#loki baby i'm sorry your writing is shit
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smhalltheurlsaretaken Ā· 10 months ago
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if you want to see tom hiddleston playing a character with depth and character development and writing that actually match his excellent acting skills might I suggest The Empty Crown. The sheer magnetism of his Prince Hal/Henry V made me root for the English against the French lol
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avastrasposts Ā· 1 year ago
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The Pilot and his girl - ch 11
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Now we're getting into the fun part! šŸ˜‹ The metaphorical shit is about to hit the fan as Frankie and our reader get ready for their one year anniversary on September 26, 2013. I had a lot of "fun" writing this chapter and I hope you enjoy it even though I'm now taking a seriously hard left turn with this series, away from the fluffy little bubble I've wrapped us in. The warnings will contain spoilers so I've put them in a separate post and will update them as I go: Warnings
Word count: 6.2 k
Chapter 12
Chapter 1, if you want to catch up from the beginning
Taglist: @pimosworld @i-own-loki @casa-boiardi @littlenosoul @stormseyer @mxtokko Ā @javicstories
ā€œCariƱo! Iā€™ve got to go now, come kiss me!ā€ Frankie calls through the apartment as he pulls on his boots, hastily tying them up before he tugs on his jacket. ā€œCarinooooooo!ā€ he wails, ā€œcome kiss me goodbye, I canā€™t leave if you donā€™t kiss me!ā€Ā 
You spit out the toothpaste and rush to rinse your mouth, before opening the bathroom door, looking over at your baby of a boyfriend whoā€™s currently standing by the door, bag in hand, making puppy eyes at you. ā€œCariƱoooooo!" he wails impatiently while you pad over to him on bare feet, shaking your head.Ā 
ā€œYouā€™re such a baby, Francisco Morales,ā€ you wrap your arms around his neck as he bends down and gives you a wet kiss on your lips before trailing more wet kisses down your throat.Ā 
ā€œI canā€™t leave if you donā€™t kiss me,ā€ he gives you a fake pout as he stands up. ā€œYouā€™re sure youā€™re ok to pack everything up on your own? Iā€™ll be back as soon as possible so we can just load into the truck and go.ā€Ā 
ā€œYeah, itā€™s fine, Iā€™ll do some laundry and pack the last of the food. Just ring me when you leave work and Iā€™ll be ready to go when youā€™re back.ā€Ā 
ā€œOk, hermosa, mi amor, my gorgeous cariƱo, happy anniversary, my love,ā€ Frankie captures your chin between his thumb and fingers and you smile up at him as he gives you another long kiss.Ā 
ā€œHappy anniversary, Frankie, my love,ā€ you mumble against his lips, giggling as he tries to push you up against the door, groping at your ass, ā€œI thought you had to leave.ā€Ā 
ā€œI do, fuck, but I donā€™t want to,ā€ Frankie sighs, and plants a final kiss on your mouth before he opens the door and heads out, ā€œIā€™ll see you this afternoon, hermosa,ā€ he smiles, ā€œte amo.ā€Ā 
ā€œLove you too, Frankie.ā€Ā 
You lock up behind him and continue to get ready. The plan is to head out of the city and up to Dennyā€™s cabin as soon as Frankieā€™s back from work. Youā€™re working from home today to save some time, youā€™ve set aside manuscripts to read and thatā€™s best done from home anyway.Ā 
Frankie had surprised you a couple of weeks ago by telling you heā€™d asked Denny if you two could borrow the cabin for your anniversary, have a little holiday together. Today was exactly one year since you met at The Outback Bar and it had been the best year of your life thanks to Frankie. A weekend escape, just the two of you at the cabin, sounded like the perfect way to celebrate. To make matters even better youā€™d closed on a house just a few days ago, all the paperwork signed, you didnā€™t even have the keys yet, but youā€™d still spent the past three days mentally decorating the whole place. Frankie had sent LucĆ­a pictures of the house and her room and sheā€™d been over the moon to see the pictures of the pool outside. Now you were planning on throwing your very first Thanksgiving dinner at your new house together with Frankie and LucĆ­a.Ā 
You allowed yourself to get lost in daydreams for a while as you finished your breakfast and cleared the kitchen, throwing a load of clothes in the washing machine. While it ran its cycle you sat down at your small home office and went over the manuscript.Ā 
Frankie called you just after lunch with bad news.Ā 
ā€œIā€™m sorry, cariƱo, I think Iā€™ll probably be later than I thought, things are fucking crazy today,ā€ he sighed over the phone. ā€œOne of our choppers crashed, we canā€™t get hold of the pilot, Iā€™m just fucking praying heā€™s ok, Dennyā€™s on his way out there now.ā€ You can hear him rub his hand over his face, rough against his scruffy beard, ā€œAnd Iā€™ve got to fly three doctors to different locations, apparently theyā€™re swamped, all kinds of crazy shit happening, itā€™s like itā€™s a full moon night but itā€™s midday.ā€Ā 
ā€œItā€™s fine, Frankie, just fly safe, youā€™ll get here when you get here and if itā€™s too late weā€™ll drive up tomorrow.ā€Ā 
ā€œYeah, but I wanted to be with you all weekend,ā€ he huffs, ā€œFuck, Iā€™ve got to go, Dennyā€™s on the radio. Talk soon, cariƱo.ā€ He hangs up before you have a chance to say goodbye.Ā 
By the time seven pm rolls around you have everything packed up for the trip to the cabin, youā€™ve been checking your phone for Frankieā€™s phone call for the past hour. He hadnā€™t been exaggerating when he said things were crazy today, youā€™d gone down to the corner store for some snacks for the road and found it closed, shutters down even though it was only five pm, the streets empty. And on your way back to the apartment youā€™d seen a police car crash into a small car. Youā€™d started running over to the crash to see if you could help but a police man had stumbled from the cruiser and yelled at you to get back inside, to stay away. Something in his voice had scared you and youā€™d turned back straight away, running back to your building and up the stairs.Ā 
Once back in the apartment youā€™d locked the door and tried calling Frankie, but he didnā€™t pick up. That wasnā€™t unusual, he usually couldnā€™t answer when he was flying, if you really needed to get hold of him youā€™d call Denny and heā€™d patch you through on the radio. But you tried Denny too and there was no reply there either, not on his cell or the landline to the airfield.Ā 
So now itā€™s seven pm and youā€™re getting antsy. There are an extraordinary amount of police sirens outside, the news are talking about riots in the streets downtown, but the footage makes it look more like a warzone and the local news cuts the broadcast when someone attacks the camera man.Ā 
At nine youā€™re pacing the apartment, back and forth between the big window facing the street and the small window in the kitchen overlooking the parking lot. When your phone rings you jump, and relief floods your chest when you see that itā€™s Frankie. ā€œFrankie, where are you? Did you see the news?ā€ you ask when you pick up, but youā€™re interrupted by him straight away.Ā 
ā€œCariƱo, where are you? Still at home?ā€ He sounds stressed and heā€™s breathing hard.Ā 
ā€œYeah, Iā€™m at home, waiting for you, of course. Whatā€™s going on, are you running?ā€ You press your phone to your ear, trying to hear whatā€™s going on around him, you can hear people shouting in the background.Ā 
ā€œI was, Iā€™m trying to get away from Washington Park, Iā€¦I got into some trouble,ā€ he stutters, ā€œsome guy was beating up another guy and I pulled over to stop him, I had to pull him off the other guy but he was fucking crazy, like high on salts or something, never seen anything like it. He came after me and I had toā€¦Iā€™m sorry cariƱo, I had toā€¦take him out.ā€Ā 
You hear the shame in his voice, youā€™ve only talked a couple of times about the guy in the bar Frankie beat up because he thought heā€™d hit you. He knew his skill at violence scared you and heā€™d done his utmost to prove to you that he wasnā€™t a violent person. But now heā€™d had to take this guy out, in self defence, and he was trying to explain it to you.Ā 
ā€œJust get home, Frankie,ā€ you say, ā€œwe can talk when you get here, just get home.ā€Ā 
ā€œIā€™m trying, hermosa, but the police turned up andā€¦fuckā€¦hang on.ā€Ā 
You hear his heavy boots shuffling over broken glass and hard ground, he grunts as he seems to move through or over a structure, nearly dropping the phone.Ā 
ā€œOk, I have to keep moving, hermosa,ā€ he pants, ā€œthe police turned up andā€¦they thought Iā€™d killed the guy, the didnā€™t see him beating up the other guy an-ā€Ā 
ā€œYou killed him!?ā€ your eyes are wide, youā€™ve stopped dead in your tracks in front of the big window.Ā 
ā€œI donā€™t know, cariƱo, the police came, they pulled their guns on me, I had to run and-ā€
ā€œFrankie, why the fuck did you run from the police? Youā€™re gonna get into so much more trouble now!ā€Ā 
ā€œI couldnā€™t stay, something isnā€™t right, some weird shit is happening all over town.ā€Ā 
ā€œAnd fucking running from the police after beating someone to death is the way to make it less weird, Frankie?ā€ you spit out, youā€™ve been worried about him for hours but now your nervous energy shifts into anger at his stupidity. ā€œJust get the fuck home and weā€™ll deal with this mess in the morning, or just maybe just turn yourself in, itā€™s gonna look so bad with you running from the scene.ā€ You sigh, pushing your fingers through your hair, ā€œFrankie, whyā€™d you have to be so reckless?ā€Ā Ā 
Frankie bristles, you can hear his anger, ā€œYou donā€™t understa-ā€ he begins but suddenly your phone goes dead, cutting him off. You look down at the screen and curse, you have no reception, there are no bars, it looks like the service has overloaded or gone down.
ā€œFuck,ā€ you say out loud, and turn it off, maybe a restart will help, but no luck. Your phone is still dead and when you try calling Frankie on your landline phone it goes straight to voicemail. You leave a message, telling him to just come home as soon as possible.Ā 
After that thereā€™s not much to do except wait, you resume your path between the kitchen window and the living room window, stopping every now and then to flick through the news, all hell seems to be breaking out across the state, even the country. You try calling Frankie a few more times but it still goes straight to voicemail. The knot in your stomach is growing, making you feel nauseous with nerves.Ā 
You call Pope but thereā€™s no reply so you call Willā€™s landline. Hannah picks up and sheā€™s frantic with worry about Will, heā€™s not back from work and she canā€™t get hold of him either. Benny was meant to have dinner with them and heā€™s taken the car to try and go pick up Will at work but with the cell phone services down she canā€™t reach him either.Ā Ā 
ā€œI donā€™t know what the fuck is going on,ā€ she almost cries, ā€œI saw people running down the street just now and I donā€™t know if I should leave or what?ā€Ā 
ā€œNo, just stay put, Will or Benny will come back there so just lock up and wait,ā€ you say, you canā€™t stop yourself from biting your nails, you feel panic rising in your throat.
