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sinstear · 18 days ago

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‎‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎ ‎SECRETS WILL KILL YOU, KEEP IT HUSH.

synopsis: what was once the best times of your lives, what happens when the one you loved more than live itself, your best friend; vanishes without a trace and it’s up to you and your friends to figure out what happened? can you save her in time? tags: major angst, talks of character death, reader being oblivious, cursing, nervous and depressed reader, talks of guns, an appearance from said gun near the end, sprinkles of fluff. happy ending, somewhat. there’s probably a bunch of other stuff i’m missing, but i need this out my face already. wc: 22k .... uhm, look away. an: i’m not sure how i feel about this, but i’ve been reading too many psychological books over this past month; send help asap, and had the idea to write a little something of my own, i say little like this isn’t sitting at a fat 20k+ words .. don’t judge me please or i’ll cry. i cried too much writing this because i hated it for so long LMAO. thank you @vifilms for proofreading and supporting this crazy idea, and helping me through it. i love you. anyway, enjoy <3

Thursday, 28th April 2015.

“you know you could just tell your date you came down with a cold, s’not like she would notice, girls too obsessed with herself notice anything,” Abby suggested, her round dark green glasses resting on the bridge of her nose.

“I can’t just lie,” You scoffed, looking up from your phone, and noticing Abby was clad in one of your sweaters, cross-legged and reading yet another recommended book. “Besides, you know me and dates never last, remember the last one? 20 minutes into getting to know her,”

“She accidentally mentioned her girlfriend, yes, I will never let you live it down.” Abby giggled from beside you and shrugged. “What’s the worst that could happen this time? She tells you about the 4 wives she has at home?”

“Funny,” You grumbled and slapped her shoulder playfully. Abby laughed and you felt your heart flutter. You liked it when she laughed, it felt refreshing and beautiful. “If that happens, I hope you’ll be there to rescue me when I call you stressed out.”

Holding her hand over her heart, the blonde nodded with a subtle smirk on her lips. “I solemnly swear I will always rescue you from your failed dates.”

“Hey, Honey.”

Jerry. Sweet and kind Jerry Anderson; He still looks young, even though the stubble on his face is more grey than before, the dark bags under his eyes darker, but you can tell the glint is slowly burning out in his eyes. He used to have a spark to him, but now it’s dim, almost vanishing right before you. “Hey, Mr Anderson.” You coughed on smoke and cleared your throat.

“C’mon kid, I’ve known you since you were in diapers, and throwing eggs at the neighbor’s house, you can call me Jerry.” He laughed, but the smile on his lips didn’t reach his eyes. Not like it used to be.

Stubbing out your cigarette on the sidewalk, you chuckled nervously and wiped your hands nervously on your jeans. “Yeah, no right, sorry, Jerry, habit, you know” you trailed off, looking at him silently, trying to work him out. “Any news?”

“No, don’t think there will be any for a while.”

Abby, your best friend, had made a joke once in her backyard that if you weren’t both in a serious relationship before you turned 18, you would both date, settle down, and get married. It was a promise you promised to keep, if anything, you would be right outside her door, asking her to be your girlfriend the second you turned 18.

Her 26th birthday is next week.

Abby disappeared just weeks before her 18th, she left your house happy and smiley, secretly hoping you would still be single in the next two weeks. She loved you. Jerry knew how much she adored and loved you. Hearing about the dates you would set yourself up on, broke her heart but you were her best friend, so she should be happy for you right? Never ruin a best friend’s dream and wish, she told herself each time she left you and went home to cry into her pillow while her dad, god bless his soul, sat on the end of her bed, comforted her, and stood by her.

“I miss her you know?” You finally mumbled out, looking away from him. “More than I did yesterday, and I’ll miss her more tomorrow than I did today.” The crack in your voice was evident, and it broke Jerry’s heart to see and hear you so distraught. His was hurting too, for so many reasons, but the main one was he didn’t know where his daughter was and it was slowly killing him.

“I know you do, kid,” His smile was faint, his hand trembling as he took a seat beside you on the sidewalk. “My girl loved you with all her heart,” His voice wavered and you couldn’t even smile at him, you couldn’t even promise him anything because how can you? “I know in my heart she’s still out there, somewhere, I’ve heard the talk, the gossip people are saying, saying that she’s dead, some days I believe it, some days I don’t, but I do know one thing, she’ll come back, to us, to you.”

“How do you know?”

“Because she’s an Anderson, we don’t give up,” Jerry laughed and for a second it felt like Abby was still with you, laughing and joking like nothing else in the world mattered. “And she’s your best friend, my girl wouldn’t leave you behind. She’ll come back, and that promise you made each other? When you were younger, stealing my beers and trying to smoke a joint?” He laughed again when your eyes widened and he patted your back lightly. “No judgment here, Abby is always safe with you, but you both made a promise, and she will always keep a promise.”

“I’ll find her, Jerry, I promise.”

“You’re slouching like a dog and m’pretty sure you’re drooling”

Peeling your eyes open slowly, you scowled at the sight of a smirking Ellie looking down at you amused. “Fuck off, what do you want?” You huffed, folding your arms over your chest and closing your eyes again.

“Saw Jerry,” Her voice was suddenly softer, and you could just picture the way she was playing with her fingers, not knowing what else to say. “He looked—”

“Worse for wear?”

“Something like that,” Ellie smiled and sat in the empty chair beside you. “I know this is a dumb question, but have you heard or seen anything?”

“You mean have I seen the girl I’m in love with walking around? The same girl who suddenly vanished into thin air?”

“Don’t be a dick, m’serious.”

“Then no, I haven’t seen Abby walking around. Do you think I would be sitting here, drinking a beer at 1pm if Abby was here?”

Ellie, even though she pisses you off and gets under your skin, was helpful with everything. She was always there if you needed someone to talk to, always about if you needed just a little help trying to figure out when and where Abby disappeared too. After the breakup with Dina, Ellie felt herself stuck in a hole, unable to feel that push to get out and get help. You were there for each other, even if Dina did give you a subtle glare or side eye when she saw you together. You and Ellie was a line neither of you would cross. That’s always been how it is.

“Hey guys!”

“Oh here we go,” Ellie shrank back in her chair and held back a groan. “Doesn’t this girl have other friends? I wouldn’t even say we are friends”

“Who is— Oh fuck sake.”

“How are we doing?!” Mandy, someone that Dina had brought into the friend group when Ellie and she were still together, skipped over and smiled at you both. “Ellie.”

“Anyway, as I was saying,” She completely blanked her, turned back to you, and smirked. “I think that we, me and you if you get my drift, should go and look for her.”

“Say fuckin’ what now?” You blinked.

“Find whom?”

“Abby, who else do you think?” Your friend snapped.

“Oh, the girl who wanted you to abandon our date that one time?”

You can see her lips moving, but you don’t know what she or even Ellie are saying; your eyes are locked in on the charm around her bracelet. It wasn’t there a few weeks ago, you’d know, she’s always happy and cheery, flinging her arms about like she’s just snorted the lemonade instead of drinking it. It looked oddly familiar, but at the same time, you couldn’t put your finger on it. “So what do you think?” Ellie’s voice pulled you from your thoughts, and she looked at you with that infuriating grin.

“About?”

“Finding Abby”

Ellie can’t tell if you want to throttle her or throw something at her with the way you’re staring at her. It used to freak her out when you would go silent and just stare like you suddenly forgot how to function, but lately, she’s gotten used to it, this is your way of processing something. “Ellie, you can’t be serious right? We don’t even know where she went before— before she just disappeared. How are we going to find her? With what money? Where do we even start? This isn’t some crime show we watch on the TV, Ellie, this is real, this is her life—”

Her hands came up, grabbed your shoulders, and squeezed tightly with a soft chuckle. “Breath, Nancy Drew, you’re going to give yourself a panic attack. We don’t have to suddenly rush off, and get ourselves into trouble, we just have to retrace steps. Abby’s steps.”

“It’s been years, El.”

“I know, but we’ll find her, okay? She wouldn’t just leave, and she wouldn’t leave you. We all know this, you know this.” Her smile reassured you somewhat, but you still had that nerve eating away at you. What if she really was gone?

The charm was still gnawing at you. Where could you have pictured it before? You weren’t 100% sure you were seeing things right, maybe it was one that you had thought you had seen before but it was your mind playing tricks on you. Maybe it was because you had a hole in your heart, and you were trying to put something there to ease it a little. To make it whole again.

So why couldn’t you let it go? Why did you have to keep pushing yourself into something that wasn’t there? Was it because you needed Abby, and you needed to find her? To restore your thoughts? Or was it because some part of you knew the outcome of what’s happened, and you were too afraid to say it out loud?

“Been a couple of years since you came in here,” Jerry’s voice rang out from behind you. He sounded tired. He probably hasn’t slept properly in years, just like you. So you knew how he was feeling. “You and Abby would try stealing the candy, but I always knew it was you two. Always sneaking around and causing trouble between yourselves.”

You looked at him over your shoulder, fingers grasping at the picture he hand hung up on the wall of Abby, tightly and smiled painfully. “Did Abby take anything? When you—”

“I would have told you, you know that.” Jerry cut you off, dropping the box in his hands onto the floor, and sighed softly. “I’ve been in her room hundreds of times since she, well, since she disappeared and I haven’t noticed anything different. I haven’t even changed the wallpaper, s’too hard to handle.”

“She wouldn’t have left without a reason, Jerry. Abby doesn’t just go missing. If she was in trouble, she would have come to me, if anything was wrong, she would have called me, she would have asked for my help.”

“This is hard for me to talk about.”

“And you think It’s not hard for me?” You scoffed, gripping the picture tighter. “My best friend goes missing and there’s not a goddamn thing I can do. There’s nothing I can do. It fucking kills me to know that she’s probably out there, scared and alone, and I’m here feeling sorry for myself? You know how fucking shitty that makes me feel that I couldn’t keep her safe? She’s not fucking here and It’s my fault because I didn’t protect her hard enough. I should have walked her home that night, I should have done more.”

For the first time in years, Jerry can see how terrified you are. For a while, you’ve been able to keep your emotions and feelings at bay, keep them under control, but as you stand there, looking at him, he can see a younger you. A scared little you. You look small, broken, and terrified as you stand before him. “This isn’t your fault,” He shakes his head and clenches his fist. “This has never been your fault.”

“When I look at you, I wait for you to shout and yell at me. Blame me for her going missing, I wait every single time, and it never comes. That’s pathetic, right? That I wait for you to blame me for the reason your daughter is missing.”

His sudden sob catches your attention, and you feel like shit. You’ve never meant to make him upset, you’ve always been the one to make people laugh, to make their stomachs hurt over a silly joke you made, but always has everyone laughing and smiling. But you’ve made him cry, and you suddenly feel lost again. “M’sorry—”

“I’ve never blamed you for this, and I won’t start today”

You find Ellie on her porch step that same afternoon after your conversation with Jerry, nursing a glass of water in her hand and her eyebrow raises just slightly when you storm over and stand right in front of her with your arms folded over your chest. “Alright? You look like you’re on the verge of a mental breakdown or murder.” She joked, and your lips quirked up just slightly. “What’s up?”

“I want to find Abby.”

Just like that, Ellie placed her glass beside her, almost knocking it over when she leaned back and grinned at you. “Nancy Drew, this is going to be something,” She lazily smiled and stood up quickly. “Just don’t go telling Joel, he worries enough about me and whatnot,”

“Tell him that we’re just going camping, just until we get somewhere with whatever steps we have to retrace around here.”

“Camping?” She scoffed and glared at you.

“Ellie, you dress like you live in the fuckin’ woods, he’ll believe you.” You rolled your eyes, brushed past her, up the stairs, and into her house. “C’mon idiot!”

“God, yes Mother!”

When you were younger, you and Abby spent a lot of time at Ellie’s house. Joel always had to refill glasses with lemonade to put more sandwiches on empty plates, and you were always thankful for him, Ellie, and Abby. Always for Abby. The memories of your childhood, your growing up, lingered in certain parts of the house. For a split second, you felt like you were back there as you walked into the living room; you remember how Abby almost cried when she lost a game of Uno, and Ellie teased her nonstop for it. You remember how the blonde would cuddle into your side during random movie nights, especially the horror movies Dina decided to watch, even though she would turn them off most of the time because it got too scary.

The picture of the 4 of you still sits on the fireplace and a smile curves on your lips. You still remember the day it was taken, and how cold it was to take such a picture in the snow. If you squint hard enough, you can see the redness forming on Abby’s nose, and if pictures had audio then you would be able to faintly hear the chattering sound of Ellie’s teeth at how cold it was that night. You weren’t sure if Ellie would have gotten rid of all the memories, but you were thankful she didn’t. You lost Abby, Jerry lost Abby, but in the end, you all lost her. You all lost a part of yourselves that morning he couldn’t find her. A little bit of each of you died when the posters were put up all around Jackson not even a week later. The missing poster still haunts you. No matter what.

“Even in pictures, Abby always wanted to be close to you.”

Joel. Placing the picture back down, you turn around and find him holding logs of wood. His hair was slightly shorter; Ellie probably had enough and took the scissors to it. His eyes still had a small glimmer of hope, but he still looked exhausted. “Yeah,” You nodded and fumbled with your hoodie sleeve. “Haven’t taken a photo since, feels too weird without her in them. It would also feel like cheating, can’t take a picture that she’s not in, you know?” A faint smile tugged at your lips.

“You’ll all take one together when she’s back, no doubt about it. Hell, Ellie will probably fill her wall with new pictures of you guys,” Like Jerry, Joel’s smile doesn’t reach his eyes and you hold back either a sigh or a cry. “El misses her too, you know?” He added quietly, like he was scared she would hear you both. “She might not talk about it, like you, but I’ve heard her crying at night, sometimes it takes me hours to get her to calm down. Poor girl almost sent herself into a panic attack last night because she was crying so much. I wish I knew how to help her, all I ever want is to help her and keep her safe and I don’t know how. I feel lost because I can’t help her when she needs it.”

“You’re doing the best you can, Joel.” You wanted to help her too, you wanted to ease and help everyone but even you were lost and confused. “She knows you’re here, and she’ll come to you when she’s ready to talk about it. I promise.”

“Yeah I know—”

“Joel? I thought you were out with Tommy?” Ellie appeared finally and looked between you both. “You guys alright?” She laughed nervously and dropped her jacket on the back of the chair with a shiver. It was slowly getting colder, so more blankets and fires were needed.

“Yeah, yeah, was just catching up and stuff, haven’t seen Joel or Tommy for a while.”

“If you didn’t cancel on the dinner last week, you would have seen them,” She teased, kissing Joel’s cheek and taking the wood from his hands before walking over to the almost gone-out fire. “Old man misses you, he misses all of you.”

Even Abby, she thinks.

“Right, you guys staying for dinner or?” Joel laughed.

“Yes, we’re staying,” Ellie looked at you, folding her arms over her chest. “Aren’t we?”

“Yeah, missed your cooking.” You grinned playfully at him.

“We’ll be in my room!”

“I know El, It’s the only place you socialize.”

Pushing open her door, Ellie slumps herself in her desk chair, sighs, and then looks over at you as you slump face-first onto her bed. “Right, operation find Abby, what’s first?”

“Well, we all saw her that night, surely someone knows something that we don’t,” you mumbled before lifting your head slowly with a grumble. “Abby doesn’t just go missing within 24 hours, El. Not without someone seeing something. Have you seen how many people lurk outside the bar? Lurk around the shops? Someone has to have seen her, or something.”

“So, we start there. We ask everyone.”

“C’mon dude, surely you remember seeing her at least once that night?!” Ellie scowled, holding up a photograph of Abby in his face, almost shoving it under his nose with how angry she was getting. Sighing under your breath, you reached your hand up and pulled her arm away.

“El, he doesn't remember, let’s ask someone else. Preferably someone who isn’t drunk right now.”

“We’ve been asking people for hours—”

“It’s not going to happen overnight El, and as much as I want it to, It’s impossible.” You rubbed at your face and sighed loud enough for her scowl to drop and a frown to appear. “I just want her to be okay, and I know that she’s scared somewhere, whenever she is, but I need to find her.”

“We’ll find her, we’ll look around all day and night if we have to.”

The metal door clangs loudly against the brick wall, sending a slight vibration through the floor, and the feeling of terror sinks in all over again. The room is dark, and cold, not even a blanket could keep you warm if you tried hard enough. The days have been lost, not even sure what year it is anymore, and not even having enough energy to count specks of dirt on the walls have been long forgotten. The energy to keep going was slowly getting lower and lower.

The painful squeak of the door opening would cause anyone to lose sleep. “Eat your food, don’t make me waste more money on this shit if you don’t want to eat it. Stop being ungrateful and do what I tell you.” The small plate of food hits the floor, almost going everywhere, and just like that the door slams shut again without another word.

How much longer?

“Yeah, I saw her.”

Both yours and Ellie’s eyebrows shoot up at his words, and you look at her with a glimmer of hope. “You did? You saw her?” You asked.

“Course I did,” He nodded, taking a hit from his cigarette and coughing abruptly. “Was getting something from the bakery store, bread or something? She wasn’t there for long, but I saw her.”

“Was she with anyone?”

“Nah, was by herself, she didn’t seem to be in a rush or anything. I was cleaning up the tables outside, and that’s when I saw her. Then when it came about that she had gone missing the next week, I didn’t know what to think. I don’t think she went missing, but I suppose I should let the professionals deal with it.”

“Professionals,” Ellie clicked her tongue on the side of her mouth and laughed. “Yeah because they’re much help.”

“Thank you,” You smiled apologetically. “Let us know if you can remember anything else.”

“Will do. Hope you find her.”

Just as you and Ellie turned around to leave, to ask someone else, that high-pitched voice rang out again. Stopping you both in your tracks. “Hi!” Mandy smiled sweetly, looking between you both as she got closer.

“Gonna take this pencil and shove it right in my fuckin’ eye,” Ellie grumbled under her breath.

“Hi, Mandy.” You murmured.

“Whatcha doing?”

“Looking for Abby, didn’t we mention this to you yesterday?”

Jabbing Ellie in the rib, you shook your head when she glared at you and slapped on a fake smile. “Did you see Abby at all?” You asked, looking at her closely.

Mandy looked between you both again, eyes just widening slightly before she laughed and shrugged. “No? We weren’t close.”

“Don’t have to be close to someone to know if you saw them or not.” Ellie pointed out.

“I was with my parents, and even if I did see her, I was drinking too much that night to know,” She shrugged again, looking at you with a happy smile. One that for some reason, made you uncomfortable. “Speaking of which, I have some books I have to give back to my parents.”

“You remember being drunk that many years ago?”

There it was again, the wave of her hand brushing her hair away from her face when you noticed that same bracelet charm. It was making you irritated because you still can’t picture where it’s from, or who made it. But you know that you’ve seen it before, that you do know and are aware of. “—If there’s anything I can do to help, let me know, okay?” Mandy offered, giving you one final smile before she walked away.

“She pisses me off more and more every day I swear. Remind me why you went on a date with her?” Ellie slipped the pen into her pocket and rubbed her nose harshly. Was she coming down with yet another cold? You thought to yourself.

“M’not sure, she always cornered me when I was alone and kept asking until I said yes, that’s it.” You shrugged as you both walked. “She always shows up when we’re talking about Abby, no?”

“I don’t think she’s the kidnapping or killing type, to be honest. Too bubbly and cheerful.”

“She’s not dead, Ellie.”

Halting in her steps, Ellie turns around and acknowledges her words quickly. “Shit, no I know, I didn’t mean it like that. This is just stressing me out, we’re still getting nowhere.”

You both take a seat on the chairs outside the bakery, tired and feeling sorry for yourself as you both silently look through the list of names of people you still need to talk to. Wanted to know if anyone had seen her, just something. “There’s still the lady who owns the wine shop, that creepy guy who owns the other bar,” Ellie mumbled.

Brushing your fingers over the paper, you shrink back in the chair with a sigh, one that already explains how tired you are, and close your eyes.

Saturday, 1st May 2015.

“Yeah, m’here,” you mumbled, holding your phone to your ear, feet kicking at the rocks. “Make sure you rescue me.”

“I have a good feeling about this date,” Abby admitted softly, unbeknownst to you, holding back her sobs, and smiled even though you couldn’t see her. “I think It’s going to be amazing.”

“Yeah? How do you know?”

“Because I know you, and you deserve this.”

Her words buried deep in your chest, and you felt your eyes slowly well up with tears, but you couldn’t cry, not today, not when you were about to have a fucking date. “Abby?”

You weren’t sure if you heard the hitch in her breath, and if you did, you ignored it. “Yeah?” She asked, fumbling with the sleeve of the hoodie she stole from you.

“Thank you.”

Blinking away the tears in her eyes, Abby smiles sadly to herself. “Of course. I love you.”

“I love you—”

“Y/N? Hi!”

“Abby I gotta go, I’ll come over after, yeah?”

“Good luck.”

Slipping your phone into your back pocket once you hung up, you smiled tightly. “Mandy, right?”

“The one and only! Seems unsettling it took you until the first date to know my name, but whatever, we’re here now.” She didn’t seem to notice your tight-lipped smile and urge to roll your eyes. “Shall we?”

“Lead the way.”

The small restaurant was slightly dimmed, smelling of cigarettes and strong beer. Mandy didn’t seem to mind, in fact, she was happily walking around; looking for a table to sit at and a small shriek of happiness flooded from her once she found a table that fitted her. “Let’s sit, come come.” The redhead hurried, throwing her bag and jacket onto the table beside her.

“Oh, uh, sure,” You took her things, smiling apologetically at the old couple who looked at her shocked, and seated yourself in the chair opposite her. “M’not sure what to eat here, never been before.” You admitted sheepishly.

Mandy, who had yet to even speak, looked at you with a smile. “Everything here is good except for the lemon tart and the white wine.”

“What’s wrong with the wine?”

“Tastes like shit, typical for them, and whatnot.” She shrugged again, and It caught you off guard with how fast she covered up her distaste for things with a wide smile. One that’s almost sinister-looking. She was a good person though, Dina mentioned she was. You couldn’t judge her based on a smile. “Now, how did you meet Dina and Ellie?”

“I met Abby first, actually—”

“Abby? Why doesn’t that name ring a bell?”

“Oh, uh, Jerry Anderson’s daughter? They own the candy store?”

“Ah,” Mandy flashed yet another smile, sitting back in her chair and nodding along. “Don’t know them personally, I wouldn’t have a reason to.”

“Right,” Clearing your throat, you hummed and gave her your best grin. Did you look stupid? Maybe, but did she care? Apparently not. “How did you meet Dina?”

The sharp pinch on your skin had your eyes snapping open, your body almost falling out of the chair when you spotted Ellie looking at you, grinning from ear to ear. “Dude, fuck you.”

“You’re wasting time, If m’not allowed to nap, then you aren’t allowed either.” She scoffed, slipped the sheet of paper into her pocket, and stood up. “We aren’t getting anywhere, let’s go back to mine and we can go from there.”

“What if there’s nothing?”

“There’s always something.”

You started to lose count of the days. First they started as days, and then they suddenly started blending into weeks. You and Ellie were still none the wiser. Still lost on every account of what happened when Abby had left your house the night she vanished. You had barely left your bed; only to shower, brush your teeth and eat, but besides that, it felt like you were falling into another deep hole you weren’t sure you could dig yourself out of.

Today was the first day you gathered enough energy to pull yourself out of the hole that was your unmade bed, and clothe yourself in something that had way too many holes, and probably is over 5 years old, but it was a start. “Most books that come back are usually missing a couple of pages, s’not unusual,” Brenda, the owner, explained with a tired smile. “Doesn’t make it less annoying though.”

“Yeah, can’t read a book with a fuckin’ page missin,” You grumbled, feeling the same emotions as her. You could get lost in your books, and to know the one you wanted to read was missing about 5 pages pissed you off. “S’fine, I’ll just take the other books.”

“Are you sure, Honey?”

“Yeah, m’sure—”

From the corner of your eye, there was a sudden flash, a sliver of blonde hair caught your attention and your body did a full 180, dropping the books on the floor, causing Brenda to let out a scowl and drop to her knees quickly just to pick them up. They were collector books, how dare you just drop them?” Shit, fuck, sorry, Brenda, I have to go—”

You were already running away before you finished your sentence. Pushing people out of your way, tugging them and almost pushing them over as you scrambled to get past the large crowds. “Abby!?” You shouted, sadly tripping someone over in the process, but a part of you didn’t care. “Move out the fuckin’ way,” Your hands pressed onto a back, shoving them a little too hard for anyone’s liking, sending them tumbling over one of the stools. “Abby!”

Before you could comprehend anything else, let alone think about the blonde hair, your body barreled into another harshly, sending you both to the floor, your back hits the dirty floor with a loud thud and winds you in the process. “Fuck!” You hissed, coughing painfully.

“Jesus Christ, Y/N.”

Jesse. Turning on your side, your eyes flutter open, the pain in your back trailing all over your body as you find him already pushing himself off the floor, crouching beside you, and holding a hand out for you. “Sorry, I just thought I saw someone.” You explained, taking his hand and letting him pull you up.

“Abby?”

“What?”

“You were shouting her name,” He laughed, shrugging his shoulders and dusting off yours. “Dina told me you and Ellie were looking for her, or something like that,” Jesse murmured, holding his hand up to block the sun from his eyes. “Had any luck?”

“I wouldn’t be shouting her name like a fuckin’ maniac and pushing people over if I had luck finding her,” You scoffed and rolled your eyes. His smile fell at your aggression, but quickly recovered and patted your shoulder with another smile. “Sorry, I’ve just— I don’t know what to do, It feels like she’s still here, somewhere, and I just want her to come back.”

“I know, and she will. You’re both like, stuck to each other, If anyone can find her, It’s you,”

“Y/N! Y/N!”

Turning your head, you find Ellie frantically running towards you and Jesse. She barely acknowledges him though and instead, shoves a piece of paper into your hands before hunching over, resting her hands on her thighs and panting heavily. “What’s this?” You question with a raised eyebrow.

“Abby was arguing with someone,” She spoke between pants and cleared her throat. “That creepy old man we saw last week? Freaked me the fuck out, to be honest, but when I saw him again this morning, he kind of cornered me and started telling me that she was arguing with someone near the barn, it got heated, but that’s all he remembers.” Ellie finally got out.

“Arguing? With who?”

“Fuck if I know, but he said it sounded bad. So whoever she was arguing with, knows where she went, or was the one to see her last, right?” She blinked, copying Jesse and blocking the sun from her face with her hand.

“I thought I saw her,”

“Saw who? Abby? When?”

“Was talking to Brenda about books, and then It just felt like I saw her—”

“Almost took me out in the process.” Jesse chimed in.

Rolling your eyes, you looked down at the sheet of paper; the same sheet that listed the names of everyone who lived here. “So she was arguing with someone? That could have been anyone.”

“Half of them are old, one argument would send them into their coffin—”

“Ellie!”

“What?! M’just saying! It’s true.”

“Jesse, do you remember Abby wearing jewelry?” You asked after a few seconds of silence.

His eyebrow rose this time, only to furrow. “Uh, maybe, I’m not sure, why?”

“Abby never wore jewelry unless it was from you or Jerry.” Ellie gave you the same confused look. “Why? What is that big head of yours thinking?”

“Nah, s’nothing, was just wondering,” You shook them off and scrambled the paper between your hands. “Something just feels off and I can’t explain it no matter how much I think.”

“Jerry still has all those pictures we took, maybe we can start there this time, see if anything jumps out at you?” Jesse suggested this time.

“Wha— You?” Ellie scoffed.

“Abby is my friend too, Ellie.”

“And yet you’ve never taken the time to visit us or Jerry since she went missing, shocker, Jesse.”

“Guys, enough,” You pinched the bridge of your nose harshly and sighed deeply. “Let’s just go see Jerry for the pictures.”

Jerry wasn’t lying when he said he hadn’t changed anything in Abby’s bedroom. The wallpaper was still the yellow and sunflower she picked when she turned 16. The bed sheets were the same light blue with clouds that scattered around the fabric. Her mirror still had every Polaroid hung up from the multiple drunk nights you all had. “There’s still another box in the attic, I’ll get it for you.” Her Dad appeared in the doorway, looking at you all with a gentle smile. “Weird seeing all of you in her room after so long,” He chuckled and placed the box on her bed. “Can I get any of you something to eat or drink?”

“No, thank you.”

“M’alright, but thank you, Jerry.”

“Can I have a glass of water?”

“Really, Jesse?” Ellie glared.

“What?! I’m thirsty.” Jesse glared back.

“I’ll get your drink and then grab the last box.” Jerry laughed at their bickering and left the room.

“Right,” Ellie clasped her hands together and took refuge at Abby’s untouched desk. You could tell Jerry hadn’t touched anything there because the old music festival poster was still lying there on the oak. “Something that could help us.” She muttered to herself while you and Jesse were already opening the box.

“I didn’t realize how many pictures we took when we were all together,” Jesse smiled fondly at the thought of seeing so many old memories between you all and instantly shoved his hand into the filled box and grabbed a handful of pictures.

“How many are there?” Ellie laughed from the other side of the room.

“More than Joel has of those vinyls, that’s for sure.” You chuckled.

“Old man is gonna be so jealous we have more pictures together than he has of his beloved music.”

“Or you could find another that he doesn’t have yet, you know, being a good daughter to the old man seeing as he feeds you 4 times a day and takes care of you,” You suggested with a subtle smirk. “Just a little idea of what to get him for his birthday.”

“Oh yeah? What are you gonna get him then?”

“Another jumper, what else?”

“You’ve given him over 10 since you met him!”

“Didn’t you steal 3 of my jumpers?” You quipped back, eyebrow rose and lips quirked up.

“You just— Your jumpers are comfy, okay!?”

“Oh I was just asking, you’re the one getting all defensive,” You teased before taking your handful of pictures. You don’t remember each time you took them, there were so many that it could go back years before you were even friends with Ellie or Jesse. There were more than enough to write an entire book; it seemed as you scanned over a couple.

As you went to grab another set, seeing as the ones you picked didn’t really give you much, you had knocked over the pile that Jesse had already looked through, and sent them tumbling to the floor. Cursing under your breath, you rolled your eyes at yourself and sighed. “Shit,” You grumbled, placing the pile of photos on the bed before kneeling on the floor to grab the few that you knocked over. “Ellie, did you find anything?”

“Nah, still nothing.” The Brunette sighed from the desk.

Picking up the abandoned photos, you quickly catch onto a slight glint and sparkle from the corner of your eye; furrowing your eyebrows, you push the pictures onto the bed with the others, and lean your head down more, looking under her bed. “What the—” Reaching towards whatever it was you thought you saw, you grabbed it, and your lips parted with a soft exhale.

A bracelet.

Holding it up, you inspected it closely. “What’s that?” Jesse spoke up as you noticed there were quite a few charms already missing. Did Abby hide them? Why was there only a few left, and the others were gone? “Is that Abby’s?”

Ellie had quickly snatched it from your hands, which caused you to almost stumble onto the floor at her abrupt movement, held the bracelet up and looked at it. “I’ve only seen this once,”

“So It’s hers?”

“I assume so, I saw her with it on her 16th birthday,” Ellie nodded and took a seat in the middle of Abby’s bed with her legs crossed. “I’ve only seen her with it on once, and I mean, you guys should know that too seeing as you got her the fuckin’ thing, Y/N”

Did you? Then why couldn’t you remember?

“How don’t you remember?” Jesse laughed and slapped the back of your head gently. “Can we just talk about the fact she wore all of your clothes? She wouldn’t go out unless you were going, nor would she go to any of the parties here unless you were with her? You were both obsessed with each other. You bought it for her, or made it for her, should I say.”

“Made it?” You choked out, looking over at the bracelet that was still in Ellie’s hands. “I don’t—”

“It’s been hard for all of us, but more so for you,” Ellie admitted quietly and smiled sadly. “Abs was closer to you than the rest of us. We can all understand that this is something you don’t remember because you’re too busy blaming yourself.”

“That’s not—”

“Y/N, you’ve been blaming yourself the second the missing posters went up,” Jesse spoke, sitting beside Ellie on the bed. “Every day since then you’ve blamed yourself,and you’re still blaming yourself, right now, I just know your head is going through the cycle It’s been going through for the past god knows how many years.”

“But why don’t I remember making her that? Why?”

“Because you’re blocking it out,” Jerry spoke up. “You’re blocking out all the memories because you’re scared.”

“M’not scared—”

Planting the final box on the floor, Jerry crouches beside you and places his hand comfortingly on your shoulder. “You’re blocking them out because you’re scared. You’ve been blocking them out because you’re blaming yourself, and maybe if you block them out, it won’t hurt you as much—”

“Hurt me,” You scoffed and shrugged his hand off your shoulder as you stumbled to your feet. “Won’t hurt me as much. M’not ready to let her go, is that better for you? Maybe if I keep my memories locked away, I’ll have more time to make new ones when she comes home. I know this is fucking hard for all of us, for you, but it is killing me—” You paused to take a deep breath, ignoring the worried looks on all of them. “It’s fucking killing me going through fucking photos, asking people around the fucking village, trying to figure out what happened when she’s fucking alone, all alone and I don’t know where she is. This is pointless, all of this is pointless because Abby means more to me than some pictures! I’m here looking at fucking pictures while the girl I love is somewhere out there, fucking scared and there’s nothing I can do. I can’t promise you anything, I can’t promise no one anything”

“Y/N—” Jerry frowned as he rose to his feet and cupped your face gently between his hands. “You’re looking for her,” He murmured with a soft smile. “You’re doing something, and you’re doing a better job than the so-called professionals.”

“I can’t even figure out who she argued with, I haven’t done anything.” You choked out, body falling into his as he wrapped his arm around you and cupped the back of your head. “I need her back, I just want her back.”

“I have faith. With you both, I always have.” Jerry smiled.

You weren’t sure what happened after your small breakdown, all you know is that you’re still sitting in Abby’s bedroom 5 hours later. Still sifting through endless pictures, notes, journals, anything to give you a hint of something. Was Abby afraid of someone? Why was she arguing? Who was she arguing with? You had so many questions and yet you felt like you had so little time to get everything. “This is the second time she’s yelled at me, what did I do wrong?” Ellie, who was hunched over the desk, mumbled as your eyes locked onto her back.

“Ellie? Who yelled at you?” You asked, sitting up slowly.

“What? No, It’s a diary entry in Abby’s journal,” She turned around, made her way over to you, climbed onto the bed, and slumped beside you. “Look,” Ellie passed you the book, onto the page she was reading and you furrowed your eyebrows when you saw it.

“Who yelled at her?” You took the journal from her hand and skimmed through more of the pages, ones you assume Ellie has yet to read through. Jesse left not that long ago, muttering apologies but his parents wanted him to help with dinner.

The more you flipped through, the more you noticed.

Sunday, 2nd May 2015.

I think she hates me. I’m not sure what I did for her to hate me, but apparently I must have done something.

Sunday, 2nd May 2015.

She threatened me today. I haven’t stopped crying. I don’t know why she hates me.

Monday, 3rd May 2015.

It’s getting harder and harder to look at her and tell her I’m fine. It’s breaking my heart and I can’t even talk to her about it.

“Obviously the last one has to be about you. So something happened and she couldn’t even talk to you about it, I assume?” Ellie slumped her head on your shoulder and grumbled. “Is there anything else? To just give us a timeline for however long this went on for?”

“That was the last one,” You closed the book and placed it on your lap with another long sigh. “Abby never told Jerry anything, so I doubt talking to him about this is going to do much.”

“So, over the past god knows how many weeks we’ve been doing this, we’ve found out that someone was on Abby’s case, who, that’s still another thing we need to figure out,” Ellie explained, nervously fumbling with the ring on her finger.

“I wish she would have spoken to me, I could have done something, kept her even safer,” You felt worse now than you did earlier, reading those journal entries made your heart sink. Your best friend, the girl you were in love with, was going through something she felt like she couldn’t even talk to you about.

“Abby would hate that you’re blaming yourself,” Ellie frowned, curling into your side and rubbing her nose. “You know that she would never let you think that about yourself, it will kill her to know you’re blaming everything on yourself, still.”

“I always promised I would keep her safe, and I couldn’t even do that. If I did, she would still be here, she wouldn’t be missing, El.”

“When we find her, m’going to ask her for permission to punch you—”

“Why?!” You cut her off, outraged and shocked at her words.

“Because then maybe you’ll stop blaming yourself for this, for everything that’s happened.”

You’re sitting at the bar the next evening when it happens, minding your own business as you wait for Jesse and Ellie, when a guy, a gruff guy walks up to you; slightly drunk and smoking a cigarette, when he bumps into your shoulder and scowls. “Heard you and your little friends are looking for that girl,” He hiccups, the stench of his beer breath has your stomach churning and nose scrunching up at the smell.

“Fucks it to you?”

“She’s been gone for years, no chance she’s gonna turn up now, no?” His laugh made your skin crawl and you didn’t know if you wanted to smash his beer bottle over his head or break his jaw. Maybe both, it would be easier for him to stop talking to you. “I don’t know why you try, she was a lost cause years before she disappeared.”

“You don’t even know her, shut your fuckin’ mouth.” You warned, standing up slowly. You towered over him by a few more inches, and half expected him to cower away, most people did, but he didn’t, he just laughed harder, taking constant drags of his cigarette and looked you up and down. “M’not afraid to shove that bottle down your throat, now fuck off.” Your face was now in his, and the smell of beer smelt worse if that was even possible.

“Oh yeah? The fuck you gonna do? Shove this bottle down my throat? Your threats are empty and pointless, like your search for your little fuckin’ girlfriend—”

“Say one more thing about her, I dare you.”

Before you can go through with your promise, a hand grabs your arm and pulls you away. “He’s not worth it, just let it go.” Ellie, who you hadn’t even noticed arrived, murmured into your ear and dragged you away from the smiling man. “Fighting someone isn’t worth it when we have someone more important to find, okay?”

“Stupid cunt.” You growled at him, letting Ellie drag you out of the bar and into the open air. “Could have just let me throttle the bastard or something.”

“And risk you getting into trouble when Abby is waiting for you?” Jesse spoke up and pushed himself off the wall.

Just her name has you relaxing in your spot and nodding to yourself slowly. Abby was waiting for you, wherever that might be, she was. No matter how long it takes, you’re going to be the one to save the woman you love. All you have is hope. Pulling out your small box of cigarettes along with your lighter, you shove one between your lips, lighting it up and taking a long drag. “So, the notes, the bracelet, what’s next?” You mumbled between puffs.

“Are you chain smoking?” Ellie laughed with a subtle scoff.

“Give me a break, I haven’t slept properly in years,” You rolled your eyes and slumped your head on Jesse’s shoulder. “What’s next?” You asked again.

As Ellie went to open her mouth, Mandy appeared outside the small shop beside the bar, looking over at you and waving quickly. “Y/N!” And before you knew it, she was already standing in front of you before you had the time to register what was going on. “Are you free tonight?”

Coughing on your cigarette, Jesse slapped your back and laughed softly while you cleared your throat and smiled painfully at her. “Tonight? Uhm m’not sure, why?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to come over and have dinner with me?”

“Tonight?”

“Yes, silly, I said tonight didn’t I?”

You could see Ellie rolling her eyes beside you from the corner of your eyes, and as much as you wanted to say no, maybe saying yes might help your case. You could try and find something else about Abby, maybe Mandy might have seen someone being rude or mean to Abby when you weren’t around. “Yeah, sure!” You agreed, a little too enthusiastically for your liking.

“What?!” Ellie shouted.

“Oh really? That would be wonderful, how’s 7?”

“7 is great, Mandy”

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” Ellie whisper-yelled once Mandy walked away and was so far away that she couldn’t hear you guys. “Are you fucked in the head or something?”

“Relax, If It’s just me with her, she might know something and tell me.”

Eyeing you up closely, she simply sighs and slaps your back gently. “Make sure you text or call if she starts to freak you out too much.”

“Or if she tries to kiss you again,” Jesse added with a snicker.

“You guys are so funny, seriously, should become comedians or something.” You took another drag of your cigarette and glared at them both.

“And never be able to see your angelic face again? How would I survive?” Ellie gasped dramatically and grinned. “No but seriously, don’t give into her weirdness. Remember, only anything to do with Abby, got it?”

“Yes mom,” You huffed while Ellie simply pinched your arm and laughed at your scowl. “We have time to kill until then though. Any idea on who threatened her? I keep thinking but no one comes to mind.”

