#look at that I didn't even have a full ten people to tag
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we don’t play about halloween | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x fem reader
max doesn’t play about three things: formula one, his cats and his girlfriend’s love for halloween
MASTERLIST | TIPS
yourusername
liked by oscarpiastri, maxverstappen1 and 607,344 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: yes we dress up to carve pumpkins, it’s rude if you don’t.
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user1: gosh they are so cute
user2: did max just dress as himself whenever he’s within 5ft of y/n?
maxverstappen1: i get why the americans don’t play about the statue of liberty
yourusername: i think they should build one of you in zandvoort
maxverstappen1: and they still wouldn’t worship it as much as i worship you
yourusername: i literally light candles in your name and pray for you with you mum, i think i worship you more sorry
maxverstappen1: the ONLY loss i’ll take
user3: i feel lonely year round because of them but it’s SO much worse during halloween
user4: they are the definition of the couple costume they invented it and they PERFECTED it
landonorris: i thought your apartment was a safe space, why did i get harassed over my costume?
yourusername: it was more of the lack of costume? “streamer” does not count
landonorris: who actually dresses up to carve pumpkins?
maxverstappen1: COOL PEOPLE
yourusername: imagine not dressing up and having an awful pumpkin … could never be me
landonorris: STOP BULLYING ME
maxverstappen1: do better then.
user5: obsessed with how peace and love y/n is for the whole year but as soon as someone doesn’t care about halloween it’s fight time
charles_leclerc: remind me to never accept an invite to a halloween event at the verstappen-l/n household - far TOO much stress
yourusername: but you’re like the only one who deserves an invite to next year because the air max costume slayed
maxverstappen1: i might even let you back on it
charles_leclerc: might???
maxverstappen1: follow me on instagram
yourusername: 2019 was so long ago we really need to move on
danielricciardo: you seriously underestimate just how petty these men are
maxverstappen1
liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 894,560 others
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: halloween is a full family affair
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user8: JIMMY AND SASSY I CAN'T
user9: yall looking at the croissant and the lobster i'm focusing on AMY AND NICK?
user10: has max even seen this film?
maxverstappen1: nope i just like doing the costumes y/n wants to do
user11: i wish i had enough friends to have like ten billion halloween parties
oscarpiastri: i didn't know what to expect but i did not think i was going to see alex trying to drown george at the apple bobbing station
yourusername: i let them work out their own mess as long as they don't accidentally flood our living room again
oscarpiastri: AGAIN?
maxverstappen1: f1 drivers are just competitive about apple bobbing as they are about driving
alexalbon: in my defence there is a sick trophy for the champ i simply cannot let anyone else win it
user12: they got a trophy made? and girlies are serious about this?
yourusername: custom trophies for apple bobbing, pumpkin carving and best costume
alexalbon: three time apple bobbing champ right here
charles_leclerc: i'm coming for best costume this year
danielricciardo: pumpkin carving was an easy dub last year
maxverstappen1: but no one has out done us for costumes thus far
yourusername: and that's not bias, there is a democratic voting process x
user13: i need to be in this friendship group right now
yourusername
liked by georgerussell63, maxverstappen1 and 723,409 others
tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: it's the most wonderful time of the year ! thanks to everyone who came out and making the spooky season special. p.s. shout out to max who found this wig while going through our costume box and insisted on not taking it off the whole set up.
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user16: NOOOOO WHY IS HALLOWEEN OVER ALREADY
user17: rip to all of us who were hoping for a sexy y/n x max costume
user18: they heard we wanted sexy and gave us ratatouille i hate their asses
oscarpiastri: okay so lando wasn't lying when he said you guys go insane for halloween
yourusername: i fear not. i hope you enjoyed your dip in the pool, we found you in a guest room in my bath robe at 3am
oscarpiastri: oops.
maxverstappen1: you fared better than others on their rookie halloween appearance, just ask lando and charles
landonorris: you told me there was no alcohol in the jelly so it's not my fault i ate the whole bowl and threw up in your shower
yourusername: wow way to blame the victims there lando, you literally blocked the drain
landonorris: MAX SAID THERE WAS NO ALCOHOL
yourusername: it was labelled with the ingredients. you just can't read
landonorris: no comment
yourusername: and charles got so drunk that he decided he would sleep on the couch but got 'lonely' and insisted on cuddling with us
charles_leclerc: Y/N!!!! YOU SAID YOU'D KEEP THAT A SECRET
maxverstappen1: don't worry we thought it was cute
carlossainz55: wait is that why you came as a "cuddle bug" this year?
charles_leclerc: NO
alexalbon: and that must be why he got best costume RIGGORY
yourusername: no riggory here, you and lily as mavis and jonathon were a close second
user19: i won't rest until i have an invite next year.
maxverstappen1
liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername and 821,309 others
tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: sorting the recycling with your head barely attached is always the worst part of halloween
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user20: drunk max looks like so much fun
yourusername: i think i might drink my weight in coffee today but i need to see the kitchen floor soon before i lose my mind
user21: ma'am i know you're clinging to life rn but can we know who won what?
alexalbon: ALEX ALBON APPLE BOBBING CHAMP FOUR YEARS IN A ROW
charles_leclerc: i won best costume and it's purely because i'm cute cause NO one there knew about my cuddling escapades last year
landonorris: ugh pretty privilege back at it again
charles_leclerc: jealousy is a disease get well soon
oscarpiastri: my pumpkin ended up winning !! turns out people love a kangaroo in the ghostface mask
maxverstappen1: first rookie to win that title (i am so impressed by the kangaroo)
yourusername: you were actually so good you have to help me with all the decorative ones next year
oscarpiastri: i'm in
user21: but who won the real award - most embarrassing moment?
maxverstappen1: daniel got stuck in the door in his inflatable horse/cowboy costume
danielricciardo: NO esteban dressing as the cheese string man was worse
estebanocon: that's real creativity at least i didn't fall asleep in the bath like carlos
yourusername: not to gang up on carlos but the blanket you took in their is damaged beyond repair and i request a replacement
carlossainz55: fair, but it was me, lando and george in the tub
georgerussell63: fake news @carmenmundt
carmenmundt: i was also at the party babe, it was impressive how you all fit in there
user22: the fact they do all of this and race like two weeks later and the teams just deal with it
maxverstappen1: we've done much worse on race weekends
yourusername: someone didn't have to try and get home after abu dhabi 2021, halloween is nothing compared to that
note: a lil halloween one for you all. i also DO NOT PLAY ABOUT HALLOWEEN. and am currently planning my costume lol. just wanted to get a small one out before all my work comes in tomorrow, much love xx
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1#f1 x you#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen x you#max verstappen instagram au#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen
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Can i request Karina x Male Reader office sex?
Cubicle Rival
Karina x male reader
tags: nipple play, fingering
Nearly everyone in the building had left for the day by ten minutes after fifteen; the janitor had even switched off the lights on purpose to prevent anyone from working overtime. Karina and you remained in the same room where they'd been working; the woman had taken off her blazer and was draping it over the back of her chair, while the man had rolled up his long sleeves to his elbows. As long as their report received approval and they could return home, their looks held little concern.
"Mr. Ethan hasn't replied?" Karina asked you since you had been refreshing your email. Waiting for the first message in their inbox determined whether they could go home early or stay in the office longer.
"Not just yet.” Perhaps sloppily or exhausted, you respond, "It's still being checked."
Karina says, her tone unpleasant to hear: "It's half past eleven; is it crazy that Mr. Ethan still wants to check the report?"
"Why are you anyway blaming Mr. Ethan? You know he is a perfectionist. He promised to wait until today; hence, he will wait until twelve. You are the one who is wrong; why would you hand over such a critical report to an intern who is already on his way home at five? It's not going to be right," you ramble, drawing visible eyebrows furrowing on Karina.
"Why are you blaming me? Blame Ms. Je for putting the director's daughter in our division. What do you think I can do if she's nagging me to do a report? Tell her you can't do your job like that?" Karina started pounding on the table; maybe both of them were already tired, so they were more sensitive and easily ignited.
"You could try pointing the finger at other people. You brought Mr. Ethan and now Ms. Je; pointing fingers at others won't make them do anything or prevent such incidents in the future. Do you also intend to hold the intern responsible, given his obvious ignorance in preparing the report? Indeed, it is your responsibility to consider this matter. How can a child, lacking any knowledge, solve such a significant problem? You, equally irritated, began pointing at Karina as if assigning blame.
"Now you're blaming me?"
You didn't have time to reply to Karina's words because a call came into your cell phone from Mr. Ethan.
"Yes, sir? Yes, thank you very much, sir. I'll send it later. I will finish it in 15 minutes. Thank you very much, sir." You disconnected the phone and looked at Karina. The man sighed softly before saying to karina, "The report is okay; I just need to check for typos. I'll finish it first. Can you get me a coffee?"
Karina was silent for a second before responding, "Fine."
Upon seeing Karina exit the office, you instinctively shut your eyes.
Although Karina was really terrified to visit the pantry by herself since all the lights had been turned off, she couldn't resist your demand so that everything would be finished rapidly and she could head home. Under low lighting, she began preparing two cups of coffee in paper cups, using a combination of saset coffee and sugar, to ensure you wouldn't have any complaints about the taste. She carried the black coffee paper cups with both hands, but her foot stumbled on something, and one cup of coffee spilled on her chest. "Ah." Karina turned to show a faint smile. Indeed, it appears that she has paid the price for all her mistakes over the past year. Why is this so unlucky?
She took off her shirt, which was full of spilled coffee, and then she walked back towards her office.
She gently opened the door, and she found you closing your eyes and leaning on your chair. Okay, the initial plan was for Karina to stealthily walk to her cubicle, retrieve her blazer, and put it on before you woke up. Karina then crept over, set the coffee she had produced next to your laptop, and hurried to her cubicle.
You blinked up at the scent of coffee, but your attention quickly went from the paper cup on her desk to the figure of Karina, who was unclasping her bra. Fuck.
"What on earth are you doing?" you inquired, your voice quivering with disbelief.
"My shirt is all sticky from spilling coffee," Karina answered, her bare back now showing.
"Are you not afraid of me doing anything to you?" You asked while getting up from the chair to get a box of tissues. The man was now sitting on Karina's chair, and you could clearly see the girl's large, saggy breasts. While the woman sat at her desk.
"You and I fight every day; I doubt you have any desire to do anything to me, even though I'm naked in front of you right now," Karina replied confidently.
"Do you think if I were naked in front of you, you'd be horny?" Your question made Karina snort in annoyance.
"No, it's crazy to lust after you," Karina said, folding her arms across her chest, making her breasts pop out even more as if challenging you.
"I have submitted the report, and Mr. Ethan accepted it. You raised one eyebrow and said, "All that remains is your business with me."
"What business is it? I have nothing to do with you. Better turn back; my body is all sticky and a little blistering thanks to the hot water dispenser," Karina said, looking down at her coffee-sticky chest.
"You're sure you won't lust after me, right?" you asked again.
"No."
"I'll just clean it so it's not sticky and then go home," you said. "Shut up." You looked down and swept your tongue over every inch of Karina's breasts to clean the coffee off her skin, occasionally giving the man a light sip.
"What the hell are you doing?" Karina tried to keep your head from coming closer to her body, but then she froze as the tip of your tongue rubbed against her nipple. Damn. It was so good.
"They say it's better to use saliva or running water when it's hot." You soaked Karina's upper body, including her skirt, with the remaining water from the glass she used to drink.
"Fuck, what are you doing? I swear.. I'm wet.."
"Wet, huh?" You lowered your head and took one of Karina's nipples into your mouth, sucking gently, while your other hand wiped Karina's body with a tissue.
Karina bit her lip, both hands clutching the edge of the table she was sitting on. "You won't lust, right? There's no way you'll lust after me; after all, I'm just cleaning you."
"Hurry up and clean it.. I'm going back." Karina's words made you smile.
You took a tissue and, using both hands, rubbed Karina's nipples with it. While closing her eyes, the girl looked up. She hadn't felt a touch on her body in a long time, so a touch like this sent her into a trance. Indeed, your skill level is beyond reproach. Just observe how the tissue continues to twist both Karina's nipples, creating a more pleasurable sensation. You idly pinched Karina's nipples so hard that she couldn't help but moan.
"Don't be horny; I'm just cleaning it," you said half-mockingly.
"I'm not fucking horny." Karina's answer made you laugh. You pulled down Karina's panties and let them fall to the floor.
"It's just wet," you teased with a finger that had rubbed Karina's pussy. "I'm just cleaning it; you don't want to feel uncomfortable."
"What the hell are you doing- ahhh ..." Your tongue entered to explore Karina's pleasure hole with your finger stroking the small object on it, creating a stifled moan from Karina's lips, which made you smile because, after all, Karina's sigh had made you win. You deliberately inserted two of your fingers, then scratched Karina's pussywall rather roughly, causing her affection to shift to her clitoris. "A-ahhh.. ahhh.."
"Why mm? Is it good? You said you wouldn't lust after me, but you're so wet, Rina." Karina stared resentfully at your face as she bit her lower lip, deliberately holding back a moan so as not to feed your ego. "Why do you want to end it?" you asked, bending your two fingers precisely at Karina's weakest point, and soon her pleasure juices melted away.
"Damn you.." said Karina in the end, while catching her breath.
"1-0, there is no need to deny that you are also horny for me," you said with a chuckle, and you lowered your head to lick Karina's pussy, which had just reached its release.
"Watch out; I'll get you back."
"I can't wait," you replied as she helped put the blazer on Karina's body.
#idol smut#aespa#fanfic#girl group smut#imagines#aespa smut#karina aespa#karina smut#yoo jimin#gg x reader#yoo jimin x reader#karina x reader#karina x male reader#aespa x male reader#aespa karina#aespa x reader#aespa x you#girl group x reader
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redamancy | steve harrington
Summary: redamancy (n.) - the act of loving someone who loves you back; a love returned in full // or, four times you kissed Steve Harrington, and one time he finally kissed you back.
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Word count: 5.2k
Warnings/tags: friends to lovers, 5+1 fic format, no use of y/n, FLUFF, PINING PINING, injured s4 steve, hospital setting, general vecna angst (eddie's alive bc i will never kill eddie in my fics), bed sharing, happy ending, and kissing. if that wasn't clear. :)
A/N: fun fact: this is the first time i've written a 5+1 fic! technically it's 4+1 but whatevs. if you enjoy this fic, please give it a reblog and support your local steve harrington tumblrina.
divider by firefly-graphics
i. the promise
"Would you ever get married?"
You open your eyes. The setting sun nearly blinds you through the windshield. Immediately, you stick out a hand to block it.
You're still reclined all the way back in the passenger seat, because Steve's fancy schmancy BMW can do that. He frequently lectures you about doing it while he's driving. Have I taught you nothing? Road safety!
"I mean, I guess so," you say. "If someone ever wants to put a ring on me."
You sit up and pull down the sun visor. Steve turns. His hair lightens in the summer, shades of reddish blond peeking through. He insists his hair has never been anything but brown, fiercely pledging his allegiance to brunettes. You coo at his highlights all the same.
"I want to," he says after a minute. "I wanna get married."
You're parked down the block from your house. You should've gotten out ten minutes ago, but there's never any rush when you're with Steve.
"The line to wed you will be out the door, champ," you say around a grin.
"Hm. I dunno." He stretches in his seat. "Maybe if I was the same guy I was a few years ago."
You wrinkle your nose. "I doubt that."
"But what can I really offer?" he continues. "I'm just some guy who can't get into college."
"That doesn't mean no one will marry you. Some people who go to college are dumber than dirt. They get married. College has nothing to do with it. You can go, if you really want to. One rejection doesn't say anything about you, Steve."
"I guess."
You pull the lever on the side. The seat shoots up with a brrrap! It clicks as you straighten.
"Where did all this come from, anyway?" you ask.
Steve shrugs. "Just thinking."
"Dangerous."
He smiles. "I like to live on the edge."
"Contemplating marriage like the world's biggest sap. Definitely edgy."
Steve hums. His hands are in his lap. He picks at a cuticle, a habit he’s recently developed. You wonder why he’s so anxious.
"Two people from our graduating class got married last week."
Your eyes widen. "You're kidding."
"Nope. Lisa Schell and Gary Brewer."
"Wait, didn't she cheat on him?"
"Yeah, but he slept with her sister, so I guess they called it even."
You shake your head. "That's insane. They're literally babies, Steve. That's like Dustin getting married."
Steve scowls. "He's not allowed to get married before me."
"Not even to his possibly fictional Suzie?"
"Not even to her."
You stare at the freckles on Steve's face and how his frizz kind of looks like a halo in the light. You imagine the feel of his hair in your hands, the warmth of his scalp.
"I'd marry you," you say.
Steve's eyebrows shoot up.
"What?"
"Like, if you were in a pinch."
He looks at you sideways. You flatten, then scrunch your hands over your knees. Your tongue feels too big for your mouth.
"I'm talking about spending the rest of my life with someone, you know. Not borrowing fifty bucks."
"Fifty bucks is a lot of money for some of us, Harrington."
"That’s probably how much Lisa's wedding dress cost."
"I hope she kept the receipt."
Silence descends. A soft breeze blows through your cracked window. You want to search Steve's glove box for gum, but you've just told him you'd marry him, so you can't do anything except think about the fact that those words came out of your mouth.
"Are you…" Steve begins, then pauses. "Why did you say that?"
"Because you're worried, for some incomprehensible reason, that no one will marry you."
"I scoop ice cream for a living."
You level him with a look.
"Steve. We're kids. Cut yourself some slack."
His eyes turn hollow. They've been doing that lately. You wish you knew why.
"I don't really feel like a kid these days," he says.
Something about the way Steve sounds makes you want to climb over the console and curl into him, cradle his head to your neck. Which is crazy. You guys don't do that. Steve isn't yours to do that with.
"Let's make a pact," you say softly.
He meets your eye. "A pact?"
"Mmhm. Let's say if both of us aren't married by… thirty, then we'll get married."
"Well, I don't want a pity marriage."
You roll your eyes. "It's not a pity marriage, Steve."
"Thirty is so late! You really think I won't be married by then?" he asks.
"No, I don't think that. I already said folks will be lined up to marry you," you say.
"I can't wait till I'm thirty."
"Or you'll turn into an old maid?"
"Meh meh meh," he mocks without any heat.
You purse your lips so you don't smile. "Fine. We'll split the difference. Twenty-four?"
Steve considers that. Really considers it. It suddenly occurs to you what you're promising and who you're promising it to. You wonder if you'll both forget about it. Or brush it off. Oh, what did we know? We were kids!
Except Steve doesn't feel like a kid. And maybe you don't either, as much as you wish you do.
"Do you mean it?" he asks.
"Of course I do."
"No, seriously." He's serious. "I mean it, so if you don't…"
"Steve, I said I mean it. I do."
"You'll marry me?"
"I will."
"Swear on it."
You hold out your right pinkie out, waiting. Steve hooks his finger over yours. Impulsively, you kiss your linked pinkies. To show that you really, truly mean it.
You try to picture it. What walking down the aisle to meet Steve at the altar would feel like. You wonder if he'd keep his hair long, like it is now. You like it long. Would he keep it long for you?
"Will you buy me a ring?" you ask. "If we get married, I mean."
"Of course I'd buy you a ring," Steve says. "I'd get you anything you wanted."
"Okay." Your heart hammers in your chest. "I'm gonna go home."
"Alright. Want me to pull up to the door?"
"No, it's fine. Walking is good for digestion. Those milkshakes were no joke."
Steve smiles. He has such a lovely smile. His Cupid's bow is shaped exactly like a heart.
"Same time tomorrow? It's movie night."
Right. Your movie night. A semi-regular occasion that includes you, Steve, Robin, and the kids, sometimes. You've watched at least a dozen movies this summer together. Only this time, you're watching a movie after promising to marry Steve.
"Sounds good," you say. "Will you pick me up?"
"Always."
Another promise. You hadn't realized how many Steve makes to you.
"'Kay. See you."
You get out. Steve waves as he pulls away from the curb.
Your ring finger feels bare. You rub it, hoping the feeling will go away.
ii. the wound
The plastic chair has turned your legs numb. Your butt is about to follow.
Can butts go numb? You're not sure. You'll find out soon, though.
You rub your eyes. God, you need sleep.
Across the room, you catch Joyce Byers' gaze. She smiles at you, though it's brittle. You try to smile back, feeling distinctly like you might break if you stretch your mouth too far.
She looks away, and your not-smile falls.
"They'll let us in soon," she says, like she knows. She does know. Better than you, certainly.
The hospital smells cold. It smells like a place people go to die.
Your heartbeat ratchets. You shouldn't think like that.
"You don't understand," comes Dustin's voice. He's at the receptionist's desk, flanked by Mike and Lucas. Dustin's face is red and blotchy, near tears.
"I need to see him. You won't let me see Eddie, so—"
The receptionist rears back, like she can't believe three children are daring to speak to her.
"Neither patient is cleared for visitors," she says icily. "Now, for the last time: have a seat."
Out of the corner of your eye, you see Joyce begin to stand, ready to herd the kids away. You beat her to it. Out of everyone in this room, you're probably the only person who has the strength to stand.
"Guys, c'mon. It won't be long."
They don't look at you. You don't take it personally. An hour earlier, you'd cornered Dustin and forced him to tell you what happened. What's been happening.
So he did. And now you're here.
You don't blame them for glaring at the prickly receptionist. But you know that won't do anything. It won't heal Steve quicker. And it won't make anybody feel better.
"Hey, Dustin." You lay a hand on his shoulder. He looks at you like you're not Steve. You wish it was you in surgery instead.
"Come sit," you say.
"I need to see him," he tells you.
"I know." Your throat tightens, threatening to trap your words altogether. You rush to get the rest out. "I do too. But this isn't going to make that happen faster. Come sit with me. Okay?"
"He'll be fine," Mike says quietly. "They don't wanna get sued by his asshole dad."
You nod, because yeah, good point. Quite possibly the first time Richard Harrington has brought anybody comfort. He's in Cancun, last you'd heard. You hope he chokes on a margarita.
Dustin follows you. Mike and Lucas sit next to Joyce. The five of you wait.
At some point, you fall asleep. When you wake up, it's to the contentious receptionist peering over you all.
"Mr. Harrington is awake," she says primly. "You may see him now, young man."
Dustin flies out of the chair, Lucas and Mike at his heels.
A part of you wants to go home, and you feel terrible for it. You feel terrible that Steve almost died, but you're the frightened one. You don't know if you can bear to see him tied to tubes and a heart monitor.
"Go on."
Joyce tracks you sleepily. Her hair is more knotted than before you fell asleep. She nods to the hallway.
"Go see him."
You can’t voice every thought, every fear. I don’t know if I can see him like this.
“It’s good he won’t wake up alone,” she says.
“He’s got a family.” You wave your hand weakly.
Joyce watches you for a moment. Then she gets up.
"Yes, he does."
She holds out her hand.
You don’t know Joyce Byers very well. This is probably the longest conversation you’ve had with her. You realize, then, that you're wrong—you’re not the one who’s strong enough to stand.
“Let’s go see him,” she says. "All of his loved ones should be there."
God, are you really that obvious?
