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justfangirlthingies · 4 years ago

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Rewrite The Stars (Draco Malfoy)

Another songfic! This one's based on "Rewrite The Stars" by Zac Efron and Zendaya. You'll definitely know this song if you've seen the greatest showman

Word count: 1804 words

Warnings: angst, I used the word 'hell' once does that count as swearing?, I think that's it? please lmk if I missed something

The reader is a muggle in this

There's a lot of soft Draco

Grey eyes observed as you skillfully balanced your shopping bags, focus set on cramming around for your keys. "AHA! Got you now!" you exclaimed as your fingertips made contact with the cool metal and the sound of keys rattling filled the air. As soon as you had fished them out of your bag you took notice of the feeling that someone was watching you. Your gaze left your hands in order to look for the source of the unnerving feeling that had come over you. (E/c) eyes widened when they landed on the pale boy. "(Y/n)." He paused for a second so he could approach you. The eye contact he held was intimidating "We need to talk." At this you just gave a short nod and walked past him to unlock your door, the blonde following close behind you.

"You know I want you" he said.

Your eyes went wide after hearing his statement "Draco-" "No. I'm not done, just hear me out please?" the desperation in his eyes was something you were not used to, so you folded your arms, a sigh escaping your lips as you spoke "go on then."

You already had an idea where this was going and when he proceeded to speak, your theory was confirmed. "It's not a secret I try to hide. I know you want me" Draco felt some form of relief, like a heavy weight was lifted off his shoulders with every word that left his mouth as he finally came clean to the muggle girl.

They had had similar conversations before, but there had always been doubts holding the pair back from actually confessing their feelings. "So don't keep saying our hands are tied." you stop him right then and there as you claim "it's not in the cards and fate is pulling you miles away and out of reach from me. There's no chance for us Draco...we're far too different from one another"

The blonde inspected you as he considered stopping the conversation, but he couldn't. Not now. Not now when he had finally found the courage to pour out his heart's desires to you. The longings he had been putting aside in fear you'd leave if you knew. It was ridiculous really. How he had no problems to tell you about his magical heritage or his family quarrels. Hell, he even told you about the task he'd have to accomplish soon, even though that one did take a bit of persuasion from your side. Revealing his feelings for you however, seemed nearly impossible. No, he couldn't stop now. He had to continue.

So the boy went on with his attempts of persuasion, all the while breaking your heart because in your opinion those attempts were, quite frankly, fruitless, seeing as how the two of you would have zero chances out there in the open. "But you're here in my heart. So who can stop me if I decide that you're my destiny?" You wanted to interrupt him, yet he just carried on with his little speech.

Little did you know, what he was about to ask you next would have tears pooling in your eyes. "What if we rewrite the stars? Say you were made to be mine" Draco took a step towards you and uncrossed your arms. Your glassy (e/c) eyes meet his silver stare as he relentlessly kept spilling his heart's content out for you. "Nothing could keep us apart" Slender fingers caressed from your shoulders along your arms until he reached your hands, intertwining them. You could feel the cool metal of his rings make contact with your skin as he held your hands in a gentle grasp all the while maintaining eye contact. "(Y/n) you'd be the one I was meant to find. It's up to you, and it's up to me. No one can say what we get to be" As your ears picked up and registered what he meant, your lip started quivering, the tears that had been pricking your eyes finally fell, though you still tried to hold them back. Nevertheless, the blonde's eyes were still filled with determination "So why don't we rewrite the stars? Maybe the world could be ours tonight" The last word came out as a whisper.

Then there was silence. He had given you time to think about all the things that he had laid before you in the previous minutes. Oh how you would've loved to just agree and jump into his arms. But one of you had to be realistic. The perfect future you had envisioned with the pale boy was simply a fantasy. Nothing more and nothing less. It was entirely impossible, you couldn't be with him no matter what your heart told you.

"You think it's easy. You think I don't want to run to you" It was finally your turn to respond and even though it would hurt you both, you'd have to break his heart and yours would also shatter in the process. "But there are mountains and there are doors that we can't walk through" You couldn't give in the way you wanted to. Not with what he told you about his family, you already knew his parents wouldn't accept you if you weren't what wizards and witches call a 'pureblood'. So, even if you had possessed magic, you'd be what they call a 'muggleborn'. Nothing close to a pureblood.

