#literally it knocked out my power right as i was putting this together

[oikawaweon]

fragile ft. fushiguro megumi

pairing: f.megumi x female reader genre: angst/fluff word count: 6,1k synopsis: in a slow, fragile basis of the beginning of your relationship, life with megumi has been nothing but ordinary. and in between drunken confessions, he finds out how you feel destined to be an afterthought, and how much he loves you pains him to see you like that. warnings: college!au, mentions of cheating and self-deprecation, drinking. angst with a tiny bit of comfort. might be ooc idk idc.

if you had to describe your current status with megumi in one word, you'd probably have an internal battle about how to define it.

you wouldn't call it weak because even if you had been officially together for nearly four months now, the way your bond and mutual understanding were getting dangerously stronger every day, you swore you could've trusted your life on megumi the moment you crossed paths with him. it was eager and hot-blooded, and you were unsure about what would be next, but you sure wanted it to be with him and him only.

you also wouldn't exactly call it delicate because the intensity of whatever process you two were crossing now—hands intertwined, still learning about each other—made it a sweet type of harsh and a soft type of powerful, just like the desire to get to know him even more and melt into him.

and if it really had to be one word only, you'd stick with fragile. fragile, because you were still visited by ghosts of past wounds and you knew it was the same for megumi. fragile, because you knew well he had his own trammels and issues, and while you loved that part of him as well, what if love wasn't enough for him to let you in? fragile, because a part of you still found it impossible to believe he could actually fall for you the way he swore he had.

you were at your apartment bathroom, putting on your makeup and finishing the last touches, checking up if anything was missing. suddenly, the little visit that came over a couple of hours ago before you'd go out with your friends knocked briefly on the open door to poke his head inside.

"i was thinking, and maybe... i thought i'd like to accompany you this time". megumi peeped at himself in the bathroom mirror, adjusting a stray of his hair to keep it in place. he was dressed up and hair combed, looking all pretty for you.

you turned your head to look directly at him with undeniable joy and surprise. "there's no way".

"seriously. i'm dead serious". he stared right at you, appreciating your look with amused eyes. you took a step closer to analyze his expression and confirm this was indeed, not a joke.

"who are you and what have you done with my boyfriend"

"but it's me!", he responded with an offended chuckle. "unless you don't want me to go with you, which i'd understand-"

"for god's sake megumi, i'm literally so happy right now you wouldn't understand!", you chanted before jumping into his embrace and smelling his perfume.

he sappily smiled from ear to ear with his eyes shuttled, internally awarding himself for making you happy. oh, how he loved seeing you like that.

now it was a lively evening, filled with laughter, chatter, and the faint buzz of music pulsing through the bar's walls. megumi hadn’t been one to attend many of your mutual friends’ meetings, but tonight, it was almost as if he felt the urge to be part of the crowd, if only for your sake. he knew you'd usually thrive in social situations, smile lighting up the room, and easy laughter filling every empty space with a warmth that seemed to draw people in. and since he, for once in his life, decided to go out with you by his side, tonight you were in your element considering it'd probably wouldn't happen again anytime soon.

by the time the middle of the night was reached, you were starting to get visibly tipsy, your cheeks flushed from the alcohol, and your movements just a little looser and carefree. your partner stayed by your side, engaging in conversation occasionally and offering a sense of security through the place with magnetic energy, keeping you in his orbit. he had poured himself a single drink earlier in the evening—just enough to take the edge off the social setting, but nothing that would leave him out of control. the truth was, tonight he preferred to keep his mind sharp and stay observant, especially at a gathering like this. a part of him knew he had to take care of you, and the other one simply wanted to remember this night out with detail. he held a glass in his hand, nursing it while watching over you, with a drunk itadori blabber-mouthing into his ear. he didn't need more than this.

however, as the night went on, megumi found himself a little on edge. you'd already laughed so hard at some brain-rotted thing toge was talking about, nearly dropping off your glass on the table, only to grab your boyfriend's arm dramatically like he was your lifeline.

“megumiii”, you whispered as loud as you could. “did you hear that one? i think it was the funniest shit ever. i mean, ever.”

“you’re at your limit” he muttered back with a concerned, but amused tone. you scrunched your nose and shook your head with a pout, not paying much attention to what he was saying.

“i’m fine,” you insisted, holding up a finger and pushing it into your chest with such determination that you swore he almost believed it (he clearly didn't). “totally…totally fine”.

he chuckled at your motions, and eventually, sensing you might need a break, your boyfriend gently nudged you and spoke to your ear.

“you know... i'm done with the chill guy jokes now. how about some fresh air?”

you stared at him for a second. "you're seriously so boring", you said with a delighted tone before standing up and grabbing his arm to pull him into you and bring him to the stairs at the corner of the bar.

you waved back at the table with a muttered "we'll be right back", and once you reached the stairs, step by step, he pulled a hand to put a firm hold on your waist to prevent you from falling down, his lips wandering all over your arm giving little pecks wherever he could reach.

once on the second floor of the building, the terrace welcomed both of you with the cool night air, a reprieve from the warmth of the salon downstairs. you clung to megumi's arm, looking up at him with a sparkling, slightly hazy look, one he was starting to recognize as a tipsy declaration of love waiting to happen. you leaned against him, letting out a small, content sigh as he gazed at the streetlights and the stars above.

your eyes wandered for a while before finding a nice spot to spend the time: a balcony, away from the noise and chaos inside. you leaned your elbows on the railing, and while you were gazing out at the city lights, megumi looked at the way the wind tousled your hair, the faint smile on your lips as you swayed a little, and even seemed to notice your distant expression, guessing that you might have started to dissociate and were somewhere far away. he stood beside you, leaning slightly closer and letting the quiet of the night settle around him.

you began talking, idly at first. it didn't matter that much anyway, it wasn't like you would remember any of it tomorrow morning. you rambled about something silly you'd seen earlier that day, making him laugh, and then he would add something he remembered at the moment. both of your words were flowing like a stream with no filter, voices soft and warm.

you stood close together on the balcony, leaning against each other as you looked out at the skyline, your cheeks flushed from the drinks you’d had earlier. the night air was cool, the city below sprawling out like a carpet of lights. you two were alone now, away from the noise, and he found himself drawn into the conversation that had become strangely vulnerable, more layered than he’d expected.

somewhere in the middle of your ramblings, your voice dropped to a softer, almost reflective tone. you laughed, a hint of bitterness coloring the edges, and your gaze drifted down to your hands, fidgeting with a handmade bracelet you paired with megumi during one of your first dates.

"you look like you're thinking too much about something", he uttered while taking off his black leather jacket and gently covering your shoulders, sensing that the temperature was quite lower outside.

you jumped as you fell off of the trance you were in and gave him a tsk. "oh it's nothing".

"if you say it's nothing then it's something that's concerning you. we can talk". he was observing too much and that was making you nervous.

you paused a little before clearing up your throat. was it a good idea to talk about it? was it necessary? really necessary? and then, the drunken eagerness hit you. fuck it.

"do you think that... we're heading into a good pathway?

he took a while to try and formulate a proper answer, wanting as much clarity as possible to avoid triggering a tipsy you. "if you talk about us, about our relationship... i think we are heading into a good pathway. why?"

"sometimes i'm scared this might not work out no matter what"

"what do you mean?", he answered with a concerned look.

“not trying to yapp, but i'm not sure if i've ever told you this, yet…” you began, your voice slurring just slightly as you played again with the charm on your wrist, “sometimes i can't stop thinking about how i got fucking cheated on. it wasn’t a big deal, though,” you shrugged casually as if discussing something as trivial as a forgotten text message. sensing his disquiet look, you kept talking in an attempt to erase the tension. “stuff like that just happens, y'know? at least when you're not much to stick around for.”

your words fell into the silence, each one landing heavily, cutting through the quiet in a way that made megumi realize how his chest was now aching. it was the way you’d spoken so casually, so matter-of-factly, as if it were a universal truth you'd come to accept. although drunk, the way you didn’t even flinch as you spoke, your expression still relaxed, but there was an undercurrent of sadness in your words, something so deeply ingrained that you probably weren’t even aware of it.