You take her hand, and the two of you go down the hall.
Steve is nearly unrecognizable in the hospital bed. The kids are speaking to him, unusually quiet. They look up when you enter.
Steve’s eyes lock with yours.
“Hey,” is all you say.
“Hi,” he says, voice rough with disuse and getting choked by what Dustin had described as demon bats.
“Boys, come on,” Joyce calls. “Let’s make a cafeteria stop.”
You see Dustin about to protest, but Lucas tugs his arm like he knows, and goddamn, you really are that obvious, aren’t you?
You wait for the door to close behind you. Then you walk to Steve’s side.
The gnarled ring of flesh around his neck makes you queasy. The rest of him isn’t much better, red and purple smeared across any skin that’s not covered by the chalky hospital gown.
You sit in the chair. It’s the same plastic kind as the ones in the waiting room, but this one doesn’t feel so hard.
“Robin called me,” you say.
Steve closes his eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, you’d better be.” Your voice cracks. “Can’t believe you went dimension-surfing without me.”
“You’re mad at me.”
Your breath is punched out of you.
“No,” you say softly. “My God, Steve. I’m not mad at you.”
His hand creeps to the edge of the bed. His fingers are scraped.
You take his hand and lace your fingers together. He slow-blinks. He’ll probably fall asleep in the next half hour.
“It’s okay if you are,” he whispers. “Mad, I mean. I’d be mad too.”
You know he wouldn’t be, though. You know Steve would forgive you in a heartbeat.
“I’m not mad,” you say, equally as quiet. “I just… I was scared."
He nods. "I'm sorry for scaring you."
You bow your head and close your eyes. When Robin had called, you'd run to the bathroom and coughed up stomach acid.
They say he’ll make it, she'd told you, and you'd realized with violent clarity that you love him.
But Steve doesn't need that right now. So you bury it.
You lean in and bring Steve's knuckles to your lips, taking care not to jostle him.
His eyes widen. Part of you hopes he won’t remember this conversation.
"Don't do that again," you say. “Not without me.”
"Okay,” he whispers. “I won't."
You wait until he falls asleep, hand in his.
iii. the brand
“There’s no way I’m getting in your death van, Munson!” Robin whines.
“Death van is an exaggeration, Buckley. If anything, it’s a life van. I’m still here, aren’t I?” Eddie asks.
“Definitely not because of that heap of metal,” Steve murmurs to you. You snicker.
It’s nearly dark, but a summer dark, where it doesn’t actually turn to night until well after nine PM. The top two buttons of Steve’s dress shirt are undone, and you can’t stop staring. It’s embarrassing, really. You’d nearly missed Eddie’s walk across the stage because of that damned triangle of tanned skin and dark chest hair.
“Why can’t we take the station wagon?” Robin asks.
“I think Nancy already left,” you say. “Sorry, Rob.”
“And I’ve put my car jacking days behind me,” Eddie announces, flinging his arms out. “So my van it shall be!”
Robin whips her head around to glare at Steve.
“This is your fault,” she accuses scathingly.
“Me?!”
“You just had to go and get a flat tire yesterday.”
“Yeah, Steve,” you add cheekily. “Why couldn’t you have foreseen the dreaded timeline where Eddie drives?”
“Et tu?” Eddie asks. “I’m hurt. I’m a great driver, y’know. Better than Steve, some have told me.”
“Dustin only told you that ‘cause you were high on morphine and about to burst into tears,” Robin says.
As they bicker, Steve draws closer, so your arms brush. You close the distance, crowding him.
“Y’okay?” he asks quietly.
“Yes,” you say, startled. “Why wouldn’t I be?”
“Just checking.”
“Are you okay?”
He turns to you. He looks like he’s searching for something. You don’t know what.
“Yeah,” Steve says after a minute. “I am. Better than, actually.”
“‘Cause I’m here, right?” you ask with a gooey grin.
“Yeah. ‘Cause you’re here.”
He sounds honest, so you turn away, because you can’t handle that and his chest hair.
"I should get to choose where we go," Robin says as you arrive at Eddie's van. "Since it may be our last trip and all."
"Funny you were in Band and not president of the drama club, Buckley," Eddie says dryly.
"Pot, kettle."
"How 'bout Rita's?" you suggest. "Unlimited refills and no one will hassle Eddie."
"Aw, you care about little ol' me?" Eddie asks.
"If you get us there in one piece, yes."
Eddie huffs. "No wonder you and the Hair are like this." He crosses his fingers.
"Damn right," Steve says. "We even finish each other's—"
"Terribly cliche sayings!" you say.
Robin looks at you for a moment, unusually smirky. Then she looks at Steve.
"You match. Blue dress, blue tie."
"That's so if she gets lost, they know who to return her to," Steve says.
You scoff. "More like the other way around."
He pouts. "Hey."
"Hay is for horses," you sing, skipping ahead to Eddie's van.
"I'm sorry, are you excited to ride in the Hell Van?" Robin asks.
You shrug. "We could use some excitement around here, couldn't we?"
"No!" all three say.
"I've had enough excitement for ten lifetimes," Robin mutters.
Eddie pulls the door open. Your smile quickly drops.
"Uh, Eddie? Where the fuck are the seats?"
"Right, so, usually I only have Gareth and Jeff ride with me. Gareth always calls shotgun—"
"Shotgun!" Robin hollers, and races to the front seat.
You stare at the single backseat chair. There's no way it's big enough for you and Steve.
"Holy shit," Steve says, taking stock of the "backseat."
Eddie rubs the back of his neck. "Yeah… listen, if I'd known we'd be taking her, I would've put the other seat in, swear! Usually we take it out for the equipment."
"Well, what are we supposed to do? Lay down and pray? This is how people get head injuries, Eddie," you say, arms folded.
"Maybe we can call a cab," Steve suggests.
"At this hour?" You shake your head. "No way. This isn't Indianapolis."
"Oh my God." Robin groans. "The solution is so obvious. Sit on Steve's lap. Boom. Now come on, I'm starving."
You tense. Steve is tactile, sure, and you've become acclimated to that over the years.
But this? This is way, way beyond that.
"Uh…" Steve glances at you. "Do you… I mean, if you don't mind?"
You glance at Eddie, who's got the tiniest smirk. You glower and he clears his throat, hiding his mouth behind a lock of hair.
"I don't mind," you say, more confident than you feel. "It's a short drive."
Eddie nods. "Definitely. I'll step on it."
"Please don't step on it," Robin calls. "We're already chancing fate by letting you drive in the first place."
Eddie huffs, walking to the driver's side. "Y'know, Buckley, you are just…"
You look at Steve. He smiles at you, sweet as always.
"This isn't gonna aggravate any injuries, right?" you ask. "Me… sitting on you?"
You wince at the wording.
"No, should be fine. My PT gave me the all clear a month ago."
You nod tightly. "Right. Okay. You go first."
Steve climbs in, planting his feet on the floor. You go next, stooping in front of him. You catch each other's gaze for a moment. Then you laugh, suddenly trying to look anywhere but at Steve.
"Right, so I'll just…"
You slide onto Steve's lap, trying to hold some of your weight so you won't crush him. He splays an easy hand over your belly and leans over to pull the van door shut. Your heart thunders in your chest.
"You can sit back, y'know," he says, breath tickling your ear. "’M not made of glass."
"Didn't want your legs to go numb," you joke weakly.
Steve makes an unhappy noise and tugs you back so you're fully seated on him. You angle yourself so you can look at him. Steve looks up at you, lightly tracing a pattern on your hip. Like you do this all the time.
"Hi," you say, too jittery to crack another joke.
Steve smiles gently. "Hey."
His tone is fond. You feel sick.
"Everybody good?" Eddie asks.
He adjusts the rear view mirror and you watch his eyebrows shoot up in the reflection.
"You two look cozy."
"Shut the fuck up, Munson," you mumble. "Just drive, already."
Eddie giggles like a gremlin in reply and turns the ignition.
It’s not bad, at first. Eddie takes it easy driving through Hawkins. Part of it is because he doesn’t want to attract attention. The other part is that Hopper promised Eddie a night in jail if he caught him running the stop signs again.
You personally think it’s a bluff. Robin does not; she’s enthusiastically annoying about road safety, and points out every single sign and red light. This causes Eddie to start slamming the breaks in retaliation.
“Holy fuck!” you yelp when Eddie hits the breaks particularly hard. “Eddie!”
Steve is quick to tug you backwards, considering you’re not belted. You scramble to grab his shoulders and twist to look at him.
“Thanks,” you say breathlessly.
He smiles, then leans away, glaring at the front.
“Really, Munson?”
“She started it!” Eddie insists. “Blame your BFF!”
“Can you drive like someone who doesn’t have a death wish?” Robin shoots back.
Steve’s hands are now on the small of your back and on your hip, respectively. Your legs hang over the side of the carseat, butt nestled quite firmly on his thighs.
God, you’re never living this down.
“Y’okay?”
Steve’s breath in your ear makes you squirm. You turn to look at him.
“Fine,” you murmur. “I’m not crushing you, am I?”
“No,” he says. “Don’t worry.”
Eddie breaks again, harder than before. You slip.
Steve reacts instantly, his hand grabbing the meat of your thigh. Your dress rides up, so it’s skin on skin.
The momentum is worse, however, because you jerk back. Right into Steve’s face.
Your nose mashes into his, which isn’t great. But then, your lips smush against his cheek. When you pull back, there’s a smeared lipstick print.
Maybe you’re the one with a death wish.
Robin is screeching incoherently but you can't focus on anything but the smudge of pink on Steve's cheek. Your chest feels tight.
He looks like he's yours.
"Yeah, we're fine, " Steve says, voice close enough to startle you back into the conversation.
He looks up at you. Your hand lands on the lipstick, like if you cover it, it'll go away. Steve tilts his head, mouth open in a question.
"Sorry," you rush out before he can speak. "I got some of my, uh, lipstick on you."
He relaxes.
"Oh. Thought I was bleeding or something," he says with a slight laugh. "'S okay, I can wipe it off when we get there."
"Uh-huh."
You drop your hand. You can't stop staring. Stop staring.
The print isn't exactly in the shape of your lips, but it's close. You can see the divots and where your lips parted. If someone were to see you two, they'd assume a lot of things you're not.
Steve's collar is wrinkled from the van ride from Hell. His neck is flushed. You wonder how your lipstick would look there.
Eddie presses the brake, softer this time. Steve's fingers dig into the meat of your thigh anyway. More marks.
"Alright, relax, gang," Eddie says. "We're almost there."
You touch Steve's cheek again and hope he'll forget to wash you off of his face.
iv. the secret
It's raining. You're in Steve's bed.
Thunder shakes the sky. You curl further into your—Steve’s—pillow. It smells like his soap and detergent.
You used to like the rain. Not so much these days. Rain makes you think of blood on asphalt and being alone at twenty-four. Rain silences you.
"Do you think he'll come back?"
You've never dared to ask anyone. Not even Joyce. She'd know. She wouldn't tell you the truth, though.
Nancy Wheeler probably could. She'd face you with that steel brow of hers and give it to you straight.
Yes. The monster's back. You're not getting married.
You slip your hand into Steve’s. He squeezes your fingers. Outside, the rain roars.
"I don't know," Steve says into the darkness.
You can't see him like this. It makes you mildly claustrophobic. Maybe you should turn on the hall light.
"Hopper said he was dead. So did that other guy—uh, Murray. And like, Eddie's okay. And Max. El would tell us if she sensed something. It's not like he could come back without making a sound. I mean, from what she told me, she basically, like, unraveled him from the inside out. Which is pretty gross, but also a good way to keep someone dead."
He's rambling. He's rambling to distract you.
God, what the fuck are you going to do when you're twenty-four and unmarried and Steve's forgotten all about you?
"I don't want anyone to die," you whisper.
Steve squeezes your hand harder.
"No one's gonna die."
You shift closer. You can barely make out Steve's silhouette. The ends of his hair tickle your knuckles.
"Hey," he says, and you try to find his eyes, but you can't. "Nothing's gonna happen, okay?"
"Yeah," you say, even though something did happen, something that almost took him away from you, and you don't know if you can handle that again.
"You can stay here as long as you want," he says.
"I can go back to my room."
Steve threads his fingers with yours. You can't see his eyes but it's okay.
"Don't," he says.
"Okay."
You scoot forward, closing another few inches between you two. Now, you feel Steve's breath on your face. He smells like minty toothpaste. He is alive.
The rain batters against the windows. You could kiss him. You could kiss him right now, and no one would know except for you and him.
His breath has begun to even out. You lean in blindly. Your lips land on his hair.
It's hardly a kiss. It’ll be your secret anyway.
+ and, finally, the first.
"Dustin wanted chocolate milk," you say, not looking up from the tub of yogurt you're searching the date for.
"Yeah," Steve says, parking the cart to the side. "Kid's addicted."
He opens the giant fridge door and a burst of cold air nips at your arm. You shy away.
"Six dollars? Jesus, does it come from gold cows?"
You snort, finally putting the yogurt in the cart. You stay at Steve’s house more often than not these days, so there’s no point in getting a separate cart.
"What?" Steve asks, looking at you.
"You're funny, that's what."
"I am?"
"You sound like somebody's grandpa."
"I do not!"
"Do too," you say sweetly.
"Do not."
"Do too infinity."
Steve rolls his eyes.
"Yeah, whatever. I'm a grandpa 'cause I don't wanna spend a leg and an arm on chocolate milk for the little shit? So be it."
"Steve," you begin, eyebrows drawing together. "It's his birthday. Have a heart, old man."
"Oh, good grief," he mumbles, but he takes the carton and puts it into the cart.
You smile. Steve shakes his head.
"This is why I don't go shopping with you. You're an enabler."
"I am," you say happily, walking alongside him as he pushes the cart.
"And you don't push the cart."
You tut. "Pretty girls don't push shopping carts, Steven."
"Oh, they just find some poor sap to push it for them, huh?"
"I'm so glad you're on board," you say, skipping ahead to the chip aisle.
You look through the shelves and land on two types of Doritos. Cool Ranch and Original. It’s a tough decision.
“Steve, what do you think?” You hold up the bags. “Which do they like better?”
“Ranch. According to Mike, liking the original flavors of snacks is lame.”
You snicker and take three bags of the Cool Ranch. Steve pushes the cart to you.
“I feel like we’re shopping for our kid,” you say. “We’re the awesome house everybody wants to visit because we have the best snacks and the biggest pool.”
You look up when Steve doesn’t reply. He stares at you, expression unreadable. Your smile dims.
“What?” you ask.
Steve shakes his head.
“Nothing,” he says quietly. “It’s nothing.”
“Steve, seriously. What is it?”
He shakes his head again.
“Nothing, really. Just zoned out for a second.”
He continues to push the cart down the aisle. You watch him for a moment, then follow. The two of you quickly check off the remaining items on Steve’s list (yes, his actual, physical grocery list), and then you check out.
The cashier smiles at you both in line. She’s an older woman, with the typical poofy blowout nearly every woman over fifty gets at Brenda’s Salon in downtown Hawkins. You busily put the items on the conveyor belt while Steve takes out his wallet and makes conversation with the cashier. It’s a good routine you two have established.
When the cashier’s done, you squeeze past the cart and grab half of the bags. Steve takes the receipt and the rest of the bags.
“You two are very sweet together,” the cashier says, her round cheeks blush-red like apples. “Have a wonderful day.”
“You too, ma’am,” Steve replies, and heads to the exit.
You’re frozen for a moment, startled until Steve calls your name. You heft the bags in your arms and hurry after him.
Steve stops and takes two of your bags before crossing the parking lot.
“Steve,” you say, and huff. “I can carry them.”
“Pretty girls don’t push carts or carry bags. It’s the rule, remember?”
You watch, unimpressed, as Steve then proceeds to try and get his car keys with an armful of grocery bags. When he almost drops a bag for the third time, you sigh and take pity.
“Which pocket?” you ask, snaking your arm around.
“Back left,” he says, smiling sheepishly.
You roll your eyes, feeling disgustingly fond. You shove your hand down Steve’s back jean pocket. He wiggles his eyebrows at you.
“Take me out to dinner at least,” he says.
“Pretty boys don’t get taken to dinner until the pretty girl has been asked out properly,” you shoot back.
Steve smiles, but the joke doesn’t land like it usually does. You step away as soon as you get the keys, clearing your throat.
“Well, I hope you’ve learned your lesson about carrying all the bags, Popeye.”
You open the trunk for him, then go to open the passenger side door.
“If I don’t carry all the bags, how else am I meant to show off to the ladies?”
You pull the handle on the driver’s side for Steve and he gets in, beaming cheekily at you.
“The only person who’s watching you make a fool of yourself is me, big guy,” you say. “So, mission failed.”
You open the glove compartment and start fishing through for gum. You find a Juicy Fruit packet but it’s empty.
“Damn, that’s what we forgot,” you say, defeatedly crumpling the cardboard. “Gum.”
You start to turn to Steve. “Do you think we—”
You’ve wondered, probably more than you should, about how Steve Harrington kisses.
Now you know: tenderly.
He cups both sides of your face, and you have to brace yourself on the center console for balance. Your other hand tangles in his hair. It’s as soft as you imagined, free of product, and you scrunch the baby hairs at the base of his scalp. Steve makes a quiet noise.
You kiss until you need air. Even then, Steve doesn’t let you go far. You part with only an inch or two between you.
“There’s gum in the middle compartment,” is the first thing he says.
“Huh?”
“In here.” He pats the compartment between the seats. “Hubba Bubba. I got it last week.”
You giggle and grab Steve’s face with both hands. His hands slip to your arms and he squeezes, smiling gently.
“What?” he asks.
“Fuck, I’m glad I know you,” you say.
Steve kisses you again. Two. Steve Harrington has officially kissed you two times.
You hope you’ll lose track at some point.
#steve harrington x reader#steve harrington x yn#steve harrington x you#steve harrington fanfiction#steve harrington imagine#steve harrington x y/n#steve harrington fluff#stranger things fanfiction#stranger things x reader#stranger things#stranger things x you
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Tease tidbit Tuesday
Tagged by @diazsdimples
Had this idea last week. I hope to write it soon as it's little idea, but it's me and it's uni time so. Anyway fic that for now is called Tommy doesn't want kids(or does he?):
“You know pout and look at your coffee cup won't help make your coffee taste better,” Josh smirks at him when he enters the restroom but then changes his expression to a more serious one. “Relationship problems?”
Buck just shrugs. It's not a problem, they are not fighting, but his heart and brain work too much.
“Wanna share? I'm a great listener. Helping people with their problems is my job.”
“Tommy and I had a talk about the future. He mentioned his deal breaker and…,” Buck sighs tugging his curls. “If it be anyone else I know I would say his deal breaker is opposite to mine and we're not going to last, but…”
“But you didn't,” Josh ends for him and Buck just nods.
“Why?”
"Because… because I want to be with him and now I'm not sure what I want more: Tommy or having kids. I don't want to lose Tommy. But I'm so sad because I want kids, especially after I was a donor and I-I don't know how to choose. I love Tommy so much, but I'm not sure if I love him more than giving up this dream."
"You need to think about it a lot, Buck. Make sure you won't change your mind in 2 years”
“I know. That's why I came to see Maddie.”
“Can I say one thing?”
“Yeah.”
“Imagine yourself in ten years. In two situations. One you have kids but no Tommy,” Buck's heart cries in pain and he can't even really picture this. Only two little kids with blue eyes but they have Tommy's electric blue, not his baby blue iris. “Now imagine yourself in ten years married to Tommy,” and Buck does.
He pictures dinners with wine, laughs and dances to their playlist of songs that they love. He pictures the backyard full of flowers, berries and trees that they put there. He pictures the dog they would get. Maybe even two. He pictures smiles when they wake up together with Tommy kissing him till he can't breathe but ready to give up air. He pictures himself happy, even though he doesn't have everything he dreamt about, he has Tommy and…
Oh. I guess it is. My secret to happiness.
It's Tommy.
“I think your face told me anything I need to know about your choice.”
“Yeah, I'm sure it did,” Buck smiles. “I'm still a little sad. I had a whole list of names that go good with Kinard and Buckley-Kinard.”
Josh chuckles. “Oh, I'm sure you did. And I think it would hurt. Some days more than others, but if Tommy is more important for you, you can do it.”
“Yeah. Not every dream comes true. But I don't want to let Tommy go away.”
Josh smiles at him, “Can I give you another piece of advice?”
“Please, you're really good,” Buck smiles at his friend.
“Tell Tommy about how it was a deal breaker for you. He needs to know. Don't hide it from him.”
Buck nods.
Tagging @wikiangela @hippolotamus @theotherbuckley @bewilderedbuckley @queerbuck @queerdiaz @repressedqueen @racerchix21 @pirrusstuff @powersuitup @monsterrae1 @saybiwithme @evanbi-ckley @epiphainie @typicalopposite @tommybuckleykinard @devirnis @lavenderleahy @leashybebes @bigfootsmom @cliophilyra @cal-daisies-and-briars @watchyourbuck @peppermintquartz @ohithankyou @honestlyeddie-im-bi @honestlydarkprincess @half-oz-eddie @hyperfocusthusly @visioninacone @bi-buckrights
and anyone who wants to
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My Love, My Life
Pairing: Tech x Jedi!reader
Word count: 1,063
Tags/warnings: angst, grief/mourning, there's alot of signs of autism shown in Tech in this fic but less obvious ones.
Summary: After finding your name in the Imperial obituary, Tech doesn't know how to move on.
A/N: How many aura points do I lose for crying while I wrote this even though it's not that good? I was originally going to have a part two of the reader's perspective where it's reveal that oh my god you're actually alive, but I dont know whether to do that now purely because of how deeply Tech is shown to be grieving and I kinda don't want to take that away from him. Yk what I mean? But if people say they want a part 2 who am I to deny them? Also, yes, the title is based off of that one ABBA song cuz I was listening to it while I wrote this.
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The Marauder was tingling with tension. The genocide of the Jedi, the betrayal of the Empire, the loss of Crosshair and the gain of Omega all happened over the course of twenty-four hours. Everyone had their own reasons to be on edge.
Tech's mind had been on autopilot for days. As soon as he saw what Master Billaba's men did to her and how quickly Crosshair became bloodthirsty for all Jedi, time seemed to stop. He had frantically typed on his datapad to try and find an explanation for such a brutal attack. When Tech saw that it was a full fledged genocide, he swore his heart stopped beating for a second. The only thing that kept him from having a panic attack was his advanced biology.
When they got to the Marauder and fled Kamino, Tech was instantly searching the Imperial database for the list of the dead. He never thought he'd have to check an obituary to find your name, but there you were. Jedi Knight. Executed on Lothal. The reference image they used for you was haunting. To see you stood there, just so alive, with the word executed next to you was enough to make bile stir in his stomach.
It didn't feel real. Tech looked at your information in the obituary again and again and again, but his mind just couldn't process the information. He felt like the only way he could believe you were dead is if he saw your body laying before him and he could never bring himself to do that.
Everyone noticed the difference in their brother. Even Omega, who hadn't even been with them that long, noticed his irregular behaviour. His brothers were puzzled by his reaction to their new living situation. Out of all of them, Tech should be the least likely to get emotional over this. Then again, change has alway been a problem with Tech. It always takes longer for him to process things like this.
