#looks like a cinnamon role and is a cinnamon role for about 80% of the time

[playertwotails]

I really like the idea that Tails is waaaaay more mentally unhinged than everyone but Sonic is aware of and even he gets caught off guard sometimes.

Like in a "if Tails wasn't so sweet and nice he might actually be the most dangerous villain that makes Eggman look like a cakewalk" (hello Sonic Prime that I need to finish but has basically this idea from what I know)

I just like the idea of Tails dropping facts and info that has the rest of the group doing a double take like "...Huh??!!!!"

Shadow or someone: "We need to take [villain of the week] down"

Tails casually: "Okay their vital organs are here, here and here. We can also hit them psychologically with this information I just found out 10 mins ago while researching in the middle of the fight. Also here's the weapons I made specifically for this at that same time."

Everyone else softly: "....what the fuck"

Like let him just casually drop the most unhinged facts, info, and gadgets that sometimes even has Sonic like "..Do we need to have a heart to heart??? You good????"

He's has like a switch that goes from "baby boy baby" to "oh he actually a little fucked up huh."

He's the embodiment of "He will never start a fight but he sure as hell will end it."

[anluz]

ok i have many thoughts about this season SO i will write them here, home it makes sense.

no formating, we die lie [CENSORED]

Some blanket statements about the season at all.

GOOD.

-The comedy is on point. The show jokes hit much better and harder this season. -Some scenes really are well framed. (aka the spitfire episode. holy shit)

BAD

The maltos are much more ‘battle thirsty’

The autobots are useless now

the flattening of the decepticons

Episode 1

Ok, so we are starting in the media res of the new conflict. slightly disappointed but don’t mind it that much.

What I DO MIND is the shift the maltos had about the whole Autobot-decepticon situation on Earth.

Like, correct me if I'm wrong, but the MALTOS were fighting in order to have their new family members not taken away, yes? to live on earth in peace? 

Why do THEY have to retrieve the emberstone shards? Why do THEM have to sacrifice both their safety and their time developing as well adjusted people (in the case of Mo and robbie) FIGHTING WITH WAR VETERANS?? 

WHILE THE AUTOBOTS

ARE

RIGHT

THERE

“oh but anna its a children show, of course it needed to have some action with the kids”

ok.

but how come there's not ONE autobot with them on the mission? its more in the autobots best intinterest  to keep the decepticons away from that fucking stone.

also good fucking job just ASSUMING the new terrans are evil from the get go. just from ONE fight where (where the terran in question was created. and theres a whole thing about the emberstone creating live in accord of the needs of the moment).

Aftermath is funny. i can give him that,

EPISODE TWO.

Not much to say.

its was good.

I am a sucker for the joke `dangerous individual tries to kill cinnamon roll, and cinnamon roll doesn't notice it/luck makes all the harm deflect on them” so i had a good time on that.

The `mosey` subplot was weak. it needed more build up and that annoyed me.

hOW NOBODY FOUND THOSE RUINS BEFORE THERE'S A BIG ASS HOLE LOOKING RIGHT AT THE MIDDLE OF THOSE RUINS COME ON. Don't even talk about drones (probably ghost emps against any of that for a long time) but how not ONE living person stumbled upon that???)

its was ok. 7/10

EPISODE 3

It was ok. Hashtag plot about `choosing` was ok. nothing special.

Hashtag and shockwave fight was pretty fucking awesome, as ravage escape.

I also love that shockwave optic gets redder as he gets angrier.

EPISODE 4

i didnt liked the idea of `human villains` before but…in a world where cybertronian tech exists since the 80`s, it surprised me there aint more people using that and committing to some gimmick for the shits and giggles.

said that…

swindle???

your whole thing is BEING A WEAPON SALESMAN. A CON ARTIST.

HOW DID YOU LET YOUR COOL SLIP YOU SO BAD????

WHY ARE YOU NOT BACK THERE TRYING TO GET THAT FUCKING STONE WITH FORCE??? WHAT???

also…didnt the ‘humans and terrans feel eachother emotions’ thing went away after the second batch of terrans came about?

Also yayy weird al

who care about the fusing gimmick. sure.

6/10

Episode 5

I like that wheeljack points out that this fucking and the enigma of combination are two different things.

Jawbreaker was…kinda annoying in this ep? i guess…it could roll in the sense that JB is excited to meet a possible new friend/family member and he wants to make a good first impression but….

Still very annoying.

we could have explored more about why aftermath is so angry all the time or why jb is always so careful and peaceful all the time APART from when he is in his alt mode!

there could be a thing there, but the JB partakes in some destruction seems more like a child not knowing any better than possibly something he bottles up in the daily.

also??i get the others are excited for the fusion thing  but JAWBREAKER IS GONE FOR A WHOLE DAY? MAYBE CHECK ON YOUR BROTHER?

EPISODE 6

the  shot composition in this fucking episode are CRAZY HOLY SHIT

Twitch going more on her ‘leader’ role. nice.

why…how the shard is just…lying there?

I like spitfire, and i think it makes sense for her to be a literal `evil twitch` as if, what if twitch didnt had a moral compass

now the thing that FUCKING ANNOYED ME

WHY,

WHY ARE YOU GUYS EVEN ENTERTAINING THE IDEA OF GIVING THIS NEW BOT. A BOT YOU DONT KNOW. A BOT SAID TO BE BORN THAT VERY DAY. A FUCKING IMPORTANT MISSION?????

Op Elita and Megs should have shut that shit down rigth there! there should have been a `sorry spitfire. i dont doubt your prowess, but twitch knows more of our MO but now. with some training i bet you will be taking a mission like this one in no time”

SHE STILL CAN BE FURIOUS

SHE STILL CAN CHALLENGE TWITCH TO A OBSTACLE COURSE

WHY DID YOU GUYS HAD TO DRESS UP AS A STUPID CYBERTRONIAN PRIDE THING???? MAKES NO SENSE

it was funny? yes. i loved the race per se. but?? the WHY? they are doing it?? stupid.

(((what if alex won the fucking race then Megatron?? Would you guys go through with it?? huh??? fuck off. ALSO WHY SIR. WHY ARE YOU WITH YOUR DECEPTICON BADGE? SHOULDNT YOU BE W AN AUTOBOT ONE? OF FUCKING NONE AT ALL?????))

EPISODE 7

Sure. ok. mind swap episode. sure

ngl it was rlly cute seeing aftermath consider Spitfire his true sister

i appreciate hardtop only arm getting fucking jacked (i bet he cant *afford* a new one because OF COURSE swindle your charge him lol)

ravage lil energon bowl (also…is energon solid? do they it in in chunks AND liquid? hmn)

i like the `bravado fight` with the seekers…i think it legit would have worked a bit if she did that towards skywarp of nova storm first lol

it was an ok episode. 

EPISODE 8

It was fun. zero substance.

since WHEN robbie likes optimus prime that much??? they always acted ok to neutral with him in s1

but sure. ok. serviceable.

EPISODE 9 AND 10

oh? do those kids GO to school? you could have fooled me.

i liked the slight ptsd/anxiety of hashtag in the cave.

more `chaos terrans` sibling moment. cute

(the first time watching i though it was unicron. happy it wasent)

to be fair with the quintessons i ALSO would be very mad if my god created me with the purpose of ‘helping’ (whatever this may entail) a race i never saw in my life, and discovered they did that with many many others.

hey shockwave? maybe if you had a problem w the plan maybe you should have SAID something? or made your counterplans? why wait the HOUR before the plan was going to be put in action to say anything?

also…how…is the titan bring a new cybertron to earth? Is he going to metalform the planet? is it a ship? is it just a `big gun` so you could threaten the USA and control earth somehow??

also, glad to see they ‘tried’ coming back to cybertron but couldnt figure how (yet)

this marks the point where….the dialogue gets really cheesy…unbearable cheesy and cliche ..ugh (when starscream has alex as a hostage)

im should have been happier that mo, hashtag and trash are the team for the last fight…they are my favorite maltos..ugh

i feel like there should be a more angry/emotional shouting match w hashtag and starscream…srlys

ah yes. the part where starscream kills the kids…honestly? in character. He always was `the end justify the means’ (unless his 2 brain cells are rubbing together and he thinks in a more long term form) and killing two brats that their main traits was destroying stuff and being a prideful lil shit? yeah. nothing to star to form attachments there.

he would NEVER take the ‘you are more cruel than megatron ever was’

not THIS starscream.

unless they try handwave it with `he was larping as villain so he could get through the plan he thought would legit help the decepticons’ but im not holding my breath on that.

oh wow, starscream going crazy with power again, who would though.

im really getting tired of this. 

more chest fucking dialogue

ARE ALL THE DECEPTICONS LOCKED UP AGAIN, THIS TIME WITHOUT ENERGON????? FUCK. I CANNOT BELIEVE WE ARE BACK TO FUCKING SQUARE ONE.

YES JUST HELP TERATRONUS. THE PERSON YOU JUST MET AND TALKED FOR LESS THAN A HOUR. 

fuck i'm upset.

i wish s1 didnt happened so i just could have this be another actiony-humor tf cartoon and not give me hope for something more.

[wyvernvoneldritch]

Kickin off 2024 late but finally got a first post in lmao 💀

So Nightmare’s redesign is finally here! Bonifacia’s coming soon!

Meet Nightmare, an ancient cousin to the Primal Symbiote. She’s 11ft in height, weighs 725 pounds, can run at 50mph, and can lift about 93 tons.

Age: 200-something billion years.

Likes: Dark chocolate, cuddles, 1950s-80s music, bacon, sushi, Mexican food.

Dislikes: fireworks, people, death metal, caffeine, pickles, subway trains, elevators

VC: Lorraine Toussaint as Shadow Weaver

Prn: She/They

Personality Type: ESFP

Nightmare is witty, enthusiastic, loyal, versatile, realistic, playful, caring, overprotective and has a somewhat sexually dark sense of humor.

They look like they could kill you (and in all fairness she can), but she’s really just a cinnamon roll. Loves nothing more than being able to just sit and eat a shit ton of sushi and dark chocolate while listening to Ella Fitzgerald’s biggest hits on the radio.

⚠️ DO NOT use the art or characters without permission

⛔️ NO tracing, NO reposting

⛔️ NO shifting, NO role playing

[eccogirl]

I just need a second to rant, feel free to ignore me and/or join in on my insanity.

Ok so random thought

As many of you all may have noticed over the last few months, the internet has collectively lost their minds when it comes to Stranger Things. I myself have found myself latching on to the series this season like never before and I honestly think it’s because my previous hyper fixation, Supernatural, had finally closed the last chapter(even as unsatisfactory as it was). Though I was looking forward to the new prequel series coming out, I knew it would never consume my little fangirl heart the same way. Enter in Stranger Things season 4. I was not prepared. Where do they get off giving us Eddie Munson in all his sweet cinnamon roll glory and then rip him away like that in just a few short episodes, how dare they give us lines like “For your modesty” and “Harrington's got her, don’t ya Big Boy” and then shatter our hearts all over the Upside Down like that.

Again I would like to say that this is just me trying to take the jumble of thoughts in my head into something a bit more concrete lol

I would like to propose this thought:

Eddie Munson is just Dean Winchester if Dean never had a little brother, never got uprooted every few days, and a heck of a lot less monster hunting!

These cocky little shits have been driving me nuts and i just think others need to see it too.

Like, I have a checklist! Let’s get the most obvious bits out of the way:

these two are not that terrible far apart in age, both would have been kids in the late 70s and early 80’s, though I do believe Eddie is older🤔

Musical taste is very similar and they are very passionate about it, Dean would have lost his mind over Eddies Master of Puppets solo

Eddie would have wept over Deans car in envy and Dean would have handled Eddies guitar with reverence.

It is shown on many occasions that Dean is a total closet nerd, if it wasn’t for the fact that he hunts real monsters on a daily basis he would have been all over DnD, you see it in the LARPing episode, Dean is nearly giddy when he gets to dress up and role play like the big ol’dork he never got to be as a kid. You see it in his love for Game of Thrones, in his love for both classic literature and his homemade ghost hunting equipment.

Two words DADDY ISSUES

Eddie and Dean collected strays like Pokémon cards

They love their little big brained brother's

they would literally die for them... (this one hurt)

They have a father figure thats always been there for them

This last bit I'm just gonna leave here 😉lol

is it just me? does anybody else see these assbutts?! this has been living rent free in my head for months! Also the level of Steddie brain rott hell i have been living in for the last 5 months has only ever been rivaled by my Destiel and Sterek binges

Thank you for coming to my TED Talk...I'm sorry 😅

[alt-rose]

21 - colson baker

colson baker imagine

21 - Pete Davidson takes you out to celebrate your 21st birthday after SNL, and you make a new friend. 

“this week a midwestern teenager was arrested for kidnapping livestock and hiding them in their neighbor’s garages. here to comment is our resident young person, (y/n) (y/l/n).”

you took a quick breath before you were pushed toward the weekend update desk. you rolled to a stop next to your castmate Michael Che before you dove into your bit with him about cows and the midwestern community.

you made your SNL debut last season when you were only nineteen. you quickly took over Pete Davidson’s former role as the “resident young person” among the cast, and you had formed a fast friendship with him over the last year and a half. he had been eager to take you out with his friends so that you could experience the true nightlife that New York could offer, and now that you were finally turning 21, he could do just that.

after you exited the stage from your weekend update skit, Pete caught you in the hallway as you headed back to your dressing room to get ready for your last skit.

“hey, next weekend,” Pete started catching your attention. “do you want to go out and celebrate your birthday? Maybe get shitfaced?”

“I don’t know. who’s gonna be there? I don’t really want to feel obligated to entertain people while you’re getting me drunk,” you said apprehensively.

“don’t worry. it’ll be a bunch of people you don’t know so you don’t have to worry about anything other than getting drunk. I’ll keep an eye on you, of course. keep you away from the creepos.”

