#liveblogging green wing

[vynegar]

teaser for the next major event in CN server! which picture do you think is which guy?

(my guess is artem, vyn, marius, then luke)

[nonasuch]

The 2022 Miss Universe pageant was last night!

Which means: the National Costumes are here.

Yes, there is video. It’s worth watching if you want to see how some of these look in motion, but I’m warning you in advance that the emcees keep doing these shitty little rhyming couplets, and they will make you want to strangle them with one of the many available voluminous gown trains. So I’m suffering on your behalf, and liveblogging.

First up: Albania.

Sparkly flag-inspired bodysuit with train is the voting “present” of the Miss Universe National Costume Competition.

Angola. She did a fun dance on her way to center stage, which would probably not have been possible in her original costume, which was “tree-inspired” and too big to ship to New Orleans.

Argentina. This is where the video does come in handy, because without it I would not be able to award her First Contestant To Visibly Struggle Under The Weight Of Her Outfit. It’s a waterfall. The rainbow crotch area was certainly a design choice.

Armenia. I would like to see what’s going on with the bodice behind the... shield thing? but she never put it down.

Also, it turns out that when one contestant has a costume dedicated to solemn remembrance of the Armenian genocide, and the contestant immediately after her has a costume that’s about beach parties, there is kind of an uncomfortably abrupt tonal shift that happens onstage.

Aruba. Like I said: weird tonal shift! She did a little shimmy dance at Miss Armenia as they passed each other and it was clearly awkward for both of them. This is made of recycled materials leftover from Carnival, which is cool? I guess?

Australia. This is a prom dress. Boo.

Bahrain. A rare pants look! There’s a lot of detail in the headdress and bodice that’s kind of getting lost, but it looks cool in motion. Also the theme is apparently “Bahrain is rich as fuck,” so congrats I guess?

Belgium. Okay so the theme of this costume, my hand to g-d, is “the window on the International Space Station that Belgium built.” Why does this requires a shit-ton of leftover Christmas tinsel and some very awkward-to-wear angel wings? I do not know.

Belize. This is fun! It’s a good “lesser-known Batman villainess” kind of look. Like if Ivy and Catwoman co-mentored someone. The actual theme is “the world’s only jaguar reserve, which is in Belize,” but I think it’s also kind of implying that she might be a were-jaguar. Which, again, is fun!

Bhutan. This goes in the “just an actual regional/folk costume” category, which is also kind of like voting Present, but it looks like the fabrics are nice.

Bolivia. She has an entire Andean condor on her head so I’m already on board. This photo only shows the cloak, which is covered in silver spangles in honor of Bolivia’s silver mines, and is also why her condor is perched on a miner’s helmet. The dress underneath is entirely made of swags of sparkly gold beads, so the visual effect is actually pretty nice in motion.

Brazil. The construction details on this are actually quite lovely! Lots of intricate beading and rhinestone work. Unfortunately that doesn’t convey well at any distance, and also that white fin peplum thing flaps around really awkwardly when she walks. Oh, wait, she can flip it up to be a clamshell thing behind her head!

That looks much better.

British Virgin Islands. First giant flower of the year!

Bulgaria. Apparently this is made of neoprene? So with that and the rainbow stripes, the effect ends up being kind of “what if Midsommar, but at a rave.”

Cambodia. It feels weird to say “yep, standard Miss Universe warrior goddess costume” but basically that’s what this is. I do like the green-and-gold color palette, though.

Cameroon. “The baskets represent the nation’s agricultural movement.” Okay! I like how it’s giving “Valkyrie, but make it Global South,” though I’m not sure three entire country-shaped cutouts were necessary.

Canada. Another fine Miss Universe tradition: contestant who knows how to dance en pointe so she’s going to goddamn wear a costume that goes with pointe shoes, Or Else. Some nice beadwork! I would let her be the third, secret red swan in Swan Lake if that were a thing.

Cayman Islands. Sexy Blue Iguana is a fun concept! There’s a tail in back of the cape.

Chile. Sexy Atacama Desert is kind of abstract, as these things go, but I respect her choice to wear something she could walk in.

China. Hilariously, the announcer was like “This look... does not match the bio we were given, so I’m gonna wing it!” The fabrics are nice -- the satin drapes and moves well -- but the embellishments are kind of meh compared to some of the Miss China looks I’ve seen.

Colombia. This is a legit great Sexy Phoenix, but I need you all to know that her crown got turned a little sideways while she walked to the stage and she clearly knew it and just as clearly could do nothing about it, and I feel bad for laughing but it was funny.

Costa Rica. Sexy hummingbird! I think I’ve identified a recurring theme for this year. Corset and wings are made of recycled materials, which is nice, and they look well-made -- a lot of wing-based costumes tend to flop around or go crooked in motion, but not these.

Croatia. Oh, honey. This has big “my mom helped me make this the night before it was due” energy, unfortunately.

Curacao. “Meet the Fisherman’s Wife, a woman with a key role in Curacao’s fishing industry.” Okay? Honestly you could have left off the basket and said “this costume represents the beautiful marine life of Curacao” and I would have been like “yep, checks out” but now I have many follow-up questions.

Czech Republic. This is meant to be a Mucha-inspired look but uh. Mostly it’s just. beige. I’m starting to feel like all the other Slavic countries saw advance photos of Miss Ukraine and were like “let’s just phone it in this year, girls, there’s no point.”

Dominican Republic. “This costume recognizes the importance of birds in Dominican culture.” They did make it with silk feathers, which I appreciate, because it would have been very weird to use real ones with that mission statement. Also I like her headdress, and the giant feather fans are a good way to nod in the direction of wings without the hassle of actually wearing wings.

Ecuador. This looks good in motion! She did some dancing onstage that worked well, and there’s a great sculpted Inca head scowling on the back of her headdress. This is still only a few notches above voting Present, though.

El Salvador. “History of Currency,” which is definitely a concept! The Bitcoin wizard staff is sure something.

Equatorial Guinea. A perfectly nice entry in the “actual regional costume” category, but on the video I was like “oh, yikes, her headdress is really wobbly” and then it FELL OFF and I felt so bad for her.

Finland. “Spirit of the Forest”? Fuck off, that’s a prom dress. Boo.

I’m going to pause here so this readmore doesn’t get completely out of control. Shit, there are 50 more of these? Well, I have only myself to blame.

[phosphorus-noodles]

Hi everyone!!

Lots of people asked for the pattern I used for my Joel and Lizzie dolls, but due to my mental unwellness, my "pattern" was actually a chaotic blend of multiple patterns, as well as my own spontaneity.

Nonetheless, I am going to attempt to explain the method to my madness in this post! (Fair warning, it will get long.)

(If you actually want to try to recreate this please PLEASE reach out to me!!! I can go into way more detail and do diagrams and whatnot if you really wanna see the full idea!!!)

I'm gonna do my best to divide this up into sections based on how I made them, but because I modified a lot of things and Joel and Lizzie are clearly not the same, it may get a little muddled along the way, but here goes!

The Bodies

First thing's first, this is the link to the tutorial I used for the basic body shape. Super great video, easy to understand, fantastic starting point for any doll!! :D

For Joel, I followed the tutorial pretty exactly, minus that middle seam for a belt. I changed colors for the boots, pants, and coat and kept all the measurements the same.

For Lizzie, I modified her pattern to be a little bit bigger bc haha funny tall wife. On parts of the pattern where the stitch count stayed the same, I added a few more rows to make them longer. I added 4 rows to the legs, 3 rows to the chest, and two rows to the arms.

Like this!

listen I had to visualize it somehow-

I also did a gradient for Lizzie's arms/legs/tail! Here is the video I used to figure out how to do it (I don't have the measurements for where I changed colors I'm sorry I'm goofy </3)

Also, here is a link to a post where I half-heartedly liveblogged the early stages of making them. You can kinda get a rough idea of where I changed colors for different parts of their outfits, etc. but I only got two steps, really- oops.

The Clothes

Now, this is the part where I documented virtually nothing, but honestly, it still turned out just fine!

For Joel, I made boot and sleeve cuffs by just single crocheting a chain to fit around his arm/leg and adding a couple of sc (single crochet) rows. Then I sewed the ends together with a long yarn tail, used thinner gold yarn to add some detailing (look up backstitching! it works really well!!), and sewed the edges on.

His coat ends were made in the same way, but bigger, and instead of sewing the edges fully together, I only connected the top stitches when I was attaching it. And because I'm a messy sewer, I easily hid the seam with a black sc-chain belt :)

The gold details of his coat is also a sc-chain just sewed on. The edges at the bottom... were sorta a sc-hemming type deal-? I don't know, I winged it and I don't like how it turned out </3

The shoulder pads I actually can tell you! It's 5 sc in a magic circle, sc around, and then I picot stitched around in each stitch. Then I tied off a long tail and sewed it onto the top of the arms before I attached them. The badge/flower is the same pattern, but without the sc round in between the mc and the picots.

The sash was a little wonky doing it as a full loop the whole time, so it was basically a long rectangle and when I was attaching the ends together I did it under the shoulder things so it wouldn't be bulky and ugly on top. I think it's decently easy to understand from the pictures in the original post, but if not lmk! (if any of this is coming across at all then bless you tbh.)

The collar is just two rectangles I sewed side by side, they don't continue to the back at all bc they were ugly /lh

And this is the tutorial I used for the crown! I threaded a little piece of green yarn through to make the jewel and tied a knot in the back :)

For Lizzie, I literally made the skirt up as I went along, but it was roughly based on this video. I started with a sc chain to get the right size, then made it a rectangle for a couple of rows (maybe like four?) before joining it together. (That way, I could make the skirt separately and still be able to get it back on her when I was done without being too tight!)

At some point, I picked a stitch as my "center point" and started going back and forth from about that point instead of completing the full circle, doing half double crochets close to it, then double crochets, then triple crochets, then back to dc and hdc as I got close to it again. I think I did about 6-8 for each stitch type section? The GOAL was to make the skirt's hem asymmetrical, which worked, but it's hard to explain bc I literally made it up.

Then I made another sc chain for the belt thing after I attached it :)

The top detailing is also a sc chain, but with some joined yarn above the arms for extra color. There's also bits of yarn that are supposed to be straps, but you can't really see them in any of the pictures, so that's optional rip.

For the frilly hem, I joined the yarn at the "center point" and basically just worked around the whole hem repeating (1 dc, 2dc inc) to make it all wavy and fun!

The Hair

The pattern I based the hair off of was from this kpop star doll that I was originally going to base my entire Joel doll off of.

The difference is I changed the lengths of the strands (I did it based off looks, so all of them are slightly different in length to look more natural) and also color changed the very front few strands of Joel's hair to be green. I also put two strands in a few of the back stitches instead of just one so they completely covered the back of the head (so there are 15-16 strands instead of 14.)

To attach the hair, I used pins to mark out where I wanted to place each strand. Here's a quick progress shot I sent to my friends:

Now, I wasn't smart, and used long pieces of thread from tying off the "hair mop" to sew all the strands onto the head individually. It took forever and make it kinda messy in the back because of weird overlapping. If I could redo it now, I'd use fabric glue or something to glue each strand so it lays flat, although if you don't have it or want to avoid the potential mess, sewing it does in fact work just fine.

Extra Bits (mostly for Lizzie)

Lizzie's tail is more or less the same as her arm, but it starts thinner and goes for longer at the end. For the frilly edge, I remember using a crochet beta fish fin design, but I can't for the life of me find it in my history now?? But it was essentially joining the yarn a few stitches from the point and crocheting (hdc, dc 2x, tr, dc 2x, hdc, dc 2x, tr) and mirroring it on the other side so it looked like this:

Here's a closer view of both the tail and the skirt's hem.

Lizzie's fins were made by making a magic circle, chaining 4 and sc-ing back, and slip stitching back into the circle three times to make the three points. Then I joined onto one point with the lighter color and sc-ed along to the other point to make it more detailed.

Here's a cursed image I sent to my friends of bald Lizzie and her fins.

Lizzie's space buns were a fever dream to me because I made them at 1 am, but I did something that looks similar to this puff stitch flower with only three "petals." I attached it to the head and then used a short chain of another color to add some color and detail.

Here's a view of a bun from the top.

---

I think that's just about it! If I missed anything or want to know how I did something better, please please PLEASE reach out to me!!

I'd love to go into more depth on things, but I predict this post will top off at 5 notes so I don't really want to spend hours explaining something that'll go completely unseen /lh

Nonetheless, I hope you enjoyed this little insight into the inner workings of my brain! Feel free to share and tag me in anything if you decide to try to do this yourself.

Cheers!! <3

[pieofdeath]

i emerge several hours later with the across the spiderverse liveblog. for people who don't want to read it: fantastic movie! all the different art styles were really cool! i miss noir a lot! I can't wait for the 3rd movie!!!

Incredible intro sequence, once again

I'm watching this one on my actual TV too

Oh I didn't say this with the first one but having the approved by the comics code authority stamp right before the movie is an incredible choice

!!! GWEN 💖

Is it a spider rule that you have to have been bit on your arm/hand

The INCREDIBLE drumming sequence 

Ok noted Gwen is from earth 65

Gwen, don't be mean to the drums :(

Band mates look fun!

Peter from her universe seems so nice!!!

HE DRANK SOME FUCKIN RADIOACTIVE THING???

page 1 break (this is the same document as the first movie's liveblog)

GWENS PROM OUTFIT

HOLY SHIT is Peter green goblin for Gwen???

“I just wanted to be special.” Said by PETER FUCKING PARKER IS FUCKING ME UP.

I'm getting all the compounded emotions from the first movie 

HE KNOWS WHO SHE IS

AND THEN HE DIED.

the doors closed and showing Spider-Woman and then opening and showing Gwen…

This voice talking is for Sure JJJ

Hey aren't y'all proud of me I knew that

Oh the caption said Jonah I'm not as cool :(

Her dad being a cop trying to hunt her down 

Wait in this universe Uncle Ben is alive :(

HER DAD’S WEARING A VISIONS ACADEMY SHIRT

Gwens world has such a pretty art style. it's so colorful and painterly, it's absolutely gorgeous 

THE WAY THE COLORS BLOOM WHEN SHE GIVES HER DAD A HUG

Gwen being cool colors in the warm toned kitchen… 

her hiding her suit in the drum is so cool

THE PIC OF HER AND MILES!!!

THE TRANS FLAG HAHAHAHA YAAAAAY

the music is so cool

Gwens world! Again! Gorgeous!!