They began working for a trandoshan called Cid to do some seedy work. It was obvious why Hunter made them work for her, obvious to Tech anyway. It was because being sent out on missions that have various conditions is all they ever knew. The concept of settling down on a planet and ignoring the war raging on outside is foreign to them.
It's been ten months, three weeks and five days, since your death. Tech's behaviour hasn't changed and his siblings have assumed it's all because of Crosshair up until this point. Tech had been understanding with Crosshair on Kamino and held only mild hatred for his decision.
No. This is something else entirely.
Hunter's heart aches at seeing his brother's despair and having no idea what's making him feeling this way. Tech being Tech, will never say.
He finally snapped when one of Cid's workers, Phee, persistently kept making moves on him. Tech couldn't help the pure emotion radiating off of him in waves, as he shouted and yelled at the woman. It should be you laughing at his sarcasm, it should be you calling him pet names, it should be you with him. He just wants you and that's the one thing he can't possibly have and it hurts, it makes it feel like his heart has been ripped straight out of chest.
Tech stormed off to the Marauder which was a mistake, because everything in there reminds him of you. Your first kiss on his bunk, your late night conversations in the cockpit, your shared experiments at his desk.
He wants to scream and yell at how unfair everything is. Out of everyone in the galaxy, why you? Why did death have to take you? His perfect cyar'ika who could do no wrong and managed to cling to the little faith you had left through the most devastating battles.
Grief is something Tech has experienced only a handful of times. The feelings still feel new and uncertain and that unnerves him. Tech's emotions are usually filed away in organised compartments that only he understands. Now, everything is overflowing and overlapping. Everything is too much.
It's like a bad dream. He doesn't want to be here anymore. He wants the comfort of a familiar routine, back when his biggest concern was what days him and his cyar'ika would be on shore leave at the same time.
Tech sinks down into the far corner of the bunk room, ripping off his goggles and letting them clatter agaisnt the durasteel floor. He draws his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around his shins, before leaning his forehead agaisnt his kneecaps.
The last time he found himself in this position was back when he was a cadet. As much as he tried to ignore it, the regs had gotten to him. 99 had found him curled up in the corner of an embryo lab. He had said nothing at first, just sank down next to him and let him know that he was there if he needed him. Tech found himself wondering for years why he couldn't have been like everyone else, why the Kaminoans made his mind work this way. Tech would give anything to be "normal". He never asked for any of this.
A set of footsteps stomp their way up the ramp and Tech doesn't bother looking up. He's prepared for the demanding yells, the overbearing questions and the looks of outrage on his brothers' faces. What he isn't prepared for is someone sliding down the wall next to him. Tech almost flinches at the feeling of someone placing a hand on his back and tenses all the muscles in his body instantly. Eventually, his body goes back to being lax and a shaky sigh leaves Tech's lips, as he leans into his brother's side.
Tech doesn't want to talk about you to his brothers. If he talks about it, then it's real. Your body is rotting on Lothal and he'll never see you again. He can't face the reality of it. It's too real. He can't do it.
The hand on his back rubs soothing circles into his spine. I'm here, if you need me.
Someday, he will tell the tale of his beautiful cyar'ika and you'll become an honoured part of their mismatched family, even though they had never met you. You will forever live on in his heart.
#Tech x reader#Tbb tech x reader#Tech#Tbb Tech#Tech tbb#Tbb x reader#The bad batch x reader#x fem!reader#x female reader#x gn reader#x m reader#x male reader#x f reader
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jeon jungkook ♡ series masterlist
wc. 2k
tags. smut | dom top!m!reader, in an alleyway, exhibitionism + getting caught, jealousy, rough sex, biting, crying
thursdays at a nightclub – most would expect a half-alive sort of creature, mostly empty and a little dull. but the nights never sleep and neither do its people, and the building is warm with electric bodies and the sweet, heady scent of spilt alcohol.
jungkook squeezes out of the crowd on the dance floor, releasing a lungful of thick air as he meanders towards the bar. he'd lost you a few minutes ago, and nothing was as fun as grinding on his boyfriend in a dark room full of strangers. he takes a seat and orders a drink.
not a second later, a presence slides up behind him. "what's a looker like you doin' all alone?"
his welcoming smile vanishes. that's not you. he glances over his shoulder at the young man, who looks so generically attractive that jungkook feels as if he's an instagram filter become reality.
he turns away, disinterested. he scans the crowds. "i'm not alone. here with my boyfriend."
"really? where?"
there's a grating smugness to his words. he's probably never had anyone say no to him before. "we got separated. this place is pretty big."
the guy hums, leaning against the bar next to jungkook. "that's true. he probably won't find you for ten minutes, maybe more. not thinking of spending all that time sittin' alone at the bar with just a whiskey to warm you, are you?"
"i am, actually."
"well, maybe i could interest you in something else," he suggests, "to pass the time."
jungkook lifts the glass to his lips, throwing it back. he hisses at the pleasant burn. "yeah, no. i'd rather watch paint dry."
"oh, i'm not that bad," he jests. his fingers slide over jungkook's bicep, gorgeously accentuated by the neckline of his black racerback tank. it's fitted and cropped – he did it himself – and shows off his tight stomach and defined apollo's belt. "you wouldn't even have to look at me, y'know. those hands of yours would make a nice necklace, don't you think?"
he glances down at his many silver rings and bracelets. "oh. oh. uh, i don't think you're reading me right. um, i don't swing that way."
the man's brows furrow. "what? you said you had a boyfriend."
"i do." jungkook clears his throat, carefully sliding off of the barstool. the other man's eyes follow him up; jungkook has a few inches over him. "i, uh..."
"there you are, baby. thought i'd never see your face again."
jungkook positively lights up at the sound of your voice, smooth and pleasant. it's the kind of voice that cuts through boardroom chatter like a hot knife through butter, carrying with it a natural, easy assertiveness that ceos wish they had.
"hyung," he coos, giggling as you drape an arm over his shoulder and tangle that hand in his long, messy curls, tugging slightly to press your lips to his cheek. he lets you move him around like a doll, grinning up at you adoringly. "hi."
"hi," you reply, amused. your eyes flicker over to the other man, whose face is slowly turning red. your eyes narrow slightly. "sorry, i don't think we've met. i'll be stealing him for a minute."
you're usually so polite – but this time, you didn't even add an 'if you don't mind' to that second sentence. jungkook nibbles on his lower lip. are you angry? are you angry at him?
"hyung?" he asks when you lead him outside into the alley, the cool breeze soothing his hot skin. "what's up?"
you turn on him. his eyes widen. "he was flirting with you, wasn't he?"
"what?" he fumbles. "w-well, i mean, yeah, but you know i wasn't gonna do anything if that's what you're worried about—"
"i don't care about that." something in the back of jungkook's mind swoons at the knowledge that you're so secure in his affections for you that it doesn't bother you in the slightest. you lean in, pressing a hand against the rough brick wall and pinning him in. his heart begins to race. "i care that he thought you were available. all this skin you're showing and not a single mark defining you as mine?" a slight growl marks that last word. jungkook gasps softly. "we'll have to fix that."
"now?" jungkook stammers, glancing around. the alley's dark, and the streets on either side are mostly quiet. a few haggard-looking youths stumble by every so often. "but what if someone sees? my dignity, hyung, you're gonna rip it to shreds."
"i'm 'gonna'?" you lift a brow, eyes glittering. "you sound as if you want this."
he swallows. "i – i do, i always do, but i don't want anyone getting an eyeful of my ass..." he hooks his fingers through your belt loops. "that's just for you, hyung-ah."
you hum, leaning in. you press your lips against his and he moans softly, tugging your hips flush against his. "that's right, baby. you're just for me. all this..." you squeeze his ass roughly over his black cargo pants and he whimpers out a moan, arching his spine into your touch. "all mine. why?"
"'cause you fuck me the best," he gasps, wrapping his arms around your shoulders as your hot kisses travel down his jaw and collar. his cock stirs. "you fuck me so well, baby. i could never want anyone else when i have you. i belong to you – hey!"
you yank his teasingly tight pants down over his thighs, pinning him in place easily with your own body. he's already half-hard – has been for the last hour in the club – and you hum appreciatively, gently turning him over. he obliges, arching his spine as he gazes watchfully over his shoulder, pink lips parted and palms pressed against the wall.
your hand runs over the tight silver-ringed harness that cradles his chest and shoulders and emphasises his tiny little waist. you nearly growl at the sight, nails digging into his skin.
he presses his ass into the front of your pants, round eyes sparkling with anticipation. "you're being so rough," he breathes as you nip at his neck just below his ear, tugging the fitted neck of his top down to reveal more of him. "did that really touch something tender? ah!"
he jerks as your teeth clip his soft skin, indenting the shape of your teeth as a red bruise. his heartbeat thuds faster as your palms glide over the mounds of his chest, perfectly sculpted by his tight shirt and harness, and dance over his cock to stroke his sensitive inner thighs. they tense under your touch.
he's wearing a pair of tiny black jocks with a rainbow elastic that cups his ass. you stifle a laugh, trying not to break character.
"what?" he mumbles, blushing. "shut the fuck up. they're cute."
"oh, i agree." you give them a light smack and he moans sharply at the impact. "wonder what that guy would think if he saw you in these – if he saw how pretty you are, spreading your legs for me..." one hand strokes his taut stomach, passing below his hips to cup the cute bubble in his jocks. he whines softly as you squeeze. "be a good boy and keep quiet for me, yeah?"
he nods feebly, gnawing on his lower lip. you've barely done anything and yet he already feels ragged, his skin scorching and tight.
something hot and thick prods his asshole. he slaps a hand over his mouth as you snap your hips forward, burying yourself so deep in him that he sees stars, the burning stretch achingly good. "mmph—!"
you hush him softly, holding him steady as he trembles in your arms. the hot weight of your body pinning his into the rough, cold alley wall is almost mind-numbing. "that's my good boy... halfway there. my good boy takes cock so well, doesn't he?"
whining softly, he nods fiercely, gasping out a shaky moan as you press your hips tight against his ass. "mhm, mhm, i do – ah! you're just s-so big, 'm close, so close—"
"already?" your hips smack quick and rough against his ass, the lube making things wet and messy. he shoves his hand between his teeth and claws at the wall, the thick head of your cock grinding into his prostate and gliding against it with each thrust. "i just put it in, baby."
"s-sorry," he squeaks, his breathing haggard as his eyes dart between the ends of the alleyway. the headlights of a car rumble by and he clenches around you, eliciting a deep groan that rattles his spine and echoes in his head. "s-someone's gonna see – fuck, right there – h-hyung, they're gonna see—!"
"they will if you keep squealing your pretty head off," you grunt, gaze trained on the join between your bodies. his ass ripples, bouncing off of your hips with wet smacks, and arousal flames through your veins. you grab his wrists and pin them to the wall beside his head. "but you're so much tighter than usual – s'almost hard to fuck ya," you chuckle breathlessly. "you like this, don't you, my good boy? do you want someone to see the way you're crying on my cock?"
tears prick his eyes. you're right. his heart threatens to pound out of his ribs. he sniffles, moans high and airy. "n-no, i don't, 'm your good boy – please, sir, s-slow down—!"
his hips snap forward with a sharp cry as your cock slams into his guts. his vision whites out and his head spins, his body hot and sweaty even in the cool night, and he melts.
he arches his spine, throwing himself roughly back onto your cock and babbling for more. his hair bounces quickly, sticking to his temples, and his thighs shake violently as he comes into his jocks, sniffling and whimpering with hot tears streaking down his cheeks.
he's so messy. so embarrassed. he's acting like a slut. he squeezes his eyes shut and gulps back his loud moans, turning them into gasped whines and heavy pants as your dick scrapes his insides so wonderfully, filling him up like no one else ever could.
"sir – hyung," he babbles, melting into your hot kisses a little more with each harsh thrust, "hyung, hyung! please—!"
in the alleyway, the indent of the doorway you're hiding yourself in swings open. a familiar sleek face greets you, a cigarette between the lips.
it falls to the ground.
you yank jungkook's hips back onto your cock and he squeals, whimpering in shock and embarrassment as you fill him up right then and there. his huge, teary eyes stare back at you, his shaky hands pushing meekly at your stomach in an effort to get you to pull out, but you just step closer, forcing his body still as cum drips down his inner thigh from his jockstrap.
you tilt your head at the man who once, not too long ago, threw himself at jungkook, expecting to walk away in the morning with a satisfying ache between his legs. a tug on jungkook's long hair reveals the collar of dark, bruising hickeys littering his neck and shoulders.
jungkook moans your name, exhausted, and slumps against the wall, his hands trembling as he tries to steady himself against the cold bricks. you give one final thrust and jungkook keens, practically collapsing into your arms as his knees buckle.
you turn away from the stranger at last, dropping a chaste kiss to the nape of jungkook's neck. he shivers and whines softly, gripping your hips for dear life. you're the only thing keeping him from crumpling to the ground like a stringless marionette.
rapid footsteps. the door slams shut. you hush jungkook, nibbling another hickey into his flushed skin as you slide his pants over his ass.
"such a good boy," you whisper, wiping his tears away with the pad of your thumb. "my good boy, isn't that right?"
after a minute, he nods once, sucking in lungfuls of air as his head gradually clears of the thick fog. he leans back against you, tucking his warm face into the crook of your neck. your arms wrap securely around his waist. "yeah," he whispers vacantly, the tingle of pleasure still zinging through his nerves. "'m hyung's good boy... his..."
he's so cute like this, you think as you stroke his cheek and press a lingering kiss to his bitten lips. walking out of the alley, he grips your hand as if he'll die otherwise, but he decides that it's not close enough and hooks his arm over your shoulder, keeping yours around his bare waist. you help him keep steady on his shaking legs. his rosary of dark hickeys is a public announcement: he is yours, and you are his.
#top male reader#x male reader#male reader#dom male reader#bts x male reader#dom reader#top reader#bottom bts#bottom jungkook#jungkook x male reader#kpop x male reader#bts x reader#kpop x reader#bts smut#jungkook smut
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Oh my god I woke up this morning and my Stardew Valley meta post had almost 150 notes????? Hello?????????? Anyways I started writing this last night because @moon-is-pretty-tonight left nice tags on the original so thank you so much!!
We know from the starting scenes of the game that the farmer's grandfather loved Stardew Valley. So why did he leave? Pelican Town is a good place to grow old; George and Evelyn are just fine. It's a fine place to raise a kid, but maybe he just wanted to raise his child closer to real schools and other children.
Or maybe, just maybe, he understood.
Was there a day when he was in his thirties where he looked at his friends and realized they weren't like him? That he could run faster than them, work longer, explore deeper into the hidden places of the valley?
Was there a day when he went to the wizard to ask him for help, for knowledge if nothing else? Did he learn then that his family was different? Special? Chosen? And how did he react? He couldn't possibly raise a child in the valley if they would be as strange and fey as him. He had to leave. There was no other way.
But years later, on his deathbed, did he regret that choice?
Is that why he gave the farmer the letter?
Is that why they went back home?
When the farmer steps off the bus that first day, the valley is still on the cusp of winter, just barely tipping over into spring. The flowers are starting to bloom, but a chill still hangs in the air. As soon as the farmer's boots touch the soil there's a change. The air gets warmer. The trees get greener. Not by too much, not all at once, but it changes.
The junimos watch the farmer as they do their work. They're new to farming, but take to it with frightening speed; their first batch of crops is perfect. None of the townsfolk tell them that parsnips don't normally grow in less than a week, that cauliflowers don't grow to be ten feet tall, that fairies don't visit when the sun goes down and grow potatoes and beans and tulips overnight. The junimos talk amongst themselves in their strange, wild language, and agree: this is the one. They're back. The valley recognizes its own, even when they've left for a generation. The farmers have come home.
Things change fast in the valley. The community center, empty and decrepit for so many years, is rejuvenated. (Lewis says it was abandoned only a few weeks after the farmer's grandfather left. Strange coincidence, he says, that it both came and went with the farmer's family.) The mines and the quarry, similarly abandoned, are explored for the first time in ages. The town becomes cleaner, brighter, more vibrant, happier.
And it is happier. Not just the environment, but the people. It's the talk of the town for weeks when Haley does her first closet purge. Leah's art show in the town square is a huge success. Shane's smiling for the first time since he moved to the valley. All of them, when asked, say it's all thanks to the farmer.
People love to ask why Lewis didn't fix the community center on his own. Why Willy never repaired the boat to ginger island. Why Abigail or Marlon never went down to fix the elevator in the mines, or why Clint didn't fix the minecarts.
But isn't it so much more interesting to ask how those things were there in the first place? How they got so broken down? If the stories the townspeople tell are true, the valley was once a beautiful place, flourishing and full of life; why did that change? When did it change?
Was it when the farmer's grandfather, the locus of the valley, its chosen representative, left town?
And if so, what happens when the farmer comes back?
#lich says shit#stardew valley#stardew farmer#sdv#my writing#Hope y'all enjoyed!#I'm thinking about developing this into. Like. An actual Fan Fiction. Still sort of short-form but like with more detail?#LMK if you'd be interested to see that! Also if you want to be tagged in future installations of this please just let me know :)#I'm super into this version of the farmer as like. Blessed and cryptic child of the valley with all the strange behavior that entails#If i DO write a more in-depth version of this it'll be from the perspective of someone in town#maybe Leah? She seems like she'd be the one to notice the farmer being Odd. Either that or I'll do it from the perspective of multiple--#--different people to get their unique insights and stuff#I'd also want to dig into like#The family history of the farmer. And what that's like.#Because like why did grandpa leave?#He clearly loved the valley#So why didn't he stay?#Why did he give the deed to his grandchild and not his literal child?#And is it a coincidence that everything in the valley went downhill when he left?#I don't think so.
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STEEL MAN ᡣ𐭩 ─Colossus x r ˚。⋆୨୧˚─ 16.AUG.24
"𝓘 𝓽𝓸𝓵𝓭 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓽𝓸 𝓼𝓽𝓪𝔂 𝓹𝓾𝓽, 𝔀𝓱𝔂 𝓭𝓸 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓦𝓪𝓭𝓮 𝓱𝓪𝓿𝓮 𝓽𝓸 𝓫𝓮 𝓼𝓸 𝓻𝓲𝓼𝓴𝔂?" "𝓨𝓸𝓾 𝓴𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓵𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓶𝓮~" *ੈ𑁍༘⋆
𑄽ᧉྀི 𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬/𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 : Colossus X Reader, Violence, Death, Descriptive fight scenes, Sibling!Wade, Wilson!siblings, Swearing, Wade is a tag in himself.
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫 𝐬𝐚𝐲𝐬 : Inspired by a similar fanfiction, I can't remember the name nor the writer, but I know it had something to do with hide and seek, and I know it was ten thousand words long ! So thank you for inspiring me !
"Where, in the fuck! is! Everyone!?" I screamed over the gunfire, emphasising every word with a shot. "Wade, answer me!" I yelled into the earpiece, whilst hitting a man in the temple with the magazine of my gun, effectively knocking him out. "Calm down! Jesus, you sound like Louise Belcher! The sex-men should be here soon- I can- Ah, you fuck-knuckle! They should be here soon, I can hear their shitty ship!" He yells, clearly under pressure, the sound of people screaming next to him perfectly clear.
"Fuck-! Good!" I scream back, ducking behind a crate, shooting out over it, effectively and accurately shooting the snipers in the building ahead.
Me and Wade were closest to the mission point, enjoying a hotdog in a park, before we got whiff that a trafficking ring based in a tall parking lot was nearby, and led by four mutants, and thus inevitably were the first ones to arrive as Wade wanted his moment.
"Relax! Your man of steel balls and schlong will be here soon! And lord help you when it comes down to it!" I hear Wade giggle down the earpiece, hearing the familiar schh of his sword slicing. "I'm not even going to ask what that means." I groan, rolling out of my space and tackling another security guard.
"I mean, sister from another mister, you're gonna be in A-grade hell 'n heaven when you two-" Just as he was about to finish, someone coughed on the line, and it didn't take a genius to know who coughs that deep. "Wade, you know the rules. No inappropriate remarks during missions." Colossus' heavy accent remarked. "Where are you two anyway?"
"I'm by the west wing, personally scout master Kevin." Wade cheered, as he killed more people, very loudly. "I'm, fuck! I'm-" I tried to get out, but got distracted. There was too many guards nearby for me to talk, and fight. Focusing, I shut out the voice of Colossus, screaming at me to stay where i was, and Wade and Negasonic insulting eachother as I began to use my powers and abilities to the best of my actions.
Eventually, I realised everyone around me was dead, and I was on the second floor of the garage out of four. Touching my ear, sweating and out of breath, I came to realise, my earpiece is gone. I couldn't communicate, however there was blood all over me, whose I didn't know, but I knew some of it was mine, no doubt about that.
Feeling woozy, I looked around, and saw my earpiece far away, on the hood of a car, an almost heavenly light shining on it. "One way to gain a super cool monologue I guess.." I sigh, picking up the piece, but just as I picked it up, a voice racked through the oddly quiet lot.
"I wouldn't touch it~" Came a low giggle. "Shut your giggling, Deco. Hello, you can call me Ray." He smiled. The two men were in full costumes, clearly the mutants. "You, have worth. Powers, loyalty. I can feel it. I'm going to ask you one question, X-men agent, as I need not know your name currently, and you're going to answer honestly." The taller, calmer one started.
"Yeah, or else you all die!" Deco screamed. "Dear Jesus, you sound like Wade n me." I sighed, leaning on the side of the car, tilting my head at how he said we 'all' die.
"Continuing." Ray glared at Deco, as he clapped his hands twice, and the door to the staircase slammed open. Wade, clearly somehow unconscious, Colossus tied together via about thirty re-bars, and Negasonic wearing a sack on her head got thrown in forcefully into the room. Out of instinct, I raced toward the two mutants to see what the hell they did to my friends. "What the fuck did you do to-" I started, but was cut short when what felt like the sun was shot into my face.
Falling down, I tried to shield my eyes, but to no avail. "Don't even try." Ray spat. "It's sun rays, get it? Ray, ray? And if you try anything like that again I'll force you to watch each of them be tortured to death." He grinned, voice low. "Now, the choice. Join us, and they go free, or leave us, and we kill you all." He spoke, voice high. This guy definitely had a God complex.
"You never hugged your dad did you." I groaned, rubbing my eyes. Colossus was struggling to speak up for the team behind Deco, it was like he had a voice controlling collar on.
"What a- you don't talk to Ray like that-" Deco stormed, sauntering towards me. It didn't take a genius to know Colossus was going wild, struggling horrifically trying to save everyone, his soldier instincts kicking in like never before.
Grabbing me by the collar, Deco shoved me on the floor, I couldn't fight back, as it would only aggravate him more and I couldn't risk putting my friends and only brother in more danger.
"You wanna talk, huh? Talk to this." He hissed, before putting his hand on my leg, and in a flash, my leg was decomposing. I froze in confusion and shock, before a tear slid down. I physically couldn't process this.