You promise to keep in touch and update each other, when you hang up you feel sick to your stomach. You desperately want Frankie to come back, you need to see him and feel his arms around you, tell you itā€™ll be alright, but no matter how many times you call, you only get his voicemail. You ring a few extra times just to hear his voice repeat the same message.Ā 
ā€œHi, this is Francisco Morales, I canā€™t pick up right now, please leave a message.ā€Ā 
ā€œPlease, please, please, Frankie, come home, come home, baby,ā€ you whisper into the phone as you listen to his voice again.Ā 
Night has fallen outside and itā€™s even worse, around the city fires have broken out and from your apartment you can see a couple of them burn out of control. Just after midnight the news channel stops broadcasting, suddenly, in the middle of an update. You flick through the channels but thereā€™s only static on all of them.Ā 
You call Willā€™s place again but thereā€™s no reply, you hope that means Benny has brought back Will to Hannah, and they canā€™t pick up right now, maybe theyā€™re on their way here.Ā 
Just as youā€™ve put the phone down it rings again and you snatch it up.Ā 
ā€œFrankie?ā€ you almost cry down the receiver but instead you hear Popeā€™s worried voice.Ā 
ā€œIs Frankie there?ā€ he asks, you can hear the stress in his voice.Ā 
ā€œNo, he called at nine, heā€¦he was in some trouble but I donā€™t knowā€¦he was on his way home, but heā€™s not here yet,ā€ your words rush out, ā€œPope, whatā€™sĀ  happening? I canā€™t get hold of Will or Benny either and Iā€™m freaking out!ā€Ā 
ā€œI donā€™t know, itā€™s a shit show, people areā€¦listen, Iā€™m not too far from you, Iā€™ll try and make it over there. Iā€™m on a military frequency so my phoneā€™s still up, Iā€™ll call you if anything. Just stay put inside, keep the door locked.ā€
ā€œYes, yeah, of course, Iā€™m waiting for Frankie, Iā€™m not going anywhere,ā€ you say, double checking the lock and deadbolt on the front door.Ā 
ā€œDo you have a weapon, a gun, baseball bat, knife, anything?ā€ he asks, you can hear him jogging, his shoes drumming along whatever hard surface he is on.Ā 
ā€œI donā€™t know, I donā€™t think we have a gun, we have a baseball bat, and the kitchen knives,ā€ you frown, looking out the window again, ā€œPope, why do I need to arm myself, are people looting?ā€Ā 
ā€œYeah, theyā€™re looting and itā€™s getting violent, so stay inside, and donā€™t open to anyone except me or Frankie. And donā€™t talk to anyone but me or Frankie, ok?ā€Ā 
ā€œOk, Iā€™ll dig out the baseball bat straight away butā€¦but just get here, please, Pope, Iā€™m really scared.ā€ You leave the window and go to the closet in the guest room where Frankie keeps his old bat.Ā 
ā€œI know, I know, Iā€™ll get there as soon as I can.ā€Ā 
ā€œHurry, please, and stay safe, Santi,ā€ you say, you can feel tears gathering on your lashes as your voice starts to wobble.Ā 
ā€œI need you to be strong, ok,ā€ Popeā€™s voice is firm, as if heā€™s giving a soldier orders, ā€œI need you to handle yourself, if someone tries to come through that door, you need to defend yourself, do you understand? Even kill them if it comes to that, do not let anyone attack you.ā€
ā€œSantiā€¦ā€ you stumble, ā€œI canā€™t..ā€
ā€œI know, but you have to. This is serious, Frankieā€™s not around so I need to make sure youā€™re safe, and for you to be safe, you need to be ruthless now, do you understand?ā€ His voice has a sharp edge, heā€™s breathing hard, moving fast trying to get to you, and the reality of what heā€™s saying hits you.Ā 
ā€œI promise, Pope,ā€ you whisper, ā€œIā€™llā€¦Iā€™ll try my best to defend myself, Iā€™ll try.ā€Ā 
ā€œGood, Iā€™m about an hour away on foot, but itā€™s slow going. Give me two to three hours and I should be there.ā€Ā 
ā€œStay safe, Santi, please,ā€ you beg, pressing the receiver of the phone to your ear, as if hearing the voice of your friend will keep him and you safe.Ā 
ā€œIā€™ll try my best, and stay strong for me, and for Frankie, ok?ā€Ā 
ā€œI will,ā€ you promise.Ā 
ā€¦Ā 
When his phone dies, Frankie hears the click and then nothing. He had a feeling this would happen, itā€™s mayhem in the city and the system is bound to be overloaded, so the lack of reception is no surprise, but he still curses under his breath.Ā 
He was moving down narrow back alleys, jogging fast, staying off the main streets, avoiding people, especially any police, as he tried to get away from Washington Park. When heā€™d put some distance between himself and the park, heā€™d stopped to call home. Heā€™d crouched down just behind a dumpster, keeping out of sight, while he talked to her. Now he stands up carefully, looking up and down the alley and considers his next move. The keys to his truck are in his pocket, itā€™s still where he left it by the park, he could maybe try to get back to it but the police are sure to be there.Ā 
But something, at the back of his head, tells him he needs to keep moving and get home as fast as possible. Things are not normal, the whole day has been a shit show, but now, now itā€™s getting out of control. The man heā€™d tried stopping beating up the other guy had been raging, heā€™d turned and attacked Frankie so fast heā€™d barely had time to react. Only his instincts from the army, slower now but still just under the surface, had saved him from getting bit, fucking bit!Ā 
The guy had actually tried biting him when Frankie sidestepped, and tripped him up, making him fall to the ground. Heā€™d been on his feet in a flash and Frankie knew the guy was high on something when he saw his eyes, so heā€™d sidestepped again and swung an elbow to the guyā€™s head, hitting him in the temple. It had been harder than heā€™d intended but the sudden attack had his adrenaline running high, and the man had dropped to the ground and remained motionless.Ā 
As he started running, when the police pulled up, his only thought was to get away as fast as possible. But as he ran, as he put a couple of blocks between him and the park, he saw others starting to act strange. When a city bus crashed into a taxi he dodged into an alley, the passengers on the bus flailing about inside as if they were locked in battle with each other. Frankieā€™s gut was yelling at him that something was very wrong, this was not just a weird day, this was something else, but he couldnā€™t wrap his head around what was going on. So heā€™d stopped to call her, to hear her voice and make sure she was safe, and let her know he was trying to get home.Ā 
The way the call ended, when the phone network died, left a knot in his stomach that had nothing to do with the unfolding mayhem in the city. This weekend was meant to be about them, he wanted everything to be perfect, and now the last words between them had been anger. The small box in his jacket pocket represented everything he wanted for their future, and more than anything he needed to get back to her, to explain what had happened and get them out of the city for their anniversary. Whatever the fuck was going with everyone else, he needed to be with her, at the cabin, and ask her to be his wife. Everything else was secondary.Ā 
Frankie drew a deep breath and started moving back towards Washington Park. He needs his truck, itā€™s their best chance at getting out of the city. Hopefully the police had been called away on something else, letting paramedics deal with the guy heā€™d taken down, maybe he hadnā€™t actually killed him.Ā 
He stays on side streets and alleys, keeping low, staying out of sight. When he sees the door to a gun shop wide open, he pauses, considering the risk. A gun would make him feel safer, but looting one now, is pretty shitty behaviour. The thought stays with him for only a second, before he cautiously moves into the shop. The back of the shop is dark but quiet, broken glass crunches under his boots as he moves towards one of the display cases. Thereā€™s rifles on the wall but theyā€™re too hard to hide, instead he quickly finds a Glock among the wreckage, the familiar gun feels solid in his hand.Ā 
Thereā€™s ammo behind the counter but when he steps around it, he sees the woman, splayed on the floor, face down. He stops in his tracks, staring down at her still form for a beat. Sheā€™s wearing a pink t-shirt and he can see the blood where itā€™s been ripped open over her shoulder. It doesnā€™t look like a significant amount of blood but he canā€™t see her face, canā€™t tell if sheā€™s alive or not.Ā 
Thereā€™s a box of ammo near him and he quickly loads the gun, sliding a full magazine into the Glock. He doesnā€™t know why, maybe the way the day has been, but he keeps his gun trained on the woman, safety off, while he carefully moves towards her. Thereā€™s more ammo behind her and he wants to pick it up, but he also doesnā€™t want to leave her injured or dead without checking on her.Ā 
Gently he nudges the toe of his boot against her hand, shifting it slightly, and he hears a deep growl, inhuman. The sound makes him take a quick step back, more glass breaking under his feet with a loud crackle. The woman lifts her head and turns to look at him for a beat. All Frankie has time to think is that her eyes have the same rage as the man at the park, she scrambles to her feet and launches herself at him. He fires his gun on instinct, the bullet hitting her cheek, the close range making it explode out the back of her head.Ā 
She drops instantly as Frankie holds the gun trained at her. It takes a split second for his training to kick in, but then he moves. Stepping over her, he grabs two more boxes of ammo, stuffing them in his pockets, before he quickly throws himself over the counter and heads out the back door he came through, checking the street before he leaves. Walking fast, but not running, he puts the safety back on the gun and shoves into the back of his trousers, out of sight under his jacket. His breathing is normal but he can feel adrenaline pumping through his system, muscle memory makes him move through the city as if itā€™s hostile enemy territory.Ā 
What the fuck is going on? What was that? Bad batch of some drug on the streets?Ā 
As he moves back towards the truck he checks his phone, thereā€™s still no reception. There are more people on the streets now, more cars too, all heading for the freeway. He sees a family hastily throw bags into a car, a cat in a travel cage stuffed into the back. Other cars speed past, full of stuff, people are packing up and leaving. The sight makes him anxious, he needs to do the same, get back home, get to her, and get the fuck out.Ā 
Screw the weekend, we need to get the fuck out of the city fast, whatever this is, itā€™s not gonna be over by Monday.
He finally spots his truck, parked where he left it, the man heā€™d knocked out nowhere in sight, and no police. Quickly scanning the area for signs of trouble, Frankie crosses the street and gets into the truck. He breathes a sigh of relief when he can lock the door and the engine rumbles to life. He can see traffic lining up on the other side of the park so he takes a side street, mapping the best route back home in his head as he tries to drive as fast as he can, people are running along the streets, cars speeding past and it gets worse the closer to downtown he gets. He tries to skirt around it but as he turns down a side street he finds it blocked by a truck thatā€™s crashed into a building.Ā 
ā€œFuck,ā€ he breathes under his breath, thereā€™s fire under the truck and he can see people on the other side. Quickly he reverses back onto the main street and turns left, heading a few more blocks down. The trafficā€™s getting heavy and itā€™s getting harder to avoid getting stuck, up ahead he sees cars grinding to a halt and in a last second decision he pulls a hard right and turns down a narrow alley, he knows it connects to another big road after a couple of blocks but it will get him closer to home at least, almost all the way there if itā€™s clear. He barrels through the alley, slowing down only to take the sharp turn onto the main road, and speeding up as he sees the way ahead of him clear. The harsh headlights flooding the cabin of his truck is the only warning he has when the bus slams into the passenger side of the truck. The screech of metal and tyres is the last thing Frankie hears as the world outside the shattered windscreen goes spinning and turns to black.Ā 
ā€¦
Your body is telling you to sleep but you canā€™t, itā€™s almost three am and youā€™re on the couch, with a painful knot in your stomach. Thereā€™s sirens wailing outside, close by, and youā€™ve heard screams of terror and pain throughout the night. Frankieā€™s baseball bat is next to you on the couch, your hand shoots out to grab it whenever you hear a sound, your nerves on edge, the big kitchen knife on the coffee table. Youā€™ve cried yourself dry with worry, Frankieā€™s not home, Pope hasnā€™t arrived either, you feel like youā€™re all alone in the world and every minute youā€™re fighting to keep the panic down. Popeā€™s words, keep strong for me and for Frankie, roll through your brain, itā€™s all youā€™ve got to keep you from falling over the edge.Ā 
A loud crack rings out somewhere in your building and you shoot up to your feet, it sounded close and it sounded like a gunshot. Straining your ears you try to hear more, but the wailing sirens from outside make it hard to make out anything. Slowly moving closer to the front door, you grip the bat in your hand. You stop in the hall, holding your breath and listen intently in the silence. Suddenly you hear a shoe scuffle against the floor outside your door and you bite down hard on your lip, your heart is thumping so loudly itā€™s deafening.Ā 
A soft tap on the door startles you enough to make you jump back into Frankieā€™s sneakers on the shoe rack.Ā 
ā€œItā€™s me, Pope, open the door,ā€ Santiā€™s familiar voice filters low through the front door and you almost cry with relief, stumbling forward to unlock it. He comes through it as soon as itā€™s open enough to let him in and he immediately closes it behind him, locking and sliding the deadbolt in place. When he turns to you, you throw your arms around him, and you feel him grab hold of you, squeezing you tight as he pulls you into the living room.Ā 
ā€œSanti, Iā€™m so scared,ā€ you sob, fighting back tears, as he sets you down on the couch, ā€œwhatā€™s happening?ā€Ā 
ā€œI donā€™t know yet, Frankie isnā€™t back?ā€ he asks, looking around the living room.Ā 
ā€œN-No, I havenā€™t heard from him since the cell network went down,ā€ tears well up in your eyes, ā€œh-he said, he was coming back here. But that was six hours ago, Santi!ā€ The tears spill over as fear overcomes you and he sits down next to you on the couch, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, gently shushing you.Ā 
ā€œDeep breaths, hermana, you need to focus,ā€ he turns you around, putting both hands on your shoulders, squeezing them as his eyes lock onto yours. ā€œListen, I need you to stay with me now, ok?ā€Ā 
You nod weakly as Pope wipes your cheek with the back of his hand, ā€œWe need to pack essentials and get out of here, thereā€™s a couple of dirt bikes in the garage under your building, Iā€™ve got the keys and-ā€Ā 
ā€œIā€™m not leaving without Frankie,ā€ you say immediately, leaning back from Pope instinctively. ā€œI have to stay here until he comes back.ā€Ā 
ā€œYou canā€™t, itā€™s not safe, I have to keep you safe while Frankieā€™s not around,ā€ Pope grabs your shoulders again, as if to press it into you but you baulk.Ā 
ā€œIf I leave, with the phones down, he wonā€™t find me. He said he was coming back here and I said Iā€™d stay until he came back,ā€ you pull away from Pope and stand up, moving to the window to look down on the street again.Ā 
ā€œHermana, you havenā€™t seen the city, itā€™s chaos,ā€ heā€™s stands up and comes after you, grabbing hold of your arm, ā€œI donā€™t know whatā€™s going on but people are unhinged, losing control and attacking each other,ā€ his grip on your arm loosens a little but heā€™s turning you to look at him, ā€œI donā€™t want to scare you more, but itā€™s bad out there, people are dying.ā€ He falters, hesitating for a few seconds, ā€œIā€™m sorry, this isnā€™t going away anytime soon, and Frankie might not make it back.ā€Ā 
ā€œDonā€™t say that. Donā€™t fucking say that!ā€ You feel panic rising in your chest and you push him away.