“honestly,” you swore you tried to stop yourself from speaking, but there was this odd feeling of needing to spit it out under the excuse of intoxication, your voice low and soft as you now ran your fingers along the metal of the railing. “i should've seen it coming with him. he was… well, he wasn’t perfect, but he was my first boyfriend.” you let out a soft laugh, the kind that didn’t quite match your eyes. “i think i always knew he didn’t really want to be with me, at least not in the way i wanted him to.”

megumi tensed, his grip tightening slightly around the rail of the balcony. he’d never really heard you talk about this, about anyone before him, and he felt a pang of something unfamiliar—a mixture of protectiveness and a strange, almost possessive ache. he kept watching you, trying to read between the lines of the sadness beneath your casual tone, the hints of self-deprecation you tried so hard to hide behind some silly narrative.

you noticed the change in his expression and felt immediately guilty for ruining the vibes of the moment. "i'm sorry for-"

"you don't have to say sorry. you can... keep talking if you... feel safe".

the relaxation slowly filled your body as you freed your thoughts. “he was always looking somewhere else, y'know? it’s funny…” you trailed off before chuckling again after the realization hit, feeling it all absurd now. “i think he only dated me because he couldn’t have the girl he actually wanted.” you shrugged, your expression oddly resigned. “and i was fine with that. i mean, who was i to think i’d be someone’s first choice? so stupidly in love and available”.

megumi felt his heart clench again. he wanted to reach out, to shake you from this idea that you weren't enough, that you somehow deserved less because of who you were. he knew you somehow struggled with self-perception, but he hadn’t realized just how deep it went. and it hurt him to think that, somewhere along the way, you’d convinced yourself that you were unworthy of loyalty, that betrayal was something you simply had to accept.

“y/n…” he began softly, his voice barely audible over the hum of the city below them. he wanted to say something, anything that would shake you out of the spiral, to let his girl see herself the way he did. “you’re not—” he hesitated, unsure if his words could even reach you, especially with the tipsy haze softening the edges of your pain.

however, you didn’t seem to notice the interruption, your voice growing a little distant as you continued, your gaze fixed on some point in the distance. “i always knew, deep down. there was this... odd gut feeling all the time when he’d tell me not to worry, that i was enough… but you know, people can’t help what they feel.” you let out a small sigh, shaking your head as if amused by your own naivety. “i was always the backup plan, and that’s fine. i got used to it. people settle sometimes. but it didn't feel right. and now i feel it so right with you that it scares me to even think of it happening again”.

to hear his precious girlfriend saying those things about herself, so casually and yet so cuttingly, felt like a punch to his gut. megumi could feel his frustration building, not at you, but at the way you dismissed yourself as if you were something disposable, something that could be set aside. his mind raced with memories of your laughter, your intelligence, your cockiness, the way you lit up a room with your energy. how could you not see what he saw? how could you believe you were anything less than fucking exceptional?

he leaned in slightly, his hand reaching out to gently turn your face towards him, his gaze intense, searching his loved one's eyes for something—anything—that might indicate she understood how deeply he cared for her, how much he wished she could see her own worth. “i need you to understand that you weren’t a backup plan to him, and you’re definitely not one to me,” he said, his voice firm but soft, every word laced with sincerity. “i don’t know why he couldn’t see what he had… but i do. i do see you, y/n.”

you looked at him, your gaze softening slightly, and for a moment, he thought he’d gotten through to you. but then, you shrugged with that same dismissive smile tugging at your lips as if you couldn’t quite believe him. “thanks, gumi. but… it’s fine, really. it’s not a big deal. i’m over it, and i'm just drunk. you probably shouldn't take me seriously” you said, your voice light, brushing off his words as if they were just platitudes.

he frowned, feeling a growing frustration—not at you, but at this wall you’d built around yourself, this barrier that kept you from accepting the love he was trying to offer. “you shouldn’t talk about yourself like that,” he said, his voice was firmer now, a touch of impatience slipping through. “you don’t have to dismiss yourself. you don’t have to make yourself small just because someone else didn’t appreciate you.”

you blinked, taken aback by his tone, and for a moment, your guard slipped. but then again, you chuckled, brushing off his words with a playful smile, as if trying to lighten the mood. “megumi, you’re too serious sometimes,” you teased, reaching up to ruffle his dark hair, your expression warm but carrying a hint of something deeper, a sadness you still couldn’t quite shake away.

megumi looked back at you, his hand instinctively tightening around yours, and his voice came out low, steady, holding a softness that he rarely showed up until now. “i… actually thought you were funny the first time i saw you,” he murmured, his words tentative, as if hoping they might somehow shift your perspective, if only by a fraction. “and pretty, too,” he added, his eyes steady on you, willing for you to hear him. "really pretty".

you stood there, your gaze drifting up to meet his, and for a moment, you seemed to register the sincerity in his voice. but your smile wavered as if you couldn’t believe him. “you're tripping,” she laughed, waving it off, your voice light but carrying a trace of disbelief, as if his words were something foreign you couldn’t quite grasp.

“no no, i mean it,” he replied, his tone confident and his blue eyes unwavering. he took a small step closer, his hand reaching up to gently tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, his fingers lingering there, brushing against your cheek. “i thought you were amazing from the start. and i still do.. and i probably ever will. there's so much more i still haven't discovered 'bout you, and it makes me wanna study you for the rest of my life”.

for a brief second, something flickered in your eyes—a vulnerability, maybe? a glimpse of the girl beneath the layers of defense you'd built. you looked at him, really looked at him, searching his face as if trying to find the truth in his words. nonetheless, as quickly as it appeared, the vulnerability faded, and you plastered on a smile, your walls snapping back up.

“thanks, gumi,” you said before leaning in to kiss his cheek, your tone light, almost playful, trying your drunken best to deflect the seriousness of the moment. “but really, it’s fine. i’m over it, i swear” you gave a small shrug, your voice tinged with a forced nonchalance that made his heart ache even more.

he let you laugh and deflect, but his mind was racing since he could understand the baggage you were trying so hard to release. all those scars left by past betrayals and insecurities hurt him more than he could ever put into words, especially because he came too late to prevent you from experiencing it. knowing that you weren't ready to confront those feelings, he didn’t push you any further, less in this state. instead, he simply stayed by your side, letting his presence speak for him, hoping that, over time, you’d begin to believe him. it really frustrated him, the way you downplayed your own worth, the way you brushed off your concerns as if they were something you simply had to endure. he knew you were stronger than you realized and also that you carried so much more beauty and light than you could ever see in yourself.

you stayed on the balcony a while longer, and though your expression remained casual, he could see the faintest hint of something deeper beneath your face, a shadow of the hurt you tried so hard to bury. he didn’t want to pry, didn’t want to push you beyond what you were willing to share, and decided to wait for you, so as you stood there, side by side, he silently vowed to show you, in every way he could, that you were worth more than the broken pieces you’d been led to believe you were.

when you finally made your way back inside, you sobered up, and your head rested on his shoulder as you walked. megumi wrapped an arm around you, holding you close as if to shield you from the doubts you carried. and though you might not remember much of your conversation come morning, he hoped that, on some level, you’d feel the weight of his words, that you would begin to see yourself through his eyes, if only just a little.

at that moment, megumi made a mental note to himself to keep reminding you of your worth and the love he held for you through every small gesture, every silent reassurance until the day he died. because even if he struggled to be expressive, you were worth every effort, every unspoken word, and every moment spent in quiet understanding.

the atmosphere shifted after your quiet conversation on the balcony, but your laughter was quick to fill the silence, your spirits as buoyant as ever as you headed back into the warm hum of the party. inside, the music now thumped louder, people clustered in lively groups, and the smell of smoke and drinks mingled in the air. once you saw the group again, you practically bounced back into the party with them, your arm linked with megumi's as you steered him toward with a radiant smile. you were joyfully unrestrained and had totally forgotten about what had you so petty a while ago, ringing out above the music as if your earlier words had been nothing more than a passing breeze.

megumi, however, found himself seeing you in a different mood, the weight of your confessions lingering at the back of his mind. he watched you as you laughed with your friends, your movements fluid yet slightly unsteady, your smile big and genuine. but he couldn’t shake the feeling in his chest; your words haunted him, your offhanded comments that told him more than you realized. you swayed closer to him now and then, your hand brushing his, and every time you looked up at him with that carefree grin, he felt the urge to lock you in a glass box and shield you from everything that had ever made you feel so small.

