thought.
"H-huh ? D-do what? Oh, oh! Yeah. I mean, here is fine. Unless you want to do it in my bedroom? I mean, do the work in my bed– yeah!"
He physically winced at his stupid thoughts; the dumb paranoia that this was more than a platonic study date had gotten to him despite having prayed to calm his nerves just minutes before your arrival.
Luckily for him, all you did was giggle under your breath and take a seat on his couch before taking off your backpack and settling your stuff on his table.
Dumbly, he stood there just watching you, catching sight of your dress riding up yet again in the same way it had two days ago in class.
You patted the space on the couch next to you, telling him to come sit, that you 'didn't bite.' The best response he could muster to that was an awkward chuckle and a follow-up on your instruction.
He made sure to leave ample space between the two of you, even making sure to avoid eye contact as he also pulled out a few notes of his own.
Without saying anything, you scoot closer to him, even turning to face him further, though still facing forward for the most part. Your knees were now bumping into his and your scent was near enough to invade his senses.
"Is this okay? Am I too close?", you asked when you noticed him stiffen.
"N-no. I'm sorry. I ... I'm being dumb. You're fine."
"Then how come you won't look this way?", you leaned even further towards him, making sure his eyes couldn't miss yours from his position.
He braved it and turned to face you, though his eyes were trained on your chin rather than your eyes. He now realized there was less distance between you than he thought.
"I'm sorry, I ..."
You interrupted him but grabbing his chin and gesturing him to look into your eyes.
"Do I make you nervous, Seokmin? You can look at me. You know that, right? It's not a sin to look into a girl's eyes", though your words sounded like mockery, your tone was as soft as your eyes.
He gulped and finally allowed himself to look at you. You were far too close now. Things had progressed too quickly, and in ways that Seokmin had thought were ridiculous to assume when he'd been going over the possibilities of your visit today. Yet here he was, eyes nervously staring into yours, trying their hardest to not lower to your lips or cleavage.
"You're exactly as I thought you would be," you started, hand moving from his chin to softly run your thumb on his cheek, "You're not like them. You're sweet ... But you're scared, aren't you?"
He didn't know where this was going, but your tone was soft and your words sweet so he nodded silently.
"It's okay to want things, Seokmin. Doesn't make you a bad person. You wanna please Him, though, don't you? Don't wanna disappoint Him?"
You were seeing right through him. It made him feel both understood but also like he was just as superficial as he thought the judgmental members of your church group to be.
"I just ..."
"It's okay, Seokmin. He'd want you to be happy. I ... I know it's meaningless hearing it from me, but He wouldn't want you to face this turmoil. You can give in. It's okay, I promise", your last words were said in the form of a whisper against his lips.
You were so close he could breathe you in, but his lips were unfortunately still not touching your own. This frustrated Seokmin, though it also relieved him. He felt way too heated to even engage in something as innocent as a kiss.
He knew that his first kiss would only lead to more. He had been so pent up all this years, shaming any desire away from his mind at every opportunity. He had never even pleasured himself, knowing it was frowned upon by God – at least that's the thought that was hammered into him since way too young an age.
He remembered the various conversations in which any thought of a relationship were verbally beaten out of him. He remembered the reaction of his parents when he had let it slip in kindergarten (his last year in a non-catholic institution) that he had a crush on the girl who'd been assigned as his new desk mate. He recalled the way his mom talked down on the four-year old girl, claiming her parents were not catholic and that she would be a bad influence on him. He remembered when his first phone was confiscated from him at fifteen when his father caught him watching the latest Twice music video at the time, claiming such things would lead him to impure thoughts. He remembered the last day he saw his brother two years ago right after a screaming match with his parents who had insulted and demeaned Jeonghan's partner, claiming he would burn in hell for his decisions against the lord's word.
With all these thoughts plaguing his mind, Seokmin let himself become numb to any spiritual consequences that would come from letting himself go. He found himself internally damning anything that wasn't your lips or the feeling of your hand on his cheek and sighed against you when you finally closed the gap.
Seokmin couldn't help himself in whining into your mouth when he felt your tongue tease his mouth open and begin intertwining with his own.
His arms were stiff against his sides and his lips far too shy and sloppy. It worried him that maybe he was not pleasing you in the way you did him, specially when you pulled away and spoke to him.
Your eyes were still on his lips and the distance between you remained small as you spoke up, "Follow my lead, okay Minnie? Let me show you .."
You kissed him again, this time slower and more sensual. It made his eyes roll back.
He took the hint and began moving his tongue in the same way yours did. He also shyly ran his hands up and down your back upon your wordless insistence that his arms wrap around your form. Following your instructions felt natural, though what you did next caught him completely off guard.
Your hands had snuck away from his cheek, with one now pulling at his hair (and making his eyes roll even further back in the process) and your other hand sneaking into his pants, touching him softly through his boxers.
He jumped back and accidentally disconnected your lips, gasping at the sudden intrusion.
"I ... I cant, I don't ..."
"It's okay if you don't want to, Minnie. I should've asked," you drew back a little, making Seokmin jump once again, but this time to make sure you stayed close.
"It's not that, I just ... I don't– "
"It's okay to want me. It's okay if you want this. We can stop if you want to, but ... you can want me ... You won't get in trouble, I promise."
Your lips were still close enough for him to reach, making him hesitantly grace them with his own. Thankfully you took the hint, giving him a wanton kiss that had him feeling dizzy.
He thoughtlessly kissed you back, whining any time you did something he particularly liked. You didn't attempt touching under his pants again, now simply sticking to running your hands up and down his clothed chest while his shyly caressed your back.
The kiss got heated pretty quickly, making him extremely light headed. He didn't know where this was going nor how he would feel afterwards, but he couldn't find it in himself to care.
His thoughts were interrupted when your lips left his own and trailed from his cheek to his ear, licking and nibbling at his lobe before whispering in it.
"Is this okay?"
"Y– yes. Please ..."
Your kisses against his neck had him throwing his head back. If he was mindless before, he was fully without a care now. Even if his community ever found out what he was up to during his first month away from home, he didn't care in this moment. His guilt may come later, but for now all he could do was enjoy your kiss.
"Can I play with you, Minnie?", you pulled away and gave him a sweet peck before asking.
"You ... It's wrong, I– He'll ..."
"He won't know, Minnie. It's okay. It'll feel so good."
You hesitantly snuck your hand under his trousers once more, slowly enough to allow him to deny you should he wish to. His sinful desire for you prevented him from moving, so you continued until your hand was wrapped around him.
"A– ah ... Y– you ... I've never ..." he sighed.
"Never touched yourself like this before?"
"'s not allowed, I ... I shouldn't ..."
"It's okay. I'm just taking care of you. Nothing wrong with taking care of your needs, right Minnie?"
He felt mocked by how ridiculous it sounded coming out of your mouth. But he still felt guilt. Guilt at every moan that left his mouth as you slowly rubbed up and down his length. Guilt at the way he wanted your lips back on his. Guilt at how difficult it was for him to drag his gaze away from your soft mounds peaking from your cleavage.
One thing was betraying everything his parents had always warned him about, but betraying God's word made him feel like he'd burn up until the day he faced his punishment.
Except he couldn't bring you to stop. He couldn't prevent himself in mindlessly nodding at you and asking you to please not stop.
Suddenly you grabbed his arm, directing it towards your chest. You must've noticed his heavy eyes eyeing your cleavage and realized what thoughts had been going through his perverted mind.
"Wanna touch them? It's okay, just ... just squeeze, yeah? That's it, fuck ... You're so pretty, Minnie," you sighed oh so prettily as soon as he followed your direction and experimentally squeezed at your clothed breasts.
He moaned and moaned at both your touch on him and his on yours. But he began to panic when he felt himself heating up more and more, feeling like he would soon reach a crescendo that he would never be able to fall back from.
"It's okay, Minnie. Let go. Let go for me, pretty. I'll take care of you," you must've sensed his panic and shut him up with your tongue in his mouth, swallowing his whines of pleasure as his end took over him.
He had never felt such pleasure before. Every touch you gave him was better than the last, making him wonder what other sinful acts with you would end up feeling like. He shuddered at the thought and went back to the blissful state his high was giving him.
You kept whispering soft praises to him, telling him that it was okay and that he could let go. He hadn't realized that he was crying until one of your hands softly wiped the tears from his cheeks and kissed softly at them. He felt more loved by your care than he ever had before. The seed of doubt was then planted into his head; why would such a loving an intimate act ever be seen as anything but holy?
He began to feel corrupted, but also conflicted on his thoughts on the matter. One thing he knew for sure, however; this would not be enough – he would seek you again and again.
After even more caring words from you, the two of you parted ways with no work done. You kissed him goodbye and told him you'd see him again soon. He responded shyly but you accepted it with yet another kiss and finally left his apartment.
That night Seokmin attempted to pray his conflicting thoughts away once more, but even then, Seokmin left mention of you out of his prayers, fearing that acknowledging your sudden and rapid effect on him would be the downfall of his purity and of the already strained relationship with his parents.
The following Monday, Seokmin saw you again at the first of the two bi-weekly meetings of your church group. As per usual, you sat alone on a corner while the rest of the club engaged in conversation with one another.
Seokmin chose to sit back once again, deciding to watch you from afar rather than participate in the conversation like he usually did, except this time you began to occasionally look back at him with a sweet smile. Your eye contact would cause him to look down with a blush, but after enough instances of catching your eye, he decided to shyly smile back at you. This proved to be fruitful, as you suddenly stood up and quietly walked your way over to him. Due to the conversation being led by the other group members, your new seat next to Seokmin went unnoticed, causing Seokmin's nerves to not flare up too much.
It was wordless but soft, the way in which you shared a seat with him and offered him yet another sweet smile. He felt giddy at having your attention in such a way. He was aware that he barely knew you, but having you become part of his life (in any way you may have wanted) made him feel a sense of pride he had never felt before.
The two of you spent the rest of the meeting giving each other shy smiles and playing tick tack toe on his notebook. When it was time to part ways, you finally spoke up and told Seokmin you needed to head back first, as your next class was far away. Seokmin wanted to offer to walk you, but was interrupted by another member of the group who called his attention – the same guy who had previously warned him about you. Due to the standoffish manner in which other group members behaved around you, you left awkwardly while Seokmin frowned and stayed back.
Slightly frustrated at not being able to bid you a proper goodbye (or walk with you as he had wished to offer), Seokmin's demeanor to his group mate was less polite than usual.
"What, are you two friends?", asked the member in a somewhat accusatory tone.
"I ... Yeah, maybe. Why?"
"I wouldn't advise that, Seokmin. She's a bad influence. I mean, you haven't been participating as much as when you first got here. It starts when you least expect it. Just don't want you to fall down a bad path."
"What bad path?"
"She was part of our faith at some point. Until she got corrupted, and now she just infiltrates our spaces like a nuance. She'll corrupt you in the same way if you're not careful. Take the advice, brother. Just don't get too close," and with that, he gave Seokmin a condescending nod and made his way out.
Since leaving home, Seokmin had forgotten how many churchgoers would cross boundaries without much care. How they would use the excuse of being 'sons and daughters' of God to be judgmental.
He saw no issue with your behavior. Maybe you had kissed Seokmin and maybe you had ... done other stuff to him. But you weren't a bad person for that. It wasn't like Seokmin stopped you (or even wanted to stop you). He wasn't sure why he felt so defensive over his groupmate's advice, but he couldn't help but be peeved off by this interaction for the rest of the day.
His mood stayed so sour towards his groupmate's harsh judgment of you that he had forgotten to do his nightly prayer before going to sleep, even forgetting to send a message with his blessings to his parents like he usually did.
The next morning he awoke to some overbearing messages from his parents inquiring why he had not messaged them the night prior. Seokmin was surprised at himself when his first reaction to their myriad of messages was to roll his eyes and lock his phone back up. He loved his parents, but his separation from them had quickly showed him how controlling they tended to be. But Seokmin realized it wasn't only them; it was the entirety of the puritanical and judgmental community he had grown up with.
Despite having only hung out with you once, you were already a breath of fresh air to Seokmin. You didn't judge him over his shy and socially awkward demeanor. He had a hunch that since you two belonged to the same church group and had likely had similar upbringings, you probably understood why he was the way that he was. Unlike everyone else he had met at this school so far (other than the other members of the church group), you weren't mean to him nor did you ever ignore him. You had seeked him out! The thought still gave him butterflies.
~
The two of you continued to casually hang out like this over the next week or so, though it usually tended to be only while on meetings with your church group or during your women's studies class.
Contrasting with your previous meeting, any time the two of you would hang out now mostly consisted of working on your project or getting to know each other. He had come to find out that you were here on a scholarship and that, as the nosy guy in your church group had stated, you were only attending the church group to appease your parents' belief that you should maintain some type of connection to God regardless of your beliefs in catholicism. You didn't get too much into it, but you also informed Seokmin that despite what the group members believed, you did not have a bad relationship with your parents due to your contrasting beliefs. This made Seokmin envious, pondering about how his parents would react should he ever find himself changing his faith.
Through the few times you saw each other in class, Seokmin grew to like you more and more. He knew now that he felt something for you that he had never before. He had a crush, for arguably one of the first times in his life. There were also more sinister feelings dwelling in his mind, however. Sometimes he would think back to that day alone in his apartment, when you took his innocence (though only partially). He wanted more, but he felt like he was simultaneously sinning and disrespecting you by even thinking about it. He still felt conflicted about last time, thinking himself a sinner and a bad son for disobeying both God and his parents, but he couldn't help himself in wanting more.
A few days later, Seokmin saw you yet again at your shared women's studies class.
Seokmin was completely unable to pay any attention to class today. Unfortunately for his sanity, you had recently begun to sit next to him every time the two of you shared this class. Seokmin had grown accustomed to sitting alone at the very back row of the auditorium in which your women's class was given. The first day he had sat next to a few people, but after mentioning his devotion to God during his personal introduction, he found people not only avoiding his eye and snickering at him but even going out of their way to sit away from him. You had been the sole exception, deciding to sit with him a few days after your meeting at his apartment, now smiling at him as you sat side by side.
Today, you have him more trouble than usual. You sent him flirtatious smiles during the entirety of class, even occasionally gracing your hand slowly on his leg. This had him shuddering and completely distracted, but he couldn't bring himself to stop you. You gave him a thrill he had never experienced before. While his mind before meeting you had always been dedicated to thinking of God and his duties as a member of the church, his mind was now fully occupied by you. As silly as it sounded, he had never felt the thrill of a crush before (specially not one that was reciprocated like this), and now he didn't know how to act.
"Hey, Minnie," you whispered to him as your professor lectured in the background.
"Y- yeah?"
"Wanna meet at my apartment after class today to study?", you now whispered right against his ear, finger drawing figures on his thigh.
"Oh, I– Of course," he coughed out.
You only giggled quietly in response and went back to paying attention to class (though still occasionally doodling cute hearts in Seokmin's notebook).
After class, the two of you walked together. Only a few minutes into your walk through campus, you slipped your hand into his. He was surprised by this, but allowed himself to squeeze yours back. His heart soared when you started swinging your intertwined hands back and forth.
Was this what romance felt like? The thought alone made Seokmin feel giddier than he had ever before. He relished in the simple act of holding your hand and felt pride any time you'd stop for a few seconds to say hi to some friends, never once letting go of his hand and even giving a quick introduction of his name.
