#lol ao3 didn't exist when i was 15

[peachsukii]

sweet like honey ꒰ tangled hearts series - kiribaku x fem!reader ꒱ ⇢ you and kirishima organize a small dinner to celebrate bakugo's 31st birthday.

꒰ tags & content ꒱ fluffy & tooth-rotting fluff for kat's birthday ♡ cross posted to ao3 // wc; ~1.1k ✿ tangled hearts masterlist ✿ ↶ | previous entry (twisted in bedsheets) ↷ | next entry (stitched muses)

Trying to plan a surprise was literally impossible in the Kirishima-Bakugo household. The house was always in pristine condition, everything in it's proper place and able to be located without a second thought. If something was moved or used, there was a 95% chance Bakugo would notice, no matter what it was - his favorite spatula, a random mug, and even a specific set of towels in the bathroom. He had the house mapped in his mind down to the last non-existent dust bunny in the foyer.

By some miracle, Bakugo believed Kirishima was taking him out to dinner for his birthday and didn't invite you along. Sure, they needed their time alone together too, but most of the time, Bakugo was the one making sure you were included in their plans. It all worked out in your favor, though. Earlier in the week, you’d texted the both of them to trick Bakugo into thinking you wouldn’t see him Saturday.

the lion, the witch & the gym bro ❤️💖🧡 [you] hey babes! are you guys free saturday for dinner? [katsu 🐯🧡] what kinda fuckin’ group name is that?! i better be the lion [katsu 🐯🧡] and sorry baby, eiji's made plans for us [eiji 🥊❤️] i think it’s cute 😜 [eiji 🥊❤️] sorry love! we can meet up for breakfast on sunday though 💕 [you] that's okay! yes, kats, you're the lion lol. breakfast on sunday it is 💖

Kirishima was fully aware of your plan, ecstatic that you wanted to do something so sweet for Bakugo. He’d told you how all of his past surprise parties had failed for him - he couldn’t keep the excitement to himself and would fold before the party happened. You had to do a little work to be sure he wouldn’t spill the beans this time, too. Nothing a few sweet kisses couldn’t fix, promising to reward him for keeping quiet.

A quick trip to the grocery store and plenty of recipe research later, you had everything you needed to make the dinner. Kirishima mentioned that you’d have about half an hour to set up and get everything ready, so most of the cooking would need to be done in your apartment. It was simple, a mish-mash of his favorites; mapo tofu, cooked salmon with a honey garlic glaze and some grilled vegetables. You thought about using Bakugo’s home grown veggies, but that would have given away the surprise if he saw them go missing that morning.

Cooking went surprisingly easier than you thought it would. Creating the glaze for the salmon was honestly the hardest part, but you're proud of how it looks and smells, the fish cooked with a perfect sear. Your kitchen smells incredible and it's sad that the aroma won't be fully following you to their home.

Just when you're putting everything in the oven to keep warm, you get a text from Kirishima.

[eiji 🥊❤️] we’re leaving the house now! you’re clear to head over in five minutes [you] thanks eiji! i’ll pack up and head over.

When you arrive at their house, you park around the corner to be sure Bakugo doesn't see your car before he goes inside. Your unloading the food onto the kitchen counter when your phone buzzes three times, one from Kirishima and two from Bakugo, outside of your group chat.

[eiji 🥊❤️] headed home, kats is a little grumpy lol. see you in 15!

[katsu 🐯🧡] eiji fucked up our reservation and we're headed home [katsu 🐯🧡] if ya wanna come over. miss you sweets

'Oh, if only he knew,' you thought, smiling to yourself. You don't respond and place your phone back on the counter.

With the food in the oven to warm up, the table set, the lights off, and Bakugo's present on the counter, you were ready for them to walk through the door any moment now. Kirishima warned you that Bakugo was upset, but you're confident his mood will do a 180 once he sees the true plan.

The front door opens, accompanied by shoes hitting the floor and keys hitting the table in the entry way.

"Can't believe they messed up the reservation," you hear Bakugo complain, grumbling to himself. "Stupid ass fancy place can't keep their books straight."

"I know, I'm sorry baby," Kirishima apologizes, looking toward the kitchen to catch your eye. "But I think you'll prefer to be home, anyways."

Bakugo's about to question why when you walk out of the kitchen and into view, hair pulled back in a neat ponytail and wearing his favorite pretty black dress.

"Happy birthday, Katsuki! Hope you're hungry, we've got plenty waiting for you."

You're expecting him to burst out laughing, make a snarky comment, or roll his eyes with a smirk on his face, but none of that comes. He stands there, awestruck with a gleam in his carmine stare while his lips curl into a genuine smile.

"You two really did all this for me?" Bakugo asks, looking back and forth between you and Kirishima.

"Of course, Kat. You deserve to be spoiled! Come on, dinner is ready." You take his hand and lead him into the kitchen, pulling out his normal chair at the table. Kirishima follows, helping you prep three plates of food and delivering them to the table. After you place Bakugo's plate down in front of him, he grabs your face and tugs you back into his bubble to kiss you.

"Thank you," he whispers, nuzzling your nose before letting you go. He repeats then sentiment to Kirishima as well, giving him a peck on his forehead before he joins the table. "Both of you."

The three of you devour every bite of dinner - it turned out absolutely fantastic, ending with Bakugo asking you for the recipe you used for the salmon. That's the highest compliment coming from him, knowing that he's going to take the original and hit the ground running with a version of his own.

"One more thing for you, Kats!" you exclaim, grabbing the gift bag from the counter. Bakugo takes the present from you, rustling through the orange tissue paper. When he pulls out the brand new gardening tool kit, including some vegetable and flower seeds, his eyes sparkle with delight.

"I know you more than likely have a set already, but it never hurts to have a back up!"

Bakugo sets the bag on the counter and scoops you into a tight hug.

"Thank you, princess. I appreciate it."

Kirishima struts over, patting him on the back. "Maybe our little goddess here could help you plant the new seeds! Now that you have two sets, you could teach her how you tend to the garden."

"That's a great idea, Red. We can start soon with spring in full swing."

You couldn't be happier with how the day turned out. Seeing Bakugo's smile is all you ever wished for. He was glowing for the rest of the night, giddy over the idea of teaching you all about his gardening ways in the coming weeks.

Safe to say, it was a successful birthday.

⋆ ˚ʚɞ — recipe for the salmon cause it made my mouth water! i also wrote this in a frenzy so i hope it still is quality haha ✿ wildflowers; @maddietries @smolbeanzzz @camila2201 @lik0 @pixel4ffecti0n @moonlight-dreamer04 @lumi-cent @pastelbakugou @hannahk @camryn-ciel67 @c4prisuna @perfectsukii @screechingpeachdelusion

[justagalwhowrites]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you for the tag, @sawymredfox!!!

1. how many works do you have on AO3?

21

2. what’s your total AO3 word count?

1,032,269. When you throw in the Tumblr only stuff I think I'm closer to 1.2 million overall.

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Pedro Pascal fandom, mostly TLOU! But I'd love to spend some time with Poe Dameron, my beloved, so I might dive into Star Wars beyond Mando at some point :)

4. top five fics by kudos 

I'm really not sure on Tumblr? Individual chapters don't get as much attention and I don't write many one shots, my highest single post on Tumblr is probably a one shot but I have NO CLUE which one!

On AO3:

Lavender

Beskar Doll

Yearling

New in Town

Lavender No Outbreak AU

5. do you respond to comments?

I used to be so much better about doing this and I've just not been keeping up with it lately. I want to get back to it! I LOVE getting comments, they make me so happy! Part of my issue is I read them immediately even if I don't have time to respond and I'm like "I'll respond when I post the next chapter" and then I post the next chapter super late at night and I'm so tired and I'm just like "I'll reply later" and then I never do.

ANYWAY! I want to get back to replying to comments because I love them. I used to reply to every one. Less now.

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Proof of Life, an angsty as hell QZ!Joel era one shot. I traffic in angst but I like my happy endings, especially for long fics :)

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Lavender I think. After all that angst, they got the life they wanted and saved the world. Not too shabby.

8. do you get hate on fics?

I haven't really! I've had a few people disagree with directions I took characters or plot lines and a few people send asks that didn't feel so nice but I'm not sure they were intended to not be nice. I try to not take those things personally. But everyone as been exceedingly kind, probably kinder than I deserve!

9. do you write smut?

I do but I feel like it's my weakest area. If you're looking primarily for smut and reading my stuff, you're probably in the wrong place, I'm sorry! I wish I was better at it! I feel like I'm getting better at it. But alas!

10. craziest crossover?

I haven't written any and I haven't really read any, either. Closest thing I came to a crossover I think is tying the prequel trilogy and the original trilogy of Star Wars into Doll's history in Beskar Doll.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

None so far!

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Not shared anywhere but I do have commenters in other languages tell me they've put my fic into Google Translate to read it! I think that's immensely cool .

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

I haven't but I'd be open to it! 

14. all time favorite ship?

Of characters that actually exist in canon? Probably Han Solo and Leia Organa. I LOVE them. Love love love love LOVE them. The "I love you" "I know" in Empire followed by the reversal in Jedi? TO DIE FOR.

15. what’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

As far as fics go? None. I have the stories so thoroughly planned there I'm compelled to finish them, I can't help it. I wasn't always this thorough of a planner, though, and I have so many books that I've started and written like 40k words of that I'll probably never finish. That breaks my heart a little. All these characters who won't get to live their whole lives because I can't get their stories across the finish line. But I'm not sure I have enough hours left in the rest of my life to tell every story I've got inside me so it'll have to be what it will be!

16. what are your writing strengths?

Dialogue.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

Everything else lol especially smut. I feel like my descriptions are often lacking, too.

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Yes please! As long as the author can do it right (either because they know the language enough or get help from someone who does - the translate tools just aren't great at grammar and it takes me out if it's a language I know.)

19. first fandom you wrote in?

The Pedro fandom! Specifically, the Mandalorian. Beskar Doll, my first baby <3

20. favorite fic you’ve written?

Probably Lavender? Maybe Yearling. It's so hard to say! I'm probably the most attached to Doc and Joel, though.

NP tags: @dancingtotuyo @beardedjoel @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @netherfeildren and anyone else who wants to play!

[thank-god-and-you]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by @4getfulimaginator2022. Thank you! <3

How many works do you have on AO3?

I'll use my FFN stats since I'm not transferring everything from there over to AO3. Fic count on FFN is 204, though that's not including the ones I archive privately, so technically the number of fics I've posted is 253.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

Again, going on FFN word count since that's where everything is. That stands at over two million: 2,197,752.

HOWEVER, I also have a further 817,563 words of fics privately archived, so in actuality I've hit the three million mark: 3,015,315! I knew I must be climbing up there, but I had no idea that I'd surpassed it, so that made me happy!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently, it's Downton Abbey (Anna/Bates), EastEnders (Suki/Eve), Game of Thrones (Daenerys/Jorah), Gentleman Jack (Anne/Ann), and The Incredibles (Bob/Helen).