you suddenly grabbed his hand, pulling him towards the dance floor with a mischievous glint in your eyes. "come on! just one dance, please!" you pleaded, pouting just enough to make him sigh but follow willingly. it would be just for once, right? and how could he ignore his pretty girlfriend's contagious enthusiasm, her laughter spilling over as she twirled him around, not caring who was watching or how out of sync their movements were? megumi went along with you, a half-smile tugging at his lips as you spun and swayed, your arms stretching out wide like you were trying to embrace the whole world.

but beneath it all, he could see the vulnerability in you—how your laughter was a bit too loud, your smiles a bit too wide. every so often, your gaze would drift, your eyes unfocused for a fleeting second, and he knew you were miles away, lost in thoughts that were far from joyful. then, with a blink, you’d snap back, finding him again in the crowd, lighting up as if he were your anchor.

as the night wore on, both of your energies began to wane, your steps becoming even more unsteady, your phrases turning softer and a little slurred. megumi noticed the faint flush on your cheeks, the way you leaned into him more heavily with each passing moment, your body resting briefly on his as you cackled at something he didn’t quite catch.

“alright, i think we’ve had enough for one night,” he murmured gently, his voice barely audible over the music, though his words were more for himself than for you. after saying your goodbyes with everyone before they took their way home, he guided you towards the exit with one arm around your waist, trying his best to ignore the knowing glances from a few of your friends as they watched him support you. he could almost hear the teasing they’d throw at him the next day, but he didn’t care; all he wanted was to get you somewhere safe and quiet.

outside, the cool night air hit you, and you let out a content sigh, leaning your head against his shoulder with a soft smile. “you’re a good boyfriend, y’know that?” you murmured, your voice sleepy and muffled as you nuzzled closer to him. you giggled, clearly a little too tipsy and tired to remember half the things you’d said tonight, including your own heart-wrenching confessions. but you were blissfully unaware, your smile soft and genuine as you looked up at your boyfriend with half-lidded eyes.

megumi's heart twisted, and he gave a content sigh, gently brushing a loose strand of hair from your face. “yeah? and you’re a good girlfriend”, he replied softly, his voice barely more than a whisper. he wanted to say more, wanted to tell you that he saw everything you tried to hide, but also that you didn’t need to pretend with him. he ended up holding back, not wanting to burden you in this moment.

as you walked, you swayed slightly, humming a tune under your breath, your head lolling from side to side. you rambled on about the night, recounting funny moments and half-remembered jokes, your words slurring just enough that he had to focus to keep up. but he listened to your every word, nodding and laughing with you in all the right places, his arm steady around you as he guided you along the sidewalk.

when you reached his car, you fumbled with the door handle, giggling as you struggled to open it until he gently nudged your hand away and opened it for you. you collapsed into the passenger seat with a satisfied exhale, stretching your arms above your head as you settled in, you eyes already beginning to droop. he watched you for a moment, taking in the soft, peaceful expression on your face, and he felt that same protective instinct rises within him, fierce and unrelenting.

sliding into the driver’s seat, he glanced over at you, his fingers tapping lightly on the steering wheel. you were half-asleep now, your head resting against the window, and he couldn’t help but reach out, giving you a slight peck on the top of your head. you stirred at his touch, blinking up at him with a drowsy smile.

“y'know, gumi,” you murmured, your words barely a whisper, “i’m really happy with you… like, really, really happy.”

his heart clenched, and genuinely smiled, his voice soft as he replied, “i’m happy with you too, y/n.” he wanted to say so much more, to tell you how deeply he cared, how much your words had affected him tonight, but since you wouldn’t remember it in the morning, he stayed shut and appreciated the moment.

as he drove, the city lights blurred past the car, and he glanced over at you now and then, his system relaxing as he saw you taking a little nap on the seat next to him. the way you had such an important conversation, how you two danced right after, and how you were peacefully asleep in his car, letting him drive you home late at night—it made him think. he realized that there was so much you probably kept hidden, so many feelings and thoughts you carried beneath your exterior, and he felt an overwhelming need to protect you from all the bad things in the world.

when they finally reached your apartment, he helped you out of the car, guiding you up the steps as you leaned heavily against him, your little sounds soft and sleepy. you fumbled for your keys, dropping them once before he gently took them from your hand, unlocking the door and leading you inside. you stumbled over to the couch, flopping down with a content sigh, almost falling asleep right again.

megumi knelt beside you, brushing a gentle hand over your cheek. “get some sleep, okay?” he murmured, his voice soft. and after noticing you weren't even considering going to your room, too worn out to move, he picked you up over his shoulder to take you to your bed. he carefully cleaned your makeup from your face, took off your clothes, and put on your pajamas before tucking you under the sheets.

as he watched you drift off, your breathing slow and even, he determined to stay by your side and help you in any way he could. he had no idea of how he would do it but was pretty sure he couldn’t just stand by and watch you suffer in silence. he had to be there, every step of the way, until you realized he was as serious as you to commit, no matter what it took. because you were totally worth it and you made him feel more than anyone had ever done before. he’d show you that you were his first choice, now and always.

megumi wasn’t planning to stay, but as he knelt beside you to give you a last goodnight kiss, your eyes fluttered open, just barely, and you reached out with a sleepy murmur. “stay, please?” you wish was soft, almost pleading, and even though he wasn’t sure at first, he just couldn’t say no to you.

a faint smile tugged at his lips as he nodded, whispering, “alright, i’ll stay for my pretty baby.” you sighed with relief, closing your eyes as you felt him settling into the bed, curling up like it was the most natural thing in the world to have him beside you. after making sure you were comfortable, he lied beside you, leaning back and watching as your breathing slowed again, your face in complete relaxation. a part of him considered moving to the armchair across your bedroom to give you space, but then you shifted, your hand reaching out instinctively to find his, your fingers brushing against his arm as you pulled him to hug you, like seeking the reassurance of his presence even in sleep. you both held a mutual grip that was soft but unmistakable, and it was almost as if you telepathically shared in your dreams how comforted you were by the closeness between each other. you murmured something incoherent in your sleep, a soft smile gracing your lips as you shifted even closer. he felt a wave of tenderness wash over him, sensing you like this, so vulnerable and peaceful. the noise and the lights of the party, the weight of everything—all of it felt like a distant memory in this quiet, cozy moment.

megumi stayed awake a while longer, simply watching over you as you slept. he couldn’t shake the feeling of knowing that you held such a distorted view of yourself. he still couldn't stop thinking about that. your casual words from earlier echoed in his mind. but truly, you were everything to him, and after all, genuine—he hated that someone had made you feel less than worthy.

eventually, the warmth and quiet pulled him under, and he found himself drifting off, his hand still resting near yours, your fingers just barely brushing against each other as he fell asleep cuddling you.

the morning sun filtered softly through the window, casting a gentle glow across the room. you stirred first, blinking groggily as you adjusted to the brightness, your head throbbing slightly from the previous night’s drinks. you closed your eyes for a moment, recalling bits and pieces of the party—the music, the laughter, megumi’s comforting presence… and then something more, a memory at the edge of your mind that felt both familiar and hazy. your face flushed as you remembered small fragments, wondering if you’d said anything embarrassing.

that's when you felt it—an arm resting near yours, warm and solid. you opened her eyes slowly again, your gaze falling on megumi beside you, still fast asleep. his face was relaxed, his usual guarded expression softened by sleep, and you couldn’t help but smile, watching him for a moment in the quiet. it was rare to see him like this, peaceful and ethereal, and a part of you felt grateful that he’d stayed for the night.

but then a pang of anxiety surfaced. did I say something? you wondered, bits of the night coming back in flashes. you remembered his face when you guys talked on the balcony, how he’d looked at you with an intensity you hadn’t quite understood in the moment. had you let something slip? had you told him about… that?

you bit her lip, cheeks warming with embarrassment, but before you could dwell too much, you felt him shift beside you, his eyes fluttering open. he looked at you, a bit groggy but immediately alert, his gaze softening when he saw you were already awake.

