#literally wtf are these midnight thoughts rn. i get the post but wtf are these tags

[memberment]

The End Is Near

I'm sorry, but having running gags across my fics is so fucking funny to me. Like I think this is the third fic I've mentioned NO ONE wanting to get Clyde started on the topic of vampires since I first thought about it and it has made me laugh every single time.

I have another three where it is implied in some way shape or form that Bebe literally drives like a fucking lunatic (and does it well) b/c she loves NASCAR or wanted to be a NASCAR driver in some way shape or form (this spawned from a phoned in joke in Tweek's version of guide)

AND THERE ARE SO MANY OTHERS BUT LIKE THESE TWO MAKE ME LAUGH SO HARD. (I'm thinking about this bc I'm working on the end and I have just implemented the gag of Clyde not shutting the fuck up about vampires (Tolkien and Craig are both annoyed by this.) LMFAO)

Anyways I'm 15.6k into book 3. Craig's chapter might be ridiculously long, but I am not giving him two LMFAOOO.

1:35 guys I'm doing something fucking insane rn LMFAO

3:42 okay, I just finished doing the insane thing. Do you guys wanna know how many words I wrote, in this the month of August 2024??

128,607.

This does not include minor edits, notes, or anything not SP related. IT HAS JUST BECOME AUGUST 20TH. I HAVE WRITTEN 770 WORDS SINCE MIDNIGHT. I'm laughing so fucking hard. Anyways. Decided I'm gonna be posting a monthly wrap up that's gonna have everything I've written the entire month. If I knew I was gonna be on AO3 longer than seven fanfics, I would've been doing this, but live and learn, right? Idk what I'm gonna post it on though bc that would abs fuck my word count LMFAOOOOOOO. Also ao3 posts only allow 500k characters, this single doc that contains 19 days plus four hours has 708240.

Maybe I'll just drop the link somewhere. This is literally insane behavior. BUT I ALREADY CAME THIS FAR LIKE I NEED TO SHARE THIS LMFAOOOOO

Anyways now I'm rereading Genesis bc I can't pick a fucking project so Genesis updates may or may not be here. Also, I am starting to wonder at what point does something go for horror elements to straight up horror. Because I fear I have definitely breached into horror territory with that one. LMFAO. Also I'm probably posting Tammy's chapter early because honestly I want these fucking intros out of the way SO I CAN GET TO THE STORY LIKE NO ONE UNDERSTANDS THEY'RE DRIVING ME INSANE. WE NEED TO BE ON CHAPTER THIRTEEN LIKE YESTERDAY. OR FOURTEEN. OR 25-26. screams.

I'm laughing. Here y'all go. It's 253 pages rn. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1inE_K8XDazRiUoTgNz2CtBOBp9kkdDk8yBzU8s444lo/edit?pli=1

NEVER FUCKING MIND IT GOT DELETED WOW LMFAOOOOOO

I JUST STRESS DOWLOADED LIKE ALL MY FICS BC IDK WTF JUST HAPPENED LMFAOOOO WOW THAT WAS SO RUDE

I HAVE A BACKUP BUT NOW I'M AFRAID TO POST IT LIKE WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TF

(4:59) I figured out how I'm doing this LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOO

alright I'm not doing it all at once though bc if I get flagged on here I'm gonna start TWEAKINGGG

but it's happening LMAO

6:27 there is now a Tumblr account with everything I have written so far for the month of august. One of the posts is literally the size of 45 pages worth of google docs. HERE YALL GO.

anyways I'm going back to being insane and rereading genesis goodbye

[icanthidefrommyfamilyline]

i just realized that i never posted on here about midnights when it came out so this is my extremely late reaction to midnights:

OMG GUYS I LOVE MIDNIGHTS SM TAYLOR IS A GENIUS WTF

LIKE WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT TO RELEASE 8 EXTRA TRACKS???? THAT ARE LITERALLY SOME OF THE BEST SONGS ON THE ALBUM???

MY FAVS RN ARE MAROON, SWEET NOTHINGS, MASTERMIND, AND THE GREAT WAR BUT I LOVE THE ENTIRE ALBUM AHSJDGJA

anyways so thats that, just needed to get that done and documented

[navramanan]

everytime i step out the door i'm like. need to be the sweetest girl while throwing away trash. walking on the pavement. buying groceries. roaming around in the plant store. crossing the road. waiting at the bus stop. on the public transport

[grxceblqckthxrn]

hi @chocolatecarstairs came up with these post-CHOG questions and i really want to answer them because im sad that im finished reading it :((

MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW

what was your favorite part, 1 or 2?