“No fuckin’ idea, Abby had her secrets, ones she didn’t tell us about, but if it risked her like, m’sure she would have told one of us right? She wouldn’t just hide it until something like this happened?”

“None of us knew this was going to happen, let alone Abby knowing,” You murmured, using your shoe to put out the cigarette you dropped on the floor once you were done with it. “Abby used to have multiple journals, were the others not in there?”

“Not that I saw, she probably kept there somewhere else. Journals aren’t supposed to be snooped in, hiding it is what I would have done if I had one.”

“So you’re saying we look in her room again?”

“Worth a try, might find something else.”

Abby’s Dad didn’t mind that you were once again sitting in her bedroom, it was something you all did when you were younger; Abby’s house being the one that everyone hung out in the most, so changing that routine now would be pointless.

Looking through the endless supply of books in her bookshelf, you bite back another sigh when you placed yet another back, still not finding anything that could be of use or even a fuckin’ clue, and turning around. Ellie was sitting cross-legged on the floor at the end of the bed, going through the journals you both looked through last night, and with the sigh she lets out when she throws her head back, you know it’s another deadend.

“Nothing, again.”

Sitting down beside her, you take the journal from her hands, your fingers brush against the words, even her words were somewhat comforting to you. As you fumbled with the pages, you were suddenly intrigued with what Ellie was doing; Reading notes you all used to write for each other if one of you had gotten into trouble with your parents, and weren’t allowed to leave the house. “Abby never got in trouble, like ever,” She laughed.

“Because we never told Jerry about the other shit,” You snickered, the memory of Abby trying weed for the first time, and her Dad freaking out when you both arrived home, slightly buzzed out your minds, trying to act normal. “He knows about most of the weed stories, but not the insane shit we used to get up to as kids.”

“We were fuckin’ crazy, weren’t we?”

“Oh, we should have been shipped off to the ward for the shit we did.”

“Remember Brenda thinking she had rats in the shop? But it was just us making it seem like she was going crazy?”

“I still regret that, I wouldn’t have done it if you didn’t give me 4 joints before,” You threw your head back and laughed. Your laughter died down quite quickly when you brushed your thumb against the edge of the page, a sharp pain shooting through your hand. “Shit! Ow.”

“Fuck you do?”

“Paper cut,” You grumbled and looked down at your small wound.

Only for your eyes to widen at the slight kink in the paper.

“Ellie”

“Did you know that Abby used to call you butterfly?” Ellie, oblivious to your stare, laughed.

“Ellie” You repeated, louder this time.

“What?”

Turning to face you, her eyes land on the paper instead of your face, and the letters fall from between her fingers once you’re peeling apart two pieces that had somewhat been glued together.

“Typical Abby, fair play,” Ellie murmured once you pushed the two pieces apart.

A whole new entry.

Tuesday, 4th May 2015

I can feel her. She’s everywhere. She’s told me to back off, but what do I say when she notices I’m pulling away? I can’t even smile at her without it being a problem. What if she kills me? She’s crazy, I don’t think anyone understands. I tried to keep her away, but she’s clawing her way into everything and tearing things apart. At night, I can see her outside the window, looking at me, smiling at me, looking at me like she wants to kill me. Who do I tell? Who can I go to without making it a big issue? Is she really capable of killing me? Making me disappear?

What if she kills me?

What if she does?

What if this is the last time I’ll see my friends, my dad, my journals?

What……………….

Closing the book quickly, Ellie flinches beside you at the force, and you pinch the bridge of your nose. “This is getting fuckin’ weird.” You admitted. “I’m going to kill whoever it is.”

“Let’s not jump to those conclusions just yet, is there anything else?”

“No, it’s the only page we haven’t seen. So it’s a woman, a woman was the last person to see her, right? That’s gotta be the only reason right now. We have nothing else and if there is other stuff, we’re fuckin’ missing it.”

“I can look through everything again when you’re with that crazy one, see if we missed anything. I don’t mind drinking another black coffee, some energy drinks and staying awake all night.” Ellie joked.

“I don’t mind going through it all again with you when I get back. We’re still meeting up later, yeah?”

“If she doesn’t somehow kidnap you and trick you into dating you, yeah.”

6:45pm rolled around quickly and you found yourself standing outside of Mandy’s house, one hand shoved in your jacket pocket while the other was at your side, and patiently waiting. Just as you were about to knock a second time, the door swung open to reveal a very happy Mandy, smile so wide you could see her teeth. “You made it!”

“Course,” You laughed, digging your hand deeper into your pocket. “Sorry m’early,”

“Don’t worry, earlier the better! Come in, it’s cold out here tonight,”

Stepping aside to let you in, Mandy’s hand brushes against yours as you walk past her and into her warmer house, oblivious to the way her eyes raked over you, almost a little too desperately. “The food is in the oven, should be ready soon, can I take your jacket?”

“Nah, you’re alright, It’s freezing out there, gotta warm myself up a little.” You smiled, eyes instantly noticing just how neatly the table was set. The candles flickered almost angrily, the cutlery placed perfectly, and the tablecloth somehow matched everything. “This is nice,”

“Yes, isn’t it? I wanted it to be perfect for you.” Mandy commented softly. “I’m just going to check on the food, feel free to take a seat, get yourself comfortable and stuff, I won’t be long.”

“Take your time.”

Just as you sat down at her table, a sudden loud banging had you flinching in your seat. You looked over at Mandy who halted in her steps not even 5 minutes later when she reappeared from the kitchen and from where you were sitting you could see and hear her grinding her teeth together. “What was that?”

“The neighbors are probably decorating again, It’s starting to get on my nerves If I’m being honest.”

“At 7:30?” You laughed nervously.

“They have no consideration for those who live beside them. I’ll start giving them a piece of my mind If they keep it up,” She explained, placing the hot pot in the middle of the table with a bright and wide smile. “There! Can I get you anything to drink? Water? Juice? Wine?”

“Smells amazing,” You smiled and got a little more comfortable in your seat before looking at her again. “Water’s fine, thank you.”

“It’s my Mother’s recipe, nothing beats a homemade meal,” Mandy’s smile never left her face, not even when you quickly dug into the fresh meal. “I’ll be back with your water.”

You were almost done with half of your food by the time she came back with a fresh glass of water, and you looked at her with a thankful smile when she placed it beside your plate. “Thank you,” You mumbled before furrowing your eyebrows. “Sorry, that’s gross.”

“No, no it’s cute, don’t worry.” She giggled, sitting in her own chair.

As she started digging into her meal, her eyes would flutter over at you, but you seem really into whatever it was that she made to notice the subtle flirtatious eyes she was making at you. It was delicious, and you loved food, so you couldn’t complain now could you? “This is really good,” You mumbled between chews.

“I’ll thank my mother for you when I see her again.” Mandy smiled.

“You might want to give me the recipe, it’s so good.”

“As much as I like you, I can’t do that, family recipe.” She smirked widely.

Mandy continued to eat her food, little moans of delight falling from her mouth with each bite she took, while you were suddenly falling into your own world. Mandy hadn’t seemed to notice you had stopped replying to what she was asking you, or just wanted to get the food out of the way before she continued. Either way, it didn’t seem to affect her much. All you could seriously think about was Abby, hoping that she had some source of something to keep her hoping and until you could find her.

“Are you okay? You’ve gone quiet,” Mandy murmured finally, finishing the final piece of her food. “Is it the food? Is it not sitting right with you?”

“No! No the food was amazing, m’just thinking, nothing to worry about.”

“Worried about what?”

“Just worried about Abby is all, like I said, nothing to worry about.” You smiled and wiped your face with the napkin you had on your lap.

You hadn’t noticed the way the smile on her face dropped and just stared at you. “Were you close? You and Abby?” She asked.

“Since we were babies pretty much,”

“That’s nice, nice to have someone close to you and that you can trust, I suppose.” Her voice suddenly got a little quieter, and nursed her glass of wine. “How do you know she didn’t just leave willingly?”

“Abby wouldn’t have left Jerry without a reason, she wouldn’t have left us, left me, without a reason.” You frowned, eyes focused on the empty plate before you. “She’s not the type of person to run away. Even when things are hard, she comes to me for help and she didn’t—”

“Was she in trouble?”

“Someone didn’t like her, threatened her, and I didn’t even know. If she told me, I could have helped her, kept her safe.”

“S’not your job to protect everyone,” Mandy smiled softly, watching you closely. “You know that right? You can’t save everyone, especially if they can’t even save themselves.” Her fingers graze yours on the top of the table, you weren’t even sure how or when she moved hers but when you felt them against yours, your eyes locked with hers. “Maybe Abby left because there are better things out there for her, or maybe she just wanted to see something new.”

“Without me?” The crack in your voice was evident.

“Anyone can leave if they truly need to or want to,” Her fingers continued to brush against yours with each word and you couldn’t even move. “People expect so much from people around here, we’re all trying to live, find someone, and get on with our lives, and sometimes that can be too much for one person to handle. Maybe Abby didn’t want to burden you with a thought she might have had.”

“Her burdens are mine,” You murmured. “Whatever she deals with, we deal with it together.”

Her hand retracted from yours quickly, once again you didn’t notice the scowl on her face, and grabbed your plate from in front of you as well as her own before making her way into the kitchen. “Would you like some dessert?” She asked, abandoning the conversation altogether.

“Oh, uh, sure?”

The light above flickered, making a soft buzzing sound as the room felt colder again. Sunlight wasn’t a luxury anymore, even if it was so desperately needed. Mold has started coming in quicker than before. Even the eerie darkness is something straight out of a nightmare. The only thing in the room that was noticeable was the small lamp on the floor, but even that wasn’t bright enough. It never was.

By the time Mandy came back with two bowls in her hands, you were standing by the bookshelf, running your fingers over the spines of what you can already tell are very old books. “Didn’t know you liked to read books?” You asked, looking over at her.

“Oh yeah! I love books, mostly the classics, but the thriller ones are my favorite. Could read them all day. I actually have to return those to Brenda soon, had them way too long.” She giggled and placed the bowls on the table. “What is your favorite?”

“The Shining.”

“Haven’t read it before, do you have a copy I could borrow?”

“Yeah sure, I’ll find it and give It to you.”

“Perfect, let’s eat dessert!”

“Glad you’re back in one piece,” Ellie was the first to comment when she noticed you walking into the bar an hour later. “Didn’t try to shove her tongue down your throat this time?”

“Like you tried with Abby that one time you got drunk?” You quipped back with a lazy grin and slumped into the chair beside her. “Nah, she just kept touching my hand, not trying to kiss me this time.”

“Oh? Are you lovebirds now?”

“Knock it off, El.” Jesse laughed and continued to sip his beer.

“No, you imbecile, she did get weird whenever I spoke about Abby though,” You shrugged, pinching some of Ellie’s chips. “Like, she just got up and went to get dessert?”

“She’s always been weird, so fuckin’ obsessed with you for a start.” It was Jesse this time.

“Really? I never got that vibe before,”

“You wouldn’t, you’re like so fucking oblivious to most shit,” Ellie snorted. “You didn’t even realize I was flirting with you when I first met you. Took you 4 months to say, Ellie, were you asking me on a date that one time? Oblivious.”

“In my defense, you fuckin’ flirt with everyone,” You defended with a soft laugh, and eyed up the pictures on the table. “What are you guys doing anyway?”

“Well, while you and Barbie were having your little date, me and Jesse were going through the rest of the pictures. Nothing has jumped out yet, but I do have a feeling something will point us in the right direction this time.”

“Right, pass us some then,”

“Of course your majesty.”

“Fuck off, man,” You snickered and snatched the pile from her hand. “Oh, you know the family that lives beside Mandy?”

“Huh? Beside Mandy?”

“Yeah, the family that lives next door?”

“No one has lived in that house for like 4 years,” Ellie blinked, confusion written all over her face.

“Oh, she said they were decorating or something earlier, there was banging and that’s what she told me.”

“Joel knows more than me about anyone, I’ll ask him later, see if anyone’s moved in since the other family,” Ellie promised with a tired smile.

“Thanks, El,” A chip that you flicked hit her in the chin and you held back a laugh when her eyes widened and she suddenly scowled at you. “Sorry, you looked like you needed something to cheer you up. Did you sleep much last night?”

“A few hours, better than none, right?” The smile she gave you didn’t reach her face. Everyone is like that lately and you sadly understood why. The community wasn’t exactly whole right now.

“Want to watch a movie tonight?” You suggested as you ate some more chips.

“What one?”

“Uhm, you pick, I don’t mind which one.”

“Don’t wanna freak anyone out or anything,”

“What is it?”

“There’s someone in the background of the picture you and Abby took the night before, well, you know, you can’t see much but It’s someone for sure,” Jesse mumbled and slid the picture over to you.

The background is blurry, you notice that much at first but as you squint your eyes just a little more, a black silhouette is something you can pick out. Standing behind what you can only assume Is one of the trees just across the ways of the pond both you and Abby spent a lot of time at. “It’s too dark, I can’t fucking pick out who it is,” You huffed. “Do you think It might be who threatened her?”

“And risk getting caught when she’s with you? Knowing damn well you’d knock their teeth out?” Ellie laughed.

“Anything’s possible, El.”

“Let’s say this is them, how do we find out who it is?”

“Could host a small get-together tomorrow night here, remembering Abby or something, and we all write something for her, see if someone slips up and exposes themselves?” Jesse suggests, looking between you and Ellie.

“It could work,” Both you and Ellie answered at the same time. “But how would we know who it is if they turn up and say something bad?”

“No idea, but we’ll figure it out as we go. Haven’t we always done that?” He smiled and pushed the rest of the pictures which were of no use back into the box before putting the lid on. “We’ve always had each other's back, that’s not going to change.”

“I’ll do whatever It takes If It means we’re one step closer to finding Abby.” You agreed.

“Alright, you’ve pulled my leg, I’m in too.” Ellie dramatically huffed but the smile on her lips gave her away. “Let’s watch that sappy romance movie,”

“Which one?”

“Abby’s favorite.”

“You, Ellie Williams, want to watch Love Actually? Willingly?”

“Why are you saying my name like that?! Yes, let’s watch it.” She scoffed and slapped the back of your head when she stood up. “Besides, you and Abby can bully me all you want for wanting to watch it when she’s back with us.”

“She’ll never let you live it down, you know what right?”

“Yeah, but It’s worth It, she is too.” Ellie winked.

—

The following evening dawned on you quicker than you would have liked. All of you were on edge. The picture, the missing charms, the truth that someone didn’t like Abby had you, Ellie and Jesse looking around the bar with caution.

The remembrance of Abby had the all clear, everyone helped and chipped in where they could. Jerry was over the moon when you told him that you guys were doing this for her. Maybe in hopes that it would bring you one step closer, or maybe one step closer to her coming home.

Thursday, 6th June 2015

“Abby, you look beautiful, why are you panicking?” Abby was sitting on the edge of her bed, fumbling with her bracelet yet not looking at you. “Hey, Abs, what’s up?” You crouched in front of her and took her hands into yours with a soft smile.

“I don’t feel beautiful,” She admitted sadly.

“Oh, Abby, you are beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful, your soul is perfect and stunning. You are the most beautiful person in the world. Your hair is beautiful, your smile is beautiful, your pretty eyes are stunning,” Her sniffle caused you to pause, reach your hand up and wipe it away. “Everything about you is beautiful.”

“Really?”

Cupping her face between your hands, you press you lips against her forehead and smile. “Yes, really, you are so fuckin’ beautiful.” You whispered into her skin. “I promise, love.”

How could you not see the pain she was holding back, behind the little glint in her eye?

“To Abby!”

Jerry’s voice brought you back to reality, smiled at everyone who raised a glass in her honor and nodded to himself as he walked down the small steps. “Thank you for coming,” He murmured to a few of the older couples who gave him a gentle hug and a soft reassurance. “I know that Abby would have loved to see you guys together again.”

On edge, you looked around the bar slowly, trying to pick out anyone that was acting weird or unusually suspicious. That’s how you looked at most people these days, picking them out one by one, wondering if they had done or said anything to Abby the night she vanished. You spotted Ellie doing the same on the other side of the room, taking small unsuspicious glances at everyone who came in and left. “Here,”

To your left, Jesse was holding a beer towards you, which you took with a soft thank you, and leaned against the wall with you. “Anyone catch your eye yet?”

“Not yet, everyone seems to be kind, and talking to Jerry, cheering him up and stuff,” You mumbled between sips, eyes still moving around as each person moves around before you. “I don’t think they would hide, we know most people here, if anyone’s missing, we’ll know.”

“And if they do choose to miss something that is important to the community, then they are hiding something.” Jesse added.

“Exactly, I don’t think they’re stupid enough to let it slip, know that we know something.”

“Did that guy who told you she was arguing with someone tell you anything else or?”

“Deadend, he just smiles at me all weird like now when I see him.” You grimaced and took a big gulp of your beer.

“It’s that friendly smile you have.”

“Eat a dick.” You laughed.

In the middle of the bar, there was a box, which gave people to write notes, poems, or even just one word, so that when Abby did come back home, she would have kind things to read, and hopefully it would be able to cheer everyone else up when they read a few of them nearing the end of the night. You thought the idea was a good one when Jerry asked you about it this morning. He enjoyed having your input when it came to his daughter.

You wrote something simple, not overdone, but a little i miss you and i love you more than anything. It meant more than anything, Abby would know that if she was here right now, reading them. You always noticed the way she would blush and look away when you would tell her you love her before you either hung up after being on a phone call with her for hours, or even when you left her house. “I love you.” You murmured, folded the piece of paper and pressed you lips to it.

Ellie smiled from across the room.

She always found it amusing it took you years to know you were indeed madly in love with your best friend.

“Hey,”

You almost gave yourself whiplash with how fast you turned around to find Dina looking at you and nervously fumbling with her fingers. “Dina, hey,” You smiled awkwardly.

“Do you hate me? It would make sense if you did, with how I pulled away from you all, but with Abby going missing, I just got scared, and being around you guys made me miss her so much.” Dina rushed out.

“I don’t hate you,” You reassured her quietly. “I understand though, it’s okay, we all deal with it differently, but I don’t hate you, none of us do.”

“Is Ellie okay?” She asked hesitantly.

“I don’t think so, but she’s getting there,” You admitted truthfully. “You should talk to her.”

“Wouldn’t that be awkward?”

“Nothing’s awkward unless you make it awkward.” You winked with a soft laugh.

“Right, I’ll go and see her, if she starts freaking out, you should probably come over or something.” Dina smiled.

“Will do.”

If it wasn’t for the fact you were already looking at Ellie, you would have had a stroke when you heard the loud crashing of her falling off the chair when she noticed Dina making her way towards her. Snorting under your breath, you shook your head, pushed yourself off the wall and made a beeline straight for the beer. “Usual?” Elaine, the older woman who took over the bar after her husband passed, smiled when you were quick to nod and slump yourself against the counter. “You look tired, you sleepin’?”

“When I can, which isn’t much,” You mumbled softly with a subtle shrug. “But what can you do? Sleep is the last thing I need right now.”

“Maybe you need just a little bit to find her.”

Pushing the beer into your direction, she laughed at the way your lips parted as you grabbed it; ready to ask her how she knew. “Jerry told me earlier when he came here to set up. It’s a good thing, you know? Abby adored you, and I know how much you care about her.”

“I seem to be getting nowhere when I feel like m’finally getting somewhere.”

“There’s more out there than meets the eye, Honey,” Elaine smiled. “You just have to look closer.”

“What do you—”

“Y/N?” Jerry called out.

God fucking damn it.

At his voice, you turn your body slightly, almost stiffly and raise an eyebrow at him. You quietly excuse yourself from the conversation you got yourself into with Elaine when he waved you over, and took a couple of strides towards him, placing your almost empty bottle of beer on the table beside you. “What’s up?”

“I was just going through some of the notes, you know, the ones people left for Abs, and I found this. What does it mean?” He explained, slightly rushed and shoved a piece of paper into your hands with worry written all over his face. “Did someone hurt her? Take her from me? Why?”

Your eyebrows furrow as you look down at the slip of paper in your hands, looking back up at him confused. “What is it?”

“Read it, It’ll make more sense if you see it.”

Doing as you’re told, you don’t have time to acknowledge the small fact that your hands start to tremble as you unfold the little note with caution. Your lips part, body tensing as your eyes widen as you read over the note slowly. Not fully understanding. “Someone put this here?” You asked, voice cracking. “When?”

“I’m not sure, so many people have been leaving notes. I wouldn’t have been able to catch who.” Jerry shook his head, and gripped the edge of the table tightly. “If someone’s hurt her, m’gonna kill them. M’gonna kill them, Y/N”

“Not before us,” You murmured, already looking around the room. “Who was in charge of the box?”

“Me, and a couple of others, but this is the only bad one.”

“You’ve looked at the rest?”

“Of course.”

“Alright, put it somewhere else, out of sight from everyone. If this is the only bad one, then it’s possible they’re just trying to scare us, making up a lie about what’s happened to her. She’s fine, okay? Abby is strong, and we’re gonna find her.” You nodded. You weren’t sure who you were trying to reassure more, you or Jerry? Both of you? The whole town?

“What are you going to do?” He blinked.

“Figure it out. That’s what m’gonna do.”

The night rushed along slowly as you, and a bunch of others made your way out of the bar, cigarette hanging between your lips and a cold beer in your hands. The note played on your mind angrily, eating and chewing away at your brain, almost trying to claw its way out of your head as you inhaled hit after hit of your cigarette. Who here hates Abby enough to hurt her? Take her away? She was nice to everyone, always offering to help someone who needed it, never letting the older people carry stuff too heavy, Abby wouldn’t hurt a fly, so why would they feel the need to hurt her? Take her away from where she loves? From the people she adores? It doesn't make sense.

The longer you stood there, practically taking Ellie’s thought into consideration, pulling out cigarette after cigarette, the darkness seemed to loom and lurk more creepy than any other night. Almost like it was mocking you, judging you from afar as you tried to wrap your head around everything. Even the journal pages still don’t make sense to you and it’s been over a week since the first. It’s like she left, and suddenly you’re trying to figure out a really fucked up riddle in order to get you prize, the prize being Abby once everything slots into place like a puzzle.

“Let’s get you home, Honey. Night time around here has become a little scarier than before.” You spot a mother wrapping her daughter up on her scarf and jacket before holding onto her hand tightly after she places a kiss on her forehead. “Stay close to Mommy and you’ll be okay, alright?”

You wish Abby stayed close to you.

You watch the family walk away down the path, the lights casting a shadow around them. Like a possessed child, the shadow like a demon hanging on by a thread as they were no longer in your peripheral each step they took until they were around the corner. Gone just like Abby.

As you dropped your cigarette on the ground, you caught something behind one of the trees when you looked back up, lurking in the darkness and your body suddenly tensed on the spot. Did Abby feel like this? Did she feel like her entire soul left her body when she knew someone was watching her? Following her?

“Hey!” You shouted, dropping your bottle in the process as you walked over to them, or trying to. It seemed like you had slightly spooked them, not aware you were staring right at them. “Hey!” This time you started running as you saw the rustle of the leaves, the snapping of twigs under their feet. “Stop running away!” You called out, pushing the branches out of your way.

Were you really doing this right now? Running after someone who could easily just kill you?

In your eyes, you could see the outline of their figure under the moonlight, shimming between trees, jumping over tree’s that’ve been left to fend for themselves over the years, and even though the pain and burn in your legs were starting to ache more and more the longer you ran after them, you couldn’t stop. You needed to do this no matter the outcome. “Stop running away from me!” You shouted, jumping over the same tree as they did. “I just want to talk! That’s all! Stop fuckin’ running!” You huffed.

You didn’t see the branch hanging in front of you, or the rock on the floor, not until tripped, your face smacked into the branch harshly and landed on the floor with a loud thud. “Fuck,” You groaned, cupping your nose quickly with a wince. “Fuck!” You yelled, spitting out the dirt.

Rolling yourself over slowly, you puffed out a sigh as your eyes fluttered open; the midnight sky lurked down at you, almost inviting it to eat you whole. If it could reach out and grab you, you would be the darkness’s first victim. The chitter of insects in between the long grass had your ears perking up as you sat up. Cupping the back of your head, you hissed and screwed your eyes shut tightly and pulled yourself up off the floor.

Looking around, even though it was no use and they were probably gone already, you stumbled towards one of the trees and leaned against it tiredly. But all things turn you angry at some point.

All you could really think about the fact you still hadn’t found Abby the longer you slumped yourself there, and that was enough to anger you enough until you repeatedly punched at the oak, over and over again until your knuckles were completely red, bits of wood stuck in your skin, but you didn’t care, if you don’t have Abby, what was the point?

“Fuck you!” Your scream echoed eerily.

The flap of bird wings rang out loudly around you.

It took you an hour to trek back to the town. You held your hand against your chest, your nose stung like a bitch but this was the last thing on your mind as you stumbled your way through the crowds of drunk people, not giving you a single glance or worrying about the fact your nose was still bleeding, you probably broke a few knuckles. “Jess, have you seen Y/N?” You heard Ellie’s voice but couldn’t see her.

“Y/N? No, I haven’t seen her for a couple hours, now that I’m thinking about it.”

“Shit, alright, uhm,”

The sound of loud crashing caused both of them to look straight at you as you stumbled over one of the tables. “I think we found her?” Jesse laughed.

“Shit, Y/N?” Ellie’s eyes widened at the sight of your bloody nose and rushed over to your side; not before watching you struggle 4 times to stand on your feet. “Fuck, what the fuck happened to you?” She scoffed, pulling you up carefully.

“Someone,” You groaned and slumped your head against her shoulder. “Someone was watching, through the trees, ran after them but hit my head, broke my nose, I think? And then I lost them, so I punched a tree, I think my knuckles are broken.” You explained with a slight slur in your voice. “But m’fine, just need to sit down for a second.”

“That’s a lot of I thinks, we can’t leave you alone for five fuckin’ minutes.” Ellie muttered under her breath and wrapped her arm around your waist tightly. “Let’s get you to mine, Joel’s out with Tommy so he won’t ask questions.”

With the help of her and Jesse, you made it to Ellie’s house in one piece, well minus your dignity that the tree smacked out of you, but you still made it without another fall. They had managed to patch up your knuckles, and stopped the bleeding of your nose, ignoring every curse and wince that fell from between your bloody lips; telling you that it was your own fault for going without some kind of help or backup. “So who did you see?” Jesse asked, dropping the dirty rags in the bin and turning to face you again.

“I was drinking my beer, and then I saw someone behind the trees, if this is the same person who was watching Abby, I can tell you it would have freaked anyone out—”

“Says the one who ran after them.” Ellie scoffed from beside you.

“You were talkin’ to Dina, and Jesse was, well Jesse was where he usually goes, which is where? I don’t know.” You glared at the pair of them. “But m’here, no?”

“Luckily.” Ellie sighed and pulled the tissue from out of your nose carefully. “What if something else seriously bad happened to you? And no one was there to get you?”

“M’not going anywhere—”

“You don’t fuckin’ know that! You can’t just disappear without telling one of us. That’s not fair.”

The panic and worry in Ellie’s eyes is something you haven’t seen since Abby went missing. She didn’t talk about how she felt, but her eyes and face did, which is why your shoulder sagged and you nodded slowly. “I know, El, m’sorry, okay?” You smiled sadly.

“For what it’s worth, this whole look—” She pointed to your entire face with a laugh. “Is so worth it. M’gonna tell Abby you risked breaking your knuckles and nose for her.”

“And she’ll ignore me for a week—”

“A week? She will ignore you for a solid 5 seconds before she’s asking you to cuddle her.” Jesse laughed with a slow head shake. “Did you find anything else out? Minus the dumb injuries?”

“There’s one thing Jerry showed me.”

“What is it?”

Reaching into your back pocket with a quiet groan, you pulled the slip of paper out and handed it to Ellie, who was watching you closely. “That’s all that happened tonight.”

Unfolding it, exactly like you did earlier tonight, Ellie’s eyebrows furrow into a tight frown almost and nothing comes out of her mouth when opens it and instead she looks back at you with wide eyes. “This happened tonight?”

“Let me see,” Jesse held his hand out and took it from her. His eyes widen too. “How didn’t we notice? How many people were going to that box?”

“M’not sure.”

Does a domino effect really have to happen in my life? You thought.

Ellie, who’s usually the one to be the first to ask what’s next, doesn’t do that, instead she looks at you and frowns. “You need to rest, If Jesse has to leave, I can figure out what’s next for this sudden murder club search party, but you need to get some sleep, and I won’t take no for an answer. Got it?”

“El—”

“I said got it?”

Slumping against the bed, you simply nodded like a lost puppy and folded your arms over your chest, completely forgetting about your broken knuckles you winced. “Fine, but if you find anything, wake me up, yeah? Please?”

“If you’re knocked out cold, then no, but I will if you aren’t.”

“The tree already knocked her out cold” Jesse chimed in with a sudden laugh.

“Both of you go fuck yourself!”

Brenda, poor woman was reading through one of her own books, jolted in her spot and looked up when the bell on the door rang, and held back a sigh at the sight of you and Ellie stumbling in through the small door with curses and grumbles. “Brenda! My favourite lady!”

“Ellie, may I remind you of the time you almost broke my window? we aren’t even acquaintances”

“I paid for it to be fixed, didn’t I?!” Ellie moaned and kicked the floor childishly. “Can we look at that book you keep when people loan or bring back books? We have something we want to compare,”

“For?”

“Just something we are working on, please? It’ll only take a couple minutes,” Your friend begged, leaned over the counter and pouted. “I will even ask Joel if he will take you on that date!”

“Date?! Excuse me—”

“You’re in love with Joel, do this for me, and then I’ll get you that date with him”

“Fine, but don’t knock anything over like last time, It took me an hour to fix everything.” She scowled and walked away.

“You’re the best!” Ellie shouted after her.

The flight flickered on, and the sounds of loud banging could wake anyone up, even the small insects that lurk in the long grass outside in the wilderness. “Need to take these back, hope you enjoyed those pathetic reads.” They mumbled, snatching the books from the dirty floor and scoffed. “Don’t understand what’s so special about them or you. Also, I can't afford to borrow anymore so this is the last of them for you.”

Just as fast it went on, the light was gone and it felt even colder once the door slammed shut.

Hunching over the counter, Ellie spots the thick yet old book and grabs it with both hands, a soft grunt slipping past her lips before pulling it over the counter and dropping it on the oak, the loud bang causing you to flinch and flick her ear. “Ow!”

“That’s for trying to give me a heart attack.” You scoffed and slapped her shoulder. “So this was your big plan? Look through the names until one stands out?”

“Yeah or until we find one that matches, I guess?”

“Brenda, I know i’m late with returning these books but— Hey!” Mandy halted in her steps mid way through the door when she spotted you and Ellie leaning on the counter, looking through something. “Loaning another book, Y/N?”

“Oh, no not today, just finding something for Joel.” You lied, Ellie almost snickering behind her hand at your blatant lie. “You read them already?”

“Oh yeah! I had some free time after you left last night, really enjoyed them”

“What was your favourite?”

The question caught her off guard as her lips formed into a pout as she thought about it. “Uh, I really liked Pride and Prejudice, the others were boring but that one was amazing.”

No one in this town apart from me and Abby love that book. You thought.

“Ah, well m’glad you enjoyed it. Do you still want to borrow my copy of the shining?”

Mandy chewed her inner cheek before nodding a little too quickly and smiled again. “Yeah, of course! Those stupid neighbors finally stopped decorating so I can probably get a night in to read some of it!”

“Mandy, hello Love.” Brenda appeared with a mug in her hand and a plate of biscuits. “Returning them already? That was fast.”

Placing the stack of books on the counter, Mandy simply gave her a warm smile, one that was slowly starting to creep you out, and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “Can’t afford to borrow anymore for a while, my brain is fried with all the stories I’ve read this week.”

“No worries, Honey, just sign in the books you borrowed and they’ll be more for you next time when you do want to read again. Girls, can she use that for a second and then you can get back to whatever you were doing.”

“A date is on the line, Brenda, don’t rush me”

“I’ll rush you both out of that door,” Brenda smirked and the words died in throat once Ellie nodded her head quickly, picked up the book and practically shoved it in shocked Mandy’s hand with a stutter of words. “Thank you.”

“Do you have a pen I could borrow?”

Reaching for the one beside you, you hold it out towards her, which she takes with a soft thank you, places the book back on the counter and doodles her name onto the sheet of paper. “Thank you again, Brenda. You always have a really good selection of books!”

“You’re more than welcome, Love.”

“See you later, Y/N?”

“What’s happening later?” Ellie eyed her.

“It’s that party thing, dunno if m’going though,” You smile and shoved your hands into your pockets. “If I do, I assume you’re going?”

“Yes! The only time I get to be free and myself, I guess. So I’ll be there. If you do change your mind and come, I’ll see you there?”

“For sure.” Another tight lipped smile.

Mandy took her leave not long after, leaving you and Ellie to your little search once more and Brenda took herself into a little corner of the shop to what you could only assume was to read one of her books. “Now that she’s gone,” Ellie trailed off.

Opening the book again, you brush your fingers down the list of people until it lands on hers; furrowing your eyebrows when you look at the book in front of you again, you lean your face closer and look at the signature a little longer, for far too long until you’re shoving your hand in your back pocket, rummaging around for the slip of paper you and Ellie took last night. “What are you doing?” Ellie laughed, watching you struggle.

Pride and Prejudice ………………………… Mandy ♡

“Look at her name,” You murmured, pulling the slip of paper out.

“Whos? Mandy’s?”

“The way she’s spelt it.”

Once you unfolded the paper, your eyes flickered between the slip between your fingers, and the name in the book, Ellie doing the same, having to lean over you. “Wait,” She paused, snatching it from you and taking a look for herself.

Ellie looks at her name, and then at the note again;

ABBY DESERVED WHAT SHE GOT. ♡

“Did she just—”

“The fuckin’ heart, Ellie.”

“Wait, is she really that fucking insane?” Ellie looked at the slip still in shock. “Are you joking me? She’s been under our nose this entire time?”

“So, the banging I heard?”

“Wasn’t anyone fucking decorating that’s for sure.”

“Before we jump to conclusions, let’s just go get something to eat, m’starving, and go through what we have. Anyone could write hearts next to their name.”

“In the exact same way she does it? I doubt it.” Ellie murmured, tore the page out of the book quickly and stuffed it in her jacket pocket. Glaring at your stare. “What? Brenda won’t fuckin’ miss it.”

Shuffling out of the door, you and Ellie spot Mandy happily skipping away, and the sight has your friend scowling ad mumbling incoherently under her breath, “Why’s she so fuckin’ happy all the time? Has she never dealt with sadness or hurt in her life?”

Nudging her shoulder with yours as you both walk, you shook your head. “Apparently not. Look at me, depressed as fuck.”

“Same,” Ellie looked at you before you both burst out into a laugh. “Man, if she’s somehow done anything to be the reason Abby went missing, m’gonna kill her. You know that right? I don’t care what you say, I’ll do it.”

“Ellie—”

“No, whoever took Abby from us, is going six feet under. You can’t stop me.”

“Let’s feed you, that monster is hungry—”

“Y/N, m’not joking, this isn’t a joke—”

“I know, and that’s what’s scaring me right now, Ellie.”

Pushing past you with a grumble at your words, Ellie’s quick to find a seat in the far corner, out of the way from people, and ushers you to hurry up. “I’ll be right with you, Honey, just have to get a few orders out of the way.” The old woman smiled from behind the counter.

“No worries!”

Unzipping your jacket, and placing it on the back of your chair, you sit down opposite Ellie and really look at her. She’s frowning, which means she’s deep in thought again, and that only means she’s planning something, something that you aren’t sure is supposed to scare you or make you happy. The bags under her eyes are much darker than they were last week, so that’s a clue she’s not been sleeping no matter how many times she’s told you she has been. Her lips are in a tight line. Even her smile lines are vanishing. “And then I think— Why are you lookin’ at me like that?” She mumbled, catching you staring.

“S’nothing, you just look exhausted,” You offered a soft smile. “What are we eating?”

“I’ll just share with you, order whatever.”

Ellie was always a picky eater, well she says she is but always steals any of the food you make or buy, and went with something simple when it was your turn to order food; a bowl of chips, salsa and a chicken sandwich. “—And then we have the note, if that crazy psycho took the book out last week, then Abby’s alive, which means she has to be here somewhere, and we’re just not looking hard enough—”

“The woman at the bar, who got me a beer, told me that we need to look closer, so you might be right,” You nodded, munching on your chips. “She might know something, but doesn’t want to get too close to it, I don’t blame her, this whole thing has been freakin’ me the fuck out.”

“So Abby’s here somewhere?” Ellie took a handful of chips and ate them slowly. “That’s what we’re going with?”

“Yeah, but where? We know this place like the back of our hands. We would have found her already by now.”

“That’s where m’confused because I don’t know. I have no idea where she could be—”

“Y/N, Ellie! I’m so glad I found you guys!” Brenda’s voice rings out.

The pair of you turn in your seats, and look at her with your mouths full with food, and staring like a deer in headlights. “Brenda, miss us already? It’s been 30 minutes.” You coughed, swallowed your food and wiped your face. “What’s wrong?” You asked when you noticed her worried look.

“There’s something you need to see, I haven’t told anyone else yet, apart from you guys.” She rushed out, pulling a book out of her bag and placing it on the table. “I was going through them, like I always do just to make sure she didn’t rip any of the pages, some people have done it, and I found this.”

“Pride and Prejudice?” You blinked.

“Just look at the back. please.”

Looking over at Ellie, who was just watching with confusion written all over her face and still eating, you open the book and skip through the pages, until you’re on the last page before the back. “Did you hide spiders here? To scare me?” You laughed nervously.

“It’s about Abby.” Was all she could stutter out.

Once the words fell from her mouth, your hands dropped the book on the final page, and all of you looked down at it. Staring at it like the horribly written words were going to jump out of the page and eat you. “She took this book out last week.”

M….Mandy

Crazy…

Abby

“Is that—” Ellie swallowed and locked eyes with you. “She’s still—”

“Alive.”

“So what’s the plan?” Ellie mumbled into your ear, the 3 of you watching a very happy Mandy dancing with her friends, and snatched your beer from your hand. “We corner her?”

“Not here,” You shook your head. “Too obvious. She would see it coming.”

“You think she knows we know?” Jesse asked.

“I don’t think so, If she knows that we know, I don’t think she would have shown up tonight,” You grabbed a handful of chips and shoved them into your mouth. “Besides, this way, we can observe her, try catching her saying or doing anything that could expose her.”

“We’ve been looking through so much shit for the last month, why can’t I just hit her?” Ellie grumbled and slumped in the chair like a scolded child with a pout on her face.

“Look what happened to Y/N when she went against a tree,”

“Jesse! Stop bringin’ up that fucking tree.” You groaned and threw your head back.

“It’s funny!” He laughed.

“Your poor nose didn’t think so,” Ellie cooed playfully and kissed your cheek. “Don’t tell Abby, she will actually kill me for that.”

“Leave my nose alone!”

Amongst your conversation with your friends, you hadn’t notice Mandy walking over to your table until she slid into the empty chair beside Jesse and that’s when all the laughter died down. “Who died?” She giggled, words slightly slurred. “I’m just coming to see how you are doing.”

“M’good,”

“Been better.”

“I think I’m gonna get another drink, Ellie? Y/N? You guys want anything?”

“Two beers!” Ellie cheered.

Fumbling with the bowl of chips, your eyes flicker between Jesse at the bar, and Mandy who was happily sipping her drink through a straw, not worried about the fact you were either about to lose your shit, or throw a chair at her. “So, how’s the search going?”

“S’fine,” You shrugged, not wanting to give her too much without her catching on that you knew. “Keep hitting deadends, but it’s fine besides that.”

“You’re smart, you’ll figure it out.”

Ellie makes a face of disgust at her, her need and want to just throw something at this girl gets stronger every time she opens her mouth with something ridiculous. “Is Jesse making the beers or something? Why is he taking so long?”

“Ellie, half the town is here,” You laughed and threw a chip at her. “Be patient.”

“It’s hard to have that when you live here.” She grumbled and leant her head on your shoulder. “Wake me up when he’s back.”

“You got it, El.” You laughed.