“morning,” he murmured, his voice rough with sleep.

“morning,” you replied, your voice a bit softer than usual, still unsure if he remembered everything.

he sat up slowly, rubbing the back of his neck as he adjusted to being awake. “how are you feeling?” he asked, his tone gentle but perceptive as he tapped your forehead with his finger, like he was searching for something that would tell him about your state.

“im… not too bad, actually” you replied, managing a small smile. you looked away, your fingers absentmindedly picking at the fabric of the sheets, still trying to piece together the foggy memories from the night before.

your boyfriend watched you, noticing the way you seemed lost in thought, and he couldn’t help but reach out, his hand resting gently on your shoulder. “baby…” he began, his voice soft but firm, “about last night…”

you tensed slightly, your gaze darting up to meet his. “oh god, did i… did i say something embarrassing, right?” you laughed nervously, brushing it off with a wave, while you couldn't look at him in the eyes from how your heart pounded as you waited for his response.

he paused, studying your face for a moment. “not embarrassing,” he said slowly, choosing his words carefully. “but… you did say something that i don’t think you’d want me to just brush off.”

your smile faltered, and you glanced down, biting her lip. “megumi, i—” your started, but he interrupted you gently, his hand still resting on your shoulder.

“you don’t have to explain anything now,” he said softly. “it's just that… i need you to know that you don’t have to feel like that. whatever happened in the past, it doesn’t change the way i see you now and it's nothing like what we have at this moment”.

your eyes softened, your heart aching as you looked at him, realizing just how much he cared, even if you hadn’t meant for him to know everything. you wanted to laugh it off, to make light of it like you usually did, but something about his gaze told you that he wouldn’t let you deflect this time.

“thank you,” you murmured, your voice barely a whisper as you met his eyes. you felt your throat tighten, the weight of your past bubbling up as you tried to push it back, but his gaze anchored you, reminding you that you weren't alone in this. "thank you for being mine..."

he reached for your hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “thank you for being mine. i’ll be here whenever you’re ready to talk, okay? no pressure.”

you managed a small smile, squeezing his hand back. “i… i appreciate that, gumi,” you responded, wavering slightly. and for this time, you allowed yourself to believe it��believe that maybe, just maybe, you were worth the kindness the world offered. that you deserved the caring and love megumi gave you.

it was all still fragile�� the slow building trust between you, the comfort of his presence, the trust you had on yourself as a partner. fragile. but so it was now the fear of being replaced, because as you sat there in silence, your hand still in his, the weight of every bad memory suddenly felt a little lighter, held together by the understanding and sweet amenity between the quiet morning and who you were now sure, was the love of your life.

a/n: okkk this will be long!! first able, i need to apologize for announcing an angstober only for me to didn't even start it 😭😭 i was really excited for that project but a month ago i suddenly became a functional member of society bc i got called for this student federation team at my uni, got into this research project of bioinformatics and even got called to expose for a congress about some drawings i did to communicate science?? with literal professionals?? as a stem girlie i'm like HONORED but as an individual i'm honestly so tired and i'm so sorry for that... however, i still wanna take care of all the 31 drafts i have on this app so i'll be posting them but i assure you this WILL take long lmao. i post this as a little gift and because i reaaaally wanted to show it off soon. hope you let me know your thoughts on the comments. thank you for all the new people here (and the ones who stayed for a whole month), and i hope you enjoy this as much as i do! xx

[plussizefantasia]

CozyTober day 9: Fall Road Trip

Logan Howlett x f!reader

WC: 1.3k

a/n: this one is so sweet I literally got a headache writing it (wither that or the fact that i haven't had any water today). If you liked it please reblog so other people can check it out, I'll see y'all later for day 10.

You were peacefully reading on the leather couch In your room when Logan opened the door without knocking and threw your wool coat and scarf at you.

“We’re going for a drive, get ready.” And he was gone as quick as he appeared. This wasn’t unusual for Logan, for as long as you’d known him he’d been a man of action. 

Instead of using his words to show he cared he did things, like learn and make your favorite coffee for you in the mornings, or putting Anna’s favorite blanket in the dryer for her when she was in one of her moods, he made sure we always had Charles’ favorite tea stocked and would even bring dinner to Hank if he was too absorbed in his work and forgot to come eat with everyone. 

Even as a teacher, he was always more into hands-on learning than lectures. It’s just who he is. 

So you weren’t surprised at the sudden and unprompted plan change. In fact, you were kind of looking forward to seeing what he had in store for the two of you.

You got ready as quickly as you could and made your way outside to the (admittedly ostentatious) driveway. Logan was leaning against what used to be a gorgeous fountain but was now just a crumbling hunk of stone. Several of the older students had thought it a great idea to see whose power could mess the thing up worse and suffice it to say that the boy who could produce seismic waves when he clapped won the bet. Charles was upset but you had pointed out that he was the one who opened a school for mutants where they didn’t have to hide, and it was a well-known fact that children make stupid choices sometimes.

Despite the fact that the fountain no longer worked and looked quite a bit rougher than any other part of the grounds, it was still one of your favorite places to go. Maybe it was because it was the closest part of the grounds to the outside world, or maybe it was the sense of beauty that you found within the destruction. A beauty that was only being added to by the man leaning against the rubble.

“Are we taking your bike?” You asked as you got closer.

“No, my bike can barely hold me let alone the two of us.”

“I suppose that is what you get for having metal bones.” 

“Ha. Ha.” Logan drawled. “We’re taking the truck it works better for what we’re doing.”

“And what would that be?” You asked trying to keep up with his strides as he made his way to the vehicle.

“Some cute shit. You like that right?” He turned his head to look back at you.

“I guess?” You responded.

He just nodded and kept walking. Eventually pulling open the door for you and offering you his hand so you could boost yourself up into the cab.

He rounded the back of the truck, quickly taking a look at the stuff in the bed. When he was satisfied he pulled down the cover and climbed behind the wheel.

The first several minutes were quite, you gazed out the window at the colors blurring past you. The trees doing that wonderful color changing thing that they did this time of year.

The reds oranges and yellows flowed easily in and out of each other, creating a vision of heatless fire that danced in your eyes. Every once in a while you’d pass an open field and you’d be able to look out upon the expanse of grass.

“Cows!” You yelled as you jammed your finger in the glass of the window. Pointing them out to Logan and grinning ear to ear.

He just chuckled and moved his hand to rest on your jean-clad thigh. Running his thumb up and down your leg while his other hand moved to the top of the wheel and his eyes stayed firmly on the road.

Your smile got smaller but no less real and you moved your own hand to his, intertwining your fingers together and resting your hands on your leg. 

Time both flew by and inched along, words occasionally being traded between the two of you. But for the most part, you just sat and looked and savored the time you had with Logan. Soft radio music in the background is the soundtrack to an afternoon you will not soon regret.

The sun started its descent into the horizon, but Logan did not turn back.

“Lo? Where are we going?” Admittedly you probably should have asked that sooner but you trusted Logan with your life and didn’t think it was that important.

“I told you, cute shit.” Was his complete answer

“That’s not a place, that’s a thing and it’s not even a specific thing.” You shot back.

“Trust me, sweets.” He used the hand still resting in yours to give you a quick squeeze. You squeezed back and took a deep breath. Settling back into your seat and contenting yourself with more window watching. 

That became more difficult when the sun fully escaped your grasp and all were bathed in the inkyness of the sky. Only the truck’s headlights and the dim glow of the radio buttons shine in your vision.

Not too long passed before Logan turned off onto a dirt road, only a single wooden post with a sign your couldn’t read marking its location. 

The truck wobbled and rocked on the uneven terrain tossing your gently back and forth in your seat. The movement ceased and Logan put the truck in park. He threw open his door and walked to the truckbed, pushing up the cover and moving some things around back there.

You simply sat and looked at your surroundings, able to actually get a good look now that you weren’t racing past at 80 mph. It was hard to see in the dark but you were able to make out a post fence with some chicken wire threading through it. You could see the silhouette of trees on each side of you and what you think was a building a little ways away.

Logan rounded the truck to your door and opened it for you once again. Helping you out the same way he helped you in. He led you by your hand to the trunk and when you saw what he had laid out before you you softly gasped.