ā€œI saw a womanā€¦she wasā€¦she killed a child, itā€™s that bad out there,ā€ Santi grabs you again, a pained look on his face, pleading, ā€œIā€™m sorry, Frankie is a very capable soldier, one of the best, but it took all I had to make it here.ā€Ā 
You pull your arm from his hand, ā€œHeā€™s coming back here, Iā€™m not leaving without him,ā€ you spit out and step back into the living room, crossing your arms as you turn back to Pope, heā€™s looking at you from the window.Ā 
ā€œI canā€™t leave you here, Frankieā€™s my best friend, my brother, and youā€™re the love of his life, Iā€™ve got to keep you safe. For him, hermana.ā€ Heā€™s pleading with you but you shake your head even as tears well up in your eyes again.Ā 
ā€œIf you want to help Frankie, get to LucĆ­a. Take one of the dirt bikes, get her and weā€™ll meet you at Dennyā€™s cabin.ā€ Youā€™re staring at him, your jaw set, you know Pope canā€™t argue with that and he has no choice. As he drops his chin to his chest you know youā€™ve got your way.Ā 
ā€œOk,ā€ he sighs, ā€œIā€™ll go and get LucĆ­a, but you have to promise me that if Frankieā€™s not back by Sunday morning, you take the other bike and come up to the cabin too,ā€ heā€™s walked over to you again, looking down at you with dark eyes, ā€œif heā€™s not back by Sunday morning, heā€™s not coming back. Take the bike, get to the cabin.ā€Ā 
ā€œHeā€™s coming back, Santi.ā€Ā 
ā€œI really want you to be right, hermana,ā€ he sighs as he wraps his arms around you and pulls you to his chest. You slump against him, you can feel your body shaking with the onslaught of nerves and adrenaline.Ā 
ā€œHe has to come back,ā€ you whisper into his chest, ā€œhe has to, he has to, he has to,ā€ you repeat as a mantra as Pope gently strokes your back.Ā 
You donā€™t notice when Pope carefully lays you down in your bed, pulling the blanket over you. Your exhausted body and mind shuts down for a few hours and lets you sleep without dreams. When you wake with a start, daylight is starting to creep through your window, and for a second it feels like a normal morning, until you see Frankieā€™s side of the bed, empty.Ā 
You push back the blanket and make your way out to the living room to find Santi on the couch, two guns and a rifle laid out in front of him.Ā 
ā€œMorning,ā€ he says, looking up at you. ā€œI hope you managed to sleep some.ā€Ā 
You sit down next to him on the couch, watching his methodical movements with the weapons, ā€œDid you sleep at all?ā€Ā 
ā€œNo, I kept watch, but itā€™s fine,ā€ he adds as he sees your concerned look, ā€œIā€™m still running on adrenaline and Iā€™m used to it. Pulled plenty of all nighters in the army.ā€Ā 
ā€œDid anything happen while I slept?ā€ You move to the kitchen and open the fridge to pull out some breakfast, the inside of the fridge is dark.Ā 
ā€œThe electricity and the military phone network cut out about an hour ago,ā€ Pope nods at the fridge. ā€œEat whatever might go bad first.ā€ He stands up and grabs a backpack, you recognise it as Frankieā€™s spare one. ā€œIā€™ve packed enough to keep me going for a few days, and Iā€™ve done the same for you and Frankie,ā€ he points to a bigger backpack, Frankieā€™s hiking pack. ā€œIā€™m gonna try to get to LucĆ­a now, you and Frankie head to the cabin as soon as possible. Get out of the city, thatā€™ll be Frankieā€™s plan too.ā€
He comes over to you where youā€™re standing by the kitchen counter, frozen in your movements. ā€œRemember what I said last night, hermana, Iā€™m sorry, but if heā€™s not back by Sunday morningā€¦ā€ he pauses and grabs hold of your hand, squeezing it tight, ā€œif heā€™s not back, you have to leave by yourself and get to the cabin. Promise me,ā€ his dark eyes are bearing into you as his fingers wrap around your own.Ā 
ā€œI promise, Iā€™ll leave if heā€™s not back by Sunday morning,ā€ you say, your voice barely over a whisper.Ā 
ā€œOk,ā€ he gives your hand another squeeze and goes back to Frankieā€™s backpack. ā€œIā€™m leaving a gun with you, and some ammo, itā€™s in the pack,ā€ he shows you the boxes in an outside pocket. ā€œThis is your gun,ā€ he picks up one of the handguns on the coffee table, ā€œitā€™s easy enough to handle, Iā€™ll show you.ā€
ā€œWhere did you get them?ā€ you ask, ā€œdid you just happen to have two guns and a rifle on you yesterday?ā€Ā 
ā€œNo, I didnā€™t,ā€ Santi looks at you, ā€œI broke into a gunshop and took them.ā€ He sees the way your eyes widen and holds up his hand, ā€œLook out of the window, the world is falling apart, I donā€™t know what is happening, but looting three guns to protect myself and you, is the least of our worries right now.ā€ He picks up the gun and motions you over and shows you how to hold it, ā€œGrab it like this, both hands, keep it steady.ā€Ā 
The gun is heavy and cold in your hands, ā€œYou really think the world is falling apart?ā€ Your voice is quiet as you adjust your grip as Pope moves your fingers.Ā 
ā€œThe first thing I heard yesterday was that something was going on in Indonesia, then Rotterdam. Here, put your thumb like this.ā€ He moves your thumb to cross over your hand, ā€œthen there were news reports from all over the US. And if things are as bad there as they are here, then yeah, I think the world is falling apart.ā€Ā 
He steps back and looks at your grip on the gun, ā€œThatā€™s it, hold it like that and squeeze the trigger when youā€™re ready.ā€Ā 
You pull back on the trigger and the gun clicks. ā€œSo we get to the cabin and then what?ā€ you ask, looking down the barrel of the gun, feeling the weight.Ā 
ā€œWe hold down the fort, wait it out, until itā€™s under control again.ā€ Pope gently takes the gun from your hands and shows you how to load it, making you go through the motions several times. When he decides youā€™ve got a hang of it, he takes the gun and gives it to you, ā€œSafety on, keep it within easy reach. I shouldā€™ve gotten you a holster but stick it in the back of your pants for now, keep it on you at all times, ok?ā€Ā 
ā€œOk,ā€ you nod, doing as he says before looking up at him. ā€œDo you think the others, Will and Benny, will come up to the cabin too?ā€
ā€œIf they can, yeah, itā€™s the most logical choice.ā€Ā 
He turns and grabs the smaller backpack and his jacket, ā€œIā€™m leaving, Iā€™ll get to LucĆ­a, get her and her mom, if I can, back to the cabin. Sunday morning, ok?ā€Ā 
ā€œSunday morning I leave if heā€™s not back, yes, Santi.ā€ You nod, your jaw tight.Ā 
ā€œOk. And listen, when you do leave, with or without Frankie, donā€™t trust anyone. People are attacking without warning, like animals.ā€ Popeā€™s eyes are on you, imploring you to understand, ā€œAnyone moves towards you, shoot them, aim for the torso to bring them down, then head shot, to kill. I know itā€™s not going to be easy, but if you want to survive, you have to. Get to the cabin, Iā€™ll be there.ā€ He pulls you in for a big hug, squeezing you tight and you hold on to him for as long as you can before he pulls away.Ā 
ā€œStay safe, Santi.ā€Ā 
ā€œYou too, hermana.ā€Ā Ā 
You walk him to the front door and watch him as he listens through it for a couple a minute, the landing outside is silent. Carefully he opens the door, gun drawn, and peeks outside. Daylight is filtering through the windows, shining some light into the stairwell. With a final look at you he steps through the door and you close it behind him, locking it securely again.Ā 
Walking back to the living room, you sit down on the couch. Twenty four hours until Sunday morning.
All you can do now is wait.
Chapter 12
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11queensupreme11 Ā· 4 months ago
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First of all: Long Live the Queen! Hope you're doing great, your stories are a real delicacy... I first discovered your Tsunami fic when I was in my jjk era, but your Arsenic Blues woke up my inner pjo fan. So eager to see how this all unfold.
But for now, time for the Rankings!
My personnal RoR favorites based on the manga only:
1) Shiva--> Not in the harem, but I had to place him somehow. Was searching for a Shiva fic in the first place. Love the himbo energy. At least it's good to see he's one of the "sane" one in your story.
2) Anubis--> Same, feral himbo doggo energy, can we ask for more?
3) Beelzebub--> Noo don't unalive yourself Bb love u so pretty hahašŸ„ŗ
4) HadĆØs--> All Hail to the King, here for the BigBro energy
5) Poseidon--> Mytho/Pjo fan here, of course he's one of my favorite gods, but I'm not a fan of his RoR portrayal. He's pretty tho.
6) Apollon--> Too effeminate for my taste, I was rooting for Leonidas anyway.
7) Loki--> U ugly ass, stinky ass, nasty ass bi***
Now, the interesting part, the Ranking based on [Arsenic Blues], as for now, until chapter 31:
1) Beelie Bestie šŸ¤—! It seems you will soon give us reasons to hate him, but for now he's my personal favorite. Hope he will overcome his current difficulties. Fun fact: I tried to translate "Beelie" in my language, tried to find an equivalent nickname, I found "BĆ©bou" (pronounced beeboo, another way to say "baby"). Thatā€™s so cute!
2) Loki--> I know it's unlikely but... is this bad that I really want him to take Percy's virginity šŸ˜³? Your writing is soooo good, it made me root for him of all people. Everyone loves a good outsider, and since he doesn't want to kill Percy anymore, he climbs up the ranking.
3) Anubis--> Favorite from the manga, I was sooo happy to see that u included the doggo. Didn't appear yet, but I have really high hopes for him. Beware the Allmighty Knot!
4) Poseidon--> This is a dark fic, I understand the appeal, the taboo of the incestual relationship, but since he's already her father, her family, the one who has authority over her, I think he has an unfair advantage compared to the others. This is the reason he's kinda low ranked, but I really loved the relationship he built with our best girl. Embrace Fatherhood (but not too muchšŸ˜°)
5) HadĆØs--> Same here, too much authority over her, doesn't have the appeal of the gradually evolving relationship. Creepy oldĀ  uncle, hope your non-existent liver bursts. For now, he's the one who had the most "action" with Percy, so it seems unlikely that he will have her virginity as well.
6) Apollon--> Well, at least he's funny šŸ˜…. I'm sorry, but based on his pathetic simpy behavior, I have to give him the stamp of the "Whiny Little Bitch" of this story. Don't worry tho, there always have to be one in a fic, and he's not as bad as his Tsunami counterpart (Yuuta you nasty motherfucker I had faith in you-).
7) The Seventh--> Seeing the results of the poll, it seems I'm one of the only weirdos who voted for Ahura Mazda. Raa would be awesome too, but I have to say I was disturbed when I first saw that angry buff dude in the spin-off. For me, Raa was still that muscle mommy from the webtoon/manhwa Ennead (read Ennead. Ennead is good for your health). I just want the 7th to not be Cu Chulainn. I know I would still love it if you include him (cause ur writing is golden) but that's just a preference of mine.
I hope I'm understood. That's a big ass message, my thoughts are all over the place and my home country is known for having a shit level in english.
If you're interested I could do the same kind of ranking for Tsunami/Bloodflood. Have a great day, Peace!
A SHIVA LOVER OMG HIIIII
the anime did him sooooo good, he's so hot there, i'm glad they didn't fuck him up like LOOK AT HIM
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the bonus chapter for chapter 91 is about shiva AND IM SO PISSED IT HASN'T BEEN TRANSLATED YET, I WANNA READ IT SO BAD I DON'T EVEN CARE IF ITS SUPER SHORT šŸ˜­šŸ˜­
also, YES PLEASE you're free to give me your own bloodflood/tsunami rankings too!!!
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sserpente Ā· 1 year ago
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LOKI EPISODES 4 and 5, HOLY SHIT!
Let me tell you, this past week was insane! I did manage to watch Episode 4 last week but pretty much fell asleep straight after so I completely missed writing about Episode 4!
So let's talk about that one first before I lose my absolute shit at Episode 5!
As always, HEAVY SPOILERS BELOW THE CUT!
So then... it is finally revealed that Ravonna had something to do with Kang before. I can't say I'm too surprised. And of course she would just kill a bunch of people to get her way.
Quite interesting how she pretended Loki was the villain this whole time when it's actually her. And don't even get me started on Brad!
I have a feeling we're gonna have a big confrontation in the final episode... but I'm getting ahead of myself--I am way too hyped now after Episode 5.
Now, I have to say, Episode 4 didn't have an awful lot of Loki in it, haha! But hells, did Episode 5 make up for that... DAMN!
The cliffhanger was something else. Obviously, the suspense wasn't one of "oh no, they're doomed and everyone's dead now" but rather "oh shit, how are they going to fix THAT?!"
Good thing it wasn't Loki who went out there... so much for spaghettification. So with that... let's move on to Episode 5 so I can lose my absolute shit!
The very moment O.B. mentioned that Loki might be able to control time slipping I was like šŸ‘€. I had a feeling where this was going but... patience, patience, patience.
I swear my poor heartbroken God of Mischief... the fact the timelines were all just evaporating was honestly scary. I mean, imagine your reality is falling apart and there is NOTHING left. NOTHING. And there's nowhere for you to go.
I thought it was convenient that Loki would show up in his friends' timelines until I realised there was a reason for that. Speaking of which... B15 was a doctor, aw! And Mobius finally has his Jetskis! And two sons?! GODS! I hope that they'll be able to combine their TVA life and their timeline life. There's gotta be a way, right?
But to be fair... Casey didn't wanna go back to prison (did you hear him say "they're gonna gut us like fish" I was cackling), Mobius loves jetskis but doesn't seem to be 100% fulfilled with this job... O.B. is a writer who's trying to make it (I felt that) and I guess... you could say B15 has great purpose as a doctor but still! So... I'm still with Loki, they did have a purpose at the TVA and it should be their choice.
I totally love the conversation between Loki and Sylvie here and the fact that she admitted that she's selfish. Is Loki selfish too? Yes and no. Yes, he wants his friends back. But why? Because he CARES about them. And because he knows that most of them aren't actually as happy as they should be in their timelines. Also, naturally, if he doesn't fix this, then all of reality will evaporate so his argument is quite valid.
I swear when he said "where do I belong then"... I was SO DAMN CLOSE TO TEARS. I just wanted to HUG him so bad! Because it's true, isn't it? Loki has no timeline to go back to. He can't just show up in Asgard and pretend like nothing ever happened. But a life like the one Sylvie thinks she's happy with, working at McDonald's? That's not it for Loki, we all know that! I swear... by the end of Season 2 it will be official that he found his glorious purpose!
I mean... just the fact that he was willing to give it all up alone... to let Mobius and everyone else go back to their timelines... NO ONE DARE SAY HE IS A VILLAIN EVER AGAIN, OUR PRECIOUS BABY!
I know I said we don't need Loki to be a self-righteous hero and we don't but the character development in this episode, the reflection of what's been going on with him... SO DAMN GOOD! It's proof that Loki has a good heart, honestly! I mean... we knew that already, it's not the first time we saw it on display but still... awww!
So what's next? Loki, the lord of time... I mean, I'm sorry... did he just become the most powerful being in the MCU?! JUSTICE FOR LOKI AT LAST! I WAS SCREAMING LET ME TELL YOU!
I was hoping for something like that so bad and now here we are! With how things are working out right now, I have a feeling it won't be long until Loki is back in the main MCU timeline and the ultimate force in the final battle against Kang!
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your-local-baguette Ā· 1 year ago
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Can i have headcanons on loki and reader dealing with with the pxg team?
(friends to lovers too pls šŸ™‡šŸ¾ā€ā™€ļø
possibly fem reader but gn is fine too)
Poor baby can't be dealing with those monsters(shidou and Rin only tbh) alonešŸ˜­
Take care of yourself and MWAH!!
I LOVE YOU FOR THAT REQUEST. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF TOO! Sending you some kisses back.
Not me writing this while listening to gorgeous by taylor swift our queen.
Warnings: none. Just not proofread
- the main trouble is rin, shidou and karasu.
- it was so much trouble ego had to make you go live in the pxg part.
- you never regretted accepting a contract more than this
- je jure je n'ai jamais autant regretter devenir une assistante pour Ć©quipes de sport. ( I swear i never regretted becoming a manager for sport teams )
- loki chuckled hearing what you said.
- you watched rin and shidou fight again.
- came up in between the two dumbasses and grabbed both of them by the back of their collar. Dragging them off the field." Next i catch you fighting like this I'm going to give you both a beating personally"
- you curse them out in french
- loki rly enjoys hearing you speak french and you talking shit about them
- you'll alway sit away from the team and he'll just willingly sit with you.
- you both became good friends
- at first karasu, shidou and rin was just a joke between you too. But it became the only subject you talk about.
- you often kicked his ankles gently under the table and then smirking. You both would burst out laughing after
- except loki caught feelings much before you did. He finally found someone who loved him for him. But he would go back to france after this project so he just buried these feelings.
- he told himself to enjoy every single second he spent with you
- you would usually watch him and the team pratice. Then dragging out the idiots ( rin and shidou ) cuz they started fighting again.
- they were genuinely scared of you after the first beating session.
- he once saw you jungling with a soccer ball.
- he didn't hesitate to join you and you both started passing eachother the ball in the air.
- you would often discuss about things like how you played for six Summer straight with a team in football. But ended becoming a manager.
- you both would usually stay in eachother room late at night
- you'd fall asleep on him Mid conversation.