After that, my head was whirring. Colossus broke out, allowing me to stand, as I tried to shoot Deco. However, I failed, and flung my gun at him instead, which also missed. Jogging over to negasonic and wade, I untied her and took the bag off of her, before kneeling over Wade.
"Wade wake up! cmon! ..tacos? ...pussy? That guy that just flew over us? C'mon, Wade wake up!" I gasped, holding his face. Negasonic and Colossus were absolutely destroying every bad guy that came their way.
"i told you to stay put, why do you and wade have to be so risky?" He strained, throwing someone over us out of the lot. "You know you love me." I scoffed, through tears, as I shook wade.
''Let me.'' He said through his accent, as he grabbed Wades chest, and swiftly went to throw him over the edge, but stopped just before, promptly waking him up.
''You big ol' ass cheek of metal I love you!" He squealed, as he got carried bridal style, acting like he was high. Rephrase, chances are, he is high. "Are you okay?" Colossus asked lowly, looking at me caring. "I am." I smile, touching his shoulder.
Tossing and turning is an under exaggerating. I felt like I was in spooky scary sweaty hell. After about an hour of deciding whether or not to pull an all nighter. Eventually, I ended up heading downstairs, walking past gloomy pictures of past estate owners, and achievements.
Getting downstairs, I expected the normal people I see down there, Kurt and scott. However, there was someone else there, big oily muscles and perfect hair, who is this guy, Mads Mikkealson? He has like, no flaws.
Oh wait, he does, he's eating Colossus' cereal.
"He's gonna kill you, dude. Big C I mean." I scoff, sitting across from him. "He'll ramble about how it's healthy and won't actually say anything, but he'll talk my ass off about it. He made the second rule of x-men to label your stuff for a reason." I giggled, looking at him.
"Really?" He raised his brow, leaning back smiling. That was when it hit me, that this was colossus. That's also when I hit him. Over, and over, before we migrated to a pillow fight.
"Wade? What're you doin-" I groaned, yawning. "Shhh easy e, lemme get number forty nine." He whispered, as he snapped another photo. That was when i realised, I was cuddling colossus, and that was also when it hit me, I had somehow learned his name, Piotr. "Wade I'm gonna fuckin-" I mumbled, about to lunge at him, before realising I couldn't. "Fuck you pete." I whispered, realising I was practically trapped to him like a three year olds teddy bear.
All the while, Wade kept getting pictures.
Such a good thing i had his baby photos to spread like an std.
THIS IS SO RUSHED BC I ALR MADE THIS AND WAS AB TO PUBLISH IT AND TUMBLR DELETED IT I WANTED TO CRY
#colossus x reader#colossus#piotr rasputin x reader#piotr rasputin#metalman#pisskink#LMAO#iloveyouuu#xmen#x-men#xmen x reader
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I've been going through the stuff my cousin left here (almost an entire bedroom's worth of stuff when she initially moved but we've managed to sell the crib and changing table and she gave a stroller and a playpen to friends) when she moved out a year ago; I'm posting a bunch of it online to sell and she says I can keep whatever I want from the pile. We are tremendously differently sized people but I don't think I'm going to need to buy a dress or a shirt or a cardigan for like ten years.
However I'm also going slightly insane. I think that I had intellectually understood that a huge part of fast fashion is people buying a ton of clothes that they don't wear more than a couple times but I didn't emotionally grok it until I filled five huge trash bags with all the stuff that wouldn't even be worth it to list but is still brand new (stuff like leggings and tee shirts that nobody is looking for on craigslist but that I would totally buy at a thrift store and that still has the original tags).
I haven't even started working on the toys left behind yet but I have no idea what to do with some of this stuff. It's just trash. Is there anything to do with stuff like happy meal toys and bouncy balls or should this all just go to the landfill? I feel horribly guilty for thinking about throwing away stuff that wasn't even mine. Does anyone have any advice about what to do with used crappy toys? (There are things like racetracks and those little toddler push cars and other stuff that we're either listing online or having a yard sale for, but I'm going nuts what do I do with a plastic knotts berry farm lunchbox full of coin machine toys?)
[i can't say anything about the clothes but in my cousin's defense about the toys she has asked all of the family to literally never give her children toys or clothes as gifts, only books, but their grandmother brings them over brand new toys every time she sees them, which is like four times a week so this isn't 100% my cousin's fault]
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Traitor
Pairing: Sihtric x reader (female)
Authors note: a big thank you to awesome and incredible @little-diable for having the wonderful and crazy idea to write this together. I loved it so much! You are such an amazing writer.
Warnings: SMUT 18+, angst
Summary: you thought you had been prepared for everything as you were sent to spy on Uhtred, until the moment you met a certain Danish warrior
Word Count: 4,8 K
Headers and dividers by the lovely @arcielee
If you want to be added to or removed from the tag list - write to me.
I'm not sure if this letter will ever get to you or if you'll even want to read it. But I couldn't leave without saying goodbye.
You probably already know, and it's true. I was sent to spy on Lord Uhtred, on orders from Lord Wihtgar, Uhtred’s cousin and the current ruler of Bebbanburg.
I came here as a spy and an enemy, full of suspicion, hate and disdain. I was sent to spy on a traitor of his own kin, on a heathen teamed up with the Danes to try and bring down my Lord, the rightful ruler of Bebbanburg.
But now, as I'm leaving, I want you to know I'm going as a friend and an ally, even if you can't quite believe it, even if you all rightfully see me as a traitor.
These past few months have taught me so much - about trust, relying on others, feeling accepted, and being valued. But most importantly, I've learned what it means to be loved.
I'm sorry. I know it's not enough, and it never will be…
"It's all blurred and smudged from here. I can't decipher it," Osferth looked up from the small piece of vellum he held in his hands. His gaze wandered around the dimly lit room before settling on the silhouette seated at the table, with elbows propped up and head resting on hands, fingers entwined in hair.
"Read it once more," Sihtric growled, his voice rough and slightly trembling.
"I've already read it to you five times. What do you expect to uncover?" Osferth shrugged. The sound of the bench falling echoed as Sihtric suddenly sprang to his feet, knocking it over and grabbed the cup from the table, draining it in a few hasty gulps. He stood there for a moment, examining it in his hand. Moments later, the cup was hurled to the ground with such force that it shattered into countless small pieces, causing Osferth to flinch.
"Nothing," venom dripped from Sihtric's voice, "I'm a fool, a damned idiot. How could I not see it? How could I be so blind?" he roared before storming out of the room.
It had been surprisingly easy, much easier than you had anticipated. It appeared that Uhtred had a soft spot for taking in masterless dogs and those less fortunate. All it took was a heart-wrenching tale of being captured by Scots as a child and raised as a warrior to win his acceptance. You couldn't help but feel a sense of disdain for his kind-heartedness and naivety. He truly didn't deserve to be called a Lord.
A Lord should be stern and ruthless, someone who instilled fear in their subordinates, devoid of the lower emotions like love and compassion that made people vulnerable to manipulation. This was what you had been taught, ingrained in you since childhood, nurtured by your mother's milk, and enforced by your father's strict hand.
You happened to be the sole child of Bebbanburg's commandant and the trusted right hand of Lord Ælfric Uhtredson. Your father had always yearned for a son, but fate had dealt him a different hand – a daughter, a fragile and small creature with large, inquisitive eyes and infectious laughter.
The carefree and joyful days of your childhood came to an abrupt end when your father finally acknowledged your existence. Around the age of ten, as it became apparent that your mother would not provide the male heir he so desperately desired, your father’s attention shifted to you.
And now, here you were – a grown woman, a trained warrior, and a cunning spy, with deep and sorrowful eyes, and a laughter that had been absent from your life for years. This was how you entered the service of Lord Uhtred.
“You’ve got a knack for it,” Finan chuckled approvingly, and you saw his hand extending towards you to help you up from the ground. You hesitated, uncertain if he genuinely meant it, half-expecting him to withdraw his hand at the last moment, his warm smile giving way to a mocking grin. He had bested you fair and square. Again. Finan the Agile, they called him, and rightly so.
He had the appearance of a large, affable bear, with warm brown eyes, that always seemed to twinkle mischievously. What a deception! That man moved as swiftly as lightning. Despite investing all your strength, skill, and effort, you found yourself seated in the dirt, gasping for breath. The surprise in your eyes was impossible to conceal as you kept glancing at his outstretched hand. Even though you knew by now that his hand would remain there, that you could rely on it and you could trust it not to turn against you, old habits died hard, etched into your very bones, causing you to hesitate once more.
Finally, you mustered the courage to grasp it, allowing Finan to help you to your feet. "That move earlier, when you suddenly changed direction and lunged to my left, almost caught me off guard. That was impressive," the bearded Irishman continued, his genuine smile unwavering. He retrieved your sword and handed it back to you. "Ready for another round?"
You thought you were prepared for anything. You were ready to fight for your place among the warriors, anticipating challenges and the disdain that comes with being an outsider, a newcomer, and a woman. You were prepared for the sly glances, whistles, and crude remarks, for unwelcome advances and dirty hands trying to grope you. Having been raised in the world of men, you knew their ways well.
"Hey, let the lady catch her breath," Osferth's ever-cheerful voice echoed across the yard as he approached with a pitcher and ale mugs in his hands. The shy former monk was undoubtedly the most peculiar addition to the pack around Uhtred. Why was he even carrying a sword? He seemed clueless about how to use it. Initially, you assumed he might be warming someone's bed, but it soon became evident that this was not the case.
There was no logical explanation for his presence in a warriors' camp, but there he was, offering a bashful smile as he filled the mugs with ale and handed the first one to you. You couldn't deny the calming and radiant aura that accompanied him, something intangible, something elusive that defied explanation. Always courteous and attentive, unwavering in his faith in God's benevolence, he carried the weight of being born out of wedlock with quiet dignity and bestowed genuine kindness upon those around him.
You had believed you were prepared for anything – ready to endure contempt and hatred, to withstand pain and humiliation, to employ your body as both a weapon and allure. You had experienced it all, endured it all, and each time emerged stronger. But there was one thing you hadn't been prepared for – to be accepted just as you were, to be treated with respect and appreciation. Friendship and loyalty had taken you by surprise, and above all, you had never anticipated being cared for and loved.
Love. It had been an empty word, devoid of real meaning to you. In this cursed world where power, authority, and control were the sole currencies of worth, there was no room for something as seemingly foolish as love. How could you have prepared for it when you had never felt it?
Love didn't strike you suddenly, nor did it assault your senses and reason. You might have recognized it then if it had. Instead, it arrived slowly, subtly, through tentative glances and concealed smiles, in the hesitant brush of fingers. It infiltrated your everyday life as helping hands to maintain your weapons or carry your saddlebag, as a casual shift to the side, making room for you at the fire, as unassuming inquiries when you appeared tired or unwell. The genuine care and attention that the reserved and initially withdrawn young Dane with that stern and piercing gaze framed by two mismatched eyes offered so effortlessly and unpretentiously wrapped around you like a soft, welcoming blanket. It dulled your wariness, dazzled you like freshly brewed ale, and you fell for it without regret.
“Fuck,” you moaned, eyes squeezed shut, hands pressed against the cold ground. You were lying flat on your back, unable to take another step. It had been a foolish mistake, really, one second you had tried to prove to the guys how easy it was to balance one too many cups of ale in your hands, the next you had found yourself on the ground. One of the other drunken guys had rammed into you, forcing you to the ground without another warning.
It had taken you a few seconds to realise what was going on, blinking the tears away that welled up in your eyes due to the pain sticking to your foot. Voices had echoed in your ears, growing louder by the second, forcing you to at least try and sit up. All you could do was watch how Finan had to hold back Sihtric, who was about to tear the guy to shreds.
You had murmured Sihtric’s name, hoping to catch his attention. If there was one thing you hated, it was being the centre of attention – and being the reason for a fight amongst the guys would definitely put you further into the said centre. It had taken Finan a few moments to get some distance between Sihtric and the guy, forcing the Dane to finally focus on you.
“Can you stand?” Sihtric had kneeled in front of you, worried eyes flickering between yours and the hurt ankle you pressed your hand against. A whimper had left you as you had to rise, plopping back to the ground with a huff. There was no use in denying the shame thumping through your veins, filling every inch of your body. Only as Sihtric had placed his hand on your chin, redirecting your gaze towards him, had you managed to look at the handsome Dane again, sending him a smile.
“Up you go.” Without another warning, Sihtric had picked you up, strong arms wrapped around your cold body. The shriek that had clawed through you had left Finan and Osferth laughing, watching Sihtric carry you towards the tent he was supposed to sleep in.
And now here you were, placed on the warm fur, eyes studying the Dane’s every move. You could tell that something was holding Sihtric back, not daring to touch you for more than a handful of moments, pulling away whenever his eyes found yours as if your mere closeness set fire through his body. It frustrated you, seeing him this weary, scared to touch your already battered body.
“Sihtric,” you murmured his name, once again sitting up to be closer to him. Your hand darted out to find his warm cheek, trying not to pay the way he seemed to hold his breath too much of your attention. Slowly your thumb began to move, stroking his soft skin, the small marks and scars littering his cheeks, marks you couldn’t help but admire. He emanated strength and danger, and yet you felt awfully safe around him, knowing that he’d always protect you – should you need it.
With your breath hitched in your chest, it took you a moment to realise what was happening. Sihtric had pressed his lips against yours, hand placed on the back of your head to keep you close, not daring to let you go. Your heart was racing, torn between excitement and confusion, since you had hoped you’d eventually find yourself in a situation like this, and yet you haven’t dared to overthink it much.
“I am sorry.” Suddenly he pulled away, trying to get some distance between the two as if you were some addicting poison he needed to stay away from. Your wide pupils followed his every haste movement, not understanding what was going on. “You’re hurt, I shouldn’t touch you, not like this.”
A soft laugh broke out of you, hand reaching out for him to pull Sihtric in for another kiss. The moan that clawed through him left you grinning against his mouth, slowly parting your lips to deepen the kiss. You found yourself pressed against the fur, with Sihtric hovering over you. Neither of you dared to break the kiss this time, not as his hands began to work on your clothes, not as you fought against the need to arch your back to let go of a deep moan.
“I want to take care of you, take away your pain. Will you let me?” His raspy voice shot shudders down your spine, eyes rolling back into your head the second his warm mouth found your chest. All you could do was moan his name, teeth running along your lower lip to somewhat try to be quiet, not wanting to attract the attention of nearby drunkards. Expectedly he sucked on your hardening nubs, grinning whenever you choked on his name. “My pretty shieldmaiden, the fiercest warrior I aim to claim.”
“Gods, Sihtric, more. Please.” Sihtric blindly followed your choked command, kissing his way down to your heat. You were dripping for him, needing to feel his hands and mouth on you before he could fuck you like you had dreamt of him doing for a while now. The way he groaned at your taste left you clenching around nothing, fingers holding onto the furs to try and ground yourself.
His colourful eyes watched you intently, not wanting to miss one single expression, telling him all about how you felt buried beneath him, with his mouth on you. You felt as if you were drowning, clinging to every breath you were allowed to inhale, close to passing out. But Sihtric was determined, wanting to push the most sinful yet most beautiful sensation through your body.
“I must have pleased the Gods for being allowed to feel you this close, you’re mine now.” A hum left you, unable to reply with words as he forced two fingers into your tightness. Your walls clenched around him, telling him that you were already close. The grin he wore on his lips was devilish as he spoke up once again, “Say it, say that you’re mine.”
“I’m yours, fuck, only yours.” Your eyes rolled back into your head as you came on his fingers, whimpering his name. Sihtric’s thumb kept circling your pulsing bundle, prolonging the intense sensations for a few more moments. For a second it felt as if you were reborn, heart racing too fast, palms sweaty from the way you had tried to hold onto the furs.
You tried to rise from your position, wondering what he’d do next, but Sihtric kept you pressed to the ground, looking like Loki himself, the trickster with a grin that could fool anybody. With wide eyes, you watched Sihtric undress, leathers plopping to the ground to expose his carefully chiselled muscles, gracing his stomach, his arms, and his thighs. All you could do was choke on your breath as your eyes focused on his hard cock, begging for your touch, to feel you wrapped around him.
“I promised to take care of you, but I won’t be gentle, not when I’ve got you buried beneath me like that.” Sihtric’s voice dripped with possessiveness, lust, and excitement, once again leaving you covered in goosebumps. You nodded, unable to speak up as his mouth found yours, kissing you breathless while he aligned himself with your cunt. “Hold onto me, mark me up.”
You didn’t need to be told twice, clawing your fingernails into his warm skin, adding more scars to the ones he had collected on battlefields. And yet he’d be prouder of the ones you added than any other, he’d fight any war if it meant getting to be with you. The both of you moaned in unison as he pushed into you, forcing your walls to adjust to his size.
Sihtric hadn’t lied, he wasn’t soft, wasn’t sweet, no, he fucked you like a man on a mission, a man who followed his lord’s commands. And you loved every moment of it, every rough thrust that managed to set your body ablaze, every thrust that left you choking on the air you were desperate for. Your nails left bloody marks down his shoulders, holding onto him as he fucked you on the fur, hoping that this was the first of many nights you’d spent on this fur together.
“You feel so good around me like the gods have crafted you for me, mine to own, mine to love.” Sihtric’s words almost drew tears to your eyes, desperately wanting to reply, to tell him about your feelings, but you couldn’t. You were too far gone, once again close to falling off the edge. With one last kiss pressed to your lips, you came, moaning his name into the cold night. Sihtric fucked you through your release, groaning into the crook of your neck as he came only a few seconds later.
You both panted heavily, slowly coming down from your highs, as your foggy mind gradually cleared, and your hazy gaze locked onto Sihtric's mismatched eyes.
This was the moment you always hated the most - the moment of harsh and uncomfortable truth, filled with awkward glances, whispered words, and hurried, clumsy movements. It was the time when one inevitably left, fumbling for clothes and murmuring promises that were never meant to be kept.
You had been on both sides often enough; it was neither new nor unexpected to you. However, for perhaps the first time in your life, you felt an inexplicable emotion creeping beneath your skin. It drove you to dig your fingers into the plush, sweat-soaked furs beneath you, restraining the impulse to pathetically wrap your arms around Sihtric's shoulders in a desperate attempt to keep him from leaving.
Sihtric crushed down beside you, his breath ragged, and his strong arms instinctively encircled you, pulling your back flush against his chest as though he feared you might disappear.
"Will you stay with me?" a hoarse whisper brushed against your ear, igniting a new sense of life within you.
"I couldn't leave even if I wanted to," you chuckled softly.
"Do you want to?"
"No, I don't," you whispered, turning to face him.
"Good, because I don't want you to either," Sihtric murmured, pressing his lips against yours.
I'm sorry I never found the courage to say these words to you. I always thought there would be enough time for that.
I just hope you felt it, I hope you sensed it, how much I loved you. And I still do. I want you to know that will never change. I will always love you, until my very last breath.
Tears welled up in your eyes, falling onto the vellum before you.
Muffled noises from outside caught your attention, and you hastily rolled it up, inadvertently smudging the ink where your tears had fallen. Time was running out; you had to leave. There had always been rumours of Uhtred having his own spies in Bebbanburg, though no one had ever managed to prove them. Today, you had seen him - the blacksmith from Bebbanburg, here in Rumcofa, in Uhtred’s hall. You had tried to hide, but it had been too late. He had seen you, his eyes glued to your pale face, as your heart frantically drummed against your ribs. He had recognized you, just as you had recognized him, and in that moment when your eyes met, you knew your mission had reached its end.
It was too late to confess your true purpose for coming here. You had wanted to reveal your real identity so many times, but the right moment had never seemed to come. And now, it was too late. Your past life had caught up with you, its cold, bony fingers slowly closing around your throat. You didn’t want to leave, but you couldn't stay.
Silence, absolute silence enveloped you, devoid of any sound—no voices, no footsteps, no creaking doors. There was nothing to attract your attention, it was as if the world itself had stilled, allowing your thoughts to flutter through your mind like startled birds, beating against the cage of your consciousness. You had never imagined that silence could be so agonisingly painful, so suffocating.
He will not come! He hates and detests you! You deserve it! The cruel voice echoed in your head, driving you to cover your ears with your hands. Growls of frustration escaped your lips, reverberating against the thick walls of Bebbanburg's dungeon, as you attempted to silence the relentless taunting.
Bebbanburg had fallen, or rather, it had been reclaimed by its rightful owner. You had always known this moment would come, understood that Uhtred would never relinquish his birthright, his lands, or the fortress of his ancestors. You had simultaneously dreaded and longed for this day, aware that it would spell both your doom and your salvation. And now, it was a reality.
God as your witness, you had tried to forget him. You had attempted to banish him from your thoughts, to expel the longing from your mind. For a time, you had even believed you had succeeded, drowning your yearning and hunger for Sihtric's touch, for his commanding yet gentle voice whose orders you had been so eager to obey, for the stern yet loving gaze of his mismatched eyes that seemed to follow you wherever you went.
But the moment you laid eyes on him and Finan on the upper walkway, flanked by guards, you knew it had all been an illusion. You knew you had failed utterly. Your hand shot up instinctively, covering your mouth to stifle the scream threatening to erupt from your chest.
As if in a haze, you recalled following the guards, sneaking into the dungeon—this very dungeon whose walls you had been pounding in anger and despair for the past few hours, leaving your knuckles raw and bleeding. Then, like a bolt of lightning carrying God's wrath, like a spear hurled by an enemy's hand, it struck you. The coldness in Sihtric's gaze as he lifted his eyes from the lifeless bodies of the guards on the floor to meet yours froze the words forming on your lips, causing them to hang in the air before shattering into a thousand pieces upon the ground.
"You?" was the sole word that escaped Finan's lips as you swiftly cut through the ropes binding their hands, yet even that was laden with disdain and revulsion. You had shown them the way out, the concealed passage to the main hall, and they had left—no words exchanged, no glances shared, no turning back—just silence, relentless silence. The same oppressive silence lingered as Ælfwynn and Hild departed the fortress through the small, secret door you had revealed to them. Traitor, her eyes had silently screamed at you.
You could have fled, escaped, started anew far from this cursed fortress, far from everyone who governed your life. You could have been free. Yet, as tempting as it was, you knew there was no escaping yourself, no escaping the searing shame and longing that had gnawed at you from within all this time. You couldn't leave, not again.
It was Sihtric's hands that seized you, wrenching you to your feet and twisting your arms behind your back when they found you seated in the main hall, awaiting their arrival. You offered no resistance; the touch of him, even as his eyes blazed with hatred, sent shivers down your spine, and you allowed yourself to be dragged to the dungeon in silence. What could you say? How could you explain the inexplicable?
Leaning back against the cold and unforgiving stone wall, you felt the rugged surface digging into your skin even through your clothes as you slowly sank to the ground. Here you were, locked up in the dark and soundless cells beneath Bebbanburg, waiting for something you knew would never come. Closing your eyes, you let the silence envelop you, to become a part of you, to seep into your soul. You were alone, yet strangely, you felt free. No more lies, no more disguise. Just you.
A creaking sound reached your ears, and you slowly, almost unwillingly, opened your eyes to meet whoever had decided to disturb your silence.
