#living next to an airport core

[kradnie]

can the planes/helicopters go to sleep please c'mon cisza nocna haloooo

[slafastri28]

The Favorite Child - OP81

Summary: The first year of reader and Oscar's relationship, families give the other special treatment when they are around!

Word Count: 3.9k

Warnings: Idk nothing really

Note: Is this loosely based on my life, maybe... yes it is... ENJOY!!

Winter 2023/24

“Mom, Dad, I have someone I want you to meet,” those words were so nerve-racking to you. They knew who Oscar was, you met him during your internship and had become best friends, but things escalated quickly after your boyfriend mistreated you, not trusting you in your work environment as you were surrounded by men your age. You tried to introduce him over the phone to the people you would be spending the most time with, but he refused. Long distance was clearly not meant for the two of you as it resulted in constant fighting and a lack of trust. You two broke up during your Thanksgiving break and you immediately called Oscar. He comforted you, but little did you know he was waiting for you, since the early moments of you two spending time with you he fell hard for you. Now here you were bringing him home from the airport to stay with you for a week before you both left to work again. He naturally walked in through your front door behind you, your parents both smiling.

“You must be the famous Oscar we hear so much about,” your Mom smiled greeting him with a hug, causing your cheeks to flush feeling embarrassed.

“Mr. Piastri,” your Dad greeted him with a handshake, a friendly welcoming one, not very protective over his daughter. The four of you sat down for dinner as your parents began asking about Oscar’s life which was a lot different from yours. It was full of adventures in different cities, countries, and continents, where your last vacation was when you were seventeen. 

“It really is beautiful, once you start putting your shoes up high,” he laughed. He looked so in place at the table across from you talking to your parents. Something in your stomach told you this would be a recurring event. Dinner ended and you showed him where he would be staying for the next week before the two of you traveled to your new shared apartment to start your job. It seemed natural for you to live together, two separate bedrooms which you would both keep clean and orderly, you had similar lifestyles, similar habits, similar everything and you wouldn’t mind living with your best friend. He made himself comfortable in your older brother’s former room, he moved out a long time ago and now it was vacant, and was conveniently right next to yours if he needed anything. The week went on and you showed him all around your hometown, your favorite places to eat, the park where you would play in the snow with your friends, your school, all core parts of who you were. You went shopping gathering last-minute essentials before leaving, it started to feel surreal. You knew deep down you had feelings for Oscar but seeing him in your hometown fitting in perfectly made them even stronger. It was the second to last night you would be staying with your parents. It was late, the two of you were alone in your living room watching a movie when you suddenly felt his head on your shoulder. You couldn’t hide a smile but didn’t say anything you didn’t know what to do. The TV was apparently too loud and startled your Mom out of sleep, because in a few seconds, she was at the top of the stairs asking you to lower it, scaring both you and Oscar out of the position you were in. Once she left his head went immediately back to your shoulder, and you rested your head on top of his. These were normal instances throughout the week, as you would be walking his hand would occasionally brush up against yours, he would look at you longer than he needed to, and he was so attentive in everything you spoke about your town.

“Y/N,” he said softly, you picked your head up as he did the same to look at you. 

“Yes, Oscar?”

“What are we?” That question, that wonderful, stressful question that put the ball in your court, you tried to come up with a response that you hoped wouldn’t scare him off.

“What do you want to be?” You asked, feeling a huge weight lift off your shoulders.

“I- I don’t know,” he replied, your faces moving closer to each other. Your heart was practically beating out of your chest.

“I hope this isn’t too straightforward,” you said before placing a kiss on his lips. When you broke apart he had a big smile on his face.

“I want to be with you Y/N, your boyfriend,” he smiled, kissing you once more.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting to do that,” you sighed with a grin. As your movie came to a close the two of you went upstairs hand in hand before parting to go to your separate rooms. 

You woke up the next morning trying to be as discrete as possible with Oscar around your parents, you two would sit under a blanket and hold hands underneath, or when your parents weren’t looking he would rest his hand on your lower back, it was one more day you figured it would be easy, nope. Your parents quickly caught on, it was a moment when you were alone with your Mom that it got loose.

“You know I know about you and Oscar,” SHE WHAT?! 

“What? How”

“The way he looked at you it was obvious. Relax, your father and I like him very much, I just want to make sure you’re okay it’s barely been a month since…” her voice trailed off.

“I’m fine Mom, I was done with him in October, but I didn’t want to be a jerk and do it over the phone especially while the guys were with me, they all knew, and all encouraged it but I couldn’t do it over the phone,” you explained. 

“So you’re okay,” you nodded. The two of you left the next morning driving the hour to your new apartment. You two began unpacking the boxes that were waiting for you, you caught him looking at you as a distraction.

“So my parents know,” you blurted out.

“Uh-huh, and I thought we were going to wait a little to tell them as per your request,” he said with a hand on his hip.

“My mom figured it out, you made it REALLY obvious,” you teased.

“I can’t help looking at you, you’re finally mine let me enjoy it,” he said before pecking you on the cheek. You two continued unpacking, building furniture that was delivered, and making your apartment feel like home.

The winter season ended and you would be going into the 2024 Formula 1 season as Oscar’s girlfriend. 

Spring 2024

You took supporting Oscar very seriously. In the time you had while he had winter testing, you purchased any merchandise you could find with his name on it, and things you thought were cute that matched the Mclaren colors. Although you couldn’t travel with him to every race due to your job, you still went to as many as you could sporting his last name. He was always happy to see you after no matter what the outcome was. When you were there he would rush over to you, when you weren’t he would call you from his driver’s room immediately after. It was when you leaked to him your parents would be coming to a race he got an idea. You two were lying in your shared room, leaving the other bedroom to quickly become an office/guest room thinking out loud. 

“You said your parents don’t travel much,” he said.

“Well, no one we know travels as much as you, but no not really, why?” you asked.

“I feel like I should get them something, I don’t know, I travel so often, I feel like it would be nice, and you know make them like me more,” he smiled.

“Please, every time we go to their house Mom acts so much different, Dad texted the one time asking if you were coming for dinner because he smelled ‘the good food’, you're their favorite child,” you laughed. 

“No she doesn’t,” he knew secretly it was true.

“Denial is not something I would pin on you but here you are,” you teased. 

“Well maybe I’m the favorite child because I start bringing back souvenirs,” he said with confidence.

“Mhm okay,” you rolled your eyes playfully, “so what are you going to get them?”

“Your Mom loves tea, right? And your Dad coffee?” You nodded, see he knew these things after not even six months of dating. 

“So I’ll bring back mugs or coasters,” he said, “something useful so they will think of me every time they use it,” he said proudly. 

“Favorite child,” you teased again. He shrugged and kept brainstorming.

“So they are coming to Monaco this weekend, but after that, I’ll be in Canada, perfect, a Canada mug,” he smiled.

“Maybe some maple syrup,” you giggled.

“See you’re in on it, you think they will like it,” he grinned.

“They will love anything coming from you, believe me,” you kissed his cheek, “Good night idea man,” you said rolling to your side and drifting to sleep with a smile. 

The weekend approached, and you met your parents for dinner the night before the race, you were surprised by Oscar meeting you there too, he made no clarification he would be there. He was holding a small bag.

“There’s our boy,” your Dad said patting him on the back as he came and sat next to you.

“Hi Darling,” he kissed your cheek, “hope I’m not encroaching on your family time, I knew you would be here, and I can only be alone for so long the night before,” he smiled.

“Oh please, you could never intrude,” your Mom laughed.

“Favorite child,” you whispered in his ear, it became a running joke every time you saw your parents, your Dad was in on it too.

“Y/N don’t whisper it’s rude,” Your mom looked at you sternly, and your Dad winked. 

“What’s in your bag Osc,” you said changing the topic. 

“Something for you two actually,” he said gesturing at your parents, reaching and placing the bag in front of them. 

“What a nice mug,” your Dad said pulling it out of the bag, it was a Formula One-themed mug with the word Monaco across the top, it had different cars, a map of the track, helmets, and the flag of course. You sat there stunned, thinking this wasn’t starting until next week, but Oscar had mischief.

Your parents continued to thank and praise him for the mug as the weekend continued, and each week that followed with a different mug being sent to your parent's house or hand delivered they became more and more loving towards him as if they weren’t already. Your parents became Oscar’s second parents, they loved having him around. You were invited to stay with them the summer break but declined, you two had your own vacation in mind, where you were sure Oscar would bring a mug back from there. 

Summer Break 2024

Here it was, the moment you would meet Oscar’s family. You two were in the middle of the flight and woke up out of your sound sleep with the fear of meeting his family. That and you always got flight-sick. You rushed to the airplane bathroom, completely disregarding the empty seat next to you. There meeting you in the isle was Oscar,

“Aww again,” he sighed knowing where you were going.

“It will pass, we are almost there anyway,” you sighed trudging to the bathroom. Moments later you were back in your seat, you could see the sun rising out of the window, he took your hand rubbing his thumb gently across the top. 

“You have no reason to be nervous,” he smiled knowing that was also making you sick. Your flight continued into an eventual bumpy landing sending your stomach into orbit. Oscar rested his hand over it as its shield, he knew where you would be going in the airport first. You went to the bathroom and after you finished your boyfriend was no longer standing alone. You recognized the figures, quickly rushing your hands into your pockets waiting for them to notice. Oscar’s eyes moved from his youngest sister’s to yours. You made your way over comfortably, but could still feel your heart pounding in your chest. 

“Everyone,” he announced, “this is Y/N L/N, my best friend, and beautiful girlfriend. " He smiled, resting his hand on your back, urging you to come closer. You hid your nervousness with a smile,

“It’s so nice to meet all of you finally, he’s told me so much,” you could feel the heat of your face flushing away. His mom was first to greet you pulling you into a hug,

“Are you kidding, we’ve heard so much about you,” she laughed. His sisters all greeted you next, looking forward to having a new girl in the house for a couple of weeks, finally, you reached his Dad,

“He looks good, he hasn’t given you any trouble has he,” he smiled.

“No sir,” you laughed, feeling the tension and nerves ease away. The day began with lunch right after the airport pickup, although you could barely get a bite to stay down. 

“Darling where are they,” he said gesturing for you to hand him your bag. His whole family felt horrible. You weren’t feeling well, and they were ready to accommodate plans to suit your needs. The day continued and everyone was catering to your every need, crackers you had it, ginger ale right along with you. 

“You don’t have to-” you were cut off.

“We insist,” his mother said rubbing your shoulder as you made your way into their house. Oscar was getting you unpacked when he found the small bottle of heaven, it always saved you from motion sickness and jet lag when traveling, you must have put it in your suitcase by mistake. There you lay on his bed, looking around at his childhood bedroom, as he did the same when he first arrived at your house. You noticed all the little details, pictures of him growing up, little trophies he had from karting, all the important moments of little Oscar’s life. He joined you handing you the bottle. You took the tablets and rested your head in his lap already feeling a lot better. 

“See, no worries, they love you, favorite child,” he laughed.

“No no you cannot call me that, we haven’t even been here a day,” you shot at him. 

“My mom would tell me to suck it up, and they certainly wouldn’t make me a special meal like they are for you,” he crossed his arms, “so yes I can, I already know.”

“Maybe if I wasn’t sick-”

“Please they love you, and as they get to know you better they will love you even more,” he smiled. 

“So, you told them about me,” you said sitting up and adjusting to look clearly at him. 

“Y/N, my sisters wanted to know every single detail, well everyone in the family always needs to know every single detail,” he groaned.

“And?”

“And the questions would never end, you just wait for dinner tonight, they are going to tell you everything they know about you and more,” you laughed, but he seemed so serious. Dinner approached and he was right, you had a lot to talk about, it was the opposite of your house, where everything was always Oscar, tonight everything was you. 

“So Y/N, Oscar tells us you studied business,” his father began. The next thing you knew many many details of your life had been shared with his family, your hobbies, your interests, …your intentions, a lot of information. You two went to bed early that night feeling tired from the flight, you lay silent in the dark of his room, the only light of the little plug-in near his door. You were both awake staring at the ceiling.

“I’m sorry, were they too much,” he said turning to face you.

“You met my parents, nothing is too much,” you grinned. 

“So they didn’t scare you off,”

“Of course not,” you placed a kiss on his lips. 

“I love you,” he sighed before pressing his lips to yours once more. You two slept peacefully awaiting the weeks ahead of you. 

The trip consisted of Oscar taking you to all his favorite and important places in his life. You two were so in sync, you listened to all his facts and as you experienced all these places he took pictures with you at each one, wanting to remember forever. You two had been stopped in a few places by fans and he was so good about it. You even had some recognition as you were now dating a famous racing driver and were plastered on social media more than you knew. Girls would come up to the two of you squealing with delight asking you personal yet intrusive questions about dating Oscar, he could see your discomfort and would act in ways that would make them even more crazy. He would stare at you lovingly, he would wrap his arms around your waist or over your shoulders, would press little kisses to your cheeks giving you compliments.

“She truly is the best,” he said during one of your fan interactions “I wouldn’t ask for anyone else,” your heart melted. You fell deeper and deeper in love with him this trip, seeing him in his home, now you know how he felt seeing you in your hometown and why he was so infatuated with you. 

As your trip came to a close you didn’t want to leave, it was so amazing. His family became your second family, his home was your home, and you were invited to stay with them at the Australian Grand Prix next year, it was wonderful. You said your goodbyes at the airport before boarding the plane. As you were waiting for take-off, he looked at you smugly, as you had a mixture of joy and sadness on your face.

“Believe me now favorite child?” he teased.

“I think your sisters wished it was me instead of you, I would have killed to play dress up with them when you were all young, you look great in pink by the way,” you laughed, you would miss his family. 

“Okay, it’s only natural for little girls to dress up their older brother, you can’t tell me you didn’t do the same,” 

“I tried, but he’s five years older, he was a teenager when I was at the dress-up age, however in high school he did let me put a pink strip in his and his best friend's hair, so I call that a win,” you smiled talking about your brother. You two grew distant once he moved away, you missed that bond you had when you were little, now he acted as your third parent, you couldn’t talk to him without constant disapproval. You were lost in your thoughts when the plane taking off interrupted them.

Fall 2024

The season carried on, you found yourself longing for Oscar those weekends he was away, and you began to go crazy. Your parents constantly wanted you to visit, or come and surprise you at your apartments on weekends. You knew they meant well but it was starting to become too much. It was different when Oscar wasn’t there, they felt that they could finally give you their real opinions on your lifestyle, and make things the way they wanted in your life. You found yourself crying most nights when he was gone after long days with your parents as sometimes they would make you question your relationship. 

“Does Oscar love you for being like this?” Your mom said to you one weekend, you kicked both your parents out that day and didn’t even bother calling Oscar you were in such a fit of anger and sadness that you were thinking of all the ways you wanted to change yourself in that very moment. Times like this continued and you felt the courage to tell these things to Oscar once again. At first, he didn’t believe you but the more time he spent with them he began to see it. He was always reassuring, but you began to overthink feeling so bad that every weekend he was gone you were upset when he was out scoring points and having a great time.

“Y/N, come with me this weekend,” he finally said one night. That sounded like the best idea to you ever, and work was becoming more of a hybrid position than on-site, it seemed perfect. 

“I would love that,” you sighed. 

“I know there’s only a few races left, but please come with me, I would love to have you there and give you a break from all this stress,” he pressed a kiss to the top of your head. 

“You have a deal,” you smiled.

“So you’re going to tell them right now, you can’t do anything for the next month,” he pointed a stern finger at you. You picked up your phone sending a message to both of them, they seemed fine in their responses but still in those weeks you were traveling they found ways to pick at your travel plans based on your media posts, commenting on what you chose to wear, the meals you two were eating, the late hours you were up, they saw your life start to merge with Oscar’s life, and were concerned. 

Winter 2024-25

You two were spending a week with your parents for the holiday, and eventually, you couldn’t take it anymore and exploded. You scolded your parents in front of Oscar, your boyfriend of almost a year, you thought he would leave you then and there as he had never seen you this upset but he stood in support of you.

“I’m proud of you, you are an adult and they need to see that, I know you don’t think they will change, but they are your parents they mean well, but when you are with me you do not need to doubt yourself at all, I love you for being yourself,” he said as you two sat on the floor in your room. You felt the tears welling up in your eyes once more. You cried all the pain you had been realizing that was influencing your whole life flowed out. He held you to his chest and continued explaining all the thoughts you didn’t realize were influenced by your parents, you felt free. 

“This new year I will help you with all those things darling, I promise you, I am not going anywhere,” he pressed a soft kiss to your lips.

“I love you Oscar Piastri, thank you for making me, me again,” you kissed him once more.

“I love you Y/N L/N, no matter what.”

[thoughtsafterdark]

Hospitals and Airports are the closest modernity can come to reaching the Divine

Have you noticed how some places seem immune to time and social conventions. Like airports, those monoliths of now. Harsh lights burning and souls criss-crossing, tongues melting together into a writhing throng of humanity, a steaming cesspit of consciousness. Steeped in camaraderie yet drenched in isolation. The electric blue arrivals sign glares with neon brightness at 3am, a beacon that signals the end of the road.

Here comes a family of 4 on their way home, crossing through automatic doors into the balmy drizzle of a British night, carrying their loot of straw hats and cheap pendants, tan lines and peeling red lobster skin. A girl no older than 5 limps after her parents and older brother. She lugs her bright pink unicorn behind her and hugs the hood of lilac pyjamas close, rubs the sleep out of her eyes whilst her mother shouts at her to hurry. Soon she’ll tuck herself into bed, in the attic of their ordinary red brick London row house, and she’ll watch the sun peak over the trees in the back garden for the first time in her life. It will become a core memory she will think fondly back on for years to come.

By the first class lounge they hurried past, a man in an impeccable suit (Sheep’s wool, the finest money can buy. The grey colour of the Thames on an early morning) paces back and forth restlessly, briefcase in hand, phone in another. Gold amber eyes like a hawk, close cropped black hair and neatly trimmed beard, square pocket matching the deep tan of his shoes (authentic leather). He is barking orders to someone in Arabic, closing deals, building empires. A bloodied napkin he used to stop a nosebleed earlier falls out of his pocket and winks up at the scaffolding exposed ceiling, high and arching like the dome of a cathedral. He’ll make the sale, then visit the airport bathroom again before hailing a cab to the closest 5 star. In the morning, the maid who took the job to send money to her ailing mother in the Philippines will find his cold stiff body and scream. She’ll call the police and be taken in for questioning. She never signed up for this.

At the hospital coffee shop – two streets and half a lifetime away - a 4th year med students sips on a cortado like her life depends on it. Caffeine surges through her veins, bracing her for the day ahead. Unbelievable how exhausting trying to take up as little space as possible can be. She hates the spiel, it’s the same every time. A new dawn, a new face, a new team. The introductions, the smiling, the grovelling, the headache. She’s 5ft flat with bright orange hair, aspirations for Neurosurgery and a bright pink notebook, so why would they take her seriously.

It’s 8:30, and she’s scheduled for 9am clinic, so she has time for a hurried breakfast today. (Eating any earlier makes her gag). Small mercies. The off-red stained scrubs she nicked from the theatre changing rooms cling to her like a second skin preparing to moult. She squirms in them, the comfort undeniable. They make her feel like she belongs. They make her feel like an imposter.

Her table – she comes here so often; she thinks of it as hers - sits right by large windows overlooking the main entrance and staircase. She sees it all from here, her quiet unassuming throne. The doctors and nurses, physios and pharmacists. Rushing rushing, running, stressing. Wishing, hoping, waiting, waiting, waiting. For the shift to end, for the time for bed. For this rotation to change, for the exam to pass. We’ll go on that holiday next month, next year. When money isn’t tight, when things are more settled.  Before they know it they’ve wished their lives away.

