#look this is all self-indulgent
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18+, pitfighter!vi brainrot, bc its girl-dinner time tw: sorta smut, sorta obsessive!vi, codependent relationship, not quite yandere but the vibes r kinda there, but still fluffy bc im me duh
pitfighter!vi who fucks you like she's trying to leave a part of herself inside you, who holds you so hard that the next morning, you wake up to the blue-tinted ghosts of her fingers along your hips and thighs, the dull blossoming bruises littering your neck and shoulders, rings in the shape of her teeth like strange, demented flowers (or perhaps like footprints) the way they trail along your skin, inked there for all to see.
pitfighter!vi who fights like she's trying to break everyone else in the same way she wishes she were broken herself, all fevered, focused rage, and none of the restraint. no patience, only the blunted sting of a punch well-aimed, an elbow to the ribs, a knee to the groin, spit trailing out the edge of her mouth, a grin crooked and bloody hinged between her lips bc she knows when she looks up and scans the crowd, she'll inevitably find you there, watching her with your wide, alluring eyes.
pitfighter!vi who thinks she knows the depths and widths of hunger, has seen and felt it all, growing up in the lanes, and there are so many different kinds, aren't there? the kind that aches dull and deep in the stomach, the kind that claws and roars open in her chest, the kind that tingles like spider-poison all along the length of her spine. still, she's never quite felt a hunger like this -- the kind that threatens to consume her from the inside out the first time she sees you, and at first, it might've been a wholly vindictive thing -- perhaps its because there'd been something in the shadow of your smile that reminds her of -- well, it doesn't matter.
but the first time she kisses you (in the crush of bodies on a crowded dance floor, the music too loud, the bottom of her boots tacky with spilled drinks and blood and whatever else), you'd run your thumb along the line of her jaw so gently, traced the lines of her face with a touch so soft it ran a fissure through her car-alarm heart, and when she'd pulled away, you'd smiled as if she'd given you something other than just the jagged, broken bits of herself.
later, you'd told her that you still appreciated it then. bc it looked like that was all she could afford to give; and she gave it to you anyway.
pitfighter!vi who does not think she will ever get enough of you, and still, the more she gets, the more you give, the deeper the hunger grows. it yawns open inside her, huge and dark and cavernous, carving into her the more that it's fed, and by the gods do you feed it -- the way your head tilts back to allow her access to the smooth expanses of your throat, the darling, moon-lit landscape of your bare chest and shoulders, the way you're so pliant beneath her, your trust pouring from you like drink. and she drinks. and drinks. and drinks.
drinks till she's head-dizzy and heart-full. drinks till her vision blurs but for the sight of you, the shape of you so familiar to her waking moments it does not shock her in the least the first time she wakes up in the morning to the after-images of you in her dreams.
pitfighter!vi who, for the first time in her life thought she had lost all direction, but now -- she feels like at least there's still someone worth protecting, worth fighting for. and she knows, she knows it's not entirely healthy, how much and how hard she falls for you, knows that perhaps it is not the best thing for a woman like her to make someone like you the still-point of her turning universe, you, who manages to shine despite the grime that collects in the city around you. you, who is softness made into an act of defiance, who, one night, curled against her side, told her that there's a certain vindication to smiling in the face of a world who would love nothing more than to rip the joy, bleeding and raw from your throat.
"it's not always easy... actually," you laugh, the sound sweet as spring water as it trickles over her skin, "it's really fucking hard but... why not do it anyway?"
"what, be happy?" her own voice is low and cracked from the fight earlier that night. but you'd kissed a line down her throat and told her that you loved it when she moaned.