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Sed Me Domum et Aedificabo a Throno [Game of Thrones, Daenerys/Jorah]

Tokens of Deep Affection [Wreck-It Ralph, Felix/Calhoun]

Vivat Crescat Floreat  [Game of Thrones, Daenerys/Jorah]

Magic in Mundanity [The Incredibles, Bob/Helen]

Veritas, Unitas, Caritas [Game of Thrones, Daenerys/Jorah]

And favourites on FFN, since I still use that site:

1. Seeing is Believing [Pokémon, Jessie/James]

2. Swinub May Fly [Pokémon, Jessie/James]

3. The Shadow Proves the Sunshine [Downton Abbey, Anna/Bates]

4. A Comedy of Errors [Pokémon, Jessie/James]

6. A Meeting of Fates [Downton Abbey, Anna/Bates]

5. Do you respond to comments?

On FFN, yes, since it's done via PM. On AO3, no. I really appreciate all comments, but I despise that it counts my response, and I won't inflate my comment count. But of course I read each one.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

One of my suuuuuper old Pokémon fics, Twisted. It's sooooo bad. Young teen Dan was dark and depressed. If I didn't think it was important to leave everything up to show progression, I'd delete it and pretend it never existed.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Nearly all of my fics have happy endings because I mostly write fluffy oneshots, so pretty much take your pick.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I did once have a comment on a Dany/Jorah fic which had nothing to do with the fic and just hated on the ship, which I rolled my eyes hard at. What is the point in seeking out something you don't like? Weirdo behaviour. And, you know, it was from a Dany/Jon stan, so...people in glass houses and all that.

9. Do you write smut?

I do. Not as often as I used to, but when the mood strikes. Most of my smut scenes/fics are archived privately, though.

10. Do you write crossovers?

No. I did extensive planning for one once, but the crossover universe was mostly just there as background. Whether I ever get around to actually writing it remains to be seen, but I wouldn't write another because I have no real interest.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not as far as I know!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Someone once asked wayyyyy back in 2012 if they could translate one of my fics, but I don't know if that ever happened. And I deleted it to archive privately, so probably not, LOL.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have not! I'm not sure if I'd be any good at it, I'd feel the pressure!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

Well, it's been over twelve years since I wrote my first Anna/Bates fic, and I still write a little bit for them most days (just a slow and steady process). I still love all of my old ships, but Anna/Bates has had the longevity to endure almost nine years after the end of the show (I don't count the movies because they're whatever), and they're still so, so special to me. <3

(Although I do spend most of my time these days completely fixated on Suki/Eve because MY GOD, that ship has completely altered my brain chemistry.)

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

It's not a 'doubt I ever will' thing just yet, because I am still very much writing Anna/Bates fic, but I have one in particular that I haven't touched in six years where the final line of the penultimate chapter has lived rent-free in my head for all that time...I've just never committed it to paper yet, and I'm still a couple of chapters away from it.

But I finally finished the bonus chapter of Made of Starlight [Downton Abbey, Anna/Bates] seven years after posting the final chapter on FFN, so there's every chance I'll pick it back up in the near future.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I don't think I'm particularly good at anything, but if I had to pick something...Dialogue, maybe? I always have lots of fun with characters interacting with each other, anyway, regardless of whether it's good or not.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Description. I feel like it's often clunky and not evocative enough.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I used to write it in italicised English. Nowadays, if a character is speaking to another in a language they both understand, I'll still do this, but if it's from the POV of a character who doesn't understand it, I'll write it in the other language but try to do the HTML on AO3 where hovering over it on desktop will give the English translation. For example, this was pivotal for the fourth chapter of Vivat Crescat Floreat, since the whole point of the chapter was supposed to be Tyrion's frustration at not knowing what the hell Daenerys and Jorah were talking about. It would not have worked if the audience could read the Common Tongue right off the bat, but the hovering at least gives the audience the context that Tyrion does not have.

I don't bother on FFN since hardly anyone uses that site anymore, haha.

Of course, the only language that I do know is English, so I have to rely on translate for other languages...which, let's face it, can be horrendously inaccurate.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Pokémon. I don't keep up with the anime much these days, but I'm always there for a new game, haha.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I don't really do favourites because I'm mostly just meh about what I've written, but I'll always have a soft spot for A Meeting of Fates, purely because it was the first multi-chaptered fic that I ever finished.

Lost in Balms [Downton Abbey, Anna/Bates, privately archived] is one I had a lot of fun with. I started it in April 2017 and completed it July 2023, but during all that time I had such a clear image of how I wanted the climax to go down. I actually wrote the fic in an entirely linear fashion, so thinking of that one scene kept me going for five years until I actually reached it, and it was one of the most satisfying things to write because of how long it had taken for me to get there.

And not a fic mention per se, but the fourth 'chapter' of And Beauty There Echoes the Speck of Our Souls [EastEnders, Suki/Eve] gave me all the feels to think about and write. I wrote it at a time where I was struggling with Suki and Eve's breakup in canon, and it brought me great comfort to focus on. And another Suki/Eve fic that I'm working on right now is giving me the same warm fuzzies because it's something I desperately want at some point in the future. <3

[meownotgood]

20 fic writing questions, thank you for tagging me @hash-slinging-slasher-trash 💪💕

1) how many works do you have on ao3?

14 total works!!

2) total ao3 word count?

253,421.... damn... I haven't checked so I didn't expect it to be so much lol (that's a lot of aki)

3) what fandoms do you write for?

chainsaw maaaan (aki man) but I hope to write more for bg3 in the future because I really enjoyed it!!

4) top 5 fics by kudos?

#1 quiet dream with 1,009 kudos

#2 arrival in tokyo with 568 kudos

#3 fired with 473 kudos

#4 a little death with 413 kudos

#5 cherry waves with 389 kudos

the way my fic with the most hits and kudos isn't even aki... it's a dan heng x reader fic I wrote in like three days... 😭 I suppose it's because I wrote it right when hsr came out so I got in on it early... either way it makes me laugh LOL

5) do you respond to comments?

I try to! I read every one just sometimes too busy to reply

6) what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

the end x3 and last act are pure angst all the way thru. last act is definitely my fic with the darkest or angstiest ending (and also my least popular fic, interestingly) (I don't blame u for not wanting to read about aki dying we read to get away from that ok)

7) the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

happy does not exist in chainsaw man world so the gale fic I recently wrote has to be up there. gale please marry me so we can live happily ever after

8) do you get hate on fics?

not on my fics on ao3 I don't think but I've had anonymous hate mail telling me my writing sucks or whatever, it's to be expected at least once on tumblr so it doesn't bother me in the slightest haha

9) do you write smut?

hahha.... me? noooooo.... I'm innocent... (LYING)

10) craziest crossover?

never written a crossover fic but I've had a lot of dreams about aki meeting other characters if that counts

11) have you ever had a fic stolen?

......... unfortunately 😭 (let's not talk about the incident) (every time I see l*on k*nnedy I hear the voices)

12) have you ever had a fic translated?

not to my knowledge

13) have you ever co-written a fic before?

not exactly but I helped my beloved f1gments write her fic detour and she helped me a lot with under the influence, it wouldn't be a thing without her help!!! ily 💓💞💕💞

14) favorite ship?

me x aki (or akiangel I suppose)

15) a wip you want to finish but probably never will?

I wrote 10k words for a gun fiend fic that never ended up happening, he's quite difficult to write lol...

16) writing strengths?

writing a lot and being unshamefully crazy 💪

17) writing weaknesses?

dialogue is so hard for me 😭 also I need to have more confidence in myself!!

18) thoughts on dialogue in another language?

it's hot.

19) first fandom you wrote in?

if we're talking on ao3 it's chainsaw man, but if we're talking in general... I wrote my fair few of madoka magica and warrior cats fanfictions back in the days.....

20) favorite fic you've written?

I'll always hold a little death close to my heart <3 it was so fun to write and truly when I fell back in love with writing I think. I would have given up if it wasn't for the experience I had creating that fic

not sure who to tag but! anyone is welcome to join!

[klunkcat]

tagged by @goodlucktai <3333

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

45 lol but i have I think. 30 wips that exist somewhere on my computer at any given moment. alas.

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

701,032

which..... is like far too many words per fic actually imo

3. What fandoms do you write for?

honestly whatever currently grabs my brain stem changes a lot but i think my top ones are tmnt and stranger things (what a wild combo actually). Actively atm I have a trigun wip and a tmnt one

4. Top five fics by kudos?

A Kiss is a Kiss (But it's never like this) - 6,528

(something happens and I'm) head over heels - 3,518

Green with Envy - 1,880

Forget the mess I'm in - 1,791

Weak Point - 1,366

5. Do you respond to comments?

literally I am the WORST for remembering to reply I'm so sorry. I must say that I do read all of them in my email and screenshot them and cry

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

angsty endings are too much 4 me I believe so strongly in hurt/comfort but....

Impossible Things and the Tin Can I think is the most like, conceptually tragic series I've written

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Comfort is a requirement but I think but like Stepping over the line is basically just an extended meet cute so nothing really sad happens at all lol?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Actually genuinely have never gotten a rude comment in my life I did once get someone being hyper pushy about new chaps when I was like.... 19? Sometimes comments veer I think towards misunderstanding unreliable narrator elements and can be a little intense as a result

9. Do you write smut?

ehhhhhh closest I've ever gotten was dancing around the topic lol

10. Craziest crossover?

omg me and tai have gone down some rabbit holes and made a tangled/good omens fusion among other things, which was cute 2 me

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I've gotten some requests, not sure if they got uploaded anywhere?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I did once many years ago but we didn't end up finishing it from what I remember!

14. All time favourite ship?

oh god I mean. ineffable husbands and wangxian invented romance. big mckirk and vashwood fan despite what my published fics would tell you. stsg ruined my life this year. I'm really big on platonic friendships though personally

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My google docs are a cesspit of fics I will never finish. Once made a wangxian softball fic that will never see the light of day but I think of it fondly

16. What are your writing strengths?

Might actually be a weakness and not a strength but boy do I love prosey metaphor nonsense. Sometimes I think it works other times who's 2 say.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Fighting scenes man, combat is hard as hell.

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

in general I dooooon't write it too much just because I don't speak anything beyond like. grade 2 level spanish so.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

tmnt :' )

20. Favourite fic you've written?

Oh tricky. Stealing tai's idea of a top 5

Forget-Me-Nots - :') big ol love u to tai for this

Both the Sweet and the Bitter - so sorry to anyone who follows me for ST fics because I'm probably never going to write for it ever again or finish this but a dear friend of mine helped me with this story and it means a lot 2 me as a result. The flower metaphors were fun to research.

Plain White Beach Houses - also same as the above but idk pacific rim au....house metaphors.... I love this series a lot

change up, high inside - wanted to write a softball fic for my whole life basically and this is more or less me just waxing poetic about the sport if I'm honest

Feedback Loop - this fic was actually insane like. took me I think a full year to write out? There's a lot of stuff in this that I lol cannot reread anymore for reasons but damn if it wasn't a learning experience to write all around

Tagging @eternalglitch @byrdybyrd02 @jinbugs if u want to besties!