You hadn’t expected her to actually fall asleep, but when you feel her body slumping more into your side not even 10 minutes later, you’re quick to wrap your arm around her to stop her from falling off the chair and onto the floor. Nor do you notice the look of annoyance on Mandy’s face, still sipping her drink. “I would have guessed Jerry would have been helping you search for Abby. Did you say that was her name?”

The question catches you off guard, slightly offended she even thought of it let alone asked it; Jerry spent countless months of time over several months searching for her. Never eating or sleeping, he stayed awake in hopes she would walk through the door at any given moment. “How long have you lived here?” You found yourself asking and cocking your head to the side.

“How long have I lived here? Oh, since I was like 8 or 9. Why?”

“Then you’d know we look out for our own. Same thing happened when a little boy went missing for 3 days when I turned 16, we all went looking for him and brought him home when we found him. It doesn’t matter if we have distaste or disagreements with someone, if something happens in our community, we help each other, we search, and we don’t rest until we find them.” You explained slowly, eyeing her up. “Jerry doesn’t sleep, just because you don’t see him asking every single person where his daughter is, doesn’t mean he’s not looking. Jerry would kill everyone in his way to get to his daughter. That’s how much he gives a shit about her. We all do.”

“Would you?” It’s like your words didn’t phase her.

“Would I what?”

“Kill someone to get her?”

Looking down at Ellie, your eyebrow raises just slightly, and it’s back to normal before she can blink and when you chuckle, her skin crawls. “S’not me they should be worried about. When we find whoever took her, m’gonna have to keep Ellie on a tight leash or she’ll be like a rabid dog looking for something to chew,” You paused and inhaled deeply when your eyes met. “But I would, if you want the truth. I would kill anyone if it meant I could have Abby back.”

“Do you have it in you?”

“If the right person fucks with my family, yeah,” The smirk you gave her caused Mandy to shift around in her seat comfortably. A sense of terror seeps into the cracks of her skin and travels up her spine. “I wouldn’t hesitate to put a bullet between their fuckin’ eyes, unless Ellie gets to it before I do.”

“Make it seem like a horror movie.” She giggled.

“I think we’re scarier than anything in a horror movie you’ve seen before, Mandy.”

On a note, she hadn’t realised or seemed to have noticed just how bold and eerie you got when you would bluntly stare. Like Ellie, Mandy never understood what you were thinking about when sitting there, zoning out like a zombie. At some points she expects to start seeing cartoon bubbles with those pictures appearing by the side of your head. “What’s the scariest movie you’ve seen?”

“The life m’fucking livin’. That’s what.”

“Your life isn’t that—”

A tray of beers enters your vision as you look up to find Jesse side eyeing Mandy, and then looking at a sleeping Ellie on your shoulder. “At least she’s sleeping. What were you guys talking about?” He asked, wrapping his lips around the bottle and gulping down the liquid.

“I was just telling Mandy that m’not afraid to kill whoever took Abby from us.”

“Remember when you tried to kill that guy who stole your chips a while back?” Jesse smirked, subtly waiting for Mandy’s reaction.

“For stealing chips?” She choked out, pushing her chair out, picking up her almost empty glass and rising to her feet.

“Oh yeah, the guy’s terrified of me.” You smiled.

“I would have been too if you tried to kill me for taking your chips. I need to get another drink. Speaking of, do you want more chips?”

“You’re alright, your friends look like they miss you”

“They’re all drunk, but I’ll see you.”

Once she left, you finally let out a laugh. “Really Jesse? When did I try to kill a man for stealing my chips?” You shook your head and took your beer.

“I tried to see if it would get a reaction out of her, not sure if it worked though,” He shrugged, once again taking a longer glance at Ellie. “Has she been asleep for a long?”

“Not a long time, but she just fell asleep when she came over here, I thought she was joking until she practically fell into me and I don’t have it in me to wake her up, not when she’s barely slept much since we started all this.” You murmured and rubbed her back slowly.

“I can hear you both talking, stop being so loud.” Ellie grumbled against your shoulder and peeled her eyes open slowly. “Is she gone? Can I get the fuck up now?”

“Were you fakin’ that?” Your hand slapped the back of her head gently; which she laughed at when she sat up completely. “After tonight, you’re getting at least 15 hours sleep.”

“Says you, you haven’t slept in like 10 years.”

“I take naps when needed”

“Not enough, those dark circles under your eyes finally match that bruised nose.”

“Enough with my nose! And the tree!” You warned when Jesse opened his mouth. “Let me live it down for fuck sake.”

“I don’t think I can, the story was hilarious,” The brunette smirked, hands running down her face as she yawned into the palm of her hand. “So, did she start freaking out when Jesse said you tried to kill someone?”

“Not like we hoped.”

Once the clock hit 11pm, Ellie was the first to notice Mandy slipping out of the doors, with a few of her friends following closely behind. “She’s leaving, let’s go.”

“Go where?”

“Following her. She wrote the note, she doesn’t fuckin’ read books, she can’t even read the fact you aren’t interested in her, and she’s obsessed with you for a reason none of us know. She knows something, if you don’t want to follow her, I’ll go alone.” Ellie rambled on and she jumped to her feet.

“Like fuck you’re going alone. Jesse open your mouth about a certain something, I will hit you.” You warned again, looking at him with a harsh glare. “Not a single word about it ever again, you guys got it?”

“I was just going to say that Abby owes you two kisses for the black eye you got.” He smiled innocently. “Risked your whole face for her. Props to you.”

“Can we talk about you and Abby flirting after?”

“Right, let’s go then.”

You kept your distance, not wanting to give anything away. A part of you did feel slightly uncomfortable with the fact you were literally following someone, but the other part of your brain was screaming at you. She knows what happened to Abby. She knows something. It wasn’t like you could ignore that gnawing feeling in your mind. “What are we going to do if we find something?” Ellie asked, huddling close to you.

“I guess we’ll cross that bridge when we get to it?” You murmured with each cautious step. “If she’s as crazy as that note proves then we can’t just throw ourselves at her and attack her.”

Hiding behind the tree when she suddenly drops her purse, Ellie grabs onto the back of your shirt tightly as you all watch Mandy scrambling to pick it up and stumbling her way up the path towards her house; almost tripping over in the process and if it wasn’t for the fact your hand quickly came up and cupped Ellie’s mouth, the laugh she let out would have gotten you all caught. “Shut the fuck up.” You warned.

“Yes, Boss.”

“Ellie’s gonna be the reason we all die.” Jesse grumbled, sneakily running over towards the other tree that was closer to her house. “I think she’s gone in the house now, you can move.” He waved you over, still looking at the window.

“Don’t laugh, or you’ll get us caught.”

“God, I won’t laugh again unless she falls out of the fuckin’ door.” Ellie grumbled from behind you, still using your body as a shield. “Or hits a tree—”

“Ellie, I will tie you to a tree and leave you out here. I said don’t bring it up.”

“C’mon, you and that tree have a pure love relationship now.”

“M’gonna tell Joel about what you did with that girl behind his house if you don’t shut your mouth right now.” You warned, turning to look at her.

“You wouldn’t.”

“I would, now shut the hell up.”

Stalking up the steps quietly, you keep your hold on Ellie tight when she stumbles up one of the steps and Jesse was the one who had to place his hand over her mouth this time when she went to yelp. “Do not get us caught, Ellie, I’ll never forgive you.”

From here, you could see Mandy in the kitchen, filling her glass up with whatever she chose to drink tonight, taking a sip as she leant against the counter and her shoulders sagged. That sudden loud banging had you all flinching in your spots and Mandy straightened herself up. “Quit it! You do that all the fuckin time, it’s driving me nuts!”

“She’s already nuts,” Ellie’s voice muffled behind Jesse’s hand.

“Should have killed you when I had the damn chance, but no! Everyone gives too much of a shit about you!”

Carefully, without dropping Ellie or causing Jesse to fall over, your hand lightly grips onto the door handle, squeezing your eyes shut tightly as you turn it just enough to hear a soft click. “Let’s go.” You whispered, removing your hold reluctantly and stood up.

Pushing the door open wildly, Mandy stumbled back, almost falling over the table when You, Ellie and Jesse stormed in through her front door. “Y/N?”

“Where the fuck is she!?” You’re suddenly in her face in a flash and fists balled up by your sides.

“What happened to not throwing ourselves at her and attacking her?” Ellie grumbled quietly from beside Jesse under her breath.

“I don’t— I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Mandy stammered, eyes wide and glossy.

“Oh, you don’t?” You laughed sarcastically and shook your head. “You know exactly what m’fucking talking about.”

“I really don’t—”

“You can drop the innocent act, you insane little bitch.” Ellie seethed from beside you.

“Y/N, I really don’t know what you’re talking about.” Mandy sobbed, backed into a corner and not knowing an escape route.

Her breath hitched and she gasped when you’re suddenly gripping her face between your hands tightly; looking down at her angrily. Angrier than she’s ever seen before. “No? Then fuck what fuck is this?”

The sheet of paper hits her square in the chest, and Mandy scrambles to catch it, her shaky hands fumble to open it, and as her eyes catch onto what’s on the page, you finally see the way her jaw clenches and her face relaxes. “She never deserved you,” She scoffed, finally letting her guard down. “That stupid little bitch deserved everything that happened.”

“The fuck did you say?”

“She had it coming. If she didn’t keep taking you away from me, telling you to ignore me, blowing off our dates—”

“We went on one date!”

“A date she kept telling you to miss, always listening to her, doing what she tells you, with her out of the way I could have you to myself.” She grinned.

Leaning closer to her, you laughed in her face. “You still have nothing,” You murmured with a grimace. “This makes me hate you more.”

“No you don’t, you don’t hate me.” Mandy shook her head and plastered on a smile. “No,”

“Are you fucking stupid?” Ellie blinked, eyes going between you and then Mandy. “You’re fucking crazy, obsessive, who would love that?”

“Dina loved you, didn’t she, Ellie, takes one obsessive bitch to know another?”

“Hey,” Jesse warned, stepping in front of Ellie. “Keep her name out of your mouth.”

“Ah yes, Jesse, the other one. How does it feel knowing she loved you both yet still broke up with you when she had her fill?”

“Shut the fuck up,”

“Where is Abby?” You glared and gripped her face harder. “Tell me where she is!”

“She’s gone! She was never here, I took care of her for us!”

“There is no us!”

The fact she’s not getting it makes you more angry, angrier than when you found out Abby went missing. “But, I did this for you? Why can’t you see that? Why can’t you see I do everything for you?”

“I didn’t ask you to take my best friend away from me! I’m asking you to give her back to me!”

“She’s not here! Why would she be here?!”

“Do not let her move,” You told them as you slowly took a couple of steps away from her. “If either of you let her walk out that damn door, m’shooting you both.” With the stare you were giving them, they both knew you weren’t kidding. You were scary when you were angry, that’s not a secret.

Wandering into the living room, the same one you ate fucking dinner in, you halted in your steps with your arms folded over your chest. You weren’t sure what you were looking for, but as you glanced around the room, you couldn’t exactly find anything out of the ordinary, or even remotely suspicious. Maybe you had gotten it wrong? You were so sleep deprived that anyone could have written the note, Mandy can’t be the only one to write hearts next to her name, right?

You were about to give up on this crazy plan; the crazy plan of yelling and screaming at Mandy until she told you what you wanted to hear, when the faintest scraping sound had caught your attention. It wasn’t loud, but it was loud enough that you could hear it from where you were standing. Your eyebrows furrow and your body turns just slightly, head pointing in the direction of the cabinet opposite the bookshelf. “What’s that noise?” You asked to no one in particular.

“What noise?” Ellie quipped, cautiously keeping her eyes on Mandy, who was still slumped against the counter, and occasionally over to you where you stood. “I don’t hear anything—”

There it was again, the slight scraping sound, but only this time it’s a little louder.

Before you could take another step towards the cabinet, Mandy was suddenly moving around and pushing herself in front of you, but you weren’t focused on her face, no, you were more focused on the gun pointed at your fuckin’ face. “I can’t let you go through there,” She chuckled and rolled her eyes. “If you just stopped looking, stopped asking people, begging people for help, then this wouldn’t be happening. I did this for us, for you, why can’t you see that?”

“You took her from me, from us, why would I love you for that?” You scoffed, stepped a little closer. “If you’re gonna shoot me because I want to find her, then don’t be a goddamn pussy and shoot me.”

“S…Shoot you?” Mandy stammered, quickly shaking her head. “No! No, I don’t want to shoot you, I love you!”

“Y/N,” Ellie warned, trying to figure out a way to help you, get you away from her. “Y/N.”

“Let me have her, that’s all I want, please just— I need Abby, please” You begged, eyes fluttering closed as you felt the cool metal on your skin. “I just want my Abby back.”

“There’s no Abby left to bring back.”

“I really hate when people lie to me,” You whispered so quietly that she almost didn’t catch it. “Liars are one of the worst things in the world, stop trying to piss me off even more.”

You’re not sure what happens, one second you’re all standing there, and the next Ellie’s jumping at her, putting herself on the line to simply help you. “Ellie!” You growled, watching her practically pushing Mandy onto the floor, the gun still safely in her hands.

“Now is really not the time to question what m’doing. Go get her!”

Quickly, you manage to rush around the commotion, and slip back into the kitchen; keys, surely she keeps keys around here somewhere right? The kitchen is cold, plates in the sink that haven’t been touched in weeks, and your mind starts to wonder again as you look around. Could Abby really be here? Locked away without any sunlight? What if she was here but it’s too late?

Pulling open one of the drawers, you let out a sigh of relief once you spot a set of keys, way too many now that you look at it. Who needs that many if they don’t have secrets they’d rather stay locked away? Snatching them up and slamming the drawer shut again, you stumble your way out of the kitchen.

Jesse’s already pushing the cabinet away, a metal door hiding and tucked away perfectly behind it, when you also happen to glance over to see Ellie was standing over Mandy as you walked back into the living room, the gun now in her hands. “Go, I can look after Ellie, make sure nothing happens.” He groaned, slumping against the wooden cabinet.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, go!”

With trembling hands, one by one, you slot the keys into the lock; cursing and muttering under your breath when certain ones don’t unlock it. By the 7th key, the lock falls and you suck in a deep breath. Anything could be waiting for you on the other side of that door. Your life is already on the line, what’s one more to the list? So with a final sigh, and groan, you pull down the handle and pull the door open. The loud screeching of metal rings through your ears and sends a shiver down your spine.

The coldness washes over you quickly as you look down at the steps leaning into the basement once the doors open. You glance over at Ellie, Mandy’s still kicking at her legs, trying to get up and you send your friend a reassuring smile before making your way down into the dark and eerie room.

There’s no windows, you notice that quite quickly first, they’re all boarded up. No one would hear you if this entire plan goes to shit, Mandy somehow locking you up in here. Not a single living soul outside of this house would be able to hear your screams and cries for help. Not even the animals or insects living right beside it.

Tucking the keys in your back pocket, you step off the last step and release yet another sigh. It’s colder down here than it was opening the door, you think to yourself. To your left there’s a table with an endless supply of books, weird. Moving towards them with caution, you’re quick to pick up on all the torn up papers, the pens scattered along it. Picking up one of the notes, you’re in no luck when you find there’s nothing on there, yet another mystery in your endless supply of wonder.

To your right there’s another small room. You look at it for longer than you like, wondering who would need two rooms in one, until the gentle scraping catches your attention again as you went to turn around. It sounded like chalk on a chalk board, that’s the best way you could describe such a sound, maybe it wasn’t exactly lose to what you can imagine, but it’s the best you got.

As you got closer, you noticed the smaller padlock on the door, keeping whatever’s hidden, hidden.

Pulling the keys out of your pocket, you’re shaking even more when you look through them to find a key much smaller than the other ones, one that’s dainty and could hide anywhere if it tried harder enough.

The lock drops and you start to notice your hands haven’t stopped shaking, but now it’s starting to get uncomfortable, and uncontrollable for you to deal with. Sliding the lock, you press your forehead against the door and take a deep breath. Was this how it ends? Was this going to lead you into yet another deadend? Was Abby really gone and you were going to be stuck down here with some crazy psycho?

“Let go of me!” You heard Mandy scream from above you. Ellie’s words being screamed angrily right back at her.

With a final sigh, you pull the handle down and pull the door open.

If Abby’s not here, and this is just me falling into a trap, let everyone know I tried.

It’s dark. You can’t see anything. Turning your head, you notice a small light switch just beside the door, covered in mould and dirt, probably not the best idea to put your hands all in it, but you do it. You flick the switch and the light loominates the room and that’s when you notice it. You finally see it.

The figure curled up in the corner of the room, holding themselves until whatever nightmare they’re able to get out of. Taking a singular step into the room, you crouch slowly, ignoring the throbbing pain in your hand as you reach it out and gently touch their shoulder. “M’not gonna hurt you,” You reassured just before they flinch at your touch with a pained whimper head whipping around and tired blue eyes meet yours.

The sight causes your breath to hitch and heart to thump loudly in your chest.

“Abby?”

Jerry, who was smiling and cooking something for dinner as the music on the radio played quietly, almost fell to his knees the second the door opened to reveal you, Ellie, Jesse and Abby.

“My girl?” He whispered, not wanting to be loud to the point it might scare her. “Abby,” He breathed out when blue eyes met him. “Oh, baby.”

Guiding her towards the table carefully, you gently helped her sit down, but not before her hand tightens around your arm when you went to walk away. “M’just gonna run you a bath, you’re cold and you need to be warm, I’ll be right back, okay?”

Abby simply nodded slowly. Almost like she wasn’t even there.

“Honey, I can make you something else to eat? You don’t have to eat this but,” Jerry trailed off, watching the way Abby’s simply still looking in the spot you once were, yearning for you to come back already. “At least drink something for me?” He frowned, pulling his hand back quickly at the sight of Abby flinching and pulling her hand away when his goes to touch hers. “I won’t hurt you, baby girl. I’d never hurt you.”

You come back no later than 15 minutes. To her that’s still too long.

Abby didn’t move an inch or speak once the entire time you left to run her a bath. She was still sitting silently on the chair, not touching the food her Dad had plated for her, and left the glass of water in Its original spot. “Abby?”

Her head turned slightly, the most movement she’s done since she got home, and looked right at you. Her eyes looked dull, emotionless but stood up slowly when you held your hand out for her. Taking your hand, Abby doesn’t look back or spare a glance to anyone in the room as she leaves. It’s quiet, too quiet but no on can blame her, she’s been in a room for god knows how long, they understand that this is going to take some time to adjust.

By the time you made it into her bedroom, you’re quick to scoop up the fresh clothes in your free hand, the other still holding onto hers tightly as you guide her into the bathroom. The same bathroom that there’s a warm bath ready for her.

Placing the clean folded clothes on the toilet, you looked over at Abby, who still has yet to talk, was facing away from you, looking at the water. “There’s clean clothes here, if you need anything else, don’t hesitate to ask, okay?” You smiled. “I’ll give you some privacy, I’ll just be in your room— Abby?” Her hand reaches out for yours, grabbing you tightly and keeping you there when you turn around to leave. “Hey,”

“S..Stay,” Her voice cracked, but kept her grip firm. “S..Stay, please?”

“Okay, of course, m’not going anywhere,” You promised and cautiously stepped closer to her. “Let’s take this off, yeah? You’re probably not warm enough.” As you went to unzip the hoodie she was wearing, her hand stopped you again. “Sorry, habit,”

“It’s n..not the same,” A sob slipped out and she shook her head. “Not the same,”

“What’s not the same?”

“If I take it off, you’re g..going to find it disgusting,”

“I could never think that of you, Abs”

After a few minutes, Abby nodded reluctantly and let you unzip the jacket fully. It only took a few seconds for you to stop in your tracks and understand what she meant once the jacket was off and she was once again facing away from you. “Abby,” You gasped.

You remember the times you would spend laying on her bed, with her snuggled in your chest, and threading your fingers through her hair, braiding it, playing with you. It was all gone in an instant. Gone just like she had once been. This Abby was left fragile, so thin, pale and terrified. “I..I’m disgusting,”

Walking around her until you were face to face, you held back a frown and gently cupped her face between your hands, your heart shattering into pieces at her flinch. “Won’t hurt you,” You whispered, wiped away the tears that fell and kissed her cheek. “You’re here with me, you’re safe, and I’ll never hurt you,” Slowly, you brushed your finger across her cheek, and smiled when she carefully leaned into your touch. “You’re beautiful, you’ve always been beautiful.”

Abby doesn’t believe you, you can tell by the way she shakes her head, cries harder and holds onto your arms tightly. “M’scared, m’so scared.”

“I know, Love, I know, but I won’t let anyone hurt you again, I promise, I promise I won’t.”

By the time Abby managed to get into the bath, with the help from you, she cried at every touch, rubbing her eyes harshly each time you rubbed the shampoo into her hair, mumbled about being sorry that she couldn’t stop squirming and with every reassurance from you that it was okay, it made her chest heave and cries louder. You didn’t ask her what happened, you know that when she was ready to talk about it, you would be there to listen. Guide and help her when needed.

Rinsing the final suds of shampoo from her hair, or what Mandy left of it, you smiled softly when her eyes fluttered open and found you. “Hi,” You pressed your forehead against hers and brushed your thumb over the side of her neck slowly. “You’re getting warmer.” You murmured. “We’re almost done.”

“Promise?”

“I promise, Love.”

Abby was clad in some of your old clothes, curled up in your side on her bed 15 minutes later. Her hand gripped the back of your jumper tightly, face buried deeply in your chest as you drew random patterns along her skin beneath your clothes. “M’glad you’re here,” You whispered against her forehead. “I never stopped looking for you, I hope you know that. You can tell me what happened when you’re ready, m’never gonna rush you to talk about it, but know that we’re here for you, and we just want to keep you safe. We’re ready to talk when you’re ready.”

All Abby could do was nod.

The door squeaked and opened to reveal Ellie, clothes dirty and hair slightly ruffled, as she stepped into the room with a fresh plate of food in one hand, and a drink in the other. “Hey, Abs.” She smiled, placing both on the nightstand before sliding onto the bed beside her. “I know you might not be hungry but, I brought you some food, Jerry practically rushed me to bring it to you.”

Abby curled more into you and buried her face in your chest with a smile tugging at her lips. “How is she?”

“What did you do?” You asked, ignoring her question and noticing the red stains on her shirt instead.

“I took care of it, she won’t hurt Abby or anyone else again.” Ellies eyes didn’t leave Abby as she spoke. “Stop, I took care of it, like we promised. We keep each other safe.” She sighed once she noticed your look. “Abby?”

“Mhm?”

“Can I cuddle you?”

Turning her head slowly, Abby looks up at Ellie for a couple of seconds before nodding. Lying down on the bed further, the Brunette carefully places her arm over Abby’s waist and cuddles up to her back, while Abby places her head against your chest again. “M’sorry it took so long,” She mumbled into Abby’s back. “M’so sorry.” She kissed her head and held her tighter.

Leaning your head down, you pressed your lips against Abby’s forehead, stroked her arm comfortingly and smiled when she held onto you a little tighter. “You can sleep now, we’ll always keep you safe, Baby.”

One secret revealed, another buried and hidden.

437 notes · View notes

starsinthesky5 · 2 months ago

Text

nothings gonna hurt you baby II part 2 || joe burrow x reader

description: loving what you do doesn’t always mean it loves you back—it takes more than it gives sometimes

a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS!! oh my goodness i am so sorry this took so SO long to get out! i really hope this was worth the (painful) wait!. this is flashback heavy with smutty smut smut, angst, and adorable fluffy fluffiness 😍 as a reminder, this is after the week two loss against KC. (yeah, i know this took me like 3 months)

warnings: angst, language, SMUT. MDNI.

songs listened to while writing: sailor song : gigi perez, nothings gonna hurt you baby : cigarettes after sex, you’re the only good thing in my life : cigarettes after sex, sweet nothing : taylor swift, slow hands : niall horan, nasty : ariana grande, look after you : the fray, die for you - the weeknd, call it what you want : taylor swift, teenage dream : katy perry

word count: 48 k (sorry. i know. im sorry)

NGHYB masterlist || part 1 → (read FIRST as this is a continuation of it)

taglist: (ask to be added): @joeyfranchise @joeys-babe @joeyb1989 @softburrow @burrowbarbie @yelenasbraid @lovelyburrow @majestic87

and a special thanks to @sofferaddict for a bunch of these ideas :)

---------------------------------------------

“Hmph,” you mumbled as you jolted awake, a small gust of cold air slipping through the room, sending a chill down your spine. Your eyes quickly fluttered open at the sudden sensation, but the darkness that enveloped the room was thick, making it difficult for you to make anything out in the unlit room.

You shifted slightly to shake off the grogginess, but all you could see was the glow of the alarm clock on the nightstand. You squinted at the time–3:21 a.m.–which made your stomach churn. You never woke up like this in the middle of the night; you were always a heavy sleeper. Nothing could wake you once you passed out cold–not glass shattering, not a fire, not a hurricane, and certainly not a cool breeze. It had been a mildly concerning yet adorable habit you had since college, a habit Joe discovered when one night, the fire alarms went off in his apartment building and you couldn’t be more unbothered while his building was at risk of burning down.

Flashback to LSU

Beep-Beep. Beep-Beep. Beep-Beep.

“What the fuck?” Joe mumbled, flipping around in the shower as he wiped the water droplets off his face before slicking his hair back, his brows furrowing at the sudden & strange noise he heard.

Beep-Beep.

“The hell is that noise?” he said again while looking around the shower walls as if the noise was coming from inside of them, “Wait, do I have an alarm set?” he asked himself, then peeked out from the shower curtain to see if his phone was the source of the annoying beeping noise–which it wasn’t.

BEEP-BEEP. BEEP. BEEP.

“Why the fuck is it getting louder?” Joe grumbled as he let go of the curtain and turned the water off before stepping out of the shower in a hurry. He reached for his towel, carelessly wrapping it around his waist while the water dripped from his golden hair and trailed down his muscular back as he moved around in the bathroom to try to find the source of the sound that had disrupted his much-needed post-game shower.

“Can I not shower in peace?” he complained as he looked aimlessly for the source of the sound in the vanity drawers, medicine cabinet, and even the air vent. “It’s not coming from in here…,” he said a few seconds later before his eyes met the door, then his brain wandered to what...or who was outside of the door. “Hm, she better not have burnt something in the kitchen,” he laughed to himself, imagining you in his kitchen, half naked & half asleep, accidentally setting off the smoke detector while trying to make a late-night snack. But before he could let his imagination wander off too much, the beeping grew louder and he was snapped back to the present.

He swung the bathroom door open, fully prepared to get a whiff of burnt food at full force. But instead of a smell, the noise hit him with full force, and it was blaring through his entire apartment. “Shit,” he mumbled under his breath as his eyes trailed up to the flashing red light coming from his ceiling, his heart dropping once he realized what was actually happening.

There was a fire in his building.

There was no burnt food in the kitchen.

There was a fire.

That was the fire alarm’s sound.

His eyes then fell to his bed where you were curled up against his pillows, completely unbothered by the piercing alarm above you. A soft smile tugged at the corners of your lips, almost as if you were caught in a dream that was so intense and lively that your body’s alert system was asleep too.

“Unreal,” he muttered, shaking his head out of amusement. It wasn’t as if the alarm sound was coming from down the hall, it was right above you–yet you still managed to stay asleep. “She’s actually sleeping through this?” he chuckled while walking over to your side of his bed. He placed a hand on your arm, gently shaking you while using his other hand to move your hair out of your face, “Y/N? Baby?” he whispered softly.

“…Mmm,” you hummed in your sleep as you dug your head into his pillow even further, still so caught in the dream you were having to realize Joe was crouched down beside you and his hand was on your arm.

“Lovey? Wake up?” he whispered again, his voice soft and tender, this time using the nickname that he knew made you melt into a pile of goo which usually resulted in a lazy smile or adorable eye bat–but this time didn’t. The only response Joe got was the calm rise and fall of your chest as you stayed in your deep slumber–and the realization of how deeply you were sleeping made his heart squeeze. He really didn’t want to wake you up; you were sound asleep, in his bed, in the comfort of his space, and he didn’t want to pull you from your dream-filled oasis like this.

Joe let out a sigh before shaking his head, “I don’t want to scare her by waking her up too roughly. But how do I get her up? We need to get out before the building burns down, that’s if there even is a legit fire,” he thought to himself, glancing from your precious face to the flashing alarm above you. It could be a false alarm, but it could also be the real deal. He wasn’t going to risk it, especially because of you, so you both really needed to get going. Shaking you wasn’t doing anything, and saying your name clearly wasn’t cutting through the haze that had you wrapped up in your dreams. So what could he do?

After spending a few seconds thinking of ways to wake you without startling you, a gentle voice entered his head—primarily because he remembered the movie you made him watch last night back at your place. It was one of your all-time favorites, a classic fairytale with an enchanted sleep and a true love’s kiss breaking the spell. He teased you over and over for your choice, but you urged him to watch it with you, claiming it was the perfect comfort movie to watch with your one true love.

“And from this slumber you shall wake, when true love's kiss, the spell shall break,” the voice in his head recited which happened to be your voice.

“I am her one true love,” he shrugged as he thought over the silly line from the fairytale you were so cutely obsessed with. “Alright, let’s see if this fairytale logic actually works,” he then smiled as he looked at you for a few more seconds, your captivating beauty making the sound of the alarm fade into the background; you really were a real-life Sleeping Beauty. You were his Sleeping Beauty. He couldn’t help but chuckle softly to himself, realizing that life had its own unique way of imitating art in the strangest moments.

He leaned down and pressed his soft lips against yours, feeling the warmth of your breath against him as he felt himself getting lost in your touch.

Kissing you was something he could never get tired of. Joe wouldn’t hesitate to spend the entire day curled up in bed with you, cradling your face and dropping gentle, sometimes passionate, kisses on your lips if he was given the chance. He was like a needy baby whenever it came to kissing you–he always needed that bit of closeness and he just couldn’t get enough no matter how much you gave. Whenever this closeness was taken from him, he’d give you the same tempting pout and those puppy-dog eyes that made your heart melt. It was his way of saying that he needed you, that even the smallest distance between you two was too far for his liking. He was never like this with any of his previous girlfriends, there was just something so comforting and fulfilling about you, something that made him feel at home. And he wanted to feel at home all the damn time if he had the opportunity to.

After holding the kiss for a few seconds, he gently pulled away with a smile and was met with the sight of your lashes fluttering—meaning it worked. “A true love’s kiss,” he smirked, brushing his thumb against your soft cheek, “I guess it does work every time,”.

You moved around in his silk sheets for a few seconds, trying to chase the last bit of your dream before your eyes eventually fluttered open. The piercing sound of the alarm filled your ears and the sight of Joe crouched over you made your heart skip a beat. “Wha- What,” you whispered, your voice groggy and your brain still clouded from sleep. “Joey?” your eyebrows wrinkled in confusion as you tried to understand what was happening.

“Hey, baby,” he whispered gently, trying not to startle you.

“What’s going on?” you whined, trying to rub the sleep away from your eyes as your head began pounding due to the alarm’s relentless beeping.

He spoke softly, trying to keep you calm, “Hey, it’s okay, just wake up for me, alright? There’s a fire alarm going off and we need to get outta here,” he explained.

Your once-sleepy eyes flashed with urgency at the mention of the word fire. “Fire? There’s a fire?” you shrieked in panic as you instantly sat up in the bed. The adrenaline hit you like a wave, washing away any lasting remnants of your sleep.

“I don’t know for sure, but we need to get outside in case there is,” he said while he stepped back to give you room to stand up.

“O- Okay,” you nodded as you quickly slipped out from the covers and scrambled to slip your shoes on and fix your hair.

After you got yourself together, he grabbed your hand and started leading you through his apartment, heading toward the door, but as he reached for the handle, you pulled him back. “Wait!” you shrieked, your grip tightening around his hand.

“What?” he responded after flipping his head back to look at you. “What’s wrong?”.

You gave him a quick look up and down, waiting to see if he would notice himself, but Joe always had a habit of being adorably clueless even in the most urgent moments. “You’re still in a towel, Joey,” you giggled, watching as his eyes widened and dropped down to his lower half, realizing he was indeed still in his towel.

“Oh,” he blinked before looking back up at you like a deer caught in headlights, the thought of stepping out in front of everyone basically naked was mortifying for him, and the mental image of that made him want to die. “I just…Let me just-...,” he nervously stammered.

“Yeah,” you nodded with a soft giggle before giving him a playful shove back to his room. “No girl needs to see my man naked–even if it’s partially–except for me,” you yelled, earning a playful smirk from him before he disappeared into his room.

A few seconds later, he returned wearing his familiar purple LSU football shorts and a plain black shirt. “I wonder if everyone thinks we’re dead? We’re taking our sweet time which is completely defeating the purpose of that annoying ass alarm,” you chuckled as you turned around and reached for the door handle. But before you could open the door, you felt Joe grab your other hand and yank you back from the door.

“Wait!” he shrieked, almost as loud as you did a few moments ago.

“What?” you said, looking back at him with a concerned expression.

Joe lowered his head, sending you a look as he raised his eyebrows, “You forgetting something?” he asked you, giving you a once over just like you did to him.

Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion, “No? I don’t think so?”.

You watched as his eyes fell to your lower half, your eyes following his gaze and your confusion still evident. “I’m not letting you out there with no pants on,” he huffed, folding his arms over his chest with a determined look on his face.

Once you realized what he was talking about, you shook your head and rolled your eyes at his silliness, “Joe, your shirt is like a dress on me and I have panties on,”.

“Y/N…Nobody, and I mean nobody, needs to get a peek at what’s under your shirt other than me,” he shook his head, his tone and posture similar to one of a protective dad.

“It’s not even windy,” you shot back. “I’m not gonna have a Marylin moment, trust me,”.

He shook his head and placed his hands on your shoulders, flipping you around and playfully pushing you back towards his room as you did to him, “Put some sweats on, or no more me helping you shave your legs in the shower,” he whispered in your ear, his voice playful and full of teasing.

Your eyes widened, “You wouldn’t dare,” you gasped.

“Oh, but I would,” he responded with a dangerous smirk, making the alarms go off in your head. Whenever Joe said he would do something, he always did it and this should be no different.

Joe was the absolute perfect boyfriend, and nobody could ever come close to the standard he set for you. No ordinary guy would offer to help his girlfriend shave her legs, but the first time you and Joe showered together, he did. It was a simple gesture, but it meant the world to you, especially because you always wanted to look perfect for him even though you knew he could care less about a few hairs on your leg. He knew how annoying it was for a girl to shave her legs–getting every spot without accidentally nicking herself–so he took it upon himself to help you out when he could. He was so gentle with you, so undeniably caring and sweet, always handling you like you were something as valuable as the koh-i-noor diamond. It’s the way he reached out to you with little acts of love that spoke louder than words. His words were already so powerful but his actions sealed the deal every time. You often wondered what you did to deserve him, someone who cared enough to make the smallest struggles feel a little lighter.

“Okay, Okay,” you said while throwing your hands in the air and hurrying into his room to grab your sweatpants before he acted on his silly threat. “I am never going back to shaving my legs alone, mm mm,” you shook your head as you stumbled around to slip your sweats on, leaving Joe laughing in the hallway. Even though you were just talking about never going back to shaving your legs alone, that line had a deeper meaning in your heart.

You didn’t want to go back to shaving alone, but you really just didn’t want to go back to anything in your life that was ‘Pre-Joe’.

You thought your life before you met him was as good as it would get, but you couldn’t have been more wrong. You thought you were genuinely happy before you met him–comfortable with your post-breakup life, satisfied with your typical, redundant daily routine, pleased with how simple your life was. But when you met Joe, you saw that although simplicity and predictability were safe, the thrill was exciting. The thrill was worth living for.

Joe was the thrill you didn’t know you needed.

The way he loved you–both physically and emotionally–was unlike anything you’d experienced before. When you first felt the effects of his love for you, you were shocked. He did things that you didn’t think were typical in a relationship. He took the time to learn what made you feel cared for, what made you laugh, and what made you feel adored in ways you never thought to ask for. He was attentive to the smallest details–things you never thought anyone would notice. He knew exactly how you liked to have your coffee with that specific splash of oat milk–-early on in your relationship during the ‘talking stage’ he would show up at your doorstep with your coffee from your favorite breakfast cafe so he could save you the trip and walk you to class. He’d also notice the way your nose scrunched when you tried to hide a laugh, the way you’d fidget with your birthstone ring when you got anxious, and the way you always needed a few extra moments of quiet, cuddling time with him before he had to leave you to go to practice (but to be honest, that was mostly for Joe. If you were clingy, he was clingier).

He took all the time in the world to understand not just your habits and tendencies, but also your beautiful heart. He learned what made you feel cared for–like how you preferred to be held tightly during a storm because you secretly were scared of thunder, or how you always liked to have a hand to squeeze during scary parts of a slasher movie you begged him to watch with you. He even memorized your laugh, knowing exactly what to do to bring it out–whether it was through his silly dance moves or sarcastic and sometimes suggestive comments he’d make during your late-night conversations.

He treated this like it was something bigger than just a college relationship, he didn’t treat you like you were just his girlfriend, he treated you like you were his partner, his other half, his favorite person ever. He made you feel so secure, leaving absolutely no room for doubt in the relationship. You were the first person he wanted to tell about his day, the first one he thought of when something exciting happened for him, and the first person he’d go to when he just needed comfort after a rough game. He made you feel like you were worth every ounce of effort he put into your relationship, and that was a feeling you hadn’t known before.

He’d spend the night with you even after a gruesome and exhausting practice or game, just because he wanted to spend time with you and it didn’t matter if he was tired or feeling upset. He’d leave you little notes around your apartment, each one filled with words that made your heart flutter (some of them even a little silly and corny because well, that was just Joe). It was those quiet moments between you as well–when he’d run his fingers through your hair when you felt stressed, or the way he would absentmindedly pull you closer at night in his sleep because he needed to feel you. He made you feel like you were an essential part of his life, and not just a chapter in it. He made you believe that love wasn’t just about being content; it was about finding someone who made the ordinary feel extraordinary.

He showed you that love wasn’t about grand gestures, it was about consistency. It was about those little, everyday actions that showed he was always thinking of you. And this was a feeling you hadn’t felt before with any other guy. A love that didn’t waver with time, but deepend. After getting a taste of what he had to offer, you just couldn’t go back to what life was like before you met him. He brought out a side of you that you didn’t even know existed. A version of yourself that laughed a little louder and lived a little bolder. And even though you had only been together for a short period, the way you felt about him was so intense. It felt like the connection you had with him was deeper than the usual of a new relationship, almost as if your souls already met in another lifetime and you were just catching up on lost time in this life.

—

After finally getting yourself together, you ran back out to Joe, who gave you an energetic nod of approval. “Better?” you teased, rolling your eyes with a tiny smile.

“Much, Much better,” he grinned, making you chuckle before he reached for the door and finally swung it open.

He stayed close behind you, one hand resting on your back as he led you through the hallway and to the fire escape stairs. “Thank god you’re not super high up. My slow ass would be long gone if I had to go down more than 3 flights of stairs,” you joked as he opened the door to the stairs.

Joe laughed softly as the two of you moved down the stairs, the echoes of your footsteps mixing with the distant alarm. “Mmm, I don’t think so. I’d be your knight in shining armor, just casually scooping you up and getting you out of danger without breaking a sweat,”.

You shot him a playful glance, “Yeah, I’d probably sleep through half of it too if you carried me. Wake up when it’s all over and ask what happened,”.

He grinned, giving your back a gentle pat as you reached the final set of stairs, “Honestly, I wouldn’t mind. You’re cuter than normal when you’re all sleepy like this,” he said, his voice warmer as he stole another glance at you, your drowsiness clear even in this chaotic moment.

You nudged him with your shoulder, “You just like having an excuse to show off those muscles,” you teased, but deep down, you knew how much you appreciated his instinct to protect you, even when things were shaky.

“Maaaybe,” he said while scratching the back of his neck, “But I think I love you point one percent more,” he teased, quickening his pace to reach the ground floor and swinging the door open just in time to avoid your playful swat at him.

“Joseph Lee!” you yelled, your voice a mix of playful annoyance and amusement as you swatted at his back, both of you stumbling out of the fire escape and into the lobby of his apartment building.

He let out a laugh before placing his arm around your shoulder and leaning down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering against your skin for a moment, “Kidding. I love you 100% more than anything in the world, including my muscles,” he smiled.

