#love you forever Shannon

[eddiediazenjoyer]

thinking about post established buddie conceptions of shannon makes me CRAZYYYYYY like we always talk about shannon and eddie being in the hole Together and how her asking for a divorce was her getting out and leaving eddie in it. but. crucially. she didn't actually get out of the hole bc she died. so in this world where buddie finally get together and eddie gets Out. where does that leave shannon? now he's the one leaving her in the hole as he gets out. bc she will forever be trapped on her way out of the hole. so close, but still in it. she didn't get to have ANYTHING, and eddie, bc he's the one who survived, gets to have everything. and she didn't even get to get a divorce. eddie gets to have it all, their son, a real, true love, a family-- an entire life and shannon is stuck forever asking for a divorce from a man who compared their marriage to falling into a vat of chocolate and slowly sinking to death. and he got to get out and learn what love and life should actually look like. but she never did. and i think eddie would hate himself for this

[camelspit]

never forget what they took from you (stinas character arc)

[daisychainsandbowties]

glad we are all liking the idea of a mary x shannon prequel movie that is structured like a tragedy but in the meantime you can basically read it here it’s by @meatshieldshotgun and yeah… destroyed me in the best way possible

[godsweakestsoldier]

Chapters: 1/3 Fandom: Warrior Nun (TV) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Shotgun Mary/Shannon Masters Characters: Shotgun Mary (Warrior Nun), Shannon Masters, Sister Beatrice (Warrior Nun), Sister Lilith (Warrior Nun) Additional Tags: aka the one in which we watch a car crash in slow motion, it's precanon yall, it made me cry a little, i cant tag for shit, major character death doesn't happen for a while, they're a little cute y'all Summary:

Devotion has always held a price. Mary knows and understands this. It's the knowledge of losing the thing worthy of devotion that tears through her.

She wonders if St. Peter had felt this way. - aka Mary and Shannon get comfortable with each other.

[merge-conflict]

every day I wake up and wish I had access to cyberpunk stuff written by someone who really truly absurdly loves computers

[himbobuck]

I'm watching Sort Your Life Out (an organizing show) and now I can't stop thinking of Buck and Eddie officially moving in the home they bought together and there are a lot of boxes to go through and decisions to be made because there is not enough space for everything and the angst that would cause. It's easy to get rid of the doubles, they keep Eddie's couch (because it's history) and go for the best quality kitchen equipment (mostly Buck's as he had invested in better stuff since learning to cook from Bobby). Getting rid of the more generic items that come from the loft seems fairly easy and they're making progress. But the mood changes as they make progress. Buck having a lot of crates from storage that he had shipped over from Pennsylvania when he knew he was going to be staying in LA but he never bothered bringing them into the loft because that wasn't the place he was going to settle in (and for the lack of space). And as they're going through stuff and Eddie suggests what to keep and what to donate/sell, maybe holds two items at a time one in each hand, Buck is getting more and more upset and can't let go of the most random things. Like he will be getting tearful over a keychain that came out of a easter egg from the last easter they spent with their grandparents or over the little piggy bank that's peeling apart that he got as a party favour at his bff birthday when he was a kid or over a box of dinosaurs plasters that are yellowish and probably don't stick anymore because his dad bought them for him when he was covered in scraps and bruises from getting hurt again over the set of completely new still boxed up moon/sun mugs he bought when he was 16 thinking one day he was going to drink coffee from with the love of his life sitting at the kitchen table on a sunday morning. And he knows that they have already agreed to keep enough mugs and then these are fully packaged and would be much easier to sell even, but he just can't let go of them. Lots of tears and cuddles ensue (and he wakes up in the morning to the smell of coffee..)

more thoughts? A study published in Pyschotraumatol explains that, since humans are a social species, a history of interpersonal trauma or loneliness can push us to overcompensate, sometimes by buying and forming relationships with possessions instead. This stems from being unable to trust people and instead putting faith in objects, Yap explains. (x)

I know technically Buck had Maddie growing up but that doesn't mean this is not something that could happen (and potentially I'd say maybe Maddie did it too, or went the completely opposite way of getting rid of everything except the most sentimentally valuable things - she did only have two suitcases when she ran away from Doug). I can see Buck using things as a mean of comfort, both random little things he had (not carefully chosen important things from his childhood that his parents didn't bother keeping for a baby box - assholes!!) but also things he accumulated for an imaginary/ideal future the used to dream about - the mugs, but also maybe a picture frame he could see himself displaying in the living room etc etc

feel free to gimme all your thoughts, do your worst cause i wanna cry

[doyoulikethissong-poll]

30 Seconds to Mars - Fallen 2002

The self-titled debut studio album by 30 Seconds to Mars was released in 2002 after having been in the works for a couple of years, with "Fallen" being one of - if not the - very oldest of the songs. The style of the album combined progressive metal and space rock with influences and elements from new wave and electronica, utilizing programming and synthesizers. The demo work of 30 Seconds to Mars generated the interest of record producer Bob Ezrin, who had previously worked on several groundbreaking projects, including The Wall by Pink Floyd, Love It to Death by Alice Cooper, and Destroyer by Kiss. Upon release, 30 Seconds to Mars received mostly positive reviews from music critics, who commended the album's lyrical content and the band's musicianship. The album debuted at number 107 on the Billboard 200 and number one on the US Top Heatseekers. While Shannon Leto played the drums, Jared played guitar, bass guitar and the synthesizer on "Fallen" in addition to singing.