“I should have known.” You’d always recognise his voice, wrapping itself around you like the warm summer breeze. But now it wasn’t warm, no, it was set on freezing you, leaving marks that would forever remind you of your betrayal. Your eyes watched his every move, wondering, perhaps even fearing, that he’d step even closer.
God, how could you have betrayed the man who owned your heart? Why did you keep quiet, when he was right there to hold you, to take away your pain?
“A traitor, good for nothing. I should be ashamed that I touched you.” At first, his words hurt you, cutting deeper than the swords he had held before ever could. But the more you pondered on them, the more you found yourself focusing on the “should” that had rolled off his tongue.
“Should?” It was just a whisper leaving you, and yet it was enough to draw a sigh from Sihtric. He unlocked the cell and stepped into the small space you were forced to call your own.
“As much as I want to hate you for betraying my lord, for betraying my family, for betraying me I can’t. The Gods know how much I tried to.” Sihtric crouched down in front of you, his differently coloured eyes wandering over your features, unable to bite down the smile that tugged on his lips as you leaned closer. Carefully he cupped your cold cheek, pondering on his next move.
“I am sorry, so very sorry.” All he did was hum, dipping his head down to kiss you. You knew that he wouldn’t forgive you easily, but yet you hoped that he’d learn to, no matter what it took, you’d do it if it meant regaining his trust. Within seconds you were pulled to your feet, front pressed against the cold stones, away from him.
The whine rumbling through you left Sihtric chuckling, a sound so familiar and yet it dripped with something you weren’t used to, something dark, something that left your body covered in goosebumps. You wanted to look at him, it had been too many hours since you had last gotten the chance to, but Sihtric didn’t loosen his grip, not even as he freed you from the fabrics and leathers covering your body.
“You’ll take my cock and you’ll thank me for it. It’s the least you can do.” The sob that left you was almost pathetic, torn between the arousal thumping through your veins and the fear holding you hostage. Would he ever forgive you? Would he ever ask you to tell your side of the story? Thoughts that were lost the second he pushed into you from behind.
It had been too long since Sihtric had last touched you, and yet your body clung to him, begging him to keep on going, to fuck you like you were his. God, how much you wanted to be his, the one to care for, the one who’d hold you close whenever you needed him to. The way he moaned into your ear, hand placed over your mouth to keep you quiet, made you shudder in need.
“Fuck, they could hang me for humping a traitor, but you feel too good, you always have.” His pleasure-drunken words made you clench around him, eyes squeezed shut to keep your tears from rolling down your cheeks. This was your fault, your wrongdoing, and now you were paying the price, taking the cock of the man you loved, while he called you a traitor.
You whimpered his name, unable to keep on speaking as his cock nudged against the swollen spot, making you see stars. With your hands pressed against the cold stones, you tried to ground yourself, hoping that you wouldn’t pass out from the intense sensations, especially when he had you on your two feet.
The sounds of your bodies meeting grew louder as Sihtric felt your orgasm nearing, already done for, set on pushing you over the edge. Tears now dripped from your eyes, guided by the intense pleasure only Sihtric made you feel. Another choked gasp left you as you came on his cock, begging him to follow.
Sihtric came moments later, imprinting himself on your walls with a groan. The both of you were heavily panting, but while you had your eyes squeezed shut, Sihtric already pulled out of you, wordlessly redressing himself. Slowly you turned towards him, eyebrows furrowed, eyes glassy.
You wanted to beg him for forgiveness, once again desperate to regain his trust, but he kept on studying you, wordlessly. And without another word leaving him, he turned from you, leaving you behind, with the cell unlocked. He was giving you a way out, a test, nothing more than a test.
Taglist: @sihtricfedaraaahvicius @hb8301 @zillahvathek @alexagirlie @gemini-mama @verenahx @mysteriouslydeafeningwerewolf @willowbrookesblog @thenameswinter99 @ellabellabus07 @mcbuckyyyy @kirtseinw
#sihtric#sihtric x reader#the last kingdom#tlk#sihtric kjartansson#sihtric x you#sihtric fic#the last kingdom fic#tlk fanfic#sihtric smut
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"𝑰𝒍𝒍𝒖𝒔𝒊𝒐𝒏" - Osferth x Reader (Modern AU)
A/N: This takes place in the modern world! // divider @kithsune
Summary: You work at the local grocery store and often see Osferth who you've slowly developed a crush on. One night you see him in the place you never wanted him to.
Tw: None! (this time...😏😈)
Word Count: 3.2k
• Final Chapter →
For as long as you could remember you wanted more. More than the life you had, more money in your pocket, just...more. You weren't as lucky as most girls and didn't have even a quarter of the life they lived. You hated this town, it was as if it was still stuck in the past never advancing forward with the rest of the world.
Your dad died from a heart attack. Unknown to you and your family he had hidden money troubles. Ones that came knocking at your door once he died and demanded that you pay what he owed.
Your mother was already stretching herself thin with 3 jobs. Your siblings did odd jobs where they could while in school. At first, you did too but then your mother asked you to drop out and take on more. You were in your last semester of high school. You tried to argue but in the end, felt guilty so you did as she asked and left school.
Your town was a decent drive out from the city so there weren't many jobs to get around here. You were lucky when your friend's dad who owns the supermarket offered you a job. It was pretty easy you spent most of your time cashing people out and occasionally stocking the shelves.
Within your first week of working, you noticed a regular customer. You recognized him, he had graduated a 2 years before you but ended up staying in town and working in his uncle's auto repair store.
"Ello'?" You blinked quickly and looked in front of you. There he stood a basket in hand looking at you confused.
"So sorry. I was lost in thought." You take the basket and begin scanning his items. Feeling your cheeks flush from embarrassment.
"Ts alright. I do it all the time." He has a nervous smile on his face. That was something you noticed too. He was always so nervous and sweaty.
"How's your uncle doing?" You try to make small conversation while bagging his items.
"You mean how's your car doing?" He smirks at you. "My uncle's doing well. Your car is too, should be done tomorrow." A neighbor of yours had offered to give you their old car and since they owed your dad a favour before he passed he agreed to fix it up for you.
"Well, im glad they're both doing good." You place the bagged items on the counter. "Ten fifty." He hands you the money and you put it in the register. "Well...have a good day..." You glance at the name tag on his jumper. "Osferth." He immediately blushes.
"And you too..." You offer your name and he smiles. "That's a beautiful name...come round tomorrow for your car." He waves goodbye and pushes on the door that doesn't open before pushing open the right one and quickly walking out of the store.
The next day after your shift you walked over to the mechanic shop and awkwardly stood at the garage entrance looking around.
You spot Osferth walking back into the garage carrying something.
God, he looks so good...
He has the typical mechanic jumper but has it tied around his waist leaving his body on full display. What you can only assume is a mix oil and sweat stains on his white undershirt as well as his fingers and arms.
You walk over to where he is as he places the box in front of another mechanic who catches a glimpse of you and gives Osferth a look as you get closer. He turns around and smiles as he sees you. Osferth wipes his hands with a rag.
"Hey." He stops in front of you and all you can smell is a faint scent of his cologne and oil.
"Hi." You can feel your face heating up slightly and you fight the smile that wants to shine on your face.
"Your car's over here." He leads you over to the other side of the shop. The car looked way better than it did before. The paint job made it look almost brand new. "Wanna do a test drive?"
You look over at him and nod excitedly. He opens the door for you and hands you the keys before going around to the passenger side. He fixes his jumper so he's wearing it properly and doesn't dirty your car before getting in.
The test drive is quiet and a bit awkward but you can't help but smile the entire time. Although your mom will probably put more pressure and tasks on you since you'll be able to drive, this car still gives you freedom.
You pull back into the parking lot of the shop and Osferth gets out so he can get you the paperwork. When you sign them you can feel him staring at you and even see him open his mouth a few times as if he is going to say something but nothing comes out.
"Everything all good?" He takes a deep breath and just stares at you blinking slowly. "Osferth?"
"Yeah! Um... you're good to go...bye." He turns and walks back into the shop looking back a couple times while muttering to himself.
"Ok then..."
You stopped to get groceries on the way home and even drove by the park. The feeling of finally not having to take the bus anymore was overwhelming. For so long it felt as though nothing in your life was getting better, but for some reason this car made you feel as though a change was coming, and life could get better.
You carry the groceries inside the house and close the door with your foot.
'Leo? Noah?" You stand and wait by the door to hear any response. "LEO! NOAH!" You then hear the sounds of footsteps coming downstairs.
"Geez you don't have to yell." Noah walks over and grabs one of the bags.
"Yeah yeah. Pack these away I have to get ready for work." You hand the other bags to Leo and take off your shoes. "Is mom home?"
"Nope. She picked up another shift." You hear a bag open and peek around to see Noah already eating a bag of chips.
"Hey no! Those are for school." You walk over and grab the chips. "If you're hungry mom made spaghetti while you guys were at school." You put the chips away and head upstairs to your room. The only good thing about all of this was you had your own space since you were older while they had to share.
You take out your phone and scroll on social media for a while. You see videos and photos of girls from your school planning for prom and university. It saddens you a bit, to see your once friends now moving on with their life while you would be stuck here.
You wipe an escaped tear and fling your phone on your bed. As you stare at the ceiling there's a knock on the door.
"Come in." You sit up and see Noah walk in holding the bag of chips. "What is it?"
He closes the door behind him.
"When are you going to tell mom?" He gives you a look and you already know what he's talking about.
"Im not going to Noah." You stand up take the chips from him and sit back down on your bed eating a few.
"You can't keep doing this? Can't you get a normal second job?" He wipes his powdery fingers on one of the tapestries on your walls thinking you didn't notice.
"Listen. You swore you wouldn't bring this up." Noah walks over and sits next to you on the bed.
"I know...but it's not fair. You shouldn't have to do this for money?" You wrap your arm around his shoulders and bring him in. "Maybe Leo and I can get a job? That way you can quit." You chuckle.
"You two? A job? You can barely remember to clean your room." You give him a kiss on his temple. "It's fine Noah. By the end of summer, we can pay off Dad's loans. Then I'll quit. I promise."
Noah wraps his arms around you hugging you tightly.
"You guys are gross." You look up to see Leo by the door eating from a different bag of chips.
Fucking vultures I swear
"What did I say about the chips?!" You grab a pillow and fling it at him.
Leo picks up the pillow and tries to throw it at you but you use Noah as a shield. Noah grabs the pillow and hits you with it and Leo joins in both of them hitting you with pillows laughing.
Interrupting the moment your phone alarm goes off.
"Ok! Ok! You guys win! You can eat the chips!" They both stop and begin laughing at you. "Yeah yeah laugh it up."
You grab your phone and turn off the alarm.
"Ok, I have to get ready for work. Go do your homework." Noah and Leo get up and walk over to the door. Leo is going on about something from class thinking Noah is listening.
When you look up you see Noah looking at you with a sad expression. You give him a half smile knowing he's only worried.
"It's fine. Go." He closes the door behind him leaving you all alone in your room.
You walk over to your closet and pull out the suitcase in the corner.
"Alright...what heels should we wear today?"
(2 weeks later)
This is Stupid. This is Stupid. This is Stupid.
Osferth is pacing outside the grocery store unable to stand still as his brain tries to talk him out of doing this.
He's holding a gift bag, occasionally glancing back inside the bag and towards the store.
Just go in and hand it to her. Simple!
He looks through the window again and can see her smiling at a customer while cashing out their stuff.
Idiot! You should have asked her out when you gave her the car.
A couple looks at him like he's crazy as they walk inside the grocery store and glance back at the boy who hasn't stopped walking in circles.
"Osferth?" He stops and looks at the door. He sees you standing there looking at him. "You ok? My manager said there was a crazy person outside and I'm hoping she wasn't talking about you." You have a smile on your face that goes straight to his pants.
"I got this for you." He blurts out and holds the gift bag in your direction.
You walk over and take the gift bag. He watches as you smile at the different gifts inside. He wasn't sure what to get you but ultimately decided that you'd like some stuff for your new car.
So he got you a new keychain, some car fresheners, a steering wheel cover in your favourite colour and a fuzzy heart to hang on your mirror.
"Osferth..this is so sweet. Thank you." You walk over and give him a hug that he wasn't expecting. It feels good to him to have his arms wrapped around you. He's sad when you try to break the hug.
Now is your chance!
He lets you lean back but keeps his arms around your waist.
"I was wondering..." He watches your face as he searches for the words. "It's my birthday this Saturday my friends are hosting a party. I was wondering if you'd come." He speaks quickly, and you almost struggle to understand what he's saying. "That's only if you'd like to come! I mean you don't have to! But if you did I would-"
"Osferth." You cover his mouth. "I'd love to go to your bir-."
"I don't want you to come as a friend though!" He shocks himself with how he cut you off. "I like you. Like...really like you. I have for a while. I wanted to ask you out a while ago but...I was too scared."
You listen to him while fighting a smile off your face.
"So I'd like you to come but...as my date..." He waits and watches for a response. His eyes widen as you lean up towards him and kiss him on his cheek.
"Yes. I'd love to be your date." Osferth picked you up and spun you excitedly while kissing your cheek.
The moment was ruined by your manager coming out to tell you to get back to work. You said a quick goodbye and went inside and back to your register. As you look out the window you see Osferth celebrating before leaving.
Osferth POV - (Friday Night 12am)
I finish getting dressed before heading downstairs.
"Finally, took ya long enough." Finan heavily pats me on the back while Sihtric and Uhtred walk over. "You ready kid?"
"Are you going to tell me where we're going?" They all look at each other with a mischievous smile.
"Absolutely not." Uhtred grabs his jacket before opening the door. "That would ruin the surprise. Come on."
The four of us head out to the car. They blindfold me before we get in.
"Don't worry you're gonna have fun. If not...we will." Sihtric pinches my cheek and I blindly swat his hand away.
A couple minutes later the car is stopped and they unbuckle me.
"Im gonna fall!" Uhtred and Sihtric hold my arms while leading me. I can hear music and instantly assume it's a club. "Are we at a club?"
"Something like that," Finan says. "Alright. Unblind him, boys."
The blind comes off and I blink a couple times to clear my vision. I look up at the building and see the neon sign.
"Viva?" I read the sign.
Where have I heard that before?
My eyes widen as I realize where we are and I turn to run but im quickly grabbed by Uhtred.
"Don't be boring kid! It's only a strip club!" Finan helps to drag me towards the door.
"NO! Im not going in there!"
When you mix someone like me, who has only had sex twice in their life, with a room full of quarter-dressed ladies. You tend to have a reaction that people will notice considering it will look like there is something in your pants.
"This is a bad idea!" They all laugh as they finally push me through the doors.
"I think it's a great one." Sihtric wraps his arm around me. "Oh come on kid. It won't be that bad. If you don't like it after an hour you can go sit in the car."
"Don't you mean we will leave if I don't like it?" They all look at each other.
"No, I was correct the first time." They all show their ID before walking in fully.
Osferth eyes widen as he gets a view of the stage. A red-haired girl is up there dancing and he can't help but stare and for some reason, he feels wrong for doing so. He quickly looks to the floor.
"You're meant to look, kid! Don't be such a prude!" Uhtred smacks the back of my head.
We take a seat at a table. Girls come by and take orders for drinks.
"Im not being a prude, I just..." I stop and stare at the girl walking on stage for a moment. My eyes are fixated on her as I blink a couple times.
"What is it, kid?" They all look where I am. "Oh. You like that one?"
It's her...
I watch as she dances. I hide my face but not my view. Every now and then im not sure if it really is here but then I see that smile. I look around and see all the men looking at her and my heart breaks.
When her set finishes I turn back to the boys and stare into my drink for a while. They don't say anything but I can feel their gazes on me.
"I'll be right back." I walk over to the bar. "Excuse me?" The girl walks over and smiles. "Who was the girl that just performed?"
"She goes by Candy."
"Is there a way I could talk to her?" The girl smiles already being able to tell that I've probably never been at a strip club before. She reaches for a clipboard and looks at it.
"Actually she'll be leaving now. That was her last set. Sorry. But she works again next week on Thursday." I nod my head and walk back over to the table.
"What is it?" Finan leans over.
"I knew her. That girl..."
"Oh..." he takes a sip from his drink. "You should go talk to her."
"I can't. She's finished her shift. Probably getting ready to leave right now." I reach for the shot they poured me earlier and down it despite the burn.
"Look. Don't ask how I know this but..." Finan leans in closer. "Around the back, red door. Thats where they leave." I look over at him and he nods.
I quickly get up and head out the door not caring to get a stamp from the bouncer.
"Your set was so good!" one of the girls came by and gave me a kiss on the cheek. "I told you you'd become more confident quickly."
"I was so nerouvs to try that trick you taught me." She smiles before walking away.
You count the cash you made today before wrapping a rubber band around it and putting it in your purse.
$823...not bad for a Friday.
You zip up your jacket and finish cleaning up your station before heading for the door.
"Bye girls!" the girls in the room yell bye back before you walk out. You step outside and begin walking towards your car.
"Wait." You stop in your tracks once you hear his voice. Your breathing quickens as panic is evident on your face. "Turn around."
You slowly turn around and see him leaning against the wall.
"O-..Osferth? Wh...what are you doing here?" He walks over to you.
"Why do you work here?" His tone is harsh.
"I don't see why thats any of your business." You're immediately defensive. How can you not be?
You didn't want to work here either. But this was a fast way to make back the money your father owed. You remember when Noah found out. He had gone into your room without permission and found a card sitting on your desk for the club. Curious, he went online and searched up the name and found out through Google what it was and what the job meant.
You remember how upset he was when he asked you. Although he doesn't fully understand what it is you do he knew enough that it wasn't something he wanted you doing.
"Why do you work here?" He repeats his question.
"It's not by choice. It's by need. I need the money." You begin walking over to your car feeling mortified. He had seen you dancing half-naked on the stage. The boy you had liked for so long just saw you stripping!
"Stop." You walk faster. "Stop!" You run to your car and get in closing and locking the doors behind you. He comes up to your door and tries to open it. "Get out of the car. Please!"
You fumble with the keys as you try to get it in the ignition.
"Please open the door. Don't go." He continues to try and open the door.
You finally start the car and Osferth backs up as you drive away. Wiping the tears from your face.
A/N: This was supposed to be a Valentine's special that I never finished in time. But I wanted to get it done so I could focus on my Mitchell Estates series!
The next one should be out next week!
Please let me know what you think and if you wish to be on my Ewan Mitchell Taglist!
Gen Taglist: @thought--bubble, @valeskafics
#ewan nation#ewanverse#ewan mitchell verse#ewan mitchell#ewan mitchell fanfic#osferth#osferth x reader#baby monk#osferth x you#osferth fanfic#the last kingdom#fluff
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Lazy Bones
Relationship : Guy & Guy's Dad, Guy & his parents
Tags : Father-Son Relationship, Dysfunctional Family, Mental Health Issues, Angst, Hurt-no-Comfort, Executive Dysfunction, Guy is more similar to his dad than he thought much to his dismay, and he has to grit his teeth and move on Toxic Family Dynamic
Word Count : 1,772
ao3 notes: something something he's gonna make it through this year if it kills him /j; both guy and his father are hinted to have mental health issues that i didn't specify for fear of ruining the immersion, but i do have a specific condition in mind when i wrote them this way
Guy knew what sort of day it was as soon as he woke up that afternoon.
His small dorm room was a vacuum, where time moved both like molasses and the speed of light. The dollar-store curtains did little to keep the afternoon sun away from the room. The AC slowly hummed. He could hear laughter outside- probably people coming back from class. His bones were stationary, and the defeated sort of embrace of the blanket welcomed him like a home.
He mentally started counting down from ten and forced himself to move. He slowly made his way to the bathroom in the muted darkness, wincing when he accidentally kicked something plastic and sent it skidding across the floor. He’ll get it later.
Guy found himself in front of the bathroom mirror and recognized what was in his eyes as something pathetic. The look on his face was familiar, and he’d seen that look a million times before.
He hated what he saw.
—
Small hands slowly nudged a weary shoulder that early June. Everything was hazy in the heat of summer. A talk show- no, a sports program, was playing in the background from the CRT screen.
“Dad. Daaad. Play with me,” he whined at the fresh age of five. “I’ll be the fire truck, ‘an you’ll be the train.”
His Dad, a mountain of a man impossible to climb, laid himself against his chair. In that house, everyone shared everything except for that chair in the corner of the living room. That chair was his, and over the years, it’d soon mold itself into the shape of his body and its fabric would be stained with his beer.
“Why don’t ‘cha bother your mom, instead, huh?” he grunted, unmoving.
“She’s at the store,” Guy replied.
“Go outside, or something. Y’know when I grew up, we used to just go to the woods and just. Played with sticks. You young’uns are soft, always need coddlin’ and buggerin’. Can’t even sit still for a second.”
He looked up at his father’s stubbled, rugged face. Marred by the heat of the sun. “I can do that?!”
“Sure, son,” the man looked at him with an almost sad sort of look. His labored arm, wiry and thick from long hours at the auto shop, reached out to muss up his hair. “Your Pa’s… tired.”
Guy was hunting for bugs in the backyard when his mother came back home from the store and yelled at her husband for letting him get dirty. And for sitting there all day, never doing anything useful. And that she wished that she never married someone who’d give up so easily as him.
He remembered that his father was tired a lot.
—
Guy did the least he could do. He brushed his teeth and had a single slice of bread for breakfast. Anything is better than nothing, a dear friend told him. He guessed it was right because, on days when he felt like he wanted to let the mattress mold itself to the shape of his body, the only way he could survive was by keeping the ball rolling. A routine- or some form of it. What he did barely counted as one, but it was better than letting himself fall into the trap of falling back asleep.
He opened the laptop, checked the calendar, and mentally kicked himself.
The deadline was today.
Guy liked to believe that he was a capable, competent person. But as soon as he opened the word document to write the last act of his script- a task that he’d put off from days before- his mind was full of noise.
He craved mind-numbing comfort, so he sought it. He sunk into his chair and scrolled on his phone. In the back of his mind, he felt angry.
_
Business was rough for the auto shop, and it later closed when Guy was sixteen. His dad never looked for another job- and he soon took his role as a stay-at-home father.
The arguments soon died down, maybe because his parents had already worn each other out by that point. They barely saw each other anyway- his mother’s job at the hospital as a residential nurse kept it that way.
His father was itching for control- and home was the only thing close enough to that.
He was neurotic about where things were supposed to be. The chairs were supposed to be aligned with the floorboards, and Guy has had to sweep the floors multiple times. If a strand of his hair was found- it’d send his father into ballistics.
Hair was another issue.
“Isn’t it time for a haircut?” his dad asked as he vacuumed, without ever meeting Guy in the eyes.
"I like it this way,” he replied.
“Makes you look like a chick.”
—
The videos on his phone flashed colors and various soundbites. It felt incomprehensible to him, and his mind fell into the space between awareness and daydream- a thick fog.
He didn’t feel like catching the deadline. Maybe he should just give up and not do it. He could lie down and not do anything at all.
“This is how I stayed productive even on days when I was exhausted and didn’t have any motivation. The Eisenhower matrix can help you manage your time-” the YouTube video droned and Guy felt himself slip away.