"I know you're wondering why, but after all you told me you could be disowned for simply interacting with me" your voice cracked and you pulled your hands from his. No matter how much you wanted to, you couldn't give in. "Because we're able to be just you and me within these walls, but when we go outside you're going to wake up and see that it was hopeless after all" Finally, you allowed your tears to flow freely "No one can rewrite the stars. How can you say you'll be mine? When you know it's just an empty promise. I'm just some muggle and you're a well-known wizard. Please Draco can't you see? It's never going to work out. You'll find someone better someday" You pleaded. "Everything keeps us apart. And I'm not the one you were meant to find. It's not up to you. It's not up to me" But was it really not up to the two of you? A question on the tip of your tongue was igniting hope. "Draco tell me, when everyone tells us what we can be, how can we rewrite the stars?" The young Malfoy's eyes lit up when you asked him. Had his words finally gotten through to you? A noise left your throat, quiet, desperate and fragile. Had you intended for him to hear it? He didn't know. But hear he did. He heard the whimpers and whispers emitting from you as well as the sentence they formed "Say that the world can be ours. Tonight"

It was then and there that you gave in and just crashed right into his chest. Tears staining his dress shirt as he held you steadily, his lips pressed against the top of your head. "All I want is to fly with you" you murmured against his chest, voice muffled by the fabric of his clothes. A chuckle resonated in Draco's chest as he tilted your chin upwards with his finger, so you were looking straight at him. His thumb wiping the leftover tears as a small smile made its way to his face. He leaned in closer to your face to the point where his lips were ghosting just above yours "All I want is to fall with you. So just give me all of you" He breathed against the soft skin of your lips, hovering there for a moment before you closed the gap completely. Your lips fit together perfectly, like two pieces of a puzzle. Both of you pouring everything you felt into the kiss. Your hands soon found their place in his soft platinum hair and from one moment to another he had you pressed up against a wall, how or when that happened you didn't really know, nor did you care for it much. After pulling apart you bit your lower lip while observing him. His breaths had gotten more rapid, blonde-white hair disheveled, a pair of swollen lips parted slightly, cheeks tinted in a rosy tone and dilated pupils in pools of silver admired you.

A sad expression decorated your features when your concerns came back to you. Of course he noticed your expression, a worried and irritated one overcoming his own features in the blink of an eye. "What is it love?" he questioned, an eyebrow arched in confusion. Your eyes met once more when you informed him of your fears "It feels impossible" you whispered. A soft grin tucked at the corners of your lover's lips after his hearing picked up on your words, one hand came up to cup your cheek and caress it with his thumb, while the other brushed a strand of your (h/c) hair out of your face and tucked it behind your ear "it's not impossible" Foreheads now pressed together with your arms looped around the back of his neck, you closed your eyes and exhaled "Is it impossible? Say that it's possible" "It's very possible darling" he murmured, displaying a smirk before connecting your lips again.

How do we rewrite the stars? Say you were made to be mine?

Pure bliss is what you felt when you were with him. Nothing can keep us apart

The two of you together. Reunited. 'Cause you are the one I was meant to find

After all, this was your life. It's up to you and it's up to me

It was your decision to make, not one for society. No one can say what we get to be

And why don't we rewrite the stars?

Draco Malfoy and (Y/n) (L/n), an invincible combination. Changing the world to be ours

▪︎

The next morning you awoke in your bed, a strong arm which was draped loosely over your waist, held you within close proximity to his chest. His scent and the warmth against your back invaded all your senses. Slowly and carefully, you turned in his arms and admired his peacefully sleeping form. One of your hands lightly caressed his cheek as a small, bright smile made its way to your face. You know I want you It's not a secret I try to hide

And for a few moments you really thought it was possible. You had inched closer to his sleeping figure, threading your fingers through his tossed, platinum hair, before you pressed a tender kiss to his lips.

"But I can't have you. We're bound to break and my hands are tied"

Taglist: @ateez-star

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ambersky0319 · 5 years ago

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If you're sure about more prompts, then I have another Loceit one since I've been binge reading them non-stop 💙💛 One too many wrong words -Robot, Unfeeling, Doesn't care- and Logan finally breaks down. He has a panic attack, one that no one helps him with, and suddenly he's non-verbal. Its not a choice he makes, it's a stress-induced side effect that he can't fix himself. The others think that it's a choice. He talks to Thomas through something like a notepad. (Part One)

Eventually he has another attack but this time someone helps him through it, but he can’t tell who as he lost his glasses somehow. Afterwards, Deceit starts trying to help. Either by getting the others attention to help them see Logan, or maybe helps him with his work, or helps him be distracted when he gets too stressed. (Part Two: Wow this is long, sorry)

Maybe after months of non-verbal speaking, he falls in love with Deceit. He either finds his voice to tell him or writes it down somewhere for him to find on accident. Deceit reciprocates and tells him that he helped that second time. You can do purposeful unsympathetic Sides or not, that’s your choice. (All done. I hope you like it ❤️)

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I loved writing this and I hope you enjoy reading it!!! This was such a fantastic idea!!

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Warnings: Morally gray/unsympathetic sides (up to interpretation really but leaning heavily towards unsympathetic), panic attacks, Logan angst, overwhelming stress on a character, lmk if I need to add anything else!

