#literally slayed my life when i heard it

[satorusugurugurl]

Malevolent Queen

Summary: During his reign in the Heian Era, Sukuna is used to Jujutus Sorcerers attempting to exorsize or seal him. What he wasn't used to was you. You were the strongest he'd faced in a long time. You were so strong, he had to make you his.

Pairing: Ryomen Sukuna x FAB!Jujutus Sorcerer

Word Count: 1,507

Warnings: Smut, fighting, (corruption kink?)

A/N: This was a fun suggestion submitted by @sukunasfangurl! I had so much fun writing this while I did my infinity hoop. I hope you enjoy!

Sukuna wasn’t at all phased when he heard a commotion outside his chambers. He glanced at the door briefly before laying his head back down amongst the mountains of pillows flooding his bed. It was most likely another puny sorcerer trying to exorcize him. His loyal followers would be able to handle such a futile attempt.

Why should he raise a finger against the weak?

What he had not been anticipating was for his chamber door to fly open, quite literally off the hinges. Which was surprising, seeing as they had to weigh over two hundred pounds from being adorned with gold. But what was even more surprising was catching sight of the person responsible for the destruction.

A puny jujutsu sorcerer stepped into his chambers. Who was a woman, nonetheless? A woman? How did you manage to get past his forces?

“Ryomen Sukuna!” You yelled. Blood splattered your face as tears left streaks through the crimson. “I’ve come to exorcize you!”

“Foolish woman,” he barked, “you will do no such thing! I, however, will be sending you to meet your maker.”

Sukuna moved in a flash, appearing before your eyes. Killing you would be simple; all he needed to do was rip your throat open with his nails. Doing so would allow him to watch your pretty face turn pale as your blood stained his floor. His fantasies shattered the second he towered over you because you slammed a black flash punch directly into his abdomen.

The blow sent him flying back, hitting the wall with a sickening crunch. He remained still, trying to process what had just occurred. You, a woman, had sent him crashing into a wall. Your body was radiating with cursed energy. The raw power had your hair flying back as you approached him. The sight of you drowning in fury had sent blood rushing to his cock.

“You slayed an entire village! One that so selflessly helped me! Every innocent man, woman, and child!!” You unsheathed your katana. “For that, you will pay with your life!!”

Amid your monologue, Sukuna’s eyes trailed over your body, from the curves of your figure to the mounds of your breasts. Your kimono was stained with blood, soot, and dirt. Despite the gore, your beauty was indescribable. Not only were you seemingly strong, but you were far more beautiful than any of his concubines. He might even say the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

You charged at him again, katana slashing forward, embedded with your cursed energy. Sukuna easily dodged your attack this time, and he was happy that he did. Because of your attack, a crater was now embedded in his wall.

“You're strong, human.”

“Coming from you, that's a compliment.” You barked back, slashing again. This time, he blocked it, grimacing as you stared into each other's eyes. “But flattery will not save your head!” You screamed, slashing over and over again.

Sukuna’s cock throbbed as he smirked. He hadn’t been this entertained in months. His grin slowly faded as you dropped to the ground, spinning to knock him off his feet with your leg. While falling, you hit him with another black flash, a scream of anguish following your movements.

The pure rage in your eyes had Sukuna in awe as you tossed your katana to the side. Your movements were fast, like a viper, and Sukuna watched you straddle his hips, holding your kunai against his throat. He waited for you to say something instead, but words seemed to evade you as your cheeks turned a bright red.

For the first time since you had entered the room, you let your guard down. All because you could feel a hard cock pressing against your ass. You had to be dreaming; this wasn’t real. The King of Curses was not erect right now. But as you pushed back against the bulge, he groaned out loud, smirking.

“I can confirm that it is, in fact, my cock.”

“You’re disgusting!”

Sukuna’s large, calloused hands rested on your hips, holding you in place. “Me? Not in the slightest.” He admired your features, not that you say above him. “Those villagers you were so distraught over, they were disgusting.” When all you did was cock your head in confusion, Sukuna's smirk grew wider. “They tried offering me their children in exchange for safety from the Jujutsu Sorcerer they claimed to have saved.” Your look of shock had him chuckling. “So I just took it upon myself to kill them all. Imagine my disappointment when I didn’t find a sorcerer there.”

“You’re a lair.” You gritted out through your teeth.

“Don’t believe me? I’m happy to show you the letter they sent.”

Curses were liars, and this specific one happened to be The King of Curses! He would lie about anything to save his skin. It would be better for you and the rest of the world to end his life right now!

His words, however, struck a chord in you. So you allowed him to show you said proof, which he had. Reading the words over and over again soured your stomach. How could they offer their children to beg Sukuna to get rid of you after they had sheltered you and tended to your wounds?

“Humans truly are such parasitic creatures.” Sukuna all but cooed next to your ear as you dropped the letter. “Willing to sacrifice one another just to continue their messily pathetic lives.”

His words had you turning towards him. “They were monsters.” You grimaced at the thought of their children being sacrificed.

“The world is better off without them,” he whispered in your ear, “I want to make this a better world for people like me. A world I would like to keep you in.” His tongue darted out, trailing down your neck. “You’re the strongest, most brutal woman I’ve ever had the pleasure of fighting. What do you say about ruling by my side? Together, we can rid this world of these parasites. What do you say, my malevolent queen.”

You wanted to deny him, to tell him that he was insane. He would never stoop to his level, but you had seen the proof, the cold, hard evidence. That proved humans were just as bad as curses. If not worse.

He was right.

Which was how you ended up on his bed, bouncing up and down on his cock. “Fuck~ yes, take what you want! Show me your power.” Sukuna’s hands gripped your hips so hard you were certain that you would have marks there, along with the rest of your body. You would be a tapestry of his kisses and bruising fingertips.

“Lord Sukuna~!” You screamed as he hammered his cock up into your cunt with such power and speed that it had you seeing stars.

“Take my cock~ take it inside that tight wet cunt!~”

“Yes, my lord!” You cried out as he reached his hand up, choking you. “S-Sukuna!” You cried out as you slammed yourself in tandem with his thrusts.

“You’re mine now, little sorcerer. Together, we will rule the world, my queen!”

Between his words and his hand wrapped around your throat, you stood no chance against him. It was as though he was made for you. His cock hit your G-spot perfectly. The two of you fit together like two shards of broken glass. It was hard to imagine wanting to kill him now that he was inside of you. He had shown you the truth.

A truth you would not stand by.

Sukuna smirked, his free hand reaching down and rubbing your clit back and forth. He could see the darkness, the blood lust in your eyes. The desire to rule with him, to make this a world for the two of you! He had never been so thrilled someone had come to kill him.

“Cum on my cock Y/N~ cum for your king!”

Sukuna squeezed your throat harder, cutting off your air as your body jerked, as you squirted all over his crotch and ab’s. The intensity of your orgasm sent Sukuna into his own. His nails dug into your skin as he brutally fucked you. His cock slams into your cervix with each thrust. You gasped for air as he used both his hands to slam you down on him, your bodies conjoined in the rawest form.

Your eyes fluttered, exhaustion from the fighting and the sex overcoming you. Your palms pressed firmly against his chest as you sighed, happy to finally rest. The rest was short-lived asSukuna laughed maniacally, flipping you over, pushing you into the blankets that smelt of sweat and sex.

“We’re far from being over. I don’t plan on stopping until your cunt has every vein of my cock memorized Y/N.” You cried out in pained pleasure as Sukuna snapped his hips into you. Sukuna grinned. You had no one but yourself to blame. You were the strongest he’d faced in a long while, and you would be able to handle this.

[asumi2020202]

Everything has a Price to Pay

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x reader

Summary: Daemon's hired men, whilst trying to slay Aemond in his bed, accidentally harmed his wife and his son and Aemond blames his wife for it.

A/n: The 2nd episode of s2 broke my heart. The way Helaena clung to her son's blanket. But anyways, this is something which is somewhat based on the storyline of ep 1 and 2 of s2 but unlike the directors taking out Alys Rivers from the show, I'm including her. Thank you for reading!

______ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ___________________________

All throughout the kingdom, you were known to be the gentlest of souls much like your sister. Though she was naive and all too forgiving, you were a bit unlike her. You preferred knowledge but both of you were kind.

Your marriage to Aemond was exactly like Aegon and Helaena's. To keep the bloodline pure. Except the only difference was that both of you loved each other and that he was not like Aegon.

You always stayed with either your sister or your husband ever since a child. Or sometimes you would accompany your eldest brother, he only had you who understood him.

Unlike his brother and nephews, you didn't tease and harrass Aemond, for you too knew what it felt like to not be heard. He felt as if he could only seek comfort in you and his mother as a child and even now.

When he had claimed Vhagar, he had to pay the cost with his eye.

He realised he loved you when the maester and maids tried to usher you away saying the stitching and mending to his face would too horrific to see for your gentle soul yet you stood your ground and held his hand while your mother pleaded for justice.

You felt hate for your father. For he blindly trusted his daughter, disregard anyone else. If someone even asks him your name he probably would not be able to say.

After that incident in the Red Keep, your half-sister's family fled to Dragonstone.

_________________________________________

War had started. Your mother along with your grandsire, successfully installed Aegon on the throne. Your husband Aemond had took the life of your nephew.

You knew that the House of the Dragon would tear each other apart. With no literal escape.

It was only some days before your child would be born. Having your first child with your husband. The only happiness in this devastating time.

Your happiness has crashed down when you got a raven. Your husband was laying with some bastard whore in Harrehal. The only thoughts you would get were

Did he not love me? He always swore that he would never leave me and stay by my side, that he will be different than our father.

He looked happy when he got to know of our child yet he is laying with another woman.

What did I do wrong?

Why did he lie?

He left you right when the war had been declared and he finalized it by killing your nephew.

Your mother tried to help you. Completely disappointed in her son. She raised him better yet he still did this. Harming her daughter, hurting her emotions and dishonouring her.

You stayed with Helaena until the pressure of it all became too much to bear and ultimately pushing you towards your labor.

_________________________________________

You laid in your bed crying, sweating and panting, while your husband was who knows where.

You held tight onto your mother's hand as Helaena quietly said "A price must be paid for all that is done."

Soon enough your child was born. It was a son. Your little Aenor.

Moonfyre's roar were heard. She could sense a new presence. One familiar to her bonded sister.

You cried as you took your son in your arms, your mother kissing your head as your sister gently rubbed your arms.

_________________________________________

Moonfyre had laid her eggs 3 weeks before your son's birth.

It had been a week since you had Aenor. Since your husband, if you can even call him that now, had not returned. You took it upon yourself to get him his own dragon egg.

As you walked through the dragon pit, you saw some dragon keepers scared.

"Moonfyre iksos daor īlva jikagon va zyhōn. Nyke suggest ziry would sagon wise naejot daor jikagon va zyhōn nykeā zyhōn drōma sir." Said a dragon keeper.

Moonfyre is not letting us go near her. I suggest it would be wise to not go near her or eggs now.

"Dīnagon aside. Nyke shall ūndegon skoros nyke kostagon gaomagon." Came your reply.

Move aside. I shall see what I can do.

As you walked further in, you saw you dragon, guarding her precious eggs.

You walked towards her. She's let's out a small noise upon recognising you. You gently placed your hand on her snout and then your forehead. With her wings she gently pushed you towards her eggs, guarding you.

