#literally. as somebody who dont know shit about bleach

[lxclerc]

𝐬𝐨 𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 ─ 𝐦𝐯𝟏

summary: where max verstappen is the subject of a love song from a singer who never writes love songs pairing: max verstappen x american singer!reader faceclaim: no one specifically but based off olivia rodrigo

note: me? writing max verstappen? smau fluff? on main? everyone look away.

dailyynupdates

liked by user33, user4, user16 and others

dailyynupdates yn was seen around monte carlo the past few days, taking pictures with fans and allegedly cozying up with three time world champion max verstappen

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user12 what is going on in the house of commons because this was the last thing i expected

user39 this is quite literally the most random pairing i've ever stumbled across

user91 how do they even know each other 😭 user63 right like...where did this even come from? how did it start? literally how did they meet? they could not be farthest apart in the sphere of famous people

user19 now who the hell is max verstappen and why is he with my wife?

user49 oh girl you have a lot to catch up on the max lore user71 max is a formula one driver user56 saying max is a formula 1 driver like he currently isn't dominating the sport to the point where people hates him saying he's making it boring since he keeps winning because he's just that fucking good that literally no other driver can keep up is kinda wild user10 oh so our girl's new man is good at his job user52 "good at his job might just be the biggest understatement of the century when it comes to max. man's a fucking beast at his job

user48 i dont have to see her with her ratty ex anymore omfg war is over

user93 dare i say...they're adorable

user82 yn being in an age appropriate, healthy relationship? i never thought the day would come

user74 we won for real 🥹🫶

dailyynupdates

liked by user23, user31, user69 and others

dailyynupdates max and yn in a video posted by yn's friend 😭

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user93 oh my god look at them 😭

user81 they look so in love i want to cry

user65 "maximillian, do i look pretty like this?" "you always look pretty" i couldn't quite catch what he said at the end but 😭😭😭

user85 dutch here and i believe he said "laiverd" which means darling user75 this means so much to me user65 you just made my entire week

user45 seeing her in love after all the shit men is healing a part of me i didnt know was broken

user53 max fixing her hood then kissing her cheek what if you just stabbed me

user31 every time i see these, i get the urge to take a shot of bleach 😀

sincerelyyn ✓

liked by conangrey, maxverstappen1, taylorswift and others

sincerelyyn can't have a conversation if it's not all about you

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yourfriend as the other person of those conversations, he's fine i guess 😒

sincerelyyn you know i love youuuuu

taylorswift love seeing you happy ❤️

sincerelyyn ❤️❤️ user73 mother is all of us user63 you know it's real when it's taylor swift approved

conangrey i hate happy couples i hope you both trip 🫶

sincerelyyn die 🫶

user92 their friendship is everything to me

user15 not girlie trying to soft launch like we all don't know who it is 😭

user43 THEYRE SO ‼️🥵🥰⚠️

user65 you're so right

user24 i'm so happy finally seeing our girl happy 😭

user84 "someday i'll be everything to somebody else" YES YOU ARE BABYGIRL 😭

maxverstappen1

liked by sincerelyyn, charles_leclerc, landonorris and others

maxverstappen1 my american girl 🩷

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charles_leclerc i still can't believe this is happening

maxverstappen1 for someone who don't even follow me, you sure are early to my posts 😒 user91 max gagged him with that im afraid

landonorris please please max talk to her about getting me tickets 😭

user85 lando is just like us fr struggling to get guts tour tickets maxverstappen1 no ❤️ landonorris 😔 sincerelyyn @landonorris let me get you in contact with my team 🤍 maxverstappen1 baby noooo sincerelyyn be nice, max landonorris HELL YEAH THANKS YN user42 this is the crossover i never thought i needed

user66 max posting non racing content and being all soft in the comments for yn in what world am i in

user52 fr i feel like im in an alternate universe 😭

sincerelyyn love youuuu

maxverstappen1 love you more

sincelyyn i never knew love could be so golden till i met you <3

maxverstappen1 mijn hele hart is van jou, schat (you own my entire heart, darling) user42 they mean so very much to me 😭

danielricciardo god the two of you make me nauseous

maxverstappen1 hating because you ain't us danielricciardo im not liking that attitude, kid 😒 user71 daniel is so us

sincerelyyn

liked by maxverstappen1, taylorswift, yourfriend and others

sincerelyyn so american will be out on all platforms at midnight. a letter to the man i love, the only way i know how ❤️

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maxverstappen1 i adore you with everything in my being ❤️

sincerelyyn ik hou van je (i love you)

i hope you guys liked this as much as i loved writing it 🫶

[golddplatedd]

Answer 21 questions and tag 21 mutuals you would like to get to know better!

