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mishasminions · 4 years ago

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The Last Time I’ll Write a Long Post About Supernatural (15x18-15x20)

15 YEARS OF WATCHING THIS SHOW. 11 YEARS OF RUNNING A BLOG ABOUT IT. IT’S BEEN QUITE A RIDE.

[15x20 Speculation + evidence at the bottom]

First off, I just wanna come clean and say, after all these years, I still think they should’ve ended at Season 5.

If you’re going to come at me with “Then why’d you stick around to watch it if you didn’t like it?”, your question is immature, and the answer is simple: I just want to know what happens next (I also love the main characters and their actors too). You can watch a show and still think it’s shit.

Call me a clown, but despite all the disappointment and trust issues that this show has given me, I would still look forward to the day where it might just turn itself around and bring back the quality it once had, or realize the potential of each story it was trying to tell, or at the very least, do justice by my favorite ship.

Never happened.

They’ve had a few good episodes here and there. I can’t imagine the SPN Universe without The Man Who Would Be King, The French Mistake, and Scoobynatural. Seasons 6-10 were enjoyable at times. I blocked out most of 7 & 11-15.

If you’ve been following this blog since its heydays in 2010-2014, you’d know I’d try my best to defend Destiel and this show’s decisions regarding it no matter what.

Because you know what, as a CONCEPT, this show is good. If you take a look at all the worlds its storylines have birthed in fanfiction/fanworks, you’d see how much Supernatural has wasted its own story arcs. The writing got shittier as each season progressed, and they’ve obviously given up in production as well because the quality in the execution has noticeably gone down too, but if you take a step back and take a look at the bigger picture, you’ll see that this show still tries to make sense of itself.

[If you’re still following this post, please bear with me, I know this is long, but I just want you to understand how jaded and pessimistic I am with regards to this show, so maybe you can buy into whatever hopeful thing I’m about to say later on.]

SO LET’S TALK ABOUT DESTIEL

Never in my wildest dreams did I think that they would give us Castiel’s “I love you” speech. To the point where, if I weren’t so desperate for it, I would argue that it was completely out of character for him to word vomit the way he did (but I’m not gonna diss on that right now because I’ll take what I can get).

I’ve valued every meaningful and obscure exchange that Dean and Cas have had in the earlier seasons, and I was willing to accept their relationship as just that--undefined, without any clear boundaries as to what they really are. And I think that was beautiful on its own.

But now, they’ve chosen to define it.

After they’ve driven every possible wedge between Dean and Castiel in seasons 11-15, to try to explain away their feelings as something they offer to a collective.

Dean can’t mourn and pray for JUST Cas, he has to mourn and pray for EVERYBODY--even Crowley, even some chick he just met, because god forbid he cries about just the guy who has given up everything for him--that would be “too homo”.

They’ve even set Cas on a path to abrupt fatherhood just so he can care about something other than Dean. Make it seem as if Dean wasn’t his purpose through and through.

And after all these years of this stupid show trying to deny it, they choose to acknowledge it at the worst possible circumstance, at a time where they’ve been so far apart, that it seems so foreign for them to suddenly come together.

But here we are. And they’ve chosen to tell us.

Chosen to tell us that everything that Castiel has done leading up to his death, he has done it because he was IN LOVE WITH DEAN WINCHESTER.

Chosen to tell us that the ONE THING THAT WOULD MAKE CAS HAPPY IS DEAN WINCHESTER.

Chosen to tell us that BEING WITH DEAN WINCHESTER is something that CAS WANTS BUT KNOWS HE CAN’T HAVE.

And they’ve also chosen to tell us nothing about how Dean feels.

Sure, finding out your angel made a deal, the stipulations of said deal, his newfound happiness philosophy, his long-winded monologue of why he loves you and why you’re worthy of his love, and to top it all off he tells you that being in love with you is enough to make him happy while he subtly hints that he’s always wanted to be WITH you romantically, was a lot to process in the 5 minutes after you’ve just had an existential crisis.

It’s whatever, right? Let’s culminate 11 years worth of tension and feelings in 5 minutes. Let’s waste the entire episode with cringey expository dialogue, and irrelevant sequences. The whole season was a waste anyway.

You know what Supernatural? FUCK YOU FOR THAT. They deserved better. WE deserve better.

And I would love nothing more than to hurl every possible insult your way,

But for the last time, I’m going to HOPE that you’re finally going to try to make it better for the fans that stuck by you all these years.

No more baiting new viewers, no more placating casual viewers, no more excuses. 15 years. Bring it home for the people who have actually been around.

SO HERE’S HOW I THINK 15x20 IS GONNA GO

There’s two ways this series is gonna end. Horribly or Spectacularly.

First let’s all take into consideration what Andrew Dabb says about it:

So, let’s start with

ENDING HORRIBLY

In this scenario, Misha is telling the truth about his last day of filming being 15x18. His “camping trip” during the last few days of filming 15x20, was actually a camping trip. He doesn’t go to Vancouver to shoot.

Jensen wasn’t “being careful” during the zoom interviews that it was just him and Jared quarantining for the shoot, it really was just him and Jared (althought most of these were done pre 15x19) Supernatural isn’t smart enough to do misleading PR, and they’re once again oblivious to the potential of their own story.

Misha hasn’t posted a “Goodbye Castiel” tweet because he’s probably saving it for last episode or he forgot because it was overshadowed by the Destiel trend that night.

So what we get is:

Sam and Dean are on the road again, up against the monster of the week. Only their world no longer has actual Supernatural beings anymore, so the monsters they’re fighting are humans.

Humans end up killing the Winchesters (despite having gone up against literally every powerful being imaginable INCLUDING God himself). Dean and Sam end up in heaven and relive their greatest hits.

Meanwhile, Castiel rots in The Empty because he died after realizing that he was happy and gay. Jack doesn’t bother rescuing him—his surrogate dad, the guy who made this specific deal to spare him—even though it was so easy for him get Cas in and out of The Empty when he had a fraction of the power that he has now.

Dean never speaks of Castiel’s confession because despite all the hints of a profound bond in the earlier seasons, and the fact that Dean has never cared for anyone (who isn’t his actual brother) as immensely as he does Cas, Supernatural just can’t have its main macho character be “suddenly bisexual” because that would hurt the male ego or some shit.

His heaven would probably be living happily ever after with his family. “Family” meaning Mary and John Winchester--two of the shittiest parents ever (but they’re not going to include them in this episode like they were supposed to because of Covid) and Sam.

Sam also gets a dog. As usual.

I wouldn’t put it past Supernatural to do this. After everything they’ve pulled, this would be right up their alley. I actually expect this ending.

Anyway, onto the next possible ending

ENDING SPECTACULARLY

In this scenario, Supernatural tries to stick the landing, and Jensen’s whole “It didn’t sit well with me at first, but then I took a step back after talking to Kripke, and realized that I had to view it from an audience perspective, I am now really excited about it” (DC Con 2019) anecdote about his thoughts on the final episodes, were actually about Dean potentially ending up with Cas. (Which would totally make sense because Jensen at first didn’t see Dean as anything but hetero, but as of late, he has been throwing in Destiel jokes of his own, so he seems to have warmed up to the idea)

Backed with Misha’s tidbit (DLConline 2020) that he and Jensen had conversations about Destiel, and that they wouldn’t have gone through with it if Jensen wasn’t onboard with it, but Jensen didn’t push back at all. (Why would they need to check with Jensen if it was just Cas going all in?)

Robert Berens (writer of 15x18) also wrote the script at the beginning of Season 15, but made Misha privy to the concept a year prior (Season 14), so they went into this season knowing about Destiel going canon.

This one’s a reach, but this scenario also supposes that Misha was lying about his whereabouts during the filming of the final episode, and him saying that 15x18 was his last episode is part of the diversion to avoid taking away from the weight of Castiel’s death.

And that Supernatural is actually self-aware of its own material (similar to how they have wrapped things up in the past—lots of expository dialogue, poor execution, but fulfills the story arc)

Since Season 15 is basically a Meta Season (Chuck/God as a writer, pretentiously calling out how he created the worlds, its characters, and basically invalidating the past 14 seasons), and 15x19 is supposedly the finale for Season 15, written by two of the worst Supernatural writers, Brad Buckner and Eugenie Ross-Leming (Bob Singer’s wife), then we can assume that 15x19 is where the shitty writers kill themselves--as Chuck, of course.

So we get a badly written episode that produces a bad ending, or as Becky put it, “All action, and no Cas”

So we get the bad writers season ending at 15x19.

And 15x20 is where Sam and Dean write their own stories, and where the cast had a hand in pitching ideas for it.

Dabb has mentioned that 15x20 (Act Two) is a SERIES finale, where they try to resolve the characters’ journeys.

Because as everyone has acknowledged, Supernatural isn’t about the story, it’s about the characters.

So here’s what we can get out of it:

With no more Supernatural beings left to fight, Sam and Dean are in a stalemate. They’ve resigned themselves to fighting to the bitter end, but the “end” has passed, and they’re still standing.

So they try to figure out who they are now, and what they want out of the life they still have.

Sam still wants a normal apple pie life. Before Dean dragged him out of college to go hunting with him, he had a whole life planned out for him. Become a lawyer, settle down with a nice girl, and get a dog. He gave all that up because they had work to do, but now the work is finished, he can finally go back to wanting that for himself again.

Dean finally realizes his self-worth after Cas saves him again. His prayer to Cas in purgatory may have helped him come to terms with his anger, but the whole “you’ve done everything you did for love” speech finally put him in his place, and he learns not to hate himself anymore.

But of course, he cannot fully reconcile with himself if he doesn’t get Cas back, and tell him how he feels.

Because Dean actually wants something for himself this time. Something he knows he can finally have if he can just salvage it.

So maybe this time around, with the help of Jack (off-screen), Dean saves Cas. Grips him tight and raises him from perdition.

They bypass The Empty deal by turning Cas human, and he lives the rest of his days with Dean.

Dean and Cas know they deserve to be saved, and they know that they deserve to be happy.

(Wishful thinking, maybe they kiss a little)

Anyway...

I’m just saying, there’s NO WAY that they’d have Cas go through that whole rushed speech, if they weren’t going to do anything about it later on.

But again, after 10 years of disappointment, I wouldn’t put it past Supernatural to pat themselves on the back and say, “Okay, we sort of gave them what they wanted. We’re good now”

If that’s the case, Supernatural, I’m sorry I wasted my time on you.

Here’s to hoping 🤡

#THE LAST TIME I'LL CLOWN FOR THIS SHOW #SUPERNATURAL #DESTIEL #15x20 #15x19 #15x18 #UNTAGGED #INSIGHTFUL INSIGHTS

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1994sunflower · 4 years ago

Note

How would Michael and Y/N deal with online classes during COVID?

omg I love this

well, obviously you’re quarantining with Michael in your apartment

just because you didnt want to bother Ashton with having to deal with you two together 24/7, even more than usual

what's funny is that its a great excuse to force him to go to classes

like you have his schedule and 5 minute before classes, you're forcing him to go on zoom and listen to lecture

but having classes with each other in the same building is weird for both of you

let alone weird for your classmates

imagine their shock when you're sitting there, listening to class with your camera on and they see the feared Michael Clifford in the background of your screen or behind you when you were sitting on his lap or even sitting next to you with his arms around you but they could still tell it was him by his tattoos on his arms

they'd be a little stressed about it also because they knew his calculating eyes were looking over your classmates and they didnt want to do anything that could possibly catch his attention in a negative way

or michael’s classes where under any other circumstances he wouldn't turn on his camera just because he didnt care enough to

even when his professors ask him to

and then suddenly, the camera is turned on because you overheard and turned it on for him

like the good student you were, following instructions

and there he was, looking as disinterested as always

but this time, you were in his arms

you tried to find a way to hide yourself obviously but he would just make you cuddle into him, head on his chest with his arms around your shoulders or otherwise he’d leave the class

and to his classmates, seeing the mean guy they knew having someone so tranquil and happy in his arms without him looking pissed off was....strange

if it was a small class and the professor brought your little appearance to attention

you’d wave shyly before maybe even trying to hide yourself further

but Michael wouldn't let you, he’d show you off proudly

sometimes he’d kiss you, on your lips/cheeks/head etc during class just because he got the urge to

or he’d whisper something in your ear that caused you to giggle and swat at his chest to get him to pay attention to his professor again with him just smiling down at you

and everyone would pretend not to notice but the wide eyes were enough to show that everyone saw the uncharacteristic display of affection

it was like these people were getting a glimpse into the elusive relationship that was always whispered about on campus

whenever he was put into breakout rooms, you would actually unmute him as well and force him to participate instead of him just silently letting his partners do the work or discussion like he would have otherwise

which was SHOCKING to his partners obviously

to see him so willingly obey someone else

and also to hear him talk???

the same thing would go for you too

like sometimes in your breakout rooms, they would hear him talk in the background or you in his arms, sitting on his lap, etc

and they'd be so surprised for the exact same reasons

plus seeing you being so intimate and close to him when they never imagined him allowing that even knowing that he was your boyfriend

everyone just kind of assumed he was cold to everyone and thats why the wonder was always how you could date him

but apparently that wasn't the case

tbh it would feel different for him - in a good way

he still didnt like going to lectures

but having you with him in a way he never could have you with him before during his classes, he felt almost fine with going

when you weren't right there with him though, like you had a class that overlapped or you were working/cooking

he would just sulk and feel the same distaste for it as he always did

nsfw under the cut because i couldn’t help myself

and yes he would try to fuck you during your classes sometimes

when your camera/mic was off during your bigger classes

and he suddenly got horny

he’d definitely start making out with you

to which you kept trying to pull away and focus

but each time he’d just start kissing your neck instead, whispering in your ear

I mean tbh he might try this even with your camera on

he’d try to sneak his hand to your core

and just see you try to maintain your facial expressions even with however he chose to toy with your pussy

I mean it was hot doing something so dirty semi-publicly

and his words to you during that....phew

but when your camera was off, he’d even just bend you over completely

so he was behind you, your chest was to your bed or couch and you were only able to be looking at the screen in front of you with all the different people in your class

helpless to pay attention

and instead just letting him do what he wanted to you

or you could be sitting on his lap and he’d be fucking up into you as you tried to keep listening to class

he was a bad influence really, making you miss huge portions of your classes because you were....preoccupied

God help you if you get called on in either situation because he would not do anything to stop but encourage you to unmute yourself and answer your professor

and his bad influence would rub off on you as well

which you sometimes felt bad about because you didnt want to distract him from his classes

but stopped feeling bad real quick after realizing that he had no shame or care - unlike you

if you started wiggling against him, whining about how you wanted him after class

best believe he’d take your hand and guide it to his already growing bulge as the professor spoke

he literally wouldn't care if his camera was on because he could control his facial expressions and they couldn't see below his chest

he’d let you rub your hand over him, even take him out and start stroking him

and he’d keep looking down at you, his face serious and tense, small groans escaping him, his breathing starting to quicken

he wasn't being as inconspicuous as he thought he was especially when his focus had obviously completely left his class as he was just staring down at you

but it gets worse if you decide to suck him off during class

like....obviously they cant see you

but he keeps glancing down

because he keeps looking at you taking him in your mouth

and pushing your head up and down against him

sometimes even thrusting

and he throws his head back, closing his eyes

which makes you freak out because others can see him if they’re looking

a big reason why you almost never never do it when he’s in a class where he has to have his camera on

unless its a big class where the chances of someone looking at him are really slim and he keeps asking you to if he’s horny or if you are

and I mean....you couldn't deny just how much it turned you on knowing you could capture his attention so quickly, making him abandon everything for you and how you made him feel

but you never let him do anything else to you in those circumstances because he would have to get up or move otherwise to get in position and you didnt want anyone to realize anything was up so he kept in his position in front of the camera like a regular student

but when he had his camera off, just like when you had yours off....well that was a different story

#5sos #5sos smut #5sos fluff #5sos imagines #Michael clifford #Michael clifford x reader #Michael clifford smut #Michael clifford fluff #bad boy michael #bad boy smut #bad boy fluff #college au #ask #questions

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organic-guacamole · 3 years ago

Text

showtime

episode 211 let's go

ok first of all, this is the second to last episode guys... I don't even wanna think about how much pain I'll be in after next week's episode

mr mazzara doing the recap-

this is so weird to me and I don't know why

WHY DIDN'T YALL JUST ASK BENJAMIN FOR HELP, THATS LITERALLY HIS THING

is Nini giving out the cards a callback to season 1 when Natalie Bagley said that Nini gave her a card or something on opening night of another musical?

STEPHY AS THE ENCHANTRESS OMG YES

Ricky in the crown gives me Harry styles in that photoshoot vibes

he's so pretty.

ok but why did we never see Ricky and Ashlyn interact before? it's been like 5 seconds and I already love how they bounce off each other and it's just so natural

OH THEY REALLY DON'T HAVE ANY UNDERSTUDIES-

well that explains a lot...

so Ricky fell on top of Ashlyn and all that broke for both of them was their wrist-

insert Jake Peralta *coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool no doubt no doubt no doubt*

of course howie was amazing as the beast, were we expecting anything less??

Ricky is so beautiful and I will not shut up about it....

let me enjoy this before the makeup crew slaps mud on his face.

Nini and Ricky talking to eachother? in a civil manner? wasn't she avoiding him just in the last episode? hm ok

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH THEY CANT EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS JUST LIKE ME HAHAHAHAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS, WHATS NEXT? THEY CUT EVERYONE OFF CUZ THEY CANT HANDLE EMOTIONS? ...ha

yes Kaden and Rico, my favourite east high boys 🥰

I mean....where's EJ?

THERE HE IS

EJ AND GINA IN THE BACKGROUND... doing something idek

KOURTNEY'S MOM IS BACK YAY

Howie is a shining star, ofc ofc

the smallest fOrk

can't wait to see the fork burst into song about how she deserves more than to be used to eat salad😌

the duster and the bluster.... ok😃

hi Gina!

hi- oh wow I didn't know Robbie Rotten was in this show!!!!!

the portwell look.

that my friends, is a married couple's look✋

GOSH EJ WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU

aww Gina's so excited for this

D word?

Die?

Delicious?

Dom Toretto?

"good, clean fun all alone with someone I dig...a lot"

sir that does not sound very clean to me

SEBLOS

Seb looks so cute standing there next to pope Carlos

DID THEYEY REALLY LIGHT ANTOINE ON FIRE-

I NEED TO SEE THAT

Seb's reading Carlos better than big red read the script in episode 102, this is great development after the "fight"

Kourtney really just made the best outfit for herself and let the rest of them suffer

the way Gina immediately goes to hold on to EJ after the announcement

"tonight we're going to put the U in UTAH"

...

"hey where are you from?"

"TAH"

SEB'S SINGULAR CLAP KILLED ME-

he's officially salt lake city's resident thanos

just wity clapping because for some reason I have a feeling he doesn't know how to snap his fingers...don't ask why

Ms Jenn do you mind encouraging your leads before the show? idk just an idea

pepto bismol product placement smhsmh

those flowers are bigger that big red himself-

*bops along to the opening theme*

that whistle at the end slaps everytime

WHY IS THE AUDIENCE SO MASSIVE

I guess they're all here to see Ms Jenn go on as a fork after Nini decides to *go her own way*

wow i am so funny

so they couldn't do many group scenes cuz of covid, but this 300 person crowd is cool? nice

OO THE VIOLIN GIRL FROM EPISODE 6 IS IN THE ORCHESTRA

HOWIEEEEEE

"Mr Caswell", he said, in the loudest voice possible while backstage at a show that's about to start.

Mazzara what are you trying to pull-

I usually like Benjamin but I don't like his tone

"iS yOuR wHoLe FaMiLy HeRe?" LIKE YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW THATS A SOFT SPOT FOR EJ

"we've had some good conversations these past few weeks"

right so what's going to happen after you graduate?

what does he think of you not going to Duke?

what did he say about you giving the sweatshirt that's been in the family for 3 generations to a girl you're not even dating?

good old Mr. M

therapist Mr. Mazzara, they all need it.

start with Ricky though.

"Michael Bowen"

dude why did you shave, now you look less like "hot lumberjack" and more "creep at the gas station"

OH-

does she not like Mike anymore?

why does it sound like jennzzara started dating and now they just sit back and talk smack about everyone in their freetime

break the fourth wall-

uhhhh im scared

why am I scared

he's scary

hehe flowers for Ricky, obviously for Ricky, ObViOuSLY

oh boy poor Michael

this man is in love, rip

why does Ms Jenn always look at people with her eyes open so wide

LILYYYY

I'm only excited because I really like the idea of lily and Ricky being friends, nothing more.

ha this guy's got jokes

a MOAT AROUND THE SCHOOL

wheeze

also he's very pretty.

"the wolves and very talented humans"

how dare he forget to mention the very talented wolves and normal humans, smh erasure

"being nice, what a concept" ted talk by Lily who still doesn't have a last name

did she just say lol out loud

same with the hug emoji last episode-

go touch some grass babes

the way he didn't say no, but said he didn't know how the east high kids would react-

not saying he does want to date her but that's an interesting thing to think about, also another thing to write an essay analysis on just to leave it in my drafts for a few months

awww lily genuinely trying to help him

sorry guys, I've been taken by the Lily charm (didn't know it existed until now but oh well)

REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I'LL NEVER SHIP PORTWELL?

just look at me now

the Lily wink I can't she's so cute-

HELP ME I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY LIL-

David Attenborough?

oh nvm it's Benjamin narrating the show in a really weird British accent for some reason.

STEPHY GOT MORE LINES YAY GOOD FOR HER

also is this to show that Nini doesn't care about being the star of the show anymore? the way she's supporting everyone else even though she's a fork?