Masterpost

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Logan thought that he knew what caused panic attacks. He thought he knew how to stop them, or at least make them more bearable, too. But he had never actually experienced a panic attack before. All of his methods that had helped the others he discovered through research and helping them find the best way to get through their attacks.

While filming one video, however, things had gone way too far.

Logan admittedly doesn’t remember much of what led up to their dispute. Mostly numerous jabs at him, Logan guessed. But he could feel his chest starting to tighten, and Logan started lashing out a bit more with little thought as insult after insult was spat between him, Roman, and Virgil.

He doesn’t even remember now what had caused the attack. All Logan knew was that he was having one.

Logan sunk out immediately upon realizing that he was panicking, rising up into his room on unsteady legs. He was able to reach his door to lock it when they finally gave out on him and he collapsed, his breaths uneven and short. Logan squeezed his eyes together, leaning against his door and trying desperately to catch his breath.

Any technique he knew to help left his thoughts. He was failing and failing to get his breathing under control as he tucked his legs close to his chest, ducking his head to hide it behind them. He couldn’t feel anything yet he could feel everything, everything was louder too, but it was all a buzz. He didn’t know what to do. What could he do? Make sure no one saw him like this.

They would hate him, wouldn’t they? Maybe think he was faking, or copying Virgil. Because Logan didn’t feel emotions, right? How could Logic ever feel anything? Logic didn’t feel things. Logic provided information, sound reasoning, and a way to ground oneself. Logic didn’t have emotion tied to it. Logic never did.

So why was Logan unable to just pull himself out of this?

He stayed there, curled up by the door for what felt like hundreds of hours. According to the clock, though, it had been only about thirty-five minutes. Logan took deep breaths, his throat felt sore and his eyes burned as he wiped away tears. He didn’t have the energy to go out and see if they were still recording, or if everyone had just decided to end the shoot early. He could hear Patton and Roman bantering cheerfully from upstairs, and he sighed shakily.

Logan forced himself away from the door. His head felt as though it were throbbing, had he hit it on accident? He might’ve. He walked on legs that felt like jello and he felt physically exhausted. So, Logan did the only thing he thought he could manage and even tolerate.

He climbed into bed and fell into a restless sleep.

Logan flinched as someone knocked far too loudly on his door. He tried to respond, about to snap at whoever for waking him up. But nothing came out other than a hoarse, unintelligible sound. Logan frowned, rubbing his eyes roughly and grabbing his glasses. Maybe this was just a side effect of him having a panic attack. He knew Roman sometimes went nonverbal after particularly bad ones himself. He hoped it was temporary, much like the princely side.

Logan was almost completely out of bed when the person just walked away, and Logan frowned as he listened to their footsteps fade down the hall. He walked to the door and opened it, looking out and grimacing at how blinding everything was. But no one was there.

A note and what he assumed was dinner was at the foot of his door though, so he picked both up and went back into his room.

The note was from Patton, briefly apologizing for how Roman and Virgil acted but also saying how Logan should apologize too. Logan frowned at that before continuing to read. The rest was just a list of things that still needed to get done for the video, specifically more of Logan’s parts.

Logan set the note aside so he could focus on the leftovers Patton had brought him, opting to worry about the video later.

Logan going nonverbal, however, was not temporary.

No. It lasted far longer than any of the other sides had ever gone. And Logan knew it wasn’t by choice. So many times in the following month did he want to snap at someone or easily defend himself when the others made jokes about him. They hurt, after all. But he would just go ignored.

The others thought Logan had done this voluntarily. He didn’t tell them about the panic attack out of fear of being judged or ridiculed(he knew he was jumping to conclusions but he couldn’t stop thinking of all the things that could go wrong). So he endured it, turning to pen and paper to communicate. It was easier that way.

Logan stopped trying to defend himself altogether. And once that happened, the work started piling up. Suddenly, Logan was tasked with editing scripts, scheduling, keeping Thomas on track and not distracted(how he was supposed to do that when the others kept distracting Thomas themselves he did not know, but the blame was constantly pinned on him anyway), participating in the filming of videos, and editing said videos. All this work that the others just kind of shoved onto him. He couldn’t say no. They just ignored when he would try and write a response, saying he took too long and could’ve already started.

So, Logan had given up on fighting them.

He almost did become the robot he was so often compared to. He almost did stop caring. But then Patton would scold him for not putting enough heart into Thomas’s work, or Roman would say it’s not creative enough, or Virgil would claim it was too risky and he should start over. And Logan just grew more and more frustrated. He wasn’t getting better. He wanted so badly to get better, but he also wanted to stay their friend, he still wanted to have a seat at the metaphorical table.

It wasn’t much of a surprise to Logan when he slipped into another panic attack. It was after Roman had come in for the fifth time claiming Logan hadn’t done well with the most recent script’s edit, and that he should start over. He had ‘thanked’ Logan and called him 'their editing machine’ which just frustrated Logan even more as he was trying to work on a good time for Thomas to go to the doctors.

