#lol. yall had such good goal chances Explore tagged Tumblr posts

[spock-adoodledoo]

stop this madness (0-0 games)

[etherealyoungk]

— ✦ etherealyoungk's 2024 rewind!

i saw this going around so i thought i'd hop onto it and do a little appreciation post for 2024! this is going to contain my top fics, some stats, goals for 2025 and a little paragraph for all my lovely moots on here <3

— top three posts this year!

into the night - jeon wonwoo (with 1918 notes)

sugar & spice - jeon wonwoo (with 1536 notes)

new beginnings - jeon wonwoo (with 1287 notes) honestly didn't think people would like this concept so much haha and not all the top three being wonwoo fics lol.

— longest fic of 2024:

sugar & spice - wc: 29.2k

— shortest fic 2024:

wonwoo fluff drabble - wc: 438

— an unexpected fic in 2024:

love between the lines - chwe vernon (wc: 12k) i genuinely really enjoyed writing this fic. vernon isn't a member i write for often or find a little hard to write, so this was a nice challenge. i honestly don't thing i'd ever have written a long fic for vernon if it wasn't for the collab and i'm so glad i joined and wrote this because i had great fun with it and really happy with the outcome + seeing so many of you guys enjoy it makes me always happy ^^

— some of my fav reads:

tell me that you love me pt 1 & pt 2 by @wheeboo one of the best fics i've read this year honestly this was tooo good like THE joshua fic so everyone go read this right now.

what's wrong with secretary kim with soonyoung by @xinganhao this was the cutest fucking thing i've read and i need more ahhhhhh kae your work is top tier i love it sm.

rates of change by @wqnwoos hana i'm literally in love with you and your writing and ths fic was the cutest thing ever i adored every word and ate it up.

ex-conomics by @ugh-yoongi oml this fic was so fucking good i read it in one go on my bed and it was such an emotional rollarcoaster but you wrote it so well everything was just so so amazing one of my favs for sure.

here and now by @writingmeraki babe im in love with your spy gyu couple im not even kidding when i say i go reread this often like i love it so much okay and i love you.

burnt promises, second chances by @slytherinshua omg zanna please this fic it was so good you wrote it so so well i just loved everything about this and the concept was so cool too!

— milestones in 2024

writng an almost 30k fic bc that is insane to me i never thought i could do that but im so proud of that fic.

hitting 4.5k followers just before the year ends! that's honestly insaneee. i adore each and everyone who reads my work and leaves reblogs and feedback.

joining collabs and doing a collab for the first time was so new but also so exciting for me. hopefully in 2025 i can do more.

— goals for 2025

finishing all my incomplete wips!!! i really really want to finish all the wips i started and left hanging skgjsg bc they were really good ideas and i wanna put them out in the world for you guys to read as well!

try to interact with you guys more? i feel like i don't enough.

— a word to my mutuals <3

to all my mutuals i love and adore you guys so much and i still can't believe i'm actually friends with some of you insane guys i love yall so much and i love this silly little family i have on here, it means the world to me <3

@wheeboo rania i love talking to you and love how i can just come in your dms and be delusional and bounce off ideas with you. i love talking to you about anything and everything. you're seriously one of the best writers and i can't wait to see where 2025 takes us.

@fairyhaos yenaaa my love! i love talking to you and you're the sweetest and your fics are always so so good. i miss you but i hope you're doing well and taking care and uni isn't too hectic. always thinking about you fondly and sending hugs mwah mwahh

@writingmeraki pri the loml my wife i love you so so much. i love how became moots bc of this one post of yours and after that it's history and i just love talking to you about anything and how we just talk about anything and everything <3 i just love us so much. mwah mwah mwahhhhh

@strawberri-uyu nico my love! our convos are honestly the best and i miss you and i hope you're doing well and taking care of yourself bubs <3

@paindivinemp3 my dear maria! you're the sweetest soul ever and i love talking to you about life and things and it's always so nice to talk to you, it always feels like i'm talking to an elder sister 🥺 sending much love <3

@wqnwoos hana i literally adore you and your writing so so much and you're the sweetest kindest soul mwah mwah ily <3

@gyuswhore you're the coolest moot! you're so so talented, an amazing person and just the coolest!!

@jeonsupershy kashii i love talking to you about day6 and seventeen and i adore your gifs they're truly amazing and im so glad we got talking.

@ylangelegy kae omg i love your work it's so good especially your text imagines im in loveeee and plus i know we only started talking but it's so nice to meet another myday and carat and hopefully we talk more!

@gyubakeries tiyaa i love how you text me on discord and we have the most funny convos.

@fxstpace aspen omg new moot but you're so much fun to talk to i hope we talk get to talk more.

and all my other lovely moots that i adore: @blue-jisungs @slytherinshua @kyeomyun @hannyoontify

@weird-bookworm @lvlystars @icyminghao @cheolhub @rubywonu

if i missed anyone im so sorry but just know you guys are so loved by me!

@reikaryu @husbandhoshi @welcometomyoasis @babyleostuff

@odxrilove @holdinbacksecrets @husbandhoshi @naaaaafla

[tradetobest]

dee's january 2024 fic recs

ok so. i thought i'd do a fic rec list every month this year of just my favourite fics that got bookmarked in the month (not necessarily written in the past month) that had just passed... i was a bit busy for the past few days but FINALLY i got the chance to sit down so!!

(if you want to play fic roulette here's some blind links otherwise!! enjoy under the cut

1 2 3 4 5 6)

3:30 by sevenfists

pairing: sidney crosby/evgeni malkin rating: E words: 11k summary: Napping with Sid would be inconvenient, embarrassing, and more than a little gay, and maybe Zhenya was a little gay, but he didn’t need to advertise it.

i LOVE "oh this thing we do together has become a routine now we Have to do it before games" fics and you should too!! this one is So cute i love it....

waiting for confessions of love by catchingpapermoons

pairing: jamie drysdale/trevor zegras/mason mctavish rating: M words: 41k summary: “I’ll be so real with you, man,” Trevor says, pulling back. “I had no fucking idea you liked dudes.”

one thing about me is that i am an absolute sucker for miscommunication and will love it at all costs and this fic DELIVERS!!!! and so well!!

high into the blue by idday

pairing: jack eichel/connor mcdavid rating: T words: 10k summary: Lieutenant John Eichel of the United States Navy – Boston to his squadron and Jack to the people who matter – is reckless and cocky and too smug for his own damn good. But even Connor has to admit that the boy can goddamn fly. (Captain Connor McDavid, Royal Canadian Air Force, is by the book in the worst way, conservative and careful and liable to get himself killed out there. Jack shouldn’t be impressed by him. He really shouldn’t.)

when i tell you i SCREAMED when i got the notif for this fic and then immediately went and watched top gun.,.... if you know me you know anything idday puts out i literally eat up like mceichel is the only thing that will ever sustain me ever again and this was NO exception,,,, always a pleasure to be able to experience an idday fic is what i say

play your heart out by ribena

pairing: leon draisaitl/connor mcdavid rating: M words: 4k summary: Connor loses his heart. Leon finds it for the both of them.

oughh./.. ouhhh.... what even to say.... clutches my heart (lol)...... beautiful..... i literally screamed cried went through it..... please read like literally begs you

nobody wins afraid of losing by adelphenium

pairing: tyler bertuzzi/dylan larkin rating: E words: 12k summary: It’s been almost a year since the first trade. It’s been just a few weeks since they last saw each other, facing off on the ice here in Toronto. In all the months since the Boston run, Tyler’s done nothing but read Dylan’s texts from the notifications bar like a sad and filthy sack of shit, too weak not to feel a thrill whenever a Saw that goal, what a beauty berts or a Hope you’re sleeping ok came through. Or: Tyler and Dylan during the 2024 bye week.

"hey you bookmarked this one on december 31st" IM PUTTING IT IN JANUARY!!!!! PLEASE READ THIS FIC!!!!! not only did jamie adelphenium write it but its just. it has shaped the way i view tyler bertuzzi and sparked a love for mr hockey butt himself..... what a good fic yall please read

reserve your ardors by wrightsworth

pairing: jamie benn/tyler seguin rating: E words: 9k summary: Jamie was in over his head. He had been out of his depth for months if he was being honest, ever since he picked Seggy up from the airport that first time in the humid Dallas air and his Omega genes decided to make themselves known, and loudly.

it wouldnt be me without some good old bennguin and RAHH pining and omegaverse and unrequited-requited and miscommunication like what else could you want in a fic its so good

[ticklishfiend]

Off-Button (My Hero Academia)

Pairing : Lee!Kaminari Ler!Bakugou

A/N : oh my god who new scumbag could actually post again, it's a marvel. no but fr, i've been lurking around the tickle tags forever and reading all of yall's amazing fics and i couldn't help getting back into it, even for just one fic. this isn't tickletober, i do not have the patience for that (u guys having the willpower to make something new every single day is fucking astounding to me idk how u do it lol), but i hope u guys enjoy it anyways! as always, please like and reblog if u can bc i really appreciate the support :D enjoy!! &lt;3

Summary : Denki is incapable of being quiet during Bakugou and Kirishima's movie night they invited him to. Bakugou can't stand it, and decides to take matters into his own hands.

Word Count : 3359 

REBLOGS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED!! LOVE U GUYS! <333

. . .

What the absolute fuck was Spiky Hair thinking when he invited that energy filled blabber mouth to their movie night. 

Denki hadn’t shut up since he got into the damn room, his mouth seemingly going for an exercise run when the movie started and he got to make his own commentary. Katsuki was hoping for a nice, relaxing time with his boyfriend, watch a horror movie or two so Eijirou would snuggle close for comfort, and just all around actually enjoy his evening. 

But goddamnit if Denki wasn’t just the right man for disturbing the peace.

“Holy shit, did you see that?! That head went FLYING! It looks like someone throwing a football to a field goal! Wait, is it a field goal? Kiri, what’s the difference between a touchdown and a field goal? I’m not much of a football man, more of a baseball kinda guy. Although, I’d never turn down tickets to the Superbowl if I ever got the chance. You know they have these huge performances in the middle of the game where famous singers take over the field and just go ham?! I’d go just for that! But not if-”

Katsuki was going to become the next serial killer in a blockbuster horror movie if Denki didn’t shut his fucking mouth soon.

He glared at Eijirou, who was grinning from ear to fucking ear. Oh he did this shit on purpose. He hangs out with Sparky way more than Katsuki does, able to withstand his constant rambling in a way the short-tempered teen has never been able to understand. 

It’s not that Katuski dislikes Denki, though he would never ever fucking admit that out loud. He actually finds him funny sometimes, especially when paired with Sero. The two would probably make a good stand-up duo if Denki wasn’t the type to steal the microphone away just to ramble about every stupid thought that popped into his mind. 

But overall, Katuski does enjoy his company…most of the time.

“-I mean I don’t hate vegetables, but I’m not gonna pick them if I have the choice, y’know? Like if I have the choice between a beautiful bowl of pre-packaged ramen and a fucking green bean, I’m going with the ramen every single time, no question. Oh, but fruit though? That’s a whole different story-”

“Holy shit do you have a FUCKING off button?!” Katsuki shouted to Denki’s spot on the floor, feeling Eijirou give his shoulder a tight squeeze in return. Katsuki whipped his head around to find a disapproving gaze that really pissed him off. “What?! This is supposed to be a movie night, but I haven’t been able to hear the damn thing for it’s entire fucking duration! He’s ruining it!”

“You don’t have to be rude,” Eijirou whispered with a frown. Denki had fallen unusually quiet, and though they couldn’t see his face from their spots up on the couch, they knew what that meant. Katsuki knew what that meant, and damn Eijirou for giving him the ability to feel empathy for others.

Katsuki sighed through a groan, pushing himself off the couch and onto the floor next to Denki. Both were quiet, just sitting next to each other and watching the movie together in an uncomfortable silence.

“I’m sorry for ruining your movie night,” Denki mumbled into his arms which were now propped crossed on his knees. Katsuki pinched his lips together, gaze refusing to avert from the screen.

“You didn’t ruin shit, idiot,” he said, his tone much softer than before. “ Our fault for thinking you could actually be quiet for an hour and a half.”

“Katsuki,” Eijirou threatened from the couch, his inflection enough to make Katsuki realize his mistake in words.

“It was a joke, relax,” Katsuki grumbled like a teen to a scolding parent. Finally looking over at Denki, he started to feel his guilt bubbling to a boil. He cringed hard when he realized what needed to be said, feeling the words practically squirming in his chest with utter discomfort. “I’m…sorry. Okay? I’m sorry,” Katsuki rubbed his face anxiously, basically covering his mouth like it would make his words unheard. “I just like watching shit in silence, alright? Nothing personal, you moron, just…agree to disagree, I guess.”