"yeah. if the whole world wants us sad and angry... what bigger fuck you is there than to be... happy?"
pitfighter!vi who lets you draw the dark lines down her cheeks, but they're neater than she'd done them herself, who kisses your fingertips when they're stained with the black of her hair-dye, who laughs fully for the first time in... she doesn't even remember how long, when you lean forward and trace a tiny mustache with the leftover ink on your fingers right over her mouth. who sinks into the sound of your laughter like a warm bath, letting it soak into her sore muscles, unspool the tension coiled in her shoulders, the rictus threatening to settle in the set of her knuckles.
she lets you sooth over the harms and hurts that had followed behind her, nipping at her heels like disobedient dogs her whole life, lets you kiss her brows and pull her behind you as you point at the new graffiti art that wasn't there the week before.
pitfighter!vi who has always had a fierce love for zaun because it's her home, but has never stopped to consider just how beautiful of a place it is until she meets you -- and it is beautiful, an angry, pulsing, rebellious beauty, raw and dripping with shimmer-soaked ichor. a beauty carved of disparate limbs and desperate parts, one that is hard-earned and well-fought, the same beauty found in the darkest hours of night, right before the morning dawns, the same beauty she finds reflected back at her when she sees her blurred reflection in a pool of spilt blood on the fighting pit's arena floor.
zaun hums to the tune of debauchery, and for the first time, she's with someone who allows her to be greedy, allows her the breadth and width of wanting so freely. and she thinks it might be spiraling into a full-blown obsession, the way she can't go three seconds without thinking about you, wondering where you are, what you're doing, what you're up to. and you always tell her, tell her about the flowers you saw growing from a crack in the sidewalk, the shaft of sunlight hitting a shard of broken glass in just the right way, how sometimes if you close your eyes and listen, the ticking and clicking noises that run like a baseline thrum through the entire city almost sounds like birdsong.
pitfighter!vi who can't say she's ever fallen properly in love (she thinks that perhaps, once, she got real close), but wonders if this is what it feels like, to feel the void of your physical absence like the itch of a phantom limb, so she does everything she can to keep you close, glares at people if their eyes linger too long on you as the pair of you walk down the street, doubles down on her training regime so that she can fend of anyone who even breathes wrong in your direction.
who can't help pouting every time you pull away to do anything -- to grab another bag of snacks, to ask the bartender for another drink, to listen to something loris is saying -- she has to tamp down the urge to pull you back, to meld you to her side and never let go.
pitfighter!vi who starts to get more strategic with her fights, who saves up money now bc she wants to take you out to dinner, or just buy you nice things once in a while. who spends way too many hexes and cogs on a bouquet of fresh flowers, ones that aren't tainted or bred with the faint, sickly shine of shimmer, and she thinks its all worth it to watch the smile break across your face like dawn over a brand new day -- brilliant, blinding.
she blinks, watching with a fond smile as you fuss over the flowers in your tiny apartment, the space small but cozy, everything neat and in its place. you put the flowers into a tall, slightly chipped glass mug and set them by the window, admiring them from this angle, then that.
"y'like them, angel?"
you nod, grinning as you throw your arms around her, "i love them, vi! i love them so much!"
"good. i'm glad you like 'em. just..." her voice trails off; you cock your head.
"just, what?"
she shrugs, "ah -- just, i always thought it was sad getting flowers cause... they'll wilt someday, right?"
but when she looks back at you, still caught up in her arms, you're still smiling. and there's a fox-fire glint in your eyes that makes something in her stomach twist hot.
"well, there's one kind of flower that won't wilt that i wouldn't mind having here all the time..."
vi blinks, a dry heat creeping up the back of her throat, her heart a wild, fluttering thing caught beneath her cage of ribs.
"yeah?" her voice is hoarse as she swallows around the hope pooling on her tongue like blood. "and what kinda flower is that?"
you lean in, your breath a whisper along her parted lips.