Their patients understand, all too well and all too late. The same father with the IV drip and the metal stand comes down here every morning to see his daughters. They run up to him, he holds them close and beams. But his grip is getting weaker, smile is getting thinner. He doesn’t answer when they ask when he’s coming home. It’s funny what we can’t hear when we’re too busy wearing stethoscopes. Next month she (I) will be stationed on the Psych ward. We’ll have to do it all again, but maybe they’ll hear me this time. Maybe it’ll get easier.

Between them all and among them, if you squint and unfocus your eyes during one of those ungodly hours at the Starbacks across from Boots and WHSmith, leaning against a grey white pillar you might see him.

He is the spectre that haunts airport lounges and waiting rooms alike, the handsome stranger with the black snapback and the beats headphones and the khaki shorts. The one who lives out of a rucksack and wears a travel pillow like a crown. With the kind eyes and crows feet, and honey chestnut curls. He is that boy from your high school everyone liked, with a kind word for everyone; the one with a charmers smile and the charisma to bullshit his way through anything. The one who – when pressed for future plans, would laugh and shake his head, looking down bashfully. “I just want to travel for now, see where it takes me. I want to see the world”, he’d say, eyes twinkling with the possibilities. On someone else, the words would likely merit a telling off, they’d be seen as the paper thin excuse to fuck around and get high. But he seemed so genuine, and his teeth were such a dazzling shade of brilliant white when he smiled, even the strictest careers advisers couldn’t resist.

He lives in those moments, the liminal fabric between worlds that’s so hard to put your finger on. Blink and you’ll miss him in the old alleys of Rome, the spark of his cigarette lighter blending amongst the city lights.

You’ll find him among the most remote hiking trails of the Peloponnese, laughing with local shepherds and German tourists alike, sitting on jutting rocky cliffs and admiring the blue Mediterranean below. If you really pay attention, you’ll see his staff isn’t like the others. Something suspiciously like a pair of snake slithers up and down. You could swear you heard them whispering just now, but when you look again it’s just a wooden stick.

He is the patron of us wanderers and travellers, those of us with movement in our blood and restlessness in our hearts. The ones who beget the will of changing winds and shifting tides. The ones who can’t allow themselves to sit still, lest the dust settle and the coffee get cold. The mortifying ordeal of being seen and known. Or the ones that carry a hearth with them, in the bottom of a suitcase, in the heart of a trailer. The ones who move and weave through the Earth not because they are running but because they are coming home. He dances and jokes with the kids amongst campfires, always welcome, always a pleasure. And if he helps them pick the odd lock, swearing solemnly to secrecy, who are we to judge.

His bronze skin smells of cinnamon and nutmeg, vanilla and cedar and a thousand other spices. He reeks of incense and market stalls, moles and freckles tell the story of trading routes and old silk roads, of cotton shawls from Alexandria and silk from Pekking. His fingers and eyes twinkle with the good-natured mischief of petty thieves and sleight-of-hand magicians, tricksters and circus performers. He picks apples from behind ears, presents jewel necklaces to his lovers.

She sees him now, amongst the patients. He helps an old lady up the steps, pulls a balloon out of his back pocket to the delight of a sick child. She locks eyes with him and they nod at one another She has been seen now, and known. Perhaps she’ll find him again one day, if either stop running.

[authorhjk1]

Interlude: Doctor appointment turns into bunny breeding sessions

( Kim Minji X Male Reader)

You sigh as you look around the waiting room. It has been a couple of minutes now, since the two girls left. About to stand up, you suddenly see one of the doors open.

The woman in the doorframe makes your eyes widen. Who is she?

The Korean woman wears a black jacket and a pair of shorts. The shorts almost make it look like she isn't wearing anything to cover her core at all. Her black choker and leather boots complete the all black outfit. It looks like she is also wearing fishnets, which barely even reach her knees.

"Ugh! I hate it here."

She slumps down on the chair on your left. Only now you realize she is also wearing a black top.

"How come?"

You decide to talk to her. This isn't an actual waiting room after all, which means she must live here. And that means, she is probably in on all this.

"The doctor is crap."

She doesn't even look at you as she blows a bubble with her gum.

"Which one?"

"The one with the pink hair."

She has her legs and arms crossed, while she sits next to you.

You frown. The two girls you met at the airport had brown and black hair. Whom is she talking about?

"What's your name?"

"Minji. Yours?"

"(Y/n)."

She offers you her fist and you give her a fist bump.

"Is something going on downtown?"

"What?"

You look at her in confusion.

"Is something wrong with your..."

She deliberately looks down at your crotch.

"Why would you ask that?"

"Because the doctors here are specialized in that area."

Minji blows another bubble, letting it pop loudly.

"I see."

It's silent for a couple of moments, before she asks again.

"So? Something going on?"

You ponder if you should tell her. This is still fake. So maybe you will get something out of this. You eye her from the side. Her face looks like that of an angel, although she is currently going for the opposite persona. Her black top is low cut, which means you have no trouble enjoying the view. Because the lower part of her jacket is covering her shorts, it looks like she isn't wearing any pants. Her long, creamy legs are on display.

"I produce too much.... You know?"

You glance at her face as she looks at you.

"I see."

She nods while blowing another bubble.

"And you?"

She shrugs her shoulder.

"I have this kink. Although the doctor says it's an addiction."

She scoffs, before shaking her head.

"What kind?"

You might have sounded a little too curious.

Minji ignores your question as she suddenly looks around.

"Hey, can you make sure no one comes in?"

A little surprised, you nod, before seeing Minji leaving her seat. She walks towards the "counter" before leaning over it. Her jacket rides up as she reaches for something. Her tight black shorts hug her butt perfectly, giving it a perfect shape.

But your eyes are quickly caught by something else. Black ink is decorating her left thigh, right above the back of her knee. The tattoo seems to be made out of three small butterflies.

Once she found it, she turns around, holding up her phone.

"Those idiots took it away from me. They said, I can't stop reading this stuff, but they are just overreacting."

"What kind of stuff?"

You watch Minji walking back to her seat next to you.

"I keep reading fan fiction about me. I'm a rock star, you know?"

"Oh, really?"

"Surprising, right? A sweet girl like me?"

She wiggles her eyebrows mockingly, before turning her phone on.

"And what kind of fan fiction?"

"I found this amazing story on Wattpad least year. The author's name was something with HJK? I dunno. But it was deleted. Luckily, I took a few screenshots."

"And what is it about?"

Minji winks at you.

"It's about how I get my back blown out by the reader."

You don't know how to respond to that. You are glad she keeps talking.

"I'm supposed to have a throat fuck kink, according to the story."

"And is that true?"

You are surprised at how freely she talks about this.

"Well, yeah. I like it. But that's not my favorite thing."

You see her opening her Tumblr account "timetobreedminji". After seeing her username, you are already able to guess, what her favorite thing is. Still you ask her, wanting to hear it from Minji in person.

"And what is your favorite thing?"

The Korean girl looks up from her phone to look at you. Her eyes are big and dark.

"Beeing bred."

Her eyes suddenly become a little darker as if you just triggered something in her.

"The doctors try to convince me, that I'm delusional, but that's not true. Do you know, why my fans call me bunny or rabbit?"

You shake your head. You expected another kind of name for a rock star, but you are in Korea after all.

"Because they all want to breed me."

"Really?"

You don't sound as surprised as you thought you would. Minji nods her head.

"The doctors told me, I'm fertile as hell. Perfect for breeding."

Her phone is lying forgotten on the seat next to her. Glancing at it, you read the title of the post, which she is currently reading. "Doctor's appointment turns into bunny breeding session"

(Author's note: "What the...??")

Minji looks around the room, before sighing heavily.

"Do you know how long it has been, since someone tried to breed me?"

You shake your head.

"About a week ago. I feel so empty."

By now, your dick in your pants is already hard. Forget about Yoohyeon and SuA. You have to fuck Minji first.

"Wait a minute."

She scans you up and down.

"You said your balls are producing too much cum, right?"

You nod your head hesitantly. Minji makes this roleplay stuff feel very real.

"Isn't that great for breeding?"

You should have known this question would come eventually.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, the more you cum in me, the higher the chance you breed me properly."

"But I have an appointment soon."

Minji rolls her eyes in annoyance. Her rock star persona shining through.

"I don't give a fuck. Those doctors are dumb anyways. Wouldn't it help us both?"

You think about it for a moment. She is not wrong.

"You would lose some of that cum of yours and I can be your breeding bunny. That's a win-win."

"I don't see the harm in that."

As soon as you agree, Minji straddles your lap.

"Finally I'm gonna get some cum in my belly."

She whispers, before kissing your lips.

You hold onto her thighs to steady her on top of you. Her soft, creamy skin feels smooth underneath your palm.

Minji grinds on you, rubbing her center against your own. She can feel your hard cock in your pants, which makes her even wetter. As she imagines, how you would cum in her, you start to attack the flawless skin on her neck.

You immediately realize, that Minji only has one goal in mind. She already starts to undo your belt. Having sex is just a way to get what she wants. It's just a means to an end. You wonder if that's the role she is playing, or if that's actually her.

You lift your hips as you feel Minji pull off your pants and your underwear in one go.

"I'm sorry, but I don't have time to suck you off."

The Korean girl's breathing becomes faster as she reaches for your cock.

"I just need your cum in me. As soon as possible."

She let's some spit fall out of her mouth and onto your dick. Her hand makes sure that it's all wet. Still a little surprised at her speed, you are only able to watch as she lifts her hips.

"Get them off me. Please."

She sighs, while waiting for you to pull her pants down as well. The black fabric is tighter around her body as you expected. It takes a second to peel her shorts off of her. She isn't wearing panties, only a small stripe of hair decorates her lower region.

"Put it in already."

Her demands turn into whines as she waits for you to act. You guide her hips towards you, while Minji points your cock at her entrance. As she sinks onto you, you feel her snatch taking in your dick. Minji's walls have a tight grip on you as she lowers herself further.

"If I knew you were so big, I would've taken my time with it."

She sighs as you run your hands along the smooth skin of her thighs.

"I wish I could've felt these around my head."

You tease her as you squeeze her thighs slightly.

Minji sighs heavily, already stuffed with half of your cock. She leans forward, pressing her clothed chest into your face. You feel her hard nipples graze your cheeks as Minji takes a fistful of your hair.

"I'm such a needy bunny, I know."

She pushes your head further into her chest, while she slowly starts to ride you. When she Minji sinks down on you fully, her face is on level with yours. When she moves upwards, she presses your head into her chest. You take every opportunity to kiss her skin as you feel her pussy around your cock. You can feel Minji relaxing and contracting her muscles with the rhythm of her movements. She really does try her best to make you cum as fast as possible.

You wonder, how long you can hold out, not wanting to see this end too soon. You reach behind her to take handfuls of her cheeks. Minji moans into your mouth.

"Just use me, until you cum."

Before you can answer, you are faced with her black top again. When Minji sinks back onto your cock, she throws her head back, letting her hair look like a waterfall behind her.

You start to take control of her bounces, making her go a little faster. Much to her enjoyment it seems as Minji releases moan after moan.

"Make me ride your cock, baby."

Her walls squeeze you tighter, her pussy desperate to milk you dry.

"Fuck, Minji I-"

"Yes! Yes! Cum in me!"

She feels your cock twitching inside of her. You squeeze her ass harder, trying to hold on a second longer as you practically pull her onto your cock, before pushing her off again.

"Breed me! Breed this little bunny!"

You feel pain on your scalp. The result of Minji trying to hold onto her own high, wanting to climax when you cum as well.  It makes your head roll back too as you try to ease the pain.

"Give it to me! Breed me!"

"Fuck."

You moan as you finally unload inside of Minji. You hold her down, her pussy sealed around your cock tightly. The young woman shakes slightly on top of you as she feels her orgasm washing over her, while your cum floods her insides.

You open your eyes, when you finally come down from your high. Minji's chin rests on your shoulder as she tries to catch her breath. This was quite short. And yet, really good. It's evident that she has some experience. You feel your cock still inside of her as Minji slowly rolls her hips.

"Do you think you can give me a another load? Just to make sure you are breeding me properly?"

You could have said no. Maybe you even should have, knowing that the other two girls are waiting for you. And yet, you can't help yourself.

You wrap your arms around her, trapping Minji against your body. The two of you stay connected as you stand up. Although Minji is small and light it's still hard not to trip. You carry her to the kitchen counter as you feel her lips on your neck.

"Drown my pussy in cum, baby."

She whispers into your ear as you sit her down on the counter. She unlocks her legs behind you, enabling you to take them into your hands.

Minji lies down, her back pressed against the cold surface. She can feel it underneath her jacket. She is still wearing her boots and fishnets as you put her ankles onto your shoulders. You have a great view of Minji's pussy as you let your hands glide along her legs. Your fingers dance over the dark butterflies on her skin, until they reach her waist.

You see the young woman nodding. Her gaze a mixture of excitement and need.

Slightly pressing down on her belly, you almost pull out completely.

Pushing back inside, you hear her pussy making wet sounds. You push your cum further into Minji as you start to rock her world on top of her own kitchen counter.

"Oh fuck! So much cum!"

She feels your warm cum inside of her as you fuck her hard.

"Yes! Yes! Yes!"

Minji arches her back off the stone surface. You hold onto her thighs, feeling one of her ankles slowly slip off your shoulder. The young Korean seems to interpret your actions differently.

"Yes! Put me in a mating press! Breed me!"

She moans loudly, almost shouting. You pull her further towards you, making her ass leave the surface. Leaning over her, you push Minji's legs towards her body. You start to fold her in half. Her boots reach her head and she holds onto her own ankles. You place your hands on the back of her thighs, one directly on her tattoo.

Her pleading face makes you fuck her harder. Now you are slightly above her, hitting even deeper spots.

"Fuck yes! Push your cum further!"

Minji mewls as you keep pounding her. You feel your muscles slowy getting tired as you use all your strength to push into Minji. She looks so sexy like that. Lying on her back, her ankles in her hands, unable to do anything but take your pounding.

Your thumb grazes over her butterflies. You are not a fan of permanent tattoos on women, but fake ones like these are very sexy. This one is quite small, but seductive. You wonder how Ahin would look wih a tattoo. Maybe on her back? A big one?

You lose your thoughts as Minji's pussy brings you back to reality. It squeezes your cock tightly, trying to drain you again. You feel your orgasm approaching as you fuck Minji into the counter.

"Gonna cum!"

You are surprised she cums so early, you expected her to orgasm with you again. She reaches around her anke with her left hand, covering her mouth with her hand.

Minji's head rocks back and forth along with her body as you drive her towards her orgasm.

"Fuck!"

Her scream is muffled, yet audible. Her body shakes, a little harder than the first time, as Minji cums around your cock again. It makes her pussy tighter, bringing you closer towards the edge as well.

"Fuck, Minji. I'm gonna cum in you."

"Yes!"

Her hand has left her mouth as she nods her head vigorously.

"Fill me up again! Breed my little bunny pussy! Give me baby bunnies!"

Not the usual choice of words, when someone begs you to cum in them, but Minji makes it sound somewhat alluring.

You grip harder onto her thighs as you push her legs further towards her. She is one flexible woman, taking your pounding in this position with ease.

"Fuck!"

You hiss as you unload a second time in Minji's pussy.

"Yes! Fill my womb! Cum in me!"

Her hole holds onto you tightly as you shoot rope after rope of cum into her freshly fucked pussy.

"So warm."

Minji sighs as she feels your cum inside of her. You lean over her, pressing her legs against her torso.

"I hope you stay addicted to this. I would love to breed you again."

Minji chuckles, wrapping her hands around your neck, pulling you closer.

"Wait for me after your appointment. And don't waste too much cum on them. They don't know how to appreciate it."

[cataboliac]

Enkindle

A sequel to Ignite Son Seungwan 11k words

*Hey Wendy, are you at practice today?*

Trembling fingers typed out the message, a hesitation lingering in each keystroke. Releasing a deep breath, you then hit the send button. The cold air seemed to thicken—your body grappling with the nerves that had been building up all day. The whirring noise did little to calm the unease as you anxiously waited for her response.

*Hon! Yes. We are about to finish up. Isn’t it early morning where you are now?*

You smile—Wendy has no suspicions whatsoever. The plan is going smoothly. 

*I just wanted to start the day right by messaging you first, that’s all.*

*You really know how to make me smile.*

You longed to hear those words from that soothing voice, not distorted behind a microphone or a speaker. 

*I miss you so much. Will I see you again for Christmas?*

Her question replaces the nervousness with guilt. You have a definite answer, but she can't know just yet. 

The standard excuse would have to do for now. 

*Sorry Wannie. I am not sure about the holidays. I’ll keep you updated though, okay?*

*I understand, don't worry. I’m just a bit nervous about our comeback show tomorrow. Wish you were here to see it.*

Seungwan has no idea she's in for such a big surprise.

*You're the best group out there. You're gonna crush it. I will stay up to watch it!*

*I love you. Thank you for always knowing how to cheer me up. Good morning! And good night! :) <3 *

*Goodnight Wannie, I love you too.*

“And see you tomorrow,” you murmur as you look out the porthole. The hum of the engine finally became a comforting backdrop as you neared the end of this carefully orchestrated surprise.  The bright Korean skyline slowly comes into view—the warm glow of lights welcoming you home—as the plane makes its final landing approach to Incheon Airport. 

______________________________________________________________

Two years have flown by since you left Korea. The rhythm of your days found a new beat on the chilly streets of your hometown of San Francisco, where you busied yourself teaching choreography classes. You were no longer bound by the constraints of a strict schedule or dietary regimen, relishing in the anonymity that accompanied the bustling life. Rarely did anyone recognize you, and in this newfound simplicity, you were living.

Yet, the plainness of your new life couldn't fill the void that persisted in your heart. No matter how hard you tried to occupy your time, a significant part of you remained in Seoul. You left many friends and family, leaving an unmistakable ache.

Especially the absence of the love of your life. 

Despite agreeing to a long-distance relationship, you and Seungwan were entering unknown territory. It terrified you both to the core. But you found a way to make it work, communicating daily through messages and video calls. Whether it was before dawn or late at night, your day wouldn't feel complete without sharing moments with each other. The longing for physical closeness only intensified as time passed—the desire to return to Korea echoed persistently in your mind.

Thankfully, you saw each other a few times last year. The previous visit was for Christmas—nearly 11 months ago. You both knew that these sporadic reunions were not sustainable in the long run. The absence of physical intimacy, the constant effort to maintain emotional connections, and the doubts lingering in your minds all pointed towards an inevitable ending.

But you weren't willing to let it end like that.

That's why, since your last trip, you've been quietly discussing plans with friends and family. This next trip will hopefully be more permanent—a chance for a more lasting connection.

You hated keeping Seungwan in the dark, but on the other hand, you didn't want to give her false hope if the plan fell through. It was more important to ensure this worked for a long-term stay before telling her.

Your musings are interrupted by the last of your luggage passing by you on the conveyor belt. Thankfully, you grab it effortlessly and lump it onto the trolley. With all of your belongings in check, you head outside. 

As you exit the revolving doors of Incheon Airport, the icy fresh air of Korea greets you once more in its cold, loving embrace as you step out the doors of Incheon Airport. You have almost forgotten how unforgiving the nippy chill of your hometown can be, forcing you to zip up the rest of your jacket. It is so cold you could see the vapor escaping your mouth as you exhale. 

Your phone suddenly rings, making you jump in surprise. You’ve been on guard tonight because you didn’t want news of you arriving in Korea. You quickly check your phone, only to release an exasperated sigh.