You were quite literally heaven on Earth to Seokmin. He couldn't wait to get to know you even further.
~
Walking to your place took about half an hour, but it was worth it the moment the two of you stepped in and you immediately pushed Seokmin against the wall, stealing a kiss from him.
"Minnie ... Been thinking about you since last time ..." you kissed at his neck, pulling his collared neckline out of the way.
"Me too ..."
"Yeah? What'd you think about?", you paused to pull back and look at him, "You don't regret it, do you? Was I too much?", your tone was genuine, more genuine than he had ever heard anyone direct themselves to him.
"N-no, of course not. I've, uh, I wanted more ... Just .. was too shy to ask."
"Aw, Minnie. You don't have to be shy with me. We can do anything you're comfortable with," you shared a sweet smile with him before pulling him back in for a heated kiss.
This was only Seokmin's second instance in kissing you, – last time having been only over a week back – but he now found it easier to match your rhythm and play with your tongue in ways that had you humming against his lips. He wanted to give you pleasure in the way you'd given it to him. So far he felt like he'd been doing well with the kissing. You somehow walked him over to your bedroom without disconnecting your lips, making his heart speed up at the thought of what was coming up next.
He yelped against your lips when you pushed and straddled him on the bed, hands too shy to know where to touch. Fortunately, you didn't leave him hanging for long and positioned them on your waist for him.
"Minnie ... I don't wanna pressure you. So we're gonna do something similar to last time, yeah?"
He was of course in agreement, but ...
"I ... I wanna make you feel good too ... Please?", he almost winced at how pathetic he sounded. He also had absolutely no idea of how to please you. He had never even considered watching porn (being told he'd go to hell for even entertaining such thoughts), nor had he ever received any type of sexual education. As lame as it sounded, Seokmin was completely clueless as to what women did for pleasure. He had been clueless as to how male pleasure worked up until you had shown him.
"Do you want me to teach you how, Minnie?", you asked while unbuttoning his shirt.
"Please ..."
You kissed him again in response, wordlessly taking off both his and your clothes. When you finished, Seokmin couldn't help but feel exposed. However, the thought of his own nudity (sans his boxers) left his mind as soon as he realized you were also down to just your underwear.
With his mouth agape and his arms not knowing where to go, Seokmin simply sat under you and sweat bullets as he attempted not to stare anywhere below your chin.
Noticing his nervous demeanor, you giggled at him and put your hand on his cheek while the other remained on his shoulder.
"Oh, Minnie ... So pretty. Do you even know how pretty you are?", you ran your hands up and down his chest in a sweet manner, "And I'm the only one who gets to see it, hmm? All mine?",
"Y-your .... yes ... for you."
"Fuck. I'm gonna have so much fun with you. Gonna teach you everything."
Despite your words' effect on him, his main focus right now was your almost bare body and its proximity to him. He could feel the heat of your skin against his. His mind kept thinking about what you must look like beneath your underwear, with his eyes heavy and glued to your covered breasts.
"Want me to take off my bra, Minnie? You just have to ask. I'll go as far as you want to go," you pecked his lips yet again, still running your hands up and down his chest.
"Y-yeah. Wanna see you. Is that ... is that okay? Just wanna make you feel as- as good as you did me ..."
Your breath hitched, "Oh, angel ... So sweet and selfless. I'll show you. Fuck, I'll show you everything."
You separated yourself from him a bit in order to give him a full view. Then, in slow and sensual movements, you threw off your bra, proceeding to caress your own breasts as you gave Seokmin a sultry look.
Fuck.
What type of teachings were preventing him from seeing you in your barest of forms? You were nothing lesser than art itself. You were so warm and beautiful; so soft and perfect – both inside and out. Seokmin couldn't believe he had ever considered such things to be scandalous (which admittedly, he still kind of believed). At the same time, he was kind of glad he had never engaged in such acts before, because it allowed for you to be the first (and hopefully last) woman he would ever see in such an intimate setting.
Those thoughts aside, Seokmin was short-circuiting. He was so distracted he didn't even notice you removing your panties and settling back on his lap until you verbally called his attention again.
"Minnie? Wanna feel them? Hmm?", your hands were already on his, leading them directly to your soft mounds.
"F-fuck," he couldn't help but groan upon feeling the weight of them on his hands, "you're so beautiful ... Y-you're, oh fuck-"
Words could not express the unimaginable beauty he was witnessing, nor the arousal he felt at having you so bare and willing in front of him. He didn't know what to do or how he was supposed to react. He felt kind of bad at his wordless state, but he couldn't help being speechless at feeling such pleasure from merely seeing you.
"Like this, Minnie. Just- fuck ... yeah, like that ..." you instructed for his thumbs to play with your nipples, even making him pinch at them. Your sighs and the way you arched your back were enough for Seokmin to want to leave everything behind and dedicate his life to your pleasure.
"K- kiss them? Please, Minnie ..."
He took your order immediately, leaning down to kiss around your nipples, glasses fogging from the close proximity to your skin.
Your sighs intensified and your hand moved to angle his head so that his lips would land on your nipple. Taking the hint, he enveloped your pert nipple in between his lips and sucked, licking and nibbling at it as he saw fit. Eventually he lost himself a bit, allowing his hands to fondle your breasts desperately as he whined into your breast. Your whines for more made him lose his mind, leading to his mind fogging up even more.
This progressed for a while until you finally moved his head away from your tits and stole a wet kiss from his lips.
"You're so good, Minnie. So obedient ... Such a good boy for me," you breathed against his lips, wiping his foggy glasses before slipping them back on.
He physically keened at your praise, not at all used to being praised for such filthy behavior but still extremely pleased he was making you feel good.
"Now ... now I'm gonna show you how to make me feel good, yeah? Still wanna try that, angel?"
He nodded too enthusiastically, glasses coming out of place due to his enthusiasm.
"Okay, baby," you giggled, "Need you to kneel on the floor for me, okay? Right between my legs ..."
Oh. You wanted him to-
He had never explored his sexual desires in any way, so he was fully unaware where exactly this was going, but the thought of looking up at you while he made you feel good between your legs sounded like the holiest act known to human.
He followed your direction, groaning when he saw the hidden space between your legs glisten.
"Oh, God ..."
"Shh, don't use the lord's name in vain, Minnie", you were just teasing, but somehow the reminder of his lord made Seokmin feel a small pang of guilt at the thought of the sin he had been actively committing with you thus far. He decided to push it aside and continue on his path. Nothing mattered to him more right now than your utmost pleasure.
"Lick it?" you used your fingers to open up your folds, letting out even more honey for Seokmin to gawk at.
Wordlessly he got closer and closer, up until his tongue was able to flick at the length of your folds. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding at the taste of your essence, becoming instantly obsessed with its warmth. What he was even more obsessed with, however, was the whine you let out at such a simple touch.
Was it possible for him – an inexperienced and sheltered boy – to make someone like you – a gorgeous and clearly knowledgeable girl – feel this good? He needed to test the theory so he kept licking to his heart's contentment, following the directions your hand gave him as you guided his head against you.
He licked shyly at first, only sucking every now and then as he did his best to act accordingly to the sounds you were making. It didn't help that his mind was plagued by your taste, smell, and the warmth between your legs – not to mention your mewls of pleasure.
"My clit, baby ... Your tongue, angle it here- oh ... fuck, right there, Minnie ..." you angled him so that he could flick his tongue at a tiny little pearl found between your legs.
With all the newfound knowledge he had on how to deliver your pleasure, Seokmin did the best he could to repeat the movements you seemed to really enjoy (at least based on how prettily you'd cry his name after). Despite his mind being completely clouded by the entirety of your person, Seokmin continued to moan and cry against your cunt as he silently begged for more of your cunt against his face.
"M-minnie! Oh ... Fuck. Such a g-good boy ... All mine, shit ... Your tongue, oh ... just like that, angel ... Y-your nose, Minnie, please! Your nose, just- oh! Fuck", you cried for him, at some point taking full control and just grinding against his face as his nose and tongue poked into your most sensitive spots.
Seokmin felt incredibly proud at your mindless state, knowing it was him who had achieved that. Nothing mattered more in that moment than your pleasure; pleasure which only Seokmin could give you.
"Gonna cum for you, angel. Lick it all for me? Be a good boy and take it for me, yeah? Shit!", you practically vibrated against him as your high took over you.
Seokmin kept his face between your legs as you came, doing his best to lick at every single drop of essence and moaning at the taste of you. He allowed you to use his face as you saw fit, reveling in the knowledge that he had given you such other-worldly pleasure.
He didn't know it was possible for him to feel such pleasure from just watching you, but now he understood. If anyone asked, this was what heaven was supposed to look like – a beautiful girl losing herself to Seokmin's touch as he himself tried not to lose his own mind.
Throughout the entirety of your orgasm, Seokmin couldn't control his hips as they ground against the bed with a complete lack of rhythm, simply humping animalistically at you taking over every single one of his senses.
After a few moments of aftershock, you suddenly pulled Seokmin up and attacked him with a filthy kiss; filthier than any you'd shared before.
Your kiss alone had Seokmin struggling to keep himself from cumming in his boxers. You had been testing his self-control from the moment you teased him in class earlier today and he just wasn't sure how much longer he could take until pleasure took over him once again.
"Want me to try it on you, Minnie?", you asked once you pulled away from the kiss.
"That? O-on me?"
"Mhmm. My mouth on you? Is that okay?", you pecked his lips again, seemingly unable to disconnect from him for too long (which Seokmin thoroughly related to).
"Yes", he deadpanned, still out of breath from being suffocated by your thighs and then your lips just moments ago.
You wasted no time in removing his boxers. Seokmin felt slightly shy at this, having never let anyone ever see him nude before. Even last time he had been with you, you had pleasured him through his clothes and not seen past his shirtless state thus far.
But you praised him as soon as he was fully nude, kissing up and down his thighs as you told him how beautiful he was, how pretty and deserving of praise you believed him to be. His whole body heat up at your soft words, with goosebumps forming at your soft kisses that led up closer and closer to where he was aching the most.
He gasped when you finally took a hold of his member, bringing your face close enough to give the weeping tip a kiss.
"O-oh ..." he threw his head back at the sweet yet filthy gesture.
You giggled under your breath and began kitten licking at his tip, sucking lightly every so often. He felt like he had finally arrived to heaven. All those stories about what awaited his good behavior while on earth must've been lies, because he found the greatest reward of all in the form of your mouth wrapped around him.
Getting braver by the second, you put almost the entirety of him in your mouth, doing things with your tongue and lips that his poor brain couldn't even process. He whined and cried at your movements, not able to understand how easily you could bring him to tears.
As he quickly neared his high, his mind turned into mush, not allowing him to register what was going on with his body. All he knew was that his cries got louder by the second, his cheeks now damp with the tears that wouldn't stop falling from his eyes. His hips were uncontrollable, having to be restrained by your hands as he chased for his high with the utmost desperation.
"P-please! I need ... Fuck, please ..." he begged for nothing in particular as his high completely took over.
He felt dirty and disrespectful as he did it, but he came inside your mouth, wincing at the way your moans vibrated while he was still in your mouth. He couldn't help himself; his thoughts had been completely overtaken by the pleasure.
His cries had not stopped as of yet, even rendering him emotional as the high of his orgasm wore down. Now was the moment of regret, knowing he had broken his unspoken oath of celibacy yet again.
This was something all people in his community swore to. It was rarely ever spoken about, but Seokmin knew that he was supposed to save himself for marriage – in every sense. Despite already having quite strong feelings towards you and the things you did to him, Seokmin still felt like he had somehow disrespected you by engaging in such acts with you. But more than anything, he felt like he had disappointed God.
So he cried. He cried into his hands despite how embarrassed he felt at doing such thing in front of you, specially after having shared such intimacy.
"Oh, Minnie ..." you coo'd at him, getting up to hold his large frame in your arms.
You allowed him to exhaust his cries as he quietly asked for forgiveness. He didn't have to explain himself, as you understood. You made your understanding evident by reassuring him that he had done nothing wrong, and that he was still such a good man.
He believed your words and thanked you, eventually calming down enough to stop crying and speak coherently.
"Do you ... do you think He'd be disappointed in me?", he knew it was a stupid question to ask considering your lack of religion. The two of you had never thoroughly discussed religion with one another, but he knew you at least understood where he was coming from.
You pouted at him, cooing at him as you responded, "Of course not, Minnie. He loves you. You're such a good boy; treat everyone so kindly even when they don't deserve it. Treat me so kindly ... No matter what anyone ever tells you, what we just did is no sin", you explained.
"B- but the bible-"
"Shhh. Your faith is your own. No one can take that away from you, Minnie. Even if I don't share those beliefs anymore, I know an amazing person when I see one. You've done nothing wrong, okay?", you caressed his cheek and pecked his lips to drive your point home.
He nodded as he tried not to tear up at your kindness.
Him even questioning his actions' consequences on his faith would've provided him with a scolding from his parents or a look in disapproval from his reverend. But in turn you gave him acceptance and love. There was no way in his mind to believe that being with you – feeling good with you – was anything other than the holiest act he could engage in.
"Do you regret it?", you interrupted his thoughts.
"N-no, of course not ... It's just ..."
"I'd never want to make you do something you don't wanna do. I ... I know we haven't known each other for long, but I like you, Seokmin. I don't want you to think I'm just trying to ... corrupt you."
"You're not!," in a change of pace, he grabbed onto your hands and looked directly into your eyes as he spoke, "Everything you've taught me, I've wanted it too. I ... I like you too."
You smiled at this, squeezing his hands affectionately, "Yeah? Does that mean you wanna keep hanging out?"
"Yeah, I'd love that."
~
Unfortunately, time for Seokmin to go home eventually came and he bid his goodbyes to you.
The two of you spent a few hours after your heart to heart actually working on your project and later watching a few episodes of a show you said you'd been watching on Hulu. It was a nice time for Seokmin to get to know you outside of school, and it only reinstated how much he liked you already.
It was about 10PM by the time he got home, which was usually around the time he went to sleep due to the early hours of his classes the following day. Almost as soon as he finished his nightly skincare and prepared himself to go to sleep, he suddenly got a call.
It was odd for him to get calls in general, but this time around he knew who it'd be before even checking his phone.
It was his parents.
Seokmin had seen this coming. He had gotten too into his head this past week; too into you. Not only had he neglected contacting his parents as frequently as they had agreed (re: every night in order to 'keep a close eye on him'), but he had also been neglecting his religious duties. He had not kept contact with any of his religious friends from back home nor had he even attended church as of late. And surprisingly ... Seokmin had not minded these recent developments. He felt freer than ever. For the first time in his life, he was not under constant surveillance, receiving judgment for any instance in which his parents believed him to step out of line in his religious lifestyle.
Back home, a single absence from bi-weekly mass would be met with passive aggressive disapproval. Any instance in which Seokmin expressed interest in anything outside of the church (such as non catholic music and dance – both of which his parents had immediately shut down), he felt as if he was breaking a law at the way in which his parents would scold him for ever even considering such 'perverted' hobbies.
Upon moving away, Seokmin had begun to realize that his upbringing hadn't been as perfect as he had thought it to be, that his parents didn't love him as unconditionally as he first thought. He thought back to his brother's estrangement from his family and felt regret at not standing up for him, knowing that his parents would turn on him just as fast as they did Jeonghan.