Yuri! I know that name from the snapcube fandub :)

The deep voice she does for her dad 😭

THIS VULTURE LOOKS SOOOOOOO COOOOOOOOOL

PAPER MAN!

what universe is he from 

OHHH HE'S FROM A SICK RENAISSANCE WORLD!!!

THATS SO COOL ARE THESE COMICS REAL SOMEONE TELL ME WHERE TO FIND THEM!!!

JEFF KOONS. POINTS.

The Renaissance man hating Jeff Koons and modern art is so funny!!! 

The vulture is animated in such a cool way

MIGUEL!!!!!!!!!

DARK GARFIELD

THE COMICS FROM THE LAST MOVIE ARE STILL IN THE PILE :D

I hope we see a lil bit of Noir I miss him :(

Miguel having sketchy lines + shoulders is so cool

DOCTOR STRANGE MENTION 

THE WING REBUILDING THATS SO COOL

WHO IS THIS MOTORCYCLE LADY!!!!!!!!

I HAVE NEVER SEEN HER BEFORE!!!!!!!

COOL SPIDERWOMAN. SHE'S PREGNANT AND MARRIED

“will you adopt me?” “What?” “What?”

page 2 break

Is she married to Miguel?

MIGUEL WITH THE FUCKING TEEEEEEETH

Miguel 🤝 my spidersona/spiderman oc. Having big ol teeth 

I really need to talk about her

The running home of calling the universe glitching “banksy” 😭 y'all live in New York isn't he British!

The shot of Gwen holding her hands up trying to talk to her dad….

SHE TOOK OFF THE MASK…

“How long have you been lying to me?” 

“Can you just not be a cop for a second, and be my dad here and listen to me?”

The background changing to be the mask…

Seriously Gwen's world is STUNNING and I can see why her costume looks like that now

HE TRIED TO FUCKING ARREST HER…

New comic for the Pile! Miles Again!

Miles is from 1610… Got it…

hehe my blorbo is from 1910 :)

The parents waiting for miles :( 

THE SPOT. I KNOW THAT GUYS NAME. 

Those cameras look like the fnaf cameras to me

The spot trying to get the money 😭

“NO! SIR! PLEASE JUST LET ME ROB YOU!” 😭😭😭

“I'm a scientist. Or, I was. I am. You've heard of alchemax. I used to work there.” IS THIS FUCKING BAGEL GUY!!! SAY IT'S THE BAGEL GUY.

THE LITTLE SPIDER DRAWING it's so cute

I love Miles' art btw it's so good

MILES HAS TO MAKE YOUTUBE APOLOGIES?!

JJJ!!!! hehe

“I don't dwell on it” while drawing so much art of Gwen. 

The additions to the Expectations graffiti of the other Spiders and Uncle Aaron (both Uncle and prowler edition)...

The dad trying to spell important and failing 😭

How he ended up catching Spot 😭

AP STUDIO ART I DID THAT 🫵

MILES FLAKING TO GET SPOT

HIS DAD IS ON THE PTA 

I'm so certain this is Bagel Guy 

HIS DAD RUNNING DOWN THE STAIRS

IT'S BAGEL GUY!

“Spiderman, why did you create this guy?” 😭 Even when he doesn't know it's his son he's in dad mode

Miles trying to get his dad to Talk About His Emotions… I love that

“Maybe get off the kids ass…” “what?” “What?”

“You gotta let him spread his wings, man. Like this.” Thanks for that demonstration miles sjdfjdjakskg

page 3 break

Spot trapped in weird spot dimension

“Hypothesis. I'm going to put my head in that hole.” Not a hypothesis but carry on

YO. CLASSIC COMICS WORLD.

LEGO WORLD!!!!!!!!!

THE CASH REGISTER JUST BEING SO CHILL ABOUT SPOT 

LEGO SPIDERMAN IS PART OF THE MULTIVERSE THING WITH MIGUEL!!!!

literally obsessed with this

Are those kids playing Yu-Gi-Oh 

UNCLE AARON GRAFFITI!!!

His dad was so excited to say he was grounded

The DJ looks fucking STRESSED 

what fucking incredible reality warping bullshit is happening in his room

GWEN HIIIII

SHE HUGGED HIM IMMEDIATELY AUWJDJSJ 

GWEN YOU CAN'T JUST OPEN THE PACKAGE OF A COLLECTIBLE LIKE THAT. 

Her name is Jess Drew!

If he doesn't tell his parents about Spider-Man I'm gonna cry

SHAKESPEARE DIMENSION I WANNA SEEEEEEEE

HOBIE MENTION!

What weird things did she plant

SPOT! HI SPOT

the cute upside down sitting!!!!

Miles’ new suit looks really nice btw

“In every other universe, Gwen Stacy falls for Spiderman. And in every other universe, it doesn't end well.”

“There's a first time for everything, right?” ADORABLE

Gwen in casual wear is really cute

SURPRISE MOM

The conversation between Miles and his mom… it's fucking me up. I love them so much. I love these movies so much.

Him stripping down to the suit as he's going down the stairs 

Spot’s name is Dr Jonathan Ohnn… Noted. He looks rlly cool

The way the thought boxes look while he's invisible is so cool

The colorful glitching and reality warping is so cool

THE TUNNELS IN THE MULTIVERSE

EARTH 50101 IS SO FUCKING COOL

THE FUCKING SICK AS HELL YOYO??????

PAVITR IS SO FUCKING COOL IM OBSESSED WITH HIM.

“This is where the traffic is, this is where the traffic is, this is where the traffic is and this is where the British stole all our stuff”

Pav shipping them so fucking hard 😭

HOBIEEEEEEEEEEEEE

I'M LITERALLY OBSESSED WITH HIM!!!

SPOT LOOKS SO FUCKING COOL. OH MY GOD.

page 4 break

OH NO PAVS GIRLFRIEND

“Markers are predicting an upcoming canon event” STARES DIRECTLY AT GAYATRI.

SHES OK AND SO IS HER DAD YAAAY

wait hold on. Canon event disrupted. One of them wasn't supposed to be okay.

Hobie is incredible btw. I love his animation in contrast to the other three.

I miss noir 

Pav’s suit is fantastic btw idk if I've said that

“What's that?” “It's a metaphor for capitalism” Hobie 😭

Oh there's other guys. I'm staring so directly. 

Fun fancy white spider. Pink spider. Spider with multiple arms. 

“I don't follow orders, neither does he.” “I'm invited to HQ? WOO!!!!” [Hobie looking so upset] 

so obsessed with Hobie and Miles already. They're buddies.

NEW COMIC IN THE PILE

HOBIE IS SO PRETTY I KNEW WHAT HE LOOKED LIKE BUT MAN. HIS HAIR IS ALSO DRAWN DUPER COOL WITH THE ANIMATION 

Miguel is from 928… 

HQ LOOKS SO FUCKIN SICK

Idk who Malala Windsor is but I love her. From 835 it looks like?

All the puns. Quipping is a spiderman constant 😭

THERE'S SO MANY SPIDERS!!!!!!!

Peter Parkedcar??? 

OBSESSED WITH WEBSLINGER. IS THIS GUY REAL WHERE CAN I BUY HIS COMICS.

Is that spiderman from one of the games

That animation is distinctly different and reminds of stuff my faefriend has shown me

hold on was that a real ass human. 

THATS FUCKING DONALD GLOVER 

AUAUDHFJSJAKRK

MIGUEL!!!

did he just give himself a venom shot. what was that

Aww Miguel's daughter is so cute

“Just don't enlist till you know what war you're fighting” HOBIE!

PETERRRRRRRR

WITH A BABY HARNESS THINGY

LITTLE BABYYYYY HER NAMES MAYYYYYY HE CALLS HER MAYDAY

HE MADE HER A TINY WEBSHOOTER

“Spider-Verse…” “Spider-Verse… that sounds stupid” 😭

REAL WORLD TOBY MCGUIRE???

I didn't realize that it's police inspectors… That's so wild. 

Bro Miguel needs a hug

SHIT MILES IS RIGHT HIS DAD IS ABOUT TO BECOME CAPTAIN…

“If not for Uncle Ben, most of us wouldn't be here, Miles “ AUSHDJFJSMAMD…

ANDREW GARFIELD????

page 5 break

PENI'S HERE YAYYY

WHERE'S NOIR!

is this like PS1 spiderman

“Kid, look at me-” “stop calling me that.” “There we go.” “Hobie, you're not helping.” “Good.”

“little man. Peter Pan. Palms.” 

HOBIE IS LITERALLY THE BEST DAMN CHARACTER. 

HOBIE QUIT CLAPPING AND CHEERING

THE SPIDERMAN POINTING SCENEEEEE

MILES HIDING ON THE GUYS BACK

IS THAT A SPIDER T-REX

OG TV SHOW SPIDER-MAN 

Took a break here to go practice my clarinet before school starts up

Alright I'm back like an hour later

Hobie looks like he was drawn with poscas 

Ben reilly looks like a rob liefeld guy

MILES IS THE ORIGINAL ANOMALY… FUCK DUDE.

BLAST MIGUEL INTO ORBITTTTTTT

OH SHIT HE'S GONNA GO TO THE WRONG WORLD BECAUSE THE SPIDER IS FROM 42… 

Spider-Byte didn't stop him from being sent home… 

GWEN D:

May blew a raspberry at Miguel 😭 smart baby

Earth 42 looks sick as hell

I love the reds and greens

Gwen and her dad 😭

HER DAD QUIT SO MAYBE HE'S NOT GOING TO DIE

“You're the best thing I've ever done” 

THE HUGGGGGGGGGG

Hobie left a fun package! 

THE PORTAL TO HOBIES WORLD IS SO COOL!

The montage of Miles swinging through the streets… 

First hint of noir I love him

OH FUCK HIS DAD IS BEING CALLED CAPTAIN 

GWENNN

MILES DOESN'T KNOW HE'S NOT HOME…

it sounds like he's coming out as gay and you know what he is

Who's spiderman

I knew it was coming but damn

UNCLE AARON!!!!!

Oh Miles had braids in 42, I wanna see that

Oh my god what is 42-Miles mixed up in. 

HIS DAD'S DEAD IN 42…

GWEN TALKING TO HIS PARENTS

page 6 break

His dad called her emo 😭

“He loves you more than you could ever imagine. I've seen it.”

NEW COMIC ON THE PILE

Uncle Aaron is so menacing in this world

Prowler wears Nike airs 

OH SHIT MILES FROM 42 IS PROWLER????

Braids look fantastic

The difference in how 42-Miles and Miles are shaded is WONDERFUL 

I want to know who was supposed to be bit in 42 super bad. 

THE SPOT THE SPOT THE SPOT!!!

May dangling from the ceiling 😭 she's so adorable

GWEN IN PETER'S WORLD WITH HOBIE’S PORTAL 💖

NOIRRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE MOVIE CANT BE FUCKING OVER OH MY GOD

HEAD IN HANDS I can't wait

Not going to lie from how much everyone talked about him when this came out I thought Hobie had more screen time

He's fantastic and I adore him 

I can't WAIT for beyond the spiderverse 

Skipping to see if there's an after-credits scene

Huh doesn't look like it. Absolutely wild. 

VERY good movie!!!!!

OHHHHHHH THE CASHIER WAS FROM VENOM……….. OK IT ALL MAKES SENSE NOW 

so in summary. good movie :) long but very good, it was FANTASTIC and I'm in love

[kobblefort]

Rushsly: Almost The Bottom 3

SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT probably I can't script this shit man I'm liveblogging this game raw it happens how it happens.

Ant people are back, and they're getting pretty thoroughly fucked by Ashan Plaguehole the Labyrinthine, or at least that's what it sounds like through the walls deep below the fortress. Cool. We'll check in on that again later

Even the deep-dwelling dwarves are astounded by the wealth we've accrued: we sell them the platinum goblets that feel too fancy to drink out of, they gawk at just how many gems we've accrued, how finely they can be cut. And yet we must seem strange to them, so endowed and yet so deeply unsatisfied. Most of our clothes have gone to tatters from overwear, our once thriving glass industry has been dormant for some time. It's nothing, we insist, it's nothing - but our eyes don't light up at the glint of gold. We seem sluggish, almost like we're moving at a low framerate, take a little too long to recognize jokes, and even longer after that to recognize them. We leave them with a great handful of gems we find unworthy to sell, and they thank us profusely. When all is said and done, we have a great deal of thread, new clothes for at least a few kobbles, plants of all kinds, and kobble get chease LOL.

Down below, it turns out Ashan can wield a spear, and does so with remarkable prowess: a wood spear is plenty sharp enough for its ends,

and so too for the ends of 13 ant people, a giant bat and a giant olm. I've never actually seen a forgotten beast wield a weapon before. It almost seems like it would be exciting to fight: a good match for our own Beast Slayers. But we can't take our eye off the prize.

From the other end of the second cavern layer arrives another bird (even though it has the squid icon lol,) a wren named Lidod Minesweats - probably a Dwarven name? Also I completely missed this when it happened, but Ashan apparently killed Ancoji Necroshafts, the lizard that finished off Fiva after his own encounter with the ant people from before, I wonder if a pattern is about to take shape here.

They head straight for each other.

Unfortunately, since they're both forgotten beasts, the combat log is unintelligible, but Ashan takes the wren the fuck down; not without taking some damage, most notably having an impaired ability to stand.

I forgot to look it up but this is an ankylosaurus apparently, so Ashan looks like this but green and with thin membranous wings and it's "bloated." We all on the same page here? Ok me neither. But alas.

Zhasrca Foldcounselled is way the fuck in there, near the very bottom of the earth, chopping away at the stone, only hitting granite after granite after granite. Then he finally hits something!

Just some more native gold. Just as he does, he declares himself finished for the day and tears off his busted old ocelot-leather trousers, hopefully to pick up a new pair on his way home. But interestingly, the gold wall is warm - potentially unsafe to dig through, since there could be magma on the other side. And then, up topside...

Well fuck.

The dwarves said they would leave a while ago, but hadn't yet, and so the fighting is mostly contained to them, but unfortunately, a craftsbold named Zirga Futurestrayed who was on her way up to chat with them was bitten. There's nothing for it, we're just going to have to expel her as soon as the fighting is over. Hopefully the dwarves actually fucking leave, but due to how long it took for anyone to pull the drawbridge up, two of them and a donkey are crushed by it. Awesome. People need to stop just standing there on the fucking bridge.