Denki sat there for a moment. He was letting Katsuki’s apology settle in his system like swallowing a pill he’d never taken before. Bakugou…apologized to him. Actually said the word sorry, and TWICE at that. He couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips.

Denki launched himself at Katsuki, throwing his arms around him tightly before Katsuki had the chance to realize he was fucking hugging him. Katsuki quickly shoved him off like he had a disease, but that smile never left Denki’s face.

“Don’t fucking touch me, Sparky! This changes nothing!”

“You like me!” Denki beamed, repeatedly poking at Katsuki’s arm like it would make him realize it himself. “You said sorry, you apologized to me! Kirishima, we’ve gotta throw a party or something, bake me a cake--shit, bake Bakugou a cake! This is a real turn of events, my friends, a real turning point in our friendship if I do say so myself,” Denki sighed happily, criss-crossing his legs and facing Katsuki with a wide smile. “You like me.”

Katsuki growled at the notion. He couldn’t even deny it, the bastard was right. But he didn’t have to be so damn smug about it. 

Then, like his guardian angel was sending him telepathic messages on how to fucking destory this loser, he remembered something. Something very interesting.

Last week, Sero and Denki had been roughhousing on the floor of the common rooms over something Katsuki couldn’t care less to find out about. All he knew was that Denki had been the annoying little shit he always is, and Sero was finally retaliating against it and winning. He had Denki in some weird wrestler hold, his arms held firm behind his back as he kicked and struggled and refused to apologize for whatever annoyance he had caused.

Then, there was a screech. A loud one, followed by bouts of hysterical laughter and far more thrashing than before. Sero was tickling at his ribs with his free hand, fingers never relenting from the one spot he had a firm ticklish grip on. Denki pleaded and begged, and eventually with enough persuasion, Denki apologized. 

Denki is ticklish, and apparently ridiculously so. This could be helpful. This could be vital.

“I suggest you shut your mouth right now before I find that fucking off button myself,” Katsuki threatened, his eyes peering through his brow in the way a predator would before striking its prey.

“Oh c’moooon, you wouldn’t hurt your best friend, would you?” Denki creened through a grin before giggling with his tongue stuck between his teeth. Such a little shit, he was really milking this for all it’s worth.

“Not gonna hurt you, fucknuts. But I am gonna make you regret everything you just fucking said,” Katsuki growled before shoving Denki onto his back, the electric blonde letting out a confused yelp as he went down flailing. Katsuki kept his hand pressed firmly on Denki’s chest, pinning him to the floor with ease as he clambered on top. 

“Woah, we turning this duo into a trio or what, KitKat?” Kirishima chided in, having been scrolling on his phone for the past minute before realizing the action that was happening right before his eyes.

“Can it, idiot. I’ve got business to attend to here,” Katsuki growled before turning back to Denki with an evil grin. “You ticklish, Sparkplug?”

Denki’s eyes went wide before immediately throwing his arms around himself to protect his torso. “Nope.”

“Ohoho really? You seem awfully nervous for someone who ain’t ticklish,” Katsuki wiggled his fingers in the air menacingly, like a predator about to strike. “And if I recall correctly, Sero had you pretty fuckin’ beat the other day after you tried your luck annoying the shit outta him too.”

Denki’s lips pressed together tightly, the corners wobbling in a vain attempt to keep from giggling already. He shook his head vehemently. “No idea what you’re talking about,” his words came out quick, curling his lips under his teeth as soon as his talking ceased.

“Oh yeah? Well how ‘bout I jog your memory a bit; get that pea-brain of yours back up to speed, huh?” Katsuki slowly moved his wiggling fingers down towards Denki’s sides, the electric blonde unable to keep his giggles in any longer as they flowed out of him through puffs of air through his nose and a bouncing chest filled with butterflies. He swatted slapping hands at Katsuki's quickly, trying to both fight back while also protecting himself at the same time. His elbows stayed glued to his ribs while his hands uselessly bat at the weapons of mass destruction easing towards his torso.

“No, nonono nohoho wahahait,” he giggled nervously, having yet to even be tickled but unable to keep it at bay any longer. 

“Nah, it’s too late for that shit,” Katsuki growled before finally striking, fingers pinching strategically at the boy’s sides right below his ribs. Denki screeched, back arching and legs kicking out behind his tormenter as he reached down to grip Katsuki’s wrists and try to push them away, but it was futile. Giggles poured from him with ease, interlaced with squeals when Katsuki’s fingers came just a bit too close to his ribs for comfort.

“Ahahaha! Wahahait, c’mohohon! Dohohon’t!” Denki shook his head, trying to find any relief from that torturously funny sensation Katsuki delivered to him through gentle pinches and scribbles.

That was another thing throwing Denki completely for a loop; Bakugou was being so gentle. He expected rough digging, hard squeezes that would leave him gasping for air and swirling punches. But instead he got agonizingly tame, insanely ticklish pinches that had him already nearly pleading for mercy. 

“Don’t? Please, you asked for this as soon as you tried fucking with me. I was even being nice to you before, idiot. But noooo, you just had to keep poking the damn bear, didn’t you?” Katsuki emphasized his metaphor by sporadically poking all over Denki’s torso, at his belly, then his sides, up to his ribs, and even his chest, which Denki didn’t know could feel as ticklish as it did.

Denki giggled hysterically, squirming like a worm with his arms pulled close, basically giving up the fight and letting Katsuki do as he pleases. He knew he wouldn’t win if he tried, so he might as well let it happen until Bakugou tires himself out with it.

That is, until, Katsuki’s thumbs found their way into the hollows of Denki’s armpits. Denki squealed loudly, his heels digging hard into the carpet with every kick as his head turned to try and smush his red face into the floor beside him. 

“Oh, sweet spot, huh?” Katsuki grinned, thumbs practically glued to that little spot under Denki’s arms that kept the boy cackling and squirming like crazy. “You seeing this, Kiri? Think he’s gonna keep messing with me after this?”

Eijirou chuckled, phone now beside him on the couch as he enjoyed the show before him. “Oh definitely. Guy’s a glutton for punishment.”

“Yeah, well, we’ll see about that after I’m done with him.”

Denki blushed deeply, turning his head towards Kiri and opening a single eye as best he could with his face all scrunched in laughter. “Kirihihieehehe! Pleheheease! Hehehelp me!” he gasped for air through giggles, talking through his hysteria quite the difficult task. “Mahahake him stohohop!” 

“Oh no, absolutely not. You got what’s coming to you, gigglebox, and I’m not interfering with him when he’s like this,” Eijirou couldn’t help but laugh along, the boy’s laughter too contagious to help it.

“You could always help me, y'know? Cause you already know what I’ll do to you if you don’t, gigglebox,” Katsuki sent Eijirou a wicked smile, fingers still tickling the boy under him relentlessly. Eijirou blushed, before getting up from the couch with a sigh.

“Sorry, Denks, nothing personal,” he apologized with a giggle, obviously not sorry in the slightest. He sat down above Denki’s head, giving his hair a little tussle.

“Nohoho! You dohohon’t hahahave to do thihis!” Denki’s squirming increased before letting in a big gasp of air as Katsuki’s assault finally relented, though his arms stayed glued tightly to his sides. “C’mohon, man, we’re friehehends!” 

“Yeah, yeah, we’re friends, man. And no, I don’t have to do this,” Kiri grinned before grabbing Denki’s wrists, trying to pull them up above his head. Denki tried hard to keep them down, unable to keep the giggles to himself in pure anticipation, repeating “nonononohoho!” as he felt Kiri winning the fight for his hands. They came to a standstill when his hands were near his face, Denki pulling hard to keep them down.  “But I kinda want to, y’know?” Kiri giggled, giving Katsuki a look. “A little help, love?”

“No problem,” Katsuki smiled before bringing his fingers up to flutter softly at Denki’s neck and ears. Denki squealed, high-pitched giggles escaping as he struggled to keep his strength, too focused now on trying to protect his neck with his shoulders. This allowed Kiri to finally pull his arms up above his head and pin them there by the wrists, Denki whining loudly and kicking his legs out in protest.

“Plehehease! I’m sorry, okahay, don’t tickle mehehee!” He pleaded, bringing his knees up to drum against Katsuki’s back.

“Don’t care, didn’t ask,” Katsuki said before bringing his fingers down to flutter softly against Denki’s armpits through his shirt, the boy squealing and screaming out a “no!” in response before falling helplessly into giggles and cackles. “Plus, this is kinda fun.”

His fingers fluttered and spidered for a while, relishing in Denki’s frantic laughter. Katsuki got bored of the flutters after a while, switching to pinching up and down Denki’s ribcage with gentle precision. 

“Nohohoho! I cahahahan’t, mahahan, plehehease! It tihihickles!” Denki shoved his face into his now raised arm, trying to muffle his giggles and hide his flushed face.

“Damn right it tickles, I’m tickling you,” Katsuki looked at Eijirou with a mocking shake of the head and a sigh. “This fuckin’ guy, amirite?”

“His face is so red, man. I think he’s embarrassed ~,” Kiri cooed down towards Denki’s face, giggling at the squeal his words brought.

“I’m nohohot! I’m nohohohot!” Denki shook his head into his arm, squirming even harder and screaming as one of Katsuki’s hands came up to flutter at the open side of his neck, the other still preoccupied at his ribs.

“He’s tryna deny it, Kiri,” Katsuki tsked before bringing his face closer to Denki’s. “You know what we do to liars around here?”

“Nohoho!” Denki cried, not sure if he was replying to Katsuki’s teasing question or just yelling out his preferred word to cry out in ticklish agony.

“Weeeeee…” Katsuki paused both his sentence and his tickling, his hands standing still in the spots they were last playing with. Denki continued to giggle through his panting breath, body tense in anticipation and eyes squeezed shut tight. Seconds passed and still, nothing. Curiosity killed the cat, but Denki couldn’t help opening one of his eyes hesitantly and looking up at Katsuki’s wicked grin. 

Then, he screamed when Katsuki’s hands shot down quickly to squeeze at his hips, falling yet again into helpless cackles. “...tikitikitikitikitickle them!”

“Ahahahaha gohohohod! Thahat’s sohoho- pppffttt hahahaha! -stuhuhupihihid!” Denki shook his head in protest, kicking and bucking his hips like he could knock off his tickler with one good throw. Obviously it didn’t work, and Katsuki continued to tickle him while staying put like he was riding a bull.

“Oh, you callin’ me stupid now? Do you really think that’s the smartest move to make when I’ve got you squealing like a little girl for saying some stupid shit earlier?’”

“I juhuhust said- gahahahaha nohoho! -thahat you lihihike mehehee!” 

“Yeah and how did that turn out for you?” Katsuki asked before scribbling his hands over Denki’s waist, the boy screeching and giggling frantically in response.

“Bahahahad! Sohoho bahahahd!”

“That’s what I thought,” Katsuki grinned before going back to poking around Denki’s belly, a much easier task now that Denki’s flailing arms were out of the equation. “How’s about we find that little off button we discussed earlier, huh? Maybe we can finally get you to shut your trap for once.”

Eijirou giggled with a shake of his head. “You are so mean, Katsuki.”

“Yeah, yeah, you love it,” Katsuki looked at Denki’s face, grinning at the blush he wore and the giant smile overtaking his features and making his nose scrunch up all cutely. “And from the looks of it, so does this little guy. You enjoyin’ yourself up there, dumbass?”

Denki’s belly bounced through his giggles, much softer than before now that he was just being poked at, but still frantic as his belly was very ticklish. “Nohoho!”

“I think that’s the word of the day. ‘No, no, no,’ it’s all you’ve said since we started this shit. You mean that? You want us to stop? Cause hey, say the word and playtime’s over, Sparkplug.”

For the first time since their little tickle fest started, Denki had nothing to say. Just a response of happy giggles and an even brighter blush that he yet again tried hiding in his arm.

“Well would you look at that! Seems like our friend here has some sense after all,” Katsuki smiled up at Eijirou, who rolled his eyes fondly. The redhead already knew Denki didn’t mind the tickles as much as he loved to claim he did, so he wasn’t surprised in the least to find him happily allowing them to continue the torment. 

Katsuki’s pokes never ceased, like they were still on the hunt. “So, about that off button…” He hummed curiously, his pokes traveling all around his belly, sides, and ribs like in a search. “Oh, I know. How about riiiiiight…here!” He stuck his finger in Denki’s bellybutton, scratching and poking at it gently but very obviously efficiently, as the blonde under him let out a loud squeal before his laughs fell silent. Just a bouncing chest and belly with occasional gasps for air to prove he was still laughing up a storm on the inside.

