#look I'm mad at capitalism

[frogeyedape]

Uh...individual ownership is the basis of capitalism...

I think we're perhaps confusing UltraMegaCorpSuperMonopolySuperPAC capitalism, a terrible and destructive offshoot of capitalism, with all forms of capitalism

This is as opposed to all property held in trust by the government/community and allocated on a needs basis

There's no pure capitalism or pure socialism or pure communism that works ideally, cuz humans gonna human. There are pros to capitalism (I like having personal property. So do many others) and massive cons when it's left unchecked (hello wealth concentration so that 1% of Americans have more wealth than...(hold on while I google it) the entire American middle class. Estimates I'm seeing:

Bottom 20% (low income) Americans hold 3% of American wealth while the middle 60% hold 26% and the top 1% hold 26.5% usatoday 2023)

Bottom 50% hold 2.6%, 50-90% hold 30.7%, 90-99% hold 36.3%, 99-99.9% hold 16.6%, top 0.1% hold 14% (bankrate.com 2024)

Note that wealth =/= income. Wealth is owning assets--real property (real estate, land, housing), stock market investments, even your health/life...technically this is all inside parentheses so let's close that shall we)

Anywho, call the problem by the right name. It's economic inequality (both wealth inequality and income inequality) that's the biggest issue.

I fucking hate this "capitalism is when you make money, the more money you make, the more capitalism it is" mindset people have gotten. No, an artist selling their own work is not them engaging in capitalism, it's literally a worker owning their own means of production.

Remember capitalism is someone profiting off of someone else's labor though owning capital. It is not simply the act of profiting at all.

[that-spider-witch]

You can enjoy a videogame's gameplay, worldbuilding, stories and characters while also acknowledging that the company making it is shady as fuck and maybe, just maybe, you should think twice before giving them your money.

Also gacha games will always be predatory no matter how good of a game they might be otherwise and spending money on them is never a good thing to do.

[wyverwithy]

i'm so pissed i'm going to watch wild kratts to be less pissed :)

[unohanadaydreams]

Does Mayuri Kurotsuchi know that I would lovingly stare at him as he dissected me and be so brave about it and only try to grasp at him a couple times at most? I need him to know. He has to know I am insane for him.

[bisexualpackrat]

.

[etakeh]

I bitch about this so much. Especially with shows they rebooted.

just remembered shows used to have 20-25 eps per season

[disappearedsock]

Hrn

[yanderefarm]

I want to spread a rumor about Emil cheating, make sure nobody knows it was me, then act all mad at him and punish him for it

Also ygs better square up Cherros anon and Jerry anon

-🐕‍🦺

ive been craving to hurt emil. rofan villain reader my beloved, a cute husband to bully and all his money 🥰

cw;; abuse, cheating, non-con (implied), gaslighting, angst

the nobles always talk, talk, talk. it's not odd for them to spread meaningless gossip. it's odd when unsubstantiated gossip makes it into the most popular newspaper in the capital and becomes the headline on everyone's lips. that took your whole allowance at the information guild but it was worth it to see your husband's face now.

the pictures were the best touch, you really should thank the guild master later. undeniable evidence of emil being intimate with one of his maids was sitting in front of him on the desk. his advisor was cautiously scolding him for ruining his reputation that he had just started to build up. the image of loving husband dashed in an instant. he started to raise his voice his hand pounding on the table in anger. that was your cue.

you threw the door of the office open with force.

"emil! are you going to explain yourself? why are all my maids talking about you ch-"

your eyes caught the images, you hadn't actually seen them yet. god they were good, they made you actually feel a bit sick to see. perfect.

".... what is that?"

you watch his face drop as all his anger melts into panic. poor bastard tries to cover up the images.

"this doesn't concern you."

"... you're fucking one of your maids?"

the accusation burns his heart and he feels like he's going to be sick. he tries to cover the images more.

"this doesn't-" thwack!

you slap him across the face as hard as you can, your wedding ring leaving an imprint on his cheek.

"everyone get out. i need to speak to my husband privately."

his servants and advisors scurried out of there, afraid of the situation about to play out, only your right hand maid stayed. she closed the behind the last person to leave, locking it for you. you let out a heavy sigh as you leaned against his desk, your hand rubbing your temples. emil didn't look up, his eyes wide but you could see there was fear in them even with his head hung.

you picked up one of the pictures, one where the maid was clearly caught in the middle of having sex with him. you'd been out of the capital a few weeks ago for an event in your home kingdom. really it was just an excuse to let the guild master do what he needed. he really exceeded your expectations. it was hard not to smile.

"i don't remember doing that, please believe me."

"oh?" you set the picture down and shot him a glare. "just because you don't remember fucking her i should forgive you? what about kissing her? what about pushing her against the window behind you?"

"i-"

he watched helplessly as you picked up one of the pictures, your hand shaking. oh, when you got your hands on the royal treasury you were going to drown the guild master in gold. you had told him about emil's hatred for letting you leave the palace grounds, how emil wouldn't even take you to the cafe you so desperately wanted to go to. and here was a picture of him in the same cafe with the maid.

"what is this?"

"i-i don't know."

you forced your face to scrunch up in anger despite how excited you were. you were going to enjoy this too much. you turned to your maid who was still standing by the door.

"do you have my riding crop?"

"yes, your highness." she presented it to you and you handed her the picture of him at the cafe in exchange.

"what would you do if you were in my position?"

"i would ask for a divorce, your highness."

"no-"

emil's poor voice cracked but all he got was another glare.

"then I suppose I'm being merciful, right?"

"you are far too kind to that cheating filth, your highness."

you walked over to stand beside emil who already looked so broken and frightened. you ran your riding crop up his cheek.

"take your shirt off. unless you would rather the divorce?"

emil's body slipped to the ground as his knees gave out underneath him. tears started to stream from his eyes like the dam had finally broken.

"please, dont leave me, please, please."

you nudged him with the riding crop.

"shirt. off."

his hands were shaking as he started to unbutton his shirt.

[eustasskidagenda]

Okay, this post is not based on a request. I kept thinking about it for hours and finally decided to write it down: how the OP characters would text their s/o. So here are some texting headcanons for some of my favorite characters: Eustass Kid, Zoro, Sanji, Law, Sabo. I'll probably write a part 2 with my other beloved characters: Luffy, Marco, Killer, and Robin. :D

☆Texting HCs for Kid, Law, Sanji, Zoro & Sabo

CW : g/n reader, MDNI, Kid is cursing, fluff, funny, partly nsfw, mention of alcohol for Zoro 

WC : 2k

Kid

Your name/photo in his contacts: mine. With a photo of your ass, obviously. And when he's mad at you, he renames you mid(ge).

Such a brat.

His wallpaper: a cool photo of his motorbike (I'm sorry but Kid is that kind of man in love with his own bike/car. But it's okay, he's still my favorite.) Or, a pic of your ass.

What kind of pictures are in his gallery: your ass, random photos of your face when he’s teasing you, his bike, and some punk stuff (music, makeup, outfit etc.)

His fav emoji : none.

He likes to send really, really shorts messages. Like : 

"Hi" "u know" "i have an idea" "So listen:"

Goddam Kid, just write the WHOLE sentence in one message.

He's sending you random pictures of his torso, just to flex with his big tiddies.