His door slammed closed, and Logan could feel the tightness in his chest and he found it hard to swallow. He pushed himself from his desk and stumbled slightly out of his chair to get to the base of his bed. He intended to sit on it but ended up collapsing just before he reached it. Logan didn’t care as he curled up, covering his mouth.

I’ll be alright. This is fine. I can do this. He thought. After this is over I can get back to work. I can finish that fucking script finally.

But what if Roman came in again? What if Patton or Virgil found something wrong with it instead? What if they had other ideas and asked Logan to somehow put them in, forcing Logan to rewrite the script? What if he just passes out here and the others thought he was wasting time? What if they got mad at him over this?

He choked out a sob and it hurt to even breathe, he wished he couldn’t, wished that when having a panic attack he could just stop.

Something had fallen beside Logan, or maybe had moved there itself? Logan couldn’t tell. He couldn’t feel his glasses on his face. Had he taken them off? But the thing moved again, and Logan couldn’t make them out through his tears or his terrible eyesight.

He did make out their voice, though.

“-an. I want you to do as I say, okay? It’s going to help you, I promise. You can hear me, right?”

Logan tried to follow the voice, keep up with it, and tried to let that be the only thing he focused on. He nodded slightly, inhaling sharply. The side made some sort of relieved noise.

They started to guide Logan through an exercise to help ground him, first helping with his breathing and then asking various yes or no questions. Logan would tap their hand in certain patterns and having to remember them helped him calm down as the other side asked him things in a soft and soothing voice.

Eventually, Logan had just passed out, his thoughts a low buzz as the exhaustion once again forced him asleep. When Logan woke up, his glasses we’re on the nightstand with a glass of water and a note saying he hoped Logan would feel better after some rest. The side hadn’t left any name, though.

Logan didn’t get to work immediately, he tried to unwind a bit so he didn’t have another panic attack so soon. He grabbed one of his favorite books, a greek mythology book from when Thomas was younger, and he piled most of his pillows and blankets into one corner of his bed so he could curl up and read comfortably. It was late, around 12 am (how long he’d been out he didn’t know, he found that he didn’t really care) and so Logan didn’t fear any of the others storming in to shove more work onto him or to scold him for not using his time wisely.

The next few days went by just the same as before. Except now, much to almost everyone’s displeasure(Logan really didn’t mind), Deceit was hanging around. He didn’t say why exactly but demanded to partake more in videos. The arc of the series was heading in a direction where Deceit was needed anyway, so the others couldn’t exactly argue against it.

Logan was pretty happy Deceit was around more now. Because Deceit made an effort to include Logan in discussions. When the others tried to brush Logan off, he’d momentarily silence them so Logan could share his own thoughts in videos, which the others had to at least evaluate.

One day Deceit knocked on Logan’s door before opening it a bit, poking his head in and when Logan smiled at him slightly, he took that as a sign he was allowed inside. Another thing Logan liked about Deceit- Deceit was patient and would wait for Logan to respond and didn’t just barge inside his room whenever he felt like it.

Logan had returned to the third video he was editing, his fingers hurt a bit from staying in the same position for almost days now but he was so close to happy done by their release dates. Then maybe Patton would get off his back for being unable to keep Thomas motivated and the fans happy.

Deceit settled himself on the edge of Logan’s bed. “What might our fair nerd be working on tonight?” Deceit asked, watching Logan over his shoulder. Logan glanced up at a list pinned to the shelf next to his computer and then pointed to it. Deceit squinted to read it better, and Logan didn’t see him frown.

He could hear the frown in his voice though. “You’re editing the season finale for Sanders Sides yourself?” Logan shrugged, and Deceit continued to read the list. There were still two more things on the list that would take a long time to finish, a few hours each at least. It was almost dinner.

“Do you want me to take on these last two scripts for you?”

Logan frowned, stopping where he was on the video and turning to look at Deceit, a puzzled expression on his face. “You’ve been working all day, Lo. It’s the least that I can do.”

Logan bit his lip. He grabbed his notepad and pen and quickly wrote something before handing it to Deceit.

Are you sure?

Deceit smiled gently and nodded. “Certainly.”

Logan relaxed slightly, though still looked hesitant as he grabbed the two scripts that still needed editing and passed them to the deceitful side. Deceit summoned his own laptop and got to work without any complaints.

Logan obviously finished editing the video before Deceit was even halfway done with editing his first script. He reached to take the second one instead, but Deceit grabbed his wrist gently and shook his head.

“Why don’t you get some dinner, and then maybe watch a documentary or something? You’ve done some great work already today and deserve to relax a bit.”

Logan almost fought against Deceit’s words, but his head hurt from listening to the loud voices of the others all day and his eyes stung from the light of the computer. Deceit watched as Logan silently agreed and left to go get some pizza from downstairs.