[waitineedaname]

20 questions for 20 writers!

tagged by @buffintruder thank you!!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

89 ! that feels like a lot

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

355,274 which also feels like a lot!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

usually whatever I'm hyperfixating on at the time! right now it's mdzs/the untamed, but I've got some scum villain wips in the works

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Handsome Mystery Boy -- Skam soulmate AU

hot dilfs in your area (not clickbait!!1!) -- HLVRAI modern au

Strider Bros Feelings Jam -- Homestuck post-canon

Let's Get This Over With -- HLVRAI dream-sharing

The Secret Boyfriend -- TAZ Balance modern au

5. Do you respond to comments?

usually! it might take me a bit, but I usually try to respond, especially if it's a more recent fic. if it's an old fic or the comment is just, like, a string of heart emojis or something, I usually don't respond. doesn't mean the comment doesn't make me smile though!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

tbh I don't write a whole lot of angsty endings? even if it's an angsty fic, I try to end on at least a hopeful/bittersweet note, y'know? I guess the angstiest ending would be Frayed Seams because it's in the middle of the series and is giving context to the strained relationship between the Kageyama siblings. they do eventually begin to mend their relationship by the end of the series! just. not in this fic.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

this is once again rather hard because I mostly write happy endings! and I have a lot of short fics that are just. pure fluff. I guess if I'm looking for a fic that's long enough to Earn a happy ending, it would be a tie between Plant Their Hearts In Community Gardens or the sun in the summertime! I love how much Mob and Reigen's lives have improved by the end of the show <3

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not that comes to mind! I don't think I've ever gotten hate comments, so if people don't like my stuff they at least only complain about it somewhere I can't see it, which I appreciate

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

not really! I am usually a genfic writer lol though I have had wlwangxian robot sex on the brain lately for. reasons. and also I have a feeling some of my bingqiu fics are going to be like, scenes in the Middle of them having sex, because [gestures] bingqiu

10. Do you write crossovers?

I haven't done a whole lot of them, but I think the concept can be fun if executed properly! crossovers where the two casts meet don't generally appeal to me, but crossovers that function more like an au (characters from Series A in the universe of Series B) are more my speed. I have been pondering a svsss/hlvrai crossover....

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

god I hope not

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yeah! I've had a couple fics translated into Russian, way long ago

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

not in a "we both were writing the fic in its entirety" way but I have written some aus and fics where I was bouncing ideas off friends so much that they might as well be a co-author. Let's Get This Over With would not exist without @neonlav's help

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

oh christ I have no idea. I'm a genfic person. bingqiu is doing something vile to my brain chemistry lately though

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

so many... so so many......... do not look in my google docs folder, there are too many untitled documents that have been abandoned........... I guess a more recent example would be a mdzs fic where wei wuxian is the juniors' camp counselor. I think the idea was v fun but I could not figure out where to take it. man I wish I was an artist so I didn't have to write plots for my silly little aus

16. What are your writing strengths?

dialogue! I love writing dialogue, especially when I feel like I really Get a character

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

fight scenes.... also pacing and figuring out how to end a fic, final lines are so hard

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I am not fluent enough in another language to pull off writing whole chunks of dialogue in another language! sometimes I'll use terminology from another language, especially if it doesn't translate well (like Japanese or Chinese honorifics and family terms) but otherwise I don't write in another language bc I would be too worried about it being incorrect

19. First fandom you wrote for?

it was, embarrassingly, for the since disgraced video game youtuber Cryaotic. in my defense, I was thirteen. the first fandom I posted fic for was for Hetalia, which is just as embarrassing. once again, my defense is that I was fourteen

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I am genuinely so goddamn proud of Let's Get This Over With. I had so much fun writing it, there are some concepts in it that I'm really proud of, and I just really enjoyed writing for hlvrai. those character voices were fun to play with

I'll tag @patron-saints, @scribefindegil, @localdisasterisk, @thatneoncrisis, and @notedchampagne!

[midsummer-semantics]

Tagged by @hornedqueenofhell

this is exciting!

divider by @/saradika-graphics

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

37

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

552,698

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stranger Things primarily, but I have written for Harry Potter and Marvel

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

- Free-Use Healthcare - Forehead Kisses - Big Dick Energy™️ - cherry on my lips - Gold Rush

5. Do you respond to comments?

I didn't really respond much in the beginning but I try to respond every time now. Even if it's just a heart or "i loved this," I want everyone to know that I appreciate them taking the time to read AND leave a comment.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

holy palmers' kiss I suppose has the angstiest ending considering it exists in the canonverse. At the very end, Steve thinks "Maybe we can save each other," but we know from a fan perspective that Eddie dies because Steve isn't there to save him that Steve and Eddie live happily ever after.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This is entirely personal opinion because I really only do HEAs lol It's either my big boy The Fool, The World, and Everything in Between because Steddie fight to live as normal a life as possible in the wake of s4 and end up getting engaged at the end, or it's Best friends, ex-friends ‘til the end (better off as lovers) because they bonded, like, a day into being reunited because they were soulmates.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Aside from one comment from someone being marginally racist about how Italians aren't darker skinned (Steve is Sicilian in one of my series and Sicilians are notoriously darker skinned), not really. But I recently heard that some people use priv bookmarks to make sure they avoid reading something again, and while I think that's counterproductive to the bookmark count, I don't really want to know if it's happened to me.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yep! Almost exclusively, but I do have a few fics that are smut-free which I'm always surprised by. All Steddie, all gay, and it ranges from soft love-making to filthy, dirty, wet and messy sex.

10. Do you write crossovers?

The only crossover I've written was for Marvel, and that only counts on a technicality that it was a crossover between Eternals and Daredevil.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of, but I haven't actually scoured the internet to check. I hope if something was stolen, the people reading it still enjoyed it.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I think so? I had a HP fic translated into Russian but I never followed up on the website to see if it ever got posted.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

When I wrote the Marvel fic, yes. I was working on and Eternals Ikaris/OFC while my best friend wrote a Daredevil/OFC and my other friend wrote a Jessica Jones/OFC, and we had them all in the same room multiple times.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Steddie, hands down. Nothing has had be in a chokehold quite like this.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

So many, and I've lost interest at the moment in one I was actually posting, but I'm hoping to pick it back up after the Big Bang is finished. Probably with massive re-writes.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm funny, so I would like to say I have a lot of really solid lines in fics that make people laugh out loud. Also my world-building tends to be extensive (so much plot in my porn every damn time), but I don't want to classify that as a weakness so strength it is.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I don't tend to plan things out. I usually have a scene or two in mind and then I write around them and piece it together like Frankenstein's Monster. It's worked out for me so far, but I wish I planned things better sometimes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've done it a few times. For my Italian Steve/Mexican Eddie series I have both boys speaking second languages but not well lol I just make it part of the bit because, like Eddie in this, I also speak Spanish but not well. This is my official request that if you do speak another language that I've written in and it's wrong, feel free to let me know lol

19. First fandom you wrote for?

My Chemical Romance. I was 13. We don't talk about it.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

I'm really attached to The Fool, The World, and Everything in Between because it's a chonky boy (107k words) and it took me 9 months to write, but We'd rather be six feet under (than be lonely) is a very close second because I really got to play with Steve's inner monologue there and I think the approach I took to the fake dating trope was really original.

non-pressure tags: @tedewitt @malikat24601 @mojowitchcraft @lexirosewrites

[katareyoudrilling]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks for tagging me @wheresarizona and @burntheedges !

1. how many works do you have on AO3?

0

2. what's your total AO3 word count?

0

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Pedro Pascal

4. top five fics by kudos

By tumblr notes I think my Sweepstakes fics are my most popular, followed by Jackpot Frankie

5. do you respond to comments?

Every single one! If I haven't responded to your comment/reblog, then something went wrong

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I have not attempted angst (and probably never will) but my least traditionally happy ending is probably my Sweepstakes Dave epilogue. *I* think it’s a happy ending, but others may disagree.

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

They are all very happy, but the happiest is probably Construction Corner. They’re very settled and secure at the end of that one

8. do you get hate on fics?

I haven't yet

9. do you write smut?

Absolutely

10. craziest crossover:

I have discovered that I love sticking multiple Pedro boys into one fic (whether that counts as a crossover, I have no idea). It just makes me happy. I have one coming up that will be the craziest 😈

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Not that I know of

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have! It was a fun exercise

14. all time favorite ship?

I don't really have one, probably because my entry into fanfic was the Pedro verse that doesn't really do ships. I can be convinced of most ships if it's well written. I enjoy Din/Cobb when it crosses my dash.

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I have stray ideas every so often that I doubt I will ever write. There isn't anything I'm currently working on that I don't believe I will finish.

16. what are your writing strengths?

I write concisely. I hope I can pull my readers into my stories effectively in only a few words.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

I used to consider it a weakness that I am not wordy, but I've come to accept that it is my style and I should embrace it. Something I would like to work on, though, is more involved plotting.

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I use other languages sparingly. When I use them, I prefer them to be able to be understood in-line from context without needing translation.

19. first fandom you wrote in?

Wrote in? Richard Ayoade (if a fandom exists, I didn't know what fanfic was yet lol) I never posted anything until Pedro.

20. favorite fic you've written?

That is very difficult. I love all my fics for different reasons. Construction Corner is my brain. All About the Bass is my heart. And Couples Getaway is my 🐱lol

No pressure tagging: @grogusmum @schnarfer @secretelephanttattoo @i-own-loki (I’ve seen this going around for a while so forgive me if you’ve already done it)

[btsgotjams27]

this is us ~ jjk | 15

let's have that baby, shall we?

✨ title: this is us | (sequel to all grown up) ✨ pairing: jungkook x f!reader | ✨ rating: m/18+ | minors dni ✨ genre/au: drama, romance, angst, fluff, smut | est!relationship, age gap, bff's younger brother ✨ playlist | AO3 & Wattpad ✨ a/n: if you haven’t read the prequel to this, please do so here! :) ✨ a/n 2: wowieeee! tumblr has caught up and now readers here will have to wait for my sporadic updates 🙃 i apologize in advance lol. we only have a few more chapters left before their journey ends :'( but i have some fun things planned for when it's over. stay tuned.

[ SERIES MASTERLIST ] | next ✨ drabble ~ it'll be okay (jk pov)

chapter fifteen - here comes baby | wc: 5.4k warnings: language, alcohol consumption, depressing thoughts, self deprecation (oc has hit rock bottom, okay?), tears + angst (obvs)

~ three weeks since the breakup ~

Work was work, and it distracted you about everything Jeon Jungkook. After everyone had left, you sat in the writer's room, realizing it was the first time in a long time that you felt truly alone. You jumped from relationship to relationship to fill the void left by loneliness, but each breakup made it worse, and this one was the worst of them all.

You even avoided Yuna and Namjoon's because you wanted to avoid seeing Jungkook's face in family photos. Along with avoiding the newlyweds, Hyunie and Tae would just give you pitiful stares and pouts. You didn't dare to cross Jin because you were afraid he'd tell you how Jungkook was doing in LA and maybe even mention Alex.

But alas, you could only bury yourself in work for so long until it was time to head home.

Lights didn't exist in your life for the past two weeks, convincing yourself you were trying to save money on your energy bill, but you knew the real reason–the darkness on the outside reflected what you were feeling on the inside.