I would pay for a special of the full musical ngl

OOO THE TRANSFORMATION WAS SMOOTH

shockingly

yo where did the makeup come from

man I wish I was a theatre kid

THIS IS STEPHY'S EPISODE NOW IDC✋

my girl is starring

"needs an X-factor"

Simon Cowbell creeps in

"it's a yes from me"

and them boom, he takes Nini and mistreats her horribly and then she comes back to theatre after deciding music isn't for her👍

"I thought she just hog-tied him?"

don't ask sebby, it's better if you don't know.

imagine they spotlight the wrong person and this dude is just some random person that likes writing down stuff during shows.

Ms Jenn just let them do what they rehearsed (at some point we never saw) or else this is gonna end horribly wrong

"help"

same Carlos, same

I love how seb is just his translator rn

I thought he said "great displeasure" instead of "greatest pleasure"....help?

big red coming out from throwing up to see his girlfriend star is the cutest thing in this show.

Ash and Gina dancing is so fun

I'm imagining them practicing at night at their home, watching the movie for the 100th time and making sure their one dance together is perfect

KOURTNEY YES

HOWIE IS IN LOVE AHHHH

I LOVE HOWIE SO MUCH

SEBBY

THIS SCENE HAS SO MUCH GOING ON I CAN'T KEEP UP

THIS IS SO GOOD

HOW???

no because I'm actually crying

I'm dead serious.

we need this musical released as a special

big red is so proud and I love to see it

Natalie: "if you do not by at least 20 dollars in concessions, you do not support art"

rando in the audience: "but I pay for ad free Spotify"

Mr Mazzara clapping in the distance

Gigi, the guy you like is talking to you, complimenting you and hyping you up

YOU LUCKY LITTLE FEATHER DUSTER

aw EJ teasing her about the chocolates in a way that doesn't make her feel bad? take notes Richard

JORDAN FISHER

there is no rest of the show idc Jordan is it for me

THE WIG CAP ON RICKY OMG

they look like they're high and having "deep" conversations on the floor

THE MEAN GIRL WITH THE EYES-

@sunshine-julie-molina YOU HEAR THAT

Natalie really just be coming for them all

Howie what is happening rn

I'm scared

"did you enjoy it"

"very much"

dude wants a kiss so bad

ASHLYN OMG

NO DON'T DO IT BECAUSE OF LILY, PUT YOUR OWN TWIST ON IT

I want a Jordan autograph please

just keep swim- oh pushing...

Gina is literally a giant next to him and I live for it

am I about to cry for the 3rd time in this episode?

yes.

Ricky's leg kicks under the table makes me so happy aw

the portwell glances will kill me.

ah yes, mashed potato snow

Mr. M.... I'm not a theatre kid but even I know you can't have your phone on backstage.

Howie please just do it

CHIP'S BIG LINE I CANT

I LITERALLY HAD TO PAUSE IT AMD SCREAM INTO MY MASK FOR A SOLID 2 MINUTES (I'm not at home rn) HES SO CUTE

oh ok bye Jordan

oo tea

NOT HIM BEING STARSTRUCK BECAUSE HE'S MEETING HIS FUTURE BROTHER IN LAW-

"we're all just glad Gigi has a big brother figure in her life"

excuse me for a few thousand hours while I laugh hysterically

THE CAMERA ZOOM ON EJS FACE AND EVERYTHING-

STOP EJ LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONNA CRY BUT I CAN'T TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY WITH THE STAGE MAKE-UP

someone else said this already but I think it's hilarious that they had to bring in 2 guest characters to create some portwell angst

omg this really is Cici's episode, found family is their thing

elevator music lol

I'm gonna bet that big red took the harness for his surprise for Ashlyn without realising what it was

did Ms. Jenn just....tell her most mentally unstable student....to commit suicide....on a disney show...was that....I'm very....well....what the actual-

oh and there she goes running off instead of trying to make it right

oh wow Nini's the hero, she's gonna save the show 🤩

😐

the judge is doing a sudoku

honestly if I went to the hsm show as well, I'd come prepared for this one too

Lily why are you looking like that-

I WAS JUST STARTING TO LIKE YOU DON'T MESS THIS UP

wow ok, there goes that.

omg

what if Howie was acting weird because he knew what Lily did and wanted to tell Kourtbut Lily threatened him so he was scared to-

anyways see y'all clowns next week when we all simultaneously lose all motivation for the week without Fridays to look forward to.

#hsmtmts #hsmtmts s2 #hsmtmts season 2 #hsmtmts spoilers #ej caswell #gina porter #ricky bowen #nini salazar roberts #seb mathew smith #carlos rodriguez #big red #ashlyn caswell #kourtney greene #howie my pizza king #lily hsmtmts

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ntamain · 4 years ago

Photo

Is my (24F) neighbour (27F) into me or is she just being friendly? How do I know if she's gay?

another gay gem from the r/relationship reddit

Update:

Image ID under the cut, please let me know if I did it wrong!

[Image ID: four screenshots of a post from the relationship subreddit by tumblr user nta-main. The title reads “Is my (24F) neighbour (27F) into me or is she just being friendly? How do I know if she’s gay?”

The text reads “Update post is now locked, I cant believe so many people were interested in us!! Thank you again for your support, comments and messages.

Hi all, I can't believe I'm asking for advice from a bunch of strangers on the internet but I don't really have anyone I can talk to about this. Sorry for the incoming essay but I guess I need to give history. I bought my first house in September last year, It was an odd time but everything just fell into place. It's quite a small village and everyone is really friendly so I got to know my neighbours soon after moving in - yes, socially distanced. Then I met my over-the-road neighbour, let's call her Elle. I can't describe it but it's the first time I've ever met someone and been lost for words and my heart was racing and just thought "omg", y'know?? So after I blushed my way through a welcome to the village type convo we only saw each other for a wave and hello for a few days.

To help kinda settle in I had my dog (Bea) with me for the first few weeks. During this time there was a massive increase in dog thefts in a nearby town, not just from gardens but literally wrestled away from people. If I'd have been working (furloughed off and on since March) then I would've taken Bea back to mum's but since I was home with her all day she stayed. So the local police advised to not walk dogs alone but we go out twice a day, a 10k run in the morning and a few miles walk in the evening. So obvs this scares me, but at the same time she is honestly a pain in the arse and gets upset if she doesn't go for a run and needs to be tired out so I'm kind of stuck at this point. Then along comes Elle. She knocked on the door and offered to come with us as she'd seen Bea and me in the evenings and everything kind of spiralled from there. I told her about my morning runs but she didn't really bite so I thought nothing of it. Then a few days later I bumped into her on a run, so she started joining us on those too.

A few months later and we are spending more and more time together everyday. It has now progressed to a run early morning, afternoon coffee, dinner most evenings and then the evening walk. It just seemed to happen without me really noticing. I didn't read into things that much as I don't want to get my hopes up and ruin anything until another neighbour commented about how much time we spend together and how "it's nice to see you young gals getting on" and winked. She actually winked at me. I asked her what she meant but she just laughed and said "you know what I mean". So now I'm looking back on things and wondering if she could like me too?

Here's some reasons why she might like me:

I went running along the same route at the same time for nearly 2 weeks before I happened to run into her a few days after I told her this?

I make her a coffee every afternoon (Elle is WFH) and take it over in her fave mug. She says I make good coffee but I'm pretty sure I saw a fancy coffee machine the first time I went round (it's not there now?).

Elle carried on running and walking with me even after Bea went home. I told her she was going back to mum's and she said well "I'll have to make another excuse to join you" and then we just carried on everyday.

She has tried really hard to bond with Bea. Bea is a very anxious dog and is scared of everyone except me and mum. Elle bought special treats to give her everyday and has been so amazing with her and never tried to force anything. When I asked her she said "it's important to me that she likes me and is comfortable". Bea actually fell asleep between us on the sofa yesterday and It just makes my heart skip a beat guys.

She invited me to the zoom quiz she does with her friends every fortnight or so and they were all like "oh so this is who we've heard so much about "

We realised we had become each other's support bubble. Elle asked if I was meeting anyone else and I said no, she said she was glad she had me all to herself (!!)

We gave each other quite personal xmas presents. Like, it actually made me tear up it meant so much to me. And she bought stuff for Bea!!

Reasons why she might not like me:

All the reasons above, but that she's just doing them because she's a fucking great person and we're friends?

It might sound dumb but idk I need your help guys. She is the just the most incredible person I have ever met and I really really like her but if she isn't gay or doesn't feel the same I don't want to lose her friendship as she has become such a huge part of my life. I genuinely have no experience with these kind of things as I went to quite a strict all girls school, so it's not as if there were any relationships around me as a teen and then I went to a very small uni (8 of us on my course). I guess another reason is that I've struggled with anxiety and depression for the past 10 years, as well as my weight and working on my self confidence, but I can say that right now I am the happiest and healthiest (both mentally and physically) I have ever been. I've only just really become comfortable with the fact that I'm gay and I have never really told anyone in real life, but I don't think people would be too surprised lol. I don't have any close friends as no one stuck around when I was really struggling with my MH a few years ago so I can't discuss this with anyone irl.

So I need your advice : how do I find out if she is gay? And no, I don't have the confidence to just ask!! What if she says no and I ruin everything? She has never mentioned anything about past relationships and I'm pretty tactless so not sure how I could naturally slip it into the convo. Like, "hey tell me have you ever had a girlfriend? Do you want one now?" Lol. And how can I make a move without really making a move so I don't ruin things??

tl;dr : Don't know whether my neighbour is gay and into me or is just really friendly. How can I make a move without ruining our friendship?

Edit: Ok guys, thank you so so much for all your support and encouragement. You've all given me a lot to think about. I think I'm going to casually slip some gay stuff into conversation and see how she reacts. Then bring up the neighbours comment like some of you suggested, seeing as tho the neighbour was heavily implying that we're gay. I'll do it tonight otherwise I'll talk myself out of it again. I will post an update to let you know what happens (eek). If you never hear from me again assume it went badly and I am consoling myself with cake and watching brokeback mountain in floods of tears.

Hi reddit, yes it's me the useless lesbian. First off I want to thank you all for your support, encouragement and advice - and the undeserved awards! I never expected this many of you to take the time to comment and that so many of you were rooting for us.

So I had the plan to drop these gay hints into convo like you guys suggested but honestly it all went out the window. Elle was kinda stressed friday after a shitty work zoom and just needed to vent so it wasnt the right time to start anything. Though I guess I must have been a bit off thanks to spending all day overthinking things on here, as Elle turned up Saturday morning rambling about stressing me out and apologised (!!) for ruining dinner. Obvs I said "what are you talking about you can talk to me about anything", and she said "anything?" and I said "anything" back. And guys the tension was unreal, staring at each other and hoping our lesbian mind reading powers would kick in.

Then there was some loud noise like a car backfiring or something and the moment went. So I went to make coffee and then Elle asked me why I was a bit quiet the night before and I said something about overthinking stuff and she said "what stuff" and idk you guys I wasnt prepared to be put on the spot my casual gay pop culture references were useless in this moment. My mind just went completely blank and I forgot every single thing you guys suggested and my heart was pounding and I just blurted out you know I like you, right?.

...And then she kissed me. Kissed me. We straight up just snogged in the kitchen and it was fucking great. So...you were right. You were all fucking right. She's gay, she likes me and has been trying to drop hints for nearly 5 months. sigh

We were both just too scared to make a move or ruin anything. Turns out she's been burned by straight girls in the past, so she's pretty wary and was hoping I'd straight up say I'm a lesbian so she'd know for sure - maybe the I'm a lesbian wall hanging would've been a good idea after all? Her friends have been helping her drop hints, she showed me the group chat and guys their suggestions ranged from flirting more to just turning up in a trenchcoat and nothing else lol. Also, the winking neighbour has been making comments to her as well, so shout out to her for trying to make this happen too.

So no cake and cry watching brokeback mountain, just 5 months of dating to catch up on. As for worrying about how our current schedule could be more date like during lockdown, you were right it's kinda irrelevant when you've essentially been dating the whole time. Though we never made it to our morning run yesterday, in fact we didn't leave the house at all, ha.

Thank you guys for giving me hope, even if all your suggestions completely disappeared in the moment. Maybe I'll show her the post later and ask if any of the suggestions would have worked.

tl;dr: she's gay, into me and I'm an idiot”

End image ID]

#this is for sure already on tumble #but it's so cute #I had to #mine #r/relationships #tw// ed #edit: I'll add a transcript in a minute just gotta figure out how to make it accessible

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moonysdora · 4 years ago

Text

Okay I'm bored and I thought about what would Remadora look like in quarantine so here you go

At first, they both LOVED being in quarantine because they don't see each other as much as they want to

You know... Tonks being an Auror and stuck at work the whole day and Remus in Hogwarts...

Although they hated work from home

Tonks had LOTS of paperwork

Believe it or not, Hogwarts students had zoom class just like we Muggles had (or still have)

Remus could not understand electronics no matter what

So his calls were a bit awkward cause he didn't know how anything works

But he eventually got the hang of it

The best parts of Zoom class was when the students would hear either Teddy crying or Tonks tripping or spilling coffee on her papers so she starts swearing

Remus tries not to laugh

But fails

Speaking of Teddy, he loved sitting in his father's lap when he was teaching and he was smiling and laughing and playing with Remus' pens

Then, all the students were paying attention to Teddy, not Remus

Which made him frustrated

But he couldn't help but smile

Cause you know, he didn't think he would ever have a family

Teddy sometimes tapped his little hands on Remus' keyboard

So the chat would be like: Professor Lupin: jeiwbsuwbuajsvtabqvsysujf

Teddy also once disconnected Remus from the class

Which made Remus swear A LOT

Tonks started laughing so hard she feel off her chair

Teddy was grinning at his mother and clapping his hands

Remus was just done with them

But their son also sat in Tonks' lap a few times

He somehow managed to get ink all over his hand and started pressing his paws all over his mother's papers

Which made her a bit angry but she literally could not be mad at her son

But then he put his hand on her cheek

Then she got a big angry

Remus started laughing uncontrollably in front of his students

Tonks glared at him

Which made him laugh even harder

Teddy was just putting his ink-covered hands all over the table

But they also had fun and fluffy moments

Teddy was saying Dowa (Dora) all the time since he always listens his father talk and he says that word the most

Both Tonks and Remus just started crying when he said that

They could also sleep a little longer, which they were thankful for

They also had more time for intimacy

They were also doing it in the shower 😏

Tonks eventually found out she was pregnant

And upon further investigation, she was actually 4 weeks along

She was obviously happy but a bit scared at how Remus will react

He was over the moon (bad pun i know) and couldn't wait for their second cub :)

She called Molly and she was weeping for 10 minutes

She also wanted to come over

But Tonks reminded her she can't

Then Molly was ranting for 10 minutes about how angry she is she can't visit

All while Remus was standing next to Tonks and was laughing into her hair

When she had her morning sickness, Remus would hold and hug Teddy because he got scared for his mummy

Remus assured him she was fine, better than fine actually

He couldn't believe it

Andddd... the full moon arrived soon

Remus was in the basement of their house, secured and locked

He had Wolfsbane but still wouldn't risk it

He mostly just slept through the night

In the morning, Tonks would heel the wounds he got from the transformation

He would say she didn't need to as she was pregnant and that he was the one who should take care of her

But then she snapped as she did during her first pregnancy how she doesn't need to be taken care of

Remus rolls his eyes but he smiles

Cause he knows he can't change his wife's mind no matter what

Teddy would be there, looking at his dad with concern on his face but then he cuddled next to him on the couch and they both fell asleep

Tonks just had to take a picture of that

When she starts showing, Teddy can't keep his hands off her belly

He says it's a girl

Remus agrees

Tonks isn't sure yet

Now with her belly, Tonks and Remus started bathing and not showering together anymore

He would lean against the bath and she would lean against his chest

And they would put their hands on Tonks' belly

Remus kisses her shoulder and neck

Keeps repeating 'thank you' and 'I love you' i her ear

And she does the same

Remus makes breakfast every morning

Teddy and Dora watch him

All three of them talk about the baby

Again, Remus and Teddy think it's a girl and Tonks thinks it's another boy

For names they picked Lyall for a boy and Hope for a girl

Remus did suggest they name their daughter Nymphadora

Tonks obviously smacked his head

They also fought a lot

Usually about Tonks doing housework while pregnant

She couldn't go out of bed or else Remus would freak out

Remus still had Zoom class

That's when Tonks got out of bed because he couldn't get mad when he's teaching

Teddy actually had no idea why they were inside all the time

But the loved spending time with his parents

He also loved to cuddle with them on their bed

And dad read him stories

And mum loved tickling him

And soon (more like about 5 months later) quarantine was over

Tonks was really big already

But she still went to work

Much to Remus' bemusement

Teddy was happy he got to play with his friends again

Remus went to Hogwarts again

But the returned home every night

When he announced to his fellow staff that his wife's pregnant, they all gave 5 galleons to McGonagall

She said she knew it was going to happen sooner or later

Kingsley was also very happy about them

Teddy was very popular in Hogwarts

So Remus had to bring him to work

He let him wander around the classroom

And sometimes he wanted his dad to hold him

So Remus just picked him up and put him on his hip

And started teaching as normal

Everyone was looking only at Teddy again

At the end of the day, they went home to mummy

And she was relieved to see her boys

And they were happy :)

(Please excuse me writing in both past and present tense :))

#that was a lot of headcanons #remadora #remus lupin #nymphadora tonks #remus x nymphadora #remus x tonks #nymphadora lupin #teddy lupin #moony and dora #moony x dora #ronks

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baroquebucky · 5 years ago

Text

Italian days

request: could you write something about going to Italy with timothee? Im just imagining how cute and romantic it would be 🥺

a/n: this is so cute !!! prepare for typical tourist attractions also i have no idea where any of these things are in relation to each other so :-) i literally googled what to do in these places bc I’ve never been sorry guys:-( this ones long so strap in and get ready !!! let me know what y’all think abt it ! i kinda wanna make headcanons about this too hehe >:) I hope you all enjoy it and send me some requests 🥰

You quickly finished packing your last t shirt in the already full suitcase, putting your weight onto it so that you could zip it up fully. You were excited for the trip that timothee had planned for the two of you, giddy to finally spend some alone time with you favorite boy. “ma cherie are you almost done?” you heard timmy call out from the living room. Quickly you grabbed the final bag off the bed and scanned the room, going over a mental checklist to ensure you didn't forget anything.

“okay i have everything, did you get everything? Do you have all the things you need? What time is it? Are we gonna be late? Oh god what if the plane leaves without us” you began to ramble, going through every worst case scenario possible. Timothee looked at you in awe, he had never seen you this nervous about anything before, he least expected it to come out right before a romantic getaway.

“angel, calm down, it’s fine let’s go to the airport we’re right on time” he smiled at you, giving you a quick kiss before he helped you with your bags and you two headed to the Uber waiting outside your shared apartment. As you helped him squeeze the luggage in you both sat in the backseat, you were so excited for the trip.

“You know we should go to Paris for our next anniversary” timmy spoke offhandedly, mindlessly playing with your hair as the movie you had chose played on the tv. “That would be fun, I’ve never been there” you smiled, looking at him briefly before your eyes settled on the screen again.

“where have you traveled to?” He questioned, curious as to all the places you’ve visited. “mmm i mean I’ve never been to Europe, i left the state a couple times for road trips but that’s about it” you replied, not thinking anything of the question. “You mean to tell me that you’ve never been to Italy?” He gasped and you laughed at his shock.

“We aren’t all stars or rich Chalamet” you suppressed laughter but one look at his facial expression caused you to burst into a fit of laughter. “That’s it im booking a flight to Italy, we can go to venice and oh we could even travel to where we filmed call me by your name! And then we could go to Rome!” He gushed, moving quickly to get his laptop.

You were excited, until you realized you had $20 in your wallet and maybe $67 in you bank account. “Timothée wait no” you spoke, rushing behind him to stop him. He turned around confused as to why you didn’t want to go.

“do you not wanna go? I thought you liked Italy? You show me videos about people going there all the time” he asked, searching your face for an answer. “I do! I’ve always wanted to go there” you stated, sighing as your gazes met. “it’s just- how am i gonna pay for my ticket? I don’t have enough money and-” before you could finish timothée cut you off.

“what makes you think you’re paying?” He grinned, running to the room to get the laptop once again. You messed with your fingers for a second, you didn’t want him to spend money on you, you’ve always felt bad about it.

“timmy no you can’t just buy me a ticket there” you spoke, walking into the room, seeing the boy sitting on the bed, legs crossed with the laptop in his lap. He furrowed his brows and replied without looking up from his screen. “Why not? You’re my girl, think of it as a present” he smiled, you opened your mouth to protest but he quickly stopped you.

“i just bought them so you can’t take it back” he beamed, you frowned for a second before he gave you the puppy eyes. Of course you couldn’t resist, you tackled him with a hug and kissed him, thanking him a million times.

And so here the two of you were, sitting in the backseat on your way to the airport, going over the loose itinerary timothée had made for the two of you once you landedin Venice. He had gone beyond what you expected to make this trip memorable despite telling him to not worry.

When you got to the airport everything went surprisingly smooth despite you being nervous the whole time. The two of you bought breakfast and ate it in the little food court, then headed to the gate which your plane would be in and played games while waiting to board.

Once the plane arrived the two of you got on, of course he had bought first class, you wanted to scold him for spending so much but as soon as you saw how excited he was you couldn’t be mad at him. “look! we get pillows and everything” he giggled, you smiled at him and nodded, equally as excited as him. The two of you ended up watching two movies, falling asleep during the second one.

You woke up first, smiling at the sight of timmy with messy hair, mouth slightly parted and cheeks lightly flushed as he slept. You decided to wait on waking him up, instead you occupied yourself by looking out the window and listening to your music.

The landing woke timothée up and he smiled at you brightly, it took him a couple minutes to really wake up, mumbling incoherently before he came fully to his senses.

As soon as you got off the plane you were excited, pulling timothée along to get out of the airport as soon as possible. When you finally got everything and exited you got into the car timothée had ordered for the two of you and headed to the hotel to unpack.