- he would gently smile laying you on his bed
- the next morning you would wake to a note
- you fell asleep, breakfast already passed and im practicing with the team. Be sure to get ample rest. I know you've been skipping some sleep hours.
- he was a sweetheart with you
- he would walk back in while you're tying your hair up ( if you're bald or have short hair im sorry-) you'd have a tie in your mouth and he'd just stand there staring you up and down.
- more time passed, more it became awkward between you two.
- it did all come to an end when one evening he inhaled deeply. Grabbing both your hands. Stopping you in your tracks.
- you looked at him straight in the eyes.
- y/n! I love you!
- he admitted. Clenching his eyes shut.
- but his whole body relaxed when he felt your hand cup hia cheek, a sweet and bright smile attached to your face.
- i love you too, loki
- your thumb brushed over his lips gently before you leaned in and pressed your forehead against his
- a hand going on the back of his neck.
- you gently pushed his face, connecting your lips in a sweet and gentle kiss.
- he leaned back, as you cupped both aide of his face and nit leaving his lips for a second.
- oh how long had you waited for this.
- when you parted, you lost yourself in his eyes. Resting your head on his chest, inhaling deeply. Wrapping your arms around his larger figure
- after a while he did the same. Kissing the top of your head.
Hope you enjoyed! The end was like a drabble but separated in sections! I still hope you liked it, tysm for this request, i rly enjoyed writing this.
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sofiadragon Ā· 1 year ago
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Hi! Thinking back to your poll on concrit, I want to share my approach. When I am confused by a story, I might say "when X happened, I expected Y only for Z to happen." Or, "I'm not sure why X happened. Maybe A or B?" I never want to say that the writing is wrong, or make judgements about how to improve it. So far, people haven't even interpreted what I'm doing as criticism, even though imo it's the most valuable kind of feedback an author can get!
I'll be honest: I got a little frustrated about the most popular reblog basically saying "sit down internet rando, shut up, and say something nice or nothing at all. No questions, no additional commentary." What they seem to want is just another kudos button that works per-chapter. What they were describing as constructive criticism was full analysis beta reading, which, yes, gives good concrit in a supportive safe space. However, not all concrit is the sort of deep dive into plot, themeing, and characterization that should only be given in a dialog with someone who knows the writer's goals. I've gotten unsolicited public analysis of Hiraeth and that was just awful to experience. We do not suggest plot lines or additional scenes in the comments of a story - especially a completed story as was the case for my Doctor/Donna fic.
However, what you are describing is also constructive criticism. So is "I lost track of who was saying what around X line, was it A saying This Thing and B saying That Thing to C?" So is "I'm a nurse and I think you used the word catheter when you meant canula." I think there should always be an equal amount of attention given to what worked really well when you point out what doesn't, but for more superficial things writers should expect a few comments that aren't just "good job" or a star emoji. We shouldn't be telling our audience that we don't want feedback at all. Some of the best comments I've gotten contained questions about the story that would count as "unwelcome criticism" by the standard of that hard-line post.
Look, I don't want to sound like a crabby old woman griping about this new generation, but you are going to feel slightly inconvenienced or mildly irritated from time to time and that is no great crime against you. Curate your online experience with a sledgehammer to protect yourself from things that would cause you great emotional harm, fuck terfs and all that, but if something is just a mild irritant put the sledgehammer down and shoo it away with appropriate prejudice. So no, sorry if that makes me an asshole, but I think "don't be rude" is the better advice than "only say positive things."
As someone who writes unreliable narrator stories staring sneaky little shits like Loki, Tony Stark, Merlin, and so on I know people are going to speculate a bit in the comments. Heck, ffn calls them 'reviews' so when I post over there people are sometimes going to rate me out of 10 and write up an actual review. I'm going to get questions, and I'm going to give cryptic answer. A lot of time that's fun, but sometimes people get pushy or rude about it and I have to:
Deal with feeling slightly icky.
Ignore the comment or handle it with grace.
What I don't do is reply "no criticism accepted" and go at them like they ripped my baby apart or act like they had no right to irritate me. Take the nurse example. The specific comment I am thinking of came across a bit rude, it was just that I used one word and needed to have used another phrased like they were my elementary school teacher, but it was a 2/10 on the scale of rude things someone has said to me. I replied that sometimes I use the wrong technical word on purpose because the character doesn't know better, and then moved along because they were clearly trying to be helpful and just failed to communicate tone. We're writers, we're good at communicating via text. Not everyone is.
Opt-in is an approach that requires the audience know about it, but it is the right answer. It's people management. Signal to readers you know where you want the story to go, or if you are open to chatting in the comments. Set expectations and people will comment more and give feedback (mostly) on whatever you opted into. Otherwise turn the comments off, if you really just made it for yourself and don't want anyone to talk to you about it and you can't even handle a spelling correction.
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michelleleewise Ā· 2 years ago
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Could you write something that involves a reader finding out their pregnant unexpectedly and thinks Loki won't take it well, while Loki figures it out on his own (or someone tells him or something) and they both don't bring it up until the secret slips out on its own?
I dunno, its sounds like a sitcom episode, but maybe you can make it into something cute.
Sorry this took me an eternity!!!!! I got super busy, but here I am!!!!!! Thanks so so much for sending this to me!! I hope you like it!!! šŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’š
====================================
Expecting
Pairing: Loki x reader
Warnings: mentions of morning of morning sickness, mentions of pregnancy test, swearing, anxiety, stress, jumping to conclusions,some angst, fluff.
Sunmary: you've felt ill for the last week, not sure what the cause is, you decide to rule out the one thing your sure it can't be......
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"Shit" You said to yourself, looking down at two lines mocking you. You stood up, pacing in the bathroom "shit, shit, shit." You said as you ran a hand through your hair. You put the test back in the box, heading back to your desk. You sat down, sliding the box discreetly in a drawer as you sighed, laying you head on your desk. "Shiiiiiit." You sighed "well your a barrel of sunshine aren't you?" You heard, your head shooting up seeing Bucky "Oh, hey what are you doing here?" You asked looking at him. "Tony wanted me to drop these off, you ok?" He asked handing you some files.
"Yes! Yes I'm fine, why wouldn't I be? What makes you think somethings wrong?" You rushed out as he stared at you. "I think you need to cut out the caffeine doll." He said sitting down. "Everything ok with Loki?" He asked watching you "why wouldn't we be?" You rushed "why do you keep answering my questions with questions?" He asked raising an eyebrow as you sighed. "Loki and I are good, great actually." You sighed looking down. "Then..." he waved his hand. "I....im...." you stared as he watched you, realization hitting him "really!?" He asked leaning forward.
"Shhhh. Keep it down." You said looking around. "What did he say?" He asked smiling "he doesn't know" You said looking at him "why haven't you told him?" He asked "because, we've only been together a year, we don't even live together! We've never even talked about kids. W...what if he doesn't want them, what if he...leaves me?" You said fidgeting with your hands "please, He loves you to death, he won't leave you. Just talk to him, it'll be ok." He said as he stood up.
Your thoughts ran rampant the rest of the day. How was he going to react? Was he going to hate you? "Are you ready darling?" You heard Loki, throwing your pencil across the room. "You ok love? You seem jumpy." He said picking up your pencil. "I..I'm fine, everything's fine. Let's go." You said jumping up walking to the door. "Shit. I forgot my keys in my desk." You sighed turning around. "You go ahead. I'll grab them." He said kissing your forehead. You nodded heading out the door as Loki went to your desk, grabbing your keys as the box caught his eye.
He looked up seeing no one was watching as he opened the box, seeing the test. He scanned the box, looking back at the test as his eyes widened "no, it can't be." He whispered, looking over the box again. He hurried and put it back as he closed the drawer, making his way to the door. "A baby, we're gonna have a baby." He whispered to himself smiling as he opened the door following you.
You sat down at the restaurant, sipping your water "loki, how do you feel about kids?" You asked looking at him. "Well, I'd never really thought about it, but I would love to have a family, why?" He asked watching you "just curious." You said looking down. "How do you feel about it." He asked "Well, I'm not against it, but I mean....I......I don't know I guess eventually I would." You said nervously, you felt like your brain was disconnected from your mouth, nothing was making sense. "You know, I'm kinda tired, I think im just gonna head home." You said getting up. "Would you like me to come with you?" He asked "No, no I'm fine." You urged as you grabbed your purse "I'll call you tomorrow." You said running out of the restaurant.
You made it home, seeing Loki had tried calling several times. "What am I going to do." You sighed flopping on the couch. You laid down, pulling the blanket up you closed your eyes, trying to forget today. You woke up a few hours later, rushing to the bathroom, losing everything you had eaten. You sat back against the wall, rubbing your stomach "your gonna be hard on mommy aren't you?" You whispered looking down. You crawled back to the living room, grabbing your phone you called the tower, telling them you wouldn't be in the next day before putting it on silent as you climbed in bed to attempt to sleep.
You heard a knock on the door, as you slowly lifted your head. "Whose there?" You called out laying your head back down closing your eyes. You felt a cold hand on your forehead making you sigh. You opened your eyes seeing Loki's concerned face. "Darling, are you alright?" He asked "I'm just tired, I'm fine." You said pressing your head to his hand. I've tried calling several times. Why haven't you answered?" He asked sitting down. "I put my phone on silent last night after I called work." You said rolling over. "Love that was two days ago." He said as you looked at him. "Come on, your sweating to death, you need a shower and I'm taking you to Bruce." He said pulling the blankets back. "But Loki I don't want.." you started "your going, now come on, I'll help you." He said picking you up.
You made it to the tower as Loki carried you bridal style to Bruce's office. "What's going on?" He asked as Loki layed you down. "She has slept for two days, she's been ill, and sweating profusely." He said pushing your hair back. "Ok, let's run some tests, Loki you go sit over there." He said as a nurse came over to look your over. "Y/n, I finished all your tests, I think you know what I found." He said looking at you as you nodded. "I'll send him over, you need to talk to him. This may be harded on you because of his heritage." He said rubbing your shoulder.
Loki walked over, kissing your forehead "did he tell you anything?" You asked as he shook his head "no, he said I needed to hear it from you." He said pulling a chair up, holding your hand. "Loki..." you said clearing your throat "i....I'm pregant." You said looking at him. "I totally understand if you want to leave, or break up with me, I just..." you rambled as Loki's hand covered your mouth "You think I would leave you?" He asked pulling his hand back. "I don't know, we never talked about kids, and I didn't even know if you wanted kids." You fidgeted with your hands. "I'm not going anywhere y/n." He said standing up.
"Bruce thinks that maybe your heritage, if the baby is a frost giant, that that may be making things harder." You said looking up at him. "Well, I may have to stay with you all the time to take care of you then." He smiled as he kissed your forehead. "I will speak with Tony about your condition. I don't want you losing your job." He said "t..thank you Loki" you smiled up at him, feeling a tear fall. "No, thank you darling, you two are the best things that ever happened to me." He smiled rubbing your belly. "I love you Loki." You said pulling him down to you "and I love you, both of you." He said kissing you deeply.
You couldn't wait to start a family with him...
šŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’š
@vbecker10 @high-functioning-lokipath @buttercupbestie @cabingrlandrandomcrap @lonadane @mcufan72 @daggers-and-mischief @lily-sinclair-2006 @lokisninerealms @lokiprompts @limiworld @mochie85 @sinsandguilt @chickencouncilrep @lulubelle814 @midnights-ramblings @commanding-officer @xorpsbane @waiting-for-cas-to-save-me @stupidthoughtsinwriting @lokixryss @froggiecky @intoxicatinginsanity @huntress-artemiss @sekaishell @slpnbty2001 @your-taste-on-my-lips @usagishira @lokis-coffee221 @kats72
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clandestineloki Ā· 3 years ago
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Ooh I would love if you could write about Loki getting so jealous that he is punishing the reader because he saw her with a guy, but she was actually just buying a new dagger for Loki's birthday and thinks she messed up and cries and loki is sooo sorry???
oh no :((( i didn't ask for hurt :((( JK I'M STILL DOING THIS
so the guy is bucky
and bucky was just showing you something on his phone
a kind of dagger both of you knew loki would like
but loki took it the wrong way
he didn't see the phone so he thought you and buck were just holding hands
and you felt your heart sink when he sternly instructed you to the bedroom, slipping on leather gloves as he followed you in.
"are you not satisfied with me, pet?"
"i am! i am!" you sob, gripping the sheets tightly.
"then why were you all up in barnes's face?"
you shriek when his hand comes down on your ass, tears blurring your vision.
"i- i- i-" you sniffle, feeling ashamed. "he was showing me a gift."
he chuckles, almost in disbelief. "a gift? for you? why on earth would he-"
"no! no!" you shake your head. "i asked him what to-" you hiccup and choke on your tears. "i asked him what to get for your birthday."
loki snaps out of the state he's been in for the past three hours, eyes widening in horror at what he's done to you. oh norns, all you wanted was to give him something out of pure love, and he blindly assumes that you- the person he trusts most in his life- you would throw yourself at someone else-
"darling- shit- i-" he hoists you up from the bed, sitting you up and wiping away your tears, heart breaking with every sob you release.
he nearly claws his own hands in the haste of getting the leather gloves off, and caresses your cheeks delicately in the hopes that the gentle contact will help you come back down to him.
you're absolutely broken, shoulders shaking as you look down at yourself in shame. "i'm so sorry- i shouldn't've- i-"
loki gasps sadly, pressing a kiss to your lips, then another, then another. "no, no, no, i'm so sorry love, i shouldn't have jumped to conclusions."
he tilts your chin up ever so gently, thanking the stars that you don't flinch away from his touch.
but when you meet his eyes, despite the relief he feels when he finds no fear in your eyes, there's something else in them- the look on your face when you think you've done something terribly wrong.
"i'm sorry," you sniffle. "shouldn't've asked buck-"
"love, love!" loki whispers, pulling you onto his lap. "no, please, you've done nothing wrong. i should be grateful you're even getting me something."
his chest tightens when he notices the tiny wince you make as your bum gets sore from the punishment you didn't even deserve.
"darling," he guides you to lie down on his chest, "i'm so sorry. it's not your fault. you didn't do anything wrong. i'm sorry. thank you for always thinking of me."
you nod, and he sighs, running his fingers through your hair. "i really don't deserve you, do i?"
you look up at him, pulling him into a hug, and mumble shyly, "i'd show you the dagger if you like, but it's still on the way... won't be here till... tomorrow."
loki feels his heart clench. a minute ago you were struggling to speak because of the sting of your ass and the sobs racking through you, and now that you can talk the first thing that comes to your mind is being sorry that you don't have his gift yet?