This went on for a long time. And Logan found himself enjoying the deceitful side’s company. He loved listening to Deceit talk about psychology or the different loopholes you could use in court, and Logan found himself becoming less and less stressed when Deceit was around. They split up the work the others pushed onto Logan and not only got done faster but also induced less stress on either of them.

Even when things did become too much for Logan, though, Deceit was always there, holding one of Logan’s favorite movies or a new documentary or offering a massage. Sometimes Deceit would read to Logan as Logan tried some low-stress activities like drawing.

It had been roughly half a year since Deceit started spending so much time with him. And that’s when it clicked with Logan concerning his new and originally annoying emotions.

He really, really liked Deceit.

However, right now was not the time to have this realization. Not when Deceit had his arms around Logan, holding him close as they rewatched Round Planet for the twentieth time. Logan tried not to ruin the calm atmosphere by shifting at all, though he seemed to have screwed that up because Deceit pulled away from him slightly.

“Lo, you alright?”

Logan nodded on instinct and he could practically see Deceit’s frown without even turning around.

“Logan…”

Logan bit his lip before sighing slightly and turning in Deceit’s arms. Deceit’s arms dropped from his middle to settle at Logan’s waist, and Logan couldn’t help but think about how perfect Deceit’s hands felt there.

God, I’m pathetic.

Deceit tilted his head at Logan before reaching for the logical side’s notepad and pen, passing it to him and pairing their show. “What’s on your mind?”

Logan accepted both of the objects held out to him. He glanced from the notepad to Deceit’s monochromatic eyes then back to the pad, worrying at his bottom lip slightly. Deceit just waited quietly, letting Logan take his time to think through what he wanted to write.

Logan wrote something down multiple times, before borrowing his brow and shaking his head, tearing the paper and coupling it before tossing it to the trash can. It wasn’t until the fourth note did he finally hand Deceit the notepad, his cheeks and ears flushed a dark red.

I think I might really, really like you.

Deceit didn’t dare get his hopes up, but he could definitely feel his heart skip a few beats as he thought of the implications of Logan’s words.

“Just so I don’t misinterpret,” Deceit began, looking up from the paper in his hand. “You mean romantically, right? You like me romantically?”

Logan groaned slightly, hiding his face in his hands as he only grew darker. Deceit could imagine him saying to shut up or possibly calling it stupid. But he nodded behind his hands.

Deceit smiled brightly, it still felt foreign to him to smile like this and was a rare sight only Logan ever got to see. Deceit gently pried Logan’s hands away from his face and used another one of his hands to tilt Logan’s chin up.

“I like you too, Logan. I like you a lot.”

Logan smiled almost shyly as he shuffled closer to Deceit and pulled him into a proper hug, burying his warm face against the scales on Deceit’s neck. Deceit laughed, soft and fond, as he held Logan close again and he pressed the gentlest of kisses to Logan’s temple.

A few minutes passed by like that, holding one another close in comfortable silence. But then Deceit broke it with a whisper.

“I have something to tell you, Lo.”

Logan pulled his head from Deceit’s neck, tilting his head.

“You remember your second panic attack, the one you said you don’t know who helped you?”

Logan thought back to it before nodding. In reality, he didn’t remember much about it.

“I was the one who helped.” Deceit rubbed the back of his neck slightly. He smiled softly at Logan as Logan processed what he was saying.

Logan’s expression changed from mild concern to delight in seconds though, and he pulled Deceit closer, almost connecting their lips without thinking. But then he froze, drawing back slightly and he held Deceit’s gaze.

Deceit laughed slightly, breath fanning over Logan’s face before nodding and leaning closer himself, but he let Logan control the kiss. It was gentle as Logan cupped Deceit’s cheeks, Deceit’s multiple arms snaking around Logan’s waist and middle to hold him as close as possible.

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lucacangettathisass · 5 years ago

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how the light gets in (ch. 8)

SUMMARY: After your home is ransacked by a group of strange men, you and your cousin are taken in by a group of outlaws. And that’s when the trouble really starts.

PAIRINGS: John Marston x Fem!Reader, Arthur Morgan x Fem!Reader

ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR, FIVE, SIX, SEVEN

TAGGING: @mountainhymn if you would like to be added to the tag list just lmk!

NOTES: so sorry for the slow update! ive been doing some full on hours at work (my manager literally told me that im doing full time hours despite being part time lmao rip) so that’s been leaving me a little drained lmao but hey at least we got there!

more mentions of low self esteem, those are gonna be a lot more prevalent from here on out actually.

on another note, i’ve been wondering if i should rewrite this as an oc fic rather than a reader one. thoughts? i might not even do it, but im curious to hear what you guys think.

anyways, hope you all enjoy! and dont forget, likes are nice but reblogs are what motivate creators the most!

p.s. pls check out waking up slow by mountainhymn!!!! it is so wonderful im still crying

“Well, it really all started with my momma.” You felt yourself begin to fidget and made an effort to stand completely still. “She got a job working for a wealthy Russian widow, Mrs Zamolodchikova.”