Timothée posted a picture of you staring out the window in awe onto his Instagram story, “she’s excited right now, just wait until she sees the canals” he wrote, smiling as he thought of all the pictures the two of you would take.

You expected an average hotel room, if timothée really splurged then maybe above average, you did not expect to get the presidential suite at a five star hotel. The smile on your face made everything worth it to timothée, he made sure this trip would be memorable. “Timothée Hal Chalamet! How much did you fucking spend!” You squeaked, rushing around the room to check everything on.

“That doesn’t matter, what matters is that you get changed and get ready, we’re in Venice for two days before our next stop and I have so much for us to do” he smiled, pulling you in for a kiss which you quickly returned. Resting your head on his chest you sighed, taking a Monet to let everything sink in. You’re in Italy with the love of your life. Holy shit.

Timothée had bought multiple disposable cameras for the two of you to use, wanting to develop all of them by the time you guys got back home.

Before you knew it you were wandering the streets of Venice, a permanent smile on your face as you took so many photos of the scenery and of timothée and of course together. The two of you visited the top tourist spots like Saint Marks Basilica, the both of you in awe of its beauty and laughing until your stomach hurt feeding the pidgeons.

Timothée was scared for his life when a pidgeon landed on his shoulder, immediately going stiff and begging for you to help him. You quickly pulled out your phone, recording him and zooming into his face, a face of pure fear. After you posted it you quickly shooed the pidgeon away, holding his hand and a small pidgeon landed on your shoulder and you fed it out of your free hand.

You smiled brightly at timothée who had moved away from you slightly causing you to giggle. “You laugh now but I’m gonna be the one poop free, those things are ruthless” he stated, a serious look on his face which quickly turned soft as you attempted to pet the bird on you. “Look at him he’s so cute!” You gushed, drowning as it flew away.

“Cmon sweet girl, we have a ride to catch, in the canal” he winked and you gasped, pulling him before you stopped, realizing you didn’t know where you were even going.

When the two of you arrived he helped you into the boat, it was only the two of you and the one driving the small boat, you were sitting next to each other, pointing at everything, a constant smile on both of your faces. He held your hand the whole time, most of the time looking at you rather than the sights you were in such awe of. A small smile on his face as he admired how beautiful you looked, you looked so stress free and happy and he knew everything else he had planned was so worth it if he got to see you like this.

After the ride on the canals the two of you ate at a small little restaurant, drinking some wine and talking about the days events.

“I just think it’s funny that you were that scared of the pidgeons” you giggled, and he frowned at you, “i wasn’t scared, i was just- cautious” he smirked, watching you roll your eyes at his remark.

The two of you finished dinner, walking around the now calmer streets, admiring everything at night for about an hour, kissing under streetlights and chasing one another through the streets, laughter bouncing off the buildings.

The two of you showered once you got back to the hotel and absolutely crashed after you had snuggled under the sheets. The two of you exhausted from the plane ride and walking everywhere all day.

You both woke up late in the morning to the sound of timothées alarm, you yawned, burying yourself more into timothées side, wanting ten more minutes. “Wake up mon amour i still have some stuff planned for today before we leave for Florence” he spoke softly into your hair, kissing the top of your head. He had decided to skip on taking you to Crema, deciding it would make for a good excuse to come back.

You woke up slowly, getting ready and waiting for timothée on the bed once you had finished. You were starving but you didn’t want to eat without him. You laid on your stomach and dozed off only to wake up to a now fully dressed timothée, smiling at you and kissing your nose. “let’s go eat and then we can head out” he whispered and you nodded, getting up from the bed and following him out the door.

The two of you spent the day walking around and seeing anything else you wanted, eating much too much food and buying way too many souvenirs. The day seemed to fly by and before you knew it you were headed to Florence, of course shoving all your luggage into the bus that the two of you were taking to the wonderful city. You slept most of the way while timothée read through a script for a new movie. He woke you up gently when you guys arrived, piling out along with everyone else as the two of you found the car timothée had ordered for this city, heading to yet another 5 star hotel with an amazing room.

It was late at night so the two of you only slipped into bed and set an alarm for later tomorrow morning, cuddling through the whole night, waking up once to eat some of the fruit that the hotel had given to the two of you as a gift.

The next morning the alarm went off and you quickly turned it off, placing your head on timothées chest, a smile on your face while he played with your hair.

“let’s get ready, i have something special planned, wear that one outfit you brought, you know the one that you said you’ve always wanted to wear?” He smiled, a mischievous glint in your eye. You gave him a kiss on the cheek and nodded, going to get ready.

After you finished you scrolled through your phone, replying to people and sifting through the pictures from Venice, deleting the ones which turned out bad or way too blurry. You decided to lay on your side, thinking you wouldn’t fall back asleep but you were wrong. Before you knew it you felt a gentle nudge.

“Cmon sleeping beauty i have a picnic for us” he beamed, a twinkle in his eye. You woke up quickly, a giant grin on your face as your mouth fell open. “A picnic? Oh my god this is a dream, angel you’re so amazing oh my god! I love you so much” You gushed, tackling timothée once you got off the bed and hugging him tightly, kissing him all over his face.

“i love you more ma cherie, now lets go” he smiled, opening the door for you and quickly taking your hand while walking down the halls.

You had ended up accidentally falling asleep in the car, head on timothées shoulder, he recorded you, saving it but not posting it, knowing if he did you would get him back and start a full fledged war.

As the car approached the Piazzle Michaelangelo he shook you softly, your eyes fluttered open and a small smile overtook your features. “Oh my god it’s so pretty” you gasped as the two of you stepped out of the car and onto the concrete floor, he got the picnic basket from the car as you went to save a spot on the steps. He quickly found you and opened the basket between the two of you, eating the food and making conversation, laughing and enjoying the fact that both of you were in Italy, overlooking Florence.

After sitting there for a while, cuddling and pointing things out the two of you drove into the city, excited to see everything the city had to offer. The two of you walked down the streets hand in hand, taking pictures once more and in awe of the beauty the city offered.

Of course the two of you drove all over the city visiting museums, seeing all the statues and artworks you had always admired through your phone screen. You almost wanted to cry of happiness seeing everything in person, you walked quickly in the museums, timothée barely keeping up with you as you rushed everywhere, making sure you absorbed every last detail.

Of course timothée took the typical you looking at art picture, and of course he posted it and captioned it “art looking at art” causing his fans to go feral, everyone tweeting and posting about how cute the two of you were. You held timmys hand when you realized he was dragging behind, pulling him along and forcing him to move at your speed.

“oh my god I love this painting, look at the brushstrokes! I read once that when he was painting this-” you began, going into detail about said artists life. Timothée stared at you, his chest swelling with love, a smile on his face as you went on and on about the paintings, he hung onto every word you said, loving the way your eyes lit up and the amount of emotion in your voice as you spoke of what you loved.

After you had visited the museums l, the two of you walked all over the city, taking in the culture and also taking many breaks and calling a cab to go to places he had planned to take you. Of course he set up a reservation at a fancy restaurant, eating to your hearts delight and drinking amazing wine, overseeing the bustling city as the sun set.

“i cannot believe we’re in Florence Italy” you sighed happily, looking out at the city while you sipped on your wine, timothée smiled at you. “I don’t know how I’m ever going to thank you enough angel, you really made my dreams come true�� you spoke, turning towards your curly headed boyfriend and he shook his head.

“you don’t have to thank me ma cherie. I love seeing you happy, you deserve the world and I’m going to give everything i can to you, you’ve always supported me through anything and everything, you know me so well, i just love you so much” he answered. “but- you can thank me by letting me post a bunch of pictures of you everywhere” he smiled shyly, blushing slightly. You smiled brightly at him, your love for him growing. “oh baby of course” you giggled.

The next day was just as action packed, going to multiple cathedrals and basilicas which you hadn’t gotten to the day before, and then spending time in the gardens, taking so many pictures of each other, half of them turning out blurry because the two of you couldn’t stop laughing.

He held you hand the whole time, keeping you close to him the whole time, kissing you at times and always looking at you with so much love. All over Twitter and Instagram were pictures of the two of you holding hands and laughing, many of them with one of the two of you pointing at something, many of the ones with you pointing had timothée looking at you with a smile rather than what you were showing him, it gave you butterflies.

That night you headed to the hotel early, packing everything to catch the late night flight to Rome, the last destination on the trip. The two of you packed quickly, racing to see who would finish first. This made timothée sneak up behind you and unfold your tshirts, run back to his area and rush to finish, an attempt to beat you. You were one step ahead, you had hidden his shampoo so you had no problem re folding while he ran around everywhere.

“I’m done!” You announced proudly, smiling at your boyfriend and he rolled his eyes, a pout on his face. “That’s not fair! I finished before you i just lost my shampoo” he responded, you smirked at him. “Check under your pillow” his eyes went wide and raced to get it, jaw dropping when he found it. “y/n i swear one day im gonna beat you at these competitions” he huffed, pushing you playfully and you shoved him back laughing.

The two of you cuddled the whole time in the airport, attached to the hip, and napping until your flight boarded, where the two of you also slept the whole time. When you finally arrived in Rome, you both headed to the hotel, knocking out there too, excited for the next two days in Rome before returning home. The two of you only had two cameras left, it filled you with excitement to get the photos developed, knowing you would have so many pictures of him to post and an endless amount of wallapapers.

When the two of you awoke the next morning you headed out quickly, excited to spend yet another day together.

“timothée oh my god look at that dog! Do you think he speaks Italian?” You questioned, smiling at the small dog that walked past the two of you. “I’m sure he does my angel” he replied, laughing. Pulling you along the busy street, putting his arm around your waist.

The two of you marveled at the colosseum, mind running wild at the thought of people using it. “You think they ever had a concert in there?” You asked your boyfriend who giggled, “im not so sure they did my angel” you thought about someone using it today. “What if someone tried to have on in there today” you smiled and timothée quickly replied, “as soon as the speakers start blasting everything would just crumble” you laughed at the thought of someone wanting to have fun only to ruin one of the most iconic pieces of history.

The two of you walked along the streets, holding hands and swinging them back and forth, debating where to go next. “How about the pantheon?” You suggested and he nodded with a smile, “you read my mind darling.”

The two of you got there surprisingly quickly and sat down for a second, both of your guys’ feet hurting. You put your head on timmys shoulder, closing your eyes for a second, you could hear everyone talking, the sound of cars and the wind. “Are you tired mon amour?” Timothée asked, not wanting to tire you out so much, he wanted you excited and happy not tired.

“just a bit, but I’m sure it’ll leave as soon as we see the Vatican” you spoke, a smile forming on your face as you opened your eyes and looked at the brunette next to you. He kissed your cheek, getting up and extending a hand to help you up. “Let’s go see what all those shops we passed have had to offer later yeah?” He grinned and you nodded, stretching a little before falling into step with him.

The two of you arrived at the Vatican and you swear you had never felt more in awe than staring at everything inside, everything was so adorned and beautiful, even the pillars on the outside when the two of you were waiting (only for like 5 minutes) made you smile in amazement. Timothée and you kept pointing out everything, a smile on both of your faces. Both of your cheeks hurt from smiling so much but neither of you complained, too happy to care.

After the two of you walked around for a bit more you left and entered the busy streets of Rome once again, taking pictures of each other all the time and stopping to look at anything and everything. “Let’s go get something to eat” you suggested. “Oh yeah I’m starving after all that walking” he replied, pulling out his phone to find a nice place to get food.

Soon enough he found a nice spot and the two of you arrived there quickly, excited to eat. After ordering and eating the two of you sat in comfortable silence, taking the time to wind down before going back out. “can we go to the Trevi Fountain? I brought coins for us to throw in” you asked and timothée wanted to kiss you all over and hug you and never let you go because god you were so fucking cute.

“of course we can go mon amour, are you ready to go right now?” He asked and you nodded, he paid quickly before taking his hand in yours, the two of you walking slower than before, you were leaning on him slightly, he was talking about some story that had happened to him in high school. You don’t remember exactly how the story had come up but you were grateful that it had.

As the two of you continued walking hand in hand and smiling at the sights you realized that no one had disturbed the two of you this whole trip which was very surprising, but you were grateful that his fans were respectful of the two of you. “okay i told you am embarrassing story of me in high school you tell me one” he pushed and you groaned, stealing the water bottle from his hands and gulping down the drink.

“i wasn’t really embarrassing in high school, i had like five friends and we always looked out for one another, middle school i was the biggest emo alive” you shuddered thinking back to all the diary entries you had made. “I remember i wrote this one poem that was so cringe and i thought it was the best thing ever written” you cringed at the memory and he bursted our laughing, leaning into you as he did so.

“Do you still have said diary?” He questioned, a mischievous smile forming on his face, “back at my parents house yeah” you replied, narrowing your eyes at him, “but you will never lay your eyes on a single one of those pages Hal” you sternly replied, smiling as he rolled his eyes and pulled you closer to him, putting his arm around you. “We’ll see about that one” he smiled.

“oh my god! Timmy there it is!” You shrieked, energy suddenly overflowing as you ran, pulling timothee with you causing him to almost trip over his feet. You pushed through the crowd, saying excuse me and sorrys until you got the the front of the fountain. Timothée arrived a couple seconds after you, out of breath and amazed at how fast you had ran.

“ma cherie you need to slow down” he spoke, leaning over to catch him breath. You stared at the fountain in awe, a smile sprawled across you face, taking in the beauty of it all. “I can’t believe I’m really here” you whispered, timothée got up, wrapping both his arms around your waist. “Believe in my love” he smiled, kissing you on the cheek.

Suddenly you heard a crack of thunder and soon enough rain started pouring, the once crowded area was now close to empty as everyone ran for shelter, you and timothée didn’t budge, mainly because you didn’t even flinch and refused to move.

you turned to timothée, hair sticking to both of your foreheads a wild smile on your face as you dig into your pocket, looking for the coins you had brought. Quickly you handed one to timothée. “Ready?” You smiled and he nodded. “Okay, 1, 2, 3!” You shouted, the coins flipping into the water at the same time. Turning to timothée you found him smiling at you and you laughed.

“When in Rome” you said before bunching his shirt into your fist and pulling him into a kiss, you eyes shutting as rain fell around the two of you. The kiss was what you imagined the movie ones were like, passionate and loving. You smiled into the kiss before you opened your eyes and pulled away.

“you drive me crazy y/n” he whispered, a giant smile on his face as you wiped away the water from your eyes and pushed the hair out of your face. “Should we get out of the rain?” You giggled and he nodded, “probably, we don’t wanna get sick” he joked and you punched him. “Don’t fucking jinx it!” You yelled, running to the nearest shelter you could find, which so happened to be a tourist shop.

Shopping with timothée was always fun, shopping with timothée in another country was another level. He wanted to buy you everything you looked at, he would buy you at $50 shirt if you really wanted it. The two of you were dripping wet and needed to buy new clothes or else you would definitely get sick. You ended up wearing tacky tourist shirts, getting matching ones of course and buying souvenirs for everyone back home as well as a few things to decorate and to keep for yourselves.

Considering how hard it was pouring and the fact that the two of you now had wet socks you decide to call it a day and go back to the hotel room, not wanting to get sick considering tomorrow was the last day. You were glad that it was already 5 pm, you wouldn’t have missed that much that you had planned and you could easilh get to them tomorrow.

You guys quickly got into a car and made your way back to the hotel, opting on showering together. As the two of you stepped in you let out a sigh at the feeling of the warm water. You let the water rinse the two of you off before shutting it off and getting timothées shampoo, telling him to turn around so you could wash his hair.

“thank you for this whole trip baby, it’s really been a dream come true” you spoke, massaging the shampoo into his hair. “Im sorry that it rained sweetheart, i really wanted us to be able to do everything because this was supposed to be perfect and-” you frowned at him despite his back being to you. “Timothée you can’t control the weather! And even then this trip is already perfect because I’m here with you. I’m in Italy with the love of my life dammit, ive drank so much good wine and eaten even more good food! We haven’t gotten this much time alone in god knows how long, you’ve literally had a chauffeur in every city so that we didn’t have to worry about parking and you made us an itinerary! Everything about this trip has been perfect, even the hiccups in the road.” You stated, smiling at the memories the two of you had already made.

You turned the water back on to rinse the shampoo out of his hair and he smiled at you, kissing you on the forehead. “And plus, i finally got my kiss in the rain AND it was infront of the trevi fountain, how am i supposed to complain again ever?” You smiled up at him, he laughed and quickly closed his eyes as shampoo rinsed from his hair. He grabbed your shampoo and began to wash your hair, you relaxed at his touch and closed your eyes.

“I love you so much angel, you don’t even understand” he whispered, you hummed in response. He gave you a soft kiss to your neck, giving you goosebumps.

Soon enough you guys hopped out of the shower, warm and clean and changed into some pijamas, snuggling into bed and looking out of the giant window next to you. Between the sound of the rain hitting the window and timothées soft breathing, you quickly dozed off, not caring that it was only 6:30 pm and you’d probably wake up at 2 am with an insane amount of energy. Timothée asked you something,confused as to why you weren’t replying until he looked at you, a bashful smile on his face when he saw you sleeping.

“you know i love you so much, you mean the world to me mon amour, there isn’t anything i wouldn’t do for you” he whispered, brushing your hair lightly to get it out of your face. He placed a gentle kiss on your forehead, turning the lights off in the room before closing his eyes and drifting off the sleep alongside you.

You ended up not even waking up throughout the night, instead sleeping until early the next morning. You hadn’t realized how tired you had been until now since you were more energetic than ever, excited to get as much in on the last day.

Timothée was the one dragging you around everywhere today, determined to get through the list had made, you smiled at him as he explained everything to you, surprised at how much he knew. “When did you make this list anyway?” You asked over lunch, looking up at him after you chewed your food. “I woke up at 2am and i couldn’t sleep but i didn’t wanna wake you up so i made this list and researched everything so i can give you the full tour guide experience” he replied, a giant smile on his face as you gawked at him.

“yeah that’s it, I’m gonna marry you” you shrugged, continuing to eat as timothée blushed and kept eating. The conversation flowing easily between the two of you and a comfortable silence falling into place at times.

The day continued quickly, visiting many more sites and before you knew it your disposable camera came to an end, and 30 minutes later so did timothées as the sunset. The two of you sat down on a bench, waiting on your guys’ driver to arrive so the two of you could pack up and head home.

“i can’t believe it’s over” you smiled softly, sad that it was over but happy that it happened. “Don’t worry mon amour im sure we’ll be back soon enough” he smiled and you put your head on his shoulder. “I love you with everything I have timothée” you spoke, looking up at him from your position. He kissed your forehead gently, “i love you so much more y/n” he smiled.

The two of you once again raced to pack up, you purposefully ‘lost’ your favorite shirt and let him win, although he would always hold it against you, it didn’t matter because you would lose over and over and over again if it meant seeing the amount of joy on his face when he shouted “IM DONE” and looked over at you with an unzipped suitcase.

As the two of you were waiting at the airport gate you had to make the obligatory Instagram post, gathering pictures of the two of you together and of yourself to post, you smiled as you picked out the photos. Searching the internet to see if anyone had caught the two of you kissing in the rain in front of the fountain, which of course they had. You looked over at a napping timothée, smiling as you set the photo as your lockscreen and added it to your post, quickly you typed out your caption.

“Italian days <3”

#timothee chalamet imagine #timothee chalamet x reader #timothee fluff #timothee chalamet fluff #timothee imagine #timothee blurb #timothee x reader #timothée chalamet fluff #timothée chalamet imagine #timothée x reader #timothée fanfic #timothée chalamet fanfic #timothee fanfic #timothée fluff

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thiswasinevitableid · 4 years ago

Note

Have you seen the post going around about the zoom class with one guy and his full streamer setup vs the guy whose just in the middle of the woods? I know you have a prompt list rn but I’m just saying there’s a sternclay fic in there somewhere...

It is! Here you go!

Life is better with order. Or, at the very least, with some attempt at patterns, organization, or consistency.

Which is why Stern has carefully arranged his desk, his chair, and his equipment in the background. Streaming as a hobby and a side hustle means he has some (okay, a lot) of practice making his digital self look just right. He needs to make a good impression on the first day of the semester.

Unlike some people.

“Holy shit man, are you in the woods?” Duck, the guy in a “Monongahela National Forest” shirt, grins as he asks this of another student whose screen consists of a forest clearing, a log, and the name “Barclay.”

“Yeah. Hang on, lemme finish getting the phone balanced.”

“Dude, that’s like, way better than my background” this comes from Jake, in front of a poorly rendered half-pipe.

“Can’t really take credit for it, just where I ended up.” Barclay sits down, and Stern gets his first look at a man so tall he barely fits in the frame, with a short, coppery beard and an honest-to-god man-bun.

Damn west coast schools.

“How is your battery going to last long enough for class?” Stern leans back in his chair, certain Barclay will have “battery trouble” halfway through as an excuse to cut out early.

Barclay smiles, lifting up a small green and black rectangle, “solar battery. Not everyone needs fancy gadgets for school.” He aims a pointed stare at Sterns set-up.

“It’s important to have the right equipment.”

“Whatever you say, man.” He lifts a cup of iced coffee into the frame, sipping it through a straw. It’s the picture of relaxation, as if nothing is wrong in the world. As if this is all totally normal.

Stern wants to reach through the screen and slap some sense into him. Preferably while he’s shirtless.

He chalks that thought up to not having gotten laid since last December and pulls up his note taking software as Professor Chicane enters the room.

------------------------------------

Private Chat 9/20/20

Duck (he/him): I timed it, we’re already at ten minutes of arguing.

Indrid (he/him): I know Ned enjoys their demonstrating the different modes of rhetoric, but this is a bit extreme.

Duck: To be fair, Joe does seem kinda uptight.

Indrid: Yes, but Barclay should know by now that zeroing in on him during our practice debates only results in this.

Duck: Yeah. Oh shit, are they for real wrapping up you think?

Indrid: We can only hope. Skype me tonight?

Duck: Of course, sugar.