THIS album and the following one, A Beautiful Lie, is what I mean when I say I'm forever a 30 Seconds to Mars fan and those two albums are my main playlist in my car. THIS music is what was so amazing to listen to. And so many of you agreed that "Fallen" sounded terrific, which makes me so happy!!! 😍💖💖💖💖 "Fallen" got a total of 62,4% total yes votes!

[watchyourbuck]

okay so just watched the new ep, here’s my 911 s7 ep 1 thoughts:

nearly broke down watching Shannon read the letter to Chris. “I love you, even from a distance.” I’m unwell.

the bucktalia breakup explanation was funny, but what was funnier and gayer was Eddie’s reaction to it sjdjdj

there’s absolutely no chemistry between Marisol and Eddie.

the whole Bathena marital struggles™️ arc doesn’t convince me too much tbh (although I understand Athena’s thought process & concerns).

Chris putting the Shannon frame back up and Eddie’s heart visibly repairing in front of us will forever haunt me btw

“never seen a man turn off a woman with such skills.” “it’s a gift.” fuck off u homosexual

during that same scene, Buck staring longingly and lovingly at Eddie will also forever haunt me

Buck saying the sexual tension line and Eddie almost passing out is very in character

I genuinely felt bad for Bobby during the whole episode

Madney dating and then not dating makes me fuzzy inside, they’re so obviously in love

shirtless Eddie and drooling Buck <3

Eddie eavesdropping on Buck & Chris and scrunching his face in pain made me stop the ep, sit down on the floor and scream

[capseycartwright]

miss me, but let me go

“I have - I’ve carried this grief, for you, for so long, and I know I can’t let it all go, because a part of me is always going to grieve for you,” Eddie paused. “But I can’t feel like this forever, Shannon. I don’t think you’d want me to, either. So - I need to let some of it go. Okay? I need to - I need to be myself now. For me, and for Christopher. I want to be me."

On November 1, Eddie builds an altar for Shannon and finds a way to let her go.

ao3 link

November 1. The date is not one Eddie is likely to ever forget. Even before Shannon died, Dia de los Muertos wasn’t a holiday he ever missed - as a child, he would help his abuelo make their altar every year, a picture of his abuelo front-and-centre, Edmundo Diaz Senior, the man he’d been named for, looking sharp in his suit as he looked out from the glass picture frame where he’d lived all of Eddie’s life. He’d never met his grandfather - only carried his name. 

Over the years, more faces found a home on the altar - friends, and family, time a fickle thing and the only certainty about life that it ended. Death was familiar, a constant in a world Eddie felt like he could never quite figure out.

After Shannon died -

The first November 1 after she died, Eddie built his own altar for the first time, explaining the tradition to Christopher. They had done it every year since, Christopher’s face in a set line as he made sure everything was absolutely perfect. No less than his mother deserved, Eddie knew. 

Shannon hadn’t grown up with the traditions of All Saints and All Souls, but she’d embraced them wholly when she and Eddie had gotten married, making the altar herself when Eddie wasn’t there. It felt right to honour her with the traditions she had loved herself. That was why Eddie had taken to adding a picture of Shannon’s mother to the altar too, when she died the year after Shannon did. Breast cancer, they’d said, but Eddie knew heartbreak had been the thing that had pushed her over the edge.

Every year, Eddie celebrated Shannon, and her mother, his grandfather, the people he’d served with who had died - 

Except this year.

Eddie felt bad. Really, he did - he was going to build the altar himself, but when his dad had texted a picture of the Diaz family altar, Shannon front and centre, Eddie couldn’t quite bring himself to make his own. Shannon was being remembered - that was what mattered. He’d gone to her grave instead, only half listening as the priest had said mass over the graveyard, praying for the salvation of the souls who were buried there.

Grief was a funny old beast, Eddie knew. Grief had made him do crazy things - grief had driven his son to Texas, for crying out loud. The grief didn’t hit standing by her grave, but it did when dusk descended over Eddie’s house, and the absence of an altar began to feel like one of the worst things he’d done amongst a year of terrible decision-making.

Maybe he should have taken Buck up on his offer of coming over to make an altar with him, but Eddie had asked enough of his best friend in the last four months. Eddie knew Tommy had bought them tickets for some movie Buck was dying to see, and as much as Eddie was a near-professional third wheel now, he didn’t think he’d make a good addition to the back row of their local movie theatre.

Eddie winced as he looked at the candle he’d swiped from the dining table. “It’s cedarwood,” he said, apologetic as he lit it, setting the candle down in front of the framed picture of Shannon that lived on their fireplace. “I know you hated cedarwood, but I’m working with what I’ve got here, Shan.”

Eddie pressed his cheek against his folded arms, taking one, two, three shaky breaths. “I really struggled after you left, Shannon. I don’t think I really even realised how much until now - and it’s not just because you were gone, but you were gone and you wanted a divorce, and I - suddenly, I was never going to get answers.”

He’d been talking about Shannon a lot in therapy, lately, unpacking all his complicated feelings during his excruciating weekly hour with Frank. 

“I don’t know if I even wanted to stay married to you,” Eddie admitted, the candle flickering in the growing dark of his living room. That was terrifying to admit out loud - that even if she had stayed alive, he and Shannon wouldn’t have made it work. There were a thousand reasons why, and Eddie could sit, and list them all, but one was more important than the others. 

“I think I’m gay, Shannon,” Eddie had never said it out loud before, despite the thought never quite leaving his mind, Pandora’s box open, now. “If you were here, I bet you’d have such a laugh with that - not like, in a bad way. Just - I think you’d find it funny, that your mom’s gaydar was right after all.” 