“Good. I don’t like sharing you or your love,” you nodded, pressing a warm kiss to his neck as you felt his grip around you tighten.

“You won’t have to, lovey. I’m all yours,” he said in a way that made your heart melt. It felt like you two were just in your own bubble, shielded from all the chaos around you as you relished the comfort and warmth that radiated off each of you.

But that bubble quickly popped when a loud, familiar voice called out from across the lobby. “There y'all are!” Ja’marr yelled from the entrance of the apartment building, a smirk on his face as he took note of how wrapped up you two were in each other’s arms. “I thought you guys died or some shit,” he folded his arms and shook his head like a concerned older brother, clearly relieved but ready to tease the two of you.

Joe waved him off, rolling his eyes with a grin, “Nah, man, just taking our time. We had to have a dramatic exit, you know? Keep everyone on edge,” he said on the way to where Ja’marr was standing.

You couldn’t help but laugh as you leaned into Joe a little more, “Sorry for the scare. We just had a…uh, slight wardrobe malfunction,” you joked.

“Mmm,” Joe said while tilting his head, “It was a little more than a wardrobe malfunction, babe,” his playful tone made you roll your eyes again.

Ja’marr shook his head while mumbling something to himself before speaking up, “Wardrobe malfunction? Oh, you guys weren’t like…you know…,” he trailed off, raising an eyebrow to drive his point home.

You and Joe stared at him in mutual confusion as you tried to make sense of what he was insinuating. Even though you were still a little sleepy, it clicked in your head a few seconds later, “Oh, no. God, no,” you chuckled, your body shaking with the force of your laughter.

Joe looked between you and Ja’marr, clearly confused, “I’m lost,” he said, his eyebrows wrinkling as he watched the two of you giggle.

“He thought we were too busy, you know…busy doing a little something-something to notice the alarm,” you smirked, nudging his side with your elbow.

“...Oh,” Joe said while raising his eyebrows in realization. He leaned in closer to you as a grin rose on his face, “I mean. That probably would’ve happened after my shower. The alarm ruined our plans,” he sheepishly grinned.

“Okayyyyy,” Ja’marr groaned, throwing his hands in the air dramatically. “You two need to stop spending the night at each other’s places every day. Y'all too young to have children,”.

“Hey, we do a lot more than just…uh…stay in bed all the time,” Joe laughed.

“Do we though?” you interrupted with a pat to his muscular chest.

“You’re not helping,” Joe whispered in your ear with a smile before going back to his conversation with Ja’marr. “Anyyyway, Ms. Sleeping Beauty over here is mostly the reason why we took so long. She was legit sleeping through the entire thing and my fire alarm is right above my bed if that puts this into perspective,”.

Ja’marr shook his head, his expression showing his disbelief and amusement all at once, “Man, I don’t know how y’all do it. Most people would be out the door in a heartbeat but you two over here in ya own little world,”

Joe just shrugged, giving you a quick and proud glance, “Guess we just roll that way, bro,”.

“Now y'all are lucky this was just a drill. Real fire and y'all was boutta be cooookeddd,” he ridiculed playfully before giving you two a wave as he walked backward to where the rest of the apartment tenets were gathered.

“This was a drill,” you choked as you and Joe followed Ja’marr out to the parking lot where everyone was, your eyes moving up to Joe who was just as surprised as you. “What the fuck. I should’ve just stayed asleep,” you complained, remembering how comfortable and cozy you were just a few minutes ago.

“I still don’t know how you were sleeping through that,” he smiled. “I’ve never seen someone so lost in their sleep that their alert system is completely off,”.

“Welcome to my world,” you grinned. “That’s how I roll. I can sleep through just about anything and that annoying ass fire alarm being one of them. Quite literally nothing can wake me up in the middle of the night,”.

“Remind me to set up an extra secure security system in the house we’ll eventually buy together in a couple years. If someone broke in, we’re goners,” he shook his head, the mention of living in a house…together…making your heart skip a beat.

You paused for a few seconds to take in what he said and once you did, a warm feeling spread throughout your chest, “I got you,” you smiled, looking up at him with nothing but pure adoration in your eyes. He never failed to bring up his future with you whenever he could, and it was getting increasingly common as you two spent more and more time with one another. It was the way he’d mention all the little trips he wanted to go on with you with that adorable glimmer in his baby-blue eyes–that camping weekend already being planned out in his head ever since you old him you’d never been, or how he’d talk about how excited he was to have you on the sidelines for every NFL game he’d (hopefully) play in. Those little glimpses into his thoughts meant everything to you because they were a reminder that he saw a lifetime when he looked at you.

“Do you ever think about what our house will look like?” he asked, a playful twinkle in his eyes. “I can just picture us decorating for Christmas and fighting over if the tree should be silver or green,”.

“Um, it’ll be green…classic is better. Duh,” you couldn’t help but giggle, the warmth that bubbled inside your body because of him spreading even more. Your voice became softer as a shy smile crept onto your face, “But to answer your question…all the time. I think about it all the time,” you said, glancing away as you felt your cheeks heat up. Although the way he was looking at you right now made it impossible for you to stay away. You met his eyes again, this time seeing how soft, how delicate they were after you said, “I think about you, about our future, every morning when I open my eyes. And I think about you, about what our life could be like, every night when I turn out the lights,”.

Joe paused for a second as his face became more serious with realization. Have you really thought about it? He thought about it all the time–what your life would be like together after all of this–but he never knew if you thought about it like he did. He oftentimes mentioned your future in your conversations and he usually was the one to bring it up, and you two hadn’t talked about it with full seriousness yet, even though in your hearts you both knew where you wanted this to go. He didn’t really know how you felt about it and that made him a little nervous, so you saying that was the best reassurance he could’ve gotten. “I love you. I love you like a lot a lot,” he smiled before leaning down to capture your lips in a sweet kiss, one that conveyed some of those special feelings he couldn’t put into words.

You stuffed one of your hands into his dirty blonde curls, lightly scratching his scalp as you melted into his lips. A content sigh left him at your gentle touch, his shoulders relaxing as he leaned into you. “Mmm,” he hummed once he felt you suck on his top lip, but just before things could get too heated, the bubble around you two popped once again.

“Get a room!” Ja’marr yelled from a few away, “Y’all can’t even last 20 minutes without sucking face, damn!” he laughed.

You and Joe froze in the middle of your kiss for a few seconds, both your cheeks turning an even deeper shade of red than before. You pulled away, immediately hiding your face in Joe’s neck out of embarrassment. His hand instantly shifted to cradle the back of your head as his other snaked around your waist, his protective mannerisms like second nature.

“You’re just jealous,” Joe shot back with a smirk, sticking his tongue out in a way that made him look more like a mischievous kid than a star quarterback. He enjoyed teasing him, knowing how much it would get under Ja’marr’s skin. “Don’t worry buddy, maybe one day you’ll find someone who can actually put up with you,” he jabbed as he felt you laugh against his skin.

Ja’marr rolled his eyes, crossing his arms as he spoke up, “Yeah, well I’m pretty sure there’s a long line of girls waiting to sweep me off my feet..so be careful there, Burrow,” he said sarcastically, but with a hint of confidence.

“Please, spare me with the bullshit Ja’marr. The only thing you’re sweeping off your feet is the dust on your fancy shoes since you never have an occasion to take them out. If there was a line, it would probably be full of girls trying to figure out how to escape after one dinner with you,” Joe teased.

“Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night,” Ja’marr said while waving Joe off. “Just wait till I find my perfect match. Then you’ll see who’s really got game ‘round here,”.

Joe rolled his eyes, “I don’t need game, bud. I already found my perfect match and I know I’m set for life,” he said before pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, making you smile and nuzzle your nose against his fragrant, freshly washed neck. Their playful banter always warmed your heart. It was always so natural between them, the kind of banter only the closest of friends could have.

“Y'all make me sick. God damn he’s whipped for you, Y/N,” Ja’marr scoffed, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips as he shook his head. Even though the sight of you two cuddled up and all over each other made him physically ill, he couldn’t help but be over the moon for his best friend. Seeing him so in love to the point where everything around him faded away was all he could have wanted for his best friend, and the fact that he fell in love with an amazing girl like you was even better. Joe deserved this, to be loved the way you love him, to be happy in the way you make him happy, to be seen in the way you see him. Ever since you came into Joe’s life, Ja'marr felt as if some of the heavy burdens that were weighing on Joe's shoulders had been lifted. It's like you came in, effortlessly took off some of his load, and lightened his spirits. He seems to be carrying less weight, moving more freely, and radiating more energy ever since you came into the picture.

“Anywayyy,” Joe said while turning his attention back to you, “I’ve been meaning to ask, what were you dreaming about earlier? I wanna know what made you so…like gone,” he chuckled after he pulled away, his hands still seated firmly on each side of your hip.

“Hm, I think I was dreaming about our first date,” you laughed, trying to recollect the specifics of your dream.

He raised an eyebrow, “Really? What about it?” he asked.

“Oh, just feeling that amazing night over again. Specifically, the way you were so adorably nervous around me,” you blushed. “The way you were fidgeting with the napkin like that was going to save you from impending doom or something, or how you nervously locked in on the menu as if you were reading some sports magazine article about yourself. But I saw you sneaking looks at me,” you said as you leaned into him a little more. “Not so sneaky as you think you are,”.

“I was trynna play it cool,” he shrugged as a smile spread across his face. “That was my first real date in a long time and I just wanted to impress you and not scare you off,”.

“Oh, you were sooooo cool,” you mocked, “The coolest man to ever be cool. Might have to start calling you Joe Cool now like they did Joe Montana,”.

“Okay, Okay,” Joe rolled his eyes and chuckled. “I don’t think I’ve done enough to deserve that nickname,”.

“Done enough…yet,” you mumbled under your breath, feeling a tug at your heart as if you already knew he was on his way there.

“Did you end up dreaming about what happened…after the date?” he asked, not hearing what you mumbled as he started to remember that night himself, the memory of it causing his heart rate to pick up. “Just ‘cause it was pretty hot and special in my opinion,”

You bit your bottom lip at the memory of what he was referring to; you could practically feel yourself going back to that amazing night just thinking about it. You were feeling the way he held you firmly below him, your leg nestled around his waist as his hand gripped your upper thigh with a firm yet gentle touch. You were feeling his hot breath against your cheek as he chanted your name over and over, almost as if he had forgotten every word in the English dictionary and your name was the only word he could remember. You were hearing him chant, “That’s it..that’s my girl..fuck, you’re taking me so well, Y/N”. You were smelling the thin layer of sweat that was coating both your bodies due to your frantic and needy movements. You were seeing his eyes darken with lust, with desire, for you and only you. You felt like you were touching and sliding your hands down his muscular arms and thick chest. You were feeling the way he was sending your body to heaven with each thrust, with each pump of his thick shaft. You were feeling how good he was making you feel all over again, especially in a way he had never before. His heated touch, his intense gaze, and the love-struck look on his face were burned into your memory, and you were feeling and seeing all three of these things from him right now.

That’s how intense the memory was. That’s how intense what happened after the date was. What might happen as a result of this conversation might be just as intense, likely even more since you two had perfected the act since then by repeating it over, and over, and over. Ja’marr was right, you two really spent quite a bit of your time together in bed, usually with no clothes on and coated in sweat, amongst other things.

“Sadly, you woke me up just before I could get to the good stuff,” you breathed out, your skin tingling from the heated memory.

“Damn-,” Joe shook his head before pausing as he glanced over at the group of people walking back into the building. “Oh, looks like we’re good to go back up,” he added before beginning to walk you both over.

Joe threw his arm around your shoulder as you spoke up, “Oh thank god. I need to go back to-,” you began to say before you felt Joe drop his head so his mouth was level with your ear, his hot breath pressing against the corner of your ear.

“Maybe after we go back up we can continue where your dream left off, ya know? Except this time you won’t have to fall asleep to feel that all over again. I can make it happen all over again. Bet this time I can make you scream twice as loud as you did the first time. Maybe even get you past your fear of hurting me and get you to leave some scratches on my back,” he whispered into your ear, his voice laced with fire and promise.

You stared straight ahead, refusing to make eye contact with him, as you two walked back into the building. Joe smirked above you because he knew your silence and lack of heated eye contact was because of his words. Your brain froze for a few seconds before you felt his hand move from your waist and down to your ass, giving it an ample squeeze.

Your breath hitched in your throat as visions of what Joe was promising filled your mind, and boy was it delicious. Your once sleepy body was quickly filled with desire and passion, and you were now running on pure fire. The way he could completely change your mood and vibe was so impressive. It was so effortless. All he had to do was whisper a few things into your ear and touch you like that for you to lose all decency, modesty, and etiquette.

You moved his arm off your shoulder, gripped his hand tightly, and started leading him urgently through the crowd of people in the lobby, your pace was fast and needy. You didn’t care that you were bumping into the other apartment tenets, all you could think about was Joe and his big…warm-.

“Woahh, slow down,” he laughed behind you, amused at how easily he could get you like this–all needy and heated, “You’re moving like your hair’s on fire or something,”.

You glanced back at him with your bottom lip between your teeth, “My hair isn’t, but my body is,” you admitted, the fire behind your eyes sparking something inside both of you. “I don’t think I’m going back to sleep anytime soon. That fire alarm might’ve just been the best thing to happen to me…maybe even you…all day,” you said with a look that made his heart skip a beat…maybe even two beats.

“Really?” he said with a cocky grin.

You gave his hand three gentle squeezes before glancing back at him again, both of you flashing those bedroom eyes at each other. The bedroom eyes were usually his thing, but after spending so much time with him, you picked up on a few things. He was rubbing off on you, and he fucking loved that. “I think we’re going to set it off for real this time,” he winked.

End of Flashback

So what made you wake up? You could sleep through a blaring siren but not through whatever made you wake up now. The breeze wasn’t the explanation, was it? It couldn’t have been something so simple…right?

And it didn’t help that the air around you felt strangely empty too. Something wasn’t right but you weren’t sure what it was and it felt like something was missing, the lack of that something being the reason why your body woke you up. This strange feeling was gnawing at you, refusing to let you slip back into slumber.

You rubbed your eyes again, this time feeling the puffiness around your eyelids, a sad reminder of the way you fell asleep, and a reminder of everything that unfolded a few miserable hours ago. The heaviness was still in your chest, the tight knot of emotion hadn’t loosened yet and flashes of earlier moments filled your mind; the high-intensity moments of the game, the comments from the fans, and everything Joe unloaded on you once he got home.

“Wait,” you whispered. That’s when you noticed the absence of warmth–his warmth. Just a few hours ago, you had your full-time human teddy bear and part-time football player wrapped around you, his arms holding you tightly as if he never wanted to and couldn’t let go. But now, all that was left was a blanket partially tangled around your cold, lonesome body.

“He must’ve moved over,” you whispered, your voice heavy with sleep as you turned your head to look over to his spot next to you. You were expecting to find him sprawled out beside you because he’d done that before–fall asleep on your chest and somehow end up next to you once he woke up–but to your surprise, his spot was empty.

Except for his…t-shirt?

You reached out, scrunching up the soft fabric of his worn-out Fiesta Bowl shirt in your hands, “Where did he go?” you thought to yourself as you felt a twinge of anxiety in your body. You blinked a few more times to adjust to the darkness before shooting up from the bed, “Joe?” you called out as you looked around the room–no response.

“Is he in the bathroom?” you whispered as you looked over, but there was no light coming from there and the door was wide open so he clearly wasn’t inside. It was uncharacteristic of him to get up like this in the middle of the night, especially because he valued his sleep so much during the season.

You slipped out of the bed, planting each foot firmly on the floor and pausing for a few seconds to ground yourself before walking into the closet to see if he was in there, which he wasn’t. You even walked into the bathroom to check again even though you knew it was empty.

“Where did he go?” you asked yourself again as you felt a pit in your stomach form, “Maybe his office?” you wondered as you peeked out into the hallway, but saw there was no light coming from any of the rooms, including his office.

“Joe?” you called out as you stepped out of your bedroom, his shirt in your hand as you waddled down the hallway, your eyes scanning every room and every corner to see if you could find him.

Your footsteps echoed through your quiet home as you searched for him, the shuffling of your feet mixed with the darkness around you almost enough to scare you back into bed. You weren’t really afraid of the dark, but you just hated being alone…hated being away from Joe.

You were letting your mind come up with any excuse for his absence even though you knew everything you came up with was so unlike him. Thinking he was in his office, grabbing a late-night snack downstairs, on the phone with someone important, or out in the backyard for some reason, was pointless because that wasn’t Joe. You wanted to think that he just got up for a simpler reason, but deep down, you felt like you knew exactly where he was.

And your suspicions were proven to be true once you made your way downstairs.

“It’s bad if he’s in there…especially right now,” you sighed to yourself after you made your way through the first floor of the house, now leaning against the kitchen island as you stared at the door next to the garage, a soft glow of light coming from inside the room. “I guess what I said didn’t help him as much as I thought it would,” you said out loud, your voice faltering as you felt a familiar wave of sadness come over you.

You took a deep breath before pushing back from the island and walking towards the room he was in. “I really thought I got through to him a little bit. But I didn’t. I should have, but I couldn’t.” you thought to yourself as you gently pushed the door open, feeling absolutely gutted that he was in there…in the gym.

When you walked into the home gym, you were met with total silence. Well, other than the shuffling sounds of the treadmill Joe was running on. Normally you’d walk into the pumping bass of his music playing over the speakers, but this time it was pure silence. Maybe it being 3 in the morning had something to do with that, but it still felt weird being in total silence.

You looked up and saw Joe running on the sleek black treadmill, his broad, tan, muscular back glistening under the warm light of the gym. He was shirtless, obviously, only clad in workout shorts and shoes. His strong legs were powering through each stride as he stared straight ahead with focus, his Bose earbuds in his ears blocking out any and all noise. Even though you couldn’t see his face, you could tell he was lost in thought, pushing himself harder than usual.

“Fuck..,” you mumbled under your breath, a sense of realization washing over you as you gripped his shirt tighter in your hands. You really wanted to be wrong about finding him in here at this hour of the night, but you always had the worst luck.

Normally, you wouldn’t be fazed about finding Joe in the home gym, it was one of his favorite places in the house. He loved getting a quick workout whenever he could, especially in a place that was his own. But this was more than just him getting a quick workout in, not just because it was the middle of the night. He didn’t do this too often, but whenever he did, it triggered the alarms in your brain. Running on the treadmill in the middle of the night was only done when he needed to clear his head and nothing worked, not even talking to you (so this was rare). It was his last resort, which meant that whatever was weighing on him was so heavy that even you couldn’t lift it off his shoulders. He felt like running calmed his soul, cleared his head, and helped him get away from his problems. And it did. But only temporarily–like a bandaid instead of a stitch.

You let out a sigh as you stood there for a few seconds just watching him run, hoping and silently praying he’d turn around and notice you, but he didn’t.

Some nights when he did this, he noticed you instantly and unknowingly allowed you to coax him back to bed. He wasn’t trying to, but when he looked at you, he had this small pout on his face and this glint in his eyes like he did when he was a baby. Both then and now, that pout meant that he was silently begging for someone to help him and get him out of a zone that caused him discomfort. When he was little, it was to get him out of a zone filled with chaos and high energy that was sometimes too much for a baby to handle, sometimes he just needed nap time. Now, it was to get him out of a darker zone; a zone where he was surrounded by his most destructive thoughts, thoughts that he couldn’t push away. Sometimes, he just needed you.

Luckily for him, you’d always be there to pull him back from the maze of mirrors he found himself in. A maze of mirrors where each frame reflected the worst qualities about himself; his self-doubt, his anxiety, his insecurities. Each glass distorted his image until it became unrecognizable. But you were always there, ready to throw a curtain over the mirror before he got lost in the warped reflections.

But other nights, nights like these, he was so lost in his head–in that maze of wretched mirrors–to the point where everything around him faded away; only two things could make that happen.

One was you.

And the other was his deepest, most critical thoughts.

It should’ve only been you because you made things fade away for a good reason. But tonight, it seemed like he couldn’t block out those stubborn voices and those versions of himself he hated, no matter how much he wanted to. They filled his mind, dimming any and all peaceful thoughts he wanted to cling to.

You closed your eyes for a second, then took a few deep breaths before glancing back to the workout equipment behind you, “Guess I’ll just wait here,” you muttered, walking backward and plopping down on one of the workout benches. You really didn’t want to leave him alone right now, even though you knew he came in here to be by himself. “I can wait for him,” you said, trying to reassure yourself that you had it in you to wait here.

You also couldn’t help but blame yourself for his current state as your mind started to spiral again. Yeah, this was a bad loss and that was enough to make him upset. But everything that happened with you was what pushed him over the edge. He was hurting, still hurting, and you could tell. He was hurting because he felt like he hurt you, and you were hurting because you felt like you hurt him.

Funny, isn’t it? How two people, so deeply and madly in love, can feel so much pain even in their carefully built protective bubble? Each of you thought you were the reason for this mess, but the real culprits hid in the shadows just beyond your reach. They were like silent intruders, slipping through the tiny cracks when neither of you was looking. And here you were, blaming yourselves for a pain that neither of you brought onto yourselves.

—

You don’t know how long you had been sitting on that black workout bench, watching him run and run and run on that treadmill. But you knew it was long enough because of the little moments where you saw him slow himself down, almost because he was tired. But you also saw him shake his head and then continue to power through each stride on the workout machine. He was exhausted, but he wouldn’t let himself admit it.

Every few minutes, you’d say his name, hoping to get him to glance over at you so he could give you the chance to ease him back to bed. “Joe? Joey, please. Come back to bed,” you mumbled, your voice so tired and heavy as you watched him run, and run, and run.

But he wouldn’t even flinch, let alone glance back at you.

“Baby, it’s late. C’mon,”.

“Joey, I know it’s hard but you can’t expect this to make it better,”.

“Joe? Hey? Are you okay?”.

“J, please? We can talk about it upstairs. Just come back with me?”.

But nothing. Nothing each time you said something. Just. Total. Silence.

You were starting to get a little aggravated, not because he wouldn’t budge, but because he wouldn’t look back at you. “Is he ignoring me? Or does he genuinely not feel me behind him?” you asked yourself as you swayed your head to the side to get a good peek at him. His music could only be so loud, it’s not like his headphones were blocking his eyes.

You let out a deep sigh and groaned as your eyes scanned the room in search of something that could get his attention off of running. You saw that there was a yoga ball, a few tennis balls, and some weights in your reach. “I just want his attention. I’m not trying to hurt him,” you laughed in your head before playing with his shirt in your hands without realizing.

But when you did realize that you still had his shirt in your hands, you were scrunching it up into a ball and throwing the fabric at the back of his head in a matter of seconds. “Bullseye!” you smiled to yourself as the shirt directly hit the intended target, “If he saw that throw, he’d be proud,”.

You watched his body flinch after he felt the fabric being thrown at him, the jumpscare a little too much for him because he quickly hit the stop button and flipped around. “Finally,” you grinned as you crossed your arms and waited for him to meet your eyes.

Joe turned around with a semi-startled look on his face, almost enough to make you feel guilty for scaring him since you knew how much he hated being spooked like that. “What the hell?” he panted, his hand moving up to take out his earbud. His breathing seemed to steady out once he realized it was just you, “Y/N? What the hell...are you...are you...doing in here?” he huffed while licking his lips. His face was coated with a generous amount of sweat which made his skin sparkle even more. God, he looked so good.

“And good morning to you too,” you yawned, getting up from the bench and stretching your limbs.

Joe sighed, “Y/N…it’s late. Go to sleep,” while threading his fingers through his damp hair, then using his hand to wipe the sweat off his forehead.

“Joe, it’s late. Let’s go to sleep,” you smiled back as you mimicked his tone, tugging on the sleeves of your sweatshirt to feel a comfortable warmth that was similar to the warmth your bed offered.

He rolled his eyes, his frustration and sadness clearly speaking for him based on the look in his eyes and his stiff body language. “Stop being difficult and just go back to sleep. I’m fine,” he spat out, flipping back around and hitting the start button on the treadmill again. His words felt like a punch to the gut, and he knew that very well because of the immediate regret that filled his tired body. “Why the hell did I say that to her? What’s wrong with me?”.

You felt your heart sink, the weight of his words settling heavily on your chest. You watched him tense up, his fingers flexing and releasing at his sides out of internal frustration and confusion. “Lying to my face yet again? Come on, Joe. I thought we moved past the shutting me out phase. You promised,” you thought to yourself, anxiously playing with the blue topaz birthstone, his birthstone, necklace around your neck as you felt the tension in the room.

You know he’s pushing you away again, but you refuse to back down because you know in your head he needs you more than anything. He was building that hard shell again, fragile but stubborn, shielding him from you in a way you knew he thought was protective.

You walked over to him slowly, “Joe, it’s been a long day,” you breathed out. “You’re tired, rightfully so. And I’m tired too. Why don’t we just go back to bed and figure this out tomorrow? You’ve had a really shitty night and I think sleep is best for you right now,”.

He didn’t respond, didn’t even glance back at you. All you heard was just the quiet hum of the treadmill as you watched him continue to run. But you knew he heard you since his headphones weren’t in his ears, and his extra tense back muscles gave away more than he intended.

“It’s not good for you to put this much pressure on yourself, baby. You’ve had a long day, a long week. You need to relax,” you added, taking two more steps forward.

Still nothing.

“Shit,” you muttered under your breath, your palms feeling clammy because you could feel his stress and tension radiating off him and melting into your body. “He’s not budging. This always works…why is it not working?” the thoughts in your brain were loud, banging from wall to wall and making your head spin.

“Alright,” you mumbled, shaking your head to push away those agonizing thoughts, “Guess he wants to do this the hard way,” moving closer to Joe and walking around the treadmill so you were standing in front of him. Your eyes slowly move up his chiseled chest as you took in his appearance, the way sweat clung to his muscular frame made his chest glisten in the glow of the room. You felt a rush of heat pool in your belly–seeing him like this always left you a little weak. “Oh, come on,” you thought while shaking your head to push away those types of thoughts.

You moved your eyes up, meeting his icy baby blues which somehow seemed cold yet burned with anger. There was no relief there, just a sharpness that made your heartache. The tension in his body matched the intensity in his eyes, his muscles were taut with the same pressure. He was seconds away from exploding if you made the wrong move, you knew you needed to handle him gently.

“Joe…,” you said softly, placing a hand on each side of the treadmill screen to catch his attention, which worked. You saw his eyes peek down at your hands, his pace slightly slowing as he met your eyes again. “Stop running, Joe,” you pleaded, your voice gentle but firm, urging him to hear you out and not push himself away.

His eyes were locked in on yours for a few seconds, his softening gaze nearly made it feel as if he was trying to hand himself over to you. It felt like he was ready to give in, but then, almost as if he couldn’t help himself, his finger inched up the screen and tapped the button to increase the speed. The little chime echoed between you both, and in that moment, it felt like the wall fell back down.

“Is he messing with me?” you thought to yourself as your grip on the screen became tighter.

The fact that he had been disregarding your wishes for what felt like an hour was bothering you way more than it should have. You knew why he was behaving like this, understanding where this dismissive attitude was coming from, but you couldn’t help but feel angry at the way he was acting with you right now.

You let out a drained sigh, your shoulders slumping as you slowly release your grip on the screen. His eyes never left you as he watched you stare down at your feet, feeling utterly helpless and small. You tried everything, said everything, but nothing seemed to stick with him. There was nothing more you felt like you could say or do, and the ache in your heart grew once you realized that.

But as you stared down at your manicured toes, you remembered a somewhat similar moment from a few months ago where the roles were reversed. Joe wasn’t the only one who got like this when something went wrong in his work life. You did too.

A few months ago, you had been working on a crucial, tedious, and time-consuming project for work. You knew this was your shot–the one that would prove your worth, the one that could bag you that promotion you’d been eyeing for so long. Every detail had to be perfect; you were putting in long hours and pushing yourself way beyond your threshold. Just when things felt like they were finally coming together, when you were about to hand it all in, it all came crashing down. One small mistake, one missed deadline, or maybe a combination of both, and the project was a failure. Your heart sank and you could feel the weight of the loss pushing down on you, knowing you had worked so hard for nothing. It was a blow to your confidence, and for a moment, it felt like all that effort had been useless.

You came home that night with the most defeated look on your face, feeling like an absolute disappointment. All you wanted to do was cry, lock yourself in the bedroom for a week, and wallow in sadness. And you would have done that–if it weren’t for him. The man who promised to wipe away your tears for as long as he could, your Joey.

He spent the whole evening being there for you in the smallest yet most thoughtful ways. Each time your eyes pooled with ears, he was ready. He plucked a tissue from the box and held it to your nose, murmuring gentle reminders for you to blow. He refilled your glass with ice water each hour because he knew how chewing on the cubes somehow cooled your face down, a comforting ritual of yours after crying that he had memorized. Each time a tear formed in your eye, his thumb was right there before it had the chance to make it down your cheek. He sat with you, promising that mistakes like this happened more than you realized. He offered to talk to your boss and take on whatever came his way as long as he could lighten the burden on your shoulders. But most importantly, he held you close and the quiet reassurance, the gentleness of his touch, and the sweetness of his words reminded you how deeply he loved you and how he’d be right by your side no matter what.

But nothing he was saying really stuck with you, just like how nothing you said stuck with him right now. But Joe didn’t give up once he realized his words weren’t doing anything. Instead, he got an idea–a more Joe-like idea–to get you to relax which involved releasing some…pent-up tension in your body.

So then as you stared at your manicured toes while laying on the bed with him, your mind wandering to all the different scenarios that would play out when you went back to work, you suddenly felt his soft, pillowy lips press slow, wet kisses down your neck. His lips trailed down your arm while his warm hand lifted your shirt and pressed against your bare skin, then his lips moved to your hips and belly. Each kiss caused your stomach to flutter from excitement and your brain to become clouded with only thoughts of him. And the next thing you knew, his head was stuck between your legs, his large hands gripping your thighs and holding them open, his cold nose rubbing against your clit, and your back arching off the bed as his name repeatedly fell from your lips.

Work was the last thing on your mind after that.

So maybe it was time to use reverse psychology?

Screw gentle.

If he could get you to relax by grabbing your attention that way, maybe you could do the same? It was uncharacteristic of you to use sex as a way to distract him, but it was worth a shot. You just needed him to get off of the treadmill and somehow tire him out enough to pass out as soon as he hit the pillow. This…might just work? No, it definitely will work. Joe couldn’t resist the temptation when given the chance. No way would he be able to hold back from this.

“Joe’s hormones, don’t fail me now,” you thought to yourself as you looked back up, your hand reaching down to grasp the hem of your crewneck sweatshirt, lifting it just enough for him to catch a peek of what was underneath–or more accurately, what wasn’t. You pulled the fabric up slowly, revealing your bare thighs and the lacy purple panties that he could never resist, the ones that always drove him mad no matter the mood he was in. You saw his eyes flash, breaking away from the stare he’d been giving the treadmill screen.

This was perfect.

“Joe,” you said, a playful tone lacing your words. “Why don’t you come back to bed with me?” you finished, your sweatshirt now fully off as you threw it to the side, your bare chest now on display for him. The cool air drifting through the room felt like a kiss to your bare body, but the heat in his gaze burned hotter than anything the cold could offer; it was enough to make your knees tremble.

His eyes widened at the display in front of him, and for a split second, you saw a crack in the wall between you. He gripped the sidebar tightly, his knuckles turning white as he steadied himself, nearly stumbling over his own feet. You knew your little stunt had hit a nerve…the perfect nerve.

“Careful,” you teased, your voice dripping with need. “I’d hate for you to trip, baby,”.

His eyebrow shot up, a mix of surprise and desire on his face. His jaw clenched, the tension in his body palpable as his cheeks flushed to the same color as the mark on your collarbone he would love to leave in heated moments like these.

Ohhh yeah. You hit the nerve. Bullseye.

“What’re..you doing,” he said, his voice dipping down as he saw you reach up to untie your messy bun, your soft, silky hair falling down your bare back like a mystical waterfall.

You let out a low chuckle, “Getting you to stop running, duh,” as you gave his body another slow once-over, and this time, he noticed it.

The look you were giving him, mimicking the same bedroom eyes he’d often give you, made his body react instantly. The tension between you turned to electricity, and he could feel the growing heat in his shorts, the tent tightening with every passing second.

“Y- you’re unbelievable,” he scoffed, shaking his head as a small, reluctant smile tugged at the corner of his lips. But instead of stepping down, he tapped the speed button again and went back to looking ahead, refocusing on his run as if he were trying to shake off the effect you were having on him.

“Nope, juuuuust relentless,” you winked.

The heat between you both was hard to deny and you could tell he was slowly cracking with the way his face would scrunch up when he ran a little too fast. The hardness growing in his boxers made it incredibly uncomfortable to run and you were enjoying every second of him pretending like he wasn’t bothered by it. The stiffness straining against his shorts was practically begging for the attention you were offering, despite how hard he was trying to keep it under control.

You stood there in front of him, letting your eyes wander up and down his body with purpose, occasionally turning around so he could get a view of your bare back and the curve of your hips, just doing whatever you could to break his front. The sounds of his small, frustrated groans and his breath hitching told you that you were hitting your mark. One specific thing you did really got to him though. You leaned forward, resting your arms on top of the treadmill screen so that your chest was fully visible, your breasts dangling right in front of him. You could feel his restraint slipping, piece by piece. His sharp intake of breath and the way his eyes darkened once he looked at you confirmed it. You had him right where you wanted.

“Y/N, stop,” he snapped, his gaze dropping to your pretty pink lips which he desperately needed to feel everywhere.

“Make me,” you challenged, batting your eyes at him in mockery.

“If you’re soooo horny, go upstairs and take care of it yourself. It’s not like you haven’t before when I’m not here,” he sneered, the twinkle in your eyes letting him know exactly what you were up to. “Just do whatever and leave me alone,”.

Those three words felt like a fastball to the face. No way was he on this again, not after the conversations you two had the past week. “Oh hell no.” you thought to yourself, feeling even more irritated by his behavior because he was acting the same way he did after the game last week. You weren’t going to let him push you away this time, not after everything you’ve helped him through.

But maybe, just maybe pushing his buttons was the answer? You knew how Joe operated all too well; when he got heated, the wall he built crumbled fast and he’d be too focused on that fire. If you could light that fire just enough, maybe he’d finally let go. “Oh, I’m going to hell for this,” you mumbled under your breath, bracing yourself for the words that were about to fall from your mouth. “Here we go again with the ‘leave me alone’ act,” you groaned, seeming more pissed than you actually were in order to make him mad. “Joe, I love you. But please stop with the bullshit because it’s giving me whiplash,”.

“What bullshit?” he questioned, his brows furrowing in offense. He was slightly taken aback by the tone of your voice–usually playful but now rough. It was laced with a kind of frustration even he couldn’t ignore.

“You know what I’m talking about,” you rolled your eyes, leaning back so that your entire body was in his view again. “It’s the middle of the night and I’ve been in here for the past hour trying to help you out of this funk but you just won’t quit it with this bullshit,”.

Joe’s gaze sharpened, “Again, what bullshit.” his lips pressed into a thin line.

You let out a snarky laugh, “This whole ‘leave me alone’ bullshit, the ‘i’m fine’ bullshit. You’re not fine Joe and it’s okay to admit that. Saying you’re not fine doesn’t make you any less of a man, trust me,”.

“You better watch what you say, Y/N,” he quickly retorted, raising an eyebrow at your arrogance. His voice dripped with warning and intrigue, he was warning you to watch your mouth but he was just as curious to hear what you had to say.

“Or what? Or what, Joe?” you snapped back. “I’m so sick of seeing you act like this; being dismissive doesn’t fucking solve anything. And you know what else? I am so sick of you acting like this with me. Just hours ago you were stuck to me like glue and now it’s like you’re avoiding me like the plague. I’m also so sick of getting hundreds of messages asking how you’re doing. What the hell am I supposed to say to them? ‘I don’t know how my own boyfriend is doing because he refuses to tell me and acts like I’m not here?’ Spare me the embarrassment, Joe. I can’t deal with these funks where you’re all over me, confiding in me and then hours later you’re acting like I’m a piece of gum stuck to your shoe that won’t go away,”.

“You know, I didn’t ask you to come in here,” he interjected, continuing to run on the treadmill at full force, his words shaky as he was trying to catch his breath. His eyes trailed up and down your body, and even in this tense moment, he was captivated by your raw beauty. You looked angelic in this light, even though you had just woken up and had a rough evening prior. Your hair was slightly messy, but messy in a way that he adored. The soft light of the room gave you an ethereal glow which made it hard for him to look away. And your face…oh, your face. The softness, and the gentle curve of your full lips both made him feel an ache deep within his heart. All he wanted to do was pull you to his lips and never stop kissing you, despite feeling aggravated by your words. “I didn’t ask you to care, Y/N,”.

You tipped your head back in frustration, but reminding yourself that you needed to keep your cool with him or this would turn into a screaming match too fast. You closed your eyes and took another deep breath, “Yikes. Okay, maybe I’m pushing his buttons a little too hard. Deep breaths, Y/N,”.

“You don’t need to ask me, Joe,” you replied once you opened them, your words much softer now that you eased up. “We’re like magnets, Joey. I go where you go and you go where I go…we’ve always been that close. Since LSU? You know that. It’s always just been you and me no matter the circumstance or situation, we count on each other for everything and you promised me that when you told me you loved me. I know when you’re not okay even when you try your hardest to hide it from me. I just want you to let me be there for you like I always have…and I don’t care if you think pushing me away is protecting me. I love you more than anything in this world and you will always come first for me no matter what. I’ll always be there for you, even if I get caught in the line of fire,” you said, your voice heavy with despair. “You need me, and I’m there. I’m always there,”.

The words, “I’m always there” echoed in his brain as his gaze fell to the floor, then back to your wary eyes, almost as if he was trying to decide whether to give in or keep holding his front. He felt your words, he felt the weight of your words. He felt how badly you wanted to help him and get him out of his head. But he didn’t want to hurt you more than he already had, that’s why he was pushing you out again. He couldn’t stand the sight of you wiping your tears after he walked away, or hearing you try to stifle your sniffles to spare his feelings or stare into your bloodshot eyes, knowing he was the cause of your pain. You were his delicate Y/N, the one person who was as fragile as a feather but strong as a block of concrete…for him. You promised to protect him at all costs no matter what happened, sometimes even putting herself in the line of fire just to shield him. And in his own twisted way, he thought pushing you away from him was protecting you.

But what he didn’t realize–what he never seemed to understand–was that pushing you away only hurt you both more. You weren’t afraid of his broken pieces or his rough edges because you knew how to hold the shattered pieces together. You knew how to soften the edges. He tried to push you away time and time again, but you always fought it. And now he understood why. To you, his rough edges and shattered pieces weren’t something to run from–it was something to love through. To you, they weren’t flaws to be fixed, but unique parts to be cherished. You saw beauty in his resilience, strength in his vulnerability, and passion in his devotion to protecting the ones he loved the most. He wasn’t anything like what those idiots said, he was far from it.

You saw him for him. You loved him for him. No matter what was said, what was done, what baggage he carried, you loved him. You never backed away from him when his entire world felt like it was imploding. He had never met anyone like that…anyone like you.

Why should he push away the best thing that ever happened to him? Why should he let his fears build walls to separate you when all you ever wanted to do was hold him closer, to remind him that he was enough just as he was? You were protective over the ones you loved and he knew that, but you were protective over Joe more than anyone or anything else.

He’d always allowed you to be there for him, but this time he was doing everything in his power to push back from you. That was not like him at all. He’d always been open with you, seeking solace in your arms, falling asleep to your reassuring, sweet words, getting lost under your protective touch, and breathing in your calming scent. He’d never been the one to ignore you, snap at you, and make you feel overlooked. But ever since the wrist injury, he had moments, phases, where he would get like this; those phases and moments hurt you more than anything any fan could ever say. It hurt you because he pulled away, something he’d never done. In the beginning, you couldn’t figure out why, which scared the hell out of you, and luckily he realized before it was too late. The guilt was almost unbearable at times when he saw you come down with puffy eyes or give him a shaky response. But as time passed and he slowly started to let you in, you understood why he acted the way he did–and it had nothing to do with you.