"violets."
pitfighter!vi who moves in three days later, with nothing but some old clothes and her punching bag, which you'd already made room for (somehow) hung up from one of the high rafters in the kitchen, next to the tiny dining table tucked into the corner. who spends the next three days fucking you on every available surface (and some unavailable ones, like against the fridge for instance), telling you that it's only right to christen things now that you're officially living together.
who doesn't bother to wonder if things are moving too fast, and dives in head first because that's the only ways she's ever known to how to do things. who thinks, blithely to herself one night, the warm shape of you curled next to her, sleeping so soundly it almost breaks her heart, that you're probably the first good thing she's ever gotten stuck on -- and she's gotten stuck on a lot of things (fighting, boxing, the guilt, the shame, the anger, the world-ending sorrow of losing it all). its one of the things vander had always warned her about.
"you get into things too hard, kiddo -- gotta learn to pace yourself."
but she doesn't care, because hard's what she was raised on, and it's how she plans on loving you, god, if it's the last thing she does, right or wrong, so be it.
pitfighter!vi who still has her bad nights, still drinks a bit too much sometimes, but at least you're always there to keep her from going too far. and you're the only one who can pull her back, the only one she'll listen to when you tug the drink away from her hands and slide it down the bar towards loris, who'll eye it for a second before downing it and settling up the tab, nodding towards you even as you sling an arm around vi's middle to lead her out of the bar.
who still wakes up screaming some nights, her eyes wide and unseeing, scrabbling at you, tugging you into her if only to bury her face in your shoulder, her whole body wracked with dry-heaving sobs.
"my sister used to think there were monsters under the bed, and make me check down there every night before going to bed," she murmurs, her face inches from yours, her words soft and ever so slightly slurred.
you brush your fingers against her cheek, a comforting, repetative motion -- back and forth, back and forth, till her lashes flutter shut.
"guess she was right... but the monsters never wanna stay under the bed, do they? it's like they always... wanna come out and play..."
you let out a breathy laugh, "or maybe," you offer, your voice low and soothing, "they're just as scared as you are. and they're just looking for someone to scare their own monsters away."
pitfighter!vi who is still not good at slow, but sometimes, when she kisses you, she wishes that had the power to hit pause on time, just so she could stretch out the moment and kiss you forever. she thinks that she'll never be good at patience, but sometimes, when you tell her just gimme a sec! when she's waiting for you to get ready before going out to dinner at jericho's or just for a round of drinks at the bar round the corner, her leaning against the doorway watching as you put the finishing touches of your makeup on yourself in the kitchen mirror -- she thinks she'd give you every last second of the rest of her life if you ever asked her to.
pitfighter!vi who, recently, has really, really started hoping that someday soon, you'll actually ask her to.
taglist: @traiitorjoe @rizzscary @wetcat020 @alex-thegiraffeboyy @nanasemo @saturnhas82moons @unear7hly @drsnowrose @grantaires-waistcoat @isab3lita @ally-all-around @starrysetup22 @lipsent - join the taglist
#⛈ monsoon season#this is my essay titled: SEE LOOK I CAN FIX HER HERE IS THE PROOF#♨ steamy#arcane#vi x reader#vi smut#arcane smut#wlw fanfic#arcane vi smut#vi x you#arcane x you#vi arcane fanfic#x reader#lesbian#to say this is self indulgent would be such a heinous understatement lol#but yes i can fix her just gimme a chaNCE I PROMISE I CAN DO IT GIMME#this started out as like a weird love letter to pitfighter!vi and also to zaun bc i do not think they get enough love (in the show)#and also i have a thing for the beauty in brutality and love as an all consuming obsession and both those things r tru in vi so#also like my toxic trait is actually absolutely wanting like fucking the JUMIN HAN equivalent of a lover like#yes be SO obsessed with me that you want to lock me in a cage be SO obsessed with me that i consume ur every waking thought
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10 years in the future for Nanako-chan
#nanako dojima#persona 4#yu narukami#ryotaro dojima#tohru adachi#a little sister... a LITTLw sister. you expect me to not fawn...? to not crumble? ok....#go on. look....... go on. GO ON!!!!! (crazed) (eye twitching) (i like these 4 and nana-chan especially)#hope you like my older design for her...#funfacts i said on twitter so i'll put on tags here:#adachi did his time in jail quick. yu's 27 and still looks the same. pretty bancho#i think nanakos signature color would change from pink to yellow. yu doesn't actually wear any yellow at all in p4g IIRC#but it is a color you associate him with the most. i want nanako to adopt that color. BUUUTTT#for self indulgent's sake she does wear pink to get yu to dote on her more. (reminds him fondly of baby nana-chan)#(AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!)#oh yeah and adachi's a hag. i think his fashion is handpicked by yu probaably.#(thinking if i missed anything else) ahhhh........... nanako-chan... return for p6 or something. ok byeee!