You chose an egg for your son. Before leaving, you patted her snout and scratched it a bit, giving her some comfort.

_________________________________________

Night had already fallen over kings landing. You were with your son in your shared chambers. He had fallen asleep to your gentle humming.

As you were cradling your son to your chest, you heard the door being opened. You thought it was perhaps a maid but as you turned around you saw the rat catcher that comes everyday.

He was smirking and held a knife. Soon after him, entered a muscular man who had a knife as well.

"A son .. for a son he said." Said the muscular man. "Oh but look there, thats his son." Replied the rat catcher to the other man.

As the other one looked at you, you felt dangered.

"I.. have a necklace. It.. is of great value.." you cradled your son closer to your chest with one arm while with the other hand you tried to open the necklace.

The muscular man simply tore it away from your neck. Fear was evident in your eyes. You took a step back as the rat catcher said

"Hand him over and you'll live. We only need him."

As he approached you, you placed your right hand over your right thigh where your own dagger was kept.

The rat catcher tried to forcefully take your son but before he could do so, you kicked him in his crotch. While writhing in pain, he slashed your arm. The other one was coming towards your son, but as he tried to slash him in your arms you turned around.

His blade dug through your back. Muscles getting slashed. Extreme pain courses through you. Yet you didn't give up. U took out your dagger and slashed his cheek and stabbed his chest. As he flinched away, you took your chance and ran out the room, you nightgown red with your blood.

You didn't know where to go. Time was limited. You could hear faint moaning noises. Cradling your son closer to your chest, with your jaw on his head, you followed the noise.

You came infront of your mother's chambers and entered without a second thought. You saw her with Ser Cole but you didn't care about that. Your energy was running out. A lot of blood was lost. You didn't even know if you would survive.

With your remaining strength you said "Mother". You shakily walked to her and somehow gave her your son as you collapsed beside her bed.

Alicent's scream could be heard from everywhere. She couldn't believe her eye. Her little sweet y/n was bleeding out in front of her. She put Aenor on her bed as he wailed out loudly.

Alicent kneeled before her daughter and hugged her to her chest. Her blanket and body getting bloodied. She cried and cried.

Aegon and Helaena had appeared as well. Helaena couldn't watch, tears flowing from her eyes. She took Aenor as a maid escorted them away to her room.

Aegon rushed beside his mother and sister. Gently taking her in his arms as maester Orwyle came through hurriedly, asking Aegon to put you on the bed.

Aegon very carefully laid you on your stomach on the bed. While maester Orwyle asked them to leave the room, both your brother and mother did not stop crying.

_________________________________________

Aemond had landed on the Red Keep. Getting off of Vhagar, he walked inside the castle. As he entered, he could see a man being dragged to the dungeon. Blood everywhere. Maids rushing around.

He saw his brother. But he wasn't as he usually was. He knew after becoming the king, Aegon had changed, but now he looked completely different.

His hair not brushed. Eyes red and tired. Blood. He was covered in blood.

As Aemond walked towards him, he heard Aegon say to a guard "kill every rat catcher you can find. Spare none."

Aegon looked away from the guard and saw Aemond. His eyes filled with fury. He marched towards him and grabbed his collar.

"Finally came back huh brother? It could've been avoided with you here yet you chose your whore over everything else." Aegon said, trying to keep his calm which is very unlikely of him.

Aemond felt ashamed and confused. Ashamed for being disloyal to you and dishonouring the family and confused thinking about what Aegon was saying.

"Look I'm sorry brother, that was a mistake. But do explain what you mean by it could've been avoided. What has happened?"

"Our sister had given birth to your son a week ago. And today she-" Aegon stopped. His tears flowing uncontrollably. "T-today she and my nephew were attacked. She is badly wounded. Maester Orwyle is with her but he said that she lost a lot of blood. That she was already weak from the birth and now this." With this Aegon completely broke down.

Aemond's breathing stopped. He chose his whore over you. The one who always stood up for him. He felt ashamed. So ashamed that he might sink and drown.

He ran towards his mother's room after Aegon told him where you were while he went down the dungeons to deal with the man who dare hurt you.

As Aemond reached, he saw his mother. Scared and fearful. He knew he fucked up bad. As she noticed him, she walked up towards him, looked him in the eyes and slapped him. He deserved it.

_________________________________________

You slowly opened your eyes, trying to take in your surroundings. You saw your husband pacing around the room.

He noticed that you were awake and spoke. "You're awake" you remained silent as you recalled the events of last night.

"Aenor.... My son.. my son Aenor! Is he okay?! Did he get hurt?!" Your enquired as you suddenly sat up, ignoring the pain in your body. Worried for your son.

"He only had a small cut on his feet. Nothing else. He is okay." Aemond replied helping you back down. You felt relieved and finally acknowledged your pain and groaned.

He didn't knew what came over him in an instance. He felt anger towards the ones who hurt you and his son. He was angry with himself but instead it got directed at you.

"If only you had taken better care of the security, none of this would've happened.." he muttered.

"What?" You sat up again, not believing your ears.

"If only you knew how to fight, this would've never happened! You can't fight, can't run, you can't even protect our child like a mother should!! You should have called more guards!!" He shouted while pointing his finger at you.

You got up from your mother's bed and stood as you held onto the bed.

"It is my fault now?! Huh?! You're the one who's irresponsible. You left me!! You left me and my child to fend for ourselves!! You left us for your whore whom you sought comfort in instead of your wife!! Where were you when we were attacked huh?! Were you fucking your whore?! Were you creating your bastards?!

You promised me that you were different. That you would treat me with respect unlike other husbands with their wives. You said you were different but...... You're just more of the same.." your voice raised and came down as tears flowed rapidly. Your would reopened because of how tensed your body was. Your nightgown was starting to get bloodied again.

Aemond was shocked. He yelled at his precious wife. His gentle lady wife. And she who never raised her voice no matter how angry or raged up she may be, shouted at him.

He fucked up greatly.

You winced as you fell to the ground. Blood getting everywhere as Aemond rushed to your side and gently tried to pick you up but you refused.

"Don't. Do not touch me with the hands that you used to hold her. I may be a woman. I may be the most vulnerable, but I have an honor. Neither my son nor do I need you. I will ask Aegon to annul our marriage. After that you may return to your whore and I will raise my son alone." You said, wincing as pain shot through you body.

Your lady in waiting came in and got you up on the bed and called maester Orwyle.

As Aemond got up from the floor, he was speechless. He never knew one mistake would cost him his everything. The words you spoke hurt more than when he lost his eye.

The entire day those words circled his thoughts.

_________________________________________

It had been a week since the last time Aemond met you. He had went to Harrehal and returned. Aemond walked inside your shared chambers after he got to know that you shifted back there. Aegon provided two guards infront of your door.

He watched as you cradle your son to your chest with your left hand which was fine and hummed a valyrian song to him.

You stopped as you as noticed him. You gently put Aenor in his crib and straightened your back.

"I'm sorry" he started.

"You sorry means nothing to me. You say your sorry now but next chance you get you'll run back in her arms." You spoke, gazing out the window.

"There will be no next time. I got rid of everything that would come in between us." He replied as your body stilled after hearing his words.

"Whatever do you mean?" You asked, turning back to face him.

"I got rid of her. All i now need is your forgiveness. For you to accept me again. To trust me again. Please avy jorrāelan. Forgive me this once." He begged as he got down on his knees and held your hand.

You were shocked. He killed her. He killed her without a second thought. You wanted to loathe him but deep down you loved him.

"I don't know..... I don't know anymore. I want to trust you Aemond. But I can't. I can't trust you. You've hurt me far too much.

It'll take a while to heal the scar you inflicted upon me but I will try. I will try to forgive you." You replied shakily.

He got up and hugged you lightly not to press on your wounds.

"Thank you my love. Thank you" he spoke as he kissed your head.

You gave in to his warm embrace. War has started. But right now you just want to be held.

You would think later of how to punish those who dare harm your family.

Those who hurt your son will pay. They will pay with their life. And you will see to it that they burn in flames. You will make sure that they rot in hell even if you too would have to.

After all nothing is for free....

Everything has a Price to Pay.......

-Lillian

[tiktaalic]

catching fire dash simulator

finnicksgirl Follow

my streams have been cutting all season omfg what is going on

caps4finnick Follow

cinnagirl3000 Follow

anybody heard from cinna lately?

plutarcheology Follow

Plutarch Heavensbee circa 2282

revolutionarykatniss

As if it’s not ENOUGH that yall wanna fuck the most morally bankrupt man alive who is more than complicit because he gets paid to live in luxury to ORCHESTRATE the deaths of innocents so that they’re a spectacle and don’t have the option to die even semi peacefully. as if that’s not enough. You wanna fuck him when he’s ugly?

caesarflickerwoman Follow

anyone else still thinking about how caesar and peeta were kinda ..

czrflckmn

Aren’t you the one who had the week long meltdown about peeta being overfamiliar with him

caesarflickerwoman

Well you see I’m gay and a man now

theeclove Follow

already tired of this fucking season of everlark -_- idgaf about the fucking fog

siblingvictors

DISTRICT ONE GONNA SEND THEM A CANCELLATION NOTICE!! #CASHMEREGLOSS4EVER

czrflkmn Follow

everyone looooooves to act like NOTABLE cishet peeta is so gay w caesar as if his gay cohost isn't right there.... slaying in a wig..... sending yearning glances caesar's way right before the camera cuts......

johannadykeson Follow

tbh she’s got the WORST taste in allies idek why i continue to stan. girl MAGS?

#my girl going to get slorn :/

katnissgirlsmakedo

She is choosing with her HEART she chose to save peeta in the games REMEMBERRRRRRRR she’s literally a lovergirl to the core

#lovecore #heartcore #truelove

lucygraydotcom Follow

Caesar flickerman kidn if a laughing gnome. Reblog

finnickforever Follow

I’ve supported finnick through a lot and defended them and I’ve always been proud they're from my district but honestly they went way too far by doing the salute during the interview. I can only hope that they just got caught up in the moment with everyone else doing it and obviously it’s a stressful situation but I don’t think I can continue endorsing them. I’ll be changing my url this week.

divorceekatniss Follow

hey guys i know times are tough for everyone and the capital has really cracked down but my mutual @divorceepeeta got flogged the other day and could really use some help. v3nmo here. anything helps #signalboost #mockingjay

disabledmags Follow

Tbh the baby is the saddest thing I've ever heard </3

peetaspride

Another citizen falling for capital propaganda. It's so glaringly apparent that this is made up to draw in views. The tributes undergo extensive medical examination prior to the games. They would NEVER let a pregnant woman compete.

disabledmags

As if killing children has ever stopped them before?