He had fully decked out the bed of his truck with pillows and blankets, there was an inflated air mattress that he had even covered in a fitted sheet. He had brought a cooler with his and your favorite drinks and some small bags of snacks. 

“Cute shit, I get it now.” You say and turn to Logan who is still holding your hand but trying to look as aloof as possible.

“Yeah, well. Wanted to spend time with you.”

“If you wanted to spend time with me, we could have done that at the Mansion.” you pointed out.

“You like cute shit.”

“I do. I also like you.” You replied.

He says nothing, just moves into your space, and holds his unoccupied hand out for you, nodding his head at the truck bed. I like you too. His actions yell. 

You take his hand and he helps you into the cozy den he’s made. He follows you up and careful not to crush you he lays down and pulls you into his side. He points out he constellations he knows and pretends not to know the ones you point out to him back. 

The two of you fall asleep like that, wrapped up in each other, looking out into the sky and saying nothing and everything all at the same time.

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

I love jack so so much he's perfect but tbh I do think it would've worked much more with the show if he was a destiel baby instead of lucifer's. and I'm not just saying that as a shipper or whatever I mean narratively it would've been a lot cleaner- and actually, I think it would've been super funny to no-homo them creating a baby together, like, literally all they would have to do is say "oh, when cas rebuilt dean after hell he accidentally left some grace tangled in his soul, and every time he's healed him since then it's been growing stronger until a nephilim was born". like yes the studio is homophibic etc etc but all the jokes they'd make about dean being spiritually pregnant would be very funny for me personally.

but ANYWAY, jack's story gets messy and convoluted and I think this would've been like...a simple fix. them worrying about him going dark side could be because they're worried how demon!dean and lucifer!cas affected him in development, the show LOVES bloodline drama, chuck's wanting abraham and issac 2.0 would've worked better this way, dean's storyline with him would be improved, bc rather than 'oh no I slowly but surely emotionally adopted the antichrist' like I think he would've had an easier time clocking his john-behavoir if it wasn't a question whether he was jack's dad or not. plus last time dean actively raised a kid he went to great lengths to keep the supernatural away from him, so it'd be interesting to see how he handles a kid he CANT possibly hide from this part of his life. it would make more sense why michael wanted jack as a vessel- yes obviously he wanted the nephilim power boost but also having him as part of the winchester bloodline, making him a PERFECT vessel he doesn't have to worry about burning up would add a lot. we could also use this argument for why lucifer is so interested in him if anyone actually liked that plotline in season 14 lmao. we know chuck hated cas and dean's relationship, could you imagine if he checked in and found out they made an unauthorized baby together💀 like that really would've given better context for why he hates jack so much. cas wouldn't need that whole weird brainwashing arc to wanna protect unborn jack, PLUS it could've been an interesting source of angst for him- he feels like he's failed once again, creating an abomination and putting dean in danger, but also still loves jack immensely. it'd be so good! also imagine how fucking stressed out heaven would be to find out a mini castiel is on the way. they wouldn't even wanna exploit that kid for power they'd be preemptively treating the headaches they know they're gonna get lmfao.

also. the casting directors literally put jensen and misha into a face morph app and cast the first actor they could find that matched the results. which would've made more sense if,,,,he was just Theirs. the comedy of dean and cas making a baby before either of them managed to admit their feelings to each other would be more fun then the "dude adopted a kid and pawns him off on his unwilling roommate's all the time and they eventually warm up to the kid" storyline we actually got. we also could've replaced some of the jack-dean angst from the show with "dean wants to connect more with jack but he feels shut out whenever cas is around bc he can't relate to any angel stuff so obviously jack's going to cas for help more!", which I think would be interesting!! how AWFUL dean and cas would feel that jack didn't feel safe enough to be a baby. dad!sam is still in full swing but he cares for jack right off the bat instead of trying to use him for his powers at first. lily sunder talking about how cas killed her kid bc he thought it was a nephilim and dean, who's already fully aware he's (spiritually) knocked up by cas is like 👹 inch resting cas-tee-elle tell me more. mary having a 'my baby has a baby' crisis. cas insisting jack looks nothing like him is a running joke but then at some point he explains its bc jack's 'true form' looks just like dean's soul....

ALSO- in a show where, canonically, the very first act of free will was cas falling in love with dean...the physical manifestation of that defeating chuck and taking his place as god? come ON.

[itsabouttimex2]

Can I ask how the lmk characters would react if your childhood cat ran away and I mean that you’re very very very close to the cat.

Because my childhood cat Leo just ran away and I’m having a massive meltdown because of it and crying so much.I already watch one cat die I can’t lose another and your work’s always bring a smile to my face and I really need something to get my mind on something else right now.

(I’m sorry to hear that, dear. Trouble with pets is never fun. I hope things get better.)

Missing Pet Reactions

Sun Wukong, Mei, Sandy

Sun Wukong has never really had a “pet”- but he does have a whole mountain of monkeys ranging in age and disposition. I imagine he understands quite well the panic of one going missing for more than a few minutes.

So he sympathizes. He understands.

And the moment Wukong sees the tears beading in your eyes as you desperately recall the circumstances of your pet going missing? He’s on the move.

Even if the Great Sage didn’t have his Golden Vision ready to track down your pet, he still has the power to create clones en masse. A storm of ginger simians down every street and road, knocking on windows and doors with their bold hands.

The real deal will stay beside you while his clones “shred” the city with haste, taking a moment to calm and shush you with the biggest grin he can manage.

While they search, Wukong encourages you to snack on whatever you'd like in his pantry (though it's nothing but junk food...) to keep your stomach full and settled. He’ll bust out a peach soda for you and settle in with a blanket, and wait out the literal handful of minutes that it takes to his clones to return your pet to you.

Mei has her own way of “tearing” the city apart, mainly through her use of her expansive follower base. All it takes is one text and there’s a few thousand eyes on the streets, looking for your little fur baby.

She’s also personally out on her motorcycle, zipping up and down backroads and busy streets to find your furry friend and bring it home.

The dragon girl is split pretty fifty-fifty between taking you along and leaving you behind, but will lean either direction depending on how hysteric you are. She might just throw you onto the couch and slam the door behind her as she races out, throwing you a credit card and instructing you to order something for dinner.

It’s not that she wants to leave you all alone in this state of distress, but Mei prioritizes your safety above your comfort, as it happens. And besides… if you’re fear-snacking on pizza and soda by the time she gets back (with pet in tow), then the two of you basically get to celebrate together immediately. Win-win!

…she’s absolutely recording the tearful reunion, though.

Oh, no one is going to be more on your side through this than Sandy. His dozen therapy cats? His little Mo? The big blue softy so sympathetic to your plight that he has to fight back a few tears of his own.

Now, I have no doubt that one or two of Sandy’s cats have gotten out here and there, only to be quickly returned by the call of dinner or his frantic pleas- the ex-soldier knows all about luring little wayward pets back home.

Freshly popped tuna cans and cats treats are scattered about the yard and deck, and then Sandy puts out two chairs and a platter of snacks to go with the tea he brews for you.

For this gentle giant, it’s only a matter of waiting- he knows to stay calm, to calm you down, to just… wait.

Out of all three, his plan works the best, just because there’s not a frantic chase or a surplus of noise to make things worse, or to frighten the cat further. In less than an hour, you’ve got your buddy back.

So basically, Sandy has the knowledge + temperament to get your cat back without harm or a pointedly long lapse of time spent futilely looking in the wrong place. 10/10!