“how thoughtful,” you say throwing yourself into one of the hair and make-up chairs. “but sure, it sounds fun.”

“great. I’ll get the party lined up for next Saturday after the show.”

you threw him a thumbs up before your attention was directed toward the make-up artist giving you an 80s look for your next skit.

--

“this week our very own (y/n) (y/l/n) turned 21. here to comment on finally becoming an adult is our resident young person, (y/n) (y/l/n).”

“hey Colin,” you call back to him when you roll up next to Colin Jost at the weekend update desk.

SNL did a similar skit when Pete turned 21 so the writers felt it was only right to do one for you.

“hey (y/n), how does it feel to finally be 21?” he asked tapping his pen on his desk.

“it feels great Colin. you know, it’s a bit of an adjustment, but I’m having a great time.”

“right, you’re finally legal now. you can do adult things.”

“yeah, now I can buy tropical fish at Randy’s Pet Shop by my apartment building. I have a fish named Chet now. he’s pretty cool.”

“wait, you have to be 21 to buy fish from Randy’s Pet Shop?”

“yeah, Randy’s got this weird thing,” you paused to make eye contact with Colin. “anyway, besides that, I don’t really feel like much of an adult, Colin. I’m like five-foot-something and still resemble a fourth grader. like look at me, Colin. I was given a kid’s menu at TGI F.R.I.D.A.Y.’S last week. I am not an adult.”

Colin laughed before looking at you. “(y/n), you really don’t think that you’ve grown in this past year? you haven’t felt like an adult in anyway?”

“no.”

“well, I think you have. you stopped ordering chicken fingers at every restaurant we go to for cast dinners. I think that’s a big step into adulthood.”

“yeah, well, joke’s on you because I have a bag of dino nuggies hidden in the back of the breakroom fridge.”

“what?”

“yeah, I just take a few out and wrapping them in tinfoil and heat them up in the microwave for four minutes-”

“wait, hold on, hold on,” Colin laughed waving his hand to stop you. “you put the nuggets in tinfoil before you put them in the microwave?”

“yeah, you just wrap them up in the tinfoil, and they cook really well. they get all sparky and stuff. they taste a little smokey though”

“you’re the reason why the breakroom microwave is always broken?”

“what?”

“(y/n), you’re not supposed to put tinfoil in the microwave,” Michael chimes in.

“you can’t put metal in the microwave. did you not know that?” Colin asked.

“what?” you put on the confused act.

“(y/n) (y/l/n), everybody,” Colin shouts turning to the audience and ending your segment on the update.

“who let me be an adult?” you laugh shouting to audience as Colin pulls you into a side hug. the crowd cheers as you wave to them.

“for weekend update, I’m Colin Jost.”

“And I’m Michael Che. GOODNIGHT.”

you continue to smile and laugh with both of the guys as the camera panned away from the stage and the recording light turned off. when you made it off stage, you started to head back to your dressing room. you had finished your last sketch of the night, so you planned on getting ready for your night out with Pete and whoever else he invited.

--

an hour later, you were crammed in the backseat of an uber next to Pete.

“where are we going?” you asked him as you check the battery on your phone.

“this club a few minutes away. it’s pretty lowkey. everyone’s going to meet us there.”

“okay, sounds good-”

“it’s actually right here,” he interrupts stopping the driver. “thanks, man.”

Pete opened the door of the car and climbed out. his lanky form towered over the small sedan. he leaned down to help you scoot over to open door. you took his hand as you scooted over to the door before sliding out of the car as best as you could in your mini skirt.

after both of your feet successfully hit the pavement, you adjusted your black leather mini skirt from riding up before you fixed you black turtleneck to make sure that it was still tucked into your skirt.

“ready?”

“yeah, let’s go.”

--

after making it past the bouncer, Pete led you over to the bar before dropping you off at a bar stool. you watched as he made his rounds saying hi to everyone. it was almost 1 am now. you began to wonder how late you were going to be out tonight.

you suddenly felt two hands on your shoulders causing you to slightly jump.

“you ready for your birthday drink?” Pete shouted in your ear.

“yeah, let’s do it,” you laugh turning to look at him.

“can we get four shots of Fireball?” he shouted to the bartender.

“four?” you shout over your shoulder at him. “I though you weren’t drinking.”

“I’m not. you are. you’re downing all of those.”

“oh god.”

he slapped his hands on your shoulders once more. “you got this, baby.”

the bartender placed the shots in front of you as Pete opened a tab.

“we doing this?” you asked staring at the shots.

“let’s do it.”

you grab your first shot before raising it as a cheers to him. you brought it to your lips and downed it. you felt it burn as it slid down your throat. you squeezed your eyes shut as you finished it.

“that was strong,” you cough.

“next one.”

you down the second one, and then the third one shortly followed. the cinnamon flavor left a burning sensation in your throat.

“last one, last one.” Pete shook your shoulders cheering you on.

“fuck this.” you downed the last one.

--

an hour into your party, it was clear to you that you were feeling very drunk. you had spent the last hour dancing with strangers on the dance floor before slipping back to the VIP section Pete had for you and some of the people at the party. after your first couple shots, he had introduced you to a few people, but at this point, you can’t remember your own name so how could you be expected to remember theirs.

you’re currently sipping on a tequila sunrise now that Pete decided that you handled enough straight liquor. you were slightly leaning on Pete as he stood next to you while you were sitting on one of the barstools for the high tabletops.

“yoooo,” you heard someone call as they approached your table. “dude, whassup.”

Pete leaned over to bro-hug someone before that person began to lean on your table next to Pete. you could hear their muffled conversation as you played with the straw in your drink.

“so what’s this party for anyway?”

“it’s a birthday party,” Pete yelled over the music.

“who’s birthday?”

“hers,” Pete said motioning to you causing you to look up at Pete and his friend. “this is my castmate, (y/n). she just turned 21 so we’re celebrating.”

your eyes met the stranger’s, and you smiled. he was pretty with his bleached-out hair. you gave him a small wave.

“I’m Colson,” he said extending his hand to yours.

“(y/n),” you said taking his hand.

“can I buy a drink for the birthday girl?” he asked flashing you a smile.

“sure,” you said before taking the last sip of your tequila sunrise.

when he brought you back a drink, you stood over your shoulder placing the drink in front of you.

“let’s fucking party.”

“okay,” you shouted before knocking back the drink and taking his hand to lead you to the dance floor.

--

you spent the rest of the night with a set of hands planted firmly around your waist. when you had finally had enough of drinking and dancing, you made your way back over to the VIP section with your six-foot shadow following behind you with his hands still on your hips.

“I’m tired,” you say to Pete as you approach your seat the table. your shadow rested against your back as you hopped up onto the barstool.

“do you want to head home?” Pete asked leaning close to you and your shadow, Colson.

“kinda,” you said leaning your head back on Colson. your drunken state couldn’t careless that you were practically laying against a total stranger.

“do you even have a place to stay tonight?” Pete asked Colson as he looked up from you to the tall guy behind you.

“not really. I could just get a hotel,” you could hear Colson tell Pete.

“you guys can just crash at my apartment. I have a couch and a guest bedroom,” you interrupt as you stare off into space.

“are you sure?” Pete asked.

“yeah, let’s just go home.”

“cool with you?” Pete asked Colson.

“I’m cool,” Colson answered.

10 minutes later, the three of you were sitting in the backseat of a black car, which you assumed was an uber. you head rested against someone’s shoulder as you began to close your eyes.

--

you felt someone jostle you awake. you opened your eyes to find that the uber had parked in front of your building. Pete was leaning in the car once more to help you out. you blinked the sleep out of your eyes as you took his hands. he helped you out of the car just as he had when you got to the club. you felt a pair of hands gently adjust your skirt, and you whipped your head around to find Colson standing behind of you.

“your skirt was riding up, baby,” he said to you while he tapped your hip.

“thanks,” you murmur.

you slapped your keys into Pete’s hand as he went to buzz you in with your code to the building. you began to walk to the door with Colson resting his arm around your shoulder. he kept you walking upright as you both entered the building. you took the elevator up 12 floors.

when you finally stepped foot into your apartment, you stood in the doorway and ripped your heeled boots from your feet. Pete dropped your keys into the bowl by your door, and Colson closed the door behind the three of you.

you turned around to the both of them, almost tripping over your own feet.

“kitchen,” you said pointing to the kitchen, “couch,” pointing to the living room, “guest room,” pointing to the guest room, “bathroom,” you pointed to the bathroom door. “there’s extra blankets in the closet,” you said pointing to the small closet by the bathroom. “help yourself to anything. I’m going to sleep.” you gave them a salute before turning around to your bedroom.

they laughed lightly as you slammed the door behind you.

as you stumbled into your room, you plugged your phone into the charger on your nightstand. after your phone was charging, you slipped your skirt and turtleneck off before slipping on an oversized t-shirt. you quickly wiped off your makeup before falling face down in your bed.

--

the next morning, you woke up with blurry eyes and a fog in your head. you blinked a couple times before rolling over to fall back asleep. you had your eyes closed as you tried to fall back asleep.

that’s when you heard a crash in the kitchen.

you whipped yourself out of bed, and you grabbed the baseball bat from under your bed. you took a deep breath before throwing your bedroom door open. with your bat raised, you lunged out of your bedroom at the intruder.

instead of the intruders, you found Pete and some guy standing in your kitchen messing with your pots and pans.

“jesus fucking christ, Pete, what the fuck?”

“oh, sleeping beauty’s up,” the guy called waving his arms out to you with your skillet and spatula in his hands.

“who is this? and what the fuck are you doing?” you shout annoyed at Pete.

“This is Colson, my friend who you met last night, but guessing from your reaction, you don’t remember much. you let us stay over, and now we are making breakfast,” he said before going back to whatever he was doing.

you felt Colson’s gaze on you. you dropped your bat on your shoulder as you met his stare. you glared into his eyes as he intensely stared back into yours.

“nice bat,” he said still staring.

“thanks, I played softball,” you glared back. “I’m gonna go put some clothes on.”

“you don’t have to,” you heard Colson call back to you as he watched you retreat to your room. from your room, you could hear Pete yell at him in the kitchen.

you laughed lightly as you threw on a pair of sweatpants and put a bra on under your oversized shirt. you took a scrunchie and threw your hair up before heading back to the kitchen.

you plopped yourself down on one of the counter stools in your kitchen.

“what are we eating?” you ask the guys.

“I’m attempting to make pancakes with whatever you have,” Colson called back to you.

“fantastic,” you reply.

“how’s your head?” Pete asked from his spot at the counter.

“it’s not bad. I don’t feel very hungover,” you replied.

“that’s surprising seeing how much you drank last night.”

“what even happened last night?”

“you drank a lot. you danced a lot. then, Colson showed up. then, you drank and danced some more with him.”

“wow,” you mutter staring off into space before you felt Colson staring at you again. you met his eyes before speaking up, “I apologize for that and whatever I did.”

“I didn’t mind,” he said before flipping a pancake.

“it was so funny. you were like one of those velcro monkeys wrapped around him all night,” Pete laughed.

“don’t make fun of me,” you yelled before whacking Pete with a dish towel on the counter. “you’re the one who got me drunk.” they both laughed before you looked up at Colson once more. “I am definitely apologizing for that.”

“I don’t mind. I liked being your arm candy for the night,” he said plopping a pancake on a plate.

you rolled your eyes before opening your phone. “what’s the damage? was there any paparazzi last night?”

“weelllllll,” Pete drew out.

“what?” you whine dropping your head a bit.

“there’s a few from when we left the club, and they followed us back to your building so there’s a few from then too. there’s two articles running already.”

“just because we went out for drinks?” you ask motioning between you and Pete.

“no, because we,” Colson motioned between the three of you. “went out for drinks.” he dropped a plate in front of you. “apology pancakes for the tabloids.”

“how thoughtful,” you murmur. “what did the articles say?”

“nothing just speculation,” Pete said taking a drink. “it’ll go away. you just might want to keep away from Colson for a while.”

“you’re kidding,” you said opening your phone before typing your name into safari.

you scrolled through the new section before you found the pictures from last night. in the pictures, Colson had his arm wrapped around your waist as you were shielding your eyes from the flash. you assumed these pictures were from when you left the club. the other pictures were of the guys helping you out of the car. Colson was standing behind you, towering over you with his arm around you. it totally looked like the two of you were a thing with how touchy you two were. you were not a touchy person when you were sober. you could only assume that the alcohol turned you into a velcro monkey as Pete put it. you briefly skimmed the articles only to find that they were speculating that you and Machine Gun Kelly, Colson Baker, were in a relationship.

“Machine Gun Kelly. you’re Machine Gun Kelly?” you ask him, squinting your eyes at Colson.

he and Pete laughed at you.

“I was wondering if you were going to put it together,” Pete laughed. “that took you forever.”

“well, I’m sorry, but I was drunk.”

“you knew I was friends with MGK,” Pete laughed.

“I didn’t think you were going to invite him to my birthday party.”

“so I take it you’re a fan?” Colson said raising an eyebrow at you.

“I’m not actually. I haven’t even heard your stuff. I’m not really into rap,” you said to him.

“ouch. that’s rough,” he sighed.

“sorry,” you shrugged. “thanks for the pancakes though.” you give him a smile before taking a bite.

Pete’s phone buzzed before he got up from his stool.

“shit, I have to go. I have to take my mom to the airport. are you going to be okay if I leave you?” Pete asked staring at you.

“yeah, I’ll be fine. tell your mom hi for me,” you said looking up at him.

“okay, bye kid. happy birthday.” he wrapped his arms around you.

“thanks for getting me drunk. I had fun,” you said patting his arm.

“yeah, I know,” he called back as he headed to your door.

“be safe,” you shouted before he closed your front door, leaving you with Colson in your kitchen.

you and Colson took a pause as you both watched the door. he was the first to break his gaze as he turned to you. you both made eye contact as you both stared at each other.