#We all saw him fall to protect her stomach before they even started the victory tour #Is it that ridiculous to believe two newlyweds fresh out of a life or death situation would celebrate a little carelessly?

peetaspride

If you think even the marriage is real you're stupider than I thought. Peeta spends every interview begging us to see his truth. The capital is shamelessly silencing him and "the baby" is a distraction.

peetasbabymama Follow

URL CHANGE!! faggotpeeta->peetasbabymama

cupcakeeverlark

this isnt funny. peeta's a real person with real feelings. it will never be funny to call someone a f***** as a joke. how would you feel if my url was f*****peetasbabymama?

peetasbabymama

ok

district420

isnt cupcakeeverlark literally prez snow's 12 yr old granddaughter lol

tendinghiswounds

OOMF IS 12???????????

everlarklovechild

the age is the problem here?

marriedeverlark Follow

Canon url 🎉🎊💅😁🥰♥️

beeteemp3 Follow

New content of my favorite tribute 😁😁😁

3ffietrinket

Girl there’s a 96% chance they die ?

peenick Follow

getting reports from the presidential banquet that Peeta looks gay as fuck

3v3rlark Follow

ik peeniss has been flagging w the rehearsed speeches but did anyone else see the way they looked at each other in the censored district 11 speech

rues-song

you’re STUPID she’s a capital pawn AND i fucked your mom while you were busy looking for illegal streams

senecacraneofficial Follow

rip seneca you were so babygirl </3

plutarchbaby69

so now you think we can’t fuck old men?

#this fandom is so ageist #this is prob what I get for blogging about thg tbh since # it’s literally about kids. Some of you ppl need to grow up

[borathae]

“You and your friends celebrate girl’s night at the penthouse. This however, isn’t an excuse for Jungkook not to receive his welcome home kisses. You won’t complain, he’s your cutie after all.”

Pairing: CEO!Jungkook x f.Reader

Genre: married life!AU, Slice of Life Fluff, casual BDSM

Warnings: just girlies being best friends <3, they talk very freely about kink, she shows off her playroom, mentions of sex work & BDSM events, mommy kink, Kookie being her cute Bunnybaby <3

Wordcount: 2.5k

a/n: i reread the caravan chapter of aaol and in it, Koo mentions that she can bring her girl friends over for girl's night whenever she wants to. so i wrote something about that feat. Koo being a cutie. have fun besties 🤎

You had your girls over tonight. It has been ages since you last saw them and it couldn’t be any more exciting to have them stay at your place. You call it your Paradis Girls’ Sleepover. Hyejin brings the snacks, Byulyi the drinks, Yongsun is responsible for the face masks and Wheein brings candles. You offer them your guestrooms to sleep in, comfy pajamas to wear and fluffy socks to show off. 

The sleepover started at four. Hyejin and Wheein were the first to arrive. Like always. Yongsun was next and Byulyi came last. You all greeted each other with happy squeals and tight hugs, falling into excited conversation instantly. Your voices overlapped, everyone had something to tell and unsurprisingly, nobody was heard. You giggled about it and then agreed on taking turns telling your stories.��

Yongsun and her now-fiancé are currently trying for a baby and are moving apartments. She stopped working at Paradis four months ago. You knew of the last fact of course because you and the others were her emotional support cheerleader in the group chat during the process. She doesn’t miss the work and says that sex with her partner feels so much better all of a sudden. 

“That’s what I’m always saying. Sex hits so good when you’re only doing it with your love”, you say, snacking on some salted pretzels.

“Yeah I agree, it hits hard. You’re especially lucky though. Kook’s kinky as fuck”, Yongsun says as she sips on her makgeolli.

“Is Shiwon vanilla?” Wheein asks, “that’s news to me.”

“Oh hell no, not vanilla. Just not as kinky as Kook. You guys have a playroom. That’s so hot.”

“Oh, yes right!” you exclaim, clapping into your hands, “Yongsun, do you still wanna tell us more? Because I just remembered that we redid the toy shelves and you didn’t even see them yet.”

“Okay slay. Please show us”, Hyejin says, “unless you still want to talk, Yongsun. We don’t wanna cut your time short.”

“No, I can still talk during the house tour. I need to see the new shelves.” 

“Slay. Let’s do that”, Hyejin says and gets up from the couch.

You and the other girls follow. 

“Did you realise that you’ve started saying slay all the time?” Byulyi asks.

“Yes god so annoying”, Hyejin groans, “I’m watching this streamer and she keeps saying slay all the time. I can’t stop doing it because of her. Last night, I literally told one of my customers slay after we finished”, she whines, making your little group chuckle. 

“Did he say something?”

“Yeah, he asked me what it meant and I had to explain to him. He said that he didn’t get it and then left. Weirdo, it’s not like he wanted to lick cheese sauce outta my belly button before that.”

Wheein cracks up, you and the others laugh as well. You can clearly imagine how weird that customer was. You had so many of those during your time at Paradis.

You chat about the streamer on the way to the playroom. Hyejin tells you that she really likes her streams and that she always watches them in the evening during dinner and her night routine. She then proceeded to gush about this new rice water moisturiser she is trying, which in return made Byulyi think of how she got a new favourite brand of rice. Conversation shifted to Byulyi and her favourite brand of rice and how she thought of so many recipes already. Wheein asked for them and Byulyi gladly shared them. 

You keep the door to the playroom open, turning on the lights.

Your girls gasp and coo in unison, looking around the playroom with sparkling eyes.

“This won’t ever lose its spark”, Yongsun gushes, “it’s so hot. Seriously I’m getting all wet just being here.”

“Totally understand you”, Wheein agrees. 

“Wait till you see the upgraded toy drawers. That’ll make your clits throb”, you tell them, leading them to the drawers with a happy skip in your steps. 

The ladies follow you happily, looking left and right to really take in everything.

“Is that swing new?”Hyejin asks.

“Mhm? That?” you look at the black leather sex swing, “I think you girls haven’t seen it yet, but we’ve had it for like seven months.”

“Slay. Did you use it already?”

“What do you think?” you say and grin mischievously.

“Huge slay.”

Byulyi laughs because of Hyejin, patting her back sisterly. 

“It’s sturdy. Also it gives me a good grip on Kook. I can really go to town on him when he’s in there”, you say.

“I can imagine”, Yongsun says, “pegging in a swing just hits so much harder”

“Yeah definitely”, Wheein agrees.

You nod your head and turn to the drawers, “now look at those drawers.”

You and your girls gather in front of them as you open them and reveal your vibrator collection to them. 

“Woow so cool”, they gasp. 

“Right? Right? Check out the lighting in there. Helloo? We have drawer lights”, you gush, waving your hands around in the drawer.

“That’s genuinely so fucking cool. And the pillowing too. It makes the toys look so expensive”, Byulyi gushes, poking her finger into the velvety pillowing.

“And now check this out”, you say, pushing the drawer closed. It slides closed carefully, slowing down on the last few inches before closing silently, “they have a fucking automatic break in them. Remember the stupid ass drawers in Room 14?”

“They are still getting stuck each time you close them. Trust me, I’m still struggling”, Wheein says.

“I know right. God”, you groan and open the drawer again just to show off its closing mechanism to them, “look at how smooth that is.”

“This is so cool, seriously. Now stop closing the damn drawers I wanna see the collection”, Byulyi says, making you laugh.

“Okay, okay fine. A girl can’t do anything here”, you joke.

Byulyi chuckles deeply, looking into the drawer with a lopsided smirk on her lips.

And so you show them your new toys and give them a few details about how it is to play with them. You show them your pegging dildo collection and Wheein asks about Jungkook’s progress, which you proudly show them. They react in coos and honest praise and you felt so proud of your husband. There is no better feeling in the world than being able to show off with him.

And there are also no better people to do it to than your friends. You share everything about your sex lives. No topic, kink or fetish is taboo. Conversations about them are normal to you and them and part of the bond you share. You honestly think that if you suddenly stopped being so open with each other, the friendship would feel weird. Sex was what brought you five together, it is what you first bonded over as you had to talk shit about weird customers and even now, when two of your little group stopped working at the club, sex will still be a topic keeping you together. After all, there are many kink events where the five of you and your partners go to together. The shared love for kink and fetish is just part of your identities and a big reason why you loved to be friends.

It is obvious how normal kink conversations are in your friendship, when in the middle of you showing off the sturdiness of your flogging post, Byulyi begins talking about her rice again and you all exchange recipes. 

By the time the clock showed eight, Jungkook comes home from work. You and your girls were back in the living room again, but still haven’t started the movie you actually wanted to watch. Conversation was just too good to interrupt it with movies.

Jungkook is a welcome interruption however. You look at the elevator until its doors open and reveal Jungkook in his business attire.

“Hey there!”

“Yuhuu!”

“Welcome home, Kook!” 

“Helloo!”

Your girls greet your husband happily, giving him enthusiastic waves.

His eyes light up instantly.

“Hey there, girls”, he greets them, stepping out of the elevator, “hey, my love”. he tells you.

“Hey, Bunny. How was work?”

“Okay. I’ll just quickly take off my outside clothes and then I’ll be with you, okay?”

“Okay.”

Jungkook disappears in the dressing room for a moment. 

“He worked later today, didn’t he?”

“No, he went for dinner with a friend. I told him to take his time. I’m surprised he’s home already.”

Jungkook reappears again, making his way to you. He looks so handsome in his grey suit that you can’t stop making heart eyes at him.

“___ says that you went for dinner with a friend?” Wheein asks him.

“Yeah, Tae. We had pork ribs. It was so yummy and I ate way too much. My pants are uncomfy now”, he says, tugging on the hem of them to give his tummy a well-deserved break, “I had to drive home with my pants undone”, he says and makes you laugh.

“I understand you so well”, Wheein says, “it’s kinda nice too though. I like being so full with food ‘cause it means that the food was yummy.”

“Yeah definitely.”

“So why are you home already?” Hyejin asks. 

“Actually, funny story. Tae had to hurry home because his daughter suddenly got explosive diarrhea and his wife begged him to help her with it.”

“Eew really?”

“Yeah”, Jungkook laughs, “apparently it went all over the walls?”

“Eeew that’s so nasty eeww”, Hyejin says jokingly, “you sure you wanna get knocked up, unnie?” she teases Yongsun. 

“Haha, very funny.”

“You and Shiwon are trying for a baby?” Jungkook asks.

“Yup, at least we’re trying for one. I can’t say that I’m hating the process.” 

Jungkook laughs, “I can imagine.”

He finally reaches the couch, scanning his eyes over the snacks and drinks.

“Don’t look at the drinks”, Byulyi says, covering the glasses of makgeolli with her hands. 

Jungkook chuckles, “it’s fine. I don’t mind looking at alcohol. You girls enjoy”, he says and closes in on you.

He gets on your lap and hugs you, nuzzling his face into the crook of your neck. You hug him back instantly, smiling dreamily.

“Hey, Mommy”, he says. 

“Hey there, Bunny.”

“How was your day?” 

“Good. And yours?”

“Okay. I had too many meetings”, he huffs out air, “so annoying.”

“Gosh, I’m sorry Bunnybaby. But you did it, I’m proud of you.”

“Thank you, Mommy”, he giggles happily, “I thought of you during the meetings.”

“You did?”

He nods his head and lifts it so he gazes into your eyes.

“I also have to fly to Shanghai for two nights. I gotta meet with a few business partners”, he says and pouts.

“When are you leaving?”

“Wednesday. I should be home by Friday night again”, he sacks his shoulders, “I’m sorry. I know this is really last-minute, but I only learned about it today.”

“It’s okay, you didn’t know”, you assure him and squeeze his dainty waist, “gosh Bunny, I’ll miss you so much. Like damn.”

“I know. Me too, Mommy”, he whines and hugs you tightly, “we gotta call each night.”

“Of course we gotta”, you say, making him giggle and lift his head so he could look at you again.