I have no idea how to parse this, but it feels like this guy Vucar could maybe sort of be bit? Considering how he won't fucking leave, it becomes tempting to just send our squads up there and kill him to make extra sure, but he's standing on a tile with two other dwarves who seem fine according to the combat logs. Ultimately, the problem is solved by just deconstructing the trade depot. And I learn as they leave the map that apparently one of them stole one of our platinum goblets. Not cool dude. Actually, that might have been Zirga leaving with all her horrible injuries, which... fair enough. You can have that. Sorry it had to be this way but the alternative was we kill you. And we didn't kill you! But if you come back in weregecko form there'll be no fucking mercy, not a chance. Whatever, threat over.

Progress is slow and frustrating down here: just magma walls with the occasional little vein of gems. Every little rattle of the alert tabs is a disappointment. Morion, pitchblende, heliodors, I don't give a shit. I just want the one thing. I know there's all sorts of other things I could have but I don't want them. More migrants show up, bringing our population up to 135 and our framerate down to like 49. They also brought a fuckload of animals for whatever reason, which is just great of them. Deleting the trade depot somehow handed over possession of all the animals the dwarves brought along to us...

and the underground pasture is starting to look even more crowded, so it's time it gets expanded. But hey we all love when things get expanded right.

Zil, still the angriest lil kobble in the whole fucking world, comes up and starts just digging with its hands, which feels totally unnecessary especially since Zil is the one who got its lower spine torn apart. Oh well go off I guess, who gives a shit, this isn't what I want.

Trying to dig one more layer down is a fruitless endeavor at first.

Up in the section of the fort I don't even care about anymore some dickhead makes a large gem out of green glass and decorates it with green glass gems and green glass rings. I feel like that sums this whole fort up. We should put it on a display stand outside so you can see it when you walk in, like "guess what we got in here."

I seriously can't fucking win dude

Gold, gems, magma, gold, gems, magma, gold, gems, magma it goes on and on forever.

More of these cunts, i don't care, drawbridge going up, drawbridge staying up. If you're in a hurry to step on a cage trap, then hurry up and do it already, otherwise go fuck yourselves and give Vakeek Malignreason my regards.

Welp so much for those fucking cunts wait hold on what the fuck is this

I've never seen this before. Is it about to happen? Am I almost there?

Do you fucking morons ever give it a rest I'm on the fucking precipice here

well the meat grinder awaits.

Oh not you guys too.

At least none of my own people are in danger here, but the Winged Voice left in a bad mood due to the drawbridge being up without considering why it might be up, and I don't like guests having to do our dirty work. There's such a thing as hospitality you know.

And honestly having to walk through this fucked up part of the trap hallway entrance is something I don't even want my kobbles to do.

Honestly whatever may as well get rid of these fucking pointless gems. Hopefully get some cloth and leather to give all the kobbles new clothes. It's not what I want.

But I don't know if I'm the kind of guy who can ever actually have what he wants.

[dokpetra]

I guess I've decided I'm gonna just liveblog the process of covering green light. usually I try not to be too talkative on Tumblr (tendency to over share, scared I'm going to annoy people... On my own blog... Ok unpacking some lingering insecurities here)

I also like to try and stay on the "don't talk about it be about it" side, bc time spent blabbing on here is time not spent working on the thing.

But it's good to talk about stuff? Fun even sometimes. & Could be interesting to the right people. I like hearing other artists describe their process.

I'm going all software instruments for this one, RN in the process of transcribing each instrument part. have replaced the upright piano in the original with a Wurlitzer electric piano sound as pictured in previous post. Does it sound good? IDK. I like it, and It sounds "me" so I'm going with it for the moment.

The synths in the original song are handled so subtly, often with such a light touch. I'm trying to marry that approach with my more heavy handed and funky way, without making it sound too dense. I want to bring my own intensity to it without clipping the song's wings so to speak.

I doubt I'll be able to match the kind of hovering effervescence of the original but I hope to recreate or present in a new way those big blasts of emotion contained in the song. I keep coming back to my first times hearing the song, cranking up the living room TV and singing along with my college roommates. I love songs that feel like they're reaching for something just out of sight, and in the climactic moments you get a little glimpse. So if I can offer that glimpse through my own lens I will feel I have succeeded.

[twotailednekomata]

Adventurer from the Vineyard

He~llo, everybody! So this idea has been in my mind for a while now so I've decided to try it out. This is definitely inspired by those choose-your-own-adventure votes (main example: DunGen) and I thought it will force me to practice creating a well written piece on a timely basis as well as flex my creative muscles.

For those following my Danny Phantom liveblogged reactions, do not fret for I do plan to watch more episodes, I just do not know when.

Without further ado, I hope you enjoy this prolong!

----------

In the quaint, modern city of Vineyard, the blocky, marble buildings stand stable even when vines and plants of colourful properties grow and twist and bloom playfully over them. Repurposed, artificial dragons of floating marble and gemstones, originally made to guard the area of ancient foes, now chat and wander the streets, helping which way they can, while wearing their own bouquet of flowers and vines.

Griffins, also, are another creature that protect Vineyard. They roost in the iconic, persevered ruins of a long past kingdom and abandoned buildings of old and make quite the habit of meeting with the local dragons, but, be wary, they also like to steal any jewel or gem that catch their fancy. So protect your belongings unless you want to fight a ginormous bird/lion creature for your ring back.

On the streets and in the alleyways, witches and wizards put on fantastic displays of their prowess, especially at night. They make food whiz around in the air before enchanting it with good fortune at the stalls, create art pieces and graffiti that dazzle and sculptures that can move, performances where plumes of magic swirl and spin to create spectacles that lighten up the dusky sky. Once the night is over, the people ride back on their brooms, carpets, familiars or what-have-you's as domesticated fireflies light up the streets and assisting those in need.

The city, overall, is a simple place that is known for the blues, purples and occasional pops of pinks and green all over the architecture and home to the ruins of Igneochrome.

You, young explorer, have lived in this city for as long as you remember but you decided that it is time for a change. But first, we must figure out what you will look like. Now, tell me, what do you fancy being?

Dragonborn. Your family most likely originated from outside of Vineyard but that's okay. These creatures are descendants of dragons from all over the world and their abilities is dependent on the type of dragon they're descendant of. You have a tail, scales, some spikes as well as a dragon's head.

Birdkin. Humanoids gifted with the power of flight. Their appearances and skills vary as much as the birds themselves. You have wings, a tail and talons replacing your hand and toe nails.

Catfolk. Often believed to be magical descendants of the common feline, they are born to be a menace to society! But, seriously, they are known to be nimble and often have in-depth knowledge of their city or forest, passed down from generation to generation. You have a tail, cat ears, fur and nimble paws.

Aqualing. These humanoids' appearances vary as much as the water they live in. They all, however, share gills, webbed appendages and tinted skin. Depending on the type of Aqualing you are, you will have different abilities.

Elf. Creatures of the forest associate with elegance and grace. Due to their fey origins, they are connected to nature and have a hard time living in city environments but have since adapted somewhat. You have pointy ears and a vague, uncanny allure, like having skin that sprinkle like dapple light or a river under the right conditions.

Human. You are a simple human.

----------

A reblog would be appreciated and do expect another poll or two establishing your class (think DnD classes, for now) and the specifics of your sub-species. See y'all soon! ( ✿＾▽＾)／"

[witchofthemidlands]

Julian Rhind Tutt entering Green Wing like a boss

[thechekhov]

Alright, alright, I caved.

After a slot opened up in me to be able to take on another show emotionally, I decided to invest in OwlHouse. I thought I would probably like it, but it won me over faster than I thought it would.

I’ve already watched a few episodes, but I realized that it might be more fun to do liveblogs, so here I am - with a liveblog...

I will be doing this episode by episode, and probably releasing them every once in a while. Everything will be under a cut, however, to save you all dash space.

If you’d like to follow, please track the #chekhov watches owlhouse tag!

(I’d also like to dedicate this post to the Tumblr Staff Rob, who did his best to restore this post for me when tumblr queue ate it.)

Without further ado...

Episode 1!!

Fair warning - this is technically not a ‘live’ blog, because I have already watched some of the show before deciding to do this, but I’ll still react to them to round things out.

Immediately, this reminds me of Little Witch Academia... Anyone? No? Only me? I feel like maybe I’m getting my wires crossed, but there HAD to have been some inspiration taken from there?

“No-- my only weakness! Dying!!“

Same, big snake monster. Same.

Oh, backup snakes? This girl is READY.

Please don’t mistreat the snakes.

Spider breath... This kid is on my wavelength. That griffin seems to be waiting to be put out of its misery though, and I don’t blame it.

My child... where did you get that pigeon head though.....

Nurse mother, do you REALLY think signing up your spider-summoning daughter for summer camp will actively make her antics slow down instead of ramp up to 60?

Awww, baby makes AMVs... But also, NO ONE TOLD YOU TO THROW AWAY THE BOOK??? I know it’s symbolic, but goodness, isn’t that a bit much???

wait a sec, is that Eda????

Love the realistic bilingual kid experience of replying in English when your mom talks to you in your native language. Universal.

Love this introduction of Eda’s character. She’s got that little green scarf on and everything. Like a tiny trash grandma.

Oooh, okay, let’s extrapolate...

Lots of bones everywhere. I kinda love the aesthetic here - it’s gross and visceral, kind of like what Luz was making with her school projects. Yet in the middle of it all we have a rather clear gothic looking structure. Is this a power imbalance in the supposed kingdom?

The five circles of stained glass seem to perhaps indicate something like Hogwarts houses? Several different types of magic?

But Luz has no reason to freak out as much as she is - she LOVES weird stuff! Haha... No, I kid, I kid. I get it.

“Am I in the bad place?“

Eyyyyy, gotta love shows referencing other shows. :)

“Oh dear child... I’m not like you.”

Wow, what a DRAMATIC reveal for some pointy ears. :) I love her.

We should all aspire to have such cool and stylistically well put together wanted posters. You can tell the commissioned artist really respects her craft.

Steven Universe fans watching this:

I’m looking too.

Okay, okay, enough shenanigans, let’s have some LORE.

I love this landscape. Teeth or bones, or whatever they are, this is one of the more unique settings we’ve gotten, though maybe I’m prejudiced because I love body horror and bones. The darker orange and red themes fit really well here.

Things I’m desperate for: Giraffe Lore 

Things I’m more desperate for: Eda lore. Why do her limbs fall off? Is she a zombie?

Things I’m not quite as desperate for: Hooty lore. He can keep that to himself.

well hello there mysterious chekhov’s glyph which will DEFINITELY not be relevant in the second chapter (or end of season? Maybe? Idk it just seems important).

Ah, yes. That would have been my reaction as well, to be fair. Somehow I didn’t expect to see this guy so early on. I figured he would be a low stress early villain that got assimilated into the Found Family. Kinda psyched that he’s just there from the start.

....I’m just gonna presume this is all true and accept it at face value.

Old Escape The Cops Lady and Tiny Little Demon King, I need your backstory. How did you meet.

I love looking at background details, because like... you can tell the BG artists had fun. I particularly love how the 3 eyed toad doesn’t actually have any reward attached to her. Though the Knife Baby does intrigue me!

“I write fanfics of food falling in love.”

Why am I being called out...

“Noo! My weak nerd arms!”

Finally, a realistic portrayal of a protagonist thrust into a fantasy setting!

.....................

Okay but. If only humans could pass through the barrier... wouldn’t that mean a human had to have deposited those things in there? Do they have a human on staff in this weird pseudo-prison??? Suspicious....

Confession - when I initially saw ads for this show, I expected Eda to be a villain, not a loveable middle aged witch aunt figure. I am shockingly even MORE drawn to her this way. I expected betrayal. I expected her to be a lowkey threat?? But no. She’s just wholesome in the way a solid raccoon is.

“Eda, are you okay?!”

“Yeah, this just happens when you get older...”

“........does it..?”

If I had to pinpoint the exact moment this show won me over...... it would probably be this one.

I know it’s probably the wrong thing to focus on, but what is that insignia? Wings??? Like.... the kind OWLS HAVE?????

COINCIDENCE??? I THINK NOT!!!

I’m really loving the landscape here. And those fireworks are... hmm... intricate?

Gotta love the old tried and true Witch Apprentice Actually A Live In Intern trope. :)

Hold up...

Is that

Is that Hooty? I thought he was just a door....

Eda: This is my room for human stuff. I will also put my human in there.

. . .

Overall rating: I think this is a cute overall beginning. The prison break went hard! I enjoyed the characters and it kind of surprised me in a lot of ways. It definitely does a great job setting up a world with a lot more to explore while giving us a small taste of cool magic stuff and witchy battles. :)

Now on to Episode 2!!

Read the liveblogs in order by clicking here!

[tiptapricot]

MK liveblog thoughts, Asylum

Why does this have another boring title music section uGh

The main themes being right at the beginning w the cave n Wendy,,,,, Oughhh

THE EDITING IS SO GOOD

God god god

Marc looks so beat up n confused babe I’m so sorry I’m so sorry

I still don’t think this is Jake y’all sorry I rlly just never will ok

His accent doesn’t change it just gets stronger bc he gets more upset

Dr Harrow you suck so bad

“I took the bus” “hmgggggg |:-/“

Also why does his face look totally diff Oscar why do u shift ur face

DONT BRING UP THE LITTLE BOY SHUT UR YAP

Also again… Marc’s trigger is roro n he gets mad when harrow brings it up

Taweret my love

Taweret’s painted nails n how she licks her lips o baby oh yeah

Also the fact that she’s gotta read off cards n is awkward bc this isn’t her job

Autism overrides fear of being dead, category 6 event two dead and are mad ab it

Untethered consciousness is such a fun way to describe souls

Just watching Marc fall back into old habits of thinking n self hate n being trapped in his medical trauma agghhhhh

“Mahc… mahc….”

