#love ireland ben men relationships poly mono thoughts relationships new beginning firstmeeting whenwefirstmet friends goals

[violetrhapsody-blog]

Ben....

A majestic, beautiful and honest man who seemed to vaporise from my dreams and come into reality out of nowhere.

Irish.

Long hair.

Gorgeous eyes.

Tall.

Good build.

Wicked smile.

Uncanny ability to read me and know when something is going on from the very first time we met.

I was introduced to Ben only three months ago, yet he seems to know me more than most people on this planet and he has made the biggest impact to my life in all the right ways in such a short space of time.

He has made me realise that there are many things in my life and past with men and how I view relationships that are just completely.....well, fucked for lack of a better term.

I digress, how I met him.

A friend in work, a new friend but someone who is like my sister with the amount of love I have for her, messaged me one night after a rather frank discussion in work about what my ideal man was.

“...I dunno *clicks to switch into aftercall* maybe just a guy who doesn’t lie and cheat and break my heart.......no? Stop scowling at me........ok, ok....let me think *sifts through some work documents while thinking* Long hair, tall, kinky, geeky, something to do with computers and larp, gamer, sensitive, can cook, gives foot rubs, kind, understanding, wants to get to know me, doesnt just want sex, will spend time with me watching trash movies on the sofa.......and irish! He has to be Irish! That right there is my dream man”

She smiled.

I thought nothing more of it.

Few weeks later after many discussions between us about the men we were both seeing, partners, friends with benefits and play partners in the kink world, she messages me one night...

“Ben cooks and does foot rubs you know on command”

"Really? Can I borrow him from you for a night?”

“You would need to ask him...”

“ummm really?”

“Yea, just message him randomly with ‘so I hear you give foot rubs and cook on command’ and see what he says”

*finds him on FB, sends message*

2 days later.....

“I guess you know *blah* then?” from Ben....and that is where it started.

We chatted, we got on, he seemed cute, I seemed drawn to him the same way I had many other men since being unexpectedly single since last October.

But something was different.

We arranged to meet up for a drink in a coffee shop 2 weeks later.

Something happened one week later and we were both free at the same time....it was late at night and we were messaging...somehow we both ended up eluding to him coming to my house for the first time we were meeting which was totally different for me.

He has a wife. He is poly.

His wife knew and was ok with it to a point.

We had already spoken about the possibility of play.

First day here and when he first walked through the door I was shocked at how stunning he was.

Beautiful long hair to his ass, amazing deep eyes I could get lost in, amazing ass...wicked smile and an accent I couldn’t place.

We chatted and settled into each others company.

We talked openly, honestly and bluntly about play sessions, history, hang ups and what we each wanted.

He even let me braid his hair.

He sat down on the dining chair and I braided his hair while chatting.

I asked him where his accent was from because I couldnt place it.

He smiled at me looking up cheekily in the mirror in front of him that I had forgotten about...

“If you cannot guess by the time you are done with my hair, I will tell you”.

I guessed everything from American, welsh, English and everything in-between.

“Are you done with my hair yet?”

“Yea, I cannot guess, where the hell are you from?”

He got up, turned around, walked upto me, put his right hand on the right hand side of my face, leaned in slowly and whispered in my right ear, “I’m from Ireland, love” in a full Irish accent.

My eyes lit up, I was shocked, I was horrified and I was excited all at once. Simultaneously all of my damn dreams were embodied in front of me in one man, a real man, standing in front of me who was interested in me.

He found my reaction both amusing and confusing I think, I know he was definitely amused by it. It still makes him chuckle a few months on.

Chloe had forced me towards him knowing full well the light and love he would bring to my life as he did to hers...the joy of being poly!

I adore him and he is teaching me to be true to myself, finally, at the age of 33, he is teaching me and giving me the space to learn about myself.

He has taken my thinking that has been reinforced since I was 18 and has turned it on its head.

There will be a lot more writings about Ben in this journal.

There have been so many things that I never want to forget about the time I am spending with him.

...I just wish he weren’t married.