He caresses the sides of your neck, scrunching his nose cutely.

“You’re so pretty, Mommy."

“Mhm, Bunny you’re so cute. Come closer and let Mommy have her kisses.”

Jungkook leans in gladly, kissing you deeply and with his hips squirming on your lap unapologetically. You and he only act this way in front of your girls. No one else in your lives, not even family, knows this side of you. There would simply be too many awkward follow up questions and quite frankly, it was more comfortable to keep this part of your relationship private. But not in front of your girls. They know you for who you truly are. Jungkook was shy about it at first, because he never experienced sharing his kinks with people before. But once he realised that he won’t find judgment with your friends – and he visited enough kink events with you and your friends to know they are just as kinky as you – he began opening up more and more. These days, he is not ashamed of acting like Mommy’s best Bunny in front of them and he is most definitely not ashamed to show how much he likes your kisses. Everyone should know that he is Mommy’s happy Bunny when he gets your kisses.

You break the kiss because you didn’t want it to deepen too much. Jungkook will get horny again and you can’t be with him for at least a few more hours. 

He smiles at you, licking his lips afterwards. You retort the smile, squeezing his hips.

“That was nice”, he says.

“Yeah, it was so nice.”

“I think I’ll go to my room then. I bet you girls have so much to talk about”, he says, looking at the others.

“It’s okay. We don’t mind the distraction”, Byulyi assures him.

“We saw the size you can take these days. That’s impressive”, Wheein adds.

Jungkook’s face is beet red in an instant. He gawks at you with big eyes.

“You showed them?”

“Of course I did. I gotta show off with my Bunny.”

Jungkook blushes even harder, hiding his face in his own hands as cute giggles leave him.

“Mommy, you’re so mean. Don’t show off with that”, he whines, making you and your girls chuckle fondly.

“Mhm no. I’ll keep showing off with my Bunny.”

“God”, he falls against you, hugging you tightly as he giggles, “this is so embarrassing. You’re so mean, Mommy.”

“Sorry Bunny. You know that I’m proud of you, yeah?” you say, patting his butt gently.

“Yeah, I guess. Hmpf so mean”, he says and straightens up. You give him a little smooch on his cheek and then it is already time for Jungkook to get up from your lap. 

He looks at the snacks.

“Mhm snackies. Don’t mind me stealing some”, he says and grabs a handful of salted pretzels. He snacks on them as he leaves the living room, chewing happily, “will you girls stay the night?”

“Yup, we wanna watch a movie later.”

“Uuh movie. Which one?”

“Hereditary.”

“Isn’t that the movie with the car scene?”

“Yeah.”

Jungkook cringes, “well good luck to you girls. ___ showed me the scene and I’m still traumatized”, he says, making your little group laugh.

“Thanks Kook.” 

“I’ll be in the gym if you need me. I gotta work off the calories I ate. Mhm those are good pretzels. Damn”, he says and officially disappears out of sight. 

You release a dreamy sigh.

“He’s so perfect, you guys. I’m so lucky”, you gush. 

“Wah she’s so in love”, Hyejin teases lovingly, making you chuckle.

“I am. It’s getting stronger each day”, you say proudly, sighing adoringly.

[astonmartinii]

Hi, love your work. Could you please write a Lando Norris x engineer!reader thank you 🥰

team bonding | lando norris social media au

pairing: lando norris x engineer!reader

people start to notice the chemistry between lando and his race engineer

yourusername

liked by landonorris, danielricciardo and 11,067 others

tagged: yourbff

yourusername: life between races ✨

view all comments

lilaclando part time race enginner full time mother

landonorris so where was my karaoke invite?

yourusername you'd really come all the way from monaco to do karaoke with my uni friends ???

landonorris duh

mclarenlover he's so in love you can't tell me otherwise

oscarpiastri the real question is what song did you sing?

yourusername man i feel like a women obviously

oscarpiastri taste as always

landonorris

liked by yourusername, estebanocon and 601,843 others

landonorris: what happens at the monaco after party stays at the monaco after party

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babynorris i did not know lando was friends with mick and este but i am living for this

estebanocon the best nights are the ones you don't remember

mickschumacher where is dj lando?

lando4ever are we all just collectively ignoring the girl in the last slide?

leclerc16x call me delusional but that looks like his race engineer

landonorizzzzz ur delusional (i hope you're right)

f1wagsupdates

liked by lando4ever, lilacleclerc and 1,304 others

tagged: yourusername

f1wagsupdates: in his most recent post lando norris included a picture of a girl many believe to be his race engineer y/n y/ln. she's worked with lando for just over a year and are a beloved duo in f1, with their radio conversations being a huge source of entertainment. what do you think of this potential couple: cute or unprofessional?

view all comments

babygirllando i think it would be cute... i mean we've all heard the radios... the one when lando crashed... she was so stressed

maxyverstappen i mean that's kinda her job?

kittyrussell as much as i would love this couple, they work together like HR violation ???

norrisszn maybe the issue here is y'all assuming everything all the time ? they're clearly friends? i didn't know you couldn't party with your friends

LN4 literally people assume shit every time and cause the issues

f1

liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 421,077 others

tagged: landonorris

f1: lando norris is back on the podium in austria after some quick thinking from his race engineer y/n y/ln helped the brit undercut the alpines to take third!

view all comments

landonorris your fave duo tearing it up

yourusername we slayed 💅

glitterlando I DON'T CARE WHAT THAT RAT STEINER SAYS THEY’RE CUTE AND PROFESSIONAL

planetdannyric this is what you get steiner - double haas dnf and y/n being a big component of lando's podium KARMA

danielricciardo team work makes the dream work !! happy for you two 🏆

hugsforlando danny being a landoy/n shipper so true of him

landonorris

liked by danielricciardo, yourusername and 531,778 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: after the last couple weeks, y/n has been subject to the most ridiculous and disgusting ridicule from people from within our own sport. y/n y/ln is one of the most talented individuals in f1 and i am forever grateful that she is on my team! i think we all saw how important she is to my success, so appreciation post for my rock! x

view all comments

howdyricciardo god they are so cute whether they're a couple or just friends

yourusername awwww thank you lando i don't care what they say we continue to slay

landonorris lets fucking go

flowersforlando i need this couple to happen fuck steiner

smoooooothoperator no cause power couple for real

yourusername

liked by landonorris, charles_leclerc and 49,671 others

yourusername: don't let any man tell you that you can't do it

p.s. slagging off your drivers in your book and on national television is more unprofessional than anything i could ever do

view all comments

mickschumacher ❤️

danielricciardo as the children say - mother

landonorris forever proud of you y/n

yourusername thank you landinho

maxverstappen1 let's gooooooooo

carlossainz55 tell them !!

landonorris

liked by carlossainz55, alexalbon and 772,109 others

tagged: yourusername

landonorris: what if i told you i don't care, our team chemistry is unmatched

view all comments

yourusername not exactly how i thought we were going to do this but i love you silly ❤️

landonorris i love you more

danielricciardo so it is true !!! was about to ask you if you finally grew some balls and asked

landonorris dude don't out me on main

lewishamilton so so happy for you guys !!

yoursricciardo omg parents

lovelylando they make me believe in love for real

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, maxverstappen1 and 71,209 others

tagged: landonorris

yourusername: i'd take all the shit in the world to stay with you ❤️

p.s. let's get that win baby

view all comments

violetleclerc i will be seated for lando's maiden win and y/n excellence

landonorris i love you so much (and the win is coming, i can feel it)

yourusername you'll get what you deserve in due time

maxverstappen1 does the camera man not get a shout out?

yourusername thank you for being our personal photographer, not my fault you tackle my phone out of my hands whenever i try to take a pic of you :/

note: hope you enjoyed, i'm finally getting through the requests !! xx

[dkmbookworm]

Odysseus’s Mistake w/ Open Arms

After listening to a podcast featuring Jorge Rivera-Herrans. I am so fascinated by his explanation for why Odysseus revealed his name in his version of the story.

Obviously one of the elements at play is the fact he just witnessed the death of a friend so there’s a lot of rage and pain involved for why he wants to taunt the cyclops as they leave. And we all know that hubris was the other factor especially when he dips down into lines like “I am neither man nor mythical”. And Jay further went into this point by saying

“Odysseus in this moment is riding this high of thinking ‘I am so smart, that I don’t have to depend on brutality to solve my problems. I am so clever that I alone can carry along this philosophy of Open Arms because I can always find a different solution’”

That is such a fascinating display of his hubris while simultaneously trying to hold onto the memory of a dead friend. It shows just how flawed this interpretation of it at that moment, and how that carried forward for him. Because Odysseus was just introduced to this philosophy, one that he could have used to go forward. But the literal representation of it is killed in front of him so all he has to go off of are these vague concepts on top of his own problems muddying the waters

The biggest example of this to me, is how he approaches speaking with Eurylochus. Open arms or mercy, is not something that can only exist in terms of not slaying your enemy. It requires a lot of emotional intelligence that Ody does not really have. When eurylochus questions him on his plan with Aeolus, his fears and concerns are not being addressed. Sure yes, bad idea to do this in front of the crew and sow seeds of doubt in them. But if ody is going to dedicate himself to this ideology he has to go the full way and learn to communicate with people.

When Polites reached out to ody, he recognized that he felt troubled. That he was carrying s lot of guilt and was trying to ease his mind. Odysseus felt heard and understood, and he was willing to listen to his friend. By comparison he does none of this with eurylochus. He shuts him down and tells him to be devout. All that he’s accomplished is to shut him up and keep things to himself, which only makes things worse and leaves his doubt to fester

It represents such a tragic element in this story because Odysseus is trying to fulfill this wish from his friend while having a broken version of it he never got to fully learn or understand. That Polites could have potentially helped him make the journey into leading a kinder life. But the consequences of his actions came knocking on his door and it became this nonstop effort of drilling ruthlessness into his head as the only option of survival.

The podcast in question if any of you would like to check it out

[pookietv]

encore! | arthur hill

literally got this ask like a couple hours but i had ideas for it so figured the dedication to the grind was worth it :)

been so long since i've written a smau, so i hope you enjoy! i may be slightly rusty

liked by yourinstagram, arthurtv and 7,389 others

arthurnfhill: the kill hill tour has started better than i could have ever asked for :)

georgeclarkeey: who is that sexy man on stage??

↳ arthurnfhill: can't wait for you to be my sexy groupie at the london show

username3: KILL HILL IS GONNA BE SO GOOD!!!!

username4: can't wait for manchester omg

liked by shannonlangdon, arthurnfhill and 6,093 more

yourusername: soooo what if i said i was impulsively dropping a song tomorrow night because i need to get the song off my chest and i can't wait until the supposed release date of next month ...?

it's called francis forever, and it's brought me a lot of peace to throw myself into completely making this song over the past few weeks

ANYWAYS here's a presave link if you care about that sort of thing,

hope you enjoy!

love, y/n.

jamesmarriott: we're getting SPOILED with another y/n banger

↳ yourusername: how do you know banger you haven't even heard yet ??? hmmm???

↳ jamesmarriott: you only drop bangers and thats FACTUAL

taliamar: UGH you are my icon

↳ yourusername: thats funny cause you're mine ???

username5: my heart is BREAKING at the caption

username6: omg if this is a breakup song i will do something violent.

liked by chrismd, georgeclarkeey and 7383 others

arthurnfhill: i can't believe there is only four more shows of the kill hill tour - feels like i was waiting forever for the tour to come around and now its almost done just like that!

chrismd: london show night one and two rolling around real quick

↳ arthurnfhill: missed me in the flat?