*Hey, have you landed yet? :P *

*Sooyoung… I told you not to message me when you’re with Seungwan…*

*So you did land! Welcome back! :P *

*And stop worrying so much! The other three are keeping Seungwan busy. And how will you know where to enter tomorrow? :P *

Inhaling deeply, you release a breath, expelling all the pent-up nerves. Your shoulders gradually relax, a noticeable lightness replacing the tension. Admittedly, there's a twinge of anxiety about tomorrow, but Sooyoung's wisdom prevails—let the plan unfold naturally.

*Fine, fine. What is the plan for tomorrow?*

While waiting for Sooyoung's text, you navigate your trolley through the parking lot in search of your ride to the Airbnb. A distant flash of car headlights grabs your attention. As you draw near, the familiar silver van evokes a wave of fond memories, a visual echo of countless rides to various schedules.

You stand in front of the van—and without warning—the passenger door opens, and someone engulfs into you with a hug.

"You bastard! It is so good to see you again!" Jaesung crushes you with a bear hug, almost taking the air out of your lungs. You manage to reciprocate, laughing as he whips you around like a ragdoll. He was always the most affectionate and most sociable among your group mates. 

"Never change, man. Never change. Now let me in the car!" 

With the help of Jaesung you get your things in the van and leave the parking lot without anyone recognizing you. With some breathing time, Jaesung catches you up on the latest news around the company.

"And all the new trainees are super talented! We try to be more lenient with them, especially the younger ones in school,” Jaesung says excitedly. He decided to stay with the company and help train the new talent.

“This new role really fits you Jae. I'm glad you stayed.” It helps that Jaesung was the leader of your group before getting disbanded.  

“And soon we will be complete again! Once everyone is free,” Jaesung says, a hopeful—and now—realistic wish now that you are here. 

"Just focus on your surprise with your 'Wannie' baby," Jaesung adds, his cutesy teasing tone making you cover your face in embarrassment. 

The van stops at your destination just in time to save you from more teasing. However, this is not the Airbnb you booked. This actually looks like the subdivision you used to live in.

“Jae, what are we doing here?” you ask him as he helps bring your luggage down from the van.

“This is my surprise to you. Open up your hand.” Fearing another of his famous pranks, you reluctantly open your hand to Jaesung, and he drops you the key to your old apartment—the familiar orange keychain still attached.

“No way…”

“Yeah, way! Don’t worry about it, okay? We talked to the place you booked, and we will figure it out. I kept the place tidy for you. And you got it all to yourself for a week cause I will be out for team building with the trainees. I am sure you will have only one guest over." 

You jingle the keys in your hand, a cascade of memories flooding your mind. From returning home after misadventures to triumphant schedules and that unforgettable night when you confessed to Seungwan—that apartment was a safe space for you.

“I don’t know what to say… just thank you so much Jae.”

“Don't get too sentimental on me yet! Now give me another hug.” The two of you embrace. Jaesung is the heart and soul of your group. The brotherly bonds never faded over time—they only grew stronger. 

"Rest up. You have a surprise tomorrow. See you next week, lover boy!”

Jaesung enters the elevator, and you wave goodbye to each other. Feeling inspired by his thoughtful gesture, you turn towards the door of your old apartment with newfound confidence in your plan. Just then, your phone rings, bringing a detailed message from Sooyoung about the surprise strategy. A smile slowly spreads across your face until it reaches its edges. The realization hits you like a speeding train—you are finally on the verge of reuniting with Seungwan.

______________________________________________________________

Red Velvet bows and thanks their audience again for coming to support them. They did not want to leave the stage, but they still had lots to do for the next day. The standing ovation reverberates through the concert hall, the thunderous cheers accompanying their descent down a corridor toward the private room. In the wake of their performance, the members of their dedicated staff resoundingly offer their congratulations for yet another triumphant fan-sign event.

The excitement from the event engulfs Seungwan in a surge of dopamine, saturating her heart with indescribable joy—the feeling is still the same no matter how far someone is in their career. Being back on stage and able to perform is a feeling she could never trade away. It distracted her from thinking about other things. 

Specifically, it distracted her from her thoughts of him. She really wished he could be there, but she knew affording a flight to Korea was no small feat. Seungwan missed it all—the simple touch of his hands, his cheering that pumped her up, the fiery devotion that set her soul on fire. Missing the love of her life came in waves, and sometimes Seungwan felt she was drowning. 

At least for now, Seungwan can surface and put all those negative feelings at the back of her mind and focus all her energy on the comeback. 

While they walked, the members stuck close to Seungwan, feeling more affectionate than usual. Sooyoung wrapped around Seungwan’s shoulder, holding her close to her side.

"Such a fun fan sign! I even got this cute toy from this sweet fan," Sooyoung says as she holds out a miniature plushie of herself.

"Hey, why didn't I get one? Obvious favoritism!" Yeri shouts, playfully narrowing her eyes and making the others chuckle.

"It doesn't feel so long since our last comeback, but the feeling never gets old," Seulgi says as she throws an arm around Seungwan’'s waist.

Joohyun, who was ahead of everyone, opens the door to their room and peaks inside. She smiles knowingly—satisfied with what she sees—then closes the door and waits for everyone to come closer. 

Everyone stops in front of Joohyun, much to Seungwan's bewilderment. "Is there something wrong?" Seungwan asks.

“I took a quick peek inside and saw something interesting. I think it is for all of us,” Joohyun says as she opens the door and steps inside.

“Oh, a surprise?! Let’s see!” Yeri exclaims excitedly.

Everyone enters the room, but the rest hang by the door to let Seungwan explore first. 

The room started off simple with basic furniture. Now, it's transformed, decked out in oriental banners, colorful streamers, and red and black wallpaper that matches the classy Chill Kill theme. Giant balloons proudly declare "Congratulations" on one wall. But the most fascinating part is the center table, adorned with a red gift-wrapped box and a bunch of violets—Seungwan's favorite flowers.

Seungwan is left utterly speechless, her mind swarming with a million questions. Slowly, she approaches the bouquet and spots an envelope with her name on it, casually leaning against the box. As she picks it up, her heart skips a beat or two. The distinct cursive handwriting is unmistakably his.

A rush of emotions hits Seungwan like a tidal wave. As she reached for the thick, cream-colored envelope, Seungwan's hands trembled. The weight of emotions threatened to overwhelm her, and she struggled to steady her breathing as tears blurred her vision. Her heart pounded in her chest, aching with anticipation. Trying to control her shaky fingers, she tore open the envelope and unfolded the letter inside.

Congratulations on the comeback Wannie! Words cannot put how lucky I am to have met you, that my love is yours, and our two lives are woven and welded together. I will always be beside you. I promise. 

As Seungwan read the words on the page, her heart began to flutter, and her cheeks flushed rosy red. She couldn't help but embrace the letter tightly against her chest, imagining the feeling of his arms around her. The bouquet of freshly picked flowers, a mystery gift tucked within, and now this heartfelt letter; he always had a way of surprising her. Yet, as grateful as she was for these tokens of love, they reminded her of his absence. The room felt emptier than ever as if it longed for him to fill it with his presence. These conflicting emotions stirred in Seungwan's heart, intensifying her longing for him even more.

“This…this is so beautiful. I really wished you were here,” she says, hoping the winds carry her words to the other side of the world.

“I always got your back.” 

Seungwan freezes, her body reacting to that familiar voice—the hairs on her skin rising, hands shaking, and knees threatening to give out. Memories of doubts and fears resurface, remnants of a time when she believed she might never be together with the love of her life again. Those thoughts lingered in the shadows of her mind, haunting her, especially when she was all alone.

Will I ever see him again?

Will he be the same?

Does he truly love me?

Then, that deep, unmistakable baritone voice filled the room, and Seungwan couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort wash over her. She had always held a special place for him in her heart, like a "Reserved" sign on a quiet table in a restaurant—a place she kept safe, hoping she wouldn't be left waiting. 

And today, her date had finally arrived. 

It was a moment she had been eagerly waiting for, yet also dreading—for Seungwan's biggest fear was losing him and being left alone once again. But she was determined to let go of her fears and embrace him with open arms.

She had worked tirelessly to elevate her love above the paralyzing clutches of fear, constantly striving to better herself so he would see her proud of the growth she had nurtured. 

Seungwan believed in miracles and held onto the belief that everyone is meant to live a life full of passion, purpose, and magic. As an idol, it was her duty to share this belief with others and spread positivity wherever she went.

As she turned around, Seungwan finally laid eyes on the one person she had been yearning for so long; her faith was finally rewarded. A warm smile spread on her face as she took in his features. In this beautiful moment, all her worries melted away, and she knew that everything would be okay with him by her side.

______________________________________________________________

It had been approximately 11 months, 12 days, and 23 hours since you last saw Son Seungwan in person. The sight of her now feels like a lightning strike, transporting you back to the moment she first captured your heart. Those full honey lips that speak words of kindness, full moon eyes that seek out the good in people, gentle hair that tumbled in such rich autumnal hues—love grew, yet she still is the same woman you fell so hard in love with.

“Wendy—”

Before you can say another word, Seungwan closes the distance between you and throws herself into your arms with a hug so tight it seems she will never let you go again. You embrace her firmly, taking a step back from the force of her impact. Your collar becomes wet with her tears as she cries out in disbelief while clinging to you. You rub her back soothingly, hoping to alleviate the flood of emotions within her.

"I am here," you repeat to her—and to reassure yourself.

A couple sniffles are heard behind you. "Girls, let's give the two some alone time," Joohyun says as she leads the girls out of the room.  

It takes a moment for Seungwan's breathing to slow. She pulls away from the side of your neck, those hypnotic brown eyes finally meeting yours.

"Ow!" you suddenly cry out as a sharp pain between your shoulder blades shoots up; Seungwan's hand connects with your back.

“How could you do that to me? Making me cry in my makeup and in front of the girls. They are going to tease me to death…” Seungwan says with a pout, but her eyes beam with radiant joy. 

Using your free hand, you retrieve a handkerchief from your pocket to gently dab away the excess tears and makeup that had smudged her face—though she was beautiful regardless. When finished, you return the cloth to its place and hold her face in your hands.

Unfortunately, you could not contain the guilt that was eating you up. “I am so sorry. I didn't want you to hold on to any false hope. I needed to be sure I could stay here longer. I am so sorry–"

Seungwan's velvety lips claim yours with such passion that the weight of any apologies you carry melts away. Your body responds instinctively to her warmth, your lips dancing in perfect unison with hers. As you close your eyes, you are enveloped in a sensory symphony—the plush sensation of each kiss, her favorite fruity perfume invading your senses, and the hint of her sweet strawberry lip tint adding to the intoxicating experience. Your hands move from her face to her shoulders, pulling her closer in a warm embrace as you reacquaint yourself with the feeling of her touch. She sighs contentedly, drawing you nearer as if coaxing out more breath from your lungs.

She breaks the kiss, leaning on your forehead, catching her breath. "Don't you dare say sorry, please. You are here, and that means everything to me."

You exhale, the tension finally dissipating from your body. “Okay. Okay, I won’t.”

“How did you manage to plan all of this?” she asks as she thumbs your cheek and caresses your chin.

“A couple months worth of planning. I had to coordinate a lot with your members and manager.”

“How long are you staying?” 

"Actually… that’s the best part. I am planning to stay in Korea. Possibly for good." The words roll off your tongue effortlessly.

Seungwan's jaw drops, the words short-circuiting her mind in disbelief. "Wait… you’re not leaving?"

You smile, realizing the weight of your words. “I am here to stay.”

Seungwan snuggles into the warmth of your embrace, her laughter ringing in the room in pure disbelief and happiness. After moments of tears, this was a welcomed change, a beautiful call of joy filling the room as she hugged you tighter. Lifting her off the ground, you spin around in an impromptu dance, caught up in the euphoric moment. The realization that you can now share your life together after being apart for so long hits you both with a rush of emotion.

"Wait, did you just propose?!"

"And did you say yes?!"

"Girls! Let them have their moment!"

The rest of Red Velvet stands by the open door, Sooyoung and Yeri playfully held back by Seulgi and Joohyun. You stop and gently set Seungwan on her feet as the others eagerly await your answer. With the moment gone, you intertwine your fingers with hers, content to bask in the romantic moment amidst your friends' presence.

"Don't worry about it. We'll have plenty more opportunities," you say as you lay a gentle kiss on Seungwan's hand. She leans on your shoulder, attempting to conceal her face, not as confident yet in displays of affection in front of her group.

“Ew, too cheesy. I will let it go for now since we get to see Wendy squirm like this,” Seulgi says, holding up her phone to take some pictures. “Did you open your gift yet?” Joohyun asks Seungwan. 

You see the gift box left unopened. Letting Seungwan go, you grab the gift and hand it to her. “Go ahead! I can’t wait for you to see it.”

Seungwan unties the ribbon, allowing it to gracefully fall to the ground. She carefully removes the wrapping paper, revealing a simple black box with no distinguishing features. As she gently shakes it, a faint rattling sound can be heard from within. Intrigued, she lifts the lid, revealing a stunning silver heart necklace. You watch as she becomes enamored with the necklace, running her fingers over its texture and holding it up for a closer look. The other girls gather around her, gushing over the romantic gift.

"I know you already have almost everything, but I wanted to get you something special. Something I haven't given you before... so here it is." Your words come out slightly nervous, unintentionally giving away your feelings, but Seungwan wraps you in another warm hug.

"It's perfect. Will you put it on me?"

She turns around, lifting her hair to expose her slender neck. You take the necklace and delicately place it around her neck, securing the clasp. Turning back around, Seungwan beams at you and plays with the heart pendant hanging from the chain. It does look perfect on her.

"You look beautiful."

As Seulgi snaps a photo and the rest of the girls coo in admiration, this romantic moment is now captured in both of your memories. Your hand seeks hers again, intertwining your fingers and savoring her tender touch.

"Will you join us for dinner?" she asks.

"I wish I could, but I've got to see my grandparents tonight." You catch Seungwan's slight pout, but you squeeze her hand reassuringly.

"I know the group is busy tomorrow, so I made sure to reserve you all to myself the day after, okay?"

Seungwan glances at her group, and they nod back reassuringly. You've ensured a whole day-date, a semblance of a regular routine day with her.

"You really planned for everything. I'm so excited for our day together," she says, kissing you on the cheek.

"And thank you, girls, you've all been amazing with the planning," you acknowledge the girls.

"You better make sure not to hurt her, okay?" Joohyun threatens though the laughter that ensues indicates she's only joking.

As everyone pitches in to help the staff dismantle the decorations, you catch up with the rest of the group. Tomorrow is slated with radio promotions and another music show. Yeri teases about her solo album for next year, adding extra motivation for this comeback. Sooyoung shares updates on her dating life with Crush. Joohyun plans to focus more on acting, while Seulgi is gearing up to delve deeper into studying music production. With the tidying up almost complete, you accompany the girls to the exit.

"I'll see you in two days, okay?" You embrace Seungwan, inhaling her sweet, flowery perfume, still in disbelief that she's in your arms.

"I will. I'm so happy you're back." Seungwan places a tender kiss on your lips before joining the rest of the girls outside.

Finally, alone in the hallway, you slowly lower yourself into an empty chair, a wave of mental and emotional exhaustion washing over you from the whirlwind of the past couple of hours. As you sit there, you can't help but imagine the countless plans for your upcoming date with Seungwan—the words you want to say, the moments you want to share. 

“It’s a date.”

______________________________________________________________

“Stupid jetlag!” 

You quickly try to freshen up, one hand clutching onto your towel while the other manages a toothbrush in your mouth. The relentless jet lag caused you to sleep through the alarm. Seungwan is about to arrive, and you're not even close to being ready.

After a quick mouth rinse, you rush to your closet to look for the outfit you meticulously planned for the day. Just as you pull your shirt over your head, the doorbell chimes. 

"Hold on a sec!" you shout as loud as you can. 

As you finish adjusting your shirt and straightening your collar in the mirror, you notice a few stray hairs and quickly tame them with a comb. You double-check your pockets to make sure you have everything you need before confidently heading towards the door. But before turning the knob, you pause and take a deep breath, mentally preparing yourself for what lies beyond. With a calm exhale, you twist the doorknob and are greeted by a breathtaking sight.

Seungwan radiates confidence in her stylish winter ensemble, a crisp white coat effortlessly draped over her figure. Underneath, an oversized black sweater and a pair of form-fitting jeans show off her curves. Her smile is infectious, lighting up her cheeks that you love to pinch. Her luscious chocolate-hued locks fall freely around her shoulders, the delicate snowflakes adorning them like jewels in a crown. Seungwan's impeccable sense of fashion only adds to her breathtaking beauty—she could make heads turn at every corner.

“It's rude to stare, love,” she playfully chides, the familiar line eliciting a smile from you.

"Sorry, I'm not used to seeing snow angels walk."

"Ugh, too cheesy and still a terrible flirt. You need to relearn my tricks," Seungwan teases, and the two of you share a warm hug, sealed with a chaste kiss on your lips.

"I could use a refresher course. Maybe with a private demonstration?"

"Now, that's a bit better," Seungwan giggles, seemingly satisfied with your response. Banter with her feels as natural as breathing.

"What was with all the noise a while ago?" she asks.

You blush, scratching your head in embarrassment. "You heard all of that? I… kinda woke up late. I was pretty excited for today."

"You are so adorable. What are we doing today anyway?" she asks, sliding her gloved hand into yours.

"Lunch out, grocery shopping after, then I cook you a nice dinner back here. We end the night with a nice movie. How does that sound?" After closing the door, you lead Seungwan by the hand, embarking on a journey towards your date.

“That sounds like a lovely day.”

Today is the dreaded Monday, marking the start of a new work week. As you board the train, you find it teeming with all sorts of individuals—from diligent students to dedicated salarymen, engrossed in the routine of their daily commutes. The air carries a palpable sense of anticipation, passengers absorbed in their smartphones, occasionally stealing glances in expectation of their respective stops. 

However, for you, Monday unfolds as a comforting embrace of normalcy. This is an opportunity for you and Seungwan to revel in the simple authenticity of being yourselves—even if it is just for today. The disguises you two have ensured you won't be recognized, allowing yourselves to go with the flow of people. To the casual observer, you and Seungwan appear as just another couple navigating their way through the ordinary rhythm of a morning commute.

“Arriving at Myeong-dong Station. Please exit on this side"

"This is our stop; let's go! Ready for some lunch?" you ask, leading Seungwan through the sea of people in search of the exit.

Emerging onto the bustling Myeong-dong Shopping Street, the air becomes an enticing medley of delectable aromas from the food vendors. Amid the crowd, you instinctively draw Seungwan closer, ensuring she doesn't get lost in the lively atmosphere. The vendors enthusiastically beckon passersbys to sample their diverse specialties. The sizzling sounds emanating from the pans awaken your appetite, making you lick your lips in anticipation. Although it's been a while since your last visit, the enchantment of this place floods you with cherished memories—and sparks the potential for new ones in the future.

"Anything in mind? You've got an endless supply of food choices." It's been more than a year since you last visited, and the place is surprisingly bustling for this time of day.

Seungwan squeals in joy, already tugging you around to explore the food stalls. "Then what are you waiting for? Let’s go!!"

You observe as Seungwan scans the vibrant street, her eyes searching for anything interesting among the colorful food stalls. Suddenly, her gaze locks onto a stall with skewers. As you both draw closer, the irresistible scent of grilled meat wafts through the air, captivating your senses. The cook applies a generous layer of butter on the hot grill before slowly placing a square Wagyu cube onto the surface. You both watch in anticipation as the meat begins to sizzle and cook to perfection, the savory aroma intensifying with each passing moment.

"How about these? They look amazing!"