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completely innocuous vash sheet :) fr practice
#my art#trigun stampede#trigun#vash the stampede#trigun vash#trigun stampede fanart#trigun fanart#vash fanart#STILL dont know the tags gomen ill do research one of these days#anyway . 4 gd days later hes finally done#here is what i am learning . i love his design sm. but jesus CHRIST#all the individual elements r so time consuming i want to tear my face off. im slowly getting more familiar w the arm but God.#im so peeved at how long this took but i am trying to cut myself some slack. remembering tht his design is a 24 hour endeavour#and i drew 4 of him#3 of which being fullbody 2 of which being foreshortened 1 of which being a Maid Dress#the price i pay fr self-indulgence.....the price i pay fr [redacted]#this started out as a treat fr me n it became my purgatory#but it is DONE and now i can look at vash in a maid outfit and tied up and jacket off turtleneck Out and shirtless and- *is shot dead*#anyway huge shoutout to mey rin black butler fr being the og Maid With Gun#stole the thigh bustle from a panel of her it was just too good#anyway take it enjoy the fruits of my labour enjoy him i am . exhausted.
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hyunjin trying to grab felix's cat ears 🫳🏼🫳🏼🫳🏼
#hyunlix#felix#hyunjin#stray kids#skz#bystay#skzco#hyunlixsource#mine*#gifs*#hyunlix: mine#hyunlix*#this set is EXTREMELY self indulgent#hence why it looks a/ss#can they please get a better quality camera to film their dance practices 😭#ANYWAYS THESE TWO ONCE AGAIN HAVE ME IN SHAMBLES#which honestly it doesn't take a lot for them to do#they can just stand next to each other and i'm on the floor gushing#he's doing what we all wanted to do#one of us FR
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it’s an elgar’nanomenon!
#uh huh he's through with all these hyper mega bummer fen'harel's like you#elgar'nan#two different songs but#self indulgent nobody look at me#i just think blight daddy is neat!#dragon age#datv spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#*my gifs
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Listening to Ado sing is a religious experience
Also happy pride! Snuck some bi flag colors in here for the occasion 🌈
(no reposts; reblogs appreciated)
#my art#artists on tumblr#digital art#fanart#one piece#uta one piece#ado#pride#idk how to feel about this one tbh#but it was a very self indulgent painting btwn all the other stuff im working on#anyway the inspo is that ive always loved looking at concert photography#with the crazy lighting and colors#so i had to try it myself!#and im so late to this convo BUT#LETS TALK ABOUT ADO AS UTA#if (sort of) evil why voice so good#tot musica / where the wind blows / world's continuation are my favs#psa pls click for quality#tumblr im begging u to stop blurring everything
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🫳🏻🫳🏻🫳🏻
#this shouldve been a 268px set by all accounts but i wanted him HUGE to look at. so.. big self indulgent cheols it is#choi seungcheol#seungcheol#seventeen#svtcreators#svtedit#svtgifs#usersvt#usersemily#heysol#fornini#cheytermelon#*#*sc#i cant even talk about how these make me feel..