“Hehey, I think you found it! See, he’s gone all quiet now!” Eijirou boasted, looking down at Denki’s hysterical expression with a chuckle.

“Well ain’t that a relief,” Katsuki said, eyebrows shooting up when Denki’s cackles and shrieks returned in a wild new wave. “Guess we know how to shut him up now. Just a little tickle right in this off-button and we’ve got a nice night of peace and quiet,” he said with a hint of sarcasm, as Denki’s laughter had never been louder than now.

Finally, Katsuki’s assault ceased, giving Eijirou a nod to let his arms go. Denki brought them down over his belly protectively, rolling over on his side to curl into a ball of giggles when Katsuki got off and sat next to him.

“So, you still think I like you, numbnuts?” Katsuki asked, grinning proudly as his boyfriend rubbed Denki’s back.

“Ehehe…yeah, kinda,” Denki looked at Katsuki over his shoulder. “I mean, you did just have a tickle fight with me, man. Not really something non-friends do with each other.”

“Hey, not a tickle fight. I didn’t see you getting any jabs in there, did I?” Katsuki said with a poke to Denki’s side, the boy flinching with a yelp before scooting closer to Eijirou like he’d protect him from mean ‘ole Bakugou.

“Fine, a tickle attack then. Either way…” Denki tilted his head with a smug expression, a smile still very present on his face. “...you totally like me.”

Katsuki rolled his eyes before getting up and plopping himself back on the couch, grabbing his phone to scroll like nothing happened. “Whatever, idiot. Just know who you’re messing with.”

Denki giggled, looking up at Kirishima who shook his head with a fond smile. “Trust me, I am very well aware.”

There was a comfortable silence between the three of them before they all seemed to realize at the same time, it wasn’t actually silent in the room.

The movie was still on.

“Oh fucking hell you’ve gotta be KIDDING ME-“

. . .

A/N : hope y'all enjoyed! im working on another fic rn but don't plan on that coming out super soon, y'all know how long it takes me to write sometimes and i've kinda been drowning in schoolwork lately. college is truly a different experience LMAO. anyways, much love y'all imma go do some homework and hopefully get some sleep tonight.

[suaudisruption]

UPDATE: [Explanation + Revamp ]

(i do express some feelings in here that might be a bit of a downer, so if you dont want to read through that, i recommend skipping to the last three paragraphs <3 )

yeesh- hey yall i know its been- definitely a good while since ive posted anything on here, besides things that went down a couple months ago. and first, i want to apologize for not fufilling my goals to get this story out. its been- a very rough year to say the least, a lot of bad things and changes, some good- but its taken its toll on me pretty bad.

i havent forgotten about this story, though. i think about it all the time, i think about disrupt and artifact all the time, and i want to share their story with yall so so bad, but- im stuck in a place where i feel like its?? too late lol??? and i know its not but- i guess it got increasingly difficult over time to actually post things because i wanted to make sure everything was planned out perfectly, that i had a good story to tell and i wouldnt let people down- but the more i kept nitpicking, the more worried i got to even post anything in the first place. and thats something i still really need to work on, tbh.

motivation was another issue in itself- its very hard for me to stay on one thing for too long, especially if it requires a lot of attention- and my struggle this year with mental health made that even worse lol. so while i so desperately wanted to make content- i felt trapped and unable to actually do so.

but i say this all with a reason- and thats because i think im going to revamp this page and give it. give this story one more shot. its not even fully about letting yall down, its also- i dont want to keep this story inside me and never get the chance to tell it, you know..? and i- know the process will take awhile and my organization might be messy, etc- but atleast im telling it in some way- besides lol, i kind of need to tell this story to help heal myself too. i cant leave this abandoned, because its such a big part of me and i- yeah.

ill form a more coherent post when i finish revamping this page a bit, but- to those who are willing and wanting to stick around for how ever long it takes for me to complete my unorganized messy storytelling lol- i truly appreciate you all. it means a lot.

and with all that, off i go to edit some things! please make sure to hydrate and eat something if you can, today <3 your health is always important, mentally and physically <3 <3

[correctdangerousfellows]

Hello! Thanks again for your hard work! I wonder if you're interested in writing hcs about dfel boys falling in love with someone. Not necessarily x readers headcanons but something about how they would feel and how they would show it 👉👈

hello and of course anon! i hope these are what you’ve asked for!

the dangerous fellows boys falling in love

ethan

- this poor boy would be a HUGE mess because let’s be honest here he’s never fallen in love with someone before

- whenever you look at him he becomes bright red and looks away bc he’s so shy around u

- he doesn’t even realize how bad he has it for you until somebody on his baseball team brings up the topic of being in a relationship and his mind immediately goes to you

- he never stopped thinking about you after that

- he’s not the best with words, so he tries to be around you a lot more. he doesn’t like the thought of you being in a place where he can’t protect you

- in addition, he makes an effort to talk with you a lot more. he’s generally much more open with you and tries to crack a joke or two just to see you smile

- if you’re in his class he’s not gonna sleep throughout the entire time for once

- whatever activities or hobbies you like he’ll try to pick up and learn more about it just to have more conversations with you

- would cut his baseball practices short just to walk you home or take you somewhere

- he’s absolutely whipped for u please be whipped for him back i’m begging

harry

- growing up he’s never dreamed of falling in love because of his parents

- he didn’t want to put himself in that type of situation so he’s always been very distant with the idea of love

- falling in love with you tho,,, was something he did not see coming

- but at the same time, how could he not?

- he loves everything about you

- he grows to relish the warm n fuzzy feeling in his heart whenever he sees you

- he’s always been a sweetheart, but with you he’s even more gentle and caring

- offers you his help every chance he gets, brings you a small snack everyday, sends you good morning and good night texts, etc. you’re basically his entire world and he treats you like it

- when he’s around you his headaches doesn’t hurt that much anymore

- he embraces his love for you and while he’s a bit nervous about everything because he doesn’t want to wind up like his dad, but with you, he’s more than willing to take the chance

zion

- this man has never once considered falling in love with someone since he automatically assumes that people just want him for his money

- so when you came along he’s suddenly dealing with this new weird feeling in his chest and this idiot immediately dismissed it as being sick

- he panics when the feeling doesn’t go away

- he realizes he’s in love the moment he sees you laugh and he realizes that he’ll do anything just to see you like that again

- he makes up random excuses to be around you more

- you’re going to get lunch? he insists on taking you out because “you probably forgot your wallet so he’s coming just in case”

- you need to go do homework? for the first time in his life he’ll go to the library because “he also had to study for that biology test on friday” he never studies

- ditches all his hang out plans with his friends for you

- he especially loves teasing you because he loves the reaction he gets out of you but he never passes the limit

- he swallows his pride and tries asking somebody like lawrence what to do confessing for you because he’s just so incredibly in love with you and wants to give you the absolute best

eugene

- the moment he realizes he’s in love with you is when he’s trying to write a song and his mind is literally just you

- enters the first stage of grief, denial

- “maybe if i ignore it long enough it’ll go away”

- it doesn’t

- a complete tsundere, he acts like he doesn’t care but the moment you say that you’re cold this man is stripping for u LOL

- shyly asking you if you could hear his new songs

- gets flustered about EVERYTHING. he thinks you’re the most adorable person in the world and he hates it bc it’s hard to look at u without blushing

- he does extra stuff for you. buys you food, waits for you outside your classroom, and is always keeping you company

- he tells you about his dreams and goals, and you’re the first one to ever hear his songs. he gets nervous singing to you because you’re his audience, but when he stares at your face and sees how gorgeous your eyes are, he no longer feels anxious

- when you’re not with him, he becomes a bit more cranky and gloomy. he doesn’t like the small ache in his heart whenever you’re not around

- takes weeks to write a song just for you to tell you about his true feelings

lawrence

- dude has the same routine everyday

- all he does is go to school, study until 3 in the morning, sleep, repeat

- he doesn’t really particularly look forward to anything until he met you

- he has never ever considered the concept of love bc his parents refused to let him date, so his heart beating faster and his face becoming red whenever you were around was definitely a surprise. he’s not stupid tho so he figures out that he likes you pretty fast

- tries to ignore his growing feelings for you because he wants to prioritize his schoolwork, but he can’t help but stare at you a lot more

- once he got the opportunity he offered to tutor you on certain subjects

- takes you out on study dates in coffee shops

- yall don’t get any studying done LMAO u guys got too carried away with talking but it’s fine bc u both managed to get ur homeworks done somehow

- whatever you tell him he remembers. homeboy remembers every single detail about u bc he pays sm attention to u

- he's also whipped af u could muse about wanting something and he'll get it for you asap

- extremely patient with you, drops his own work to help you with your own

- he becomes one of your teacher’s assistants just so whenever he came across grading your work he can give you the automatic 100%

- he’s completely fallen for you, he doesn’t care about his parents’ stupid rule about dating anymore. as long as he has you and can make you happy, he’ll be more than welcome to be your boyfriend

this was extremely fun to write, thank you for the request anon!

> lychee

[gaylittleinnkeepers]

azzie watches naruto— episode 5

Oh No Oh Fuck

(notes: NOTHING)

every time i watch the opening i die when narutos like “CAWM ONNN”

also the part it says “in fighting and in love” it shows sasuke with naruto so in conclusion i think thats gay

ah right i forgot the last ep ended with murder

kakashi getting mowed down

SUCK it was a LOG

sasuke is a monkey-?

sakura being obsessed with sasuke is scary

OH NO DID SHE GET KILLED

she looks mind controlled

THIS IS A DREAM RIGHT

SASUKES DYING AHAHAHAHA

kakashi likes to freak out girls lmao

sakura honey, this is where simping gets you~

SASUKE GOT A HITTT GOOD JOBB

but he dint get no bell uh uh

“THERES NO TIME TO READ MAKEOUT PARADISE”

sakura…stahp…

NARUTO its a trap isnt it? the lunch

oh fucc sasuke got that chakra

OH FUCC

HES LIKE A DAMN SKYRIM DRAGON

kakashi’s exactly like gabriel agreste in adriens life

*always disappearing*

sasuke became a sand mermaid god bless

aw kakashi gets to read makeout paradise <3

NARUTOS LITTLE “EHEHE” IS JUST SO FUNNY I CANNOT

sakura- SAKURA NO

sasuke is such an oblivious bean i-

sakura’s inner demon is back! love of my life

OHOHO IS SHE TRYNA OUTWIT HIM

omg sasukes demon guy looks like a twelve kizuki lmao

TIMES UPP YALL FAILED

“all i did was lay unconscious???” wahaha

YESS ITS SAKURAS INNER DEMON <3

fucking WHAT KAKASHI

this is some fucking brutal honesty

OWO LORD LESBIANNNB!!!

s q u i r t s

SASUKE STOP TRYNA KILL HIM OMG

“sASukE kUnNNnNnNnnn!!!!”

oh theyre supposed to work together

ITS CALLED FOUND FAMILY YOU FOOLS

B R A I N L E S S

SAKURA IS SMORT

kakashi calling out sakura’s simping lmao

KAKASHI WAT

wtf

OH HES KIDDING LOL

kakashi is sadistic as fuck istg

THE DEAD NINJAS

naruto you want ur name on there now???? huh????????

ohohoho extra chance??? noice

LMAO “dont let naruto have any”

IRUKAAAAA

LESBIANNNN

ive decided that iruka is also a lesbian OwO

imagine if naruto still had diarrhea

AHAHA SASUKE THATS GAY

“here have my lunch <3” THATS SO GAY CMON

sakura having troubles giving lunch is funnee

naruto simping zenitsu style

OH NO KAKASHI IS HERE FOR MURDER

OH NOEEEEE

rip team seven god bless

SQUAD GOALS OMGGG

OMG THEY PASSED YEAHHHHHH

thats cute ngl

kakashi like “i like these lil rats ima keep em”

SAKURAS PRECIOUS LITTLE SMILE I CANT

SASUKE SMILED WAAA

naruto being a sailor moon character lmaoo

YESSSSSS SAKURAS DEMON I LOV

@mantabanter THERE WE GOOO! this was such a wacky episode i cant. i loved it sm tho

like i am already in love with these idiots and its been FIVE EPISODES-

anyway watch out for ep 6!! soon!! (i need to write a bunch of shit)

oH and i finally made imogen’s team- theyre called team zeila hehehe

[milkybunbuns]

being the miya twin’s sister

w/ osamu + atsumu

wc: 772

warnings: atsumu landing on breasts, not proper writing

a/n: i got so inspired after reading a bunch of fics on wattpad so yee :D also im legit 100% sure this isnt gonna turn up in tags and im just gonna end up reblogging it. its like if i don’t post for one day tumblr starts to think im a bot or something and my recent works wont show up smhh

You’ve always sided with Osamu as a kid, mainly cause he always gave you food and Atsumu would always be a big meanie >:(

So for some reason, your parents entrusted you to their care for a few hours while they went to a distant relative’s wedding, but like honestly you probably could’ve taken care of yourself just fine, being a middle schooler you were easily able to rummage through the fridge full of Osamu’s food to munch on 😋

Anywaaysss, they took you out cause you wouldn’t stop bugging them about how you were bored and soo yall went to a playground near by

“’tsumuuuu, play on the slides with meee, pretty pleaseee?”, you asked said boi, looking down at your ands to act all cute and stuff lol. Osamu was lowkey confused and betrayed liek, ‘i gave u all my love (food) and you repay me like this? i- what.’ what he didn’t knoww was u had a rlly good plan.