Mr Morgan let out a low whistle. “Now that’s a name.”

You couldn’t help but smile. “A lot of Russian names are like that. As I was saying, she hired my momma to be a maid when I was still very young. Mrs Zamolodchikova treated us very well, we even lived in a little cottage she had on her land.”

Despite all the years that had passed, you still thought of that cottage fondly. It had been small and not impressive by any means, but it had been your home for most of your childhood. You had a lot of good memories of it.

“I...I lost my momma when I was seven.” Even now, twelve years later, it hurt to say. Your mother had been your whole world, everything began and ended with her, and it had never once occurred to you when you were a child, that you would one day have to face the world without her. She loved you too much to do that to you. And then it happened anyway.

You had never experienced a heart break like it before, or since.

“I’m very sorry to hear that.” Mr Matthews said gently.

“It’s alright.” You assured him, trying to speak around the lump that always formed in your throat whenever you thought about losing your mother. “She had been ill for as long as I could remember, it was only a matter of time.”

“I imagine your aunt and uncle took you in?”

“They wanted to, but Mrs Zamolodchikova stepped in. She said that she saw it as her Christian duty to take me in as a ward, and that’s what I became.” It had stunned you at the time to learn that Mrs Zamolodchikova cared for you that much. You would always be grateful for her kindness, it had changed your life. “She had no children of her own, so I think she wanted me to fill that gap.”

“That was very kind of her.” Mr Matthews sounded surprised, and you supposed that it made sense. You couldn’t imagine that he had come across many people willing to take in the child of an employee, particularly among the rich. You certainly had never seen such a thing in your time among them.

You nodded in agreement. “She taught me etiquette and how to behave in upper class circles, and as I got older I became her companion. That was how I met Mr Cornwall.”

A spark appeared in Mr Van Der Linde’s eyes, and you knew that you really had his full interest now. “How did that come about?”

“He was looking for investors in his business, he was just starting out you see, and he needed some capital.”

“So he went to Mrs Zamolodchikova?” Mr Van Der Linde asked. “She must’ve been rather rich.”

“Exceedingly so.” You said. “Her family is very old Russian money, and when she came to America with her husband, her wealth only grew, even after he died. I imagine Mr Cornwall thought that if he could convince her to invest, he would have an easy time of building his empire.”

“Did he?” Mr Van Der Linde’s eyes sparkled with a kind of devious curiosity, the kind most often found in children. “Convince her to invest that is.”

“I’m afraid not. Mrs Zamolodchikova found him rather...disagreeable.” A part of you still cringed on the inside just thinking about that meeting. It had started off well, and Mr Cornwall had certainly been polite enough, but once his true character came out, it all started to go downhill rather rapidly.

“In what way?”

You hesitated slightly. “Well, I mean, one doesn’t wish to disparage others when they don’t have the opportunity to defend themselves.”

A chuckle came from Mr Van Der Linde, and you even saw a corner of Mr Morgan’s mouth twitch.

“We just want your honest opinion, that’s all.” Mr Matthews assured you. “No need to be disparaging.”

You paused, trying to think of the right way to phrase it. “Mr Cornwall...well, Mrs Zamolodchikova and I found him to be rather...brusque and arrogant. When Mrs Zamolodchikova turned down his request, he got rather upset and he seemed to take it as a personal affront.”

“She must’ve grown to regret that.” Mr Van Der Linde mused.

“Not at all. Mrs Zamolodchikova was happy for him of course, but she was also happy she rejected him. She said she couldn’t imagine being in business with someone so...tasteless.”

“Tasteless in what way?” Mr Matthews asked.

“Well he was...very new money.” When you saw the looks of confusion on the mens’ faces, you tried to think of a better way to phrase it. “He was something of a show off, and a little gaudy. He wore a lot of gold, I imagine to try and impress, but it came off as vain and rather insecure. Mrs Zamolodchikova was very critical of that kind of thing, and when she saw how self aggrandizing he became after his success, she grew to dislike him even more.”

Mr Van Der Linde nodded slowly, and you could almost see the wheels turning in his head. “It sounds like you’ve lead a rather interesting life.”

“I suppose you could say that.” Your eyes roamed over the two older men again. “I imagine that wasn’t the kind of information you wanted, my apologies Mr Van Der Linde.”

Despite your fears, the black haired man smiled and waved a hand. “It’s fine Miss [Last name]. I was just curious, that’s all. Javier, why don’t you walk her back to where she’s staying?”

“Sure thing boss.”