--------------------------------------

What is Joseph’s problem? He’s got a set-up that would make a pro-vlogger jealous, what looks to be a well-lit apartment with some houseplants and the kind of coffee-cups that are weirdly lacking in personality. His clothes are immaculate, his hair slicked back as if he;s in a business meeting rather than an online class in the midst of a chaotic world. So why is he acting like everything is terrible? And why is he always arguing with Barclay, when there are plenty of other people in the class to disagree with?

“Now” Mr. Chicane’s voice booms through the tiny speaker on his phone, “if you all had a chance to read over the instructions, we will begin the first mock debate. Do we have any volunteers?”

He and Joe raise their hands at the same time. Mr. Chicane raises an eyebrow.

“While I appreciate your eagerness, gentlemen, I would like two other volunteers this time.”

That’s fine by him. It’s not like he likes listening to Joseph get all wound up and passionate, making everyone on the call sit up and take notice of him. It’s not as if he enjoys being the center of his focus.

Nope, not at all.

-----------------------------

Private chat 10/11/20

Jake (he/him): Dudes, did you see who got paired up on the final project?

Aubrey (she/her): Chicane must be getting them back for all the times they’ve hijacked discussions.

Duck (he/him): Man, for their sake I hope it works out.

Indrid (he/him): This is going to be a disaster.

--------------------------------------

“Are you out of your mind!” Stern is talking before Barclay’s video is fully on.

“Nope. And you don’t have to yell, my speaker works just fine.”

“You’re outside, for all I know there’s a ton of ambient noise.”

Barclay, phone obviously in his hand as he walks through the trees, groans.

“And don’t try to derail this; how can you possibly suggest I come out there so we can do the project in person? We’re supposed to be limiting travel and gatherings.”

“Look, Joseph, we both agree that trying to generate our own cryptid hoax is the best way to demonstrate all the techniques Ned wants us too, right?”

“Yes” he hides his answer behind the rim of his coffee mug.

“We’ll do a way better job if we work in the same space. And if it makes you feel any better, I haven’t had any human contact in three weeks; all quarantined up, unlike whatever you’ve been doing in the city.”

He sets the mug down with a thunk, “I haven’t been out in a month. And before that was only for one grocery run and a hospital visit.”

“Uhhh-”

“I cut my hand cooking. So. Yeah.”

Literal crickets chirp, courtesy of Barclay’s end of the line, as the silence stretches on.

“If it helps, it’s real easy to stay isolated here, and I’ve still got utilities and everything.”

“And you’re not subsisting only on MREs or granola or something?”

A deep chuckle, the kind that makes his skin prickle, “Nope. That much I can promise.”

Stern glances around the studio apartment, clean and empty.

“What’s your address?”

------------------------------------

Look, all Stern is going to say is that he’s seen and read plenty of stories that start with a cabin in the woods and none of them end well. Which is why he’s still sitting in his car, parked beside a beat-up Subaru, rather than knocking on the door.

Breathe in, five counts. Out for four. Repeat four times.

Waiting for him on the door is a note.

Joseph,

Key under mat, make yourself at home.

Barclay.

He brings in his bags (a matching set of three, a gift from his aunt last year), placing them in the tiny guest room. It’s not much more than a bed, a dresser, and a tiny table. But there’s a heating unit below the window looking out into the woods, which is pretty pleasant. He’ll be keeping the blinds closed at night, though; he hates the thought of something being able to look in.

Stern’s busy evaluating the laundry closet when the front door opens.

“Hey, glad you found the place okay.”

Barclay stands in the doorway, a basket full of fruit in one hand. He’s remarkably kempt for a man living in the woods and that, combined with the deep voice being even richer in person and the fact Stern has to actually look up to meet his eyes, has him stumbling for words.

“Your directions were very thorough. Thank you. Um. I put my things in there, should I, um-”

“I can give you the grand tour.” The taller man sets the basket on the dining table, notices Sterns puzzled expression “there’s a piece of property about a mile thataway that has orchards they don’t really use. They let me come and pick whenever i want, less for them to clean up.”

Barclay keeps up a steady monologue as he shows him the cabin. The lower level is the living room and dining area, a kitchen which leads onto the back deck, Sterns room, and a bathroom. As the cabin is A-frame, the upstairs is Barclay’s room, all dark wood and pine colored plaid. It’s as Barclay is telling him about the woodpecker that sometimes nests in the eaves that he realizes why he’s talking so much.

He’s nervous.

Neither of their nerves improve when he gets to his last point of order.

“Uh, so, the bathroom downstairs is only a half-bath.”

“So...if I want to shower, which I do, I have to come up here.”

“Yeah.” Barclay scratches the back of his neck, “sorry. I don’t, like, sleep naked or anything so we should be fine.”

“Disappointing.” Stern sighs, only to sail past sarcastic and land face first in sincere.

Barclay blushes, then shrugs, “Trust me, after the first night, you’ll see why.”

Stern does. He’s warm as long as he’s in bed, but the moment he ventures into the bathroom in the middle of the night he’s cocooned in cold.

The morning brings cinnamon and coffee on the draft coming under the door. He plods into the kitchen in search of caffeine, finds Barclay in an pron, the counter covered in trays of dough.��

“Morning!”

“Morning. Coffee-”

“Right there, sugar and stuff’s in the cabinet above it, cream and such is in the fridge.”

Blessedly, there’s heavy cream to be found, and soon he’s sipping from an enamel mug emblazoned with a UFO made of veggies.

“Is this all for your job?” Barclay mentioned he was a cook during an icebreaker.

“Yep. Way it works is I bust my ass baking once or twice a day, and Thacker, who works with Mama at the Lodge in town, comes and takes them over there. Normally I’d just be there but, well, y’know.”

“Everything is on fire? Figuratively, I mean.”

“Sometimes literally too, but yeah.”

As he’s turning to grab his clothes and head showerward, Barclay adds, “You a scone man, coffecake man, or a cinnamon roll man?”

“Coffeecake?” It comes out hesitant.

“There’s no right answer, man.” Barclay sounds amused, “what do you want?”

“Cake, definitely.”

“Cool. I’ll save you a slice.”

Once he’s showered and on the wi-fi, his day runs like normal; one lecture, reading, a research paper, his initial half of their project, and working either his copy-editing or transcription job in between, and planning his next stream. Barclay comes and goes, stops now and then to see if he needs anything, leaves a sandwich in front of him around dinner time. Then it’s time to crawl under the covers and dream of a less-stressful world.

The next day, just before one, Barclay taps him on the shoulder.

“Ready for class?”

“Yes…” He gestures to his laptop and notebook.

“C’mon, join me out here, it’s way nicer, and we can share the phone.”

“Barclay, it’s a nonsensical way to attend class, just stay in here with me! Even this set-up has to be better than the woods.”

“This set up. You mean my house?” All the friendliness leaves hi voice.

“Yes. Look, I agreed to come out because you’re right, if we want to ace this thing that’s worth sixty percent of our grade, this is the place to do it; I don’t have to go along with the whole self-sufficient woodsman aesthetic while I’m here. “

“Yeah, I’d say you’re pretty far from self-sufficient. See you in class.”

Stern stews through the entire session, but where he’d usually find something Barclay says to latch onto, he instead gnaws on himself. Why didn’t he just go with him? Why snap at someone who’s been nothing but nice since he got here?

Whatever the answer, how can he fix it?

---------------------------------------

Barclay tromps back through the twilight, done with his second class of the day. If Joseph is in the main house, he plans to ignore him until tomorrow morning. That all goes out the window with the clank of dishes from the kitchen.

Peering in reveals the other man bent over, pulling a casserole from the oven. He waits to announce his presence until Joseph is out of the danger zone, enjoying the view as he does.

“Smells good.”

Blue eyes flick over to him as Joseph opens drawers, “it’s mostly cheese and chips, so I’m not surprised.”

“Servers are in that one.”

“Thank you. Nacho pie?” He scoops some into a bowl, holding it out.

“Sure. Uh, look, Joseph I-”

Joseph holds up the server, “Wait. Before you apologize I, um, I wanted to say I’m sorry for my comments. And for being so...me-ish.” He sighs, staring at the utensil in his grip, “I’ve always been a little bit tense, tried to be polite and effective and friendly in spite of it. The last six months made that harder to do. I don’t love it when I can’t be organized, when normal systems go out of place. But that’s no excuse for being rude to you, even before you invited me here. You’re just so...you’re always so calm and relaxed, like nothing was wrong and I just honed in on that way more than made sense. I’m sorry.”

“If it makes you feel better, I kinda did the same thing. You’re always so put together, it looked like you had this organized life in the midst of this whole shitstorm. I feel lik everything is slipping away, like my world is just this cabin. I mean, I assumed you were seeing friends in the city, while I haven’t seen Mama in person since April. So” he sets the bowl down, rests his hand on Joseph’s shoulder, “I’m sorry too.”

Joseph laughs, softly, “turns out we both had failures of imagination, huh?”

“Yeah” he runs a hand over Joseph's back, “now come on, this dinner’s not gonna eat itself.”

-----------------------------------

“You sure you don’t wanna wear the bigfoot costume?”

“Positive. Besides, it suits you.” Joseph finishes styling the fur on the head of the costume to look more realistic, “I just hope we get this done before that storm comes in; as mush as the rain would add to the mood of the scene, that’ll be hell to dry and you’ll be miserable. So, go lurk over there while I finish up getting the camera settings where they need to be.”

“Yes sir” Barclay pops the head on, leaves crunching as moves to his appointed tree. He smiles as he watches Joseph fiddle with the camera; things have been so much better between them these last two weeks. They trade off cooking dinner, study side by side, and watch movies or play games in the warmth of the heater. They have a similar sense of humor and taste in books, and are tidy to boot. Joseph’s even come with him to listen to lectures in the woods, the pair sharing a thermos of coffee under the astonished gaze of their classmates. There’s just one problem.

Barclay’s buried crush is now blooming in every direction. Animated, argumentative Joseph was attractive. Joseph, in all his moods and mannerisms, is devastatingly enchanting. He’s come close to telling him this, but the other man is his guest and also only here for another two and a half weeks, so a confession is setting himself up for heartbreak at worst and awkwardness at best.

He almost blew it last night when they were washing dishes (Joseph scrubs, Barclay dries and puts away).

“Last one.”

“Thanks, blue eyes.”

“What was that?”

“Uh, blue eyes? Like a, uh, a nickname?”

Joseph laughs, “Sounds like something from a Raymond Chandler book. I like it.”

On the plus side, if Joseph thinks it’s just a nickname and not a pet name, maybe Barclay can keep using it.

“Are you ready?’

He sticks up a hairy thumb and calls, “you know it, blue eyes.”

That same laugh as Joseph takes up his position. Maybe it’s the weird film over the costume’s eyes, but Barclay swears he sees a blush.

-------------------------

Stern trawls through the search results. Their video is getting some traction, with two cryptid hunter sites claiming it’s credible footage. He’s making note of how the information spread, which threads lead to belief and which to doubt, when Barclay calls from upstairs.

“Joseph? Little help?”

The other man is in the bathroom, and when Stern knocks he says, “Think the pilot light on the water heater went out again, all I’m getting is cold water. Can you go relight it?”

“Sure.” He gets to the stairs then, stops, “where’s the key to that closet?”

“Huh? Oh, shit, right, hang on” Barclay says at the same time as Stern’s “don’t worry, I can find it.”

Which is why the instant he turns back into the bedroom is the same instant Barclay steps out of the bathroom, blue towel around his waist.

Any blood that doesn’t head south goes instantly to Stern’s cheeks.

“You okay there, blue-eyes?”

“It’s completely unfair how good you look without a shirt.”

He clamps a hand over his mouth.

“Idn’t ean to ay at out oud” The mumbled explanation makes Barclay smirk.

“You like this, should see what’s under the towel.”

The unusually bold statement from Barclay kindles his own confidence.

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep, big guy.”

“Who says I won’t.” Barclay sits down on the edge of the bed, nonchalant and leaning back on his hands, “got plenty of time to make good on them.”

“We literally don’t. I go back in a week and two days.”

Barclay toys with the lint on the towel, “you could stay. Through break, through next semester, for however long you wanted.”

“Do you mean that?”

A shy nod, “I like having you around, Joseph. Even beyond the huge fucking crush I have on you I...everything is a little better when you’re around.”

“I, um, I guess it could work. We know next semester is online too, and so is work, so…” there must be variables missing, something he’s not seeing, some reason this is too good to be true.

“You want some space away from shirtless me to think about it?”

“That’d be great.”

Barclay stands, hesitates, then plants a quick kiss on his forehead, “take all the time you need, blue eyes.”

------------------------------

Private Chat log 1/11/2021

Barclay (he/him): Did you see the look on Duck’s face when we turned up in frame together.

Joseph (he/him): Yes. Pretty sure Aubrey yelled something about him needing to pay up. I wonder what the bet was.

Barclay (he/him): Whatever it was, pretty sure I came out the biggest winner.

Stern snorts, trying not to blush on camera, and leans over to kiss his boyfriend on the cheek.

#agent stern/barclay #sternclay #taz amnesty #college AU

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slipping-through-my-fingertips · 4 years ago

Text

Could You Be My Little Quarantine?

AU: Mercedes has no excuse to not be zooming with Kurt right now and Blaine has the wrong Zoom ID.

AO3

A/N: This is a product of my late-night story ideas. I could see more from this 'verse developing but I'd need some ideas for what to write. If you have prompts please send them my way. I hope you all enjoy it!

Part 2 Part 3

***

2020

It wasn’t that Kurt isn’t happy for Mercedes. In all the years they’ve been best friends, they've always been supportive of one another. So, it was no surprise to Kurt that she was enjoying her two-week quarantine with her boyfriend. She didn’t flaunt her relationship around Kurt and she made just as much time for him as she always did and Kurt really appreciated it. It meant so much to see her occasionally pushing plans with her boyfriend in favor of talking to Kurt be it Zoom or a regular phone call. Sometimes, she’d cancel because of her recording schedule, which Kurt understood. When he had been rehearsing for a Broadway production of Moulin Rouge!, his schedule was ever-changing.

Tonight was different though because Mercedes had no excuse to cancel on Kurt. She was literally ordered to stay in her apartment. There were no recording sessions, no producers to meet with, and her boyfriend was basically living with her so Kurt’s a little frustrated to be left waiting on Zoom. He’ll give her 15 minutes before texting her. He's still using the college 15-minute rule. As in if the professor doesn’t show after 15 minutes, the class is free to leave. Except, in this case, Kurt was planning to text his friend until she responded.

Kurt did what he usually did while waiting. Played a new word in Scrabble against Carole and went through his recently saved photos (deleting the ones automatically saved from his Instagram Stories) before ultimately opening his fashion Twitter account and scrolling endlessly. He’ll periodically look at the time and note only a minute has passed since he last looked. Until someone who is definitely not Mercedes joins his Zoom meeting room and says hello.

“Hello,” Kurt says, putting his phone down.

“Um hi,” the other man replies. “You’re not Cooper.”

“And you’re not Mercedes.”

“No, I’m not. This is awkward.” He runs his hand through his black curls. “I’m so sorry. I should probably hop off and yell at my brother for giving me the wrong Zoom ID.”

“It’s no problem, my friend’s likely ditching me for her boyfriend. This was a nice surprise.”

“Is it?” he asks. “Cause I feel pretty embarrassed right now. What are the odds I typed an actual Zoom ID in?”

“Well, you were looking for your brother,” Kurt says. “I imagine it’s similar odds to dialing the wrong phone number.”

The man laughs. “You’re probably right. I’m Blaine by the way.”

“Kurt.”

“Wait, you aren’t…” Blaine trails off and leans closer to the camera like he’s trying to get a better look at Kurt. “You are,” he concludes. “Kurt Hummel?”

“Um yes?” Kurt winces at his voice cracking.

“I saw you twice on Broadway last year. You were outstanding as Christian. Moulin Rouge! is one of my favorite movies so when I heard it was going to Broadway, I knew I had to get tickets. Then, after I saw it the first time I didn’t shut up about how incredible it was so Coop brought me tickets again for my birthday, which ended up being much better seats than I could afford.”

“Oh, well thank you. It’s one of my favorite movies too. That’s why I auditioned in the first place but I was shocked to get the lead. I was told so often that a voice like mine didn’t get the romantic roles of the stage.”

“Are you kidding? They couldn’t have cast a better Christian! I saw you in Peter Pan too. Stunning performance.”

“You saw Peter Pan?” Kurt questions. “I performed that for a charity event at a nursing house like five years ago.”

“At my grandmother’s nursing home to be exact.” Kurt thought Blaine was turning a little red but maybe it was the lighting. “I’ve been following your career ever since. I hope Moulin Rogue! won’t be your last performance. It’d be a waste of talent.”

Kurt smiles. “I appreciate your support. I don’t intend to make it my last but I’m taking a short break from performing to get back into student mode. I’m finishing up my last semester of grad school at NYU.”

“I did my undergrad at NYU. Great professors,” Blaine comments. “I was actually supposed to be making my debut on the stage this summer but alas COVID-19 has shut us down for a bit.”

“Debut in what? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“David Mamet’s American Buffalo.”

“Let me guess, Bobby?”

“Yeah,” Blaine replies grinning.

“I’m sure it’ll be back up and running soon. I assume you still live in the city then?”

“I do. New York’s my real home. I always felt out of place in California. My mom moved us there after her divorce and Cooper got his first gig so we stuck around.”

“Gig? Like a band?” Kurt asks, wondering if Cooper ran in similar circles as his college friend, Elliott.

“No, like acting actually. Sorry, poor word choice on my part. He did credit-score commercials for a while but now he primarily does soap operas.”

“Wait, you mean your brother is Cooper Anderson?”

“Um yeah, he is,” Blaine admits.

“Now, it’s my turn to be embarrassed.” Kurt feels his face warm up. “I might’ve had the jingle to that credit-score commercials as my ringtone back in high school.”

“No, you did not!” Blaine exclaims, laughing a little.

“I’m afraid so,” Kurt tells him. “No offense but Cooper was every young gay teen’s fantasy in Ohio. And by every young gay teen, I mean myself because there was only one gay teen in Lima.”

“Kurt, I promise to never tell Cooper of this because his ego is already too large to handle however I will be holding this secret near and dear to my heart only to remember it fondly when I need a good laugh.”

“Oh hush.” Kurt bats his hand at the camera.

“So, what are you studying at NYU?”

This question led the two down a rabbit hole of their favorite classes and professors. Similar experiences they had during vocal performances and various laughter-inducing stories of their off-campus activities. Kurt’s friends’ weekly karaoke nights, Blaine’s goal to try every coffee shop in Greenwich Village, Kurt’s dream role to play Peter Allen in The Boy From Oz, and Blaine’s secret identity Nightbird, who made yearly appearances in October when Blaine went to sing-a-longs at local children’s hospitals.

“Sam learned the hard way that Gatorade hurts more coming out of your nose than chocolate milk does,” Blaine chuckles.

Kurt is about to jump in with another story but a third box shows up on their screens. It’s Mercedes.

“Kurt, I am so so sorry,” she says. “Oh, hello.”

“Hi,” Blaine waves. “Mercedes, I presume?”

“That’s me.”

The call goes silent for a moment.

“Mercedes, this is Blaine.” Blaine smiles. “You were apologizing…”

“Right,” she says, ignoring Blaine’s presence for a minute while she explains.

Meanwhile, Kurt is typing a chat to Blaine so Mercedes won’t see it.

Kurt: Lovely chatting with you tonight. I’d love to meet up again sometime.

Blaine: Me too. Text me.

Kurt quickly entered the number into his phone and nodded confirming that he was both listening to Mercedes and was agreeing to text Blaine.

“Apology accepted,” Kurt tells Mercedes once she’s finished.

She grins.

“Well, I don’t want to interrupt. Lovely to meet you both but I think I’ll try and call my brother now as I had originally planned.”

Blaine does a two-handed wave before leaving the meeting.

“You have a lotta explainin’ to do, mister,” Mercedes says. “Who was that cutie?”

Kurt sighs dreamily. “If all goes my way, a potential boyfriend.”

Mercedes claps excitedly and proceeds to pull all the information Kurt’s willing to divulge about Blaine Anderson.

#klaine fanfiction #klaine fanfic #glee #kurt hummel #blaine anderson #mercedes jones #my fics

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imagineaworlds · 4 years ago

Text

I Love You (Part Eleven) -- Aaron Hotchner

Written By: @desperately-bisexual

Request: None.

Warnings: Murder. Kidnapping. Literally everything Criminal Minds.

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Greenaway!Reader

Word Count: 11063

Timeline: Season 2 Episode 14. Right after part eight.

I guess I was somewhat relieved that Hotch and I let out some steam before going to the party, because his plans of what would come after had to come to a screeching halt when we were called into work for a case. Everyone was disappointed to be leaving so soon, but when the job called, we went. That was the deal. Always. So we all jumped in our cars and headed out to Quantico.

At the office, I went straight for the coffee pot and started to make a fresh brew. JJ, Garcia, and Morgan were all tipsy— if not drunk— and the best way to sober them up was coffee, food, and lots of water. So as I went to make the coffee, Morgan raided his secret stash of snacks, and Emily bought water bottles for everyone from the vending machine. By the time I got back to the boardroom with everyone’s drinks, Gideon was back from his night off and was sitting comfortably in his chair like he hadn’t left at all.

The team was all joking about Morgan’s dance moves, he was trying to deflect by pointing out yet again that Hotch and I were late to the party, and I deflected by asking where Gideon was. He told us that he had been at the Smithsonian with an old friend of his. I recalled Hotch mentioning something to me about Gideon going to D.C for the weekend, but I didn’t think he would just be lounging around in the Smithsonian all night. How the hell does one even go about doing that?