With a sigh, he picked up the call, mustering as much interest as he could. He made some excuse as to why he had been unable to keep in contact and promised to be better moving forward. He faked a smile in his voice and forced his way through a peaceful call (sans the few passive aggressive comments his parents threw his way) and called it a night.
For the first time in his life, he put religion and his parents aside to give himself a restful sleep, only looking forward to seeing you the next morning and going to sleep with the remembrance of what the two of you did fresh in his mind.
"Oh ... I- please ..."
"Just like that, Minnie, fuck ... Don't move, angel. Just let me do all the work, yeah?", you ground against him even faster, angling your hips so that his member would grace against your clothed folds.
It seemed like the dam had broken for you at the same time as it had for Seokmin, because you had jumped him the very next time he made his way through the threshold of your apartment.
The two of you kissed until exhausting yourselves, leading Seokmin to beg you to undress both you and him (with pleading eyes rather than verbally, as he was still too shy to beg for such things with words).
It was only one day after you had given Seokmin oral (a concept which you had introduced him to), which somehow made Seokmin even more desperate to have you. Even after his parents' call ruining his mood, you had managed to bring it back up immediately after when you messaged him late at night suggesting the two of you meet up today. After spending the entire day together, Seokmin walked you home yet again, only to be jumped by you (once again) upon entering your apartment.
One thing led to another and Seokmin found himself fully unclothed under you as you ground against him through the thin layer of your panties. Seokmin was completely weightless under you, becoming a shell of his old self as he desperately guided your hips to grind against him. He wasn't sure where this would lead, but he felt the usual conflict that always arose when the two of you were alone like this. Even through all your reassurance, Seokmin felt as if he was betraying an oath by engaging with his sexual desires for you. However, these thoughts were immediately pushed aside when you leaned back down to kiss him again.
The kiss was nasty, for lack of a better word. Seokmin didn't fully realize it, but his desperation for your touch would sometimes render him into a sloppy kisser, but you seemed to not mind it as you moaned and licked into his mouth any time his kisses got a bit messy. Your grinding got more and more intense by the second, throwing your head back at the way Seokmin senselessly canted his hips against your own.
"M-minnie ... Want more ... Is that okay? Just need to feel you so bad ... Please ..."
"M-more?"
"Do you want it too, Minnie? Wanna know what it feels like?"
"Show me? Wh- Oh ..."
"You want it too, don't you? Hmm? You're so hard against me, angel. Don't you wanna feel me?"
"I just ..."
Before he could formulate a response through the lust that was clouding his mind, you suddenly brought one of his hands between your bodies, going behind the forbidden threshold of your underwear. Anxious but also incredibly turned on, Seokmin fell limp and allowed you to do whatever you wanted. You grabbed his middle and pointer fingers, angling them so that they could seamlessly slip between your folds. Though Seokmin had already felt the wetness between your legs the day prior, he had not properly felt just how warm and tight you could be.
"Oh, it's so ... Fuck," he moaned when you began guiding his hand so his fingers could go in and out.
"Shit, Minnie ... So good ... Wanna feel it now, angel? Will you give it to me?", you slipped his fingers out after proving your point, now going back to caressing his cheek with your own hand.
"B-but ... It's a sin ..." he let out before even realizing. Even with your constant reassurance up to this point, Seokmin still felt ties to his faith that made him second-guess himself.
He knew that he had already gone past certain point with you, and that having sex with you wouldn't make much difference in his morality, but he still thought of all the teachings of celibacy and all the censorship his community had forced onto him. Was this the right choice? His body was screaming at him to let himself go and seek his high from you. His mind was telling him similar things, though there was also emphasis on the fact that doing this with you, of all people, would be the best choice he could ever make.
"Angel ... It's okay to want it. You don't have to be scared ... I'll take care of you. Just wanna be close to you, Minnie. Don't you want that too? Hmm? Just like you so much, angel," you kisses softly at his chest as you said this, breaking his resolve.
And you were right. He wanted this so badly. He wanted to be as close to you as possible, to give himself to you in the most intimate way he could.
"Y-yes. Want you so much ..." he was shy as he said it, but he meant it to the fullest extent.
You proceeded to sensually remove your underwear, sitting back down above Seokmin's dick as you made a show of grinding your nude pelvises against one another, making Seokmin cry out in desperation.
Any doubts he had left him as soon as you allowed his tip to slip in, throwing his head back as he finally felt your warmth envelop him. You let out a variety of expletives at the feelings, all while clawing at Seokmin's chest, something that had his back arching in unexpected pleasure.
"Oh, Minnie ... So full, f-fuck ..." you moaned out, taking on a slow yet deep pace that made Seokmin shut his eyes and scrunch his nose.
Seokmin couldn't describe the pleasure you were giving him. He was practically frozen in place, the only part of his body still conscious were his hands, which were likely bruising your hips from how hard he was digging his fingers onto them. He needed to keep himself grounded, but he truly felt like today was judgment day, and he had gone to heaven.
"Open your eyes, angel. Wanna see you," your hand reached over to his cheek, angling his head so he could look your way rather than keep his head in its thrown back state.
He opened his eyes to find you smiling down at him with the light hanging on your ceiling providing the best view of you possible. You looked like an angel gazing down at him, like you came down to give him the greatest ruin and drag him back up with you. You had corrupted him in the best way possible.
"Oh, Minnie ... So beautiful. My prettiest boy ... Does it feel good, angel?", he nodded and let out a whine at your soft inquiries, "Yeah? How's it feel when I do this?", you squeezed around him, now bouncing rather than grinding against him, making him close his eyes back up and cry out your name.
"I- Please! I need ...", his nails clawed at your hips and back, begging for something unknown to him. He needed more, but he wasn't sure of what.
"I know, pretty. Gonna give it to you, just- fuck ... Just need you to be good for me, yeah?," you hiccuped, leaning down to kiss him again.
He cried against your lips, eyes rolling back when your tongue began dancing with his own, your hands reaching down to toy with his nipples. You were giving him too many things at once, making the overstimulation take over his already hazy brain. He didn't care about any moral repercussions to what you were doing together. Every time you touched him further solidified how right being with you felt.
Only a few moments of your ministrations were enough for Seokmin to feel that familiar coil begin to tighten. He knew his end was near, causing him to grow restless as he planted his legs on the bed and humped against you. Despite his lack of proper technique and the sloppiness of his movements, you matched his own and wailed his name.
Your hands came down to bring his up and pin them above his head, grinding deeper and deeper against him as the two of you crazily chased your highs. The bed shook against the wall at the intensity of your actions, with nothing but nasty sounds of your muffled moans and your arousal filling up the silence. Eventually you disconnected your lips, eyeing the string of spit that connected you before burying your head in the crook of his neck.
"I- I like you so much," he groaned out, high-pitched and breathless.
"Like you so fucking m-much! You have no idea ..." you reciprocated his words as you clamped down around him and let yourself be taken by your high. Your high was more than enough to trigger his own, leaving him in a practically astral state for a few moments as his hands ran frantically up and down your body, squeezing and scratching every so often.
When your highs finally wore down, you laid yourself beside him, cuddling him near you so you could wrap your legs around him and bring him as close as possible. You faced each other as you caught your breaths, running your hands along the length of his back as his own rubbed at your hips. The moment was pure bliss.
"Do you regret it?"
"No. I could never regret anything we've done. I- I'm sorry if I made you feel that way," he looked away from your eyes.
You nudged him to look at you once more, "Don't apologize, Minnie. I understand. I'm happy I was your first. Maybe one day I'll teach you even more fun things," you flirted through a giggle.
"Oh, I- Hah, yeah", he was caught off guard by your flirting, but still laughed along.
Yeah, he wouldn't mind that.
Over the following weeks, Seokmin did a better job of keeping up with his parents. He kept a safe distance while still giving them the belief that he was still fully engaged in the religious spaces they had envisioned for him. However, he could not help but lie when it came to what occupied his day to day life – you. He didn't bring you up, which you agreed upon after a tearful conversation in which Seokmin detailed his upbringing, leading you to spend the night up with him as you comforted him. He was also yet to attend mass again, and he even occasionally skipped the bi-weekly meetings of his church group – though only when you skipped also. These were a few of the things he kept secret from his family – advice from his brother Jeonghan, who he had recently gotten in contact with again.
Seokmin's faith was still standing; his relationship with God was slightly injured by his internal conflict about your sexual relationship, though he was now sure that he felt no regrets at anything the two of you had engaged in. To him, being with you felt like the biggest reward he could have ever hoped for. Seokmin realized quickly that his issue really laid with the catholic community in which he had been brought up, rather than his relationship with God itself. He disagreed with the judgmental and overbearing way in which certain catholics circles ran, something which he distanced himself from upon meeting you.
You had even introduced him to a few of your friends, some which were even catholic like him. Your buddy Joshua was one of the chillest guys he had ever met, yet his faith was pretty intact. This made Seokmin feel less guilt, though his balance between what was right and wrong in the eyes of God was still a bit of a mess. Luckily he had you help him navigate his way through that.
Along with all these developments, Seokmin had also begun speaking to his brother Jeonghan again (behind his parents' backs, of course). It made him happy to know that despite his brother straying away from his community, he had ended up happy with his life, leading a steady relationship and being happy away from his parents' constant religious persecution.
And you ... You had become official in these past few weeks, making Seokmin constantly have to pinch himself to confirm whether or not he was imagining all this. He was still a very shy and awkward individual, usually opting to hang out alone with you in either of your apartments. He appreciated how patient you were with him, never judging him for being a bit different and even teaching him the pleasures he had been missing out on during his very restricted upbringing. You had become a piece of heaven on earth to Seokmin, corrupting him, but only in the best of ways.
a/n: i left so many things unresolved here oops but all i cared about was seokmin's character development and we got there in the end so! anyways hope u guys enjoyed!!
To read short 2k word continuation u can go join my monthly tier on kofi or patreon!
content:
wc: 587 (teaser); 2080 (full drabble)
sneak peak:
Seokmin was, yet again, at a crossroads. Though this time it wasn't anything too serious, or maybe it was.
By current time, it had now been four months since the two of you had begun dating. 'I love you's' were shared and multiple sleep overs were had. Your relationship had been everything anyone could hope for a first relationship, and Seokmin now felt way more at ease whenever the two of you did anything sexual.
Admittedly, Seokmin was still slightly awkward about it, still never allowing himself to start sexual interactions and simply following your lead. Which was the crux of his current predicament.
He was unsure if he had done something wrong, if he had maybe insulted you or maybe there was some other unknown reason behind, but it had been over a week since the two of you had slept together. Over the past four months, the two of you spent most of your nights together, taking on a very domestic routine within the first two months of your relationship. Though you obviously didn't get down to sexual activities every day, it was common for it to happen a few times a week (at the least).
It usually began with you cornering Seokmin against the wall after a tiring day of college, or sometimes it began during a movie night in which you couldn't keep your hands to yourself. Whatever it was, you were always giving Seokmin an opening to entertain his sexual desires with you whenever he pleased. Even though he was always too shy to ask, it was almost as if you were able to read his mind and always incite him when he needed it most.
His sexual desires for you had grown quite a lot, making Seokmin worry at times. Was it normal how badly he wanted you at all times? Was this a consequence of having never before received pleasure until meeting you? He felt like a degenerate sometimes, from how badly he wanted you. Which was the main reason as to why he grew antsy so quickly after not having sex with you for the past week or so.
In contrast to these past months, this past week and a half (nine days to be exact; not that Seokmin was keeping count or anything), you had not given Seokmin anything further than a sweet peck on the lips whenever the two of you fell asleep next to each other. You didn't act any differently past that, still showering him with love and spending as much time as you could with him.
It wasn't that Seokmin expected sex from you or anything, but ever since you had taught him how pleasurable it could be to have a romantic partner, he could not see himself ever going back to his old, puritan lifestyle. Seokmin had become, for lack of a better word, an addict. He couldn't help himself in desiring you every time he caught an inch of your bare legs or the soft skin of your breasts through your cleavage. He had deprived himself of sex for far too long and now he could no longer live without it.
He didn't want to seem desperate, or as if he only valued you for sex, but he needed to get to the bottom of this and find a way to get you to touch him again. He was far too shy to ever ask you directly, but he would work his hardest to entice you into letting him have you again
...
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All Bark and No Bite 11
Masterlist /Series masterlist
Chan x reader (y/n) x ot8
ABO!Nonidol!SKZ Alternate Universe
Previous - Next
Series Warnings: Fem reader, Smut, verryyyy nsfw, chan x reader, OT8 x reader, A/B/O, m/m/f smut, possessive! SKZ, possessive! Reader, anxiety and depression, reader is a CRYBABY, fluff, angst, virgin!reader, cursing, violence, pet names, dom/sub dynamics, Sub reader x mostly dom SKZ, misogyny and sexism, Ateez are depicted as terrible people (sorry Atiny!)
Chapter warnings: Smut, unprotected sex (p in v), kissing, suggestive, crying, cursing, fingering, biting, hair pulling, dubcon?, subspace, HardDom!Chan, SoftDom!Felix, fluff, angst, anxiety, manipulation, unbalanced power dynamics, and probably more but idk let me know This one ain't as sweet as the last few
WC:6.8k
In a strange turn of events, it seems Chan woke up before you did this time. Not that you were complaining; especially when you awoke to him running his warm fingers over your mating mark absentmindedly, feeling the indented skin. Every little touch felt like electricity coursing through you, as if the zaps were bringing you back to life. Overall it was a very pleasant way to wake up.
His hand that wasn’t touching your neck had his phone and he was listening to music with one ear bud in his ear on a low volume. You let out a low ‘hm’ letting him know you were awake now.
“Good morning, my omega.” Chans voice was raspy from sleep. He must have only just woken up not long ago himself. He didn’t say anything else, just held you tighter.
Moments like this were Chan's favorite. Being able to wake up to you; his mate, his omega, the love of his life - there was nothing better. He hadn’t realized how lonely he had been before having you here. He never felt as complete as he did right in this moment.
“Can I listen with you?” You mumbled sleepily. You wanted to hear what your alpha listened to. Wordlessly he took his other earbud and slipped it into your own ear. ‘Give me love’ By Ed sheeran was playing through the bud, the sweet melodies flooding your senses.
‘Give a little time to me or burn this out
We'll play hide and seek to turn this around
All I want is the taste that your lips allow
My, my, my, my, oh give me love’
It had been so long since you had heard this song, you used to sing this all the time in your room when you were younger and waiting to fall hopelessly in love. It felt fitting that now you were here laying in bed with your soulmate, who you had fallen hopelessly in love with.
Chan began to sing along softly to the music playing, serenading you quietly.
‘Maybe I should let you go
You know I'll fight my corner
And that tonight I'll call ya
After my blood is drowning in alcohol
No I just wanna hold ya’
The alpha squeezed you a little tighter after he sang those words, pressing a kiss to the side of your head. Your heart fluttered at the action. The two of you laid there together for probably an hour, just enjoying each other's company while he sang each song that played.
Eventually though, you both had to get up as there was work to be done. For Chan anyways. You had to make breakfast and get ready to leave with Jisung and Felix. Chan had a lot to do today himself. He had been neglecting his actual job in his family business and if he was going to take another day off tomorrow to go camping then he definitely needed to make all his calls and emails today.
“Are you excited to do more shopping with the betas today?” the alpha asked as you were both getting out of bed.