You turned to leave with Mr Escuella, but you hesitated just as he put a hand on the door knob. “Wait.” All eyes were back on you, and you felt yourself flush, but you felt that you needed to get this out. “I just-I just wanted to add that Mr Cornwall is a very powerful man, and in my opinion, and in the opinion of mutual acquaintances that he and I share, he is lead more by pride and ego than wisdom. He doesn’t take insults lightly and can be rather harsh.” You were very careful and deliberate with your words, not wanting to seem like you knew better, but still wanting to convey your feelings of apprehension.

Mr Van Der Linde raised an eyebrow, and you got the feeling that he understood what you were trying to say. “Duly noted Miss.”

You nodded, and turned back to Mr Escuella, this time actually following him outside.

“You must’ve lived a pretty good life for a while.”

You shrugged and felt yourself blush heavily. “I suppose.” It always somewhat embarrassed you, knowing how different your life had been from other people, especially those who were born into the same class as yourself. “I honestly just think I got lucky.” You looked down at your feet. “Don’t feel so lucky now though.”

A heavy silence hung between you two, and you had to bite the inside of your cheeks to stop yourself from crying.

“Sorry.” You said softly. “I’m sure you don’t want to hear about my woes.”

“It’s ok.” Mr Escuella assured you, his voice kind again. “Considering everything you’ve been through, I’d say you have a right to let your feelings out.”

You looked at Mr Escuella in surprise. You hadn’t really thought about it like that. “You’re very kind.” You said sincerely. “Sadie might not think so but I certainly do.”

That brought a bright smile to Mr Escuella’s face, which made you smile in turn. You always enjoyed making people smile, it made you feel good, and you felt that it proved that you were useful and worth something for once.

“You’re a sweet kid.” Mr Escuella’s eyes were shining, although you couldn’t hazard a guess as to why. “Don’t let anyone beat that out of you, ok?”

“I-Ok.” You weren’t sure how else you should respond, being so unused to compliments from strangers. You watched as he held the door to the house with the other women open. “Are you not coming in?”

“Nah.” He smiled. “You stay warm ok?”

“Of course, and you as well Mr Escuella.” You went inside, and no sooner was the door closed that you were practically swarmed by Miss Jones, Miss Gaskill, and Miss Jackson.

“What did they want?”

“You weren’t gone for very long, did everything go alright?”

“Are you allowed to say?”

You felt yourself flush as you tried to keep track of who was asking which question. “It was nothing special.” You said. “They just wanted to know how I knew Mr Cornwall.”

Of course they all also wanted to know, and so you told them what you had told Mr Van Der Linde, Mr Matthews, Mr Morgan, and Mr Escuella-omitting your warning at the end.

Much like the men, they were stunned to hear your story.

“So you grew up pretty well to do.” Miss Jones said, in a tone that sounded impressed and envious.

“I-Well, yes, I suppose.” The embarrassment from earlier had returned. “I was extremely privileged.”

“What was it like?” Miss Gaskill asked, sounding wistful. “Being in that world?”

You paused, trying to think of a good way to describe it.

“When I was a little girl, it was dazzling.” You confessed. “All those men and women in their finery...it looked like an entirely different world. Like a fairy tale.”

“Oh yeah?” Miss Jackson raised a brow. “Meet any prince charmings?”

You laughed. “I met some well to do gentlemen if that’s what you mean.”

“I think she means suitors.” Miss Gaskill said with a giggle, and an eager look on her face. “Well, did you?”

“Oh!” A scorching heat unlike any of the others from before overcame you, and you felt your throat dry up. “I-Well-no.” You stammered, looking askance out of embarrassment.

“Really?”

You looked up and saw Miss Roberts looking at you with surprise. “You mean none of them tried to…” She trailed off, leaving you to fill in the blank.

“Not at all.” You said, your flush worsening. “After all, I was just a maid’s daughter.”

And therein lies the rub.

No matter how much you learned or how you dressed or how you behaved, everyone knew that you were just the daughter of a maid who Mrs Zamolodchikova had taken pity on. Most of them had been polite enough, but that boundary had always been there, and always would be. You had grown accustomed to it, the way one would grow accustomed to a permanent limp. And it left you with what you imagined would be the same level of alienation. It was one of the many unfortunate side effects of being born as yourself, and one you had learned how to deal and navigate the world with.

But it would always be a fairy tale to you. Beautiful, grand, never within your reach no matter how well you knew it. And you would always be that little girl that chased after it with every breath in her chest.