JJ stormed into the boardroom and brushed past me as I sat down next between Hotch and Morgan. She threw an image of a couple up on the TV for us and began to review the case for us. The Kyles had been killed in their Atlanta home shortly after the Super Bowl ended. They were at home, the TV turned on for the big game, until the Unsub broke into their home and killed them in their upstairs bedroom. The curious thing about this case, however, had to do with the police’s unusually fast response time. The Kyles were murdered during the game, and yet, the police got there before the halftime show even started. How?

“One of the Unsubs called the police from inside of the home to warn them that the other was about to murder the victims,” JJ explained. “According to the dispatcher, the first Unsub sounded terrified and was begging for the police’s help, while the other Unsub was telling him that it had to be done and he needed to hang up the phone.” She pressed a button on the TV remote and it pulled up a crime scene photo. “The second Unsub, identified as Raphael, was the one to kill the two victims. When the police arrived, both Unsubs were gone, but they had left this on the bed,” she pressed a button again. The TV showed us a zoomed in image of a bible page that the Unsubs had left at the crime scene. Yes, only one paragraph was specifically highlighted.

“Revelations Chapter 6, Verse 8,” Hotch said. “And I looked in behold a pale horse, and his name that sat upon him was Death, and Hell followed with him.”

“So they’re religiously motivated. Unsubs with a mission don’t usually stop their work after just one or two victims. They go on a spree that leaves a trail of blood in their wake,” I explained, turning away from the TV to get Reid’s back up on my statement.

He nodded. “Yeah, if these guys are using the bible as an excuse to murder, then they’re not going to stop until they think that they’ve cleared the world of all sinners. But sin is relative and fluid… So, technically, everyone’s a sinner.”

“That means they’re going to be looking for another victim and they’re going to kill them soon,” Morgan added.

Hotch picked up his copy of the case file, tapped it on the desk, sighed, and said, “Wheels up in thirty.”

We all let out quiet sighs. This was the job, though, right? It didn’t matter if we were ever promised time off, because the cases always had to come first. The Kyles were brutally murdered in their home while we were out having fun in a bar, and we were upset that we had to fly to Georgia? Something felt off about that to me… But I couldn’t shake the disappointment of not getting one more night alone with Hotch or even the chance to say goodbye to Jack before we would leave. All we could make time for was grabbing our go bags, changing in the bathrooms, then hopefully being able to call Haley on the plane and ask if we could talk to Jack. That was it. But at least we had that when the Kyles didn’t.

On the plane, before taking off, when I was sitting with Morgan in the back, Hotch came over to tell me that he had Jack on the phone. I excused myself to Morgan before going with Hotch over towards the cockpit where we were most likely to have enough privacy— Even though Gideon, Emily, and Spencer were already busy with looking over the case to spend time eavesdropping on me and Hotch.

“Hi, daddy,” Jack said over the phone.

“Hey, bud. Did you watch the game with mom?” Hotch asked.

“Yeah. We lost.”

“We sure did,” Hotch chuckled quietly. Jack didn’t know much about football. He was too young to know how the game was played or why certain things would happen, but he liked it because his dad liked it. “Listen, bud, we’re calling to tell you that we won’t be able to pick you up from school tomorrow. We’ve got to go save the world again.”

“Y/N can’t come get me?”

Hotch looked to me to respond, and I took the opportunity. “I’m sorry, little man, we’re both going to be gone.”

“Hotch, Garcia just sent the police call over,” JJ told us, taking a seat with Morgan on the couch as everyone huddled up.

We nodded in her direction to let her know we understood and that we were wrapping up our call with Jack. I leaned into Hotch slightly. “We’ll come see you when we get back, though, alright, little man?” I asked, squeezing Hotch’s shoulder. “We love you so much.”

“I love you, too,” Jack said.

“Hotch—” Morgan called.

I shooed my hand at him to tell him to be quiet for just another minute. Hotch hovered his thumb over the hang up button and told Jack “goodnight” and “I love you” one more time before hanging up and burying his phone in his pocket. Hotch and I took seats separate from one another, yet still ensuring that we could see the computer screen. Garcia was waiting patiently for us to appear on her screen before playing the 911 call for us.

The operator answered the call first with the script that she had likely repeated over a million times for various reasons. After her opening script line ended, the first Unsub began speaking. He was calm, yet the fluctuations in his voice revealed a panic or a worry of some kind, but he didn’t rush his words like he was trying to get the cops to show up any sooner than the four minute arrival time they ended up making. He never mentioned Raphael until the end of the call when he finally admitted that Raphael was going to kill the Kyles. When the operator asked for clarification, the second Unsub’s voice could be heard controlling the first Unsub, telling him that he needed to hang up the phone. The first Unsub tried to refuse, but Raphael lowered his voice and used a more demanding tone that ended up working, and the call ended.

I asked Garcia to play the call again and Gideon asked what had caught my attention. When I told him that I was unsure and needed to hear it again to get a better understanding, he gave Garcia the go ahead. I tried to focus on the first Unsub. I knew that the rest of the team was going to be more concerned about Raphael, as he was certainly the disorganized one of the two, but there was something odd about the Unsub’s behavior in comparison to his voice in the call.

The first Unsub was calling the police, which meant that he wanted to help the Kyles somehow. He was arguing with Raphael, but he wasn’t running away, seeking out help from the neighbors, or even trying to physically stop Raphael. If the Unsub felt that he was in danger with Raphael, it would have made sense to call 911, sure, but why not run away? That was the odd part. His physical and verbal reactions to the situation were total contradictions of one another. Was he being forced to be there? Well, if that were the case, then Raphael wouldn’t have given him the chance to call 911. And it sounded like Raphael was standing right there when the first Unsub called the police, so why didn’t he stop it sooner? Did he want the cops to come? Did he want us to come?

The only way I could put together the pieces was to try and make some kind of connection with these guys. They were a typical dominant and submissive pair— or at least they should have been typical, but this was a moment that their dynamic slipped. Why? With me and Hotch, I liked to push back in order to rile him up, to force him into the dominant mindset where he would practically force me into being submissive. That was part of the appeal, part of the fun. If the Unsubs were dominant and submissive personalities, it could have been possible that the first Unsub was calling the police in order to rile up Raphael somehow. Perhaps it was a sexual aspect of the murders. But there was no sign of sexual assault against either victim. So, then… why… Why fight against the dominant and grow submissive when he gets stern if not to please themselves?

When the replay of the call ended, they all looked to me for answers, but I still didn’t have any. My role as the one who could find the smallest of details and make a point of them was failing me in that moment. These Unsubs had warped my definition of a classic dominant and submissive relationship for psychopaths. In past cases, they were almost always the same, but these Unsubs didn’t fit the bill. Something wasn’t right with them. I needed to see the bodies to know more about Raphael in order to know more about the submissive Unsub, too.

Hotch got the idea before I could say anything, like he could read my mind or something. As he was giving everyone their assignments, he told me and Emily that we should head down to the morgue to talk with the coroner, and so that I could get a look at the bodies myself. Hotch told JJ to get more images of the victims and help sort out the victimology, and that Reid, Morgan, and Gideon were going to head to the crime scene to evaluate how Raphael managed to kill two people in under four minutes. When Morgan asked what Hotch would be doing, he answered that he’d be heading down to the police station to sort through old, unsolved cases because this wouldn’t be the first rodeo for a team like this with a very specific M.O and the ability to do it in four minutes.

It all sounded like a viable plan, and we all agreed to our assignments. JJ and Hotch sat together the rest of the flight to review victimology, while Gideon, Morgan, and Reid stayed at the large table to review the crime scene, and Emily and I sat together to look at photos of the victims. I managed to steal the laptop at one point, though, and listened to the 911 call repeatedly with headphones on. There had to be something else I was missing in there. I could sense it. And I just knew that if I gave it a little more time and attention, I would finally be able to put the pieces together.

At the morgue, Emily and I introduced ourselves to the coroner who had just completed whole autopsies on both victims. Emily asked for his professional opinion on what he saw while we were still talking in the hallway outside, but I asked if I could go in and take a look at the bodies for myself. The coroner shrugged and told me to go right ahead, knowing that it was probably just a waste of my time when he could just tell us everything we needed to know. But I just… I needed to see them for myself.

The coroner’s assistant was still cleaning up in the autopsy room when I walked in. Both victims were still laying on separate slabs, but they were covered with new, clean white sheets. The assistant acknowledged my entrance briefly before turning back to his work. I approached the bodies, starting with Mr. Kyle, and pulled away the sheet that was covering his body. The most obvious thing about him was the laceration on his throat, which was likely the cause of death. Looking down, his right arm had a gash running from his wrist to elbow, and his left leg had a similar cut from his crotch to just above the knee. All major arteries. All tactical. All precise. All straight, not jagged like you would expect from an unhinged Unsub like we presumed Raphael to be. Still, there were no bruises or scratches, either, which would have suggested that the first Unsub could have possibly held the victim down while Raphael cut him up. But there was no sign of a struggle. So they did this quickly and efficiently.

I covered Mr. Kyle up again and walked over to Mrs. Kyle to examine her, too. Her neck had been slashed, aswell, and there were identical cuts on her arm and leg. A submissive personality wasn’t likely to be this imitative, even if they were to entirely obey their dominant— which the first Unsub proved that he had doubts about his own loyalty. He wouldn’t have hung up the phone to just go upstairs with Raphael and follow along in a how-to-murder tutorial of sorts. No, Raphael did both of these. But he wasn’t chaotic, enraged, or disorganized, which were all telltale signs of a dominant personality. These murders weren’t abusive in any way. They were meticulous, but they weren’t brutal.

Emily came in with the doctor so that he could show her what they had been discussing outside. They discussed everything I already noticed, but there was something critical that he had overlooked. The cut on the neck was the last thing that Raphael did to the victims. The cuts on the arm and leg were deep and wide— so much so that one would bleed out within minutes if they were left unattended for too long— but they also looked older than the cut on the neck. Raphael must have made the cuts on the arms and legs of the victims while the first Unsub called the police with the intent of having the victims bleed out; but when they were put on a time crunch, Raphael slit their throats and they ran.

“Isn’t that what slaughterhouses do?” Emily questioned.

The coroner nodded, “Precisely.”

“So we’re dealing with Unsubs who have worked in a slaughterhouse.”

“This is rural Georgia… Everyone down here has worked on a farm where they need to have this kind of experience. If you’re trying to narrow down the suspect list based on that career choice, you’ll find that the list won’t shrink down too far.”

Emily sighed and looked at me. There weren’t many answers I had about narrowing the suspect list down, but I had an idea or two about the Unsubs’ dynamic now. And I was sure that I had figured out what happened last night when the Kyles were murdered. All that I needed to confirm my suspicions was Morgan, Reid, and Gideon’s analysis of the crime scene.

At the field office in Atlanta, everyone was already back from their assignments when Emily and I arrived. Hotch and JJ were sitting at a desk with stacks of files almost as tall as them, while Gideon and Morgan were watching a video on a computer, and Reid was examining a separate computer that they had found at the crime scene. Morgan called me over when he saw me and asked Gideon to start the video over. He asked me to just watch the video and tell them what I saw right off the bat— to go with my gut. My thing was to catch things at a first glance, and they really needed me to come through with that.

The first Unsub, the submissive, was sitting in front of a camera, hiding behind a hood in the shadows. We couldn’t see his face, and we could hardly tell his body shape. There was no real way of knowing what this guy looked like, but I knew his voice from the 911 call, and there was no doubt that it was the first Unsub. He was talking about the punishments for sinning. The world was plagued by disgusting creatures who enjoyed sin and invited it into the mundane world in order to prey on the innocent. They were just cleaning the world of these sinners through murder. The Unsub never directly said it, but I got the impression that he saw the sinners— their victims— as demons from Hell.

When someone started speaking from behind the camera, he started quoting another bible passage— just like they had left at the crime scene. But it wasn’t the first Unsub, nor was it Raphael. It was a third Unsub. After reciting the bible, the third Unsub said that we would all pay seven times. Seven victims. The Kyles were the first two, which meant that there were still five more to come. The footage of the first Unsub sitting in the dark cut out and dissolved into the recorded footage of the murders.

“Woah, wait,” I reached between Morgan and Gideon to pause the video. “Where did you guys find this?”

“The video was on that computer,” Morgan pointed to Reid, who was dusting off the fan of a laptop. “We found the computer itself sitting on a sofa.”

“The computer recorded this, not a camera?”

They both shook their heads and I continued the video. They Kyles didn’t seem to notice the computer or that anything was out of place as they stumbled around their bedroom, desperately trying to rid each other of their clothes. So they didn’t notice that a strange computer was sitting on the sofa in their master bedroom, and they didn’t notice that it was recording anything— even though the computer was in clear view and they would have seen it if it weren’t there before. So the Unsubs didn’t bring it with them. They couldn’t have if they had only just got into the house to have time to make the call and murder the Kyles. It was their computer— that was why they didn’t care about it.

As Mr. Kyle stood to take off his shirt, Raphael came into the bedroom, pulled Mr. Kyle to the ground, and started carving. Mrs. Kyle got up from the bed and started running to the bathroom so as to lock herself in and save herself. And then the video ended.

“So?” Morgan asked me.

“The first Unsub was the one who was willing to be filmed,” I started.

“What about it?”

“Well, normally, the submissives like to hide and just obey. The dominants are the ones who are the face of everything because they have the bolder, stronger personalities. But they decided to put the first Unsub on screen.” That was just another odd piece about their dynamic to add to the pile. Great. “And now there’s a third Unsub, which changes everything we know about these guys. The third Unsub, though… It’s something about him and Raphael, something that I noticed about how they talk. In the 911 call, Raphael says ‘he’ and the first Unsub in this video says ‘he’ as, well—”

“It could be referring to God,” Gideon interrupted.

I shook my head insistently, “No, I don’t think so. The third Unsub in this video says ‘we’, not ‘he’. If they were referring to God, all three of them would have said ‘he’, but they didn’t. I think that they were referring to the third Unsub this whole time. Raphael is the dominant but—” A realization hit me. “I actually… I think I might have a profile for them…”

“All three? Already?” Morgan questioned in shock.

“Yeah.”

“You’re sure?” Gideon clarified.

He knew that it was possible for me to have already built part of a case, but not the entire one— especially when we didn’t have more victims yet to compare victimology, and I hadn’t seen the crime scene. But I didn’t need to. I knew how these guys were operating. I knew their dynamic, or hierarchy, if you will. I had it.

“Uh… Guys…” Reid whispered, standing up from the desk he was working at. He moved away from the computer. “I think I figured something out.”

“What? What is it?” Gideon asked.

“Something struck me as odd while watching the video earlier,” he started explaining. “The computer, it belongs to the Kyles. The Unsubs didn’t put it there to film the murders.” That much I knew, but I didn’t get where he was going with it. “They, uh,” he looked back at the computer nervously, “they’re still watching. They hacked the computer.”

“Can they hear us?” I asked with wide eyes. The whole investigation could be going down the drain. If they were listening, they would know that we were onto them.

He shook his head, “No, but they can see everything.”

We all slowly moved towards the computer to get a look as it started beeping. Reid sat back down to see what was going on. Hotch and JJ ran over when Morgan whistled to catch their attention. The screen of the computer turned black, like it had been turned off remotely, then flashed the words: THE ARMIES OF SATAN WILL NOT RISE. And then the computer shut down entirely. Spencer cursed under his breath as he started fidgeting with all of the components of the computer just to try to turn it back on, but to no avail.

Hotch then told Reid to get the computer to Garcia ASAP, but we all had questions about how the Unsubs even did this. So the first resort was to call Garcia for answers. She told us that anyone could control a computer remotely, but it was usually done when a company would help you with tech support. Emily asked the big question of how the Unsubs could still have access after dealing with a customer, if he really was in tech support. She told us that it was entirely possible that the Unsubs could have left a Trojan Horse of some kind that continued to give him access and control of the computer.

“If you have that profile ready, we have to give it now,” Gideon told me. “They could be watching more potential victims right now. They could strike at any time.”

I nodded an agreement and the whole team started moving to the boardroom where we could discuss the profile privately. The lead detective and the local sheriff were both off handling the crime scene clean up, so we decided that it would be best to discuss and build the profile immediately, then JJ would just hand out a written version of it to every nearby precinct.

I stood at the board where we had pinned up all of the crime scene photos and evidence like the bible passage that had been left in the bedroom. Gideon, JJ, Reid, Morgan, and Emily all sat around the table, but Hotch was sitting on a waist high bookshelf in the corner with his arms crossed over his chest. They wanted me to start with the first Unsub, then the second, and lastly the third. Sounded easy enough.

“The first Unsub, the one who called the police the night of the murders, he’s our submissive—”

“But there are more than two Unsubs. How can they be submissive and dominant?” Gideon interrogated.

I sighed. Giving the profile sounded easy enough, but actually being able to do it without being interrupted every five seconds was going to be the challenge. “I’ll explain, I promise. The first Unsub is the submissive when it comes to the three of them. He was unsure about what they were doing to the Kyles, but he was quick to listen to Raphael when he told him to put the phone down. He also didn’t kill the victims—”

“How do you know that?”

“When I examined both bodies myself, I determined that both victims had been murdered by the same Unsub. The attacks were precise and aimed to kill painfully, but they weren’t disorganized like you would expect from a dominant—”

“So the first Unsub did kill them?”

“No. I think the third Unsub did. The first Unsub was concerned with calling the police, he wouldn’t have the guts to murder the Kyles himself, but he was also listening to a higher authority, like Raphael. Raphael was downstairs with the first Unsub while he called the police, which meant that he didn’t go back upstairs and kill the Kyles because he was busy commanding the first Unsub. Raphael is the dominant. The reason the first Unsub felt safe enough to call the police is because Raphael isn’t the one he’s scared of. It’s the third Unsub, the abuser. The abuser is the one who has the thirst for blood, and Raphael gives him the opportunity to do so because he keeps the first Unsub out of the way.”

“But wouldn’t the submissive have still been scared of Raphael because he’s the dominant?”

“No. They challenge each other because the Unsub sees it as a game of cat and mouse almost, it gives them a rush of sorts. The abuser is the violent one that the submissive doesn’t want to cross, even if it is just a game. Calling the police was a game for the dominant and submissive, but it put the abuser on edge, which was why he cut the victims’ throats.”

“Normally the submissives don’t like to play around with the dominants. They want to listen and obey out of fear of punishment for misbehaving. Why would they want to play just to get a rush out of it? How could you even come to that assumption?”

I gulped and looked at Hotch quickly. I couldn’t say flat out: “personal experience” because that would raise more questions than we had time for. But not giving them an answer would just discredit my profiles. “I, um…” I cleared my throat and shifted my gaze away from Hotch when I saw him glaring at me to tell me not to say anything. “Based on their behaviors. That’s how I know. The submissive was likely told by the dominant to film that video, but the abuser is the one who wants to get the word of God out to the world, so he interrupted and took over the commentary. The dominant allowed the submissive to call the police, but only let it get to a certain extent before stopping him. The submissive is trying to impress the dominant, but the abuser keeps getting in the way.”

“So the first Unsub is the submissive. He’s the organized one, but also the most apprehensive about their mission. He makes sure that they use forensic countermeasures— such as gloves— to make sure that they’re never caught. The second Unsub, Raphael, is the dominant. He’s also organized, but in a way that plays with the submissive’s behavior. He’s organized for the sake of their dynamic, but disorganized when it comes to the crimes. If he’s trying to give the submissive opportunities to prove himself, then the second Unsub is the one who likely has the technological knowledge to find the victims. The third Unsub is the abuser. He’s the one who wants to get the message out. He doesn’t care how they get there or what else happens with the dominant and submissive, he just cares that they kill the members of Satan’s army.” Reid explained all of that while pouring himself a coffee and moving up to the board to look through the evidence again.

“We get their dynamic. Great. But it doesn’t tell us anything about finding them,” Morgan commented, picking up another copy of one of the crime scene photos.

“Back to the drawing boards, then, with the profiles we now have,” Hotch ordered us.

Gideon and Morgan left to go review something about the crime scene or the video the Unsubs posted to the internet. Emily went to go see if she could help with that or figure out any connection to a farm using the knowledge we gained from the autopsies. Hotch, Reid, JJ, and I all stayed in the boardroom. As Reid sat back down with JJ, Hotch stood from leaning against the short bookshelf and walked over to the board I was standing at. We both turned to face the board and go through everything we knew.

“You need to be more careful when you’re talking about those kinds of things,” Hotch whispered under his breath, but just loud enough for me to hear. “They don’t teach that kind of thinking in the academy, and Gideon knows it.”

“It’s not that big of a deal,” I whispered back, pulling the bible page off the board. Forensics had already looked at it, but they didn’t find any fingerprints. “It’s just another profile.”

“A profile that you based on your own life. Don’t think I forgot about how you liked to play last night.”

“I said I was sorry, didn’t I?”

He sucked in a quiet breath past his teeth. “You’ll have to tell me again after this case.”

I was facing him instead of the board now, “Cat and mouse. See?” I smirked. My profile hadn’t been wrong and Hotch’s worry had been misplaced.

My smirk faded as JJ came up to us with a case file. “I think I found something,” she said, handing the file over to Hotch. “Since we couldn’t find any connections with unsolved cases, I started looking at it another way with Reid. We found this report. Someone called the police to report that there was someone watching and trying to get into the Kyles’ house. The witness was walking his dog, and on his way back to his car, he saw a man in dark clothing trying to break into the home.”

“There was only one man?” Hotch questioned. JJ nodded. It was curious that there weren’t three, if it were the Unsubs originally casing the house or even trying to commit the murders earlier. “And the witness?”

“Tobias Hankle. He lives about an hour from here.”

“He didn’t see anything about the suspect?” I asked.

“Nothing but the black clothes.”

Hotch sighed and scratched his stubble. “I mean, it’s certainly a long shot, but we’re not making much progress here. Why don’t you and Reid go talk to Hankle at his home and see if he remembers anything else about that night.”

“Okay,” JJ said, taking the file back from Hotch. Her and Reid collected their things from the table and headed out of the precinct together.

Hotch turned back to me, “You need to find a way to behave yourself during cases.”