"darling," he coos, pressing delicate kisses to your neck. "don't worry about that, i'll love it either way."
he smiles when he hears the tiny hum you let out, and works a bit of his ice magic to help soothe the soreness of your butt.
"i love you, you know that?" he whispers. "i became jealous when i saw you and barnes getting too close."
before you can apologize again, he cuts you off. "but that was no reason to take it out on you before getting your side of the story."
loki brushes his lips against yours, looking up at you and smiling sadly. "i'm sorry."
you shake your head, "no, no, baby, it's okay-"
"shush," he cuts you off. "stop it, go to sleep, darling. tomorrow i'm spending the rest of the day with you and i'm not leaving your side until i've convinced you you're the best girl in my life."
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lokisprettygirl Ā· 3 years ago
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Hit me Baby, One more Time (Wrestler Loki x Female Reader)
Read Chapter 26 here
Chapter 27
Summary : You learn more about loki and you can't help but want to know more about those skeletons in his closet.
Warning : 18+ Some dirty situations, daddy kink, Child abuse, traumatic childhood incident, Animal abuse
Note : As a pet owner who recently got sick, this was hard to write but I had this in my mind since the beginning so I didn't want to discard it (and it has happened to someone I know really well ) There are people like Odin who legit exist and it breaks my heart for everyone who have to live with such abusers.
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"Because I can't become a father, got sterilized when I was 21"Ā 
You looked at him shocked as he revealed yet another thing about himself, something you were not expecting from him.
"You did what?" You asked him like a moron even though you understood him very well and he tilted his head "Vasectomy, heard of it?" He asked you, his tone a little on the harsher side "Yesss I ..I " you mumbled and he pulled himself away from you. He didn't know what kind of reaction he expected from you, but your hesitation bothered him. He wanted to go back to his shell and never come out of there.
"Why did you do that?" You asked him and he grabbed his jacket from the bed to put it on "None of your business" . You teared up as you heard his voice devoid of any feelings.Ā 
"Sorrry, I'm sorry" you muttered mindlessly, you didn't know what you did to offend him. But he seemed upset.
If he was going to leave again, you promised yourself that you won't stop him or see him ever again.
When he heard your broken voice he looked at you, you were looking down and his heart clenched. This is what he'd always do, he'd hurt you and then walk out and come back to hurt you again, just like Odin. He had a decision to make right now, he could leave right now and never bother you again or he could stay and wipe your tears, and make you feel better and not do this again. You did nothing wrong, you must be curious to know more, this is what you two decided to do right? Learn more about each other?
He walked closer to you and he cupped your cheeks, then he wiped your tears from both of his thumbs "Why are you crying?" He asked you and you looked at him.
"I thought you were going to leave" he sighed as he heard you, he did think about it "I am not leaving okay? Stop crying, don't let me hurt you, I'm an asshole you know that" he mumbled as he kissed your forehead "Only sometimes" you mumbled and he smiled at the adorable sound of your voice.
"Do you know how fucked up my kid would turn out to be?" You looked at him as he asked you or told you that "That's what you think" he smiled and you pulled him closer by grabbing his jacket "Does it bother you that I could never be a real daddy?" He asked you and you thought about it.
Whatever is happening between you two is definitely not normal and is definitely toxic to say the least, but at the same time you don't want to stop, a part of you is always inclined to trust him for some reason. Now you see what he meant when he said he won't be able to give you everything in future. But the future is not here yet, he's here and he's in your arms.
"It's your life, your body, you can do whatever you want, why would it bother me? I was just curious to know your reason for doing it so young" You told him and he was a little surprised by your answer,Ā 
Ā "Well kids are overrated, bringing another life and all that shit isn't a miracle, it's just evolution, just a pointless need to leave a fragmentĀ  behind when you're gone" you nodded your head and he picked you up then he sat you down on the dresser. That's what he thought about relationships too but you changed it. He was scared about you changing him more.
"Let me order that coffee" you mumbled as you tried to step down but he didn't allow you "Did you want it? With him? With Jackass" He asked you and you sighed. You did want it all, a year ago you were sure that you'd end up marrying Jack and have his kids, a family "It doesn't matter if I did, it's all gone now" you told him honestly and you couldn't read the expression on his face.
The thought of you being Mrs Hudson, and bearing little jackasses in your womb filled him with intense jealousy, he knew he was fucked for you, but as soon as things got a little emotion heavy he wanted to take a step back, but moments like this, where the fear of losing you forever hit him out of nowhere, all he wanted to do was hold you and never let anyone else even look at you. He was being unfair he knew that, but he didn't want to stop. A guy like Jack would only bring you pain, nothing else, he would bind you into a marriage and burden you with kids, then as soon as he steps out in the real world, he would act like a free man, act as if the world's most beautiful woman isn't waiting for him at home.
"Good because you deserve better" Not that he was any better.Ā 
You wrapped your arms around his neck and you kissed him like that, your legs wrapped around his waist Instinctively. As soon as he felt your lips on his, he lost all his thoughts and worries "Would you stay the night? Cuddle me please" you mumbled and he looked at you
"Mmm okay, but I need something from you" you smirked, waiting for a filthy sexual request but he surprised you again with something thoughtful.
"If you clear this round, which you will, I want to move you somewhere safer, is that okay?" He asked you and you sighed. You'd like to get out of this dingy hotel too but you can't "I can't afford it Loki, I don't have a job here yet, i'm living off my savings" you told him honestly and he kissed your forehead.
"Move into my mama's house? She'd get a company and you won't have to worry about spending your savings on accomodation, besides she has taken a liking to you" he whispered in your ear as he kissed your temple and you thought about it. His mom likes you, the thought made you blush. It's so strange that he has met your parents and you met his mom too, and it's not even a relationship. But That would be too weird right? It would be like moving in with him "But you'd be there? And we are not there yet " You asked him and he smirked
"I can find another place if that makes you uncomfortable'' What is this enigma of a man? You really don't understand him sometimes.
"I don't want to separate you from your mother Loki, how long are you going to be here?" You asked him and he tilted his head.
"I'm contractually obligated to fight for WWE, at least one fight per week so 6 days here and one day in NY, You must not know this but thor challenged me to win the battle of the year, it's the MMA's most prestigious tournament" he told you and you pretended as if you didn't know anything about it. You heard it all.
"Oh that sounds rough, just so you know I'm on your side" you smiled and he did the same "You better be, I do need to talk to you about the journey he took with you" he mumbled and you gulped nervously "Not now though" you took a deep breath at that.
You kissed him again and then you took a shower, while you were in the bathroom, he called Frigga to let her know that he won't come home tonight.
"I'm with Birdy, mama" he told her and she gasped "He's with birdy" she whispered to Martha and Martha's eyes widened "Did you share your concerns with her?" She asked him and he responded in yes.
"What did she say?" She asked again curiously and he smiled "She understood, thank you for the help" he chuckled and he hung up soon after.
When you came out, you were wearing just a skimpy tank top along with shorts, didn't really leave much to imagination, he knew you were trying to torture him. You heard the knock on the door, must be the room service with your tea, since you both were about to sleep you ordered tea to relax.
"Stay there, I'll take it" he told you as he looked at your indecent attire and you smirked. Once he took it, he made the tea, all English style and that made you think of something "Are you from England?" You asked him and he stared at you, you were applying body lotion on your bare legs, he was trying to control the urge to pound you until you pass out. So It took him a while to answer "No" He didn't want to lie to you but you were not ready for the truth either.
"Why the accent then?" You asked him as you remembered frigga had the same English accent and so did Thor "It sounds cool" he told you and you shrugged, not wanting to press further.Ā 
He passed you the cup and you put it on the dresser. He stood behind you, his eyes focused on you in the mirror so he got on his knees and pushed your hair aside, placing a kiss on the nape of your neck, the touch made you shudder. No this was supposed to be your game, you were supposed to entice him with erotic lotioning.
"Squirt" he whispered in your ear and you felt your face heating up "Whatt?" You asked him and he smirked "The lotion, dirty girl" he placed his palm in front of you in a supine position so you squirted a dollop of lotion on it "More" he whispered again so you did it again.Ā 
Then he rubbed his palms together and placed it on your bare shoulder, then he slid his hands downwards, excruciatingly slow, you tried to stifle the moan but you failed. So easy.
"Drink your tea babygirl" he whispered in your ear and then he sucked on your neck, you picked your cup off the dresser and he could notice your hands shaking. He nudged the cup towards your lips and you took a sip, he took the bottle of the lotion and squirted some more of it on his palms then he rubbed them over your clavicles. The ball, officially out of your field zone.
His long thick fingers trailed dangerously close to your breasts, but every time you thought he'd put his hands inside and cup your breasts, he would pull them back, his thumb rubbing against your back in a circular motion.
Then he brought his hands downwards on your thighs, and massaged the lotion on your upper thighs, again his hands teased you as his thumbs ran over the insides of your thigh. You hate him so much.
Then all of a sudden his one hand cupped your mound and the other one wrapped around your throat in a choking position. And that's when you dropped the cup, the warm liquid spilled all over the floor. FuckĀ 
"You think you can play me silly girl? You're trembling just from me touching your bare skin innocuously" you put your head down on his shoulder as you moaned "I'm sorrrry Daddy" you whined as you mumbled, he couldn't believe how easily you slipped into the submissive position without even realising it
He pressed his palm over your clothed heat and the pressure of his other hand tightened on your neck, his hands so big that his fingers almost met with his thumb on the nape of your neck.
He kissed your cheek on the right side, he wanted to destroy you, he wanted to take you all night long and he knew you wouldn't be opposed to it if he coaxed you just a little more. But he didn't want to do that to you, not when you clearly mentioned that you won't let him fuck you before you clear the next round.
"Don't be sorry babygirl, it's okay, daddy loves it when you are being so desperate for him, look at yourself" he asked you to look at yourself in the mirror, you felt ashamed. You truly looked pathetic as you sat there breathing heavily and zoned out but you'd be lying if you said you didn't enjoy every second of it.
"Property damage, you're such a bad little thing" he pulled his arms away from you, leaving you all weak in your knees and then he picked up the broken shards up from floor, he didn't want you to hurt yourself at night. You just sat there looking at him mindlessly as he cleaned the floor. Once he discarded the shards in the trash bin he picked you up from the dressing chair and he laid you down on the bed.Ā 
Then he took his jacket off, the athletic top followed, and his jeans too. He was only left in his black briefs, you could see the outline of his cock "Calvin Klein?" You giggled and he raised his eyebrows as he laid down next to you "What? I endorse them " he chuckled, slightly amused by your fits of giggles. You're adorable.
You wrapped your arms around his waist and he pulled you closer, he let out a contented sigh as he felt your warmth.Ā 
"Birdy?" You hummed as you heard him, you didn't realize how exhausted you felt until you laid down on the bed, in his comfortable embrace "Thank you"Ā 
"For what?" You asked him and you placed a soft kiss on his neck "For seeing me today, for listening to me, for trusting me" he mumbled and you looked at him, he leaned down to kiss you and you smiled between the kisses.
Next morning he woke you up and you both showered ,Separately, then you had breakfast together. He didn't try to seduce you again and you were thankful for that. You had to go to the studio and he had to go to the gym, so he decided to drop you. He had to go home to change his clothes anyway.
Ā When you reached the studio, Nina greeted you and then she left. Mack was still not there and Loki didn't want to leave you all alone, so he stayed with you.
"if you're getting late you can leave, he's on his way" you told him as he kept looking at his watch. He walked over to you and he wrapped his arms around your waist to pull you closer "See me later?" He asked you and you nodded your head. Then you got on your tippy toes and he smiled "Trying to kiss me?" He chuckled as he watched you struggling to reach himĀ 
"You said you wanted me to kiss you before you leave me" he cupped your cheeks and he leaned his head down so he could kiss you. Truth to be told, He didn't want to leave you, he craved your company, he wanted to keep you with him all the time, What have you done with him?
"Y/n?" You heard mack's voice and pulled away from Loki, he turned around and smiled at Mack, Mack was giving you a look and then he walked towards loki in an angry manner and loki seemed amused "You kissed my girlfriend" he raised his voice and your eyes widened so you shook your head and made a cut it out gesture with your hand so he relaxed.Ā 
It wasn't not humiliating for Mack to say the least "When can I pick you up?" Loki asked you and you told him to see you in a few hours. He leaned down and kissed you again before he left.
"You're dating the hottie now? Could have told me, I made a fool of myself" he said to you and you winced, you'd be embarrassed too if it was you
"I'm sorry and we are not dating, I told you it's complicated" he huffed and you hugged him to calm him down "Are you looking for places for us to stay if we get in" you asked him. For now he was staying with a few frat boys he knew and that's why you couldn't stay with him.
"No I don't want to jinx it" he shrugged and you sighed. You thought about the offer Loki gave you last night. A very generous offer. But you couldn't help and wonder if it would complicate things? Besides living in a mansion? What would you tell your parents?
Once you got done with the rehearsals, Mack had to leave to do something personal. He doesn't tell you everything which is okay, you don't either, but he's your only friend and you don't want to lose him in the glittery limelight of LA. Just 5 more days and your fate will be decided
Ā You couldn't stop wondering what would happen to this Thing with Loki if you had to go back. Wow you felt stressed all of a sudden.
When Loki picked you up, you didn't fail to notice the bruises on his cheeks. His pretty face seemed busted. "What happened ?" You asked him as you caressed him with your fingers and he shrugged "Boxing"Ā 
He unbuckled himself and leaned down to kiss you as if he was longing for it from ages, well it has been a few hours. He left you all breathless and craving for more as he pulled away "How did the rehearsals go? Did you hurt yourself somewhere again?" He asked you and you nodded your headĀ 
"Actually yes" you rotate your arms and show him a bruise starting to develop on the back of your arms.
He shook his head as he buckled your seatbelt "Be careful tomorrow or I'll have to punish you for being a careless little birdy" he winked at you and you didn't know if you wanted to be careful or more careless.
"Can I ask you something?" You asked him as he drove and he nodded "Your mom told me she used to take you for dance classes, did you like dancing?" He looked at you intently and then he looked ahead "Yeah" he sighed.
"What happened to birdy?" You asked him again and he smiled "I gagged her because she couldn't stop asking questions" you looked at him confused for a second then you shook your head. Then his smile diminished and his demeanor changed.
"Odin left her out in the yard one day" he said after few seconds and you looked at him
"Why did he do that?" You questioned him again and he shrugged .