↳ chrismd: all you did before you left was mope around so not much change

arthurtv: my goat

↳ arthurnfhill: can't wait to see the number one most popular arthur on famous birthdays in person again

username7: CAN'T WAIT FOR LONDON SHOWS

username8: manchester was AMAZING omg

liked by arthurnfhill, georgeclarkeey and 5739 others

yourusername: as requested - my one night only london show! it was amazing to see so many of you guys there, makes this whole music thing so much more surreal :,)

username9: girl are you just gonna ignore the fact that ARTHUR AND GEORGE WERE THERE ???

��� username10: for REAL my delusional y/nthur ass is going into OVERDRIVE

arthurnfhill: was a great night, glad i got to catch the show :)

↳ username11: oh you guys are TWISTED dropping comments like this

↳ username12: literally still in love i am not hearing any different.

bambinobecky: can i be ur biggest fan?

↳ yourusername: anyday sexy ;)

username13: the fact she scheduled it just a couple days before his london dates so arthur could make it ..... coincidence ???

liked by arthurtv, yourusername and 6290 others

mummysboypod: Mum, did you miss me on tour?

The NEW episode of Mummy's Boy is now live - with Arthur and Lisa discussing Arthur's life on tour, from crazed fans to drunken nights!

Link in bio!

liked by yourusername, arthurtv and 6380 others

arthurnfhill: i still cannot believe kill hill is over!! i will miss seeing all of you lovely people and playing you my silly songs

arthurtv: what does slay mean and why do women keep shouting it at you?

↳ arthurnfhill: because i ATE arthur

↳ arthurtv: you ate me?

username14: TOUR WAS SO INCREDIBLE!!!

username15: y/n being in the crowd was NOT. a coincidence

username16: is y/nthur back????

username17: you seemed SO much happier towards end of tour

username18: DUBLIN MISSES YOU ALREADY !!!

liked by georgeclarkeey, arthurnfhill and 9374 others

yourusername: in musical terms... you could call this an encore?

username19: IMAGINE REANNOUNCING Y/NTHUR IN THE MOST ICONIC WAY POSSIBLE.

georgeclarkeey: i think everyone clocked when you were love heart eyeing him the whole concert

↳ yourusername: well you also did that and no one has realised yet?

↳ georgeclarkeey: it's MY bed he comes back to sweetie

lisahull_hill: you both have the sweetest smiles

↳ yourusername: LISA I MISSED YOU SO MUCH

↳ arthurnfhill: yourusername i believe you said 'more than i missed you by a long shot' ??

[starryknight-tarot]

𝓦𝓱𝓪𝓽'𝓼 𝔂𝓸𝓾𝓻 𝓭𝓮𝓼𝓽𝓲𝓷𝔂?

pile 1 -- > pile 2

pile 3 -- > pile 4

my masterlist<3 . paid readings

Hello beautiful souls✨ we are back in the building with another tarot reading. Today we will be looking into your destiny, a general idea of what your purpose is on this beautiful planet. Remember to meditate, take a deep breath and pick whatever pile calls to you the most. Since this is a general reading, make sure to take what resonates and leave what doesn't. Art by @pop_KOME on Twitter (or X lol).

Pile 1:

Cards: Knight of Swords rx, Queen of Wands, The Chariot, Six of Wands, King of Cups, Eight of Cups, Five of Wands, Justice

Back of the Deck: Nine of Swords

Pile 1, your destiny is to be a leader. I feel a strong spiritual presence for this pile, I feel like you are very strongly protected by your spirit team, you may even have some powerful archangels in your spirit team. Also hearing some of yall may be an Aquarius and have heavy water energy in your birth chart. You are someone who has watched the people in your life be mistreated and conditioned to just suffer through traumatic experiences. But instead of following in the same path of suffering, you take action. Your destiny is to help the people around cope with life and make life feel a little easier. Some of you can do this just by being your true authentic self which encouraging others to do the same. Some of you are destine to be therapists, judges, lawyers, maybe even politicians. If any of you play Honkai Star Rail, you are giving major Natasha vibes. You are destined to run organisations that could literally save lives or make life a lot easier for people. I am also hearing some of yall could create something that would become really popular and almost in a way save people. Like, have you ever had a show or song or form of art that has shaped your life, taught you a lesson, or helped you from a really hard experience. Your destiny is to be that for people or create something that has that effect on people. I am seeing specifically Studio Ghibli so that could have an impact on you, or inspired you to create something. For some of you, your destiny is to be parent, but more specifically to help raise someone the right way(?). Kinda going along with what I was saying before, you may have had a really unhealthy home environment growing up and when it's your turn to be a parent, you will make it your mission to make sure your child doesn't have to go through what you went through, in a healthy way, of course if you don't want to be a parent then this doesn't apply. I just heard, "It's your job to call out the bullcrap." It's your purpose to stand up and say no when others won't or are too scared. You have a lot of influence on people Pile 1, and your purpose is to use it to help the people around you.

Advice Cards:

Align body, mind and spirit. Know that you are whole

Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you

Hold a positive outlook. You will see it when you believe it

To effect a change, you must be willing

Get clear about what you want

It is time to unclutter your body, mind, and spirit

Channeled Songs:

Pile 2

Cards: The Emperor rx, Eight of Wands, The Hanged Man rx, King of Swords, Queen of Wands, Four of Wands rx, Page of Cups, The Sun

Back of the Deck: The Devil

Your destiny is to be a shining light in the darkness. The small ounce of hope when everything seems to be lost. Now that is a big role Pile 2. I heard just now, "Your duty is to spread warmth." and "All you gotta do is slay all day." LMAO. You may currently or in the past have felt like everything is hopeless and you may have repeated very negative affirmations. I feel like it's a part of your purpose to learn about how powerful words are and use it to your advantage. When you finally start to use your words in a way that shows hope and positivity, is when you will fully align with your higher self and see all the beautiful things that life truly has to offer. This pile reminds me of another reading I did, it was Pile 4 of my what makes you so attractive reading so if you picked that pile, this pile is definitely for you. If you are interested and haven't read that reading then I would highly recommend it. I feel like your destiny to spread kindness. I am seeing a scenario where you are working somewhere and someone was having a bad day, but after talking with you for a short while, they are in a really good mood and feel amazing. I feel like your use of words and how you express yourself freely is your purpose. I feel like this pile is the most likely to be famous, I am seeing specifically a streamer. I feel like you are just someone that people could listen to talk for hours and it just feels so calming and relaxing. I am kinda picking up on when Among Us was really popular and there was a handful of streamers that were just majorly comforting for people, especially since that was when COVID was really bad. If you did follow thoses streamers, you may know Sykkuno, and I am saying this because I feel like you have a very similar life purpose as Sykkuno or you are just very similar to him. I heard you are like a safe place for people. I feel like your purpose is to make a domino effect for love and kindness. Like when you smile at someone, they smile, and then they make someone else smile and it just spreads. Some of yall may be into yoga or maybe even wanna be yoga instructors. You could also be a masseuse. Your destiny is to be a comforting presence and to show people another way to look a life. (I feel like this pile is very different from Pile 1, however there are some messages from Pile 1 that I strongly feel that may apply to you so if you did feel called to Pile 1 as well, please do read it)

Advice Cards:

Remain faithful to your ideal and find trust within yourself

Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide you

Remove all resistances and move into a state of flow

It is time to challenge old beliefs

You can manifest your heart's desire

To effect a change, you must be willing

Channeled Songs:

Pile 3

Cards: Two of Pentacles rx, Knight of Pentacles, Strength rx, The Lovers, Page of Swords, Nine of Cups, Temperance, Three of Cups

Back of the Deck: Nine of Wands

There is some crazy beautiful messages for this pile. Your destiny is to see your dreams become a reality. I am getting that you are someone who has worked very hard for everything you have, I am hearing started from the bottom now we're here lol. Pile 3, all the hard work and love you have put into you goals and dreams are destined to shine brightly. You will be able eat the fruits of your labor. Honestly Pile 3, I just see good things coming towards you and it is so wholesome. I feel like there has been a lot of times where you've just wanted to give up and take the easy route of life, giving into words that say you will never achieve anything you strive to. But it is literally your destiny to succeed. Spirit is saying that all the times that have been rough and cruel have been so that when you finally get to relax and see your hard work flourish, it will feel even more rewarding. I feel like things you never thought would be possible for you will come true. Finding true love, a soul family that you can always rely on. I heard multiple people will fall in love you. Pile 3, its your destiny to go on a journey of self love, this journey may be a spiritual awakening for you, by connecting with spiritual, it can help you realize your true potential. I feel like all this love and success will take a while for you though, especially if you tend to put yourself down and don't acknowledge the work you need to do. I feel like some of you are really passionate about your dreams but fail to really push yourself and challenge yourself because of your insecurities. Don't try to be humble Pile 3, you are amazing and the world wants to see you shine! If you are procrastinating about the things you want to bring into your life and putting yourself down when you make mistakes, these blessings will delay and if it gets really bad, may never come. Mistakes are extremely human and we are meant to make mistakes to learn from them and improve even more. Believe in the power of your mind and creativity and the universe, and that's when blessings will manifest. Spirit wants you to enjoy life to the fullest and enjoy the things life has to offer.

Advice Cards:

Remain faithful to your ideal and find trust within yourself

Your spirit wings are unfolding. It is time to take flight!

Practice the pause

Keep the faith. Stay intentioned. Your perseverance will pay off

You are moving beyond your old form. Congratulations!

Relax and feel good. You deserve more joy!

Control is an illusion. Surrender and allow the Universe to guide

Channeled Songs:

Pile 4

Cards: Seven of Pentacles, Queen of Swords, King of Swords, Four of Swords rx, Four of Wands, Seven of Cups, Six of Wands, Page of Cups

Back of the Deck: Ace of Swords

You have some fun energy Pile 4. It is your destiny to enjoy the ride of life. To let life take the wheel and chill in the fast lane. This pile got so much swords cards, so yall could be an air sign, Gemini, Libra, Aquarius, or have a very air heavy birth chart. With the swords cards I am getting that it's your destiny to be free. You may currently feel tied down by people and burdens that just feel so heavy and tiring. But it is your destiny to escape from the shackles of these things and have fun. You are supposed to enjoy the things you have missed out on for so long. I feel like you have felt held back by societies expectations of you and changed yourself to fit in. But the universe wants you to express yourself and show us who you really are. It will feel amazing when you do. People are always going to have problems with you being yourself because your confidence makes them feel intimidated in their own lack of self expression. They are all just jealous of you, so don't let them hold you back from enjoying the things you are passionate about and from feeling the wind on your skin. For some of you, it's your destiny to be a cool parent or like aunt or uncle. I feel like you will have a strong influence on the people close to you, you will be like a role model for the younger people around you. It's because you show them how beautiful freedom and just expressing yourself without worrying about what others think of can be. I also feel like you will meet someone that is your divine counterpart. Someone that understands you better than anyone else will. This could be romantic but it doesn't have to be. This connection will be something everyone will be envious of. This person is someone you know you will grow old with. Your destiny is to enjoy with a smile on your face.