He couldn’t help but laugh at the thought himself. Shannon’s mom had been the bitchiest woman he’d ever met, and Eddie loved her for it. 

“I’ve made such a mess of things,” Eddie paused. “But with you, most of all. I’m sorry - for my part in it all. I thought I was doing the right thing, joining the army. I just wanted to take care of you and Chris, and I didn’t see any other way out. I know it was the wrong choice - but I really thought it was the right one. You know?”

Shannon’s picture stayed silent. 

“I have - I’ve carried this grief, for you, for so long, and I know I can’t let it all go, because a part of me is always going to grieve for you,” Eddie paused. For the life she might have had, if not for the car crash - Eddie sometimes liked to indulge himself and think of an alternative life where Shannon had survived, where they got divorced, and learned how to co-parent, and maybe they found their way back to being friends. It was a nice thought.

Eddie wiped roughly at his eyes. “But I can’t feel like this forever, Shannon. I don’t think you’d want me to, either. So - I need to let some of it go. Okay? I need to - I need to be myself now. For me, and for Christopher. I want to be me.” 

With a shaky hand, Eddie pressed a kiss to the framed picture, setting Shannon back down with the candle. It was a half-assed altar, and somehow, that made Eddie feel worse. He scrambled to his feet, heading for his bedroom, and the box of Shannon’s belongings he knew was stashed at the back of his wardrobe. He hadn’t kept much for himself - most of it was for Christopher - but he had a few things. There was a necklace in there, he knew that Eddie had bought her for their first wedding anniversary. It was a cheap thing, because they were always broke, but it was something of hers - it would make it a more acceptable offering.

Eddie couldn’t help the breath that hitched in his throat as he spotted what was in his bedroom. A butterfly, resting on his pillowcase, on the side he always slept on. “Hey, little guy,” he whispered softly, not wanting to startle the tiny creature. His abuela loved butterflies - they were spirits of the people you loved, who had left, coming back to visit. Eddie felt slightly ridiculous, but he said it anyway. “Shannon?”

The butterfly didn’t move. 

“I’m so glad Christopher isn’t here, because he would really think I’ve lost it,” Eddie crouched by the side of his bed, holding out a finger. “Hey. Is this your way of telling me it’s okay to let you go? Did you hear all of that?” 

The butterfly moved, tiny wings fluttering as it came to land on Eddie’s outstretched finger. 

“I hope that’s a yes,” Eddie knew tears were streaming down his cheeks, now, but he didn’t want to freak the butterfly out by wiping them away. “How did you get in here, eh? None of the windows are open.”

If Eddie Diaz believed in a higher power, still, he’d blame God - or the universe. 

“Let’s get you outside,” Eddie said, and the butterfly flapped, a little, coming to land on the windowsill instead. “Yeah? You’re ready to go?”

The butterfly flapped in response again.

“I think I’m ready to let you go, this time,” Eddie admitted, carefully unlatching the window. “We’re going to be okay, me and Christopher. I promise. You can go. You don’t need to worry about us.” 

The butterfly seemed to pause, for a second, before it flew out the open window, disappearing into the beginnings of the evening. Eddie wasn’t sure how long he stood there, tears pouring down his cheeks, rolling off the curve of his chin and onto his shirt, but the next thing he knew, he could hear - 

“Buck?”

“Eddie! You’re a firefighter - how long have you left that candle unattended, huh? Eddie - Eddie, where are you, man?”

Buck appeared in the doorway of Eddie’s bedroom, a family-sized bag of sour patch kids tucked under one arm. “Do I need to teach you the basics of fire safety all over again?” he huffed, pausing as he noticed Eddie’s tears. “Eddie - you okay?”

“Yeah,” Eddie offered his best friend a teary smile. For the first time, Eddie might actually mean that yes. “I’m okay. There - there was a butterfly,” he explained, gesturing at the window vaguely. “I had to let it out.”

“A butterfly?” Buck looked confused. 

“My abuela always said butterflies were the spirits of people who’ve died,” Eddie explained. “I lit a candle for Shannon, and there was a butterfly just sitting on my pillow, when I came in here. It’s…” he paused. “It’s stupid.”  

Buck’s face softened. ‘It’s not stupid,” he shook his head. “You think it was Shannon?”

Eddie glanced at the window again. “I hope it was,” he admitted, taking a deep breath before he closed the window. That in itself felt like symbolism, Eddie decided - a closing of a chapter he should have let go a long time ago. That’s what he needed it to be, at least. “Wait - aren’t you meant to be on a date?”

Bcuk shrugged. “We changed the tickets to tomorrow,” he explained, holding up the bag of candy. “You said you weren’t going to make an altar, and I didn’t want to let you skip out on it. These were her favourite, right?” 

Eddie could cry all over again. Buck, like Shannon, hadn’t grown up with Dia de los Muertos, but here he was, with a bag of Eddie’s dead wife’s favourite candy, ready to sit in Eddie’s grief with him. Eddie wasn’t sure what he’d done in a previous life to deserve a friend like Evan Buckley, but he thanked whatever God or universe was listening for giving him Buck anyway.

“She’d eat so many she’d give herself a stomach-ache,” Eddie grinned, and the memory didn’t hurt, the way it used to, the grief a dull ache that he could grow around, now. He leaned into the embrace Buck offered, breathing in the familiar cedarwood scent of Buck’s favourite cologne. “Thanks. For being here.”

“Nowhere I’d rather be,” Buck hummed, pressing a ridiculous, loud, smacking kiss to the top of Eddie’s head. Eddie loved him. “But I’m buying you one of those electric candle warmers if you’re going to keep leaving candles unattended, Eddie.” 