And you have to respond with a heart emoji and praise him each time.

If you want, he's more than willing to send dick pick too. 

Again, you have to praise him. Even if the pictures are absolutely non-aesthetic. He's blessing you with his cock after all. 

"Babe, you don't know how to take beautiful pics of your dick." "WTF SHUT UP???????? It's MY dick???!!! OF COURSE IT'S BEAUTIFUL??!!!" 

Yeah, Kid is clearly using extra punctuation. 

Oh, sure, each morning, you receive a mirror selfie of his outfit of the day. Such a punk fashion icon. "Rate my outfit on a scale of amazing to amazing" 

He doesn't use emojis because they sound too soft and stupid. "em0teS aRe f0r s0fT b0ys Y/N"

If you complain about his messages looking cold, he might use random emotes to annoy you like "UgH iF U wAnt 🦬" (with that stupid dumb sponge bob meme)

Whenever he calls you, it seems like he's yelling through the phone. 

He likes using caps lock like "HEY Y/N, WANNA FUCK TONIGHT??????" 

He's sending you random punk/rock music. And you have to listen and react to every single music, otherwise he's so pissed off. He is sharing his world with you, the less you can do is interact with him. 

He also loves sending some pics of what he's working on, because Kid likes to repare/custom some cars or motorbike. 

And last thing, I like the idea of Kid Pirates being a punk music band, so sure, Kid loves to send you some videos of him playing guitar. "My fingers are skilled in three things : music, crafting and fingering you all the fucking day long"

His phone is so damaged because he throws it every time he gets angry (like every two minutes).

Law

Your name/photo in his contacts: y/n-ya. With a cursed picture of you. Just to tease you with it. 

His wallpaper: nothing, just the random by default home screen. In his view, wallpapers are useless and pointless.

What kind of pictures are in his gallery: random pictures you took of him, emo memes, and boring stuff about medicine or basic hygiene rules for Luffy. And a guide to "how to stop screaming and how to control your anger: a guide for children" for Kid. 

His favorite emoji: 🖕🏻

Whenever you annoy him with a stupid joke or a prank you saw on TikTok, his immediate reaction is to block you. He's so annoyed, please, leave him alone. He is immediately aware that it is a prank. Luffy always does the same to him before you do.

He's never using capital, it's for the emo aesthetic, like 'I hate bread'. Nope. But ✨"i hate bread."✨, yeah, much better

And yes, he uses "." everytime, it's for the dark and tired emo aesthetic. 

He always leaves a group conversation as soon as you include him. Please, he's so pissed off by those kinds of things. 

He's able to leave your message seen for days. Just because he was busy and forgot about what you said. If you need an answer, sure, try to call him. He always keeps his phone in silent mode. 

He likes to send you cool articles that he reads. Especially about medicine, tattoos or nerd stuff like movies, books, games etc.

"wanna go to a date tattoo with me tomorrow?" 

That kind of question is clearly his love language

He enjoys teasing you with random photos of his tattooed fingers or chest. "I bet you miss these fingers." And yeah, he's clearing curling his fingers on the pic like he would do when they are inside you. He's really good at teasing you with photos. 

Kid and Luffy steal his phone whenever he's with them. So be ready to receive a lot of ugly pictures of Law (taken by the chaotic duo), middle fingers from Kid, and blurry meat pictures from Luffy. 

Poor Law deserves a break.

Sanji 

Your name/photos in his contacts : 💗💘🛐Mon Amour (my love)🛐💘💗 With the most beautiful picture of you. 

His wallpaper : a cute couple photo.

What kind of pictures are in his gallery : a lot of cooking videos or photos, you, aesthetic pic of the sky and a private album with some hot nudes that you sent to him.

His favorites emojis : 💘💗💖🛐💍🧎🌺🌸🌹🫦🥰😘🧑🏻‍🍳🍽🍷🥘 (yeah, Sanji LOVES emojis)

He's always texting you back. If he can't reply within a second, he won't open the text. Sanji, leaving his beautiful s/o with that awful "seen"? Never. 

All the mornings "good morning sweetheart 💘" and all the evenings "sleep well sweetheart, dream about me 💖"

He wants to take a cute and aesthetic pic of the both of you all the days. 

He bombards you with pictures of his cooking. It's cute, but also annoying because he can't help but send extra long texts. He describes every single action he did, along with recipes and tips. 

He enjoys seeing your outfit of the day. He can attempt to match his clothes to yours. 

Random "I love you 💖" and "if no one told you you were pretty today : you're the prettiest 🥰" 

He enjoys sending you cooking videos. "We should eat this tonight. What do you think? 🧑🏻‍🍳"

He's pretty good at sexting. He knows how to take aesthetic photo of his hands, back, or mouth. Not just an ugly dick pick (Kid, Zoro, I'm looking at you). And he also likes to leave you some message like.

I would sit you down on this table if you were with me right now. You know, the one in your kitchen where he had dinner with your parents yesterday? I would gently kiss your neck, fondle your chest, and slowly kneel between your legs until you shout my name. You would pull on my hair, begging me to keep going until you cum repeatedly on my face.  👅 "

And if you send him a nude, well, he's going to die from a nosebleed.

Rest in peace, Sanji. 

Zoro

Your name/photos in his contacts : "y/n". You pick a picture for him because Zoro and phones are not compatible.

His wallpaper : a cool katana

What kind of pictures in his gallery : gym selfies, katanas and alcohol (all with ugly quality)

His fav emojis : 👍🏻 and 😴 Like:

"hey Zoro, you're alright" 👍🏻

"Zoro, wanna hang out?" 😴

"Babe, what are you doing?" 😴

"… am i annoying you?" 👍🏻

He can responds to absolutely anything with those two emojis. 

Zero is so oblivious, so let's be honest: he is not good at using phones. Almost every day, he forgets his phone at home. And even if he didn't forget about it, it's probably on silent mode or just off.

He doesn’t know how to use the keyboard, so prepare yourself for coded-message like "o!. @= sp⛑t t🧹day???/!df🆎e !!"He can't even use the excuse "my cat walked on my keyboard", he just sucks with technology.

Your messages are often "seen ✔️" and that's all. Not because he wants to be mean, just... he didn't understand the concept of answering every text. He takes all of your messages as random information. Like "Hey, I'd love to see you tonight!". Well. OK. Message understood. That's all.

The only application he has on his phone is Google Maps. Even with it, he still gets lost. "Turn left." Without a doubt, he turns right. 

Once, he tried to please you with a dick pic. But the photo was just terrible: bad luminosity, an ugly close-up of his cock, blurred as fuck, and you can see the dirty tissue behind him.

He doesn't answer when you call him because he's either asleep or at the gym (or drunk).

Once, he also tried to send you a voice message, but it was just the sound of the wind. He forgot to talk closer to the microphone.

Sabo 

Your name/photos in his contacts : "my revolutionary 🎩💛". With a beautiful pic of your smiling face. 

His wallpaper : a symbol of revolution. 

What kind of pictures in his gallery : petition screenshots, his brothers, you, anti-capitalist memes and a private album with some hot pic of you (naughty Sabo)

His fav emojis : 🔥✨🖕🏻💛✊🏻😡😏😎🤩👉🏻👌🏻🫵🏻

Sabo is... complicate. Sometimes, he doesn't answer for WEEKS. And sometimes he's extra chatty. And when he's chatty well...

