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ceilidho · 5 months

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prompt: simon notices you in the stands (welder/amateur rugby player au). (nsfw, 1.9k)

She’s in the stands again, and he doesn’t know who for.

The same bird as the time before, and the week before that. Always a few minutes into the match, like she snuck in through the backdoor. She always leaves in a hurry, up and out of her seat with her jacket already tugged on, her strides quick on her way out the main doors.

In the years since joining this amateur league, Simon’s never been tempted to talk to any of the people in the stands. For the most part, they’re there for one of the other players anyway. Wives, girlfriends, sisters—the odd cousin or fuck buddy, those girls dipping in and out, replaced by newer, sparklier versions of each other, the older ones licked clean.

His focus narrows when he steps onto the field anyway, shrinks like horse blinders sunk down over his skull. Hardly a reason for him to spare more than a glance towards the stands.

Rugby’s not a sport for spectators. At least, not such a low level league. Barely amateur—just some of the locals with a bit of built up stress and aggression to work off. It’s why he’s here after all. Simon spends the hours of his day hunched over sheets of metal and carbon steel, sweating into the metal mask pulled down over his face and staring without blinking into the heart of the flame just inches from his face.

His nerves are a closed fist in his chest and it grows and grows until he steps out onto the field of the local rec centre and hears the timer overhead start to count down and feels someone’s chest cave in when he drives his shoulder into their solar plexus, hears the breath whoosh out of them, their next breath in thin and febrile.

It sets his head right. Violence with no consequences. At the end of the game, he looks the man he just bruised and bloodied in the eye and shakes his hand. Puts the world to rights.

And he needs nothing more than that. His bills are paid, bloodthirst sated, thirst quenched when the team hits up a pub after the match, after which he slinks off into the night to head home with his hood drawn over his head, the size of him rarely inviting more violence. Occasionally it happens that someone with the bad luck of choosing him to mug wants to prove that they have the bigger cock, but that never ends well. Not for them at least.

Simon would fight for a living if welding paid him less. As it is, he satiates that beast in him on the field or the occasional back alley, and it keeps him in check.

But now there’s a bird in the stands drawing his eye and distracting him from the match. It rubs him the wrong way. The blood pumps through his veins more viciously, and the pretty thing in the stands watches the game completely unaware, a serene smile on her face. His gaze keeps being pulled towards where she and a couple clusters of fans sit and nurse paper cups of tea.

She cups both hands around her tea and he wonders absently whether she’d have to hold his cock the same way.

It’s Gaz who calls him out on it first, panting hard after the first period and frowning at the scoreboard. “Not to be a dick, but that was bollocks, Simon. Never seen you miss a pass like that.”

Few people could get away with speaking to him like that, but Gaz is right. He’s been playing like shit, too preoccupied by the bird watching him with wide, rapt eyes.

He doesn’t know how to apologise though, so he doesn’t. “Graves is a useless twat. Can’t throw for shit.”

Gaz rolls his eyes. “Not saying he isn’t, but you’re distracted. Where’s your head at?”

“Stay out of it, Garrick,” he says, not even bothering to meet his gaze, the warning clear in his voice.

“Sorry for caring,” Gaz shouts after him as Simon jogs away.

He asks around at first, trying to find out if she’s someone’s relative or girl, but all the guys just shrug, no answers. If she’s someone’s, they aren’t staking a claim on her. It’s good news for him. Bad news for anyone else taking an interest in the girl that comes to their every match to cheer them on.

His urges sit deeper than the abyssal plain.

She’d probably turn tail and run if she knew the hunger festering in his belly. She sits sweet and innocent in the stands cheering him on and all Simon can think about is pushing her knees up to her ears and feeding his fat cock into her pussy. Shoving his tongue into her cunt, licking her from hole to hole. Sucking each puffy lip into his mouth until her moans go garbled, eyes unfocused.

No, Simon thinks when she jumps to her feet enthusiastically at the end of the match, she probably wouldn’t like that. Women rarely do. Objectifying them and all those other terms that Gaz likes to wax on about, Johnny nodding along like he isn’t the same kind of mutt as Simon.

Even during the day, she troubles his thoughts. Troublemaker. He thinks of her when he cleans and buffs in between passes, mind not lulled into the rhythmic emptiness of usual. Even the sound of steel sizzling in his ears doesn’t clear her from his thoughts. Instead all he can think of is her walking into the shop in a little skirt and top, and dragging her to the back where he’d bend her over the closest desk and pull her panties to the side before sinking in to the hilt, mask still on.