Agreeing with her choice, you both approach the vendor. They greet you with a friendly smile as you pick a variety of skewers—odeng, succulent meats, and even some grilled vegetables. You grab the first of the sticks, giving one to Seungwan. Her eyes light up with delight as she chews into the beef. 

"This is so yummy! What's next?"

As you and Seungwan wander through the bustling street market, your eyes dart from one colorful food stall to the next. The sweet aroma of freshly made pancakes entices you, while spicy tteokbokki calls Seungwan from a nearby grill. You both eagerly try different dishes, laughing as you compare flavors and textures. Your stomachs eventually reach their limit, and Seungwan spots a cozy café tucked away in a quiet corner. With relief, you sink into plush chairs, relishing the memories made and the delicious treats still lingering on your tongues.

“I’m stuffed, the tteokbokki finished me,” Seungwan says as she rubs her stomach, sitting down next to you.

“That’s because you had two servings,” you tease, earning you a slap on the shoulder. 

“I can’t help it if it's my favorite snack.” 

Relaxing in the warm and inviting atmosphere of this café, you chat casually while enjoying your hot chocolate and Americano. Seungwan leans against you comfortably, and together you watch people walking by outside. The usual stress of strict managers, rabid fans, and a rigid schedule fades away as you both savor the simple joy of being in the present moment.

"Ready to move?" you ask, and Seungwan nods after sipping the last of her drink. Slipping back into the lively crowd, you guide her to the next destination—an inviting supermarket.

"Next on our agenda: grocery shopping! Any special requests for tonight's menu?" 

Seungwan ponders for a moment, her expression playfully pouting in thought. "I've been craving some spicy beef soup lately... that's not too difficult, right?"

"Not at all! We can definitely do that. The ingredients should be easy to find," you assure her with a grin.

You push a grocery cart confidently through the supermarket, starting with spices and making your way to vegetables before finishing with the crucial component: meat. Seungwan's sharp eye spots the perfect beef brisket, and you add a bottle of soju for a tasty pairing.

At the cashier, you hand over your card and notice the lingering gaze of the cashier as he inspects your name with a subtle smile on his lips. He nods at you, hinting at recognition. Seungwan looks over, also confused by the cashier's behavior.

After paying and packing up your groceries, the cashier bids farewell with a friendly wink.

"Thanks for choosing our store.”

"I always have your back!" he adds.

You're taken aback by his words—your catchphrase.

As you leave the store, a sense of comfort washes over you thanks to the subtle acknowledgment from the cashier. It's a reminder that you can make an impact, and this thought stays with you as you step back into the busy streets.

“We should take a taxi; we got a lot of stuff to carry,” you suggest. 

The clock strikes 4:00 pm. The blazing tangerine sun begins its descent, painting the cerulean sky with a stunning vermillion glow. The streets are bustling with even more people, their voices blending in a symphony of noise. After searching for a while, you finally hail a taxi to take you home. As the car navigates through the bright city lights, Seungwan rests peacefully on your shoulder. You can't help but reflect on the day that has passed—a whirlwind of emotions, shared laughter, and moments with someone who truly understands you. Though this adventure has ended, the warmth it sparked lingers, promising an intimate evening ahead.

______________________________________________________________

The keys jingle in your hand as you insert them into your front door, the metallic locks engaging as the knob turns. "Finally, home sweet home."

You place the groceries in the fridge, waiting to be used for tonight's cooking session. Beyond the kitchen lay the soft glow of the living room, ready to cradle you both in the embrace of a movie night. As the sky turned into a black carpet peppered with shining stars,  the possibility of a connection transcended the ordinary, etching the day into the tapestry of unforgettable memories.

"Hey, want to take a break before we cook?" Seungwan suggests, patting the empty space beside her on the couch.

"We?" you inquire as you settle next to her. Seungwan pulls you in, her arms encircling your waist, snuggling closer. "I don't mind the help, but today is all about you." 

Seungwan giggles, rewarding you with a quick peck on the lips.  "You're always so thoughtful, but it’s our day. Plus, how will I know you won't accidentally set the place on fire?"

"Oh, you might be surprised by how much I've improved," you counter, playfully jabbing a finger into her side and attacking her ticklish spot. Seungwan bursts into laughter, thrashing your arms.

"Wait! Enough! Okay, I trust you for later! Now hush, and let me cuddle with you a bit longer."

You both sink into the plush fabric of the couch, her body pressed against yours. The room is quiet except for the sounds of her steady breaths, which match the gentle movements of her chest. Your fingers slowly explore her smooth skin, rediscovering every inch of her porcelain complexion. In this peaceful moment, you exchange soft kisses on each other's foreheads and cheeks, occasionally lingering on each other's lips in a tender embrace.

The peace is abruptly broken by the sound of your stomach growling like a machine, making the two of you howl in laughter. 

“How are you always so hungry?” 

“I mean, we did walk around a lot today. Come on, dinner won’t cook itself.”

After washing your hands, a delightful surprise awaits as two arms lovingly snake around your waist. Turning around, you find Seungwan with a mischievous grin, playfully tying an apron around you. "Ready to showcase your cooking prowess?"

"Absolutely prepared to dazzle you with my culinary magic!" you exclaim, punctuating your words with an exaggerated twirl of your hands. Gathering the groceries from the fridge, you arrange them across the kitchen counter in a colorful display.

"Magic, huh? Well, I'm ready to be enchanted. What's our first spell?" Seungwan quips.

You slide the vegetables and the wooden chopping board over to Seungwan. "How about you work your magic with these? Chop them up while I prepare the meat."

Seungwan nods eagerly and grabs a nearby knife. She grabs a radish and skillfully chops it into uniform squares. Meanwhile, you expertly portion the meat into chunks, placing them into a generously sized pot you had readied earlier.

Amid the rhythmic chopping, you lean close to Seungwan, your warm breath sending a shiver down her spine. "You know, you're the best chef any culinary wizard could ask for."

Her cheeks blush with a delightful warmth. Seungwan steals a quick kiss on your cheek before cheekily pushing you away. "Keep those compliments coming, and I might just grant you access to a... special tasting."

“Be careful, I would do more than just taste,” you quip back, making Seungwan blush even more than the spices she is expertly mixing.

It takes a while to carefully arrange all the meat and radish into the pot. After setting the heat to medium and closing the lid, you join Seungwan in cutting up the rest of the vegetables. In the midst of the chopping, you open the fridge, retrieving the bottle of soju. You uncork it, pouring a shot for each of you. Tapping Seungwan's shoulder to grab her attention, you propose a toast.

“Let’s take a quick break before I check on the meat. What should we toast to?” you ask, raising your glass to Seungwan.

She reciprocates the gesture, intertwining her hand with yours. “To us. I still can’t believe you are here; it means the world to me. Thank you for the best surprise ever”

“To us.”

The two of you clink your glasses and then down the shot, savoring the sweet strawberry flavor swirling around your tongues and down your throats. A swift kiss on Seungwan's forehead punctuates this intimate moment before focusing back on the simmering pot. 

With practiced precision, you carefully remove any impurities from the stew and discard them in the waste can. A satisfied grin spreads across your face as you examine the perfectly cooked meat, even inserting a knife to confirm its tenderness. You add it to the bowl of spices Seungwan has meticulously prepared, and you mix everything together with care, taking turns when one of you gets tired. Once everything is well-mixed, you transfer the flavorful combination into a clean pot, turning up the heat and sealing it with a lid.

All that remains is to wait for the 15-minute timer to sound off. As you head back to the couch, you notice Seungwan making her way to your bedroom with her bag in tow.

"I'm going to take a quick shower. And no, you can't join. Not yet, anyway," Seungwan declares, followed by a playful giggle and a wink in your direction.

You stare, dumbfounded, as Seungwan gracefully removes her shirt in one fluid motion. A fleeting glimpse of her bare back adorned with a red lacy bra almost takes your breath away. But before you can fully process the sight, her discarded t-shirt is suddenly covering your face, obscuring your view. You hear the door to your room close and know she's left, but a soft laugh escapes your lips as you fold her shirt and place it on the couch. With some time alone, you browse through popular romance movies while eagerly anticipating the intimate magic that will unfold with Seungwan after her refreshing shower.

You stumble upon the perfect movie just as the alarm announces that dinner is finally ready. Swiftly turning off the TV, you make a beeline for the kitchen. Lifting the lid, you give the stew a stir before seizing a spoon to sample the creation. The spicy tang of the soup dances on your tongue, each spice contributing to a delightful symphony of flavors. The vegetables are cooked to perfection—soft and infused with the spices. You relish the rich essence of the meat, savoring its tenderness as you taste a piece.

“I heard the alarm! How does it taste?” Seungwan's voice echoes from the hallway, her footsteps drawing nearer.

“Try it yourself! You are in for a treat.”

Seungwan strolls into the kitchen, clad in an oversized black long-sleeved blouse, paired with her favorite gray sweatpants. The ensemble is simple yet exudes comfort and elegance. As she glides past you to fetch a spoon, the delightful scent of her favorite fruity shampoo lingers in your mind, causing your heart to flutter ever so slightly. Observing her tasting the soup, you witness her face light up like a Christmas tree, a radiant expression that adds warmth to the homey kitchen atmosphere.

"Wow, that Yukgaejang is delicious! Consider me charmed, my magical chef," Seungwan exclaims, accompanying her words with a high-five.

"Glad that it impressed you. Couldn't have done it without my wonderful sous chef," you respond with a grin.

"You've definitely stepped up your game! Come on, let’s set the table; I'm starving!"

Together, you and Seungwan set the table with plates and silverware for two. You carefully place the pot on a sturdy surface so that it will not damage the delicate cloth underneath. Seungwan brings over the already open bottle of soju and pours two shots. The fragrant stew is served, and you both sit at the table, ready to enjoy the fruits of your culinary collaboration.

Seungwan raises her shot glass, proposing a toast once again. “What should we give thanks for this time?”

You pause, deep in thought, while you rest your chin on your hand before coming up with an answer. “Let's toast to a successful comeback for you! I hope you get to showcase your beautiful voice even more.”

Seungwan's cheeks turn a deep shade of red as she laughs in delight at your praise. Together, you down the shot and quickly express gratitude for the food before eagerly digging in.

The meat was cooked to perfection, a tender and succulent masterpiece that effortlessly parted with every bite. The blend of spices was impeccable, offering a subtle sting that elevated the flavors and made your taste buds dance. As you sipped on the smooth soju, it complemented the meal in perfect harmony, adding a touch of warmth and depth to each dish. Your conversations with Seungwan were seamless, transitioning between updates from the fast-paced idol world to the simple nuances and joys of your everyday lives. The laughter and chatter rose and fell like a soothing melody, creating an atmosphere of comfort and closeness amidst the feast before you.

Seungwan savors the last spoonful of her soup, letting out a satisfied exhale and tenderly rubbing her stomach. "Okay, now I'm absolutely stuffed. It tasted just like Mom's cooking!"

"I've been practicing some of your favorite dishes, just in case," you confess, avoiding direct eye contact. Nervousness tingles through you as you admit this, the desire for the evening to be perfect for her evident.

"You're such a sweetheart. Thanks for remembering." Seungwan rises from her seat, dashing over to you and enveloping you in a tight, appreciative hug.

“Anything for you.” 

The two of you tidy up the remnants of dinner, carefully storing the leftovers in a Tupperware container. After placing the food in the fridge, you excuse yourself for a quick shower while Seungwan prepares for movie night. 

Under the soothing stream of hot water, you reflect on the special day spent with her. Usually, plans can fall apart, yet tonight has been nothing short of perfect. You hope there are little days like these to share with her in the busy years to come. After a brisk drying off and a quick change of clothes, you find Seungwan engrossed in her phone, a bowl of popcorn perched on the table, and the movie already queued up.

“What's the movie about?” Seungwan inquires as she cozies up to you, resting her head on your chest. Your arms envelop her waist, and your legs naturally intertwine with hers, creating an intimate embrace.

“It's called 'Nothing Serious.' So it's about two strangers who despise dating but meet through an app. Sounds cliché, but Sooyoung highly recommended it.”

"I'm a total sucker for these chick flicks! What are we waiting for?" she exclaims, eagerly reaching for the remote and clicking the play button. 

The film seemingly starts with a standard storyline: two individuals, weary of the dating scene, decide to give a dating app one last shot. Yet, what captivates you about the movie are the authentic characters and a plot that unfolds with logical precision. 

Personally, you find a connection with the male lead. The character arc, shifting from one job to another, mirrors the quest for a stable connection—echoing the cycle of moving from one relationship to the next, hoping for something enduring.

On the flip side, the female lead exudes stability but carries the baggage of a long-term relationship. Certain aspects of the character evoke thoughts of Seungwan, and you find yourself entirely absorbed in the narrative.

As the movie progresses, you can't help but steal glances at Seungwan. Her eyes are fixed on the screen, her expression a mixture of amusement and contemplation. These little moments make you realize how lucky you are to have her by your side. The warmth of her body against yours creates a sense of comfort, a feeling that makes you believe in the power of relationships.

Lost in your thoughts, you find yourself wondering about the future. Where do you see yourself and Seungwan in five years? Ten years? The possibilities seem endless, yet you can't help but feel a tinge of apprehension. Will your relationship withstand the test of time? Will you both be able to navigate the challenges that life throws your way?

But as you steal another glance at Seungwan, her eyes meet yours, and all the doubts wash away. In this moment, it's as if time stands still, and the worries about the future fade into insignificance. Today, with all its wondrous details, comes rushing back to you—the laughter shared over lunch, the gentle touch of her hand on yours during groceries, and her smile lights up the room during dinner.

Seungwan, sensing a shift in your mood, pulls away slightly and looks at you with concern etched across her face. "What's wrong?" she asks softly, her voice filled with genuine worry. 

You take a deep breath, gathering your thoughts before responding to Seungwan's question. You reach out to her and gently cup her face, your thumb tracing circles on her cheek. 

"Nothing is wrong, Seungwan," you assure her, mustering a small smile. "I was just lost in my thoughts, thinking about how lucky I am to have you in my life." Her expression softens as she leans into your touch, her arms slowly intertwining around you. 

"You're the one who makes me feel lucky every single day. You found a way to keep us together and found a way back to me," she whispers, her voice filled with tenderness.

"I know we've both had our fair share of ups and downs, and the future can be uncertain," you confess, your voice tinged with vulnerability. "But being here with you. Right now. In this moment, I believe we can face anything together." 

Seungwan's eyes glisten with tears. "I believe it," she replies softly. "We've weathered storms, and nothing could make me happier. We can do this. Together. For the rest of our lives."  

You sit silently for a moment, letting Seungwan's words sink in. She's right, you think to yourself. You've faced obstacles and challenges before, and you've come out stronger together. The doubts and uncertainties about the future fade as a renewed sense of hope and determination washes over you.

With every passing day, your love for each other grew powerful. You navigated through life's challenges hand in hand, supporting and encouraging one another every step of the way. Together, you inspired each other to reach for the stars and chase after your dreams.

As the movie climaxes, you and Seungwan inch closer to each other on the couch. Your eyes flicker from her luscious lips to her awaiting body, unable to decide where to focus first in this moment of intense desire. Your heartbeat thunders in you—overcharged like a thundering storm about to unleash its power. It's as if all the love and passion built up over the years together is now coursing through your veins, causing every nerve ending in your body to spark with electricity. Adrenaline surges through you, making it impossible to sit still as you feel yourself being pulled closer to Seungwan by an irresistible force. The warmth of her body seeps into your skin, making your heart race and your nerves tingle. 

Seungwan's almond-shaped eyes flicker with a potent mix of desire and vulnerability, revealing the intense emotions below the surface. They dart between your eyes, lingering on your lips with an almost palpable hunger. A glossy sheen coats her full, pouty mouth as she licks it hungrily, biting down gently with trembling anticipation. Each rise and fall of her chest is like a heavy drumbeat, her breaths coming in labored gasps that fill the air with heated tension. The deafening silence between you is only broken by the sound of her clothes rustling as her thighs rub together uncontrollably in response to her overwhelming desire for you.

Your other hand trembles as it reaches out to cup Seungwan's face, the need to touch her overwhelming. Your fingers trace every curve and angle of her jawline with aching tenderness, reveling in the softness of her skin beneath your touch. Her breath hit ever so slightly as her eyes searched yours, their depths filled with longing and desire. In this shared gaze, you find solace and reassurance—a silent understanding of all that has led to this moment. The stolen glances whispered confessions, and unspoken declarations culminated in this intense and electric connection between you both.

The flickering images on the screen were a mere background to the intense emotions coursing through the two of you. Seungwan's arms now fully enveloped you, her hold so tight it felt like your ribs might crack under the pressure. Your gaze locked with hers, igniting a fire that burned hotter with each passing second.

Your voice shook as you bared your heart, desire burning within you.

"I can't hold it in anymore. I need you. Right here and now."

Seungwan's lips curve into a knowing smile, and you lean in to kiss her softly. The taste of her cherry lip balm lingers on your lips as she responds eagerly, her hands tangling in your hair. The heater crackling in the background pales to the heat radiating between your bodies. You can feel Seungwan's quickened breath against your neck as you press closer, your kisses growing more urgent with each passing moment.

Without breaking the embrace, you slowly guide her back onto the plush couch cushions, your body hovering over hers. The sounds of the movie playing on TV fade away as your senses are consumed by the intensity of desire and passion between you.

Your hands explore every inch of Seungwan's body, tracing the curves and contours that have become so familiar to you. You revel in the softness of her skin, the way her body arches beneath your touch, and the way she responds to your every caress.

As your lips continue their dance, your hands find their way to the hem of Seungwan's shirt, slipping underneath the fabric and grazing over her heated flesh. A gasp escapes her lips, mingling with the soft moans that escape your own mouth. The hunger between you intensifies a raw and primal need that cannot be denied. With trembling hands, you begin to undo the buttons of her blouse, revealing the swell of her breasts and the lacy fabric of her bra. Your mouth hungrily finds its way to her collarbone, peppering kisses along the delicate curve that hits her sensitive spot that you know drives her crazy, Seungwan moaning even louder into the room.

Her hands grip your chest, her nails digging into your skin as she pulls you closer. The taste of her desire fills your mouth as your lips move from her collarbone to the exposed skin on her chest. You can feel her heart pounding against your lips, matching the rhythm of your own racing heartbeat. The room is filled with an electric energy, each touch igniting a fire within you. You feel the weight of the moment, the merging of souls and bodies in perfect harmony. Seungwan's fingers then fumble with the buttons of your shirt, a sense of urgency driving her actions.

As Seungwan unbuttons the last of your shirt, a cool breeze hits your exposed chest. You and Seungwan pause from your passionate kiss, resting your foreheads against each other. With one final kiss, Seungwan whispers, "Let's go to your room. Right now."

______________________________________________________________

Seungwan's mind is a jumbled mess of hunger and desire, the sensation swirling through her veins like wildfire. Her voice shakes with urgency, igniting a flame that had long been dormant. Without hesitation, they hurry towards the bedroom, their steps quickened by anticipation and longing.

The dimly lit room transforms into a sanctuary, a haven where time seems to stand still, allowing only the essence of the two souls to matter. The gentle radiance from the bedroom lamp creates soft shadows on the walls, casting an intimate aura over the space. Positioned at the edge of the bed, he locks eyes with Seungwan, a gaze that sends shivers down her spine in response. In this moment, there's an unspoken understanding that transcends mere physical desire. It's a culmination of emotions, a profound connection that defies verbal expression.

Seungwan moves towards him with deliberate steps, her every movement is laden with purpose and anticipation. Her hand extends, fingers trembling ever so slightly, and he responds by intertwining their fingers.