The brown box sat in the corner of your entryway, greeting you as you entered and exited. You considered throwing it away without looking at it, but something inside you wasn't ready to let go. If you'd thrown it away, you'd have contemplated its contents for far too long, berating yourself because what if there was something important in there? So leaving it in the corner until you were ready to look through it was a better option.

You blame the half-empty bottle of wine sitting next to the box on your coffee table. The alcohol coursing through your veins causes you to become sentimental and unable to think clearly. It's just a stupid box, but why were you so afraid to look through it?

It wasn't heavy or anything; it was pretty light. Perhaps Jungkook had thrown away a lot of things he didn't want to bring to LA. You understood, though, because you'd want to start over, fresh, new, with no baggage. Who would want to bring bad memories to a new place?

The wine glass was calling your name again, so you took another sip, finished it, and set it down. You closed your eyes and sighed as you ran your hand through your hair. It's now, or never, you reasoned. 'Never' sounded better, but you knew it couldn't be true.

Come on, you said to yourself, it's just a box. It's not that fucking hard.

You averted your gaze, your hand digging around for what appeared to be a pair of glasses. And you were correct when you examined it. They were your favorite pair, and you had been looking for them for a long time. That's where you left them, then.

You set them down and continued rummaging through the box, this time paying attention to the mementos. There was a dried peony from your first official date when he decorated Jin's rooftop, a mug the two of you painted together, with the tasteful side being Jungkook's and the not-so-pretty side being yours, and a few books and items of clothing.

A black binder clip held the last thing you took out together. You cocked your head, unsure what it could be, and it snapped as you unclipped it, causing you to yelp as it flew across the table, rattling against the mug. Fortunately, it did not break.

The couple in the polaroid was almost unrecognizable. They appeared younger, happier, and full of life and joy—all of which you lacked at the time. Your attention was drawn to the neat handwriting on the bottom–1 month.

You moved on to the next polaroid–two months. The next one was labeled three months, and so on, until you got to the last one, which was labeled nine months with a question mark. Except you weren't in the picture; only Jungkook was. You had to recall your relationship timeline and remember when you proposed a break. You could only imagine how Jungkook felt throughout it all, and you admitted to yourself that you put him through a lot. It wasn't fair to keep him at bay, but you couldn't figure out what you wanted if he were there to persuade you.

He didn't appear happy in the photo, rather tired. But you couldn't stand looking at it any longer. It was too painful to look at that last polaroid of him by himself, so you flipped it over, along with the rest of the polaroids, unsure what to do with them.

After going through the rest of the box containing small trinkets, you could probably throw them away. You half-expected to find your boudoir session photo album in there. But he might have burned it, as you would. Although a small voice in your head told you, he kept it. Your heart fluttered at the thought of him pulling it out to look at it now and then—heck, you even did it when you needed an ego boost. However, he'd be looking at it for different reasons. Regardless, you'll never know what happened to it, and you wouldn't dare to ask if he still had it.

Picking up the wine bottle, you didn't bother to pour it into your glass. The percentage of the wine didn't hit double digits, but you were a weak bitch tonight and grabbed a Moscato, which was practically a sweet and sugary drink packaged in a pretty wine bottle and label. Maybe your emotions were heightened because you sucked at holding your liquor, but you wanted to drown yourself in whatever was left remaining in the bottle.

You wiped the dribble of wine from your chin and grimaced as you inhaled the alcohol. Maybe you shouldn't have done it, but you were sick of feeling anything and desire to be numb.

You stood, leaving everything as it was, and shuffled to the bedroom, not bothering to clean it up. As you crawled beneath the covers, the duvet felt cool. Nighttime became the worst part of the day for you; during the day, you could keep yourself busy, but at night, there was nothing to do but race your mind like there was no end as if your mind would never shut down and just let there be silence.

You rolled onto your side, staring at the space that Jungkook used to occupy, only to find it empty. Emptiness is taking up a lot of space in your life these days, and you've thought, what if you weren't meant to be happy? There were happy memories in your life, but the bad had recently outweighed the good, and there wasn't enough good to offset the gloomy feelings.

Friday night rolled around, another week gone, another weekend to endure. Your apartment was supposed to be a place of solace and rest. Still, everywhere you looked, memories of you and Jungkook were scattered–imprinted with happy moments, flashbacks of back hugs, peppered kisses, and instances of magnetic, lust-filled encounters after long days of not seeing each other. Goosebumps trickled across your skin, thinking about Jungkook's touch and how much you missed it.

The last sexual encounter with him replayed in your mind for days on end, and you found yourself charging your vibrator more than your phone these days.

Stupid, you know. But it was hard not letting your mind wander off. You broke it off, but why were you still trying to hold onto him? Healing takes time, and you just want to hurry and try to find the light at the end of the tunnel. You didn't want to wallow in the darkness anymore.

You didn't bother to try and see if anyone was available to hang out, you were sure they were all busy with their significant others, and you were somewhat becoming accustomed to this routine of sitting at home and doing nothing. It was like clockwork–wake up, eat, work, eat, come home, eat, and sleep. You became lost in the same routine, your body, and mind on autopilot once you came home.

You had dozed off, mindlessly staring at your phone, not realizing it had rung a few times before you finally picked up the call. "Hey, Yuna." You only heard labored breathing from the other end. 

"Yuna? Are you okay?"

"I think–I think the baby's coming."

You heard shallow gasps before she groaned. Your eyes widened. "What? It's too early, isn't it?"

"I know, that's what I thought too, but I really think the baby's coming, and Namjoon left on a last-minute work trip because we didn't think the baby would be here."

"Okay–" you paused, putting your thinking hat on. "Do you have everything packed for the hospital?"

Yuna groaned louder before she answered, "Yeah, yeah. I've had it ready for weeks."

"Good. I will call the ambulance and send them over to your place. I'll call Namjoon and tell him what's happening, and then I'll meet you at the hospital. Okay?"

Yuna couldn't get any words out. She only hummed before hanging up.

You rushed to your room, grabbed a change of clothes and a few toiletries, stuffing everything into an overnight bag. Slipping on your shoes, you paused to pat down your pockets to ensure you had the essentials–wallet and phone.

Once the door slammed shut, you ordered a taxi on an app, then placed a call to Namjoon, which went straight to voicemail. Fuck, you thought. He was going to hate himself if he missed the arrival of his baby, and also, who goes on a trip so close to their baby's birth? But then again, Yuna was only thirty-six weeks.

"Hey, Namjoon. It's me. Yuna's going into labor right now, and I'm meeting her at the hospital. Call me when you get this."

It was the best you could do at the moment. You hoped he would see your call and get back to you soon.

Nearly fifteen minutes later, your taxi finally shows up. You called Yuna again, but there was no answer. You figured she could already be at the hospital, so she wasn't picking up.

There wasn't much you could do but wait. Per hospital rules, no one was allowed to go into the room. It was a dumb rule, you thought. How was a person supposed to go through something like this alone?

You were constantly checking your phone, double-tapping the screen to find no notifications from Namjoon. Should you call again? But what good would that do if he had not heard your first voicemail? You ran your hand through your hair, sighing and hating that you couldn't do anything but wait.

Once again, you were stuck in a hospital. You didn't want to wander off in case someone came looking. Maybe you could try to sleep since you didn't know how long birthing a baby could take. You looked around, but there were no comfortable spots to lie down. Slouching in your seat, you pulled out your phone again, swiping to unlock the screen, then opened Instagram, aimlessly scrolling through your feed.

Hyunie and Tae, the happy newlyweds, appeared before you, all cozy and lovey-dovey on their last-minute honeymoon getaway. They were love shacking it up in Phuket for the weekend. Lucky rascals, you thought. You wished you could leave on a whim and have no responsibilities. You double-tapped, leaving a heart on their photo.

You looked up from your phone when you saw someone sprinting into the waiting room and coming to a halt. Jin stood before you, out of breath, leaning over with his hands on his knees.

"I'm–" He looked up, giving a dismissive wave of his hand. "I'm fine."

You chuckled, searching for a water bottle in your bag. You held it out for him as he sat beside you, and he mumbled thanks before taking a few large gulps.

"Well–fancy seeing you here," Jin said as he was hunched over, his forearms resting on his thighs, swiping the water running down his chin.

You nudged his arm. "Don't be a smartass."

"I can't help it," he shrugged. "It's in my nature." Jin nudged you back, trying to lighten the mood, and you smiled in return.

"Wait–how did you know I was here?"

"Namjoon called me. Told me about Yuna."

You blinked profusely. Namjoon called Jin before he called you? Well, at least you knew Namjoon had heard your voicemail.

"I think he was going to call you back, but his phone must've died. He's trying to get a flight out right now."

Whew. You were relieved to hear that, and maybe he would get back in time for the baby's birth.

"How, uh, how are you? I haven't seen you in a while." He straightened his posture, peering at you.

The last time you saw Jin was when you made a fool of yourself by slapping Alex and causing a scene in front of his colleagues and Jungkook. "I'm okay," you reply, not wanting to dive into further details of how you are really doing. Honestly, these last few months have sucked big time, and you weren't just going to spill everything onto him. It wasn't the time or place, nor did you want to burden Jin with your emotions.

"I'm fabulous, by the way. Couldn't be better. I renovated my kitchen–the layout is much better than before, and the island is bigger, so feel free to come over and cook whenever you want."

Your lips thinned in an attempt to smile, but you understood that Jin was trying to be friendly and make small talk, which you were grateful for because you didn't feel like chatting too much. "I'm not the best cook, but apparently, the pasta you made for Jungkook and me was delicious." The mention of Jungkook made you suck in your lips for fear of wanting to bring up his name again.

Jin nodded. "It's all thanks to YouTube and TikTok. Sometimes I think I could do that, you know, make cooking content. I'd love to quit my job."

"Oh, really? You should–or I mean, at least, you could do it on the side as a hobby. It'll give you a nice break from your job, doing something you enjoy. And I'm sure you'd have a lot of followers."

"Hmm. I might consider that. Thanks."

"Anytime."

Both of you avoided each other's gaze, searching around the waiting room for something to look at, only to look at each other and give awkward smiles and chuckles.

"This is weird, isn't it?"

"I don't know what you mean," Jin tries to play it off, and you're thankful for it. "I'm not weird. You're not weird. I don't know how this is weird."

"Okay, now you're making it weird," you both laugh. Jin apologizes, but you shrug it off. "You don't have to say anything if you don't have anything to say. I don't mind the silence."

Jin nodded in agreement, but of course, he was never one to be good with silence. He waited a few minutes before speaking again. 

"Where do baby fish sleep?" You turned and gave him an expressionless face, blinking at the worldwide handsome man before you. "A bass-inet. Get it?" He let out a fake laugh, then apologized again.

"I bet you weren't good at the quiet game when you were a kid."

He shook his head. "Nope. My mom still loved me, though." You smiled and shook your head, and Jin's knee nudged yours. "Come on, that was a good joke!"

You hummed, but you wouldn't give him the satisfaction of verbalizing it. Even though Jin wasn't good at the quiet game, you didn't want to chat further because you could sense the giant elephant in the room. And in your mind, the flashing neon sign blinked, 'Jungkook.'