#arthur morgan x reader #john marston x reader #rdr 2 #red dead 2 #red dead fic #fic: how the light gets in

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acadeamic · 6 years ago

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Hi, una! (What a great name btw!!) I was looking through your posts and (I hope this isn't creepy lol sorry!) I noticed you're taking AP bio - I'm taking that class too! I'm like, super not doing well in that class and I was wondering if you had any advice/tips/resources on how you study for ap bio. Sorry if this comes across as stalkerish lol I'm just really struggling in that class rn. Thanks so much! 💛

hi anon!

first off, thank you so much!! you are SO sweet:') dw, it's not creepy at all, i don't mind a bit! it's why that info is there, hehe

as for AP bio, i can't say it's my BEST class, but i do have some tips & methods for both studying & exam-taking, which is how i'm going to split my answer here!

for general studying

focus on big ideas! my teacher often stressed which things the exam prioritized, and told us which things always showed up on the exam vs. what you only need to know a little bit of. as a general rule, i'd say make sure you know the basic concepts, even if you can't remember specific things.

don't rely too heavily on the textbook. there's a lot of information in there, which can be hard to absorb. not all that information is essential, either. if you have access to it, i would use the princeton review or the 5 steps to a 5 books. they're a lot more compact, succinct, and easier to study from.

find good ways to remember things! my teacher sometimes made these semi-elaborate stories that would help us conceptualize or remember particular processes. for example: the action-potential graph and process was given to us as a potassium party, with the sodium-potassium pump being the bouncer that only let in potassium up until a certain voltage, and so on. it's a bit simplistic, but i swear it works! another thing she did was have us make cutouts to explain the DNA to RNA process, so that we could act it out with the paper shapes. you may want to ask your teacher or someone who knows about bio to share one of these methods if they have one, or search it up online as something like "easy ways to remember [xyz]".

some things you really will just have to memorize. for example: the types of reproducive isolation. for me, what works best is note-taking and flashcards. i like to write things repeatedly until they stick, with intervals in between to see how much i can name & describe at the top of my head. there are other ways to go about plain memorization, but this is what works for me and it's nice to be able to look back at what i've written before tests to study!

albert.io has TONS of AP bio MCQs and FRQs. i would definitely take advantage of this resource if you can. the quantity of questions can be a bit overwhelming, so don't start from the beginning but rather where you need the most practice (albert also has practice questions for tons of other courses too, AP or non-AP, so check that out if you're interested!)

personally what i like to do before tests and some exams is, as i kind of said, rewriting my notes. not in as much detail, but key ideas, concepts or diagrams that i feel are important or are things that faded from my mind throughout the year and that i now have to relearn.

ASK FOR HELP! if you have any resource centers at your school, go to them! if what your AP bio teacher is saying doesn't click with you, try someone else with some teaching experience! watching videos and taking notes are great, but sometimes you just need another human being to give you some one-on-one help and explanations for things you're confused about. if you don't have some kind of science help center at your school, i would ask your peers! if there's something you don't understand, most students really don't mind taking 5-10 minutes to run through something with you.

for taking the exam

the AP bio exam is a reading exam as well a science exam. oftentimes you don't have to know exactly what's going on in order to get the right answer. things like drawing graphs in the FRQ or making educated guesses based on word choice in the MCQ are things you can do w/o remembering specific details. figure out what the question is asking first without worrying about the knowledge you have! for example: an MCQ may be about the ethics of a certain medical procedure. one answer choice will probably start with "should.... [xyz]" as opposed to "can/how does [xyz]" and you can immediately rule out the others because of the word choice, which is factual and not theoretical, without knowing exactly what the biology-related information behind the question is.

in the middle of the MCQ, they're going to have a LONG stretch of questions based off of a (series of) graph(s). they do this because it's where you're probably getting tired. you'll be burned out, and you'll want to either rush through it, or you'll be frustrated bc it's so long. LEAVE THOSE. skim through it and answer what you know, but if there's something that currently looks too unappealing, then circle it and come back. once you're done, you can come back to it with a set of fresh eyes and you'll often notice that they were less complicated than you initially thought.

on a similar note, don't be afraid to skip questions to come back to them. if it's taking you more than a few seconds the first time around and/or you have no idea what the question's about, circle it and move on. get as many questions bubbled in before going back and spending a bit more time on the questions you weren't sure about. again, you may be surprised to find that it wasn't too complicated after all. if you're feeling tired of MCQs in general, skip to the math portion at the end! do those, it's a different structure than the MCQ (which is the bulk of the section) and it may clear your mind a little bit.

for the FRQ, again, it's a reading exam. never leave a question unanswered. if you remember vaguely what they're referring to in the question, try and get down a sentence with some key words. the grading rubric doesn't care about eloquency, but about the relevance of the words you put on paper.

some FRQs are meant to be shorter and more detailed than the others. the first two questions are worth 10 points each and take more time to complete. if you're not sure, just draw the graph they ask you to and move on for now. the other questions are worth 3, 4 maybe 5 points? get through those and DON'T spend too much time writing for them. those often only require, like, 2 sentences. save your time!!

i hope this was at least somewhat helpful! good luck, anon, lmk how it goes💓

#ty for asking!!! i truly hope these provide a lil help:-) muah!!#ask #anonymous

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