Eddie was mostly listening as he let Buck guide him back to the living room, the candle still flickering golden in front of Shannon’s picture. It was the same one he’d put on her memorial programme - bright, and beautiful, just like she’d always been when she was alive. 

Buck grinned, as he set a piece of candy in front of her picture. “Berry,” he explained. “My favourite,” he added, tossing a handful of the sour sweets into his own mouth. 

They sat, the television playing reruns of a procedural in the background, eating candy until their stomachs hurt, the candle burning all the way to the end. 

The butterfly didn’t come back.

Buck stayed.

Eddie was ready to move on.

(Buck stayed.)

[lover-of-mine]

Okay, my insane theory that I was waiting for the episode to see if I'm right or not. This is a lot more from the business side of things than something actually plot-related. But the thing is, about a year ago, at some point during the s6-7 hiatus, I made a post about how I thought the show had written themselves into a corner when it comes to buddie basically because the stakes are too high (the post is here but please keep in mind I wrote this before Buck bi and thinking about the way fox dealt with them, and we have since found out something was supposed to happen in s4 and they were censored by fox and we are not dealing with that anymore, I will explain my thought process here tho). But basically, I thought that they were not gonna do buddie because the expectations around buddie were too high, and it was easier to play with their tension forever than getting them together.

Because the thing is, we are talking about a six plus seasons queer slowburn that already has a lot in canon, between Chris, the well, the shooting, the lightning, the fact that they are best friend partners, there's a lot at stake and the correct lead up can make it seem as if buddie has been planned when watching the whole show. And since buddie is already insane, buddie in a romantic setting would have to exceed expectations. There's also the way that since Buck and Eddie work together and are partners on the field, they would have to acknowledge buddie every episode they were both in, something that is not true for madney or bathena, so that means that at some level they would have to be okay with the show being known as the buddie show at some level. The way that buddie has the potential to be the first relationship of its kind, a queer multiseason network slowburn, means that there will be people who will watch the show because of buddie. I know I joke about how buddie will make 911 go down in television history, but it is true, buddie will be placed next to big television love stories, people will teach classes on buddie in film school, so they need to be okay with that focus on the relationship existing and potentially being the thing people talk about when thinking about the show. With season 6 knowledge, I thought that at best they would have buddie kiss in the last 10 minutes of the series finale just to say they did it because I did not believe that they would want to be forced to write buddie into every episode and deal with the external focus on them. Now, knowing that fox blocked Buck bi and with the way they didn't even let Oliver and Ryan stand next to each other, I believe fox was never gonna let buddie be what they could be.

We have different rules now. My thing there is the way that they would have to deal with the external focus on them and to acknowledge buddie every episode, right? Well, they set Oliver and Ryan lose last season, including paired, and they let them say all sorts of things, the I love you to the core, buddie wedding season 10, giving the people what they want, there's no competition for Eddie, Buck fills the space Shannon was support to have, every interview Oliver, Ryan or Tim do mentions buddie, so they clearly don't care if people discover the show through buddie, they seem to be leaning into it even. For example, the first video we got for s8 was a ryliver video. So that part is covered, they are fine with it. So that leaves us with the acknowledging buddie every episode. They are doing that. I think everyone knows I'm doing the buddie supercuts by now (if not you can find the ones that are done here), but I wrote a meta about this, something that happened in s7 that was not true in the previous seasons is the fact that buddie has at least one moment every single episode, 1 we had the whole partnership/co-parent thing, 2 we had the thing at the locker room, 3 we had them finishing each other sentences while moving around each other during the rescue, 4 and 5 I don't even need to say it, right, 6 we had the bachelor party, 7 we had the Buckley-Diaz family scene, 9 we had the kitchen scene, and 10 had all that partnership/co-parent thing again. So s7 proved that they don't care about writing buddie into every episode. 801 has a lot of buddie, my cut of the episode amounted to 11 minutes and 33 seconds, that's 27% of the episode, the only episode they have more than that is under pressure, which is saying something. 802 we also had some buddie squeezed in there even though the episode was about the plane. That was an Athena episode, but we still got buddie. So my whole thing with the post I made this morning was about the concept of them adding a buddie scene even though they started the episode physically separated. And Well, I'm gonna count this as my buddie shoutout. They were together on the plane, and we got that little look at the end.

I think, like Tim said in the interviews for s7, that they are trying to work a little buddie every episode because it is a core part of the show, and that is a way to get the audience used to having at least a little buddie every episode. And I think that's the biggest sign that something has shifted and buddie is cooking.

Anyway, yeah, that's the theory. If you read this I love you 🫶.

[hunybody]

shannon and eddie one week out from their high school graduation. there's a wedding potluck happening in her mom's backyard. shannon is wearing converse with her white sundress. they're sitting on the sidewalk street curb by her driveway. their knees are touching. he's wearing jeans. they're a little short on him because he had a late growth spurt toward the end of high school, like boys do sometimes. neither of them are going to college. neither of them want to get married. eddie softly offers to take her out of the state. you know, if she... needed to find a doctor... he would be there. and shannon says thanks. but my mom would hate me forever. and eddie says yeah. mine too. and so they get married because they're two kids who don't want their moms to hate them. because their moms already love that grandchild more than their son and daughter

[bradhotshots]

eddie and shannon fascinating for like 1 million reasons but one of them is whenever shannon is brought up u rly see eddies like central conflict of im a father in my late 20’s/early 30’s and i have to be responsible vs like i became a father as a teenager and im kind of stuck in that moment of pure adult terror that i didnt know how to deal with as a child. so he’s constantly back and forth between doing the responsible thing and stamping his feet and yelling ‘you said you would love me forever and ever and be my best friend what the fuuuuuuuuck’