“I was proving a point,” I told him.

“And every time you do, all I think about is last night—” He stopped himself. “Just…” He looked around the room just to triple check that we were alone. “Behave.”

“Yes, Sir,” I smirked again and turned back to the board.

The door to the room opened, “Agent Hotchner.” It was the lead detective on the case. He must have just come back from the crime scene. “We got another call. There’s been another murder.”

“Shit…” Hotch groaned.

We drove out to the new crime scene with the rest of the team. When we got there, the sheriff met us outside to give us a run down of what his men found. The Unsubs had called again, but this time only Raphael spoke, not the first Unsub, which was the first unusual thing about this crime scene compared to the last one. The next was the police response time, which was eleven minutes compared to the four prior. The last thing the sheriff told us was that the man who was dead in the upstairs bedroom wasn’t the man who lived in that house. He told us that the Douglas couple lived there, and that Mr. Douglas was away at work, while Mrs. Douglas was supposed to be at home. The man found upstairs was the local handyman, and Mrs. Douglas was nowhere to be found.

“Is he nude?” I asked about the male victim. The sheriff raised a brow at me and slowly nodded, “They were having an affair.”

“Y/N, Emily, go check the body since you guys saw the last ones,” Hotch ordered.

We hurried past our team together and skipped steps on the staircase in order to get to the top floor. The forensics team was just clearing out of the bedroom as Emily and I headed in, putting on the rubber gloves they supplied for us. Just as I had suspected, the victim was naked when he was murdered by our Unsubs. He was laying face down on the ground, but there was blood pooling from his neck, arm, and crotch, just like the other victims.

Emily noticed the computer sitting on the desk and held me back before I could step in front of it. “Don’t look at the camera,” she told me, pointing to the computer. I nodded and we stepped into its field of view together.

We crouched down with our backs to the camera and started to examine the body. Same lacerations, same M.O., but no note. If they were supposed to be messengers from God, then why didn’t they leave anything from the bible this time? Were they scared of fingerprints? Were they in a rush? Why change up the M.O. just when their message was finally being heard?

I grabbed my phone and dialed Garcia. “Speak at once, mere mortal!” she announced in my ear.

“Hey, can you do me a favor? We’ve got another computer in this house with us, and we think it’s streaming right back to the Unsubs. Can you trace it?”

“If it’s connected to the internet, I sure can. I’ll call and let you know what I find.”

“Thanks, Garcia.”

“Now, be gone, mortal!” And she hung up.

I put my phone back in my pocket.

“There’s not much here that we don’t already know,” Emily said. “They didn’t change anything but the bible page. If they were having an affair, one would think that they would have at least ten different pages laying around about adultery.”

Morgan knocked on the door. “Hotch wants to talk outside with everyone.”

Emily and I pushed ourselves to our feet and carefully walked out of the room while making sure to not notice the computer. Garcia would call back in a few minutes with either good or bad news, and I was just praying that it was good news. We needed a new lead or these guys were going to keep getting away with murder.

When we got outside, Hotch asked us if there was anything of importance in the crime scene to take note of, and we both shook our heads. “Fine, so what do we know about these guys?”

“They called the cops, but this time Raphael did it. But why?” Morgan questioned.

“They saw that we were catching onto them because of the computer. We spooked them, so the dominant stepped in to protect the submissive this time around,” I answered.

But as I said it, I realized that it didn’t make much sense in the context of these guys. With me and Hotch, he got protective and defensive about nearly everything that had to do with me, but that was because there was a romantic aspect involved. Psychopaths and sociopaths don’t have the ability to love, and we had proven that the dominant and submissive’s game was to excite each other about the crime, not to protect each other.

I tried to take a step back to look at it from another angle. “Do we know what Raphael said on the phone?”

“‘Behold, I will cast her into a bed, and then that commit adultery’,” Hotch said. “Gideon says that they’re talking about Jezebel. The Unsubs knew that they were having an affair because of the computer again.”

Something was wrong about all of this still. Why did Raphael call, and why did he quote the bible when that was the third Unsub’s purpose? If the submissive wasn’t calling the police, and he wasn’t with the third Unsub out of fear of the violence, then where was he? And how did they take Mrs. Douglas all at the same time? None of the personalities were aligning, that was the problem. If they had, the timeline would have made sense, but it didn’t.

A thought struck me about what could have been happening, but I didn’t have Reid there to give me more information. He was still off with JJ at Tobias Hankle’s house, trying to collect any information about that night he witnessed someone trying to get into the Kyles’ house. But when it came to psychopathic submissives and dominants, they never switched roles. Not like this, at least, which was why something occurred to me, but I just couldn’t be sure without Reid. I didn’t have anyone there to back up or correct my theory. But I had to try, right?

“What if… What if we’re not even dealing with three Unsubs?”

They all looked at me. Hotch was the first to verbalize their confusion. “What do you mean?”

“I think that we’ve been looking at this all wrong. There aren’t three Unsubs. There’s only one.”

“How’s that possible?” Morgan questioned with a slight chuckle.

“Dissociative Personality Disorder— more commonly known as Multiple Personality Disorder.”

“You mean that there’s one Unsub who believes that he’s three different people?”

I nodded, “The submissive is the one that protects the host, but he got scared, so the dominant came forward this time to protect the submissive. The dominant is the mediator between the submissive and the abuser. He’s the one who tries to protect and entertain the submissive, while also encouraging the abuser’s behavior. The abuser, the third personality, he’s the true psychopath. He’s the one who wants to inflict the pain. Together, they make one man who is three personalities stuck inside of his mind that have been created for different purposes: protection, mediation, and violence.”

“They’re right,” Gideon said to all of us as he stormed out of the house with a bible page in hand. “I found this next to the telephone near the back door, which was unlocked.” He handed the paper to Hotch. “‘Power was given unto them over the fourth part of the Earth. To kill with sword, with hunger, and with death, and with the beasts of the Earth’,” he quoted from memory. “Raphael is one of the Archangels. Mrs. Douglas is Jezebel. You figure out the rest.”

“He thinks that he’s an Archangel sent by God to cleanse the Earth, that’s why he’s the mediator. He doesn’t want to see the innocent harmed, but he wants to see the sinners suffer. Mrs. Douglas is an adulterer, so he views her as Jezebel.”

“Yeah, well, if Mrs. Douglas is Jezebel, there’s an especially unpleasant death in her future,” Hotch commented.

“How do you mean?”

“Jezebel was eaten alive by dogs.”

My phone started ringing. I answered the call, “Garcia, please tell me you have some good news for me.”

“Unfortunately not, my pretty. There’s been another video uploaded to the internet.”

“You’re joking. Is it the handyman murder?”

“No. Worse. Did you guys have a missing woman you were looking for?”

“Yeah, Mrs. Douglas. Why?”

“Well, you won’t be looking for her anymore.”

“How come?”

“The Unsubs just released a new video of her… being eaten alive by a pack of dogs.”

I looked up at Hotch and Gideon, “We’re too late.”

“I’m sending the video to you guys now. Can you get to a computer?”

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

I started heading back inside and everyone followed me. I stayed on the phone with Garcia as we all marched back up into the bedroom where the computer was still sitting open. I didn’t care if this poor bastard saw my face. We knew that he couldn’t hear us, Spencer said so himself. I wanted this guy to see me. I wanted him to know that we were onto him.

I pulled up the video Garcia sent over and pressed play. It was the first Unsub on camera again— though, I supposed that if I were indeed correct, then it was our only Unsub on screen, but it was the submissive personality that was reading from the bible. He was reading a passage about Jezebel’s death, Mrs. Douglas chained up and gagged behind him. Just as he finished reciting it, the Unsub set the dogs upon her.

I went to turn off the video, but the sheriff, who had just entered the room to see what we were looking at, stopped me. We all watched as he stepped closer to the computer to get a better look.

He pointed to the dogs, “I know these dogs— I mean, I know the owner. Those dogs attacked someone a couple of months ago, and I would’ve impounded them, but the victim knew the owner and didn’t want to press charges.”

“Are you sure that those are the same dogs?” Gideon asked.

The sheriff nodded, “As God as my witness.”

“Who’s the owner?”

“Hankle. Tobias Hankle.”

“Wait,” Hotch stepped in, “Tobias Hankle?” The sheriff nodded again. “Shit,” he wiped his hands over his face. “JJ and Spencer drove out there to talk to him. He was the witness who called the cops to tell them that someone was trying to break into the Kyles’ house a few months ago. How far from here is Hankle’s home?”

“About an hour and forty-five minutes.”

“The sun will be down by then. Garcia,” Hotch called to her through my phone, “can you try to get ahold of Reid or JJ?”

“On it,” she hung up immediately to call them.

We all ran back to the cars. Morgan grabbed all of the bulletproof vests from the car before jumping in with us. Hotch immediately floored it with the sirens and lights on the second everyone was in our car. Morgan started passing out our vests, and we put them on as fast as we could, despite the hour and forty-five minute drive that we had ahead of us. I tried to call Garcia to see if she got ahold of either Reid or JJ, but the signal died just as we left the suburbs and started driving the forty-five minutes through middle of nowhere Georgia towards Atlanta, where we would then have another hour to drive out to Hankle’s house.

“Could you get through to them?” Hotch asked after he noticed that I put my phone away. I shook my head. “I shouldn’t have sent them out there. We should have made him come into the station for questioning.”

“You thought he was just a witness, Hotch. You can’t blame yourself.”

“I’m their supervisor. Their safety is my responsibility. I shouldn’t have sent them out there, he repeated as if it would change the situation we were in.

“Y/N’s right, Hotch,” Morgan said. “This isn’t on you.”

Hotch’s grip around the steering wheel tightened. He heard us and he knew that we were right, but he just couldn’t force himself to believe it until we would find Reid and JJ safe and alive.

It was an hour and forty-five minutes of driving to Hankle’s house. An hour and forty-five minutes of worrying about them. An hour and forty-five minutes of Hotch sitting in silence as he ran through every regret he had. And the worst part was, there was nothing I could do to ease his nerves or conscience.

When we arrived at Tobias Hankle’s home, everything suddenly started to make sense about him and the profiles we built. Emily and I had profiled the Unsub as someone who had experience slaughtering animals, and we weren’t far off. Hankle lived on a farm out in the middle of nowhere. There was a house up front, behind it a large barn, and just past that was a vast sea of tall crops that anyone could get lost in.

The black SUV we were riding in slid a bit on the loose dirt path beneath us. The sheriff spread his men out with different assignments, and Hotch did the same for us. Hotch sent me and Morgan to the barn, while Emily, Gideon, and Hotch were all going to check the large house. The sheriff handed one walkie to me and one to Hotch for emergencies.

“You stay with me. The entire time. Got it?” he clarified with me as we started running around the house and towards the barn. I nodded and turned on my flashlight.

We approached the two large doors of the barn and we pressed our backs against the outside walls, just beside the hinges. He held up three fingers and slowly started counting down. When his hand was in a fist, we both pushed our backs off of the walls, turned around, and kicked the doors in. We headed in with our guns and flashlights raised, but we stayed silent as we moved through the dark.

Morgan pointed his flashlight at the carcass of a dog and looked up at me to make sure that I saw it. I nodded. Three dogs killed Mrs. Douglas on the video. One down, two more to go. We continued on through the barn, and I found the next dog. Only one more left. We kept moving and I found the stable to the left where Mrs. Douglas was mauled and eaten alive. The last dog was in there. Each of them had been shot, they hadn’t started eating each other or any other cause of death imaginable for them. Shot.

“Did Hankle kill them after he was done with them?” I questioned while peeking into the stable to take a look at everything. There was no trace of Mrs. Douglas. No bones, no flesh, no limbs, just blood. Blood everywhere. On the wood of the stables, on the mattress that had been put in there, on the hay beneath the mattress. So much blood. But nothing else.

“FBI!” someone called from the stable behind us.

Morgan and I turned with our weapons raised, my finger on the trigger. When I saw JJ staring back at us with her own weapon raised, I lowered mine. She was looking around frantically, not realizing that it was me and Morgan who had found her. Morgan tried to lower his weapon, too, to show that it was just him and that she was going to be alright, but she was still in a panic and couldn’t put two and two together.

“JJ, it’s just us— Morgan and Greenaway,” Morgan said, taking careful steps closer to her.

She slowly lowered her gun, but she still looked at us with wide eyes. “Tobias Hankle is the Unsub.”

“Yeah, we know. Y/N, call an ambulance.”

I stepped away to talk into the comms in order to call for an ambulance. No one on the team responded, so I tried the walkies that the sheriff handed to me before we split off. I called for an ambulance again, and one of the dispatchers responded that they were already sending one, but it was still a few minutes away. I lifted my wrist again for the team comms to ask if anyone had eyes on Reid, but Emily responded to say that the house was cleared and empty.

“JJ,” I turned back to her, “where’s Reid?”

“I… Um…” She held her head in her palms like she was trying to remember where she last saw him. “We said that we were going to split up. He went around the back, but he never came in.”

Morgan was already on his toes and running out the back of the barn to go find Spencer. I tried yelling after him to tell him to wait up, but he was gone. He was the one who wanted to stay with me and make sure we didn’t split off, but the second he heard that something was wrong with Reid, he was only focused on finding him. Knowing that I couldn’t leave JJ to chase after him, I offered her my hand and we headed out of the barn and towards the cars to wait for the ambulance. Emily, Gideon, and Hotch were talking on the porch of the house with the sheriff about what they found in the house. I opened one of the car doors for JJ and let her sit down while I stood by.

“They just… They tore her apart,” JJ whispered. “There was nothing left of her…” She looked at me. “I had to kill them. The dogs. They were still hungry, even after all of that… And when Reid didn’t come in after hearing the gunshots, I knew that something was wrong, but I was too… I was too paralyzed to go looking for him…”

“This isn’t your fault, JJ. You didn’t know. No one did.”

“We shouldn’t have split up. I told him that we shouldn’t’ve, but he didn’t listen to me.”

The ambulance’s sirens and lights made an appearance for the first time down the road as they came speeding up to the house. I helped JJ back to her feet and led her over to the ambulance just after it parked. The EMTs jumped out of the vehicle and opened up the back so that JJ could sit down again while they checked on her. When she was in safe hands, I took a step away and looked back at the barn to see if Morgan was back with Reid yet, but there was no sign of either of them.

“Morgan!” I called out, running back over to the silent barn. When he didn’t respond from inside, I called over to Emily, and she ran down from the porch to meet me. “Morgan ran into the field to find Reid. They’re not back yet.” She knew what that meant as well as I did, so we started running. We headed around the barn and to the edge of the field. “Morgan! Reid!” No response. “Morgan!” Still nothing. I looked to Emily and we nodded to each other before running into the field together. “Morgan! Reid!” Nothing but the sounds of me and Emily pushing through the tall stalks of wheat. “Derek! Spencer!” Maybe calling them by their first names would catch their attention. Just maybe. “Derek!”

“I’m over here,” he said just to my left. He didn’t scream, but he didn’t whisper it either. He sounded like he had meant to scream, but he seemed defeated somehow. Emily and I changed directions to find him standing in the middle of the field on a small path, his head lowered. “He’s not here,” Morgan whispered, kicking at some of the rocks. “There’s drag marks and blood. But there’s no Reid.”

“Hankle took him?” Emily asked.

“That son of a bitch…”

I walked up to Morgan and put a gentle hand on his shoulder. He looked up at me, anger glossing over his eyes. “There’s nothing we can do about it tonight, Morgan,” I told him. “We won’t find him running in the dark like this. We’ll just get turned around ourselves.”

“They’re right,” Emily backed me up. “We need to regroup and profile Hankle if we’re going to find Spencer.”

Morgan nodded understandingly. Emily and I were right. Running around like headless chickens wasn’t going to do Spencer any good, even if Hankle hadn’t taken him and he was just lost. We would send out a search party in the morning, and I was sure that Hotch and the sheriff already closed down every road out of town. If Hankle took Reid, he wasn’t going to get far. But we all just needed to collect ourselves and catch our breaths. We had JJ, and she could help us profile and find Hankle. We were all set to catch him soon. Morgan just needed to hold onto faith.

The three of us headed back to the house. Gideon and Hotch were inside, and JJ was finishing up with the EMTs. No trip to the hospital for her, which was good. She spotted us arriving from the field and pushed past the medics to talk to us. She asked if we found Reid, even though he clearly wasn’t with us. When Morgan walked past her without a word and I couldn’t look at her, she guessed, but Emily finally told her the truth.

I didn’t say another word to JJ before walking past her, too, and heading into Tobias Hankle’s house to talk with the rest of the team about what they found. They were all standing in a computer room on the first floor on the left side of the building. There were more computers and monitors in that one room than I had ever seen in Penelope’s office— and that was saying something. Some were vintage computers from the 80’s, others were brand-spankin’ new. But what mattered was that Tobias Hankle did have all of the computers to watch his potential victims, and he had the technological knowledge to use them in order to hack people. With so many computers and not enough Garcias, she would have to come down to Georgia to help find Reid. This was going to be all hands on deck.

Hotch and Morgan caught me walking into the room before turning back to all of the computers. “I’ve already called Garcia. She’ll be flying down here first thing in the morning,” Hotch said to me, though not facing me. I called it, didn’t I? “Everyone should try to get some sleep. There’s nothing we can do until morning when we can look for Reid and get Garcia here.”

“No,” I insisted, “we need to search this house and figure out if there’s any clue as to where he took Reid.”

“Everyone’s exhausted and shaken up. We won’t be able to build a clear profile with whatever we find.”

“I don’t think that’s the right call—”

“But it’s my call,” he raised his voice, turning to me again.

I doubled down. Emotions were high— especially for him and JJ. They were both putting the blame on themselves, and it was stressing them out. JJ was dealing with it by going into panic mode, while Hotch was handling it with anger. He wasn’t going to listen, but I wasn’t going to just sit around or fall asleep, not while Reid was still out there with that psychopath. He needed our help, and we all knew the statistics of kidnapping victims making it past the first few hours. Reid’s life was on borrowed time, and we needed to find him one way or another. So I turned and stormed out of the computer room to start looking through the bedrooms upstairs.

Hotch was right about one thing, though. We all needed rest and to calm down, and even though my eyelids were growing heavy as my adrenaline began to subside, I wasn’t about to give in. I felt like I was going to topple over on the stairs or pass out in the first bedroom as I walked in, but I just tried to focus my vision on one thing and figure out what I could learn about Tobias Hankle and the other personalities he had fighting for dominance in his mind.

I turned on the bedroom light to help me see and to hopefully help me stay awake. I started with the desk, taking a seat at it to help rest my legs for a moment. He had papers stacked neatly everywhere, but they were all old school assignments from, like, fifth grade. The kind of assignments parents would put on the fridge when they were proud of their kid’s achievements. The kind of assignments that Hotch and I put on the fridge when Jack would bring home an A+. Tobias still had them sitting prominently in his room, however. Why? He was in his mid-thirties. Why hadn’t he gotten rid of them or at least stored them away yet?

I rubbed my eyes and opened one of the drawers. There were toys hiding in there. Little green soldier men and knucklebone— things that a kid would stuff in his drawers after his parents would yell at him to pick up his room. I knew because that was where Jack hid his toys when he was too lazy to put them away and I would have to find them and do it for him later so that he wouldn’t lose them. The only two toys Jack took everywhere with him, though, were the red dinosaur and the green Hot Wheels car. Tobias had similar behavior to Jack in that regard. There was only one stuffed animal on his bed, while the others were neatly placed on a shelf, and the toys in the drawers, and the school assignments on the desk. Tobias’s first personality, the submissive one, was a child. He still saw himself as the young, innocent boy that he was when he was in fifth grade or so.

“What are you doing in here?”

I nearly fell out of the chair at the shock of Hotch sneaking up behind me. After I yelped, I saw that it was just him leaning against the doorframe, his arms crossed and his face all broody like he was mad at me. He wasn’t wearing his vest anymore, like I was. He was back in his suit jacket and tie, yet he still looked somehow disheveled.

I caught my breath and calmed my racing heart while turning back to the desk. “I’m helping,” I told him, busying my hands with looking through the assignments on the desk.

“I told you that you need to rest.”

“Is Morgan resting? Is Gideon resting? Are you going to rest?”

“Morgan’s already making a pot of coffee…” Hotch admitted.

“Good. I’ll take one.”

“No, you won’t. You need to sleep.”

“I’m fine,” I insisted, smiling over at him to prove my point.

He rolled his eyes. “Your eyes are sunken and half open. You’ll fall asleep at that desk before you can find anything of use.”

“Oh, yeah?” I challenged. I grabbed the stack of papers and opened the drawer again to show him what I had found. “Tobias’s submissive personality is a kid. That’s why he called the cops but was so quick to listen to Raphael.”

Hotch came over and took the papers from me to get a proper look for himself. He flicked through each page, licking his fingers every time he wanted to flip to the next one. “So what does this tell us about where he took Reid?”

I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head slowly. It was good information for a profile, but it wasn’t going to tell us anything about where Tobias took Spencer. Tobias’s submissive personality wouldn’t have been the one to make that decision. He might have known a place, but he wouldn’t have recommended it. Wherever he took Reid had to have been somewhere either Raphael or the abuser personality knew about and knew that no one would be able to find. A stack of school papers, some toys in a drawer, neatly placed stuffed animals, and a perfectly clean room weren’t going to give us the answers we absolutely needed.

Hotch crouched beside me and gently put his hand on my arm. “JJ and Emily are taking the couches downstairs. You need to sleep at some point.”

“No, I don’t.” I couldn’t believe he was already back to this. Spencer was out there somewhere, waiting for us to find him. There wasn’t any time to sleep.

“Yes. You do. You’re not weak if you're just taking care of yourself.”

“I know that.”

“Do you? Because you’re not acting like it. You keep doing reckless things that impact your safety and health all in the name of this job, Y/N. You’re acting like you need to keep proving yourself. You don’t. You’re human if you need to sleep, take a break, cry, feel things— whatever. You’re just like the rest of us and no one’s going to look down on you for getting some rest when you’ve worn yourself out.”