Honestly I loved both parts, but I’d say I loved part two just a little bit more for the time that James wasn’t under the curse anymore and LOVED Cordelia

which scene in the book was your favorite?

EVERY scene that had Matthew and James being wholesome parabatai in it!!! my favourite chapter in this book was Blue Ruin, the one after Grace takes the bracelet back from James  (aside from the whispering room ofc).

what scene (or scenes) made you cry the most?

ok ngl i didnt spend much of this book crying, but the only scene that actually made me tear up was when james was dying and matthew could feel it and jesse (WHO I FUCKING LOVED MORE THAN I THOUGHT I WOULD) gave him his last breath :(((((

what scenes were unsatisfactory?

there were not enough Christopher scenes (but to be fair, even if the entire book was just Christopher it still wouldnt be enough for me)

but fr, i cant think of any off the top of my head but i’ll edit this if i do later

what made you laugh the most?

matthew!! james!! thomas!! christopher!! also some of the things Jesse said

what bored you?

this wasn’t boring, but the whole charles/alastair plot line didn’t have me very invested. I did love the alastair/ cordelia scenes tho, so it was just charles that was the problem

also no offense to james bc he was my first actual fictional crush after reading TMH/NBS but like whenever he talked about being in grace i would literally zone out lol the bracelet curse makes him so boring but whenever he isnt in the curse/ is with someone who is NOT grace i just!! love him!!

what disappointed you?

cassie honestly had me kinda shipping matthew/cordelia for a solid FIVE SECONDS there when he stepped in to dance with her after james left her standing there, but that was one of the only scenes that made me feel like they had natural chemistry (along with the scene where he drops her off at her house). I felt like the during the rest of their interactions in the book, cordelia was kind of uncomfortable, which made me really sad because even tho she has every right to feel that way, i felt bad for matthew. I kind of want him to fall for someone else completely and for it to be reciprocated. also, i just really want for matthew and cordelia to become good friends because i feel like they could have such great natural chemistry if matthew didnt love her.

what is the top thing you wish had been done differently?

see above.

what things did you predict that came true?

JAMES BURNING DOWN BLACKTHORN MANOR I FUCKING SAID HE WOULD DO IT TWO FUCKING YEARS AGO IF YALL WANT ME TO LINK THE THEORY LMK

what are some things that were really unexpected?

ok there’s quite a few things here so bear w me babes:

- James genuinely loving cordelia from the start. I wasn’t expecting him to naturally feel nothing for grace at all, so i was expecting a slow burn jordelia, but finding out that he actually loves her makes me so happy but the end where cordelia thinks he was just pretending breaks my heart :(((

-matthew liking cordelia lol definitely was not expecting another parabatai love triangle but i hope it doesnt last. i do think it adds to the plot and i love it, it just hurts to see matthew so emo :(((

-I was expecting to like cordelia as a character, but i ended up LOVING her so fucking much???? she’s so three dimensional to me, and it’s interesting to see how her personality adapts around different characters as people adapt around different social circles irl

-liking jesse as much as i did

-ok so james’ entire character was a surprise to me. it’s so fascinating to see how the bracelet actually affected his personality.If you recall him in The Midnight Heir from TBC. he’s like an entirely different person. i still loved him in TMH but i went into CHOG thinking that if he was gonna be like that the entire time i’d probably get over him really quickly. i was pleasantly surprised by how much i ended up loving him even more tho

-i didn’t expect oliver hayward to die and im going to stay emo about it

- Christopher is so much more clear headed than he was made out to be prior?? like there were so many scenes where he was fully there and when he defended anna to alastair i just kfdsnfkld i love him

are there characters that you didn’t like before that you like now?

yikes umm... Alastair, maybe? he’s somewhat okay to me now, I dont dislike him as much as I used to. ooh and Hypatia Vex. the only scene i remember liking her in QOAAD was when she helped out kit, ty and dru (me, going a whole TSC post without somehow mentioning kit? not possible)

are there characters that you liked before that you don’t like now?