[thelikesofus]

Buddie Fic Recs

REC LIST NUMBER 6! The theme is PINING if you couldn’t already tell. I haven’t done a lot of writing recently but I have done A LOT of reading so here are some of the lovely stories I have come across over the last few weeks. As always, please show these authors some love in their comments xx REMINDER TO CHECK THE TAGS AND TRIGGER WARNINGS

where our eyes are never closing by @rewritetheending | T | 6k

After the lightning strike, Buck asks Eddie to take candid photos of him to help prove to Buck that he still exists. Absolute PEAK Softness. Buck through Eddie's eyes! I was a mushy puddle by the end. 10/10 would recommend

put my heart inside your palms by @markofalover | T | 3k

An accidental pet name, a thoughtful dinner, and a shared shirt. Buddie are too domestic for my health and well-being! I want what they have!!

because we'll all arrive in heaven alive by @neverevan | E | 75k 

During a search and rescue, Eddie disappears without a trace, leaving Buck to grapple with the sudden possibility of a life without him AKA the Mudslide Missing!Eddie fic with pining for daaayyyyyyyzzzzzzz

Left Unsaid by C_M2 | M | 33k 

The discovery of a small facebook group full of tsunami survivors rocks station 118. This fic is amazing!! The perfect amount of pining angst, domestic feels and firefam love and goodness 💕💕

If I Should Fall by @elvensorceress | T | 23k

Buck thinks Tommy has died but it's actually Eddie. He is not dead but almost and they have to figure things out from there. This fic had me feeling like my heart has been gutted from my chest and dissected before my very eyes but it has the happy ending we all deserve. 

the distance to the stars by cloudydaisies | G | 27k

Eddie is the only one who doesn't realize he and Buck are dating 😭 This is a perfectly sweet and angsty miscommunication fic. 

the weekly bet (but the forever kind) by @theleftboobgrabber | E | 49k

The firehouse has a bet and Buck and Eddie work it in their favor. Once again Eddie pining for dayyyyzzzzzzzzzzz. (I’ve been on a Pining!Eddie kick recently). Perfect Buckley Diaz family feels. 

light me and i'll burn for you by @woodchoc-magnum | M | 31k

An old friend of Buck's joins the 118 and he kinda sucks. Eddie pines and falls down a hole (literally). Seriously though the pining and the angst in this fic is just delicious and with a happy ending to boot <3

The Aftermath of Liberation and Love Confessions by @elvensorceress | T | 17k

Eddie makes the love confession to end all love confessions while perfecting the balance between pining and not giving a f*ck. I love me a Jenwyn fic and this one is fabulous as always. 

love bites so deep and we've got tiger teeth by @usereddie | M | 10k

Rather than going to texas with his grandparents Christopher goes to stay with Buck for an extended sleepover and Eddie realizes he is incredibly in love with his best friend. Honestly I am OBSESSED!!! This is officially my season 7 ending <3

hearts on fire by @woodchoc-magnum | M | 65k

This is a canon divergence on Season 2 where Buck and Eddie almost get together but then Abby comes back and Eddie lets buck go and then regrets it while trying to be happy for him. The pining, the self-sabotage, honestly is all one big tasty meal and topped off with a happy ending and a side salad of the Shannon and Eddie friends/co-parents arc that they deserved!!

like a dog with a bird at your door by @shitouttabuck | E | 51k

Set post s6, Eddie is injured on a call and Buck moves in to help with his recovery whilst learning to navigate his feelings for his best friend and pining for the position Eddie’s girlfriend holds. honestly, I’m actually only halfway through reading this fic but OMG I’M ASDFFGGHJJKKL and I just already knew this would be making it onto the next rec list so I'm adding it to this one preemptively. 

[threebooksoneplot]

what draws you both to jalice/makes you so feral about them as a ship?

you should know we had an entire meeting in order to answer this ask. no this could NOT have been an email (unlike new moon) 🤭

Secretary G took notes. they are as follows (read the bolded parts for a tl;dr)

we kind of see it as though jalice got the traits that edbella weren’t allowed to have, either due to their status as protagonists or because smeyer's mormon background causes her to view these qualities as too sinful/negative for her wholesome Waiting Until Marriage main couple. (examples: alice's materialistic, "shallow," hyperfeminine qualities, her character flaws (especially her manipulativeness), and jasper's aura and history of fucked up violence closer to what you'd find in traditional vampire stories/horror/adult gothics/books not written by a mormon author)

in terms of how much screentime the non-main-love-triangle canon couples get, their relationship is kiiiinda given the next-most weight to edbella’s (examples: jasper's extreme overprotectiveness, the New Moon chapter 19 moment where alice prioritizes jasper and bella is like “yeah I get it, I would do the same.”) basically smeyer gives jalice's relationship a lot of the qualities she finds romantic/ideal, (and which are either similarly romantic to us or entertainingly toxic/a good source of drama), presumably because alice is like her 4th-favorite character after the main love triangle and she wants nice things for her

we both really love how, superficially, as presented in the books, jasper and alice seem to have this almost “courtly love” that smeyer has described as "spiritual." yet when you look closer, their relationship has so many darker undertones—the deep codependency bordering on obsessiveness (mutual, but especially the way it manifests on jasper's end—"I will kill this random teen girl who witnessed edward's jean valjean moment™ because any means are justifiable when the ends are Protecting Alice"), the dark sides of both of their powers, the idea that jasper is only a cullen and/or only a vegetarian for alice's sake, etc. hell, even the fact that they're the only Cullen couple who we know had (gasp) premarital sex 😏 (I mean we assume rosemmett did too, but alas, they don't have that hilarious "carlisle convinced jasper and alice to get married" quote from smeyer)