[lunar-wandering]

was in discord contemplating how they're gonna bench Wukong next season, thought about it having to do with Wukong holding back (which has been brought up three times and brushed off every time), and accidentally unlocked my angst abilities at full power

(transcription of discord screenshots under the cut)

another way of going about it* (*Wukong being benched) instead of Wukong holding back more, is that the effects of chaos magic make it harder for him to hold back- aka he starts isolating himself again because he can't control his abilities and he doesn't want to hurt them-

it'd be kinda similar to how i wrote sick Wukong that one time- with him accidentally breaking things, while trying to claim that everything's fine, while staying far away from everyone as possible and avoidign physical contact

MK tries to like. tackle him because he's acting sus and he wants to know what's going on. and Wukong dodges out of the way- but accidentally both leaves a crater in the ground from his movement and shatters any nearby glass objects cause of the amount of energy he accidentally used

tries to lock himself in his house. the door breaks off while he's trying to lock it. he puts a barrier over top of the house- effectively trapping himself inside a barrier of his own creation instead

if it's like a theme of the season theres a whole chance MK is dealing with being unable to keep his powers under control too- the difference is that while he's scared of hurting his friends, the others are definitely one hundred percent capable of reassuring him that everythign's going to be fine and that they can handle it they can't do that with Wukong because he has experienced literally THE worst case scenario from lack of holding back-

OH AND ALSO. IF MACAQUE IS CORRUPTED BY CHAOS MAGIC AND IS BEING A VILLAIN AT THE SAME TIME. THIS SITUATION BECOMES SO MUCH WORSE HELLOOOO MK and the others banging on the barrier trying to get Wukong to come out, we can deal with this together Monkey King- MK: you're not dangerous, Monkey King- Corrupted!Macaque, emerging from the shadows: Ohoho, but he is. Tell me, surely you've wondered why your mentor was so keen on holding himself back? and like. starts going into this whole speech as Wukong is hunched over inside the barrier, clutching at that arm- Corrupted!Macaque: he's not the great hero you think he is, bud, and neither are you- Wukong: enough! full out shatters the barrier, leaps out, pins Macaque to the wall- PARALLEL TO THAT SCENE IN S3EP10- and suddenly Macaque glitches out a bit, and he looks scared, and Wukong hesitates, and it's like- Macaque: Wukong, please! I can't contro- and then glitches again and- Corrupted!Macaque: Haha! So, the great Monkey King is going to kill his friend again, huh? and Wukong fully recoils, and just, the others reactions cause they didn't know about this- and Corrupted!Macaque using that to his advantage like- Corrupted!Macaque: look at their faces. they're afraid of you. as they should be, you demon-

Wukong being caught off guard and getting hit by a blast of chaos energy and just slamming into a wall and then onto the ground- rocks fall down and cover him up, and Corrupted!Macaque starts slowly walking towards him (parallel to how Macaque walked in s3ep9 before he grabbed Mei) and then MK is there, staff also crackling with chaos magic as he slams it into Macaque's side, knocking him away. full out "Don't touch him!" level anger from him. and we get like. this little standoff. and then Corrupted!Macaque does this pained-looking bow and fades into the shadows again. MK turns away and runs over to where the others are shifting rocks off of Wukong, who eventually slowly shifts, pulling himself up a little so that he's on his hands and knees instead of laying down. MK asking him the typical stuff, if he's okay and all that, and then, hesitantly… "…He was… lying, right? Just- saying things to get under our skin?" Silence. MK: …Monkey King? Wukong, quietly: …….I've done a lot of things that I regret, kid. and then, ignoring the others yells for him to sit down- he's injured- hold on, wait a moment- Wukong pushes himself into a standing position- and then gets on his cloud and leaves. (another s3 parallel).

[soapsilly]

Bad Memories - Roronoa Zoro Imagine

Pairing: Roronoa Zoro x Reader

Spoilers for One Piece (?)

Summary: (Y/N), a black market dealer, begrudgingly joins the Straw Hats after having to admit to herself that a strong crew would help her reach her goal faster. However, being on a ship with the pirate hunter Roronoa Zoro brings back some old memories she'd rather not be reminded of.

Requests are closed

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"Oooooh, what is this?", Luffy reached out to the mysterious object that was displayed on one of the countless shelfs.

"If you touch it, you buy it", (Y/N) spoke up from where she was leaned over the counter, trying to figure out what it was the cyborg wanted from her.

Franky needed a very specific tool to modify parts of the Sunny. A tool he didn't have and didn't necessarily could get easily as it was classified as marine technology.

"That's a very unusualy request you got there", she furrowed her brows.

Nami knew what that meant - when vendors said something along those lines what they usually meant was 'that's gonna be price-y', but the red-head prided herself in being a pro in haggling down any price however high it may be.

"Listen, I know what that means. I also know that that's bullshit. So you better make us a good price because we're going to get that piece one way or another", the navigator tapped her finger against the counter top.

"Oh, that's not what I meant", the dealer shrugged, "I literally meant nobody ever asks me for those things. Most people don't even know they exist. I'm not trying to get rich here, however, I will get a reasonable price for it or you can go and find the tools you need somewhere else"

While the two were talking finance, Franky was already tinkering around with the newly attained pieces and Luffy was doing god knows what.

"Is that a Devil Fruit??", Luffy's voice reached them from somewhere out of the depths of the storage room.

"Yes, do you want it? I'll make you a good price", the dealer yelled back.

Within seconds the Rubberman was at their sides again.

"YES! Nami, please can we? Usopp would love that! Or Chopper!"

"Chopper already has a devil fruit power!", the red-head yelled back.

"Oh. Right. Then for Usopp!"

While the two of them startet arguing about whether or not they'd need another 'idiot' with devil fruit powers on the team a tall blonde guy almost kicked in the door to (Y/N)'s storage.

"We need to leave! The stupid marimo started a fight in the city and now a bunch of marines are here-", it seemed like the man wanted to say some more but stopped talking once he saw the woman behind the counter, "Oh, beautiful lady! Mon Amour! My name is Sanji and I'm-"

"Wait let me get this right... some dumbass from your crew starts a fight with the marines and the first thing you do IS RUN BACK TO MY WAREHOUSE?!", the dealer was furious, "You need to leave. Now!"

(Y/N) started to frantically pack together the most important things, so that once the marines should really try to barrel down her front door, she'd be set to make a swift exit out the back.

"Just come with us!", the Straw Hat exclaimed happily, "you have so much great stuff here! Having someone on the crew who can find all those things would be so cool"

"No", her voice was icy, "I've known you for thirty minutes and you already put my livelyhood at risk. I think I'll pass" - that there was a whole nother reason the dealer didn't want to join the notorious pirate crew, she decided to keep to herself.

From outside the voices and footsteps from what (Y/N) could only imagine were dozens and dozens of marines grew louder.

"We need to leave", Nami commanded, "Sanji take her stuff"

"Of course, Nami-swan~", the blonde did as he was told and grabbed the huge sack filled with all kinds of things from the dealers hands. Not a minute too late as there there was a loud knocking that disrupted the womans attempts of resistance.

The Straw Hat as well as the Cyborg already adopted their fighting stance when the navigator held them back yet again. (Y/N) asked herself, who it actually was that was in charge here, but she didn't mind as she wasn't particularly eager to have a battle with god knows how many marines in a confined space.

"Is there another way out?", she turned to (Y/N).

"Follow me"

************************************************************************

Once outside all they had to do was to leave the place without making a fuss - a task seemingly unmanagable for Monkey D. Luffy. They weren't even 30 feet away from the warehouse when Luffy's loud voice could be heard all over the place.

"Oi, those aren't even that many. We could've taken them!" - followed by the even louder 'clunk' that Nami's fist made when it made impact with his skull.

"Shut up and just run!", she yelled at him. And they did. Every now and then a low ranking marine officer would catch up with them but either Franky or Luffy or even sometimes (Y/N) herself would take care of that. It was when one of the captains came dangerously close to them that they had to worry.

When (Y/N) started to notice the blonde guy fall behind, struggling with carrying her belongings and fighting off the marines at the same time, she realized that those things needed to go.

"Hey! Drop the sack! It's slowing you down", she yelled over at him.

"No, no! It's fine!", he yelled back, "I only fight with my legs anyways! Your belongings are safe with me"

"Doesn't matter. Drop it. It's not worth the risk", she insisted.

"Are you sure?", Nami sounded shocked, "I saw what you had in the shop. That stuff is worth a fortune! Sanji, don't you dare!"

"I don't care!", the dealer yelled back, "I'll get new stuff. If it makes you happy, you can keep whatever you can carry. Drop. The. Sack!"