His free hand glides along the contours of her body, leaving a trail of tingling sensations in its wake. Seungwan's breath catches as he leans in, his lips gently brushing against her earlobe, eliciting shivers all over her body. "I've been waiting for this moment," he whispers, his voice octaves lower.

He is typically gentle and soft-spoken, but when his voice deepens, taking on a commanding tone, Seungwan finds it irresistibly sexy when he assumes control. With assertiveness, he leads Seungwan onto the bed, where their bodies sink into the plush mattress. Their lips meet once again, but this time with an intensity born from the depths of their souls. Their tongues flick against each other in perfect rhythm, igniting the passionate fire brighter between them.

Seungwan feels his hand cup one of her breasts, eagerly kneading out the softness of her mound. She gasps as his touch sends electric currents through her body, making her break away from their kiss with a loud moan. His lips move down to her neck, nipping and sucking at her sensitive spot, causing her mind to go wild with pleasure.

As they continue to engage in foreplay, his other hand deftly unclasps her bra, releasing it from her chest. Using this opportunity, Seungwan rolls over him, straddling his lap. She takes advantage of the position, teasing him by slowly removing her bra from one arm at a time, keeping it close to her breasts. He watches with hunger in his eyes as she removes her shirt and finally lets the bra fall, revealing her ample bosom jiggling freely in the air, her warm mink nipples taut from arousal.

"And I am all yours."  

Son Seungwan is an unwavering force, her spirit forged in the fires of adversity and molded into a fierce independence that has weathered every challenge life has thrown her. She has endured and overcome every challenge that life has thrown at her—from leaving her home country to surviving a crippling injury and bearing this long-distance love—refusing to show weakness. But now, as she sits naked before him, her walls crumble like a dam, giving way to a raging river of emotion. Every fiber of her being surrenders to this moment, giving herself to him.

He captures her lips hungrily, his hands roaming over her body with a sense of urgency. His fingers brush against the swell of her breast, causing her to gasp and arch towards him. Seungwan's heart races as his mouth moves down her neck, leaving a trail of hot kisses in its wake. She can feel herself growing wet with desire as he inches closer to her chest, his warm breath sending shivers down her body. 

Suddenly, his mouth is on one of her breasts, sucking lightly on a sensitive nub. She moans loudly, the sound echoing throughout the room. Her back arches, giving him more access to her succulent bosom as she trembles under his touch. His tongue swirls around her nipple while his fingers gently twist and pull on the other, driving her wild with pleasure. She is putty in his hands, lost in the sensations coursing through her body as he continues to worship every inch of her curves.

With a swift motion, he lifts Seungwan onto the middle of the bed, her body sinking into the soft sheets. The faint scent of vanilla lingers in the air as they embrace. He traces kisses along her stomach, causing her abs to tense and quiver under his touch. His strong hands unbutton her jeans in a skilled manner, pulling them down with ease as she raises her legs to help him. Her red lace panties cling tightly to her skin, revealing a damp spot at their center.

He moves down to her feet, peppering them with gentle kisses before trailing his lips up her legs. A shiver runs through her body as he reaches her inner thighs, his warm breath sending tingles to every nerve ending. She can't help but let out a small whimper as he presses against the fabric covering her core, feeling how wet and ready she is for him.

"Please," she begs with desperate longing in her voice, unable to wait any longer.

He quickly strips away the last remaining barrier between them, revealing Seungwan fully naked and vulnerable before him. She bites her finger nervously as she awaits his next move, anticipation building inside her.

Without a moment's hesitation, he dives in and begins his oral ministrations on her sensitive folds. Seungwan gasps loudly at the initial contact of his tongue and raises her hips to meet his eager mouth. His strong arms hold her down as he enthusiastically licks and kisses her, eliciting squirms and moans from Seungwan. She grabs the bed sheets tightly, her body responding intensely to his touch. He surprises her by sliding two fingers inside her tight warmth, causing Seungwan to clench around him and cry out in pleasure.

Feeling overwhelmed, Seungwan reaches out for his hand to help ground herself. But even with this distraction, she can't stop the overwhelming sensations building within her. With each flick of her clit, she gets closer and closer to the edge until, finally, she explodes in waves of ecstasy. He catches every drop of her release, some of it spilling onto his jaw as he hungrily laps up her juices. Her thighs grip him tightly, leaving marks with her nails digging into his hand, a pleasurable pain that only adds to their intense connection.

As Seungwan's body calms down, he continues to kiss and lick her folds for good measure. As he releases his hold on her, he moves up to kiss her body. Still riding the wave of pleasure from her orgasm, she shivers at every touch of his lips. When he reaches her face, she pulls him in for a passionate kiss, tasting herself on him and reveling in the intensity of their intimate moment together.

______________________________________________________________

"Your. Turn."

Seungwan's eyes glimmered with determination as she expressed her desire to return the favor. You eagerly lie down beside her, anticipation building in your chest as she shifts downwards towards your groin. Her hand deftly finds its way to your bulge, causing a moan to escape from your lips. Looking up at you for confirmation, Seungwan tugs on the hem of your pants. You give her a quick nod, allowing her to remove them, freeing your member from its confines. With practiced skill, she wraps her fingers around your shaft and begins to slowly pump, perfectly gauging just how much pressure and speed you like. Unable to contain yourself any longer, you let out deep groans and grunts as she expertly pleasures you.

"Babe, it feels… larger than last time…"

As she slips her tongue between her parted lips, Seungwan's eyes lock onto yours with a hungry intensity. You feel yourself getting stiffer as she traces delicate circles around your swollen head, her eager mouth lapping up the salty pre-cum that beads along the tip. She teases you with a soft kiss before engulfing your length in one smooth motion, sucking hard and sending electric shocks of pleasure through your entire body. The intense sensations make it difficult to catch your breath, and you can't help but moan as she works her magic on you. Your stomach clenches with every movement of her mouth, and the visual alone is enough to drive you wild, causing you to throw your head back in ecstasy.

Your lover eagerly takes more of your length into her mouth, increasing the speed and intensity of her movements with each passing second. Her tongue swirls and dances around you, creating sparks of pleasure that shoot through your body. You grip her soft, silky hair tightly in your hands, using it as leverage to guide her movements and deepen the sensation. With each downward stroke, she takes you deeper and deeper, coaxing out moans of ecstasy from deep within you. The erotic display happening between your legs is a masterpiece of passion, her lips and tongue working in perfect harmony to bring you to the edge of bliss. Your hips involuntarily buck with each skilled motion, driving you closer and closer to the peak of pleasure. And when she hums softly against you, the vibrations sending shivers down your spine, it's all you can do to hold on as the sounds emanating from her mouth push you over the edge into pure ecstasy.

You feel the familiar tight sensation radiating from your abdomen. Not wanting to finish too soon, you gently hold Seungwan's head in place as she takes a break. When she pulls away, a spittrail is left between your member and her mouth. She resumes stroking you with one hand at a relaxed pace.

“Are you okay?” she asks, moving her hand slowly.

“You're going to drive me insane. That was incredible,” you manage to say. 

Seungwan chuckles and kisses her way back up to your lips.“You make me crazy, too. I think I'm ready.”

You and Seungwan have been intimate multiple times before, but tonight feels different. It feels like a promise come true, the culmination of years of friendship turning into love, a reward for having faith in each other. It's a reminder that there could be many more nights like this. As your bodies join together, you are bonded in every sense.

She positions herself above you, aligning her core with your length.

"I love you, Seungwan."

"And I love you too."

Seungwan lowers herself onto you, and as she takes you deep inside her, a new level of tightness envelopes your senses. Her eyes roll back in ecstasy as she reaches for your shoulders, her nails digging into your skin to hold on. You guide her down from her waist, feeling every inch of her sliding against every inch of you.

She can barely speak through the intense pleasure. "Babe...you're so...fuck...bigger..."

"Wannie… you feel even tighter..." You instinctively grip her hips, trying to hold on to some sense of control amidst the overwhelming sensation of being surrounded by Seungwan's incredible tightness. She feels scorching hot, dripping wet, and tighter than ever before. It takes everything in you not to lose yourself completely. But as Seungwan sinks further onto you, pressing her body against yours with an unbreakable seal, you give in to the intense pleasure and pull her into a fierce kiss. Your shared breaths taste sweet as she hums against your lips, driving you both closer to ecstasy. With one final push, you are fully immersed inside Seungwan, lost in each other's embrace, until the world fades away into pure bliss.

After a brief moment of stillness, Seungwan leans back with a mischievous glint in her eyes. She presses her hips against yours, moving in a slow and hypnotizing rhythm. Each movement sends waves of pleasure coursing through your body, making you moan and writhe in ecstasy. The bed squeaks and creaks beneath the intensity of your passion, the sounds blending with the loud slapping of skin against skin.

Your hands roam greedily over her body, exploring every curve and dip as she squirms under your touch. Seungwan's mouth falls open as she nears climax, her nails digging into your skin in pleasure. You pick up the pace, driving her closer to the edge with each thrust until she explodes in a frenzy of bliss. Her scream echoes through the room as her body trembles, and she collapses onto your chest. As she enters into her second orgasm of the night, she clings tightly to you while still trying to ride you to your own release.

You want to hold onto this moment for as long as possible, so you keep her in your arms. "Let me take charge," you whisper as you roll over and remain inside of her. Seungwan moans from the sudden change in position.

"Oh God, so deep."

You thrust into Seungwan, your pace quickening as you feel yourself surrendering to the intense desire to make love to her. She clings onto you with unbridled desperation, begging for more as she writhes beneath you in a frenzy of pleasure. You sink your teeth into her neck, leaving passionate red marks as she cries out in ecstasy. Her body shudders and quakes around you, signaling her impending release. Your movements become even more fervent, pushing deeper inside of her until your bodies are slick with sweat and burning with desire. 

The pleasure intensifies, a warm sensation spreading throughout your entire being as you try to prolong this blissful moment. Seungwan's inner walls tighten around you, her legs wrapped tightly around your waist and pulling you closer. 

In a final act of passion, she kisses you deeply as both of you reach the peak together. Your body tenses with ecstasy as you release everything inside her, marking her as yours forever. Waves of pleasure ripple through you as Seungwan's walls milk every last bit out of you, leaving her filled to the brim. You stay connected for a while, not wanting to collapse on top of her. When the throbbing finally subsides, you roll off to the side and feel the aftermath dripping onto your legs. 

The weight of the experience leaves you drained and weary, but you still manage to pull the soft blanket over the two of you, pulling Seungwan into your embrace. Her body conforms perfectly against yours as she rolls to your side, her lips pressing gently against your cheek in a sweet gesture. You can feel the warmth radiating from her skin, soothing any lingering tension or discomfort. In return, you kiss her forehead before finally succumbing to exhaustion and closing your eyes. The peaceful moment envelops both of you like a warm cocoon, protecting you from the outside world and its worries.

______________________________________________________________

A trickle of light passes through the blinds. It’s been ages since an alarm clock wasn’t necessary to start the day.

You also can’t remember the last time you felt this body ache. Every external sensation feels like a sledgehammer, pulverizing your skull as your eyes barely open. Awareness slowly kicks in, and you start remembering the events of last night.

You attempt to sit up in bed, but a weight prevents you from doing so. In your arms is the person you love, fast asleep and looking peaceful. She stirs awake and gives you a small smile. It feels surreal, but her lips on yours confirm that it's all real—she is here with you in this moment.

"Good morning, Wannie."

"Good morning, last night was...indescribably perfect." 

Perhaps this is just a part of life's journey. You meet someone and fall deeply in love, and suddenly, nothing seems too daunting or frightening anymore; every day is full of endless possibilities. Maybe we needed to go through rough patches to be stronger and more beautiful on the other side. Love can be found in the most unexpected places, shining bright even in the darkest moments. And Seungwan is proof that all of this exists, bringing light into even the bleakest situations.

"So, what's the next adventure planned for today?"

Well, it really has been a minute.

Hello everyone, and thank you so much for reaching the end of "Rekindle." If you haven't read "Ignite" yet, no worries! I designed this fic to stand on its own (though please give my debut fic a read! I love that baby so much).

It's not easy for me to say this, so I'll be straightforward: this marks the end of my writing journey.

Two years ago, I posted "Ignite" inspired by countless fan fics I had read. It was my way of expressing myself—a little bit of escapism. I needed to channel all the pent-up energy. I made wonderful friends, built confidence, got a plethora of new skills. But like any writer, I faced a lotttt of doubts and grappled with lotttsssss unfinished drafts. My writing consistency waned as mental health struggles took their toll.

I needed a break, especially because I needed to focus up on my actual life out there. I had been living too fast, too pressured. And the break did wonders to my life. As my mental health improved, so did various aspects of my life. I felt compelled to write one last fic, but only really felt ready to do one last fic. I think it was fitting I started and ended with the idol that drew me into k-pop! Sadly, my time to write is running out due to a new chapter in my life—I've landed my dream job!

I'm immensely grateful for this incredible journey as a writer. This journey made me discover a side I never thought I could do. I am confident in my writing and expressing myself in writing and in person. I owe my growth to the many friends I met here. This fic is dedicated to everyone I met, talked, and made wonderful memories with!

It's been an awfully beautiful adventure, and in the next life, I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Thank you for two years of writing and unwavering support!

[starwrighter]

Dude, get a restraining order

(Prompt) (Ao3 link)

(The results from the poll have arrived!! You have chosen unintentional Yandere Damian! )

Danny had a feeling the next several months were going to suck. Out of everyone in his school, he'd been the one picked for the whole "Transfer student," nonsense. With his reputation, you'd think he'd be the last person you'd want to show off out of state.

Regardless, Danny was chosen, and now he was on a plane headed to New Jersey Gotham. "The City of Crime" sounds like a blast and a half. All the rouges and criminals that wouldn't be his problem to deal with. It seemed like heaven in theory, but Danny knew with his luck he'd be getting mugged left, right, and center.

Pressing his face against the window, Danny allowed his mind to wander. To the portal, the friends who wouldn't be here to support him, to the ghosts who didn't want to kill him. Dani and Val were going to pick up the slack back home but that wouldn't help with the rumors no doubt going around about Phantom's disappearance. He could only hope he still had a secret identity when he got home.

Maybe if he did crime against the local vigilantes he'd get sent home early...

No, the rouges and local criminals did that on a daily basis they wouldn't crack from a little trolling. Or maybe they would? Then again, Red Hood used guns and the current Robin ran around with a real ass god-damn sword so trolling was a bad idea.

In all honesty, Robin was intimidating even with the little information he had about him. All he had were blurry, articles from various news outlets and attempted interviews with some ridiculously persistent reporter. Robin sounded more cryptic than he was! The entire concept of a teenager his age manifesting out of the shadows and chasing him with a katana would forever be his biggest concern during his stay in Gotham.

When the plane touched down Danny was left in a busy airport terminal. Vague instructions from his teachers and chatter from the employees trying to get him out onto the street as soon as possible were all he had to go off right now. Also, a brochure that he was 90% sure was all bullshit.

Gotham's air felt closer to smoke than it was anything breathable. Burning his nostrils, a scent of gas and cigarette smoke pretty much engulfed the city. It was so bad the second he took a breath, his core jolted, snapping into gear, not allowing anything to enter his lungs before it filtered. He'd never been so glad about dying until now, and never had he ever been as impressed in a population as he was now.

Danny had only been here for ten minutes or so but he'd already come to the conclusion that Gothamites were as metal as amity parkers. Wandering through the city, Danny tried to keep his face neutral. Not a smile or the slightest tell that he wasn't from here. He'd rather not get mugged before he reached his apartment. Though, maybe a fatal injury would get him sent home early.

Looking down at the map on his phone, Danny drew closer to the apartment building he'd been assigned to stay at. Supposedly, it was closer to the rich kid school he'd be temporarily attending. Why they decided it was okay for a teenager to live by himself in Gotham was a complete and total mystery. He could only hope he wouldn't die a second time during his stay.

Getting the key from the front desk was a much easier process than he'd thought It'd be. But it could never be quick enough. His suitcases were heavy!! And he was so very very tired. When he got into his apartment he tossed his suitcases onto the floor, inspecting the place he'd be staying for the next few months. It pretty good setup, a bathroom with a combined bath and shower, a tiny kitchen for cooking, and a small bedroom with a twin XL mattress. Grey sheets that Danny didn't quite trust were clean. Danny barely had the time to settle in before he was pelted with schedules, school rules, and uniform requirements.

His uniform as supplied by the school was a navy blue blazer with the school label embroidered on the pocket. A tie striped black and blue tucked into a stuffy-looking dress shirt. Overall it felt more like he was dressing up for one of Vlad's stupid Gala's than it did school.

He wasn't given any time to unpack, not a second to relax or get used to his surroundings. Nope! He was expected to pack up his school supplies and head to school right away! Seriously, not a minute before the front office was asking where he was, as if offended he didn't teleport to school the moment he touched down.

The school itself was intimidating. Twice the size of Casper High, it looked like a private school. It also looked like a school where he'd face severe bullying. Just from looking at the entrance, he could tell this building had proper equipment down to the most obscure of clubs. Kids rushed past him some looking panicked as a school bell rang while others just seemed annoyed.

He strolled leisurely through the school hall on the way to the office. There was no rush, he didn't even want to be here. What were they going to do? Send him home? Oh no, what a tragedy! Snickering under his breath, Danny scrolled through the avalanche of texts Vlad was sending him. All of them pertaining the same message of "Get your ass to school you're making me look bad!" It almost convinced him to skip but the pissed-off edge to the office lady's voice in their last phone call was enough to goad him into creeping into the office.

A face of thinly veiled annoyance rested on the desk lady's face. He could barely get a word out before a school map and schedule were shoved into his hands. A bare-bones explanation of the school rules was given along with his school ID before he was all but shouted at to get to class.

You'd think there'd be an adjusting period where they'd walk him through everything and let him get settled in at his own pace, but nope! This is Gotham! Apparently, that's not how they roll with transfer students. It's like they wanted him back in amity as much as he did.

He wasn't sure if he liked that or not...