I started CHOG ready to give Grace the benefit of the doubt, and I was surprised by how timid and shy she seemed at the start, but it was interesting to see how it was all an act and how she doesn’t have an actual personality yet. one could argue that she actually does love james, but i doubt it at this point. i dont hate her yet, even tho she IS fucking up james’ life, but she’s on thin fucking ice.

who was your favorite new character?

does new character mean completely new or just never been in a novella new? because for the first, it would be Cordelia (i LOVE her sm!!) and other wise it would be james, matthew and co. also!!! jesse!!

what places in the book would you like to visit?

that hell dimension sounds pretty lit ngl

did you like the ending?

ok so. we KNOW that jordelia is gonna be endgame. cassandra clare always takes the hardest path to get there, but when has she not delivered? it’s just a matter of waiting. so, yes, i did like the ending in sense of the plot because it was a great twist, but i also feel really bad for all of them even tho ik they’re eventually gonna be together :(((

what did you think of the epilogue?

i wasnt surprised, since we alr know that Tatiana is shady asf, but i just really wanna know how she partnered up with a GREATER demon like lol wtf. again, im really happy in terms of plot with this

what are your thoughts on the engagement?

i feel so. fucking bad. for cordelia. and james too, even tho he’s under the bracelet’s curse so he doesnt even KNOW he’s being manipulated. but i love how even through the curse, james still loves cordelia in his own way.

what did you want to see that didn’t happen?

matthew getting therapy periodt

umm honestly i just want more “merry thieves” content like i just love. all of them.

what do you wish had been resolved that wasn’t?

i really want matthew to tell james or cordelia what happened because i just need him to be loved and supported lol i want to give him a hug. 

what is your favorite pairing as of now?

jordelia!!! and lucie and jesse are kind cute rn, and i like them if theyre gonna be pining after eachother but i feel like if they actually get together i wont like the relationship as much.

which characters would you like to see more of in the next book?

CHRISTOPHER CHRISTOPHER CHRISTOPHER 

ANNA!!! i lovED reading about her she’s so badass

matthew!! jesse!! also i wanna see more of those bitchy girls lol just so we can see anna or cordelia tell them to stfu

what is one character whose death you would undo if you could?

ok i know that jesse is still very much a conscious character despite being dead but like,,, i want him to be the way he was before and also i want him to come back to life

and barbara!! she seemed so sweet 

which characters got bad/unsatisfactory endings?

ummm barbara? i cant really say much on this yet bc its still only the first book and when has the first book ever ended up with anyone being happy.

oh but also can we sign a petition to make cassie let matthew actually survive the series because my heart aches just at the THOUGHT of eventually having to read a scene where he dies

which characters got what they deserved?

literally. none of them yet. :(

who should have died but didn’t?

Tatiana lol also lowkey charles but i also feel pity him to an extent 

what plotline are you most excited to see in the next book?

okay the entire jesse plot has me hooked because i LOVE his character. also i love the bracelet plot but its making me MAD because i just want james to be happy but

what is one scene that you wish hadn’t happened, but you know was unavoidable?

THE ONE WHERE GRACE PUTS THE BRACELET BACK ON JAMES. i mean obv there was no way he was completely done with grace, but i literally got so sad at that part like why HIM of all people smfh let him be happy

which pairing do you like the least?

alastair x charles, grace x james, lucie x matthew bc neither of them actually like either imo lol

what are some theories you have for chain of iron?

- not necessarily for COI but i think matthew is gonna get exiled and turned into made into a mundane

- the bracelet will break (?)

- jesse will come back to life (like actual life) at the end of the book

-grace is gonna do something to help the main characters, making it hard for us to hate her.

what characters do you think should have gotten more plot time?

lol are yall gonna hate me if i say christopher again (also anna)

anyways this was really fun!!!!! PLEASE ASK ME STUFF ABOUT MY OPINIONS AND STUFF OR JUST SAY ANYTHING ABT THE BOOK BC IM DESPERATE TO TALK TO PPL ABOUT IT

[writingisbetterthandying]

Misunderstanding - GD

A/N: This was the first fic-fic I actually wrote so I edited it so let’s see how it does!

legitimately very cringy but I chose to keep it up! I wrote this in 2018?

Warnings: Language, Angst

Word Count: 1.8k

Your POV

I love Grayson Bailey Dolan. That is a fact. A well known fact to almost everybody, or at least that's what I thought.

We met three years ago in Jersey, when I was with my grandparents for the summer. I was reaching for a pancake mix, but it had been conveniently placed on the very top shelf. A cute boy with brown hair saw me struggling handed me the box.

We exchanged numbers and talked for a while before heading our separate ways. That boy was Grayson.

We spent the entire summer together [with Ethan too] and then I had found out that they would be moving to LA, where I already lived. We've been dating for almost three years, and it's been a dream. One of the reasons why we've lasted this long is our shared love for film, which is actually why I'm still in LA (besides the twins), is that I'm in film school, and I help them film all the time.