“Yes. I am.” You seemed apprehensive.
“Buuuuut?” He pressed, knowing something was troubling you.
“I just.. Feel bad.. About spending more of your money. I didn’t do anything to deserve you guys spending all this money on me.” You were avoiding eye contact with him as you went to brush your teeth.
Chan stopped you before you could enter his bathroom, arm out to block you. “Baby.” you kept your head down not wanting to look at him, now that you had embarrassed yourself again. When you didn’t acknowledge him he let out a frustrated growl, “Omega, look at me now.” you had no choice but to look at him, he used a command on you.
You were lucky that was all he did, he had wanted to grip your hair and make you look at him forcefully. Chan had a problem when people didn’t listen to him, especially his omega. Some would say he thrives off of non-sexual dominance. They would be correct. The alpha was used to getting his way practically his whole life. He would forgive you now, you were still learning.
Instead of yanking your hair he settled for petting it softly. “I’m sorry my love, I didn’t intend to be mean to you.” At his gentle words and even gentler touch you forgot about the command being used on you, leaning into his hand. “You need to understand that my money is your money. In fact this whole packs money is yours to spend as you please. The other boys would agree with me. Ok?” He waited for your words of agreement and when they didn’t come he egged them on. “You wanna be good for us right? Good omegas listen to their alphas.”
You wanted to be good for him so badly, really it’s all you wanted. There was a glimpse of panic on your face at the prospect of upsetting your mate. “ I’ll be good! I promise!” You nodded rapidly.
He gave you his signature boyish grin, dimples on display, then leaned in and gave you a kiss, nipping your lip as he pulled back. “I know you will, Baby. You’re the best Omega I know.” You purred at his praise, finding it addicting. “We gotta get a move on, lots to do today if we’re going camping tomorrow.” He let you go into the bathroom to do your business and such.
You went to pick out an outfit for today, deciding to sport some jean shorts and a basic black tank top. After that you had a quick shower and did light makeup. Simple but you felt cute nonetheless.
When you both finally made your way down to the main floor you found Minho and Changbin sat at the kitchen island making a list of what you would need for camping tomorrow. More like Minho had roped Changbin into helping him because the beta was a planner and liked to have things ready.
“Finally! Hyung needs help deciding what to do for food tomorrow and Saturday morning. Any suggestions?” Changbin exclaimed as he saw Chan, giving the older alpha pleading eyes.
“Good morning to you too Changbin. Oh I slept great, thanks for asking.” Chan quipped sarcastically, and Changbin rolled his eyes with a groan of annoyance.
“Good morning, baby. How did you sleep?” The younger alpha asked you, trying to get on his Hyungs nerves. He cackled when it worked, Chan letting out a huff.
You giggled, “Morning, Binnie. I slept wonderfully. Thank you for asking.”
“Yeah yeah good morning whatever, can we get back to this now?” Minho was getting frustrated, “We literally only have right now to think about this.”
“Fine.” Changbin reached forward and grabbed you by the hips, laughing when you squealed, and setting you on his lap. “What do you think, baby? Any suggestions?”
You leaned back against Changbins chest, feeling the muscles behind you, head on his shoulder while you pondered. “Do you think we should do easy things? Like maybe bring a bunch of premade stuff like sandwiches and maybe breakfast burritos for the morning we can just wrap in foil and throw on the grill?”
“That sounds like a great idea, omega.” Chan replied, leaning on the counter opposite you.
“Yeah! To make it even easier we can place an order for them and pick them up from the diner in town before we leave tomorrow morning.” Changbin agreed, tickling your sides mercifully. He kissed the side of your head when you giggled at him, ignoring the throbbing in his pants caused by your squirming. “Smarty pants.”
Minho nodded in agreement, writing down how many of each he approximated you would all need. “Ok so twenty of each.”
“Twenty?! Why twenty of each, there are only nine of us!” You objected confused, looking at Minho as if he had grown a second head.
“Have you not seen how much these guys eat? Changbin himself could probably put away half of them if you’d let him.” He was looking back at you as if you were the crazy one.
“Hey!” Changbin protested but didn’t fight too hard, knowing Minho was right.
“Yeah Bin, you’ll probably end up eating both of yours and the rest of Felix’s like you always do.” Chan poked fun at the younger alpha.
“What are we talking about? I heard my name.” right on queue Felix walked into the room you were all in.
“We’re talking about the plans for tomorrow, trying to get things taken care of.” Minho sighed, standing from his seat. “Speaking of which, I need to make calls for these orders to be picked up in the morning and then get the other stuff together.” He seemed stressed as he walked away.
“Is he ok?” You asked, worried for the beta.
“Oh yeah he's fine, Min is a planner and likes to get things done in advance. He’s probably going to find Innie to make him help get all the camping stuff out of the garage.” Chan answered, taking an apple off the counter and taking a bite.
At the sight of his apple you remembered your task, “ Do you guys want breakfast?” You went to hop down from Changbins lap but he only held you tighter against him, refusing to let you go.
“Ji should be back any second with pasties and coffee. He wanted to surprise you baby. Annnnd now i’ve ruined it, fuck.” Felix cursed, looking remorseful at having spoiled the fun.
Chan clicked his tongue in mock disappointment, shaking his head. “Way to go, Felix.”
“Hey leave him alone, he's just a boy!” Changbin defended the beta playfully, you leaning into him and huffing in agreement.
“Did somebody say Jisung?!?” A loud voice came from the front door, almost an announcement of his presence. A moment later the boy in question came sauntering in, sunglasses still over his eyes and holding a tray of coffee and a bag of pastries.
“No.” Changbin laments, “Go away.”
“Fine I guess you don’t want the cherry tart I got especially for you, Binnie.” Jisung made a show of wafting the bag up to his nose, “Mmmmm all for me then. Here is yours, my baby. A sweet treat for an even sweeter girl.” He handed you a chocolate croissant and a coffee.
You felt your face heat up as you accepted the pastry. “Thank you Ji.” When Binnie was distracted making grabby hands at the bag that jisung had set down, you took the opportunity to slip off his lap.
“Anything for you.” He grabbed your hand and yanked you closer to him. “Anyways, let's get this show on the road!” with his coffee in one hand and you in the other he set off towards the door. Chan held out a credit card for Jisung who happily snatched it. “Make sure she gets something nice. Our girl seems to have a problem with spending my money.” He winked at you as you passed.
“Oh you know I have no problem spending daddy's money.” The beta cackled.
“Wait for me!” Felix called, scooping his own items and following you out.
“Bye baby!” Changbin yelled, crumbs flying out of his mouth.
“Have a good time, omega.”
“Bye Channie bye Binnie!” You called as you were going out the door.
To say Eun was happy to see you again was an understatement. The second you walked into her shop she had a tight grip on you, hugging the life outta you. The older woman was unable to hold back tears at the sight of the bite mark on your neck, wailing about how happy she was for you and Chan and that the alpha couldn’t be luckier to have landed such a fantastic omega. You had reassured her you were in fact the lucky one.
It took another half an hour of chatting with her before she finally brought you out some swimsuits to try on. You had picked out a few modest one pieces for yourself but her and the boys suggested (demanded) you try on their picks first, an array of bikinis. You had never worn a bikini before so trying them on and modeling them was making you nervous.
You had chosen a basic white one to start. You figured you would start plain and work up to getting more comfortable. You thought it was cute but knew it wouldn't be the one. Thus began you trying a few different ones until you found one you liked. It had been almost 20 minutes since you had gone into the dressing room and the beta boys were getting antsy waiting for you to come out.
“Everything alright in there, baby?” The deep honey tones of Felix's voice called out to you.
“Y-yeah.” you stuttered, debating whether or not to come out. “I’ve never- never worn a bikini before and I’m a little nervous.” you admitted.
“If you’re really not comfortable you can try something else, we won’t be mad or disappointed.” He reassured you.
You felt better at his words, taking a deep breath before pulling back the curtain and revealing yourself.
Both Jisung and Felix felt their eyes widen and hearts stop at the sight of you. You had decided on a little purple bikini with stars on it. It was so you. The swimsuit fits you like a glove and goes perfectly with your skin tone.
They both had been too busy admiring you to say anything and in turn their silence made you self conscious. “I knew this was a bad idea.” You mumbled, covering yourself with your arms and going to shuffle back into the fitting room.
“NO!” they yelled in unison looking at you in panic now. Felix tried to compose himself but Jisung did not, falling to the floor at your feet.
“I’m sorry baby! You look so, so good we couldn’t help but stare!” He pleaded, his heart thumping wildly.
Felix nodded in agreement, now more embarrassed than anything at his fellow betas' antics.
“ Please don’t turn away from us. We didn’t mean to make you feel any negativity. We love the suit. It fits you so well!”
“Really? You’re not just saying that to make me feel better?” You asked skeptically, still covering yourself.
“Baby, my baby, omega, believe me when I say this, if you don’t get that swimsuit I will literally drop dead.” Jisung was so serious from his place on the floor, not one hint of deception on his face. “I simply cannot go on living any longer knowing I will never again get to see your beauty in this bikini - which was made for you by the way- and soon I'll die. In fact even hearing you say it was a bad idea almost killed me on the spot.”
“Oh don’t be so damn dramatic!” Eun called out walking up to the three of you. “But you do look fantastic in that one, Y/n. It would be a real crime if you didn’t get it.” She winked.
It seemed all three betas were rooting for this one so it seemed your fate was sealed.
“I-if you’re all sure…” You trailed off, letting your arms fall to your sides now.
“Never been more sure about anything, sweetheart.” Felix gave you his charming smile.
You hummed, “Fine. I’ll get this one.” There was a round of cheers then Eun went to ring you up, adding a few more pieces she thought would suit you.
Felixs’ big errand was buying blue hair dye. Apparently he used to have blue hair but it's been a while and he’s ready to feel like himself again. He was too precious. You wondered if Chan would be ok with you dying your hair, figuring it wouldn't hurt to ask. Jisung tried to convince you to get some purple dye anyway and not tell him but you were too chicken shit to do something like that.
“Do you wanna help me dye mine, baby? I would love your company.” Felix asked you, crinkling his eyes at you.
Pulling back up to the house you found Jeongin, Minho and Seungmin outside putting some large camping items in the back of a truck. By the looks of it they had already loaded a grill and a few tents. Minho sure didn’t waste time. “There you are, now you can help too.” He eyed the younger boys.
“Actually y/n and I have a few things to do.” Felix grabbed your hand as you got out of the car, his other hand holding your bags. “Sungie would love to help you tho, i'm sure.”
“What?! Traitor!” Jisung complained but was quick to change his tune when Min gave him the evil eye. “I mean, yay packing.”
“We all have to do our part. You included.” Jeongin snickered, handing the beta a bag to put in the car. “At least you didn’t have to make a store run like Hyun and Bin hyung.”
“This was your idea! You should be doing all the work!”
Felix pulled you along into the house, quickly to go undetected “come on before they rope us into helping.” he whispered.
Both of you went up the stairs into Felix's bathroom after you dropped your bags off in your room. Passing Chan's office you could faintly hear the alpha in there on the phone, probably talking with a client. The fact that he works so hard so his pack could have the life they live was astounding. Chan really was a great alpha.
Entering the bathroom Felix reached under the sink for plastic gloves for you to use, and set up the dye. You had helped your old best friend dye her hair a few times so the process was familiar to you. Thankfully his hair was already bleach blonde so you didn’t have to worry about trying to bleach it.
You loved spending time with Felix. Really you loved any one on one time with the boys but you and Felix hadn’t spent time like this since your first day. That felt like so long ago when in reality had only been over a week. They say time flies when you're spending it with your loved ones.
You were discussing what you wanted to plant in the greenhouse when you came back from camping. Cucumbers, pumpkins and peppers were at the top of your list, while Felix requested some carrots and spinach if you could find the room. In only a few hours you had finished dying his hair and had just helped him wash out the dye. He had chosen a beautiful blue for his hair. It seemed to compliment him perfectly. Now it seemed like he was representing who he truly was, with his hair being a clear sky and he himself was the sun.
“You’re all finished! It looks so good on you Lix!” You were enthused, pleased with the finished product.
“All thanks to you baby.” He pulled a blow dryer from under the sink and plugged it in. “Now I'm gonna dry it. Do you wanna help me style it?” Felix really just wanted to be around you more, he wanted to be selfish if only for a while.
“Sure Lixie.” you beamed, reaching for the dryer. You were sitting on the bathroom counter while Felix stood directly in front of you. You turned it on a low setting and grabbed a brush in your other hand, he leaned closer to you and came to stand between your legs.
You began to dry and style his hair, neither of you saying anything now but it not being uncomfortable. In fact it was pleasant. Being close with him reminded you of the kiss he shared with you last night. Not you nor he had brought up the kiss, and he also hadn’t kissed you since. ‘Maybe he regretted kissing me’ the thought weighed heavy on your mind.
Little did you know it was the exact opposite. The only thing on Felix's mind right now was kissing you. He was just worried you hadn’t liked it since you didn’t say anything about it, but you also weren’t acting any different. He was so close to you he could almost taste you, remembering the way your lips did even for that brief moment.
You finished with his hair and set down the tools on the countertop beside you. You were still facing him, afraid to break the silence or to move from your place in front of him. All you could do was focus on each other.
Slowly and timidly, Felix leaned closer to you. You could feel his breath on your face and his scent get even stronger, and Felix gingerly let his lips find yours. Your eyes closed on instinct as you pressed yours to his in return.
‘Finally’ your inner voice said.
When Felix felt you reciprocate his kiss he let out a small whimper, you wouldn’t have even heard it if you weren’t so close to him. His hands fell to your waist and he shuffled even closer to you when you parted your legs further to allow him to make the connection between you. Your own hands were on his shoulders.
The beta didn’t go any further and settled for what you were giving him. He wanted to go at your pace, afraid he would do something to scare you off. While you did enjoy his kiss it suddenly was not enough for you so you took the initiative to gently run your tongue along his lip. When he felt your tongue he whimpered again this time a little louder. His sounds were doing something to you and without thinking you rolled your hips against his.
When your pelvis made contact with his it’s like the damn broke for him and he let the niceties fall. Felix started to ravage your mouth now with his own tongue, his hands gripping you tighter and his own hips doing a roll. Your breath caught in your throat as a quiet moan escaped your lungs.
He held you like that for a while, you both basically dry humping on the counter and tasting each other's mouths. Eventually it was becoming too much for the beta, he knew he would cum in his pants soon and he did not want to do that in front of you. He pulled back from your lips , only a few inches apart.
“Do you want to go further with me, baby?” He prayed you said yes. You had him so worked up he didn’t think jerking off would suffice anymore.
“Please, Lixie. Wanna feel you.”
Fuck
That was all he needed to lift you from the counter onto your feet, then he grabbed the bottom of your tank top and pulled it off of you. He groaned at the sight of your lace bra. You made grabby hands at his own shirt and pulled it over his head.
Felix was so defined. He was so tiny the thought had never even crossed your mind that he could also be ripped. You didn’t have much time to stare before he was turning you around to face the mirror with his hands on your hips and lips on your neck as he locked eyes with you in the mirror. “Can I take you like this, Baby? Let me see all of you?” He let a hand creep up your back to the clasp on your bra, but not yet taking it off.
You nodded, and answered “Uh huh. Yes lixie.” You were so ready for him. Honestly you had been wet since before you styled his hair. You would be surprised if Felix somehow didn't notice the sickly sweet pheromones that were draining out of you.