(I don't know who want's to be tagged for this one)

[wreckedandpolemic]

thinking about white and gold and their first holiday together... they have at least a fortnight (knowing matty) all to themselves, freedom to do anything they want... what's the vibe

ooh yes this is good mads i love your mind !!! this happening relatively early into your relationship because we know how fast these two move lmfao maybe that couple of weeks after new year’s where it’s kind of just bitter and miserable outside. you’re in matty’s lap in the living room, sighing wistfully at the pool outside. what’s the matter, darling?

s’just a bit shit outside, you mutter. i miss the summer. matty’s typing away at his laptop out of your view, his free hand rubbing soothing circles into your thigh. you got anything important planned in the next few weeks? you shrug, don’t think so.

good, matty beams, turning his laptop screen to you happily, a confirmation email displayed on the screen. two weeks in the mediterranean enough to cheer you up? and of course, you roll on top of him, thanking and kissing him excitedly. pack light, okay? wanna spoil you while we’re there. immediately, you proceed to show him just how grateful you are (and maybe join the mile high club on the way there teehee)

the cottage matty’s booked for the two of you in rural southern italy is absolutely gorgeous, light and airy, all white stone walls and tiled floor. you change out of your airport clothes into something more fitting; a tiny, white sundress and nothing else but a pair of alexander mcqueen sunglasses. draping yourself in matty’s lap, you all but moan at the sight of him in just a pair of loose linen trousers.

mmm, what are you feeling like getting up to today? matty asks, cupping your jaw and kissing you softly. oh, a nice walk on the beach, a candlelit dinner, getting fucked dumb by my daddy, maybe a little swim? you tease, savouring matty’s sharp intake of breath. in no particular order.

needy girl, christ, matty mutters, shifting his hips under you. grabbing his hand, you slide his fingers up your thigh to your naked core. made it easy for you, daddy, you grin. he pulls the straps of your dress down, kisses, licks, sucks at your tits and slowly frees his cock, lets you bounce on it just how he likes. that’s it, sweet girl. make daddy feel good, yeah? your eyes are rolling back in your head in pleasure, matty’s fingers digging into your hips as he circles your clit. you come with a wail, matty following a second later.

sweaty and panting, you laugh into matty’s neck. think we need a shower, now. obviously, you fuck in the shower, then matty eats his cum out of you, then you suck him off as thanks. so, all in all, you only really have time for dinner before it gets too dark. it’s lovely, perfect really, matty gazing at you adoringly over the rim of his wine glass (despite your scolding him for ordering red wine and fish.) your italian is… passable, and you apologise profusely for his faux pas.

you go for a moonlit walk along the beach, his hand warm in yours and the sand soft under your feet. you stop for a little kiss by the water, trading murmured i love you’s before wandering back to your cottage… where matty eats you until you literally cannot take it any longer and absolutely soak his face.

the next day, you’re intending on getting an early-morning swim in before you start your day - there’s a practically private beach next to where you’re staying, so you might as well take advantage. matty foils your plans by being so fucking turned on at the sight of you in a red bikini that’s more string than anything that he begs for you. so you have a fun little morning with him at your mercy instead <3

then, you go for a wine tasting, heading home a little tipsy and laden with every bottle you’d even nodded at. you finally get to go for a swim, teasingly splashing matty when he joins you for a bit. not fair, you’re tanned already, you pout. you look so fucking sexy, you add, and he grins wickedly. that grin is fatal, and you end up blowing him in broad daylight on the beach teehee

so yeah it’s a lovely, slutty, sun-filled holiday that you wish would never end <3

[dorky-kawa]

unrealized dream and themes in jjk's ending

For a manga whose core, repeating messages are 'betting on the future' as well as 'people aren't weapons,' the ending of jjk is thematically disillusioning.

I see and understand the interpretation of the ending as uplifting in the sense that even though the cycle of curses continue, even after all the terrible things that happened, jujutsu sorcerers can stand up and continue to forge ahead; and the next generation has stepped forward with adults around that care for them.

At the same time, it is not unfair to read deeper and take a holistic look at the state of jjk world at its end to realize that ultimately, everyone remains cogs in a system that is not really trying for any revolutionary changes.

The thing is, for the students and everyone that survived, this is a good ending from their perspective. For things to keep going, to go back to normal, only that some things are going to be better. For them, they are ending on an optimistic note.

The readers can feel differently because we know about Gojo's dream of resetting jujutsu society with strong and clever allies. The problem with Gojo's plans, however, lies in that he never told any of these strong and clever allies about this dream (except for Ichiji), probably because he never saw himself dying in these plans. The way Gojo spoke about it, it's most likely he saw himself at the forefront leading the charge with his students supporting him. Yet, with him gone, no one can continue his dream for him.

Despite 271 apparently being titled "Continuation of a Dream," in reality, they can only continue a shade of Gojo's dream. The next generation has the inherent goodness and kindness that Gojo always envisioned, but they (and the remaining adults) don't have the entire vision, which was what Gojo had.

Having people with good intentions of changing things for the better without having actual directions for how/what to change results exactly in the state of jujutsu society in the ending: a world with better people leading some slighter better versions of life for themselves, while remaining stuck overall in a system that is minimally changed in the long term in any meaningful way.

That's what chapters 269 and 270 show us. Charles is writing his manga. Noritoshi is happy with his family. Gakuranji tells Utahime everyone is still young.

Hiruguma is resigned to keep living (but he's going to be 'used' or 'worked to the bone as a sorcerer'). NSS is now safe to use, which will save the lives of many sorcerers (but the students are still not free from being 'tools' in this world of sorcery).

All the characters are given small personal victories in the ending, but their endings are not entirely happy either. Still, it's good enough to lull them to be hopeful. It's enough for them to not think about the fact that they still exist in the cycle.

The characters are alive and well and satisfied with where they are at, because without knowing Gojo's dream, this is a good place they are at right now ('it's the best we can hope for' thinking). Gojo and the readers ar the ones who would probably still be unsatisfied with how not enough is being changed, who feel they could set their sights on more. Except Gojo's also happy to stay his airport with his one and only

Finally, I think it also gets us readers that the ending has been portrayed in such blindingly hopeful manner; we don't see any of the characters acknowledging how grim the whole concept is in terms of perpetuating cycles and all. If only they acknowledge it only to utlimately refute it in the name of perseverance and the human expereince of overcoming adversity. Something like Yuuji saying 'we are all born with curses, and we cannot break away from them, but this is how we will live on, even in this cycle of curses.' That would have been more palatable, at least to me (ofc, full leaks aren't out yet).

Also, can I just say that we never saw anyone go north. What does that say about a manga about fighting for change when every single character has chosen to remain who they are?

Final note: I also want to say that this post is just talking about themes and Gojo's dream in jjk's conclusion. I'm not going to even try to touch on character interactions in the ending at the same time.

[katsukisssstorm]

Rockstar!eren x black reader

18+ MDNI!

comments and reblogs are appreciated! follow me too if you want :)

rockstar eren and plug eren live in my head rent free!

Rockstar!eren who thought he could be away from you for 6 months as he toured... he couldnt

Rockstar!eren who books you a flight on the next plane after 3 days of being away from each other.

Rockstar!eren who kisses you deeply in the middle of the airport until you realize where you are and hurry to the car.

Rockstar!eren who tells you over and over again how much he missed you, how sad he's been cause you werent by his side.

Rockstar!eren who lets his hand rest on your thigh, hand getting dangerously close to your aching core as heat pools in your stomach.

Rockstar!eren who drops your bags off the second you step foot in his hotel room, his lips sucking harshly on your neck.

Rockstar!eren who takes his time lapping at your cunt, tongue fucking in and out of your little hole until your legs are shaking and your sobbing.

Rockstar!eren who spends hours between your legs. he's edging you one minute then the next he's trying to see how many times he can get you to cum on his tongue before the room service arrives.

Rockstar!eren who finally sinks three of his fingers in your pussy, one by one until your gushing on his hand, your juices making a mess on the sheets underneath you.

Rockstar!eren who swallows down your whimpers as he lets his angry red tip rub up and down your slit, nudging against your sensitive clit.

Rockstar!eren who fucks you all night, he goes from slow and deep to fast and hard, your neck and chest covered in dark hickeys, but eren isnt doing much better.

Rockstar!eren who cant wipe the smile off his face the next day when his stylist is cursing him out for all the hickeys that litter his neck, knowing its gonna be a bitch to try to cover up

Rockstar!eren who sends a wink in your direction as you stand backstage, singing along to every song he plays.

Rockstar!eren who has you on your knees in his dressing room during one of the breaks, a heavy hand resting on the back of your head as he roughly fucks you face, wiping away the tears that gather at your lash line

Rockstar!eren who sticks his ringed fingers in your mouth, watching as drool pools in the corner of your lips and drips down the side of your mouth.

Rockstar!eren who takes you back to his hotel room to do it all over again until tomorrow when you guys will be on the road until you get to the next city.

[toosaltyforacookie]

He knows exactly what this looks like to anyone outside of his brain. Hell, he knows what it looks like because he learned it from watching Bobby and Athena keep each other stable in the worst of situations. You couldn't find better teachers to observe and absorb without having to pry into their personal lives. So screw him for taking notes on each lesson offered to him with glitter pens and silly stickers that represent each important person in his life.

But fuck does loving someone hurt.

If he has to stand around and listen to one more conversation about Eddie leaving for El Paso Buck swears to anything willing to listen that he's going to tear out his hair one follicle at a time. His brain hasn't stopped replaying the meeting with the realtor, or the small smile on Eddie's face as they both jokingly argued over the benefits of an above or below ground pool. Buck really wishes he hadn't flipped that tablet over to try and find out what stupid things his best friend was watching. Or bet yet, he should've just gone to pick up the ingredients he used up at his place to avoid the interaction as a whole and live with his head buried in the sand for just a little bit longer.

Buck wishes he didn't have to love his best friend so much that he'd support him in finding his joy if it meant leaving him behind. But Bobby and Athena had taught him too well that true love meant making sacrifices for each other. And if he was the one making those sacrifices every time? He'd do it over and over again without changing a thing just to see Eddie feel true joy.

A rhythmic buzzing pulls Buck from his thoughts and he lifts his phone to his ear without thinking.

"Go for Buckley!"

"Hey Buck." The sound of Eddie's voice instantly lifts his spirits from their pit of boredom induced spiraling.

"What's up Eds? Do you already miss me?" He can make jokes, that's a normal thing they do. Everything is so normal right now so that has to be the perfect response.

A hearty chuckle is the only response for a few moments before Eddie clears his throat. "Our shift ended 10 hours ago, I'm not that desperate. I was uh, actually calling to ask a favor."

"Anything! I'm your go to guy!"

"Would you mind driving me to the airport next weekend?"

Buck is now absolutely certain that there are sacrifices he's going to regret with every fiber of his being. Giving too much of yourself in offerings is actually a bad thing and he really should stop now before it becomes an addiction. He needs to say no in a way that doesn't fill Eddie in on all the racing thoughts running through his head right now. His best friend will understand if he says no, Uber exists and they've both used it almost hundreds of times now.

"Yeah of course, you know I'd always help you out!" Buck's voice stumbles on the first bit before smoothing out to sound nonchalant.

Holy fuck someone kill him now to stop his mouth from running him off a cliff face first. Buck really needs to stop watching others around him showing love to their partners, his notes were now becoming a jumbled mess laughing in his face while he tries and fails to keep himself together.

"You're the best Buck, really. I appreciate everything you've done to help me during this move. I honestly don't know what I would've done without." Eddie lets out a deep breath and Buck can easily imagine the smile of relief he has on.

"I know without you I'm going to fall apart, and it hurts me to the core that I'll ever have to know the answer to that question." Buck's heart screams at him to speak those words through the static between them but he'll never reveal his magician's secrets now that he's in too deep.

"I won't let you know." He answers instead.

And that's the truth. Eddie might be leaving him but he'll never stop loving his best friend to let him know what it feels like to do anything alone ever again.

Maybe he shouldn't have fallen in love in the first place.

[filmbyjy]

TWITTER SUCKS! > sixteen! let me sniff [written]

synopsis > who knew you could become famous overnight for paying $8 for a single blue checkmark? however, it does come with consequences…what happens when the actual BELIFT Lab comes knocking at your door. all because you simply impersonated your bias.

masterlist | previous | next

WORD COUNT: 0.9K words

WARNINGS: I do mention sex here like a couple of times but they are just for shits and giggles. I could never write smut (though JAM OUT was a whole complete different level)

a/n: holy shit, first written chapter of the series😮 ALSO!! SELAMAT HARI RAYA TO MY MUSLIM FOLLOWERS🫶🏻🫶🏻 time to get your raya duit and spend it on enha😍

everything was fine. well at least what heeseung thought, he didn’t know that the staff he was practically close with was mean to the other members. until they told him of course.

he knew this staff was pretty quote on quote ‘touchy’ but heeseung never thought she was crazy. however, if the boys say she’s insane then it must be true. heeseung could trust the boys way more than her, after all she just recently started working with their team.

— placing this in case read more messes up —

“hyung, just watch and observe her for a couple of weeks. you’ll notice how mean she is with sunoo and sunghoon.” jay says.

and it’s what heeseung did. he observed her and he was definitely not surprised. jay always knew how to tell the truth, he was also never a great liar. there was also something in particular she does which ticks heeseung off. it was the way she handled things, especially with fans.

it was like those bodyguards at airports. who push those ‘fans’ when they were about to enter the waiting area. the only difference is the ENGENEs that they met were really nice and respectful, she was not. she had insist the ENGENEs weren’t allowed to photograph any of them. which seems fair since it was a private schedule but heeseung felt like it was unnecessary. the fans weren’t even asking for a photograph, they were simply shocked to see the boys and said hi.

“I get what you mean, she’s crazy.” heeseung says. all 7 of the boys were sprawled in the living room. ni-ki and jake were playing the PS5.

“I think she purposely approached HYBE to get a job and be close to heeseung hyung. she sees me and sunghoon hyung as a threat because she knows that we don’t fuck with her.” sunoo rolls his eyes.

“well, she’s creepy. how old was she again?”

“hyung’s age?” jake says. he yells after because ni-ki’s kart had pushed his to the side. “YAH! NISHIMURA I WAS WINNING.”

“too bad, jake hyung.” ni-ki sticks out his tongue, teasing the boy.

“she’s like one of the youngest staff member on our team. she’s definitely trying to seduce hyung.” jungwon says.

“the attempt isn’t subtle at all. we literally see her undressing heeseung with her eyes.” sunghoon complains. heeseung gasps before covering his body up as if he could imagine her eyes.

“she did that?”

“oh hyung, if only you weren’t oblivious. yes, she did undress you with her eyes.” sunghoon says.

“she literally slowly panned her eyes up and down your body. she looked like a total pervert.” jake gags.

“fuck, what do we do?”

“hmm, maybe we could…lowkey record her? use the en-core camera and like angle ourselves to where she is sort of seen but also off-camera so they won’t blur out her face.” jungwon says.

“won, you are a genius.” jake says.

“oh I know.” jungwon smirks. jay playfully rolls his eyes.

“anyways, are you going to confess to (name) noona?” sunoo tilts his head. he prettily flutters his eyes whilst cupping his face. heeseung shakes his head.

“I don’t like (name) like that. we are just flirting for fun, besides i can’t just risk my career like that.”

“then what’s with all the ‘god, she’s beautiful’ or ‘i wish I could date her’ muttered under your breath, hyung?”

“i just-I don’t think it would be appropriate for me to fall in love.”

“so you became a simp? that still shows you have feelings for her.” sunghoon says.

“I don’t know what love is.” heeseung huffs.

“booooo, for someone who flirts with ENGENEs all the time. you suck at realising your feelings.” jay grumbles.

“you are like jay hyung. a virgin.” jungwon says.

“man, I have sex.” jay folds his arms.

jake snorts, “with what? your right hand? that’s not sex.”

“hyung, ni-ki is right there.” jungwon scolds.

“it’s true though, what bitches is jay pulling.” sunghoon shrugs.

“your mom.” jay says.

“sorry but my mom has taste. reason why, she and my dad created me. the hot sexy bitch I am.” sunghoon flips his hair.

it went dead silent and sunghoon rolls his eyes. “I make the face of the group. you should be thankful for my visuals.”

“heeseung hyung is the face of the group but sure, we thank you for your visuals.” sunoo says.

“only sunoo has my back. you guys are fake as fuck.” sunghoon huffs.

>> next day >>

as per usual, the boys had their schedule. their plan had already initiated. today, jay was their videographer.

“heeseung, it’s time for your makeup.” heeseung was about to go but sunoo decided to put on an act knowing jay was already recording.

“jieun noona, could you help sew my clothes? it seems like there is a tear in the clothes.” sunoo says. jieun rolls her eyes.

“there are other stylists around, can’t you ask them? I have to prioritise heeseung first.”

“the other stylists are busy with the other members-”

“I don’t care, go find another stylist.” she pushes sunoo away. sunoo rolls his eyes once he turns his head away, jay was there to film everything. jay knew ENGENEs could trust sunoo’s judgement. he was always right when it came to feeling a person’s character.

another opportunity rises after the performance, this time jake records.

“heeseung, come here. you must be smelling horrible.”

“uh, yeah. I just finished a performing.” heeseung says, he could feel the awkwardness and he hated it.

she sniffs heeseung and sighs, “I knew it. come on, let’s get you cologne or something. you smell like sweat.” jake gasps behind the camera. jungwon watching in horror.

“nah, she’s foul for that.” sunghoon says.

“heeseung hyung must feel so bad now.” ni-ki pouts.

“you smell too ni-ki.” jake says. ni-ki shoves jake.

that’s all before jake shoves ni-ki and they start play fighting. like puppies.

series taglist[open]: @lovers-szn @shiguresohmas @moonshoon @byunappetit @strvlveera @rikisly @4lythe @lalalalawon @beansworldsstuff @enhastolemyheart @jaehaki @shinsou-rii @jeanbob @sxftiell @renchai @nyfwyeonjun @invusblog @lhees01 @donghyckl @enhafika @dimplewonie @foxsunoo @luv2lia @lvrjjun @curly-fr13s @bubblytaetae @raikea10 @ce1ight @luvlee1313 @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs @soobisrealgfnotfake @justkatehere @l0tisflower @jseobsky @haerinism @liliansun @kyanmeai @nobodyshallenter @faeryhee @pkjay @mlink64 @luxurystark-jackson @aleombre @yenqa @heestrawberries @soaen @ckline35 @http-gyu @climbingmandevillas @stopeatread @y4wnjunz @aetherlol @whippedforbeomgyu @elisabeth-02 @tlnyjoong

(to be added please send an ask or click here)

[lululandd]

rabid; (ii.)

pairing: simon ‘ghost’ riley x gn!reader

word count: 895

warnings: unhinged topics, blasphemy, ghost starting to feel things

note: sadly this is hinged (maybe if ideas come the next one will be unhinged >:3) also on AO3

summary: soap couldn’t be more blatantly listening in, lowering the telly’s volume to hear them better.

part i. | part ii. | part iii. | part iv.

Johnny had mentioned he wanted to see the quiet little village where his home is and Simon thinks it’s time the Scot knows where he lives. He had met Johnny’s extended family, and as much as he didn’t want to admit it, it warms his little black heart when he mentions the little nephews and nieces asking about him and whether he will be making an appearance that year.

He didn’t have time to clean and prepare for Johnny’s arrival so they both had to do chores. The Scot laughed about how mundane and domestic this is while waggling his eyebrows,

“Come on LT, you know this shite is more manageable with someone in your life.”

“Shut the fuck up Johnny.”

It was nearing afternoon and he had completely forgotten about his neighbour until he heard them greeting the invisible people and started telling them about their day. Soap couldn’t be more blatantly listening in, lowering the telly’s volume to hear them better. It was pretty mundane as they just got started, but as the night went on Soap was keen on listening even further, sometimes shushing him when he tried to talk. His gloved hand came up as he turned his head to him with the widest grin on his face. Ghost had guessed Johnny almost always lived with his family and never had to worry about thin walls and nosy neighbours from all the fun he’s having right now.

It was all benign conversation so far, asking about people’s days, people’s lives, and sometimes comments about things he doesn’t understand. But if he knows his neighbour, it always starts off that way before their mind wanders to unimaginable places. Places he would not like to visit, but would love to hear about.

“So we’ve all heard of anal prolapse, right?” Your voice came clearly, everything else in the flat muted by Soap, including him.

What is your fixation with anal, seriously.

A cough erupts from Johnny's throat, caught off guard by the objectionable question asked in the most innocuous way. 

They continued listening in and Simon couldn’t suppress his grin to what question or statement awaits them next. “What about a urethra prolapse, does that exist?”

Simon wasn’t fast enough to warn Johnny not to say anything, so when the Scot half yelled “Oi, what tae fuck?!” It rang clear through both flats. There were no other sounds in the air as his neighbour heard Johnny’s clamour.

A few moments passed before a faint little ‘sorry’ floated through the air between them. He doesn’t know it yet but it was the end of hearing his neighbour. His teammate had turned the telly back on, and they were back to talking again. Simon hadn’t thought about how quiet his neighbour had been until one night–Johnny wanted to stay for a full week at his place–when he was alone in the apartment, he noticed the absence of your voice. He checked his watch, this was usually the time you would start talking.