This time, however, it had everything to do with you. The game went pretty badly and he was being overly critical about himself as usual, but that’s not what did it for him. Those awful comments people spat at you, his girl? That was where he drew the line. That should’ve been enough for him to comfort you, to hold you for as long as he could, to be there for you. But instead, he was running further from you, shutting himself out, and making you come after him. He didn’t even think about how upset you must be feeling, how difficult it must be to hide it from him because you didn’t want to burden him with anything else.

“I’m not fine…I haven’t been fine in months and neither has she. She puts this strong front to protect me and I never even realize how much she must be dealing with right now, how much she must be juggling with me, work, and football. She’s not a robot, she’s hurting too,” he thought to himself as his eyes trailed back to yours, seeing the pain behind your pupils. “Let go, Joe. She’s right there for you. Stop being a hardass and let her be there for you. You’re killing her,”.

“Joe,” you whispered softly, your voice trembling as if you were on the verge of tears, “I’m not going anywhere. Let me in, p- please?”.

“Let her in, Joe. It’s just Y/N, the girl you’ve loved ever since she showed up at your door with a bag of caramel apple suckers to apologize for crashing football practice. She didn’t have to do that, but she showed up and did. This is the girl that is the first one to come find you after a brutal loss, knowing how much of a detached asshole you’d be in the heat of the moment. She doesn’t have to, but she shows up and does it anyway. This is the woman you want to marry as soon as possible. Why? Because she has always been there for you through thick and thin–she never once has gone back on her promise to be by your side until her wheels fall off. Lots of people in your life came and went and left you high and dry but she never did that to you. She could have, she had so many chances to run for the hills and never look back, but she didn’t. If you keep pushing her away, you’ll push her away for good. You can’t lose her. You can’t live without her. The thought of losing her makes your chest physically hurt,” he thought to himself, feeling that subtle sting in his chest he was thinking about.

“I love you, Joe. You don’t have to figure this out alone. I can handle it, whatever it is. Just tr- trust me,” you swallowed, your voice cracking again as you felt the emotional waters push against the mental dam you had built in your mind to keep Joe dry. “Keep it together, Y/N,” you told yourself.

“Trust her. Trust her. Trust her,” Joe’s subconscious whispered, a mantra meant to bring him to his senses. He let out a deep breath, his voice a barely audible mumble as the words left him, “I trust you.” It was so soft, you couldn’t hear him, but even saying it out loud seemed to open something within him. You never gave him a reason to not trust you which meant whatever you were saying, you meant every word.

You noticed the way his shoulders dropped, tension oozing out of him like air from a balloon. His vulnerability was almost palpable–but it wasn’t just that. There was something else now, something charged, bubbling just beneath the surface. “I need to do something to get her to relax. She won’t tell me how she’s feeling straight up, but I know she’s like a glass of water filled to the brim, each drop teetering on the edge before it spills over in an uncontrollable flood,” his inner voice said, the thought flipping a switch deep inside him. Joe wasn’t oblivious to your habit of putting everyone else before yourself–it was one of the things he admired about you, but it also frustrated him. He hated seeing you push your own emotions to the side. And now, with you standing in front of him, he could see through the cracks in your armor–the water dancing on the edge of the glass–the quiet exhaustion you tried to mask so well for him.

His stare darkened as the air shifted between you, thick with an implied intensity. His lips curved into a smirk, and the hesitation that had hypnotized him earlier seemed to melt away in an instant. “You know…,” he began, his voice low, laced with a heat that sent a shiver down your spine, “You’re playing a risky game, Y/N,”.

You blinked at him, caught off guard by the sudden change in his demeanor.

Joe’s eyes roamed over your body, slow and unapologetic, lingering in a way that made your skin catch on fire. The smirk on his lips deepened, and he tilted his head slightly, the energy between you crackling like lightning.

“Out here with no clothes on and that look in your eyes…,” he murmured, his tone both teasing and commanding, leaving no doubt that he was fully aware of the effect he had on you.

Oh.

Your breath hitched, the heat pooling in your belly as your heartbeat quickened, “Oh, I- I…,” you stammered, your words twisting in your throat.

He chuckled softly, “What’s the matter, lovey? Lost your words?”.

Oh?

You stared into his deep blue eyes, and something was different. Something had shifted. The wall you’d seen there before, was…gone?

Wait. Was it really gone? The tension, the guarded demeanor–just melted away? Your teasing, your soft words, the way you’d carefully nudged him…did it actually work? You weren’t exactly doubting your ability to break through to him, but this was Joe. Joe, who could be as immovable as a brick wall when he wanted to be. Joe, who sometimes made you work for every crack in his armor. Your heart skipped a beat at the realization. The icy look in his eyes, the stoic front just…gone. Now it was just the Joe you knew. The Joe who trusted you. The Joe that made you smile in moments like these–where you were far from happy. Your Joe.

You weren’t sure what exactly did it for him but whatever it was, it made him laugh. It made him genuinely laugh. And whatever it was, you sure as hell weren’t going to grill him about it right now.

Now, it was time for step two: release the tension in his mind and body in the best way possible.

“No,” you shook your head, “Just…distracted,” as you slowly walked around the treadmill. You lifted your hand to glide across his sweaty arm, lightly scratching his bare skin with your manicured nails, “You can’t be in here looking like this…with no shirt…covered in sweat…and expect me to act normal about it,”. Joe’s eyes darted to where your nails danced on his arm, his breath hitching for a brief moment before his gaze met yours again, a mixture of amusement and something stronger swirling within them.

“You’re trouble,” he said, a little breathless as you pushed yourself away from him and started twirling around the empty space in the gym.

“Ohhh noooo. I guess you’ll have to arrest me, officer,” you pouted, a mischievous glimmer behind your soft eyes which resulted in another chuckle from your boyfriend. Your lips curled into a playful grin as you circled him like a predator stalking her prey. “There’s that laugh,” you murmured, your tone light as you moved closer to him. “I knew it was in there somewhere. You’ve been holding out on me, Burrow,”.

Joe raised an eyebrow, his smirk growing as he watched your every move. “What are you up to, Y/N?” he asked, a hint of pleasure mixing with curiosity in his voice.

“Oh, me?” you joked, acting innocent as you came around to stand in front of him. “I’m just here to help…you know, ease some of that tension you’ve been carrying around all night,”.

He tilted his head, that familiar spark of mischief returning to his eyes after he understood what you were implying. “You’re playing with fire, you know that? Gotta be careful,”.

“And yet,” you shot back, stepping just a little closer, “You’re still standing here, letting me,” you said, your voice just above a whisper.

Your eyes stayed zoned in on his, observing how that little sparkle burnt brighter behind his as a heavy silence fell between you. You knew the effect you had on him, and it was only a matter of seconds before he gave into that need–that need to feel you everywhere. You watched the tension in his jaw increase, how his chest heaved a little harder, and his eyes dropping to your lips and chest. You also saw the twinge of discomfort on his face which stemmed from the growing tent in his workout shorts.

“Any second,” you smirked to yourself.

You continued to look at him with those heated eyes, waiting for the moment when he gave into his desire, his need to feel you. You knew him too well, which meant you also knew exactly how to set him off. “Well…guess I should just go take care of it myself then. Shouldn’t I?” you teased, slowly inching back from him. Joe absolutely hated not being the one to get you off when you needed to feel liquid bliss coursing through your veins. The idea of you sprawled across your shared bed, your fingers between your thighs, his name falling from your lips, and for him to not be there? That drove him wild.

And as if on cue, his hand slammed down on the power button, the treadmill abruptly stopping. Then you watched as he stepped down while his other hand reached out, gripping your wrist with a firm but gentle hold. Before you had the chance to say something, he pulled you closer. Your bare chest brushed against his slick, sweat-covered torso, “Hell no,” he mumbled.

Your lips parted, but nothing came out. Yeah, the effect you had on him was strong and powerful. But when it came down to this, you were a pile of goo in his hands. He knew that and you knew that even better.

He leaned in closer, his lips ghosting over your ear as his voice sent a shiver down your spine, “You wanna play with fire, baby? Well congratulations. You just got burned,”.

And again, before you had a chance to say something, his mouth was on yours. His large hands slide down to your sides, gripping your hips with a possessiveness that makes your knees weak. The heat of his body radiated to yours as he walked you both backward; you were so lost in the lustful haze that surrounded you to realize where you were going. “Mmph,” you moaned into the kiss, feeling the hardness in his boxers brush against your upper thigh. “Please,” you whimpered, feeling his lips mash against yours in a slow, sultry movement. “Joe,”.

Suddenly, he pulled away from you and plopped down onto the padded bench behind him, then pulled you down with him before you could catch your breath. His strong arms held you firmly in his lap, each of your legs around him as you straddled him in place. “What am I going to do with you now, huh?” he murmured as his lips traveled from your lips, down your neck, and ghosted over your collarbone. “With all that shit you said to me…I shouldn’t be doing this. You were running that pretty little mouth of yours a little too much tonight,”.

“Joe…,” you whispered, your breath hitching as his other hand slid up your back, tangling in your hair and tugging at the soft, silky strands. Each kiss he pressed was slow, wet, and hot against your skin; he was savoring every inch of you.

“What, lovey?” he whispered as his lips went back up the path he traced.

You threw your head to the side, allowing his lips to explore parts of your skin he hadn’t adored yet, “Joey, please…I need it,”.

A low chuckle left his lips, “What’s got you so worked up, hm?”.

“You…,” you gasped, feeling him attach his lips to the sweet spot on your neck. “I told you…you look so-,”.

“Me?” he rasped as he moved up your neck. “Have you seen yourself? You look gorgeous, and this?,” his fingers toying with the waistband of your purple lace panties, “These are driving me fucking insane,” he chuckled.“You always look beautiful for me, so effortless and sexy,”.

A rush of heat flooded your body at his words, at his touch, leaving you breathless. His scruff grazed against your delicate skin, sending a rousing mix of roughness and warmth down your spine. Your hips had a mind of their own as they slowly rocked back and forth against Joe’s, his reaction telling you that you were slowly getting through to him in another way…a more pleasurable way. His lips found your ear, brushing against the corner as he whispered, his voice deep and low, “Mmm, yeah…That’s a good girl.”.

His words ignited a fire within you, your hips instinctively shifting against him in another strong movement, pressing into the hardness you could now feel straining against his shorts. His hands gripped your hips tighter, keeping you steady as he began to guide your movements, enticing soft gasps from your lips. “You’re making it really hard for me to hold back, baby,” he murmured, the heat of his breath tickling your ear as you rocked back and forth on his cock, your panties soaked from your arousal. His fingers trailed up your side, leaving goosebumps in their path before they dipped beneath the waistband and down to your dripping heat.

“Oh,” you whimpered, his knuckles brushing against your slick core, as he watched your reaction. "Joe…," you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper, a mixture of desperation and desire. “P- please…need to feel you…,”.

His lips curved into a smirk against your neck as his fingers moved deeper, exploring your warmth. “So needy…is that why you did this…strip naked? Say all that shit to me? To get my attention?”. One thick finger slid in, your walls immediately clenching around it as he pushed it deeper.

“O- Ohhh,” you sputtered, then dropped your head onto his shoulder, your hips slowly moving back and forth against his–now damp–shorts.

“That’s it,” he praised, his voice dripping with satisfaction as his scruff pressed harder against the sensitive skin of your neck. You’d never get tired of feeling his scratchy scruff against your skin. Whenever you felt it on you, your body knew that you were in for a treat. He then added another finger, his movements rhythmic, precise, and torturously amazing. “You feel so damn perfect, baby,” he whispered, his fingers pumping in and out of your dripping heat with a faint squelching sound. “So tight around my fingers,” he whispered before planting a kiss to your neck. Your hands found his shoulders, clutching onto him for stability as his mouth returned to your ear, his deep groan making your body tremble. “I should hate you for teasing me like that…but how can I when you’re being so good to me now?”.

“F- fuck,” you whimpered, your eyes fluttering shut as you felt his fingers graze over your sweet spot. “I- I didn’t mean to…tease you. I just w- wanted to help, oh,” you said, each word struggling to come out of your mouth because of your soft gasps and moans.

“You’re always so helpful, aren’t you?” he hummed, pressing a soft kiss under your ear. “That’s why I love you so much,”.

The pressure built within you as his fingers moved expertly, curling in ways that made your body dance to the beat of his drum. His lips left a trail of wet, open-mouthed kisses down your neck and to your collarbone, each one sending shockwaves through you. “Agh, Joe, I’m so close,” you whimpered, barely able to form coherent thoughts as the tension inside you coiled tighter and tighter.

“That’s my girl…such a good girl,” he whispered against your ear, his lips brushing so close that you felt the pressure of every word. “Let go for me, baby. Show me how much you love me,”.

“Joe, fuck…I-,” you started to say until your breath caught in your throat from the tight feeling in your lower belly. A few more strong pumps later, “Fuck, oh fuck!” you screamed, your body trembling as your walls clenched around his thick fingers and you reached your high, your fingers pulling at his hair.

“That’s it, baby. Let go,” he murmured against your skin, his deep voice wrapping around you like a soft blanket of security. His strong arms held you tightly, grounding you through the intense waves of pleasure coursing through your body as he pressed a few wet kisses along the curve of your neck. His fingers slowed their pace, a delicate, intimate touch now helping you back down from the high he had guided you to. His lips moved up to press soft, tender kisses to your temple, whispering unspoken promises with each one.

Joe knew you were holding back your own emotions as well, likely so that you didn’t burden him with more weight than he already was dealing with. He knew that you had tension built up inside of you, and he noticed that as soon as he got home and saw your eyes. You’d spent the entire night focusing on him, hiding your own thoughts and fears which he knew were eating away at you. He hated seeing you carry that silent load, hated knowing you were sacrificing your own peace for his. That wasn’t how this worked. You needed release, and Joe was determined to give it to you–to make sure you felt just as cared for as he did.

“You’re everything to me, Y/N,” he whispered, his voice taking on a softer tone as his hands gently smoothed over your back. “Everything I’ll ever need,”.

You felt the room spin when you opened your eyes, your body trembling and your mind clouded by the aftermath of your orgasm. Every nerve in your body was alive, buzzing from the way Joe had just untangled you. Your chest heaved as you tried to catch your breath, and the first thing your cloudy vision focused on was Joe’s face. His eyes, glossed over with a mix of desire and sincerity, locked onto yours. They had an intensity that sent another shiver down your spine. The heat between you was substantial, and when you shifted slightly, you felt the unmistakable hardness beneath you, pressing firmly against your core. “Joe,” you whispered again, your voice shaky from the tingling sensation in your body.

He didn’t say a word at first but his hands slid up your back, pulling you closer as if he couldn’t stand even the smallest distance between you. His lips opened slightly, his breathing ragged as his forehead came to rest against yours, his damp hair brushing against your skin. “You’re incredible,” he said, his voice low and husky, sending a fresh wave of warmth coursing through you. “Don’t ever let anyone make you think you’re not, okay?” he said, his hands gripping your hips, keeping you anchored to him, the tension between you far from disappearing.

You bit your lip, your body still trembling as you leaned forward, your lips brushing against his. “I love you, Joe,” you whispered, the words barely audible but filled with meaning. You then pressed your lips against his, feeling yourself ease up when you felt his tongue enter your mouth with no hesitation.

The groan that escaped his throat was enough to give away how much he needed you, how much he needed to consume you and be consumed by you. His grasp tightened as he shifted beneath you to try to ignore his hardening cock, but he moved a little too quickly and accidentally jerked his hips up toward you. “Mmm,” he hissed, feeling his sensitive erection grow at the contact with your soaked heat. Although he didn’t want to, he forced himself to abruptly pull away from your lips because of the aching need in his shorts that was getting harder to ignore, “I’m not done with you yet, baby,” he reminded both you and himself.

You gave a lazy nod, your body melting against his as he moved under you. With a firm grip on your waist, he planted his feet on the ground and stood effortlessly, holding you as if you weighed nothing. You buried your face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the comforting, familiar scent of him–clean, warm, and unmistakably Joe. The gentle scrape of his scruff against your cheek sent a pang of arousal right down to your core again.

Your arms wrapped around his neck, and while he carried you, the soft light of the room caught the promise ring on your left hand. The delicate shimmer of the diamonds made your lips curl into a faint smile, a silent reminder of everything you’d promised to one another–the love, the loyalty, and the unspoken vow that neither of you would let go, no matter how difficult things might get.

He carried you over to the couch in the corner of the gym, his steps slow and relaxed. His lips brushed against your cheek to plant a quick kiss as he mumbled, “You okay, babe?”.

You nodded against him, your voice muffled as you whispered, “Perfect,”.

A chuckle left his lips, “Yeah, you are,” he replied, knowing that when you were with him, ‘perfect’ was always the answer.

He reached the plush couch and gently lowered you onto the cushions, before straightening up and flashing you with a look so intense it sent a wave of heat coursing through every inch of your body. That long, lingering stare had you squirming below him, desperate for him to touch you again.

Without breaking eye contact, he slipped out of the last bit of his clothes, his muscles flexing with every small movement. When he finally leaned down, his weight settling over you, the warmth of his bare skin against yours made you shiver. His hands were planted on either side of you, caging you in, but it never felt suffocating–it felt safe. He hovered there, close enough for his breath to mix with yours as his deep blue eyes searched your face, silently asking for reassurance. Any doubt or hesitation in his mind disappeared the second he saw the love reflected in your gaze. “You’re all I’ll ever need,” he whispered, brushing his lips tenderly over yours like a prayer. “You’re the only good thing in my life, and I’m so fucking lucky to have you,”.

His words should have triggered something–a little siren in your brain, an alarm to unpack the weight of what he’d just said. The only good thing in his life? The significance of that sentence should have hit you harder. But the way he said it–the raw vulnerability in his voice, the tenderness of his touch–made your thoughts blur. The intoxicating mix of love and lust overpowered everything else, and all you could focus on was him and this intimate moment.

“Joe,” you whispered softly, though it wasn’t a protest. If anything, it was a plea.

That was all it took for him to close the distance again, his mouth stuck on yours in a kiss that was as desperate as it was soft. Each tug and push was more demanding than the last. His teeth grazed your lower lip before pulling it lightly, earning a soft whimper from you that urged him on. His hands roamed your sides, sliding down to grip your hips possessively. “You drive me crazy, you know that?” he murmured against your lips, his breath hot and uneven. “Don’t know what I’d do without you,”.

Your chest heaved as you tried to catch your breath, your voice coming out in a whisper. “You don’t have to. I’m here, Joe. Always,”.

He smirked, but his eyes softened at your words. “Damn right you are,” he murmured before dipping his head to trail kisses along your jawline and down your neck. His scruff scraped against your sensitive skin, sending shivers down your spine as his lips latched onto a sweet spot just below your ear. You gasped, your grip on his hair tightening as he sucked and nipped at the tender skin, leaving his mark for you to find later. “Joe,” you breathed, your voice trembling as his hands slid under your thighs, pulling you impossibly closer.

“Shh, baby,” he grunted, his lips brushing against your ear. “Let me take care of you. Just let go,”.

His hands gripped your hips with a force that caused your vision to go hazy as he adjusted himself above you. When he finally pushed into you, slow and gently, your body arched against him. A breathy moan escaped your lips as he filled you completely, every inch of him sending sparks of pleasure coursing through you. “Oh, shit,” you moaned, your mouth falling open as you dug your head back into the couch.

“God, baby,” he rasped, his forehead resting against yours as his hips began to move, his thrusts slow but deep. “You feel…so fucking good,” he moaned, his lips just inches from yours to the point where your breaths were mixing.

“Joe,” you whimpered, your nails digging into his back as he set a steady, rhythmic pace. You could feel the remnants of his sweat on his back, the pheromonic smell of it sending you into another dimension. It mixed with his natural scent, and all of that was now pressing onto your body, the air around you smelling like a delicious cocktail of natural musk, sweat, and sex. Each thrust was precise, hitting that spot inside you that made your toes curl. “Please…don’t stop. Don’t ever s- stop,”.

His lips brushed over your ear as he whispered, “Don’t worry, baby. I’m not stopping until you can’t think of anything but me,”. His pace quickened slightly, each roll of his hips deliberate and full of intent.

You moved your hands along the curves of his sculpted back, feeling his large muscles and the slowly loosening tension beneath his golden skin. “Joey,” you gasped, your voice trembling. “Please…I- do whatever you have to do…to relax…f- fuck,”.

You wanted him to let go, fully let go. You needed him to let go. It may have been difficult to break through the tension in his mind right now, but you knew that this would help him. There was so much tension pent up inside of his body from the field and from what happened off the field, he needed to let go, and you were right there to help him.

“Oh, I will,” he murmured, matter of factly. “I just need to hear you first. Can you do that for me? Be a little louder? Use that pretty little mouth of yours the way you were meant to,”.

“F- fuck, okay,” you whimpered, and with each snap of his hips, you got louder and louder. Your moans urged him on, his hips rutting into yours with more urgency now, his movements becoming almost primal as he chased the pleasure of feeling you wrapped around him. “God, Joe. You always do it so good, ohhh,”.

Joe’s forehead pressed against yours again, his breaths mixing with yours as he forced into you with a steady, hard pace. The pleasure rapidly builds in your body, only growing stronger with every pump of his large cock. The heat between you was overwhelming, every movement sending shivers coursing through your body. His lips hovered just inches from yours, teasing yet comforting, which reminds you he was right there with you. As his hands caressed your sides in a loving manner that made your heart flutter, he said. “I love you, you know that?”.

“Please, Joe. Don’t stop,” you whimpered, throwing your head to the side as your voice trembled with need; the couch began to creak under you due to the strength of his thrusts. “Joe, don’t stop ever,”.

His hips didn’t stutter even for a split second, his rhythm was perfect and unrelenting. “Listen to me,” he insisted, quickly using his hand to move your face back to his, his tone gentle and commanding. “You know I love you, right?” he asked again, his cock pounding into your heat with more force to punctuate his words.

You gasped when his lips found the sensitive skin of your neck, his teeth grazing before he bit and sucked gently, leaving his mark on you. “O- Oh, Joey,” you moaned, your fingers tangling in his damp hair. “Yeah, y- yeah. I know you love me, baby,”.

“Good,” he rasped, his forehead pressed to yours again as he kept that hypnotic pace. “Because I fucking do. I love you more than anything,”.

“Oh my god, Joe,” you choked, your back arching as he adjusted his angle by cupping the back of your knee and lifting your leg a little, hitting a spot that made your vision blur.

“God damn, baby,” he groaned, his voice strained with pleasure as he felt you open up more than before. “You’re so fucking beautiful, taking me like this. Fuck, I don’t know what I’d do without you,” he said, looking down at his shaft disappearing in and out of your heat, somehow even leaving a little imprint in your lower belly. The sounds filling the room added to the haze, the melodic sound of his cock slapping in and out of your soaked core almost as beautiful as the sounds coming from your lips.

“Joey. Joey. Joe, fuck,” you cried out, your nails digging into his shoulders.“Right there–oh my god, Joe, right there!” you screamed, feeling his cock hitting your g-spot over and over, his tip abusing your cervix in the best possible way.

“Yeah? Right there?” he panted, his breath hot against your skin. “That make you feel good? You like that?” he asked, his next thrust being ever rougher so he could hit the spot again. The sight of your breasts bouncing back and forth from the intensity of his thrusts made his eyes roll back, “Damn,” he grunted under his breath.

“Oh, fuck yeah. Shit,” you whimpered, your body trembling beneath him, your brain completely dark as you lost yourself in his heated touch.

His lips found yours again, silencing your moans as his pace quickened. “You’re my girl,” he whispered against your mouth, his voice filled with confidence. “My special girl. Nobody can hurt you, not as long as I’m by your side,”.

Tears pricked the corners of your eyes, overwhelmed by the intimacy and the way his words wrapped around your heart like a protective shield. And well, also because he usually had a knack for sending you to the verge of tears when he was a little intense with you like this. “I know…I- I know, Joe. I’m your girl,” you whispered, your voice cracking as another wave of pleasure overtook you. “Ah,” you hissed, closing your eyes from the overwhelming amount of pleasure you were feeling.

“That’s right,” he groaned, his hips pressing into you deeper, his pace becoming erratic as he chased his own release. “You’re mine, Y/N. Forever mine,”.

Your eyes met his baby blues, and you felt a warmth behind them that had been missing for weeks. There was a familiar spark between you as if everything else had faded away, leaving just the two of you in this intimate moment. You had finally broken through the barriers he put up. The way he held you now, the way he talked to you now, was different. He was confident, relaxed, and full of raw need.

As his lips met yours in another kiss, the words he spoke were soft, yet they carried the weight of everything he had been holding back. “I need you,” he whispered between kisses, his voice raw with emotion. “P- please don’t ever leave me, I-. I need you, baby,” he said again, his earlier emotions threatening to take over during this heated affair.

“I’m yours,” you breathed out, your brain jumping over what he just said, again. “I’m here for y- you…always, fuck-,”. Your legs moved around him, pulling him closer as the pressure coiled tighter and tighter in your core. Your head fell back against the couch, a loud moan escaping your lips as you trembled beneath him. “God, Joe! F- fuck, I can’t…oh my god,” you moaned, breathy gasps falling from your lips with no end in sight.

Joe didn’t stop, his hips slowing just enough to ride you through your nearing high while he continued murmuring sweet, filthy praises against your skin. “Fuck, baby. You were made for me, made for me to fuck you like this,” he groaned, his cock twitching inside of you as your walls convulsed around him.

You clung to him, your body still shaking as he slowed his movements, his own release edging closer. His lips pressed against your ears, his breath hot and jagged as he whimpered your name over and over. “Let me take care of you,” you murmured, feeling the need to let him know that this wasn’t only about you–hell it wasn’t supposed to be about you. “Let go, Joey. Do what you need to do,”.

Joe’s eyes locked with yours, the intensity in his gaze stealing your breath all over again. With a groan, he pushed forward, capturing your lips in another kiss so deep it left no doubt–he was yours, and you were his. Always.

“Oh, I’m so close,” you whimpered, feeling the band in your belly tighten and your walls start to close in on his thick shaft.

“Fuck…me too, baby,” he whined, picking up the speed of his thrusts while moving a hand down to your bundle of nerves. His fingers fondled your clit expertly, knowing exactly what you liked and how you needed it. And a few seconds later, you felt a wave of pleasure wash over your body. “God, Joe!” you screamed, throwing your head back into the pillows as you arched into him, “Fuck, I’m cumming,” you whimpered.

“Yeah?” he growled, pushing into your snug walls with more force. “You gonna let go for me? You gonna stop thinking about what those fucking idiots said earlier? Ah. You gonna relax for me?” he groaned, his voice strained as he felt himself tip over the edge from the way you were reacting underneath him.

“Y- yeah, I will,” you moaned as your body trembled beneath his sweaty frame, caving at the power of his words. Your adorably scrunched-up nose, your fluttering eyes, your rosy cheeks, and your grip on his shoulders were all enough for him to reach his high. He was the only one to have you like this–so vulnerable and raw. And that thought drove him feral.

“Y/N,” he groaned, his voice thick with pleasure. “Oh, fuck…Y/N,”. With one final, powerful thrust, you felt him come undone, his entire body trembling as he shattered against you. His cock twitched deep inside, flooding your core with his release as he buried his face in the crook of your neck, his teeth clamping down on your shoulder to silence his moans. Your name fell from his lips like a prayer and his arms wrapped tightly around you as if you were the only thing anchoring him to the earth. “God, Y/N…,” he panted, his breath hot against your skin as he pushed himself deeper, making sure every last bit of him filled you.

“Joe,” you whimpered softly, the faint sting below making your voice shake. “Oh m- my god…,” you breathed out, aftershocks of your orgasm washing over you while your eyes adjusted to the room; his arms tightened instinctively around you almost like he could protect you from even the smallest discomfort.

You felt so achingly full–the feeling of his load and softening cock deep inside of you, and his hand sprawled across your stomach making you a little dizzy. His fingertips began tracing slow, soothing patterns along the curve of your hip, his touch bringing you back down to earth.

He lifted his head enough to look at you, his messy hair and lazy eyes looking all too familiar. The corners of his mouth curved into a small, satisfied smile as his baby blue eyes softened. “You wore me out, princess,” he murmured, his voice carrying that delicious, raspy edge you loved so much. “But I don’t think I’ll ever get enough of you,”.

The warmth in his voice was matched by the way he looked at you, his expression a blend of admiration, affection, and a touch of exhaustion.

“Thank you, god,” you thought to yourself.

He pressed a soft kiss to your temple, his lips lingering as if he didn’t want to let the moment slip away. “Are you okay?” he asked gently, concern clear in his voice as his thumb brushed over your cheek. “Was I too rough?”.

You shook your head, your hands sliding up to tangle in his hair. “I’m okay,” you whispered, smiling up at him. “Better than okay,”.

His smile grew, and he leaned down to kiss you again, this time slower, softer, as if he was pouring all the emotions he couldn’t put into words into that single moment. When he pulled back, he tucked a strand of your hair behind your ear, his eyes never leaving yours. “You’re amazing,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “I mean it, Y/N. You’re my everything. I’m so sorry about everything that happened today,”.

The sincerity in his voice and the way he looked at you made your chest swell with love. You reached up, cupping his face in your hands, your thumb brushing over the curve of his jaw. “Hey, we don’t have to talk about that right now. Just relax. I’m here,” you whispered back, your words filled with quiet certainty as you ran your other hand up along his chest and stopped at his heart. “You might be a stubborn ass sometimes,” you began, earning a lazy chuckle from him. “But you’re all mine…you’re my everything. I love you,”.

“I’m still sorry for–,” he began, but you didn’t let him finish. You leaned up, pressing your lips to his in a kiss that cut off his unnecessary apology. It was soft but firm, a clear message that he didn’t need to say anything more. When you pulled back, your eyes met his. Those gentle, puppy dog eyes of yours told him everything you wanted him to know–your forgiveness, your love, and your reassurance–all without a single word. He exhaled deeply, his shoulders relaxing as he gave you a small, grateful smile.

He took the hint—that you didn’t want to talk about this right now—and kept the conversation going. The last thing he wanted to do was press you about this after he had just gotten you to loosen up. “That was a way better workout than running,” he mumbled, dropping his head down to your chest and breathing in your calming scent as his fingers brushed against your belly; tracing little shapes into your plush skin.

You chuckled weakly, the sound barely a breath as your exhaustion caught up to you. “Mm, good…that was the plan,” your eyelids grew heavier, and the soothing rhythm of his heartbeat against your body pulled you closer to the edge of sleep.

“You were extra loud tonight too,” he shamelessly teased, pressing a kiss to your belly. “I liked that,”.

“…You ask and I deliver..,” you replied lazily, fighting back a yawn.

Joe noticed the way your responses slowed, your breathing evening out as you succumbed to the warmth and safety of his embrace. “Hey,” he whispered, “You’re fading on me, aren’t you?”.

“Hmm,” you hummed, feeling yourself fall further into slumber. “Mm, tiredd,” you dragged out, yawing again as you closed your eyes for a few seconds.

“Alright, sleeping beauty,” he murmured, his voice the softest it’d been all night. “Let’s get you to bed, yeah?” he said and moved with such caution as he knew by the look in your eyes that you were exhausted in more ways than one. You stirred a little, nuzzling into his chest as he picked you up in his arms, your body instinctively latching onto the comfort he offered.

Joe carried you through the quiet house, the dim light casting soft shadows across his face. He looked down at you, his lips curving into a fond smile as you whispered something in your sleep. “I love you, Joey,” you mumbled, rubbing your cheek against his chest out of comfort.

“I love you too,” Joe mumbled as he pressed a lingering kiss to your forehead, and as he pulled away to look at you, he felt a tug at his heart. You looked so delicate, so precious in his arms and he couldn’t help but feel guilty for making you act this worried about him. You never showed it, but he knew that you were struggling–that you had been since November. “I’m going to be there for you, Y/N,” he whispered, his voice thick with emotion. “I’m not going to let anyone hurt you. Not again, not ever,”.

When he reached the bedroom, he gently lowered you onto the bed, tucking the covers around you with practiced ease. For a second, he just stood there, watching the way your peaceful face softened in the comfort of your bed. Leaning down, he pressed one last kiss to your forehead. “I’m sorry,” he whispered.

Sliding into bed next to you, Joe wrapped an arm around your waist, pulling you close as he settled in. Even in your sleep, you turned into him, your body naturally finding his warmth. As the quiet night enveloped you both, Joe let out a content sigh, feeling relaxed for the first time all day. Despite the storm raging inside his head, he managed to find shelter in it for you. Now he hoped you could do the same for him, he hoped you could let yourself be open with him. He hoped you’d allow yourself to let him carry some of your weight for once, especially because it was his fault.

You did what you needed to do–distracting him to get his mind off of things and bring him back to his safe space. But getting you to relax was the true thing that made him take a deep breath and loosen up. Seeing you curled up against him, a faint smile on your lips, your arms clinging to him; that’s what made him genuinely let go. You weren’t just his distraction; you were his peace. And for the first time in hours, he felt like everything was going to be okay.

The Next Morning

You stirred gently in your sleep, the light of the morning filtering through the curtains and casting a glow over your bare skin. Your eyes fluttered open, lashes brushing against your cheeks as you adjusted to the faint sunshine which was limited by the clouds. A soft, sleepy whine escaped your lips, the remnants of slumber clinging to you as the day began to break through the haze of your dreams.

You turned your head to the space next to you, your nose brushing against his pillow, filling your nostrils with a clean, subtle musk mixed with the faded remains of his body wash–a warm, woodsy fragrance with hints of cedar and sandalwood. Mixed with that was the specific, earthy scent of his skin with the light saltiness of sweat from last night. It was uniquely him–raw, grounding, and intoxicatingly familiar.

But he wasn’t there.

“Morning meetings,” you sighed, remembering that he had a typical routine to follow and couldn’t just relax in bed all day with you like you wanted him to.

You turned your head back to the ceiling, giving yourself a moment to breathe before slowly sitting up. As you moved, a deep, dull ache spread between your thighs–a lingering memento from the night before. “Ooooh,” you hissed softly, biting your lip and carefully lifting your hips to ease the pressure as you shifted forward. The memory of his intensity made a blush rise to your cheeks, and despite the sting, a playful giggle escaped your lips. “Damn, he really went hard last night,” you murmured to yourself, shaking your head at the thought of Joe's unmatched determination–both on and off the field.

You swung your legs over the edge of the bed and planted your feet on the cool wooden floor. The difference sent a little shiver up your spine, bringing you back to the present as you stretched your arms, feeling your body wake up from its lingering exhaustion. “I’ll see him in a few hours…might as well pull myself together in the meantime,” you nodded, then stood up and slowly walked over to the closet. You grabbed your baby blue robe and carefully slipped it onto your nude body, your eyes glancing at every mark he left on your body last night. From the scattered marks on your neck to the print of his fingers on your hips, they were all beautiful remnants of him.

You smiled at your reflection, the hazy glow of pleasure from the night before still on your face. With a light hum and smile, you grabbed your towel and headed for the bathroom, eager to rinse off and start the day.

As you stepped into the bathroom, your eyes landed on the mirror, and you froze. A cluster of sticky notes was taped to the glass, their colorful squares bright against the surface. Your chest swelled with warmth as you leaned closer to read them, “What’d you do this time,” you mumbled.

Gone for some meetings. Shouldn’t take too long, be back around lunch.

Thanks for last night ;) I love you sooooo much!!

(Sorry if you’re in pain…got a little carried away lol. I left out a bottle of Tylenol and your heating pad for you)

– j.b

Your fingertips brushed over the notes, and a flood of memories came rushing back. The sticky notes reminded you of your first date–the way Joe had taped one to your apartment door. It had simply said: Open the bag below for tonight.

Flashback to LSU – You and Joe’s first date

“I think I’m going to puke,” you said to Emma while you stared at yourself in your vanity mirror as she finished curling your hair.

“Not over that gorgeous dress. Aim for the side,” she laughed, setting the final curl and then using her fingers to separate them.

You felt a blush rise on your cheeks as you looked down at what you were wearing–a special gift from Joe. When you came back to your apartment earlier, there was a neon pink sticky note taped to the door with a silver gift bag at the doorstep. You weren’t expecting anything, so this came to your surprise and when you got closer, the sticky read “Open the bag below for tonight.”. You skeptically opened the bag, only to be met with the best surprise–a beautiful midnight-blue dress with delicate spaghetti straps and a flowy skirt that danced every time you moved. You gasped when you pulled it out of the bag, the soft fabric slipping through your fingers like silk. Another sticky note had been tucked inside the bag, reading, “A beautiful dress for my beautiful girl. Can’t wait to see you tonight :) - j.b”.

“He’s…something else,” you grinned to yourself, holding the dress up against your body and admiring the way it sparkled in the light.

Now, hours later, with Emma skillfully finishing your hair and your makeup just right, you were feeling…well, terrified.

“I’m serious, Em,” you said, twisting in your chair to look at her. “What if I trip in these heels? What if he regrets asking me out? What if I say something stupid, or worse, what if I–,”.

“Stop it.” Emma held her hands up in mock surrender, rolling her eyes. “First of all, you’re not tripping anywhere. Second, Joe Burrow is down-bad obsessed with you, so let’s not even entertain that nonsense. Third, you won’t say anything stupid because you’re charming as hell. Just relax,”.

You bit your lip, a smile tugging at the corners despite your nerves. “...You think he’s…Obsessed? Really?”.

“Uh, yeah. The man went and picked out a gorgeous, sparkly, expensive–did I mention gorgeous–dress for you. And we all know how men do when it comes to picking things out for girls,” she rolled her eyes. “Joe nailed it and you’re only a girl he met only a few weeks ago but he’s out here like he’s shopping for his fiancee or something. Most guys would just go for flowers or chocolate…but a whole dress–which may or may not retail for $150–,”.

“Wait, what?” you gasped, your eyes widening as you looked down at the outfit. The price tag made your heart race because you’d never worn anything this expensive before–never even imagined it.

You’d always wanted to feel this beautiful, to have someone make you feel special, like a rare gem. And Joe, of all people, being the one to do that? It completely caught you off guard. Warmth spread through your chest as you realized just how much he was making you feel worth it. The lengths he was going to make tonight the best night ever was something that stuck out to you. Tonight was your first official date, but you two have had plenty of hangouts, flirty exchanges, facetimes, and hour-long text conversations that it didn’t really feel like something as noteworthy as a first date. But that didn’t mean you couldn’t be a little nervous about it. It was a date with…Joe Burrow of course.

“That’s next-level dedication,” Emma finished, smoothing the skirt of the dress as you stood to admire the full sparkle effect in the mirror. If it was nearly $200, those sparkles better be doing their damn job. “Besides, have you seen the way he looks at you? Either he’s looking at you with severe bedroom eyes or with the most love physically possible…like when we hit up that frat party at Sigma Phi Epsilon last weekend? All of the girls that usually chase after him were there, begging for some form of his attention, but Joe just looked at you. Claire even bumped into him on purpose and spilled her drink on herself to get him to say something to her, but when he saw you with that look in your eyes–the one you get when you feel anxious–he dropped everything to walk straight across the room from his guys and her…to you. Joe was glued to your hip the entire night, constantly checking on you even when you didn’t notice. He was the center of attention at the party—just like any other party—but he didn’t care about anyone except for the girl next to him. Everybody’s watchin’ him, but he’s lookin’ at you. That tiger’s tail is wrapped right around your finger, babe,”.

Your stomach did a backflip as her words registered in your mind, the gentle ache in your heart intensifying at the mention of that party. The party solidified Joe’s uniqueness amongst the guys at LSU. You remembered standing in the middle of the crowded room, clutching a red solo cup filled with cheap, overly sweet alcohol. The music blared, the bass vibrating in your chest like a second heartbeat, while the room spun with too many bodies pressed too close. You became hyper-aware of everything—the way some guys looked at you, their eyes lingering a little too long, making your skin crawl. The overwhelming smell of sweat and spilled drinks. The chaotic energy of laughter and voices meshing together.

It all became too much, too fast. Your breaths quickened, your chest tightening as panic began to creep in. The walls seemed to close in on you, and the laughter around you sounded sharp, almost mocking. You were frozen, not sure of how to calm yourself without drawing even more attention. Your friends were nowhere in sight, likely caught up in their own conversations or flirting with someone in another corner of the house. You felt alone, trapped in a wave of anxiety that threatened to drown you.

And then, like a lifeline thrown into stormy waters, you felt it–a large, warm hand on your shoulder. The touch was firm but gentle, instantly grounding you. It was familiar and comforting, like it carried a silent assurance that everything would be okay.