“so,” you started.

“so,” he replied leaning down on your counter to stare at you at your eye level.

“so.”

“so, what do we do now?”

“we can watch tv, or you can tell me about last night,” you suggest before shoving another bite into your mouth.

you were not bashful when it came to eating, and you were not deterred by Colson staring into your eyes as you chewed, even if he was really pretty.

“what do you want to know?” he said. his gaze never leaving your eyes.

“we seemed very touchy in those photos,” you hummed taking another forkful of pancakes.

“can’t help that your kinda hot.”

“wow,” you scoff leaning back from the counter. “this is hot for you,” you say shoving the pancakes in your mouth.

“very,” he laughed.

you peered an eye up at him, skeptically. you couldn’t tell if he was being serious. there was no way that someone as pretty as he was would be interested in you.

he extended his hand out to you face as your eyes watched it move to your lip. he flicked a piece of pancake from your lip before smiling at you. you heart practically jumped out of its chest.

fuck. you were crushing.

--

the two of you hung out and talked for the next hour. you both flirted a bit back and forth. you felt this undeniable connection to him, and it made you feel sick. you were notorious for running from people and your feelings. you always chickened out before saying anything to them, and then when you finally got the courage to, that person had already found somebody else.

“fuck, I should go,” Colson said throwing his head back on the couch from where the two of you were sitting. “I don’t want to though.”

“I need to shower and get started with some pitches for work tomorrow,” you say lightly placing your head on the back of the couch.

“okay, I’ll go.”

“I’ll walk you down.”

he took your hand in his as he got up from the couch. he pulled you up as he grabbed his jacket from where it was placed on the arm of the couch.

you grabbed your keys before he pulled you out the door. you closed the door behind you before the two of you waited for the elevator.

you laced your fingers with his as you stepped into the elevator. here goes nothing, you breathed.

“I had a lot of fun with you,” you say staring straight at the doors of the elevator.

he turned to you with you fingers still locked with his. “I really like you.”

“cool, cool,” you say as you saw the number on the elevator tick to floor 6. you turn to him. “I should give you my number.”

he slipped you his phone, and you typed your number into his phone before handing back to him.

“cool, cool,” he started as he slipped his phone back into his pocket.

1

2

3

you counted before grabbing the back of his neck and pulling him down to your height. you stood on your tiptoes, and you placed your lips on his. he grabbed your face as he kissed you back.

the elevator dinged as the doors opened. you broke away from him as you shoved him out the doors.

“call me sometime,” you say as you stood alone in the elevator.

“aye aye captain,” he saluted you. he moved back toward the elevator before pulling you back to him. “one more for the road.” he kissed you until you couldn’t breathe.

you finally pulled away for air while he held his hands on your head.

“you’re fucking gorgeous.”

“you’re not too bad yourself. now go so I can work,” you said fully pulling away before the elevator alarm was set off. “Bye Colson,” you said hitting your floor button.

“Bye (y/n),” he waved as the doors shut.

--

as you made your way back to your apartment, your phone dinged.

unknown number: hi velcro monkey

you rolled your eyes as you entered your apartment. this man was going to be the death of you.

.

.

.

first Colson Baker imagine. feel free to send requests. - rose xx

[blushing-starker]

Anon asked for alpha Peter and omega Tony for a baby announcement. Thank you to the wonderful @vaguekiwi for motivating me and sharing her thoughts on the story. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did, anon.

"Tony, Tony? Are you up? It's 7:30am already, you have a meeting with Miss Potts in forty minutes. Tony?"

Soft hands curl into already silver hair, scratching at the strands in an attempt to wake him up gently. Butterfly kisses on a cold nape, a ridiculously hot nose nuzzling everywhere. Peter knows scenting the billionaire is basically the only way one can ensure a calm morning.

Not today. And not for the next few months either.

He loves his husband, appreciates the nearly romantic demeanor, he does. But "unless you have a cup of coffee for me, there is no way in hell i am gonna leave this bed. your child has kept me up with nausea the entire night. I wanna hurl my guts out more than that time Rhodes found Dad's liquor cabinet. please, tell me you have coffee."

"..." Tony is severely displeased by the fact he can read Peter like a book even with half his mind shut off because fine, he's right and dammit all.

"I want that weird drink you make. The one with milk, cinnamon and chunks of brownie. And French toast with waffles. No jam, not too much butter, as much sugar as possible. Now, go before I scream at you for having the only dick that could get a hormone fucked forty something omega pregnant. "

The kid scrambles from bed, practically face plants with all the covers tangling long legs and yup, this is the person that the universe designated as his soulmate. Because Tony Stark can never have a partner with a reasonable, normal amount of enthusiasm, stamina and a sense of balance.

That sounds like he's ungrateful, he's not. But it turns out being three months pregnant gives him plenty of perspective to peer at life in a whole new way that does not include caffeine, alcohol or sex.

Would he kill and die for this amazing human being that makes Tony's heart race no matter the day, that inspires him to be a better version of himself? Yes, no questions asked. No hesitation and no regret.

Would he clobber Peter for doing the impossible and technically causing Tony incredible discomfort on a daily basis thanks to what his doctors can only assume is a superhuman baby he already loves and adores more than life itself? Also yes.

Things aren't mutually exclusive in this household.

Pep, bless her, has yet to find out about their future mini Parker so there's been no respite on the whole 'running a multi billion dollar industry ' thing. And yeah, while it's not exactly easy, he can focus on other things and not fall into a panicky state of mind — because him? A father? Of a super baby? Tony Stark, infamous playboy with a hedonistic streak, a dad?

Just thinking along those lines makes shame and self doubt slither over a metallic plate. Working, dealing with innovative scientists, crafting the new world of tomorrow, guaranteeing the safety of their planet, shapeshifting into a role model, a mentor (for the interns and school kids he visits, not Peter, of course, thank God they left that dynamic ages ago), loyal friend, reluctant errand boy (fuck the assholes in charge of the Accords), great husband, good man, it all distracts a fearful child from thinking, what if I turn into Howard?

"I couldn't find brownies, so cookies it is! Aunt May had a few boxes sent in when I told her work was keeping you on your feet all the time. Said it'd be a good idea to snack along the day in case you—" Peter freezes, tenses with a not-so-narrow back held ramrod straight. Oh, his husband brought him breakfast in bed.

How could he ever think to clobber such a nice, wonderful—

"Your scent is odd."

"Yeah, well fuck you too then."

Five seconds of silence.

"I'm bringing you one cup of coffee and the hormone pills."

" Yup, that's a great idea. "

---------------------------

Tony’s mumbo jumbo with self loathing is firmly put on the back burner after inhaling a delicious breakfast and chugging that one glorious cup of coffee. Until they go to the bathroom and he sees himself in the mirror.

"We gotta tell them."

"You said you wanted to wait a while before saying anything."

Peter strips, ducks into the warm shower, lets out a pleased little sigh and Tony wants to rip his fingernails off. Is it bad, having sex while pregnant? No! The doctors, every single one of them, said it's a perfectly normal thing to do. It'd be bad if they didn't have sex because Tony, thanks to his crazy hormone production, needs the extra attention for his body to understand this is a happy process that shouldn't include sad pheromones or stressed out moments. Will Peter put him out of his misery and allow a quickie in the mornings? No.

"Take more than five minutes in that shower and I'm joining you."

Listen, he grew up in the 80's and 90's, Tony wasn't immune to peer pressure. Did he cave and eventually do so many squat competitions with Rhodey his butt turned into a duck's butt? There's no evidence, he's made sure, but yes. And Starks have always turned out to be beautiful, doesn't matter your gender or age. Finding a companion for the night has never been a problem for anyone in his family tree.

That, and his work as Iron Man has kept him — well, not ripped like Cap, certainly not as lean and (God help him) athletic as Peter, but fit. Sturdy. Firm. Solid. (Peter once muttered the words 'daddy-like' in regards to his body and he nearly choked on water.)

The passage of time has made him a bit slower, dusted once black hair with, as his husband says, stardust and the corners of his eyes now show how much time Tony spends laughing or frowning. All in all, he looks fucking spectacular for his age and experience as a villain-punching-bag. Thing is, he has a belly. A bump. A curve where it was once, well. Less curvy. Is it a problem for Peter? Nope, as acknowledged every time his alpha tackles him if he so much as looks oddly in the mirror. Is it a problem for him? He'll get back to you on that.

The point is, there's a belly when just a few months ago there wasn't such a pronounced belly. It's great, of course. Proof their child is growing steadily and Tony's body is adjusting to it accordingly. A small part of him, the omega part he actually lets live, is fascinated and proud. He's doing that, Tony's the one growing a human being, creating life out of nothing in his own body. That child, although not the only physical embodiment of their relationship, is a result of his love for Peter. Of how much his husband loves him. They love each other so much they're gonna start another family together. That chokes him up a bit, reminds him how grateful he is for Peter and for the other Avengers. If they hadn't been so accepting of his status, would he have ever considered going through with this?

Anyway, he's not gonna start sobbing this early in the morning when there's no alcohol involved. It's fantastic seeing his child develop, good, warm and fuzzy feelings, yada yada yada, it's also not very easy to hide. And Tony...Tony wanted to hide it from his family because.

Because Peter hasn't been the only partner in all his life that has wondered about a future with a white picket fence. Because when he was Peter's age, in his goddamn prime, a doctor, ten doctors, all the doctors told him the same thing, smashed his dream into a million pieces. Tony was nearly infertile. There was a one in a million chances of him getting pregnant. If he did, they couldn't be sure his body would be able to maintain two hearts. And then the cave happened.

So yeah. It happened to his cousins, his aunt, a few uncles, his grandmother. Tony would do a baby announcement, but only the second that baby was outside of him and safely in his arms. Now there are still several months left and nothing certain. But time is a bitch and beginning to show the world, maybe those extra pounds aren't from eating the Parker's amazing breakfasts.

"Tony, you know I don't wanna risk-" Losing control of my strength. They've been together long enough that Tony can see quite clearly between the lines.

"Hurting us, yeah, I know, I understand. I'm getting too wide, we're gonna have to tell them or Natasha will take one look at me and whoops, impromptu announcement from someone else. It's a miracle she was out on those missions when we found out." Thank God for renegade troops.

He's still looking at himself in the mirror when Peter comes out, barely dries up and slides behind him. His husband is slightly taller now, can easily hook a curved jaw on Tony's shoulder to peer at the image they make. Contrasts, he supposes, have always enthralled Tony. The study of light and shadow. Variations of the same basic components. Where his body is aging, showing signs of wear and tear, Peter's is evolving into something beautiful, majestic. Silver hair, chestnut brown. Scarred canvas, silky smooth and sunkissed skin. Soft, fragile curves, chiseled lines that deserve to be revered more than Michelangelo’s David. But their eyes, their eyes are equally tired.

“We can tell them if you want, have dinner together and just, just say it. Like that -”

“No. It's our kid, we're not gonna act like it's ripping off a band aid. This is special, unique. Dinner is good. Fantastic, actually. Wait for dessert, and announce it. “ Peter comes ever closer, wraps arms that could carry the world around him and how did he get so lucky?

They've lied to each other in the past. Mostly in the beginning, when they were too worried about hurting their new relationship to show their desires and wants. Tony didn't explain the Training Wheels Protocol. Peter tried to fight high level crime on his own. Things got hard to understand, like being in the right place at the wrong time. Puzzle pieces that didn't quite fit together, an extra inch of space prohibiting them from seeing all the possibilities that the truth could bring. They were walking the same path, just in parallel lines that never crossed.

But then he'd been rejected, thrown away and able to realize how fucking stupid it was to let Peter go when being near the kid, it felt like finally breathing after residing in the deep end of a pool for a thousand years. So Tony ran after him one day, crashed into his AP English class, half assed an excuse for the baffled teacher, yanked Peter out of the room and proceeded to have the best make out session of his life with his back against the kid's locker. And now they don't lie, ever.

Which is why it's so hard to accept Peter's, “You're beautiful, Tony. The handsomest man I've ever seen in my life. I loved you before, I love you now, I'll love you forever, Anthony Stark. You carrying our kid doesn't change that, how could it, Tony? It's going to be ok. The three of us will be ok and I won't stop thanking whoever decided I'd get to marry my wet dream.”

Scorching kisses trace his pulse point slowly, sharp nails start dragging against a too thin shirt, but it's the fact that Peter hasn't looked away from him, is confidently holding his gaze through the glass, that makes Tony shudder and stop breathing.

The bathroom is flooded with pheromones, cinnamon and honey assaulting an unprepared billionaire, and he'll die if they stay like this, can't function properly, brain switching gears, trying valiantly to remember baseball stats, past wounds, May's cooking because Peter's gonna wreck his sanity if those hands keep winding down, if those lips don't stop unraveling him like a Christmas present.

“If I'd known you'd get this handsy and romantic, I would have complained about how I look earlier." It's a gasp, half murmur, half plea as Peter grins at him shamelessly. “I know it's rude and wrong and sexist, but I like comforting my omega, acting like a stereotypical alpha. Makes me feel like I'm doing my job of making you happy. “

He quirks an eyebrow, is glad Peter can be comfortable enough to take the reins every once in a while. “You're telling me that assuring me I'm still drop dead gorgeous, “ his husband snorts, nips at Tony's shoulder for that quip, “ makes you horny because you feel like an alpha comforting, and I quote, ‘your omega’? “

Peter reverts back to the shy teenager who could barely ask a girl out to the homecoming dance, ducks his head into Tony’s neck with a blush quickly spreading over damp skin. “Well, I've got news for you, sweetheart. Your wet dream also thoroughly enjoys it so you better break tradition and have sex with me to remind me I'm the hottest man you've ever seen. "

He's actually serious about this, his self esteem hasn't exactly been, you know, the best and Tony's mood always improves significantly after playing around in bed with Peter. Besides, it's a sign of trust. Peter won't hurt him or their child, will be able to hold back his strength. He always does.