Sabo is always spamming you with petition links. "Save the dolphins", "save the monkeys", "fuck capitalism", "for the resignation of *insert random politician name*" 

"Hey sweetheart, manifestation tomorrow. See you there!! 🫵🏻" 

When it's not petitions, it's probably videos or articles. Sabo is a pure revolutionary. Be prepared to receive lengthy texts when he wants to fight for a cause. It's cute, honestly. He's really involved and passionate. 

"You, me, on a trip tomorrow?! 😏"

Sabo has a knack for surprising you with trips, so prepare yourself. This man craves adventure and surprises. He wants you to join his crazy journey. 

Sometimes, he's using proper grammar and punctuation, sometimes he's using a lot of !!!!!!!!??????? And caps lock. Especially when he's furious about something.  He makes a lot of typo errors because he's always in a rush while typing.

Let's fught  *figrt *fijkt *FUCK *LET'S FIGHT (and fuck)

He enjoys taking pictures of you unexpectedly because it makes you seem more natural. 

"So… sweetheart… we have a new roommate" with a cute pic of a dog/frog/duck/snail/whatever. Sabo has a kind heart. If he sees a wounded or abandoned animal, he feels obliged to adopt it.

And regarding spicy texts… 

Sabo is a kinky boy. So sure, he's thirsty when it comes to sexting/nudes. As a revolutionary, he is also very careful. He always asks you first before sending you nude or spicy texts. If you're willing, then prepare yourself.

A bunch of nudes. Since he's good with them, he won't display his dick in a weird and unattractive angle to you. He enjoys showing you his hands when he's wearing his gloves. Or a mirror photo of his back.

"I know you will scratch it when I'll fuck you tonight 😏"

You're not forced to send him nude or spicy texts back. He respects your boundaries without exception. And if you send him a photo anyway, he's also really nice. Always a comment like "your ass is soooooo good with this angle. I can't believe I'm that lucky 🥵" and if he wants to save a photo for his collection, he's always asking if it's okay with you.

"Sweetie, i have a new toy for you… 💛"

We all know what he's talking about. Naughty Sabo.

[inthefoxholes]

veilguard, i hated it.

So i finally finished veilguard, and guys, what. a. shitshow.

So apart from the fact that it feels like a half-finished game (which it probably is), I mostly hated it on two accounts: 1) the overall lore implications (we knew this from this reddit q&a, but I'm still angry, and I won't stop talking about it) BOTH in regards to previous games and this one and 2) how this was not at all a roleplaying game. (sorry, english is not my first language and I'm tired and enraged)

Let's look a little closer, shall we.

One: The Lore Implications. This pisses me off in two ways:

First, the amateurish attempt at a "clean slate". This is just so insulting. If they wanted to make a game without any of that icky baggage, then the should have chosen a new ip for this. I get that it's complicated after three games with a lot of moving parts, I get that the decision to move away from southern thedas was an attempt to curtail a lot of this, but COME ON. Walls of nonsensical (seriously, they read ai created) text from the inquisitor, that mainly tell you that everything you fought for, all the people, all the places, is gone? And not for effect, not for the story, entirely offscreen and nonsensical, just so the writers don't have to care for this anymore? This does NOT get me invested into the story. No mention of who your Divine is; no mention of who sits on the orleasian throne - and it should matter, shouldn't it, whether or not your EXILED the grey wardens, whether or not you have an elf with a SPY NETWORK close to the orleasian throne, whether or not you DISBANDED the inquisition. All of that does influence what happens on the world state, or at least it should. (And if you want to ignore it, why not do in a way that's less obvious, less bad, why not have your protagonist be someone with no ties to the inquisition, who genuinely does not know whats going on in the south? Why have a world state when you don't want anything to do with it?)

Second, and that's even worse: you cannot take a fully established world, and then alter it to your weird specifications. THE FUCK you mean, there are no slaves in Minrathous, the goddamn slave capital of the world?? Why THE HELL is there a whole questline where we try to find disappeared people, snatched from the street for the ritual, when it should be perfectly possible to buy a few batches of slaves and have them express delivered to your ritual site. (So we can show up and fuck up your slave operation.) But no - I get shamed when I don't save Minrathous?? Well, fuck you, Fenris sends his regards, I hope you all burn.

To this ties the overall simplificaton of the world: Nobody is really bad, just the few super bad guys, but they are so evil as to have no real motiviation, they are basically Thanos or otherwise racist cartoons (totally believable that the Qunari, or a sect thereof, would be on board with mad sorcery). They rest, they are good guys! The pirates are very mindful of cultural heriatages! The crows are just your friendly neighborhood assassins (I remember the stories Zevran told slightly differently), and, as assassins, they naturally wear uniforms, so you see them coming (as do the "secret" "underground" "rebels" from Tevinter). I'm not saying that everyone should be evil, but the fact that whole organisations are presented to us as benefical is so insulting, ESPECIALLY when it was always a point of pride for the Dragon Age franchise that it was morally complicated. There is slavery and poverty and darkspawn. NOPE, you can stand knee deep in blight, not a problem anymore. (if only Carver had known) There is racism against elfs. (well, as the elfs seem to be respnsible for EVERY problem thedas faces, from the veil to the darkspawn, maybe that was precient? - also, always nice to have everything tied in such a neat bow, everything tied to one ONE causality, that makes things really believable and realistic) The Templars are fascists, sure, but abominations are a problem that does not get solved easily. NOPE, not anymore! When before, even a spirit of JUSTICE got corrupted in this world (therby making the valiant and sublte point that abstract concepts rarely hold up well when coming in contact with messy reality), now you can be possessed by a demon of SPITE and HE DOES NOT DO ONE SPITEFUL THING AT ALL. Nice, if only the mages knew that, you just have to accecpt feelings or whatever and then everything's well. SO NEAT!

This brings me to point number two: Why do we play this game? The complex and previously established word is gone; what's left are cartoons thereof. And then, there's not even a hint of role-playing left. Why can't I be mean to Harding?? I loved her in Inquisition, now her overly-girly manner grates on my nerves and I want to be mean to her. I can't, i have to be everyone's friend. In the end, I cannot decide anything, except the slight configuration of the final companion armour (why would I care, I don't know these people, I could not ask them a single question), and some slight cosmetic change regarding Solas - there is not even talk about tearing down the Veil. We've come full circle back to Mass Effect 3 and the groundbreaking decision we get to make is what colour the magic space beam is gonna have. Except, Mass Effect 3 was still a much better game, because you knew your crew - in this game, I have acutally no idea why Rook should lead anybody, why anybody would follow them, and why the literal fate of the world should be in the hands of this bunch of (after 100 hours of gameplay) near strangers. There ARE narrative work-arounds for this kind of shit; the writers just didn't care enough.