Obviously, Atsumu was oblivious to your plan and was over the moon that his little sister who always loved Osamu over him asked HIM to play slides instead of Osamu. He immediately started boasting to Osamu and as u were climbing the ladder to the slide, Atsumu trailing closely, you put your plan into action. You stomped down on his face, repeatedly kicking your feet at his face to which he yelled at (osamu was definitely laughing in the background). then he fell off and splat into something surprisingly soft, which was a girl who had clearly gone through puberty early. She seemed to be fuming, y’know, mood swings and stuff and legit gave Atsumu the worst beating of his life. Guess who was cackling and doubling over with laughter on the sides? Yup, you and Osamu

It also happened that Aran was passing by and sweat dropped ta the scene, quickly running away to not get involved in it

Ever since that day, Atsumu never trusted you again, honestly at times he thought you and Osamu were more like twins instead of him and Osamu. But then again, he was glad not to the call his grey haired twin a twin of his. After all, his blood was too amazing to be shared with such peasants, maybe you were a lil exception... 👉👈 he still luvs ya y’knoww :3 even after all the mean things youve done to him when ganging up on him with osamu

But anyways, at the end of the day, he’s still your bro and you still treat him with love

He always tries to take advantage of it >:(

Or mocks you :((

Whenever he’s feeling upset, you try cook him his favourite but it never turns out anywhere near as good as Osamu’s, but at least you tried for him.. he actually really appreciates it, even if he might be a little annoying jerk and laugh at ur cooking at first

Osamu to him is more like tough love, will gladly punch him to get him back to his senses and remind him to keep going. but then his ego will just sky rocket :v

When Osamu is feeling upset legit none of you can tell it, unless he actually starts breaking down.The amount of times you've seen him cry? 0. The only time he’s been seen crying was when he was a baby, after he turned 3, he didn’t really cry anymore, so u never got a chance to witness his tears :p

When ur upset oh damn ur in a ride. You’ve seen what they’ve done to people who made u upset and they always comfort u in the best ways, but u seriously don’t want ur brothers hunting down the people who made u sad and forcing them to apologise and bow down at ur feet lmaoo. So basically whenever u get upset, u make sure to wipe away those tears before they arrive so they never suspect a thing cause u srsly don’t wanna be in the middle of the hallways with people apologising at ur knees-

When u do get caught by them, they will legit treat u like a princess for 24 h, i mean that’s their goal but they kinda ditch it half way through. Osamu makes Atsumu be your personal comedian (clown) and will makke u lots of yummy food. They will watch any show with u and u have all rights over the tv remote but sooner or later they’ll ask u what’s wrong after they have finished pampering u lol. They want names boi, names. All in all, yall luv eachother :))

[wexhappyxfew]

Happy Trivia Tuesday sunflower sister 🌻🌻 what are some moments in your writing that you’re super proud of?

aw jj! thank you! and happy trivia tuesday my sunflower sister!! and OMG this question IM LIVING FOR!! you’re really about to make me just GO OFF!! 

i am taking the opportunity to talk about hazel and joe JUST BECAUSE i worked really hard to make it a good relationship between the two simply because of how different they are but how well they truly work so ~ ENJOY! <3

Hazel Parker and Joe Liebgott

so one of the things i’m super proud of myself for in my writing is actually writing hazel and joe’s friendship/relationship - and i know it’s not just a certain and such, but it is something i worked SUPER HARD ON to really develop and really delve into and really work on so that even when we get into postwar people are still commenting things like ‘yes i’ve always loved these two’ or ‘their relationship is beautiful’ etc, things like that! AND LET ME TELL YOU IT HAS PAID OFF!! 

when i first developed the concept for writing The Soldier of Stars - none of my female characters had any relationship goal for the end - just because i say that and the love interest switches the entire time, so i told myself no goals - just write and see what happens - and well it sorta just happened.

for me hazel and joe’s relationship is strictly about the friends to lovers trope, but mainly the idea of, they have set foundations of trust, loyalty, love, inside jokes, humor, they understand one another, can talk about anything, comfort each other, be vulnerable - all the sorta things that a normal best friend would be like! and then it sorta just developed into an actual relationship - but i loved it so they stuck around!!

but every friendship or relationship i write has those factors in it - always. 

hazel and joe was very much just a pure connection they had with one another - they’re complete opposites, they live on different sides of america, and they don’t essentially really function the same. you have hazel parker, this pure, sweet, innocent, and soft-spoken sort of young woman and then you have joe liebgott, a sarcastic, slightly angry, loud mouth and opinionated sort of guy. but together? they both bring out different sides of one another that we normally don’t see. 

joe brings out hazel’s funny side, more relaxed side and we even see her dangerous side around him such as during d-day when she gets into battle at brecourt manor. hazel brings out joe’s soft side YALL KNOW WHAT I MEAN - he literally turns to a soft bean around her, and i’ve loved writing it sm!! to be able to develop joe liebgott’s character past the normal ‘angry, hot-headed’ sorta person and actually make him a human being - one with emotions, who is fiercely loyal to his friends, understands emotions, can be SOFT - that sorta thing. and it has been fun to write. 

they’re friendship and relationship has always just been about being open to one another, and not trying to shy away from issues that might surround them - they just know that if theres a problem they can go to each other, and that they always know they can go to one another. 

and sorry, bit of a self-promotion - not really but idk what to call it, but just some comments from readers that make me just super proud and relate to this topic just because i can’t find anymore words and these comments fill in for it LOL 

THESE ARE JUST A FEW OF MY FAVS!!

“ their friendship is one of the things i love most in this story.”

“ he knows her so well <3 “

“ this was so cute!! omg they are perfect for each other!”

“ they’re so in love.”

“ MY HEART I LOVE SOFT LIEB!”

“ you have no idea how much i love their friendship <3″

“ i love their friendship two completely different personalities yet share the same bond.” 

“ i love the friendship between lieb and hazel.”

“ best friends you say? me refuses to accept.”

“ the chemistry *side eye gif*” LOL

“ i swear, we’re all shipping them. they’re endgame.”

“ i am still waiting for lieb to realize he’s got it for her -let’s be real, he’s gonna realize before hazel.” 

“ the way you write joe and hazel is so amazing!!”

“ I love their love <3″

“ i can see hazel sloooooooowly realising she loves lieb.” 

“ i love soft Lieb. he is the best <3″ 

just some of my favorite comments throughout the series on joe and hazel bc honestly the two are soft and pure beans together and i love them - i could go on but these comments sum them up enough so i’ll stop LOL <3

the last thing i want to talk about is my use of...

EMOTIONS

in my stories, i’m really proud of how i have used emotion and how it has impacted the story - i’ve had readers saying before that the way i write using emotion has made them actually feel the emotions through the text or get emotional which is something i personally strive for as a writer! emotions have always played a big part in my life as a fairly emotional person so writing with emotion is something i’ve grown to be super proud of! and it just helps people really relate to the story i feel - whether it’s happy, sad, angry, upset - all of it - i just for me see it always as a way for someone to relate.

so really writing emotions i’ve seen such a growth in my stories for that specific reason, through simply writing emotions. i feel for me as a writer i’ve always wanted to make people feel the emotions i feel when writing, so really clicking into emotions and such is just something i’ve always done and it has translated to my writing :) it’s just a huge part of who i am!!

thank you sm for the questions jj!! sorry i sorta went off with hazel and joe - i love those two with all my heart and this question gave me the chance to really just go off on my love for them AHHHHHHH and the emotions i could go on but it is already long enough LOL thank you sm!!! <#

[inspiringwhilerespiring]

Get to know me?

Yoooo - yall remember Myspace, and people would blog survey posts lol. Well thats me, I’m people. And I just wanna write my lil heart out and avoid all of my real life responsibilities. So found a lil questionnaire thing and I’m gonna fill it out. Also lowkey like doing this every so often so I can look back on it and reflect and see how much I may have grown/changed/shifted viewzzz ya feel? :) 

Sooo here yall go <3 

1. Who was the last person you held hands with?

My neice maybe?

2. Are you outgoing or shy?

People who know me would tell me to put outgoing, but I honestly feel shy on the inside, so it just depends.

3. Who are you looking forward to seeing?

Literally anyone lmao fuck this quarantine

4. Are you easy to get along with?

Definitely

5. If you were drunk would the person you like take care of you?

Lets hope so

6. What kind of people are you attracted to?

Kind souls <3 always notice how they talk to their friends and family, but even people they don’t know like servers or janitors, etc. that shit matters heavy.

7. Do you think you’ll be in a relationship two months from now?

Probably not

8. Who from the opposite gender is on your mind?

A few homies

9. Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?

Nah not really, just depends

10. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with?

Not sure -it’s been a min since I had a “deep” connection or convo that I can remember - but was probably with my bestie R’Bo

11. What does the most recent text that you sent say?

“Google that shit” lmao me, giving advice to my friends

12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?

TOUGH!!!! After Hours by The Weeknd is up there, Cayendo by Frank Ocean (been jamming his shit HAARD lately) and Inside Friend by Leon Bridges & John Mayer….but also been listening to albums - like Childish’s new album, Floreyyy for lo-fi shit, and also got into 070 Shake recently just to name a few.

13. Do you like it when people play with your hair?

FUCK YA

14. Do you believe in luck and miracles?

Yeah budddyy

15. What good thing happened this summer?

Idk, my bday party was lit?? And lots of river floats happened

16. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

Lol

17. Do you think there is life on other planets?

Cant deny that there isn’t so yaaa

18. Do you still talk to your first crush?

No

19. Do you like bubble baths?

Yes

20. Do you like your neighbors?

Just moved, so don’t know em

21. What are you bad habits?

Procrastination lol and biting my nails

22. Where would you like to travel?

Literally ANNNYY-fuckin-WHERE!

23. Do you have trust issues?

Hmm I wanna say generally no, but I also always keep it one hunnnid with myself, and as much as I’d like to say I don’t have any - I think I def have insecurities with myself, that have the potential to become “trust issues” in certain relationships, but overall no. I live by the whole “you have my trust til you fuck it up” mantra

24. Favorite part of your daily routine?

Coffee in the morning lately, missed it and forgot how energized it makes me - gives me time to wake up and reflect/set daily goals

25. What part of your body are you most uncomfortable with?

Stomach forever :((((

26. What do you do when you wake up?

Scroll on my phone, pee usually, or feed my cat lol

27. Do you wish your skin was lighter or darker?

Tanner maybe?

28. Who are you most comfortable around?

My mom or my best friend R’Bonney - but any of my close friends and fam honestly

29. Have any of your ex’s told you they regret breaking up?

Not directly

30. Do you ever want to get married?

Lol ok, so this is always changing…but lately (and by lately I mean the past few years) its been a no. I’m open minded though and am aware that I’m always changing my mind sooo who knows

31. Is your hair long enough for a pony tail?

yeppperoo

32. Which celebrities would you have a threesome with?

Honestly, those aren’t my “thing” lollike id prob laugh or be awkward or just have to be hellllla drunk - but like I wouldn’t mind Jason Momoa and Tom Hardy tossin me around

33. Spell your name with your chin.

hjaylkee

34. Do you play sports? What sports?

Scocer back in the day - actually went and kicked it like a week ago for the first time in YEARSSSS - felt so damn good

35. Would you rather live without TV or music?

TV, music forreeevverrr

36. Have you ever liked someone and never told them?

Lol story of my life

37. What do you say during awkward silences?

“Soooo” then probably ask a question or some shit lol

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

Hmmm…definitely have to be funny/have a good sense of humor. They’d have to be open-minded for sure. Up for trying new things, places, cultures, food, music, etc. Just have an adventurous spirit I guess when it comes to that. Have a good line of communication/openness - and just be able to have a deep/intellectual convo about anything and everything. Bonuses: taller than me, likes cooking, and going to music shows.