"He liked punishing me whenever I did something wrong"Ā 
"What did you do to warrant such a cruel punishment?"Ā 
"I lost my first fight"Ā 
"Against who?"Ā 
"Thor"
"How old were you then?"
"I was 9"Ā Ā Ā 
"That's-" you were going to say something again but he cut you off "Enough birdy"Ā 
You looked to the side as he said that, you knew Odin was an abusive husband and the shit he pulled with Loki and Darcy, and now this made you believe that loki wasn't spared from his abuse either. The thought broke your heart.
"By the way she didn't fly away, he fed her to our neighbor's doberman"
You looked at him shocked and your eyes teared up as you heard that, when he reached your hotel, he unbuckled your seat belt and pulled you closer on top of him "Did you see him do that?" You asked him as you sniffed and he kissed your forehead softly "He made sure that I would"Ā 
"I'm so sorry" you wrapped your arms around his neck tightly and he teared up, he swore to himself that he'd never cry over birdy again, but right now the way you tried to comfort him, he couldn't help but feel that pain again.
"Its okay y/n, I'm okay" he told you and you looked at him. He was hiding so much pain inside him, the more he revealed about his past, you could see why he became so emotionless and why he wasn't able to feel anything for anyone for a long time.
"Did your mom know about this?" You asked him as you caressed his cheeks and he shook his head "She thinks birdy flew away, and that's what I want her to think"Ā 
You didn't say anything after that, you just kissed him until you could see the pain in his eyes fading and it got replaced with lust instead.
"If you don't want me to fuck you senseless, you shouldn't tempt me like this" he whispered and you opened the door of the driver's side and got out as you smirked. He followed you quickly after that.
You thought about all the kissing and touching you'd do once you reach your room. And you did.
After a heavy makeout session you decided to cuddle and sleep. But something kept bothering you, the bruises on his cheeks healing quickly. You have never seen anything like that. You didn't know how it was even possible but you didn't want to question him more. At Least not today.
Next morning he had to see a few people for the upcoming photo shoot so he dropped you at the studio and you didn't see him for the rest of the day.Ā 
However when you got back to your hotel, you had someone waiting to see you. But it wasn't Loki.
āž–āž–āž–āž–āž–āž–šŸ’ššŸ’ššŸ’šāž–āž–āž–āž–āž–
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imaginationintowords Ā· 4 years ago
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Folklore [song series]
this is me trying
Modern Day AU! Steve Rogers x OC!Reader; Bucky Barnes x Natasha Romanoff
Plot: Inspired by Taylor Swiftā€™s new album folklore. The story follows the timeline of Bucky and Elizabethā€™s life throughout the years.
word count: 3592
[a/n: Iā€™m so sorry that itā€™s taken me so long to update this and my other story. iā€™ve been busy with school and work. thank you for your continued patience and support]
previous part
Series Masterlist
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Age: 20 Year: Dec. 2014 Location: Brooklyn, NY
"How have you been James?ā€
Bucky looks out the window to his right. Hands grasped together in his lap as he sits on the dark green sofa across from the woman he's been seeing for the last 5 months.
He ponders the question, making sure to answer it honestly. He looks back at her giving her his full attention again.
"Good," he answers truthfully, a small smile planted on his face. Life has been good. School is going incredibly well. My job is going better than I could've imagined. Really learning a lot."
"How are things going with Natasha?" The older lady asks.
ā€œGreat. Really great," Bucky says with a slightly bigger smile.
"Good. I'm glad to hear that," she smiles back, proud to the see progress James has made since his first visit moths ago.
After the blow up he and Steve had, Bucky fell into a depressive state. He refused to talk to anyone about what had happened. It wasn't until his younger sister Rebecca came to talk to him:
"I get you don't want to talk to any of us about what happened last week," she said as Bucky laid in bed looking out the window, his back facing her, "But you can't just stay in bed, hiding for the world. Starving yourself isn't going to solve anything.
"Sulking is only going to make you worse. It's not healthy, Buck. We're all worried. Ma is incredibly worried. She's barely been eating. I hear her wandering the house at all hours, because she can't sleep."
"You don't want to talk to us, fine. But you need to talk to someone. If not for yourself, but for Ma. Please," she begs, before leaving Bucky alone to ponder what she said.
He knew he wasn't coping the healthy way. He hadn't realized how much he was affecting his family by shutting down. The last thing he wanted to do was worry his mother. So he got himself up, took a shower, ate breakfast with his family. They were surprised to see him come down, but tried not to draw any extra attention to it. Rebecca gave him an understanding nod, which he reciprocated. After breakfast, he began his research. He decided to listen to Rebecca's advice and find someone to talk to someone to help him make sense of what is going on in his mind.
And that's how he ended up in Dr. Abraham's office.
"Have you contacted Steve yet?" She asks.
"No," he answered fiddling with his fingers, "I feel embarrassed about the way I reacted."
"That's normal, James," she assured him, "But in order to repair any damage that's been cost, you need to talk to Steve. To move forward. From what you've told me he's a very understanding person. I'm sure once you've apologized and explain to him the steps you've taken to help your mental health, I'm sure he'd be willing to accept you back into his life."
"I'm not so sure," he looked down at his hands.
"You won't know until you've tried. Listen, I'm not here to tell you what to do or what not to do. I'm just here to help you navigate your thoughts a little better. In a more healthy way. If you're really serious about living a more healthier mental life, I think you should talk to him. You don't want to really throw this lifelong friendship away, do you?"
"No, I don't," he shakes his head.
"Good. Remember to be honest," she tells him, "Vulnerability isn't a bad thing. Your feelings aren't a nuisance. it's how you handle them is what matters. I'm not saying you have to talk to him as soon as you walkout of here. I just want you to start making the notion of doing so. Our time is just about up, how about we do this. Some homework for the week.
"I want you to write a letter to Steve. Bring it in next week, you don't have to read it. But I would like to discuss it. What do you say?"
"Okay, I could do that," he agreed.
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Christmas week
Steve and Elizabeth flew back home a few days before Christmas. They put their bags in the trunk of their rental car.
The car ride was silent for awhile, both tired after a long flight, now sitting in traffic on their way back to their parents' place. This would be their first time back to Brooklyn since the whole Bucky situation. The road trip back to California was fun, but there was a looming sadness over Steve. It's not like he regrets standing up to Bucky he doesn't. He just wishes thing would've played out differently. He really wished Bucky would've talked to him before he left back to California.
"How are you feeling about being back?" Elizabeth asks, while they sat in traffic.
"I don't know," Steve sighs, "Feels weird going back home and not talking to Bucky."
"Maybe you should try calling him. It's been a few months. I'm sure he'd be willing to hear you out," she said, rubbing his right arm.
"I don't want to push him," Steve said through gritted teeth, his grip on the steering wheel getting tighter.
Bucky had been a touchy subject the last few months. During the first month Elizabeth would ask Steve if he'd heard from him, the answer always being no, followed by Steve shutting down. After that Elizabeth stopped asking, noticing how much it was affecting Steve, but the constant reminder of it wasn't helping. She knew that if Bucky ever did call, Steve would tell her. The only thing she could do was be patient and be there for Steve whenever he needed her.
The holidays kept everyone busy. On Christmas Eve. Steve spent it with Elizabeth's family at her grandma's house. Elizabeth found herself watching Steve play with her younger cousins, she couldn't help but giggle when they roped him into a tea party. She found herself imagining a future where Steve would do the same with their own children. She quickly shook the daydream away. Reprimanding herself a little for even thinking about kids at their young age.
On Christmas morning Elizabeth and Steve spent it with his parents. It was a nice peaceful day just lounging around in their pajamas. For dinner, Elizabeth's parents went over to have dinner at the Rogers' house. It was a nice little send off dinner for their parents who were leaving for Mexico to spend the New Years for a couples' getaway.
Elizabeth and Steve were heading to the Hamptons to spent NYE with Wanda, Thor, Loki, and Scott. They had planned to have a nice, peaceful trip.
While Steve and Elizabeth were at the Hamptons, Bucky and Natasha were spending their NYE at his family's beach cottage in Port Washington.
They were cuddled on the couch surrounded by take out containers, watching the New Years Eve special waiting for midnight to happen.
Bucky got up about 15 minutes to midnight to grab something from the kitchen. He walked back into the room with a new bottle of champagne and two champagne flutes.
"Got some champagne," he said holding it up for Natasha to see.
"Um," Natasha awkwardly shifted in her seat, "Actually about that."
Bucky looked at Nat confused, putting the bottle and flutes down on the coffee table before sitting back down next to her.
"What's wrong" he asked, grabbing the tv remote to mute the tv, and give Natasha his full undivided attention.
"So there's something I haven't told you," she says looking down at her fidgeting fingers.
"You're worrying me Nat," Bucky said, grabbing her hands to help ease her nerves
She looked up to meet his worry filled eyes.
"I'm pregnant," she announced.
Bucky eyes widen at her announcement, instantly dropping her hands. The look on her face showing she was telling the truth.
"How is that possible?" He asks in disbelief, "We've been so careful. We use double the protection. Condoms and you're on the pill."
"Actually about that," she nervously shifted under his intense gaze, "I haven't been on birth control in a little over two months."
"What?" Bucky yelled, quickly rising from his seat, "What do you mean you haven't been on birth control in a little over two months?"
"I got off of it," she shrugged trying to play it off, "It's my body and I can do what I want with it. And I just wanted to give my body a break, I've been on the pill since I was 15."
"I get it's your body, Natasha, I'm all for you doing whatever you want," he stresses, "but you should've told me. I'm your boyfriend, we have sex frequently. You should've at least had the respect of your sexual partner, letting him know that you were no longer on birth control. So in that case I could've been a tad more careful."
"We were using condoms," she half heartedly defended herself.
"They aren't 100% effective Natasha," he gripped his hair, in complete disbelief over this entire conversation, "You even know that. That also doesn't defend yourself for not telling me. You should've told me."
"I'm sorry. It's not like I was planning for this to happen," she yelled.
Bucky just stared at her like she just grew two heads. How is she not freaking out, he thought. They were clearly way too young for this. Which is why they took precautionary measures.
After a few moments of silence Natasha spoke up, "I'm keeping the baby."
Bucky didn't know what to say. He felt the room closing in on him. He started having a hard time catching his breath.
"James," Natasha quietly said, getting up to check on him. He raised his hand, silently telling her to stay where she's at.
He headed for the back door, the house felt too suffocating for him. He walked through the the small yard to the gate that led to the beach. Stumbling around.
To a stranger they would just think he's drunk. In reality he was just having a panic attack.
It was all too much. His mind was racing.
She's pregnant. With a baby. My baby. I'm going to have a kid. I'm going to be a dad. I'm not ready to be a dad. My dad was shit. God I can't be like my dad. I'm not ready for all of this.
He put his hands on his knees, hunched over trying to catch his breath. But he just couldn't. He did the only thing he could think of. He pulled out his phone and dialed the only person he knew would help.
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Steve and Elizabeth were laughing with their friends, waiting for the countdown to begin. Steve felt his phone vibrating in his pocket. He moved his shoulder off of the back of the couch, where Elizabeth was cuddled up against.
He pulled his phone out and his heart dropped at the name that appeared. He quickly got up and walked out of the living room and upstairs to the room where he was staying in for the week.
Wanda raised her eyebrow at Elizabeth, who just shrugged her shoulders, equally as confused.
"Bucky?" Steve answered the phone, closing the door behind him. He could hear Bucky hyperventilating on the other side.
"Steve," he tried to get out.
"Buck, what's wrong?" Steve asked, pressing the phone even closer to his ear the sound of everyone downstairs counting down to midnight.
"Steve, I-," Bucky was struggling to get out.
"Buck, please try to calm down," Steve stressed, "Inhale, hold it for a few seconds and then exhale. You need to calm down. I can't help you, if I can't understand you."
Bucky tried his best to calm himself down, with Steve talking him through it.
"Now, can you explain to me what's wrong?" Steve asked, hearing Bucky's breathing leveling out more.
"I-I'm not re-ready Steve," Bucky stutters, sniffling his nose.
"It's okay take your time, I'm here whenever you're ready."
"No, it's Natasha.ā€
"What's Natasha? Is she okay?" Steve questioned, getting more concerned.
"Yes, she's fi-ine," he stuttered again, trying to say the words.
"Where are you Buck?" Steve asked, looking around for his shoes and keys.
"I'm at the beach cottage."
"I'm in the Hamptons. Is there any way you can meet me back at my place?"
"Yeah, I think I can," Bucky said a bit more calmer now.
"Okay, I'll see you soon."
When midnight struck Elizabeth went upstairs to check on Steve, making sure everything was okay. She could hear him on the phone talking to Bucky, trying to calm him down. She waited outside of the door to give them some privacy.
Twenty minutes later Wanda went to go check on them, to find Elizabeth sitting on the floor.
"Is everything okay?" She whispered.
"I don't know," she answered, "I'm waiting for Steve. You can head back down, I'll be down shortly."
"Okay. We're here if you guys need anything," Wanda said before walking back down.
After another 25 minutes Elizabeth heard Steve hang up the phone. She softly knocked on the door, and let herself in. She walked in to see Steve frantically going around the room collecting his things.
"Steve is everything okay?"
"It's Buck. He called me while he was having a panic attack. Something about Natasha," he tells her.
"Is she okay?"
"I think so. I was able to calm him down. I need to get back home," he said putting his things in his suitcase.
"Okay. I completely understand. Do you want me to go with you for the drive?" She asked.
"I don't want you to have to cut your time here short," he says, feeling guilty for bringing this on her.
"Steve, something is clearly going on with Bucky. I want you to go to him, but maybe it's best if I drove. I haven't had a drink in hours, and you seem too frantic. Please let me help," she pleaded, placing her hand on his stopping him.
Steve looked up and noticed the worry on Elizabeth's face.
"Okay," he gave in, "We'll need to leave as soon as we can."
Elizabeth nodded, quickly grabbing her weekender bag and start shoving things in. If they forgot anything's he knew Wanda would bring it back.
They said their quick goodbyes and were on the road within 5 minutes, with Elizabeth behind the wheel and Steve fidgeting in the passenger seat.
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Bucky took a few minutes to himself on the beach, trying to make sure his anxiety was at rest before he headed back inside. When he entered the house, Natasha shot up from her seat.
"Happy New Years," she awkwardly said, trying to cut the obvious tension.
"Umm," Bucky scratched his head looking everywhere but at Natasha, "We need to leave."
"What?"