He had tried so hard not to show his friend that this event bothered him, even though it did trouble him to his core that his neighbour would shut the fuck up immediately like that. It continued that way, quiet and hushed conversations that he couldn't listen to. He swears as soon as Johnny goes back to his own place he’ll apologise to them. First thing he’ll do. Cross his heart.

The moment Soap turned his back on him at the airport, he was gone. Simon swore he hit every red light from the airport back to his flat. It was the most excruciating car ride of his life, second to his escape from the Shadows back in Las Almas. 

Your apartment seemed empty with nary any sound coming from inside, but he sees movement from under the door that suggests otherwise. He knocked on the door and didn’t know he had set expectations for himself until the door was open and he felt… disappointment. The chain wasn’t even undone, he can only see a little part of their face.

“Sorry, I was really trying to keep it quiet.” You talked quietly, your words gentle, bordering emotionless. It sounds so different from the usual excitement he’s used to.

He rubs his face, feeling a pressure on his chest that does not feel far removed from guilt.

“No you were fine, I apologise for my friend’s behaviour. I like listening to you talk and would love to hear you again.”

He sees you avoiding his eyes as you nod, “Okay, thanks.”

Even though you did sound louder than when Johnny was around, he could tell you were still holding back; he had to strain his hearing to even catch a glimpse of what you’re talking about and couldn’t help but feel annoyed at Johnny for unnecessarily speaking up. Yes, they banter all the time and he would never be offended but these are civilians and people he had never met before, so he can’t just act as if he knows them and think there would only be positive reactions from people.

He was about to resign that his neighbour would never speak up again until one night he hears; half intelligible from laughter,

“Was Jesus circumcised?”

There we go.

He feels himself tip towards that warm place inside him that he rarely goes to.

[ineffable-opinions]

Little Hearts - Coming Out, Coming Home

[updated | latest version]

This movie is now available on YouTube.

സമർപ്പണം - ക്വീർ മലയാളികൾക്ക്.

This week saw a lot of very interesting discussion about Indian queer media (compilation by @starryalpacasstuff). It coinciding with 13th edition of Kerala Queer Pride 2024 is so serendipitous.

I had drafted this Little Hearts (2024) appreciation post with the aim to finalize it before Kollavarsham New Year but did not get around to doing so. I wanted to take part in the current conversation. So, I am posting it now. I intent to discuss Indian BL: Sting of Lavender and Arotpa Pirang (The Hidden Tears) as well as movies like Kaathal – The Core, Moothon and Ardhanaari (2012) in the future.

Little Hearts (2024) is a Malayalam-language comedy movie available for streaming on Amazon Prime. (CW: heterosexism; PSA: Hema Committee Report) It's not a surprisingly impressive movie by any measure but I had a very nice time watching it. It was one of the best comedies of this year for me. And it tackles coming out in an interesting manner.

contains spoilers

Plot

(names might be spelled differently in the subtitles.)

The movie is set in a village in a high-range region of Kerala. We follow the main character Sibi through his journey, navigating 3 different relationships and their implication on his beloved people. The movie is pretty straightforward in its approach. At the outset, we are introduced to the romantic relationship – the one between Sibi’s father, Baby, and Baby’s childhood sweetheart, Cecily who was deserted by her husband Joey. She has a teenage daughter who doesn't look at their romance favorably. That’s the first hurdle. The other hurdle to their relationship is Cecily’s brother Papan and his feud with Baby. The feud and Sibi’s involvement make for some really fun moments throughout the movie.

The next romantic relationship involves Sibi and his feudal landlord’s daughter. Sibi and his father work in the cardamom estate owned by Johnson. Sibi’s family and Johnson’s basically have a very good relationship. Sibi grew up with Johnson’s kids, calls Johnson "papa" and Anitha (Johnson’s wife) "mummy", and spends a considerable amount of time at their house. Their families are practically one as seen from them breaking bread together on Maundy Thursday – an intimate tradition for those Nasrani folk.

However, there is clear class disparity. Sibi lives in a much smaller house and when dismissed from work, the class difference only becomes clearer.

What gets things moving is Shosha rejecting a proposal for an arranged marriage by lying that she is in a relationship with Sibi.

Sibi, clearly demiromantic, is surprised initially when she starts wooing him but eventually he falls for her. This branded pair’s romance didn’t work as well as it did in RDX (2023) but at least this time around they got their happy ending (a rarity in Malayalam romances).

The queer sub-plot arrives when Johnson’s firstborn, Sharon, returns home after a long while. While his parents prepare to arrange his marriage, Sharon confides in Sibi that he's actually getting married next month to his foreigner partner. The only thing Sibi enquires about is if Sharon’s partner belongs to the same community as himself (Catholic). When he gives a positive reply, Sibi asks him to invite his partner over so that Sibi can present the news to Johnson and Anitha on Sharon’s behalf. At the airport, Sharon welcomes his boyfriend Nathan and Sibi is shocked.

Agitated, Sibi is rude towards Sharon initially. However, he agrees to take Nathan and Sharon to visit tourist spots in exchange for Sharon meeting the woman his parents are trying to arrange his wedding with. During their excursion, Sibi warms up to their relationship while watching them interact. He also puts in effort to learn about queer people.

As promised Sharon meets the girl and rejects her respectfully. Nathan grows uneasy as Sharon drags his feet. Their relationship strains. Sharon’s mom notices but isn’t sure about what’s going on. Sibi’s efforts to talk to Johnson are unsuccessful. Hopeless, Sharon asks Nathan to leave by himself as he needs more time. Nathan asks Sibi to take care of Sharon and returns.

Anitha learns from Sibi about Nathan’s relationship with Sharon and, from her Johnson. Unable to process this information, Johnson consults Baby. Drunk out of his wits, Baby not only scolds Johnson for not accepting Sharon but also reveals the love affair between Sibi and Shosha. They fight and Johnson hits Sibi and forbids both son and dad from entering either his house or his land. Moreover, Sibi and Shosha’s relationship takes a turn for the worse as their stubborn attitudes worsen minor conflicts between them. 

Right when Sibi with the vicar’s intervention gets Cecily’s daughter's approval for their parent’s relationship, Joey appears. Turns out Joey held a grudge against his brother-in-law, Papan, who had hurt and humiliated him. Joey exacts revenge by whipping and stabbing Papan during the Way of Cross performance on Good Friday. Finally divorced, Cecily can finally move on and marry Baby.

While Shosha tries to be the bridge between her father and her brother, she fails to do so for her relationship with Sibi. Sharon calls her out. The movie ends with Baby and Sibi getting married and Sharon and Nathan joining them on a video call after the ceremony.

Analysis

The predominant narrative of “coming out” is built on a particular kind of queer experience and geography, which is usually from the standpoint of white, middle-class, urban U.S. citizenship.

Shuzhen Huang & Daniel C. Brouwer (2018) Coming out, coming home, coming with: Models of queer sexuality in contemporary China

Nathan is an upper-class, white, Christian man with an accepting family emblematic of the Western take on queerness we all are familiar with. Sharon, on the other hand, is from this little agricultural village in Kerala where everyone knows everyone else and queerness does not get accepted and protected the way it does in the West. That’s why he had migrated. That’s why he did not visit more often. His desires are mediated by his circumstances. Leaving home is a decision that a lot of queer people living in villages like his adopt, whether it is to urban regions within the nation or abroad. Queer migration is a very common phenomenon in India and I hope to discuss it further in relation to other movies such as Moothon and Sancharam.

Migration is expected to offer queer individuals distance from the daily pressures of heteronormativity and cis-heteropatriarchy. It can secure them better employment opportunities, higher incomes, and improved standard of living and savings that would help them support themselves (and their parents) in their old age in the absence of offspring and substantial social security benefits. It can also provide them with relative anonymity to explore their sexuality, improved chances of finding partners, friends, and other queer folk in general whom they can support and be supported by.

Sharon choosing to introduce Nathan to his family through Sibi might come off as strange, but that’s very much not the case. Arranged marriages are the norm in Kerala. Even if your marriage is not arranged via match-makers (and increasingly via dedicated websites), it is not unusual for the couple to get their parents to ‘arrange’ their love marriage on their behalf. Marriages are grand affairs, with creation and merging of families, transfer of different sorts of wealth and capital, a well-mediated social project where familism rather than individualism dominates, with relatives and neighbors having a say in everything.  

Shane Nigam, the actor who played Sibi, has other movies in which he does the exact same role for heterosexual couples. In RDX, he is tasked with presenting his brother’s relationship with his future sister-in-law to his father and getting his father’s approval.

In Kumbalangi Nights, Shane's character has to convince his brother to bring up the matter of his marriage with his girlfriend’s brother-in-law in the absence of their parents.

While cis-heterosexual pairings enjoy better acceptance at some level compared to others, that acceptance is conditional. India more broadly and Kerala specifically has a fairly long-standing tradition of “marrying” within one’s caste and creed. (There were other not-exactly conjugal ties in Kerala like sambandam that were inter-caste.) Exogamy is strongly discouraged and punished through deprivation of essential social capital and in extreme cases through honor killings. It is in this context that Sibi asks Sharon if the one Sharon is going to marry belongs to their community – they are Nasrani Catholics. When Sharon affirms that although his partner is a foreigner but catholic, Sibi is relieved (in a very comphet way which he regrets soon enough).

Sibi, in a heterosexist outburst, uses “kundan” intending to hurt Sharon. Sibi is a stand-in for most Malayali folk whose understanding of queerness, is rooted in local forms of expression of sexuality. While married folk are expected to fall in love and stay faithful and carry on the bloodline, that is only the intention for and not the basis of marriages. Sexuality, especially non-heterosexuality, leading to marriages and households is a fairly unusual concept. Please keep in mind that even the idea of a household being one that had its basis in marriage is fairly new. Till the 20th century, a normal Nair (a community in Kerala) household (tharavaadu) meant sisters and brothers living with the sisters' children, and these children's fathers would continue to live with their own sisters.

Sexuality that made one “kundan” lie outside the conjugal sphere if not for marriage equality activism and movements seeking legalization of non-monogamous kinship arrangements. I have discussed this form of male-male sexuality, the term kundan and its connection with BL, in my post on Kubi and Gohatto.

Sibi struggles with the task Sharon entrusted him with. He has to learn about queer people (he is seen browsing the internet and watching videos to learn), understand the couple he is expected to introduce, and present it in a manner that would not spook Sharon’s parents (for example, the conversation about food preferences) and would instead make them root for their son. Sibi’s hesitation costs the couple time and drives a wedge between them that widens enough to tear their relationship apart.

Sharon’s mother is the first one to learn of his relationship with Nathan. She responds in a way that would be best explained by the Chinese phrase “rugui” (entering the closet) which refers to the initial and depressive stage [many Asian] parents enter upon learning about their child’s queerness. It is a painful psychological state consisting of shock, anger, grief, disbelief, and self-blame. These parents then must work their way back to a balanced state.

It is clear that she was suspecting and that is why she had insisted on speaking to Sibi at the church. After learning the truth, she chooses to walk back home and breaks down while hugging her son, upon finally realizing the pain he has been in all this time and the reason behind the pain.

Sharon’s father learns the truth from his wife. The second stage of his reaction is what the Chinese call “jiating chugui” (familial coming-out) wherein a parent seeks moral support from someone he trusts. However, his decision to confide in Baby backfires.

Drunk out of his wits, Baby reprimands Johnson for hesitating to accept his son. Interestingly, Baby uses a lot of slang popular on the internet among Malayali folk online including those relating to political correctness and progressive thinking. Baby is disingenuous since he is not free from heterosexist bias himself. However, learning that Baby and Sibi have been keeping a bunch of secrets from him breaks Johnson who was already emotionally vulnerable. He lashes out at Baby and Sibi as well as his son, whom he prevents from leaving the country by withholding his passport.

Shosha, Sharon’s sister is upset with Sibi for hiding about Sharon’s relationship. However, she is able to offer the good counsel that Johnson had fruitlessly sought in Baby. Sharon and Johnson renew their bond over alcohol. Finally, at peace, Sharon is able to set Shosha straight too.  

There has been criticism that the movie failed to do justice to the queer theme by focusing uneven amounts of energy on heterosexual couples. But, I think Little Hearts did a good job of upsetting the conventional idea that heterosexual relationships are automatically normative and easily accepted. Even with heterosexual relationships being intra-caste, class is a powerful enough divide to try and force couples apart through familial/societal disapproval (from Papan against Baby and Johnson against Sibi). Consider the fact that Kerala is yet to have an on-screen inter-caste heterosexual couple have their happy ending. By calling into question what can be considered queer in Malayali society, the movie manages to critically examine the emergent theme of Christian Nasrani familialism.

-

notes:

Hema Committee report - Wikipedia

Baburaj, the actor who played Baby, is one of the post-report accused.

2. Shine Tom Chacko previously played a queer character in the 2022 action thriller Bheeshma Parvam.

[morlock-holmes]

I've been chewing on this story from New York Magazine, whose financial advice columnist just got scammed out of $50 large by a group of scumbags.

The reactions have been sort of divided between vicious mockery and "Anybody can fall victim to scams on a bad day" and I find myself somewhere ambivalently in the middle.

How can I say this... I think I would need to be having a much worse day than this woman was in order to fall for a scam like this. In particular, it really seems like a financial advice columnist ought to have a much more solid confidence about the fact that enormous personal financial transactions like this don't ever need to happen in the span of a single phone call over a few hours.

But I don't agree with the attitude of "Come on, this is what happens when you're gullible" because, honestly I think that when people start believing that on a big scale that scams like this become easier to pull, rather than harder.

This particular scam is, I think, much easier to pull on people who are paranoid about the trustworthiness of institutions and feel that we live in a world where gullible people are rapidly and harshly punished.

One thing you'll see throughout the article is that the scammers will say something authoritative, and Cowles won't really know if it's true or not:

“I completely understand,” he said calmly. He told me to go to the FTC home page and look up the main phone number. “Now hang up the phone, and I will call you from that number right now.” I did as he said. The FTC number flashed on my screen, and I picked up. “How do I know you’re not just spoofing this?” I asked. “It’s a government number,” he said, almost indignant. “It cannot be spoofed.” I wasn’t sure if this was true and tried Googling it, but Michael was already onto his next point.

Or

My head swam. I Googled my name along with “warrant” and “money laundering,” but nothing came up. Were arrest warrants public? I wasn’t sure.

Or

 I was embarrassed, like I’d left my fly unzipped. How could I have been so thoughtless? But also — didn’t everyone use the airport Wi-Fi?

or

I knew I should probably talk to a lawyer or maybe call the police, though I was doubtful that they would help. What was I going to say — “My identity was stolen, and I think I’m somehow in danger”? I had no proof.

Here's the core of the scam, where you're hooked or not:

“If you talk to an attorney, I cannot help you anymore,” Michael said sternly. “You will be considered noncooperative. Your home will be raided, and your assets will be seized. You may be arrested. It’s your choice.” This seemed ludicrous. I pictured officers tramping in, taking my laptop, going through our bookshelves, questioning our neighbors, scaring my son. It was a nonstarter. “Can I just come to your office and sort this out in person?” I said. “It’s getting late, and I need to take my son trick-or-treating soon.” “My office is in Langley,” he said. “We don’t have enough time. We need to act immediately. I’m going to talk you through the process. It’s going to sound crazy, but we must follow protocol if we’re going to catch the people behind this.”

The scammer in this script is trying to get you to have two feelings, the first is "I don't understand what's going on" and the second is, "If I act without understanding what's going on something really terrible will happen to me."

The person who thinks, "Gullible and ignorant people get in lots of trouble because of their own ignorance, I can't let that happen, even though I'm confused" is far more likely to buy into the scammer's threats of dire consequences and actually get scammed.

This scam script actually relies on the mark believing that it's very dangerous to be gullible or ignorant, that doing so will get them into trouble. But since they are also convinced that they don't have the information that would allow them to make a good decision, they cede decision-making power to the scammer.

Instead, it's the person who thinks, "This feels like a scam. I could be totally wrong about that, but that's okay, being wrong this way and acting on it can't do me any harm" who hangs up on the scammer, calls an official government number, and finds out that they're being scammed.

When people live in a state where they reflexively mistrust institutions, and feel that acting from a place of ignorance or confusion is likely to get them into really big trouble that they can't get out of, I really think it becomes easier to scam people this way, not harder.

[ladylooch]

Loving & Leaving- Part 5

Visit the series page here.

A/N: I should have said this earlier in the series, but I am aware Nico and Timo do not live close to each other in Switzerland. However, for this work of fiction, we gonna pretend. I really love these two. OMG, @ Emma finally giving in and handing us all the fluff we deserve. Only one more part after this 😩. Appreciate your love!

Word Count: 4.1k

Warnings: SMUT 18+ Content (multiple times, blesssss), graphic descriptions of birth (forgive any inconsistencies), pregnancy, swearing.

“Babe.” I moan to Timo from where his head has disappeared beyond my bump and between my legs. His tongue is generous this morning, lapping and tasting me like I’m actually his breakfast. “Yeah.” I sigh, eyes closing shut as my core shakes, tightening my full belly.

It’s been a slow build morning. He started with sensual touches on my hip, lips pressing along my shoulder blade until his hands snuck up my shirt, rubbing at our growing baby. From there, his fingers glazed along my breasts, stroking and teasing my sensitive nipples until my hips bucked back into him, trembling, desperate.

His playing continued. He took his time pulling my pajama pants off, kissing his way up my left leg then down my right, sucking along every millimeter of my stretched and swollen body. A sound I didn’t recognize fell from my lips when his first tongue stroke hit my clit. His grin was sinister, teeth helping suck my folds between his lips hungrily. 

I reach wildly by my hip to touch any part of him. I can’t thread my fingers in his hair. It’s too hard to reach with our baby in the way. Timo laces our fingers together instead. I squeeze them as my orgasm grips me. He slowly backs his pressure off, giving gentle slurps and laps as I dissolve into the pillows.

“You were right.” I murmur when I can, staring at the ceiling. “That was a good distraction.” Timo smiles against my belly, pressing soft kisses where little feet move. “How am I going to live without you?” I whisper. 

“You’ll have part of me.” He jiggles our son by digging his fingers into my belly.

“Not the same.” I mumble, trying to roll onto my right hip as he craws up to lay next to me. His hand grips my other hip to pull me the whole way. He slides closer, fingers weaving through my hair to hold my head.

“We’ll talk every day.” He says against my lips. I close my eyes, leaning into the kiss. It’s like stepping into a warm shower after a cold day, full of tingly skin and appreciated comfort.

Today, I’m 29 weeks pregnant. 

Because of that, our care team in New Jersey told me this week that it is time for me to fly home. The Devils are making a long, playoff push which means Timo and I will need to be separated until they win the Stanley Cup or lose. I could stay. But, in our early talks, it became important for us to have our baby in Switzerland. Most Swiss NHL players don’t get this choice and we feel grateful to welcome our baby into the world where we entered too. A Swiss birth certificate- no stress of dual citizenship hovering over our heads with multiple documents for the rest of his life. 

At this point in my pregnancy, I can’t stay here and have our baby in Switzerland.

“Here.” Timo hands me my red passport book at the airport later. We smile at each other, remembering when I surrendered it to him after returning in January. He had made a big show of putting it in the safe in his closet. “Gotta lock this up, so you can’t leave without telling me.” But later that night, he slid the combination to me on a post-it. “All joking aside, you can leave whenever or if you want.”

Now that it’s time for me to do so, I really don’t want to.

Dread fills me as I wait outside the car for Timo to pull my two suitcases out of the trunk of Nico’s car. My bottom lip trembles, forcing my eyes shut. Tears build behind my lids, coating my lashes. A noise falls from my mouth. I clasp my hand over it as Timo turns to look at me.