“BingoOOOOH MY GOD”

The Duat music is amazing n the colors r LOVELYYY

Poppa-ed ya hearts out hehhehe

Steven grabbin him boobies no heart there anymore

Also how what happens when ur souls don’t balance is diff bc Ammit is entombed n cant eat them

“Kill the hippo, steal the boat”

THEYRE INCOMPLETE BC JAKE ISNY THERE U FUCK LET HIM OUTTT

“You two guys” so real they rlly are guys

“Yeawrrite”

I love Steven n Marcs bickering ab killing Taweret or not they’re so

They’re so

I love the memory rooms hey don’t go into they’re so cool looking

N the music that’s like a muffled n floaty version of the main theme ouYghH

“Woah… that’s wild”

Marc seeing the shiva n brushing it off is so…

I didn’t think anything of it the first time but knowing now is just uUggGHh

Steven’s collar is lower cut than Marc’s n that vibes

The way Steven looks when he asks “All of them?” Is so heartbreaking

Marc baby Marc baby Marc bABY I need to holD YOU OH SHIT RORO HIIII

“Why is there a child in a room full of people you’ve killed” GOD BUT HES ALIVE HES THE ONLY ALIVE ONE ITS NOT THE SAME

THE WAY MARC BANGS ON THE MEMORY BC HE KNIWS WHAT UT IS IUGGHHHHHH

“Draw wing”

Layers gators in awhile crocodile

THE SHOT OF MARC THROUGH THE HALL MIRROR THE GREENS OF THE TREES N THEN IT GETYING DIMMER AS IT RAINS

The music swelling n shifting still light n then getting heavy n deep when Steven realizes what’s happening

Marc searching so hard n Steven’s panic rising n Marc looking rigid n scared n tense as his own fear rises

Steven yelling even tho they can’t hear him the water rushing in w Marc’s memory n his breathing over the top of it Steven diving n n Marc’s breath shivering over all of it GOD GOD GOD GOD

Steven at the shiva…. He looks so shaken and empty

The room is warmly lit but the contents are not

The water dripping in the silence

Wendy’s hair going from wavy to straight in grief

Baby Marc… baby….. go back to your room

God

Ok

Steven’s face I’m

God Jesus fuck the emotions this instills just holy shit holy shit

DONT GO UP THE STAIRS

The way each level almost gets more desaturated….

Steven continuing to climb n Marc only being able to watch

The score dude… I’m just…:.::::::::

Their vices when they’re fighting

Teen Marc…. Steven just watching and the tears on teen Marc’s face and Marc pulling him away into a worse memory

Spitting up sand..

OH HEY STEVEN INSEE UR SHOULDER

Marc……. Man

Hey I… care ab these guys a lot

“What happened to you?” And Marc is already moving towards it

ALSO THE SHOT OF THE TEMPLE IUGGHHHB JTS SO COMICS IT MAKES ME YEL

I can’t even

Like

I can’t even describe the feelings of this scene we all know

But like the score doesn’t stop immediately when Khonshu starts talking his voice cuts through it and silences things and makes Marc pause

Khonshu I hate u

Also so many shots r uneven n weird this scene in a good way

“Marc he was… taking advantage of you”

The way we see through Marc’s eyes the edge of Khonshu’s staff before he says yes and then Khonshu is finally visible OUGGHHHH

HAHA THEY SAID THE TITLE YEAHHHH YEAHHH OH HEY HIS CAPE IS GLOWINH DUDE

TAWERET ILYYYY

Marc’s…. Rlly strong n panicked reaction to maybe having to relive the bedroom but Steven just can’t get it bc he doesn’t know he is unable to know and then Steven says it’ll b all his fault n it triggers Marc and he has a mini meltdown just… fuck man

The way the diff Dr Harrows act diff n have diff rules

Proves the psych ward isn’t reality immediately between the sedating vs the not sedating

Again Dr harrow asmr is begrudgingly v nice

Marc just responding by looking at him like 😕

The tomb buster figures… the stuffie, the astronaut on the shelf. The car bunk bed…. I think

Baby Steven…….

And the way Steven copies along bc he rmrs…

Steven being a fictive is still one of my fav things but also it makes sense he does not have a good reaction bc he doesn’t know what it means n his sense of self is so strong n just

God….

PUNCH HIS ASS

Steven… oh baby

I’m like

Listen guys I’m rlly fucking emotional it’s hitting harder than usual rewatched uh um um

Marc’s voice breaks even when he’s so angry and I’m just I

Oh I’m im rlly close to crying lol

Steven’s initial reaction to her being dead is just heart shattering n he’s mumbling n his world is coming down n Marc is trying to calm him bc he realized what he did but Steven can’t hear him through the panic

Steven still being brave in the face of gaslighting n illusions n not believing that Dr harrow is real like Marc did

“Oo nosy…”

Dr harrow I hate u

Steven’s breakdown as the realization of his mother is brought to the surface n he tries to deny it but he can’t the way his dont do that becomes a pleas j his face breaks oh the tear oh god

“My mum is dead” And the line is dead too

“I was just a little boy”

Oscar Isaac the actor you are Jesus shit

The way Steven just watches the memory n breaks n the tears come n he gets it

And the taxi drives away someone mentioned the Jake parallel god

“Marc… all those horrible things that’s he said to you, she was wrong, it wasn’t your fault.”

“Hey… hey… you were just a child. It wasn’t your fault.”

My chest is like twisting n it’s in my throat guys just… Jesus

THEYRE UNBALANCED BC JAKE ISNT THERE N ITS TWO HEARTS N IT WORKS DIFF THAN SINGLETS BABY CMON

This fight hurts so bad just

The faceless sand creature….

Steven working so hard to save Marc

The way Steven covers his mouth when Marc gets hit n he looks so purely scared

AND THEN HE ATEPS UP YES BABY YOU GOT THIS

“SIIIIX!! I prefer cricket :-)”

BEAT THAT THING UPPPPP

Marc’s proud happy in awe face n then he gets grabbed and it is that moment and—Steven falls

And Marc’s voice is hoarse and it’s so distant for Steven and then he realizes and tries to run but it’s too late “stop the boat!” “Wait!” But it doesn’t they can’t n Marc is yelling and Steven reaches out and says his name and is gone

The way that Taweret gasps a lil when the scales balance and then the music just.. lightens… and Marc looks so destroyed in the soft light of the field of reeds, alone and warm and broken….

Yeah I…. No wonder this put me in a shit emotional state for a week Jesus Christ

I never want to relive the wait between moon knight episodes 5 and 6 ever again but truly what the fuck dude that…… episode just

Christ

[thevalleyisjolly]

[Image description: A stylized gif with a centre blue panel that has the yellow text "My tumblr Year In Review." The panel is surrounded by little icons representing different tumblr functions - ask, hashtag, like, post, reply, and reblog. The frame around the panel is a diagonal gradient going from bright green in the top right corner to purple in the bottom left corner. Little animated sketches and doodles in yellow populate the gradient area. The doodles include music notes, rain clouds, stars, skulls, crystals, globes, lightning bolts, curlicues, flowers, a smiling sun, and the text "2021!" in hard angled bubble letters. /end description]

I posted 3,428 times in 2021

746 posts created (22%)

2682 posts reblogged (78%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.6 posts.

I added 3,812 tags in 2021

#dimension 20 - 725 posts

#critical role - 705 posts

#critical role spoilers - 624 posts

#cr liveblog - 427 posts

#d20 spoilers - 309 posts

#the unsleeping city - 233 posts

#lotr - 220 posts

#exu - 208 posts

#tuc ii spoilers - 200 posts

#fantasy high - 161 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#from a social justice standpoint; the mutual aid of it all!  the grassroots level banding together of people against a monolith and winning

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

[Image description: The “It’s more likely than you think” meme.  A head and chest shot of Aabria Iyengar standing confidently is on the left of the image.  Text on the right reads “Common fucking sense?  In my TTRPG campaign?  It’s more likely than you think.” “My” is italicized. /end description]

This applies to the Misfits and Magic D20 season and the Misfits and Magic D20 season ONLY (RIP to the beautiful himbos and bimbos of Exandria Unlimited)

1123 notes • Posted 2021-06-30 23:37:30 GMT

#4

[Image description: The official art for Langston Brown, Alejandra “Al” Matsui, and Catherine “Cat” Lee.  The first image shows Langston, a chubby brown skinned toddler with short curly brown hair and a big smile.  He wears a blue hoodie with orange trim, white pants, and red shoes, and is mid run.  Text reads “Langston Brown, Liz and Kingston’s son.”  The second image shows Al, a brown skinned toddler with puffy brown hair in two buns on the top of her head and a wide open smile.  She wears round green glasses, a blue shirt with the image of a dalmatian puppy wearing a red fireman’s hat beside a red fire hydrant, sparkly purple pants, and red shoes.  She carries a bright green child sized bat and a green whiffleball.  Text reads “Alejandra “Al” Matsui, Esther and Ricky’s daughter.”  The third image shows Cat, a lightskinned toddler with curly dark brown hair and a wide gap toothed smile.  She wears a green headband, a striped yellow shirt, a pink dress with a cat face on it, magenta leggings, and dark shoes.  The outline of mini spectral blue angel wings is visible behind her back.  She stands with her feet wide apart, one hand on her hip and the other punching the air, and a fierce expression.  Text reads “Catherine “Cat” Lee, Sofia and Dale’s daughter.” /end description]

It’s the Unsleeping Toddlers!!!

1483 notes • Posted 2021-03-11 02:37:07 GMT

#3

"There is a very binary view that in genre fiction, people tend to take of people, where they go “Is this character redeemable or not?”  Where if they’re not, I’m gonna cheer while their head gets squashed, and if they are, then every bad thing they did is forgiven and they’re my best friend now.  And that is a wildly binary way to think about how people get to where they are, the complexities of human behaviour, and all that stuff.  One of the biggest takeaways I had from studying ethical philosophy was the idea of, what is redeemability in theory, and what is it in practice?  And the idea that a character, and in fact a person, can be “theoretically redeemable”- by the way, what is redemption mean outside of a religious context?  I don’t know.  “Redeemable” when you’re talking about secular ethics is a way murkier conversation than when you’re talking about the literal religious concept of redemption.  That being said, a person can be “theoretically redeemable” in the way that theoretically, I could take a hammer and smash a mountain into gravel. …  Theoretically, you can smash that mountain apart with a hammer.  Is that gonna happen?  Is that *gonna* happen? … Certain things can be theoretically true, but still never gonna happen. … The conversations around whether a character is good or bad -and by extension, whether people are good or bad- get boiled down in a way that underlines how easy people would like the conversation to be, and that there is a deep ethical desire for simplicity that I fundamentally disagree with on that level."

-Brennan Lee Mulligan, on the redeeming of characters

2410 notes • Posted 2021-02-24 02:43:51 GMT

#2

Forever DM's getting a chance to play: I think I will play the weirdest little guy. They will alternate between unpredictable agents of chaos and tugging on everyone's heartstrings. Sometimes both at the same time. This is my inalienable right.

5205 notes • Posted 2021-07-01 00:28:02 GMT

#1

A non-comprehensive list of people the Mighty Nein have considered contacting/retrieving as allies in the fight against Lucien, a legendary foe with a known anti-magic cone:

Essek Thelyss (wizard)

Allura Vysoren (wizard)

Yussa Erenis (wizard)

Halas Lutagran (wizard)

Astrid (wizard)

Eadwulf (wizard/paladin)

5739 notes • Posted 2021-02-05 08:00:58 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[middle-class-trash]

Rise of the Titans liveblog!!!

that intro made me unexpectedly emotional

So if Blinky is narrating, he can't die, right? Right????

BRO THE SUBWAY SCENE!!!! We're getting right fuckin into it!!!

Steve, my son!!!

I wish Toby wasn't a constant punchline 🙃 it just makes me not take his character seriously

CLAIRE!!!!!!

Something about Douxie decking Skrael at the first opportunity is just so sexy of him

Jim is incredibly brave but it's really reckless to go hand-to-hand with a demigod without proper armor

My heart goes BUMBUMBUMBUM when Douxie looks out the traincar window

Sexy traincar tracks spell WHO

THE WRECKAGE AWWWW

Oh my gosh the people stuck in the magic circle because they wouldnt get out of the way

NO NO NO DOUXIE NO

So they were arrested that early?? Jeez

Nari's such a cutie

"None of us will be talking to you" *cut to Toby spilling every bean*

TOBY'S FACE AT THE END HAHHAHAHA

Something about Nari's voice coming out of Douxie's body is so deeply odd

Oh hey, Krel to the rescue

AREA 49 HAKSHDKSKD

"And your mom."

Oh my gosh he's still broken from Wizards 😂

The Guardians are just dead set on pissing off local authorities huh

JIM!!!

STRICKLER?????

BARBARAAAAA

Stricklake supremacy 😌 they both look so good

Claire listening in 😭😭😭 she's so cute

AWWWWW ENGAGED ENGAGED ENGAGED

......does that give them death flags? Fuck. Fuuuuck fuck fuck fuck. It totally does.

AWWW DOUXIE!NARI HUGGING ARCHIE

Aja!!!!

Your majesty!!

Oh yikes, here's that running gag everyone was talking about.. pregnant Steve

Oh hey, Eli's hot now. We been knew 😂

"Mazel tov!" HAHA

Poor Jim needing a bunch of support to walk 🥺 he's such a trooper

I will simply pass away if Blinky dies

I hope Douxie is okay, we haven't seen him in Nari's body and that makes me ✨nervous✨

OH JKJK

Nari is so goddamn pretty

"Only your presence, not your commitment" is such a rapey saying

"Abra-cadabra, buttsnacks" I love that he still says that 🥺🥺 he loves his friends so much

"Do your worst" *cue both Douxie and Nari absolutely screaming in pain*

Krohnisfere? Alrighty then, that's the first mission

"I wouldn't be so sure of that" AWWW

They fixed the amulet???? DUUUUDE

"For the good of all..." 😭😭😭😭

"Or I could lock onto Nari and portal us there" *dead fucking silence*

I hate how Toby's used as a constant punchline.. a penny? Really?

TRAINTRACK MAGIC CIRCLE GO BRRRR

Poor Nari 🥺 Douxie's in so much distress

Oh no, the new amulet isn't working?? Fuckk

That absolutely gorgeous screencap of pissed Aja

Part of me is glad Nari was forced to do this and wasn't actually a traitor

Ice titan awakening sequence? Ice titan awakening sequence.

Oh Nari. Oh sweetie

Oh my gosh she's fucking tied to her titan

Boiling water!!! Or underwater explosion, that works too. Much more dramatic but that's Bellroc's style

Oh wow Steve actually has a bump?? What the fuck???

Oooh, TrollDragons?

Charlie!!!

"We still don't have a trollhunter" Aja, honey, not helpful

"Does he even trust himself? AJA, HONEY, NOT HELPFUL

Barbara being proud of her son 😭😭

OOH fusing excalibur with the armor?

Aja is so full of confidence, it's a good look for her

Steve being preggo is..really fucking weird. When they said

AWWW BLINKY AND AARRRGHHH

Your honor, I love them

OOH IS IT SOFT JLAIRE TIME

Ohhhh it's soft Jlaire time

He's always looking out for his mom 🥺

"I will always be here (head), and here (heart)" just fuck me up fam

Charlie!!!

Zong-Shi?