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hear me out - i think leon and nihilego would be a fun combo
their designs compliment each other well lol
(i like villain au ideas though, so i may be biased, aesthetic wise)
#art#pokemon swsh#pokemon sword and shield#pkmn swsh#pkmn sword and shield#champion leon#poke's doodles#pokemon sm#pokemon sun and moon#pkmn sm#pkmn sun and moon#nihilego#ultra beasts#uhhhh soooooooooo this is one of those reaaallll self indulgent pics lol#i wasnt gonna post it but i think it looks coollll#the context is also. super specific but.#summarise - i like the idea of angst and drama so a plot where somehow people and pkmn get fused by accident is---#a fun concept for me - especially when it leads to good guys becoming bad guys unwillingly in a way---#so i have a buncha doodles in my notebook of ultra beasts and characters being mixed up because im biased and love the ultra beasts lol#eternatus is also my second pic for this kinda plot--#nihilego is just a really cool pick for me SINCE it converts bad emotions into good ones for the victim#like. if the person does bad things they feel worse but technically Better because of nihilego's influence and thats such-#- a fountain for potential tbh#pasio is a good pick for a setting too due to all the different regions being together-#hold on im rambling too much about something so self indulgent sry lol
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"My beautiful star."
#mp100#mob psycho 100#teruki hanazawa#terumob#shigeo kageyama#my art#???%#i drew this ages ago and finished it today because i finished arcane#and my mind is a flurry with thoughts and ideas and i already have so many intertwined souls ships in my head and spiritual beings#i felt like I had to finish this today#I share this head canon that Shigeo's ???% body starts to look more and more like the depths of space as he ages.#this is very self indulgent#just for me (and for marina)#hi marina hehe#I love it here#my goal for next year is to try and be unapologetically my authentic self#which means sharing all the art I love even if it may not fit into what I think others want#or what will be popular#rambling in the tags as I delay hitting the post now button
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Snap: *draws a Megaman-inspired Magneto*
Me: ...Perfect modernization.
wait now that its not 3AM i can do you one Slightly better
bonus:
#xmen#xmen comics#magneto#erik lehnsherr#erik magnus lehnsherr#max eisenhardt#snap sketches#this is legitimately the most self indulgent thing ever ive been wanting to draw magneto like a robot master for months vjAELKJAE#i thought about adding the little 'ears' robot masters/reploids have but not this time#whats funny is that during my initial redesigning i WANTED to pay homage to erik's trench coat look buuuutt i couldnt figure how#so thank you sigma for. letting me steal your shit vjELKAEJ#i havent drawn megaman characters in like. years good lord- whats funny is that magnetman Was one of my faves to draw#which doesnt mean much since i loved drawing pretty much all the robot masters equally LMAOOO#i remember some freak got pressed at me for doodling metalman during class once like dawg what is your problem#bruv leave me ALONE let me draw you are not my mom#anyway. as i said last night i dont have my usual evening class so i figured id fill the time doodlin these#they didnt take long- i think thats why i like drawing This magneto outfit so much#reminds me of my megaman doodlin days ... also it's genuinely just quick as hell WHICH. makes sense#all that done im done megaman-inspired posting thank you for the opportunity anon im glad you appreciated it :]]#im gonna go eat now my tummy rumblin. theeeeeeen i guess ill drive home ???? i guess.#it's almost saturday so that means i get to post more asks- ive been hoarding them throughout the week#so i apologize if some people have been waitin i PROMISE i havent been ignoring i just wanna draw somethin for it </3#ok im eating now BYYYYYYEEE
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fucking kill me
#making an oc then making a self insert is insane levels of pathetic its actually so fucking embarassing#i want to put a gun in my mouth and shoot myself then eat all of my organs and then dig a hole to bury myself into the ground#but i actually like the drawings kinda idk#also hihi get it sadie and macy#bc yk.. sadist masochist.... ok yea its bad i didnt know what to name them ok#when people tell me its ok to be self indulgent and i actually make shit specifically catered to me#🤯🤯🤯🫨🤯🫨🤯🫨🤯🫨🤯🫨🫨🤯#WHATEVER. STOP LOOKING AT ME.#my art#frayocs#sadie#macy