Jin stayed quiet for as long as he could before he broke the silence again. You could see him from your peripheral view, gazing at you, and yes, you would ignore it.

"Just ask me about him. I know you want to."

You sighed, shifting in your seat. "I don't know what you're talking about." You looked up at the digital sign in the waiting room, and you could've sworn it read, 'Jungkook.'

"It's written all over your face."

You fiddled with your thumbs, tilting your head to the side. Of course, you wanted to know how Jungkook was doing, and it has been on your mind every minute of every day since he left. But the thing was, you didn't know if you wanted to know the details of his new life in LA.

"Well, since you won't ask. I'll just tell you." You turned to him, about to ask him to stop, but he continued, "He's doing okay. He's settling into his new place and the new role at the company, and in case you're wondering," he paused, "Alex has been away on vacation, so he hasn't had to deal with her."

Your heart leaped at the name. You knew her name would come up sooner or later, but it still hurt to hear it. Many scenarios were running through your head. Would he go back to her? Would she manipulate him somehow? Make him feel guilty so he would run back to her?

Regardless of what would happen between them, it wasn't your place to say anything. Jungkook's a big boy, and he chose to leave. No one forced or convinced him otherwise. It was out of the blue because he never spoke to you about the job opportunity. Well–you guess you weren't the only one keeping secrets.

"You're too nice to ask. That's why I told you."

Jin was correct because, in your mind, it would've been easier to come up with a million possible situations than to know the truth. A part of you was relieved, and the other was riddled with anxiety. Truthfully, you just wanted to see if he was okay, so you were at least grateful to know that he was.

You smiled thinly at him, mumbling thanks before standing up and walking to the receptionist's desk. You wanted to focus on your best friend, not your ex-boyfriend.

Four hours since you arrived.

And there was no word about how Yuna was doing. You guessed no news was good news, right? Otherwise, you would've heard something by now.

Jin continued being his friendly self–making small talk and cracking jokes, trying to keep the situation light. You were appreciative because it was able to take your mind off the Jeon family.

But tiredness began to kick in. You walked over to the coffee vending machine, finding it wasn't working—just your luck. So you strolled back to the waiting room and heard someone softly call your name. You looked up to see a familiar face.

"Hi, sweetheart."

It became a familiar greeting from Jungkook's mom. She walked up to you and pulled you in for a hug. She held you a lot longer than you anticipated, and simply put; it was exactly what you needed right now. Your body crumbled into her frame, your head leaning on her shoulder, turning away from her, your eyes starting to pool with tears. You withdrew from her embrace, giving her the best smile you could when your eyes met hers. Immediately, you responded with, "I'm sorry."

She knitted her brows in confusion, tilting her head. "What are you apologizing for, sweetheart?" Her right hand cupped your cheek, her thumb gently wiping the tear that fell.

You were apologetic about Jungkook. Yuna not only lost her younger sibling, but his mother also lost her son. It was impossible not to feel responsible, and your glistening eyes and glum smile were enough for her to understand what you meant.

She gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "You do not need to apologize for Jungkookie. It's not your fault, do you hear me?" She cupped your face again, her eyes intently staring into yours, and you nodded in agreement. "Are you okay, sweetheart?"

You bit the inside of your cheek, unsure how to answer this question whenever someone asked. Should you smile through the pain and say you're fine? But you shook your head no.

"C'mere."

She drew you in for another embrace, gently caressing your hair and assuring you that everything would be fine and that you had nothing to worry about. Your small sniffles and silent weeping persisted as you reflected on your mother. How can someone unrelated to you adore you more than your so-called family? You had practically driven away this woman's son, but she told you it wasn't your fault. Yuna and Jungkook were so lucky to have someone who loved them as much as she did.

Growing up the way you did with your family, it was always hard to express your emotions, so you kept them bottled up and pushed them away like they didn't exist because you felt like you couldn't be your true self around those who were supposed to love you. It took a long time for you to open up to Yuna before you finally let yourself trust her–trust that she would be your person.

But with Yuna and Jungkook's mother, it was different. It felt like home, and it felt right–a place where you were welcomed and not judged. She had always made you feel that way.

You broke away from her hug, wiping your tears. God, you hated crying, and these last few months had been nothing but constant tears. You wondered how much you could bottle up before you erupted, spilling out years of suppressed emotions. Everything you had been carrying since you were a child until now weighed heavily. The deep ache in your heart was waiting for its final release.

"I wish I had left instead of him." 

Yuna's mother raised your chin with her index finger, her warm eyes meeting yours. "Jungkookie will come back. I know he will, but if you left," she paused, "I don't know if you would, sweetheart. We need you here–"

"No one needs–"

"We need you here," she repeated sternly. "Stop telling yourself otherwise." She gently patted your cheek before walking off to the receptionist.

You knew she was right. You knew how easy it would be for you to disappear off the face of the earth, start over and pretend like you didn't have a former life. But you loved your friends and your job, and those were the few things you could hold onto.

Jin set his phone down when you strolled back into the waiting room. He scanned your face before asking, "You good?"

You nodded yes. "I'm just tired," you explained, slouching beside him.

He patted his shoulder. "I hear these broad shoulders make for a great pillow," he smirked.

"I'll be fine, Jin."

"Oh, come on. Don't be so stubborn."

"I'm not stubborn."

"You are."

"I'm–"

Jin glared before using his chin to gesture to his shoulder. You rolled your eyes at the handsome man, sliding over to lay your head against him.

"See, it wasn't that hard, was it?" You were going to speak again, but he held his finger up. "Bup-bup-bup. It's sleepy time."

Eight hours since you arrived.

It felt like you were caught in a transitional state of consciousness between wakefulness and sleep, a feeling you hated because you didn't feel as well-rested when you awoke. Your mind wanders to the untapped subconscious abyss, along with ceaseless thoughts of the weirdest things.

You hummed when a light tap of your leg disrupted the stream of never-ending thoughts. Your eyelids, heavy from sleep, fluttered open to see the dad-to-be kneeling before you.

"Hey, you're here," you mutter, your voice still groggy as you sit up, nudging Jin awake.

"Do you guys wanna see the baby?"

Your eyes widened at his remark. Have you been asleep for that long? You could've sworn you were waiting forever while awake, but once you closed your eyes, Yuna and baby were here instantly.

Clearing your throat, you grabbed your belongings and kicked Jin one last time because he was taking his sweet time waking up. You followed Namjoon down the hall and through the secured doors. Faint crying from newborn babies echoed in your ears as you turned the corner into Yuna's room.

Your best friend was fast asleep in the hospital bed while her mother was holding her granddaughter, quietly humming a lullaby you so faintly remember her singing occasionally. The corners of her mouth curved into a smile as she handed the baby off to Namjoon.

He walked over, cradling the sweet newborn in his arms. She was adorned in a knitted lavender hat with a large bow while swaddled in a muslin blanket. She looked so warm and cozy, all bundled up. Your heart swelled, staring at this precious little human.

"Do you wanna hold her?" Namjoon asked, looking at the pair of you, and you nodded. Who wouldn't want to hold this sweet girl? He carefully handed her off to you. Soft grunts left her tiny mouth as she was placed into your arms.

"What name did you guys decide on?"

Namjoon smiled. "Indie. It's a bit unconventional, but she just looked like an Indie when we saw her."

You uttered her name before looking at Namjoon. "I love it."

Yuna's mother called out to Namjoon, asking him to help her prepare some food for Yuna.

You turned to Jin, bringing Indie closer to him. "Do you wanna hold her?"

He shook his head no. "Nah–I don't really like babies. They're not my thing."

You chuckled. "Don't say that, or you won't be her favorite uncle," you teased, returning your gaze to the sleeping baby.

"I have her whole life to win her over," Jin smirked, folding his arms across his chest. He tiptoed away, pretending to be distracted by something.

Indie grunted again, trying to stretch and wiggle in your arms. With her eyes still closed, she smiled briefly before resting her expression. You continued gazing at this perfect little person who just entered the world, who knew nothing of hurt, pain, or loss, and you wanted to keep it that way for as long as possible–keep her innocence and purity. You wanted to protect her at all costs, love her so she would never doubt herself. Support her in everything she wanted to try, make every dream of hers come true. How could you want all of this for someone you'd just met? How could you love this little one so much when you knew nothing about her, and she wasn't even yours?

By extension, she was family. She'll call you Auntie, come to you for advice when she can't go to her mom or dad, ask you to take her shopping, and you'd do everything and more–you'd spoil her like she was your own.

Your lips quivered, eyes welling up with tears as you brought baby Indie closer, your cheek nuzzled against her head. This could've been you holding your baby, but it wouldn't have been the right situation to bring a baby into the world. Even though you were sure you'd love your baby, you wanted to be in a better place. A baby deserves a family that would love them and go to great lengths for them, and you didn't have that at the time with U-jin.

But with Jungkook, it would've been different if you were pregnant. You sat with daydreams too often about what kind of father he'd be. You imagined he'd play with them all day until it wore them out, and they were too tired to play. He would sneak them snacks and candies when you weren't looking. And like you, he'd fight to build the best life for them. However, these 

daydreams were nothing but that–reveries of things never coming true.

"Hey, are you okay? What's wrong?" Namjoon asked with knitted brows.

You exhaled deeply, hugging her again before returning her to Namjoon. "Yeah–yeah, I'm okay. I'm just so happy for the three of you." You turned away to wipe your tears, catching a glimpse of Jin trying not to catch you at this moment, but it was too late.

Namjoon took Indie, sitting on his makeshift bed, quietly shushing her and rocking in place to keep her asleep. He and Yuna have come a long way, and you couldn't be more ecstatic to go on this new journey and see them become parents.

You walked over to sit in the chair next to Yuna's. She was beginning to stir awake, still groggy from labor. Her eyes fluttered open, her lips curving into a smile. "Hey," she muttered, trying to shift into a sitting position.

"Hey. How are you feeling, mama?"

Yuna chuckled. "Mama. I'm going to have to get used to that." You smiled and nodded yes. "I'm tired. I just pushed a seven-pound bowling ball out of a tiny opening."

You laughed. "You did great." You looked over at Namjoon, then back to Yuna. "Are you ready for another one?" You couldn't help but tease.

"Oh god–if Namjoon goes anywhere near me, I will murder him. I can't do this again."

"I'm sure you'll change your mind," Namjoon chirped, standing to rock Indie in his arms.

You rolled your eyes and shook your head at your favorite couple. You were sure they would have more kids in the future, and you could see them with at least one more.

Turning to Yuna, you held her hand. "Do you need anything before I go?"

She shook her head, looking at her mom, who finished preparing her meal. She placed her hand on top of yours, squeezing it.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For being here. I couldn't have done this without you."

You chuckled. "That's what best friends are for, right? We do everything together, even have babies." You stood, leaning to kiss the top of her head. "Get some rest, okay? Let me know when you get home, so I can visit and hold baby Indie while you and Namjoon sleep."

She hummed, pressing her lips together, squeezing your hand one last time. "Love you."

"Love you too."

Jin offered to take you home, and you couldn't help but laugh a little because he probably wanted an excuse to leave and not have to be around the new parents-to-be and their baby. You understood it, though not everyone is comfortable around babies and children.