39. What are your favorite stores to shop in?

Amazon lol I hate shopping

40. What do you want to do after high school?

To go back to high school :( lmao so much id re-do, cant believe its almost been a decade

41. Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?

Hell yeah, this is life my dudes, dont take it so seriously - we all fuck up at some point or another

42. If your being extremely quiet what does it mean?

Something is on my mind for sure, or im just tired lol

43. Do you smile at strangers?

Yeah

44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?

DAMNNN WHAT so hard - I guesss if I had to pick, space…just because it’s more rare/harder to do I’d think.

45. What makes you get out of bed in the morning?

My cat lol with his meowing ass

46. What are you paranoid about?

Lowkey a lot lol

47. Have you ever been high?

8)

48. Have you ever been drunk?

Who hasn’t????

49. Have you done anything recently that you hope nobody finds out about?

naw

50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?

Black probably, like half my wardrobe

51. Ever wished you were someone else?

Of course

52. One thing you wish you could change about yourself?

My bad habits

56. Favourite colour?

Yelllllow :)

57. Favourite food?

Oh gaaawwd, literally anything - lately: PB&J’s, fries, wings, Mediterranean, Mexican, pickles, ice cream, ramenzzzz

58. Last thing you ate?

Pistachios

59. First thing you ate this morning?

Cofffeeee w creamer

60. Ever won a competition? For what?

Idk, not off the top of my head - maybe something back in elementary

61. Been suspended/expelled? For what?

Nah

62. Been arrested? For what?

Yeah lmao

63. Ever been in love?

Yes

64. Tell us the story of your first kiss?

No its really not that interesting and idc to type it out

65. Are you hungry right now?

24/7/365

66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?

Lol yes a few of them <333

67. Facebook or Twitter?

FB

68. Twitter or Tumblr?

Tumblr

69. Are you watching tv right now?

Noooo

70. Names of your bestfriends?

R’Bonney is number 1

71. Craving something? What?

Foooood, and companionship? Lol

72. What colour are your towels?

Idk, random, mostly blue

72. How many pillows do you sleep with?

A lot lol

73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?

Lol no, but I have my one from my childhood in my room

74. How many stuffed animals do you think you have?

1 - shout out to you Mr.Fluffy

75. Favourite animal?

I am fascinated by sharks; and like gators/crocs. But I have mad respect for elephants, they’re sooo damn smart and beautiful.

76. What colour is your underwear?

Dont have any on

77. Chocolate or Vanilla?

BITCHHHH CHOC

78. Favourite ice cream flavour?

All of them

79. What colour shirt are you wearing?

Tie-dye

80. What colour pants?

none

81. Favourite tv show?

Game of Thrones prob

82. Favourite movie?

Avatar or Shawshank Redemption

87. First person you talked to today?

Sissy

88. Last person you talked to today?

Friend on FT

89. Name a person you hate?

No one, maybe Trump? lol

90. Name a person you love?

Everyone, fr fr

91. Is there anyone you want to punch in the face right now?

Nah

92. In a fight with someone?

Nah

93. How many sweatpants do you have?

Not enough <3

94. How many sweaters/hoodies do you have?

Not enough <3

95. Last movie you watched?

The Decline on Netflix, short lil foreign oil, was deep/interesting

96. Favourite actress?

Not sure-Sandra Bullock? Or Meryl

97. Favourite actor?

Denzel or Morgan Freeman

98. Do you tan a lot?

Nah not anymore honestly

99. Have any pets?

Yessss

100. How are you feeling?

Mediocre

101. Do you type fast?

Ya

102. Do you regret anything from your past?

Im sure

103. Can you spell well?

Ya

104. Do you miss anyone from your past?

Lol im nostalgic af, so yes

105. Ever been to a bonfire party?

Yes litttty tittyyy

106. Ever broken someone’s heart?

Probably :(

107. Have you ever been on a horse?

Hell yeah brother, I’m from TX

108. What should you be doing?

So much shit lol

109. Is something irritating you right now?

The fact that I ain’t doing all the shit I should be lol

110. Have you ever liked someone so much it hurt?

Yooo yes

112. Who was the last person you cried in front of?

Prob my sister or my mom?? Lol I cry a lot, idk and idc

113. What was your childhood nickname?

Hayls?

114. Have you ever been out of your province/state?

Yes

115. Do you play the Wii?

Back in the day

116. Are you listening to music right now?

Surprisingly, no

117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?

Nah, unless maybe if its homemade

118. Do you like Chinese food?

Yeah occasionally, more of a Thai food chick or Japanese

119. Favourite book?

Kite Runner

120. Are you afraid of the dark?

Low-key sometimes lol

121. Are you mean?

Hell noooo

122. Is cheating ever okay?

Ok, this is an interesting one lol I mean no, it’s not “okay” - since it usually constitutes lying/hiding/hurting someone - BUTTTT, for a lack of a better term - I wanna say it’s “normal”? But thats because I, personally, am on the fence about the concept of monogamy. Like no, I’ve never cheated nor experienced that in return - but the whole concept of monogamy and like that a person can love and only love or be with one person is WILLLLDDD and I can’t help but note that its a social construct that we, as a society, are conditioned to from the time we are born. Idk if that makes sense bc im high af lol but those are my thoughts…like to sum it up - cheating is fucked up and sucks, but at the same time its not all that surprising/shocking anymore, like borderline “normalized” just as divorces are and shit, so I feel like bc biologically we aren’t made to be with one person lol. I don’t condone it tho. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.

123. Can you keep white shoes clean?

Hell to the naw naw

124. Do you believe in love at first sight?

Hmmm idk about that one, but also can’t deny it

125. Do you believe in true love?

Yeah of course, you’re talking to a hopeless romantic

126. Are you currently bored?

I guess we could say that

127. What makes you happy?

Food and close, loved ones

128. Would you change your name?

Nah, too much paper work

129. What your zodiac sign?

Cancer, with my lil moody, sensitive ass

130. Do you like subway?

I did lol

131. Your bestfriend of the opposite sex likes you, what do you do?

Story of my mf life lol literally all my exes are “best friends turned lovers” situation, so guess it would just depend lmao

132. Who’s the last person you had a deep conversation with?

133. Favourite lyrics right now?

Lol oh godddd; ok off the top of my head - Tupac - Keep Ya Head Up is what comes to mind; just a timeless song and the lyrics are still relevant/apply to this day and idk just really resonate with the message behind that song <3

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

Idk, but it was probably SO dumb, and told to my parents lol

136. Do you sleep with your doors open or closed?

Either or, lately open so my cat can go in and out lol

137. How tall are you?

5’6 mayyybeee 5’5 actually lol

140. Summer or Winter?

Fall!!

141. Night or Day?

Def a lil night owl, always have been

142. Favourite month?

April and October for weather at least

143. Are you a vegetarian?

No but I try, and go through phases, I’m definitely mindful the older I get and more focused on my health I become

144. Dark, milk or white chocolate?

FUCKIN ALLLLL

145. Tea or Coffee?

Coffee but I like tea too, just seem to drink coffee more regularly

146. Was today a good day?

The grateful-to-just-be-alive in me wants to say yes lol but idk, felt off/unaccomplished and cried a lot, so no.

147. Mars or Snickers?

Snickers

148. What’s your favourite quote?

“This too shall pass”

149. Do you believe in ghosts?

Sure why not

150. Get the closest book next to you, open it to page 42, what’s the first line on that page?

“After all, what he had always wanted was just that: to know new places.” -The Alchemist, Paulo Coelho

[revol-lover]

dreams don’t end at “30″

so i just had a little breakthrough and maybe this wont sound like anything to anyone else but i just have to share it

so i’ve talked about this before. about how my friend and i were both planning these personal development like goals for this year that covid got in the way of. and he said something, about how this is his last year in his 20s and he wanted to get some goals accomplished before 30 

and i thought about that and realized something.

i have been feeling similarly about a few goals that i’ve been hanging onto for years and years. like i’m going to be honest with you, some people might remember this if you’ve been around here for a long time but probably not. anyway when i was in high school i really wanted to make music, sing, learn an instrument. and i did make some covers that i posted on myspace (showing my age here lol) and youtube but then i kind of gave up on it when

 1) became 18 and realized my dream to go to NYC and pursue music when i was 18 wasn’t happening because of a million reasons (it was very much a pipe dream, right? i mean you can’t have that dream and not prepare for it and i didnt. also i was too scared at the time to even move out to my own place if i had the funds to do so because my parents wouldnt have really approved and i was still so under their thumb) 

2) broke up with my musician boyfriend. which needed to happen. but he was the only person super passionate about that kind of goal at the time around me (till he ran lol)  and he actually is still doing music now so good for him but basically 

because of those 2 reasons i just let go of that dream all together as something i thought i wanted to do but was “unrealistic”.

but the thing about turning 30 and feelings like you needed to achieve all these personal/dreamy/goals in your 20s. what is that bullshit? why? 

what changes when you cross over to 30? i’ll tell you one thing. media pushes movies, books, films, everything about people chasing their dreams in their 20s and “settling” down in their 30s. where’s my inspiring movie about the 32 year old mom who finally wrote a song and performed it live after being terrified her whole life of doing so?

 think about it though

in your 30s you. *might* have a better paying job than you did in your 20s. which means, if you can manage to find time or a way for it, you *might* be able to save a little more money or afford to do something like, buy that guitar and guitar lessons in order to learn to play and write a song and live out your dream in some way, even if its just learning to play so you can play at an open mic. and maybe you’ll like that and you’ll somehow connect with likeminded people and form a band. idk. your dreams dont have to end in your 20s. 

you dont have to fall into the trap of your 20s are for your dreams that are so big you feel like the chance of achieving them is getting struck by lightening

and then your 30s are for fancy adult goals like buying a house, and going on a $10k vacation and those things are probably just as hard as the goals you had in your 20s but the world wont make you see it that way. its seen as “selfish” to prioritize and budget for your artistic goals - but not a house. no that’s responsible and what you “should” do. but its ok to prioritize something that’s going to give your soul fulfillment too! we need to believe that! because it’s true. we are not here just to work our jobs and live mundane colorless lives once we aren’t considered “young” anymore (but 30s are still young. not what i’m saying)

 you’re always going to be chasing something big and if you let the world control what that thing is you’re always going to be on some rat race. 

it’s fine if you achieve your goals in a different order than the world says you were supposed to. i got married young and had a child young, that was how my life played out and i’m happy with that because, yes, finding love and becoming a mother very much were goals of mine.

yes i dropped out of college because i couldn’t afford it and i couldnt find a major that felt worth being in debt for. and also, because hey guess what? contrary to what a lot of people will try to lead you to believe, college is not for everyone. and college does not = success. college drop out does not = failure. it’s just an option of something you could do with your life. AND if you didn’t go to your college in your 20s it doesnt mean you can’t in your 30s. or 50s. hell my husband, who did go to college saw elderly (think, 80s!) people going to his college as students! college isn’t just for 18 year olds fresh out of high school. 