There are a hundred more small things I could say about this, about the story (Solas' prison was made of regret and he wanted to put Elgarnan there?? Who feels very good about everything he does?? Is he stupid? And then everyone is so impressed about Rook getting out to quickly, but seriously, what the fuck did Rook have to feel regretful about? They did not get to make a single decision. They did not order anyone to sacrifice themselves; they did not use people, or cities, as pawns in a war or whatever, BECAUSE THIS GAME HAS THE EMOTIONAL DEPTH OF A SMALLISH PUDDLE) and the in-game approach to the player (how often do i have to be told that i need to take care of my companions business?? This got so repetitive and made them seem like imcompetent children. Why wasn't there a better way to make me care, or better yet, trust the player to want to play this game), but I stop now. Fuck Bioware and EA.

[m00nkissedlover]

・｡Cat's First Snow ❄️

You've ordered: cookies and cream ice cream! enjoy!

"Twenty-four to twenty-five, bae. Just stay with me." (partly inspired by "24 to 25" by Stray Kids)

animagus! Regulus Black x reader | word count: 1,492 words

Summary: it snows at hogwarts! but, guess who hates the cold? ❄️ (silly little drabble)

Warnings: a bit of cursing (lighthearted)! not really warnings, but: reader's favorite season is winter, regulus takes the animagus form of a cat.

Note: i swear, i was giggling and kicking my feet writing this 🤭 yes, i'm reusing marauders/ skittles characters. again, i'm still getting caught up on marauders/ harry potter stuff in general. this fic is based on this post i made.

The courtyard grounds of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were blanketed in a pillowy white layer of snow. Excitement emanated through the corridors and hallways of the school as students and faculty alike talked of taking pleasure in the wondrous winter display. Basically, everyone was ready for classes to end so they could go out and play in the snow.

Well...not everyone.

You see, your boyfriend, Regulus Black: he hated the cold. Hated with a capital H. Ever since he was a child, the Slytherin was never fond of the chilly weather of fall and winter, always wrapped to the nines in layers of sweaters and jackets. Not even a single wisp of cold air could touch him without him kicking up a fuss.

Obviously, this was a problem since you lived for the cold weather of winter. Getting to splurge on cute, fluffy sweaters, tins of flavored hot chocolate mix, and jars of various teas made your heart pound with joy. And of course, playing in the snow was just as fun.

"Boys versus girls snowball fight in ten minutes!" Evan yelled, throwing his scarf around his neck as he, Barty, and James made a mad dash down the hallway.

"Losers have to shove snow down their shirts!" Sirius chimed in, he and Remus following after the others.

"They're so immature." Pandora grumbled, rolling her eyes as she watched her brother run down the hallway like an idiot.

"I know right....But, we're winning the fight, right?" Marlene asked, nudging Dorcas in her side.

"Oh definitely." Dorcas responded, Lily giving them a thumbs up before looking around.

"Have any of you seen Y/n? I could've sworn they were just with us." Lily asked, the girls looking around in confusion.

Just where were you?

"Reg, please? It's not even that bad, I swear!" Oh, there you were, currently trying to persuade Regulus to come outside with you guys.

You knew it was a futile effort. He'd never agree.

"I don't care, I said I'm not coming." the stubborn Slytherin refused, tucking himself deeper into the blankets he had piled around him.

"You're being ridiculous."

"And what's so ridiculous about not wanting to freeze to death?" he quipped in a rather dramatic tone that made you bite back a laugh.

"Fine, I'll just go out myself. And have fun with the others..." you said, glancing over at Regulus to see if your words had affected him.

"Alright, have fun."

You frowned, getting up and buttoning up your jacket. "But even though I'll be with them, I'll still be a little...lonely. If only my boyfriend would come and keep me company...." Nothing.

"Y/n, I know what you're doing." he said, not even looking up from his book.

"Fuck you, Regulus Black." you groaned.

"Maybe after your snow day." he smiled to himself, knowing he got under your skin as he heard the door slam shut.

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁. ݁₊

"Look at him, all warm and cozy, while we're all freezing our asses off." Evan huffed. You were all peering in through the window of the common room, watching a familiar black cat enjoying the comfort of the fireplace.

"You thinking what I'm thinking?" barty whispered to you, a sly grin on his pierced lips.

"Absolutely." you nodded, giving him the same grin as the two of you slipped away from the group. Yoi waited in the corridor, peeking through one of the windows.

Barty quietly stepped into the room, the black cat now stretching out on the couch. The Crouch boy carefully tiptoed over to the couch, leaning over it and giving regulus a smile. "Hey Reg...don't hate me too much after this."

The cat equivalent of a scream was heard as Barty swiftly scooped up the poor feline, shoving him into his coat. You had to try your best not to burst into a fit of laughter, your hand slapped over your mouth and body shaking. You watched as Regulus hissed and reached out with clawed paws, trying to scratch at Barty, who was scrambling out the door and over to you.

"Damn, he put up a fight." Barty huffed, handing you the obviously unhappy cat.

"Thanks, Crouchy!" you smiled, now shoving Regulus into your coat. He let out a meow of protest as you ran down the hall and out the large double doors.

You could feel Regulus jerk in your arms as the cold air washed over his fur. You pulled him out of your coat, playfully swinging him in your arms. then he saw it: the pile of snow you were about to fling him into.

"3...2...1!" you yelled, tossing him into the pillowy white snow. A startled "mrow!" left the black cat's throat as he landed into it with a soft thud. He poked his head out, the snow on his head practically melting with how seething he was.

"Oh come on, Reg. Have some fun! Look-? Wait, where's Sirius?" Your question was answered as you saw Padfoot running over to the group and slamming into the pile of snow.

Laughter filled the air as Padfoot popped his head out and shook out his snow covered fur that resulted in Regulus getting covered in snow once again. Padfoot playfully nudged the angry cat, licking over his fur. You knelt down and gently scooped Regulus back up into your coat, planting a soft kiss onto his head, right between his ears. the look on his face said "I hate you" but in a "You're lucky I love you" way.

After hours of snowball fights, snow angels, and building snowmen, the sun was finally beginning to set on your wintertime activities. Yoi all made your way back inside, Regulus snuggly tucked into your coat and poking his head through your scarf. When you two arrived at his dorm, he hopped out of your arms and scurried into his closet. A few moments later, regulus walked out, wrapped in a blanket and shivering rather dramatically.

"Don't ever take me out in the cold again." he said through chittering teeth.

"But, wasn't that fun? At least you were warmer in your cat form, no?" you teased, walking over to him and cupping his face in your hands.

"Cold!" he yelped, jumping back from the frosty touch of your fingers. A smirk formed on your face as you looked at your hands, then back at your boyfriend.

"Y/n, don't-" you stepped closer to him, his eyes darting around the room.

"Y/n- AH!" you immediately charged at him, chasing him around the room as he desperately tried to avoid your freezing cold hands.

"Get over here!" you giggled, cornering him against his bed. you moved to straddle him, your thighs on either side of his waist.

"Wait, Y/n, please!" the poor boy pleaded, trying not to laugh at the determined look in your eyes.

"I can't hear you!" you teased, quickly slipping your hands underneath the blanket and pressing them to his sides.

"GAH!" The yelp that left his throat had you laughing till your throat was sore, Regulus grabbing your wrists to get you off of him.

"Ah! Please, have mercy!" Regulus mumbled weakly, a shiver running through his whole body as you leaned closer to him, that ridiculous smirk still on your face.

"Want me to help you warm up?" you whispered, your warm breath wafting over his lips that twitched in response.