Advice Cards:

Expect good things to come to you

It's time to try something new!

It is important to ask for help

To effect a change, you must be willing

It is time to challenge old beliefs

Act on what you know

You are divinely protected. Remind yourself how safe you are

Channeled Songs:

Thanks for tuning in₊‧.°.⋆🫧•˚₊‧⋆.

[bitkahuna]

As Bilbo's magic trickled into the earth, his understanding deepened. The ground beneath his fingers seemed to pulse with life. There was substance and activity. He could match particular pulses to particular trees and he attuned to it. Each tree had its own voice, rumbling through its own roots to reach out to the others. Soon, the thrumming grew stronger and more insistent, like thunder under ground. It was as if the very earth was trying to communicate with him. To reach out just as he reached in. Their hands could almost connect. The closed door that kept back those muffled voices was beginning to creak open. With every inch, he felt as if his mind was being peeled back. Layers of himself opened and a coldness seeped into his skull, as if his very brain were being exposed to the elements.

But when his mind was still, some strange movement came to him.

He was swaying.

It wasn’t words that he heard, but an exchange of feelings. A language only in abstractions.

Confusion, what is this creature? Reason, it is small. Hope, it could see the darkness and had the light to navigate. Doubt, there is a fire within it that is far older than itself.

Confusion, it reeks of dwarf. Reason, this is not a dwarf. Hope, it reeks of Her. Doubt, it reeks of dragonsblood and fire rain.

Confusion, this species is unfamiliar. Reason, this is not a dragon nor a dwarf. Hope, it is something that follows Her path. Doubt, there is risk we cannot afford.

“My name is Bilbo Baggins.”

The swaying of the trees faltered. But he did not.

“I am neither dwarf nor dragon, but I live amongst dwarves and slayed the dragon of this mountain. I am a hobbit.”

Confusion, hobbits are unfamiliar. Reason, it is clearly not a threat. Hope, it is a good Thing who walks Her path. Doubt, it speaks to us as though it hears us.

-----

I've been waiting over six literal months to post this spesific chapter

[base0h]

Hello,

Heard you’re looking for ideas so…

Here’s a crack one: The Straw hats working in a department store

Would they become employee of the month? Would they be fired immediately?

a/n - IM WHEEZING AT THIS— you are GENIUS bro holy crap 😭🫶 dude luffy would get fired so fast it’s insane— and imma just add everyone bc why not 😂

Warnings ⚠️ - MAJOR crack, multiple characters, I’m kinda dumb and might’ve forgotten people

they didn’t even make it past the interview 💀

.✩ kidd (tried killing the interviewer for asking him why he wanted to work there “I really am passionate about restocking— MF IM BROKE.”), buggy, bonney, paulie (did the same thing as kidd plus he parked in the manager’s parking spot)

literally within the first few seconds of the interview they’re hired | “My name is—“ “Can you start within the next few seconds?”

.✩ jimbei, koby, sabo, koala, izou, kaku, vivi

got fired the same day they started

.✩ luffy (ate the entire produce section and then asked the manager “is there more stuff in the back?”), corazon (he accidentally burnt the place down 😀), sanji (confessed his love and asked several female customers to marry him at his cash register), brook (asked for some poor random woman’s underwear 💀)

employee of the month every single month

.✩ jimbei, koby (old people always say how sweet he is to the manager bc he always helps them get the things they can’t reach 😭🫶), tashigi (kids hate her bc she catches them and scolds them if they take an extra candy/sticker from the cashier jar), vivi (accidentally gave herself this title when she’s the manager 💀)

the manager of the store

.✩ nami (steals money from the safe sometimes), aokiji (he literally never shows up to work on time and doesn’t give a shit what the employees do), akainu, fujitora, shanks (bro also does not care and comes to work hungover), dragon (has not shown up once since the interview), sengoku, garp, dadan, vivi, magellan

the sale sign flipper guy

.✩ zoro (if he manages to actually find his way to the store), bepo, ace, shachi, penguin, queen (you legit can’t miss him as you’re driving by 💀), yamato, oden, cat viper, bon clay, ivankov

they work solely in the back to avoid human interaction as much as possible

.✩ mihawk, law, smoker (he’s the guy that mans the big crane machine that moves huge boxes), hawkins, king, katakuri, smoker, lucci

they’re the CEOs of companies that are partners with the store and provide goods for the store to sell

.✩ crocodile (provides gut/immune supporting, healthy, all organic animal/pet food), doflamingo, kaido, big mom, whitebeard, moria (sells and produces copious amounts of Halloween costumes and other decorations)

actually decent employees

.✩ usopp, benn, x drake, robin, nojiko, baby 5, monet, vergo, franky, icebarg, bellamy (SHADOW FROM SK8 PLS TELL ME YALL SEE IT), hachi, killer

they start tweaking because they asked a customer how they were and they ignored them

.✩ shirahoshi (sobbing), bepo, sanji (asked a girl who had her headphones on), Uta (will get so pressed that they ignored her when in reality they just had headphones on)

they’re the reason why the store’s still in business | they’re basically the mascot

.✩ chopper, bepo, carrot, cat viper, dog storm

the dude everyone goes to for questions/help | “Idk go ask ___”

.✩ franky (has beef with cash register 4 bc it stops working for no reason only during his lunch break and never when he’s not doing anything), icebarg, kaku, usopp, lucci, jack, king, robin, jimbei

they’re the reason why no one likes to shop there | they have several weird allegations or felonies of some sort

.✩ trebol, caesar, diamante, dellinger, pica (he drives this mini car and always somehow fits inside it and takes up two spots in the parking lot), absalom, hogback (people have gone missing in the parking lot it’s scary), moria (would you wanna shop if you saw bro? Ik I wouldn’t 😭)

jobless for life ✌️

.✩ rayleigh (he slays idc), roger, yasopp

a/n - I think i forgot people but eh 💀 the one piece brainrot is so back 🙏

[luckymousey]

Things I loved about Diasomnia Arc: Deuce and Cater’s dreams

⚠️ English is not my first language⚠️

I just finished watching their dreams and I found a lot of things funny XD

Warning(s): if you haven't seen their dreams, ⚠️SPOILERS⚠️

1. The hair of these two, like, EXCUSE ME?😂, I love you guys, but one seems to have been scammed by a hair salon and the other one will lose his hair.

2. When they introduced each dorm in Deuce’s dream, like, everyone looked crazy/high.

3. The way Octavinelle students gasped when Deuce and Ace took out the book of the 810 rules of the queen of hearts, they were like: AND IT HAS A LEATHER COVER!

4. When Sebek hit Deuce with a book saying: BOOKS ARE NOT FOR HITTING!

5. When fake!Cater appeared like the savage bitch he’s (slay✨💅🏻✨), riding his skateboard.

6. How in some scenes Idia and Leona talked together in Cater’s dream.

7. The references to Alice in Wonderland in Cater’s dream.

8. When Leona got bored so he decided to go to sleep in the middle of the trial.

9. When Deuce dragged a sleeping Leona down the floor because he needed another witness and didn’t know what to do.

10. Leona was literally SNORING 😄

11. When fake!Cater said he heard the most important piece of everything but it was just Leona sleep talking about a sandwich he wanted.

12. Deuce literally dragged his friends and seniors into helping him.

13. When Riddle ordered Silver to take off his hat, I don’t know why, but I found it hilarious.

14. While Yuu and Grim denied knowing anything and Leona simply didn’t even try, Silver started talking about his tea he drinks to wake himself up after school.

15. RIDDLE BEING THE DJ, and he did his job with such a serious face

16. When Riddle made Silver eat a scone with a lot of jam and butter on top, it was cute for some reason

17. Deuce fighting with fake!Ace over his favorite food.

18. Real!Cater appearing like nothing just because he heard Leona was in Heartslabyul

19. The fact that Cater just needed to see darkness and the memories came to him by themselves, like, it kind of made me think that, yk, he LOVES Magicam, and if we think about it, influencers probably also lie about their lives there, and even if he’s an obsessed with the app, he’s pretty realistic/self aware.

20. When he went and protected Deuce and Grim, I think he really cares about his juniors 🥺

21. When Cater calmly smiles with drooping eyes, he looks soooooooo

22. The fact that Floyd, Deuce and Cater were like: nah, my friend/brother wouldn’t say that in his life, I know you’re fake; Cater even called them gross and kindly asked them to get the hell out of his sight.

23. When Deuce started his emotional speech because he thought Cater didn’t like life in Heartslabyul and Cater went like: ey, ey, ey! Wait a fucking minute!

24. Honestly, Cater’s dream is my favorite one until now because of the many references it has from Alice in Wonderland, and Deuce’s the second favorite because I found it funny, it was literally something like a mafia but inside the school lmao

That's all ✨🎀✨

[la-rougo]

*SFW*—

Hades x Chaotic deity ! GN reader

I could make a chaotic reader series lmaoooo

Warnings: swearing

Even though the king is often busy and doesn’t really visit the upperworld unless necessary, but he sure does know a lot of dieties out there, including you

He only heard about your title like “f/n the disaster bringer” or “f/n the god/goddess of stupidity” he lowkey wanted to know who this deity is

You often run around in valhalla messing with gods and goddesses, pranking all of them and get kicked out sometimes, even Loki is afraid of going near you but ended up being your sidekick

Now that piqued the helheim ruler’s interest, how did someone even managed to do something even worse than loki?

He decided to come out to the upperworld more often to observe you from afar. He wanted to know more about you and maybe hang out around sometimes since he haven’t seek any fun in his life for a long while after all, though he have tons of work to finish

There he sees you pulling out your shenanigans stupidly, how cute. Your chaotic behavior may seem dumb and annoying to other deities but to him? He found it adorable and fascinating on how you come up with new ways of pranking deities none stop

H/c deity was found pushing Loki lightly made him dropped whatever he’s holding “jeez f/n! You’ll never ever get tired of bullying me do you, oh well. That’s what I found cute about you~” Loki said teasingly as he bent down to reach for the object only to feel a hard smack on his ass, his body jumped up highly like those goofy cartoons, yelped loudly from the impact on his butt. He turn look back at you with an angry wojak expression, his fist clenching being one centimeter close to blow your head off with a single punch

You whistles casually and ran away “this is the sixth time of this week that you abused my cheeks you stupid as—!!! *slurs*” you saw him chasing after you, running for your dear life, you tried to find a way to escape him cause you know damn well if he finally get you then he’s gonna slap your bakery back with immense amounts of strength that could send you to the oblivion

You found a tall intimidating god, you didn’t look up to see who he is or you have any clue of it, you hid behind him, sticking your tongue out at Loki. The mischievous god sighs and asked the tall god “sir, I apologize for that gremlin and for the commotion. May I have them back?” Loki smiles sarcastically. The tall god chuckles… wait, you recognize his voice “I’m afraid you’ll have you get your revenge later” oh shit. Is that… is that Hades? You thought as you lean to his side to look up and see his face while Loki floats away in defeat

You stare at him, who’s watching Loki leave, he is Hades the king of the helheim… he’s even handsome up close, suddenly his gaze switches to your eyes as he look at you with a gentle smile

“Where’s my thank you hm?” Your soul flew back to your body and you bowed deeply, head digging down the floor “uhh thank you very much mister!” You said, not looking at him. Hades was about to say something but was cut off by you fleeing away from him as fast as you can, leaving him confused and amused

You actually have been crushing on Hades for a while now, obviously you rant about him to Loki

Every time you see him greeting gods and goddesses so formally, unlike you. Makes your toxic traits says you can do that too

Well you actually tried that but failed, miserably

You often sneaked into the underworld to see your fellow friends like hypnos and definitely not Hades

He’s like your biggest crush or smth, when you saw him training or slaying any titans so majestically or his gaze lays on you, literally those night at your house would be you giggling and kicking your feet thinking about him

You often see him in events, celebrations and parties that mostly zeus being the host(of course) and you see how nice, well mannered and perfect he is

He’s like completely opposite to you which made you believe that he couldn’t be with you, he deserves an independent, formal and smart person, a person who’s as perfect as him not a goofy comedian… at least that’s what you thought

After your first direct encounter, you’re so close to explode every time the moment he made an eye contact with you again

Hades decided, soon he’ll get to know more about you and maybe got together… wait what?