"I mean, you can stay if you want and I'll pick you up tomorrow," he rephrased, "But I can't stay here. I need to go. Steve is meeting me at his house."
"Steve?" She was taken back by that mention, not expecting to hear Bucky say his name. He hasn't mentioned Steve in months.
"Yeah, I called him," Bucky says rubbing the back of his neck.
"Well that's good right?"
"Yeah, listen. I really need to go, so are you going to stay or come with me?"
"To see Steve?"
"No. I would drop you off at your place," he tells her, "I'm seeing Steve alone."
"Will she be there?"
Natasha didn't really know exactly why Steve and Bucky weren't talking, at first. Then she heard that Steve and Elizabeth were dating, and it all made sense. The only person that could tear Bucky and Steve apart. She never told Bucky that she knew. Figured it wasn't worth the fight. Especially not now when she was carrying his child.
To an outsider it might seem like she got pregnant on purpose, but that wasn't the case. She knew they were too young for this, at least that's what she thought when she first found out about the pregnancy a week ago. But now that she's sat with it she's taking it as a sign that this is meant to happen. She's just really hoping that Bucky would see it, if not now but eventually.
"Listen, Natasha, I don't have time for this," he looks her in the eyes, "Are you coming or not?"
"I'll get my bag," she remarked with a snark tone, walking passed him to their shared room.
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A couple of hours later Bucky was pulling up in front of the Rogers' house. 2:15 am read the clock in his car. He looked to his right, out the passenger side window to see a dark figure sat on the front steps of the house.
Bucky took one last breath before exiting the vehicle.
As soon as he opened the front gate Steve stood up from where he was sat on the stairs.
Once Bucky approached him both young men threw their arms around each other. Gripping each other tightly, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. They stayed like that for awhile. Relishing in the comfort of being back in each other's arms. Their silent fight no longer important. All they knew in that moment was everything was going to be okay, because no matter what they'll always have each other.
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Steve walked into his parents' living room holding two mugs of coffee. As he rounded the couch, he handed one to Bucky.
"Sorry, if I ruined any of your plans," Bucky apologized, "Tell Elizabeth I'm sorry for taking you away."
'Buck, don't worry about it," Steve waved him off, "She completely understands. And truth be told, I wasn't necessarily feeling in the New Year's mood."
"Yeah," Bucky sighs.
"Do you want to talk about what happened tonight?" Bucky nods his head, placing the coffee mug on the coffee table in front of him. He shifted his body to the left to face Steve.
"She's pregnant," he announces.
"What?" Steve asked, not expecting that to be the reason, he quickly placed his mug next to Bucky's.
"Yeah, my reaction exactly," Bucky said.
"What? How?"
"Apparently Natasha hasn't been on the pill in a couple of months," Bucky explains, "And even though we always used condoms, they aren't exactly 100% effective."
"Did you know she wasn't on the pill?"
"Nope," Bucky tells him, "If I knew I wouldn't been a bit more cautious."
"So she told you she was pregnant?" Steve said getting back to it.
"Yeah. She was so nonchalant about it. Like it was no big deal," Bucky stressed,
"How is she just so calm. We're not prepared for this. I'm not ready for this Steve. I can't be a dad. I don't even know how to be a decent human being."
"That's not true Buck," Steve disagreed.
"Come on Steve, we haven't talked in months, and we both know it's not because you didn't try," Bucky says, "I was so caught up in my own jealousy. And selfishness, that I never even considered your feelings or Elizabeth's. And I don't think I can ever make it up to you for treating you like you're nothing to me."
"You were hurt," Steve tried to excuse.
"Doesn't excuse the way I behaved," Bucky says, "I know that now."
"I've been seeing a therapist," Bucky informs him, "I never realized how much my mental health was taking a toll on those around me. So after our fight, I found someone to talk to. To work through the shit that's going on in my mind."
"How's that been going?" Steve asked.
"Good," Bucky gives a half smile, "Really good. She's good. I've realized a lot about myself that I didn't know. Working through all the issues I've had with my father leaving."
"That's good Buck. I'm proud of you, truly," Steve beamed, patting Bucky on the shoulder.
"I really am sorry for the way I behaved," Bucky repeated again.
"Buck, you really don't have to apologize again," Steve told him.
"I need to Steve," he said, "I can't believe I acted that way. I should've been happy for you and Elizabeth. I'm glad you two have each other. Seriously. I couldn't imagine her with anyone better, same goes for you. I won't cause any more issues for you two. It's not worth not having you in my life. You're my brother Steve, and I don't want to miss anything."
"Thanks, Buck. It really means a lot to me to hear that," Steve smiles, "Because I don't want to miss anything in your life also."
"Yeah, especially now," he says, the reality of why they're there dawning back.
"How are you feeling now about the baby?"
"I don't know, man," Bucky shakes his head, "I'm afraid I'm going to screw this up, like everything else."
"But now you're working on that," Steve reminds him, "And you're not going to be doing this alone. You have people who are always going to be there. I may be in California now, but I'm just a phone call away. You're not alone. But you do have to try Buck. That's all that you can ever do. Try your best, no one's asking you to be perfect, but as long as you're trying your best, that's what's important."
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Age: 21 Year: 2015
The sounds of a baby crying woke Bucky up from his sleep in the early depths of the morning. He quietly and quickly got out of bed, making his way to the small New York kitchen to make a bottle.
He walked into the small nursery where the two-month-old baby wailed from hunger.
"It's okay," Bucky shushed gently, picking up the small baby, "Daddy's here."
He adjusted the small baby in his arms before placing the bottle in the baby's mouth.
"There you go," he encouraged the small one, as soon as he heard the sounds of the baby drinking.
Bucky sat down on the chair in the corner of the room, opposite of the crib. He just stared as the newborn drank their bottle, while simultaneously falling asleep. Even though he was completely exhausted, he had never felt more happier. More at peace with where his life was at.
As long as he kept trying his best, he knows he can do this for the rest of his life.
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littlekinng Ā· 3 years ago
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I'm so happy that you posted the new fic!!! It was amazing!! So, let me gush about it for a bit:
Loki with abandonment issues? Chef's kiss.
This fic actually had a more Brodinsons-vibe for me than your previous Lokius fics (I'm saying this as a bad thing, just an observation), because of the whole Loki-has-issues-and-doesn't-look-after-himself-&-the-person-who-cares-underestimates-the-seriousness-of-the-issues-or-they-cannot-address-them-properly-due-to-circumstances thing. And you write it so well that I will gladly read it over and over again in your fics.
Also, this part: "Lokiā€™s face, which was crumpling rapidlyā€“ a shift that was subsequently all the warning Mobius had received before Loki was all but collapsing into his arms, a wretched wail working itself up from what sounded like the very depths of his lungs.
ā€œOā€“Okay,ā€ Mobius had grunted, dimly aware of the tears welling up from behind his own eyes as Lokiā€™s hands had begun to scrabble for purchase against the fabric of his jacket at his back. ā€œThere we go. Itā€™s alright. Weā€™reā€“ā€
Abruptly, Mobius had felt his throat close up to the point of near-constriction, before his own arms shot up to cinch tightly around Lokiā€™s waist, his next exhale shuddering almost painfully out of him." This is so amazingly wonderful that my vocabulary isn't big enough to cover it. I just love how Mobius helps Loki on instinct. He catches him and soothes him, and then suddenly his own emotions catch up and he just kind of crumbles a bit along with Loki. I rate it a 11/10.
When Mobius decided to go away, but only for 2 hours, my mind was still kind of holding onto the hope that Loki'd somehow sleep through them and would be none the wiser about Mobius's absence and then there was this sentence: "Four and a half hours later, Mobius staggered back into the TVA through a glowing orange Timedoor," and my brain was just like: yep, shit's going to hit the fan now. I was kind of sorry to be right, though because watching Loki thinking Mobius is not real was painful (the right kind of painful, though).
"Or, at the very least he had left it crackedā€“ wide enough that he might have been capable of catching sight of where he had left Loki curled atop the bed, had he turned to glance over his shoulder during his conversation with B-15 in the front doorway." This feels like such a nice small detail that emphasises how much Mobius cares and how he's scared that Loki will disappear again if he's not paying enough attention.
Which ties in so nicely with "Not this, he thought wearily, almost unaware of the sudden, hot stinging building behind his eyes.Ā Not this. Not again. Notā€“
Not again." where Mobius's own fears and trauma are more explicitly stated and I just love how both Loki and Mobius are kind of broken and I like imagining that they'll eventually manage to heal together.
The comfort part when they were in the office was probably my favourite part. And Mobius saying stuff like: ā€œLoki, sweetheart, you have to breathe for me.ā€ it just does something to me. I love it so much. Like, don't get me wrong, Mobius calling Loki "baby" is also great, but "sweetheart" is just on another level. It's kind of similar to the bit in looking in their eyes: ā€œBreathe, sweetheart.ā€ he whispered - practically begged - the endearment slipping out unbidden and almost entirely unnoticed. ā€œI know you can do it. Cā€™mon, now.ā€ This bit is actually one of my favourite parts of the fic, so I'm not complaining at all. In fact, I'm extremely happy, so feel free to have Mobius call Loki "sweetheart" in similar circumstances however many times you want. The way you write it just makes me have so many feels.
Also, let me point out how awesome it is to have B-15 in this fic. She's just totally no-nonsense and her priority is work which contrasts with Mobius's emotional prespective so well. Also, I think she's kind of in a similar position to Valkyrie in your Brodinsons fics, but they act dufferently. (I haven't re-read your Brodinsons fics for a while, so I hope I'm not misremembering something). Valkyrie is brash, but she still cares very much. B-15 cares, but she cares about Loki mostly in relation to Mobius and, as I mentioned, her priority is work. I like how the two stong female characters in similar roles can be just written differently and with different goals.
Thank you so much for writing the fic and sharing it with us!!! I also hope this wasn't too lengthy or annoying, because it kind of got away from me. I thought about posting this as a comment on the fic on ao3, but somehow sending it as an ask seemed more... appropriate? personal? Like, if you'd like me to crosspost this as a comment too, I totally can.
I'm already looking forward to the next fic you'll write whenever that may be!! (And also, if you would be willing to give us a sneak peek into when that may be or what's the fic going to be about, I'm certainly not going to stop you).
Have the most wonderful week!!
YOOOOOOO HOLY SHIT
i genuinely have no words to describe how grateful i am for this message. i truly didn't know if my putting a fic out there after so long would be met with anything but mild apathy, so something like this arriving in my inbox just a few hours after doing so ???? means the absolute world to me.
first off, just gotta say that i'm 100% with you-- Mobius calling Loki "sweetheart" is one of my absolute favorite things to write, and i'm gonna keep doling it out into my fics in excess, so i'm glad someone shares my adoration for it.
secondly, thanks so much for mentioning the fact that you enjoyed how i wrote B-15 !! she's such a great and unqiue character who - in my opinion - didn't get near the amount of screen time she was owed, so it's always fun to work with her character. i specificially appreciate you saying that you enjoyed how she played a similae role to the Valkyrie in some of my fics (someone has to have half a brain cell) but that she came off as a totally different character. that really means a lot, as i'm always trying not to write side-characters too similarly to one another. thank you !!
(also, i love love how you picked out the fact that Mobius was also fearful that Loki might disappear if he stopped paying attentuion for even a few moments...that was 100% implied, and i'm so glad to hear that it came across well enough to be understandable)
all this to say !!!!!!!!! this message literally means the world to me. thank you so, so so so much for taking the time to write it out and send it over. i appreciate it more than i can properly convey, and hope that you have a wonderful day/evening !!!
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devilbat Ā· 4 years ago
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Quarantine Onlineļæ¼
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A/N: sorry I have been MIA for months now. A lot has going on in my life and Depression sucks, making it hard to write, so forgive me.
Tom Hiddleston x Reader
Warnings: Just fluff
Summery: dating is hard it's even harder when a Pandemic happens.. ļæ¼
Ā  Ā Ā  The picture you stared at only showed a well-toned lean body in a well-tailored suit. Most of the photographs showed the same, never his face. His name was Tom 39 years old, living in London. Though he dose travels a lot for work. Shakespeare fanatic, runner, enjoys cooking, long walks with his dog when he's not running and lots and lots of dancing. Six foot one, six foot two on a good day. Who was testing the waters out there, but will be the perfect gentleman and very respectful.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  His profile stated as you looked through it. He had messaged you right as you thought about giving up once again. Everyone on these dating apps only wanted one of two things. Nudes or sex nothing more. No connection, no relationship, not even a friendship. Sure, you were offered friends with benefits.
That was something you were not looking for. Did it not state in your profile that you weren't going to do any of that. Do men even read?
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  The few dates you have gone on all ended up a bust. Then the quarantine happened right as you were getting yourself out there. So it was conversations via text. But soon you were ghosted far too many times because you wouldn't send nude.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  You were all about to shut down your account when this man named Thomas H. sent you a message. You weren't even sure why you click on the email from this man without a face. Here you were reading what he had to say.
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  Y/n,
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  My name is Thomas, but naturally, I go by Tom. I'm sure you might not even respond to this as there is no face to this profile. With my job and for my privacy would be one of many reasons why. But I thought I might give it a shot. And I have to say I'm quite mesmerized by your beauty. You are quite lovely, and I'm sure you get that a lot. But I genuinely mean it. I was a bit fascinated by your profile as I read it, might have had chucked at a few bits of it. I would like to know more about you.
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  Like what type of nerd are you? Marvel or DC?
Star Wars or Star Trek? And of course, I'll answer any questions you might have for me. As well I would not ask for any pictures of you clothed or nude as I would like to get to know you as I'm hoping you wouldn't mind getting to know me without the nudes as you put it. Ehehe.
Ā  Ā Ā  I genuinely hope to hear from you. But understand if I don't.
Sincerely, Tom.
Ā  Ā  Ps, I do hope this quarantine hasn't made you gone completely bonkers.
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  Usually, you wouldn't have responded, but something about him told you not to pass this up. What was the worst that could happen that already hasn't happened on an online dating app? Well, there was always the fact he could be a serial killer.
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  Hello Tom,
Ā  Ā  You may have messaged me in time I was about to give up on this site and return to my habit.Ā  Marvel all the way. I would hope you would agree or we can't continue talking. Though, I can't deny that DC needs to just stop with Batman movies. The should have stopped before George Clooney. Though I will give Christian Bale props, he did a better job than Clooney.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  As for Star Wars and Star Trek? That is a tough one, so I'm just going to say both are good. But let's face it. Captain Kirk is the better star fleet Captain. Sure Picard is excellent as well. But anyone after them just doesn't do it for me. Ha ha..