“He needs me, Hotch.”

“He needs us. The best way we can help him is by being on top of our game. You can’t keep going like this. Just take the bed and sleep for a few hours.”

“I don’t want to sleep in this creep’s house.”

“Is that what this is about?”

I nodded. It was part of the reason. While I wanted to help Reid in any way I could as fast as I could, if Hotch was going to send me to bed, he had to know that it wouldn’t be in that house. I would have rather slept on the grass just out front. Anywhere but in that psychopath’s home. It was too unnerving to think about sleeping in one of the beds since all of the couches were taken. It was just too odd.

Hotch grabbed my hand, “Come with me.” He pulled me to my feet and started leading me down stairs and out of the house.

We passed the computer room where Morgan and Gideon were half asleep while trying to find what they could, and JJ and Emily were in the living room, laying down on the couches and talking to each other quietly as they began to wind down for the night. Hotch opened the front door and continued to guide me outside, past the porch, past the grass, and over to the black SUV we had brought.

Hotch let go of my hand so that he could pull the trunk open, then kneel inside so that he could push the backseats down flat to create more space in the trunk. He grabbed the vests that he, Emily, Gideon, and Morgan all peeled off themselves once they knew that there was no threat around the farm, and he threw them up to the front seat. I started pulling all of the velcro straps apart on my vest and pulled it off my body before handing it to Hotch, and he threw it up front with the others.

The trunk was officially cleaned out, but I didn’t understand what for until Hotch told me to climb in. I raised a brow and chuckled. He sat down in the trunk and patted an empty space beside him before telling me to climb in again. My eyes stayed on his as I gave in and crawled in beside him. I turned around to face the open back of the car and sat down, my legs stretched out in front of me. I sighed and let my eyes fall shut just to find a moment of peace and clarity.

It was so quiet and so relaxing. No one would have ever guessed that a place like it would have been home to a psychotic serial killer. But that was how it always went. It was always the person neighbors least expected who always turned out to be the most violent. Tobias was just a boy who didn’t get the help he needed, and so his mental stability spiraled and he became the violent murderer we discovered him to be. Living in seclusion on a farm like that, where the only thing you could hear for miles was the chirping of crickets, it would make anyone go insane after so long. But just spending a night there in the car, with Hotch at my side, it didn’t seem so bad. I couldn’t forget that Reid was out there all alone with Tobias, and I couldn’t shake the feeling that I was letting him down by giving into the idea of sleep, but I could at least find enough peace in the cool wind passing by the car that I started to grow more tired. We would help Reid in the morning, just as Hotch promised.

“Is this better?” Hotch asked me quietly. I nodded and laid down flat on my back with my eyes shut. I shivered as the wind passed by again. “Are you alright?” he asked, noticing right away. I turned onto my side, now facing Hotch, and pulled my knees up slightly to trap some warmth around my body. He caught on quickly, so he took off his jacket and laid it over me. I instantly felt at home in the strangest of ways, but I didn’t question it because it just felt so nice. “I love you,” he whispered, resting his palm on my thigh.

I put my hand over his, “I love you, too.”

#criminal minds #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds imagines #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds fanfic #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch hotchner #aaron hotchner imagine #aaron hotchner imagines

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shiftysdogtags · 4 years ago

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Some domestic Toye HCs would really water my crops 👀

I enjoyed writing this WAY too much😂 it's less domestic and more fluffy? i don't know why but i let the writing gods guide me and this is where they took me. I really hope you like it and gives you as much Toye feels as it has given me.

All request are open💕

Taglist: @floydtab @curraheewestandalone @liebegott

Joe never thought he would be the type to fall completely and utterly in love with someone. Yes, he knew he would end up with someone, but he didn’t think he would be in love as he is.

It’s like a little obsession he has. Where most people want a cup to tea or nap after a long day, Joe wants a kiss and a hug from his person. And if he doesn’t get them you best believe he sulks and broods on his own.

He can’t believe he ended up living with someone so amazing as you who understands him so well and can read his every little emotion. He makes sure to thank you and tell you that you are loved at least a thousand times a day.

He acts all mushy when you’re around and he can’t help the smile at always crosses his face when you look at him.

He makes up an excuse to talk to you just so he can see your face when you look up from whatever you were doing. It’s something dorky that if you didn’t know Joe the way you did, you would’ve thought it was an out of character thing for him to do.

And his heart melts when you say his name and he swear is the most beautiful sound he has ever heard. If you’re in another room and you call him, it takes him a second to realise what is going on, and another to actually answer you back.

If you call him Joey, he knows you want something. He pretends to hate it, but he secretly loves it. He doesn't let anyone else call him that because it is reserved for you and you alone.

This man is one you do not want to cross. If anyone even thought of saying something negative about you or he didn't like their tone of voice, there is nothing he wouldn't do to defend your honour.

It's a rare occurrence, but it has happened that he has come home with scrapes and bruises because he didn't like the way someone was talking about you. You are the most precious thing to him and Hell be damned if he would let anything slide when it comes to you.

Joe can be surprisingly handy around the house and if he thinks he can do it himself he refuses to let anyone do it for him. But sometimes it’s ended in disaster and he has to admit defeat and ask you for help.

He sits on the floor when putting furniture together and he can be really stubborn. He will sit and huff if he loses a screw and even if you suggest walking away to take a break, he won’t give up till he’s completed it.

If you’ve gone shopping or bought something that is even slightly heavy, Joe refuses to let you carry it. He loves to do little things like that for you because he thinks it’s a nice way to show the person, he is with how much he loves them.

One of his favourite things to do is watch you put away the food shopping. He sits against the countertop and watches you zoom around the kitchen in your own little world. Sometimes there’s a little conversation but normally he is too lost in looking at you to form a sentence.

But when you need help placing something on a high shelf or press, he is standing behind you ready to help before you can even ask him to. If you ask him to do anything consider it done. There is nothing this man would not do to see you smile.

In return for Joe putting something together or helping you out, he demands kisses. He won't do anything without the promises of kisses before and after.

On days off Joe likes to do nothing, but that’s only if you have the day off too. If you have work or plans, he can’t sit and do nothing by himself and he looks for a distraction, so he forgets that you’re not there with him.

He usually cooks something for the both of you. While Joe isn’t an amazing cook, he does a pretty good job once it’s not too complicated.

No matter what, he always leaves the kitchen in a mess and he SWEARS he is going to clean it up, but you promise to help him. After all he is the one who made the food. It's a nice way for the two of you to catch up and talk about what you did during your time apart.

Because he can’t really cook, you normally make dinners, but he loves to help you out. He proudly shows you the carrots he has chopped or apologises when he lets the soup on the stove boil over, either one earns him a kiss on the nose, and he is in heaven.

If you also have the day off, his ideal day is spending the morning wrapped up in bed with you beside him. He wakes up first, because he's a light sleeper and doesn't really sleep, and he likes looking at you sleeping peacefully beside him.

With your back to his chest and his arm loosely over your waist, he whispers everything he loves about you in your ear in his raspy morning voice. His voice is huskier than usual because he is literally only awake and it's still thick with sleep. And a special mention in here about his sexy morning voice for @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant.

When you're both chilling on the sofa doing nothing in particular, Joe likes to lay his head in your lap. And while he would never ask for it, 99% of the time he wants you to play with his hair or just rub the back of his head.

If he's had a really bad day, he storms into the house and slams every door in the process. He throws, and I literally mean throws, himself onto the couch beside you and once you ask him if he wants to talk about it the flood gates open and you can't get him to shut up until he completely finishes the story.

On days like that, he lies in your lap as well, and he finds it so relaxing when you draw shapes on his shoulders as he tells you about his day. He appreciates all the little kisses you place on his forehead every so often.

Joe loves to have you sit on his lap where he can have his hands on you. He likes to rub circles onto your hip with his thumb or he runs his fingers up and down your arm. His favourite is when he can put his hand on your thigh when you're talking to him. It's nothing sexual for him. It just calms him down and it really grounds him.

Joe Toye appears rough and ready on the outside, and while he looks ready to fight anyone who looks his way, he is such a soft human being. It is a fact, and no one can change my mind.

#band of brothers headcanon #band of brothers headcanons #joe toye x reader #toye x reader #joe toye headcanon #joe toye headcanons #bob headcanons #bob headcanon #joseph toye headcanon #joseph toye headcanons #joseph toye x reader

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beecherdrysdale · 4 years ago

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Hiii how are you ? I fell down the stairs today and cried for a minute straight #hormones. Dw I have a high pain tolerance but I just started sobbing lol. It happens. LONG post ahead, I kinda went off hehe.

Anyways let’s get started!! Yes quinton gets to be upfront because he would probably feel so uncomfortable(no offence) with all the sexual tension going on there if dyl or jamie were in the front hehe. But yes they would be bitchy about who gets to sit upfront “ no Jamie it’s mine turn to sit with Brigid” “ no it’s my turn dylan you just sat with her” so brigid would get fed up and banishes them to the back hehe. Lmao Brigid can we listen to Katy perry now? The silence!! And then no can we listen to Lady Gaga?. Quinton trying not to lose it in the front seat. If I had to chose tho I would chose lady gaga:) wbu?

Get ready to be beat! Yes Ryan is absolutely not sitting upfront w me! We would be crazy and I wanna win so. Quinner is sitting up front w me but he decided to be .... and I’m banish him to the back. Braden is the most chill so he’s sitting upfront and giving me directions!! Haha dyl yelling at you to drive faster, but no I will beat both hehe;). Kesh who’s sitting up front w you? Would Kirby be handsy😏?. We would have to make so many stops lol. Like it’s just nostalgic for us, but new for you so it would be fun to make pit stops. and we would just be taking so many Instagram photos as a group and w our boys and together ! We love that ! “Wait wait wait Lexi pull over, I remember this place I wanna take photos” lol this is bad hehe.

Lmao yes, your hair would be so tangled!! They would be panicking a bit because they’re like omg she’s gonna be so mad.... honestly Ryan would just take the photo and then post it but then Dylan would repost it and then Jamie and then me lol. Honestly I kinda love when people just take videos of being in the car w like the scenery showing, but this would include us laughing and listening to music! I hope they makes sense. Hehe Ryan or Dylan would probably take photos of Braden, cozzy and devon sleeping and would post it. Back to the hair: hehe yes I can see you giving them a death glare when you realize and your getting mad and would hide. I’m just imagining this in my head, like me pulling over and you running out of the car and quinton and devon fixing your hair lol. Somebody would be filming this no doubt.

Music wise, yes I love blasting music and people looking but it’s kinda a flex when they see who we are with.... I like rap too! What song do u like Brigid?. Country will be played and 2000’s which is fun! I’m good with anything !. Kesh I love hype up songs as well and bass heavy songs because they sound good on speakers hehe. I’ve been into Rihanna for the past week and I was working out to her music- where have you been, rude boy, bitch better have my money lol, pon de replay hit different but also S&M for some sexiness. Lmao sorry I’m just listing Rihanna songs that I love atm. What are your fav songs right now? Awww dancing on the side of the road is so soft, but everybody needs a dance break! Cozzy, Devon and Braden are some how still passed out, I admire that. Late night drives🥺 are we spicing this up 😏.

Hehe you and devon are swamped w emails and more and you’re like kirby can you please go w them we need somebody to watch them. Als yes quinton go take those hot photos . I admire Dylan’s sleep schedule, like good job on catching up on sleep. Kirbys just trying to sweet talk you and kiss you so that you wouldn’t be mad. All in all, kesh is just shocked like how is that possible? Lmao Brigid, Ryan and I w the shopping cart just stocking up on popcorn, chips m&ms, I love that. Jamie and Dylan are racing each other to see who can grab the most cereal and made sure that they are getting the correct ones for Brigid. Honestly all the boys are just confused about how grocery shopping works hehe. The crackhead energy. Kirby is panicking. We literally bought out all the snacks. Beaver tails are delish and I know where you can get them so 😃. I want to stuff Quinner’s mouth w beaver tails cuz that’s cute:) yes healthy food is a must, like fruits, veggies, rice cakes hehe. But remember that we are going to workout on this vacay hehe. After the grocery store we would go into the mall or something and the boys would just be wanting to buy video games 😂 and ps5’s. Also kesh I love how some of the boys are just trying on clothes. Why do I get a feeling that one of the boys would just be filming all of this?

The chirping will happen nonstop, I’m sorry it’s just to much inspo. Aww yes they are blushing real hard, cuz they like you soooo much. But Brigid is enjoying touching them so no prob.

The boat is a must and it is happening!! Hehe yes the tubing would be chaotic, everybody is just trying to get each other to fall in 😂. Ryan thinks that he’s getting away w pushing me in but SIKE you are coming with me. So then we’re just fighting in the water. Quinner would be like where did they go?. Hehe brigid gets so wrapped up in laughing at us that Braden pushes her in haha. Yes we all look super hot in our bikinis, and the boys are speechless! Like dyl and Jamie are just like wow, she looks so amazing! And Kirby is so in love w you, he’s like I’m the luckiest man ever. I’m still gonna make sure that I wear a non tie bikini so that it doesn’t untie, like one time I was in the boat and my friend pulled on the string and the entire thing untied and I just jumped in the water to retie. That is not happening again lol. Quinner would be mad hehe. Idk I’m seeing Brigid in a black bikini or maybe a dark blue one? It would match your eyes?. Kesh in a red one or yellow and me maybe in a green one or just black lol. Hehe yes kesh and Kirby are just doing cute couple stuff and keeping an eye out but we are to chaotic to maintain .

Hehe yes ig we are clingy but cute drunks but I get kinda wild when I drink so the body shots would def happen. It would be hot tbh. Yes somebody do body shots w Brigid. Dylan would step up first, and he would be enjoying it and then Jamie sees and is like no it’s my turn so he does it and in the end it’s just a competition and you all get drunk hehe. Kesh and Kirby are the parents of the clubbing trip no offence.. like wanna go help cozzy and devon? Hehe lol I could just be dancing w Brigid and the boys would get jealous and one of them would just come up and be like excuse may I cut in, and i would be like tf but then they give me a glare and I go dance sexy with Quinner or crazy w Ryan. Kesh and Kirby should dance at least at one point during this time. We all look hot btw :)

Hehe yay I can be friends w Dylan :) I want that friendship to happen tbh. but he’s getting jealous but I’m like let them have their moment, so I distract him a bit w talking.

Girls day is a must! I wanna hang out w you so badly. Some cute clothing will be bought! Ooo yes us modelling and them being in awe. Oo kesh a different modelling show w the boys 😏. The boys are getting handsy esp Dylan and Jamie hehe. And they are super protective so no other guy at the club gets any ideas. After tho it’s biker shorts, sweat pants and hoodies type of vacay lol .

Thank you for reading ! Hope you enjoy mes chéries💗🌸

yes ok so loooong post ahead people

oof that tough falling down the stairs lol. honestly i’m not doing to great right now bc i did not do as well as i wanted at my meet, so now i’m in a funky headspace. but hopefully answering this ask will help, and i can get my shit together before my events tomorrow (which are actually my important events)

haha yes dyl and jamie would just be arguing like “no it’s my turn to sit in front, no you just did it’s my turn” lmao. and then whenever they’re sitting in the front there’s just too much tension for quinton to deal with lol. so then i feel bad for quinton so i banish the other guys to the back and let him sit in the front hehe. and i’m just ignoring the other guys and refuse to play either of their music and i let quinton pick. and if we purposely pick songs we know the other guys hate, that’s a secret we’ll never tell. oof between those two idk, probably lady gaga, but again we’re not playing music jamie and dyl like lol.

haha no, you get ready to get beat. i’m like an INSANE driver when i want to be. and ofc dylan is just yelling at me “faster brigid, hurry tf up! we have to beat everyone” so then we’re just zooming. but then obviously you’re doing your best to keep up so you have to banish ryan to the back so he doesn’t distract you. and then you let quinner sit up front until he starts getting too handsy bc you’re like no i won’t let myself get distracted. so then braden’s up front giving directions and trying to get you to go faster, but i’m still winning lol. and then kesh is also still in the race, and she and kirby are just chilling in the front bc everyone else’s asleep. ooooh yes making lots of pit stops bc nostalgia for all of you canadians. and then me and kesh are just seeing all the sights for the first time. oooooh yes all the cute insta pics we could take

ooooh yes people taking vids of like the music and scenery would be so cute to post as stories. and ofc all of us laughing and stuff, that would be so cute. anyways yes, my hair would be a hugeeee knot. and i would just give them the death glare, like you’ve got to be fucking kidding me. and jamie and dyl just try to hide from me, like they run away as soon as the car is stopped. and then devon and quinton fix it for me, god bless their souls. like i’m sorry, bc even i wouldn’t want to deal with that. ik how my hair can get. and this would be allllll over everyone’s stories ofc lmao

ok yessss our music game is on point tbh. ok so for rap, the artists i’m really into rn are juice wrld (rip i actually loved him sm), kid laroi (who learned from juice, so he sounds a lot like him), trippie redd, mgk, and nf. also iann dior, but he’s not so much rap as r&b. honestly any of their songs slap. and then ofc country and early 2000′s. and any music with good bass, but i think a lot of the artists i said have that. ooooh yes getting out to have a dance party on the side of the road. hehe it could be really crazy. or alternatively, it could be when you’re out on a late night drive and there’s a slow song on the radio and you guys just get out and slow dance to the song together no this is not at all inspired by the song slow dance in a parking lot anyways yes late night drives are so cute. but then of course they can get spicy 😏 in case you couldn’t tell i’m always down for it to get spicy lmao

haha yes quinton and dylan c. honestly have their priorities straight. and devon and kesh are swamped with director duties, so that leaves kirby in charge. so then ofc when we get home kirbs tries to sweet talk kesh, but she’s just not having it. she’s just like how? anywaysssss at the store we have the most duo of ryan and lexi, plus now i’m added into the mix, and it’s just a mess. like we buy a shit ton of popcorn, pretzels, chips, candy, etc. and we literally bought half the store’s supply of everything lmao. and then dyl and jamie are just in the cereal aisle trying to grab as much cereal as they can. whichever one of them gets we chocolate mini wheats i will love forever. and then kirby’s getting healthy food bc yk he’s trying to be responsible. so then kesh has to explain that his whole job was to make sure everyone else was getting healthy food, not just get it himself lmao. but honestly none of the guys actually know what they’re doing lmao. and then we obviously have to get beaver tails to so lexi and quinner can have a moment, but idk where you get those lol. but yes we will be working out a ton on this vacay, so it’s ok that we have sm junk food lol. and then after we’re done with food, the guys decide to wander the mall and then they just buy a ton of video game and then they’re trying on clothes lol. and yes obvi they’re videoing the whole thing bc they’re secretly middle school girls who want to have a blog lmao

hehe yes me getting chirped the whole trip, esp the boat day. and the guys are getting so embarrassed about it, but i just don’t care lmao. and then the whole boat day is so chaotic obvi. when ryan pushes lexi in, quinner will come back and just be confusion lmao. like where’s lexi. and then i’m dying laughing and then braden sneaks over and pushes me in lol. but yes we all look amazing in our bikinis. like kirby is just so in love with kesh and thinks she looks gorgeous 😍 and then dyl and jamie are just like damn you look hot about me lol bc we’re horny ones on this trip apparently. and i’ll wear a tie-back jolyn bc they actually stay on lol. and then ofc quinner thinks lexi looks super good, but then she tells the story about the last time she wore a tie-back and he’s just like why didn’t you do it again? lmao. ooooh for bikinis i like a black top with a print on the bottoms idk why. and then you guys in whichever color you want. also yes kesh and kirby are trying to be responsible during this, but it’s just not working lol

haha yep i can definitely see you and quinner being wild drunks together (it’s more like when the alcohol is wearing off that you guys get really clingy) so obvi you guys start doing body shots. and ofc it turns into a jamie/dyl competition bc what doesn’t? and then me and lexi are just dancing sexy together, yk like two drunk girls do, and then dyl or jamie tries to come over and cut in and at first you won’t let them but then you finally give in and go dance with quinner instead. and then yeah, no offense kesh and kirby, but y’all are the parents here. like making sure we don’t do anything too too dumb lmao. and also being a wingman for some of the other guys. but you guys def dance together at least a little bit too. and obvi we all look hot

yessss i feel like you and dyl could be super chaotic friends too. so the two of you are just chilling together and then you have to distract him lol, but then after that you have a different chaotic friend for when ryan’s not available lmao

yes yes yes, girl’s day would be so fun. and then we get a ton of cute new clothes so obvi we have to model them. and they’re all just in awe, like those are our girls. but then we also do private modeling shows 😏 and we all know how that ends. and then when we’re in our clubbing clothes obvi they are getting super protective over us bc we look so hot and we’re their girls, so no other guys can get ideas. but then once they’re drunk they’re handsy as hell lol. but then the rest of the vacay ends ups spent in hoodies, sweats, and athletic shorts lol. and obvi some of the guys’ clothes

ughhhh i love this, the whole thing was amazing. 10/10

#ask answered #anon answered #skating anon

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muwur · 4 years ago

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hiii can I request hcs for Bokuto, Oikawa and Kuroo crushing on a shy s/o :3 tyyyy

crushing on a shy s/o

✧ hc’s ✧ for Bokuto, Oikawa & Kuroo

❧ gn reader

✎ 1.6k words

a/n: ty for the request ! <33 idk y everytime its like headcanons mixed w scenario frjffgt i hope das ok w yall my definitions of all these intersect too much--

Bokuto

✧ mans sometimes has trouble knowing people’s boundaries

✧ PERO bby is just being himself, we lov a king

✧ I DIGRESS. N E WAYS

✧ when he has a crush, he just wants to give you a lot of attention

✧ your shyness is just an added uwu factor to him, he craves seeing how surprised you get whenever he just so happens to pop up out of nowhere to say hi!