"I guess..." Regulus mumbled, trying to fight the smile forming on his lips.

You smiled at his attempt to seem upset, leaning over and softly kissing his pouty lips. An audible "mmm" rumbled through his chest as he slowly forgot about the icy touch of your hands that were creeping up his bare sides and focused on the warmth emanating from your body and the kiss.

As you tilted your head to deepen the kiss, you felt Regulus sneak his hands underneath your shirt, pressing his semi-cold hands to your skin. You yelped softly into the kiss, pulling away to scold him.

"Mhm, how do you like them apples?" the dark haired male quipped, earning himself a playful pinching of his sides.

"How about we both get changed into more comfortable, warmer clothes and we can cuddle up together in the common room, hm? I'll even make you that tea you like so much." Regulus couldn't pass up that offer.

"I'll think about it." That ultimately meant yes, your lips now pressing to his nose before letting him go.

The rest of the night was spent in the common room, you and the others chatting the night away and laughing over steaming mugs of hot chocolate and freshly brewed tea. Regulus was practically glued to your hip, curled up under a blanket with you and letting you rest your head on his shoulder.

Even though he didn't like the cold, Regulus always felt all warm and fuzzy inside seeing just how happy you were whenever winter rolled around. ❄️

© m00nkissedlover, 2024

[runninriot]

Damn You, Capitalism!

inspired by and written for @sidekick-hero , hope that helps getting through the day 🖤 because work sucks (i know!) - but eddie sucks harder 😏

1.231 words | cw: contains smut, nsfw, mdni

also on ao3

Steve has been drowning in work lately, it's a nightmare.

Eddie tries his best to support him, to make things as little stressful for him at home as it can possibly be.

He keeps the guitar unplugged when he's working on new music, to keep the noise at a minimum.

Always makes sure there's some meal ready for Steve to grab and microwave when and if he remembers to eat.

He reminds himself to do the dishes as soon as he's done with them because he knows how much Steve hates when the sink is full of dirty plates and forks and mugs.

Eddie even finally figured out how to use their new washing machine - he's not stupid, just lazy, and- why does that damn thing need so many buttons?

So, yeah. He's trying, really, because it breaks his heart every night when Steve comes home from work, looking one moment away from collapsing. Always tired, always moody, just- miserable.

Eddie wishes he could do more. Wishes he could take some of Steve's stress away, help him relax. Ease his mind just for a while.

And- look, he knows what would probably, most definitely help, that's not the thing. The problem is, Steve can barely even stay up long enough to kiss Eddie goodnight as soon as they're in bed. So any attempts of trying to have some one-on-one quality time with his husband aren't really up for debate right now.

Right?

Right.

He'll just have to wait for this massive project to be over and done with.

---

As Eddie crawls into bed shortly after Steve, he finds him quietly snoring, already fast asleep with his face mushed uncomfortably against his pillow.

Even in his sleep, he looks exhausted and it makes Eddie mad how much that job is demanding of Steve.

He pictures himself in front of the corporate building that holds his husband's soul captive, angrily stomping up and down the pavement while waving a sign that reads Damn You, Capitalism! and the thought makes him laugh.

He realises too late that he's been making an awful lot of noise, instantly shuts himself up with a hand over his mouth when Steve stirs awake and looks at him through bleary eyes.

   "Is everything okay?"

Steve sounds knackered (he learned that word from his British co-worker) and Eddie hates himself for ripping him out of his well-deserved sleep.

   "I'm sorry, baby. Everything's good. I didn't mean to wake you up. Just go back to sleep, okay? I'll see you in the morning."

Eddie leans down to kiss his forehead before he turns off the light and lays down next to him, trying to be as still as he can to let Steve drift off peacefully again.

But the damage is already done. Even without looking he can sense that Steve has trouble falling back asleep and it’s confirmed by the heavy sigh Steve lets out.

   "Can you-" His voice flitters quietly through the room, "Can you suck my dick?”

    Oookay, what?

Eddie can’t help but snort at those words.

Steve must be dreaming. Maybe he did fall back asleep after all.

   “I’m being serious, Eds!” Steve sounds almost offended.

He then rolls to the side and even in the dark, Eddie can see his big eyes staring straight at him.

So, not sleeping, then.

   “Babe, are you sure? I’m just asking because- well, we haven’t done anything for weeks and I miss it. God, do I miss it. But you’ve been completely out of it not even 5 minutes ago and-“

What the hell is he even going on about?

His perfect, beautiful husband wants him to suck him off. Why the fuck is he still babbling instead of using his mouth to do exactly that?

   “I just think it’d help me sleep?”

Steve uses that honeysweet voice of his, the one he knows Eddie can never say no to, the one he always uses to get what he wants. And- like, what is Eddie if not a very devoted, very helpful, very loving husband that would quite literally do anything for his man?

---

Steve’s boxers are gone as quickly as the blanket before Eddie makes himself comfortable between his husband’s spread legs.

It’s almost embarrassing how much he’s already drooling just thinking about the perfect weight of Steve’s glorious cock on his tongue but- excuse him for not keeping his excitement in check when he’s literally been suffering from Steve-withdrawal for weeks now!

Still, he tries to take his time, not wanting it to be over too quickly. He can hear in Steve’s pleading moans that he won’t last long, can taste Steve’s desperation in each drop of precum that hits his tongue as he licks the tip.

It’s heaven.

It’s so good Eddie wants to cry.

    Fuck, he missed this. Missed the familiar stretch of his lips when he takes Steve in, the familiar sound of Steve’s husky voice, the scent of freshly showered skin, the feeling of sinking deeper and deeper on his lover’s cock as he swallows him down like he’s starving for it.

His hips can’t seem to keep still, wiggling and rubbing against the sheets where his own cock is searching for friction. But his focus is on Steve, he can take care of himself later. This is just for the beautiful man that is the light of his life – he deserves it. Deserves to be worshipped like the divine creature he is.

   “Ed- Eddie, oh God! Oh fuck!”

Steve’s words spur him on. He finds the perfect rhythm, uses one hand to pump Steve’s cock while his tongue curls around the tip. His other hand strokes the sensitive skin on his inner thigh, dragging his nails up and down, knowing too well that it drives Steve just a little insane.

   “Babe, I’m- I- fuck! Don’t stop. Please, don’t stop. I’m so close!”

Eddie wouldn’t dream of it.

Not when it makes him so happy to hear and taste and feel his husband slowly falling to pieces. When, with every staggering breath, Steve crawls a little closer to the edge.

Until finally, Eddie is rewarded with a mouthful of Steve’s love; a sweet gift, despite the bitter taste, he swallows with pride, not wasting a single drop of it, taking it all in.

Beneath him, Steve’s trembling through his orgasm, legs shaking and breath uneven. He stops Eddie with a hand in his hair, tugging just lightly to make him look up.

   “Com’ere, baby. Wanna kiss you.”

A little reluctantly, Eddie leaves the perfect place between Steve’s thighs and crawls on top of him to comply.

They kiss slow and soft, no hurry, just their lips finding each other in the dark with gentle pressure.

   “Love you so much, baby,” Eddie whispers against Steve’s lips as he feels his movements slow down.

And as he kisses his way from Steve’s mouth to his cheek, to the tip of his nose, his closed lids and his forehead, Steve’s breathing eases into a steady, calm rhythm.