My 27th birthday is in 2 weeks and no, i have not yet to worked up the courage to write an original song from words to music, or have the courage to get on a stage and sing anything, or talk to a stranger, or publish any of my writing or art, goals i’ve had whirling around in my brain since I was 18, but, it’s going to happen. maybe this year. maybe when i’m 35, but it’s going to happen. a number is not going to be the thing holding me back.

that whole mentality of “my youth is slipping away i need to achieve all these dreams before midnight the day of my 30th birthday” is so stupid and flawed and we all deserve to see ourselves, and our individual potential as more than that. 

last part of this rant - one of the reason i even became so passionate about reignighting some of my dusty, old goals, that it turned out, i still cared about, is because i had a moment where i was like

ok i am a mom. i am someones mom. how will my daughter see me, as a person, not just her mom? 

kevin and i always talk about how between the two of us we’ve both had a lot of quintessential young adult experiences that we look forward to sharing with her. like, quitting jobs, getting in car accidents, that one time i unknowingly participated in an illegal bonfire and ran from the cops then lied straight to their faces and somehow got away with it (literally my ONE act of teen rebellion), changing college majors like 3 years in (kevin), failed classes, tried cigarettes, etc like i’m ready, and hope that one day she will feel comfortable talking to us about things because we’ve been through things and have a lot of input and two different perspectives to offer

but further than that, i realized that i want her to know that her mom is a person too. i want her to know that mom is also passionate about writing, and music, and somehow tackled some of her goals in regards to that so that SHE can feel that SHE, too can do those things. and i know that, that is in part how it works 

because,

my dad IS an artist. my dad IS a musician. yall. my dad is SO talented.  my dad is brilliant. besides his artistic abilities which include, drawing literal realistic as fuck portraits, sculpting, painting, playing guitar, bass, piano, mandolin, he also knows music composition, etc etc etc beyond all of that, he also taught himself fucking PLUMBING and ELECTRICIAN SHIT to fix things in our house growing up. like he bought a book. and taught himself. my dad. i grew up thinking that was normal but i realized not everyones dad can just tear down the bathroom and rebuild it from scratch down to the plumbing without being a licensed professional.

but anyway the point is - as talented as my dad is, he doesnt really pursue his artistic dreams much. and its sad. i’m glad that i’ve seen some of the work he did when he was younger. i’m glad that if i bring it up, he’ll show me something he can do. but he doesnt pursue it anymore really. my dad works an exhausting physical labor job but even he, as a 50something year old has fallen into that trap of like, i dont have time to draw, but he will scroll his phone and read articles for hours and i’m not shaming him. i’m just saying we all have this problem in the modern era of technology and social media and what not (hell i am writing a post on tumblr instead of my book right now).

but if timing was different and my dad grew up in a different time, where lets say something distracted him from doing the little bit of art and music that he did when i was a kid that i was able to witness, if i hadnt seen that. i wouldnt know that.. in a way.. that’s in me. i mean, he’s my dad. if my dad could pick up a craft and work at it to be good at it, why can’t i? there are so many musicians and (kind unrelated but not rly - i think being “self made” is an art) business owners in my family. there’s either some common thread in our genetics ORRRRRRRRRR just growing up around people working at and succeeding at those kinds of goals shows you that it CAN be done so you’re more likely to believe in your abilities

and i want that for my daughter. because even as an almost 3 year old i can see that she has a gift for music, and reading. and even if i’m wrong about that and she grows up wanting to do some other thing as a job or hobby, i want her to know, by seeing her mom do it, that she can achieve anything she puts her heart to. you don’t have to box yourself in because of your age or your sex or the fact that you’re a parent. 

and your dream doesnt have to become your career. it can be a hobby and still be fulfilling. like yes, 18 year old me dreamed about some life in nyc singing in clubs or bars or whatever and being ~famous (lol) and that did not happen, but i can still get out there and play open mic downtown and get that love of music, and desire to face my fear of performing out of my system. maybe i’ll love it. maybe i’ll hate it. but i’ll have done it. and that’s the ultimate goal. 

sorry i went off but i had to get that out of my system and i’m very passionate about 

[cancerbiophd]

Hi Julia! Sorry if this seems like a lot, but I hope you don't mind me asking. To contextualize: I’m about to graduate with a BA in Bio! I was initially pre-med for ~3 years of undergrad, but I realized I didn't have a strong interest in being an MD. Bc of multiple reasons (in part, a lot of anxiety), I hadn't gotten much extracurricular/lab experience in that time. After tons of (painful :() introspection, I want to go for a grad program after my gap year - (1/3)

but I wasn’t able to get into a lab this year (bc 4th yr, yk? :(). The most “lab” experience I’d gotten was taking some upper level Bio classes. I’m worried about my chances of even landing a lab tech (or related) position to get experience before the next application cycle. I could take multiple gap years, but I’m not sure if I’ll have stable housing or be able to find a job in my hometown. If it’s worth mentioning, I’ve been a TA for a lab course, done some work as a grader, and have GREATLY improved my grades, but compared to my peers it feels like… not much. The profs I’m close with seem to think I’ll still be just fine, but people advise doing much more than I did (which is completely understandable). I guess I’m just stuck and frustrated w/ myself that I hadn’t done anything sooner. Do you have any advice on how to move from here? Thank you so much! 

Hi anon!!! 

Firstly, I want to congratulate you on graduating!!! (they really should just combine the words and make it “Congraduations!” lol anyway) no but seriously, you got a BA to your name now!! Feels good yall. 

Secondly, I was in the same! exact! boat! omg. you sure you’re not me from like 8 years ago? Because I also went into undergrad focused on pre-med, decided nope not for me, realized I wanted to go into grad school, but didn’t have a lot of lab experience (bc I had no idea where to start or what to do). I managed to squeeze in 1 semester of volunteering in a lab before graduating, but I knew that really wasn’t enough. It then took me 5 tedious months of searching before I landed a lab tech job that gave me the experience I needed (and also guided me towards my current field of cancer bio). 

Just like you I was super bummed that I didn’t discover sooner in my college career what the right path was, but I was elated that I at least did discover the right path. What’s that one saying... the best time to plant a tree was 10 years ago; the next best time to plant a tree is today. So take a deep breath, get back up, and tell that little voice in your head that you don’t have the time and energy to feel frustrated because this is the beginning of a new chapter, and you are gonna work hard for it, starting today! 

Keep up the search for an entry-level position at a research lab (such as a lab tech). Along with checking the regular job posting sites (like Craigslist and Monster), also look for temp agencies, and seek out newly established labs (eg. PIs who just moved to your local research univ– they’ll be needing a lab tech real bad and they probably have boat-loads of money as a new recruit. That’s how I found my lab tech job). 

Here’s a post I made regarding cold-emailing PIs to see if they’re hiring (and not all of them post positions online; sometimes they find the person they want to hire first, and then post the position to make it official with the university. Something to keep in mind!)

Here’s a masterpost of links to job websites specifically for scientists (hopefully the links still work; I haven’t checked in a while)

Another option, if you’re up for it, could be to move to a different location that would have more job opportunities for your field. For example, Seattle and California are some hotspots for biotech. Recently there was one cancer immunotherapy start-up in Seattle that was hiring 50 scientist positions at once. Check out Boston University’s Biomedical Workforce Data Report to see where the potential hotspots are in the US.

You can also acquire other related non-lab (but still paid) experiences, such as becoming a biology tutor and freelance science writer. 

Utilize your network. Ask your friends, family, past professors, college alumni, etc if they know of anyone working at a place that could hire you. Someone could know someone who knows someone! Before I landed my lab tech job, a friend of a friend of my mom’s had offered me an internship position at her research institution in Florida. 

If your goal is a PhD, you can consider doing a Masters first to gain more experience. I know many colleagues in the life sciences who did a Masters first as a “stepping stone” towards their PhD, and typically Masters programs are more lenient on requiring lots of lab experience. I have a post here about the pros and cons of doing a Masters before a PhD (US centric). 

Other things that can ramp up your application include acing the GRE (general) and GRE Biology Subject Test (if that’s the grad field you want to pursue). I know of one student in our pharmacology/toxicology PhD program who had very little lab experience but still got in because one PI in particular was super impressed with his perfect GRE score. Some really amazing letters of rec and a killer personal statement will also help.

I hope that helps a bit. I’m always here to chat if you have other questions or just need someone :) I’ve definitely been in your same exact boat, so I know what you’re going through. It wasn’t easy or fun in the slightest bit, but I got through it, and I know you can too

[camcantarella]

20 Questions Tag Game - Writers Edition

I was tagged by the ever so amazing @alanakusumastan. Thanks Julia! 💗💗💗 (this is really late lol I kept forgetting about it in my drafts)

Respond to the following writing questions and tag me in your response! I look forward to hearing your answers as I’ve always been curious about these!

1) When/what age did you start writing?

I started writing during the twitter fic era! What was the actual name of that site? It was an extension (basically) of twitter. Not twitlonger but? idk I dont remember lol

2) What inspired you to start?

I was in my Justin Bieber phase and saw a bunch of people writing fics about him on that site and decided to give it a shot lol

3) Where and when does inspiration usually strike you?

Watching a lifetime movie, sleeping, seeing a picture, my nonexistent love life, etc lol so like literally anything

4) Where and when do you usually write? Morning? Late at night? On the bus? In bed?

At night, but like early early in the morning is when I write my best content! So like 1-4 am I can write an AMAZING fluff piece.

5) Do you listen to music while writing? If so, what genre/playlist?

ALWAYS. I don’t think I can actually write without it? I create a playlist for every fic occasion. Each song is usually a love song but t create my playlists according to the vibe. Like if it was created as a love song but if I find a slow, slightly creepy cover of it you better believe it’s going into my stalker fic playlists

6) Which category do you like best? Angst? Fluff? NSFW? Other?

FLUFF. It’s the easiest thing for me to write despite the fact that I’m 100% inexperienced in the subject lmao

7) Which category do you find most challenging to write?

Angst, okay wait no... NSFW. Definitely. Like I can write a fight scene and “kill” my fave OC, but sex? How does one even gain enough courage or words to write that??? (big props to nsfw writers like i have so much respect for yall)

8) If you had to pick your favorite Choices book, which one would it be and why?

Um.... I have no idea honestly? I’m pretty neutral to all the books at this point. But I’ll always be a sucker for ILITW bc I was proven wrong in canon about some aspects of the book and i eat that kind of thing up. I love being proven wrong! Sometimes.

9) If your Choices LIs were real, which one (and only one) would you personally want to be with?

Well shit lol um irl I’d probs say Liam bc hot af, royal af, sweet af, generous af, protective af, lovable af

10) Do you share any physical characteristics with your Choices MCs? Pics/Selfies optional 😊

Nope! none. um... dark hair?

11) Which MC do you share the most personality traits with?

None, not really. Like... I’d say TF mc but I’m not much of a fan of her so like lol no

12) Which Choices character do you feel you have the best grasp of in terms of personality?

I’d probs say Flynn but I’m not totally sure until I try to write him. Or Liam bc I feel like in some aspects I AM Liam

13) What’s your favorite Choices pairing to write for?

I don’t write for any actual choices pairings! In each of the 2 fics I’m working on I’m pairing canon characters with original characters

14) What is a pairing(s) you hope to start writing for?

I’d like to FINALLY write flynn x mc. ALSO. my oc Kaden Cantarella (he’s set in the VOS universe) with ya know... me lol bc I’m in love with him

15) What do you hope to improve in your writing?

I need to be a lot more descriptive. I’m not good with like proper use of adjectives or anything. Like in chapter 1 of my stalker grant fic I said that grant threw a picture frame at Walsh. But I didn’t explain what had actually happened ya know, so like initially it wasn’t clear whether Walsh had actually been hit or where grant threw it, stuff like that.

16) Any pet peeves related to writing?

Everything, like I like writing, but I hate writing. Does that even make sense?

17) Are you inspired by any IRL experiences when you write? Care to share?

YES!!! Back in the marrish fandom sometimes I used to write based on things that had actually happened in my life or things I’d witnessed. Or like I’d take little bits of myself and insert them into the OCs

18) Is there any particular piece of work you consider to be your ultimate writing goal? Something so amazing you hope one day you’ll be up to that standard?

Ugh my unpublished, unnamed royal marrish au. I didn’t finish that one but it was coming along amaaaaazing. Also Thinking Out Loud (also marrish bc all my fics outside of this fandom have been marrish), like that was the first fic I wrote that I LOVED. I’d never liked my writing before then (still dont, not really, but I do it anyway)

19) Did/do you write for any other fandoms? If so which ones?

marrish!! (teen wolf, who?) once i feel comfortable enough with my writing again I’m gonna finish all those unpublished fics I was working on before my extreme case writer’s block started early last year (literally couldn’t write a paragraph again til a couple months ago)

20) In your spare time (when you’re not writing) what other hobbies do you pursue?

what even are hobbies anymore. All I’ve been doing lately has been fighting off anxiety attacks. um I love discovering new music though like that’s always been a fave!! oh and shipping myself with people I have no chance with lol that’s always fun

Tagging: okay so tbh idk about [m]any writers in this fandom and anyone I’m following has probs already been tagged so if you’re a writer and havent been yet, consider this official notice of me tagging you! 💗

[diariesof-kg]

Listen Linda!

08_15_21

I am excited!!  My VH1 credit should be on my IMDB page real soon.  Pause why Black Panther is filming in ATL and I never knew when they started filming.  I definitely need an agent in ATL, I have the financial ability to fly back and forth.  I just don’t know if I am willing to shave my head.  Even if they offered me 500k, I’d still be hesitant. Lol.  And they are filming in the middle of fall and winter and I can’t stand being cold.  God is good!  I am unsure what to do with my health though.  Again, I’ve come to terms years ago, about what could possibly happen.  I bet ol girl would be happy if I perished, she wished it on me anyway. Lol, But that besides the point at hand.  Something is definitely wrong with my body and I am beyond over it.  Thank God for life insurance I guess.  I barely have debts except for my school loans.  I wrote out my goals, I just need to make a vision board at this point.  I am definitely hoping everything manifests.  I’ll be debt free by December of this year.  And then my credit score should be above average and then I figured out how to get a Tesla without spending 40k.  The most I am willing to spend is 30k but that’s where negotiating comes in.  Unless the car goes over 300 miles per charge, I am not spending that much.  I’ve driven a Tesla. Model S and the charge goes down quick with all the usage.  I want a model S so bad, but Ill take the Model 3 or Y. 