✧ tbh he spotted you from like a mile away and pretended like he needed to go in the same direction just so he could talk to you--

✧ doesn’t hesitate to compliment you! will ask if you did anything different (you: “not really” ) and then always says “you always look great, anyway, no need to change anything!”

✧ invites you to his games, hyping up his team and insisting that if you come, he’ll play even better because of your support

✧ has to control himself from leaping with happiness and giving you a hug when you respond a bit bashfully, agreeing to go like 👉👈 “oh, sure, ill come” bc a cutie just asked you to come watch him play

✧ however, when akaashi mentioned once that Bokuto might be coming on a bit strong for your more timid nature, he tried to tone it down

✧ but then he got sad thinking that maybe he was actually overwhelming or annoying you and he sulked for three and a half days despite akaashi insisting that you probably didn’t feel that way, otherwise you would just avoid him

✧ you noticed recently he’s been acting a bit off, and it made you a bit sad to see him looking upset

✧ so you decided to make a sign for him for his upcoming game!

✧ you lugged it around with you when you entered the gym, backside facing forward to hide what it said

✧ you were a bit self-conscious, to say the least

✧ you got settled on the bleachers and watched the game

✧ but Bokuto rlly seemed out of his element; he missed a few potential points and the other team eventually got in the lead

✧ thinking that he needed a pick-me-up, you held up your large sign overhead sheepishly during a time out, hoping that Bokuto would notice

✧ everyone on the team started to snicker when they read your “You got this, Bokuto! Go Owls!” and gave suggestive looks to their team captain

✧ he was confused (Bokuto: “why are you all looking at me weirdly??”) until he finally turned around and saw your sign

✧ and fell 10x more in love with you

✧ and now he can die happy

✧ turning back to his team, tears pricking at his eyes, he quietly choked out:

✧ “(Y-Y/n) made that...? F-For me?!?!??”

✧ now that he’s fIRED UP, Fukurodani easily gained back their momentum and won by a landslide

✧ you stood around outside the gym after the game, wanting to congratulate Bokuto and the team but ovERthInkING iT and you were about to chicken out when

✧ “(Y/N)!” a voice called out loudly

✧ and you were met with a crushing hug

✧ never in your life were you more pleasantly surprised and embarrassed at once

✧ Bokuto’s back on his bullshit, always tryna talk and impress you

✧ and everyone wonders why y’all aren’t dating yet cmon just love each other already--

Oikawa

✧ a big tease and a big flirt

✧ never fails to tell you how lovely you look everyday

✧ a bit embarrassed, you’ll always thank him (which he points out is cute, saying there’s no need to be shy)

✧ overall, he’s rlly sweet doe

✧ he was out with his teammates once when he saw you, so he called you over by name

✧ but since you’ve never met any of Oikawa’s teammates, except Iwaizumi, you were a bit hesitant

✧ seeing this, he goes over to you, gently grabbing your arm and pulling you over while reassuring you, “C’mon, I want you to meet my team. I think they’ll like you!”

✧ will introduce you as his friend

✧ however everyone sees through this (except u) and knows boyo wants mor

✧ makes sure to include you in any conversation, asking you for your input

✧ piss Oikawa off

✧ until he rlly does get pissed off and excuses both of you, deciding to just hang out with you because his teammates are meanies

✧ so we may conclude he can be a bit protective

✧ always staring or looking at you, secretly hoping that he catches you looking at him (gets disappointed when once again, no, you were not looking at him)

✧ checks himself in the mirror even MORE now that he has a bit of an infatuation-- (Iwaizumi: *to Oikawa, who is inspecting his face* “you can only do so much to look human, give up”)

✧ politely excuses himself from his horde of fan girls just to talk to you

✧ always trying to find ways to talk to you in hopes you’ll open up more to him and in general

✧ will offer you help even though you obviously do not need any (again, just to talk to you)

✧ and offers you other things he has on himself, like gum

✧ speaking of gum he’ll always have gum or mint on him in general but espeeeeecially if he knows he’ll be around you bc boyo want his breath smelling fiinneee

✧ eventually gets you to be quite comfortable around him (yes!), so you have nice conversations every once in a while

✧ he’s also v considerate and likes gift giving! bought you milk bread from his fav place because he talked about it the other day, and you mentioned you were curious to try it

✧ one time after you told you that you looked pretty, you paid him back with a compliment as well

✧ he got quite flustered himself, trying to hide his blush by turning his face to the side and then excusing himself-- (smooth)

✧ mans just left you confoozed, but you shrugged it off

✧ he digged the compliment tho, it made his heart swell and his ego skyrocket LOL

✧ his crushing gets worse after you start showing up to his games to support and cheer for him

✧ gushes about you mid-game to Iwaizumi, who looks like he wants to off himself every time--

✧ once you’re a bit more comfortable around him and after “hanging out” (Oikawa: “nOT a date oKAY”) a few times, that’s when he thinks he should ask you out (like on a date date c; )

Kuroo

✧ (totally unrelated but i had a weird dream recently where kuroo and i became buddies bc we found each other’s finstas--)

✧ ok im like 99% sure all these bois would love to get some sort of reaction out of their shy crushes cuz they think it’s cute, they just do it in different ways

✧ kuro’s a bit of a tease

✧ but only because he likes to see your reactions, thrives off of them n eats that shit up like salted mackerel-- (not literally)

✧ likes to look in on what you’re doing whenever you’re just minding your own business ( “whatcha got there?” )

✧ gets a bit close to you as he looks over your shoulder (doesn’t matter wut ur height is; this mf tall tho)

✧ will call out your name and wave when he sees you in the distance, then walk over to you and start a conversation, asking you about your day, what you were doing, etc.

✧ will leave his other friends to talk to you, so much for bros b4 hoe5

✧ always respects your boundaries, though. he’s quite perceptive and is able to tell whether or not you’re uncomfortable

✧ and if you are, he’ll do whatever he can to lessen it (sometimes without you even realizing it)

✧ invites you to study with him after school in the library (and thanks the universe when you agree)

✧ tries to be sLICK when y’all are studying

✧ like he’s extra attentive so when you drop your pencil this man zooms for it before you can even blink so he can pick it up and maybe touch your hand as he hands it to you

✧ “oh, you dropped this,” he says, iNNOcENtLY

✧ you just smile and respond with a “thank you, kuro”

✧ may or may not have done this also so you could smile and thank him—

✧ will also try to impress you with his knOwLedGE and is eager to help when you don’t understand something

✧ tries to fix his bedhead ;((( but fails (Issok bb u perfect already)

✧ will kinda flex about his team and being captain (“oh yeah so we’re going to nationals pretty soon”),,, hoping to convince you to come to a game

✧ which,,, you do (much to his content--)

✧ luckily for him, you end up easily vibing with both kuro and kenma

✧ occasionally you see both of them and are comfortable enough to approach and say hi

✧ after a while tho kenma just disappears and ur like ?? where’d he go ?? and kuro genuinely did not know

✧ kenma just wants to give y’all sum alone time,,,, but y’all dont know that (except kuro when he confronted him later n all he got as a response was ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ )

✧ always asks you about your interests, mentally taking notes on them (he believes that info will come in handy in the future)

✧ and he likes to surprise you with the things he remembers (ie. your fav colors, snacks, scents, hobbies, etc)

✧ is kinda comfortable with how things are between you two

✧ but also really want something more; will probs end up asking you out suddenly when y’all are hanging out >.>

✧ embarrassment and uwu’s are shared

#haikyuu x reader #bokuto x reader #oikawa x reader #kuroo x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu reader insert #haikyuu x y/n #haikyuu headcanons #bokuto koutarou #oikawa tooru #oikawa tooru x reader #bokuto koutarou x reader #kuroo tetsurou #kuroo tetsuro x reader #haikyuu hcs

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derl30 · 4 years ago

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ALTERED STATES REVIEW TIME!

OK, this tumblr is, today, a vehicle for me to review ALTERED STATES. And you (the one person who stumbled on this review two-hundred years from n- oh who am I kidding, when the aliens from A.I. who show up to thaw out Haley Joel Osment and the teddy bear who was the real hero of that movie find this) should be very excited about this. Because this movie is insane. And highly entertaining.

Yes, the movie poster looks like ass. If I told you this was a movie where William Hurt (not the William Hurt from that awful 90's Lost in Space remake, or the one who slept through an entire performance as Duke Leto in the Syfy miniseries of Dune. This is before the body snatchers got him) took ayahuasca and got in a isolation tank and it blew his mind so hard he started devolving into a neanderthal and creating dimensional portals and he couldn't stop because he was addicted to finding the truth of existence... Well you wouldn't get that from this poster, would you? So let's move on. Shall we?

The film opens in 1967 with William Hurt's character, psychopathologist Edward Jessup, already immersed in a sensory deprivation tank, whilst his colleague and “buddy” Bob Balaban (he's just Bob Balaban in everything I'm not giving you his character's name look it up yourself if it's bugging you so much) oversees.

Now, you may notice I put buddy in quotes. The reason for that is that Jessup is a self-obsessed ass who seemingly has no reason to be around other people unless he can expound to them one of his various monologues. Bob Balaban barely gets a word in edgewise throughout the entire film. Bob Balaban.

See, Jessup loves the sensory deprivation tank experience. Unsurprisingly, as it allows him to be completely alone with himself for hours.

Later, at perhaps the lamest party ever, a bunch of faculty are chilling out and listening to the Doors. Everyone we see is talking about Jessup. Why? Well, much as Jessup is obsessed with himself, everyone else seems to follow suit by being obsessed with him. One young woman, Emily, (Blair Brown) is introduced to him in this very shot below as he arrives at the party:

Notice how is framed in holy light? There is a closeup after, of him framed in blinding glowing light followed up with a zoom in on Emily's face, enraptured with this incredible dynamic man. So much so that the moment he tries to make a goddamn sandwich she starts grabbing his celery (get your mind out of the gutter) and flirting with him. Which for these two that means talking science, immediately. Talking more at each other than with each other. This is often the way with Paddy Chayefsky's scripts.

PAUSE

Paddy Chayefsky is doubtless one of the great American writers for the screen. He wrote Marty, The Hospital and Network (which is a fucking incredible piece of work). He got an Oscar for all three. He also wrote this movie (Altered States, remember? Good lord) and disowned it completely three weeks in to production. His scripts tend to have very intelligent, driven characters at the center, who monologue extensively at each other. These scripts are not attempting to sound naturalistic.

Ken Russell, however, directed the film. He, like Chayefsky, is top notch at what he does (Direct. I said he directed the film like a second ago, come on keep up). His films, like Women in Love, The Devils, (which was banned in several major countries upon release and has never been shown publicly in its full, uncut form (by the way it's a masterpiece)) the Who's Tommy, Gothic, and Lair of the White Worm are all fucking gonzo nuts. I mean like, when you gave this guy the reins, you were going to Overthetopsville and there will be no stops on this trip. And god bless! I love directors who GO for it!

You're getting the chance to make a movie. Stop hemming and hawing and hit me over the head with what you want to say! Film is a visual medium, USE IT!

I feel I might have made my feelings clear here. So, moving on...

Ken Russell and Paddy Chayefsky immediately started butting heads, right from the start. Chayefsky was a BIG deal, and he wanted control over the picture in a BIG way. Ken would listen to his suggestions on everything to lighting and set dressing, and politely tell him, “No.”, and continue being the director of the film. Chayefsky hated him pretty quickly.

He had much more control over films like The Hospital. Which, if you watch The Hospital, well, it shows. You've got great actors (George C. Scott, Dame Diana Rigg (Dame may be the greatest official title of all time)) saying great dialogue. But its just two very witty bitter people sort of expounding on topics and speaking at each other and suddenly admitting they are in love and discussing what drapes they will have to buy for their new home. It's utterly preposterous, and it doesn't work in the way Sidney Lumet got it to work in Network, by literally making one of the lead characters realize his life is turning into a ludicrous soap opera.

So of course Ken tried to humanize, naturalize, the dialogue sequences. And it works! The film feels more human than the Hospital or Network. Despite the fact that Jessup is literally becoming more and more inhuman throughout the film. One of the ways he does this is by having the character's eat, drink, and work on other things during the dialogue sequences. This is perfectly normal in film, it's called giving the actor “business” to do, during the scene. Chayefsky HATED this. “They are mumbling my precious dialogue! Chewing through it! Sucking it through a straw!” Sorry, Chayefsky buddy. It works for the picture. Chayefsky also felt the actors were too emotional with his dialogue. Right. See, they call that acting.

UNPAUSE

Which brings us back to the first meeting of Emily and Jessup at the party. They are eating during this important scene! I can just picture Chayefsky seeing this, and running to the studio brass to tattle and get Ken Russell fired (as he got Arthur Penn of Bonnie and Clyde fame fired before Ken Russell came on board).

Emily and Jessup are, true to Chayefsky form, extremely intelligent, driven people and hearing them discuss topics such as anthropology and schizophrenia is quite interesting. It's just that what is to come, film being a visual medium, will eclipse just about any dialogue, no matter how good, from our mind thingys.

The two give up on the science talk and go straight to banging on her couch. After, she asks what he was thinking about. His answer is priceless. “God. Jesus. Crucifixions.”

She smiles.

Bwahahaha! Oh Paddy Chayefsky, you sure know women.

He admits he used to have religious visions. She listens to him from the sweaty couch whilst he sits naked on the floor, and starts going on about his father's horrible death of cancer and his loss of faith. And he admits to her that he's a nut. Her response is to call him a fascinating bastard. I think Lucas may have taken notes for Padme and Anakin.

So naturally, they get married immediately.

But none of that matters because Jessup gets back in the sensory deprivation tank and has his first vision. A nightmare of his dying father and lost faith in christianity. It's pretty great, filled with foreboding hospital rooms, his father's face being covered in a burning Shroud of Turin, everything covered by horrible blood red clouds and then THIS FUCKING THING SHOWS UP AND ITS ALIVE AND WRIGGLING

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

excuse me...

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

The many-eyed goat is slaughtered over a gold bible and suddenly Jessups screwing Emily again and we enter a blood vessel looking thing and the vision ends and he never mentions this again. Oh. Okay,

Emily continues on about what a nut Jessup is as they make marriage plans. Her monologue:

“You're an unmitigated madman. You don't have to tell me how weird you are. I know how weird you are. I'm the girl in your bed the past two months. Even sex is a mystical experience for you. You carry on like a flagellant... Which can be very nice, but I sometimes wonder if it's me that's being made love to. I feel like I'm being harpooned by some raging monk in the act of receiving God. (Emphasis mine)

"And you are a Faust-freak Eddie! You'd sell your soul to find the great truth. Well, human life doesn't have great truths. We're born in doubt. We spend our lives persuading ourselves we're alive. And one way we do that is we love each other, like I love you. I can't imagine living without you. So let's get married, and if it turns out to be a disaster, it'll be a disaster.”

It's a disaster.

As in, by the next scene. It starts off happy enough looking, they have kids and people are smiling. And hey, wow it's seven years later! But, well, see, whoops, they are getting a divorce. Well, not they. See, he is divorcing her because he considers the seven years with her a complete waste.

She still loves him, desperately. He doesn't give a shit about her or the kids. He tells Bob Balaban this, straight up. And then starts bugging him about deprivation tanks and Hinchi Indians in South America who have sacred mushrooms that can really fuck you up.

It's at this point you would like for Jessup to be hit by a Mack truck. But the movie continues on. By the way, this is one of the kids he doesn't give a crap about:

That's right. Drew Barrymore's first role is a kid that William Hurt doesn't give a shit about. Something that William Hurt would make a career out of with narcoleptic performances in Lost in Space and Syfy's Dune. So, Emily takes the kids to Africa for her anthropology work while Jessup goes to South America to go deeper into his own creepy mind.

The Hinchi Indians agree to allow him to participate in the drug ritual. They enter their holy cave.

This shot is beautiful. At this point the film becomes increasingly gorgeous. Ken Russell has started to go into overdrive, ladies and gentlemen. Buckle. Your. Seatbelts.

The Indians grab Jessup's hand and cut him, freaking him out. They pour his blood into the drug mixture. They begin to drink. Then he takes a sip. The intensity of the film here has quadrupled. The vision begins, fireworks going off all around him. He sees cave paintings of humans and komodo dragons and this:

The proper life he left behind with Emily. He's convulsing, sweating. The Indians are all around, masked. Snakes. He's laughing in pain. Energy spills from the void. A snake under the parasol strikes and begins to strangle him. He and Emily march toward a nuclear explosion as energy pours from the cut on his hand, becoming a lizard. From within a sandstorm, Emily watches him, naked. Jessup looks at her, entranced, as the soothing sands cover them both, slowly.

It's a beautiful sequence. A perfect film sequence. I can't overstate how strong the vision sequences are from this point forward. Great visual effects work and the madman mind of Ken Russell create something unforgettable, with it's own pace, independent from the rest of the film.

Jessup awakens with a komodo dragon laying before him, ripped to pieces. The Indians and the others all claim he killed it in rage. Jessup remembers nothing, takes samples of the drug to reproduce it, and goes back home.

Back home, Jessup keeps doing as much of the drug as he can and having Bob Balaban record results. They can't up the dosage any more so Jessup hops back in to the self deprivation tank to create a more extreme experience.

In his next session, Jessup states he is having a vision of early man, hunting a deer and killing it. Suddenly he states he is one of them, killing the deer. He begins to grunt like an animal. The two pull him out. He's incredibly pale, blood seeping out of his mouth. He can't speak, and has difficulty breathing. He insists they do an X-ray. It shows that there is a vocalizing lump in the front part of his throat. Jessup claims that his body had begun to revert to a simian state. The medical doctor agrees, stating the throat X-rays looks like that of a gorilla.

Luckily his throat returns to normal. So Jessup finishes up his day by having over a student of his and sleeping with her.

Our hero, people!

At this point we hardly feel sorry for him as his body suddenly begins to twist and bulge in the middle of the night, shifting in and out of neanderthal shapes. It's a horrific sequence, disturbing as hell. You certainly didn't expect the film to shift into body horror.

Jessup feels normal after a while. but sees visions of lava explosions, the birthing of the Earth all around him. Not a good sign.

He goes to pick up Emily from the airport the next day. She asks how he is doing.

“Oh, fine.”

Yeah right.

Emily has been told what Jessup has been doing and is worried, which of course pisses off Jessup even more. The guy is obviously obsessed with reaching the truth and root of existence, much as Emily surmised earlier, and we see he has no fear of even losing his own soul, again true to her word. The only thing that allows us to give a shit about him at this point is that Emily cares for him and she's decent people, okay?

So back Jessup goes into the tank with his ayahuasca or whatever it is. Alone. The tank door opens from the inside.

The hand that pushes it open is covered in thick hair. He's devolved.

Ape-Jessup escapes the tank room and chases a janitor around the building. Again, this scene is fucking freaky as hell. We can't get a good look at this screaming animal that was Jessup.

The janitor gets a guard to help and chases after him into the boiler room, where we finally get a good look at him when he assaults the security guard and escapes.

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Ape-Jessup runs through the city at night, making his way to the zoo where he kills a antelope and eats it. The Ape-Jessup sequence goes on way too long, but is nonetheless unforgettable. The makeup is much more convincing than the above picture suggests, and whoever performed Ape-Jessup did an admirable job.

The cops find an unconscious Jessup in the zoo and bring him in. Emily picks him up and questions him. Jessup admits everything that he can remember. He also admits that he probably killed that security guard. And once again doesn't seem to give a shit. Prick. He calls it the most supremely satisfying time of his life.

Even Emily seems disgusted with him. But, she's also fascinated with what he's accomplished. As an anthropologist, his transformation fascinates her. And so, she agrees to help oversee his next session. Big mistake.

Before the big session Emily and Jessup romantically reconnect, and then into the climactic session we go!

Get your popcorn ready!

After a few hours in to the session, the video monitor shows Jessup begin to literally melt apart like goo, reverting to primordial ooze, the very beginning of existence. An attempt to open the isolation tank doors blasts everyone unconscious, as light and energy pour forth. Emily is the only one left. She sees Jessup's life energy pulse from within the tank.

Rain pours down around them. The pipes on the walls twist and turn like jelly. The ground is covered with a pool of swirling fog and energy. Emily advances toward the vortex of the tank.

In the emptiness of the beginning of everything, Emily seizes the energy before her and reconstitutes Jessup.

They take him home. While he sleeps, Emily rages over the fact that she loves such a insane bastard, and can't get over him. And, then, after Bob Balaban leaves, leaving Emily alone, Jessup wakes up.

He sweetly admits that the truth he learned was that there was no learnable truth, just unknowable horror, and all that's real is human experience. And he'll be a good boy from now on. Well too bad!

Because that horrible truth isn't done with him, and it's back to goo-Jessup! Emily tries to help him, grabbing him, but this in turn effects her, turning her into a shimmering lava form of herself. Both of them begin to self-destruct as Jessup, enraged, watching her in pain, struggles to retake his humanity, slamming himself into the wall, reforming himself through sheer will and physicality. He grabs her and brings her back, mirroring what she did for him during the final session. They embrace naked in the hallway. He finally admits, “I love you, Emily.”

Fade to credits.

Awww true love!

What can I say to sum up? Awesome 80's practical effects. Genius wacko go-for-it Ken Russell directing. Out of this world vision sequences. A awake and actually remarkable performance from William Hurt. An occasionally turgid but often fascinating script by the ever ornery Paddy Chayefsky. Whats not to like?

Well, the ending is a little rushed. The ape sequence goes on for a little too long and takes up perhaps too much of the films overall running time. The central love story is, well... a little hard to swallow, but hey, I guess there really is somebody out there for everyone. Even self-absorbed, deadbeat, cheating, sensory deprivation loving, ayahuasca dropping, Harvard teachers with a messiah complex!

And on that note, aliens from A.I. Artifical Intelligence, have a good day, and don't leave poor Teddy alone with no one to keep him company!

Sayonara!

#altered states #ken russell #movies #review #funny?

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