Tagged by @lokilesbian thank u sam ily

Nicknames: sjjsk i dont really have nicknames..i dont have a nickname-able name i suppose 

Zodiac sign: leo baby!!!! (the best sign)

Height: like 5’1 maybe 5′2 on a good day with the right shoes

Hogwarts house: hufflepuff babey!

Last thing i googled: literally just the phrase “batman”

Favourite musicians: o shit..... fall out boy, mitski, the cure, brockhampton, my chemical romance are the main ones but some honorable mentions are: coin, depeche mode, walk the moon, panic at the disco (except that last trainwreck of an album), joy division, ella fitzgerald

Song stuck in your head: if you wanna by the vaccines

Following: 773 (wow thats a lot)

Followers: 577 on this blog teehee

do you get asks: not usually

amount of sleep: i usually get like....8 hours ish? i need to sleep enough or i will die

lucky number: 13 probably

what youre wearing: a black longsleeve shirt under a plaid overall jumpsuit thing and doc martens

dream job: i dont have a dream job but i think being a neurologist would be cool

dream trip: im going on my dream trip this summer :’))) I’m going to paris, london, and then getting dropped off in scotland to study animal cognition for 5 weeks!!! ahhhhhh!!!

instrument: i play oboe and saxophone and i used to play flute many moons ago and im attempting to teach myself ukulele but string instruments are not my forte ( its a music joke)

languages: english, spanish, a little bit of french but nothing to write home about

favourite songs: i have too many but some notable ones are: somebody to love//queen , i’ve got all this ringing in my ears and none on my fingers // fall out boy , the chain // fleetwood mac , the other side of paradise // glass animals , BLEACH // BROCKHAMPTON etc etc (follow me on spotify)

random fact: i have a snake tattoo and i named it keanu

aesthetic: wannabe goth, retired emo kid, tacky goth tourist, clowncore, depression but make it fashion, it varies from moment to moment

i tag..... @gebbylee @moonnddust @loki-odinstan

and uhh anyone who sees this

[kingshixld]

I work at an animal shelter and some of the shit we see is awful so like. tw animal cruelty & death. don’t feel like you have to read this. like. I just needed to get it off my chest and I didn’t want to shove it on anyone specifically so I threw it here. I need to vent because it’s fucking heart breaking. thats all this is.

so we sort of develop a sick sense of humor because thats literally the only way we can deal with some of the shit we see. but like. it’s hard to keep joking because we’re all trying to not let this thing fuck us up but we all know it’s seriously fucking us up anyway?? so the jokes seem pointless but we’re still trying and i just. like some days i’m fine. i can joke and it actually helps make the awful shit seem less real. today it was just too much shit and i couldn’t brush it off bc holy fuck it was so bad.

animal control showed up and hunted me down because I was the only one who knew how to do intake office stuff who was there today. so he was like “hey come take a picture of this dog” and i knew it was a dead one, thats the only reason he’d want me to take it now before he puts in hte freezer instead of waiting until tomorrow when im actually working in the office. but then he makes a joke “well. i think it’s a dog” and i thought it was just a joke, you know haha this poor dog got hit by a car.

no. he was completely serious. this dog got run over about ten times before somebody finally called ACO to go pick it up out of the middle of the road. it was so twisted and shredded i legit almost puked when he opened the bag. and i had to take a picture and i have to save it because if someone ends up calling to see if that’s their dog i have to show them that photo. the dog didnt have tags or a microchip (that we could tell... it was honestly so fucked up that it took us a few minutes to find its head)

like its bad enough when a dog gets hit by a car once. but people kept hitting it. this is someones pet. their best friend. they’re most likely out worried sick looking for him and calling his name but he won’t be able to respond because a bunch of assholes fucking tore him to pieces with their cars without giving any fucks at all. i see shit like this a lot but i’ve never seen a dog so bad. the girl who trained me, who works intake 5 days of the week, was even shocked and she’s been there for almost 5 years so she’s seen it all before. 

and to add to that, a different animal control guy brought in a dog and he fucking strangled the shit out of it. like what the hell, yes the dog was aggressive but he nearly killed it. we had to rush him to the emergency pet care clinic and he was passed out from lack of oxygen. there was so much blood everywhere because this ACO guy didn’t give any shits about the dog. if you don’t care about htem why the hell do you have this job?? 90% of ACO workers are wonderful. they care about the animals, they’ll ask us how they’re doing, they’ll bring treats to go visit some of their favorites that they’ve brought in. they care so damn much and that’s why they do this job. to help the animals. but then you’ve got this asshole, who’s been doing this for a long fucking time. he’s worked the longest out of the current group. he knows better. and he nearly killed this dog because it was being aggressive.