He probably was just lazy. He needed one day to get himself together and he could train himself to have discipline and not rely on motivation, or start time blocking, or start writing bullet journals and get his life together.
—
Guy grew to realize that he hated his father. Hated the way he seemed to always park himself in front of the TV and not shower for days. Disgusting and good-for-nothing. The way he would only get up to go around the house and make sure that everything was in pristine condition. Unused, untouched. Guy hadn’t eaten in his dining room for ages.
His father could’ve tried if he wanted to. He could’ve applied for other jobs, could’ve cared more about him. But he wallowed in the unknown frustrating corners of his mind and let days pass him by.
He could see the weight sagging his mother’s shoulders-the exhaustion in her eyes as she picked him up from school before going to her night shift.
Guy’s biggest fantasy when he was growing up was for his parents to get a divorce. It never came, and in a sick and twisted way, they did need each other to survive. She needed the illusion of a family, and he needed the money.
“Why can’t you do it for me!” he yelled in a particularly heated fight.
“I’m doing this for you! What do you even want?! For this family to be torn apart and to become the talk of the town?”
“I don’t need you to stay together when all you do is yell at each other,” he pleaded.
“You don’t understand,” she said and ended their discussion there.
—
Before he knew it, it was dark outside and he hadn’t written a single word for his script. The deadline was in five hours, and he was sure that he’d be dropped from the project if he didn’t manage to make it.
He sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. A mix of voices rang in his skull: ‘The deadline is in five hours. You’ve done nothing, stupid.’ And ‘maybe you should eat something. You’re hungry, and you’ve only had bread.’ with ‘you should try starting now. You can still fight for this gig. It’s not over yet.’
Guy stood up and approached the pile of laundry on the corner of his bed. He mechanically folded them and arranged them in his drawer of clothes. It gave him the feeling that he had his life together. He hated the fact that he had to do such an ordeal just to do basic tasks. Double the effort for half the result.
Everything felt like a hill he had to climb. Strategies, timers, to-do lists, tricks. It was frustrating, the fact that he was so damaged that he couldn’t straightforwardly do anything.
Tears started to cloud his vision and all he could do was blink them away in anger. Anger at himself for being affected by people who do not care for him in the slightest (A lie, he will soon realize. They did care- but it was the only sort of care that they understood.) He hated that he was a carbon copy of his father despite having tried so desperately to be different.
He studied hard in school, and he worked double, and triple shifts at Max’s to support himself. But he couldn’t escape from what he was. This… sickness, the willingness to give up so easily was passed down from his father like a curse. It was in his blood, written in his bones. At the end of the day, he was still his father’s son.
—
The thing is, his dad did try. Between the narcissist, and the mid-life crisis-ridden man, there were glimpses of what he was underneath it all. What he could’ve been.
He remembered when it stormed all morning before he had to turn in a science project for freshman year in high school. He’d woken up late, and by the time he was at the bus stop, lugging poster board and styrofoam diagrams in a wheelbarrow behind him, it’d left.
His father had run to catch up with him with an umbrella.
“I’ll walk ‘ya to school. Don’t want ‘em to get wet when you’d barely sleep making them.”
It’d been embarrassing. For someone his age to be walked to school by his dad. But all he noticed was the fact that his father had leaned the umbrella completely over him and the wheelbarrow. He was drenched, and he’d never been too fond of the cold.
“I can wear my jacket,” he mumbled. “Just tilt it your way. You’re getting wet.”
“Doesn’t matter,” his dad replied. “The only thing that matters is for you to get to school okay. Get good grades so you don’t become a loser.”
—
Guy wiped his tears and sat himself back down in front of the laptop. He let the all-encompassing, overwhelming mix of anger and sadness run through him. He wasn’t going to fuck it up. He wouldn’t let anything get in the way of the work that he loved doing. He gritted his teeth and did it even when every part of him protested.
Despite his father, despite his restless mind.
Despite it all, he’ll die fighting, bruised.
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gamer boys are the easiest target for you. they barely interact with any other woman so the moment you find out haechan was a gamer boy, you promised to sit on his lap any time he wanted to.
warnings : cock sucking, boob job, fingering, finger sucking, pussy slapping (like, once)
taglist : @matchahyuck @jiminsfiilter @jaemjunie @babyjenono @woniebuns @thegracerammy @jyowui (couldn't tag the last two)
note: as the starter of this series, i would like to tell you guys that reader doesn't actually have sex with most of the boys except one. because the point is that she uses these men for their attention and doesn't want anything else from them. if you dont like that you can just stop reading from here. please do not complain to me after this. enjoy reading if you stay!
all the seats were taken at the diner when you entered it. even the high stools were all full. some couples, some friends, some families and of course there were people who sat alone. seems like you had to flirt with that guy over there sitting at one of the booth so you could sit with him.
you pasted on a sweet smile, rolled your skirt up to make it shorter and approached the guy that had his headphones on, focusing on his phone. you knocked on his table to make him look at you. he pushed the left side of his headphone to hear you saying "can i sit here with you?"
"oh, sure." the guy pulled his plate towards him so you could have more space on your side of the table. you took the seat across him. as you landed your ass on your seat, his focus went back to his phone.
it annoyed you.
so you tap on one of his hands lightly. he gave you the same look he did a minute ago when you asked to sit with him.
"what are you doing?" you asked curiously. "watching a stream." he answered.
"twitch?" he nodded. "i wanna see." you got up and sat next to him. your face was literally next to his, your cheek touching his headphones. you have no idea who the streamer was but you watched anyway so the guy would be bothered by your presence.
"ooh, can i have an egg salad, fries and a banana milkshake please? thank you!" you called out to the waitress walking past you. you actually wanted to eat a burger but that plan was canceled. there's no way you'd let this hot man witness how sloppy you eat.
"i can't hear him." you whined. no shit, sherlock. he had his headphones on.
he didn't say anything but he did turn his headphones off, placed his phone against the salt and pepper shakers so you two could watch the stream together. he thought you'd sit away from him, now that you didn't have to lean against his headphones to listen to something. but you stayed close to him. you were practically hugging his arm there. this stranger you met not even ten minutes ago.
"you're a gamer?" you asked him.
"yeah."
probably why he's not pushing you away. when else could he have the chance of getting a pretty girl like you to stick on him like glue?
"really? that's so hot. i always wanted to sit on the lap of a gamer guy while he plays his game." you realized how stupid you sound at the moment. you've done that plenty of times. this guy isn't the first. but still, it's your favorite thing because you could feel the guy getting hard underneath you.
"what's your name, by the way? i'm ___." you finally introduced yourself.
"i'm hyuck. donghyuck. i like your stars." he was referring to your hair clips that were star shaped. his compliment made you shriek in excitement. you knew men liked those sounds.
"thank you!" you gave him a kiss on the cheek.
"my food's here!" you did some tiny claps with your fingers, looking at the food you ordered.
"can i uh.. can i get your number, ___?" he suddenly said, scratching his neck awkwardly.
he fell right inside your trap.
"of course!" you took out your lipstick and started writing digits on his arm.
donghyuck was confused as to why you did that. you could've just typed it in his phone.
-
"people actually still do that?" donghyuck's best friend, mark looked at him weird. and then donghyuck smirked. "i'm telling you. this is legit, bro. i had red numbers on my arm."
"she's like so hot but she still has a little side of cute in her too." donghyuck described you. and just at that moment, he received a call from you. he displayed your name to mark, shaking the phone in front of his face. "she's into me."
she's really not.
"hello?"
"hyuck!" you whined. "i'm so lonely. what are you doing? can i come over?" he couldn't see you but you still made a cute little face.
"of course you can, baby. come here. i'm just about to start my gaming session."
you giggled. "you called me baby."
"and does baby like it?"
"she likes it."
"then hurry here. i'll let you sit on me if you come fast enough." he convinced you as if you wouldn't have some sly tricks down your sleeves to make him let you sit on him while he plays.
not more than 20 minutes later, you arrived at donghyuck's shared apartment with mark. you still haven't met this mark yet and he wasn't there when you came. if you saw him, you'd probably try getting his attention too.
"hyuckie!" you spread your arms up high, asking for a hug from this gamer boy you've met for only three times, fourth if you count the lunch time at the diner.
he immediately gave you the hug and you snuggled against his chest. "i can feel your heartbeat." you said. he kissed the top of your head, catching the scent of your citrus shampoo.
"what does my heartbeat tell you?" he rested his chin on your head. "it's telling me that you like having me here." he laughed at your answer, pulling out of the hug and guiding you to his gaming set.
"i'm streaming today." he sat on his gaming chair, patting his thigh to invite you to sit on him. usually you'd sit facing the pc to see the game and how it's played. but today you felt too lazy to pretend to care about that. you sat facing him, hiding your face on his neck as you gave it lazy kisses.
"hi guys." he started speaking to his viewers. you hoped that some guys you messed with some time in the past would see this and recognize you and feel jealous of hyuck for being the man that got you now.
"is she your girlfriend?" he read a comment.
"are you?" he looked at you and you just winked, making him laugh. he left the viewer's question unanswered.
"flip her skirt." he read another comment which made you perk up. "guys, my channel isn't 18+. i'm not gonna make her flash you." you smiled, snuggling closer to him. you wouldn't mind it if he made you flash his viewers without even asking you.
soon enough, you got bored with just sitting on his lap and not doing anything. he isn't even getting hard underneath you, not to mention his attention that's fully towards his game. why were you even there?
you pushed his headphones away a little so he could hear your whisper. "hyuck, let's make out." he didn't say anything, focus still on his game as his fingers clicked on his keyboard.
so you started grinding on his lap, not caring about his viewers anymore. he turned off his microphone before talking to you.
"baby, let me finish this round first then we can make out." you shook your head and whined. "i want you to kiss me now." you pout your lips. "baby, i-"
you shut him up with your lips, finally getting what you wanted from him. you licked up his mouth, exploring it. your hands behind his neck so he can't pull away.
you hear a faint sound from his headphones that indicated that he lost the game.
but he pushed your arms and pulled away anyway. you had a feeling that he's mad at you. gamer boys' rage can be dramatic but if he got mad at you or yelled at you, you'd leave him that very moment. you hate men who yell at women. their attention wouldn't matter anymore at that point.
"get on the bed." he said. and you smiled in victory, seeing him ending his live. you giggled when you landed your ass on his bed, can't wait for him to get on the bed too.
you stuck your tongue out at him so he could immediately suck on it. "naughty girl." he chuckled. you didn't care about anything else when he finally landed his lips on yours, taking away each other's breath. you could feel him getting hard as it kept hitting your thighs.
gamers are so easy.
"hyuck, wanna suck you off." you said when he pulled away to catch his breath. "what?" he thought he misheard it.
"let me suck you off. i know you're hard and it's because of me. so let me help you." your fingers played with the strings of his sweatpants, waiting for his agreement.
"fuck, yeah. go ahead, baby. take my dick out and suck it. on your knees now." he told and you find it hilarious how he's trying to dom you when you've got the upper hand from day one. but you followed his instructions anyway, getting down from the bed to get on your knees. you pulled his sweatpants and his underwear down, revealing his hard and throbbing cock.
the thought that you caused this made you dizzy. you feel powerful. hyuck has no idea. he sat down on his bed, having your face in between his legs.
you started jerking it off while looking at him with round eyes. you even leaned your face on his thigh, moving your hand on his dick lazily. looking so innocent while doing something so unholy. you opened your mouth and let his cock rest on your tongue without actually sucking it. "baby, none of that please. just suck my cock like a good girl." he groaned and you giggled.
deciding to be nice, you closed your mouth around his cock as you moved forward so your nose hits his tummy. you let your tongue out so it could reach for his balls underneath. then, you moved back and then forward again. you loved the sounds that he's making. you loved the feeling of his dick twitching in your mouth. and you know you will love the way he pours his cum into you.
"you're so good at this." his eyes were closed and his head was thrown back. you suddenly had an idea of how to make this more pleasurable.
you took off your shirt, leaving your bra on so your breasts were perked together. you started rubbing his cock with your boobs while you kissed the tip that's peaking out. "fuck, you're so sexy looking like that." he started caressing your hair, praising you. the way he moaned louder and louder convinced you that he was close.
"wanna cum on your pretty face." even if you had different ideas, you're still fine with making his wish come true. so you moved your breasts on him faster as you started sucking on his tip.
"gonna cum. gonna cum. gonna cum. fuck, baby. fuck. paint your face with my cum. close your eyes"
and he did just that. his juice landed everywhere on your face. you're glad he reminded you to close your eyes. you could feel it dripping from your eyelashes to your cheeks. he moaned at the sight, loving his masterpiece.
"you can take a picture, hyuck."
"shit. stay still, okay?" he left the bed to look for his phone.
"open your mouth and stick your tongue out, please." he started taking your pictures. once he's done, he swipes his cum away from your eyes.
"you wanna continue?" he asked but you immediately stood up. "actually i have plans with my girl friends tonight. you can help me clean my face though."
you washed your face in his bathroom and he helped you redo your makeup since he's the one who ruined it. you sat on his sink, facing him. you had him standing in between your legs. "just stroke it up." you guided him to apply mascara on you. "what if i poke your eye?" he worried but you took his hand and showed him how it's done.
"you can take it slow. i'm in no rush." you ensured him.
"maybe you should just bail." he pulled the mascara wand away from your face. "awwh, but i haven't met my girls in so long." as if you actually cared about meeting them. convinced enough, hyuck continues to help you apply your make up.
seeing him this close, with such a focused face made you count his moles and admired how beautiful he actually is. once he was done with your mascara, you pulled him into a kiss, softer than your make out session from before. then you started giving kisses on his moles.
when you pulled away, hyuck had his fingers on your chin. "want me to eat you out, baby?" you bit your lip at his invitation. it was tempting, of course. but you want to keep kissing him too.
you thought of a solution. "maybe fuck me with your fingers? i really like kissing you." you gave his lip a little lick. he chuckled at your suggestion. "and you said you didn't want to continue after swallowing my cum."
he started kissing you again, this time with his fingers teasing your core. "hyuckie, want your fingers in me. don't you want to make me cum on your fingers?" you turned impatient.
"of course, baby. want you to make a mess just from my fingers." you loved the fact that he kept kissing you after you told him that you liked it. your makeup was ruined again at this point but you didn't care. kissing hyuck felt so addicting to you. he looked so pretty like this.
you feel his fingers pushing your panties aside to put it in. you smiled on his mouth. you thought you'd be cumming on your own tonight. you were thankful for making a last minute decision of letting him finger you like this.
he started pumping them in and out if you. "messy baby." he's probably talking about how wet you were and the squelching sounds from both your lips.
"nggh, hyuck. wanna cum." you bit his shoulder and started moving your hips on his fingers, desperate to chase your high.
"fuck, you look so sexy." he fucked his fingers into you faster than before, wanting to see how messy you'd get once he makes you cum for him. "cum, baby. you're doing so well." his lips came back to yours so he'd have you moaning on his mouth.
you started babbling nonsense when you let go and came on him. "fuck, baby. so fucking sexy for me." he slapped your cunt once before bringing his fingers to his mouth, tasting your juices.
"you taste so good. i should really eat you out next time."
next time, huh? as if.
"we have to do my makeup again." you said. "i'm sorry, baby. i'll help you."
you left his apartment after you're sure that you look presentable. but most of all, you left while being sure that all the next times donghyuck jerks off, he'll think of you. he'll use the picture he took and wish you were there to suck him off again. wished he could at least fucked you. but you won't.
this is enough. you made him hard, made him cum, made sure that he thinks of you next time. he'll probably even compare other girls to you.
you won in the game he didn't know he was playing. so who's the gamer now?
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Hello! I'm back with another chapter of my Feyd-Rautha/Reader arranged marriage series.
AO3 link here for full fic: And I Don't Want Your Heart - Chapter 5 - ooihcnoiwlerh - Dune (2021) [Archive of Our Own]
Side post that has some of my headcanons for how I interpret Feyd-Rautha's own relationship to his sexuality: Hello, Friend - So I've been working on a Feyd-Rautha/Reader... (tumblr.com)
This fic and this chapter are 18+ up only. Tags, content warning, and full chapter below the cut
Tags/CW list: rape/noncon; graphic depictions of violence; dubious consent; arranged marriage; forced pregnancy; nature versus nurture; implied/referenced child abuse; implied/referenced sexual assault; implied/referenced incest; first time; rough sex; oral sex; vaginal sex; vaginal fingering; blood kink; pain kink; sadomasochism; period sex; problematic smut; inappropriate misuse of BDSM; slow burn emotionally but the exact opposite of a slow burn phyiscally
CHAPTER FOUR: A BLOODY GASH
You're fertile. You’ve never had any reason to believe otherwise. This union is contingent on giving him children–at least one son, and as many attempts as necessary to get there ( and you desperately hope that you’ll only need that first one. You don’t want to raise a daughter in this place, amongst these people .)
So you’re horrified when you wake up the following morning to blood smeared between your legs, staining your chemise that rode up to your hips when you were sleeping, and leaving a smear on the sheets below when you move.
No. No. You pull up the hem of your chemise and stare at your inner thighs as if just looking will change the outcome. Feyd-Rautha came inside of you four times in two days for nothing . He’ll be furious. He’ll question your very biology. He’ll have you examined as thoroughly and cruelly as possible.
You scramble, trying to cover yourself, wondering what you can even do next when Idrisa comes in with fresh water and coffee.
To her credit, she doesn't drop the tray when her eye line goes directly to your bleeding crotch for the few seconds it’s still visible.
“I knew my time for it was coming up, I just didn't think it would,” you say to yourself as much as her and come to meet her gaze.
She glances back down out of respect, but the awkward tension hangs between the two of you for a moment.
“Do you…” you start, embarrassment flushing your face and neck, “do you have anything for it?” You have no idea how menstrual care even works on Geidi Prime. You’d just assumed that it wouldn’t be an issue for another ten months.
She composes herself again immediately. “Why yes, of course, Na-Baroness. I apologize for my negligence.” Before you can tell her there's nothing to apologize for, she adds, “I'll help you get cleaned up first.”
“That’s alright, I can do it,” you tell her as you wonder for a moment who she served before that she’d assume you want her to clean between your legs when you’re perfectly capable of doing it yourself.
She inclines her head further. “Thank you, Na-Baroness. I’ll be back in just a moment.”
As soon as she’s out the door you’re up and walking briskly to the bathroom.
You’ll need to have the sheets changed.
It’s only been two days, you think, washing between your legs. This doesn’t mean anything bad . When he asks for you, you can just explain the situation and try again in a few days. Until then…until then… For a moment you draw a blank, before remembering a conversation you had a few years ago with a slightly older friend when you asked her if husbands still desired their wives when their wives were bleeding.
“ They honestly just want something warm, soft, and wet to bury themselves in, ” she’d told you matter-of-factly. “ So most men just use their wife’s mouths .”
“ What do you mean? ” you’d asked, fairly certain you had an idea what she was talking about but still more willing to briefly embarrass yourself by asking than remain ignorant.
“ You know what goes on between a man’s legs, right? ” she’d asked in turn.
“ Of course ,” you’d said, a little offended that she’d think you so naive.
“ When you’re bleeding and he still wants you to please him, put your mouth there instead, ” she’d told you. “ Like he’s burying himself inside your mouth instead of your canal. You can’t make babies that way, of course, but they often don’t care about that . You can’t really make babies during your monthly courses anyway. ”
You wonder how she reacted when she found out who you’d be marrying. You never got the chance to ask and assume, like many young women and their parents, that she was relieved that she wasn’t the one hand-picked for him.
You also haven’t done that to him yet, nor any other man, for that matter, and you’re sure your lack of skill will show. How are you meant to take the entire thing in your mouth when you can barely fit it where it’s meant to go? What are you supposed to do with your teeth? It also just seems somehow more daunting and personal than just having inside of you in the traditional manner.
He’ll be aggressive with it, like he is in everything else.
You can’t stop thinking about it as you brush your teeth and hair and try to ignore the discomfort in your lower belly before you hear a click and the door to your quarters opening.
Idrisa’s back with a basket made of some kind of black synthetic material; it’s covered to protect its contents from passing view. You could kiss her for that, you think, and she starts unpacking.
She pulls out what look like thick handkerchiefs, going to your bathroom to stack them neatly on the countertop. She also hands you a canister that you open to find a handful of circular tablets.
“They’re not as strong as what I left for your wedding night,” she says, “and they won’t put you to sleep, but they should suffice if you need them.”
You’d chalked up your cramps to nerves but now that you have your answer the symptoms couldn’t have been more obvious. “Thank you, I think I will,” you tell her as you think about how you’ll likely be expected to join your new family, if one could call them that, for breakfast again. The thought makes you want to crawl back under the covers.
“Can you also please tell Feyd-Rautha that I apologize for missing breakfast but that I'm feeling unwell this morning and wouldn't want to be poor company in my condition?” you ask.
Idrisa hesitates, nervous. You realize that she's thinking, You know that your husband finds me far more disposable than he finds you, right? He could easily kill and replace me and no one would care. You also realize that she can’t and won’t say no to you. But just that look reminds you that as frightening as this fortress is to you, it’s much worse for her. You haven’t seen Feyd-Rautha kill outside of the arena yet, but you also barely know him; killing people who displease him over minor inconveniences, especially if they’re low-born and low-ranking, could be a common occurrence for him. The Harkonnens didn’t earn their reputation for nothing.
“Unless you think they won't notice if I’m even there,” you add, thinking. The Baron couldn't care less if he never has a conversation with you again, and outside of the marriage bed, Feyd-Rautha doesn't appear to have any real plans for you. “I could just…stay here and if Feyd-Rautha has any questions he can ask them.”
Idrisa’s shoulders had been locked and tense but appear to relax just a little at your words. “I can make a plate for you and bring it back here,” she says, already knowing your preference. Given Geidi Prime’s incredible wealth and lack of natural resources other than fuels and metals there are imported fruits that you’d never had before coming here that you’re certain you’ll never get sick of.
“Sounds perfect, thank you,” you tell her, and take advantage of the new medication when she leaves.
When she returns with another tray for you, she’s accompanied by two other girls holding a fresh arrangement of sheets; the hems and necklines of their garb are cut a little different from hers and they look younger, perhaps the same age as your little sister. You wonder if the difference in the way they’re dressed suggests rank? They keep their heads down and don’t acknowledge you other than a silent curtsy before stripping your old sheets and setting down a new spread. You look at them for a moment, wondering if it’s at the Baron’s insistence that no staff ever look a Harkonnen royal in the eye or if this rule’s been going on for generations when Idrisa snaps you out of your thoughts.
“I have a tea prepared for you as well, Na-Baroness,” she says, gesturing towards the tray that she’s set on your end-table and removing the cloche covering your plate. “It’s not medicine strictly speaking but it has soothing properties.”
You turn and look at her. She doesn’t look much older than you, but the same can be said of most of the female slaves. Are they banished to where they won’t be easily seen when they reach a certain age? What’s the life expectancy? It feels more than a little insensitive to ask right now, so you just let them work as you take a seat at your end-table and take a sip of your tea.