Felix unclasped your bra with nimble fingers and let it fall away from you. “Oh my god you're so beautiful.” He groaned out when he saw your bare chest. That same hand came to the front of your body and found your right breast, his thumb coming up to rub over your nipple. Now it was your turn to moan out, leaning closer to his chest. “Put your hands on the counter in front of you, baby.”
You did so without complaint and put your palms flat on the surface. He fondled your chest for a few minutes, taking in all the little sighs and moans you would let out as he watched your expressions in the mirror, finding it addicting. When you pushed your ass back into his crotch he let out an almost silent growl, nipping into the skin on your neck that he had been kissing. Suddenly he released you and went to the waistband of your pants, yanking them down your legs with no warning taking your underwear with them.
Felix didn’t know what was overtaking him but he didn’t mind it. He was never this assertive when having sex but something about you made him want to take control. Whether it was your omega status or just your submissive nature in general he couldn’t be sure. Probably a combination of both. You certainly were not complaining, liking this sudden dominant side of the man.
The beta pulled down his own pants and underwear next, eager to have the constricting material off. There you both were, naked and breathing heavy in anticipation. Your eyes were locked in the mirror as Felix reached under both of you and his fingers found your bundle of nerves. You gasped when he touched the sensitive area, eyes closing only for a second. He could feel just how drenched you were for him.
It was at this point that Felix realized he did not have a condom in here.’ Are you fucking kidding me?’ he momentarily chastises himself. “Ummm baby?” you hummed in response, waiting in anticipation. “I sorta don’t have a condom…”
“Oh.” you froze. “Th-then we can, umm, maybe we should stop.”
“Do you want to stop?” He desperately did not want to, he literally didn’t know if he could at this point.
“N-no but Chan and the doctor said-”
“But I can pull out.” He eagerly proposed, he had never been a rule breaker but right now he really did not give a shit. Consequences be damned. “Come on omega, it’ll feel so good.”
“I don’t know, lix…” You trailed off, unsure. "Channie wouldn't like it.." You didn’t want to disobey but one look at his pleading face behind you and you gave in. “If you promise to pull out…”
“I promise,” he said immediately. You nodded hesitantly giving him the go ahead as you readied yourself against the counter once more. "God, you are so hot."
The beta placed a kiss to your neck before taking his member in his hand and lining up with your entrance. He hadn’t prepped you like he should have but honestly when you were both that desperate that was the farthest thing from his mind. He let the tip run through your slick that had accumulated to make it an easier entry. Felix slowly pushed into you from behind, the stretch of him leaving a slight burn and you lightly hissed at the intrusion.
Felix on the other hand was in heaven. He had never felt so incredible from one push but fuck you were so tight. “Fuck omega, your pussy is so tight, nnggg oh my god I don’t know how I'll be able to move, fuck baby.” Felix couldn’t shut up as he filled you. His words were helping you though, as he stopped moving to let you adjust while he mumbled.
Between his jumbled (what you assumed were) praising words he laid sloppy kisses to your bare shoulders, his saliva leaving wetness along your skin. You were absolutely reeling; between feeling him within you and his total personality flip that left you with whiplash, your brain was turning into a muddled mess. It got even worse when he started rutting into you from behind, his hips grinding harshly against your ass.
His chest pushed you further into the counter and with the new angle his cock hit something deep inside you. Your back arched as you moaned aloud, your head falling forward in your ecstasy.
“F-fuuckk baby, you are so good f’ me. So so good, oh my god.” his deep voice was getting raspier by the second. Felix reached his hand around, his small fingers finding your clit again and rubbing sloppy circles. His other hand went to your breast and massaged your sensitive skin. “Look at me, baby, please look at me.”
You mustered all your willpower to bring your head up as much as you could, looking through your wet lashes to his gaze in the mirror. He looked absolutely wrecked, his eyes glossed over as he drooled on you. At the sight of him, fucked out because of you, you felt your orgasm approaching and approaching fast. “F-felix ‘m gonna- gonna cum.”
“Please cum for me. I need you to cum for me.” He sped up his thrusts, humping into you desperately. He was close to. The pulsing of his dick within you sent you over the edge, and you came with a loud cry of his name.
The squeezing of your heat on his member was enough for him. The beta knew he wouldn’t be able to pull out in time but he still tried, cumming half inside and the rest on your ass. The second he came his urges took over completely and without a warning, his teeth embedded themselves in your shoulder blade. When his teeth made contact in your skin you moaned as another orgasm washed over you.
You both were panting hard, you with tears cascading down your cheeks and Felix with your blood on his lips. It took you a moment to catch both of your breaths, the severity of what had happened finally registering in both of your minds.
“Felix…”
“Yeah”
“You came in me.”
“Yeah”
“Do you think Chan will be mad?”
“Yep”
“Oh. Did you mean to bite me?”
“Um, n-no.” He stammered, “ It had been on my mind since a few days ago when Chan said we could.”
‘Chan had said that?’
“But I didn't really expect to.” He grabbed a towel and began to wipe up the dripping mess he made on your skin. “I guess now is a good time to tell you that I'm kinda in love with you.” he chuckled nervously.
You spun around at his confession, not really shocked. You were able to feel his emotions when he bit down on you. It wasn’t as intense as when Chan bit into you - given he is an alpha and he bit your mating gland - but you could still sense the betas to an extent. “Felix…” you let more salty tears trail down your face. “I…I kinda love you too.”
Now he was crying, unable to contain his emotions and he fell into your embrace. Both of you were just little crybabies. Maybe that is why you got on so well together. It was easy to be vulnerable with him.
It was easy with Felix. So you both just hugged, and whispered to each other there in the bathroom. Both dreading the storm that was your alpha.
Sometime later after you had both redressed and Felix cleaned the wound on your shoulder, you both exited the bathroom. You shared a final kiss before parting ways. Felix going down the stairs and you going into Chan's office. The guilt was going to eat you alive if you didn’t tell him (assuming he couldn’t smell it on you when you came in).
You heard more faint talking so you knocked and waited. You heard him thank whoever he was talking to and hang up. “Come on in, baby.” He called out to you. You opened his door slowly and saw him sitting at his desk. His nostrils flared when you entered his office.
Chan obviously knew what you were doing with Felix, but he didn’t know the dirty secret you were keeping. Upon your entry into his office you were emitting a scent you hadn’t produced in a few days; intense guilt.
“What’s wrong, omega?” He immediately questioned you, reaching his hands out for you. When he noticed your hesitancy to grab his hand he stood from his seat and rested his hands on your shoulders, bending to be eye level with you. “Did something happen? Did Felix do something to you?”
“No!” you answered quickly. “I mean, not really.”
“Then what's wrong? You can't keep secrets from me, I can smell it on you.”
You looked down to the floor shamefully before giving him an answer. “When Felix and I were..intimate, he sorta.. He didn’t wear anything… and he umm he kinda came in me a little bit..” Your heart was pounding out of your chest when you saw the hardened look in the alphas face, his eyes darkening at your admittance.
“Is that so?” He seemed eerily calm, if you knew anything about alphas it’s that they are prone to rage so the fact that he didn’t immediately lash out was kind of scary to you. Little did you know he was furious.
“I’m really sorry, Channie. I-i know i wasn’t supposed to but-”
“Go to our room.” He interrupted you, removing his hands from you.
“W-what?”
He let out a low growl, “Go. to. Our. room. Omega, now.”
You gave him a look of alarm at his menacing tone, but still scurried out of his office and to his room. You shut the door softly and then sat on the bed, awaiting your fate. You hadn’t seen Chan angry yet, you didn’t know what to expect. He didn’t strike you as the type to scream and throw things like your father had been, but to be fair you had only known him for just over a week.
After about ten minutes Chan walked through the door into the space you occupied. He still had that intimidating demeanor but he seemed to be keeping his cool. He skipped the formalities as he spoke to you though, “ Take off your clothes and get in the shower.”
You stood from your seated position and started to strip, gently placing your clothes down in the hamper before slowly making your way to the bathroom. The whole time he just watched you as if you were a prey animal, and he was the big bad wolf.
Once you turned on the water to his shower it only took a moment for it to get hot and you entered the shower. It was a spacious area, with sliding glass and a shower head that rained down from the ceiling. Any other time you would have found solace in the luxurious bathroom, but right now all you felt was anxious.
Chan didn’t say anything as he slipped into the shower with you a few moments later. In fact he hadn’t said anything at all as he helped you wash your hair, he only shushed you when you went to speak. It wasn’t until he grabbed a loofa and began rubbing down your body from behind with it that he spoke. “ This is a nice bite mark here on your shoulder. Did Felix do that to you?” You went to nod in response but that wasn’t what the alpha was looking for, and he used one hand to reach onto the base of your head and gripped your hair tightly, causing you to let out a squeak. “I asked you a question, omega, and I expect an answer.”
“Yes, yes Alpha he did.” You gasped out, falling quickly into an uncharted subspace. Your inner omega only wanted to please your alpha now. His actions and words were shocking to you, he wasn’t being the Chan you knew him to be. You had seen small glimpses here and there but never to this extent.
“Did he bite you while he was cumming inside of you?” His grip on your hair tightened in one hand while his other brought the loofa down between your legs.
“Yes alpha.” You tilted your head back trying to get some slack but it proved pointless.
“Do you remember the conversation we had with the doctor yesterday, omega?” He knew you did, or else you wouldn’t have come to him so guiltily.
“Yes I re-remember” You stuttered, your insides fluttering with both excitement and anxiety.
“What did he say to us about when having sex?” His lips were kissing your injured skin on your shoulder where your new bite mark resided.
“To-to use protection until my results come in and I can go on-on birth control.” your panting was getting stronger as you tried to forget about the pain on your scalp.
“Mm that is right, baby.” chans tongue dug into your injured skin, causing you to let out a quiet cry. “Ya know what the rule was and still deliberately did otherwise. What am I going to do with you?” It was a rhetorical question meant to tease you. You started to cry at his words.
“ m’ so sorry Alpha. Please don’t be angry. M’ sorry.” He leaned over to lick up the salty tears that were coming down steadily now.
“Oh baby, I know you're sorry. Alpha knows.” you perked up slightly but it all came crashing down when he said his next words, “But just because you're sorry doesn’t mean there are no consequences.”
He dropped the sponge to the ground and that hand grabbed both of your wrists holding them together behind your back and pushing you against the cold tile, your chest smushing against the wall. “Ahh Chan!”
“Spread your legs. Let me in there, omega.” you did as he said, and he wasted no time in rubbing the tip of his cock along your sensitive folds. “Funny enough, I had just talked to the doctor on the phone before you came into my office, stinking like guilt and cum.” The alpha pressed you harder against the tile. “And it turns out you wouldn’t even be able to get pregnant right now, those suppressants are running crazy all over your body and hormones.”
Without warning he pushed into your heat, your sore walls engulfing him completely. He was so big. Even though you had been prepped by Felix so recently, taking the alpha was a whole other ball game. The only time he had really fucked you was on your heat, where your body was ready to accommodate his length.
“R-really?” you asked in a moan, both in pleasure and pain.
“Uh huh. How lucky is that?” He started at a brutal pace, the skin of his pelvis slapping against your ass noisily. “Still doesn’t excuse your actions. The both of you have to make it up somehow.”
“Please, m’ sorry.” you pleaded between moans and squeaks. His cock always filled you so well.
“This bite mark he left you sure is deep. You know Felix would only bite someone he loves.” Your heart fluttered at his remark, and it seemed your pussy did too. “Fuck so tight. Did you know that, omega? Your pussy tightened on me so you must know. Felix loves you, and now I'm sure you love him too huh?”
“Yes alpha!” you cried louder as his wet heaving chest was pressed against your back.
“Maybe that should be your punishment. Yeah that's it, since both of you want to disobey me then that's the consequence.’ your eyes widened, having an inkling of what he would say next.
“You aren’t allowed to touch him, at all, until I say so. No kissing, no fucking, no so much as brushing fucking fingers with him until I've deemed it acceptable. Fuck maybe I won’t even let him speak to you from now on.”
“Alpha no!” You tried to protest but he only sped up his thrusts, making you only be able to moan and cry. Fuck he was fucking you so good. Better than anything you have ever felt. He had you so deep in space you could barely focus on anything than that thin line between pain and pleasure.
“Too fucking late. You stay the fuck away from him, do you hear me, omega? Damn, I'm gonna cum. He won’t so much as breathe in your direction until I say so.” The alpha let go of your hair and you sucked in a large breath at the release. He opted for gripping your hips roughly, his fingers surely to leave bruises.
Your arms were free now so with one hand you braced yourself against the cold surface, the other was reaching behind you to grab at your mate, craving even an ounce of comfort as you were nearing your high. You made contact with the skin on his waist and dug your fingers into him.
When you grabbed him the alpha let go and released inside of you with a loud growl, the copious amount overflowing against his length. His knot inflated within you, locking you into place with him. His growl set something inside of you aflame and without warning you came too, a loud wail leaving your lips and your eyes rolling into the back of your head. You wretch your head to the side bearing your neck for your alpha, giving him your complete submission. He almost took the opportunity to reclaim you, but knew you had enough biting for one day.
Chan stilled his hips, breathing heavy in your ears as he let you come down. He watched the cum fall down from where you were joined and be washed away with the water. After a moment when his knot had deflated, he slowly pulled out of you, kissing the back of your neck and whispering praises. He knew it would be a long night of aftercare.
A/n: True colors are starting to come out a lil more, not everything is all sunshine and rainbows
Comments and reblogs are very much appreciated!
Also if any one wants to chat about the story or share predictions please send me an ask!!
Beta read by my wonderful bumble bee @ayejaii
©doitforbangchan
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#stray kids#stray kids x reader#skz#skz smut#stray kids smut#straykids#stray kids ot8#bang chan#bang chan smut#bang chan x reader#christopher bang#abanb#lee know#lee minho x reader#changbin x reader#changbin#hyunjin#hyunjin x reader#han jisung#han jisung x reader#lee felix#lee felix x reader#felix x reader#stray kids felix#lee felix smut#felix smut#seungmin#seungmin x reader#jeongin#jeongin x reader
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scared to want you
for @steddie-week prompt 'exes to lovers'
rated m | 1021 words | cw: implied sexual content | tags: post breakup, getting back together, idiots in love, platonic stobin
❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
“Are you gonna stop staring at him anytime soon?” Robin’s voice asked loudly in his ear.
“Probably not,” Steve admitted. “He’s wearing my sweater.”
He saw Robin’s head whip around to look back at Eddie. “Holy shit.”
“Yeah.”
It’s surprising to see Eddie here at all, let alone in Steve’s sweater. Eddie had moved back in with Wayne three months ago after an argument with Steve that led whatever they were to destruction.
Steve wanted more, Eddie had been afraid. Steve said he loved him, Eddie said he needed to leave.
Steve spent the last three months hurting. Eddie was wearing his sweater in public.
Everything was a little confusing right now.
“We should go, Steve.” Robin sounded angry now, and Steve loved her for it. She’d been the one to show up at his door a few hours after Eddie was gone and held him while he cried. She’d been there for weeks while he avoided everyone’s questions, went through the motions of being an adult while barely getting by. She had blocked Eddie on all of his social media and her own out of spite. “It doesn’t do you any good to sit here and pine after someone who hurt you.”