Listen, it's not exactly moral, but he has more than enough problems to go ahead and analyze his attraction and dependency on Peter while pregnant.

“So, I can distract you from your bad thoughts by acting sort of possessive and taking you to bed? " Oh, he adores when his husband is afraid of showing a new side of himself and asks for permission ever so sweetly.

“Babe, if you don't, I'll kick you out of the apartment. Give me possessive Peter Parker any day you want, like I'm gonna complain about a gorgeous, brilliant twenty something year old all over me. Now what's it gonna be, alpha dear, bathroom or bedroom? I wouldn't mind the tile but, oh God, I forgot you could pick me up." Tony clings to broad shoulders, can't help but laugh because aren't they a pair?

-------------------------

After having what he's sure was the best sex of his life, Tony stumbles out of the bedroom with torn clothes, a dazed look in his eyes and several bruises blossoming around his neck. Peter's halfway out the doorway when Tony whistles, makes sure all their family is paying attention, blurts out, “Peter and I are having a kid. I'm pregnant, woohoo, it's great, it's amazing, save your congratulations for later. We'll do a proper thing soon, if anyone interrupts and they're not dying, I'll kill you myself. See you in a few hours, " and yanks him back in while Friday activates Sock on the Doorknob Protocol.

Rhodey and Nat clink glasses while waiting on the others to pay up on their bets regarding Tony and Peter's odd behavior.

--------------------------

Later, much later, like, two days later, they have a proper dinner with their family in the tower. There are balloons and streamers, cake and ice cream, warm hugs and gentle cheek kisses, subtle tears and full on weeping (Happy had to borrow a box of Kleenex), pictures and videos and a pile of gifts taller than Tony.

The most important thing, though, is that the A.I recorded the reaction after Clint asked about baby names. He's grateful they went to the doctor before tonight. The visit revealed a treasure Tony thought he'd never have. Now it's time to reveal it to their pack.

His husband snuggles up to him, is so ecstatic the whole dining room smells like cinnamon and honey, like joyous love he'll never get enough of. Tony grins at him, curls their hands together and repeats the same thing over and over again in his head.

It'll be ok. They'll be ok. If the universe keeps giving Tony the greatest gifts he could ever want, maybe it's time he stopped looking at the horse's mouth. That's how it goes, right? Right.

He turns to look at Peter, loves him so much it aches, feels tiny feet pressing against his stomach. Guesses he's not the only one smitten with this incredible human being.

“We were thinking Marie,” Peter smiles at him, eyes lit up and lovely.

Tony is never going to forget this moment, this warmth in his chest.

“And Benjamin Parker-Stark.”

Their family loses their shit and both Friday and Karen have ample proof.

(@puppypeter look, omega tones! @tonystarkisaslut thank you so much for allowing me to use the prompt board! I am still accepting prompts! Although I can't guarantee getting them ready within a few days, I'll try to finish them on the one week mark depending on how long the fic is!)

[chalkrevelations]

Ep 27 of Word of Honor, and that was … Well. That was definitely the unicorn chaser to spending so much time and hugging with Awful Yifu in the last episode.

(Spoilers, as ever, so scroll away and come back later, if you’re still planning to watch unspoiled.)

I mean, what is there to say?

Ha, no, really, I can find plenty to say. Buckle up, I guess.

Clearly, I’m going to talk about The Scene, and there’s a lot going on here, besides the obvious cake frosting of everyone coming to everyone else’s rescue and the fighting and the crying and the declarations, and then once it’s all over, when everybody’s still hopped up on adrenaline, before the crash hits, the shouting and the laughing. At the end of it, we’re not even 20 minutes into the ep, and I feel like that should have been the climax (har), but they probably knew nobody would be able to concentrate on anything else that came before it. I’ve seen a couple of interviews now where Zhang Zhehan said he wanted to play Wen Kexing, and given the chance, he would probably still pick that role, and then everyone involved in the interview rambles on about the complexity of the Wen Kexing character, and it makes me worry that Zhang Zhehan isn’t giving himself or Zhou Zishu enough credit for the depth and range that he pulled out of the character. There’s a lot of various people yelling at various other people in many different places in this show, but there’s not been a scene yet that I felt it like I did when ZZS shouts at WKX after Ye Baiyi finally goes away, wanting to know what the fuck he was thinking. That felt real, and it felt layered – like, there’s a bone-deep fear that’s giving that anger extra strength, fear about the fact that WKX could be so self-destructive. Which also may force ZZS to confront for the first time the idea that WKX could die and leave him alone, just like all his other shidi died and left him alone. I’d have to go back and rummage around in previous eps, but I feel like this could be the first time ZZS really has to confront the idea that could happen, and he’s probably not at all prepared for it, because he’s understandably expecting to be the first to go. But this idea that WKX could just disappear, and get himself killed (because let’s face it, Ye Baiyi tossed them both around like toys), and ZZS would never see him again – that he would abandon ZZS like that, just to hide his secrets – I think that might be part of the anger, here. (You don’t fail me … and Zhou Zishou’s expectations for what constitutes not being failed are a pretty low bar, consisting mainly of not getting yourself killed like a fucking dumbass, and even that bar suddenly seems to be too high for Wen Kexing to clear.)

There’s also a clear parallel here, need I say, to the scene in a previous ep when Gu Xiang (WKX) begs Shen Shen (Ye Baiyi) that even after Shen Shen (Ye Baiyi) kills her (him), could he just for god’s sake not tell her (his) boyfriend who she (he) really was. Wen Kexing’s supposedly thought-out plan was basically just going to be what A-Xiang came up with on the fly, and stupid babies need the most love, I remind myself grimly, particularly when all this is about something Zhou Zishu already knew anyway, because he’s a brilliant former merciless assassin, not a good-hearted self-deprecating cinnamon roll who thinks he’s the least talented person in his sect like Cao Weining. We’ve also got some tasty philosophical stuff in this whole confrontation, including competing responsibilities – loyalty vs. justice vs. integrity – along with ideas of retributive vs. restorative justice. This is another good Zhang Zhehan acting moment, because that whole bit about how, actually, Grandpa, his shifu would have been about guiding his shidi toward kindness and making up for the mistakes he made – I actually believe he’s wholly thinking about Wen Kexing when he pulls out this philosophical rapier, and not at all about how restorative justice benefits ZZS, himself, considering how much blood he has on his own hands and that earlier conversation about frying in oil for 80 vs. 100 years. Good job, my friend. The one thing that makes me sad about this scene is that I’ve seen That Extra, and I hate we were robbed of not only Zhou Zishu actually laying his head on Wen Kexing’s shoulder but of Gong Jun’s single crystalline tear spilling down his cheek. Zhang Zehan’s right, that was a better take.

Anyway, Ye Baiyi proceeds to put WKX under house arrest, which, just. So he has to live with ZZS for the rest of his life? Please don’t throw him into the briar patch, right?

Also, yes, WKX. He’d die for you, dumbass. God.

Just to drive home the point of how the Wen Kexing/Zhou Zishou and Gu Xiang/Cao Weining relationships are the same relationship, we then go to a scene … well, we then go directly to a scene where Cao Weining is just sitting there, chin in hand, gazing adoringly at Gu Xiang, much the way Wen Kexing has been gazing adoringly at Zhou Zishu since about Ep 3 2 1 …  but that also leads into a scene where Cao Weining is interrogated about Gu Xiang by his shixiong in a milder, miniature version of the grilling ZZS just took from his elder. “Do you know who she is?” Whoever she is, he’s going to continue to respect her boundaries. “I promised her, so I won’t betray or distrust her.” “We’ve been through so much together.” (“We’re in the same boat anyway, we might as well stay together.”) I won’t fail you. Nobody in this scene has actually made the Ghost Valley connection, yet, and Cao Weining is not as canny as Zhou Zishu, so we’re not yet going to get any kind of resolution on the issue in this relationship - but given the way these relationships are running on parallel tracks, I have positive feelings about how Cao Weining is going to meet this challenge (not that I didn’t, anyway) once the info finally does come out.

What else, what else? We do go back to Xie Wang and Awful Yifu in this ep, and oh boy.

Xie’er: Ghost Valley Master’s faithful minion Heartless Amethyst Fiend has been sent by her master to sneakily follow Cao Weining and infiltrate the Gentle Wind Sword Sect where the Glazed Armor is being held.

A-Xiang, chillin’ outside the gated community in a rustic cabin with her fiancé, doing some mending and waiting for her wedding day: Never speak of my former master again, I have utterly left that life behind me. Also, what should we have for dinner?

I can see how you would come to the conclusion you did, Xie’er, but wow, the only time you’ve been more wrong in your life is about your Awful Yifu. Speaking of which, it appears the cat Awful Yifu is out of the bag. Xie Wang is still all, “Since you saved me, you can take my life back if you want,” and here we are in Zhou Zishu-Prince Jin territory again, shades of ZZS in Ep 1 not even blinking as he offers himself to Prince Jin and takes the gamble that he won’t just get his head cut off for his troubles. ALSO, I distinctly remember telling you, Xie’er, that you were empathizing (although not sympathizing) a bit much with the women of the Department of the Unfaithful, and here we do in fact get an explicit comparison, looking back to the conversation with Beauty Ghost about her loser boyfriend, when you refer to yourself as “also a gambler” as you take your leave of Zhao JIng. You need some Water of Lethe, buddy. Or do you think – to return to that conversation and the parallels with Beauty Ghost – that if you remember all this, you’ll stop making the same mistakes?

A last few random things:

lol, let’s all take a minute to giggle over the fact that ZZS has, in Ye Baiyi’s words, associated with this dude. Is that what the kids are calling it these days? Sorry, but I had to pause the show at that point to snicker like a 12-year-old.

Chengling: “How dare those ruffians beat my two dads! Let’s burn down their house.” Wow. OK. Xiang-jie has been … some kind of influence on her didi.

Last scene of ZZS and WKX, oh my god:

ZZS: You’re feeling bad for keeping a secret from a kid? What about me? How are you going to make it up to me?

WKX: Oh, my goodness, look at the time. I’m feeling so … sleepy. Yes, that’s it. I must go to bed. You also must be so … sleepy. You should. You know. Go to bed. Too. Also. To cure your … sleepiness. As you do, in a bed. Where I will also be.

Me, to the screen: He’s going to make it up to you on his back.

Also me: :facepalm: You are a pair of merciless killers. How are you this adorable?

[antiloreolympus]

6 Anti LO Asks

1. wasnt there a myth where ares dates demeter? (sometims erinyes instead) and they have a CHILD together? i know RS doesn't really research so it wont come up, but ... how awkward would that family reunion be? "hello, barely-legal version of the teenage girl i tried to mack on, i knocked up your mother"?

2. (Bit of a rant so be warned) I wish that RS had characterized everyone better, I mean I still can’t get over how Apollo was characterized (I got into LO before I fully delved into mythology and once I read on how Apollo really was I didn’t know how to feel about the story). It would’ve been so amazing if she portrayed them differently than they were in the myths in a way that made sense, like Aphrodite given a fully developed personality outside of being a bitch with a pretty face (she was a very loving mother in the myths and very much loved Ares, who adored her as well). And let’s be honest, persephone being a ��cinnamon roll that can secretly kill you” trope is kind of getting boring, RS could have had some more fun with her character by portraying her much differently. Another trope that’s getting old is Demeter being an overprotective, controlling mess of a mother towards persephone which sucks once you really think about it (I mean the poor woman lost her daughter in an instant and didn’t know what was going on until she had to go to Helios to find out, she deserves a better portrayal than what RS gave her). Heck my favorite portrayal of Demeter that feels accurate to how she is mother-wise in the myths is from Mythic the Musical (“Mother’s Do What Mother’s Have to Do”). Also don’t get me started on how dirty she did Thetis (I love her design but my god was she done wrong personality and even role wise). I remember when I first started reading this and read through the majority of the comic and I genuinely loved it, not thinking about how weird it was until I read through this blog and it kind of just hit me. Hades is a creep in LO and he could’ve just not been written that way, she didn’t have to write Persephone as a literal 19 year old (even 119 is young for gods but at least that would’ve been a more comfortable number) the baby shower gift thing was gross once I thought about it again. If I had to put my main frustrations with this series I would put these as the main problems: Gods/Goddesses being done dirty in terms of personality and role in the story, Hades being a high key creep, I heard that Chiron is being portrayed as female which defeats one of the purposes of his character (he’s a genuinely kind man which is rare to find in Greek Mythology, he’s awesome), not utilizing other Greek mythological figures to help move the story along or even help persephone (for example, Ganymede who’s story starts off very much like hers or even other figures who were SA by gods), and Persephone not only being a self insert but a major Mary Sue which is a massive yikes when it comes to a serious storyline. Oh and her “erasing” the incest factor of Greek Mythology is hysterical because even with how she changes it up, Hades and Persephone are STILL technically related because Demeter is Hera’s sister, who is married to Zeus (Hades’ brother) still making Hades her uncle by marriage smh. Demeter considers Persephone her daughter so that doesn’t erase the incest completely. At least Percy Jackson made it clear that it was a thing, and they handled it very easily: they’re divine beings that don’t have blood and they’re not mortals, despite that Percy and the other demigods express obvious disgust at the topic. Done and done. At the end of the day I’m still not sure how I feel about LO and maybe I’ll continue reading it for the hell of it or just give it up since from what I’ve heard, the story has gone off the rails

3. i like how just off that timeline, we're supposed to feel like "aw look both hades and persephone had traumatic childhoods and important life changes at 19!" instead of being like yooooo this seven year beat the shit out of his dad and took him out? why would i care about hades' teen angst and then late 20s man pain whi lusts after a 9 year old when a goddamn second grader can kick ass? also yeah depending on this timeline theyre all pedos and zeus is actually a vicim 🤷🏼‍♀️

4. Okay, I could be misremembering things but, didn't Hera have a file on Persephone (which listed her under the TGOEM program) that she made for "possible suitors" purposes? And she included Hermes and Ares and Hades?