After breakfast is over and you’ve found a comfortable position sitting up in bed, propped up by the pillows and headboards, you read a bit more on the Harkonnen lineage. The more you read, the more you understand why Father always insisted that Geidi Prime is no place for a woman. Women in high places, you find, have in history been assassinated more often than the men, or kidnapped to use as collateral and tortured. You wonder if that’s why you saw so few at the wedding and reception, why they seemed so hidden out of view even while accompanying their high-ranking husbands.
You’re reasonably certain that your new husband’s concerned enough with his image as heir to the Harkonnen throne not to tarnish the alliance your marriage has created, that even if he doesn’t really know you and may never love you–you’re reasonably certain that he’s incapable of feeling such an emotion–he’ll still make sure to protect what he sees as his. His uncle will likely be another story.
The door opens unannounced and you look up, expecting Idrisa only to find Feyd-Rautha letting himself in without a word and closing the door behind him. He doesn’t speak at first, but everything in his demeanor tells you that he did in fact notice your absence and wants an explanation.
You compose yourself. There’s no need to panic. “Good afternoon, husband. To what do I owe the pleasure?” you ask, tone as light and cool as the weather would be on your home planet right now.
He leans against the door as he folds his arms across his chest and looks you over. “I missed you at breakfast,” he says.
“Yes, my apologies. I’m not feeling well,” you tell him.
He clearly doesn’t believe you. You don’t seem feverish , he seems to think with his unimpressed gaze. You seem fine . “Still getting adjusted to the atmosphere on Geidi Prime?” he asks, and for a foolish moment you hope that he’s giving you an excuse. Maybe he thinks you’re avoiding him because of last night, and you’re content to let him think that.
“Yes, husband,” you tell him.
“That’s a shame,” he says, crossing over to your bed and sitting at the edge of it. “It occurred to me last night that whoever taught you close-range maneuvers didn’t do their job right. You should’ve been able to evade me.”
You wrinkle your brow and don’t have it in you to hide your insulted glare; your House’s military is considered a force to be reckoned with and a slight against your training is a slight against your House and your father himself. “Did you want me to evade you?” you ask.
He seems amused by your sudden sharpness, and you realize that he’d wanted to hit a nerve. He knew what he was implying and got the precise reaction he’d been hoping for. “That’s not the point, wife. You said yourself that you were out of practice and as soon as you’re feeling better I intend to rectify that. Your cute little boot-dagger won’t serve you any good if you can’t correctly use it.”
He places his hand on your leg, trailing it along your thigh and stopping just shy of your apex, his thumb brushing against it through the fabric of your skirt. You give a sharp inhale that makes him smile. You start to close your legs but his hand, now cupping your inner thigh, holds one open enough for him to continue to fondle as he pleases.
His hand stays there for a moment, stays over the light material of your skirt even as you're sure the soft flesh of your inner thigh heats his palm, as flushed as you feel under his touch. He leans in, inhales as he leans over you and sniffs your hair. It’s not even the first time he’s done it. You wonder if he finds your hair to be a sort of forbidden fruit; something he can’t say he likes because to do so would disrespect Harkonnen hairlessness, but still something he finds fascinating or even enviable. You’re not sure yet whether his lack of it is down to genetics or grooming but you assume the former, if it affects everyone including those who wouldn’t have such prime access to constant shaving.
But then he fully brings his hand between your legs, fingertips rubbing up against you and you flinch.
Now? Is he going to try and fuck me right here and now? You shift, trying to hide what you’re sure is a look of panic on your face, trying to scramble for an excuse as Feyd-Rautha rubs a whimper out of you.
In the moments he does and you freeze, he watches your face a moment longer and then something shifts in his eyes, and he pulls back.
“I’ll call on you soon,” he says. There’s something satisfied, almost smug in his tone. He doesn’t wait for a response from you before he gets up and leaves, and you wonder what caused his departure.
Idrisa comes in a minute later with more tea for you. “The Na-Baron seems mollified,” she says. “He’s taken the news well.”
“I didn’t tell him.”
You catch Idrisa furrowing her brow-line, incredulous even with her head bowed before she can smooth over her expression into one of polite indifference.
“He doesn’t need to know yet,” you tell her. “He said he’d call on me later.”
“My apologies for speaking boldly, Na-Baroness,” she says, “but the Na-Baron will still take you to bed tonight or whenever he decides is convenient. Harkonnen men expect their wives to always be available to them, no matter how they’re feeling.”
You suppose you already knew this. It certainly doesn’t help the gnawing feeling in your stomach even as the medicine Idrisa gave you has soothed the cramps for now.
“It appears I can hold him off until after dinner, at least,” you finally say. There’s that; you also appreciate having another meal without the Baron’s presence.
You wish you had someone you could talk to about this in which it wouldn’t feel weird to ask. You look over at Idrisa. She’s the only friend you’ve managed to make so far and while you don’t see that changing anytime soon, you haven’t forgotten that she keeps you company out of obligation. You can’t be certain as to whether or not she actually likes you, or if she only tolerates you due to her heightened position within the Harkonnen Fortress as your personal attendant. Still, she’s certainly better than no one to ask. She takes your old mug and heads for the door.
“Idrisa,” you start. She turns. “You’ve…have you been with men before?”
She inclines her head in a polite nod. “When it’s required of me,” she says.
Your second question dies in your mouth. Oh. Right . Yet again you’re disgusted but can’t say you’re all that surprised.
And instead of asking for advice you’re struck by another thought. “Has the Na-Baron ever…?” you start and she immediately shakes her head.
“Never, Na-Baroness,” she assures you. “He has never been known to satiate himself that way with slaves.”
Are you being honest or telling me what I want to hear? you almost ask but spare her the indignity. You’re reasonably certain that if Feyd-Rautha had taken advantage of her, he’d have gloated to you about it. “Thank you,” you tell her. You don’t want to know how men on Geidi Prime have abused her mouth. “I was just curious.”
“Not at all, Na-Baroness,” she says.
As the hours tick by you wish you'd just told Feyd-Rautha your situation and gotten whatever awkward ensuing conversation over with.
In the evening Idrisa brings you dinner, more tea, and a glass of wine. “The Na-Baron has given you two hours before expecting you in his bedchambers.”
You sigh. “Thank you, Idrisa,” you tell her, not quite willing to add, you were right . You eat, you have your tea, you bathe and clean your hair. And in the remaining time that you have before you need to leave, you sip your wine. You’d be foolish to assume that it will truly settle your nerves, but it tastes nice.
“I guess it’s time,” you say finally, looking at the timepiece on your nightstand. “How angry do you think he’ll be?”
“I’m afraid I don’t know, Na-Baroness,” Idrisa says as she opens the door to lead you to your husband. “He’s never been married nor been instructed to sire an heir before.”
When you get to his bedroom he’s already standing in the middle of it, wearing only black pants with a relaxed fit that suggests leisure, maybe sleep. And here you hadn’t taken him as the kind of man to own pajamas.
He looks over your shoulder at Idrisa, who seems just as surprised to see him as you are even as she immediately lowers her head in deference.
“Dismissed,” he tells her, and she curtsies and scurries out of the room, closing the door behind her, leaving the two of you alone and rather more dressed than you’ve been in this room.
You stand, awkwardly, playing with the sash to your robe as the two of you look at each other in silence. Or rather, he stares at you and you look down, knowing what you’d rehearsed and still needing to force the words out.
“My apologies, husband, but it’s my time of month,” you finally manage.
“I know,” he says. “I could smell it on you. I could feel your rag in between your legs.”
Was that what he was doing? You look up at his face and find nothing that you can really parse and pause, unsure what you could say to that, before you move on.
“I know it’s not ideal, but we can try again in a few days, and in the meantime,” you try to sound like you’re not as nervous as you are, fully aware that seduction was never something you learned, “I know that there are…other ways to satisfy you.” A few days and we can resume trying to secure your firstborn .
He gives a small smirk at the second part of your statement but comments only on the first. “A few days?” he repeats, as if you’ve just said either the funniest or dumbest thing he’s heard all week. “What makes you think I care to wait a few days?”
You’re not sure you heard him right. “The blood,” you say slowly. “I can’t control it.”
“You think a Harkonnen would be scared of a little blood?” he says.
You’re not sure what to say to that. In hindsight, you’re not sure why you’d assumed that this man of all men would be too squeamish to fuck a bleeding woman.
“Strip down,” he says, after the seconds of silence that follow. He sounds so casual as he says it, as if he just told you to have a seat. You hesitate, still unsure if he’s being serious.
“Did you not understand me?” he prompts when seconds tick by and you haven’t moved.
“I do, husband,” say. “But still, I have to warn you that it’ll make a mess.”
“Y/N,” he says, his tone somehow light. There’s an element of danger to it. “You’re not the one who’ll have to clean up afterwards.”
Nor you , you think. “So you want me in this state.” You don’t phrase it as a question but he can hear the confusion in your voice.
The smirk never quite left his face but returns in full as he crosses the few steps over to you that leaves you close enough that you can feel his breath. He takes your wrist and presses your hand to his groin–it’s rapidly filling out.
“What do you think?” he says.
You gasp, almost giving an incredulous laugh as you glance between his face and back down to his groin. Harkonnen men are built differently, you suppose.
You pull away enough to unravel your robe and step out of your slippers. He doesn’t object to your garments being left on his floor instead of neatly tucked on his dresser, so you keep going, pulling your chemise over your shoulders, pulling down your undergarment and letting it slide down your legs, until you’re bared entirely for him.
He looks down at the blood that gathered in the kerchief lining the gusset of your undergarment as it hits the floor and you step out of it, and then he looks back at you.
“Hold your arms out like this, wrists together,” he says, extending his own to demonstrate.
He still doesn’t seem angry, his tone suggesting patience that you know he doesn’t have, but you hesitate before mimicking him.
“Very nice,” he says, and you bristle at his condescension as he half-circles you before heading for his armoire. You turn around to watch him open it, and your jaw drops when you see what’s inside.
It’s lined with whips, rope, chains, knives, scalpels, collars, and other items you’ve never seen before but if this is in his bedroom then it must serve one particular purpose, either on himself whoever has the misfortune of being with him when he wants to use any of these devices.
He glances over his shoulder and looks if anything delighted by your stunned reaction, the growing sense of dread. “I didn’t say you could drop your arms,” he says, and turns back to pick out a length of black rope.
You suppose you ought to be grateful that he didn’t pick out any chains.
You watch as he loops an intricate tie binding your wrists. He does it with such practiced ease he looks directly into your eyes as he does it. You manage to hold his gaze in defiance even as your heart hammers in your chest and you’re scared of what’s going to happen next. You know that, like a true Harkonnen, he likes your fear, but it hasn’t occurred to either of you yet that he also appreciates your fire.
“Get on all fours on the bed, pet,” he says, tone light and playful as much as his gravely timbre can make it.
You try to keep your eyes on him as much as possible, making sure he’s never fully out of your sightline as you get on the bed, squirming but managing to maneuver the position he wants while your wrists are bound. He knows that you don’t trust him, and if anything that seems to elevate his excitement.
Good girl, he seems to be thinking. He looks you over, turning and sauntering so he can take a moment to gaze first at your naked profile, then at your backside.
You have to keep reminding yourself that he won’t do anything that will risk you being able to give him children as he turns away and pads over to his armoire. For a moment you’re not sure if he’s trying to decide what he’d like to use, or if he’s purposefully biding his time to make you more nervous. His fingertips seem to dance over the whips, then the chains. He briefly touches the handle to one of his knives.
Not the scalpel. Please not the scalpel.
You see it–corded leather. A black whip with multiple knotted tails. He takes it down from his display but leaves the armoire doors open–undoubtedly to keep reminding you of what else he could be and very likely will be doing to you in the future.
You think about the Bene Gesserit Litany and try to repeat it in your head as you consider the tool? the weapon? clutched in his fist. At first glance the whip looks like the cat-of-nine-tails your brother-in-law seems so fond of. However, when you shut your eyes, take a breath, and think of the words– fear is the mind-killer –you realize when you open your eyes again that what Feyd-Rautha’s holding is a lot smaller than a proper cat-of-nine-tails and the tails thicker. You have no doubt that this is going to hurt, but it doesn’t look like it will rip you apart.
“What, what is this? A punishment for bleeding? ” you finally ask, unable to handle the silence anymore and because that’s the only explanation you can imagine.
And yet Feyd-Rautha looks amused that you’d suggest it. “It’s because I want to use it on you,” he says, as if any further explanation would be silly. “Ever since I first saw you, I wondered what that pretty ass of yours would look like after I’d taken this to it.” He holds up the device for emphasis. “I wondered what noises you’d make. I wanted to know what you’d look like with your wrists bound, naked and helpless in my bed. What you’d look like squirming and bleeding.
“ Yesterday was a punishment,” he adds. “This is just fun.”
For you, perhaps, you think. It’s no matter; you’ll just have to prove that you can take whatever he dishes out. You just have to decide whether it’s better or worse that he’s not doing this out of anger.
“Are you scared, pet?” he asks.
“ No, ” you lie in the most adamant and dignified tone you can muster, and once again he acts like what you’ve said is cute. He clicks his tongue.
“You mustn’t lie to me in bed, pet,” he says, approaching the bed again, his free hand skimming over your ribcage, your side, your hip, as he finally stands beside the bed, and ever-so-slowly draws the corded whip up and down the backs of your thighs. The tassels brush gently against your skin and it feels perverse, the anticipation he’s building within you. On his second pass you inhale sharply, shutting your eyes, hips twitching away from the device, and Feyd-Rautha chuckles at that.
“Relax,” he says.
Fuck you. You know I can’t. Just do it and get it over with , you want to tell him with your sharp exhale, and one second later he draws his hand back and brings the whip down.
You cry out, rocking forward, your entire body clenching up as much from shock as pain. Nothing could really prepare you for this; his hand from the first night had been easier, more personal. The individual cords spread out like a fractal tree, like cracks in a block of ice fanning out.
The second time is less sharp, more of a thud that reverberates through your body, the impact reverberating in your pulse. Tears prick up at the corners of your eyes and for a moment you can’t breathe. It would figure that this man has used this device often enough that he knows how to inflict different flavors of pain depending on whether he’s putting the movement in his wrist or his forearm. You clench your fists, waiting for the next lash, and then the next.
Your nerves are on fire. You can barely think, barely focus on anything but the exquisite pain on impact, the sharp sting of the air against your impacted flesh, the sweet moments you adjust, finding your breath, before he comes down again. You don’t scream, not after the first blow, but the tears forming at the corners of your eyes start trickling down your face and then drop directly onto your forearms the covers below you when you bow your head.
You don’t know how long he keeps going, don’t keep count. The pain starts to dull but the intensity becomes overwhelming as he compounds on every lash. Your ears are ringing. You taste iron at the back of your throat. The worst part is that you find, to your horror, your nipples feel stiff. You start to feel wet.
It has to be a fear response. This isn’t enjoyable . It’s intense, it’s painful, and you can’t help but feel shame lance through you that your body would react this way.
Please. I can’t take any more , you want to tell him, but opt instead to whimper through your clenched teeth.
At that moment the whip comes down and it sends you toppling forward, finally collapsing. The covers are soft against your tear-stained cheek. You shut your eyes, panting, waiting for him to haul you back up and continue the process.
But nothing happens. You don’t try to look behind you and hope that he’s done. You just take a rattling breath and listen for the sound of the whip and its tendrils slicing through air, and it doesn’t come.
“You lasted longer than I thought you would,” Feyd-Rautha says, the first time he’s spoken in minutes, and you open your eyes and turn your head to see him twist the coils of his whip and head over to the armoire.
“Come on,” he says over his shoulder. “Back into position, pet.”
You grit your teeth and force yourself back up on your hands and elbows. “Good,” he adds softly, and it’s embarrassing how one single word of praise makes you flush, sends a pleasant tingle down your spine. This shouldn’t have the effect on you that it does–maybe it’s because now that it’s over, you feel lighter, almost dazed. All of your muscles had tightened into coils, but now you feel pliant to the point that your limbs feel rubbery. You’re exhausted. You’re hurt. You don’t know what else he has on the agenda for you tonight but you just hope it doesn’t involve another one of his whips or ropes.
He sets the device back in the armoire and turns to face you. He looks at your flushed, tear-stained face and smiles, mouth-closed before approaching the bed, his cock hard in his pants, and even though part of you wants nothing more than to melt into the bed and to get some relief for your stinging backside, you know he’s still going to chase his own pleasure.
‘He’ll want your mouth,’ you remember.
You won’t wait for him to force it or grind your face into his privates. If that’s what he wants, you’ll get there first, and so you drop your head and fumble as you reach with bound wrists for the fly of his pants.
You’re focused on what’s directly in your eyeline, so you don’t see his brief look of surprise, but you hear his voice, sounding pleased. “Let me help you with that, pet,” he says, pulling away long enough to pull his pants down, stepping out of them.
It’s even more daunting when it’s this close to your face, but he steps back in, cradling your jaw, and you lean in and lick the tip of him.
For a few seconds that’s all you know to do, to lick around him, feeling the ridges and veins under your tongue. It’s all the verification he could possibly need that you’ve never done this before, and that spurs him on, cradling your head in one large hand as the other guides himself past your lips and into your mouth.
It confirms what you suspected; he’s too big to take all the way and thankfully, doesn’t try to make you.
Not yet, a part of you thinks. You try to breathe, try not to get your teeth on him, try to relax and close your eyes as he controls the pace. It’s easy enough at first; far from the rutting of the past couple of nights. It doesn’t occur to you that, by his standards anyway, he’s being gentle with you. Doesn’t occur to you to wonder why. You just try to keep up as your backside and the backs of your thighs sting like hell and you hope Idrisa will have some sort of lotion for it when you get back to your quarters.
Feyd-Rautha appears to have yet another reason to like your hair, it seems, as he threads his fingers through it, guiding you onto him in slowly greater increments until he’s suddenly over halfway in and you freeze, nearly gagging, forgetting how to breathe.
He holds you in place for a moment, just long enough for your eyes to widen as you glance up at him and his heavy-lidded eyes and chest heaving with arousal. He waits until you’re about to struggle and tear away from him before he relinquishes your hair and steps away, pulling out. You take a deep breath, gulping the air down.
“Stay right there,” he says, and settles in behind you, stroking your hindquarters like you’re a horse that he’s trying to calm down. Will he put a saddle on you next? You exhale hard through your nose, mouth pursing, waiting for what he’ll do next. Will he mark up the stinging raw skin he’s already flogged with his hand?
Fine. Fuck you again. I can take whatever you’ve got. I can handle it , you want to tell him out of spite. You sense him shift, dipping his head, and despite your steeled nerves can’t help but gasp and feel something flutter in your core when you feel his breath against your lower back.
What exactly is he–? is all you have time to think before he dives in.
You jolt and wriggle in shock as he licks over one of your growing welts; you can’t quite tell but wouldn’t be surprised if he broke skin. However, it’s how his tongue glides over your backside before shifting his weight to your folds that sends waves of shock, revulsion, and excitement as you cry out, stunned.
He’s licking my wounds .
You’re trying to wrap your head around how salacious it is that his lips and tongue alternate between licking the impacted skin on your buttocks and the backs of your thighs and dipping his tongue inside of you. He has your hips firmly in place, which serves him well given that you’re torn between recoiling away from the heat of his mouth and wanting to press back against it. You can feel him smirk at the sounds of your shocked moans.
He pulls away long enough to turn you on your back and you wince at the impact before you see him slide down along the bed and continue the onslaught. You can hardly believe it as he grabs your still-stinging buttocks and buries his face against your bleeding pussy.
This is disgusting , part of you thinks. Another part of you can hardly understand what’s happening. In all your years you’ve never met a man who didn’t recoil hearing about monthly courses. You’ve never heard of anyone wanting to taste a…a bloody gash .
Your wrists are still bound, and you grip onto the pillows above your head as he lifts your thighs to rest over his shoulders and dives back in, tongue pressing inside of you.
It feels incredible. You’d prefer it if it didn’t. More than anything else, you don’t want to be enjoying this, wish the continuous whines and moans he’s drawing out of you were insincere, but he can feel as well as you do that you mean every sound. You, Lady Y/N of the powerful and dignified house of Y/H, are getting your bloody pussy licked by the ruthless barbarian Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen and Great Mother and every forgotten old god, you’re enjoying every visceral and shocking moment of it.
He knows it, too, the smug bastard. He probably feels even more powerful like this, on his belly and with his face between your legs, than he did when he was tanning your hide.
He raises one hand from your hip to your breast, giving one of your nipples a cruel pinch, smirking against your slit as you whimper in protest, and continues. His nose presses and rubs against your bud in the onslaught and you finally admit to yourself that any last vestiges of resistance you might have had has caved when you squirm, rocking your hips upwards and desperately wishing that your wrists were free so you could press his face closer into you.
He keeps up his pace, bringing you as close to the edge as possible without reaching it until finally, mercifully, he shifts his mouth to your bud, his fingers replacing his tongue inside of you. Your unrestrained cries fill the room, spurring him on, and then the force of it hits you as he brings you over the precipice for the first time. It feels like it comes in shockwaves, especially as he keeps going through it all.
You’re still pulsing and squirming against his tongue when he stops, raising himself up and leaning over you. Inky, sticky blood coats the lower part of his face, from his chin to his nostrils, and you’re a little surprised at how the sight doesn’t alarm you as much as it probably should, especially since that’s your blood covering his face.
There are far worse ways he could be smeared with your blood . You gasp, still, at the striking color against the pallor of his face, reminded of seeing him in the arena.
He presses damp, open-mouthed kisses against your stomach, your ribcage, your breasts and collarbone, as if to mark you with it. Finally he sits up, bringing your legs over his as he guides himself into you with his bloodied fingers.
He stays upright as he pulls you onto him, and you watch his face as he looks down where you’re joined, his groan like a rumble in his chest as he sees himself pumping in and out of your bleeding pussy. He won’t last long, you realize. He’s been holding himself back from fucking you into the mattress since he visited you in your chambers hours ago.
He curves in then, bracing one hand above your head to grip your still-bound wrists as his other hand grabs your hip to keep you stable. You realize what he’s about to do a split second before it can happen.
He’s going to kiss you with that bloody mouth .
You tamp down on the revulsion of it and the coppery smell, again refusing to let him shock you or give you anything you can’t take and move in first, leaning up and capturing his mouth in a kiss.
He groans into it, hips pumping, tongue invading your mouth as he speeds up, going hard, hips snapping into you. He’s relentless; this would be agonizing if he hadn’t worked you open and pliant with his lips and tongue and even still, it veers on the edge of being overwhelming. Your whimpers and cries only encourage him.
And then he finally comes, burying his face in the crux of your neck and biting down, not hard enough to draw blood but enough that it will leave a bruise later.
For a moment the two of you stay that way, then he releases your wrists and sinks down onto you, dropping his forehead onto your shoulder as he pulls out and takes a moment to catch his breath. After a moment he raises himself back up on his forearms, pauses, and takes in the sight of your face and your lips stained red before reaching for your wrists again and untying the rope; once freed you notice that your skin’s been chafed rosy but still fully intact.
He gets up, and you watch the lines of his legs, the slope and curve of his buttocks, the taper from his shoulders to his waist as he gets up and sets the rope back in the armoire before finally closing it shut.
Guess he’s done for the night .