He’s never gotten his cock wet on the job—never been tempted to. For her though, he’d make an exception.

By the next match, Simon’s made up his mind. When he sees her sneak in after the match has already started, he feels his blood pump harder, his tackles extra rough. His opponents walk away wincing and cursing him under their breath, but it only makes him preen when he glances over to find her watching him, hardly able to pull her eyes away. Price would call it peacocking. He wouldn’t be wrong.

He approaches her himself at the end of the match before she’s had time to pack up and leave, leaning over the railing separating the field from the stands, covered in sweat and grass stains and bleeding from his right eyebrow.

She stares up at him wide eyed, looking a little lost for words. “Hi?”

“Got somewhere to be?” he asks, blunt. He’s never had it in him for pleasantries. Why waste time when he can see even now the way her eyes rove over his chest appreciatively?

“…No,” she finally answers, shaking her head. “Just home for supper.”

“Look like you could use a good fuck. Come round back with me?”

The blatant proposition makes her eyes widen, but Simon doesn’t see the problem. Figures if she doesn’t have a man, there’s no issue with him trying out for the part. He waits her out though, vaguely admiring the pert shape of her mouth, lips round with shock.

Finally they come back together and she chews on her lower lip nervously, caught off-guard but considering it. He doesn’t hold it against her. His bird’s pretty enough, but he doubts she ever puts herself in the position to be asked. He sees the yes in her eyes before she says it.

Still, he enjoys the way she stutters it out softly, eyes downcast. Simon doesn’t bother with his goodbyes to the guys still on the field before ushering her out of the arena and down the hall to the locker rooms with a hand on her back. He drags her into the first empty supply closet he finds, locking the door behind them. She breathes a bit heavily, almost stumbling over her feet, and that’s the eagerness he’s been looking for. Proof his bird’s just as hungry as him.

She definitely is, Simon thinks, smug when he hoists her up and her legs wrap around his waist without a second thought, her eyes already glazed over. Like she’s been waiting for this for weeks, cunt already sopping wet when he nudges her panties to the side with his knuckles and buries his cock into her. She grips him like a vice, slack jawed and whimpering into the stretch. He likes that. He likes it more when she digs her nails deep into his back, leaving her mark behind.

“C’mon, don’t get shy on me,” Simon huffs into her neck when she tries to grab his hair instead, what little of it she can. He stares with eyes half-lidded at the way her tits bounce with each thrust. “I like it rough.”

She clenches up at that, dripping wet. Almost a shame that he couldn’t get his mouth on her first. He’ll have to follow her back home like the mongrel he is, mess her pretty bedsheets up and make her scream until she can’t even face the neighbours the next day.

He doesn’t need her to tell him to know that she’s a good girl, doesn’t do this ever. Only for him. He can tell by how tight of a screw she is, practically purring in his arms; it’s a fight to bully his cock into her. It’s nice when she stutters it out though, strokes his ego the right way.

“D-didn’t think you’d notice me,” she says, all shy even with her legs spread.

“Hard not to, pet,” Simon teases, endeared by her soft edges. His slot right in, if not a bit jaggedly. “Been panting after it for a while, haven’t ya?”

“I just wanted to get out of the flat for a bit,” she whispers.

That shifts his perception of her a bit. Infinitesimally so, but still. He didn’t expect the bird to have a lonely flame in her heart.

“Well, I noticed,” he grunts, and then bends to suck at the salty skin at the crook of her neck before pumping a load into her.

She’s a real good girl. Comes nice on his cock and muffles her whine by biting into his shoulder. He can’t wait until he’s covered in her bites, until his nipples hurt from making her chew on them and his neck is littered with hickeys like a schoolboy.

Taking her home is easy enough after that. She lets him drive them both back to her place, handing him the keys with a little yawn when he tucks her into the passenger seat of her own car all limp and pliant.

And he’s right, of course. He makes a right mess of her bed come morning.

When he leaves after a morning fuck in the shower and breakfast, the cold sinks into his stomach like a lead weight. The fist in his chest is clenched as ever; Simon hadn’t noticed it loosen in the bird’s presence, but he feels it now drawn tight again. Maybe he thought fucking her would finally shake her from his head, but instead it’s made it worse somehow. The lonely flame in his own chest flickers.

He stands in the middle of the sidewalk and thinks it over while angry nine-to-fivers snap at him before really taking him in and scurrying along. Then he turns back around, heading back the way he came.

The next time Simon sees her in the stands, he feels his smile like a phantom limb. He doesn’t have to ask to know she’s there for him.