Again, I could be misremembering this but doesnt the TGOEM require the goddesses to, not be in relationships? Romantic or otherwise? And if thats the case, then why the f*ck was Hera making a "compatibility chart" of possible husbands for Persephone?

Was it because she noticed that Persephone and Hades had a thing for each other? Even though she was potentially still having an affair with Hades at the time And knowing he was having an off and on again relationship with Minthe?

Also isnt Persephone in college on the TGOEM scholarship? So wouldn't Hera want to like, talk to Athena + Hestia about that? And be like "Hey so I know Kore is in your program, but.... I want her to marry Hades" And I know Hera is technically Queen of the gods but wouldn't she still check with them?

Also, I had a seperate thought. So I know Hades says something like "I thought we agreed not to (see each other) back in the 80's" - now it feels like because Hera is/was having an off-and-on againa affair with her brother in law that her putting Hades and Persephone together and setting them up as a couple is an excuse for her to cover up her affair.

(Like if Zeus ever got wind of Hera's affair with Hades and he was upset she could just try to side sweep it by being like "oh, no thats not what was happening. I was really checking to see if Hades is a good match for Persephone and he is!" So she doesnt get in trouble for having an affair).

5. okay, legitimate question: if artemis having a ton of uber-devoted female followers is enough to make her a lesbian ... why is ares not gay? because like ... not only were soldiers/male athletes famously homosexual, a lot of them basically ritually gave themselves to ares. it's heavily implied that this means that they considered themselves spiritually his eromenos'. the whole practice's bad implics aside ... ares should be SUPER gay? oiled up gym-rats wrestling nude levels of gay.

6. Okay so normally I don't care and or don't want to know, but - in this case I am a bit curious - is Persephone just RS's self insert character / Mary sue? Because if she is then that means that all the other male characters simping over Persephone (Hades, Hermes, Ares, Apollo, etc) gets a lot more concerning.

[lethesomething]

An otome lover’s guide to A3

So. A3.

Not an actual otome, but the actor management game and anime from Cybird (of Ikemen All the Things fame) has a bunch of boys. Ok, so a Lot of Boys. All the Boys, in fact. And men. Some of them are like thirty. Which is refreshing.

Where do you even begin telling them apart? Here is an Attempt, based on the first season of the game.

Spring troupe: The Vanilla boys

Bright, youthful, mostly kinda normal. This troupe stands out  for its overall lack of experience and its anime protag willingness to overcome hurdles. Most resembles the main team in a sports anime.

Sakuya Is baby. This boy is a golden retriever puppy that has yet to realize he's ended up in human form. Orphan street urchin with a heart of gold. He's kinda useless as an actor but he will ganba all the way until he makes it. Protect him. Mostly from himself.

Masumi A Giant Friggin Red Flag. Weirdly obsessed with MC. His personality apart from stalker syndrome is what I like to call 'the Kageyama Tobio': genius at one thing and uninterested or terrible at everything else. He is seemingly incapable of social interactions and at best uninterested in any of them apart from MC. Also really harsh on people who don't perform to his standards, which is almost everyone.

Tzuzuru The Self Sacrificing One. Look, this dude gave up most of his dreams to look after his siblings, and he literally joined you because otherwise he'd be sleeping in a cardboard box (Why are all these dudes street urchins?) Wants to be a playwright so he foregoes any semblance of sleep to finish scripts. Has the spinal cord of a jellyfish unless in Very Specific Cases. Cute when he pouts. Pouts a lot. Someone save him.

Itaru Jekyll and XxHydexX. Super cordial professional by day, game addict that will murder you for messing up his kill streak by night. He's So Friggin Pretty why is he a dick?? Doesn't really know if he's even into this theatre thing. You know he is. Of course he is. Calms down tremendously over the course of the arc, just don't, you know, get between him and his gamer score I guess.

Citron What the Foreigner. Mysterious foreign prince possibly on the run from his parents/the cops. Your theatre is a convenient hiding place for him, because obviously getting into showbiz is what you do when you want to remain anonymous. Speaks Japanese in a weird way. In fact, he sounds Exactly Like Utapri's Cecil despite having a different VA.  Quirky to a fault. Has potentially been trained as some kind of covert operative but is surprisingly cheerful about everything.

Summer Troupe: The Diva's

A group of highly talented dudes with varying degrees of social issues. Most resembles the cast of a smaller indie otome game.

Tenma The Arrogant One. A child actor from tv wanting to learn stage work. Has zero social skills. He's brash, completely full of himself and extremely critical of everyone else. Needs to learn the Power of Friendship which, spoiler, he obviously does, albeit in a very tsun kindof way. Can't let them know you care, ever.

Yuki Salt Personified. This kid is friggin 14 years old and wears dresses but he will rip you to shreds with his words. Winner of the most deadpan delivery of burns. He's in middle school ffs. Really into fashion. Resident costume designer. Potentially serves as a representation on gender roles in theatre, but the whole thing is fairly lowkey. The team, bless them, just accept him for who he is, sharp tongue and all.

Muku The Soft One. Another middle schooler, this one is way less sharp with his words. Into shoujou manga. Has severe insecurities and a propensity to start sentences with 'um'. Shaking leaf, what is he doing on a friggin stage. He actually has pink hair, could he BE any more squishy. Protecc.

Misumi The Weird One. I realize several characters fit that description, but Misumi is obsessed with triangles and lives in a  liminal space between realities so I don't know what to tell you. Also he's like… spiderman. Inhuman amount of acrobatics. Another homeless street urchin (Tokyo - is it Tokyo??? - appears to have an issue, guys). Sweet dude though. Chill and positive about everything, as long as it is triangular.

Kazunari The Influencer. Resident designer and bigshot on social media. He's down with Literally Everything. Likes everyone, is cool about every instance. Unerringly positive to an unhealthy degree. Really, Really conflict averse, even. You could call him painfully insecure, but that's like most of the cast. Wearer of hats in a non-ironic way.

Autumn Troupe: The Delinquents

This troupe consists almost entirely out of (ex) violent delinquents and (ex) criminals. The tough guys, no one here is totally innocent. Most resembles the cast of a beat-em-up.

Banri The Number One. Hotshot teenager who's never tasted defeat in his life. Good at anything without trying, so he never tries. Obsessed with outperforming Juza because he's like the one dude Banri can't beat at fisticuffs. Honestly kinda insufferable for most of their arc.

Juza The Lone Wolf. Cursed with a resting bitch face and an inability to perform in social settings. Considered a delinquent and constantly challenged to fights. Is actually sweet lamb, just with lots of muscles. Cripplingly low self esteem. Wants to act to be someone else. Protect at all costs.

Omi The Responsible one. Wait, that was an option?? Big brother type. Perfect son in law. A keeper. This guy is mature and he cooks and it makes me wonder what's wrong with him. There's probably a dark secret (narrator voice: there was a dark secret).

Taichi The Sunshine Child. Really into yoyo's. Like the toy, not the male subspecies. Has the hair colour and the vocal volume of a shonen jump protag. Bouncy and very loud. Feels way younger than the middle schoolers, though he's in high school.

Sakyo The Debt Collector. Actual yakuza agent. The one the theatre owes a lot of money too. Secretly really loves the performing arts, because of course he does. Massive tsun. I wasn't looking at you, baka. Should have been an accounting professor in another life. Wordy.

Winter troupe:The Drama Team.

No really, most of them have drama and angst written all over them. Only team that consists entirely out of actual adults. Angsty adults, but still. Most resemble the cast of a daytime soap opera.

Tasuku The Defector. The top actor from the rival gang troupe that joined Mankai instead. Fitness buff. Pretty clear about his boundaries for right and wrong. Sweet bean, really. Has a lot of emotions about his childhood friend Tsumugi. Seems to have a lot of feelings in general. Red oni type.

Tsumugi The Subdued one. Talks like a wallflower, looks like he got his fashion choices out of a high end french magazine from the eighties. One of the boring ones. Cinnamon roll. Blue oni. Massive self esteem issues due to past trauma. Weird relationship with his childhood friend Tasuku. They'll work it out, you know they will.

Hisoka The Narcoleptic. Literally washed up and adopted by the  theatre group that found him. Weirdly good at acting. Sleeps about 80 percent of the day. Needs to be poked and cajoled with treats. Might actually be a cat. Has no recollection of his life before he was picked off the street by a desperate director.

Homare The 'Extra AF'. A poet who dresses in loud costumes and has really stupid hair. Loud, overtly confident in his bad poetry and just generally confusing to watch. A Gentleman. Flamboyant. Kinda gay coded. Hisoka's crutch and the only reason that man is able to perform like a human being.

Azuma The Flirty One. A Cuddling Professional, because this is a teen rated game and we can't put in an actual prostitute or host. Unnaturally pretty. Indeterminate age. Sensitive. At least one of these dudes has empathetic abilities, may as well be the cute one. Extremely flirty and Experienced (tm) at life.

[fallin-flcwer]

PHOENIX LIN TRUTH BOOTH

GENERAL QUESTIONS

1. Please state your full name: I go by three names, but they’re all more or less the same, just translated differently. The name I was born with is Lin Feng Huang, which translates to Lam Fung Wong in Cantonese, then my English name is Phoenix Lin. 2. Does your name(s) have any kind of meaning? If so, what is it? Feng Huang means Phoenix in English, hence why it’s my English name  3. Do you have any nicknames? Nix, Duck Lin, Kung Pho Panda (thanks Addison), Shitlin (thanks Luca). No one really calls me it, but I also like being called Nixie. 4. Where were you born? And in which country? I was born in Violet Springs 5. What is your date of birth? 24th of October, 2000 6. Of course, the following question; what is your Zodiac sign? Scorpio 7. Do you believe in Zodiac signs? Yes. 8. Where do you live? Lilac Wells 9. What is your home situation like? (ex. do you live with your family? Your partner etc.?) I live with my mum and Duyi 10. Do you have any siblings? I have an older half-brother. We've never spoken to each other, and I don’t plan on doing so. 11. Do you have any kind of allergies? I have a small allergy to cinnamon 12. Do you own any pets? If so, what kind of pets are they? I’ve got a chihuahua called Chia and a Siamese cat called Cat. 13. Why did you apply to St Jude’s? Not gonna lie, the part of it was because my friends planned to go there, but there were also some teachers there that I admire, and still do. 14. Did you had to go through a lot audition rounds? Nope. 15. What is the current course you’re following? Netball and Swimming. I did do gymnastics and modelling but I dropped them earlier this year. 16. If you can switch courses, which one would you switch to and why? I would do modelling if I wasn’t so focused on sports. 17. What is your proudest project you’ve done? I think for sports, it’s pretty much... you know.. sport. But playing The Female for Felix’s show, The Boys, is something I never thought I'd be able to do, but I’ve found it so fun. 18. What is the proudest project that someone’s else has done? Cindy getting into a national soccer team. It cost me seeing her religiously but that’s okay. 19. Do you like FanCons? Yes. Being a sports person, you don’t get many stans the way musicians and actors here do, but it’s still fun. 20. What do you like about FanCons? Meeting the fans I do have. 21. What don’t you like about FanCons? It really does tire me out from time to time. Not all of them, but there have been some. 22. A fan memory that always stuck with you? Can be positive or negative. A little girl came to me and talked to me about how happy she was to see an Asian sportswoman. 23. Your favorite event so far? The halloween party in my first year LMAO. 24. What kind of event would you like to see in the future? Anything that has to do with travelling. 25. Would you recommend St Jude’s to friends, family. etc? If they’re pursuing a career in the Arts, yes

PERSONALITY QUESTIONS

26. What are your positive traits? Level-headed, realistic and supportive 27. What are you negative traits? I can be a bit bossy and stubborn 28. What would other people describe you as? Carefree 29. What are your pet peeves? Loud chewers 30. What makes you happy? This has to be the most un-Phoenix-like answer but watching pottery videos. My mum used to take me to her pottery lessons growing up, but I never did it myself. 31. What makes you upset? Seeing people I care about upset 32. What is something you love? Food, my mum and my friends 33. What is something you dislike? My  34. What are you strengths? Saving money (thanks mum), biology, and sport 35. What are you weaknesses? I definitely struggle with empathising with people I can’t relate to, but it’s something I want to learn to do 36. A misconception people often think of you? That I’m a very idgaf person. I like to come off that way bc it’s just easier for me, but I’m definitely a bit more sensitive than I like to let off. 37. Do you have any fears? I’m scared of frogs, but you would be too if your little cousin chased you around with one 38. What scares you the most? Losing my mum, honestly. I’d go insane at this point if it wasn’t for her. 39. What do you do to entertain yourself? Watch vine compilations on youtube. 40. What is your MBTI? ESTJ. 41. How do you deal with stress? Shut it out completely. 42. Are you a determined person? Are you a stubborn person? I’m definitely both. 43. Do you consider yourself selfish? Yes. 44. Would you like to be different? In some ways, yes. 45. Are you more introverted (focused on your inner world) or more extraverted (focused on other people and the outer world)? Honestly, I think I’m both but I lean more towards extroverted.