You were hanging out in Valhalla again, but this time. You’re alone, sleeping while your back leaning against a tree in the garden while shifting uncomfortably

A presence seems to be approaching your slumbering form quietly, not daring to wake you up from your beauty sleep. The presence looms over your unconscious body, whoever it is, stepped beside you and laying down next to you without making any sound.

Your uncomfortable shifting was not unnoticed by the person next to you, hands slowly caress your back and sides silently, your upper body was caressed gently, being guided by the hands, which make your body turns aside. Suddenly your head lays on a soft surface, a fabric texture. One of the person’s hand now rest on your head and stroking your hair so tenderly. With the change of position and feeling something on your head, it causes your eye lids to open up slowly, expected to meet a sunlight but instead, observing the sight in front of you made you realized your current position.

You were sleeping on Hades’ lap?! While he’s stroking your hair?!?!?!

“Wha-“

“Hush, dear. Go back to your rest”

Your slightly widened eyes stare at his gentle ones, as gentle as his smile that’s being portrayed on his face

You were about to ask more questions but quickly got shut up by Hades’ lip placing against your forehead. Saying you’re shock would be an understatement. Hades’ lift his head up slightly, moving to place another kiss on your already pink dusted cheek

After calling for your soul to come back to your body, yet you still can’t move, not that you want but you’re actually that surprised. But you collect all your courages left and leans up to his face, leaning in slowly and place a peck on his cheek, the same way that he does to you, which made him surprised, but it was quickly replaced by his silly smile

He peck you back on the forehead while his hand run up to your head and pat it dearly, you feel like you can die right there, like fr

Hades lean against the tree and lift you up by your lower parts, placing you up on his lap and he guides your head to rest on his shoulder

He didn’t expect your second encounter would be this… lovely and sweet, he loves it a lot. He felt like everything that mattered his mind vanished while there’s only you in his head, he had never seen your peaceful side before and he love it, honestly he admire everything about you to the point he didn’t realized his feelings developed more and more

The two rest together under the tree in a garden peacefully, no one dares to mind them or even see them in the first place. At least one person saw and ran away to go weeping in the corner

You and Hades eventually become closer and closer together, even if the two’s personalities are as different as day and night, rumors starts to spread about Hades being your boyfriend or smth

I kid you not, when Poseidon heard about this he’s beyond disappointment. Out of all god and goddesses, you??? While zeus actually being supportive and adamas is just, shocked

Hades didn’t mind the rumors, he actually likes it since its just fun to tease you something like “we look like couples don’t you think?”

You almost leave him a scar

He’s actually starting to get serious about his feelings, does he think of you as a friend? Of course! That’s what he at least tried, cause seeing you with Loki makes him rethink his plan about confession

One day he was about to meet you in Valhalla like usual, smiling a bit. Once he’s close to your meet up place. A frown soon took over his face when he sees you and Loki together

He was about to turn away but a few words reached his ears

“What if he didn’t like me back?”

“He’s obvious as fuck!”

“Wait really?”

Hades turn back to see your nervous form looking around, probably looking for him? Hell yea!

He sneakily approach you from behind and surprise you with a little greeting

You flinched and turn around to see Hades’ face, his handsome face… you look back to Loki and giving him the “what do I do bro” face. Loki didn’t reply and slowly leaving, giving you a last thumbs up and vanished

You were about to go chase Loki but soon realized what you have to do. You nervously turn back to Hades, smiling like always, gah dayum he’s hot.

You cleared your throat and trying to recall all the practices you did with Loki, only to stand in front of him awkwardly. Hades’ calm expression turn into confusion and lean himself in to see what’s mattering you

“Are you alright?”

You startled by Hades again and trying to form a sentence

“Okay so, I’ve been crushing on this guy lately…”

Hades’ frown slightly and straightened his back. He only stood silently, he doesn’t even have to ask who it is cause it’s probably Loki, if it’s another person then, why would you tell him and not Loki?

“He’s a very cool god, I used to watch him from afar and admire him, I never thought of approaching him or talk to him because he’s Zeus’ brother. I’m scared he wouldn’t want to date an unserious deity because he’s more than a divine being”

Hades expression changed into a shocked one as he awkwardly spoke up

“Poseidon?”

You look up at him with a “bro what?” Face and facepalm. Do you really have to confess more? You thought he’s more clever than this!

“No… it’s not Poseidon!”

“Adamas?”

“…no.”

That’s obvious enough judging from Hades’ even more shocked expression. You pray he doesn’t reject you or if he does then at least doesn’t damage your relationship, you heard a soft chuckle left Hades’ lips and a reply

“I apologize for my obliviousness… but thank you for your reassurance”

Wait what? Reassurance? Fr? Like— fr?!!

You felt your cheek heat up, so does his. Hades lean in to place a peck on your cheek and pat you

“I like you too”

Flabbergasted was just an understatement, you couldn’t process anything but the only thing you’re sure you’re feeling is happiness and love

You look at him, now slightly flustered expression, which suits him a lot. You lean up and return the peck

Holy shit, having hades’ as a partner is literally every girls dream

Since he have quite lots of work, he’s quite clingy. When he have a free time he would cuddle you and spending times with you ended up with him going back to his work late

He loves you with all of his heart and he never dares to not return the affections because you have to feel how good you make him feel!

He’s also not ashamed of giving you affection or you giving him too much in public, like when he’s having a meeting with the Olympus gang. You who weren’t even invited is sitting on his lap and calling him like “hades my pookie bear” he loves it a lot and love his relatives’ reactions (Poseidon being the most disgusted)

He cares a lot like A LOT about you, example like when you cough a little he would immediately become worried and ask if you’re ok, he’ll go get you warm water and meds

Of course you tell him to calm down, although you love that about him

He doesn’t often get jealous because he trust you and loves you! Though sometimes he’s a bit unhappy when you’re too close with some other god/goddesses. But he wouldn’t cause a scene and just look away until you’re back to him

He🗣️definitely🗣️cook🗣️so🗣️good🗣️even though most of the time you would cook for him, but when it’s his day off he would make the most delicious meal known to Olympus for you, his love of his life

He could go on days ranting about how you’re a light that lit up his dark life into a fun spontaneous one, he loves you so much even words can’t even describe how much he cherish you

[mostlycorrectdipandpip]

Writing Phan Fiction About Ourselves Stories

I literally just listened to the video, typed as fast as I could, then edited the red squiggles and formatted it to look nice. Let me know what edits need to be made!

Story 1 - The Dragon Prince by Dan Howell

Once upon a time, there was a boy named Dan, from House Fire, whose motto was, "The fire in our ass will never die" and from Phil, the House Amazing, the Kingdom of Squatting. They were sworn enemies whose houses had been at war ever since The Great Lamp Licking incident. One day, Dan was bathing his fiery drake, Kamala Harris, when he saw a glint in the refection of his gauntlet. It was a surprise attack from that scally wag, Phil. He mounted his dragon and yelled his signature war cry, "ZING!"

Phil looked down on the Fire Kingdom. "More like squishy kingdom!" But before he knew it, Dan was on his tail. He was so close he was practically on his toe. Their beasts, Kamala Harris and Markiplier, realeased flames at the same time, like a torrent of lethal piss. Double KO, they fell to the ground and loss consciousness. Dan awoke to find Phil's brain stuck in Dan's eye. He shouted, "Wow, this is a moist situation." Phil roused, gayly. "You saved me," he said.

They locked eyes and knew in that moment how futile their feud was. They saved each other, did they have to slay each other? In that moment, Phil felt something skipping down his hips. He swam as hard as he could and suddenly, he felt it. Phil had birthed a beautiful purple egg. Dan scoffed, "the prophecy is true! It's our child!"

"The legendary worm, and we shall name him Gary," said Phil.

THE END

Story 2 - The Princes by Phil Lester

Once upon a castle, in the Kingdom of Evony, there were two princes belonging to warring families. Tonight was the last time they would meet before the great battle. Danielo awoke, sword in hand as he heard a shuffle at the door. Philipus walked into hid bedroom wearing a panty.

"I didn't mean to disturb you, but I thought I'd tell you that my father is bringing a dragon into the battle, and also a large enchanted hippo." Danielo cried a single tear.

"I don't want to die for this stupid family. I just want to be a knight with you and help old ladies cross the street."

"Why must we spill blood?" Danielo smirked. "Glory and amazon coins."

Philipus says, "Since it's our final night together, I thought we could do our favorite activity, twerking together. It might make up a bit sweaty, but it makes me constipated."

As the sun rose, the two knights had fallen asleep in a hay field using rabbit shit as bedding. This was the morning of the battle, they would be rivaling sides, leading the charge against each other. Danielo few into battle on his dragon, Jeff, scanning lines for his prince, Philipus. Philipus raised his sword into the sky as he was silhouetted by the beast. This was not a fair fight. The war had begun, thousands were being killed. Philipus has a secret weapon, a medieval salami.

His best friend flew down from his dragon and approached him. They crossed swords.

"I can't do this, Philipus" screamed Danielo. "I want to move to North Korea and start our jobs as OnlyPhans' models."

Philipus tried to reason with him, but suddenly Danielo's dragon, Jeff, started to breath fire at them both. It was so hot that Danielo was on fire. He had one final word for Philipus.

"Yeee," as both knights burned to death. They were then eaten by the dragon as a toasty BBQ snack. They tasted like Takis Fuego. The dragon went on to kill all soldiers and both kings. It ruled the castle in a happy gay life with his dragon boyfriend, Alessandra and laid a dragon egg they called Kip. They never saw a human again. The Princes were always remembered as the tastiest snacks in the Kingdom.

Story 3 - The Big Sword by Phan Howlter

They stared at the intimidating shape, thinking, "damn, that is one crusty shaft". Two lowly village boys had found a cave filled with sour cream and onion pringles. One of us must grip this with our teeth. They know one of them would gain the power of hamster flicking.

"I believe its you!" Mr. Phil, the wet pauper, exclaimed.

"Thank you. I got this for you. It's my favorite Party Hat."

"We will never know which on of us is truly the chosen one," uttered Dan, sexily. "We'll have to do it together."

And so the boys stood wearing sports bras, daring to survive the cyclone threatening to bare down on the. They interlocked hands on the shaft as they thought of their favorite food, egg.

"Either we both become heroes, or we might as well become trump supporters."