Ā  Ā Ā  And it's all about Baby Yoda. If you are not a baby Yoda fan, you're just wrong. Yes, I'm one of "those" girls.
Coffee or Energy drinks? I would say I dabbled in both. Pancakes or waffles? Yes, there is a difference. I'm a waffle girl myself. Well, that is all I can think of right now.
Y/n.
You hit send before setting your phone down on the table next to you as you yawned. Maybe it was an early bedtime, not like you had anything better to do. You puddled around your usual routine before bed. A loud ding brought you back to your phone.
"That was quick." Recognizing the chim of the app all too well. Grebing your phone, forgetting your face cream as you were curious about what he had to sayā€”settling into bed, getting comfortable before you opened your phone.
Y/n,
I'm delighted to hear from you. If I'm quite bold, and for starters, its tea for me. With two sugars and a splash of cream. As for waffles or pancakes, I'm French toast kind of man, duh. Lol. Though you can't beat a good old fashion English Breakfast and a side of Earl gray. Eheh.
I'm quite a fan of marvel though it is a rather vast universe. What movies/comics praytell do you prefer?
Sorry love to disappoint, but I'm going to say Doctor Who I am British. The tenth and the eleventh doctor. I do hope you've seen the show. I used to watch the reruns of the original with my father when I was a young wide eye lad. I am a fan of both Star Wars and Star Trek. And there is nothing wrong with liking a baby Yoda. He is exceedingly loveable.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  It says your new to England, where are you from originally? How long have you've been here? Seen any of the sights England has to offer?
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  That's all for now.
Sincerely, Tom.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Emails went on for weeks talking back and forth first on the dating app than via text. You were the one to leap by giving him your number. After hitting send your phone vibrated with a text.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  Unknown number: Hello love, this is Tom. I'm delighted to receive your text.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  More weeks had passed. Still, you had yet to see his face though he did send you photos of random things during the day. You did the same as your toes sticking out from the bubble bath. Then you got a text of his toes sticking out from under the blankets. The two of you would watch a movie together. The quarantine was still in effect. Each of you would pick a film out every other weekend and sit back and watch itā€”text throughout the movie.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Y/n: Omg did she just run up the stairs like a dumb big boobed bimbo!!! She makes the rest of us look bad.
Tom: Eheh, you said it darling, not me. Though I think she might survive this.
Y/n: Wanna make a beat? I think she will die within the next few minutes.
Tom: Oh, it's on. Now, what do I get if I win?
Y/n: Whatever it is you want cause mister you are going to lose.
You both patiently wanted to see what happens next. The movie ended, and you waited in annoyance for Tom to respond to gloat about being right. And to see what he desired for his spoils of war.
Tom: Well, Love, it looks like I have won this round.
Y/n: It seems you have butthead. What is it that the winner wishes for?
Tom: Did you just call me a butthead? Eheh. Hmm, let's see. How about a Skype date? I figured it was about time to reveal myself.
Y/n: Tom, I just meet you. I'm not sure I'm ready to see your eggplant. Haha.
Tom: I probably should have rephrased that better. My face love, my face. Eheh. Tomorrow at 7 pm?
Nervous was an understatement. You had cleaned your whole flat even if you were going to stay on the couch, laptop resting on a large pillow setting on your coffee table. You sat playing with your hair, unsure if you wanted it up or down. A chim from your computer startled you from straightening out your dress you finally had settled on. Soon a well-tailored suited chest came on screen.
Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Hold on, darling, trying to adjust this blood screen." The deep British,Ā very attractive yet somehow familiar voice rang through the computer speakers. You only assumed it belongs to Tom.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  You watched the man attempting to fiddle with the view, cursing ever so quietly. Making you giggle relaxing a little bit more. Your laughing came to an abrupt halt when Tom's face came into Focus. Your jaw dropped. And now the unmistakable "ehehe" came in to play as you stared at none other the most eligible bachelor in England none other than loki himself Tom Hiddleston.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Darling, I think your drooling." Tom teased point to the side of his clean, shaved face. Tom fidgeted with his now raven-colored hair.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  "Oh, I-I," You stammered out, trying to compose yourself.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Didn't see this coming did you?" Tom smiled, wetting his lips with that blasted tongue of his.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Well, no. I wasn't expecting Tom
Hiddleston."
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Is that a bad thing?" Tom spoke up.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Oh, no, no. I would be an idiot to say it was. Hey, wait a minute. I've told you that, that, that. Shit." You muttered.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  "That I was your hall pass if given a chance. Eheh. Well, it looks like you'll have had wasted your hall pass privileges. You only get one and can't use it on someone if you are already seeing them."
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  "You know, sir, you are still a butthead." You stuck out your tongue at the man.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  "You do like calling me that. Why are you calling me a butthead this time?" Tom grinned.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Your time with Tom was extraordinary, the two of you talked throughout most of the night. He told you things you never knew about the actor every woman pined over.Ā Here you were, the one woman out of a billion he seems to fancy.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "Well, love." Tom cooed as he watched you try not to nod off to sleep. "I should let you sleep."
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā Ā  "I'm sorry." You muttered sleepily.
Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  Ā  "Do not apologize, my dear. I should be the one to apologize I've kept you up most of the night.ā€ Tom smiled softly. He watched as you rub your eyes, a shy smile softly graced your lips. Making Tomā€™s heart flutter.
ā€Perhaps, my dear, would you like to meet for coffee at the cafe that opened back up?ā€ Tom hummed in high hopes.
ā€Hmm, I don't know.ā€ You smiled, trying hard to look like you were contemplating though you were going to say yes. To hell with this virus, it was Tom Hiddleston asking you to coffee.
ā€I mean, I'll wear a mask and stay six feet if needed.ā€ Tom added quickly.
ā€No, no, there is no need for that. I don't mind unless you feel like it's needed.ā€ You pipped upā€”Tom grind like a fool shaking his head no.
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t0th3-ark Ā· 3 years ago
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Introduction Page!
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Hello ladies, gents, and everyone in between, I'm Aster! Welcome to my fanfiction and brain rot page (mostly Mobius content). Some fun facts about me are *drumroll*:
18 yo. (my birthday is in May)
Non-binary, Bisexual here! (they/them or sometimes he/him is preferred.)
I'm going into my first year of college in the fall (oh lord).
My favorite color is either black or pink. It's a tie. (I know two different ends of the spectrum)
I graduated high-school this year (2021)
I work at cRAckEr BArrEL in the little shop they have at the front. (it's quite fun ngl. I get payed $10 an hour sometimes thats not enough to deal with ppl's shit and sustain how much I spend.)
I've only had one other job and it was at Kohl's (good lord that place gives me bad dreams).
I have like 4 friends and they all live at least 45 min+ from me same with online friends. (I'm lonely give me attention.)
I live in Texas were it's as hot as the Devil's anus iykyk. It's usually around 90 degrees on a regular basis. They all of a sudden it will be 2 degrees in the middle of spring. (Don't move here -1/10 do not recommend.)
It took my three Ā½ years to get my official driver's license and when I did it expired without me knowing and I drove with an expired license for a month. (BUT, I didn't get pulled over!)
I'm a SSBā„¢Ā  (simp since birth). I simp for a number of fictional characters such as, Mobius (that's obvious), Geralt of Rivia, Will Graham, Loki, Obi-Wan Kenobi (that one's slightly embarrassing), and others I don't remeber atm.
I have only started to gain confidence to post what I write on here. I will be making a request page for you guys to make requests on.
I've been writing fanfiction since I was a wee little 12 year old. Yes, I know, gross. I was really into Doctor Who fanfiction at that time. I wrote everything on paper cuz I didnt have a phone. (My parents found it recently. I almost "yeeted" myself out a window.)
I love frogs, rats, mice, and turtles (basically any goblincore-ish animal).
The energy I give off is bascially chaotic mentally-ill simpā„¢.
I honestly would write for a living but nobody gets paid enough to write fanfiction .
So instead I'm a visual arts major but that's to be determined.
All of my tiktoks are cringy, change my mind.
I was obsessed with mermaids as a kid, as all children 2015 were. I even made potions and a fake mermaid tail. I was committed, okay?
I'm a 2003 baby in case anyone was wondering.
I have a few hobbies including: art (drawing, learning digital art and painting), music (listening and singing), being in nature, collecting random things in the woods (bonez), watching TV, social media (?), driving around, shopping (rETAIL THERAPY), fashion/makeup/hair, reading (occasionally), and of course writing.
Gator Loki is superior (I love u gator loki šŸ˜¤)
Single since 2003 šŸ¤žšŸ»(someone PLZ end my suffering (jk)).
I'm the bitch that barks at people who make me šŸŒŒuncomfyšŸŒŒ.
I will be your partner in crime if asked. (Also will be your bestie)
My sense of humor is horrifyingly unfunny.
Wanna lie under the stars and watch marvel movies on a projector screen šŸŒŸoutsidešŸŒŸ?
I'm horribly shy and introverted in person.
Don't worry, I'll get on your nerves by asking if I'm annoying and saying sorry every five seconds.
People say I give good advice šŸ¤·šŸ»?
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So I think that's all. I may add more. Can you tell I'm a chaotic writer?
If you want to follow me on other platforms here are my usernames:
tiktok: aster2305
instagram: aster.leee
(those are the only two I use frequently but if you don't feel comfy adding me on either, you can always pm me here and I'll be glad to talk!)
I love all of you dudes that support my writing and I hope you're day is fantastic! šŸ¤
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women-only Ā· 5 years ago
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I'm sorry it came out really long I'm gonna send it by pieces we humans are split into these categoriesĀ Ā Ā Ā Ā  Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā  M: maleĀ Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā andĀ Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā  F:Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā  female these categories have different identites: M: can be man (gc or gnc) , diasphoric man, diasphoric man who had transitioned (trans women) F: can be woman (gc or gnc) , diasphoric woman, diasphoric woman who had transitioned (trans men). I'll send the rest
(other messages are under the keep reading)
now about sexualities: if someone is attracted to opposite category (regalredess of identity) : heterosexual someone attracted to people within the same category (regardless of identity) homosexuality Ā  Ā  Ā if it's within category M :gay Ā  Ā  Ā if it's within category F: lesbian *someone attracted to both categories (regardless of identity) : bisexual.
ps. some hot takes. *pansexuality is bisexuality with extra steps you're not special you're just pretentious *if you're NOT sexually attracted to any category but have romantic feelings you're ace (so just replace sexuality with romantic suffix in identities that fits you) *if you're ace and HETERO romantic you're not part of the LGBT cause you don't face any oppression for "not wanting to fuck but occasionally falling in love" if you do it's more likely because of your sex.
if you're ace and HETERO romantic you're not part of the LGBT cause you don't face any oppression for "not wanting to fuck but occasionally falling in love" if you do it's more likely because of your sex. example: that ace woman who was killed by her bf because sadly male entitlement to women's bodies is a thing. *ace homo/bi romantic people don't need the A since they're already in the L/G/B (and i read somewhere that it used to mean Ally
* q**r is a slur and explains nothing about you, having it in the LGBT acronym adds nothing (and I'm pretty sure the Q was meant to mean Questioning) also you never see someone refer to a black historical figure as "n***** icon" so why does the expression "q**** icon" exist to describe people who probably heard it as an insult their whole life till the day they died.
hey this is the anon who posted multiple times I'm trying to finish my thread since Tumblr only allows 5 anon asks per hour and i don't feel comfortable with public . . . reclaiming a slur means other people can't even pronounce it that's why lesbian don't say f*g and gay men can't say d*ke. if you wanna use it on yourself good but don't normalize people outside of the lgbt using it so freely and casually and if someone from the LGBT doesn't like you using it on them they're more than valid.
*if you having sex with your s/o can make human babies you're not homo anything. *if you're in a heterosexual relationship but both of you are bi you're part of the LGBT as individuals not a couple. and that's ok *bisexuals don't stop being bisexuals if they're in het or homo relationship. *gay is not an umbrella term. *puberty blockers = bad *transitioning kids = child abuse *doctors who see dysphoric people as a cash grab are scum *being non binary doesn't make any sense just say you're gnc
* I don't know much about intersex but I'm pretty sure it's just used by people to push their agendas and people rarely care like they should be about intersex people the T used to mean transvestite not Trangender .... and "straight" Ts are already either the L or G and if they're heterosexual Ts then don't face oppression because of sexuality per say so the T doesn't really fit now nowadays especially since people are more open to ppl wearing unconventional clothes
and the T of now compared to the rest of the letters doesn't fit (the first are about sexuality and the last is about expression) the T before belonged because it challenged the norms (and most of people from it belong to 2 letters in the LGBT) but since those norms have changed. *the T now should stand on its own as a movement (and occasionally intertwine with the LBG when it fits)
people deny sex based oppression but i find it ironic that in the T the only voices you hear are trans women especially "transbians" aka straight males and trans men are pushed to the side and degraded on a sex based level (example threats f**ced impregnation and stuff) and their only achievements that reach the news are pregnancy. trans women are given positions women position but trans men get nothing.
continued... people saying drop the T doesn't mean stop caring about trans people altogether or deny them basic human rights. but you can't sit around and let someone hijack your movement guilty trip you into sleeping with them. make you feel like a bigot for who you're sexually attracted to, work on erasing you. like you don't see white people representing the BLM (and they shouldn't) they can only support it as allies....
Segway back to pansexuality I said it somewhere else but here we go pan works in fictional settings especially sci-fi or fantasy let me explain by giving an example: SpongeBob aka the first time i heard about the term pan spongebob is a fucking taking sponge and interacts with different species within that universe like obviously his sexuality isn't gonna be limited to the human sex binary (some cartoons do but you get what i mean)....
same goes for loki who is pan and gender bending like duh the fucker not only ISN'T human he can switch to any entity, object, animal and shit the lore of marvel has living robots mutants gods animals spirits, pretty sure he gave birth to a horse once having someone attracted to personality makes sense then end of rant i just wanna say thanks for letting me post here and sorry for posting so much it ended up being 4.5k letters oof p.s if any ask was submitted publicly please make them anonymous
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everything you said is absolutely true and you summed it all up well. it creeps me out when people label fictional characters as pan or ace or trans because not only is pan and ace not a real fucking thing, neither are those characters. idk its just creepy.Ā 
thank you for taking the time to write this ll out and send it over to me. im happy to read anything else you have to say :) sorry i dont have much to say about all this i dont have the ability right now to think critically.Ā 
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