She was right, of course, but he couldn’t leave.
Eddie was wearing his sweater.
Eddie looked good in his sweater.
“Steve.”
Steve turned to Robin, who was smiling sadly back at him.
“I don’t think I can go without talking to him.”
Robin nodded once, always so understanding of Steve, supportive even when he didn’t always deserve it. She was the best, and he was about to piss her off.
“I’ll text you when I leave,” he said as he gave her a quick hug. She wouldn’t want to stick around to see what happens with this. “I’ll be fine.”
He wouldn’t, and she knew that, but she squeezed his hand in hers and left anyway.
Eddie hadn’t noticed him yet, or at least wasn’t acting like he had. He was standing at the bar talking to the bartender and a woman who walked in only a few minutes ago. Whatever he was talking about seemed serious, none of them smiling.
Steve walked up to the bar slowly, but with the sole purpose of talking to Eddie.
The bartender turned to him and smiled. “Hey, hon. You need another Sunrise, Sunset?”
Steve shook his head, but smiled at her. “No thanks, Kim. Just here to say hi to someone.”
When he turned towards Eddie, he was already looking back at him, biting his lip nervously.
“Hey, Eds.”
“Hey, Stevie.”
“Been a bit,” Steve swallowed. He didn’t actually know what he was trying to accomplish here. All he knew was there had to be a reason he was wearing Steve’s sweater. It wasn’t exactly his usual style. “Doing alright?”
The other woman seemed to catch onto what was going on, turning away and talking to the bartender instead.
“Um, yeah I guess.” Eddie was lying. Steve could always tell when he was lying. “You?”
“Been better,” Steve replied. “A little surprised to see you here. In that.”
Eddie looked down at what he was wearing and then up at Steve, cheeks red with embarrassment. “Laundry day.”
“Sure.” Steve sighed, rubbing his hand down his face. He just had to say something. Maybe closure would be good. “Can we talk somewhere else?”
Eddie nodded and started to walk to the back of the bar where the office and bathrooms were. Steve followed, assuming they’d go into the bathroom and hope no one came in. When Eddie led him into the office, Steve frowned.
“I don’t think we have permission to be in here.”
“I work here part time. Kim lets me take my breaks in here,” Eddie explained, closing the door behind them. “I didn’t know you liked this bar.”
“We’ve only been a few times,” Steve explained.
“Oh, you’ve um. You and your date?” Eddie was leaning against the desk, eyes cast down to his feet.
“No. Me and Robin.”
Eddie let out a shaky breath. “Right, good, yeah.”
“Eddie, look at me.” Steve stepped closer, could almost feel the heat coming off of Eddie’s body. Eddie looked up at him, eyes watery and bottom lip bitten red. “Why are you wearing my sweater?”
“I needed you.” Eddie’s broken voice was all Steve needed to close what little distance remained between them, pulling Eddie against him and holding him as tightly as he possibly could.
“I didn’t think you needed me anymore,” Steve said against his neck, trying not to get his hopes up despite Eddie’s tears now soaking his shirt. “You didn’t want me anymore.”
Eddie’s hands tightened in Steve’s shirt and Steve felt him shake his head. “I wanted you too much. I was scared how much I wanted you.”
“Are you still scared now?”
“Only that I don’t have you.”
Steve’s lips found Eddie’s, hopeful and desperate.
Eddie took control within seconds, turning them around so Steve was sitting on the corner of the desk, legs spread so Eddie could fit between them. Where he belonged.
As Eddie’s hands pushed Steve’s shirt up and Steve’s legs pulled him in impossibly closer, the thought that they were still in a public place occurred to Steve.
He ignored it as Eddie’s thumb brushed against his nipple and his teeth bit his bottom lip.
“Want you now,” Eddie groaned against Steve’s neck. “Want you forever.”
“Lock the door.” Steve ordered.
Eddie locked the door.
****
When they left the office, hair disheveled and suspicious stains on their shirts, they were met with a knowing look from Kim.
Eddie rolled his eyes and pushed Steve out the door by the small of his back.
“Still living with Wayne?” Steve asked.
“Yeah. Could we go to yours?” Eddie asked hesitantly.
“Only if it can be ours.”
Eddie stopped him on the sidewalk, eyes blinking furiously. “You would want that? After I left?”
Steve smiled. “Are you gonna leave again or are you gonna let me love you?”
“You can still love me?”
“I couldn’t not love you.”
“Then let’s go to ours.”
#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#stranger things#steddieweek24#steddie week#exes to lovers#getting back together#idiots in love
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take as needed |bouncer!eddie munson x bartender!reader|
prompt: a hectic week at the hideout has you burnt out, fed up, and on the path of destruction. eddie is in your path, and tries to course correct.
contains: minors dni. smut. dom!eddie x sub!reader tones this time. soft!dom!eddie. emotional release spanking. masturbation male. angst, fighting, they're kinda mean to each other but ends in fluff. based off this blurb from a while ago.
"Behind you." Veronica held the beers over you, shimmying through the crowded back area towards her customers at the end of the bar.
It was way too busy for The Hideout- for Hawkins. College was out for the summertime, all the college kids that fled as fast as they could after graduation were dragged back for the summer. Most of them would rather be at some stuffy bar that with their families, and you couldn't blame them, so they found there way here. On a Friday night, slammed and the karaoke machine in full effect from nine til midnight. Thankfully, you got off at ten, only an hour of enduring the screeching off note wails of the drunken patrons.
"Great song choice, man. Super metal." You looked up to see Eddie, all black even in the summer heat, sliding behind the bar, fist bumping the drunk kid who'd belted Welcome to the Jungle complete with the filthy moans into the mic. It had made everyone laugh, hoot and yell out encouragements at him. Everyone but you, it just irritated you.
"Hey there, pretty girl." Eddie muttered, grabbing your waist while he slid past you. "When you get a chance, can you make me a drink, please?"
"I'm super busy right now, Ed." You huffed, fishing a pen out of your back pocket, setting it on the bar for the drunk sorority girl to sign.
"I know, baby," Eddie cooed, ringed hands rubbing down you arms gently. You knew the act was to soothe you, calm you down, but it did nothing to relax you, only pissing you off further. "Whenever you get a chance. 'm on my break. You need any help? Wha'dya need me to do? How can I help?"
"No." You grit, shoving the ice scoop into the clumped, melting ice with a rather hard shove. "Can you just get out from behind here? It's crowded enough, Ed. 'M boiling and you're in my way."
"Easy, ease up." Eddie frowned at you. "Just trying to see if you need any help."
"I'm fine." You slammed the glass down on the counter, Veronica's eyes cutting over towards you carefully. You'd been on edge all night, frustrated and annoyed from the moment you walked in, such a contrast to your usual very sweet and bubbly demeanor. The customers seemed to notice too, seeing as your tips were practically cut in half, even on a busy night.
You tilted the bottle up, not even bother to properly measure the amount of vodka you were dousing into the drink. Veronica raised her brows at Eddie, shaking her head gently. You pressed the lemonade tap before turning to him. "I'll make your drink if I have time."
"I got it." Veronica offered, pulling two glasses out. "What do you want, Ed-"
"-I can make it, Veronica." You sneered, jamming a straw in the drink and adding it to the tab. "Just gimme a goddam second."
"Hey," Eddie's eyes narrowed at you. "What's gotten into you? Take a fucking chill pill and relax."
"I am relaxed." You sneered, slamming the drink on the counter in front of the wide eyed girl. "You are pissing me off."
"Hey, the both of you," Ellen huffed from her place behind you. "Why don't you both go on your fifteen." She suggested. "Cool off, alright?"
Eddie didn't give you a chance to protest, wrapping his arm around your bicep lightly, dragging you back towards the kitchen. You grumbled the whole way, whining about your tips, scuffing your feet along the sticky tile, until Eddie pushed the back door open.
"...and fucking Veronica has been taking all the regulars tonight, and I get all these young fucks who don't tip. Fucking bitch, like, she knows that's not fair-"
"-What is your problem tonight?" Eddie frowned.
You blinked, a scoff leaving your lips. "Me? What's my problem? Are you- are you fucking serious?"
"Yeah. You're being mean tonight. What's going on?" Eddie's jaw clenched, teeth grinding together.
"Oh, fuck you, Eddie. I am not being fucking mean, you're such a-"
"Hey," His ringed hand caught your jaw easily, light but firm. "Enough of whatever you're pissed about, alright? You gotta get yourself together. You're being mean to everyone. Not a good look. Killing the vibe, babe."
Your lips pursed, shoving him off of you. "You're a fucking piece of shit, you know that?" You sneered, reaching for the handle of the door. "I'm killing the vibe- fuck you! I'll kill the vibe if I want to."
Eddie's hand smacked onto the door, shutting it before you opened it completely. "What has got you acting like this?" Eddie demanded. You shoved him again, reaching for the handle. "Hey, stop it. I'm being serious, alright? Did someone mess with you? You're supposed to tell me or Ellen. I'll take care of them you know I will. Won't let them mess with you. Just- Can you tell me what's going on with you. Why are you being so mean tonight?"
"You're so fucking annoying." You huffed. "Nothing it wrong with me. You're just pissing me off."
"Yeah? Well, you're pissin' me off, too." Eddie snapped. You faltered at his biting tone. "Pissing me off, and everybody else off with your horrible little attitude."
"I don't have an attitude." You mumbled.
Eddie scoffed. "Yeah fucking right. You've been awful all night, and honestly, I'm sick of it. So is everyone else, so you better stop it now. Alright?"
It was your turn to scoff, a heavy eye roll accompanied. "Yeah? Or what? Huh? What the fuck are you or anyone else gonna do huh? Send me home? Cut me? Please, be my fucking guest."
Eddie moved, pinning you to the door, hands on yours, closing around them firmly. "If you don't quit acting so bitchy and mean, then I'm gonna treat you mean. Give you a taste of your own medicine." Eddie growled, eyes pointed in a fiery glare that had your knees buckling.
"You got me? Keep this shitty little attitude up, and I'm gonna drag you to the back and give you an attitude adjustment. That what you want?"
Your heart jumped at the threat, tummy flipping and pooling with warmth. "Y-You're not going to-" Your voice shook, Eddie's challenging look cutting you off further.
"No? You sure? You really think I won't? Keep it up." Eddie snarled, letting your hands go. "I'm sure everyone would love to see you get put in your place after how awful you've been tonight."
You let out a shuddering breath, watching him reach for his reds, sifting through the pack, curls falling in front of his face. Eddie turned to you, cigarette around his lips. "What?" He asked, flicking the lighter. "You want one?"
Your nose scrunched, grabbing the door handle and yanking it open furiously. Eddie rolled his neck, inhaling deeply. It was going to be a long night.
Though your attitude subdued through most of the night, enough that at least you weren't so hateful outwardly, not slinging mean comments. Instead, you took to glaring, shooting daggers at Eddie. Thankfully, the bar died down enough for the two of you to go home in time, Ellen giving Eddie a wary look over your head while you wrote your time.
"Fuckin' asshole." You sneered, sifting through the wadded bills, flicking the cash into the drawer.
"What's wrong?" Ellen asked, passing the check to the group of girls across the bar.
"That jackass only tipped a dollar." You grit, tucking the singular bill into your bra. "Six beers and four shots, and he tips a dollar? What a piece of shit."
Ellen's lips pursed. "Well, maybe if you were nicer-"
"-I was nice." You snapped defensively.
Eddie's shoulders tensed at your tone, even from his place by the door he could hear it, much clearer now that the place had started to clear out.
Ellen's brow raised, looking at you then to Eddie. He could feel his face flush, mortified at your attitude. "You know what? It's died down, and you..." Ellen shook her head. "Veronica and I can close up tonight. You can go home early."
You scoffed, dumping the glasses into the tray. "I don't have a ride. I came with Eddie. It's fine, I'll start the-"
"-No, Ed!" Ellen waved him over. "You two go home early, alright? Last calls in an hour, it's dying down. We got it."
Eddie wanted to die, melt into the floor. He felt like he was in grade school again, getting in trouble because someone was talking to him, grouped in with the trouble when he was innocent.
You didn't argue, huffing when you split the tips in the jar, stomping away towards the back. "Ellen, hey, I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with her tonight. I think she's just in a bad mood-"
"-That's an understatement, Munson." Ellen grumbled, eyes rolling. "Did you two fight or something on the way here?"
"No, we didn't-"
"-Because I'm glad you two are together. I think you're real cute, but if it's going to effect your work like this. I'll have to stop scheduling you two together." Ellen gave him a pointed look. "And that's really gonna be a pain in my ass."
Eddie swallowed, hands buzzing, twisting his rings nervously. "No, I get that. It won't- You don't need to do that. I'll get it under control. This was just a one time thing. She's just having a bad day."
Ellen held his gaze, a stern glare that had Eddie's heart picking up, cheeks burning with embarrassment. "I hope so. I'm choosing to believe you because I agree, that," Ellen waved towards the back where you were no doubt sulking. "Is out of character."
Eddie nodded, muttering a sigh filled apology. Ellen waved him off. "Hey just make sure you two are good on Tuesday, alright? We'll start fresh. Have a good weekend."
"You too. And you, Veronica, thank you." Eddie waved, pushing the swinging doors towards the back.
He found you next to the lockers, arms crossed and leaning against the wall, foot tapping in annoyance. "What took you so long?" You snapped.
Eddie flinched, blinking back at you in disbelief. "What?"
"I've been waiting. It took you forever." You huffed. "You usually run out of here and tonight, when I'm already in a bad mood, you take forever? Are you just trying to piss me off?"
"Are you?" Eddie snapped. Your eyes widened, face falling at his tone, furious, annoyed.
"What?" You swallowed.
Eddie shook his head at you, grabbing the lock on his locker, spinning the combination. "You're..." Eddie scoffed lightly.
"What? I'm what?" You clicked your tongue in annoyance.
"You're being a real asshole tonight." Eddie looked over his shoulder at you. "Embarrassing, acting like this. Getting sent home early? How are you not embarrassed?"
Heat filled your chest, heavy and suffocating, different that the bubbling rage from before. "I thought you'd be ready to crawl in a hole after Ellen sent you home." Eddie flung the metal door open, letting it hit the others with a loud clank! that had you flinching.
"Then you get me sent home too, and you've got the fucking audacity to be mean? To talk to me like that?" Eddie glared at you over his shoulder. Your frame shrunk, heart pounding in your ears. It was the most subdued you'd been all night.
"I-I didn't get you sent home-"
"-The fuck you didn't." Eddie scoffed, grabbing his keys, his wallet out of the locker, smacking it shut. "You wanna know what was taking to long? I was talking to Ellen. She was telling me if we can't keep our personal life out of work, we can't work together. I was trying to tell her that we didn't get into a fight, and she didn't believe me."
Eddie took a step towards you, time card in hand. "She couldn't believe you were just mean like that unprovoked." Eddie shoved the card in the clock. "So what? You mad at me? Is that what's going on?"
"No." You muttered, looking down at your beat up sneakers, covered with sticky stains from the night.
"So what then? Care to tell me what's wrong? I mean, shit, we're getting sent home now. Feel like you should let me in on what's goin' on." Eddie threw his hands up, keys rattling between his fingers.
"Nothing's wrong-" You sneered, barely registering the ringed hand that caught your chin. Fingers squeezing your cheek in a firm grasp, pulling your gaze to Eddie's.