The ride home was quiet, which was surprising. You thought he'd at least have one more dad joke in his pocket, ready to go. He pulled to a stop in front of your place. You turned to thank him for the ride, but the desolate expression on his face made you pause.

"Everything okay?"

He cleared his throat. "Can I ask why you were upset at the hospital?"

The reasons could go on for hours, but you wouldn't subject Jin to listening to you rattle on about your problems. "I'm just going through a lot right now."

"Is it because I mentioned Jungkook? I realized now that it was insensitive of me to tell you even though you didn't ask to hear about him."

"It's fine, Jin. Don't worry about–"

"No, please let me apologize." Your lips thinned into a straight line, nodding to let him continue. "I'm sorry. I knew you wouldn't ask about him, and I can only imagine what you're going through. Just to let you know, I'm also mad at him for leaving like that. You didn't deserve that, and you at least deserved a goodbye in person."

"We both hurt each other, so I understand why he did what he did, and I'm not mad at him for leaving like he did. I'd be gone if I wasn't working on this new TV show.

"You can't leave. You're not allowed to."

You laughed. "And what do you need me for?"

Jin shrugged. "I don't know. I have to think about it." You smiled, hanging your head down, and he nudged your arm, making you peer at him. "Don't be a stranger. Call me if you need anything–a midnight snack, someone to watch a movie with, whatever, it doesn't matter. I'll be there. We're friends, okay?"

When you didn't respond, he gave you a threatening look. "Okay, okay. Yes, I'll call if I need anything." You grabbed your things, ready to open the door.

Jin grabbed your wrist. "Hey, you're gonna be fine."

You forced a smile and hummed. You knew how you were feeling, and where you are right now was not where you'd always be. It could take days, weeks, or months to be genuinely okay. But you would be, eventually.

✨ next ~ drabble ~ it'll be okay (jk pov)

[fonulyn]

20 Questions for Fic Authors

thanks for the tag @thebrandywine 💖

answers under the cut.

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

268 works.

2. What is your AO3 wordcount?

1,256,253 words.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

RE. and still have the urge to write Gears but lol if you thought nivannedy was a rare pair...

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

nobody's perfect (TOG, pretty gen)

now drunk on lust I drown in you (forever within I'm lost in you) (RE, Chreon)

and who's to find the way right through you (RE, Chreon)

scattered fragments of time (that's all we are) (RE, Chreon)

how to accidentally get adopted - a guide by Piers Nivans (RE, Piers-centric, also background Chreon)

5. Do you respond to comments?

always! i know i missed a couple, sometimes i take ages, but i do always try to respond bc i love and cherish nice comments.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

the bad endings on three words to last forever. i still like the angstiest one the most :'D

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

lmao like everything else idk i want them happy. i've written loads of fluff idk how to quantify which is the happiest.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

only ever got a few nasty comments thankfully, so no, not really.

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?

yeppp. idk what does 'which kind' mean? anything that feels inspiring lol.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?

not really. i did start a few back in the day but i didn't really finish them. i am not really into crossovers tbh i don't even read them 99% of the time.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yeah. someone was selling it on amazon pffth.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

a few. apparently five on ao3 lol but i think there was one or two back in the lj days too. might be wrong tho :'D

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

lol loads. at one point in life like... fifteen years ago, most things i wrote were co-written with a friend. and i've done it a couple of times after that too. i really like co-op stuff tbh but haven't found people to collab with lately.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

right now i would sell my soul for nivannedy. might already have.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

ehhhh at this moment i doubt i'll ever finish anything. maybe the lifeguard au? i was red-hot for the idea at first but then it kinda... fizzled out. kept changing. got ruined by pushy ppl lol. but maybe i'll get back to it one day bc i would love a nivannedy summer romance tbh.

16. What are your writing strengths?

uhm. characterization. dialogue. emotional shit? idk i think i do best when i have intimate moments with two people. tiny everyday moments and mundane shit. like that. if i get going writing sometimes flows super well and i think i can get consistently readable stuff done in one go. but that'd require getting going lol.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

action. i suck at action. i also suck at it in the way that i can't actually make myself start writing. i got way too co-dependent when i still had people excitedly participating in the process and now i sit here sad doing nothing :'D but anyway. writing action and having some self-discipline lol.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

depends very heavily on the context. in general i do think it should be all in one language for readability but there are exceptions. i've done it too lol but it was only like a line or two in finnish :'D

19. First fandom you wrote for?

diru, twenty years ago lmao, it's like a different lifetime. i only learned of the existence of fanfic at the ripe old age of nineteen lol but yeah it's still been so long now.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

asdjfngkn i can not choose between all of my children c'mon. uhm. am just gonna say the self-indulgent series bc it truly was so important to me for so long and i'm still devastated it ended. sigh. now i made myself sad again :'D

[lesbianwyllravengard]

20 questions for fic authors!

I was tagged by the lovely @ugetelynx and @wisecrackingeric-2 <3 so sorry it took me so long to do this hfsgjhdj

1. How many works do you have? - currently posted on ao3 I have 57 works total. However I have almost twice as many wips it's bad

2. Ao3 word count? - 395,068 ..... I've got a wip that's almost over 100k but it's also been there for years so I doubt that'll change anytime soon

3. What fandoms do you write for? - of the fics I have on ao3, I have written for detroit become human, star wars, resident evil, assassin's creed, and the last kingdom. The fandoms I've written for that are not on my ao3 include lotr/the hobbit, bbc sherlock, bbc merlin, marvel, voltron legendary defender, percy jackson universe, and whatever the Carry On by rainbow rowell fandom is called. Most of those I will never ever write for again lmao

4. What are your top five fics by kudos? - In order:

Sapphire Moonlight (Tequila Sunrise) (Serennedy)

We Look So Good (Reed900)

Hold Fast, the Suns Will Rise (Stay) (Dincobb) (also, my first fic ever posted, and still the fic I hold most dearly in my heart to this day)

We Are Home (Hank and Connor family content)

Tomato Soup (Serennedy)

5. Do you respond to comments? - every single one. I'm obsessed with comments. I have them all saved and stored so I can reread them at any time. Thank you everyone who has ever commented I love you

6. What fic did you write the angstiest ending for? - I only write angst with a happy ending. But I did write You Should Have Killed Me for a friend's dbh x hunger games simulator result and it had an angsty ending by result of being a hunger games simulator.

7. What fic did you write the happiest ending for? - I write many fics w happy endings, but I personally think my fic series Din and Grogu | the Clan of Two Trilogy has the happiest ending because it happened against all odds. It's a fic about Din and Grogu's found family (before BoBF and Mando s3 came out, so it's not canon accurate) and it ends meaningfully to me.

8. Do you get hate on fics? - I have before, but it was all bullshit that showed me the person commenting didn't actually read what I wrote but chose to get mad at something that didn't exist. So it was discarded easily. Otherwise, I've had people try to tell me how to write things, but I ignore them all

9. Do you write smut? - yes. badly.

10. Crossovers? - I wrote a dincobb fic that was set in Assassin's Creed: Odyssey, with Din as Kassandra and Cobb as Anais. I also started a serennedy fic set in the detroit: become human universe but never got anywhere close to finishing it.

11. Ever had a fic stolen? - not that I know of lol.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? - I had someone ask to translate one of my fics, and I said yes, but I don't think they've done so yet, which is fine. Other than that, no. But I'd be honoured!

13. Ever co-wrote a fic before? - I started a dincobb fic with a friend years ago but we never got around to finishing it. Someday I still hope to.

14. What's your all time favourite ship? - that's genuinely impossible to pick tbh I've had so many that rewired my brain. top three are probably bagginshield, simarkus, and shadowzel, not in any particular order.

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will? - ehhhhh probably the klance fic I started when I was like 15. I don't go to voltron anymore and literally couldn't care less about it. In fact I actively hate it.

16. What are your writing strengths? - I've been told that I'm good at characterisation and plot. I think I suck at plot severely. As for characterisation, I study characters really hard and take a long time to write fics so they remain in character so I'm glad people appreciate that. I also prefer writing dialogue to anything else.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? - Writing. haha I mean exposition.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language? I have before, I find it fun but also intimidating.

19. First fandom you wrote for? - The Hobbit :') my first ever fic was a bagginshield fic I started when I was 13. I still mean to finish it someday.

20. Favourite fic you've written? - *sighs* I guess I should say Another Time. It was the most fun to write, and everyone's responses have made all the difficulties of writing it endlessly worth it. It took me months but I'm so happy I finished it, and I'm working on p3 rn I PROMISE. But again the fic I hold most dearly in my heart is still Hold Fast, the Suns Will Rise (Stay)

[needcake]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!

Thank you for the tag @shachaai!!

Anyone who wants to do it, please feel free to steal!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

42! Some older stuff didn't make the jump from ff.net and lj to ao3

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

357,987, half of that is for universal river alone haha

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Right now mainly Hetalia, but I used to write a lot of Naruto some ten years ago. I also dabbled a little with Captain America, Star Trek, Inuyasha and some other random fandoms over the years

4. Top five fics by kudos?

In this universal river - 196

Such sound and fury - 157

Contagious - 115

I hope this finds you well - 107

Arthur's obligatory day off - 104

Considering that these are all one-shots and universal river is currently 28 chapters long, I'd place it much lower on this list lol

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! Might take me a while because I like to do it from my computer instead of my phone, but I try to reply as quickly as possible. I feel so guilty over some older comments that I never replied to that I try to be on top of it as much as possible.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Mmmmmmm I think it's a tie between the For now we see through a glass, darkly and I held sugar between my fingertips, under water

As much as I like a cathartic ending, I really do enjoy a pit of despair every once in a while (The earth devours is also going to have a sort of bleak ending lol)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Such sound and fury and Old new beginnings, as in they don't end in a compromise or in a vague hopeful note. Characters went through the process and came out better for it on the other end. That's always a happy ending to me.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I received some, usually from England fans who think I'm massacring their boy

9. Do you write smut?

Yesss, smut is a lot of fun!