He’s asleep again, hopefully dreaming of beautiful things as he sinks deeper into Eddie’s embrace, lets his husband's warmth envelope him where they’re lying side by side.

Steve deserves it.

Because tomorrow, he has to fight his way through the constricting clutches of capitalism again.

Man, capitalism really sucks.

But, Eddie laughs to himself, he can suck harder.

[strawberrysnoopy]

ACT ONE: The Photoshoot, Part Four of Four.

warnings: tobacco, smoking, alcohol use, briefest mention of using alcohol as a coping mechanism, mentions of infidelity (as always), ada slander at times (sorry), texting for a while, leon's a bit of a perv, sex, pussy, balls, dick, yeah you get the gist.

(a/n): sike bitch you thought.

FINAL PART OF ACT ONE: THE PHOTOSHOOT.

Your husband was on the dining room floor, groaning in pain, with blood spattered across the kitchen tile from spitting the drips of blood that fell down his throat from his nose. Leon had fucked him up, hard and good. His nose was broken, he had a black eye, his lip was busted open like a button on a shirt, and he had some beginnings of a cauliflower ear. Jesus, Leon gets the damn job done. That must be why he's deployed all the time. "We should..." Leon pauses, wiping some blood from his own unbroken nose with a sniffle. "...take him to the emergency room. I fucked him up pretty good." You nod in agreement, placing your hands on your hips as if you're looking at some new problem that you found in your garden. Like some field mice have been getting into the blackberry bush again. Whatever. You've seen him in worse cases. I mean, there is that time where he tried to kick someone's ass for not playing pool the right way off of three obscenely large tall boy beers. You should've left him then, but now he's on your kitchen floor with his ass beat and his hot ass friend looking down on him. "We should. I think that'll be a good idea. Are you okay? Any impairments?" He shakes his head, loosely gesturing to the black eye that had begun forming, his eyelid peppered in tiny red spots and a smear of a maroon red near the tear duct. The kicker? He wore it so strongly too, like it hadn't bothered him at all, and let's be honest, it hadn't.

You near the front door of your house, pulling the noisy keys out of your pocket to unlock the door. Leon was behind you, hands awkwardly stuffed in the pockets of his denim jeans and tapping his feet. He looked out of place to be awkward. Black-eye clad with dried blood in the nooks and crannies of his skin. "Never realized how pretty your house was, sweetheart." There was a sudden flush in your cheeks at the nickname, not used to people calling you such names of endearment besides the photographers or shoot directors in a weak attempt to get you to pose correctly. You thank him quietly, unlocking the door and pushing through. You waltz over to the kitchen in a spent fashion, noticing little droplets of blood on your kitchen tile. You know you should be mad. A satisfied wife would be furious that someone had laid hands on her husband. You? You were giddy. Like someone had finally understood what a cunt your husband could be and did something besides laugh it off. You expected Leon to tell him to fuck off or make some snarky remark in defense of you, but telling you that he'd fuck you? God damn, it made your head spin. Yes, you've been replaying this thought in your head for the past few hours and the little flashes in your mind of Leon defiling your loyalty had your panties all twisted up. And he beat up your husband over some little thing like he had been waiting for his opportunity his entire life.

Capital H Hot.

You go through the rounds of patching him up, making silent conversation to ease that burning in the pit of your stomach. The conversation had been chock full of apologies from Leon, saying how he was sorry on saying he'd fuck you. "I'm sorry." He begins, and you raise your hand up to stop him from saying anything more.

Sorry? Why on god's green earth would Leon be sorry in saying he'd fuck you if your husband wasn't doing the job correctly? If anything, the statement had set your skin ablaze with salacity and your mind buzzing with impure thoughts of him fucking you against their marital beds. "Don't apologize." You spoke, eyes accidentally shown to be half-lidded, hiding it behind the "fact" you're looking down at the splat of blood on his cheek. "If that's what you truly mean, say it. It's not a crime to find someone attractive, the only thing wrong is if you act on it." His mouth is left open for a few beats before making the two parts of his jaw meet again. He couldn't tell if it was an admission that you had been feeling the same turmoil he'd been feeling. Those sleepless nights. Staring at the ceiling next to your spouse while they sleep, desiring what they cannot have in another bed. Your patience was pinching, the thirst through your thighs turning into a ticking time bomb, and to rephrase the previous points, your cunt was in unbearable need to get fucked. "Then I guess I want to fuck you." There was no dancing around it. No I'm attracted to you in a friendly "that's the way it is" type of way. Straight to the point. I want to take off my goddamn clothes and fuck you. I want to be intimate with you in the most perverse ways possible. You should slap him. You shouldn't have tended to his wounds. You shouldn't have let him into the comfort of your home.

But you did. Because you want the same thing as Leon. Sex. Not the cheap sex your spouses have been trying to give you for your entire relationship. Sex.

Your hand strays from his face, sucking in a breath when you wipe up the rest of the dried blood. He hopped off the counter, his finger subtly swiping against you hip to stave off that insatiable beast in him that wants to fuck you.

"Come to my room." You whisper, your chin barely brushing over your shoulder, clad in the bland cardigan you wore to keep yourself warm from the chilling night thus far. And you sound like you're inviting him for sex. And he doesn't want to fucking reject you.

"Is this okay?" You hold up an old college t-shirt to him, bringing the fabric closer to his still clothed chest. The shirt was one of your husband's from long ago. You had honestly thought about tossing out the shirt in a yard sale but never had the time or will to do so. "Should be." He pulls off his shirt in a languid motion, slipping the ratty tee over his head instead. Your eyes catch Leon's trail of hair, well groomed and cut down not too long ago judging based off of the short stubbly hairs on his abdomen. "Rude to stare, silly girl." You mumble out a quiet "sorry" to him while leaving the bedroom, presumably changing into your own pajamas. But before you can get two feet out the door, he's tugging on your wrist. "Stop." His voice is quiet, lustful with that slight demand. Your eyebrows knit together in confusion, wondering where he's suddenly getting the gall to tug on your wrist like this when he was just begging for forgiveness so much earlier. Your confusion unwrites itself on your face when he takes off your husband's shirt. He's shirtless again, the long scars and fading bruises and cuts from missions he's taken a few weeks prior visible on his skin. Your eyes don't fail you when they settle on the happy trail you were drooling over moments ago. "Why are you looking at me like that, hm?" He asks, moving closer by a smidge, you wouldn't have noticed if your senses weren't already heightened by the arousal you've been feeling since he first came over for dinner. Damn him, keeping you wound up like a clockwork toy and expecting you to prance over like some whore. "You're married. I'm married." He's getting closer, lips tracing towards your cheekbone and getting closer to your ear. "Honey, has anyone ever told you how wrong that is?" You swallow down so goddamn hard, your esophagus might as well have been torn to shreds. "Leon—" He interrupts you, pulling away from your cheek and letting his eyes flit over your body, tutting his tongue as if he's disappointed you're not naked already. "I'm not finished, sweetheart." "Do you know how torturous it is? Looking at you while you're married and you don't even have a fucking clue as to how bad I want to fuck you against every surface of the home you share with your husband? Even though I cannot have you? You're such a fucking tease, making me want you like some goddamn degenerated pervert." His lips tease the skin near your jaw, breathing in your essence like he was stealing it for himself. "And Ada. Oh, she's no fucking help. Treating me like I'm some whipped dog for her. Even when she's never there. She doesn't know I dream of you every time she's away."