partially summarized: "jasper’s general desperate willingness to sell everyone to satan for one corn chip if it keeps alice safe (carlisle: I know this and I love you)"

we're forever smug that the movies gave us even more jalice screentime (especially remarkable in such a protagonist-centric universe), including jasper being in the same grade as alice/bella/edward, and the extra jalice kisses in Eclipse and BD 🥺

what we wrote down as the “who’s protecting whom" phenomenon, as coined by G in this old ask. (shannon: "jasper is the toddler you've given the PS2 controller that's not plugged in")

we also like the characters individually. jasper is for the girlies with competency kinks—a stoic caretaker who speaks little and mostly expresses himself via acts of service. we also both love the way in which he needs protection from his own uncontrolled violence (slipping up and killing humans, suffering the pain and fear he inflicts, etc.) he is, in the words of our beloved @liceparade, the "line cook trauma boyfriend"

“It’s hot when there’s a fictional violent man who wet babygirl 😌” —shannon

and alice, unlike bella, genuinely loves being spoiled and bossing people around. she's brat-coded, she's confident and secure in who she is, her god complex ("I'm close enough [to omniscient]") causes fascinating conflict, bella eats drywall from sheer horniness at her merest movement, she dresses like a slut in the Mormon YA Novels and yet somehow escapes authorial condemnation, she has a sickass gothic heroine backstory, she's "annoying," aro started a whole war over her (eat shit helen of troy 🖕), she spaces out in public and has to be led around by jasper, she's one of the most powerful vampires in the world, she's in high school getting a C+ on her precalc test 💅🏻

it's appealing that smeyer frequently puts alice in the center of the series' various conflicts (james' singer and "one that got away," the accidental cause of all the drama at the end of new moon, one of aro's secret True motives for starting the conflict in BD.) this is mostly as a consequence of smeyer using alice as a plot device and/or deus ex machina, but it is in fact interesting

is alice jasper's morality chain? we love pondering this question via fic, meta, etc (especially because...alice ain't exactly a model of ethical behavior herself)

together, the two of them exhibit lots of classic tropes. they're grumpy x sunshine, chatty x silent, opposites attract, etc. to say nothing of that height difference 🥵

we love the yin/yang symbolism of a character with a horrific past paired with a character with NO memory of her past, who is focused on the future and all about potential. not to invoke an ancient phrase but POETIC CINEMA

the next note just says “POTENTIAL in general.” I assume we meant how all of the above stuff creates potential for interesting stories, conflicts, metas, art, fic, etc

G has brought this up in the past, but we love the irony of jasper, a character whose chief desire is to be left in peace, being soul-alteringly in love with the one character who will always be a giant glaring target through no fault of her own. hilarious

[handsomewickerman]

Some thoughts on Eddie Diaz vs. Fanon Gay Eddie

I wanna preface this by saying that i'm latino, gay, raised catholic, heard the phrase "you gotta be the man of the house" my whole life. So on paper the idea of "repressed gay Eddie Diaz" should be appealing to me, right? well not exactly and here's why:

when I started watching the show I was aware of buddie, but I never engaged with the fandom. It wasn't until Buck came out that I started interacting with it.

when you join any space online the algorithm feeds you the most popular stuff, in this case, all my 911 recommendations were buddie, at the time I saw the vision, after all I love queer rep! but after the date episode and all throughout the hiatus I realized something very quickly:

most buddies don't actually care about queer rep, they just wanted their ship to go canon.

this realization came after weeks of seeing them spew bi/homophobic rhetoric and claiming it didn't matter as long as they got buddie, some examples:

- saying they wanted Buck to play into the bisexual cheating stereotype.

- calling Tommy a groomer, creep and predator.

- being unable to fathom the idea that Tommy was just hanging out with Eddie as friends

- claiming Eddie being a pos shit to women was ok "as long as he's gay".

- the insistence that Eddie should only be read as gay (not even bi).

- the idea that Buck and Eddie should only be "gay for each other" and no one else.

(these talking points still get repeated and if anything they have gotten more hateful the more time has passed).

Buddies insisted that they could've made buddie canon every ep, but that's simply not true, even leaving the GA and network aside, if you watch the show without shipping goggles you'll realize how much work they'll need to write that arc for Eddie as well, and if you care about queer rep you would want him to have his arc too, right?

they also claimed that his religious guilt is "clearly tied to queerness" when in reality Eddie is one of the most stagnant characters in the show as his religious guilt is tied to his inability to secure a "traditional family unit" and be the "man of the house" he was told to be. He drove Shannon away (something he admitted), then lost her forever and hasn't been able to move on for 6 seasons. It all circles back to that guilt about Shannon, the expectations put on him and his feelings of failing her, his parents, his kid and himself. Could there be an space for queerness too? Sure, but that's not what the show has portrayed at all so far.

the heavy mischaracterization of Eddie, the choice to strip him away from all his flaws or excuse them, the character assassination and malicious reading of Tommy while engaging in homophobia, their inability to allow Buck to be his own character with his queerness having nothing to do with Eddie and the desire to have him play into negative stereotypes told me everything I needed to know about where these people who want to gaslight you into thinking that "gay Eddie and buddie is the only correct answer" actually stand when it comes to queer rep.

it is not inherently wrong to find relatability in Eddie as a queer person and read him as such, but it is incredibly dishonest to claim that's the only valid way to read him.

in the end, I should find Eddie more relatable as a character and truth be told? I do, but I find Ryan's desire to tell a story about men being vulnerable, emotionally open and close without having to question their sexuality or masculinity far more realistic and honest for the character and Ryan himself.