"Only death will come to those who go looking for it" oh dear

"The troll with many eyes" how does Charlie know Blinky? 😂

AYYY this where the banner that I found first is from!!! it was so cool seeing my screenshot circulate when we were starved for content 😂😂 everyone was posting various rott icons and banners that they got hoping they'd find a new one

Oh dear.. government

Blinky dear they can't understand you

"Holy frijole" Claire I simply adore you

WOW THAT'S PRETTYYYYY

Troll slaves???

So is Zong-Shi this ugly ass pear-lookin ass

Aja chilling with Jim even though she has doubts is an interesting strategic choice

Douxie, AARRRGHHH, and Nomura? Talk about rarepare

NOMURA CATCHING HIM 😭😭 SEXYYYY

DOUXIE RESCUING NOMURA 😭😭😭😭 SEXXYYYYY

If I havent said it yet, the animation is breathtaking

OH SHIT JIM

aaaaand here come those frozen wings

Nari cant be in control of herself, there's no way. She's still tied to the titan for Pete's sake

NOMURA????

Please dont let this be a sacrifice

PLEASE NO

BOTH CHANGELINGS????

STRICKLANDER??????

No on-screen death, so it's not real. No on-screen death, do it"# notbsmejelreal

NO ON-SCREEN DEATH BUT IT'S NOT REAL

THEYRE TALKING AHOUT HIM PAST-TENSE NOOOO

THEY RBOGUHT UP HIS DADDDDDD

"There's no revelation I can give you" is a great way of saying he's not relevant, genuinely

Oh wow this guy's freaky

Ohhhh so the green thing from the trailers and promo photos is the Krohnisfere

Archie to the rescue!!!

"That's my boy!" AWWE

"Claire nooo, no no no no YESSS, I'm free!!!" Blinky, never change 😂

Oh wow, they're already in contact with Bellroc's titan??

Different note, but the titan's designs are just different enough to make them interestun

VARVATOS??? Okay jk somehow it's gun robot lmfao

WAIT NEVER MIND HAHAHAH HI BUD

....if the bridge falls, can't Charlie just fly them across

LMAO he just saw his death?? That is what he wanted to see 🤷🏻‍♀️

It's too early to celebrate, there's no way Bellroc is down after just a few pinches

Yeahhh

Oh dear... is Varvatos in danger?

Claire being the warrior of the group is incredible and sexy and hhnnngggg

Toby is a Hufflepuff. I will not be answering questions

OH WOW THAT'S HOW HE BURNED HIS HAND??? THE HONRGAZEL?????

ARCHIE SAID GOODBYE??? NO NO NO NO NO

Douxie's gonna be a flat mess!!!

God, plus Nomura and Stricklander

NOOOO DOUXIE YOU BIG SWEETIE

Oh my gosh this is the scene with Douxie trying to connect with Nari, it has to be

"I need to try again" AWWW HONEY

That shot of Mexico was incredibly stereotypical

DOUXIE SWEETHEART 🥺🥺

He's trying to hold her hand???? AWWWW

Oh my gosh he's being choked 😳

NARI BABY!!!!

The huggos 🥺🥺

Jim being frustrated is totally realistic

Wait wait wait waittt do they have the entire titan at their disposal?

"There's absolutely nothing all the way out here" cue a titan. Any of them.

And there it is.

CLAIRE SUPREMACY!!!!!!!

White haired Claire? White haired Claire???

Oh dear it's like.. a little over halfway and there's so much left that could happen

COACH. COOOOACH

OH THANK GOD!!! Steve doesn't need another paternal figure dying on him

Time for Skrael to fuck shit up 😬

I find it interesting how Bellroc and Skrael's titans are both bipedal but Nari's is on four legs, much more animalistic

NARI, NOOOOO PLEASE NO

At least Skrael's done????

We kinds knew Bellroc was the final boss but NOT LIKE THIS

DOUXIE SCREAMING FOR HER

NOOOOOOO

No more running. GODDAMNIT

The three can no longer unite but Bellroc can still fcuk shit up

A HIDDEN PAGE??? FUCK THE WORLD IS TO BE REFORGED WITH FIRE

THE HEARTSTONE??????

Oh shit, the explanation for why Arcadia's the center of everything!!

The only heartstone?? Really???? That's scary as shit, trolls could go instinct without a reliable hearthstone!!

EXCALIBUR TIMEEE

JIMMMMMM

Come on honey, you can do it!!

Aja, honey, I love you so much but now's not the time

THE HEARTSTONE???? FUCK DUDE

.......Steve

Eli the midwife?? ...gross

Jim, my love, my baby boy!!!

The nine of them!!!

AWW BLINKY BEING THE BEST DAD

THEY WORK TOGETHER 😭😭😭😭

FUCK YEAH!!!!!!

"Quiet desperation" is a great word for it

Are we coming on to the big final battle?

Ohnoohnoohno they all said the thing 😭😭😭 someone's gonna die. At least one more is gonna die.

HE'S DRIVINGGGG. LOVE THAT FOR HIM

STICKY SPELL TIME!!!!!!

"Some sort of stickum!" Bro 😂😂

I love how he calls them all Trollhunters 😭 throwback to the OG show where the three of them were all called that

Aja Terron supremacy

Oh it's weird.. it's very weird. Why did Steve have to be pregnant again

Oh dear, there's half an hour left.. this has to be the final battle

JIM

Varvatos shielding Claire and Krel 🥺

Fuck, man, people are getting thrown left and right

DOUXIE MY LOVE

Oh here we fucking go, rematch

NEW AMULET???

Jim's about to get royally fucked up

LIKE THAT

FUCK

WHY IS SHE TAKING HIM??? GOD NO

Anti-magic beacon??

Helloooo that's smart asf

This gives Mount Doom vibes

"Embrace your loved ones for the final time" FUCK MAN STOP IT

"I already was" DAMN RIGHT BUD

NEW AMULETTTT

GO GET JIM GO GET 'IM

DAYLIGHT ARMOR!!!!!!

He was ready to just sacrifice himself like THAT

DAYLIGHT ARMORRRRR WITH EXCALIBUR??????? FUUUUCK

Jim being great at combat is just the best fucking thing

Oh fuck. OH FUCK.

STABBED??????

PLEASE NO, GOD NO

FUUUUCK

"I'm powerless" "You get used to it" WE DONT HAVE TIME TO UNPACK ALL OF THAT

JIM HONEY PLEASE DONT DIE

Is that....is that it?? Oh dear god, is that it????

JIM WHERE ARE YOU

I'm calling it now it's too early to be celebrating

Oh god the weird babies

WHERE IS TOBY

WHERE

NO

MY JAW FUCKING DROPPED

NO WAY, NO FUCKING WAY

HE'S GETTING A DYING MONOLOGUE??????

ALWAYS HAVE BEEN, ALWAYS WILL BE

"Itll be the two of us at the end" WHY DOES THAG SEEM LIKE JIM WILL GO OUT TIO

THERE'S NO WAY TOBY JUST DIED

THHERE'S NO WAY

That was sad as fuck but in a narrative way I hope it's permanent

Oh dear, Jim's going back????

Oh shit

WWHAT IS HE DOING

NOOOOO

"I have cherished every moment with you" STOP IT HE'S HIS FATHER

"I FYOU WERE MY OWN SON" STOPPPPPP

WHAT'S HAPONEINGGGGG

CLAIRE

NOOOO

THIS IS WHERE IM SOBBING

THIS IS WHERE IM LOSUNG IT

"Dont give up on me" FUCK STOPPPP

"I WILL ALWAYS BE HERE AND HERE" FUCK IT STOPPPPP

"I would date you for a hundred lifetimes" IS REALLY BEING TESTED HUH

THERE ARE 10 MINUTES ELFT WHAT THEBFUCK

AND WE'RE BACK TO TROLLHUNTERS?.????

HUHHHH

Fuck, man. FUCK, MAN.

Oh, Toby. Ohhhh Toby

CLAIRE 🥺

ROMEO AND JULIET!!!!

Oh my fucking god

"IF YOUD COME OVER TO DINNER" AYYYYY

His smile at Steve 🥺

HE'S HAVING TOBY TAKE THE CANAL???? But wouldnt the amulet still call for Jim?????

"Nothing interesting ever happens in Arcadia" VERY FUCKING FUNNY

Destiny is a gift. Some go their entire lives living in an existence of quiet desperation, never learning the truth- that what feels as though a burden pushing down upon our shoulders is actually the sense of purpose that lifts us to greater heights. Never forget that fear is but the precursor to valor. That to strive and triumph in the face of fear is what it means to be a hero. Don't think. Become.

.......it actually called his name. I can't believe it actually called his name.

The fuck is that ending??? Let Jim REST

[maryellencarter]

SO! A week or two ago I got the DVDs for both seasons of "Justice League: The Animated Series", which I hadn't seen in ten years and remembered loving a lot. Spoiler: I still love it a lot. I put off watching it for a while because I was scared I wouldn't, but then I watched it pretty much straight through without even stopping to liveblog.

So. THOUGHTS! ^_^ Any of y'all who've ever shared a fandom with me know I'm always around for one particular character. In this case, that's J'onn J'onzz, the big green guy, whose official comics codename (sensibly not used on the show) is Martian Manhunter.

(There's a bit in one of the tie-in comics where a parent is telling their kid "don't be scared, honey, he won't hurt you, that's the uhh... Martian Maneater..." which has never ceased to amuse me.)

Anyway, we all know I have a tendency to give reviews in the vein of "Good story but no werewolves", and it must be granted that I never did bother watching Justice League Unlimited because Carl Lumbly (J'onn's voice actor, Minnesota born and raised with Jamaican parents, which is apparently how you get a Martian accent I couldn't place to anywhere on Earth) wasn't a regular anymore. But y'know, it's a really good ensemble team too, even if I like Tim Daly's Superman (from Superman: The Animated Series in the same animated universe) a lot better than George Newbern's. Or, well, I did. I haven't heard *him* in ten years either. Anyway! Off topic.

SO ANYWAY. Obviously, spoilers hereabouts, although it's what, fifteen, twenty years old by now? But if you care about spoilers for somewhat elderly TV, you might not be following me anyhow.

So the meta premise, just in case anybody was unfamiliar, is thuswise: First there was Batman: The Animated Series, in which Mark Hamill was the best Joker while not being an asshole as a person, because he is a competent actor and not a dickwad. Then there was Superman: The Animated Series, which I remember as being a delight and I want to watch it again too someday. Then, because apparently if you have Batman and Superman the next step is the entire Justice League, there was this.

The actual premise is, that during an alien invasion of Earth, Superman and Batman rescue a prisoner, J'onn J'onzz, the last survivor of the Martian society the invader aliens wiped out. (J'onn and Clark get little bits of bonding over the last-of-their-kinds thing but I've always wanted more. In a fandom auction I once donated $60 for a fic on the topic, but life happened and I do not hold it against the person. Still a little sad though. It's not something I've ever quite been able to write myself.) J'onn has a whole grab-bag of superpowers including telepathy, with which he summons additional heroes The Flash (speedster, this one is twentyish goofball Wally West), Green Lantern (specifically John Stewart, a black ex-Marine), Wonder Woman, and Hawkgirl (a winged humanoid-alien woman with an energy mace). Together, they fight crime! Mostly.

Specific episodes: I'm going to use "episode" to refer to the runtime covered by a single title so I don't have to say "two-parter" or "three-parter" every single time, because this show had literally only one single-part episode out of the whole 52 episodes.

* Secret Origins, three-parter: In which the Justice League is formed and repels the invasion of Earth by the aliens who wiped out J'onn's people. A very strong start, good character intros. I will never be over the very small worldbuilding fact that J'onn is rescued by Superman and Batman, and has seen nobody else on Earth yet but invader aliens (these are what used to be called the White Martians but the show does not use this name either which I think was a wise choice), so when he shapeshifts from his more alien "natural" Martian form to the look which will be his default for the series, he chooses a briefs-and-cape look because based on the two examples he's seeing, that's what Earth people wear. It's not explicitly called out, but it's a great way to make it a little less... comic-booky that you have no less than three extra-beefy guys with almost identical costume silhouettes here.

I think the arc between Batman and J'onn is one of my favorite parts of this, the way Batman starts out being like "I still don't trust him" and winds up trusting him enough that it's their teamwork which saves the world this go-round. Also, speaking as a fan who likes me some whump, can we talk about the scene where J'onn is being mindprobed with all those tentacles under his skin? I have so fucking many feels about that scene, okay. God, that whole climactic sequence is so damn good. And his tiny lil smile at the end of the last episode! I do love me some microexpressions, nonetheless that they are animated. (I can't draw so I am constantly boggled by just the skill it has to take to draw a character so on-model that varying one line by a few pixels Says Things.)

* In Blackest Night, two-parter: The one where the extremely Kirby-designed cop robots frame Green Lantern into believing he blew up an inhabited planet. Introduces several alien members of the Green Lantern Corps. Flash trying and failing to act as GL's lawyer is fairly embarrassment-squicky to me; many of the things anybody does with Flash on this show are fairly embarrassment-squicky, although he does get some great moments. René Auberjonois does two voices, as a spherical Green Lantern and as the "witness" who helps frame GL. The climactic scene is great -- sometimes the Green Lantern ditty just doesn't work, but between the sound design and the animation and Phil Lamarr's voice acting, this scene blows me away every time. I feel like this one could have been shorter though.

* The Enemy Below, two-parter: In which (blond) Aquaman guest-stars, J'onn takes on the first of many roles where he acts as bait by impersonating a villain's target, and the thing where Aquaman cuts off his own hand to escape a manacle is very tastefully handled for a kids' show. I probably would have found that scene way too suspenseful and traumatic as a kid but I was an extremely sensitive small child. Opinions on this episode: I don't really have many. This universe's Aquaman is a *dick* who appears to live by the rule that you must always fight a superhero when you meet one on the street before explaining your business. I always squee when somebody turns out to be J'onn, because I've usually forgotten. (He usually is people and not animals or, like Odo more than once, a bag. I wonder if he has some conservation of mass thing going on or if it's just easier to animate when you keep your same basic arrangement of limbs.)

* Injustice for All, two-parter: Lex Luthor, dying of kryptonite poisoning, puts together the Injustice Gang to try to destroy the Justice League. He didn't invite the Joker, but Hulk expy and heavy hitter Solomon Grundy is also voiced by Mark Hamill, so the Joker naturally turns up around the point where Luthor captures Batman, commentating on Luthor's misguidedness in keeping Bats alive and generally providing a running peanut gallery. Clancy Brown and Mark Hamill are both always fun, so this one is pretty entertaining.