I'm working on a project for one of my classes, and to switch things up, I decided to use my friend Kian as a subject. The twins also happened to be in New York at the moment for TRL, but I still did want to spend time with Kian. Things were always a little tense with the twins and Kian, with the whole Meredith situation, but they both respected my relationship with the other. 

Kian being one of my best friends, had asked me to come over and hang out, and then I asked him if his house members would want to be in my short film. 

They said yes, so I drove over with all of my equipment. 

When I knocked on the door, JC answered and we caught up a little before Kian saw me and toppled me before I even got through the door. 

"You ready to film!!?!??" He practically yelled into my ear. 

"Okay first off, lower your voice, and don’t forget Lawley, this is still my project."

"Yes ma'am," he said with a little salute. 

Almost 3 hours later, filming was done.

"Great job everybody! Thank you for allowing me to do my film y’all, I should get home and edit, but I'll see you guys soon and send you the finished project!"

I was met with a cacophony of "But it's late!" "You should stay the night" "Don't go Y/N!" "We love you please stay!"

I finally gave in, slipped my shoes back off, put down my bag, and plopped on the couch.

"Okay then, what movie are we watching?"

"Well are you guys ready for a Jim Carrey marathon?"

Shouts of disagreement were spread out throughout the room.

"Rude- like you didn't have to be so mean about it like I thought we were friends guys! I thought you guys loved me but I guess none of you would care if I just locked myself in my room all night and cried. Like-" Bobby on the opposite couch had had enough.

"Kian if you don't shut up right now I swear I will lock you out of the house and clear out your room and you can find it all on the curb tomorrow morning."

"But then Y/N could just welcome me into her home."

I shook my head and told him he was on his own, and in return was promptly flipped off.

We eventually started a High School Musical marathon but soon everyone went to their rooms or fell asleep, so it was just me and Kian. He turned to me once the movie ended.

"Y/N, wake up!" I groaned in response, still only half awake.

"You should spend the night man, it’s late."

At this I startled awake, remembering that the twins were supposed to come in from their flight around this time.

"No- I have to get home!"

"Wait why? It’s after midnight?"

"I don't know when Gray gets back, well I do, but you know it’s late, and I want to be there when he gets home."

"God, you're such a nice girlfriend. Okay, go home, but please be safe driving!"

"Thank you Kian, I love you!"

"Love you too now go get your mans!"

I finally got home after the short drive and got up to the house. Once I unlocked the door, I screamed at first, because I was scared that it could have been an intruder, and then it turned to excitement. Gray was home.

"Hi bubba I'm glad you're home!" I leaned in to hug Gray, but he didn't accept the embrace. "Is everything okay? How was set?"

"I dunno, how about you ask Kian," he responded curtly. He seemed tense and honestly pissed.

"You know Kian is just a friend, bubba." Who does he think he is?

Grayson's POV: 3 hours ago

We had boarded the plane a while ago when Ethan showed me a picture of my girlfriend all cuddled up with Kian on Harrison's instagram. The caption was "harrisonwebb97 the gabriella to his troy.

"What the hell is this??"

"Gray, they're just friends. I don’t like him but they’re close. "

"Friends don't hold each other like that. And that caption too- like what the fuck dude?"

"She's known Kian for forever though, have trust in her, plus like look at everyone right next to them too."

"I'll text her later." I did text her later, a lot actually.

where are you?

getting on the plane...

i love you

is your phone off?

please answer me

y/n answer me wtf is going on rn

are you having fun?

kian looks like he's having a blast, holding you like that

i bet you and kian hooked up after that picture on harrison's instagram

well now i'm not the only one in LA.  

whatever, I'll see you at home

maybe I should have kissed that fan at the airport, she probably would be less of a slut then you.

Delivered 11:34 pm

I left voicemails too. I knew they were just friends, but she would've answered me by now- she always answers. The delay could only mean one thing. At first I was upset and hurt but now I'm pissed. This is all so stupid.

Grayson's POV: Present

"And friends lend each other sweatshirts." She should know what she did.

"What are you talking about?"

It took her a while before she realized she was wearing Kian's sweatshirt. "He gave it to me while we were watching the movies, I was cold, that's all."

"That doesn't even make sense but what were you doing there in the first place?"

Your POV

Now I was mad. I thought that after everything he would understand that I was loyal to him and only him. He knows that Kian and I are friends.