10. Craziest crossover?

I'm not really big on crossovers :(

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

That I know of, once. It was a Naruto NaruHina fic that a friend of mine found cross-posted on orkut, some kid thought it was good and wanted her friends to see it. I asked her to take it down and direct people to the ff.net page but I stopped following up on that after a while. This was of course some 15 years ago XD

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

A faery song was translated into Chinese! But I'm not super comfortable with translations, specially when people ask me if it's ok to post them in different platforms. I'd rather keep it all on Ao3 where I can see what it's being used for.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

@rein-ette and I did a collaboration on a Tokyo Olympics series and I also did a collaboration with @rosesandalfazemas where I wrote two pieces and she provided beautiful art <3

14. All time favourite ship?

Engport and McKirk <3

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Mmmmm I used to have two Naruto fics that I always hoped to finish but I have long accepted I'm never going back to them again lol and because of that I try to never go into bigger projects without having finished the full draft, so that exact same thing doesn't happen again. So yeah, might take me some time but I still hope to finish In this universal river and The earth devours haha

16. What are your writing strengths?

I've been told it's description, which I find funny because I always think I'm doing a terrible job at it lol but to me it's managing the tension. It's something I adore doing and I try to be better at it with every new fic.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions lol I feel like if I were writing any kind of original fiction instead of fanfiction based on a pre-existing work no one would know what my characters looked like apart from eye and hair color lol

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Eeeeh I'm kinda iffy about it. When used right, in the right context and with actual meaning within the narrative I think it can be cool as hell, but having Naruto as my main background I cannot tell you the amount of random japanese thrown in for effect that made no sense and pissed me offfffffff, so yeah, I don't really love it. For many years Hetalia was also plagued by this and I have to admit I did it too. I was learning russian back in college and I thought it'd be cool to throw in some russian in a fic, only to receive a comment telling me I shouldn't use google translate and that the word I used was feminine and not masculine as it should be. Which is, you know, the kind of mistake you make when you're learning a new language and haven't fully grasped gender rules yet. I felt so ashamed after that that I never tried it again lol

I will say this though, sometimes I prefer when people don't use foreign words when it's just thrown in there. I speak English as a second language and I don't mix it up with Portuguese unless I'm tired and/or drunk. I'd rather writers give me a reason why these characters are suddenly reverting to their mother-language and use that to add to the plot instead of just randomly throwing stuff there to give it a foreign color.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

Inuyasha!! Back in 2004! I wrote a behemoth of 38 chapters and posted it all in one thing thing on ff.net (I later cleaned it up and fixed it with 38 chapters lol)

20. Favourite fic you've written?

Forget-me-nots, 1212: fever dream (part of the 2021 whumptober) and And he became a pillar of salt (part of the 2023 hetaberia week) :)

[lunarriviera]

2023 ao3 wrapped

last year @programmedradly and i asked each other some questions, rather than try to field the entire thing. so we did the same thing this year! and here are my answers. i had a wild little annus mirabilis and somehow posted more work than i ever have before, so there was lots to choose from.

•

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

tragically, one of my dead doves: the wu xie/li cu fic “you bear your scars, you've done your time.” no one reads it because it's an age-gap pairing, and it's inherently tragic (post-sha hai fucked-up wu xie). it has 17 whole kudos and it fought for every one. but like a lot of my badwrong pairings, it's honestly some of my best writing. i wrote it fast and the action scenes are solid, the dialogue is good and even funny, and the sex scenes are miserable and scorching. oh well, they can put it in my norton critical edition after i'm dead lol.

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

readers seemed to like the pingxie kissing fic, which was funny to me because it's literally just…kissing. (i wanted to put in plot and/or sex but mumble was very stern with me: “this is a KISSING fic.”) i guess we all are still battered by canon and just want wu xie dozing by the carp pool and getting kissed.

6. Favorite title you used?

“the subtle fire," with its title from the calamus poems by walt whitman; all its subheadings are from whitman too. sadly otherwise this was the year of taylor, and i exhausted midnights and all the vault tracks. new year's resolution: moratorium on fic titles from tay.

8. Pairing you wrote the most for this year?

somehow there were 18 dmbj fics. 😳 pingxie won out with 9 fics, followed by 6 heihua fics and then a smattering of rare pairs (not to say dead doves lol). there were 5 under the skin fics; at this point i post one of those like every two damm weeks because i'm down that bad.

10. What work was the quickest to write?

probably either of my drabbles—a little rpf prose poem for zhu yilong/unnamed photographer (still my most beloved pairing) or shen wei smoking a cigarette and zhao yunlan being horrified (and a little turned on).

11. What work took you the longest to write?

without a doubt, the 31k guardian fic i just posted. i got freaked out by its complexity and dropped it for a year, and then had to TOIL over all the canon details, because i didn't remember ANYTHING apparently (zhang shi who? fu you? li qian? what?). it took for fucking EVER to finish and i will NEVER write such a plotty monster again. the worst part was when ma gui randomly said, “oh there's a fifth hallow” at which point i was like “there's a WHAT NOW.” ironically that turned out to be the title. i hate characters that TALK and SAY SHIT.

15. What WIP are you taking into next year with you?

the pingxie epic 😭 i'm not sure if i even can ever finish it because it involves google searches like “recent tomb discoveries china” and “can you survive c4 explosion.” also it'll be another dead dove because it starts with wu xie divorcing bai haotian, and the iron triangle being broken up. and that's just the beginning. everyone will hate it, and instead read cute fics about liu sang being a fox, probably.

17. Your favorite character to write this year?

it's gotta be du cheng from under the skin. he embodies what is turning into my favorite character archetype, Big Dumb Hot Cop. so butch. so loyal. so stupid. just a blast to narrate. wu xie and hei xiazi have similar idiot energy but are also paradoxically very intelligent so that's more challenging. (writing xiaoge's dialogue is difficult as fuck. he can't just say "wu xie" ALL the time.)

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

possibly, after everything, the end (for me) of the zhu yilong/unnamed photographer series. other people may keep adding to it but i needed to let them go. they exist in such a liminal unsettled never-together bittersweet place for me and i felt grateful to have spent time with them, as weird as that is to say. i'll always love unnamed photographer, and his aesthetic yearning. MY ONE RPF SHIP THAT WENT CANON. 😭

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

indulging myself and submitting a few:

Even Huos had to sleep sometime, or hang upside down, or whatever it was they did to restore themselves. [x]

•

Once he has him flat on his back again, with breathtaking pragmatism Shen Yi drips lube all over him, sinks down on him and then rides him so hard Du Cheng sees not just stars but entire constellations. [x]

•

Xiaoge kissed his hair. "Hold still," he said, and Wu Xie could do that, no problem. He fell asleep that way, curled against Xiaoge’s naked skin, and dreamed he was watching Xiaoge plant moss in the moss garden, in impossible colors: turquoise, bright orange. A richly saturated luminous violet. [x]

•

Xiazi added so much condensed milk to Xie Yuchen’s coffee that he finally had to arrest his hand forcibly. “Stop trying to give me diabetes.” Xiazi’s smile was worse than the cloying milk. “It’s to match the sweetness in your soul, my little flower." “Oh my god,” said Xie Yuchen faintly, as Geya listened, to all appearances visibly entertained. “What do you want? Because I assume you want something. Money? Work? Is this a hostage situation?” Xiazi just smiled harder, but at least he put the milk down, in favor of giving Xie Yuchen another pain au chocolat. “Why does he get all the pastry?” Geya said, sounding disappointed. “It’s to build his strength,” Hei Xiazi told him, and the patently, horribly uxorious look on Xiazi’s face made Xie Yuchen want to hit someone.) [x]

•

Xiao Hua manages to bite back a tart comment about how challenging it is to keep looking younger than forty when one’s companion will never look any older. It takes more than expensive rose hip and argan oil and ceramides; it takes never skipping the gym, and always skipping dessert. It means going to bed at nine-thirty when he’d rather stay up reading, and above all it means not letting Hei Xiazi know about any of these little maneuvers, lest it not seem effortless. [x]

•

As Wu Xie started enthusiastically laying out the details—and why was he awake at this miserable hour?—Hei Xiazi pulled the pillow away from his face and started gently hitting Xie Yuchen with it. “Wu Xie, let me call you back later,” he said, arresting the pillow’s movement with one hand. “I have something I have to deal with here.” “Sure,” said Wu Xie, cheerful. Then: “I bought Pangzi an espresso machine, and he taught me how to use it! Xiaoge’s not here, I wish he’d come home. I had five cups! You should take Hei Xiazi with you, just in case things get complicated. They might. Get complicated, I mean. I'll tell you all about it. When will you call me?” Xie Yuchen fought not to laugh. “After sunrise, probably. Drink some water. And tell Pangzi I’m going to kill him.” [x]

•

Su Wan seems lost in thought for a minute. “I always thought maybe one day I would like guys, but I don’t.” Li Cu elbows him. “What about Hei-ye?” Su Wan looks horrified. “Yali, no! What a thought!” “Okay, okay,” says Li Cu, and drunkenly tousles his hair. “Calm down.” Yang Hao puts out his hand for the bottle. “Hei-ye is pretty cool, though,” he says, which is high praise from him. It’s true. They sit without saying anything for a moment, in silent contemplation of Hei Xiazi’s inarguable coolness. [x]

•

The things about you that other people find unsettling, those have somehow never bothered Wu Xie. You’re spooky, Hei Xiazi told you frankly, once. I am too, but I drown it out by talking. You’re so silent, our little Yaba Zhang. People are afraid of you. Xiazi had been right, and you knew it. But Wu Xie has never been afraid of you, not even once. You think about the first time you came back from behind the gate, how furious and desperate he’d been to know why you hadn’t come straight back to him. Demanding answers, wanting to know why you went, what you saw. And you remember gazing back at him, still mute with the magnitude of it. He could never have understood, but no one could, not even Wu Xie whose intelligence shone as clearly as an aura around him, glowing, burnished—still innocent, still young enough to be passionate. Whereas even at the time you felt every single one of your hundred years lying on you like a burden, like fallen trees pressing you into the loam, the moss, the muck. [x]

•

He’s still half-asleep, is the only thing that could possibly explain why Zhao Yunlan ducks under some low-slung branches and strolls right up to the water’s edge only to see Shen Wei, stripped naked, hip-deep in a pool of still clear water, combing through his unbraided hair with his fingers. Why is this a surprise. What was he thinking. And above all, why is he still walking towards him on automatic, as if drawn toward him, as if not caring whether Shen Wei would see him or stop— Shen Wei startles and looks up, motion arrested. He’s bent at the waist, rinsing bits of dirt and bracken from his hair, skin glowing like wet marble, and Zhao Yunlan suddenly wants him so badly he couldn’t make a fist if he had to. Shen Wei smiles, and Zhao Yunlan will never get enough of that smile, artless and full-hearted. All he can do is smile back, helplessly. [x]

[heymrspatel]

✨ artist interview ✨

i was tagged by @you-are-so-much-better-than-that @mikhailoisbaby and @deathclassic to do this artist interview that chrissy whipped up off of the popular fic writer one! thanks for the tag even if i feel like a grand ol' imposter 😅

1. Do you post on Ao3? If so, how many works do you have on AO3? If not, where do you post? i do! i didn't before, but i was bullied by tumblr into doing so after they took down the art for "cinematic" lmao! then the pals encouraged me to upload the rest! i have 4 works: cinematic, kinktober, gallacrafts, and original art.

2. What is your total art count? 83! (including the zine stickers/tattoos)

3. What are your top 5 pieces by likes/kudos? i used the helpful stats website @suzy-queued suggested!

4. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? yes! i still think it's insane when people choose to leave nice comments, so i try my best to respond!

5. What is your current fandom, and what was the first fandom you drew for? shameless, hi. if we're talking about art that i've shared, then it's also shameless. but the first one just for fun was harry potter (yeaaa yeaaa 🙄)

6. Have you ever received hate on any art? yep lol

7. What’s a fandom/ship you haven’t drawn for yet but want to? i guess the true answer is none. however, i get the urge to draw every time i watch something that i end up loving. recently i've wanted to draw for young royals and stranger things, but i never ended up doing anything. i would also be too shy to post 😅

8. What’s your all-time favorite ship? i've had many, but based on impact and inspiration i'd have to go with ian and mickey 💙

9. Do you draw outside of fandom? i do!! it's my favorite hobby! the only difference is that outside of this space i usually just sketch. so it's very different than what i share here.