[epicbuddieficrecs]

Weekly Recap | August 19th-25th 2024

Have a wonderful week! I hope you enjoy this rec!

Complete

don't let go by honestlydarkprincess/ @honestlydarkprincess (Getting Together | <1K | Teen): Buck and Eddie get home after a long shift and decide to take a nap. for the prompt: accidental pet names

in the crystalline knowledge of you by bleakmonday/ @bleakmonday-writes (Post-BuckTommy Break-Up, Love Confessions | 1,5K | Teen): Eddie barges in and tells Buck how he feels and they cry about it. That's it, that's the fic.

Come on Sweetheart, Let's Adore One Another by giselleslash/ @gigi-gigi (Established Buddie, Fluff | 1,6K | Mature): When Buck and Eddie start dating Buck finds out a surprise about Eddie that delights the hell out of him. (or the one where Eddie’s soft, romantic little heart loves being called pet names.)

Shouting Under My Breath by carpediaz/ @sofa-king-lame (Jealous Eddie, Getting Together | 2K | Teen): The one where a guy hits on Buck in a bar and Eddie gets jealous. Turns out, Buck really likes it when Eddie is jealous.

call your girlfriend by bleakmonday/ @bleakmonday-writes (S5, Love Confessions | 2,6K | Teen): Buck is at a loss, so he calls Maddie. “Eddie… told me we were getting married.” The silence is damning. “…You wanna run that by me again?" - Or: When Taylor tells Buck she loves him, Buck tells Eddie about it. And Eddie? Well, he goes right for the jugular.

leave it out there, no regrets by Maira/ @carrierofthepaperclips (Post-S7, Love Confessions | 3K | Teen): Or, the one where Buck is completely oblivious to Eddie declaring his love, and Eddie (briefly) contemplates leaving the country forever because of it.

we'll try and we'll succeed by honestlydarkprincess/ @honestlydarkprincess (Post-S7, Getting Together | 3K | Teen): Buck comes out to Chris and it helps him realize who he wants to be with.

we should make a verbal agreement to only kiss each other by bleakmonday/ @bleakmonday-writes (Secret Marriage | 4K | Teen): “Who the hell did he marry? Everyone he knows works here! He’d have to marry one of us!” The whole room goes still as they process that. “God, could you imagine?” - Five times a member of the 118 imagines being married to Buck, plus one time one of them lives it. (sequel to call your girlfriend)

I Am What I Am Cause You Trained Me by I_still_dont_understand_13/ @dangerpronebuddie (Post-S7 | 5K | Mature): "So it's all my fault Christopher’s first instinct is to run?" Eddie protests. “And Shannon's?” "Eddie, you enlisted," Helena says gently, but there's nothing gentle about it. "And Shannon ran off to LA," Ramon adds, oh so helpfully. "And I was ten years old when you told me to step up and be the man of the house because you weren't around," Eddie says, jabbing a finger towards Ramon. Ramon does at least look a little guilty about it. Helena, as always, is undeterred. "He was angry at you, Eddie. He needed his space." "Which I was giving him," Eddie hisses. "You didn't have to take him away for him to get a little space or time or whatever he needed." "He asked us to come get him," Helena reasons. Buck, who'd been quiet so far, steps beside Eddie and speaks, his shoulder brushing Eddie's in silent reassurance. "And you didn't think to at least consider trying to mediate first?"

No Regrets by Inell/ @inell (Post-S7, Getting Together, PWP | 5K | Explicit): Buck and Eddie’s relationship changes with an impulsive kiss during a rerun of Chopped. It’s now a few hours later, and Buck wants to make sure that Eddie doesn’t have any regrets.

love is stored in the picnic basket by bucksclipboard/ @excuseme-greentea (Getting Together | 5K | Teen): Buck participates in the 118’s basket bidding on Valentine’s Day and things go exactly as (Bobby) planned. When Eddie is done standing on the sidelines, he makes the grand gesture Buck has been dreaming of. or: buck’s heart (um, picnic basket) is up for auction and eddie is ready to pay

The Way to a Man’s Heart by Inell/ @inell (Post-S7, Getting Together | 5K | Teen): When Eddie texts Buck to ask him over for dinner, Buck thinks something odd is going on, but nothing prepares him for what Eddie has planned.

the best of me (are just the pieces of the best of you) by justhockey (Post-S7, Getting Together | 6K | General): It was a slow, aching, gruelling process, like re-breaking every one of your bones just to set them back in the right place. But Buck got to watch as Eddie slowly came back to life. There’d still been the whole moustache debacle, though. Which, thankfully, hadn’t lasted beyond the first facetime call with Chris, where he’d actually hung up in disgust and texted Eddie a single sentence: get rid of it. They don’t talk about that brief lapse in judgment anymore.

wanna do a bad thing twice by coldbam/ @coldbam (Cheating Buck, Buddie Endgame | 7K | Explicit): Eddie gets another new friend. History repeats itself.

this could be the year for the real thing by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, Maddie/Chimney | 8K | Teen): It's December, 2016 and Chimney is a bit down on his luck. But a chance meeting with Beverly Hills heiress Maddie Buckley, right before her parents' big annual New Year's party, might be just what he's looking for. OR a Madney Cinderella AU.

the kiss that lingers by greenbergsays/ @greenbergsays (Getting Together | 10K | Explicit): 5 times Eddie kisses Buck's birthmark & 1 time he doesn't.