#ceil writing #cod mw2 #cod x reader #ghost x reader #ghost/reader #cod simon riley #ghost cod #simon ghost riley #simon ghost x you #simon ghost x reader

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gay-otlc · 2 months

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I'm generally not a fan of quantifying oppression or looking at it as a scoreboard, but I frequently hear the claim that if you read the data, it will show that trans women are indisputably the most oppressed of all trans people, and isn't comparable to the level of oppression trans men face. And I looked at some data, from the UK's National LGBT Survey (I was referring to it for some data on transheterosexuality so I had it on hand).

The survey included 3,740 trans women and 3,170 trans men.

Being LGBT in the UK:

Average comfort level being LGBT on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being the most satisfied: 3.10 for trans women, 3.15 for trans men

Average life satisfaction on a scale of 1-10, 10 being the most satisfied: 5.07 for trans men, 5.52 for trans women

The data from this survey indicates that similar proportions of trans men and trans women tended to struggle in their overall experiences living as a trans person.

Openness about gender identity

Entirely closeted with friends: 7.4% of trans women, 2.8% of trans men

Entirely closeted with family members that participant lived with: 20.1% of trans women, 14.5% of trans men)

Entirely closeted with family members that participant did not live with: 25.3% of trans women, 22.0% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity for fear of a negative reaction: 58.9% of trans women, 56.2% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in public premises or buildings: 67.6% of trans women, 62.4% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity on streets or outdoor public places: 68.1% of trans women, 61.8% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity on public transport: 68.7% of trans women, 58.7% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in neighborhood: 68.5% of trans women, 56.9% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in workplace: 60.6% of trans women, 53.0% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in cafes, restaurants, pubs, or clubs: 61.8% of trans women, 57.5% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in the park: 54.4% of trans women, 46.2% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in other environments: 9.0% of trans women, 8.9% of trans men

Avoiding being open about gender identity in athletic environments: 63.1% of trans men, 60.2% of trans women

Avoiding being open about gender identity in schools: 45.6% of trans men, 35.1% of trans women

Avoiding being open about gender identity at home: 38.9% of trans men, 32.4% of trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans women than trans men tended to struggle with being open about their gender identity.

Transphobia from people the participant lived with

Verbal harassment: 34.0% of trans men, 22.2% of trans women

Outing: 38.5% of trans men, 23.5% of trans women

Threats of violence: 7.0% of trans men, 6.1% of trans women

Coercive/controlling behavior: 25.0% of trans men, 18.2% of trans women

Physical violence: 6.1% of trans men, 4.2% of trans women

Sexual violence: 2.2% of trans men, 2.1% of trans women

Other transphobic incidents: 29.4% of trans men, 18.3% of trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans men than trans women tended to struggle with facing transphobia from people they lived with.

Transphobia from people the participant did not live with

Outing: 29.4% of trans men, 24.6% of trans women

Verbal harassment: 42.2% of trans women, 36.0% of trans men

Threats of violence: 13.7% of trans women, 10.5% of trans men

Physical violence: 7.2% of trans women, 5.6% of trans men

Sexual violence: 6.1% of trans women, 3.9% of trans men

Other transphobic incidents: 27.6% of trans women, 25.8% of trans men

Private sexual images shared without consent: 18.5% of trans women, 13.3% of trans men

Had conversion therapy: 5.0% of trans women, 4.1% of trans men

Offered conversion therapy: 9.3% of trans men, 7.6% of trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans women than trans men tended to struggle with facing transphobia from people they did not live with.

Experiences in school/educational institutions

Entirely closeted at school: 16.6% of trans women, 9.3% of trans men

Entirely negative reactions at school: 3.6% of trans women, 2.1% of trans men

Entirely positive reactions at school: 28.9% of trans men, 34.7% of trans women

Outing at school: 77.9% of trans men, 62.9% of trans women

Verbal harassment at school: 73.4% of trans women, 70.0% of trans men

Exclusion from activities at school: 31.7% of trans women, 24.3% of trans men

Threats of violence at school: 25.0% of trans women, 19.8% of trans men

Physical violence at school: 15.1% of trans women, 9.6% of trans men

Sexual violence at school: 12.4% of trans women, 5.0% of trans men

Other transphobic incidents at school: 50.0% of trans men, 47.3% of trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans women than trans men tended to struggle with being trans in schools/educational institutions.