Turning your head, you saw him. Joe. His kind eyes searched yours with a quiet intensity, his presence breaking through the chaos around you. In that moment, the weight on your chest lifted, the tight knot in your stomach loosening as the panic started to fade away. It was as if, somehow, he had known exactly when you needed him most, and he’d been there to catch you before you fell.

You’d struggled with anxiety for as long as you could remember, and all the guys you’d been with had realized that one way or another. But none of them cared. None of them knew how to help you and it was because they didn’t want to. They didn’t want to deal with the emotional baggage, with the nerves that you brought with you everywhere you went. But Joe? Joe did. He wanted to help you, be there for you, take care of you. He didn’t even ask you how he could help, he just…knew.

He spent the rest of the party by your side, trading your alcohol for a soda, his arm wrapped around your shoulder, his thumb sliding up and down your bare arm, and his attention all on you.

You felt comfortable for the first time all night by his side. Your mind and body were at ease for once, and you didn’t know how to describe the new feeling you felt. It was a feeling you hadn’t experienced before–something warm and magnetic, yet light and giddy all at once.

But did everyone see it–the way that Joe looked at you like you were the only thought on his mind? Did they see how much he cared about you? Was he so obvious about it?

The connection between you felt so electric, almost as rare and whimsical as lightning in a bottle. You didn’t know if you should be terrified of that because the lighting could shatter through the glass and burn you at any given moment. But it could also be something beautiful, something extraordinary. The kind of spark people spend their whole lives searching for.

Even though you’d only known each other for a short amount of time, the time you had spent together made it feel like you’d know each other for a lifetime. He quickly picked up on your little habits, moods, likes, and dislikes—literally everything there was to know about you. You quickly learned who Joe was behind that helmet and jersey he put on every week, who he was behind his hard-shelled demeanor. He let you in without thinking twice, showing you parts of him he had guarded off for a reason. And you did the same. You didn’t know why since normally you’d be hesitant on showing a guy your weaknesses, your most vulnerable aspects, because you thought they would take advantage of them. But Joe never made you feel like he’d do that to you.

“I just hope he feels the same about me. I really really like him and it’s kind of scary because I’ve never felt this strongly about anyone before and I don’t want to mess it up or screw it up or I don’t know, not give the right vibe? I-,” you blabbed before Emma spoke up.

“Y/N. You’re rambling again,” she said, shaking her head with a knowing smile. “Stop getting in your head over this, babe. You are so hot, so smart, sooooo nerdy, so genuine, and you bring out a side of him that everyone says they’ve never seen. You are the entire package. It doesn’t get any better than you for him,”.

Her words made you pause, your mouth opening as if to argue, but the look in her eyes stopped you. It was determined, full of confidence in you even when you didn’t believe in yourself. You let out a nervous laugh, running your hands down the fabric of your dress as you tried to absorb her pep talk. “You really think so?” you asked softly, looking up at her with a hint of doubt.

“I know so,” she said firmly, leaning closer and placing her hands on your shoulders again. “You’re amazing, Y/N. And if he doesn’t already know that–which, spoiler alert, he does–he’s about to find out tonight,”.

“...You’re right,” you nodded, taking a deep breath and giving your reflection one last look. If this was meant to be, how tonight’s date would go will show that. There was no reason to stress over it anymore–you just had to leave it to the universe now. “How do I look?” you asked, quickly changing the subject so that you didn’t get lost in your head even more, your eyes roaming from your delicate bracelets to your dainty necklaces, and finally to the star of the show–your dress.

“Like you’re about to knock him on his ass,” Emma said with a wink.

“I sure hope so,” you muttered under your breath, feeling a butterfly in your stomach at the thought of him seeing you in the dress he had picked out for you. The deep blue of it shimmered under the soft lights, almost like the dress was alive. And if you looked closely, you could swear the color matched the exact shade of his eyes–especially when he was focused, locked in on something that required all his attention, like the shade of his eyes during a football game. The kind of intensity you could never pull your eyes away from.

You couldn’t help but wonder if that was why he chose this dress, if the color reminded him of that fire in his eyes when he was doing or looking at something that mattered to him. The thought made your heart race just a little faster because he always had a way of making you feel like you were the only thing in the world that mattered to him when you were together. His eyes were always the same shade as this dress when he looked at you.

You realized he wasn’t just buying a dress for you. He was buying something that made you feel like you were seen, truly seen by him.

“I know so,” she repeated, her eyes shining with a knowing smile. “Remember, Y/N. He chose you. He decided to ask you out. He chooses you every day, whether it’s spending every free afternoon with you or calling you for hours before he goes to bed. He’s not doing it because he has to; he’s doing it because he wants to. He wants this with you. He wants you,”.

She was right, and you knew that deep down in your heart—the same heart that was slowly having his name carved into it. Joe always had this gentle smile when he looked at you, this way about him that instantly made you feel comfortable. Everything about him screamed comfortable. But he also had this way about him that made you want to forget the rules, to let your hair down in the breeze, to forget about life for just a second, and to savor each moment for what it was. He made you feel alive. Ever since you met him, the world seemed to take on a new energy, like someone had turned up the saturation in your life. Colors looked richer, sounds felt clearer, and every little thing had a kind of magic it hadn’t before. Joe had this effortless way of bringing joy into your life that nobody else had ever done. He made you laugh harder than you ever thought possible, those deep belly laughs that left you breathless and grinning ear to ear. He made you smile longer too, the kind of smile that lingered even when he wasn’t around, sparked by a memory or the very thought of him.

And those butterflies–oh, those butterflies. They were stubborn, fluttering in your chest every time his name crossed your mind. Whether it was the memory of his laugh, the way his hand brushed yours, or the way his voice dipped when he said your name, they never failed to make their presence known. He wasn’t just someone who made you happy; he made you feel everything more deeply. With Joe, the world was brighter, lighter, alive.

Just like this dress.

—

While you were inside your apartment getting ready and feeling those stubborn butterflies all over again, Joe was standing in front of the mirror in Ja’marr’s apartment, adjusting his button-up for what felt like the hundredth time.

“Man, relax,” Ja’marr said, lounging on his bed while tossing a football in the air. “It’s just a date. You acting like you about to propose or something,”.

“Easy for you to say,” Joe muttered, tugging at the sleeves. “She’s...she’s different. This isn’t just any date,”.

Justin, sitting at the desk scrolling through his phone, looked up and grinned. “He’s whipped already and they haven’t even gone out yet. Looks like Joey done got struck by cupid’s arrow,” he teased.

“‘Bout damn time too!” Ja’marr nodded. “I’m tired of this man complaining ‘bout how he don’t got a girl when he sees the couples out and about or someone to build legos with ever since I started hangin’ with Shyla,”.

Joe shot him a glare, but it was half-hearted. He couldn’t deny it–he was whipped. Ever since he’d worked up the courage to ask you out, you’d been all he could think about. He wanted everything to be perfect tonight, down to the smallest detail. “You think she’ll like the dress and flowers?” Joe asked, ignoring Ja’marr’s comments and glancing nervously at the bouquet of carnations and roses sitting on the desk next to the container filled with smarties.

“Boy,” Ja’marr said, catching the football and sitting up. “You nailed it. She’s gonna look amazing in it, and she’s gonna love that you went out of ya way to pick that out from the most expensive store in the mall and the flowers out. Hell, I think she’ll lose it for real once she sees the smarties box,”.

Justin chuckled. “You stressing too much, bro. Just be yourself. You know she already likes you, right?”.

Joe sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I know, but...she’s special. I don’t want to screw this up,”.

“Special, huh?” Ja’marr teased, smirking at Justin as they both thought the same thing. With the way Joe had talked about you to them plus how he was acting right now only made it clear that he was serious serious about you. They couldn’t really place their finger on why since you’d only known each other for a short amount of time, but they weren’t going to question it as long as Joe had that boyish smile and glow on his face, the smile and glow you put on his face.

“Yeah, special,” Joe said firmly, his jaw setting as he turned to face his friends. “She’s not like anyone else I’ve ever met. She’s so smart, adorably funny, so natural, and so damn beautiful, and I don’t want her thinking she made a mistake agreeing to this…'cause well…dating the star quarterback sounds scary as hell. I don’t want her to feel nervous around me because of who I am and what I do,”.

Justin and Ja’marr exchanged a look, their smirks softening into understanding smiles. “Boy quit worrying,” Justin said, standing up and lightly punching Joe on the shoulder. “She seems like a great girl…a lot better than the girls that throw themselves at you. You got this,”.

“Claire,” Ja’marr coughed.

“Just keep your cool? Like how you do during a game. Think of it like that,” Justin added.

Ja’marr nodded, leaning back on his bed. “And if you don’t, well, just let your awkward charm work for you. Girls eat that up,”.

Joe rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the small smile tugging at his lips. “Thanks, guys. Really great advice,”.

“Anytime,” Justin smiled. “Now go pick her up before she thinks you bailed,” he said, turning Joe around to face the door.

But Joe wasn’t done with his nervous ranting just yet. “What if I say something stupid though? I don’t want her to be uncomfortable. Or wait, what if I don’t say the things I should be saying? I really like her and I don’t want to make her feel like I don’t, y’know? Like I want her to know I’m taking this seriously,” Joe rambled, overthinking every detail about tonight. “What if she hates the dress? What if she hates the dinner set up? I-”.

“Joe.” Ja’marr shouted, shooting up from his bed and walking over to his best friend. “Wake the fuck up man? What’s wrong with you?” he questioned. “Why you actin’ like you don’t know how to do this?”.

“I…I don’t know,” he admitted, not sure why he was worrying about tonight. You never gave him a reason to worry, so why was he so scared about messing things up with you? Joe sighed, running a hand through his hair as he paced the length of the room. “It’s just...she’s different, y’know? She’s not like anyone else. I’ve never felt this way about someone before,”.

Ja’marr crossed his arms, leaning against the wall as he watched Joe unravel. “Bro, she already likes you. Hell, she said yes to the date, didn’t she? You’re Joe freakin’ Burrow. Stop psyching yourself out,”.

“But that’s the thing,” Joe argued, stopping mid-step and looking at his friend with a mix of frustration and vulnerability. “I don’t want her to like me just because I’m Joe freakin’ Burrow. I want her to like me, the real me,”.

Justin finally chimed in, a smirk evident on his face. “So show her the real you, man. Don’t overthink it. You’re a good guy, Joe. She already knows that, or she wouldn’t be wasting her time on you,”.

Joe dropped into a chair, his elbows resting on his knees as he hung his head, his stomach doing nervous backflips as if he was getting ready for the biggest game of his entire career. “I just...I really don’t want to screw this up,”.

“Joe, don’t be doing that,” Ja’marr said firmly, patting a hand on Joe’s shoulder. “She’s gonna love the dress, the dinner, all of it. And if she doesn’t, she’s not the one. Just relax, man,”.

Joe let out a shaky laugh, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, okay. Relax. Sure,”.

Justin chuckled, throwing a pillow at him. “For real, though, don’t overthink it. She’s probably over there freaking out just as much as you are,”.

Joe tilted his head, a small smile tugging at his lips as he imagined you running around, freaking out about the date with a tube of mascara in hand and a mirror in the other. “You think so?”.

“Guaranteed,” Ja’marr said with a grin. “She’s probably stressing about the exact same things you are. Don’t underestimate the depths of girl talk. Shyla told me it’s more than just gossip and talking about sex. They always freakin’ out ‘bout something like their nail color or that their period is late or some shit,”.

“What?” Joe twisted his head and questioned, not understanding what Ja’marr was getting at and if the thought of you gossiping about him and sex–the sex you haven’t had yet–was supposed to make him feel better.

“Don’t worry ‘bout it. Now, come on, Romeo. That clock is tickin’, and you got a girl to get. Pull your head up, straighten them shoulders out, take a deep breath, and go get the future Mrs. Burrow,” Ja’marr nodded, his tone half-serious but laced with the usual teasing that always seemed to calm Joe’s nerves.

Joe couldn’t help but chuckle at his friend’s words, the humor breaking through his anxiety just enough to loosen the tightness in his chest. Leave it to Ja’marr to keep him grounded, even when he felt like he was about to jump out of his own skin. “Alright, alright,” Joe said, standing up and rolling his shoulders back like he was about to step onto the field for a game-winning drive. He took a deep breath, letting the tension in his body melt away as he focused on one thing–you. The thought of your smile, the way your eyes lit up when you laughed, and the softness of your voice filled his mind like a relaxer. Those memories were his anchor, steadying him when the nerves threatened to take over. He looked down at the bouquet in one hand and the container of smarties in the other, his lips shifting into a small, almost boyish smile. He couldn’t believe just a few months ago he was thinking he’d never find the right girl, that he’d be alone for the rest of his life and not have someone to share his happiness with. And now here he was, absolutely obsessed with the greatest woman he had ever come across. The one woman who completely rocked his world the moment she walked in.

“Alright,” Joe murmured to himself. With one last deep breath and a few goodbyes, he turned to head out, the flutter of anxious energy in his stomach transforming into a feeling of excitement.

As he walked to his car, Ja’marr’s last words echoed in his mind, making him shake his head with a grin. “Future Mrs. Burrow,” he muttered, the thought simultaneously terrifying and exhilarating.

The time you spent in those few weeks had made it beautifully clear that you were different from the other girls he’d been with. You gave him a feeling that he’d never felt before, a feeling that only comes around once in a person’s lifetime. That feeling you get when you feel like you’ve met the one.

You made him feel that feeling.

Maybe you were the future Mrs. Burrow.

“Only one way to find out,” Joe smiled, staring at the bouquet of flowers he had for you.

—

A little later, after receiving a text from Joe that he was on his way, you were standing by your door and giving yourself a mental pep talk as your heart hammered against your chest. “Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. It’s just Joe. Everything will be fine. You’ve been alone with him plenty of times before. You can do this,” you told yourself, then heard a soft knock on the door which made your heart skip a beat. “Oh god, he’s here. Just don’t throw up or say the wrong words and it’ll be fine…right?”.

You took one final, deep, long breath before you opened the door to find Joe standing there with his arms behind his back, looking effortlessly handsome in a crisp white, long-sleeved button-up and black pants.

“Oh, fuck he looks good,” was your first of many shameful thoughts of the night.

For a moment, neither of you said anything out loud. His eyes scanned you from head to toe before his lips parted. “Wow,” he said, his tone laced with awe, his eyes widening and his stomach fluttering as if he had just come across the most gorgeous thing he’d ever laid his eyes on–which you honestly were. “You l- look...absolutely stunning,”.

“God, she looks even sexier than usual. The blue really brings out her smile and eyes…,” he thought to himself, his eyes landing on your hips, then your chest, lingering for a second too long which made your breath hitch.

Your cheeks flushed so hard you could feel the warmth spread to your ears. “The d- dress really s- suits you,” he said, moving back to your eyes, awkwardly letting the words fall from his lips as he felt his heart palpitate in his chest.

He was stuttering. He was standing here in front of you, stuttering because he couldn’t comprehend how beautiful you looked; his baby blue eyes wider than ever before as he was bouncing back and forth on his feet.

He was nervous.

Joe Burrow was nervous, because of you.

Adorable.

“Thanks to you,” you replied softly, glancing down at the dress he picked out, and brushing the fabric nervously with your fingers. “This dress…it’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. You have great taste, it’s exactly what I like and I love it. Thank you for this, Joey,”.

Joe’s lips curved into a more peaceful smile now that he knew you liked it, one that reached his eyes, and then, as if remembering something, he brought forward one of his hands. Your eyes widened as he brought out a bouquet–your favorite mix of carnations and roses, arranged in a delicate bundle and wrapped in crisp pink paper. “These are for you,” he said, his voice shy.

For a moment, you just stared, your heart swelling in your chest as a wave of emotion threatened to smoosh you. The flowers were perfect, like he’d thought of you with each petal–which he did because he remembered you telling him all about your favorite flowers. From the specific flower shop to the specific flowers, to the colors and combinations, you rambled about it for minutes when you grabbed a post-practice meal with him last week. Even though he was sore, tired, and sleepy, he still listened to you as if you were giving the State of the Union address at the White House; like what you were saying was life-altering important.

You reached out slowly, your fingers brushing his as you took them. “They’re beautiful,” you whispered, feeling your throat tighten. “You’re so sweet, J. I love them,”.

The vulnerability in your voice must have touched his heart directly because his smile deepened, his gaze softening. “They reminded me of you,” he said simply. “Delicate and gorgeous, their beauty shines through each soft petal-like how you effortlessly light up every room you walk into, leaving everyone around you–especially me–in awe,”.

“I-,”.

“Oh, and I have something else for you,” he added, bringing forth his other hand, which held a medium-sized, clear container in it.

Your eyes widened as you peeked inside, “There is no way he-,” you thought, realizing it was filled with unwrapped smarties. “Oh my god,” you gasped out loud. “Joe, did you- did you actually unwrap all of these?”.

He shrugged, a bashful smile tugging at his lips. “You told me how much you hated unwrapping them, so…I figured I’d save you the trouble,”.

Holy shit.

A few nights ago, during a late-night FaceTime call–the kind that only happened when both of you couldn’t sleep–you found yourself rambling about the little things to each other. The conversation had started with a casual “What are you doing?” that spiraled into a deep dive into your love for smarties.

You had told Joe the story with a soft smile on your face, remembering how your brother built the logo of your favorite football team out of the colorful candies for your birthday one year. It was one of your favorite memories, and ever since then, smarties have become your go-to comfort snack. “I love them,” you confessed. “But I hate unwrapping them. It’s so tedious. Like, why do they need to make it that hard to enjoy them?”.

Joe had laughed at the time, shaking his head at how passionate you sounded about something so simple. “I’ll keep that in mind,” he had said with a grin, his face brightened by the glow of his phone screen.

Now, standing in front of you with a container of what looked like more than a hundred pieces of unwrapped smarties, Joe Burrow was proving once again that he paid attention to everything you said.

Your heart swelled, and you couldn’t stop the wide grin spreading across your face. “Joe Burrow, you are ridiculous,” you said, but your tone was soft, full of affection.

“I’m resourceful,” he corrected with a nod, his smile turning playful. “And besides, you deserve to have your smarties stress-free, even if it might have taken me a few hours to make sure of it,”.

You laughed, reaching out to touch his arm. “This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. You really know how to make a girl feel special,”.

His grin softened as he looked down at you, his blue eyes glowing in the evening light. “You’re worth it,” he said simply, the seriousness in his tone making your chest tighten with a giddy feeling.

You clutched the flowers and smarties to your chest, feeling the weight of his thoughtfulness settle over you. What he did was such a simple thing, yet the way it made you feel was as if he pronounced his love for you in front of the entire state of Louisiana. But that’s just it, Joe had a way of making the smallest, sincerest, gestures feel like some of the biggest deals ever. He listened to the little things, that’s what made him so special.

“Okay,” you said with a soft smile. “Now you’re just showing off,” you said, referring to how easily he got you to this point–giggly, shy, and oh so soft.

He smirked, his confidence returning. “Is it working?”.

“Oh my god, he’s perfect,” you thought to yourself, feeling the urge to skip to the end of the movie that was your life, jump into his arms, and run off into the sunset with him. He was so good at sweet-talking, he made it seem so…easy? He never made it feel forced or like he had to say those things–which again, separated him from every other guy you’d been with. All the other guys made saying these little compliments, sweet nothings, feel like a monotonous chore. But with Joe, it wasn’t like that at all. It couldn’t be with the way those things easily and constantly slipped from his mouth.

Before you could respond, a voice cut through the flirty moment. “Oh, for god’s sake, Lover boy,” Emma laughed from behind you, leaning casually against the kitchen counter with her arms crossed and an exaggerated smirk. “How much longer are you going to stare at her like that? You’ll make her blush right out of that dress,”.

“Emma!” you hissed, spinning around with a glare.

She shrugged innocently. “What? I’m just saying,” while popping a bite of a brownie in her mouth. “Just…don’t get her pregnant, okay? I don’t want to babysit like ever,”.

Your mouth dropped open in sheer mortification, and your face burned so hot you thought you might combust on the spot. Behind you, Joe let out a low chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck with a sheepish grin as he tried not to laugh too hard. “Emma!” you snapped, your voice strangled as you clutched the flowers tighter.

“I’m serious,” she laughed. “You were going on and onnn earlier about how you think he’s the hottest man you’d ever seen, how you just want to pull on his soft hair and want him to throw you aroun–,”.

“Emma Lynn!” you screamed in mortification, shutting her down before she could finish what she was saying, Joe’s cheeks turning red as you whined in embarrassment. He did not need to know what went on during girl talk earlier, especially because the things that you said were so…fueled by hormones.

But you couldn’t really help it? He was seriously the hottest man you’d ever come across. His soft, adorable, gentle nature went so well with his stoic, hard-headed, sometimes cocky, always sexy, character. When you got a mixture of both his sides, you were right on your knees in front of him. The things you wanted him to do to you would quite literally set feminism back by a few hundred years.

“I’m just teasing,” she lied, giving you a wink as she pushed off the counter. “But seriously, nice flowers, Joe. Maybe you can teach other guys how to not be so clueless,”.

“Emma, go away!” you glared, feeling incredibly embarrassed by your friend’s teasing.

She raised her hands in mock surrender, walking towards your bathroom with a smug grin. “Alrighttttttt. You two have fun…but not too much fun,” she said over her shoulder before disappearing down the hall.

You turned back to Joe, groaning as you covered your face with one hand. “I’m so sorry about her,” you mumbled, peeking at him through your fingers. But Joe didn’t seem flustered. If anything, his smile grew more relaxed, his boyish charm shining through. “It’s okay,” he said, his voice warm and teasing. “She’s...protective, I guess?”.

“More like annoying,” you muttered, shaking your head.

“Hey, I don’t mind,” he said with a soft laugh. “It’s nice to know you’ve got people looking out for you. Even if they’re a little...direct about it,”.

You couldn’t help but laugh, lowering your head. “Yeah, direct is one way to put it,”.

Joe laughed as he held out his hand, the hand that was always so steady and sure; whether it was gripping a football or your hand, his grip was firm, like he knew exactly what he was going to do at all times. “You ready?” he asked, his deep blue eyes meeting yours, searching for the answer he already seemed to know.

For a moment, everything around you felt different. The air seemed lighter, almost like a soft breeze had wrapped around you both and put you in your own safe cocoon. The sky shifted from baby blue to lilac and orange; you couldn’t tell if it was real or just your imagination.

Looking at him, clutching the flowers and candy he gave you, a strong feeling rushed through you, one so deep it almost knocked you over. You’d only known Joe for a few weeks, but it felt like longer, like he’d been part of your life forever. There was something about him–a pull, magnetic and impossible to resist–that made you want to stay close, to let him hold you and never let go.

He gave your hand three gentle squeezes, a small gesture that felt like so much more. You could tell it meant something more, but you didn’t overthink it. It was too soon for that, or at least that’s what your brain said. Right now, all that mattered was him and this special moment.

“Ready,” you smiled, feeling that pull between you tighten once the word left your lips.

If it was too soon for that then why did it feel like you were saying “ready” for something so much more? This wasn’t a lifelong vow, just a first date. But the significance of the moment hung in the air and it was hard to ignore. Maybe it was the way Joe looked at you, his eyes filled with something you couldn’t quite put into words. Maybe it was the way the dress hugged your body in all the right places, making you feel effortlessly beautiful, or how the soft floral scent of the bouquet in your hands seemed to cast a spell around you, clouding your thoughts and focusing them only on him. Or maybe it was because Joe felt different. A kind of different that wasn’t just exciting–it was safe and grounding but also made you feel exposed in the best way; like he already understood parts of you you hadn’t shared yet. This didn’t feel like just a first date. It felt like the beginning of something bigger, something important.

Joe must have sensed it too. As he led you out the door, his hand never leaving yours, his pace was slow, unhurried. He looked at you often, his eyes full of stars, like he was etching this moment into memory. It was as if this wasn’t just a step into the night, but a step toward fulfilling something inevitable. Something written in the stars.

Neither of you said much on the short walk to his car, but his actions spoke volumes. There was a naturality in the way Joe moved around you, a quiet attentiveness that felt so...gentlemanly. When he opened the car door for you, his hand found the small of your back, keeping you steady as you slid into the seat. His touch lingered just a second longer than necessary, sending a shiver up your spine that had nothing to do with the cool evening air. As he walked to the driver’s side, you adjusted in your seat, and you couldn’t help but notice how the tension seemed to grow between you both, turning electric by the second. He didn’t start the car right away, though. Instead, his eyes moved toward you as he waited for you to settle in, like even the small act of buckling your seatbelt deserved his undivided attention.

Then, with the same quiet thoughtfulness that had your heart doing little flips, he reached out and turned the air conditioner down without a word. It was such a small thing, but it made you pause.

He remembered.

He remembered how you’d shivered after one of his games a few weeks ago, and how you’d mentioned, half-jokingly, that you were always cold. That night, he placed his sweatshirt over your shoulders without hesitation–a gesture so casual but so thoughtful it left you floored. He still hadn’t asked for it back, which was great because you wore it to bed almost every night now–which he didn’t need to know.

You bit your lip to hide the smile creeping onto your face. The fact that he remembered such a tiny detail about you–a throwaway comment from weeks ago–made your heart soar. It wasn’t just the grand gestures, like tonight’s date, but these quiet, understated moments that made you feel seen in a way you never had before.

A few minutes later, the soft tune of Eventually by Tame Impala played through the car, filling the quiet space. Joe tapped his fingers lightly on the top of the steering wheel, humming along with the song. The streetlights outside cast a soft glow on his face, showing the sharpness of his jawline and the calm look in his eyes.

But the lights didn’t just light up the road—they brought your emotions into focus, the ones you’d been trying to push down. You couldn’t stop yourself from wondering, were you ready for this? For him?

You looked over at him. He looked so sure, so steady, and it pulled at something deep inside your chest. Joe wasn’t just another guy. He was someone who could change everything, someone you could fall for completely. It was scary, but at the same time, it felt like there was no turning back. Not now, not with him. He knew what he wanted, now the ball was in your court.

Being with Joe meant a lot of things: stepping into the spotlight, taking on the role of a quarterback’s girlfriend, and accepting all the emotional ups and downs that came with being with someone chasing a dream as big as the NFL. It meant being recognized by strangers, whispered about in stands and dining halls, and analyzed by people who didn’t even know your last name. It meant late nights comforting him after tough games, early morning pep talks before practices, and balancing your life with the whirlwind of his.

Were you ready for all that?

And as if on cue, you felt Joe’s soft hand slowly reach over and rest gently on your knee. His touch was soft, but the weight of it felt like an anchor, grounding you in this quiet moment almost as if he knew you were hesitating about this. His thumb moved in slow, deliberate circles over your knee, a simple gesture that sent a comforting warmth spreading through your body. Each soft stroke felt like a promise, an implicit connection that went beyond words.

And then, you realized being with Joe also meant so much more. It meant laughter that made your cheeks hurt, quiet moments where it felt like the world disappeared, and a kind of love that left you breathless. It meant being someone he could count on when the pressure felt too heavy, and knowing he’d do the same for you without hesitation. It meant being part of his journey–not just as a supportive figure, but as someone he genuinely wanted by his side through it all; someone who he wanted to share his world with.

Your breath hitched slightly when you felt him give you a squeeze. It was the subtle way he made you feel seen and cared for. It was more than just his hand on your thigh. It was his entire presence, so calm and collected, wrapping around you like a safe hug.

Joe felt safe. You hadn’t felt that kind of feeling in any of your previous relationships, until him. But while he felt safe, he and his world also felt risky. He could leave you heartbroken, shattered beyond repair in the blink of an eye, but he could also make you experience life in a way you would’ve never imagined, show you a love that you thought only existed in the fairytales. Yes, he was a risk, but he was the risk you were willing to take. He was a safe risk.

And that’s when you realized, without a doubt, that you were ready for this. Ready for him. For all the uncertainties, for the unknowns of what might come next. You were ready for Joe, for whatever this was, wherever it was going.

You were ready for it because it felt right.

Like all the stars aligned perfectly for the first time in your life.

And that was something so hard to ignore.

You looked back up at his face, and this time, his eyes caught yours. “You okay?” he asked, flashing you that gentle, loving smile you had become obsessed with.

You nodded, “Better than okay, Joey,” while placing your hand over his, picking it up, and pressing your lips to his knuckles–an action that sent butterflies through his body.

—

The soft glow of the candles reflected off the white tablecloth as you walked into the private dining room at Sogno d’Innamorati. The room was intimate and warm, with delicate floral arrangements decorating the small table set perfectly for two. He had rented out the room just for your date, wanting to spend time with you alone and away from any interruptions or distractions. You couldn't remember the last time a guy went this big for the first date, so either Joe was trying to impress you or this was just how he was–intimate and private.

“He really went all out,” you thought to yourself as Joe guided you inside with his warm touch on the small of your back. A glimpse at the restaurant name on the menu made you tilt your head in curiosity, you wondered what it could have meant.

“This is so beautiful,” you murmured, turning to him with a soft smile. “Sogno d’Innamorati…What does that mean?”.

Joe hesitated for the shortest second, his eyes flickering to you as he rubbed the back of his neck. Then, with a small, slightly bashful grin, he said, “Lover’s dream,”.

You felt your cheeks heat up because of the way he said it, so raspy and almost…shy, sending a shiver through your body. “Lover’s dream?” you repeated softly, a timid smile forming on your face.

He nodded, his eyes locked in on yours for a second longer than intended, “Yeah,” he said, then looking down briefly. “Thought it might be a fitting place for our first date. I heard the food is phenomenal and I thought you might like the vibe, ya know? It’s romantic and warm,”.

You once again tried to fight back the urge to jump in his arms, but it was getting more and more difficult because he was quite literally sweeping you off your feet with every little thing tonight. “Joe, that’s…that’s so sweet,” you said, nervously glancing from the table to him. “You really went all out for this date…thank you. I love all of it,” you smiled, your facial muscles straining from the amount of times you’d smiled at him in the past hour.

“God, she’s a lover’s dream,” he thought to himself as he got lost in your eyes–the eyes that had a look in them that seemed like they’d love him for a lifetime. He snapped out of the daze and then led you to your chair, replaying the way your face lit up when you walked into the room over and over again because of how happy you looked.

—

The atmosphere felt light and dreamy, yet tinted with unspoken nervous energy. Joe was being his usual polite and attentive self, pulling out your chair and making sure you were comfortable. But you could tell he was fidgety in the smallest ways–the little adjustments to his cuffs, the quick flick of his fingers over the edge of his wine glass, the fidgeting with his napkin, and his nervous glancing from the menu to your face that he thought you didn’t notice.

It was absolutely adorable how someone like him could be so nervous around someone like you.

At first, you both sat across from each other, the classy arrangement of the table separating you. The flowers he’d brought earlier sat between you now, their soft scent mingling with the smell of freshly baked bread and wine. The conversation between you flowed easily, despite the jittery undertone that made you both laugh at yourselves every now and then.

Joe leaned back in his chair, still fidgeting with the edge of his napkin, a slight chuckle escaping his lips. “So, uh...what’s your favorite part of this whole...dinner thing so far?” he asked, clearly overthinking his question the second it left his mouth.

You raised an eyebrow, a playful grin tugging at your lips. “The whole dinner thing? You mean this?” you gestured to the dimly lit room, the elegant table, and the soft music playing in the background. “I don’t know, I guess...the company?”.

Joe’s face brightened as he realized you were teasing him. “Right, right. The company is, uh, definitely...the best part,”.

You leaned in a little, lowering your voice in mock seriousness. “I’m glad you agree. But I do have to say, the wine is pretty close behind,”.

Joe laughed, his nerves melting a little. “Yeah, wine’s great. I just–,” he paused, glancing down at his hands for a moment, before looking back up at you. “I don’t know, I just don’t want to...I want to make sure you’re having a good time, y’know?”.

Your heart melted a little at his softness and shyness, “He’s still nervous. Aw, Joey,” you thought before you spoke up. “Joe, I’m having a great time. Seriously. You don’t need to worry about me,”.

“I mean,” he continued, rubbing the back of his neck, “I’ve never exactly... done the fancy dinner thing. It’s not... uh...not really my style but I wanted something like this for you,”.

“Oh, I can tell,” you grinned, teasing him again. “The way you looked at the different forks next to your plate earlier told me everything, but you’re pulling it off pretty well. I’ll give you an A for effort,”.

Joe snorted, clearly relieved that you picked up on his vibe. “Okay, well, A for effort, but not, like, a solid A+?”.

You giggled, giving him a playful side eye. “I mean...maybe if you added a little more charm,”.

He leaned forward in shock. “Charm?,” he dramatically gasped, “You mean I’m not charming enough already?”.

You pretended to think about it for a moment, tapping your chin dramatically. “Well, I think you're getting there. But, I might need a few more minutes to decide,”.

Joe let out a dramatic sigh, putting his hand over his heart. “Well, now I’m just heartbroken. I thought I was acing it,”.

“Like I said, keep up with the charm and maybe my answer will change,” you winked, raising your wine glass to take a sip.

—

After a while, Joe started shifting in his seat, leaning forward as if the space between you was unbearable. You watched him stand up, and your eyebrows rose in confusion. “What are you doing?” you asked, laughing nervously because you weren’t sure if you said something or did something to make him abruptly get up.

“I don’t like this,” he said simply, shaking his head in disapproval.

You felt your heart stop, your stomach churn, and the room catch on fire all within the span of a few seconds. “Oh, it’s over. I fucked up. I ruined the date and he doesn’t want this anymore,” you thought, feeling a wave of nausea come over you as you stared at Joe. You had a knack for jumping to conclusions in moments like these, which is why when you saw him pick up his chair, walk around the table, and place it next to yours, you froze.

Oh.

When he sat back down, he smiled, looking much more at peace and genuinely comfortable. “Better,” he murmured, casually draping his arm over the back of your chair, his body warmth immediately enveloping you.

You felt his fingers softly grazing your shoulder, each touch giving your heart the much-needed shocks to start back up again. You didn’t have to do that, you know,” you said, teasing but secretly loving how close he was and how he physically couldn’t be that far away from you.

“I wanted to,” he said matter-of-factly, his blue eyes sparkling. “Wanted to be close to you,”.

You felt his lips press against your temple in a tender kiss, his hand continuing to rub gentle circles on your bare shoulder. The softness of the gesture and the way he let out a quiet laugh–like he was still a little nervous–made you smile.

“Can’t stay away from me, Burrow?” you teased, leaning into his body a little more.

“Nope,” he admitted, smiling against your forehead. “You’ve got me wrapped around your pretty little finger, lovey,”.

Lovey?

The nickname dangled in the air like a soft melody, and you froze for a moment. It wasn’t the nickname itself but the way he said it–so natural, so affectionate, like it had always been yours.

Your head tilted up to look at him, your eyes wide. “Lovey?” you repeated, your voice barely above a whisper.

Joe’s cheeks flushed, his confident smile stuttering for just a second before he shrugged, playing it cool. “Yeah,” he said, his voice a little softer now. “It just…fits, doesn’t it?”.

You blinked at him, the surprise thawing into something warmer, something deeper. “You really just came up with that, didn’t you?”.

He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. “Maybe. But it feels right,”.

The way his eyes met yours, so sincere and steady, made your heart skip a beat. “Lovey,” you repeated again, this time with a soft smile pulling at your lips. “I kind of…love it,”.

Joe grinned, that boyish, lopsided grin that made you feel like you were the only person in the world. “Good,” he said, pulling you a little closer. “Because I’m not taking it back,”.

You laughed, your cheeks warm as you leaned into him again. “You’re such a softie, Burrow. Who would’ve guessed that the stone-cold LSU quarterback was such a sappy, lover boy deep down?”. But…I like it. I like you like this,”.

“Guess I just needed the right person to bring out that side to me, lovey,” he winked.

Your heart fluttered at the way he said it again, and you knew right then and there that you’d never get tired of hearing that nickname–or the way he made you feel like you were his entire world.

—

The mood shifted as the main courses arrived and the yummy smell of Italian cuisine filled the air. Everything was flowing so easily between you two, and at one point, you caught him staring at you a little longer than usual. “What?” you asked, feeling a little nervous but excited by the way he was looking at you.

“Sei così bella in questa luce,” he said with a smirk, his voice soft and warm.

You blinked at him, your lips parting slightly in surprise. “Wait. What?”.

He cleared his throat, a sheepish grin tugging at his lips. “It means…you look so beautiful in this light,”.

“Oh my god,” you thought to yourself, “He fucking knows Italian? Is he real?”.

Your heart skipped a beat as your hand instinctively rose to your cheek. “Joe Burrow,” you whispered, your voice laced with surprise and a touch of shyness. “You know Italian?” you asked while shaking your head in disbelief. What did this man not know?

“A little bit,” he shrugged, though the twinkle in his eyes told you he was lying. He’d actually memorized a few one-liners for you tonight, hoping to add to the vibe and impress you.

“Hmmm..Really?” you teased.

He smirked again, leaning back as he tried to keep his cool, “Mi piace sentire il suono della tua risata,” he said, his voice smoother than silk.

You tilted your head, your curiosity piqued as you raised your eyebrow at him. “And what does that mean?”.

“I love hearing the sound of your laugh,” he translated, his excited eyes never leaving yours.

You couldn’t help but laugh softly, the sound making his lips curve into a bigger smile. “Anything else you’ve got up your sleeve?” you asked, leaning forward slightly.

His smirk deepened as he leaned in, his voice a husky whisper. “Sei incredibilmente bella con questo vestito e mi fai sudare,”.

The words sounded impossibly romantic in his deep, husky voice, but the way his cheeks turned pink after saying it made you suspicious. “Okay, now I need to know what that means,” you said, your grin widening.

“It means…you look insanely gorgeous in this dress, and it’s making me sweat,” he admitted, his bashful tone contrasting with the boldness of the words.

You burst out laughing, your head tipping back as you giggle, “You are unbelievable,”.

“Is it working, though?” he asked, his grin turning boyish as he rubbed the back of his neck.

“Oh, absolutely. You’re smooth as hell, Burrow,” you grinned.

“I mean, I’m being serious, Y/N,” Joe said, the tone of his voice and look in his eyes shifting to something more intense. "You look...really good,".

There was something about the way he looked at you, like he was seeing you for the first time again, but in a way that made you feel seen in all the right ways. “Is that so?” you smirked, leaning back in your chair, pretending to be casual, but the heat flooding your cheeks gave you away. “What exactly about this...look is doing it for you?”.

Joe let out a low laugh, his fingers tapping rhythmically on the edge of his wine glass as his eyes flickered between your lips and your eyes. “Honestly? Everything. The way that dress fits you? It’s like you were made to wear it. It’s...dangerous how good you look,” he said, his eyes roaming your body so incredibly slowly.

You could feel the tension rising between you, like a spark that kept threatening to catch fire. “Dangerous, huh?” You raised an eyebrow, the playful tone in your voice just barely hiding the way your body was reacting to his words. “Careful, Joe. You keep talking like that, and I might just make you regret it,”.

Joe's eyes darkened in an instant, his gaze dropping to your lips before flicking back up to meet yours. “I don’t think I’d regret a single thing about tonight, Y/N,” he said, his voice a low growl, the flirtation clear in his tone.

A rush of heat spread through you, pooling low in your stomach as you felt the tension spark between you like static. You couldn't help but bite your lip, the pull between you two undeniable. “Mmm, well,” you said, voice just barely above a whisper, “Maybe I should keep you guessing. Who knows? You might find out if there’s something worth regretting,”.

Joe chuckled, a deep, throaty sound that made your heart flutter. “Trust me,” he said, his voice dropping even lower, “You’ve got me exactly where you want me. No regrets tonight from me,".

For a second, the world around you faded away. There was nothing but the soft music in the background and the quiet hum of the restaurant, yet it felt like the two of you were in your own little bubble, the air thick with something you were both thinking, but not daring to say. The way his eyes were latched onto yours made it impossible to ignore the heat radiating between you, his confidence and attraction to you only adding to the feeling.

“So,” you said, breaking the tension with a flirtatious tilt of your head, “You think you can handle me?"

“I’m not sure I can handle you,” he murmured, his lips twitching as he felt his heart rate increase. “But god, I want to try,”.