For a moment the tall man hesitated but then did as he was told. As soon as he dropped the added weight, he immediately spun into a roundhouse kick, hitting an approaching opponent directly in the head to give the group time to bring some space between them and their followers. When (Y/N) stopped abruptly and started running back to where her things were scattered around Nami was almost sure the other woman had come to her senses but (Y/N) went straight past the incredibly expensive looking jewelry, the intricate tools and even the devil fruit, that Luffy was begging Nami for. Instead she was frantically sorting through the depth of the now half-empty sack.

"What are you doing?", Nami screamed at her, "whatever you're looking for you better find it quick!"

The marines were quickly catching up but (Y/N) still hasn't found what she was looking for.

"Hah! Found it", she yelled but as she was getting up she came face to face with the vice-admiral. However, she didn't even have the time to react or make a game plan as a fist whizzed past her, sending the marine flying. As soon as the fist appeared, it disappeared again. (Y/N) had heard about the Straw Hat Luffy's rubber abilities but she never would've guessed that they'd save her ass one day. She didn't allowe herself the time to dwell on it as she was sure that this punch would merely slow the captain down.

When they finally reached the ship the rest of the crew was already waiting for their mates. As soon as everybody had boarded the Thousand Sunny, as (Y/N) had found out the ship was called, the cyborg used a maneuver called coup de burst, which catapulted them to safety.

Once everything settled down, it was time for the crew to introduce themselves.

"Oi, everybody! This is...", Luffy trailed off once he realized that he had no idea what the girl's name was.

"Oh um.. it's (Y/N)"

"Guys, this is (Y/N) and she's going to join our crew"

(Y/N) furrowed her brows, "I'm not! You saved me back there and I'm thankful but you're also the reason I was in that situation to begin with. So I think it evens out. Just drop me off on the next island or... just... anywhere is fine...", she grew quiet towards the end.

"What? No! Our crew is great I promise! We'll find the One Piece and I'll be pirate king!"

"I don't care", she really didn't want to be there.

But Luffy wasn't know for his ability to take no for an answer. And so he kept throwing new points and arguments at her to make her change her mind. She didn't know what it was that did the trick in the end. Was it his determination? Or the things she's read and heard about the crew? The things they already accomplished? She simply didn't know. What she did know, however, was that reaching her goal would become much easier with some powerful allies by her side.

"Great", Luffy sounded happy, "so let me introduce you to everybody. You already know Nami. She's our navigator. That cool cyborg is Franky. He's our shipwright. This", he pointed towards the tall guy, that Nami had called Sanji before, "is Sanji. He makes the best food you've ever eaten"

"What's your favourite meal (Y/N)-san? I'll cook it especially for you tonight - to celebrate you joining us. Another beautiful lady on the ship ~"

(Y/N) was a little unsure how to react to the cook's advances but sent him a polite smile regardless.

"Don't worry, he's always like this. You'll get used to it", Nami assured her, "and if you're smart, you'll even figure out how to use it to your advantage", she sent the other woman a wink.

The black market dealer didn't get to answer though as Luffy continued. (Y/N) largely drowned out the words - like the ship's doctor insulting their captain for calling him a good one or the sceleton man asking her for the colour of her panties. She'd get to know them soon enough anyways.

"So and that's - "

"The pirate hunter Roronoa Zoro", (Y/N) finished for the Straw Hat.

"Oh, you already know each other?", Nami raised an eyebrow.

"Your reputation precedes you", the woman answered almost... bitterly?

"Oooh looks like somebody has a fan", the long nosed guy - Usopp - started teasing the swordsman.

"I wouldn't say that", (Y/N) mumbled as she left the crew standing.

************************************************************************

"Hey, (Y/N)! Can I talk to you for a sec?", Nami walked up to (Y/N), who, at the moment, was sitting down near the railing watching the water.

The girl raised her brows to show the red-head she was listening, but remained silent for the time being.

"You know today, when you ran back for your stuff, I really thought you finally came back to your senses but you didn't go for all the valuables... why? All you saved was this... book?"

The other woman just shrugged, "I got what I wanted"

"At first I wasn't sure what it was, you were looking for but then I talked to Sanji and he told me he's seen that kind of book before. A devil fruit encyclopedia... Why is it so important to you that you couldn't leave it?"

"Listen, Nami. I'm sorry I put you all in danger but I needed that book"

And with that the black market dealer left the navigator standing.

"She's even worse than Robin", the red-head mumbled to herself.

************************************************************************

It's been a few weeks since (Y/N) joined the Straw Hats and for the most parts it's been uneventful. For the first week or so she preferred to keep to herself but it was Sanji especially that wouldn't accept no for an answer whenever he told her to come eat dinner with the crew. But even then she made sure to always sit at the far end of the table to bring the most distance between herself and him.

She hadn't spoken a single word to the swordsman since setting foot on the ship and she was thankful that he didn't seem to care about trying to either.

"Don't mind the stupid Marimo. He's a brute. He wouldn't even know how to talk to such a beautiful flower as yourself ~", Sanji would regularly tell her but she'd just send him a tight smile and change the topic.

At the moment, she was sitting on deck tinkering around with Franky. She wasn't the best at crafting but she knew the tools so playing his assistent wasn't the worst past-time.

"I'm glad we got that tool before the marines stormed your warehouse", the cyborg told her, "I'm gonna build us some suuuuper cool stuff with it"

(Y/N) was just about to hand him another wrench when Zoro passed them on his way to the crows nest. During her time there she noticed that the lookout kind of was his personal training space. Of course, everybody was welcome to use it but nobody spent as much time there as the pirate hunter so she made a mental note to always stay clear of it. Her eyes lingered on the taller man's back as he passed them.

"(Y/N)!", Franky's voice pulled her back to reality and she had to pull herself together to not drop the wrench she was holding. This couldn't keep going like that. If she got distracted during a fight things might end up ugly - she knew that much.

************************************************************************

"Come with me?", he held out his hand to her knowing exactly that his question was only a formality. There wasn't a chance in the world that (Y/N) would ever let him leave without her - or quite frankly the other way around.

"You're insanse", she laughed but grabbed his hand without hesitation. They've known each other since they were only children - it was never a question of if but rather of when they'd finally get together.

"But you know you love me", he grinned at her, pulling her into his chest for a playful kiss.

She woke up and for a moment she felt at peace with the world, wanting to turn around snuggling into her pillow again. The rhythmic sound of breathing in the room calming her into a state of betweent sleep and being awake. But then she remembered... These breathing sounds weren't his. In fact, it was all just a dream.

Confronted with the harshness of reality she didn't feel like sleeping anymore, afraid of yet another dream that would give her a false sense of familiarity. Instead she slipped into a cardigan and decided to get some fresh air.

Once outside on deck, she took a deep breath. She enjoyed how cold the air was in those morning hours. The sun was just starting to rise - not even enough to paint the sky in these pink and orange tones she found so pretty.

"Couldn't sleep again?", the gruff voice made her jump. It was the first time that Zoro had spoken to her since she joined the crew but that didn't mean she wasn't familiar with his voice. It was almost involuntarily that her ears almost instantly perked up and her heart started racing whenever he started speaking around her. He triggered her fight, flight, freeze instinct and to her demise it was always freeze.

"Had a bad night", her voice was coarse.

"Seems to happen often"

She furrowed her brows. What was his deal? As if he could read her mind, Zoro continued.

"Out of the last five weeks, I was on night watch twelve times. And you were awake for at least ten of those times. And those were only the times I noticed"

"I-", she swallowed, "Being on a ship again just brings back some memories I haven't thought about in a long time..."

She didn't know why she told Zoro of all people but she couldn't take it back now anymore anyways...

"You've been to sea before?"

She let out a dry, humorless laugh.

'I don't want to talk about it. At least not with you', she thought to herself.

What she said instead was, "My fiance was a captain - My captain to be specific"

Zoro raised his brows, "You were engaged?"

The memory was bittersweet. She smiled sadly. The swordfighter noticed how pretty she was eventhough her smile didn't reach her eyes.

"We were young", she shrugged.

"So it ended badly I take it?", there wasn't a hint of empathy in his voice. What did she expect? Getting involved with your captain rarely ends well.

"Let's talk about something else...", she knew Zoro's mind probably immediately went to heartbreak but if she had the chance, she'd do it all over again as long as he was with her.