His eyes lidded, nostrils flaring down at you. "You better watch it." Eddie gritted. "Keep this shit up, and I'll lock that door and fix that attitude in here."
Your tummy flipped, swallowing thickly around the lump in your throat. Agitation fizzled into arousal at the threat. You cursed yourself for feeling that way.
Eddie's eyes squinted, head tipping towards yours slightly. "That what you want?" He huffed, hand still firm on your cheeks. "You acted like this because you wanted me to be mean to you-"
"-No." You sneered, wiggling in his grasp, scared he could feel your cheeks burning with embarrassment. "That's not why."
"So tell me why." Eddie's hand loosened, eyes still pinning you with his gaze. "Tell me what's goin' on."
Your chest sunk with a heavy guilt. Burnt out from tireless hours of work, cranky from lack of sleep, annoyed that Ellen let Pat off for the week when the place had never been busier. All of it eating away at you throughout the week until you finally snapped.
"I just wanna go home." Your tone was softer than before, still teetering on huffy. "I don't want to be in this place for another second. I'm so sick of being here."
Eddie nodded, tongue sliding over his teeth. Keys clenched in his hand, he stayed silent. The car ride uncomfortable silent, neither of you speaking first, the hum of the radio the only refuge.
"You gonna tell me what's going on?" Eddie broke the silence after nearly an hour. The two of you had gotten back to his trailer, going your separate ways to cool down. He finished a cigarette on the steps, let you do whatever you needed to inside.
He found you by the sink, scrubbing your makeup off. Mascara and eyeliner smeared down your lids, normally, he'd laugh. Squeeze your sides and tell you how metal you looked, silly and playful until you were giggling with him.
Not tonight.
A part of you wished he would have. It would have made you feel better.
That gnawing feeling of uncomfortableness was eating you alive from the inside out. Had your chest feeling tight, skin crawling with irritation. It had only grown worse, now that you were left to reflect on the night- on how you acted.
Eddie moved into the mirror behind you, pulling his shirt off, tossing it in the hamper. You brought the wash cloth back to your face, cleaning the smeared makeup from under your eyes.
Eddie's shoulders slumped. "C'mon." He sighed, softer this time. "What's wrong, baby?" His hands slid over your arms, pressing a small kiss to your shoulder. "Tell me what's goin' on. I know something's wrong."
Your nose burned, pressing the warm washcloth to it. "I don't know." You muttered, opening the mirror, plucking the faded lilac case from the shelf.
"I just... I don't know." Your eyes rounded, locking with Eddie's through the mirror. "I just- I don't know how to describe it. I just feel off?"
Eddie nodded slowly, hands resting on your back gently. "Off, how?" Eddie hummed, arms wrapping around your body, pulling you into him. You didn't fight him, melting into his embrace instead. "Tell me what's wrong, honey. I just want you to feel better."
Your head tilted back to his chest, his arms heavy over your frame. "Just off." You muttered. "I feel like I need to just get everything out. Hit the reset button because I'm just so- so, bleh."
Eddie's lips curled gently, swaying you lightly in his arms. "I just am, like, unsettled. I'm so tired from work, but then I get home and I can't sleep, and then people are so fuckin' rude-"
"-Who's rude to you?" Eddie pressed, frowning behind you.
"Just the kids." You roll your eyes, shoulders tensing. "Snotty college kids. They think they're better than you or something."
"So come get me when they do that." Eddie's chin hooked over your shoulder lightly. "I'll take care of them. Kick 'em out."
"Then we'd have nobody." You shook your head lightly. "It's just- I don't know. I just feel really off." You paused, craning your neck to look at Eddie. "I feel like I need to get it all out."
Eddie stilled. "You-You want me to help you with that?" He knew what you were asking. "You want me to... To spank you?" It wasn't the first time you'd done this, still his cheeks burned at the word.
Your sex life was far from vanilla, teetering on outright debaucherous at times. He was no stranger to being mean to you in the bedroom, just like you weren't to him. Still, when you'd asked him the first time, to give you emotional release in this way, it felt a little odd to him at times. To bring pain to you, even if you asked, when all he wanted to do was smother you with affection.
Still, he'd do anything for you. You knew that, he did too.
It was why he swayed so easily. Your eyes rounding, lashes batting so sweetly up at him. "It really would help me feel better." His heart skipped, a sweet tone he'd been longing for all night. "I really think it would help."
Eddie nodded, hands sliding down your arms again, squeezing your elbows gently. You picked the hairbrush off the counter, handing it to him, taking his free hand and guiding him to the bedroom.
He let you settle over his lap, wiggling until you felt comfortable, a pillow under your face. Eddie twirled the hair brush in his hand, fidgeting while you settled. It was still new. How hard did he hit in this scenario? Did he soothe you? Scold you? Say anything at all? When you were playing, it was easier. In a headspace that came naturally with the moment.
"Ok," You hummed, turning to look at him, cheek pressed to the pillow. "'m ready."
Eddie hesitated. "You- And you're gonna tell me, right? When you want me to stop?"
"Yes." You nodded gently. "Just don't stop until I'm crying."
Eddie's cock throbbed, a roller coaster like drop in his stomach at your words. "Baby, I'm serious-"
"-I am too." You frowned. "Eddie, I promise I will tell you if it's too much, but... just please? Until I'm crying then you can stop."
"O-Ok," Eddie's breath stuttered, hand smoothing over your pantie clad ass, cheeky cotton panties that had his brain trailing off. "I'm gonna, I'm starting."
You settled back into the pillow, Eddie's hand rubbing down your back soothingly. Your free hand snaked up, folding over the middle of your back, fingers wiggling at Eddie's. A sweet gesture that made his heart swell, interlocking his fingers with yours, pinning your hand gently to your back.
The hair brush's smooth wood pressed to your ass, tapping in a warning that had your hips clenching lightly. Eddie hesitated, bringing the hairbrush up, then lower, readjusting his aim, before letting it fall. A soft clap met with a tiny grunt from you.
"You can do harder than that, Ed." You muttered.
"Harder? Are you sure?" Eddie hoped you couldn't feel his heart beating. "I don't wanna hurt you when you're not feeling good, baby."
"You're not hurting me. You're helping me. I swear." You said softly, squeezing his hand gently, reassuringly. "You can do harder than that. I'll let you know if it's too much."
Eddie brought the hairbrush higher, sending it soaring down with a firm smack that had your breath hitching. He waited, your hips squirming in his lap.
"That was good. Just like that, Ed." You whispered, taking a deep breath in through the burn in your nose.
Two identical hits fell to each of your cheeks, a tiny squeak of a cry coming from you. Your grip tightening against his hand with every fall of the hairbrush. Eddie was more confident, fell into a rhythm that felt more comfortable.
Hips wiggling, tiny whimpers and cries coming from you, rotating from cheek to cheek, lower then higher. Eddie brought the hairbrush down, a flick in his wrist that was sharper, stinging against your skin.
A tiny hitch, a sniffle that sounded watery had his ears perking. Eddie paused, feeling the hitch in your chest. "Keep going." You gritted, a white knuckled grip around his hand. "Keep going, Ed. Please."
Eddie brought the hair brush down again, twice, sharp flicks that had you crying out- a real cry, broken and breathy. Unsure, Eddie shushed you sweetly, letting the hair brush fall onto your upturned ass again.
"Shh, it's alright. You're doin' good, sweetheart. Let it out." Eddie rasped, cracking the hairbrush down again. "Doin' good for me."
The next fall of the hairbrush had a cry breaking though your throat, tears springing in your waterline, threatening to fall. The bubble in your chest filling fuller and fuller, close to bursting with the building irritation on your ass.
"You're doin' good. I know you've got to be feeling better." Eddie soothed. "You still good? Need me to stop."
"No," You cried, shaking your head. "K-Keep going, Eddie, please, keep going. D-Do it fast. Fast ones."
Eddie let the hair bursh rain down in quick successions, all over your ass, sharp smacks that had you gritting your teeth in irritation, eyes clenching shut until finally, you felt a wave wash over you. Heavy with emotions, it crashed into you, body shaking in sobs.
Face pressed into the pillow, you cried into the soft cotton, rubbing your face against the pillow case to soothe yourself. Eddie slowed, stopping when your hand loosened in his, body slack and shaking with sobs.
Eddie held you, arms tight around you though it felt like it was more for him. Soft coos and whispers, a hand rubbing down your spine. He hoped you couldn't feel his erection pressing into you. He felt torn, arousal he couldn't help but felt wrong when you were crying. Sobs so deep, stuttering in your chest and rocking your frame.
He hadn't realized how exhausted you were, a pang of guilt ringing through his chest when you started to slump in his arms. Usually, he'd get you calmed down, finish off the night between your legs, to make you feel better or maybe him.
Tonight, he let you settling into the mattress, rolling you onto your side, tucking the pillow under your knees, how you always slept. He wasn't sure how it was comfortable, teased you about it the first time he saw it. "It helps with my back, I swear." You had giggled, hiking a leg up over the pillow and settling into the mattress. Eddie didn't care how you slept, honestly, if it meant you'd sleep next to him.
Settling you under the blankets, Eddie carried the hair brush back into the bathroom, setting it back on the vanity's counter. He pulled the Jergens off the shelf, hand wrapping around his length, relieving himself. Tomorrow, he'd take care of you, spend the day in bed with you if you wanted, hopeful but certain that you'd be better in the morning.
#oneforthemunny#munnytalks#bouncer!eddie#bouncer!eddie munson#bouncer!eddie munson x bartender!reader#bouncer!eddie munson moodboard#eddie munson x fem!reader smut#eddie munson x reader smut#eddie munson smut#eddie munson au#eddie munson au#soft dom!eddie munson#dom!eddie#dom!eddie munson x reader#dom!eddie munson#eddie x fem!reader#eddie stranger things#eddie my love <3#eddie x reader#eddie munson#eddie munson x fem!reader#eddie munson x female reader#eddie munson x fem!reader fluff#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson fluff#stranger things#stranger things 4#eddie munson fic#eddie munson x you#the hideout
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@steddieangstyaugust Day 18: Right Person, Wrong Time
"And then these big birds come and rescue them!" Eddie splays out his arms like wings.
"That's so cool! Then what happened?" Steve asked eyes wide.
Eddie shrugged, "Not sure yet, councillor said I had to go to sleep. I'll tell you tomorrow though don't worry."
Summer camp had been the best summer ever in Eddie's opinion, and meeting Steve had made it even better. They had been inseparable even if they'd been assigned different cabins.
"Will you write me letters when summer is over? I don't want to miss any of the story," Steve said poking the fire.
"Of course I will, you'll be sick of seeing my name in your mailbox. Will you write to me too?"
"Of course, best friends forever right?"
"Forever, Stevie."
Scrawny handwriting on scraps of paper passed between the boys hands on the last day of camp. They were so excited to get home to send their first letter.
What they didn't know was that over summer Al Munson had been sent to jail, and with his mother gone it was Wayne that would pick him up from camp. Eddie's little home in Tawny Brooks was now on the road with Wayne until they could settle down somewhere. He held onto that paper like a lifeline.
In the meantime Steve was writing his first letter, begging his mother for a stamp and excitedly dropping it in the mailbox at the post office. It came back a couple weeks later with the words "Return to Sender". He shoved it into his desk, hurt, but hoped Eddie's letter would come soon, maybe he'd written his address wrong.
It was Steve who had written his address wrong though, dancing letters that made things hard to read changed the w in Hawkins to an m. Eddie didn't stand a chance when he dropped his letter in the box explaining he would send his address as soon as he was able. When he landed in a trailer in a small town called Hawkins the possible mix up didn't even cross his mind. He joked that Hawkins and Hamkins should be closer so they could see each other again not knowing Steve was only a short drive uptown.
Both boys ended summer hurt the other never replied. By the time their ages aligned with the same school they were different. How could Steve know that the boy with long curly hair who jumped on tables was the same Eddie with a buzzcut who told him about magical worlds? How could Eddie relate his Steve who had sun bleached highlights and who loved listening to Eddie talk to being the same named asshole who wandered the halls of Hawkins High? No, their friend was somewhere else in Indiana, lost forever.
"The shire is burning, so Mordor it is."
Mordor? Steve had heard that word before.
"That's Lord of the Rings, right?" Steve asked as they made their way to the Lake.
"Steeeeve Harrington knows Lord of the Rings?" Eddie asked in return, confusion written on his face.
"Yeah, um, this kid in summer camp used to tell it to me, I wasn't very good at reading, still aren't."
Eddie stumbled on his step, eyes meeting Steve's properly now, "Stevie?"
"Forever, Stevie."
"Eds? You've been in Hawkins this whole time, you're my Eddie!? You never wrote to me!"
"Stevie, sweetheart, you spelt it Hamkins. And sorry I didn't think King Steve was the same Steve that listened to me talking about hobbits."
"You moved, didn't you."
"Wayne picked me up, would've never gotten your letter."
"It's in my desk."
"Still?"
Steve nodded.
"I'd love to read it when this is all over, Stevie."
"If you promise you'll tell me how the story ends? I hope it's a happy ending."
"I hope so too, sweetheart, I hope so too."
#stranger things#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie#angst#sobbing sunday#right person wrong time#steddieangstyaugust#open ending#i do like to think eddie survives and they cuddle and read lotr together tho dw
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continuing my read of Anne Lister's diaries, now up to 1820 (part 1 here).
It has to be incredibly awkward at these houseparties where Anne has had liaisons with multiple women there, but I'm given to understand this is also how modern lesbian socializing works
It gets brought up that the only thing preventing Anne and Mariana from living together (at least in retrospect) was money, with Anne needing to be able to provide ~30 pounds a year for Mariana, which sheds a new light on how focused Anne is on her financials and potential inheritance
Class keeps coming up! Mariana would be okayish with Anne having a lowerclass girl on the side, but not someone in their social circles
Notably Anne did not encode this passage: "Sat up lovemaking, she conjuring me to be faithful, to consider myself as married, & always to act to other women as if I was M---'s husband." And from then on she does! They talk it over a bit more through the next few days, and from then Anne focuses on how in time they may live together, and refers to Mariana as her wife
Mariana's later letters also reflect this: "I shall not lose you, my husband, shall I? Oh, no, no. You will not, cannot, forget I am your constant, faithful, your affectionate wife."
It is noted again that Anne has a gentleman's manners towards other women, and there's a bit where a woman stops to visit Mariana and says that other girls are scared of Anne, particularly citing her "deep-toned voice as very singular"
"Yet my manners are certainly peculiar, not at all masculine but rather softly gentleman-like. I know how to please girls." No one every accused Anne Lister of lacking self-confidence! Also, interesting to see the Takarazuka-style butch ethos of "woman who is better at being a man then men are" already present here.
"Musing on the subject of being my own master. Of going to Buxton in my own carriage with a man & a maidservant. Meeting with a elegant girl of family & fortune; paying her attention;taking her to see Castleton; staying all night; having a double bedroom; gaining her affections, etc. Mused on all this but did not let it lead to anything worse."
one of Anne's acquaintances mentions a local cook/housekeeper, Mrs Ruspin, who after several years "turn[ed] out to be a man", and then eloped to London with the housemaid and opened a shop
The most common word in this book is probably vulgar. Anne thinks everyone is vulgar: her neighbors, her family, random townsfolk, girls she's flirting with...