You can't even speak. This was such a far cry from the Leon you knew. This was the same man who always had snarky comments and sarcastic one-liners that made you laugh, who respected you, who talked to you like you had known each other since birth. Then again, yearning is an insane drug and Leon's a loyal addict. "Say something before I go insane, sweetheart." He whispered, nudging your head to the side, allowing access to your pulse, rapidly beating under sweaty skin. You don't say anything. Your hands just weave themselves into his hair, tugging and pulling him closer when he's brough into a passionate kiss. Your hands are about to reach for his belt when his phone buzzes. The first time, it's ignored in the heat of the moment. Maybe just some old friend asking to meet up later this weekend. You're in the middle of pulling the belt off, his hands greedily grabbing at your tits and ass when the phone buzzes again. "Need you." He whispered, biting your cheek like some wild animal. The buzzing of texts eventually turn into a consistent vibration of a phone call. Pulling out his phone, Leon realizes it's something he can't just ignore for some pussy. "We need to stop." You murmur back to him, trying to wean yourself off of kissing him. Stop, stop, stop. Even though you don't want to and the only thing you'd enjoy is having him bust your head in against the headboard while telling you how much he loves your pussy.

But he pulls away, stopping the kneading on your ass and your tits, much to his displeasure. For a minute, you're left panting and with the ever lingering feeling of his strong calloused hands all over your skin. You stare down at the emboldened caller ID. Ada. You rewet your eyes by blinking, eyes going dry by staring wide-eyed at his phone. Is he gonna answer that? You hope not. You want him to finish what he started and especially after all of those admissions of lust to you as well, there's no going back. He sighed, picking up the phone while you walked out of your own bedroom. You feel sick. You're supposed to love your husband but your pussy is fucking throbbing at the way another man's hands explore your body. His best friend, no less. He's supposed to be the strong and outspoken man yet he's on a leash for his wife who treats him like shit. And for the first time, you finally mutter a fuck you to Leon you mean with your full chest.

taglist: @heylesamis, @sweetserial, @iloveyousomuch1989, @galatict3a, @m1sery-busin3ss, @ssulfurr, @nic-stars, @g0rep1ty,@nomorekerkanymoranymor,

[wxshing-aep]

Hiii, I saw ur request post!! could you maybe

write some dating Ethan morales hcs??💖

Dating Ethan Morales Would Include

pairing: ethan morales x reader (all characters are 18+) AN: this will be dating college!ethan cause i thought it'd be more interesting, also didn't proofread this warnings: swearing, gets nsfw in the second half so 18+ (minors dni)

-

you met ethan when you were assigned to tutor him cause he was failing calc. you originally found him to be pretty obnoxious and got tired of his overly nonchalant attitude which culminated in you yelling at him about how he needs to start trying or he's gonna get kicked out. he made no move to respond to your angry rant and just stared back at you with wide eyes and blown out pupils. "what?" you question. "sorry, you're kinda really fucking hot when you're mad"

one of your study sessions ended with him pulling you onto his lap while you made out and his hands roamed your body

he got a little nervous asking you out on a real date even though you've already made out multiple times. he was a bit worried that you'd reject him. he wasn't sure if you'd want a serious relationship with him since he's got a bit of a womanizer reputation. (spoiler alert: you said yes)

his grades got a lot better once he actually started trying because he loved seeing how excited you'd get for him when he showed you a good grade that he got on a test

ethan's love language is definitely physical touch. he needs his hands on you at all times, normally around your waist or resting on your thigh. he's constantly drawing little shapes on whatever part of your bare skin he has access to. most of the time he doesn't even realize he's doing it

you go on a lot of late night drives that may or may not end with the two of you in the backseat of ethan's car

he loves when you wear his clothes but still consistently accuses you of robbing him. "wearing my jacket again, you little thief" "oh, did you want it ba-" "no"

he is your own personal hype-man, there is no shortage of compliments coming from him

"see you later, gorgeous", "damn, my girl looks sexy", "my girlfriend is the most beautiful person on the planet"

he lets you braid his hair when you're bored

he'll match his nail color to yours but will never admit that he did it on purpose and always insist that it was a coincidence

he gets very jealous, but will deny it if you call him out. you were once at a party very innocently talking to a male friend from your psych seminar about how hard your recent test was before ethan walked over to your conversation.

"oh hey, jack, this is my boyfriend ethan" you introduce him, "ethan, this is-" "yea, don't care" ethan interrupts before pulling you by the waist into a searing kiss until jack had left. "there's no reason to be jealous you know? he's just a friend" "i'm not jealous, but that loser was definitely eye-fucking you" "he was not eye-" "let's go make out"

ethan is very distracting when you're trying to study or do any homework

"baaaaaabe, i'm bored", he whines. "m'sorry but I really have to do this research paper" you respond. "or", he starts, closing the book in your hands and tossing it to the side of your bed, "you can take a much needed break and do me instead"

his friends call him whipped bc of how obsessed with you he is and he doesn't give a fuck cause he is in fact obsessed with you

he lets you color in his tattoos

he definitely tries to teach you how to skateboard and holds both your hands if you're too scared to let go of him

he got you a necklace with his initial on it and has a ring with your initial on it

nsfw 18+

that man definitely knows what he's doing in the bedroom cause, let's face it, he was a bit of a whore in the past

you guys have a lot of sex, like a lot of sex to the point where you might have gotten a few noise complaint's from the people that live next to your dorm room

he's a capital M Munch. ethan loves eating pussy, like he definitely does it for his own enjoyment. he could spend hours in between your thighs and any moans or whimpers coming from you just egg him on even more

ethan was so turned on when you agreed to sit on his face

"your face is pretty", you complimented him. "yea? you should sit on it" oh. "like sit on it sit on it?" "sit. on. it." "but what if I like suffocate you or something" "you won't, and if you did i'd die happy" so you did and holy shit does that boy know how to use his mouth. he wouldn't stop till you came on his face multiple times and your legs are shaking around his head

he keeps his hair long cause he likes when you tug on it while he's eating you out. it turns him on so much that he has to actively try not to cum in his pants while he's going down on you

ethan is very vocal, he's not afraid to let you know that he's enjoying it. he whimpers for sure. while he's definitely a giver he loves when you have your mouth on him. his mind goes fuzzy when you're blowing him, moaning your name, shaking under you

he's a bit of a sub and loves when you boss him around. ethan absolutely loses his mind when you choke him while you're riding him. he just loves seeing you on top of him, telling him what to do, using him for your own pleasure. he'll beg, especially if you're edging him

"baby fuck please i need it, i'll be your good boy i promise"

jealous!ethan is definitely more dominant though. "right there baby? look how wet you are for me. he can't fuck you like i can hmm? want you to cum on my dick like a good girl"

this man cannot hide when he's horny. he immediately gets super handsy and will be whisking you off to the nearest bathroom

he loves your boobs. holding them, sucking on your nipples, cumming on them if you're cool with that. your chest is rarely not covered in hickies.

you're obsessed with ethan's hands and he knows it. he knows how to use them and has no problem sneaking them into you under the table on a date night, only to remove his hands from you right before you finish and make a point of sucking the fingers that had just been inside you clean while holding eye contact with you and letting a smug look take over his face

he has a praise kink and definitely responds with "yes ma'am" when you boss him around. he's gotten turned on when you guys are arguing before, there's just something about you yelling at him that goes straight to his dick

if you wear a sundress, oh it's over for him. he'll have you bent over the nearest surface in seconds and the dress stays on.