My child got out twice now.  I told her the outside is for the street cats and she’s not about that life, of course she responds. Lol.  I am definitely blessed for her.  Who would have thought I’d have a cat that responds and talks to me.  Understands commands.  It’s beyond crazy sometimes but I am grateful.  I remember after the incident I was crying so bad and Zena was trying to get in my lap but I kept putting her on the floor.  I feel so bad she waned to comfort me and I rejected it.  But I truly love her to death.  I bought her a leash to train her to go outside but she isn’t having it, but then yells at me to put it on.  I guess she runs everything.  She also loves helping the clients.  Lol.  Whether that’s talking while I’m on the phone or typing random shit from the keyboard.  

I finally broke my silence.  Not entirely.  I’m still hesitant about reaching out to my community about what happened to me.  I told one person in the industry and I said, it’s not about exploiting or exposing but it’s about safety.  If I was attacked I am sure it’ll happen to someone else and that’s the point of speaking on it.  I would be in the wrong if it was lies and I made up this whole story for revenge, but unfortunately it really happened.  I have the court documents saved as PDF and people can look it up with my name or the case number.  This is why I am blessed my record is clean.  Because on my IMDB, it shows if the industry is googling you or reviewing your page.  And if I had a criminal or something as a restraining order on my record, I could lose out on bookings.  Reputation matters.  Producers always call me back for a gig.  And no one wants to work with someone who can’t control their anger.  Thank God that isn’t me.  I can be upset, but I’d NEVER put my hands let alone bite someone.  I am hesitant about posting pictures of the bite, but I feel like that’s my finally closure.  Closure and forgiveness is a beautiful thing.  I think that’s how I am able to receive all these blessings.  I always forgive people in order to set myself free.  The misery I would feel if I didn’t. 

*side note; I am craving Prank’s Egg white omelette and potatoes. ; with some syrup.  I am not sure when I’ll make it over there but it’ll be soon.  Most places don’t even do egg white omelette which too me isn’t as dry as a regular omelette. It’s like being in love with the first bite, it’s so good. 

Imagine on my birthday a Tesla arrives.  Yall I’d pass out.  Lol.  I definitely want that car and then I’ll get a townhouse.  The way they check your credit though itll be tricky I suppose.  And of course mom can rent out my room.  This room is beyond 600 sq ft.  Its a whole ass studio.  Matter fact if she takes the entertainment room, where my sister sleeps and my room and the bathroom, that’s a steal.  I have been looking for townhouses to rent but some are two bedrooms and are tiny.  And I am spoiled to be honest.  I refuse to live in a box.  Which means paying over 2k a month.  But that’s the whole point of upgrading your life.  I will never forget when I met my brother for the first time and he said I was boujie because I had a Champion jacket on. Lol, SMH!  What’s so wrong with upgrading your life.  Phew, black people never can just say something is cute or looks good without the extras.  The Champion jacket was hella expensive and I bought it on my credit card, because I was broke.  I like the color and how it looked. Lol, never knew it would categorize me as boujie.  

That’s why lowkey I am scared to get the Tesla.  Because when next year comes around and I FINALLY heal and get myself right to date.  I don’t want to go out on a date and they think, because I have a Tesla I got monies.  I was ignorant for that too.  My ex has a big ass house and a Mercedes and I quickly learned it wasn’t even like that.  Plus a Mercedes is really an expensive Chrysler, both vehicles share the same interior, but who gon tell them?  Can we just clap for people who upgrade their lives.  Can we do that starting 2022.  My plan is at the end of this year to finish doing overtime and then grab my savings and get a loan, hopefully at least 20k and I pay the rest like 10-15k.  And BOOM a Tesla is born.  I am always planning, I created a whole financial excel sheet to predict how much I need to make to reach my goals.  Then I have my Godson and his future.  I may go ahead and put 5k in his savings just to set him in stone for the next two years.  I am waiting for my credit card to say zero!  If I have extra I might send my friends a couple racks.  When I am blessed I have to pass the blessings to the next.

I love the BUFFINS!!!  I just can’t over how beautiful their lives are.  Sevyn wanted Annie and she got her.  They proposed and got married and three years later had their first child and I am just so happy for them.  I am like this, let me re-manifest someone from the ATL.  Because my homeboy literally is moving to be with his fiance after meeting her a short time and he’s a Capricorn.  Listen, I was so close but I ended up getting violated violently, so lets start over.  Caps are so loyal and faithful.  But I am not ready to find someone yet.  I kind of want to establish a few things first.  I want to HEAL.  This was definitely a traumatizing experience.  Adding more to my PTSD.  I want to be comfortable speaking about it if asked.  There is a lot to work on at this time.  Plus, I want to get this car and this townhouse.  Also, I don’t want to be afraid to jump into the deep end.  Like when I fall in love again, I dont want to be hesitant to make someone my girlfriend, even if it’s a short period of time.  I don’t want to rush but I don’t want to hold back my emotions either.  I pray I can fall in love again.  I honestly do.  I thought I couldn’t and then I did to a person who attacked me.  Feels wasted.  I want to take chances.  I should have taken that second date with this other girl. Lol, fuck !  And I wouldn’t have been in this mess.  

To end this, I know relationships are not easy, I was in one for five years.  I have the strength but also, I don’t have to tolerate shit.  If the universe sends me a damn Taurus, we going straight to counseling, because I refuse.  Lol, they are literally all abusive asf.  In the meantime, I am waiting for the victims group to get back to me about my case.  If they agree, somebody going to jail and it’s not me.  I mean literally what happened to my bff ex, lordt.  we call her crazy bish, but she was mad she was arrested for the DV.  Like how can people be upset about their own actions that they chose.  Now you see why, when my bff asked if she was a Taurus and she said yes, why they were scared for me.  Lol, because them May Taurus are real life abusers.  Someone prove me wrong and Ill give them 10k.  But on a good note.  God is good!!!!!

[youngk]

my experience at DAY6 Live & Meet in NA- NYC

Ok so up until I got to the venue, things were pretty bad. I was already running late cause of my exam, which is why I ended up switching my benefits, so  I went home to fix my make up but was in a rush that yo girl completely forgot her freaking eyebrows lolol so i was freaking out cause i’m meeting the loves of my life and i can’t show them eyebrow-less liz but there are stores everywhere in the city that i just quickly purchased something and ran to the venue in the disgusting, humid rainy weather where, clearly, non- new yorkers were walking like turtles but luckily i got to the venue about 10 minutes before the show started.. thank God

(warning: long and jargon)

so Dowoon was the first to come out and he was all shy and smiles, and then wonpil came out in a suit and i was telling myself that i didn’t like where this was going and then freaking YOUNG K COMES OUT WITH A LOOSE TIE and by then, i’m pretty much only staring at him cause i’m in awe of his beauty once again that i didn’t even realize sungjin and jae came out.  The first song was I Wait & not even 5 minutes into the start of the show, this is what i get at the end of the song THE FIRST FREAKING SONG 

so i’m pretty much dead and then they performed Hunt next so about halfway into the song, I lift my cheap sign, with black ink cause this girl cannot afford color ink, which read “나 DAY6 음악 매일 듣고 YOUNG K 라는 가수 많이 좋아해" (”I listen to DAY6 everyday, I like a singer named Young K a lot” – in reference to this) and yo girl was looking at him and he saw my sign AND READ IT AND THEN MADE EYE CONTACT WITH ME AND SMILED LIKE dsjfksldjf this lasted almost 10 seconds

I WAS LITERALLY SCREAMING INSIDE BUT I SMILED BACK AT HIM AND YALL, WE HAD OUR MOMENT!! BUT LOWKEY, I WANTED TO ACTUALLY CRY AND LOOK AWAY BECAUSE I GOT SO SHY HAHAHA and so yeah, i’m pretty much dead only six minutes into the show but boy did this again towards the end of the show (which i didn’t catch on video) when i raised my sign during I Smile and he made eye contact with me again and kept smiling so i’m dead once again…………. 

some highlights during the q&a that i found cute: (i was mainly focused on youngfeel cause i was on their side and was deprived of young k when i went to their concert this past summer)  - young k saying “you guys (My Days) are adorable" WHEN HE’S REALLY THE ADORABLE ONE  - jae singing sunday morning  - young k stomping his feet like 3 times and being extra cute af and jumping up from his chair  - youngfeel hitting each other and young k telling wonpil to calm down  - young k forcing collapsedone to get up from his seat during the preference game - sungjin’s confidence when he speaks - dowoon saying he wants to be able to talk to a bear and sungjin imitates one  as always, their vocals were amazing and beautiful but i couldn’t really hear that well since so many people were screaming, but i’m glad we did since Young K said he was worried that NA My Days wouldn’t applaud them or be able to sing the lyrics but he said he was wrong, and the way jae said "beautiful" so sweetly when we sang his first verse in congratulations, and then Young K getting teary eyed by the end of I Smile.. everything was great  and during the “encore”,  Jae literally stood on the chair in the row behind mine and then stopped right in front of me to jump so girl’s gotta do what she gotta do and i jumped with him and now i’m still sore af. BUT AFTER BEING A FAN OF JAE FOR ALMOST 7 YEARS, AND SEEING HIM DEBUT AND ACCOMPLISH GOALS AND NOW COME TO PERFORM AT HIS HOMETOWN AS WELL AS MY HOMETOWN KSJF I SAY THIS ALL THE TIME BUT I REALLY AM A PROUD MAMA. After the show, I went up the stairs for hi-touch and I was so nervous and when I went up the stairs, Young K was first and I’m dead serious, he looked exactly like this ………… 

and i was honestly so intimidated cause he looks so .. fierce (? idk if that’s the appropriate word) and he was waiting because I had to walk up to the table they were behind and let’s be real, he does give off that cold vibe at first but anyways, i began walking up to him and his face suddenly brightened up like he remembered my sign or something and was smiling and leaned forward and looked me in the eyes while he was holding my hand with his hand WHICH IS ACTUALLY SO WARM, SMOL, AND SOFT LIKE WHAT THE …. I WAS DECEIVED BY THOSE PICTURES (but i’m still a hand stan) and he told me “thank you for coming” and tbh i don’t remember what i said to him but i think i told him “thank you so much, i love you” but idk why i said that when i had something else in mind and was planning on speaking to him in konglish but he didn’t let go or look away and actually didn’t let go till he gave YOU the chance to speak but honestly, i remember my moments with the other members but with young k, everything is such a blur. i was THAT nervous and just couldn’t make eye contact without wanting to look away cause he was THAT BEAUTIFUL AND SO SWEET lol and he said he got chubby but IF HE IS CHUBBY, IDK WHAT I AM CAUSE HIS FACE WAS LITERALLY THE SIZE OF MY FIST ……..  then I moved onto Dowoon and he just bowed slightly but I told him “수고했어요" (you worked hard) and moved on but he turned around to look at me again so I turned back and he said “huh? 오~” and smiled like he was so taken aback that I spoke Korean. Jae was next, ok i’m not that short or tall but i realized this before but jae is actually not as tall as i expected and he was so chill about it like he just grabbed my hand and held it almost as if i was his bro and said “thank you for coming” and my dumbass self just repeated him ……. so I moved onto Wonpil and told him “수고했어요" as well and he said “아! 감사합니다~!” in that dragged out adorable tone he uses all the time, and then I moved onto Sungjin and just as I remembered, his not so tall yet nicely built physique and his BEAUTIFUL EYES … I told him “수고했어요" as well and he made that usual face he makes when he’s thinking about something and said “오~~”, bowed, and smiled.  SO OVERALL, it was such an unforgettable memory and i’m honestly so proud of how far they’ve come, and am also so thankful that I get to listen to and support such beautiful and humble artists, and am also happy that I get to be in such a beautiful fandom who follow their artists and are also good singers, whether you’re in Korea or one of Jae’s kids overseas.  and if you read all of this, i’m sorry i wasted your time BUT I JUST LOVE YALL MY DAYS AND DAY6 OK GOODBYE  (Btw I took a few mainly Young K focused fancams that you can check out on my youtube if you want. )

[celestialallstars]

Episode #6: “Can i PLEASE get a blindside.” - Jared

ok so basically the game has been sooo quiet and ive like.  felt dead. idk. i had a breakdown last night bc of it and i cried on my couch (KNOW THERE WAS A LOT MORE THAN THIS LKSDJGKLDSGLS I WOULDNT CRY PURELY BC OF THAT) but yaaa and now im better but like the entire day i was throwing up in class (or like feeling anxious im exaggerating sorry) about going home.

i didnt want mo out but with that being said i didnt want anyone out?? after i mentioned to him that stephen/mo were targeting each other, rhys came to me with the idea that like him jared chloe and i should make a chat, and i was down for that bc it would secure my positioning and like ALSGKSDG who'd flip on an alliance THIS early.. right?? right..

chloe was really not talkative with me. stephen/jared were active so i appreciate that immensely. im just thrown off. i dont really know who i can or cant trust.