* Paradise Lost: Wonder Woman backstory-ish episode. A sorcerer turns the other Amazons to stone, then blackmails Diana into stealing four artifacts for him, which he assembles into a key to free the god Hades from Tartarus. Notable mainly for the extreme mangling of Greek mythic cosmology into an aggressively Christian shape. Not good. It does have J'onn and Flash teamed for a bit, which is interesting, and J'onn gets to one-punch a giant magic brass cobra, but that's about all there is to speak for it. It looks like the writer also did my very least favorite two-parter of the whole series, unless this is some sort of Alan Smithee situation, because the name is Joseph Kuhr and I have a half-memory I can't catch that there is *something* more than coincidence in the whole, you know. "Joe-Kuhr" thing?

* War World: Apparently this one was pretty nearly universally hated. I do not hate it, because the concept "Superman and J'onn are accidentally blown across the galaxy together and sold to an alien gladiatorial arena" is something I am 110% down for, but I wanted a lot more interaction between them and possibly a lot more fic. I can't decide if I actually want to ship them, but they're obviously very close and I want to see more than snippets of that, dammit.

That's halfway through season one. Imma go sleep. more later.

[ks-caster]

Beth Liveblogs Black Widow

Bought that premium access on Disney+ so I can have the privilege of pausing for snacks and using subtitles as needed - so let’s go! 

Beth’s Spoiler-Free Review: Overall I thoroughly enjoyed the movie - the plot was compelling, the characters were likable, and the stunts were really excellent. I felt like hair and makeup dropped the ball on realism multiple times which I was sad about, because how she looks seems to be pretty important to Nat so I expected it to be done well in her movie. 

I did not like the way they framed the tail end (denouement - obviously because this movie is mid-series we know how it ends to an extent) - I felt like the connect-up to Infinity War was lackluster, especially compared to how enjoyable and dynamic the rest of the film was.

Spoilery live-reactions are under the cut. Click at own risk! Feel free to rebagel with your own impressions, thoughts, jokes and rebuttals!

The movie begins with a young Nat with blue dyed hair and visible roots, showing her natural red. Do you know how hard it is to get natural red out of hair, enough to make it blue and not green? And I’m supposed to believe that a middle-school age girl in 1995 Ohio had access to these chemicals? I’ll give her the white hair in IW/Endgame because she’s an adult with a lot of experience as a spy altering her appearance. But as a child? In the 90s? While her family is apparently in hiding? Sus.

The scene with Alexei laying on the on the wing while Nat learns to fly? AMAZING stunts. Amazing. AND someone in an action movie is finally smart enough to shoot the tires.

Nice skills on young Nat, getting the gun. Since we know from Endgame that Nat’s father is named Ivan, we know that Alexei isn’t really her dad. She also refers to presumably the red room as going “back.” Was she lent out to these agents to legitimize their family?

-0-

Nice knife moves, Yelena - I love the hand switch.

Ooooh so she was being mind controlled and the red stuff freed her? Interesting.

-0-

Nat is in Norway - visit Thor! He’d love to have you. (I’m mixing up my timeline, aren’t I?)

Supplies Dude whose name I didn’t catch refers to the Avengers breakup as a divorce - I kinda love it. It’s accurate!

BUDAPEST omg are we finally going to get the story?? Are we??

Box dye? I’m supposed to believe she got all that red out of her hair with flippin’ Loreal? Really? And that toner isn’t even the color she ultimately went - it’s too yellow. Sus.

-0-

Oop, looks like Nat got caught up in Yelena’s desertion.

Do not give Nat your metal frisbee, robocop - she’s been around Steve long enough that she knows how to use it.

I laughed out loud when she did the string him up thing with the cables - literal spider move, I love it!

Mystery box is empty - classic bait and switch.

-0-

BUDAPEST - WE ARE IN BUDAPEST - IT’S HAPPENING PEOPLE

Nat closing the door behind her is a small thing but I appreciate it - no sneaking up behind her.

When Yelena throws Nat in the kitchen and her feet hit the door and she spins before she hits the ground? That was a helluva stunt.

Oooooh honey. No body left to check is ALWAYS movie code for they lived.

Dreykov’s daughter? Another hint from Avengers 2012? C’mon, movie.

Riding the chimney down? Another incredible stunt. 

Dreykov can scan his soldiers’ bodies and terminate them if they’re too damaged to keep fighting? Big yikes. With Nat where she is character development wise, the stakes are now much higher because if she injures an opponent they may be killed remotely.

“Do you want me to chase him down and un-steal it?”

The car door under the bike was an excellent stunt - as was the car going into the subway. Though I’ve never seen a subway entrance big enough to admit a car.

Who hasn’t wanted to slide down the middle to avoid the crowded escalators lol.

Yelena making fun of Nat’s sexy poses I am LIVING omg.

Running water for wounds. RUNNING WATER. NOT ALCOHOL. The vodka goes on the INSIDE for the pain - the running water cleans the OUTSIDE. If there’s a convenience store then there’s a bathroom, with running water. Cleansing with something like alcohol is a LAST RESORT and you do not look like you’re at that point resource-wise. I thought these ladies were supposed to be highly trained in all of the things?

“Could be fun though.” “I saw where he put the keys” “Top drawer green cabinet.” I love their chaos.

Yelena’s vest and its pockets and the resulting conversation are positively majestic.

“You are sensitive.” “You’re a very annoying person.”

-0-

Do! Not! Move! Around! Like! That! While! Getting! A! Tattoo!!!! That poor artist was trying his best and Alexei just...

Ooooh was Red Guardian like Captain Russia? Interesting.

“Just don’t make a scene.” “You made a scene didn’t you.”

David Harbor running up that wall and then wiping out after the guard shocks him... I really loved that stunt, especially since they don’t show him being all super cut - he’s a big guy! He’s allowed to have fat over his muscles and still be a strong dude! I love it.

“Such a poser.” Girl, you need to meet Loki - he does a lot of hair flips too lol.

The sibling energy between the girls during the rescue!!!

“Whooooooa... this would be a cool way to die.” Yelena, I’m not necessarily disagreeing with you but get your head in the game girl.

Poor Alexei - he never gets to do the dramatic escape from *inside* of the aircraft.

Hang on, no ovaries? So all of these women are now in immediate, surgically-induced menopause? The uterus part makes sense if the intent was to prevent them from getting pregnant if they have sex during a mission, but, what, they gotta be on estrogen supplements for the rest of their lives? That’s just really poor planning. Like it was hilarious the way Yelena went into the biology of it to make Alexei uncomfortable, but that really doesn’t make sense to do to your superhero kids. It’s just bad science.

Love that Yelena keeps her vest even after she changes into her matching white flight suit. That vest better make it to the end of the movie.

-0-

“Honey, we’re home.” I 100% expected her to shoot him on sight tbh. it would have been funny.

Alexei squeezing into the uniform is such a post-pandemic feel. Also all of the fancy braids at that table; I see where Natasha got her propensity for them.

Animal cruelty warning, ugh. Poor piggy Alexei.

Oooh the photo album and Natasha remembered staging the pictures; they’re emotional for her but in a different way.

I wonder if robocop’s shield is actually Alexei’s.

The singing between Alexei and Yelena was a really beautiful moment because it was neither auto-tuned-good nor hilariously bad - it felt really real, especially the way Yelena’s so choked up she can barely make sounds come out.

Uh-oh, mama has one of those monitor your vitals and kill your ass suits. The suits I understand - the eyeliner though... when and why did she do her makeup?? That’s not really the thing that comes to mind for me when I’m getting ready to do something athletic, like say kidnapping my supersoldier fake family.

“This is a much less cool way to die.” Also WTF why would they do that. Wouldn’t it be easier to get the information out of her while her brain is still attached to, y’know, her mouth??

CLEVER CLEVER CLEVER they switched outfits and faces ooooooh like mother like daughter.

The door opening as Alexei is leaning against it dramatically bahahahaha

I love the plan. I’m thoroughly weirded out that Melina has a red wig just lying around that perfectly immitates Natasha though. 

“Yelena, it’s mama. You have a two-inch blade in your belt.”

Oh. My. God.

Antonia.

A pheromone lock preventing them from hurting them if they’re close enough to smell him - I like it. It’s clever and new.

Bahahaha poser! You posed I saw you! Still love the vest.

Natasha is really good at manipulating people’s emotions to get what she wants - I mean, scary good. So if she’s provoking Dreykov into beating her up, there’s a reason. 

“Using the only resource the world has too much of - girls.” Kill him. 

-0-

When I say I whooped out loud... SEVERING THE NERVE. Thank you for your cooperation. YAAAAAAS QUEEN.

-0-

“Slight change of plans - we are going into a controlled crash.” The way she said that was just so mom-like omg!

-0-

The grenade as a delivery system was super smart - but yikes what if she’d mistimed it and blew Natasha up? Also, after the beating she took and how hard she had to wack her own face into the desk to sever her olfactory nerve and the amout of blood we saw her leave behind from doing that, her face should be a LOT more messed up, come on makeup department.

“Get as far away from here as possible.” And then keep going because General I-Collect-Supersoldiers-Like-Stamps Ross is about to turn up at your location looking for trouble and he’d snap you ladies up like there’s a fire sale and you’re going out of stock.

This crash doesn’t look all that controlled, Melina. I’m starting to suspect that most of the widows won’t live long enough to make their own decisions...

All of the aerial stunts were amaaaaaazing - the way Nat slowed herself by sliding down the panels so Antonia could catch up with her and she could deploy her parachute... 

The vest survived the movie!!!

Fuuuuuck Ross is showing up and he sucks and I hate him and I’m super worried that he’s gonna take the vest from Nat if he takes her into custody. Please don’t let her lose the vest. 

Okay, there is now zero reason for Nat to stay behind. They have an aircraft. She had plenty of time to just board it and leave?

-0-

Okay okay okay Ross did not get her and did not take the vest. But am I supposed to believe she bleached her hair, toned it blonde, and then re-bleached and re-toned it to silver? Who does that? That would be terrible for her hair. Her scalp would be burned all to hell from the amount of chemicals needed to not only get all that red out but THEN get the blonde toner out. Y’know what color silver toner is? Blue/purple. Y’know what happens when you mix that with yellow? Green. And not a nice green either (I speak from experience). No. Her hair at the end of the movie? Cancelled. 

-0-

SHE GOT THE DOG!!!

Oh, ouch. Big ouch. I hurt like a lot now. This is so not an okay way to end the -

...

Countess I-Forgot-Your-Name-Already?

Oh no. Oh no. That’s worse. That’s a lot worse. We are now setting up the Hawkeye series and I while I’m horrified that this was how they ended the film, I gotta say that’s going to make for some wonderful angst in that series on both Clint and Yelena’s parts and I am here for it!

OVERALL IMPRESSION

I really, really enjoyed this movie, I thought the story was compelling, the stunts were really excellent, and I liked the character dynamics and the twist

I did not like the ending - it just sort of fell off quickly and didn’t feel satisfying after an otherwise really fun movie. I also take issue with the hair and makeup as shown among the characters, as seen in my several rants to that effect.

I would have liked to have seen a few more childhood/training flashbacks, and absolutely would have loved a cameo from Jeremy Renner (not just his voice) and to see him and Nat meeting and him giving her the whole dad speech that he does so well - bonus points if she could have then quoted him to Yelena or Antonia, showing the way that multiple people had a formative effect on her (an answer to the “The Avengers aren’t really your family either” comment).

[kariachi]

This is it y’all, a day literal months in the coming- here and now I shall liveblog Dragon’s Kin, by Anne and Todd McCaffrey. By which I mean I will read Dragon’s Kin and take note of anything interesting, valuable, or just that comes to my mind. I have never read this book, it’s still in the plastic packaging it came in, I have never read a Todd book.

We’ll see if I survive.

Before I even open the damn thing, I am looking at the image of the McCaffreys on the back and let me say they look like they should be villains in a comedy western.

A Pass brings with it increased earthquakes, tsunamis, and volcanic activity, due to the whole ‘other celestial body coming in hot’ thing. Which actually makes a lot of sense, certainly more than anything else relating to Threadfall. (“charred bone” is this a fungus or a wildfire)

“Under the leadership of the Lord Holders and Weyrleaders-” *screams into aether*

It took until 16 years prior to the 3rd Pass for the Northern Continent to run out of surface coal and have to start actually digging for the shit

Everybody: Whers? Bah, not much to them, not good for much. Journeyman Miner Natalon: But consider, they might be awesome MasterMiner Britell: Hmmm, I’m keeping an eye on this one...

Chapter 1: “In early morning light I see: A distant dragon come to me”

We meet our main character, Kindan. His sister is getting married, good for her. Shame about the plot that’s going to happen later.

Having a watchwher gets you private housing. Also aw, the wher took their name from Kindan’s father that’s so sweet.

This just in, two boys can’t hang with dragons, settle instead for the simple pleasure of watchwher washing

Zenor: Dragons look like they’re soft, not like watchwhers Kindan: Bitch-

So our biggest asshole so far is a Tarik and honestly I’d be sending him back to the Hall with a nice long report of exactly how much of a fuckwit he is. And I’ve only known him a few pages.

And we meet the other major character- Nuella- who is apparently Somebody though who we have no idea

Oh gods Kindan’s mother is dead, his sister is marrying and leaving, and his father and Dask’s fates are in the fucking summary. Boy is about to have a time.

He has brothers! Well thank fuck.

Whers have external ears

Also I have only known Dask for two paragraphs but I love him

“Then Dask gave a little happy chirp, flapped his wings once, and vanished.” Whers can between, alone and from the ground. Apparently Dask does it all the time go he can avoid the lights from the camp.

Dask is brown, I was figuring but nice to know

Kindan, assuming dragons are harder to wash because they’re fucking massive and need oiling and shit (whers, the dragonkin for the common working fucker)

Chapter 2: “It’s skin is bronze, it’s eyes are green; It’s the loveliest dragon I’ve ever seen”

Damn Kindan’s family is a mess, his brothers are all dicks, his sisters are supposeldy dicks but we haven’t seen them, and the only decent fuckers are leaving or dying

Kindan’s Sister: Kaylek, my brother who loves to sing but couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket, you shall sing at my wedding Master Harper: Over my dead body he will!

Kindan’s siblings may be shit, but he’ll be damned if he allows them to talked bad about by some non-relative and he’s stubborn as a wher himself about it

Am I reading a fucking fairytale film? The new Harper is a dick until he realises ‘oh wait, this kid isn’t complete shit, I shouldn’t have said the seriously horrible things I did’

(Seriously “to think your mother died giving birth to you”, I want Dask to eat him too)

Well it’s nice to see that the ‘whers fly at night because the air is thicker’ thing is only speculation by people with no fucking teachings with regard to that shit. At least so far.