We now come to the house party from sitcom-hell: present are Anne Lister, Isabella (her longterm ex who she's trying to extricate herself from), Isabella's sister Charlotte, Nantz (the sister of Anne's wife, who Anne had a brief fling with), Nantz's sister Harriet, and Miss Vallance (new and pretty).
I truly cannot summarize the amount of fuckery going on in this section. Anne spends every evening hanging out for a bit in someone's bedroom, then she'll switch rooms and whoever the new room belongs too will pout about her having been somewhere else beforehand. Anne is paying a lot of attention to Miss Vallance, Isabella and Nantz are jealous, Anne is trying to console Isabella without changing any of her behavior, Charlotte is indignant on Isabella's behalf, Anne is half-heartedly and smugly sleeping with Nantz, etc
And of course Anne caps this off by starting to flirt with Harriet, meaning that she has now hit on all four of her wife's sisters
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I should hate you was so good I feel like screaming omg I am OBSESSED WITH YOUR FICS !!!'!!!!
THE MORNING AFTER
anon, it's your lucky day!!! im a total idiot that forgot to include the morning after scene...so here ya go!!! if you want to read part one, check it out here <3
steve harrington x fem!reader
warnings: enemies to lovers, cursing, mentions of sex, overall fluff and humor hehehe
summary: eddie and jonathan catch you and steve in a pretty awkward position, too bad they saw it coming and all they really want to do is figure out who's the winner of their stupid little bet -- you and steve just want to take each other in...and steve wants to hear you call him 'baby' again and again.
The sun had risen nearly an hour ago, the cold air just barely dissipating with the warmth of the present rays, but the sun wasn’t the only one greeting you with good morning. Jonathan and Eddie remained outside Steve’s tent, ogling at the sight of you and Steve laying not just in the same vicinity, but literally in each other’s arms.
“They didn’t sleep together, Ed—” Jonathan attempted to reason, getting cut short by Eddie of course.
The metal head tsked his tongue noisily, glaring, “How’re you gonna say that when she’s wearing his t-shirt and her shorts are over there in the corner?” He pointed to the garments that looked to be thrown around in a haste.
A sexual haste, that is.
Jonathan shrugged, swallowing thickly, “M-maybe she got cold and–”
“You’re telling me someone who got cold in the middle of the night just decided to put on a big ole t-shirt but completely strip off her pants?” Eddie cackled loudly, nudging his shoulder, “Now you’ve got to either be the stupidest—”
Steve roused awake, eyes stretching themselves open to figure out that the hell all the bickering was about especially so early in the morning. It only took him a few seconds to realize that his tent was unzipped, his two friends staring at him like nothing strange was going on.
“What the fuck, guys!” Steve broke before immediately sealing his mouth shut, realizing that you were still fast asleep beside him, literally clinging to his torso.
Jonathan waved him off, gesturing out to calm Steve down, “Chill dude, your dick isn’t out or anything, but even if it was, it’s nothing we haven’t seen before.”
Eddie smirked, eyes flashing to your figure that was only half covered with the blanket due to your tossing and turning during the night.
“We can however see her ass cheeks hanging ou—”
Steve’s eyes grew, drawing down to your body that had kicked off some of the blanket during your sleep. The lace of your underwear peeking out along with some skin that was only supposed to be for Steve’s eyes. He quickly draped most of the blanket over the exposed skin, hoping they didn’t see too much of you.
“Get the fuck out!” He hissed sharply, pointing at his friends hoping they would just listen to him for once.
But alas, the commotion had interrupted your dream, groaning as you rubbed at your eyes and wiggled under the covers.
“What’s going on?” You mumbled before yawning out.
“Good morning!” Eddie started enthusiastically, clapping his hands together to fully get you awake and then Jonathan spoke up.
“Mind telling us if you guys just ended up making out last night or if you went all the way, cause we kinda made a bet and now we need to figure out who owes who what.”
Your eyes widened, neck snapping up at them as Steve whispered a curt apology that fell on your deaf ears. The last thing you wanted was for any of your friends to find you this way, not that it was embarrassing to be seen in such a state with Steve… you just didn’t want them to find out like this.
Obviously, that plan failed horribly.
“You guys clearly lack personal space and privacy don’t you?” You glared, pulling the covers up to your collarbones attempting to hide like that would make them forget the scene in front of them.
Eddie beamed like a prick he was crossing his arms over his chest. “Just answer the question, sweetheart.”
“Here’s my answer… fuck off!” You flipped them the bird, having enough of their teasing as you stretched up to push them away and zip the tent shut before you fell back into the pillow.
Steve couldn’t help but snort, shaking his head at the voices that quieted in the distance, his two friends still arguing over the stupid bet.
“I think you found two new people to take your anger out on,” Steve snickered, folding his arms across your hips and nuzzling his face into your neck.
You sighed, craning your neck out to give Steve more room to place random kisses across your skin, something you didn’t know you were missing out on for so long. For your first morning waking up beside Steve, he sure did know how to make you want more.
“Jonathans too nice and Eddie’s just an idiot sometimes.” You answered with the roll of your eyes that he didn’t see.
“So am I still your most hated?” He teased, poking at your ribcage making your jolt and you smacked his chest.
He came out of hiding, head tilting up at you to hear your answer. “You should be…” you bit your lip, “but I’m afraid you’re actually gonna be my new favorite.”
“Already?” He wiggled his brows with a smirk, shoulders shimmying under the covers in some sort of lame victory dance.
“Don’t flatter yourself, Harrington.” You retorted, poking his cheek.
He pouted, taking your hand in his, “No c’mon, call me that other name…” He insisted, or more like whined, kissing your knuckles with a self indulgent smile on his face.
“Baby,” you murmured, giving into him with the smile gently taking over your features, “Don’t flatter yourself, baby.”
He grinned, holding your cheeks in his palms, kissing you softly, “I’ll try not to. No promises, though.”
💌 reblogs, tags, comments, + likes are greatly appreciated! leave a comment and let me know if want to be added to my taglist!! 💌
a/n: it is so like me to forget to paste this scene into the actual fic 😭 thankfully it all worked out and posting it as a blurb is actually a pretty good idea since i want to expand on steve and reader hehehe. im thinking of opening up my request for some blurbs with these two because writing for them is so fun!!! let me know what you think and thank you so much for all the love and support 💫🩷
taglist: @translatemunson @kennedy-brooke @manda-panda-monium @tvserie-s-world @givemeth @steveharringtonswife @the-alchemys @loving-and-dreaming @awkotaco24 @engenelxver @elfiaaaa @pbs-theundeadmaggot @johnricharddeacy @gaysludge @keerysfolklore @micheledawn1975 @ihatepeanutss @bakugouswh0r3
#munsonsreputation#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington fic#steve harrington fluff#steve harrington blurb#steve harrington smut#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x you#steve harrington x fem!reader#steve harrington#steve harrington fanfiction#steve harrington drabble#steve harrington stranger things#stranger things imagines#stranger things imagine#stranger things
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Married au with Rockstar!Eddie where he's just a man STARVED when he goes home from tour. LIKEEEE, he's just a needy husband in need of reader's loving and he's been lacking just that for months now ☹️☹️☹️ (please the Eddie brainrot is consuming my every being.)
☆ The Crawl ☆
rockstar!eddie munson x housewife!afab!reader
CW: 18+ obvs, needy, pathetic sub eddie, dom-ish afab reader, dick riding, cum eating, dirty talkin’ nasty goodness, eddie literally crawling towards us 🫠🫠, facial, implied unprotected p in v sex, dribbler!eddie
author's note: this is my first time writing sub!dribbler!eddie hehehe eds is usually a dom!shooter in my universe. i hope you all enjoy!!! 💌
WC: 686 words
“Need you to have your way with me, sweetheart…need you to use me…Can’t take it anymore. Please."
You meet your husband's desperate gaze as he brushes his stiff cock against your thighs, prodding you for the sensual loving you had promised him when he was to come back from tour.
Craving every inch of your touch, the man is at your mercy. And that damn polaroid picture you sent him a few days ago? The damn polaroid of that pretty pussy of yours, your glistening folds spread apart by your perfectly manicured fingers, the white border holding space for the title, “all for you” signed by your rouge red lipstick? Eddie damn near kicked the tour bus driver out his seat to turn the vehicle back around himself.
But, of course, the show had to go on. And as stoked as Eddie was for Corroded Coffin's Rise of Kas Tour, nothing compares to being with you, wrapped up in your intimacy in the comfort of the home you two share.
And now 385 days later, you two are here.
“Need you to ride me dry…” he pleads. “Need both lips on my cock baby, he’s missed you so much…”
“Nuh uh,” you smirk, enjoying yourself just a little. “Not gonna do away with the flatteries just yet.”
“Fucking please, princess,” Eddie begs. “Been blue-balled all tour, you can’t do this to me.”
“Oh but I can.”
Hellbent and greedy, your smitten, pussy starved husband treads hopelessly towards you on all fours as you guide him to the bedroom.
Too many press photos and interviews. Too many groupies lining up outside the tour bus to claim their spots with Gareth, Grant, and Jeff. And far too many titties to sign, but Eddie knows he shouldn’t refuse, cuz since he built his brand off being a sex-crazed rockstar, rejecting the ladies would mark the end of his — very successful — career.
Too much of tour life on repeat. And never enough of you. And when he finally gets you, the whining only seems to intensify.
Your twinkling, cum-coated tits bounce in Eddie's face as you frantically taunt your clit with his wide, veiny cock. The sight of you tossing your head back, a mewling mess as he splits you open is enough to tug orgasms out of Eddie’s blissfully aching body. And as you clench around him, screams getting louder by the pump, his spewing tip begins to twitch with every jab into your guts.
“Oh baby…shit, mmfuck, ��m so fucking sensitive baby, you have no idea.”
Your excitement pools at the base of his naval. Knowing he's not going to last all that long, Eddie whimpers at the sight, his photographic conscious saving the episodic eye-sore for a midday work flashback.
“I love you so much,” he moans. Your orgasm begins to splash around him with every bounce. "Missed your beautiful face. Missed your tight fucking pussy."
“I love you, sweet boy,” you hum. “Your dick makes me feel so good, Eddie, fuck. You’re not going anywhere.”
Eddie releases one strained groan before he loses control. Now completely shifting the roles, Eddie pins you into place as he probes for his finish, thrusting into you as the sweat rushes down his body, his full sack beating at your skin as you ride out your last together.
“Fuck baby, yes baby, yes baby,” he pants. “Gonna be the death of me baby, oh fuck…”
And before he completely empties himself in you, Eddie retreats and finishes on your face. He beams down at you in awe as he glazes the hollows of your cheeks, glosses your lips, and caters to the tip of your cum-quenched tongue. Eddie then swoops down to collect his own eager laps, before thanking you with a kiss.
And, to your surprise, when all is said and done, and you’re all wiped down with a nice warm washcloth from the dryer, your husband books it to his office as if there were something else waiting for him behind that door.
“Eds,” you wonder. “What are you doing?”
“I need to write a song.”
#maddy’s requests 🍸#maddy’s mailbox ✨#rockstar!eddie#rockstar!eddie munson#eddie munson smut#eddie munson drabble#eddie munson one shot#eddie munson#eddie munson x reader#eddie munson x fem reader#eddie munson x you
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First Cuts
Part 1 | Part 2
“Hey,” Steve says breathlessly. “Y’know that thing that we are not mentioning, ever, on pain of death?”
Eddie blinks. “Y’know you’re still mentioning it even if you don’t call it what it is, right?”
“Eddie,” Steve says seriously, which causes Eddie to focus. “I need your help. I’m kinda freaking out, here.”
“Okay,” Eddie says, running through things in his mind. “Want me to come over? Or wanna come over here? Or just over the phone?”
“I’m stressed out enough I can’t make any decisions right now,” Steve says.
“Okay,” Eddie says, “then I’m coming over. Unlock the door for me, ‘kay? I’ll be there in ten.”
“M’kay. Thank you.” With a click he’s gone, and Eddie hangs his phone back up too, looking around for his keys.
He snatches them off the counter, jams his feet into his shoes, and takes off.
He realizes halfway there that he’s still in his pajamas.
He walks in when he arrives to find Steve sitting at the table, staring at an envelope like he’s trying to disintegrate it with just his vision. Eddie thinks he can almost see the paper smoking. “Hey,” he says softly. “What’s going on?”
Steve doesn’t meet his eyes, just keeps his gaze locked on the envelope. “I did something impulsive. And Robin doesn’t know. And either nothing changes, or everything does.” He lifts his face to Eddie’s. His bottom lip is bitten raw.
“Okay,” Eddie says. “Well, first things first is to figure out which of those options it is, right? I’m assuming the letter will determine which it is.”
“Yeah,” Steve says, reaching for it, only to push it towards Eddie. “I, uh. I applied to a specific school. And I know the kids are going to tease me about it-”
“Hey,” Eddie interrupts, brows furrowed. “You’re plenty smart, Stevie, don’t listen to the little shitheads, alright? Whatever the answer is, whatever you decide to do, I’m with you. One hundred percent. I’ll even punish the little twerps during our next session if they say anything, okay?”
“Can you open it?” Steve begs, whispering, eyes wide.
Eddie’s hopeless to refuse. “Of course I can,” he replies, just as softly.
He looks at the envelope. Good, thick paper. Sticker return address. He opens it and pulls out a letter.
Dear Steven J. Harrington,
We are pleased to inform you that you have been chosen for 1988’s starting class! In Tricoci University, we pride ourselves on…
Eddie looks up at Steve with a grin. “You’re in.”
“Holy shit,” Steve breathes. “Holy shit!” He begins to grin. “I made it!”
“You made it!” Eddie celebrates, then keeps reading.
We hope you look forward to your time here at Tricoci University of Beauty Culture Bloomington.
Eddie looks up at Steve again. “A beauty school?”
Steve flushes scarlet. “Cosmetology. I wanna do hair.”
Eddie sits for a minute, thinking, before he grins at Steve and stands to sweep him into a spinning hug. “That sounds perfect for you!”
Steve giggles giddily, then grins happily at Eddie when he’s set down. “You really think so?”
“Think so? I know so! Stevie! This is gonna be so good for you!” He drags Steve over to the couch so they can both sit. “I mean, think about it. And I don’t just mean the obvious high school shit. Even the little things. You’re good with people, dude. They just like you just ‘cause you’re you. And who knows more about you than anyone else?”
Steve frowns. “Robin?”
Eddie chuckles. “My mistake. General you, not specific. Your hairdresser! You tell them everything. And you live for that shit, Stevie, I see how your eyes light up when the kids share gossip.” He grabs Steve’s hands and smiles warmly at him. “I promise, everyone’s gonna be so happy for you.”
“Thanks, Eds,” Steve murmurs, cheeks still pink.
“And hey,” Eddie says, grinning again. “You’ve got at least one lifelong customer.” He points to himself, grinning when Steve laughs.
“Thanks,” he says, then takes a deep breath, suddenly serious again. Eddie schools his face accordingly. “Will you help me tell Robin?”
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Fic Taglist: @wonderland-girl143-blog
#stranger things#steve harrington#eddie munson#steddie#I’m terrible at titles someone help#essentially the plot is ‘Eddie is Steve’s hair dummy and they fall in love about it’#happy ending#maybe some slight angst bc Dustin doesn’t think before he speaks#and also possibly miscommunication between our boys#because always. it always happens#starambles
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