"I was there to shoot my project and then they asked me to stay for some movies! And it’s just a damn jacket, Gray." He wasn't the only one angry now.

"Well why didn't you answer your phone?"

"My phone was off? You know that- whenever I shoot I have my phone off! Sorry I forgot to turn it back on? What’s your deal right now, because you’re getting so aggro I’m starting to get mad.”

"Check your phone." His face was stoic, and he completely dismissed my words.

I read the messages. All of them. I didn't even want to think about what was on that voicemail. He knew my insecurities-he knows them.

His words had tears starting to trickle down my face, "You don't trust me?" How could he be so presumptive? There’s never been anything like that between Kian and I or anyone else but him for that matter.

"Why should I? I mean you're the one whoring around." His face was blank- and it was scary. Scary how when he’s usually just such a bright and uplifting person, to this dark and angry guy.

The tears just kept on coming, and I could do nothing to stop them. After everything, and this is how he treats me? After one post on social media, he’s calling me such horrible names?

He started to turn away towards the door with his still packed suitcase.

"Three years," I mumbled through my tears. He probably couldn't even be bothered to hear me.

"What?" As he turned around I could tell he was annoyed, but I was heartbroken because my boyfriend, or ex boyfriend- whatever he was now- had said these things. I couldn’t believe how the person I trust the most could be saying such vile and hateful things.

"Three years of trust, of an honest and strong relationship! Gray- I love you. I love you and only you. I thought we had established that but I guess we aren’t on the same page. Kian and I have never been anything more than friends, and you know he has a thing for Franny. I was cold! That was all! I turn my phone off when I film, and you of all people should know this. When I walked through that door I expected to see the man I love almost as excited to see me as I was for him, because of how much I love and miss you. You know that I trust you. You know how I feel about the literal millions of girls pining after you day after day, yet somehow I’m the one you chose. I thought that we had a mutual understanding and that we both trusted another and that we loved each other. I love you Grayson Bailey Dolan. Why can't you see it? Everyone else can."

At the last line I fell to my knees as I sobbed. My body wouldn't stop shaking and my face was probably all blotchy and puffy but I didn't care, I just felt heartbroken.

Grayson's POV

I knew I fucked up. We've gotten into fights before, but nothing too major, and they've been small and it ends with some ice cream. Cute and happy couple-y shit. Not tonight- tonight the only sound in the apartment was the sound of her soft and shaking sobs.

"Look I'm sorry I neve-"

"Why? I mean the things you said," she croaked, and I felt my heart break when I saw the look in her eyes, filled with sadness and fear.

"I was scared, I mean like Look at Kian! He could have anyone." She started to almost laugh? I swear I heard her chuckle.

"Grayson, I told you. Kian has a thing for Franny, and it is mutual, they just aren't official yet. I love you, and only you, and Kian's my friend and all, but I would never actually date him. He’s basically my brother! I don’t see why you can’t just believe what I have to say!”

She was still crying and all I wanted was to hold her. And to apologize over and over again, and to tell her how stupid I was for ever making her so upset.

I wrapped my arms around her, and while she still was tense, she relaxed slightly. I rocked the two of us in silence for a bit, then decided to speak. 

"I'm an idiot." She scoffed at that.

"That has been established."

"And an asshole."

"Yes."

"And extremely jealous..."

"No shit Sherlock! What the hell was that!" She slapped my arm with that, but I know she intended no harm. 

"...and a terrible boyfriend." This received no response, so I continued. "I shouldn't have acted the way I did. I should never have said the things that I did, regardless of if it was an impulsive move or not. Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N I love you and I fucked up. I want to spend the rest of my life with you and I promise to never doubt your love and trust again. Hell, I don't want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to spend eternity with you, and there's no way you’re getting rid of me. I want to raise a family with you. I want to move back to Jersey with you, I want to live my life with you, and I want everything, but I only want it with you-and now you're crying again." She had turned around, and was holding me close. 

"You want a family in Jersey? With me?" She looked up at me with tears still in her eyes, this time hopefully happy tears, but she still sounded scared and unsure. That uncertainty in our future made me feel so horrible.

"Of course. You're the one thing always on my mind and I love you, and only you, forever and always."

"Forever and always" she whispered, and she looked up at me, and now she's actually smiling! "Bailey, I love you, but don't test me again, okay?" she was finally wiping the tears off of her beautiful face.

"I got you Y/N, and I love you too, now lets go to bed okay?"

"Okay."

It would be alright, with time, but for now, they both just needed to hold each other and sleep it off.