Kindan really just went on a paragraph long internal monologue about the value of miners to the function and survival of Pern and for all he doesn’t in his heart want to be one I kinda want to see him grow into it now. Stories of stepping away from what’s expected of you and forging your own path are great (I’ve been writing some) but stories of falling in love with what before looked like something to be avoided can also be nice.

And now we get a two paragraph internal monologue about how awesome whers are. Best miners ever.

“Traditionally, the marriage ceremony was performed in the morning, timed so that as the couple completed their marriage vows, the sun would rise, signifying the warmth of the new relationship and how it would lighten not only the bride and groom but also all those associated with them.” Awwww!!!!

“However, such a ceremony would mean Dask could not attend. So Jofri had come up with the idea of performing the ceremony with the setting sun, instead, and lighting a bonfire as the final vows were made.” Awwwwwww!!!!!!!

For all the shit you hear and see relating to whers in earlier and later periods (that they’re ugly, and disliked, and kept chained up)  it’s so nice to see Dask truly be part of the family, so much so that they changed the fucking wedding to accommodate him. I want this to be the tradition of handler families now. And then we have to remember that one of the other handlers for the camp straight up fucking left because Tarik was being a dick to his wher and he wasn’t having it. Yes, give me wher love.

Oh my gods Dask flying about with a glow in his claws to act as a spotlight as his handler’s daughter walks down the aisle this is so sweet!

And he’s singing along to the music!

He’s doing the groom too! Dask is a gift!

“For now that these two are one, we are all more,“ Master Zist intoned. He placed Silstra’s hand in Terregar’s and kissed each lightly on the cheek. “To Terregar and Silstra!”

The crowd stood up and roared back: “To Terregar and Silstra!”

“Long life and happiness!” Master Zist intoned.

“Long life and happiness!” the crowd roared back.

Kindan and Nuella officially meet.

Nuella, taking advantage of Kindan not wanting to get given chores on this the night of his sister’s wedding and her own presumed misbehavior to get him to keep her well away from any authority.

Nuella is sheltered as fuck, she hasn’t even seen a mashed potato before

Ah, she’s the twin of the big boss’s son. Don’t know why she’s being so fucking hidden I mean good fuck, but, at least we know who she is.

Aw, Zenor is her bestfriend. Not that she has many options but still

Seven fucking brothers! And an unknown number of sisters! No wonder their mother died having the last one, she birthed at least nine surviving children! Do you know how many she’d have had to have to get those numbers? Was she born pregnant, wtf?

Chapter 3: “Watch-wher, whatch-wher in the night; Guard our Hold, keep it right; When the morning sun does come; Watch-wher, then you job is done”

Aw, Kindan’s relationship with the his brothers is healing

Also Zist is a fucking taskmaster. He gets results but damn, man, chill.

The big boss’s son is apparently a sickly child

Dask has been in A Mood which is a never a good sign when you’re talking about your security critter

Miners’ children all just ‘it’s too quiet, something is wrong’ like they’re fucking birds. Not that they’re wrong, mind, but still

Welp, bad air was released and sparked before Dask could warn the miners (I assume a pocket got opened as somebody else struck some stone) and now we’ve got a cave-in. Dask got out and is now killing himself trying to rescue the miners.

Damn his father and his brothers in one day. And Dask fucking dying in his arms after managing to save the survivors despite bleeding out with his handler dead (which, even if whers can outlive their handlers he had to have felt, he’s dragonkin he’d have noticed the bond breaking, he was doing this despite knowing that he wouldn’t find Danil alive on the other side. Was he this dedicated to his work, was he hoping to save Danil’s boys, we’ll never know).

Pour one out for Danil, who did his damnedest to take care of his children, and for Dask, who was too damn good for us.

Zenor survived, but his father is also dead. He and Kaylek saved the poor boy’s life in exchange for their own. Gods the last thoughts that must’ve been going through that man’s head, as he realized that the mine was collapsing and he had brought his son in with him despite him not being near old enough...

Seriously y’all I’m crying

Chapter 4: “I am too big to cry; And my voice is too shy; To sing my sad, sad song; Or say the words I long; To say to you- good-bye, good-bye.”

The book says Kindan is the youngest of nine. It also says he has seven brothers and plural sisters. And the sisters at least lasted long enough to give him shit growing up. The book lies to me.

Okay so, Kindan’s got two siblings remaining- Jakris and Tofir- one of whom has been fostered to I think a sister of theirs? Kindan doesn’t note who ‘Terra and her husband’ are otherwise so I assume it’s another older sister and another of which has been fostered to Crom Hold where he’ll be learning art and maybe someday mapmaking. Kindan is still in the camp.

Zenor wants to take over his dad’s role of miner like boy you are ten stop

Ah, Kindan wants to stay.

If somebody would light Tarik on fire please? Especially given that he’s sitting here claiming the mining will be better without them when it’s already been stated that the shift with a wher gets more ore out of the ground per shift than the the others because the wher itself is a fantastic digger.

Zist: We need someone to raise Kindan Natalon: So good of you to volunteer Zist: o.o

Nobody likes Tarik, good, send the man back to Crom, let them deal with his ass.

And more confirmation that Kindan has sisters, I really need this book to make up it’s mind

Nuella is upset she’ll have to avoid the Harper’s cottage with Kindan living in it

Zist: If I’m going to raise this child then damnit I’m making him a harper

We’re getting much character stuff but not much actually interesting

Chimney got clogged at the big boss’s house, Kindan managed to save the lot by coming by and noticing, the existence of Nuella is now known to him.

Kindan can keep a secret, he is taking  to harpering well

Mine’s having a lot of minor accidents

And now big boss’s wife’s baby is coming early, these fuckers just cannot catch a break

Nuella and her brother switching places back and forth so she can be involved in shit. Also she has some mind for healing

Zist had a daughter at one point- Carissa. Nice name

Also the baby is fine, a month early but fine. She doesn’t have a name yet, I will keep y’all updated

Chapter 5: “A baby’s cry, a mother’s sigh; Sweet things make a day go by”

Zist, having Kindan run around the camp telling adults what they need to do: It’ll be an interesting challenge for you Kindan, Telling the big boss that Zist offered to do his administrative work: He said it would be an interesting challenge for him

Oh shit Nuella is blind! Honestly, fucking slow clap for not making a big deal of it so far

The Traders have women of rank. I know this is a second Interval story but still, worth noting. Shit hasn’t gone completely to shit for the women yet

Nuella is having a crisis because she has no information including on things like ‘women don’t have to bake or be mothers, there are in fact options’. All of this is not helped by her mother stressing out about whether little Larissa is going to go blind like her sister did. Apparently shit went downhill when she was three and now her life is stress and isolation.

Okay, so Natalon’s mother was blind, and now his daughter is blind, and he’s trying to hide it from everybody for fear people are going to think there’s something wrong with him and will stop working with them and that nobody will want to marry his son. He’s given up on Nuella marrying. I want to smack him and adopt his children out to good homes.

Kindan, age 11, starting to realize girls can in fact be cute

Also they’re disguising her so she can play at the ‘yay there’s finally some new company for a few days’ Gather

Even Tarik’s fucking cronies don’t like him!

Nuella’s parents and brother are aware she’s there. No scene will be made.

Nuella getting to dance while Zist chides Kindan about not setting up his also 11-yo friends. “They’re too young to match, and you’re too young to be a matchmaker.”

Ooo, the mysterious missing 8th apprentice was a wherhandler and decided fuck that noise. Can’t blame him, I wouldn’t want ot deal with Tarik either

The assumption is he’d rather face his master’s wrath than work there, which peeps nothign that they’d all rather die than face their own masters’ wraths, and the noting that he may well have been worried about losing his wher to all this shit. Which makes sense with how hostile Tarik has made the place for them

Chapter 6: “Cromcoal, Cromcoal, burning bright; Warm the cold of winter’s night; Cromcoal Cromcoal, underground; Where the best of all coal’s found”

They are calling a dragon to take them to someone called Aleesa for, presumably, a wher egg. We are nearly halfway through this book, by the way, which is a little fucking late to finally be bringing in the wher egg but sure, fine.

Aleesa is the handle or a gold wher. Apparently the title for that is Master. So you get Weyrwomen and Whermasters. That’s pretty cool.

Kindan sees a dragon take note of the ‘we need a dragon’ flag and “Zist listened appreciatively and guided him to crafting a better tale, so that by the end of a sevenday, Kindan’s story took a full fifteen minutes to tell and left all eyes peering up to the sky, hoping for a glimpse of their own.”

Zist has Timed It before. Apparently he accidentally spooked a dragon hatchling when he was younger and they Impressed his friend and at some point he timed it to go back and help himself fix the damage the panicked bronze did. A bronze whose rider is now a Weyrleader, by the by. He’s figuring if it seems like they’ll miss their meeting to get the egg then hopefully they can Time It to get there on time.

Telgar Weyrleader D’gan shows up a week late, bitches about it not being an emergency, talks shit about everybody and everything, is lucky to leave with his life (I’d have killed him). Zist is, I assume, about to call Benden to actually get shit done.

“So, Kindan, what did you think of your first look at a dragon?” “Oh, they’re pretty enough, but you’d never fit one in a mine.”

Benden Weyrleader M’tal, being a proper fucking dragonrider who understands what his fucking duties are, is going to get shit done

People out here respecting whers and their importance, you love to see it.

Chapter 7: “Watch-wher, watch-wher in the mine; Help save life, yours and mine; Guide us in the darkest night; With your keen unfailing sight”

Gaminth reassuring Kindan as they travel Between.

“-to keep the hatchling warm until it’s second, tougher coat came in” Do, do whers shed their skin like birds molt baby fluff? Start with soft wherlet skin and then shed that for tough wher skin? I am amazed and also that’s adorable.

So, you’ve gotta convince the gold to let you pick one of her eggs to take with you. I presume if she says no and you press the matter she eats you.

Oh gods wherhandlers blood their children to their whers! Oh my gods that’s adorable! Make the babies pack! Gods how strong is that did Dask now how many of them were dead dear gods now I’m sad again-

Talking to the queen wher, being polite, sending her mental images, Kindan is a Good Boy

Wher eggs glow! Dimly but they glow! Also good boy Kindan, compliment those eggs!

Also they are half the size of dragon eggs and have wrinkles. (I assume wher eggs are more like snake eggs at first...)

“Eeny, meeny, tipsy, teeny, ah vu bumberosha, nineteen hundred and two, I pick you.” And he gets one with a ring around it in wrinkle.

Aleesa is a fucking Queen, sending Kindan, Zist, a Weyrleader, and the big boss away with a simple “You bore me.” She does make sure to compliment Kindan on a job well done and to reinforce that she expects her payment (which she’d have gotten either way, by the way, wher eggs are pricey and you’re paying for a shot at being allowed to have one)

On the topic of feeding wherlets:

“We’ve been experimenting, actually, on the best post-hatching meal. Watch-whers are not as insatiable as dragons, but they will gulp down meat and sometimes choke, as you know.” She pinned Kindan with a fiery glare, and he nodded as if he knew exactly what she meant. “D’you have oats?”

Kindan nodded, glancing over at Natalon to be sure he was also listening to Aleesa.

“Then arrange to get fresh blood from whoever butchers at the camp. Make porridge of the oats, using water, and add the blood as the oats thicken in the pot. I’d say a half-pail a day should be sufficient. If you keep the blood cool, a pailful should last over a day or two, no trouble. Most camps or Holds slaughter every other day. Feed it was often as it wants, and some of the liver and lungs that might go to waste otherwise. Don’t start meat hunks until three months, when it has enough back teeth to chew with. You can continue with porridge feeds in the morning until the hatchling starts to coats out.”

So the fuckers don’t start with all their teeth on top of everything.

Chapter 8: “Watch-wher, watch-wher in the egg; Grant to me the boon I beg”

This delight of a child is making porridge constantly so that it’ll be ready when the bab hatches. And then when it starts hatching he immediately darts for the porridge.

Bab eats like a fucking garbage disposal

She is also currently assumed to be green and apparently whers have notable enough bits to tell sex even if you can’t be sure of color

Kindan do not call the bab ugly, she is doing her best

“Did it give you a name?” “I didn’t ask.” “It is enough like a dragon to know it’s own name?” “I don’t know.”

“She’s not as big as I thought she would be.“

“Big enough to have the appetite of nine dragons,“ Kindan, almost proudly.

This girl is adorable

The Harper followed him out to the shed and greeted Zenor, who hadn’t moved from the spot in which Kindan had left him. The hatchling had been trying to crawl up his legs, her hungry bleek more insistent.

She has been blooded but not named. Kindan is moving in with her.

Nuella you’re a doll but if you can not assume that a baby can eat whatever an adult can eat, especially when Kindan is working off the knowledge of someone who actually, ya know, has experience with this shit? It’d be great.

The bab is now named Kisk and it’s pretty apparent she named her own damn self, for all that she didn’t use words.

Kindan, in a very 11-yo moment, wonders whether the WherMaster actually knows anything about raising whers since weaning his early worked out fine

Wherlet playing, I repeat, wherlet playing, far too adorable

Kisk is going to be a good little guard, already rooting out people who are where they shouldn’t be

Tarik’s wife likes whers! And is teaching her children to like whers! As all good people should!

Cristov, son of Tarik the Dick, is trying to make up his own mind about whers and-

Kisk darted her tongue out and licked Cristov’s outstretched hand before he could pull it bac,k. She made a sad, don’t-you-like-me noise at Cristov

Tarik: *talks shit like he’s got anything going for him* His Wife: *is gonna fucking smack him if he doesn’t start with some basic decency*

Kisk keeping Kindan up all damn night

Chapter 9: “Walk, baby, walk, come to me; Soon, baby, soon, you’ll walk away from me”

And now they’re trying to say Zenor and Nuella were born and raised in the camp despite saying earlier in the book that they’d been there less than a year two years ago.

Also at 3 months Kisk is 12 hands high at the shoulder and 40 from nose to tail. Which is about 4 ft by 13 ft, and still growing.

Kindan, hit with the sudden realization that oh, yeah, being a wherhandler is going to mean not being a harper

Nuella if anything the fact Kindan can’t see in the dark and doesn’t know where he’s going is all the more reason it’d be better training for Kisk to lead him than you, who knows this tunnel like the back of her hand, blind or no

Ooo, Tarik the Dick had a camp the failed, so now he’s all sour because his nephew’s doing better than him.

M’tal is here, Telgar is still bitches (what is it with Telgar being assholes?) and whers apparently don’t have the same problems with oiling and shit dragons do despite growing far faster which makes no damn sense but sure

Whers and dragons can chat amongst themselves, to the surprise of noone, or at least not me.