10. What’s the an art piece you’ve drawn that came out completely differently than you expected? oh probably this one! it changed quite a bit and was originally drawn flipped around. i think it tells a different story depending on which way you look at it!

11. Do you draw smut? yes! the teasing kind. the "what's that hand doing?!" kind lmao

12. Have you ever had any of your art stolen or copied? not that i know of!

13. Have you ever collaborated on a piece? yea! i've collabed on art for fics with @whatwouldmickeydo and @metalheadmickey and on the zine and timeline with @you-are-so-much-better-than-that 🥰

14. What’s an idea you have that you have yet to draw? omg i have an entire list of ideas that just exist and may never come to life lol! they range from extreme fluff to absolute filth... my notes app: -kiss on the cheek/scrunchy face -mickey's head hanging off bed/mouth open/ian's hand wrapped around the nape of his neck -holding hands at the alibi alsdkfjlk

15. What are your drawing strengths? i would say adding details and tying the story i'm trying to convey together. and i like to think that i'm ok at giving them that tender and in love feel no matter the situation.

16. What are your drawing weaknesses? all of it? haha proportions and certain angles are really hard for me. hands and noses yikes! i am also terrible at drawing from memory. i usually draw with about 20 references pulled up on my laptop. like, i am the bozo googling "table". 17. What’s your favorite art piece you’ve drawn? it's gotta be the roadtrip one! but i also really really love this one:

18. What is one thing you’d like to tell people about your art that they might not know? i love adding/repeating little details that no one would really notice unless you're zooming all the way in or seeing a few pieces as a set. i built a color palette very early on that has stayed consistent throughout. i play a lot with blues and greens as a motif. and uh i'm still learning! everyday! with every single one!

19. What inspires or motivates you to create for fandom? i genuinely love doing it! i also love a prompt, that's why i started all of this with gallacrafts. and i just really love putting them in situations i want to see them in and drawing them stupidly in love!

but, i also hoard unhinged tags in my cheeks like a chipmunk lmao every series i've done was born from people screaming a version of "YOU'RE INSANE" at me 😂

20. And finally, can you describe your process a little? Do you have a favourite place to draw? Do you play something in the background? Do you do research or just go for it? Give us a little insight. i usually draw on the couch, hunched over like a shrimp. i’m normally up really late (i see 3am too often) and that’s when i get most of my work done. i typically watch something i've seen before so that i don't have to fully pay attention or i'll listen to music. i sketch a rough draft of what i want the final piece to end up looking like, then i do a shit ton of research and pull up a stupid amount of references. i have a really creepy pinterest board full of body parts lol! then i fight for my life and rage until the line work is fully done. after that, it’s smooth sailing with coloring and shading 😌

i'm feeling a little tag shy, but i'll tag @gallawitchxx @doodlevich @y0itsbri and @grumpymickmilk if you want to play! if not i'm just giving you some flowers 💐

[rythmicjea]

20 Questions (plus a bonus) for Fic Authors

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

24

2. What is your AO3 wordcount?

222,958

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Currently: Riverdale (and I have an ongoing Zack & Cody fic)

Past: Doctor Who, The Magicians, and Star Wars

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Haven't broken 100 kudos on a fic yet but I'm close!

I. My Dearest Korkie with 91

II. 6-2-4-8-4-6-3 with 75

III. Plums and Mugs with 70

IV. Casualty with 69

V. Kindness in Lies with 54

5. Do you respond to comments?

Every. Single. One. I love them. Fuck me up with questions about what you've just read. If it's not spoiler-y then I'm happy to explain. Hell, even if it might be a tad spoiler-y I still will lol.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Oof... that would probably be a tie between We Had Fun (the main character just straight up kills people) or We Belong Together (where it seems like the couple doesn't actually end up together, but I promise they do!).

7. What is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I love making people cry. I used to say "if you're not crying, I didn't do my job". But um... do WIPs count if I already know how they are going to end? lol

I'm going to say for finished I Only Have Eyes For You (This will make you cry) and The Magician Queen (this is a classic Holiday Hallmark Happy Ending)

For WIP (that is actually finished I'm just not posting all at once) The Suite Adult Life

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not yet. I welcome thoughtful critiques though!

9. Do you write smut? If so, which kind?

LMAO. By looking at my repertoire you would think the answer is "no". However, I literally wrote a collection of short stories just to write smut. It ended up more tame than expected and very romantic. BUT I do have some pretty explicit scenes in some stories.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?

No. I've just not been inspired and I tend to stay away from reading crossovers.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't think so!

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No :(

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but I've tried to get people to write with me.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

OMG that's like asking who my favorite child is? I mean that's just so unfair- it's Jeronica. Jughead/Veronica is my heart and soul. 80 years of sexual tension just can't be beat lol.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I hate to say it but... I don't have any. I think Not Another Riverdale Love Story (nicknamed Narwals) is the closest. But I know how it's going to end and I just posted chapter 7 and am currently working on chapter 10. OO! I know, it's pure porn. Just pr0n all day long. Rockin Around The Christmas Tree. I have two out of the four chapters posted. I have the last chapter 75% of the way finished. I just have to write smut for one pairing and then it'll be finished.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Existing dialogue and minute details. I like to use and reimagine current dialogue of the shows into my stories. And I drop blink and you miss them hints throughout.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Smut. I've gotten a lot of compliments but I still think I suck at it lol.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I'm pretty good at French but I love writing dialogue in another language. I don't write whole scenes in it. But I have two characters that know passible Japanese so I dropped some in a chapter. But I make sure to translate in the ending A/N.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Sailor Moon!! All the way back when NO ONE knew what fanfiction was.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Oh goodness... I love them all for different reasons. I think if I were to do this as Word Association it would be My Dearest Korkie. It's G-rated and less than 400 words but packs a punch! I think it really proves that a G-rated short short story can be just as good as a 300k+ multi-chapter E rated fic.

Bonus Question

21. What story of yours do you think needs more love?

The Suite Adult Life - I wrote this without knowing the show existed until I was suggested clips on YouTube. I never watched the clips, I just did one google search, read one synopsis, and one relationship timeline. Then out popped 100k+ words... I'm still kind of baffled by it lol.

Tagging- anyone else who wants to participate!

[hilarychuff]

for the ask game :)

i carry it in mine + 3, 13, 14

howl + 9, 15

the ask game

ty for the questions!!

i carry it in mine - tag, ao3

3. what’s your favorite line of narration?

hmm it currently stands at 45k words so hard to pick just one but i'm p sure this was the line that i was like first working towards when i started writing it

He means to make me queen, she thinks, her legs turning to jelly as she sinks to the floor.

like the scenes in chapter 6 and 7 at the wall where he shows her his mark/she realizes the full implications of it all were for sure like one of THEEEE inciting visuals i had

13. what music did you listen to, if any, to get in the mood for writing this story? or if you didn’t listen to anything, what do you think readers should listen to to accompany us while reading?

i actually write mostly in silence 😭 i can plot and write notes etc with the tv on or with music on but honestly i usually find it too distracting!!! i'm a big singer alonger and i really need to like. concentrate for the most part when i'm writing for real. nooooo clue what would be a good soundtrack for reading bc i would want vibes to be similar to like medieval period piece stuff so maybe something sort of instrumental???? or like a softly crooning female singer songwriter type of vibe. something a lil folksy perhaps???

actually wait i lied sometimes i listen to asmr videos on youtube!!! not that i recommend that per se lmao. but just a lil something to provide a bit of sensory stimulation so that i don't get like. bored.

14. is there anything you wanted readers to learn from reading this fic?

hmmmm. i don't think i went into this fic with the intention of like "this is what i want readers to learn" so much as i was like wouldn't if be interesting if... and then if their places were switched....

but i will say that something i didn't expect while writing was how many people would be upset with jon in the beginning for not making sansa his priority number one. which i GET like it's a soulmate fic that's sort of the expectation and it's an uneven expectation because he knows something here that sansa doesn't. but i always kind of felt like.... sure sansa is something different to him here than in canon but at least in the beginning the love is very much the same and exists and always existed???? and i could have done a better job writing TO that if i wanted it to be clear but i think it never occurred to me that it wouldn't be. it's so clear to me in canon how much jon loves his family, including sansa, even though we never actually see them interact for ourselves. but the way he thinks about her is so sweet. and the memories he has of her are very tender.

i think probably for the most part anyone who stuck around found a way to move past that if it felt wrong/unfair to them but i guess if i had one thing i wanted people to learn it would be sometimes that your ability to help someone or be there for them is not always a reflection of the love that you have for them. sometimes circumstances are just complicated. sometimes there's nothing you can do. but that doesn't mean you don't love someone and have love for them and hurt for them and think about them etcetcetc.

i am very much a problem solver in my own life/relationships which i think frustrates people sometimes and also sometimes leaves me feeling useless if someone is upset about something and there's nothing i can do but sometimes just loving someone and making sure they know that is enough !!! not that jon does that either in the beginning i guess lol woops but he's very much a sad boy ok maybe cut him some slack 😭

howl - tag, ao3

9. were there any alternate versions of this fic?

WELL the first howl i banged out in literally a 72 hour period cribbing heavily from an old scream script i found online that wasn't quiiteeee screen accurate and there was only ever one version of that. BUT in the larger grand scheme sense of this i do have notes for a howl 3 and howl 4 so like. not alt versions but additional installments in theory!!

i think there in the initial like "casting" phase if you will i had different notions for what howl 2 would be. bc joffrey was an obvious billy but i was like then who is stu.... and then finagling howl 1 meant some changes for howl 2 but honestly those felt really right to me when i settled on them!!!!!

as for howl 3 that casting has also taken a LOT of finagling that probably still needs some ironing out so that has probably gone through a couple different mental makeovers about how exactly to handle the roman/john milton of it all but rest assured i have lots of thoughts!!!!!!

15. what did you learn from writing this fic?

WELL!!!! actually!!!!! one thing that always bugged me about scream 2 was sidney being an actress and doing theater when it felt so like antithetical to her character to put herself in the spotlight in any capacity. but it's so like baked into the movie that doing howl 2 i was like ok how do i keep it??? and in thinking about that for sansa i considered a lot about the interiority of the character and how like. sure it's putting yourself in the spotlight. but it's also an opportunity to step out of yourself and be somebody different which i think both sidney and sansa are really craving, especially when stab/knifed is putting them on a national stage in a lot of ways. so that was something i hadn't really thought about before!!

i also think there are lots of times watching a horror movie where you see a character doing something and you're like "NO WHY ARE YOU DOING THAT WHY AREN'T YOU DOING XYZ INSTEAD" and then when you're making it like prose narrative as opposed to a script and you're in their head you really have to make it make sense to yourself a lot more (like not just running away after the police car crash scene in scream 2/howl 2) and so that was something i felt like i learned more about too like. yes sometimes you are making a decision because it serves the plot. but also how can you reconcile that action with your character's needs/wants/turmoils/experience etc.