Workplace experiences

Had a paid job: 56.9% of trans men, 65.3% of trans women

Entirely closeted with senior colleagues: 33.4% of trans men, 31.5% of trans women

Entirely closeted with colleagues at same/lower level: 30.6% of trans men, 26.6% of trans women

Entirely positive reactions in workplace: 34.7% of trans women, 36.3% of trans men

Entirely negative reactions in workplace: 5.1% of trans women, 3.9% of trans men

Outing at work: 59.9% of trans men, 55.5% of trans women

Verbal harassment at work: 49.6% of trans women, 45.6% of trans men

Exclusion from activities at work: 32.7% of trans women, 21.8% of trans men

Threats of violence at work: 9.6% of trans women, 7.7% of trans men

Physical violence at work: 5.5% of trans women, 3.2% of trans men

Sexual violence at work: 7.0% of trans women, 4.0% of trans men

Other transphobic incidents at work: 54.2% of trans men, 53.3% of trans women

The data from this survey indicates that similar proportions of trans women and trans men tended to struggle with being trans in the workplace, with slightly more trans women struggling.

Public healthcare experiences

Needs ignored: 32.3% of trans men, 24.0% of trans women

Avoided treatment for fear of discrimination: 24.3% of trans men, 17.4% of trans women

Inappropriate questions/curiosity from healthcare workers: 29.0% of trans men, 18.9% of trans women

Discrimination from healthcare staff: 14.2% of trans men, 12.6% of trans women

Inappropriate referral to specialist services: 13.8% of trans men, 10.3% of trans women

Unwanted pressure for medical testing: 10.6% of trans men, 8.6% of trans women

Had to change GP: 10.9% of trans men, 9.7% of trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans men than trans women tended to struggle with public healthcare.

Mental healthcare experiences

Average ease accessing mental health services, on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being very easy: 2.49 for trans men, 2.55 for trans women

Unsuccessful accessing mental health services: 28.6% of trans women, 27.7% of trans men

Anxious/embarrassed about accessing mental health services: 40.1% of trans men, 29.1% of trans women

Unsupportive mental health practitioner: 17.0% of trans men, 16.9% of trans women

Average mental health service ratings, on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being completely positive: 3.22 for trans men, 3.40 for trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans men than trans women tended to struggle with mental healthcare.

Sexual healthcare experiences

Average ease accessing sexual health services, on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being very easy: 3.72 for trans men, 3.75 for trans women

Unsuccessful accessing sexual health services: 14.6% of trans women, 12.3% of trans men

Anxious/embarrassed about sexual health services: 57.3% of trans men, 31.8% of trans women

Unsupportive sexual health practitioner: 15.1% of trans men, 11.9% of trans women

Rating of sexual health services, on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being completely positive: 4.05 for trans men, 4.10 for trans women

The data from this survey indicates that more trans men than trans women tended to struggle with sexual healthcare.

TLDR: According to the data from this survey, the areas in which trans women tended to face more struggles than trans men were in openness about gender identity, transphobia from people they don't live with, and being trans in educational institutions. The areas in which trans men tended to face more struggles than trans women were in transphobia from people they did live with, public healthcare services, mental healthcare services, and sexual healthcare services. Trans men and trans women struggled similarly with being trans in the workplace, and with their overall experience being trans in the UK, with trans women facing slightly more struggles in the workplace.

Obviously, this is only one survey, and doesn't represent all trans people as it was conducted only in the UK. It's possible that another survey might show trans women struggling more in healthcare, or trans men struggling more in schools.

But I would say this is strong evidence that trans women are not necessarily the most oppressed of all trans people by far in all areas of life. Trans men and trans women both face severe oppression, in some similar and some unique ways, and it helps no one to minimize the suffering of either.

Reading Comprehension Questions:

Did OP say that trans men are more oppressed than trans women? (Hint: No)

Did OP say that trans women oppress trans men? (Hint: Also no)

Did OP say that transmisogyny isn't a real issue, or that trans women shouldn't be allowed to talk about transmisogyny? (Hint: No again)

Did OP say that trans men's oppression is more important than trans women's and deserves to be talked about more? (Hint: Still no)

Did OP say that any issues are exclusive to trans men or trans women and that we have no overlap in our struggles? (Hint: You guessed it- no!)

#transmisogyny #anti-transmasculinity #trans #did i hyperfixate on this for like three hours? you can't prove anything fuck you #also apologies for not including nonbinary data in here! the discourse tends to focus on trans men vs women so that's what i addressed #but if i ever get the energy i will def do a follow up on how the stats look for nonbinary respondents

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