The words hit you like a spark, igniting something inside you that had been building ever since you first locked eyes tonight. “Well," you said, voice thick with lust, “If you’re up for the challenge…,” you trailed off, letting the words linger in the air between you. The teasing smile never left your lips, but you could tell by the way Joe’s breath caught that he was feeling the same thing.

He leaned in a little closer, his thumb brushing against your knuckles before looking at you, “Oh, I’m definitely up for it,” he said, now leaning in closer to your lips, his hot breath hitting them like a rush of hot air on a cold, icy day.

But before either of you could close the gap between your lips, the sound of the door creaking open shattered the moment. A few servers entered, carrying more dishes and breaking the intense silence with the clatter of dishes. You both blinked, suddenly extracted from the magnetic pull between you.

You couldn’t help but laugh at the timing, a soft giggle escaping your lips as you reached out, giving his thigh a playful tap. “Saved by the food,” you said, grinning at the adorable pout forming on his lips. His brows furrowed in mock frustration, but there was a twinkle in his eye that told you he wasn’t truly disappointed.

“Guess I’ll have to wait a little longer,” Joe teased, leaning back in his chair, his lips curling into a sly smile. But you could still see the heat in his eyes, the way his body was still subtly leaning toward you as if he were counting down the seconds until he could pick up where you left off.

“I adore your patience, Quarterback," you teased, unable to hide the smirk tugging at your lips.

“All for you, babe,” Joe murmured, another spark of electricity being sent to your heart when you felt his hand squeeze your bare thigh. But as the servers set down the dishes in front of you, the tension between you both simmered just beneath the surface. You both knew it wasn’t over–not by a long shot.

—

The heated tension between you settled for a little as the two of you continued eating and chatting from everything to football to embarrassing stories from your childhood. As you got to know more about him, it was clear that Joe was just like any other guy. He may have been the star of LSU, but right now, he was just Joe. He didn’t make you feel like you were talking to the most sought out man in Louisiana, he made you feel like you were talking to him. No extra status, no other titles, just simply Joe.

You leaned into Joe’s side, feeling his steady arm around your shoulders as you giggled at your own antics. “I can’t believe you did that,” Joe chuckled, shaking his head after you’d told him about a poor attempt to be a magician that ended in spilled juice, a ruined rug, and one very upset parent.

“I was seven, Joe! And in my defense, the rabbit just wouldn’t cooperate,” you said, pouting slightly.

“Sure,” he teased, his lips turning into that charming half-smile you adored. “And what about the juice? Did it jump out of your hand, too?”.

“Whatever,” you said, trying to sound annoyed, but the laughter in your voice gave you away.

“Your turn. What’s the most embarrassing thing little Joey B did?”.

Joe groaned, his head falling back dramatically as he laughed. “Oh, man. There’s one that my parents never let me live down,”.

“Oh, this is going to be good,” you said, your eyes lighting up with excitement.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, the corner of his eyes crinkling from happiness. “Okay, so I was maybe two or three, and we went to this pumpkin patch for Halloween. I guess I got a little too excited about one of the pumpkins,”.

“Too excited?” you asked.

He nodded, biting his lip to keep from laughing at his own story. “Yeah. I saw this big, hollowed-out pumpkin they were using as decoration, and for some reason, my brilliant little brain thought it was a great idea to crawl inside,”.

Your jaw dropped, and then you burst out laughing. “Wait, inside? Like all the way?”

“All the way,” Joe admitted, grinning sheepishly. “And then I got stuck. Like, really stuck. They had to tip the pumpkin over and basically pull me out by my feet,”.

You gasped, doubling over with laughter, your hand clutching your stomach. “Joe! Oh my god! That’s the cutest thing I’ve ever heard. Little pumpkin Joe,”.

“I know, I know,” he said, his laughter mixing with yours. “My parents even took a picture. I had pumpkin guts in my hair and everything. They still show it off every Thanksgiving…specifically when I try to take a bite of Pumpkin Pie,”.

“That is adorable,” you said, leaning into him and looking up at him with a fond smile. “You were a tiny little pumpkin burglar. I bet you were the cutest kid,”.

Joe laughed, his eyes crinkling at the corners as he looked down at you. “I don’t know about that...but I was definitely a little menace,”.

“Well, now I need to see that picture,” you teased, poking his side gently.

“Not a chance,” he said, shaking his head, though his smile was soft.

“C’mon,” you pleaded, giving him your best puppy-dog eyes.

“Maybe,” he conceded, laughing when you lit up triumphantly. “But only if you promise not to bring it up every time we see a pumpkin,”.

“No promises,” you teased, leaning up to kiss his cheek, sending a shiver down his spine. “Pumpkin Burglar. It has a nice ring to it,”.

He groaned, but the grin on his face told you he secretly loved how much joy the story had brought you. “Well, Ms. Houdini, I’ll have you know that Pumpkin, especially Pumpkin Pie, is my favorite thing ever. So yeah, I guess I am a Pumpkin Burglar,”.

“And I guess that makes me Ms. Houdini,” you said with a playful shrug.

Joe chuckled, leaning back slightly with an amused twinkle in his eyes. “Oh, you mean with your failed magic trick attempt? At least I made it into the pumpkin,”.

“Hey,” you opposed, narrowing your eyes at him. “I might have bombed that one, but I think the trick I’m pulling off right now is going pretty well,”.

“Oh?” he asked, raising an eyebrow, his smile widening. “And what magic trick is that, Ms. Houdini?”.

You leaned in just a little, your confidence strengthened by the way he was looking at you, his attention completely yours. “Making you fall for me,” you said, your voice light but teasing, a wink punctuating your words.

Joe blinked, clearly caught off guard by your boldness, before a slow grin spread across his face. “Oh, is that what this is?” he said, his tone dropping just a little, a hint of something deeper laced through his words.

You tilted your head, matching his energy. “Is it working?”

He didn’t answer instantly, his gaze dropping to your lips for a split second before meeting your eyes again. “Yes,” he admitted boldly.

A laugh left your lips before you looked at him again, “Good,” you whispered.

“What happens when the trick’s over?” he asked, his voice low, teasing but with an edge of seriousness. He was enjoying his night with you, but he couldn’t help but wonder what would happen when it ended, what would happen if the trick ended.

“Who says it ever ends?” you shot back, a small smirk tugging at your lips as you grabbed his hand and intertwined your fingers with his, assuring him with your touch that you were not going anywhere.

—

A little later, as you continued sharing stories and talking until your mouths went numb, the soft tune of “Look After You” by The Fray started to fill the cozy private dining room, adding to the intimate atmosphere Joe had so carefully curated. His leg bounced nervously under the table, his fingers tapping against his thigh as the song played in the back.

He had spent way too long thinking over the song choices when the restaurant manager asked for recommendations. Most of his picks were safe, but something had compelled him to throw this one into the mix. Now that he was actually hearing it play, he wasn’t sure if it was too much. Would you think it was too forward? Was it too soon?

It’s not like the song was exactly…casual.

Joe was lost in his own thoughts, nearly missing the way your eyes lit up as the lyrics caught your attention.

“Oh, oh, Be my baby, Oh, oh. It's always have and never hold, You've begun to feel like home yeah, What's mine is yours to leave or take, What's mine is yours to make your own,”.

“Oh my god,” you said softly, a nostalgic smile forming on your face, “I love this song,”.

Joe froze for a second, his eyes darting to yours, “You do?” he asked, clearly nervous by the way his voice was slightly trembling.

You nodded as you leaned closer, “Yeah, it’s one of my favorites. It’s so…romantic,”.

The tension dissolved from his shoulders as he leaned back in his chair, a shy grin pulling at his lips. “I thought it might be a little, uh…on the nose,” he admitted.

You laughed softly, reaching out to rest your hand on his arm. “It’s perfect, Joey,” you assured him, your touch grounding him in a way that words couldn’t. “All the songs that you played were so perfect,”.

“Even Mine by Taylor Swift?” he asked, raising a brow as a playful smile tugged at the corner of his lips. The song had played earlier, and now that he thought about it, it might’ve been a little too on the nose. He looked at you, genuinely curious.

Without hesitation, you boldly replied, “Mhm. You know why? Because you are the best thing that’s ever been mine,”. Your words were confident, but your heart raced as the weight of what you’d just said settled over you. A small part of you worried–was it too soon? Too much?

But Joe didn’t seem fazed at all. In fact, his eyes softened, his expression contemplative. “Mine,” he murmured under his breath, as if he was testing the word, letting it roll off his tongue with a certain ease. The way he said it sent a shiver down your spine.

He didn’t just like the sound of it. He wanted it. He wanted you to be his–completely, fully, undeniably his. He didn’t want to share your smiles, your laughs, your love with anyone else. That word, simple as it was, held so much meaning to him.

It was only a matter of time before the two of you had that conversation. The feelings you shared were too strong to ignore, and the connection between you was so obvious that anyone nearby could feel the pull. All that was left now was for you both to be brave enough to face it, to acknowledge the love that had quietly woven itself into your hearts.

—

As the night went on, the feeling didn’t waver, it only got stronger, maybe even louder. It was the gestures, the little things he did that made you fall even harder for him, like he was all yours and was doing this just for you.

He poured your water before you even noticed your glass was half-empty. Whenever you were talking, he gave you all his attention, his eyes glued to yours, his face tilted to you, and his arm resting around your shoulder. And the entire time you were at dinner, he never looked at his phone. He asked if you were cold, if you needed some fresh air, if you needed to use the bathroom. When you moved in your seat, he asked if you were comfortable, adjusting the chair slightly for you. “Good?” he asked, his voice so sweet it made your cheeks hotter than the sun.

“Perfect,” you replied softly, resting your head against his shoulder for just a moment, this movement making his heart skip a beat. “You’re such a gentleman, Joe Burrow,” you mumbled, smiling like a madman into his chest.

“And you deserve nothing less,” he said under his breath before he glanced down at you, his lips curling into a small smile at the sight of how peaceful, how natural you fit next to his body. “You okay?”.

“Yeah,” you whispered, looking up at him. “Just…very comfortable,”.

It wasn’t long before you placed a soft, warm kiss against his neck, the warmth of your lips making him stiffen for a moment before relaxing into your touch. His hand, which had been resting on your shoulder, slid down to hold your hand, his thumb grazing the back of it. When you ran your hand lightly along his thigh, you felt his muscles tense, and a low laugh rumbled from his chest. “Careful,” he murmured, though the slight hitch in his breath betrayed him.

You weren’t usually this touchy feely–not on a first date. Neither was he. But something about tonight felt different. There was an enchanting, magical pull between you, a sense of comfort that got rid of any awkwardness. Neither of you could deny that the spark between you was just seconds away from fully catching on fire.

Joe pressed another kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering this time. “You feel different,” he murmured, almost to himself.

“What do you mean?” you asked, lifting your head to meet his gaze.

“Just…better. Like this is supposed to be happening,” he said, his blue eyes soft as they searched yours. “Like this is exactly where I’m supposed to be. Here, with you. Doing this with you,”.

Your chest tightened at his words, a warmth blossoming in your heart. You felt it too–that same inexplicable connection. You leaned into him again, your head on his shoulder, and sighed contentedly. “Me too,” you whispered, your voice barely audible, but he heard it. “You feel different…good different,”.

“You know,” he started, “I didn’t think tonight would feel like this,”.

You tilted your head to look at him, your brows lifting slightly. “Like what?”.

“Like home,” he admitted, his lips curving into a small smile. “I thought it’d be fun, you know, easygoing. But being here with you? It’s more than that. It feels…right,”.

Your heart swelled at his words, the sincerity in his tone leaving no room for doubt. “I get that,” you said quietly, your fingers instinctively tightening around his. “It’s like…like I’ve known you forever, but also like I’m just starting to figure you out,”.

Joe nodded, his gaze softening as he looked at you. “Exactly. It’s crazy, isn’t it? How someone can just...fit into your life like they were always supposed to be there,”.

You felt your cheeks heat under his gaze, the intensity of his words making your pulse quicken. “I don’t know how you do it,” you said, your voice almost a whisper. “How you make me feel so safe and…seen,”.

His expression turned serious, the playful glint in his eyes replaced with something deeper. “You deserve to feel that way,” he said firmly. “Every single day. And I–” He paused, as if searching for the right words. “I want to be the one to make sure you do,”.

Your breath hitched at his confession, the weight of his words settling in your chest. You could see it in his eyes–he wasn’t just saying this. He meant every word.

“Joe…,” you started, but the emotion in your voice made it impossible to continue.

He leaned in, pressing another soft kiss to your temple. “It’s okay,” he murmured. “You don’t have to say anything right now. I just…needed you to know,”.

You nodded, your eyes stinging with emotion as you rested your head against his shoulder again. “Thank you,” you whispered, your voice trembling slightly. “For tonight. For…everything,”.

Joe smiled, his hand coming up to cradle your face gently. “You don’t have to thank me,” he said, his voice full of warmth. “I’d do it all over again, a hundred times, just to see you smile like that,”.

And in that moment, you realized you didn’t just feel different. You felt loved. Truly, deeply loved.

—

The drive back to Joe’s apartment was a mix of anticipation and tension so thick it could be cut with a knife. The earlier first date anxiety you both had at dinner had melted as fast as your heart did when Joe wrapped his arm around your waist, his touch firm, sure, and almost heated, to lead you out to his car. It was fully dark by the time you went outside, so all the stars were on full display in the night sky above you. You think you might have rambled on about the stars and constellations for about 10 minutes, not caring that Joe was silent the entire time and you were just talking on and on about the things you learned in your astrology class. He just watched in awe, letting you nerd out in the most adorable way possible. After a certain point, you got a little insecure at his silence so you quickly stopped in the middle of your mini-lesson about the meaning behind the Cassiopeia constellation, to which he replied by dropping a lingering kiss on your cheek, then on your ear and whispered, “Keep going. Hearing you talk nerd makes you even hotter than you already are,”.

That little comment sealed the deal. Now, there was a different kind of energy between you; it was magnetic, hot, and alluring; you could feel it in every shared glance, every quick touch. You had a taste of this energy earlier before you were interrupted by the restaurant staff who were a reminder that you two were still in public, but now that you were actually alone again, the energy was back and somehow stronger.

Joe’s hand rested on your bare thigh, his thumb absentmindedly drawing small circles against your skin. The touch was light, yet it sent ripples of electricity through your body. He looked at you a few times, his lips curling into a soft, cheeky grin that felt both charming and inviting. The dim light of the dashboard brightened his features, and you couldn’t help but let your gaze linger on the sharpness of his jawline and the way his adam's apple bobbed every time he swallowed.

“He’s…so so so hot,” you thought, feeling another rush of heat to your lower belly as your eyes roamed his thick, muscular body. “The angels themselves literally crafted him from gold. I mean, look at his arms? And oh…his hand on my thigh? I wonder what it feels like to have those hands all over your body? I just want those two hands on me at all fucking times, gripping my waist, sliding up and down my arm, squeezing my ass…Or that tongue painting pictures across my skin. Damn, I need him-,”. You swore you heard the sound of a bomb exploding because of the way you froze in fear, “What.” you mumbled, startled by your own thoughts, your quiet voice being drowned out by the hum of the tires against the road which prevented him from hearing you. “Woah, Y/N. Chill out? You’re getting way too ahead of yourself, relax. He told you how he felt, but what if he wants to take it slow? Stop letting your hormones control your logic,”.

But you couldn’t help it because Joe was just…something else. He wasn’t just sexy–though that was obvious–tonight, you saw a side of him that went beyond his looks. He was genuine, thoughtful, and comforting in ways you had never seen before. Every word he spoke, every action he took, showed just how deeply he cared, how much attention he gave to the little details that mattered to you. He was making you feel things you didn’t think you were capable of ever feeling, feelings you thought only existed in fantasies. He was a true gentleman, and all the nerves you had felt earlier seemed silly now. You couldn’t remember why you’d ever questioned this, why you’d hesitated.

The truth was that beneath all your hesitation laid a repressed thought–something you didn’t want to admit but were now ready to accept. You were falling for him; falling for Joe Burrow in a way that terrified you, yet also filled you with a sense of peace. It wasn’t supposed to feel this safe, this right. But for the first time in your life, you felt like you didn’t need a safety net. Because you knew, no matter what, he would catch you. And that was enough to make you take the leap, headfirst, into everything he had to offer. He told you how he felt about you, he showed you how he felt about you, and now it was your turn to reciprocate the energy. But you just didn’t know exactly how to do it.

You caught yourself staring at him for a little longer than you should have, deeply lost in your thoughts about him. He caught your gaze, the small tilt of his head prompting you to snap your head to the other side to face the window. He couldn’t help but stare at you when you weren’t looking at him. Joe’s looks at you lingered a little longer than usual, longer than he would let you see. He felt the exact same way about you, your beauty was as captivating as the night sky itself. The way your eyes twinkled in the light of the moon, the way your smile beamed brighter than the stars, the way your body fit so perfectly next to his. From your legs to your gentle thighs, to your soft belly, to your ample breasts, you were the hottest girl he had seen in all his years. He had no idea how he ended up with someone like you, who is not only beautiful physically but also beautiful as a human being.

“I need to feel her…like everywhere. Her nails dragging across my back, her legs around my waist, fuck even her pretty mouth whispering my name in my ear. She’s so pretty and I just–,” he thought before he froze, his breath hitching in his throat when he saw you move your hair to the side, exposing the crook of your neck. “Holy shit I-. Woah, Joe. Calm down, buddy. She’s not even your girlfriend yet and you’re having those thoughts? Don’t be weird. Easy tiger,” Joe shamefully thought as he imagined your neck displaying pretty purple marks from him. Almost imagined those imaginary purple marks to be a reminder to everyone that you were his.

Each passing thought strengthened the tension in the car. The date went great and when you left, you two were so giddy and smiley. But once you got into the car, it was silent. A silence that created a unique sense of nervousness that neither of you could understand. This unease stemmed from a shared feeling, but neither of you realized it. He told you how he felt, and despite telling you he didn’t need an answer from you immediately, he actually really wanted one now. You wanted to give it to him, but just didn’t know how.

When he pulled into the parking lot of his building, you felt your heartbeat quicken for maybe the thousandth time tonight. As you made your way inside, hand in hand, you realized that you’d never been inside his place before, so this was kind of a big deal? And the bubbling sexual tension wasn’t making it any better, either. You’d be in there, all alone, with nobody around, in the vicinity of his private bedroom, and his bed. This could either be as innocent as a movie and some cuddling, or as dangerous as a kiss lasting too long which would turn into being trapped under his sheets (and under him) for the rest of the night.

“Snap out of it!” you muttered out loud, prompting Joe to snap his head to you as he guided you through the lobby.

“Hm?” he questioned, a little jittery because of the silence being broken by something as jumpy as that.

“Fuck,” you whispered, before looking up at Joe as he led you into the elevator. “Sorry, just thinking out loud about something…uh..something dumb,” you stuttered, your brain failing to find an excuse.

Joe looked at you skeptically, his brows furrowing out of confusion. “Are you-,” he started to say before you were joined by a few other people in the elevator which infiltrated your privacy.

You let out a sigh of relief as the elevator was now filled with the chatter of the other apartment tenants, causing Joe to lose his chance to say something because you knew if he pressed you on it too hard, you wouldn’t have an actual explanation.

“Weird,” he thought to himself, glancing down at you and seeing you play with the birthstone ring on your finger—the ring he noticed you’d fidget with whenever you got anxious. He first noticed it when you first met at the football practice you accidentally stumbled into, and ever since then, he knew that this was an anxiety-related mechanism. But…why were you anxious right now? Did he do something?

“You alright?” Joe whispered, his hand giving yours a soft squeeze as he looked down at you with concern.

The quick rise and fall of your chest betrayed your nerves, and when you looked up at him, your face didn’t exactly match your nervous reply. “Y- yeah,” you said, the tone in your voice and the way you avoided his eyes told a different story.

Joe tilted his head, “Are you sure? Because you look–,”.

The ding of the elevator interrupted him, the doors sliding open to reveal his floor.

“C’mon,” you cut him off, pulling him out of the elevator and into the dimly lit hallway before he could finish.

Joe followed, his confusion only growing. You weren’t being subtle about dodging his concern, and he couldn’t help but wonder what had you so wound up all of a sudden.

When he unlocked the door and stepped inside, you were met by a space that felt unexpectedly personal, almost cozy. The first thing that caught your eye was how much of him was infused into the apartment.

It was clean but lived-in, with just enough mess to make it feel normal. A framed Athens high school jersey hung proudly on one wall, with a shelf of football memorabilia that added a subtle touch of his career so far. Near his small dining table, a Kid Cudi poster stood out against the neutral walls, its vibrant colors hinting at his taste in music.

Photos of him from his childhood, some with his parents, and some with his friends adorned the walls and little corner of the room. He seemed to enjoy displaying his most cherished memories and you couldn’t help but wonder if you’d ever find a photo of the two of you in here one day. You knew how much he valued these relationships, but seeing his value for them made that thought hit even harder.

Your eyes moved to the kitchen island, where a stack of science books sat next to a neatly folded dish towel. “Science books?” you thought to yourself, the detail catching you off guard in the best way. And then there was the Squidward sweatshirt draped over the back of the couch–a hilariously unexpected contrast to the more polished parts of the room.

You smiled, taking it all in. “Equally as nerdy as sporty. I love it,” you said, letting your eyes roam the space.

Joe set his keys down and turned toward you, his lips twitching into a grin. “You love it?”.

“Yeah,” you said, turning to face him fully. “Nothing about this screams football player bachelor pad. It’s…you. And I love that,”.

His smile softened, his gaze lingering on you for a moment. “I guess I wanted it to feel like home,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “I am pretty far from Ohio so I thought to make this home just like what I had there. I’m glad you think it does,”.

You nodded, letting the sweetness of his words settle over you as you stepped further into the apartment. The nervous energy that had taken over you in the elevator was starting to fade away, replaced by something quieter and more intimate as you realized just how much of himself Joe had let you see.

“Make yourself comfortable,” Joe said, the intimacy of the space wrapping around you like a warm blanket. You couldn’t tell if it was the apartment that felt homey, or Joe himself. He grabbed a couple of waters from the kitchen before gesturing toward his bedroom.

You hesitated, glancing at the door to his room and then back to him, the look on your face as if he had just told you to strip naked and lay out on his bed for him.

“Don’t worry,” he teased, catching your expression. “Just a movie. I promise,”.

You laughed nervously as he walked over to you and led you to his room, thinking, “Can we not watch it on the couch? Why his room. Am I being punished by the universe for something?”. You didn’t know how this would go–your hormones were all over the place and being so close to him on his bed was just a recipe for disaster.

When you made it inside his bedroom, you were instantly attracted to his bed–large, inviting, and neatly made with a navy blue comforter that seemed to mirror the color of his eyes. Even his room was clean? Either he did all this for you or he really was the complete opposite of the football player stereotype. There was only a little mess: some piles of clothes, textbooks scattered on his table along with what looked like his football notebook, and some empty water bottles.

He motioned for you to sit, and you settled on the edge, feeling a mix of nervous excitement and comfort as your eyes scanned the new surroundings.

He busied himself by setting up the movie–Spiderman: Homecoming–but as it started, neither of you paid any attention. Instead, the conversation from dinner picked back up effortlessly. You eventually lay side by side on his bed after he playfully dragged you up to him by your wrist, the faint glow of the TV illuminating the soft curve of his cute smile. But despite your giggling and silly joking, the electricity in the air from earlier returned. Every accidental brush of his arm against yours sent a jolt through you, and every time your knees bumped, your breath stopped. For the most part, you were doing great at keeping your cool, but you couldn’t help but feel the urge to finish what you started at dinner; to address the electricity humming between your bodies.

“So, do you ever get tired of being the golden boy?” you asked, changing the subject of the conversation from which Marvel superhero you’d want in your corner during the apocalypse. His answer was Wolverine because of his healing abilities and no half-dead human had shit on his claws. Your answer was Spiderman because of his webs, duh, but Joe disagreed and said his heroicness and need to save everyone would get him killed faster than he could swing out of danger. You went back and forth about it for almost 10 minutes before Joe took out the pillow from under his head and smothered you with it to get you to stop yapping about your Marvel crush, your giggles and shrieking filling the room.

Amidst the chaos, you noticed the calendar on his desk, filled with colorful notes that showed his busy schedule. Each day had clear markings for practice days, upcoming games, and other football events. Tonight’s date stood out with a small red heart, suggesting something special. You couldn't help but wonder if he ever wanted a break from his packed schedule–a moment to relax and breathe in the middle of the constant demands of the sport he loved.

“Golden boy? Is that what you think I am?” he questioned.

You nudged his shoulder gently as you played with the wristbands on his wrist, your heart melting as you saw the football ones. “Well, you’re extremely talented, ridiculously good-looking, and everyone loves you. If the shoe fits…,”.

Joe leaned into you slightly, a smirk tugging at his lips. “Ridiculously good-looking, huh? I think I like where this is going,”.

“Oh, stop it,” you giggled and rolled your eyes. “I just mean that ever since you got here, the spotlight’s been on you nonstop. That didn’t happen to you back at Ohio State. It must be different, right? Even difficult? You can’t go anywhere or do anything without random people coming up to you, and you have all this football stress on your shoulders too. I just wonder if it ever gets tiring. You never get a break, like it’s all football all the time. I don’t think I’d be able to survive what you do if I never got any peace and quiet,”.

He reached out, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers soft and gentle. The gesture was simple, but the affection in his touch made your heart flutter. “It does get tiring,” he said, his voice fainter now, almost as if he removed a layer from his words and was completely bare in front of you, “But I do get peace and quiet time. A lot more than you’d think, actually,”.

You raised an eyebrow, “Oh yeah? I don’t think watching an episode of The Office at your locker before practice is classified as peace and quiet time, Joey,”.

Joe chuckled, “That’s not the peace and quiet time I’m talking about. I’m talking about…you, Y/N”.

Oh.

Ohhh.

There it was. Those butterflies. They were blossoming in your stomach again, this time the feeling of them was stronger than they’d ever been before. Your eyes softened, your fingers pausing their fidgety movements as you inched them further down to clutch his. “Joe, I-,”.

“The time I spend with you…it's like everything else fades away,” Joe said, his voice soft and filled with emotion. “You’re my peace and quiet, you know that? When I’m with you, it’s like the rest of the world doesn’t matter–football, school, the whole Golden Boy thing. It all just…disappears,”.

His words made your chest tighten, a warmth blooming in your heart as you searched his face. There was something so raw in the way he looked at you, so open and vulnerable. You could see it in his eyes, the way they softened whenever they met yours. “You have this way of grounding me,” he continued, his voice dropping to barely above a whisper. “Just by being you. I don’t even think you realize it, but you calm me in a way no one else ever has. It’s like…I can finally breathe when I’m with you. I can stop hiding behind the helmet,”.

You felt your eyes well up, the sincerity in his voice hitting you right in the heart. “Joe,” you whispered, your voice trembling as you placed your other hand over his. “You don’t know what that means to me,”.

Being his calm, his peace? That meant the world to you and he had no idea. This was exactly why, every time someone asked about your relationship and you mentioned how short a time you’d known each other, it felt almost laughable. Because time didn’t explain any of this. Time didn’t explain the way he looked at you, like you were the only person in the room. It didn’t explain the way he instinctively knew when you needed reassurance, a touch, or just the sound of his voice saying your name. His actions told a different story–like you’d known each other for a lifetime.

He smiled, his thumb brushing a tear from your cheek before it could fall. “I don’t think you know what you mean to me,” he said. “I didn’t mean to get so heavy but I mean it. You’re my safe space, my escape from everything. You’re not just someone I like spending time with–you’re the reason I look forward to everything now. You’ve become my favorite person, Y/N,”.

His words wrapped around your heart, squeezing it in the best way. You couldn’t stop the tear that slipped down your cheek, but this time you didn’t care. “I don��t even know what to say,” you admitted, your voice barely audible. The shift in the energy from electric, to giddy, to soft was giving you whiplash–but you loved it. It almost mirrored your relationship with Joe; a plethora of emotions and feelings that had you swooning for him.

Joe shook his head, leaning in closer so his forehead rested against yours. He murmured, his lips ghosting over yours, “Just…stay. Be here with me. That’s all I’ll ever need,”.

You nodded, your hand slipping to the back of his neck as you pulled him into a soft, lingering kiss. It was a kiss that spoke everything you couldn’t put into words–a kiss that said I’m here, I’m not going anywhere, and I feel the same way.

When you finally pulled away, he rested his hand on your cheek, his thumb tracing slow circles. “I don’t care about anything else when I’m with you,” he said, his voice so full of love it made your heartache. “As long as I’ve got you, everything else is just…noise,”.

You smiled through your watery eyes, leaning into his touch. “You’ve got me, Joe. Always,” you promised, your voice steady despite the overwhelming emotions swirling inside you.

“I love what I do, trust me. But none of this is worth it, none of this is important if I don’t have someone to share it with,” he said, his hand settling on your hip and almost dragging you closer to him. His touch felt needy rather than soft.

Despite being one of the most talented players in college football, Joe never let the accolades, titles, or prestige define him. That wasn’t who he was. Instead, he displayed himself in the values that truly mattered–his actions, his words, his thoughts. And tonight, with what he had just told you, he had proven that all over again. It wasn’t the grandeur of his achievements that made your heart race; it was him. The way he saw the world, the way he saw his world, the way he saw you.

“And I want to share it with you. Only you. All of this right now and whatever the future brings, whether I go to the NFL or am stuck with some boring 9 to 5. I just want you with me. I don’t know what the future holds, all of this could fade away in the blink of an eye. But the one thing I’m sure about is you. Hell, you might be the only thing I’m sure about,” he confessed, his shoulders releasing the last bit of tension he had inside his body now that he’d told you everything he wanted to. Well…mostly everything.

You stared at him, unable to pull your gaze away because of what he just said to you. His eyes–lazy yet strikingly alert–held yours like they were trying to say something else his lips hadn’t quite figured out yet. You saw his eyes drop down to your lips here and there, you also felt his fingers slowly moving up and down your waist in a way that was far from innocent. There was a depth there, a feeling he wasn’t used to sharing so quickly but couldn’t seem to help when it came to you.

It hit you then, like a slow, steady wave.

He wanted you. No, he needed you. So much so that he couldn’t quite understand how he’d managed all these years without you by his side…without you in his arms.

And the truth was, you felt the exact same way.

“Fuck it,” you thought as he saw your eyes darken, and before he could process what you were doing, your lips were on his. The kiss was hesitant at first, a gentle exploration to see if he’d reciprocate the feeling, but the hunger beneath it grew quickly. His hand found its way to your cheek, holding you in place as his lips moved against yours with increasing passion.

He didn’t want to take it slow, and neither did you.

Your fingers gripped his shirt, pulling him closer as your heart pounded in your chest. His weight shifted, and he pressed you back against the bed, his body shifting to align with yours. The feel of him, solid and warm, made your head spin. The heat pooling in your panties was hard to ignore, so when he acknowledged it, you felt him smirk into your lips.

But just as the heat between you threatened to consume you both, Joe pulled back suddenly. His breathing was uneven, his face just inches from yours. His hands trembled slightly as they cupped your face, his thumbs brushing softly over your skin. “I don’t do this on the first date,” he said, his voice hoarse and raspy in a way that made your knees weak. “I just…I don’t want you to think this is all I want. Because it’s not. You’re not just a way for me to get laid. I really, really like you,”.

His words wrapped around you, melting away any lingering doubt. You reached up, your fingers brushing softly along his jawline, the vibe of the moment reflected in your gentle smile. “Joe,” you whispered, your voice barely above a breath as you leaned up to press your lips against his, “It’s okay. I don’t do this on the first date either. But with you…everything feels easy. Like I don’t have a care in the world. Like I don’t want to have a care in the world,”,

You gave into the electricity sparking between you, knowing that if you didn’t, you’d regret it for the rest of your life. The words that had been dancing on your tongue all night, scrambling to find their footing, had finally found their rhythm.

Your eyes searched his, the intensity of your emotions pouring out with every word. “Everything you just said to me…I feel it too. You see me in a way no one else ever has, and in a way no one else ever will. You make me feel safe–so safe–and loved in a way I didn’t even know I was searching for. I love your world and being a small part of it, getting a glimpse of what it’s like, has been the most exciting experience of my life,”. A soft pause settled between you, but it was full of meaning, your heart swelling as you continued. “You’re exactly what I’ve been waiting for, Joe. And now that I’ve found you, I don’t want to let go. I can’t let go. I want you. All of you. And I’m more than okay with this…with us. I want us.”.

“You mean it?” he asked you, his eyes softening at your confession.

You gave him a smirk and trailed your hand from his soft hair down his back, slipping your fingers under his shirt and lightly scraping your nails along the chiseled expanse of his skin. Your touch sent shivers down his spine, and then you pressed your lips against his to share the warmth he needed. You pulled at his bottom lip, tugging and nipping in a way that revealed your internal desires, “That answer your question?” you asked him after you pulled away.

Relief washed over his face, and he leaned in to kiss you again, hungrier this time, even slower so he could taste every single inch of you. “Hell yeah,” he smirked as he kissed you. His hands roamed your body with need, each touch more rougher than the last as if he physically couldn’t let go of you let alone want to. “I’ve wanted to do this the second I saw you in this dress,” he whispered, his big hands sliding all along your body over the silky fabric. His touch set each part of your skin ablaze, a fiery path being traced on your body as he grabbed and squeezed anything he could.

“Please, if you knew the thoughts…mmph, going through my..mm..head on the drive over…ah…here,” you mumbled, his kisses forcibly making you pause in between your words.

He pulled away from you, his face hovering above yours as he eyes had this raw, unfiltered need in them. A look you hadn’t ever seen in his eyes before, but a look that had you wanting him to consume every part of you. “You shoulda told me then and there,” he smirked. “I could’ve pulled over and fucked you in the back seat of my car if you were that horny,”.

Your breath hitched at his words, your cheeks turning red as his smirk deepened. “Joe,” you whispered, your voice trembling with both embarrassment and arousal.

“What?” he teased, his lips brushing against yours but never quite closing the distance. “Don’t tell me you wouldn’t have liked it, baby. The thought of you in my backseat, those pretty legs spread just for me…,”. He groaned softly, his hands sliding down your sides, gripping your hips as he pressed you firmly against him. “I’d have taken my time with you, baby,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your jawline, sending shivers down your spine. “Spreading you out across the seats, my hands gripping these perfect thighs…,” he paused, his grip tightening as if imagining it. “You’d be begging for me to go faster, harder. But I’d make you wait–make you feel every single second of it,”.

You whimpered, your head falling back as his lips traveled to the sensitive spot on your neck, his breath hot against your skin. “Joe,” you breathed, your fingers clutching his biceps, needing something to anchor yourself.

“Yeah, baby,” he groaned, his teeth nipping your skin before soothing the spot with his tongue. “I can just picture you, your back arched, those gorgeous lips of yours moaning my name while I ruin you in the back of my car,”.

Your heart raced, the mental image combined with his low, raspy voice making your knees weak. “Why didn’t we do that?” you managed to say, your voice shaky.

He chuckled darkly, his hands sliding down to cup your ass, pulling you against him. “Because I wanted to have you like this,” he said, his hips pressing against yours, emphasizing his words. “In my bed, where I could take my time and really show you just how crazy you drive me,”. His eyes locked onto yours, blazing with intensity. “But don’t think for a second I won’t make good on that backseat fantasy someday,” he promised, his voice rough with need. “Because, baby, I’ve got plans for you. So many fucking plans,”.

A shiver ran down your spine at the images his words painted. God, you would’ve loved for him to have his way with you in the back seat of his car. The thrill, the secrecy, the alertness…oh that would have driven you wild. “You’re ridiculous,” you muttered, but your voice betrayed you, dripping with need. The way his entire mood seamlessly switched from soft to drop-dead sexy? Oh yeah, you were in for a damn treat.

“Am I?” he challenged, dipping his head to kiss along your jawline, his lips hot and determined against your skin. “Or am I just saying what you’ve been thinking all night?” his teeth grazed your earlobe, and you gasped, your nails digging into his shoulders.

“Joe,” you moaned, arching into him, your body responding to every word, every touch. “God, you’re driving me insane,”.

“That’s the idea, baby,” he murmured against your neck, his voice husky. His hands slid beneath your thighs, lifting you slightly as he settled deeper between your legs. “So, tell me,” he whispered, his lips trailing lower. “What exactly were you thinking about? Hm? Tell me what you wanted me to do to you,”.

Your breathing was erratic as you tried to find the words. “I…I couldn’t stop thinking about your hands,” you confessed, your voice shaking but honest. “The way you touch me, like you can’t get enough of me…I wanted them everywhere,”.

His groan was throaty, his hands gripping you even tighter. “Fuck, baby,” he rasped. “You don’t know what you do to me,” his lips found yours again, this time with a desperation that matched the fire building between you. His hips pressed against yours, his hardness evident through the thin layers of clothing separating you. “You want my hands everywhere?” he breathed against your lips, his fingers slipping under the hem of your dress, dragging it up slowly. “Then you’ll get them everywhere,”.

Joe’s hands roamed higher, sliding up the smooth skin of your thighs, his touch igniting a fire that made your entire body ache with need. The anticipation was unbearable as his fingers teased the edge of your panties, his lips curving into a devilish smirk against your neck. “You’re already so wet,” he murmured, his voice low and rough, sending shivers down your spine. “All for me, huh?”

“All for you,” you breathed, your hands fisting the fabric of his shirt, desperate for more.

He pressed his hips against yours, grinding slowly, the friction making your head tilt back against the pillows. “You don’t know what you’re doing to me, lovey,” he said, his breath hot against your ear. “The way you moan my name, the way you look at me like you need me as much as I need you…fuck,”.

“I do need you,” you whispered, your voice trembling. “Joe, please. I need you now,”.

His eyes darkened, his restraint clearly slipping as he pulled back just enough to strip off his shirt, revealing his toned chest and the light sheen of sweat glistening on his skin. “Say it again,” he said, his voice commanding but soft, his fingers hooking around the waistband of your panties.

“I need you, Joe,” you repeated, your gaze locked on his, your voice laced with a mix of desperation and desire.

“That’s my girl,” he groaned, tugging your panties down and tossing them aside. His hands returned to your body, exploring every inch of exposed skin as if he couldn’t get enough. His lips found yours again, the kiss deep and consuming, leaving you breathless.

As the remaining layers of clothing were peeled away, there was a rush, an urgency–the two of you needed to feel each other in a way that felt as natural as breathing. His lips trailed down your neck, leaving a trail of heat in their path, while his hands explored every curve, every inch of skin, as if he was trying to memorize you by touch alone. He was so gentle with you yet so in control, talking you through every little thing, letting you know he was here with you, how beautiful you were, and how much he wanted this with you. The way he looked at you, seeing you completely bare for the first time, was burned into your memory. You thought he couldn’t get any more perfect, but he just continues to prove you wrong every time.

When he pushed into you, the world seemed to blur, leaving only him–his eyes locked on yours, his whispered words of reassurance and adoration keeping you stable. He moved with a rhythm that was equally as passionate as it was controlled–but you didn’t want him to be controlled. His forehead brushed against yours as he murmured your name like a prayer. “You’re so beautiful, baby,” he whispered, his voice shaky but steady. “You feel so good, fuck,”.

You threw your head back into the pillow as you felt his cock push into your core, exploring you in the most delicious way possible. “Joe. Harder, fuck me harder,” you whimpered, needing to feel him moving against you with no restraints.

“Y- you sure, beautiful?” he asked, your hands sliding down his sweaty back and into his hair. He was a little hesitant, not wanting to hurt you or push you too far since this was the first time you two were having sex.

“Y- yes, please,” you breathed, your voice shaky with need as your eyes fluttered open. When they met his, blown wide with lust, it was like a spark igniting a fire. The sight of his messy hair sticking to his forehead, the blush painting his cheeks, and the heat of his breath mingling with yours–it was intoxicating, a perfect cocktail of everything that was Joe.

“Tell me if it’s too much, okay? I need to know you’re okay,” he asked you before pressing a few featherlight kisses along your jaw.

“I’m okay,” you whispered, your fingers tangling in his damp hair, giving it a soft tug that made him groan. “I want this. I want you,”.

And then, as if that’s all he needed to hear, Joe’s restraint snapped like a tight spring, letting the hunger he had been holding back take over. His hips drove into yours with a need that made your entire body burn, your back arching as the intensity of his movements overwhelmed your senses. Each thrust sent shockwaves through you, his grip on your hips firm and commanding like he was staking his claim on every inch of you.