OK ALSO SIDE NOTE CHRIS SENT ME [IM NOT EXAGGERATING] 55+ MSGS SPILLING TEA ABOUT HOW THE TUATHA HAD AN OG ALLIANCE WITH EVERYONE BUT MITCH + MAYNOR - which i knew about but LASKGLDKS AHHHH. and he leaked that stephen wanted kori/bryce targeted and i leaked that to bryce to further stephens target. IM JUST SO MESSY LOL

also i kind of predicted a swap likeee omfg. and i dont know how i feel. i kind of felt safe on my tribe??? but like.. oh no. anyway, my tribe isnt super dominant in challenges or anything (compared 2 the other tribe who has bryce/stephen/drew), but i think we can win a lipsync since we have a woman, gay men, and a metrosexual male who has an outgoing personality (and i mean that in the nicest way obviously). IDK I HOPE WE WIN BC THAT TRIBAL WAS HORRIFIC AND I LOVE MO SO MUCH AND AHH.

ill probs give a video soon in more depth with what chris said. yalls deserve it.. oops period.

I HOPE YALL CAN FORGIVE ME. im eating hotdog. bye bye love u all.

Wow I like the whole tribe! Alyssa is probably my front runner of talking and honestly she's great! I am in her spell ahhhh but hey JARED is here too woo! I think at least with Mitch and Zach too I'll be safe but I'll see! This challenge could either go really well or really badly for us but I'm excited to do anything creativity!!

I absolutly love my tribe at the moment, i'm getting along well with alot of them except Kori who i haven't spoken to much at all but im confident in our abilities to win! Jared is talking a little bit about wanting the game to pick up a little bit and i agree to some extent however blindsiding someone just for the sake of a blindside isn't smart gameplay so im just gonna lay low nd continue making those strong bonds here there and everywhere to hopfully come out on top should we end up at tribal

Can i PLEASE get a blindside

________________________________________________________________

hi it's 6 am but rhys fucking filmed vertically so if we lose he automatically has my vote

I feel good but also scared. I dont think I'll do as good of a job as I hope, but it also is turning out decently so far. My biggest concern is time. With having work tomorrow, I can only do the editing on my lunch break of 90 minutes, then whenever i get home which probably wont be until 6, given the upload time that leaves me with about 3 hours in total. Hopefully I'll be able to work with Rhys and Jack's stuff, as i think it'll be easier for me to do it then. Regardless, I'm gonna be a zombie but LOL this is the second Wednesday in a row I stayed up late except this is not for school and instead of 3 hours, ima get 2 hours of sleep haha that is so sad and funny and heebee jeebee zoinks, alright goodnight

Two things: 1) there's really nothing quite like making a fool of yourself multiple times in a single org, just to be immune for one round. 2) i am horrible at looking for idols

So Matt just told me he thinks we’re gonna have a double tribal right before merge which is like ew I hate that throw it out please, speaking of throwing out uh Kori can go because he’s wearing on my nerves like yes we’re gonna get things done on time calm down please and thanks.

these people are actually delulu if they think that video is winning. no fucking way we are winning. time to go to tribal!

So the swap has happened, and I get what is almost probably my worst case scenario player-wise. All of my close allies, with the exception of Kori, are currently on Cyrena. Meaning that winning immunity isn't even really good, since it puts them in danger.

I think there's a way to make this bad situation good though. Getting to finally work with Michael, Matt, Loris, and Drew can actually be a blessing in disguise. If I get on their good sides now, they might clue me into their plans once merge rolls around. That's the hope, anyway. For now my goal is just to survive being swapped with a bunch of people I've barely spoke to!

The past 24 hours have been major toughie for me. Staying up late and then trying to manage editing a video, work, and time constraints, and I won't lie, its been exhausting, but I didn't want to let my tribe down, or anyone down I guess. A little ways through, I kinda felt pretty defeated and then learning at last minute it was due an hour before I predicted made me panic A LOT internally, but it does seem like the tribe likes it so if we do lose and if they do vote me out, I can look back at this and feel like I did something right.

Well a lots happened and to be honest at times life and this game move too quick for me to even remember if I've mentioned it. We swapped, and I'm trying to just keep myself afloat however I can.

The challenge was overly stressful and I have no idea if we'll pull it out. Editing has been so stressful and I've found new appreciation for the people that do it. I just hope whatever I whip together will just be enough so that I can breathe and really take stalk of my new situation.

So, I haven't been around a whole bunch recently. However I'm glad we didn't go to tribal, that could've been  a reason if my name came up. So I'm glad I have time to more cement my bonds on this tribe and keep my name out of peoples mouths.

We JUST WON IMMUNITY WOOHOO. I was kind of nervous with a music challenge considering the only other one I did previously I did not do the greatest in :P. Both videos were amazing and im so glad Eve and Jones's mom liked ours significantly greater than the other one! As far as my position is concerned, I am reunited with Jared and our relationship is still strong I think so that's good. Stephen I am HOPING will be ok by just latching on to Kori at least for premerge. Those two are still the ones I trust the most, but I also like Alyssa Chris and Zach. I WISH i could connect more with jack, but i feel like every time we play together it gets more difficult to hold a conversation, so that's a yikes. Jared myself and stephen are diligently working on the idol search, but it's likely already found. I'm pretty sure there are too many components for someone to just find it by themselves

WELL. Im a target tonight! God we really do love that for me. We really do. Kori, eat my fucking ass. You leave me on read all the time. And then you have the NERVE. THE ACTUAL NERVE. to be like "omg stop slipping in my dm's!" Boo if you didn't leave me on read constantly then maybe i would actually want to speak to you! an actual moron. And then STEPHEN HAS THE FUCKING AUDACITY to me like "ya lol i'll be at tribal i'll make the decision between you and Kori at tribal!". BOI. THAT IS NOT HOW YOU GET TRUST IN SOMEONE. Its fucking ridiculous. Thank god Michael is in my corner, hopefully drew and bryce too. I am NOT getting 15th right now, no way. I am BETTER than this. i am going to make it work, tim gunn style. maybe its time to break the fajitas and channel their energy once again

Why do I go on the initiative literally ever? I'm clearly bad at it, I wasn't even remotely thinking things through and I SHOULD have let Stephen or someone else suggest someone but no I had to be mildly greedy and wanna send home Matt whom I barely DM.

I already flopped editing the video, and now here I am flopping the social/stategy game that I love playing supposedly.

Of course I tried reaching out to Michael and Drew FOOLISHLY because I wanted to build trust and maybe work with them. So naturally Michael tells Matt because ofc they'd be close as would Drew probably since he and Michael have been together since Day 1. As it stands I'm stuck praying Loris is gonna vote with me and it just sucks because I'm so bad at this game.

I'm trying to keep a cool head right now because there's still time. Stephen and I are trying to work logistics, see if we need to switch the vote to say Michael in case of an idol, but I'm not sure Loris/Bryce would be on board for that.

There's a pretty good chance that I'm definitely dead. But I'ma fight to the bitter end!

Today I learned from Stephen that Kori is in some dangerous water. He I guess said Matt's name to Michael who told Matt and now them and Drew are voting Kori. However Bryce and Stephen and perhaps Loris are all voting Matt. Now this is good if it works because honestly that group having to endure their numbers dwindling is good for my game. It only leaves Jack and Alyssa but I think we better be careful because I can see both of them slipping through the inevitable war zone that is gonna be happening.

Today's been a pretty informative day for me. After losing the immunity challenge by a hair, I was worried because I didn't think I had bonded very well with my current tribe through One World, luckily for me, that doesn't seem to be their biggest concern at the moment.

During the initial stages of the vote, I talked to Kori and the two of us decided Matt would be the easiest target to take out. I was leaning towards voting Matt because we hadn't talked very much, so hearing Kori was on board right away simplified things for sure. Bryce and Loris both seem to be on board with it too so I shouldn't have anything to worry about at this point.

In the morning, things got a whole lot more complicated. Matt found out he was the target through Michael, and began his campaign to get Kori out instead of himself. I'm not entirely sure why Michael decided to do this, but it doesn't make much of a difference at this point. Matt campaigned to me, and I sorta pretended to be on the fence. I was listening to what he said, but Kori is realistically one of my closest allies, there's no way I'm voting him out to side with people I had just met.

Once campaign season got under way, I had a conversation with Chris. Chris tells me that on original Orfeo, him, Loris, and Zach believed there was an alliance of Chloe/Sharky/Drew/Michael formed. This explains not only why Sharky was seen as an easy boot on swap-Tuatha, but also why Michael wants to keep Matt instead of Kori. With Chloe re-joining after tribal, him/Drew/Chloe/Matt would form a tight majority. Without Matt, they're a minority.

I proposed an idea to switch the vote from Matt to Michael or Drew. I said it was because I was worried about an idol, but this alliance is the real reason I wanted to do it. However, Kori, Loris, and Bryce are comfortable with the status quo and since it's not my neck on the line I didn't feel the need to push too hard.

Me, Kori, and Bryce now also have an alliance with Loris, which is cool? I haven't gotten very close with Loris yet but he seems like a smart player tied to Chris and Zach which spells good things for us working together in the future. Assuming I survive this vote and have a future, of course.

hi I think I might make it past final 15 that’s nice umm... I suggested an alliance of me Bryce Stephen Kori to counter the potential power of chloe Matt Michael and drew once chloe joins our tribe because my brain is massive. but now we’re like scared for idols . scary shih anyways like how r u I’m good.

________________________________________________________________

oh huh tribes r gonna be even again next round... so I have to make this conf by default just in case of a you know what wait no anna u said no more 24 hour challenges QUEEN ... thank god I can’t be bothered to delete this so she’s being SENT

Right now there's so many things running through my head with the introduction of Matts vote steal, because realistically i could convince him to give to me or i could keep him around as a potential shield. I don't want to do it to the guy but also a vote steal could shift the tides of the game in my favour later down the line. so it's a difficult decision and one id rather have more time to contemplate.

Wooo ok operation vote steal is a go and next round we’ll be swimming in green hopefully but with one world sis og tribe lines just ain’t it!

God im over this tribal. Like ugh these people really are under Kori's mist so like im probably going home. Do I think i might be able to survive? a small glimmer of hope says yes, but i'm not confident. God im just... so annoyed at this. Im clearly on the outs here and I just HOPE i can pull through i just am so scared. I know if i do leave though that I have fought my damn hardest to stay tonight. Im trying to think of the positives because its hard to do so because im being sad atm.. UGH. the fajitas really have failed me tonight, their light has dimmed and their guidance is no more. i am now with the darkness. we r one.

Oh my fucking god my heart is breaking. Matt is basically in such a deep hole he's going to go home, unless he plays an idol. And Alyssa has an idol. And she doesn't think it's smart to use it on him because Michael says he's just gonna go home next round. His social game hasn't been up to snuff and they're gonna boot him regardless, so she wants to keep us with power and let him go. And I agree with her. Which kills me. I'm usually able to just be a robot when it comes to this like yes I will make the smarter decision if it means I'll be emotionally torn, and this is such an instance. Luckily, it's not my idol to give up. Yes Alyssa says it's "our" idol but it's her call end of the day. I just... fuck. This is all stars man. And I'm actually starting to feel, for once.

Well it's about an hour before tribal and at least on it's surface it would seem Matt is going. I'm not confident though because any number of things COULD happen. I'm hoping there's no idol play, just because I feel like pre-merge just isn't a good look for me.

If Matt does pull something off, then kudos to him, and if it's me that'd make this my final confessional for the season. I've had such an amazing time playing and while I feel like I've been playing a lower key game on purpose I feel like I'm doing what I can to really come into my own. I hope the bonds I've made are gonna stick and that everything works out for us.

But if it doesn't I guess I'll have to find a way to be ok with that. This has been such a unique All-Stars experience so far, and I hope I can take what I've gotten from it and make myself better for it. (Also highkey hopefully this isn't my last confessional and I'm getting sentimental for no reason.)

________________________________________________________________

Kori is voted out 4-3.