“Babe.” He sighs, squeezing my fingers.

“I got the rest.” Nico assures him, taking over the luggage so Timo can wrap me in his arms. I immediately sob into his chest. 

“I love you.” He says into my hair. “I know it’s hard.” He rocks us together as I cry, gripping his shirt in tight fists on his back.

“I don’t want to let go.” I whisper. When I tilt my face to his, he presses a deep, consuming kiss on my lips.

“Me either. It’s just for now. I’ll be home as soon as I can.” He nuzzles his nose into my wet cheek. “Be brave, baby. Take care of yourself and our son.” He leans down, pressing a long, tender kiss to my bump. “I love you. Both of you.” He rubs my back as I wipe tears from my face. His lips press longingly into my hair, discomfort obvious on his features.

“We love you.” I hiccup before taking a steadying breath. I need to keep it a little bit together here.

Nico is next.

“Don’t forget, you’re growing a future number 1 overall draft pick in there.” He jokes before wrapping me into a tight hug. “I love you. I’ll take care of your other boy here.”

“Love you.”

Timo gives me one more hug and a long, lingering smooch that makes my little brother shift uncomfortably from foot to foot. Our fingers stay laced together until they can’t anymore. I feel empty as my feet shuffle me towards the line with a vice-like grip on my red passport.

How did I ever leave him the times before this?

Timo follows me along the outside of the security line, step for step, until I disappear behind the glass.

- - - 

“You should take a break.” Rhea says to me at the end of May. I am leaning against the bar at the outdoor event we are presenting for a high-end technology firm. It’s outdoors on a gorgeous roof top overlooking Lake Constance.

“I’m fine.” I insist to her, ignoring the swelling I can feel in my ankles. The straps of my wedges are cutting deep grooves into my feet. If I was in a truthful mood, I would admit that I am not feeling great today.

“I’m the boss now.” She quips at me. “Go. Take. A. Break.”

“We are co-partners.” I shake my head at her. Rhea becoming a partner was a long-term goal that my pregnancy rushed forward. She has kept the business thriving while I lived in New Jersey with Timo the first few months of the year. I’m grateful for her support and partnership in this next chapter.

“It still means I get to tell you what to do… half of the time. Seriously. Things are going well. Go sit down. Get some water. Maybe a snack for this guy.” She pats my belly and strolls away to chat with the catering supervisor.

I take her advice, easing into a chair off to the side, hidden from the guests. My hand strokes my belly where the baby kicks against one of my organs.

“Settle.” I muse. “Let’s call daddy quick.”

I press his name on my phone, bringing the speaker to my mouth as I scratch a newly forming stretch mark on the side of my hip. The phone rings and rings with no answer. I furrow my brows then find myself grinning at the sound of Timo’s voicemail greeting.

“Hi Timo Meier, it’s your baby mama. I have a complaint about our son and his rib kicking again.” I chuckle, then sigh. “Well, you’re busy cleaning or packing or dancing with drunk cats I’m sure. Call me when you can. We love you.” I click end, tossing my phone onto the little side table to my right.

Right now, things are lonely here. Soon, that will change; Timo will be home with me and our son. He’ll hold me and rub my swollen feet and get me through these last few, uncomfortable months of pregnancy. It’s unfortunate that he’ll be returning without a cup. But a loss in the Eastern Conference Finals is still a better result than the prior year. He’s close to greatness. Maybe next year, our son and I can witness it together. 

A cool breeze blows the strands of my brown hair about. I close my eyes, focusing in on the sweet smells of summer, pushing into my belly to adjust the baby’s foot moving against my ribs again. 

“You’re a little bit of a handful these days.” I murmur down to my belly. I smooth my dress out, watching as it bounces with the wild movements of the baby spinning about. “Ow.” I mutter, then push myself back up into a standing position. This helps move him lower and out of my ribs. So much for sitting.

Ding

I pull my phone up to look at the text from Timo.

How do you sound so beautiful and I can’t even see you?? Can’t talk right now, drunk cats and all 😉. I’ll try to catch you before you go to sleep. Miss you two. Love you more.

Please call. Wake me, I don’t care. I miss you a lot today.

Just you?

Okay, we 🙄

That’s better. Two 😘😘 for my sass queen and my buddy. Gotta go!

To where, I’m not sure. I want to ask but ultimately don’t.

I find out later when the door to our bedroom creeks open, jolting me out of a deep sleep.

“Sorry, baby.” I hear Timo say. It takes a moment for me to register his voice is in the room with me. When I feel his large hand cupping my baby bump, I know it’s real. “ Hi beautiful.” He presses his lips to mine. They curl into a smile under his mouth.

“You’re home.” I say, surprised. The Devils just lost three days ago. He shouldn’t be halfway across the world already.

“Yeah. Skipped out on everything to get here with you. I’ve missed too much.”

“I’m okay with that.”

“Look at you.. finally in this bed.” He chuckles. I’ve never been to his place in Switzerland before. It was strange coming here for the first time without him. The neighbors definitely gave me looks.

“Exactly how you pictured it?” I stick my tongue out at him.

“Yeah.” He laughs, stroking our son. “I saw the nursery.”

“Do you like it?”

“Yeah. It’s perfect. You did such a good job.” His lips press against mine again. His hand comes to the small of my back, pulling me closer to him. My bump presses into his hips where I can feel him hard against me.

“Eight months pregnant and you’re still into me?”

“Fucking obsessed.” He murmurs. “Flew coach internationally just to get between these thighs.”

“Please… Make love to me in this bed.” I say against his lips, moving my tongue into his mouth. He grins into our kiss.

“You should know I used to cum at the mere thought of you in these sheets.” He admits.

“Ugh, that is hot.” I moan, lifting my hips slightly so he can pull my pajama shorts off.

“Always my best work too.” He insists, eyes darkening as my bare breasts spring loose from my bra. “Jesus, baby. These things are… massive.” He groans as he palms them. The edges of them now flow outside of his large hands. His skin against my nipples is invigorating. He releases both breasts, bringing his mouth down. He places open mouth kisses all along the warm skin until he encloses over a nipple. My head falls back as I moan appreciatively. 

“So good.” My voice is needy, encouraging him to slide a hand down between my legs. He spreads my thighs wider, then uses his fingers to move my wet panties to the side. He plays with my slick flesh, kneading and circling until I’m pressing insistently into his hand.

It’s been so long since he’s touched me. It doesn’t take much more of our rhythmic movements to make me cum. I run my fingers up his jaw as he kisses me deeply. Eventually, we work each others clothes off, fumbling awkwardly in the dark.

“How should we do this?” He chuckles. I’m too pregnant to be on my back. I would need a few pillows to support my belly doggy style. I can be on top, but the thought of him seeing my pregnancy chins up close and personal feels like a turn off.

“Um, maybe side by side.” 

“You don’t like that.” He immediately shakes his head.

“I said that once and it’s because you were too wasted to fuck me right.” I roll my eyes at him as he drops his mouth open in shock.

“You came that night!”

“Did I?” He sucks in a shocked breath and holds it while pursing his lips at me. “I did.” I admit, snickering as we get into position. I am on my side, legs close together and knees curled up while he takes an approach from under me so we are almost making a T. 

“Time to shut you up.” He snips, stroking his cock through my slit. I’m so wet and slick, he glides right through, teasing my clit with sloppy friction. He reaches for the baby, anchoring a hand there while the other reaches for my hand, lacing our fingers together as he enters me. I bite my lip, sucking in a deep breath at the intensity. The increased blood flow has everything tightened for me. He feels incredible- so thick and filling. “Mmm, now it feels like I’m home.” He moans, easing out and then pumping back in.

“I missed you so much.” I groan, squeezing his fingers. 

“Yeah? Can you play with yourself for me. I can’t reach from here. Somethings in the way.” I run my fingers up my belly until I reach my nipples, pinching them into stiff peaks. 

“No baby talk.”I whine as I continue stroking my nipples. We’ve had sex many times since I’ve been pregnant but not since the baby has been this big. If he kicks against my organs right now, I’m not sure I’ll be able to keep going. 

“Okay, but stay still, buddy.” He gently rubs my stomach as he increases his thrusts. All baby talk ceases as I start moaning my baby daddy’s name, begging for him to keep going. Our thrusts echo through the room, the silky sheets, adding a soft pleasure as I writhe against them.

“Ohmygod. Oh… ohmygod.” I whimper as he presses deeper into me, picking a staccato beat. I suck in a shaky breath, then roll my head back against the pillow to shout loudly at the ceiling as I come. My inner muscles clench around his cock as he slows his thrusts. I melt into the pillow, biting my lip as his last few thrusts combine my cum with his. “Was that… good for you?” I ask into the dark. He didn’t make much noise and now I’m feeling a little insecure that I just had an amazing time and he thought it was meh.

“No.” He admits, sliding out of me. “It was way better than that.” Happy tears pinch my eyes as he moves to the side of me. “It’s been awful here without you.” I sniff as he wraps his arms around me. He is patient and sweet as a few drops make a break for it down my cheeks. “Sorry, I can’t control it.”

“I know, Em. It’s cute.” He combs his fingers through my hair, letting his hand fall into the rest of my hair fanned out behind my head. “Your hair is so long.”

“Yeah, it’s the prenatals.”

“Kinda like it.”

“Enjoy it now. It’s all gonna fall out after I give birth. At least that’s what I’ve read.” I study his face, silently terrified he will lose interest in me with the mark pregnancy, and soon birth, is leaving on my body. 

“I’d love you even if you were bald.” He says it with such confidence, giving his head a reassuring nod.

“I don’t mean all of it.” I snort, scratching an itch at the end of my nose. He goes quiet, just looking into my eyes. I’m laying slightly on my side, scrunched up against his left arm, hair tossed behind my head with a slight sheen of sweat still clinging to my skin.

“So many nights I dreamed of being here like this with you.” His voice holds so much emotion, causing me to bite my lip. “But the reality of you here, pregnant with our baby… is better than any dream.”

I nod my head in agreement, then spend the next few minutes we are awake, kissing him in tender appreciation.

- - -

The day our son is born starts like any other off-season day. Timo and I share breakfast together before he heads out to train with Nico. By the time he comes back, I am having pain in my abdomen and back. He finds me on the birthing ball in the middle of the living room, watching TV with my phone as a timer.

“Hey babies.” He kisses the top of my head. “Gonna rinse off in the shower quick.”

“I think I’m having contractions.” I’ve had Braxton Hicks on and off for the last couple of weeks, but this is different. More consistent timing and deeper. Timo grins.

“Yeah?” He wiggles his eyebrows excitedly. He cannot wait for our son to enter this world. “Do I have time to shower?”

“Yes, I’m not- oh!” I gasp as my water breaks mid-sentence. “I guess not.” I finish with a laugh of disbelief.

“I’ll get the bags!” He is visibly giddy as I stare at the fluid beading down the silicon ball between my legs.

14 hours later, I fall back into the pillows of the hospital bed, convinced that I can’t push anymore than I already have for the last hour. Timo stands on my left, hands full, one with my left leg and the other with my hand.

“Am I doing this right?” I groan to Dr. Lori. “Why isn’t he out?” It comes out as a hiccup of a sob. I’m so tired. I’m sweaty and emotional and I think if Timo tells me one more time how great I’m doing, I’m gonna have to slap him.

“Yes, you’re doing this right.” Dr. Lori assures me. “His head is almost out. Bare down hard on this next one and we are going to see progress.” My lips and eyebrows crumple into a deep frown. 

“This fucking sucks.” I hiss before I tighten my grip on Timo’s hand and push as hard as I can. The intensity of what I know is a head forcing out is so strong that I forget to breathe for a second. Timo’s thumb brushes comfortingly against the leg he’s holding.

“In and out, babe.” Timo demonstrates, squeezing my hand back. I turn to look at him, eyes wild with distress.

“Oh my god, this is so intense.” I grit my teeth together as I finish through the push. The pain burns and pierces even through the various medications flowing into my IV.

“This is so hard, baby, but you’re doing great. Keep going. He’s so close. So close, Em.” Timo’s steady voice gets me through the worst of it.

“Great job! His head is out. Hold off. Do not push.” I feel her fingers gliding along, checking him and working on adjusting him for the rest of delivery.

“Okay.” I grind my teeth harder as my forehead tightens in concentration and pain. “Babe, help. Say… something. Anything… to distract me.” The need to push is so intense that it physical hurts to keep my body from doing it. I hiss in my breaths as I hold back, listening to Timo tell me how much he loves me.

“You’re almost done. Moments away from meeting our baby.” His fingers rub against the back of my hand.

“I’m going to turn him and then you’re going to push him the rest of the way out.” I grunt out in pain as she twists him so his shoulder’s can come out. My eyes roll back into my head as Timo grips my fingers in acknowledgement. He grimaces hard at the discomfort on my face; He hates seeing me like this.

“Yep, that’s the worst part.” Dr. Lori confirms. “Push now. Steady and hard.” I let my body take over and in one more big exertion, I can feel Lio Meier enter the world completely. The relief is instant. I fall back into the pillows in absolute exhaustion, eyes drooping but eager for a peek of our baby.

“Emma.” Timo is choking on tears when he sees him. “He’s here.” He brushes the sweaty strands of hair from my forehead. “Look at the perfect baby we made.” His lips are on my face, whichever part of it they can reach over the bar of the hospital bed.

Dr. Lori holds our son up in all his screaming glory. The overwhelming emotions charge through me as tears of every feeling collect together in my eyes. I begin to shake from adrenaline and pride, turning to kiss Timo’s lips.

“Your parents have been waiting for you, Lio.” Dr. Lori cheers as she holds him up. The nurse beside my head works with Timo to unsnap my gown. Lio is placed on my bare chest and the axis of our whole world shifts right here in a St. Gallen hospital.

“I’m so proud of you. You were amazing. Absolutely incredible.” Timo’s praise swells in my chest beneath our son. I wrap my hands tighter around him, barely aware of the liquids that coat his little body. 

“Do you want to cut the cord, dad?” Dr. Lori asks. When she calls him dad, Timo’s eyes fill again and he nods because he can’t speak. I bite my bottom lip, watching as she walks him through how to do it. When it’s done, he gives me a pleased grin.

“Just as hard as my job.” I joke. He leans down, placing our lips together in a kiss that has a depth greater than anything on earth. He kneels all the way down to eye level with us, large hand coming to Lio. I watch him stroke the thick, wet hair on our son’s head. His blue eyes swim with tears, letting them dash freely down his face. 

“Thank you, Em. I’ll never be able to repay you for him.”

It’s true. Growing and birthing a human for us is something he can’t do. But I know a fair enough comparison. It’s a moment I’ve thought about since we separated in New Jersey.

“Marry me?” I say. He pauses, eyes snapping to mine. New, fat tears flow down, mixing with the sweat on my face and neck. I don’t need another moment on this earth to convince me that he is my forever. I’ve known it for years anyway. His lips tighten with emotion for a moment before he leans forward to kiss me. With one hand on our baby and one on my head, we fall in love with each other all over again. Together this time.

“I’m supposed to ask you.”

“You’re taking too long.” I insist between our soft smooches. 

“You’re very impatient for someone convinced she didn’t want this.” He pulls back to gaze tenderly into my eyes. “Guess it’s a good thing there is a diamond ring in my bag.” He lets go of my hand to reach for his bag on the couch. I grip our son tighter, watching as he pulls the red box from between two t-shirts. My legs are still spread open as they do post-birth work. Our son is filled with bodily fluids. I’m high as a kite on hormones and drugs. But when he slips that 4 carat ring onto my finger, everything about this is perfect.

Our doctors and nurses cheer in congratulations that make me laugh against Timo’s mouth.

“You didn’t say yes.” I tease through my joy, admiring the way the large diamond glistens against our son’s body.

“Yes, baby. Yes, for the rest of my life.”

[danielmndoza]

[DANIEL MENDOZA. 30. CIS MALE. HE/HIM] is here! They’ve lived in Asbury Park for [30 YEARS] and are originally from [ASBURY PARK, NEW JERSEY]. They are a [RECORD STORE OWNER/MANAGER AT GROOVY GRAVEYARD] and in their downtime love [WRITING SONGS FOR HIS D&D GROUP] and [FALLING ASLEEP TO PODCASTS]. They look a lot like [SEAN TEALE] and live in [SUNCREST]. The song that makes people think of them the most is [UNDER PRESSURE BY QUEEN].

FOLKS!! [clap] it is time for me to round out my promise and present idiot #2. strap in.

meet DANNY.

going to do this in bullet points because his story is a lot less linear than kacey's and also ??? i feel like it ??? ok

people know him as either daniel or danny, both is fine, he'll even respond to dan or "hey you guy" because honestly he Hates Confrontation

oldest child, was always used to bearing the brunt of responsibility. it was kind of like his siblings could do no wrong but any minor mistake he made was scrutinized

his family runs a restaurant and fully expected him to take it over. him and his siblings all worked there since they were teens, and when he saw the opportunity to break out in the form of buying his dream shop (groovy graveyard) he took it, along with his former best friend. they bought it together after the old owner with no next of kin passed on

his dad was very upset by this and no longer speaks to him, his mom tries to still keep in touch quietly without his dad knowing

his siblings, despite danny being the scapegoat, he loves very much and would do anything for them. in my head he's very close with his little sister. he used to be close to his younger brother but they've fallen out of touch a bit. his brother is the one that ended up taking the restaurant over and has taken on the role of "stepping up" so there's probably a bit of tension over that

danny generally assumes people have good intentions. this gets him into hot water more often than not, especially in the case of his business. probably the happiest moment of his life was acquiring his store, but he enlisted the help of his friend in order to do that. his friend, who, embezzled all of the funds for the business and disappeared for a year afterwards. the friend is no longer on the paperwork, but they still haven't paid danny back for the money they stole, either. the store nearly closed over it, and danny hasn't forgotten nor forgiven them for it.

in love he's very loyal, almost to a fault. he had the same girlfriend all through high school until she went away for college and cheated on him. since then his relationships have been a series of falling for someone very quickly, thinking the world of them, and the relationship turning out to not be what he thought. ok listen ill just say it, 500 days of summer-core

he's a huge dork. really into music and writes songs and stuff, so you would think he would be a Cool Guy. and I guess maybe he is and can seem that way, but hiding underneath that vintage leather jacket is like, an entire sleeve of Magic the Gathering cards and ideas for his 79th new D&D homebrew campaign.

also loves video games, board games, and weird shit. i think he had an ex at one point who was super into astrology (insert "someone cooked here" meme) and he actually learned a lot about it, he just likes learning about things in general. very open minded. will gladly talk to you about the denver airport if you ask

CONNECTION IDEAS;

the big one is obviously his ex friend who stole money and nearly ruined his business, i will probably offer that as a wc but in case anyone saw that and it fit into their bio i'm slapping it down here

siblings will also be a wc, but i'm open to other family! cousins, or that thing of like where you grow up around each other so you feel like family? the fake cousins at the neighborhood barbecue

all the exes, but especially his first love that broke his heart

friends!! all the friends. some ideas - regular customers at the groovy graveyard, a long time best friend who has stayed close with him and helped him through the mess with his other former best friend, his D&D group and other friends he games with (please i beg) and anything else you can think of

for rival/antagonistic connections, i'd love people who have been bad influences on his siblings in some way.

oh!! he is a cat dad so any other cat people RISE UP ok but no really maybe they debated the pros and cons of automatic feeders one time at the grocery store

ALSO I FORGOT TO ADD HE NEEDS ROOMMATES !!!!

that's all for now but im always open for plotting out other things!! sorry this is so messy i just really wanted to get this up so i could start writing ok ok