“You drive me crazy,” he growled against your skin, his voice thick with desire as his lips left a scorching path of wet kisses down your neck. “So fucking crazy, you know that?”, his teeth grazed your collarbone, drawing a sharp gasp from you that only seemed to urge him on. His hands explored your body with a possessive hunger like he was memorizing every curve, every dip, every place that made you tremble.

“Joe,” you whimpered, your fingers tangling in his hair again and pulling, a low, guttural sound escaping him as your nails raked across his scalp. “Don’t stop…please don’t stop,”.

“Never,” he rasped, his lips crashing against yours in a kiss so desperate and raw it left you breathless. His hands grabbed your wrists, pinning yours above your head so that he had you completely under his control, his body pressing into yours as if he couldn’t get close enough, couldn’t have enough of you. “I need you, baby. I’ve needed you for so long,” he confessed, his voice breaking, his movements growing rougher, more frenzied.

Your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him deeper, and the sound he made in response sent a delicious shiver through you. “Harder,” you pleaded, your voice trembling with need. No matter how much he gave you, you wanted more. “Fuck, Joe. Harder,”.

His eyes locked on yours, wild and glassy, as he delivered exactly what you asked for. His hips snapped against yours with relentless precision, every thrust sending you spiraling higher. His headboard banged against his wall, the bed beneath you creaking nonstop at the force of his thrusts. “God, you feel so fucking perfect,” he groaned, his forehead falling against yours. “You’re taking it so well, baby. Damn, where have you b- been all my life,”.

“Right here,” you gasped, your fingers clawing at his shoulders as your body arched again to meet his. “Right here, Joe. Always yours,”.

His breath hitched at your words, a groan spilling from his lips as his hips drove into you harder, deeper. The force of his movements made the headboard slam louder, but neither of you cared–the world outside that room didn’t exist. It was just the two of you, tangled in this moment, raw and unrestrained. You quite literally have never felt like this. None of the other guys you’d been with prior to Joe were this good, this attentive to what you liked. The way his cock was hitting every sweet spot inside you, pushing you beyond the limits you’d set yourself felt otherworldly. He was the best you’d ever had.

“Fuck, baby,” he murmured, his voice rough and breathless as he buried his face in the crook of your neck. His lips found your pulse, pressing kisses that sent shivers coursing through your body. “You’re everything, everything I’ve ever needed,”. Joe couldn’t get enough of you, enough of the way you were letting him care for you, enough of the way you were reacting to him. He just couldn’t–.

“Joe,” you whimpered, gripping the back of his neck, pulling him closer and snapping him out of his daze. “Don’t stop. Please don’t stop,”.

“I won’t,” he promised, his voice shaking with the feel of the moment. His hands slid down to your hips, holding you firmly as he angled himself deeper, his pace unrelenting yet filled with so much love it made your heartache. “I’m not stopping, baby. Not until you have everything,”.

His words sent you over the edge, your body trembling violently as you cried out his name, the sound echoing in the room like a melody. “Joe. Joe. Joee,” you moaned, your eyes rolling to the back of your head at the force of your high.

“Oh, fuck–,” he moaned at the sound of you whimpering his name, the feel of your walls clenching around him even more enticing than he imagined. “I’m gonna cum,” he said, his grip tightening around your hips as he pounded into you even harder.

“Oh,” you hissed, feeling his cock hit your sweet spot over and over which made the aftershocks of your high feel like pure bliss in your veins. “D- don’t pull out, Joey,” you panted, meeting his eyes once again.

He looked up at you, his face a mixture of amusement and confusion. “W- what?” he panted, his thrusts becoming uneven which signaled that he was so close.

“I’m on the pill. I don’t care,” you smiled at him, using your hand to brush back a few of his slick curls before planting a kiss on his chin. “Do whatever you want to me,”.

Joe's eyes darkened at your words, a low groan ripping from his throat as he buried himself even deeper inside you. “Fuck, baby,” he growled, his voice thick with need. “You’re gonna be the death of me,”.

You smiled lazily at him, your body trembling under his as you reached up to cup his cheek. “It’s a great way to die then,” you whispered, your voice dripping with desire.

That was all it took to send him over the edge. His hips slammed into yours with desperate urgency, his grip on your hips almost bruising as he chased his release. “Shit, Y/N,” he groaned, his head falling to your shoulder as his body tensed. “That’s my g- girl,”. As he stilled, his body shaking against yours, you could feel the warmth of him filling you, the new sensation sending a fresh wave of pleasure coursing through your body. His lips found yours in a messy, heated kiss, his breath mixing with yours as he tried to come down from the high. Sounds of skin-hitting skin were soon replaced by heavy breathing and the remnants of your climaxes.

When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, both of you panting and completely lost in the haze. His hands loosened their grip on your hips, moving to gently trace circles on your sides. “You okay?” he murmured, his voice soft but filled with concern.

You smiled up at him, your fingers threading through his damp curls. “Better than okay,” you whispered, brushing your lips against his. “You?”.

A grin spread across his face, that boyish charm shining through despite the flush in his cheeks. “Never better,” he said, pressing another kiss to your lips before trailing down to your jawline and collarbone. “You’re incredible, you know that?”.

You giggled softly, your hands sliding to rest on his shoulders. “So are you, Joey. So are you,”.

He collapsed onto the bed beside you, pulling you into his arms with ease. Even after going at it like rabid bunnies, he still had all his strength in him? Damn. The weight of his body against yours, the sound of his heartbeat under your ear–it was perfect. “I wasn’t kidding when I said you’d be the death of me,” he said, his tone teasing but his expression completely serious.

You looked up at him, your eyes shining with affection. “Good,” you replied with a smirk, pressing a kiss to his chest. “Because I’m not letting you go anytime soon,”.

“Promise?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper as his fingers brushed a strand of hair away from your face.

“Promise,” you said, sealing it with another kiss, one that felt like you were kissing each other's hearts. “Where have you been all my life?” you whispered, your voice shaky but laced with affection as you nuzzled into his chest.

He smiled against your hair, his arms tightening around you. “Right here,” he murmured, echoing your words from earlier, “Waiting for you,”.

Your breath hitched, and before you could say something, he continued, “You’re one of a kind, Y/N…one of a kind. Which is why…,” he paused, taking a deep breath as his face turned serious. “I want you to be my girlfriend,” he said, searching your eyes for an immediate reaction. “You’re rare…so fucking rare. It’s rare to meet a person like you in this life. And now that I have you, I don’t want to let you go. I know it hasn’t been that long since we’ve known each other, but I seriously have never been so sure about something in my entire life. I meant what I said about you being my peace and quiet. I need that peace and quiet every morning…every night…every week…every year…every time before a game…every time after a game…every time I need someone who can make everything around me disappear. I need someone like you, baby. Someone so perfect, someone who lights up my world the way you do. You’re the one who hangs the stars in my galaxy, the one who completes it,” he added, completely sure of what he was saying but suddenly feeling doubtful because of your blank, emotionless expression.

“Oh shit. I just scared her, didn’t I?” he instantly thought to himself, realizing how heavy his words were.

You continued to stare at him in silence, a flurry of butterflies swirling through your stomach and tickling your heart. You couldn’t believe this was real, that he was real.

“Fuck,” he breathed. “Fuck, I just ruined this, didn’t I? You probably want to take it slow and steady, which is fair because again, we just met not too long ago. And you’re probably stressed about the whole dating a football player thing, which is also fair but I swear I’m not like the other guys. Oh my god. Please don’t think I’m pushing you too fast or…trying to be smooth about this because we had sex…which might I say, it was the best fucking sex I’ve ever had. Wait, what the fuck am I saying? I swear I–,” he rambled in a panic before you leaned up and mashed your lips against his to shut him up.

His words were cut off by your lips, and he could feel you smiling into him as your chest rumbled from laughter. His nervousness from the dinner date was back, and you couldn’t help but admire how cute he got when he was unsure about something and got in his head. You pulled away, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion as his lips parted to say something, but before he could, you said, “You’re my boyfriend.”.

“Wait, what?” Joe asked even though he heard you loud and clear.

“I said…” you began before dropping another kiss to his lips. You pulled away and continued, “You.” then placed a kiss to the corner of his mouth, “Are.” and then a kiss to his chin., “My.” then a kiss to his cheek, “Boyfriend.” you finished, ending the sentence with one more kiss to his plump lips.

“You mean it?” he asked, genuinely needing you to reassure him because right now, it felt like he was dreaming.

You giggled, and the sound made Joe smile even harder than he already was. “I mean it one thousand percent, Boyfriend. You are all mine, and I am all yours. Completely, utterly, and irrevocably yours. You feel that electricity between us? That’s enough to prove to me that this is different. That you’re different,” you grinned. “You pulled out all the stops for tonight from the dress to the flowers and smarties–which had me on the floor by the way–and then everything at dinner, and now this? God, you’re like the perfect boyfriend, like the heart throbs in the movies. I know that you genuinely care about me and like me, you’ve shown me that since the day we met. And I really like you too, Joe. And I won’t lie when I say that this feels a little risky, but you’re a risk I’m willing to take. You know why? Because you make me feel alive, safe, and so damn loved. With you I'd dance in a storm, in my best dress, at any given time,”.

“God, I’m so obsessed with you,” he chuckled, the sound vibrating against your cheek, and before you knew it, he was leaning down to kiss you again, the heat between you reigniting like a flame. “I promise I won’t make you regret this. I promise I’ll make you feel loved until I physically can’t anymore. I promise I won’t let anything hurt you,”.

“And I’m going to hold you to it,” you mumbled between the kiss, letting your body reciprocate those words to him. The way it was responding to his touch was everything he needed to know; the subtle hooking of your leg around his waist, the graze of your nails along his bicep, and the way you were pushing up into him. “I promise I’m…going to be right there with you,” you whispered as he moved his lips from your mouth to your jaw, slowly kissing his way down your glistening body.

This time, the passion was unrestrained, the desire to feel each other again consuming you both completely. You could feel the growing urge to have each other like that again, and lucky for both of you, you two were so down bad to say no.

“Round two?” you teased, threading your fingers into his hair and pulling his face back to yours.

Joe looked at you and laughed, then slithered his hands around your hips and easily flipped you onto your back, prompting a shriek from your lips. “Anything for my girlfriend,”.

“Fantastic,” you shot back with a grin, pulling him down for another kiss. “I think your girlfriend deserves to be reminded of how much you care about her,” you teased before he locked lips with you once again, then used his hand to pull the sheets over you both.

End of flashback

“He hasn’t changed a single bit since LSU,” you giggled, your heart fluttering at how thoughtful and romantic his little gestures were.

Your eyes moved down to the other sticky note, this one reading,

P.S. made you breakfast before i left. your strawberry mango protein smoothie is waiting in the fridge

to be loved is to be seen, and i see you. always have, and always will.

j.b

“Joe,” you whispered, your eyes softening at his last sentence.

He saw you. He always saw you. He saw your anxieties, he saw your worries, but he also saw your smile, your happiness, your love for him. When he woke up this morning, he knew how awful the past day, past weeks have been for you. And it was all because of his current situation. When he looked at you, all he could see was the worry in your eyes and the hesitation in every word that left your mouth. He needed to do something to bring back that smile, that unwavering happiness that he fell in love with.

And you felt the same way about him. When you looked at him, all you saw was his self doubt, his fear of failing. You couldn’t see his confidence, his resilience anymore. Nobody could understand his internal struggles, not even you. But you sure as hell weren’t going to let them push you out.

And then as you stared at the sticky notes—a reminder of Joe and his adorable little gestures, you got an idea. One that could make him feel better, open up, and allow him to relax with you.

“He’s gone for a few hours, right? What if I do a little lunch date at home for him?” you asked yourself, already pulling out your phone to get started on the idea. This was a great way for him to unwind, for him to feel at ease after how awful the past few days had been for him. And it was also a great way for the two of you to spend time together, the time you’d been craving since football started back up. You both always thrived when it was just the two of you, in those little quiet moments that had you both feeling like you were back in college and didn’t have a care in the world. He was always so relaxed then, even though he was balling out and had the entire state of Louisiana breathing down his neck. He still managed to let loose, give himself some breathing room, a chance to be open despite the weight he had on his shoulders. Ever since he came into the NFL, it’s like there was no room for error for him, no room for him to show his emotions and be vulnerable. And when he did, he felt guilty about it because he felt like he was burdening everyone–especially you–with his feelings.

—

After finishing up your morning routine and enjoying the delicious smoothie he made for you, you got started on planning your surprise for him. You remembered him mentioning just last week, how he was craving Mexican food. That was all the inspiration you needed. You placed an order for his favorites from your usual go-to Mexican spot downtown, imagining the way his face would light up at the sight of the spread.

But you didn’t stop there. Knowing Joe, you wanted to add a little something extra–a surprise he’d never expect. You remembered the way he’d lit up talking about The Office Lego set he’d been eyeing for months but never seemed to have a reason for buying it for himself. He always listened to your mindless ramblings about things that caught your eye that you’d never buy for yourself–jewelry, clothes, shoes, bags–and always made sure to buy them for you as soon as he had the chance to. He didn’t ever need a reason to spoil his girl. That was one of the things you loved about him, he was always listening to you even when you thought he wasn’t. You did the same for him, so a few clicks later, the Legos were on their way to come just in time for your lunch date.

By the time everything was ready, the scene was nearly perfect: the food bags on the living room table, the Lego set placed beside them, and you impatiently waiting for him to come home. But as you sat there on the couch, looking at the setup, something felt off–like it was missing a little magic.

You tilted your head, thinking, and then it hit you like a spark of nostalgia.

A blanket fort.

A grin rose on your face as the memory of those cozy, rainy days you’d spent with Joe came rushing back–days when the two of you would build blanket forts and lose track of time, laughing, snacking, and just being kids at heart. “Oh, hell yeah,” you said to yourself, already gathering pillows and blankets, determined to recreate that same magic.

If there was one thing Joe loved more than food and Legos, it was the kind of thoughtfulness that made the simplest moments memorable. And you were about to do just that.

You grabbed a few dining room chairs, every plush blanket you could find, and a variety of cloud-like pillows, determined to create the ultimate cozy cave. Piece by piece, you began making your little fort, carefully lining up the chairs and draping the blankets across them with skill. You built a sturdy wall of pillows to keep it snug and inviting, even moving the lamp inside to give it a warm, comfy glow. After a few adjustments to make sure everything was stable, you stepped back to admire your work. The soft light lit up the cozy space, the blankets creating a cocoon of comfort that practically begged to be crawled into. It was perfect–inviting, intimate, and filled with the kind of charm you knew Joe would love.

“I really hope he likes this,” you mumbled to yourself, wanting nothing more than for him to be able to come home and just relax for the first time all week. Your thoughtfulness knew no limits, and Joe always appreciated the hell out of that so you knew he’d like everything you did for him no matter what.

A few minutes later, as you were carefully placing the food and Lego set inside of the fort, you heard the garage door open, a sign that Joe was finally home. You heard the clank of the keys hitting the kitchen island, and the muffled sounds of him slipping his shoes off, and then his soft voice breaking through the silence, “Baby? I’m home. You in here?” he called out, not seeing the blanket fort in yet.

“Over here!” you yelled, peeking your head out from the little cave and waving him over.

He furrowed his brows, a little confused at what you were doing, as he walked over to the couch. You noticed that he had something in his hand, a few bags that made your eyes widen: Taco Bell, Bath & Body Works, and Sephora? “What’s all this?” Joe laughed, seeing the architectural masterpiece that was your little blanket fort.

“What’s all that?” you shot back, pointing at all the bags in his hand.

Joe chuckled, setting the bags down on the table and glancing between you and the fort. “This? Just a little pick-me-up for my favorite person,” he said casually, but the slight blush on his cheeks betrayed how much thought he’d put into it. “I felt bad about last night, and everything that happened at the game, and just…, you know, not being around as much lately. Figured I’d spoil you a little tonight,”.

You felt your heart squeeze, the warmth of his words wrapping around you like one of the soft blankets in your fort. “Joe,” you said softly, your voice filled with affection. You quickly came out of the fort and stood up, his opening arms making room for you as usual. “That’s exactly why I did all this,” you gestured toward the fort with a small smile as his arms held you tightly against his warm chest.

He looked at you for a moment, his expression softening as his hands found your waist, pulling you closer. “You did all this for me?” he asked, his lips forming a little pout.

“Of course,” you replied, your voice barely above a whisper. “Last night…was rough…,” you began.

“In more ways than one,” Joe teased, his hand sliding down to your ass and giving it a little squeeze, reminding you just how rough things got last night.

“Right, in more ways than one,” you giggled. “It was rough and well, everything that happened during the game and you know, the game itself? I just thought you could use some time to relax and just be…Joe. Time for us to just be…us. I’ve missed you,” you sighed, the heaviness of the entire situation still bugging you. “I got you the Mexican food you’ve been craving all week, that Lego set you had your eye on, and topped it all off with the blanket fort. Just like old times,” you said, pressing a kiss to his chest.

Joe leaned down, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering there for a moment. “I’ve missed you too,” he mumbled, his heart aching at the confession.

He missed you–missed how easy and comfortable things felt in moments like this. The off-season had been full of moments like these, where it was just the two of you with no rush or stress. But ever since football started, those moments had just…disappeared. He missed the times when it wasn’t about games or busy schedules–just Joe and Y/N, together, feeling at home.

“Thank you for doing this. You always know how to get through to me even when I try to push you away,” he said, his hand moving up your body to cradle the back of your head. He pulled your head back and looked into your eyes briefly, trying to see if you had the same look as you did last night–the tension, the worry, and the fear. It was there, but only bits and pieces; meaning last night worked and everything he had planned for tonight was going to fully push those feelings out the door.

“I promised you that I’d always be there for you. Nothing, and I mean nothing, is going to stop me, okay?” you smiled, your hands moving up and resting on each side of his neck.

“I know,” he nodded. “That’s why I love you. You never back down from a fight,”.

“Exactly,” you smiled up at him, feeling the familiar rush of love that seemed to grow every time you were with him. “Looks like you had your own cozy day-in planned too, didn’t you?” you said, pulling away slightly to glance at the bags. “Taco Bell and Sephora? That’s quite the combo,”.

He grinned, “I know you love those little face masks andddd I also found that pedicure kit you’ve been wanting, so I thought maybe you would enjoy making me look like an alien later tonight and we can do those together. And, well, Taco Bell is my apology for taking so long to make time for this. Guilty pleasure foods are the way to your heart, that I know for a fact,”,

You laughed, shaking your head, “You are perfect, Joe Burrow. You know that? So damn perfect at being the world’s best boyfriend,”.

He glanced at the fort again, a mischievous smile spreading across his face. “Not as perfect as this. A blanket fort? I’m starting to think I’m the luckiest guy alive. I mean, not only do I have the world's greatest blanket fort in front of me right now, but I also have a smokin’ hot wif–...girlfriend, waiting for me every time I come home,”.

“Shit, almost slipped up there. Not yet, Joe. Just a little longer. The wait will be worth it,” he thought to himself.

You skipped right over his little slip-up and burst into laughter. “Easy there, Burrow. Your girlfriend is still recovering from last night. Give her some time to bounce back, would ya?” you teased, a playful grin spreading across your face.

Joe’s cheeks turned a deep shade of pink as he dropped his head onto your shoulder, his embarrassment absolutely adorable. “Sorry about that,” he mumbled, his voice muffled against your shirt. “Guess I got a little carried away,”.

You gently pulled him back so you could meet his eyes, the corners of your lips tugging into a smirk. “Don’t you dare apologize for being ridiculously good at making your girlfriend feel like she’s on cloud nine,” you murmured, pressing a soft kiss to his warm cheek as your fingers found their way into his hair.

His laugh bubbled out and his eyes crinkled at the corners in that way that made your heart skip. There he was–your Joey. The tension and heaviness from yesterday seemed to have vanished, replaced by this light, playful energy you adored so much. “Better mood today, huh?” you asked, rubbing the skin underneath his eye.

“Better everything,” he replied, his voice softer now, his blue eyes full of warmth as they locked on yours. “All because of you,”.

You exhaled, letting out a breath you’d been holding in for a long while, “I’m so glad. Last night was…I was worried about you–,” you started to say, but before you could finish, Joe pushed a finger to your lips.

“No,” he shook his head. “We don’t have to talk about that right now, okay? Don’t stress about it,”. And before you could say something else, he grabbed his hand, pulling you toward the fort. “Now c’mon, let’s see if the fort passes inspection,” he teased, crawling inside first and motioning for you to follow.

“It better pass the Joey B inspection. I put a lot of effort into this one,” you chuckled, a small shriek following after Joe grabbed your arm and pulled you into him as his back hit the pillows.

“It’s already a ten out of ten,” he grinned, his arms wrapping around your waist to keep you snug against him. His scent–fresh, a little woodsy, with a hint of something sweet–washed over you, making your heart flutter.

“You’re biased,” you teased, looking up at him with a playful pout. “You’d give anything I make a ten out of ten,”.

“Not true,” he said in mock offense. “Remember that time you tried to make brownies but forgot the sugar? I gave those a solid three,”.

You gasped, swatting his chest lightly. “That was one time! And you still ate half the tray,”.

“Because I love you, and I wasn’t about to let you feel bad about it,” he admitted with a soft chuckle, his fingers brushing a stray strand of hair from your face. His teasing tone turned into something warmer, more serious. “Besides, everything you do has your touch on it. That’s what makes it perfect to me,”.

Your playful grin softened as you took in his words. The way he looked at you, his eyes warm and sincere, made the world outside the blanket fort fade away. “You’re such a sap, Joey,” you whispered, your hand tracing slow circles on his chest.

“Only for you,” he murmured, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to your forehead. “Now, tell me–what’s the plan for this top-tier blanket fort? Because I see food, I see Legos, and I see the most beautiful girl in the world. Looks like a perfect date to me? We can do my side of the date–taco bell, face masks, pedicures, with your favorite candles–later tonight,”.

You laughed softly, the sound muffled against his chest as you snuggled closer. “Well, we eat first–because I know someone skipped lunch today–and then we tackle that Lego set. And maybe,” you added, peeking up at him with a mischievous glint in your eyes, “If you’re really good, I’ll let you have the last churro,”.

Joe’s face lit up with mock excitement. “The last churro? You’d really let me have that honor?”.

“Maybe,” you said sheepishly, booping his nose. “As long as you actually help build the Lego set this time and not get distracted and stare at me the whole time,”.

He laughed, the deep, thundering sound vibrating through you in the best way. “Deal. But I’m keeping the churro safe–no take-backs. And you can’t get mad if I stare at you here and there, you’re like crazy hot and I need to appreciate that you’re mine allll the time,” he smiled, the down-badness in his voice the same type of down-badness that used to be in his voice back in college. Under all that hard-shelled exterior, Joe was still the same as he was back at LSU. He may not let that side come out easily in front of others…or at all…but it always came out around you.

“You’re really trying to butter me up for the churro, aren’t you?” you teased, raising an eyebrow as you sat up, the playful suspicion in your voice clear.

Joe followed, sitting up behind you with that mischievous glimmer in his eye that always meant trouble. “Mmm,” he hummed nonchalantly, shifting ever so slightly. His arms moved as if he were about to pull you into a hug, but you quickly noticed something was off.

When his hand didn’t quite make it around your waist, you glanced over your shoulder to catch him red-handed–or rather, churro-handed. His fingers were sneaking their way into the bag of Mexican food, inching closer to the special dessert.

“Oh, you sneaky little–,” you started, turning around to confront him. But before you could finish, Joe tilted his head, catching your lips with his in a kiss that was equal parts distraction and charm. The unexpected move left you momentarily speechless, and in that tiny window of opportunity, he managed to carefully extract a churro from the bag. When he finally pulled back, his grin was nothing short of triumphant.

“Oops,” he giggled against your lips, holding up the churro like a prize. His eyes sparkled with mischief, his laughter contagious as you tried–and failed–to keep a straight face.

“Joey!” you groaned, swatting at his shoulder as he leaned back, already taking a bite of the churro with a smug look on his face.

“What?” he said, shrugging dramatically as if he were completely innocent. “I thought sharing is caring, babe,”.

“Oh, you are so lucky I love you,” you muttered, shaking your head as you reached for the other churro in the bag.

—

The two of you spent the rest of the afternoon tangled in each other and the cozy chaos of your little fort. Between bites of tacos and teasing arguments over Lego instructions, Joe’s laughter echoed through the space, filling it with a kind of warmth that you knew only he could bring. He was laughing, genuinely smiling, and having fun for the first time in a long time. It felt like whatever was weighing oh him last night was...gone. And when the sun began to set, casting a golden glow through the makeshift walls, he pulled you closer, his lips brushing against your temple as he whispered, “Thank you for this,”.

“For what?” you asked, your voice soft.

“For reminding me that no matter how crazy the world gets, I’ll always have a place where everything feels right,” he said, fiddling absently with the promise ring he’d given you a few years ago. “And that place is wherever you are,”.

“...Joe,” you mumbled, your eyes softening as you looked up at him.

“You know,” he started softly, “Yesterday was tough, but…it wasn’t on me. And I’ve learned I can’t hold onto that. Can’t let it eat me up like I used to. I did my best out on that field, I gave it my all like I always do. I made mistakes, the team made mistakes, but we all make mistakes. I can’t keep beating myself up over things I can’t control,” he exhaled, his thumb running over the diamond ring. “But that’s not what I want to talk about,”.

You tilted your head at him, puzzled because you thought he was going to talk to you about what was going on in his head. “What do you mean?”.

Joe’s eyes met yours, his blue eyes staring deeply into your soul almost. “I mean you. You never talk about how you’re feeling. You’re always so worried about me, about making sure I’m okay. But what about you? Tell me what’s going on in that head of yours? I know you’re hurting, Y/N. I know you cried before I got home last night. I know how much those comments hurt you. I know how much you’ve been trying to balance since I got hurt. I know how hard this is for you. And I know you’re not letting me see it because you think you’re protecting me,”.

The sincerity in his voice caught you off guard, and for a moment, you just blinked at him, your lips parting slightly. His hand tightened around yours, grounding you.

He saw.

He always saw right through you. He always saw how you’d try to keep yourself from hurting him. He always saw how much you’d put him first over yourself. He always saw how much you wanted to protect him.

To be loved is to be seen, and Joe always saw you.

“Talk to me, Y/N. You are always there when I need you…let me be there for you?” he nodded, his hand rubbing circles along your back to calm you down. He was going to get you to open up to him, even if it took a little push or a shove.

“I…,” you swallowed hard, feeling a lump form in your throat and tears starting to form in your eyes as the emotional dam felt like it was about to burst. All the feelings you were trying to suppress were coming to the surface, and all it took was for Joe to tell you that he could see it; your restraint, your need to protect him, your real feelings. “I don’t know. It’s…hard sometimes. Watching e- everything you go through. Seeing people tear you down or attack me…because of who you are. It’s like no matter what I do, it’s not enough. I can’t protect you from any of it,” you confessed, your voice trembling as you remembered everything those Chiefs fans said to you yesterday. “I get scared, you know? Seeing you shut down like that because of things that aren’t even your fault. I get scared when you start to d- doubt yourself. And I get scared when people say those awful things about you…about m- me…about us. You’ve worked so hard to come back from that wrist injury, that whole process was so hard on you physically and mentally. I just hate seeing people downplay what you went through. They all just want so much more from you, and I hate seeing you think that what you’re doing isn’t enough as is,”.

Joe’s expression softened, and he pulled you closer, his other hand reaching up to brush a stray tear from your cheek as it slipped free.“You’re not supposed to protect me,” he murmured. “That’s not your job. Just being here, being you…that’s everything I need. You’re the only good thing in my life that feels real, and I’d be lost without you. All the voices that implore ‘You should be doing more, Joe’, but to you I can admit, that I’m just too soft for all of it. I can always tell you how tiring it gets, I can always vent to you about how hard things get. That’s more than enough. You’re the only person who knows me…the real me, which is why you’re the only one I can confide in. You’re always there when I need you, to catch me when I fall. You make me feel safe, lovey. By just being you, being here with me, listening to whatever I have to say, letting me cry on your shoulder. You don’t need to do anything extra to protect me, ever. There’s a reason why I find myself running home to your sweet nothings. Outside, they're always pushing and shoving, but you're in the kitchen humming. All you’ve ever wanted from me is sweet nothing,” he said.

“That’s why I love you and I love the peace and quiet you bring me. You never want anything extra from me…never need me to do more than I already do. But when you start bottling up your feelings, bottling up your emotions…that peace and quiet starts to fade. You know why? Because you aren’t happy. Because you’re hurting, and that kills me more than anything else,”.

You felt your heartache from his words, a bittersweet mixture of comfort and longing setting over you. The way he opened up made it impossible not to let your own feelings spill out. You glanced down at your hands as you spoke, “This entire world,” you began softly, your voice trembling slightly, “It’s so chaotic. It’s...it’s scary. Those good moments, they’re brief. They last for a heartbeat, and then before you know it, something bad happens, and it feels like everything’s falling apart,” you said, referring to the wrist injury that came out of nowhere last season.

You took a shaky breath, meeting his gaze. His eyes were soft, filled with a tenderness that urged you to keep going. “But you? Us? Our relationship? That’s the one constant. The one thing that feels solid, unshakable. It’s like.. no matter how bad things get, no matter how lost I feel, I always have this place to hide. This place to seek shelter in the middle of the storm. And that place–it’s always with you. But ever since last November…I’ve had this nagging thought in the back of my head that maybe…the shelter is too good to be true. I’m scared that I’ll lose you…lose you to this world of football and unpredictable moments. I’m scared you’ll get too caught up in proving yourself…in being the best…too caught up in your head, and you’ll just–,”.

“No,” he quickly stopped you before those words fell from your mouth. “Don’t…don’t say that,” he said, his voice shaky as you saw his eyes water.

Another tear slipped from your eye as you kept going, “Even when I’m dreaming, I can feel you leaving. And I know I shouldn’t feel that way, especially because you’ve never given me a reason to doubt us…but I’m scared, Joe. I’m scared that I’m too much for you, that I’m pushing you too much and you’ll just…leave. I’m scared that what everyone said about me was right? I haven’t done enough to protect you, and I said I always would…but I didn’t,”. A sob escaped your lips and before you knew it, the tears were free-flowing down your cheeks, “I can’t,” you cried.

Joe felt his heart shatter at your confession.

You felt like he was going to leave?

Never in a million years would he ever think about leaving you…leaving his love…leaving his peace. Never in a million years would he ever even think about living his life without you in it.

“Baby,” he said with urgency, his hands moving up to your face, wiping the tears away. “Baby, look at me,”.

“I’m sorry, Joe. I don’t know why I feel like this…I don’t know why I can’t stop thinking that you’d be better off without me. I don’t know why I’m letting all of it get to me. I’m supposed to be better than that,”,

“Y/N.” he said, his voice loud enough to silence you. “Stop.”.

His words cracked something open inside you, and the tears came slowly now, silent but steady. Joe didn’t flinch, didn’t rush you. Instead, he slipped the promise ring from your right hand and slid it onto your ring finger, the gesture deliberate and filled with unspoken meaning.

“See this?” he said, holding up your hand so the ring caught the light. “This…it’s my promise to you. That no matter how loud the world gets, no matter how much they push and shove, this…us...it’s our quiet. It’s our peace. You are my peace and I am never leaving you. No matter how hard it gets…no matter how much I keep losing in the NFL. I am never leaving you. No matter how many injuries I have or how many fucking fans want to talk shit on me, I am never leaving you.

You sniffled, your hand trembling slightly in his. “Joe, I–”,

“Shh,” he whispered, his thumb now tracing the veins on the back of your left hand. The sensation was soothing, grounding you in a way only he could. “You need to know that I am sorry. I am so sorry that I haven’t seen how much you’ve been struggling since my injury. I am so sorry that I always get in a fucking shitty ass mood whenever shit doesn’t go my way. I am so sorry I’m always crying to you about my problems. That’s not how a relationship works. That’s not how we work. We always talk to each other and lean on each other for comfort and security. I’m so sorry that I’ve made you feel like you couldn’t do that. I’ve been trying to protect you by pushing you away, not knowing that it only hurt you more every time. I never wanted you to feel like I was pushing you away for good. I thought protecting you from me, from my doubts, and from all of the bullshit that’s been surrounding me lately would keep you safe. But I was so wrong. I need to keep you here with me, no matter how tough it gets because you’re the only one that can make it better. Winning won’t make anything better. My wrist being 100% won’t make anything better. The fans shutting up won’t make anything better. You? You will.”.

“I’m not going to leave you, Y/N. I made that clear on our first date back at LSU. Remember? I promised you to love you till I physically couldn’t. And I don’t ever plan on going back on that promise. Don’t ever feel like you’re a burden to me, that you’re pushing me too much, okay? Because without you I wouldn’t be able to do any of this. I wouldn’t be able to do this without you telling me how proud you are of me, without you being there for me after every loss with your arms open, ready to listen to whatever I have to say. I wouldn’t be able to do this without your constant motivation, reassurance, and unwavering support. It’s okay to crumble, to feel upset, and be sad. You are human, baby. It’s okay to worry and feel scared. But I’m here. I’m always here for you and I want you to know you can always tell me these things. I want you to know that I need you with me. I needed you then, I need you now, and I need you forever,”.

Your breath hitched as Joe’s words washed over you, their weight settling deep in your chest. It was like the dam had burst, finally releasing all the emotions you had been bottling up for so long. You stared at him through tear-filled eyes, his face so close to yours, so calm and full of love. The way he looked at you–like you were the only thing in the world that mattered–made your heartache in the best way.

“I…I don’t deserve you,” you whispered, your voice trembling. “I don’t know what I did to deserve someone like you, Joe,”.

“Stop that,” he said gently, cupping your face in his hands. His thumbs brushed away the tears that continued to fall, his touch soft and deliberate. “You deserve the world, Y/N. And if I could, I’d give it to you. But right now, all I can give you is me. All of me,”.

A sob escaped your lips as you leaned into his touch, your hands gripping his wrists as if letting go would shatter the moment. “You already give me everything,” you said, your voice cracking. “I don’t know what I’d do without you, Joe. I’m scared of even thinking about it,”.

“You don’t have to,” he murmured, leaning in to press a soft kiss to your forehead. “Because I’m not going anywhere. Not now, not ever. You are so much more than what those people think. You’re everything to me, I can’t lose you to any of this. If I don’t have someone to share this all with, then what even is the point? If I don’t have you, why am I even trying? I promise you that you’re doing just enough for me. I promise I’m not going anywhere, you’re not going anywhere, and I promise that you and I will always get through this together,”.

The promise in his voice broke through the last of your defenses. You collapsed against him, your arms wrapping around his neck as you buried your face in his chest. His arms came around you instantly, holding you tightly, as if shielding you from the weight of the world. He pressed his lips to the top of your head, murmuring softly, “It’s okay, baby. Let it out. I’ve got you,”.

And you did. You let it all out–the fear, the insecurity, the pressure you’d been carrying on your shoulders for far too long. You cried into his chest, and he held you through it all, his hand rubbing slow, soothing circles on your back. His other hand stayed on your left hand, his thumb tracing the veins there in that familiar, grounding gesture that had always calmed you.

When your sobs finally quieted, and your breathing began to steady, Joe pulled back just enough to look at you. His eyes searched yours, his expression full of concern and love. “Better?” he asked softly.

You nodded, sniffling as you wiped at your cheeks. “A little. Thanks to you.”

He smiled, that boyish grin that never failed to make your heart flutter. “Good. Because I’m not done yet,”.

“What do you mean?” you asked, a small laugh escaping despite the heaviness of the moment.

Joe tilted his head playfully, his fingers still holding your left hand. He glanced down at your promise ring, now on your ring finger, and gave it a small twist. “This right here,” he said, his voice low but firm, “Is just the beginning. You’re not just my girlfriend, Y/N. You’re my partner. My future. And one day, I’m going to replace this ring with a different one. One that means forever,”.

Your breath caught, your heart skipping a beat at his words. “Joe…,”.

He leaned in, his lips brushing yours in a kiss so tender it brought fresh tears to your eyes. When he pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, his voice barely above a whisper. “I love you, Y/N. More than anything. And I’m never letting you go. I am going to be right by your side through everything. We were made to do this together, and I realized that the first night you let me make you mine. It’s you and me forevermore,”.

The weight in your chest lifted, replaced by an overwhelming sense of love and safety. You smiled through your tears, your hands moving to cradle his face. “I love you too, Joey. Always,”.

Letting your feelings out to Joe, finally saying everything you had been holding onto for the past year, was more liberating and comforting than you ever could have imagined. It was better than any cozy day spent under a blanket or any attempt to distract yourself from the chaos inside. Joe had been right all along–your relationship was built on leaning on each other, on sharing everything, the good and the bad. He had been doing that with you from the start, and now it was your turn to do the same.

And now that you had, you felt...lighter.

You felt better because Joe had a way of making all those nagging doubts vanish. With his words, his touch, and his unwavering love, he silenced every awful thought that had taken root in your mind. He reminded you of who you were, of what you meant to him, and suddenly the world didn’t feel so overwhelming. Instead of being weighed down, you felt grounded, tethered to the one person who could always make everything okay. Joe felt all of his worries wash away too. He only needed to see you happy, see you at peace, for his own peace and quiet to come back.

“I love you, Y/N. Never forget that,” he whispered to you before wrapping his arms around you and pulling you closer to him, letting his heartbeat soothe any remaining doubts in your mind.

For a while, the two of you sat there, cocooned in the stillness, calmness of the moment. The world outside might as well not have existed. Joe’s fingers never stopped their gentle motions, tracing patterns over your hand, his forehead occasionally brushing against yours.

Finally, you broke the silence with a soft laugh, trying to lighten the mood. “Would you still love me if I was a worm?”.

Joe blinked, caught off guard, before his lips curved into a playful smirk. “A worm?” he echoed, his eyebrow rising. “Like…an actual worm? Wiggles and all?”.

You nodded enthusiastically, biting your lip to keep from giggling. “Yes! Like if I just…poof, turned into a worm right now,”.

He pretended to consider this very serious question, his lips pursed and his gaze narrowing as though deep in thought. “Hmm…worms don’t have arms, so you couldn’t hug me like this,” he said, tightening his hold on you in an exaggerated squeeze. “But yeah, I’d love you. Because then I could finally keep you safe from everything and take care of you without you fighting me on it,”.

You burst out laughing, your head falling back against his chest as his words sank in. “Joe, that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard,”.

“And you’re the most ridiculous person I’ve ever loved,” he teased, brushing his nose against yours affectionately. “It’s a perfect match,”.

Your laughter softened into a warm, lingering smile as you gazed at him. His eyes sparkled with mischief, but there was something deeper there–tenderness, devotion, and a reminder of the unshakable love that made your chest ache in the best way.

As the playfulness settled, he reached up to cradle your face, his thumb gently brushing over your cheek. “Everything might feel wrong in our life, but with each other? It’s alright,” he said softly, his voice filled with quiet sincerity. "We just need us. That's all,".

Your heart swelled, a warmth spreading through you that no blanket could replicate. You leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, and he hummed contentedly, pulling you closer. “See?” he murmured against your lips. “You’re stuck with me–worm or not,”.

And he meant that. He meant all of it. The two of you were meant to do this together, the connection between you was strong enough to outlast any storm that came your way. Joe knew you were his forever the night of his first date, and ever since then, he'd only made that clearer to you. It was just you and him, for the rest of your lives.

The bond you shared was unshakable, rooted in something far deeper than words could ever express. You both knew that no matter what life threw your way, as long as you were tethered to one another, the flame between you would never waver. It wasn’t just love—it was a connection so profound that it felt eternal, like the universe had stitched your hearts together with threads of stardust.

You didn’t need a ceremony to tell you what was already so obvious in the way he held you, spoke to you, and loved you. But the thought of that moment—when he would ask, when you would say yes—was enough to send a soft thrill through you.

Little did you know, that directly above you, inside the confines of his safe, sat the ring you had been dreaming of, waiting patiently for the right moment to appear on your finger. He had it since January, but he knew this was something so extraordinary that it could never be rushed.

And little did you know, that the moment you were dreaming of was coming sooner rather than later.

Until then, you found peace in the quiet certainty that your flame, your love, would burn brightly forever as long as you were together.

–The End–

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