ROMANCE QUESTIONS

46. What is your sexual orientation? I’m bisexual. 47. Current relationship status? Single, but I may or may not be emotionally invested in Gabriel. 48. When was your first kiss? I was around 15. 49. Do you remember your first date? If so, with who was it? What did you do? It was with one of my human biology classmates. She took me out to the movies and went out for bubble tea afterwards. 50. Have you ever experienced heart-break? No. 51. Have you ever been in love? (If yes, skip to question 53) No. 52. If no, how so? I just don’t think I’ve ever felt how I’m supposed to when I’m ‘in love’ 53. How do you know when you’re in love? I wouldn’t know. Sorry. 54. What would be your ideal date? Just something indoors. We can have takeout, watch a movie, whatever. I’m not picky. 55. What is your perspective on marriage? I think marriage is a little bit overhyped. Obviously, marriage is good when it’s done right, but really it’s pretty much a relationship topped off with a ring and a fancy ceremony. Just because someone said their vows and “I do” doesn’t mean that they’re not going to cheat if they want to, in my eyes. 56. (only for non-virgins) Are you a sub, dom or switch? I don’t really believe in dom/sub roles. Like just get on with it. However, I will admit that I like being on top. 57. What do you think of relationships? As of right now, I don’t think I’m ready to be in a committed relationship, but then again I don’t believe in actively looking for a relationship. I think things will unfold over time and I’ve just gotta let it be.  58. What do you think of one-night stands? I don’t have an issue with them. 59. Are you still a virgin? No. 60. Most attractive trait in a different person? Their confidence, and as how well they treat people. 61. What matters most to you when it comes to a relationship? Honesty and trust. 62. Are you comfortable with PDA? Or would you be comfortable with PDA? Yes, but only in very small doses. 63. Are you more of a type to be asked out or the type to ask the other out? It depends on the person. 64. How do you express love to the other? I will cook for you, or at least try to.  65. Who is your celebrity crush? Jeon Wonwoo.

GETTING DEEP QUESTIONS

66. Do you regret anything? Yes 67. Is there something you would like to re-do? So, start all over again? My entire first year here 68. What is something you would never share with anyone? Pass, because that would mean that I shared it 69. When was the last time you cried? Why did you cry? Maybe like last week. I think I’m more sensitive than I like to let off 70. Most memorable event that happened in your time in St Judes? This could be anything: Halloween in my first year, when Cindy brought me an inflatable panda suit and rolled me around in it. 71. One thing you wish you could do all over? My first year 72. Someone you miss? My Grandmother 73. Something you wish you could forget? Anything involving my dad 74. Who has the biggest impact on you? My mum 75. What is your perspective on love? Is it beautiful? Does it scare you? There have been some things that have happened in my life that has changed my perspective on love dramatically.  76. What has hurt you in the past that you don’t want others to go through? Pass 77. What is something you have gained, something you have lost and something you let go of during the past year? I’ve gained some more initiative. I’ve lost some confidence but at the same time I’ve definitely let go of some self hatred I’ve been holding onto. I doesn’t seem like it makes sense but it does to me 78. Have you ever lost a friend? do you wish you would still be friends? My sports squad :( minus Luca obviously.  79. Do you have any triggers? What is the history behind these triggers and are they related to any disorders or mental illnesses? None that I’m willing to talk about  80. If you could meet your 16 year old self, what would tell them? As much as you want to be with your friends. Maybe St. Judes isn’t the best choice. And if you are as stubborn as I remember you to be, if you do go, please be more careful this time.

RANDOM QUESTION ROUND

81. Summer or Winter? Winter 82. Cats or dogs? Cats 83. Beach or mountains? Mountains 84. Phone calls or texting? Texting 85. Have you ever skipped class? Yes

[ciriceart]

IN THE ABSENCE OF GOOD IDEAS - Another non-comprehensive playlist

You spend another hour trying to find each other, to recognize each other. You drink a little too much, and try a little too hard. And you go home to a cold bed and think, that was fine. And your life is a long line of fine.

What if there was another story?

A History of Bad Men

It's easy for me, I got a head start running away [...] How did you learn to be sick, so cunning / It's easy to sing, but you just keep on humming along / Did you hear that? I got a real bad feeling

This is not the place for you to be in, my man. Stop ignoring the red flags, you gotta get outta there! This one works very well thematically. The instrumentals and vocals really drag on and give a good look into Cirice’s general disposition as well as his taste in music. He likes sludgy, doom and gloom-type shit. 

Everyone Gets Left Behind

Sometimes we're drunker than a little / And I swear I don't have to throw up (liar) / And the best times are always the worst with the people we love [...] I must have died and gone to Heaven / 'Cause this is boring as Hell

Works for both early and later plot points! No further commentary necessary.

Some Kind of Disaster Relief

You got more trouble than you can handle, honey! / The fuck you gonna do? How you gonna scrape on by? / I do believe that there are two things you do in this situation / Leave town, or go into hiding / Cause some people got brains and other people got talent, others just look good / You and me, we got none of those things, but listen up [...] It's a rabbit suffocating in a rabbit hole / It's politics as usual.

Lyrics-wise, this song doesn't have very much to do with what’s going on outside of the intro. The intro is pretty fucking spot on. (If you ignore the glaring issue of P2 having more than enough brains/talent/looks for the both of em.) 

The title is the same as a certain very important chapter, but it’s here because this is more or less what Cirice sounds like when his voice gets above mumbling-speaking level. Every time he’s depicted as loud, obnoxious and yelling, I want you to hear this intro in your head. 

Mental Illness as Mating Ritual

I'm a number, I'm a clown / I'm a ruined halfwit, in a hospital gown / You're a victim? Get in line! / It's okay, I'm damaged by design [...] This body's wrecked, but it's mine [...] It's okay, I know, better luck next time. 

Sort of coming to terms with the whole, you know, thing. Sort of. Lots of aggression, lashing out and feeling overwhelmed, and then some more lashing out for good measure, but trying very very hard to look like he’s owning it. 

Goddamn These Hands of Mine

So goddamn this city / Goddamn these people / Goddamn this weather / And goddamn these broken down hands of mine

Have you ever been so angry and tired and fed up with the nonstop inane bullshit of everybody around you and everyday life that you can’t see straight, and your hands are shaking, and you can feel your pulse hammering in your throat, and it’s made even worse by you knowing that you’re part of the problem? Don’t you get tired of (trying and failing at) being nice all the time? Don’t you just wanna go apeshit? 

This song is pretty much exactly what hypomanic agitation sounds like. Trust me. 

A Drink To Death

It'll eat your insides, your brain burns, and your skin dries / Bumbling through the alleys, like you think you're still alive / I wanna hold you closely, I wanna smell your sweat [...] There will be no candles, there will be no romance, I will be alone, we will not hold hands [...] And if I pass out, wake me up / I may be drunk, but I'm not drunk enough / We were nice together, weren't we once?

This one is a holdover from the original version of this story, which was written in late 2018, if you can believe it. During the rewriting process, I thought it would be nice to write something... nice. I still have a lot of fondness for this song in the context of II/Cirice - it still works quite well for both of their inner disasterbrain feelings and respective bad coping skills, even if it isn’t as applicable anymore in a literal sense. Doesn’t mean they can’t still dance half-drunk in the office past closing time to some That Handsome Devil played over shitty desktop speakers.  

There You Are (Hiding Place)

Stumbled on a long walk somewhere / So many places we don't belong / So few we do [...] I was afraid to find an older me alive in you [...] And you go silent by your own hands / You break down and you leave / You go nightly with my panic / I get angry / I can't sleep

This one is... a lot. Probably one of the most important songs, relationship-wise, but I don’t have many words as to why. I’m mostly sort of embarrassed to even explain this one in detail. The song speaks for itself, probably. 

Pepper

I don't mind the sun sometimes, the images it shows / I can taste you on my lips and smell you in my clothes / Cinnamon and sugary and softly spoken lies / You never know just how you look through other people's eyes

The listing of names and descriptors that make up the bulk of this song does a fairly good job of capturing, I guess, the way that Cirice views the happenings around him. He listens to a lot of shit from a lot of people; it’s part of his job at first, before he moves on to the job given to him by Papa II later on. 

There’s a clear image that I have of Cirice leaving the administrative building right around sunset and pausing on the front steps before he starts making his way home. He listens to his headphones during work a lot and Pepper makes for a pretty damn good “walking home and contemplating some interesting new tender feelings” song, in my experience. “I don’t really give a fuck about all the rest of this shit, but I kind of give a major fuck about you” kinda vibes. 

Fun fact, this song also played a role in figuring out Cirice’s “voice”. In the instances where he’s feeling shut down and closed off, this is a close approximation of what he sounds like. 

And just like the previous post, these are only a couple songs. They’re mostly in order now though, seeing as pretty much anyone aware of father cirice is aware of the circumstances of his backstory. 

Next up is (drumroll) the Nihil/Imperator 80s road trip ficm, which gives me a crisis every time I get sent an update/asked to read something over. I’ll probably type up some stuff later after Shiv has another listen to my playlist to make sure the mood is right =^) 

[stuckonvenus]

OC QUESTIONS — Lionel

BASICS

What’s their full name? — Lionel Casey Mercer.

What does their name mean? Why were they named that? — His name means ‘young lion’ and his father named him after Sir Lionel from Arthurian legend.

Do they have any nicknames? — El or Ellie.

How old are they? — Nineteen.

When’s their birthday? — February 11th.

What’s their zodiac sign/element/birthstone/etc.? Do they believe that holds any significance? — Aquarius, Air Element, and Amethyst. He only thinks they mean anything when something goes wrong and he uses his zodiac as an excuse.

What’s their species/subspecies? Do they have any special/magical abilities? — Half-elf. He has limited magical abilities in the school of transmutation.

What “class” do they belong to (for fantasy characters)? If none, what weapon do they favor? — Bard/Wizard.

APPEARANCE

What do they look like? — He has strawberry blonde hair, bright blue eyes, a small and lanky frame, and stands at 5′7.

Do they have a face claim? — Austin Abrams.

What’s their style like? Clothes, hair, makeup? —  IN GAME: Colorful tunics stitched with vine patterns, normal trousers, leather boots and occasionally flower crowns, hair is a bit longer and curly. IRL: 90s grunge, washed out band tees, ripped skinny jeans, old converse, wears eyeshadow/eyeliner during shows and has short, unkempt hair.

How do they carry themselves? What’s their default expression? — Confidently. Never seems crestfallen, almost always smiling to some extent.

Do they have any physical ailments or disabilities? — None.

PERSONALITY

What’s their alignment? — Chaotic Neutral.

Which one of the 16 Personality Types do they fit into? — ESFP: The Entertainer.

What are their hobbies and interests? Do they have any particular “favorites” (food, books, and so on)? — Music is his main interest. IRL, his favorite food is a strawberry milkshake and his favorite book is Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams.

What are they bad at? — Being serious.

What kind of things do they dislike/hate? — IN GAME: When others doubt his abilities, having his race admonished, his brother. IRL: Having his freedom limited, high expectations, letting himself being used for too long, his brother.

Do they have any vices/addictions/mental illnesses? — IRL: Bipolar disorder.

What are their goals and motivations? — IN GAME: Become a master transmutation wizard that is absurdly good at the lute. IRL: Have his music genuinely impact those who listen to it.

What are their manners like? Any habits? — IN GAME: He’s very polite, if not a bit too eager, to strangers and overly friendly. IRL: He’s still easily excitable but a little more laid back overall. Obsessively scratches his wrist when he’s nervous.

What are they most afraid of? — IN GAME: Zombies. IRL: Succumbing to the press and losing himself in fame.

BACKGROUND

Where were they born? What was their childhood like? — Las Vegas, Nevada. Pretty typical. His parents were more absent than most due to their work but he never felt alone, mostly because he had an older brother he could torment.

What’s their family like? — His father is his favorite person, his brother his least favorite, and his mother is someone he wishes he could understand more and relate to.

What factions or organizations are they a part of? What ranks and titles do they hold? — He attends the Academy and is currently a student.

How do they fit into their “story”? — His magical capabilities keep him somewhat useful in a group, and his more proficient musical talents and humor make him entertaining.

Where do they currently live? What’s their place like? — IN GAME: Currently lives in a shared room with three other wizards at the Academy. IRL: Lives in a studio apartment in Las Vegas with his cat.

How do they eventually die? — IN GAME: Most likely dies at the hand of a more powerful battlemage. IRL: Lives like Mick Jagger his whole life and probably kills himself at 80 once he develops a slight cough.

RELATIONSHIPS

Do they have any friends? Would they consider anyone to be their best friend? — IN GAME: His best friend is Diego, a cleric who also attends the Academy. IRL: The bassist of Pet Salamander, Mickey Beckett.

What’s their friend group like? What role do they play in it? — IRL: His friend group are all around his age and they’re pretty immature, him the most by far. He’s been the comic relief for as long as he can remember.

What’s their love life like? Do they have any kids? — IN GAME: Nonexistent. IRL: He fucks around with a lot of people, but a long time from now he entertains the idea of meeting someone and adopting a bunch of kids together.

Who do they look up to? Who do they trust? — IN GAME: He looks up to the Arch Mage at the Academy and trusts whoever seems friendly enough. IRL: His father is his biggest inspiration, but he doesn’t trust anyone nowadays, not even himself.

Who do they hate? Do they have any enemies? — His brother is the villain in all realities, no doubt.

Do they have any pets? — IN GAME: None. IRL: A black cat named Mina.

Are they good with kids? Animals? — Absolutely. Despite his gripes with his brother, he adores his niece, and treats his cat better than himself.

FUN FACTS

Which tropes do they fit? Which archetypes? — His main archetype is the Jester.

Do they play any instruments? Sports? — IN GAME: Lute/Vocals. IRL: Guitar/Vocals.

What are some items they always carry? — IN GAME: His wand and instrument, as well as a tin full of strawberry candies from his village. IRL: Cigarettes and eyeliner.

Do they collect anything? — IRL: Guitars. He has about 15 ranging in size, color, and shape.

What position do they sleep in? — IN GAME: Totally under the warmth of his bed roll, looks more like a lump than a person. IRL: On his stomach in a starfish position, taking up the whole bed.

Which emoji would they use the most? — Sunglasses emoji.

What languages do they speak? — English.

What’s their favorite expletive? — Fuck.

What’s their favorite candle scent? — Apples and cinnamon.

What songs remind you of them? — Scrawny by Wallows, Ghost Town by Kanye West, Ribs by Lorde.