[identifying-cat-phenotypes]

Are the aristocats coats possible? Could an all white cat (f) have a solid black (m), an orange (m) and a solid white(f) kittens?

(thanks and sorry english isn't my first or second language)

You could do a lot with them, that's for sure! Here are what the Aristocats family looks like, for those that don't know/can't remember.

Ignore O'Malley. This isn't about him.

It's possible, very possible actually, ESPECIALLY with the fact that we don't know the sire. That is a lot of creative freedom I can work with. I'll go into depth on each kitten's genetics below the cut :)

I want to have fun with this. If you know a bit about cat genetics, you'll quickly see how convoluted I make these answers because genetics are fun. Silly kitties with their silly genes and I will have FUN damnit!

Duchess's white is epistatic over everything. That means, we can really go crazy with what is under there. Eumelanin colors, red, tabby, solid, inhibitor, it can be whatever.

Therefor, I'm calling her a (technical) cryptic tortie. Below are the expressions I've decided to give her.

O/o, -/- W/w, l/l

I'll keep her black locus blank, as that will be affected by the sire. I'll be doing them last, so it'll be done last too.

Now, if you look at Berlioz, you'll notice something. He has a lighter gray stomach! That means I have to give him inhibitor at some point. You can also see this on Toulouse! However, since he is red, I'm passing it off as tabby. No inhibitor for him.

Marie is easy, so I'll just do her right now. The only note I have is that the sire HAS to be L/l in order for Marie to stay longhaired.

l/l, W/w

Onto the other kittens!

To stay as close to canon, Berlioz must have:

Black self (B/-)

Inhibitor (I/-) <- capital i

No white (w/w)

To stay as close to canon, Toulouse must have:

Red tabby (O/Y)

No white (w/w)

This means that we know EXACTLY what the sire has to have. It has to not have white, and have inhibitor. It's quite simple! However, I like to have fun.

Simple Genetics:

Duchess: l/l, O/o, B/B, W/w, i/i longhaired white (black self tortie) Unnamed Sire: L/l, o/Y, B/B, w/w, I/i shorthaired Marie: l/l, O/o, B/B, W/w, I/i longhaired white (black smoke tortoiseshell) Berlioz: L/l, o/Y, B/B, w/w, I/i shirthaired black smoke Toulouse: L/l, O/Y, B/B, w/w, i/i shorthaired red false-tabby

Now, you may be saying, "Robin, what possibly could be next? You've done all their genetics!" This is true! I just did it, however, I like to have a LOT of fun here. Fictional cats (cough. Warriors. cough) are my puppets, and I make them dance to my own rhythm.

Lets have fun with epistatic traits. Lets make these cats as far away from canon (but still technically recognizable) as possible. The world is MY oyster.

Duchess is now a longhaired cinnamon (b1/b1) self (a/a) cryptic tortie. Color-pointed (cs/c) with full white. The sire is now a shorthaired (L/l) black-silver (B/b1, I/i) tabby (A/a) with high tabby-breakage (spotted tabby).

So... onto:

Mod Robin's Funplex Cat-Genetics Note: I'm having fun. This is not accurate to real life probabilities.

Duchess: l/l, o/o, b1/b1, a/a, cs/c, W/w, i/i longhaired white (cinnamon colorpoint, carrying albinism) Unnamed Sire: L/l, o/Y, B/b1, A/a, C/c, w/w, I/i shorthaired black-silver spotted tabby (carrying albinism) Marie: l/l, o/o, B/b1, A/a, c/c, W/w, I/i longhaired albino white (black-silver spotted tabby) Berlioz: L/l, o/Y, B/b1, a/a, cs/c, w/w, I/i shorthaired smoke sealpoint (carrying albinism) Toulouse: L/l, o/Y, b1/b1, A/a, C/cs, w/w, i/i shorthaired cinnamon spotted tabby (carrying pointing)

yay! kitties :) !!!! <3333

i wrote this at 3pm and a dream okay. please tell me about any mistakes, and dont get mad at me for probability. I WILL have fun in my kitty echochamber and I WILL like it :)

signed, mod robin

[purpledemonlilyposting]

Oh good the Lorch is sending herself asks about me again.

[Lily's Post]

Oh yeah Lily calling marginalized people a "pick me" for not having the same exact opinions as you doesn't make you look bigoted at all.

Unlike you I don't think children's cartoons are activism. And my pointing at that some people like to try to downplay the lesbian themes in Steven Universe, or at least the way lesbians interact with the themes of the show, actually has nothing to do with the show itself.

Hey Lily did you know I also really don't like the word queer being thrown around, refuse to call myself that because it means strange and also dislike "anti-assimilationist" types?

Speaking of which:

[Lily's Post]

Yeah I say that about the kids telling me queer has been "reclaimed" for me. I would think you'd agree, Lily.

Those are two completely different concepts you dumbass. We can have gay content in mainstream media without it being insulting dreck driven by rainbow capitalism.

Lily is the one who basically wants the Hayes Code back. She wants every show and movie to tell her who is good, who is bad, what to think and for the bad guy to get thrown off a cliff at the end.

Lily just because those are the only two pieces of media YOU know I like doesn't mean that's all I like or have ever seen. Have you seen But I'm a Cheerleader? How about Saving Face?

Hey Lily if you'd actually watch my responses to you:

No I sneer at shows with bad depictions of gay characters when they have bad depictions of gay characters. Especially when they break their own spines patting themselves on the back for it.

Are you trying to get ahead of my VOD you falsely struck going back up on Thursday? You know the one where you said an early 2000's flaming queen stereotype in some shitty Alicia Silverstone vehicle was super good "gay rep" because you had some retarded need to paint a narrative that Canadian cartoons "did it first"?

The whole "she's just mad other shows are outpacing things she likes" lol it isn't a competition, dawg. That's you, Lily. That's how you think.

This is how I know its a self ask.

Yeah that's why in my reaction to James Somerton's somehow EVEN WORSE takes on Utena than yours I kept saying things like "Utena isn't really that hard to understand it just tells it's story in a very abstract way".

Also if you think the Sword of Dios is "the sword of patriarchy" you really didn't get it but much like James here I doubt you ever even watched it, Lily. I look forward to your "In a Nutshell" video where you will read out TVTropes with zero context and get everything wrong.

Lily I hadn't watched the show fully in over 15 years when I made my very first video on you. I wasn't even expecting to talk about Utena you just went on a tirade about it in the middle of your 2023 Steven Universe video.

In fact, the reason I even cut that video in the first place is I was so impressed with my own recall of the show. And then it got 5k hits out of nowhere on my then completely unestablished channel because people just hate your takes that much.

And now making fun of you has paid for my new GPU and CPU. No Man's Sky is running great and I'm ready for Dragon Age Veilguard so cheers!