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SOPHIE NÉLISSE as SHAUNA SHIPMAN YELLOWJACKETS -> 1.05 Bloodhive
#yellowjackets#yjedit#yellowjacketsedit#shauna shipman#shaunashipmanedit#sophie nelisse#96yellowjackets#yellowjacketsnetwork#yellowjacketscentral#yellowjacketssource#antlerqueer#tusercj#tusermiles#userbeckett#tvgifs#tvedit#another self indulgent shauna gifset from bloodhive? my my what a surprise#you know what she looks like? MY GIRLFRIEND#OH TO BE JACKIE TAYLOR IN ALL THESE SCENES.....#**gifs
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🍎⚔️
#THIS TOOK FOREVER. WORTH IT BUT OH MY G O D. the only background that isnt complete. the part behind azul fades to nothing#so this was a ton of work but Also is the most self indulgent of them. lots of little treats just for me. all for ME!!!!!#me making sebrid malledeuce idirollo and jamiruggie dance together. bc i can. bc i said so. neige alone. for fun.#its okay i paid the price of having to draw like 13 ppl in masq uniforms#twst#twstファンアート#twistedwonderland#twstsilver#epelfelmier#rookhunt#sebekzigvolt#riddlerosehearts#neigeleblanche#deucespade#malleusdraconia#ruggiebucchi#jamilviper#rolloflamme#idiashroud#azulashengrotto#silver u are gorjus. he looks so pretty here like look at him#suntails
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death stranding au because ds2 trailer made me shameless and forced me to draw this idea i had in my head for months. sorry this won't make sense unless you've played the game...
#people be like what do you daydream about i daydream about replaying DS and also rotating this au in my head#SIGH THIS IS SO EMBARRASSING BUT ILL MAINTAG THIS... despite this is the most self indulgent thing ive drawn... wallahi#goodtimeswithscar#pearlescentmoon#grian#mumbo jumbo#hermitcraft#咸鱼.jpg#please no cc find this i will delete my blog in embarrassment#i still need to draw the other characters but my hand is cramping so bad. head in hands and screaming#this is what raw unmedicated unadulterated adhd looks like btw#ill draw more of this definitely and maybe make a post again compiling all the art because rn im just posting this so i can ramble. sigh
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some rather strong first impressions were made.
required reading for the magical "voice" headcanon and another for starstruck's signature in particular. asked by @trainerbob23 !
#did i need to do a 9 page comic for this... well who knows. i had this scene in mind for a long time and wanted to do it justice!#important moment for both of them. you can see starstruck just generating the bandee shaped mental illness in real time.#and bandee resolving to be her point of contact with waddle dees if the others can't handle it#he is after all; the strongest and the bravest and the best of them.#“what is this signature like” it's like meeting something that has a human face but you can tell it is Not Human. think: uncanny valley#it also took her quite some time to pick up her own voice. she could not speak (popstarian) on her own for a while#she does not mimic anymore though if she can help it because it tends to weird others out and she wants to avoid that!!#it's not like a fun or enjoyable impersonation; it's like a perfect recording on a device.#also i guess this is *finally* the reveal of the 'hospital' mentioned previously that folks noticed and also like... her name 😂#anyway.... thank you to everyone who voted for starstruck in that poll and has encouraged this insane self indulgence... wow.#never thought i'd get to draw stuff like this and have others look forward to it. i really hope you'll enjoy this!!!#my art#my comics#starstruck dee#bandana waddle dee#gravitational collapse
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Bodyguard and Bossman
#Hajime hinata#Fuyuhiko kuzuryu#Sdr2#Super danganronpa 2#Danganronpa 2#Danganronpa#Kuzuhina#Idk lol. Bodyguard Aus of any kind are just always fun#Idk if I'll be happy w this later but I'm living in the now#Someone tell Fuyuhiko nonone wears a hat and a coat to the club#Someones ass is NOT even attempting eye contact in this picture#An art#I am not immune to self indulgence. Far from it. So indulgent#Dont look at the anatomy at all I hate it the more I look
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