Which animal would you say represents them? — Collie.

What stereotypical high school clique would they fit into? — Band geeks.

What would their favorite ride at an amusement park be? — The one that shoots you up two hundred feet in the air.

Do they believe in aliens? Ghosts? Reincarnation or something else? — IN GAME: He doesn’t have a choice in believing it, since they’re all real. IRL: Absolutely believes in aliens. On the fence about ghosts. Thinks there’s nothing after death, but also thinks reincarnation would be awesome.

Do they follow any religions/gods? Do they celebrate holidays? — IN GAME: Doesn’t follow any gods but will celebrate a holiday just for the hell of it. IRL: Is ethnically Jewish but is non-practicing. Celebrates both Hanukkah and Christmas.

Which Deadly Sin do they most correspond to? Which Heavenly Virtue? — Lust and Courage.

If you had to choose one tarot card to represent them, which would it be? — The Star.

[ambitionsource]

wait i actually have more weirdly specific questions (if ur up to it) - how do the kids feel about poetry? do they follow any sports? what childhood tv shows were their favs? do they have celebrity crushes? fav coming of age movie? how are they doing in quarantine? what time in history were they obsessed w as a kid? have they ever been to summer camp? what type of candles do they like? what song do they cry to? how do they drink their coffee/tea sorry if u’ve answered already/too many questions

wooooo thank you for your patience iz!! we’re gonna go point by point

poetry?

charlie loves it genuinely and will read it for fun. riley likes it enough but doesn’t go out of her way to read it. farkle loves coming up with insane explanations for the metaphors and is smug about interpreting it in class. zay doesn’t care for it, neither does lucas. asher appreciates it but finds it boring; dylan likes it for the same reason farkle does, only not to look smart but to come up with something completely crackheaded to combat farkle’s interpretation (which he can’t then say isn’t correct, bc its poetry, so all interpretations are valid!). isa doesn’t like it because she doesn’t get the metaphors on paper the same way she can pick them up in film. maya hates it even though multiple people have pointed out that song lyrics are basically poetry -- she will tune you out.

sports?

sports aren’t Big at aaa (aside from dance), but there are remnants here and there. riley follows basketball of course -- even tho as demonstrated in 110, she cannot play it to save herself -- and she tried out for cheer in 9th grade at her old school but was rejected from the squad (another bad mark on a terrible year). farkle prefers wii sports over any actual sport, but will sometimes watch golf with stuart because it’s quality time with his very busy father. charlie did soccer when he was younger before it got phased out by dance and semi keeps up with it. dylan also “played” soccer, but this meant the other little league teammates getting pissed at him bc he never paid attention to the game and was just like “hey! hey, dennis, look at this!” and did like 3 cartwheels across the field. it was a smart move when randall pulled him from the team bc those intense soccer moms were gonna like beat them up fDJSKG. so now dylan is just an unofficial gymnast instead.

isa doesn’t like sports but played them a lot with foster siblings, and even though she sucks she gets very competitive. lucas liked baseball and was good at track in middle school, but he never thought about doing a sport for real because he knew he was going to quincy eventually where his dad is a coach... yeah. no. but he’s great at running fast from the police!

maya hates sports (aside from the art of dance). waste of time, waste of energy. asher has never done a sport nor ever contemplated a sport. the most Sport he’s endured is going with jade to support dave at his swim meets (where nigel also does swim) and suffice to say, asher wasn’t there to look at the swimming.

childhood tv?

dylan to this day is a spongebob squarepants STAN. legend, icon, scholar, best television show ever made, in his opinion. he also was well-versed in pokemon, adventure time, gravity falls, and phineas and ferb. asher and lucas both didn’t watch lots of tv growing up (if at all), so dylan considers it his job to give asher a thorough education in the quality tv he missed as a kid.

maya was all over hannah montana (miley is still a role model to this day for her), and she, zay, and charlie all remember the fever dream that was shake it up. zay especially loved it bc he was (is) obsessed with zendaya. zay and maya both also watched victorious. charlie was sharing a tv with four siblings so he just ended up watching whatever the dominant sister that day wanted to watch. riley was a disney channel girl, and farkle was a pbs scholar (arthur, cyber chase, fetch! with ruff ruff man... classics).

 celebrity crushes?

zay = zendaya (as previously mentioned). charlie = harry styles to a major degree, although his Cover Story would be zendaya if you asked (ironically). maya = britney spears (but in a I Want To Be Her way, major idolization rather than attraction) and technically the same for valerie de la cruz but like... rip to that lmao. isa = loki, yes we know, but sometimes it be that way (altho that does extend a little bit towards tom hiddleston in general). asher = logan lerman, aka the main valid white boy who dresses nice, is polite and soft-spoken, and minds his own business (not to mention he is the Same Type as dylan). dylan = had crushes more on like... personalities so like ash ketchum and percy jackson, and now its irrelevant bc he met asher and became obsessed and its like every other potential crush just flew out the window of his brain. it’s full asher territory in there nowadays.

riley doesn’t have a specific one, she thinks lots of people are Pretty but no one particularly strongly. farkle doesn’t have one because he’s insane and doesn’t have the mental capacity. lucas doesn’t have one because he’s demi and also hates most celebrities as people.

coming-of-age movie?

maya’s is mean girls. farkle’s is ladybird. zay’s is easy a. riley’s is bend it like beckham. isadora’s is eighth grade. charlie’s is dead poet’s society. asher’s is perks of being a wallflower. dylan’s is spiderman: into the spiderverse. lucas doesn’t know movies.

quarantine?

we’ve somewhat discussed this before, but ultimately es and i elected to let aaa remain in a nice, calm universe where they don’t have to endure covid. lucky them. blow a kiss to the ether for us, buds,

fave time in history?

riley is huge on ancient greece and greek mythology. maya loves the theatricality and Drama of the roaring 20s (a baby flapper at heart). zay vibes hard with the 80s. charlie likes the fashion and romanticism and music and art of the 70s (that sort of flowery positivity clashing with the rebelliousness of the movements of the 60s... yeah. that hits something in him). farkle’s is the great depression not only bc he’s an emo but also all the raw and desperate art that came out of it. isadora was a egyptian mythology kid. i know lucas sounds lame (he is), but i don’t think he cares about history -- but if pushed he’d probably say the 90s bc he dresses like he’s straight out of there, everyone was angry rocking, and he wasn’t born. asher likes the victorian era bc of the sheer elegance and Aesthetic to everything. dylan doesn’t have a favorite time period because due to being the subconscious multiverse conduit (i.e. the being that is somewhat connected to every other version of himself) sometimes he wakes up and for a minute he doesn’t even know what year it is 🤪anyway...

summer camp?

charlie has been to many a christian youth summer camp. zay went to the kossal program, but that was basically it. lucas no although he probably wished he could be anywhere else during the summer sometimes including a camp he would hate. riley went for a few years in elementary school. isa has gone to a couple of “foster kid” summer camp bonding things that she despised. farkle went to jewish summer camp One time and was like that was HORRIBLE, never make me spend a whole summer outside AGAIN. asher was more of a Enrichment courses at the rec center during the summer kid than a camper. dylan no because the orlandos couldn’t afford something like that. same for maya.

candles?

riley has a small variety of scented ones that are like... warm scents, like cinnamon and stuff. asher a couple that smell like clean linen but his fear of accidental fires keeps him from ever lighting them. maya has one and it smells like “star power,” a gift from her mom one christmas. isadora can’t have any because many of her foster homes don’t allow them. lucas legally shouldn’t be allowed anything that catches on fire. dylan doesn’t have one but similarly should not be given one. the minki have a whole collection for different things so farkle can just pluck one at any time if he needs one like for a super fancy bath or whatever the fuck rich people do.

mental breakdown song?

charlie’s are “falling” and “from the dining table” by harry styles.

riley’s is “manhattan” by sara bareilles and “rainbow” by kacey musgraves.

zay’s are “imagine” by ariana and “dear life” from the step up soundtrack (post zc breakup).

farkle’s are “vienna” by billy joel and “get it right” from glee.

asher’s is “don’t cry” by ruel.

isa’s is “you are my sunshine” because valerie used to sing it to her a lot when she was really little, so it will always make her a little emotional.

dylan’s (although rare) are “soon you’ll get better” by ts and “make you feel my love” by adele. the second one is because his mom loved adele when she was just starting out bc 19 was released the same year that she passed away so there’s a lot of like subconscious association there even if he doesn’t realize it.

maya doesn’t have one, and lucas also doesn’t have one because in the rare moments he does cry its in his closet in the dark silence alone bc he literally can’t stand the sentience of knowing he’s crying so. sensory blackout.

coffee / tea?

riley will add at least 3 sugars to anything, but she’s ultimately an iced tea gal. lucas drinks it black but only because it never occurred to him to add anything to it and so it’s a big wake up call when he realizes you can drink it and have it NOT be bitter and horrible and demoralizing ( “i thought we were all just suffering for the caffeine fix??” ). isa is a tea girl mostly, although she wishes she could drink black coffee for the aesthetic (and hates that lucas can... it’s like... he didn’t even Earn that aestheticism, smh). asher doesn’t drink caffeine bc it makes him Jittery (and he’s already jittery) so he’s like... the lemonade bitch at coffee shops which kin, and then dylan definitely drinks caffeine but not thru coffee, he’s more likely to get like a hot chocolate.

farkle lives on coffee but he can only drink it from home because they’re rich and can have like fresh ground good imported whatever the heck etc etc so he’s like spoiled about coffee. zay will hit up a starbucks now and then and will order coffee at a diner, but he’s not too attached either way. maya is a fun n free starbucks gal with her frappes and lattes and lots of cream (whipped or otherwise). charlie doesn’t drink coffee or tea bc hes hyper aware of his body and health (he doesn’t really have soda either) and it was frowned upon in his house.

[rapha-reads]

harvest, cider, cinnamon, maize!

Hi Yana ! Always a pleasure to see you in my ask box. :)

Harvest : what fictional character do you most identify with ? Why ?

Eowyn of Rohan (LOTR), purely for her iconic line in response to Aragorn’s question “What do you fear ?” - “A cage. To stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recalls or desire.”For as long as I can remember, that line has echoed in me. Because I don’t want to be entraped in a single role that I did not choose all my life. I do not want to lay down my weapons, accept a fate that isn’t my doing, and let go of all the opportunities that I could have grabbed simply because someone told me “that’s not what you’re supposed to do”. At the moment I just finished my degree and I’m looking for a job. My grandfather tells me, “it’s all good to look for a job that you like, but you must also think about the financial aspect”. And I want to tell him so badly, “No, no, that’s not who I am - I am not here for the money, I am not here to be just another cog in the machine. I wasn’t born just to accept that my life has no other meaning than get up, make money, go to sleep. That’s not who I am, I don’t accept this. There’s a whole world out there, a world in need of people caring about it, protecting it, maybe even (let’s be vain) saving. I want to be out there. I want to do something, for the world, for the people.”That’s why I love and identify with Eowyn. Because she did not bow down and accept her place. She dared, she went and she was instrumental in the victory against Sauron’s army - and along the way she helped keep Merry’s spirits high, and she became a shoulder to lay on for Faramir, and she was here for Theoden when he died. She was here and she was unashamed, proud and herself to the end. And that’s who I want to be.

Cider : a food that you disliked as a child but now enjoy ?

Cauliflower.

Cinnamon : if you had to live in a time period different than the present, which would you choose and where ?

Good question. I often think about that.Paris during La Belle Epoque, 1870-1914. The entire 19th century in general.The 1960s, 1970s and 1980s. Oh how I wish I could have lived the 70s and 80s.I wish I could have been born during Elizabeth I’s reign, in the 16th century, became immortal and lived through the 17th, 18th, 19th, 20th centuries, in Europe. Travelling the “known” world and going to discover the rest of it. Getting a reputation throughout Europe’s royal courts, and getting to know all the civilisations that got fucked over by Europeans before they were destroyed and killed ... Meet Shakespeare, watch the construction of Versailles ...

Maize : share the weirdest encounter you’ve had with a stranger on the street.

Uh. I have a very bad memory and also a few drinks tonight, not helping. Lemme think ...Oh, yeah ! So, 7 years ago, I was finishing high school, living with my grandfather’s, and I would go to and from school alone by foot, a 20-minute walk along a busy road. So one day I was going back home, walking and listening to my music, the usual. And this guy makes signs at me, so 17yo me, still a but naive, a bit too nice, stops and says “Yeah, what do you want ?” (In French of course). And then the guy starts telling me that he’s noticed me and I impressed him (yeaaaah, not weird at all, greAT), and that he has a music band and they’re having a gig in town in the next few days, I’m welcome to drop by, and also he has CDs on him right now, if I want to buy one ... Totally normal things, ya know ? So I tell him, “oh, cool cool cool, um, yeah, I’m a minor and I don’t have no money, and I have to go home, they’re waiting for me” and then I dashed home, making sure I wasn’t being followed, because I may not have had many experiences with creepy men at this point, but I was already hella paranoid and suspicious of anyone. This day I don’t even stop, I pretend I haven’t seen them. Have seen a few men start talking to me and then end up mouth open looking dumb because I just went on my road completely ignoring their existence. Much fun. Anyway. That was my weird encounter in the streets.

Thank you for playing the game !Autumnal asks : ask me

[sk-salazar]

Here are my favorite things and some amazing observations about “Change Your Mind”. Needless to say, there are spoilers.

💖 Those cute rainbow caterpillar bois that Pink brought to Homeworld. And the image in my head of them chasing the Pearls. 😂 Someone needs to draw that.

💖 That DejaBlue pun.

💖 Connie standing up to Mama Blue and using her strict parents to her advantage.

💖 Steven standing up for his support of fusion instead of just giving Blue an empty apology.