🔥the best endeavor waiting by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, Amputee!Buck | 12K | Mature): When quarantine puts the 118 on the front lines of the pandemic, Eddie asks Buck and his service dog, Cranberry, to stay with Christopher. (Part 2 of Buck & Cranberry)

Vary My Days by Chash/ @ponyregrets (Post-S7 | 12K | Teen): After Christopher leaves, Frank tells Eddie to get a hobby. Eddie picks Legos, Buck picks crochet, and they both wait for Chris to talk to them again.

Can You Open Up The Door? by fruitsdoesnotknow/ @tayf-ghost (Canon Divergent, Different First Meeting | 15K | Teen): Or, five times Abuela and Pepa try to matchmake probationary firefighter Buck with freshly single dad Eddie moving to Los Angeles, and the one time they don't need to do anything at all.

🔥I'm Hearing Secret Harmonies by Chash/ @ponyregrets (Canon Divergent, Witch Eddie, Coffeshop AU | 18K | Teen): When the firefighter walks into Eddie's coffeeshop, Eddie immediately knows two things about him: he's not human, and he's the love of Eddie's life. Oh, he knows a bunch of other things too, obviously. He's about thirty, a few months younger than Eddie himself. He has a scar on his throat, like he got stabbed there, and one of his legs has some metal rods in it that must have come from a bad injury. The guy doesn't know he's not human, which is a tricky thing to figure out, but Eddie's almost positive. Most of the non-humans he knows have always known they aren't people, but there are exceptions, and they tend to carry themselves differently. The firefighter moves like he knows he doesn't belong, but not like he knows why. Like he's afraid of taking up space, afraid of being noticed. As if Eddie is even capable of not noticing him.

🔥 you're almost home (i've been waiting for you to come in) by sibylsleaves/ @sibylsleaves (Post-S5, Canon Divergent - Roommates, Getting Together | 34K | Mature): Buck moves in. Eddie comes out. Things get a little messy.

🔥I used to watch the moon retreat and wonder where it goes by Chash/ @ponyregrets (Canon Divergent, Ghost Whisperer Buck | 43K | Teen): Here's what Evan believes: if someone can do something that other people can't, if they offer some unique and special service to the world, they should do that. They have an obligation to use whatever skills they have, ideally to help people. It's just the right thing to do. And the one thing that Evan can do that almost no one else can is see ghosts. (The 118 are on a ghost-hunting TV show. Buck's the only one who knows ghosts are real.)

WIP

🔥Where there's smoke by rainbow_nerds/ @rainbow-nerdss (Multiverses | 25/31 | 30K | Teen): His eyelids are heavy. His lungs ache. The smoke is dense and thick, slowly suffocating him. Eddie feels himself drift as Buck’s voice penetrates the smoke, cuts through the fog in his brain. “Eddie, stay with me. Stay with me, Eds.” Eddie wants to stay. He wants to open his eyes and see Buck. He doesn’t want to leave. But he’s so tired, and sleep is calling him. Maybe it will be okay. Maybe his dreams will be sweet. Maybe there’ll be peace, there. And maybe, if he just rests for a little while, he’ll be able to find his way back.

🔥 Any Other Way by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon Divergent, S2 | 17/21 | 84K | Mature): In a switcheroo alternate universe, Buck spends young adulthood in the military, while Eddie, who has no idea Christopher exists, spends his twenties messing around, finally enjoying freedom away from his family’s expectations. When they both end up in Los Angeles, at the 118, some things are different, and others will be the same in any universe.

🔥 Long Death by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Post-S7, Vampire AU | 14/15 | 68K | Explicit): In the summer of 2024, a never before seen form of vampirism breaks out in Los Angeles. Just as Eddie is about to get his son back. Six months later, Buck's life is permanently changed.

go and kill, go and die by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Zombie Apocalypse AU | 3/14 | 12K | Mature): The 118 are a group of survivors in a small California town in the wake of a zombie apocalypse. For months they've been isolated and safe. But the arrival of some new players, the search for some missing loved ones, will shake everything up and put their little team in jeopardy.

🔥 Things We're All Too Young to Know by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Canon S1-S6, Divergent Post-S6 | 134/? | 425K | Mature): This is a love story. Even if it doesn’t always look like it. Even if it doesn’t always feel like it. A look back on Eddie and Buck's lives up to now, and what led them to each other, interpreted from the current 9-1-1 canon.

Weary Memory by Daisies_and_Briars/ @cal-daisies-and-briars (Buck&Bobby, Post-S7 | 3/4 | 9K | Teen): After an argument about the circumstances of Bobby's sudden retirement, Buck and Bobby each find themselves inexplicably experiencing one of the other's difficult childhood memories.

Podfic

🔥[podfic] i'm not good with names (and you don't feel the same) by be_brave13/ @djemsowhat // fic by benwvatt/ @benwvatt (S7E7: Ghost of a Second Chance | 10-20min | Teen): Whatever you do, don’t think about her, Shannon, six feet under, carnations at her grave. And don’t think about Buck, ever-changing, sleeping on your couch at home, hands folding over faded towels ‘cause he’s doing your laundry without you asking and fingers tracing down your books, copies left over from high school; eyes roving over your body in locked-away dreams that you don’t discuss, not even at therapy; lips that haven’t ever touched you but lips that know the touch of another ー another man ー just don’t think about it. Or: Eddie goes on his date with Kim and totally, absolutely, does not pine after Shannon or Buck the entire time. (Mission failed.)