we also have had an outbreak of calici in our stray cats room. and someone, who thankfully got fired recently, was rubbing all over the cats and then going to pet other cats, without gloves (which like. yeah they’re cute. but you don’t do that in our stray rooms. thats where disease and sickness and all the bad shit is. you dont love on teh pets FOR THEIR PROTECTION) but she kept doing it regardless of warnings and knowing that it was bad for them. so we had just one cat with calici, and now we’ve got 5 confirmed cases and 9 more possible cases. the vet is suggesting that we put down every single cat in our stray room (which is about 50 cats rn) so that we can completely bleach the room and 100% for sure get rid of the calici to save all the other cats. and the scary thing is that it spread to our adoption room too. we found the first case of it in adopt. so that means some customers might have picked it up and spread it to the other cats up there. they might have taken it home to their cats. 

its fucking terrifying and heart breaking. because we’re actually even listed on the wikipedia page about calici because several years back we had to PTS nearly 200 cats in order to contain the outbreak because it spread so badly (that was in the old shelter though. they’ve since changed ownership, completely changed hte staff, adn moved to a new location. we refuse to let it get that bad again.) and i just hate that this is a problem because someone was a careless idiot about our safety regulations. we have parvo and calici in our stray rooms literally because of one fucking idiot. 

okay i got this all out. i had a good cry. im gonna go drown myself in coffee and chocolate and try to feel better. 

[fusion-vents]

i am so tired of always being the strong one

of never being able to ask for help because no one will give it to me

i love helping people, dont get me wrong

i love my friends and i want to help them

i want to use the knowledge that i have to help them get better

but sometimes

sometimes i just want someone to be there for me and not the other way around

i want to be able to tell people “hey, i’m not doing good right now, can we do this/can we not do this”

i want to be able to admit i’m in a bad place without everyone jumping down my throat about how they’re in a bad place too and it doesn’t give me an excuse to not do something

the way it is now i don’t even tell people when im feeling seriously suicidal. i just deal with it. and deal with it. and deal with it. because telling my mom that i don’t feel up to looking for work right now because i’d literally rather OD on coke or something won’t get me anywhere. she’ll just tell me “well, you need to look for work anyway. you think i wanna look for work?”

i know she doesn’t. but the circumstances are different.

i’m bipolar and schizophrenic. when i hit a low it’s really easy for me to step off that last ledge into full-fledged suicidal planning because i don’t think anyone cares or would even try to help me. and it is so fucking hard to rein myself back in once those thoughts start. it is so hard to remind myself that there are a lot of people, my mom included, who would be torn to pieces if i killed myself. because when i hit those lows it doesn’t feel like it. when she tells me it’s bad for her too, it doesn’t feel like it. because she’s not thinking like i am. she doens’t see the world the way i do.

she, at worst, has some depressed tendencies. and i don’t mean to make that sound like it’s not as bad as what i’m going through because i know it sucks but. she doesn’t have to deal with the extra shit i deal with. she doesn’t have to deal with knowing that she can be fine today and then spend two+ weeks wanting to drink bleach rather than deal with anything at all, all while having that little voice tell her that she’d be better off dead anyway. that no one cares. that dad hates her. that i hate her. that no one would miss her. and that, suddenly, she could be fine again. like it didn’t happen.

but i do have to deal with it. depressive episodes scare the piss out of me when i’m neutral because i’ve dealt with them for so long and i know i get deep into it when i get into it.

i’ve been dealing with the symptoms of bipolar disorder since i was eleven. i turn fucking twenty this year. and since 13/14 i’ve had the added bonus of dealing with schizophrenia and the all the bullshit it brings with it. i dealt with both without a diagnosis until i was 18, never knowing what the fuck was wrong with me and why i acted like that.

i thought i was just depressed.

i thought i just had anger issues.

i thought everybody had to constantly poke their head out of their room because they heard someone knock only for there to be nothing there. i thought everybody saw full-body shadow people darting around the house but only when they weren’t looking directly at them. i thought everybody dealt with constant soul-deep paranoia that someone was going to kill them. that no one liked them. that they had forgotten to lock their bedroom door so some strange monster was going to come drag them off into the abyss where they’d choke on shadows for the rest of eternity.

it wasn’t until i was fucking 18 that i learned that, no. not everybody experiences those things. no, i wasn’t just depressed. i didn’t just have anger issues.

i started going to therapy because of what i thought were anger issues.

and yeah, i do have them. i have a terrible temper, primarily because i don’t ever let myself express it until a bunch of shit has built up.

but after the assessment i was told, no. you have bipolar disorder. maybe some anger issues. but your symptoms and circumstances tell me you have bipolar disorder. and after i got more comfortable with the counselor and told her about the other stuff she said, “honey, that’s... that’s schizophrenia. you have schizophrenia.”

god i cannot tell you how liberating it was to be able to put names to what i was going through

but anyway

the point is

life sucks, i want somebody to confide in when i feel an episode coming on, and i’m starting to deeply consider the idea that i might need to start seeing a therapist again