But is he going to send me back right away? you wonder, turning to your side to watch the way he moves. It takes some effort. You feel as depleted as a rung-out damp rag.
He approaches the bed and wordlessly holds out his hand, and once you take it guides you to your feet and leads you into this bathroom.
Like his bedroom, it’s larger than yours.
He doesn’t let you wash your blood off your body; he wants it to remain on you until it dries and peels off on its own. Instead he wipes his face, rinses and cleans out his mouth, and gives you a cup of water to do the same. He wipes off in between his legs and then yours, quiet and strangely peaceful. He takes another cloth and wets it, and then grabs a small bottle out of a drawer. “Turn around, hands on the counter,” he says.
Fairly certain you know what he’s about to do, you acquiesce. “Did you draw blood?” you ask over your shoulder.
He shakes his head. “Not this time,” he says. “Wasn’t trying to.” And then he surprises you by getting down on one knee.
You give a small gasp. It just seems…lewd? Subservient? And tired and sore as you are, you can’t help the twinge you feel in between your legs as he gingerly presses the cloth against your reddened skin. You grip the countertop tighter as he opens the bottle of what you can only assume is ointment because after a moment his fingertips are smeared in a cool balm that offers such sweet relief you drop your head, trying to hold yourself together when your legs feel like they’re about to give out and you can feel Feyd-Rautha’s breath so close to the sensitive skin of your backside.
He seems to be applying the ointment to the worst of the welts, starting in silence and then adding, “You’re sensitive, but you have a decent pain tolerance. I like that.”
You huff a laugh. I bet you say that to all the girls, you almost tell him, and immediately think that that’s probably not true. If it weren’t for the fact that he’s tending to your wounds you’d assume that he’d never do anything like this. Something tells you that this small act of kindness isn’t to be taken lightly or for granted.
Once he seems satisfied with his work he gets back up, sneaking a glance of your face in the mirror.
Is he thinking about how much you’ve already changed since you’ve met? Since you’ve married? When you see your reflection you don’t see the same person you did a week ago. Of course he didn’t know you a week ago. He barely knows you now. Still, when your eyes meet in the mirror, he looks at you with something almost close to affection before he leaves the bathroom.
“Stay the night,” he says when you walk over to your abandoned clothes so you can gather them up, get dressed, and return to your chambers.
You look over at him.
“I’ll want to sample you again first thing in the morning,” he explains, “so it’s more convenient if you remain here.”
You huff, torn between incredulity and amusement. “Taking advantage of the situation while we still can, are we?” you ask.
“I doubt it’ll come again for another ten months,” he says, and then strides, still naked, for the door. He opens it, and a few words of battle-language later he shuts again. He sees your confused expression and explains, “Your slave was still waiting for you. I told her to go.” He tilts his head in the direction of his bed, and after a moment you follow. It appears that he doesn’t even want you to pull your undergarment back on.
As soon as you’re under the covers with him he tugs down your end of it to get one last look at your marked chest. And after he’s looked his fill, he reaches for a switch that turns off the lights and even as the two of you can’t quite see each other, you still find yourselves on your sides facing one another.
“I wake up earlier than you’re probably used to and I’m a light sleeper. Your slave assured me that you don’t snore,” he says.
“Not that I’m aware of,” you tell him.
“Once you stop bleeding I’m going to start having you train in my Halls,” he adds. “I was serious earlier.”
“But for the next few days I’m chained to this bed.”
“That could be arranged,” he says. “In any case you weren’t complaining when I was licking your cunt earlier.”
He won’t see your flush, but he must know that it’s there. “So… is it safe to assume that none of this is…” you try to find the right words, “typical? For a man, I mean.” And in quite possibly the biggest understatement you’ve ever made, “You’re not a normal man.”
You’ve adjusted enough to the dark to see his smirk. “I think you've known that since before we met, Y/N,” he says. And after a moment he lays his head, settling in and getting comfortable. He doesn’t say another word to you that night, just closes his eyes and within a couple of minutes his breath slows.
It’s hard to imagine being able to let your guard down enough with this man to sleep beside him, even if he falls asleep first. Like sleeping beside a wild animal.
Sleep does come to you, though, after long minutes watching him sleep, waiting for him to wake up and scare you, lunge for you, and it doesn’t happen.
You turn to your other side, facing away from him then, and the only signal you get that he’s not entirely asleep is that as you start to drift off yourself, he reaches one arm to pull you in closer to him.
Tag list: @wo-ming-bai @blazeflays @richardslady121
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#feyd x reader#feyd rautha#feyd rautha harkonnen#feyd-rautha harkonnen#feyd rautha x reader#feyd rautha smut#dune part 2#dune part two#feyd x you#dune fanfiction
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Propaganda
Josephine Baker (The Siren of the Tropics, ZouZou)— Josephine Baker was an American born actress, singer, and utter icon of the period, creating the 1920s banana skirt look. She was the first black woman to star in a major motion film. She fought in the French resistance in WWII, given a Legion of Honour, as well as refusing to perform in segregated theatres in the US. She was bisexual, a fighter, and overall an absolutely incredible woman as well as being extremely attractive.
Anne Baxter (The Ten Commandments, All About Eve)—her soft, gentle voice in "all about eve", those gentle eyes with something odd behind them, the way she flips from Sweet Innocent to Viper on a dime......there was something Built Different about anne baxter, man, and it makes her so good for playing people who are Built Wrong. also one of my favorite batmen villains (her joint episode w vincent price is a delight) and of course I'm obsessed with her columbo episode where she bosses around edith head and does fabulous movie star things for no good reason. and i would be REMISS if i didn't mention her slink—oh the slink—in the ten commandments...................pardon me i must go think of sinning again
This is round 4 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.
[additional propaganda submitted under the cut.]
Josephine Baker:
Black, American-born, French dancer and singer. Phenomenal sensation, took music-halls by storm. Famous in the silent film era.
Let's talk La Revue Negre, Shuffle Along. The iconique banana outfit? But also getting a Croix de Guerre and full military honors at burial in Paris due to working with the Resistance.
She exuded sex, was a beautiful dancer, vivacious, and her silliness and humor added to her attractiveness. She looked just as good in drag too.
So I know she was more famous for other stuff than movies and her movies weren’t Hollywood but my first exposure to her was in her films so I’ve always thought of her as a film actress first and foremost. Also she was the first black woman to star in a major motion picture so I think that warrants an entry
Iconic! Just look up anything about her life. She was a fascinating woman.
Anne Baxter:
The prettiest murderer in that film. Just so beautifully evil as Nefertari.
Anne Baxter was part of my Bisexual Awakening. My family has a tradition that every Palm Sunday we watch The ten commandments on TV together... And starting from a very young age, I essentially developed a crushes on Anne Baxter's Nefertiri & Yul Brynner's Ramses. Dude, the woman was HOT! They both were! My crush definitely wasn't helped by the fact that Anne Baxter's costumes were a bit on the sheer side. She had a way of capturing you with her eyes, and I never understood why Charlton heston's Moses didn't just have a threesome with Nefertiri and Ramses. LOL
Her Nefertiri in The Ten Commandments was FORMATIVE TO ME. If not the hottest old movie lady, then she definitely played the hottest old movie character. if that makes sense.
Look. Listen. I only *just* discovered her on a post from the Have You Seen This Romcom poll blog. Saw she had the same last name as me and went OOH hi hello. Went to her IMdB and saw she was born in Indiana like moi. I am now even more intrigued. Been eagerly telling my partner this, and he was like "maybe you guys are distantly related?" And after 2 hrs of going down the tumblr tag + her imdb photos, I'm In Deep(tm) and I can't stop looking at her like 😍 When I go to my grandma's house, bet your ass I'm gonna check my grandpa's genealogy and see if we're somehow related. Sorry that's not really propaganda I just got real excited, esp when I saw that the submission deadline was extended (bless your soul). Narrowing down the movies where she's hottest in was Hell tyvm. I've only just discovered her, she looks gorgeous to me in every movie still I see of her gdi lol.
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Detected
Fandom: Merge Mansion / Tim Rockford
Pairing: Tim Rockford x f!reader
Reader: Adult female. No other physical descriptors; no use of y/n.
Rating: T. Fluff.
Warnings: Mention of serial killer that targets women.
Summary: Nobody sees you the way Tim does.
A/N: I dunno, I just had a hankering to write for Tim and looked down my list of tropes thinking I might be able to scratch the itch and accomplish a fic for my Year of Tropes at the same time. Something hit me in the right places for a little piece of sweetness, so here we go, with SECRET IDENTITY.
This is really fluffy. Like stupid fluffy. Moreso than my regular stuff. Just let me have my little trope. This one didn't go through a lot of draft revisions, it was just a fun little thot that needed out.
“Why don’t you take the afternoon off, Sunshine? Get some rest. You’ve been here ten days straight.”
Tim’s the only detective in the unit who talks to you directly, certainly the only one that doesn’t just call you ‘hon’ or ‘sweetheart’ or ‘girl.’ You’re pretty sure he’s probably the only one in the department that knows your name, but he rarely uses it.
That isn’t unusual. You’ve always been the quiet one, the mouse, the wallflower. It’s your superpower, being able to go unnoticed. You’ve never been reprimanded, never bad-talked, never held up as a bad example.
But then, neither do you often find yourself praised or called in for opinion. Never once have you been asked to join anyone for happy hour or coffee.
So many times you’ve been standing in a meeting room and not once been addressed. So many times you’ve overheard something that perhaps you shouldn’t have just because you were below anyone’s notice.
It bothered you so much more when you were younger. Not the case anymore.
You’ve learned to love your quiet life, shuffling around the records room, carefully tagging and bagging, filling out the document cards, compiling files, taking meticulous photos of items for court cases and detective scrutiny. Nobody comes looking for you, so you get to take your time, a kind of professional meditation. At least once a week you notice a detail on a piece of evidence that you might make known to one of the team. Usually this gets you a thanks, but more often times a brush off that ends in the detective later gaining the credit for the discovery.
Tim is different. Observant. He actually listens when you bring him something of interest and asks for your opinion or your second eye. He still does that thing where he puts the pictures of people and evidence you provide up on the wall and connects it with string. He will stare at that board for hours, getting up every now and then to pace, then turning the chair around to straddle it backwards so he can lean over the back and look again, hoping to find the one connection that the string can’t touch.
And yet, even when he’s concentrating this hard, he’s fully aware of his surroundings.
So much so that he even notices you’ve slipped into the room to stand behind him--you, who goes mostly unnoticed when standing in full view of most people.
When you don’t answer him, he turns his chin back over his shoulder, his sharp profile coming into relief against the organized mess of the illuminated case wall.
He’s so very handsome. And it’s a shame he doesn’t seem to know. Or care.
Snapping free of your musings, you finally answer. “Yeah, it’s been a busy week. I’ve still got the Murray case to document. There’s a lot of entries.”
Turning fully to look at you now, he takes his time formulating a new response. “That case is closed. There’s no hurry. You work too hard. It’s Saturday.”
You shrug and smile. “I like my job. And you're one to talk.” Nodding to the evidence wall, you step more fully into the room. “Any movement on this? Sure I can’t help you? Anything I can pull from archives?”
This is a tough one. There’s a lot of speculation as to the mangled bodies in the pictures. A new one found last night, a week old. The probability is high that there’s one club downtown that’s producing them all and a definite suspect, but the record’s clean. There’s no grounds for warrants.
He gives you one more thoughtful glance before turning back to his work. “Not unless you have anything that correlates this last one to Club 88 or to Mike Cross. But no. Thanks. Get out of here, live your life, be free. I’m gonna go grab an interview out at the pier but then I’ll be here all night.”
He’s hungry. You can see that look in his eyes, he’s close, he just needs that one connecting piece of evidence and he’ll empty the coffee pots in the breakroom tonight looking for one.
“You’re hungry, Detective Rockford. At least let me call in some takeout for you before I go? Lau’s number 22 with chicken, right?”
He simply nods. “Thanks, Sunshine.”
“You got it, Detective.”
—-
Your pager goes off two hours later.
Special case. Could use your help. Pier 13.
You’ve been waiting for the call.
Upon arriving home from the department, you’d closed your blinds and turned off the lights, pulled on the dark pants and long fitted coat, tucked your hair up under the black hood and pulled it low. Gloves. Boots. Plain and unassuming in this fall weather.
You’re able to walk out the back door of your apartment building and take a path through the alley as the sun is setting without anyone giving you a second glance.
The only piece of your disguise you truly need is the vocal changer mask, but that stays tucked in your coat pocket until you arrive at the pier.
Once you can smell the water, you take a moment to hide your face, your voice, and your identity under the dark, nondescript mask–a blank slate of void where a face should be–before stepping out of the alleys and making your way to pier 13 where Tim Rockford stands looking out over the harbor at the lights starting to come on over the bridge.
“What can I do for you, Detective?” The voice that grates out of your mask is low, warped, almost sultry.
Tim, for all his awareness, misses your entrance. This is the strength of your powers. Snapping out of his reverie, he spins to find you only feet away, your long coat fluttering in the breeze.
And an awed smile spreads across his face.
Tim is the only one on the force that smiles when you show up as the Shadow. The rest of the cops tend to startle, recoil, not understanding how you simply seem to appear out of the air, unfold from the shadows, melt into the darkness itself.
“Thanks for coming, Shadow,” he says, his trenchcoat joining in the fluttering conversation of overwear. Pulling a few pictures out of his pocket, he holds them out and you take them.
A new mangled body. A hurried photo of a man with light skin and dark hair and blue eyes. A blown-up scan of license plate. You recognize them from his evidence board but say nothing, letting him make the request.
He explains the supposed serial killings, the patterns, the suspect, the license plate that isn’t his but was caught on surveillance near a couple of the dumping grounds.
“I’m pretty sure it’s him,” he concludes, poking at the photo of Mike Cross, “but I’m lacking something damming.”
“You mean you're 100% sure it's him. You're a thorough man; wouldn't just jump to conclusions. And you want me to go hunting.”
“I’d rather you just go take a listen. I don’t really want you to put yourself in danger.”
It’s a good thing he can’t see you smile. Trust Tim Rockford to be the one detective that worries about the safety of the city’s resident secret, pacifist vigilante.
“I’m touched by your concern, Detective. But I haven’t been caught yet. Even if danger catches a glimpse of me, I’m very good at hiding.”
“I know. But it’s only a matter of time before somebody really sees you.” He smiles a little sadly. “I wish you wouldn’t hide from me. But I know why you do.”
It should be surprising–it’s not like him to cross this line–but instead, his statement warms you. Tim has always been grateful for the Shadow’s help, respectful, believed in your ability. But he’s also come to treat the Shadow as a friend. There’s something that tugs at your heart, knowing this dedicated, handsome, intelligent man truly trusts you but also respects and admires your limitations.
If only he knew how much you wish you could tell him, show him, let him know how much you admire him too.
He only blinks when you seem to melt into thin air, becoming one with the lengthening shadows.
_____
Club 88. The back alley. A black car belonging to Mike Cross. Nobody here to notice you but the rats as you duck around the back and inspect the bumper, find a magnetized plate cover hidden underneath that matches the photo in your pocket.
There’s the connection. Now for something that threads the needle.
_____
Maskless and hatless, you simply take up a serving tray and follow Mike Cross and a young pretty thing through the swinging “employees only” door and down a back corridor of the dark, thumping night club. Making yourself busy with empty bottles on the tray, you watch him pay a man and step into a private room with the girl. The man goes to find something else to do, nearly knocking your shoulder as he passes, as if you’re simply a tower of inventory boxes or a rogue tray of dirty dishes…or just some random hostess he doesn’t have time for.
Easy.
You’re able to enter the dimmed room under the guise of bringing in bottle service. The couple doesn’t even notice you while they make out on the couch in the VIP lounge. You simply dip your hand into the pocket of the jacket he’s left on a chair and lift his wallet.
Might as well take the gun that’s there too. Just in case.
Time to get moving while he’s distracted.
_____
Using the address on the ID in his wallet, you make your way across town.
It’s easy enough to slip past the doorman. Unfortunately though, Mike’s apartment building has security cameras on every floor. This calls for a little distraction. Easy enough. All you need is the pad of paper and pen you carry in your pocket.
Knock on door 312. Explain you’re responding to a noise complaint in apartment 313. There is no apartment 313? That’s odd. Maybe it was apartment 311?
When the occupants of 311 and 312 speculate over the possibilities–which apartment was the loud one? Who called in the complaint? They bet it was 211 down there, what a bitch….
It’s just enough time for you to use your jiggler key to work open the lock for Mike’s apartment and slip inside. Not only have they seemed to forgotten about you, but if anyone ever plays back the security tapes, their eyes will just slide right over you and concentrate on the gossiping neighbors in the hall.
Mike’s apartment is clean and sparse. By the looks of the set up of the living room, he likes to sit in the center of the couch, put his feet up on the coffee table while he drinks his beer (water ring stains on the veneer top) and watches tv. Not much on the walls. Books on the bookshelf, but no knicknacks.
You don’t know what you’re looking for yet, but you’ll know it when you find it.
There are a few places you start. The drawers in the kitchen. The freezer. The bedside table. Shelves in the closet. Medicine cabinet. Somewhere you'd stash something unassuming but precious but that you don't want anyone else to come across and ask questions.
But it’s as you pass back out through the bedroom, and lightly push the door open a bit wider that you hear a clinking and tapping on the other side.
There, hanging off a hook on the back of the bedroom door, is a silver chain.
With five women’s rings on it.
Yahtzee.
You snap a few photos with your phone before moving through the apartment again, looking for anything else, just in case your first instincts were wrong.
But your instincts are very rarely wrong.
Criminals love trophies. Little keepsakes of their thrills. Look for a collection of something that seems out of place and you’ve probably found your clue.
You’re just about to call it good and head out when you hear a key turning in the lock.
No need to panic, you’ve got this.
As Mike enters and kicks off his shoes before making his way to the bathroom, all you have to do is stand silently beside the far side of the bookshelf.
He doesn’t even turn on the light. Even easier.
Once the bathroom door closes, you’re able to silently slip out.
“It’s only a matter of time before somebody really sees you.”
Doubtful, Tim. But I wish I could tell you how sweet your concern is.
____
True to form, Tim’s is one of the only lights burning at the office when you slide through the department well after midnight.
It’s not often that you show up here as the Shadow, but you make sure it’s only at night when most of the lights are out. Even if you’re seen engaging with one of them, the detectives all know to look the other way and not to ask questions when someone on the force has requested your services.
They see nothing, and say less.
When you get to the back offices, you have to stop for a moment in the shadows and take in the scene.
Tim’s here in the dim room, standing at a desk full of evidence bags. The one with the knife in it lays on a lightbox, the glow of which reaches up to caress his face, dragging at his cheeks and the bags under his eyes, his brow and bottom lip succumbing to the pull of contemplation.
You have to wonder if the detective has any joys outside of his work, if he reads or paints, if he’s into woodworking or collecting memorabilia. You often find yourself wishing you had the means to learn more about him and find yourself watching him from across the office as if you could read it in the stretch of his aching neck, in the hunch of his gun-holstered shoulders.
But you’ve grown used to your quiet life. You wouldn’t know what to do with yourself if someone else actually paid you enough attention to let you into their life–
“What have you got for me?” he asks, and you flinch. He hadn’t even turned around.
“Plenty," you rasp through the voice modulator. "How did you know I was here?”
“I always notice you,” he says. “And I could ask you the same thing.”
“Where else would you be?”
“I have a home.”
“Do you ever go there?”
He laughs and finally turns. “Yeah, not lately.”
Emerging from the darkness, you hand him a few photos you ran off from your phone at home, knowing he'd appreciate the analog. There's the plate cover. The ID. The chain of rings. You also hand over the gun you pinched. “Just in case you need to run a match on any casings.”
It’s here that Tim’s look grows sour. “You took this off him?” Then he tilts his head, scanning the photos. “This one…taken inside his house?”
“Yes. Most likely a collection of his trophies–”
“You went into his house??”
His intensity stops you. Something’s….wrong. “It was necessary. I wasn’t seen.”
“I told you, nothing dangerous. What if he’d come home?”
“He did.” This gains an unprecedented look of alarm from the otherwise calm and calculated man. “I told you, Detective, I wasn’t seen. I never am. That’s what I do.”
“That’s not the point, Sunshine. He murders women and dumps their bodies. This is different from the drug smugglers and counterfeit runners you usually surveil…”
He stops, registering what he just said only a couple of seconds after you do, a calm sigh of regret washing over him before being replaced by the bloom of concern.
You could choose to ignore it.
But it's useless. Tim would never let an assumption take hold as truth unless he had absolute proof. He’s the best. The best of the best and doesn’t even know it. So long you’ve wished to tell him, to make him see what you see in him, but it would mean opening yourself, becoming visible, being seen.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. This is your superpower, this anonymity, this blurring at the edges, this void of connection…
And you should back away when he approaches.
But you don't want to.
Nor do you dodge as he slowly reaches up to remove your mask. Your hood. Fits his palm to your jaw and runs the length of a cheekbone with his thumb. “It doesn’t work on everyone, Sunshine. Not if they really want to see you.”
As his warm, weary brown eyes find yours, two thick, generous tears spill down your cheeks, two surprising hot spikes of your heart right there on your face. It’s like being thrust underwater without the chance to take a breath, the panic of suddenly being the center of someone’s attention, and you gasp for air only to release a sob, slapping both hands to your face in embarrassment.
Tim doesn’t pry your hands away, he merely runs a knuckle over one as if to say, hey, you’re still hiding.
And you realize that you are.
When you finally don’t have to be.
When you lower your guard, he’s waiting there patiently to welcome you back.
“You okay?” he asks, handing you a napkin for your tears.
Nodding, you take it and use it quietly before swallowing, trying to steady a voice out in the open. “What now?”
He looks pointedly over at his desk and gestures for you to head over there. “I thought maybe we’d start with dinner. I figured you'd come by.”
There are two Chinese takeout boxes on the blotter, both bearing a code in black ink.
22C. His standard.
Lucky13. Your favorite. With the sauces on the side, just like you like it.
Speechless, you look at him in awe. You do see me.
And he tucks his hands in his pockets, softening back at you with a look that can only be described as Yeah.
_____
In the following days you’re able to hunt down photos of the killer’s victims that clearly display their hands and the rings that you found in his apartment.
Undercover targets are planted in the club to entice Mike Cross, and sure enough, he takes one to the back room, pays for privacy, extra for a later cleanup, but gets caught with his fingers around her throat as a whole squad breaks down the door to take him into custody.
There’s no doubt he will never see the outside of a prison again.
Club 88 is shut down and a long investigation into its ownership and practices begin. The Shadow is called in by the investigating team for your fly-on-the-wall services and at first you’re afraid that perhaps, now that you’ve been seen, that the shine of your powers has dimmed or–to be more precise–a newfound confidence makes you even brighter than before.
On the contrary, you’ve never felt more powerful or more in control of your abilities.
Perhaps because the one person who can detect your sunshine also pours pride into your shadow.
Or maybe it’s the regular diet of Lucky Number 13 and a new morning view these days. Who’s to say?
____
MASTERLIST
CHARACTER MASTERLIST
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