They yanked it with the might of a thousand anteaters and it burst from the ground, but in that moment, a glint of greed in each boys eye. They wanted the greatness for themselves and all of the steak knives waiting for them in the village. So they tumbled as the blade ripped open their jockstraps and with boing, they knew it was over and they were both impaled on the sword. Gravity was pulling them closer, like a toilet lid. As their noses pressed together, the blood poured out of them like a hydro pump.

"I always knew it would end like this," says Dan.

"You mean scared and throbbing?"

"I wouldn't rather do this with anyone else."

Then they died. Then forever, their petrified bodies stood as a warning to all who sought glory, if you dare to thrust, you will get put on the naughty step.

(respectfully, this was like.... a hard launch right? Like this is the hardest lauch I have ever seen??)

[slayfics]

Okay, a sudden idea just popped up in my head. You can write this anytime you want or you can just ignore it but if your interested in writing, how about reader who is on the verge of death, gets saved by muichiro ? How would he react ? Or what would he do in a situation like that ? Your fanfics are what motivates me as a writer !! I literally became on because I wanted to be like you 😭❤️

Muichiro saves you.

Warnings: blood

This was by far the most challenging demon you had ever fought. You were struggling to keep up with its moves, and multiple times you had brought your blade down on its neck only to be unable to slash it.

Think- You thought to yourself. What would Muichiro do?

You suddenly had an idea come to mind. The final Mist Breathing form Seventh Form: Obscuring Clouds. It was a dangerous idea, you had only managed to use it properly once. The move focused on confusing the demon on your position then when you finally do go in for the strike you are extremely slow.

It was risky- if you didn't do it right you'd for sure be dead. But you had to try something you were losing stamina fast and wouldn't be able to do anything else soon.

On a whim, you attempted the Seven Form giving it everything you got. You spun around the demon which worked to confuse it. Seeing your opening you finally went in for the strike. The demon being taken off guard had barely any time to react, but still, it was not enough.

As your blade finally came down slicing the demon's head off, the demon at the same time went to strike you, hitting a vital organ. The demon's head fell to the floor disintegrating at once, and you fell down next to it.

Shit- I'm going to die, you realized. It wouldn't be long before you'd bleed out from your injury. Using the strength you had left you focused your breathing on slowing the bleeding. If you could hold out long enough, maybe just maybe another corps member would find you.

It didn't take long before in the distance you heard someone approaching. You felt your heart skip a beat at your good fortune. Much longer and you would have not made it. I hope this is an experienced corps member you thought, just as you were met with the sight of Muichiro looking down at you.

His eyes instantly widened in alarm at the state you were in and he dropped to the floor next to you.

"Keep focusing on your breathing," He instructed as he ripped off one of his sleeves and tied it around your injury to put pressure.

As grateful as you were that Muichiro had found you, you couldn't help but feel embarrassed that you had been so badly injured by not even an upper-rank demon.

"I'm sorry tok-," You began to say but Muichiro brought a finger to your lips shushing you.

"Do not apologize, you risked your life to slay a demon. That is what any Hashira would have done."

You felt a smile spread on your lips at his praises but slowly your vision began to blur.

"Keep focusing on your breathing, and I'll get you to the butterfly mansion as soon as possible," he said, gently grabbing you into his arms. Upon picking you up in his arms Muichiro realized how bad off you were. You didn't even have the strength to hold your head up or wrap your arms around him for support.

Muichiro carefully placed the weight of your head against his chest and his arm, keeping your head upright to avoid any choking. Once he felt comfortable with how secure you were, he took off in the direction of the butterfly mansion.

"Alert Miss Kocho we are coming," He said to his crow who swiftly flew ahead.

Muichiro continued to make his way as fast as he could without disturbing you in your arms. Even with his swift pace you were beginning to lose consciousness and started to come to terms with possibly dying.

"Tokito-" You called in barely above a whisper.

"Hm?" He glanced at you then back up, continuing to run.

"I- I'm glad it's you here with me- if this is my last-"

"No!" He yelled. "We still have so much to do together, do not even begin to say such things!" Tears swelled up in his eyes. "Just keep focusing on your breathing, save all your strength for that! We're almost there!" He looked down at you once more seeing the sleeve he had tied around you was now soaked through as was his own uniform where he was holding you. Yet your soft breathing continued, you followed his orders and did not give up just yet.

Finally passing through the gates of the Butterfly Mansion, Shinobu was ready and waiting. Instantly taking you to bed and getting to work attending to your wound.

"She'll be alright?" Muichiro asked, voice shaking.

"I'm going to try my best, it's a wonder she survived this long," Shinobu answered.

Thank you for the request Kye! You’re too sweet ahhh! You’re doing amazing with your own fics keep it up! For anyone that hasn’t check out @sleepykye fics! Her work is so unique and adorable~

Tags~

@aeolia18 @yandere-kou @sakurasunkiss @hashiroses @plvuii @snowmist-hashira

[blackknight-100]

I'm absolutely obsessed with how mythology portrays parent-child relationships, especially when at least one divine party is involved. I've talked about Karna and Arjuna's relationship with their fathers, and how it might tie up to their characters and situations, and the Mahabharata as a whole, but they're not the only ones! Speaking exclusively about father-son dynamics in this post, and we have a lot of them!

You have Yudhisthira, whose father Yama/Dharma shows up in his son's mortal life twice (iirc), gives him a 20 min quiz each time and then tells him that no son, we don't allow dogs in heaven (which, how dare, but we all have that one parent). This is so in line with Yudhisthira's arc, poor man that he is, having to spend his whole life finding answers to questions about righteousness and honour, losing his friends, brothers, wife and children in the process.

Rama-Dasharatha and Ganesha-Shiva are pretty straightforward - there's plenty of mutual love and respect despite the horrors ™️ , but then there is Rama and Luv-Kush. If you're counting the Uttar Kand, then these boys literally saw their mother die because there father could not stop questioning her honour. That has to mess with your head. There's no way it's a happily ever after story.

Another man who interests me greatly is Yayati. Like sir... what were you doing. Who grows old and thinks, "You know what would be great? Me borrowing my son's youth" and then curses them when they refuse? What were you thinking. What were your kids thinking. I need to take your heads apart with a scalpel, this is so incredibly insane. A father should give to his children - the only thing this man "gave" was to spare Puru from his curse.

You have Bhishma and Shantanu, another wild story. I understand that Bhishma chose to give up his birthright to make Shantanu happy, but can you actually tell me Shantanu wasn't at least somewhat interested in the plan? Shantanu is Bhishma's father, it's his job to stop him from doing things like this. I feel like pulling my hair out everytime I think of this. You can tell that Bhishma was afraid for his father's well-being when he made this decision, and that so... unfair.

On the other end of the spectrum are Krishna and Vasudeva, who are wholesome to the point of despair. Vasudeva giving up his everything just to get his boy out of prison?? Waiting years and years for him, but never lamenting or cursing Krishna for not coming fast enough??? That's peak fatherhood (Shantanu take lessons). And Krishna honours that sacrifice!! He comes from idyllic Vrindavan, slays the tormentor of his parents and rips the bars of their prison!!! And that old married couple trapped within those dank, dreary walls, with no one except the other for company, watches their godly son turn up to free them and show them the sky for the first time in more than a decade - the thought of it brings me to tears. Possibly the only part I like about the change from baby!Krishna to adult!Krishna is his reunion with Vasudeva and Devaki!

Oh, and last but not least, our favourite problematic pair: Jamadagni and sons. I'm slightly terrified by how Jamadagni was like "kill your mother for me she's sinful >:(" and when four sons refused, he actually killed them. HIS OWN SONS! Admittedly, in some versions he asks Parashuram to do the killing but like... those are his brothers. Who probably swaddled him and rocked him and fed him and played with him. And all this is presumably happening right in front of Renuka. And then Parashuram has to kill his mother as well, unless he wants to be a heap of ashes.

(In some versions, including the one I've always heard as a child, Parashuram is said to be "aware of" his father's immense power, which just seems to me a really polite way to say that Parashuram knew disobeying his father had consequences ™️ that weren't always right or rational)

Worse, after the killing is done, Jamadagni is so pleased he offers Parashuram a boon, presumably with the remains of the rest of his family still nearby, and when Parashuram asks for his mother and brother to be revived, Jamadagni is all like "ooh actually I got really angry, I think I'm going to renounce rage forever. Dw btw your brothers and mother forgot you killed them you're welcome <3"

Sir??? This is what you got out of the whole issue???? No wonder Parashuram killed a whole bunch of kings, this couldn't have been healthy.

[chasingpj]

Hi! Congratulations on the 1k! Your deserve it! Your stories in tumblr and Ao3 are my favorites! Can I ask for a blurb ✒️of prompt 4 with Percy? I hope you don’t mind. No pressure though! Thank you so much! 😊

[𝟑:𝟏𝟐𝐚𝐦]

"We can't take care of a baby."

pairing: percy jackson x reader

warning: abandoned baby

category: slice of life

a/n: thank you so much for your support! i hope you like it!

Soft limbs flail in the fluffy purple blanket, the baby's cries of distress did a fine job at making sure they were heard. Even as you coo at the fussy child in your arms, you cringe at the sharp sound. “Percy!” Your voice echoes along with his cries. Green eyes meet yours in an instant, your boyfriend out of breath from the battle he just won. “You scared him!” 

The son of Poseidon gives you a look that makes your throat bubble in laughter. He literally couldn’t have slayed that monster any quieter. Shaking his head at your teasing he approaches you and the baby.

A helpless baby in a desolate alleyway wasn’t a part of your plans. From the dream you had last night, you only saw the location, not what you were sent there for. No doubt the dream was given to you by someone. Who that someone could be? You didn’t know yet but this child wasn’t any regular one. The harpies clawing at the basket, trying to get ahold of him through the narrow wedge between the dumpster and the brick wall told you enough. 

Percy’s hand rests at the small of your back, peering over your shoulder at the boy. “Who do you think his parents are?” He asks, index finger carefully pulling the blanket away to see his small face. The baby takes a few deep breaths after its startled cries and Percy chuckles softly, “Sorry buddy, didn’t mean to scare you.”

A smile graces your lips. Half because Percy’s just so cute and the other half is from the soft whines leaving the baby as if he was responding.

“Do you think we can keep him?” Looking over your shoulder, you give Percy a pout. You even bring the baby’s cute face next to yours for extra effect.

Your boyfriend raises an eyebrow at you, slightly amused at your attempt to persuade him. “We can’t take care of a baby.” 

He shakes his head but your pout persists. “We can put a crib in your cabin,” you add. 

The suggestion makes his laugh. “You’re gonna put a crib in MY cabin when YOU want to keep him?” 

“Yes, you have more space and less siblings, it’s only right!” 

Percy hums but you know it’s not a hum of consideration. As he walks past you in the direction back to camp, you’re quick to catch up. “Well, who else will take care of him?” You challenge. “Chiron isn’t gonna do it! I can’t even imagine Mr. D having any interest or knowledge.” “I think the nymphs and satyrs will do just fine at raising him,” Percy points out and you pause in your tracks. You forgot about them. Reminded that there were plenty of people who could take care of him just made you sad.

You really wanted to keep him.  Percy smirks at your dramatic hmph and he peers down at the baby one more. “I mean… he is cute…”