Nuella’s sweet on Zenor and honestly, go for it kiddo

Kisk is starting to learn.

Chapter 10: Hot air rises, cold air falls; These are thermodynamic laws

(Fuckers expect me to believe the Pernese couldn’t keep the word ‘year’ but ‘thermodynamic’ survived)

Nuella theorizing that whers see heat because she can feel it. I want to say it’s because she’s twelve and, as kids do, thinks she knows everything, but the more I read the more I’m fairly sure it’s just that the McCaffrey’s want her to be Amazing and The Best (which, ugh) and so are just, doing this. It doesn’t work.

Dragonriders here looking for a potential goldrider (very clearly Nuella from the conversation) and lamenting that based on the dragon’s description she might be blind and therefor ‘unable to Impress’ and just- Shit that makes you wanna throw things

Ya know they did so good before they revealed Nuella is blind. She was just another kid then, it was nice, but now... I love her but my hackles are raising

Also can I just say that whers seeing heat is the stupidest thing I’ve heard yet, given everything we know about their anatomy leads to them seeing in the darkness like everything else with massive fucking eyes and a nocturnal disposition.

Operation: Teach Whers to Bespeak Dragons During Emergencies is a go

Nuella claiming that whers can’t be taught to Between because nobody can see heat like they (apparently) can and we’re to take this as gospel despite the like, second thing Dask ever did on-page being to Between on his lonesome. Did these people not have editors? It didn’t seem so bad at first but as time goes on and we get more shit that contradicts other shit (we got contradicting information within pages of each other for fuck’s sake) I am slowly losing my mind

Tarik continues to be a dick and refuses to shore up his tunnels correctly. And he wonders why he lost his fucking camp.

Kindan saw through Kisk’s eyes during hide-and-seek

Chapter 11: “Watch-wher, watch-wher, guard us all; With your dragon-summoning call”

Turns out wherhandlers don’t take well to some dragonrider coming by and trying to teach them about their whers.

Nuella is being offered the chance to go teach whers to chat with dragons.

Everyone is supportive even while she has a quick little existential breakdown that’s probably been building for a while

We skip forward to Nuella going via dragon to Lemos to start her work. Dragons like her and she takes well to Between

Wherhandlers really can’t do well learning from dragonriders because their critters are so different

Nuella is good at what she does.

There’s far too much of old men going ‘*gasp* this child suddenly reminds me of [blank] they are amazing’ though

Whers and their handlers are learning

Turns out, surprise surprise, whers are awesome

Chapter 12: “Harper, harper, sing me a song; Give me a tune that lasts all day long”

Feels like it’s trying too hard...

Tarik the Dick has caused a cave-in and now is refusing to do anything about it because he is, well, see above

There is a now a team of rescuers, mostly kids, out to save the day via secret passage and wher

Nuella: Lolanth, I need your rider to send word to the MasterMiner and also get the pumps pulling air out the mines Lolanth: I have told my rider, and called Gaminth, he and his are coming, and I’ve called Ista, they’re coming, and I’ve told the miners-

Lolanth is a Good Dragon who apparently does not go halfsies

Lolanth got everyone and their grandmother to this camp within thirty seconds

On the one hand, blind characters getting to be awesome, one the other, this is really leaning towards Magically Disabled. Nobody can hear things like Nuella can, nobody can work with whers like Nuella can, nobody is as smart as Nuella is, she’s 12 and better than the majority of the adults around her, just, if they could fucking chill for five minutes.

Also people are alive on the other side of the cave-in

Finally Kindan remembers that Dask could Between, and I promise you it’s going to turn out that he was a miracle and only Nuella (who has no idea what’s on the other side of the cave-in) can show Kisk where she needs to go

Wow, it’s like I’m magic

Chapter 13: “Watch-wher, watch-wher, do you know; All the places you can go?”

I’m glad everybody who survived the cave-in is saved but we just got a fucking paragraph “But it is I who have been blind” speech from Nuella’s father and just. Kill me, please.

And Kisk has decided to swap handlers and be Nuelsk now.

And Kindan is going off to become a Harper.

~~

Okay, not the worst book I’ve read. There were places that needed editing, there was a lot of shit that contradicted each other (Kindan’s everchanging number of siblings just being one example), it had plenty of the McCaffrey’s trademark Totally Accurate Science, and the longer I spent reading it the more it felt like one of those ‘see, disabled people can also do things and be capable’ stories complete with a fucking “But it is I who have been blind” (literal quote, kill me now). And this shit is from 2003. On the plus side though, there’s plenty of quality wher content and the kids are fun when the writers aren’t on their little Not A Soapbox.

Overall, a 6/10, if someone wrote an anosmiac character this way I’d want their head on a stick no matter how badass they were.

[autumnblogs]

Day 14: The Ultimate Reward

https://homestuck.com/story/2404

Movies are one of the main vectors that culture uses to transmit itself in the modern day, and if it sounds like I’m describing this form of cultural reproduction like a virus, you’re not wrong. The concept of the viral video has been around for about 15 years, if memory serves, and Homestuck’s self-referential format closely recalls the snowclone and advice animal type memes of the late thousands. Meme itself is a word coined by Richard Dawkins to describe the basic unit of cultural reproduction and transmission. While the lines related to memes from Metal Gear Solid have become memes themselves,

John and Karkat’s lives are both shaped by memes, transmitted to them through movies. John’s ideas about romance and family are shaped by his movies, Karkat and his ideas about romance and family are shaped by his movies.

https://homestuck.com/story/2406

The narration insists that Feferi and Eridan are made for each other, but their romance almost immediately disintegrates. The narrative is training us to be skeptical of the Troll’s preoccupation with Romantic Destiny. The idea that you have one soulmate, a person you were just destined for who it’ll work out with, is bogus.

https://homestuck.com/story/2435

Something about this sequence has inspired me to talk about Society with a capital S. Both Hobbes’ Leviathan  and Ginsberg’s Howl talk about Society with a capital S - the indistinct entity, the system which arises seemingly unbidden from the gestalt of myriad human interactions, parables about social systems.

Leviathan is a founding myth for the social contract and liberalism in general. As one of the petite bourgeoisie who benefits from Liberalism, it is of course in Hobbes’ interest to defend its existence and provide justification for the material conditions he benefits from, but Howl is considerably less charitable. Referring to the same entity as Moloch, Ginsberg describes it as an incommensurable monster, consuming the lives of the men and women who make it up to further its own agenda.

Authoritarians have always used the threat of cultural extinction in order to justify unjust material conditions and social hierarchies. Fail to fall in line, and Western Civilization is doomed. Glub Glub (who I refuse to call anything else, Feferi’s Lusus, you know who I mean) is the physical manifestation of this threat, an unbearable burden foisted upon troll society by their overlord, Lord English, to force them to participate in a system that guarantees their inability to produce ethical behavior. Their choice has always been a choice between murder and extinction.

https://homestuck.com/story/2439

Eridan is fascinating to me. I don’t know if he predicted the Incel movement, or was merely an agglomeration of school shooter, neo-fascist stereotypes, but boy is he absolutely spot-on - the fascination with military history, the emotional theatrics, the possessive and entitled attitude toward the women in his life.

https://homestuck.com/story/2441

Feferi’s a sweet girl, but she’s still one of the people who benefits from Alternian Society. The problem has never been that the Condesce is a brutal evil woman, the problem is the way that Alternian Society is structured in the first place. I’ll have more to say about this whenever we get to Openbound, since Feferi’s rule is discussed more there, and I’ll definitely have more to say about it when I eventually write the companion piece that I intend to about Hierarchy, Patriarchy, and so on and so forth. That one might be a long time coming though, because a lot of Homestuck is devoted to examining it, and I think it might end up being my longest essay. It’s the theme I think is the most directly applicable to real life, hence the import.

Feferi’s caretaking attitude and controlling predilections are also juxtaposed with Jade’s in the same way that Kanaya’s maternal instinct and green thumb are juxtaposed with Jade’s. Could it be that as the Witch of Space, Jade Harley is the ultimate mom?

https://homestuck.com/story/2448

Man, as long as I’m comparing Eridan to neo-fascists and Feferi to the political establishment, this relationship between the two of them - the way that Feferi views her enabling of Eridan as actually curtailing his worst excesses -  really smacks of the kind of unity and compromise rhetoric that liberals always seem to spout in order to justify their decision to adopt moderate right-wing policy instead of actual left-wing policy.

I’m probably reaching here, but the thought popped into my head unbidden, and I’m trying to keep this liveblog as stream of consciousness as possible.

https://homestuck.com/story/2458

People think about us way less than we think about ourselves.

https://homestuck.com/story/2467

Just as I’m not here to defend Eridan (he’s a piece of shit who knows what he did), I’m not here to attack Feferi, or to excuse her. Characters in Homestuck are frequently both abusers and victims.

Feferi’s relationship with Eridan is complicated. For starters, she isn’t really curtailing the worst of his excesses, not the way that she thinks he is. Feferi has authority, one way or the other, and by being emotionally available to Eridan, she has enabled him more than she has prevented him from doing wrong. Cutting him out of her life earlier could have sent a clear message to Eridan that his genocidal ideation is not okay, but instead, she has afforded the luxury of her presence.

The aforementioned preoccupation with Romantic Destiny probably made it so much easier for her to wait, too. As the Heiress, Feferi enjoys all the benefits of being in troll society while having to put up with almost none of the downsides. The suffering of other people - the extra pointless emotional turmoil she puts Eridan through by stringing him along, the suffering of the trolls whose lusii she has employed him to murder - their suffering is all theoretical to her. It’s not something she’s ever had to encounter herself (something she shares in common with Jane - if I remember correctly, Andrew’s commentary suggests that he picked up some of the ideas he was originally exploring with Feferi to explore with Jane).

(Some of these ideas are from a conversation with @bladekindeyewear with whom I was having a conversation on Discord while I was writing this).

https://homestuck.com/story/2475

Instead of indulging Eridan’s emotional theatrics (he continues to make other people’s suffering about himself, via his pretension of nobility) I want to call attention to the fact that, as a chemical coping mechanism, Homestuck compares Trolls’ use of Soda to humans’ use of alcohol.

I don’t know if sugary beverages have a similarly potent physiological effect on trolls as alcohol has on humans, and it doesn’t matter if it does - the parallel is being drawn nevertheless. I’m only making this point, because later on it will become important: Terezi and Rose’s respective addictions (Rose’s alcoholism and Terezi’s... sodaholism?) directly mirror each other.

https://homestuck.com/story/2516

The fact that Vriska’s narration here describes these sidequests as pointless is, I think, another clue into Vriska’s overall character. By all accounts, she and Tavros actually seem to be having a blast together. She’s not going for the gold, she’s not skipping right to the end, the two of them are just screwing around in her magical land, going on adventures. Okay, she is literally going for the gold in the sense of treasure hunting, but in a more figurative sense, the Vriska we’re more familiar with would probably be a taskmaster, using the scourge of her overbearing personality to drive the team forward to victory over the main final boss. Instead, she’s most in her element here when she’s not doing anything remotely important at all, just hanging out with someone she likes(hates? Troll friendships are complicated.)

Abusive relationships are rarely as obvious or simple as one person harassing and berating the other all the time. Tavros is clearly having a blast here too, and throughout this whole sequence.

https://homestuck.com/story/2521

The problem is that there are two Vriskas (at least), the Vriska who lives inside of her, who she’s only comfortable bringing out around people who have no expectations for her, and the Vriska that Scratch, and Spidermom, and Sn0wman are egging her on to be, the Ideal Troll who cuts through the bullshit, cuts to the chase, and becomes the most important person in the universe. Later on, they will be literally bifurcated by John’s retcon shenanigans.

Homestuck uses the language of alternate selves and ultimate selves to discuss a question that is applicable to real life as well. “Who is the definitive version of a character for whom different choices and versions of themselves are possible?” And when applied to real life, the question becomes something more like, “Could I have chosen to do something else instead of the thing that I did? Are my intentions important, or only my actions?” I don’t think it answers clearly, but just getting us to think about it might be sufficient.

https://homestuck.com/story/2531

The Black Queen is just one of the many malign influences in Terezi and Vriska’s lives, and while she’s not literally an abusive parent to both of them, by egging them on to indulge their worst excesses (Egging Terezi on to persecute people pre-emptively or overzealously, egging Vriska on to take away other people’s agencies), it’s safe to say that her voice is just one of many doing the same thing for the two of them.

https://homestuck.com/story/2543

Oh man. The memoes are some of my favorite conversations in all of Homestuck. They’re funny, but with the exception of one or two of them, I’m not sure how much useful info we’ll get out of them.

https://homestuck.com/story/2567

:)

https://homestuck.com/story/2575

Karkat and Terezi may not have literally had sex, but whatever their secret encounter was is effectively symbolic of a consummation of their relationship. She knows what color Karkat’s blood is. They have been in a pail together.

The two of them can hardly be more intimate with each other.

Too bad it doesn’t work out.

But then, it’s probably for the best - the fact that it doesn’t work out for the two of them is the retrospect we need to be able to say it was never going to work out for the two of them.

https://homestuck.com/story/2576

Something different does it for everyone.

https://homestuck.com/story/2578

What does it for Vriska is having the shit beaten out of her by Aradia.

What is Vriska’s big takeaway from this beatdown?

Maybe if we continue to read Aradia as being Vriska’s doppelganger, being savagely beaten by one of her own victims, and one who is so like her in terms of her feelings of helplessness, her feelings of being at the whim of a cosmos that is out to get her, Vriska realizes that the thing she lashes out to attack in other people - the weakness loathed by troll society - is what she hates and fears the most in herself.

https://homestuck.com/story/2587

Aradia is starting to lose her tolerance for scenarios that involve being manipulated by those very same actors that are making her feel helpless.

https://homestuck.com/story/2593

Aradia interprets Sburb as being a challenge to come between any prospective gods and the ultimate reward. Perhaps that is the case. Assigning intent to Sburb to me seems possibly flawed, since it is, after all, only the reproductive organ of a universe. But perhaps it does have some intentions of its own. Are those intentions uniquely Sburb’s? Perhaps specifically Skaia’s. Maybe they are even, more generally, the intentions of Paradox Space itself. But Sburb itself seems more ambivalent to its players than anything. The vast majority of sessions, it seems, kill their players outright, or at least produce null sessions that never give rise to universal reproduction.

https://homestuck.com/story/2625

And that is where we shall conclude for this evening.

Cam signing off, Alive and Not Alone.