💖 Blue realizing that she was wrong to use her emotional manipulation powers on her loved ones all these eons. And her comment about Homeworld failing Pink instead of Pink failing Homeworld. So many kids who defy the status quo need to hear this.

💖 Blue hiding the kids in her hair loop.

💖 The symbolism behind Steven throwing off his Pink Diamond getup and putting on his own clothes to confront White. (Maybe they’re just more comfortable, but I feel like there’s a clear message there.)

💖 Blue saying, “She prefers to be called Steven.” Even if she didn’t use a male pronoun, I can see a message here of accepting your trans kid and defending their chosen identify. Even if it causes a strain in your marriage.

💖 Connie’s courage (again!) to stand up to Yellow. Everyone kept blaming Connie for “blowing Steven’s chance to talk to White” because she fused with him. And Connie’s statement about changing the rules for everyone was the best clapback to that. Steven knows he’s right. Steven knows that servitude is wrong. He knows that denying who you want to be and not loving who you want to love is wrong. So if he is to confront White Diamond, he must do it on his terms, not hers.

💖 Yellow crying of her own volition.

💖 Connie’s “face-off” pun and all the hand puns about the ships. 😂 And Bismuth wanting to uppercut an upper crust. The writing for this episode was 🔥.

💖 Steven saying “GASP!” instead of actually gasping. 😂

💖 Lapis’ and Peridot’s new forms! I’m so in love with Lapis’ palazzo pants and golden sandals! She looks like she has so much more personality now. 💙💚

💖 Peridot saying, “Who needs thumbs?” even tho they’re the reason humans are an advanced species. 😂

💖 Steven’s observation about all his forms. Pink represented the “flight” response and Rose represented the “fight” response. Both of which are primitive responses to conflict. Meanwhile, Steven represents using logic and compassion to foster dialogue. He’s the most ascended form.

💖 Blue saying, “In order to fix [our family], we must admit that it’s broken.” Here, she voices the most common fear of those people who always push back against progress.

💖 Yellow telling Steven to #TakeAKnee . I see what you did there, Sugar Woman. 😏

💖 Yellow having the courage to tell White that “we need to talk about us”. (I love all the throwback references in this episode! One of which is this line, which is a throwback to the episode about Greg and Rose.)

💖 Steven telling White to “let us in your head” or to “get out of your head”. To be “in your head” means that you’re self-centered and unconcerned about the world around you. Again, that 🔥 writing.

💖 Amethyst’s owl pun. 😂

💖 Steven fusing with all the Crystal Gems to save them. Not only was it a great idea in an emergency, but it’s a great plot device. It gives us the answer to our questions about who all the Steven fusions are, thereby making it easier to wrap up the show sometime in the near future.

💖 The new fusions!!! Rainbow Quartz is a posh twink, Sunstone is a positive, 80’s rapper-esque cool dude role model for kids and Obsidian fucking Te Ka.

💖 Rainbow Quartz blowing a raspberry, Rainbow Quartz blasting off with a literal rainbow trail, Rainbow Quartz’s “two stones and one bird” joke. Just, Rainbow Quartz. 🌈

💖 The Crystal Gems forming a cheerleading pyramid to form Obsidian and Pearl doing a Swedish Alps move.

💖 That badass fucking shot of Obsidian’s multiple arms. As well as that epic music they played for her scene.

💖 The Crystal Gems’ new forms. Pearl has completely thrown off that flimsy veil thing that all Pearls have. (Which is a symbol of servitude to her.) And now, her outfit is a lot more conventionally human. (Maybe a sign that she wants to pursue Mystery Girl?) Also, the Star is on her back, representing her putting her past as a Crystal Gem behind her. Now, she’s just Pearl and she just wants to live her own chosen purpose.

Garnet has both red and blue in her corset. After Ruby and Sapphire spent time apart, Ruby realized that she liked being with Sapphire while still being herself. Maybe Sapphire came to the same conclusion. Maybe they both came to the conclusion that they’re not two halves of a whole. They’re two whole beings in one pair.

💖 Bismuth loving Connie enough to make her a custom non-Rose Quartz-themed sword. I love how much she loves and protects the new crew.

💖 The Great and Lovable Peridot declaring that she’s Homeworld’s savior.

💖 As unnerving as it is, I love the way White tries to mess with Steven’s head. She talks about Yellow’s, Blue’s and Pink’s impurities making them dependent on each other. (Essentially, colored diamonds are created because of impurities.) And also how Pink surrounds herself with outcasts in order to be considered normal or good. I don’t agree with any of her statements, but you’ll often hear bigots use the same kind of logic to justify their worldview, which really makes this show hit home in many ways. I have to admit, her words kind of messed with my head, too. For a moment, I had some intrusive thoughts, wondering if I believed what I believe so that I could be “the best of the worst”. I snapped out of it really quick, mind you. But this was an incredibly effective speech.

💖 Amethyst calling White a dirt wad. 😂 She has NO chill.

💖 Again, White Diamond being an absolute villain when she says, “Now I’ve removed all their flaws. Now they are perfect, now they are ME.” This could be an interpretation of God. He sees free will as a mistake because his creations choose NOT to glorify him and NOT to be molded in his image. So many awesome sneak-disses of real people in this episode. 😎👏🏼

💖 Yellow Pearl’s silly Pink Steven line turning out to be foreshadowing. 🤦🏻‍♀️

💖 The palpable representation of self-love in the form of Steven adoring his own form. Also, there’s a throwback to Rose Quartz saying, “Every time you love yourself or you love being yourself, that’s me loving you and loving being you.” Steven really is Pink’s ascended form. The song in the credits is from Pink to Steven.

💖 Rose Quartz and Pink being gone for good. So many stories have characters that come back to life and it seems like death loses meaning nowadays. As much as I love Rose, I’m here for her never coming back. Especially because that represents Pink/Rose/Steven growing and moving on. Just as we never go back to our old, naive selves, neither should Pink.

💖 Steven being equal to White in power, apparently. She was shook with that scream of his! And he took his sweet ass time walking towards his meat suit. That’s power right there.

💖 White saying, “I only want you to be yourself and if you can’t do that, I’ll do it for you.” A perfect representation of people nowadays forcing people to deny their true identities through draconian laws, unwritten social codes and bigoted statements.

(“You do not look like this, you do not sound like this, you are Pink Diamond” = “If you have a penis/vagina, you’re a man/woman.” “That gender doesn’t exist.” “Men and women are supposed to be with each other because...reproduction.” “You can live together, but don’t call it marriage.” Etc, etc.)

💖 The best line in the whole show: “I AM a child. What’s your excuse?” What a sweet, heartfelt way to remind us of the pilot episode, when all this magic got started. 😭

💖 White Diamond interpreted Pink’s “impurity” as warmth earlier. All this time, she thought that being “perfect” meant being detached, cold, unsympathetic, overbearing and cruel. But she becomes more likeable and multi-faceted when she absorbs Pink’s warmth/light. Without it, she’s a creepy, aloof puppet master. But with it, she becomes the same old White that the Diamonds loved. She changed quite easily, so that indicates to me that she felt the need to remove her emotions to become a more effective leader. (Kind of like how people with broken hearts often vow never to love again.) There should be a future exploration on this. Did she remove her own emotions? Did she do it in order to detach herself from grieving for Pink? Or did a higher, more eldritch power do this to her? 🤔 Either way, Pink’s warmth is the antidote to all forms of frigidity. For all that guff about her perfect white light penetrating everyone, she sure got shown a thing or two. 😁

💖 Apparently, Pink Pearl is okay-ish. She probably still has the trauma of being taken from Pink and having her eye cracked. But she apparently has no memory of being controlled. I was so tormented for the last month, wondering if poor Pink Pearl was screaming for freedom, trapped inside her own body. 😢

💖 Steven’s throwback to the song he sung to Lars and Sadie when they were stranded on the island. “If you let others just be whoever they are, maybe you could let yourself be whoever you are” is a throwback to “Let Yourself Just Be Wherever You Are”. It’s also a perfect message to people who rely on bigotry and forcefulness to serve as their whole identity.

💖 Sadie’s green hair. 💚 What a look! And Greg is such a good guy that he’s allowed Sadie and her band to play his song. ☺️ Also, her literal mic drop when the Diamond mothership lands above her. 🤣

💖 The way our perfect cinnamon roll always brings people together. The way he introduces the off-colors to the Diamonds like it’s NBD, like there hasn’t been eons of bad blood between them. And the way White is willing to say hello to them first. What a good grandma. ☺️ It’s funny that earlier on, White said that Pink inspires others to be their worst selves. Yet whenever Steven does stuff like this, it inspires me to be my best self. And many other fans too, I’m sure!

💖 Lars being kind to Lion. ☺️

💖 The off-colors and corrupted-now-uncorrupted Gems finally getting their happily ever after. ☺️

💖 Jasper still retaining a scar of her corruption. Because no one ever comes back unscathed and that little detail makes this story so much more real to us. Also, the way Amethyst explained everything to her, even after the way Jasper had bullied her.

💖 Yellow throwing up some deuces as the mothership was blasting off. 😂✌🏼 There is hope for these Diamonds after all.

💖 Steven’s closing song. What a perfect message to sum up the entire episode. 😍

[surreality51]

On Introversion

Because my Zhu Yilong problem is still not under control, let’s talk about today’s burning question: Why is the poor soul so bad at interviews?

Let’s look at one possible factor: he’s a classic introvert.

What are introverts?

There’s a well-known 2003 article in The Atlantic about “Caring for Your Introvert” by Jonathan Rauch that gives a good overview of introversion with a dash of humor thrown in. A follow-up interview in 2006 provides additional insight and details about introversion.

Common characteristics include:

Extroverts gain energy through social interaction; solitude drains them. Introverts expend energy through social interaction; solitude recharges them.

Extroverts process their thoughts externally (i.e. you hear 80% of what they’re thinking); introverts process their thoughts internally and only let out the thoughts they deem worthwhile (i.e. you hear 20% of what they’re thinking)

Extroverts tend to excel in social situations such as large gatherings, small talk, meeting new people, turning strangers into friends. Introverts tend to excel in social situations such as small groups, deep conversations, meaningful topics and relationships, and people they are comfortable with.

Introverts may struggle with small talk/trivial topics (per bullet #1 above, it’s not worth the energy expenditure), but if you get them going on a topic they find interesting or are passionate about, they might not shut up. You just need to find the right topic.

Note that none of this has anything to do with shyness or disliking being around people.

These are general tendencies/default settings. It doesn’t mean extroverts don’t have quiet moments of introspection, or that introverts never come out of their shells.

Bai Yu and Zhu Yilong are actually GREAT examples of extroverts vs introverts. 

Going back to our question: media interviews are essentially small talk with strangers about trivial topics. NOT an introvert’s strong suit.

Are there interview situations where introverts can excel? Yes! Witness this late-2015 interview with ZYL:

He’s actually talking! With multiple sentences and sometimes even a full paragraph! There are no English subs on this, but some factors that may be why he’s talking more:

It’s a long-form, 45-minute interview, which gives him more time to warm up to the interviewer

The long-form format allows for follow-up questions. Introverts love going deep into topics, rather than hitting a bunch of surface topics.

The interviewer’s style is more conversational, less formal. Again, possibly because the long-form format allows time for conversation.

The questions are more focused on his roles, the acting process, and his thoughts on the acting profession, not on him personally.

One-on-one interview format rather than press conference style

It’s 2015, he hasn’t faced the onslaught of fame yet, so there’s probably less need for him to be guarded

Compare this to how his interviews usually go in 2018 post-Guardian:

More interviews: as his popularity has surged, so have the number of interviews. 

Same questions over and over: What is Guardian about? What do you think of Bai Yu? How did you prepare for the role? What was the most challenging aspect of the role? What similarities do you have with Shen Wei?

Shorter interviews: he’s busier than ever, and with more interview requests, so naturally the interviews must be shorter. Most interviews are 3-5 minutes.

Surface-level questions: because the interviews are short, there’s no time for follow-up questions.

Formal: because time is limited, the reporters must focus on getting the sound bite. There’s no time for conversation and no time to build rapport

Group interview/press conference style: more and more interviews with multiple cameras and mics in his face, rather than one-on-one

Trivial topics: Because reporters are going for the sound bite, they ask more trivial, quick questions about his beauty routine [he’s a dude, why would you ask a dude this question?], memes, hot pot, Weibo, selfies, what he does on his days off.

In short: this is not how you get an introvert to talk.

On top of this, he’s expressed in multiple interviews the importance of keeping the focus on his work and not himself or his personal life. Even in the 2015 interview above, he mentions at the 22:10 mark:

[Host was talking about how she enjoys watching actors/singers/etc. on [variety shows??]. She asks about a recent experience ZYL had on one of these shows. ZYL talks about how he doesn't do these shows much because his personality doesn't suit them. He gets very nervous. But he did one where he was only required to act in a skit, not participate in the games/interview.]

Host: What should we [viewers] do? We really enjoy watching these shows, even if it's really nerve-wracking for the performers.

ZYL: I don't know if you feel this way, but my own impression as a viewer is that, when an actor goes on a lot of variety shows, the audience likes them a lot, but then everyone gets to know the actor too well, they understand him too well. When the actor plays a role that's very different, I don't believe him. You don't believe that he's the character. You recognize his expressions/manners because he's been on all these variety shows too long, everyone knows him too well. So I'm worried that one day people won't believe me if I'm in a role. I will probably want to protect/reserve this part of me.

[Yay for boundaries! Good for him.]

Bottom line: the poor soul is a tough interview nut to crack probably because the interview conditions are not ideal for introverts, and also he’s deliberate about establishing healthy boundaries between what he’s willing to discuss and what he wants to keep private.

ETA: also, possibly my favorite factor, is the whole “I’m just a regular guy, there’s not much about me to talk about, I’m quite boring” bit that’s come up in some recent interviews. Bless him, he’s totally right, but that’s also why he’s a precious cinnamon roll. :D