"You've been avoiding me", he stated, "why?"

Zoro wasn't a fan of beating around the bush. Of course he had noticed that the girl went out of her way to never having to interact with him in any way. He didn't sweat it though. He wasn't desperate for a new friend. If there was a new team mate, so be it. Didn't mean they had to like each other. What he was curious about, however, was why she seemed to apprehensive about getting to know him.

"I guess I just didn't want to risk starting to like you", she shook her head knowing how ridiculous that sounded.

Zoro furrowed his brows. From all the possible answers he could've gotten, this wasn't one he'd have expected. He was almost a little offended now.

"You didn't seem to mind getting to know the others"

"That's different", she sighed. He noticed how exhausted she looked.

"You knew me when you first joined the crew", he continued.

"Doesn't the whole world know you by now? The Straw Hats are notorious"

He didn't take this for an answer.

"You know as good as me that this is something entirely different. What I don't know, however, is what I did to you"

"Of course, you don't", she laughed bitterly. She knew that she wasn't fair to him. She didn't expect him to remember but she couldn't help it. Zoro blinked a few times, trying to figure out what it was the girl was talking about.

She sighed, "Do you ever have any regrets about being a bounty hunter in the past?"

He had never thought about that but he slowly shook his head after thinking about her words for a few seconds. He still wasn't sure what she was on about but he wanted to understand.

"I don't believe in regret", he answered. There wasn't anything he could do about his past. Back then he never would've thought that he'd ever become a pirate himself after making a name for himself as the pirate hunter Roronoa Zoro but what happened happend. He tried not to rack his brains over it.

"Well, I do", she mused.

"(Y/N)", he wanted to tell her to just tell him what's going on but hesitated once he saw how she tensed up when her name left his lips. He almost felt bad for her, she looked so helpless. It wasn't like him to feel like that but something felt different about this situation.

"Nomi Malik", she sighed, "I don't suppose the name rings a bell..."

At first, Zoro wasn't sure who she was talking about. She could see his eyes moving trying to remember but then his brows creased just the tiniest bit. He did remember. Nomi Malik was one of the last pirates he caught before becoming one himself.

"Yes, I remember. Devil Fruit User... not very strong though. What about him?"

His words stung. They were true, of course they were. And then again they weren't. Malik wasn't weak. He had a hefty bounty on his head - otherwise Zoro wouldn't have wasted his time on him and his crew but the swordsman was extremely skilled - even before he became one of the Straw Hat Pirates. She didn't blame him stating the obvious though. When she visibly struggled to find the right words, he continued.

"Did you know him?"

'That's an understatement', she thought to herself.

Instead, she just nodded. He stayed quiet waiting for her to continue. He noticed the sun was starting to rise, casting a golden hue upon her features.

"We grew up together", she turned to look towards the horizon, "I can't remember a time when he wasn't there... well, except for now, of course..." - she got quiet upon the realization - "when he asked me to join him, it wasn't even a question"

Zoro raised his brows. He knew he didn't remember every single person he ever hunted down but he was sure that (Y/N) was never one of them.

"If you were part of his crew...", he tried to vocalize his thoughts.

"Then why didn't you catch me along with the rest of his crew?", she finished his question for him, "well, I hadn't had a bounty back then. I was completely irrelevant to you"

"So, where's he now? Impel Down? You know Luffy broke half of the inmates out a few years ago... He could be out there somewhere...", Zoro shrugged. What had happened to her was unfortunate but he just did what he had to do to survive. To say he felt bad would be a lie.

The girl opposite of him slowly shook her head though, "Wanted dead or alive...". She emphazised the word to show him that the marine truly didn't care. Either option was fine with them as long as there was a pirate less roaming the sea.

The swordsman was taken aback. What reason would the marines have to do this? They had imprisoned pirated way more powerful than Nomi's crew.

"No, that-"

"I was there", she cut him off, "I followed you when you handed them over. Right outside the marine base"

The smile returned on her face as she stared off somewhere into the distance.

"You were incredibly skilled even back then... of course there's no comparison to now... after your training with Mihawk, I mean"

Zoro knew he was good but the praise didn't feel as great as he was used to. At the moment, the only thing he felt was a weight upon his chest. He never felt remorse for his enemies but he was also never confronted with their surviving loved ones before. Most people thought of Zoro as cruel, heartless, a brute but that wasn't necessarily true. There were people he cared about - he just didn't show it. Besides, he knew how it felt like to lose someone.

"What happened?", he asked her, still not sure how thinks could've escalated.

"Malik was a lot like Luffy in a sense. Adventurous, fun-loving, great leader - stubborn though. There was no way he'd let himself and his crew get captured without a fight. He became a pirate for freedom. To see the world. He couldn't have that behind bars. I don't think he seriously thought he'd stand a chance. It was just his- I mean our crew against the whole base"

She made her way over the battlefield towards her lover. Slow. Too slow for her liking. For every yard she made she had to fight off two or three marines. Granted, most of them were only low ranking officers but there were too many for her liking. But for a moment things looked like they were turning in their favour - or at least favourable enough. Starting a fight was smart. If they played their chances right they could flee in the commotion.

From across the battlefield (Y/N)'s and Malik's eyes met. He sent her a darin wink looking as handsome as ever. She couldn't help but let out a hearty laugh. Only her daredevil of a boyfriend could make this high stress situation somewhat romantic. 'I love you', he mouthed over to her but she didn't get the chance to answer anymore as a new wave of marines stormed the plaza in front of the base.

As more and more marines flooded the place it became harder and harder for (Y/N) and her crew to hold out against their attacks. When the first one of their crewmate's bodies hit the ground (Y/N) knew there would be no fleeing. She loved how loyal her lover was. Loyal to her and to his crew. But this also meant that this fight would have to end - one way or another.

The blood was rushing in her ears as (Y/N) witnessed more and more of her crewmates being critcally hit. Her friends. People she grew up with. Good people. She stood still for a moment. She saw Malik's first mate lying on the ground a few feet ahead of her. She and him used to play cards together. It was him who taught her the rules of the game and it was her who showed him how to cheat people out of their money by bending even those rules. Next to her their navigator crashed to the floor. (Y/N) knew him since she was a little girl. He always knew the best routes and alleys to get away from the vendors that would chase after them when they yet again decided to steal candies and little toys from them. Nobody knew their little village as good as him. She felt helpless - lightheaded almost - but she didn't have the luxury of taking the time to mourn her friends as she had to focus on getting ahead. Closer towards were Malik was fighting against a vice-admiral at the moment.

Her captain was a devil fruit user but his powers didn't seem to have any effect on the vice-admiral. (Y/N) knew this could mean one thing only - this guy's Haki was way stronger than Malik's. She knew she needed to get to them. She was aware that she couldn't be of much help, even without his devil fruit powers Malik was much stronger than her but whatever they did, they did it together.

She was still busy fighting several marines when a loud slashing sound followed by a muffled scream cut through the air. (Y/N)'s head whipped around just in time to see Malik's body hit the floor as well now. After the vice-admiral made sure the other male wasn't in any shape to get up and continue the fight, he just left him there to bleed out and die.

The ringing sound in (Y/N)'s ears was back and everything seemed as if it were in slow motion. As fast as her legs would carry her she hurried towards were her lover was lying in the dirt - the fight forgotten. A patch of his own blood staining his clothes growing bigger and bigger by the minute.

"Malik!", she screamed his name, tears already forming in her eyes. As she finally reached him, she wasted no time immediately sliding on her knees pressing her hands on the deep wound on his torso.

"It's okay now. I'm here. It's going to be okay", she babbled probably more to soothe herself rather than the dying love of her life beneath her.

"Baby... Ba-baby, listen. You need to leave", eventhough she could see in how much pain he was, the man - her captain - still send her a reassuring smile. His teeth and lips were already coloured red from his own blood but he still looked so incredibly handsome to her. He was still her Malik.

"What? No! Why would I do that? I'm not leaving you", the tears were now streaming freely down her face.

"You don't have a bounty. They don't even know who you are yet. This is your only chance. Please, I'm begging you. Leave"

How come all of them had to die while (Y/N), who was less strong - less experienced - got to live? It didn't seem fair to her. She shook her head making the tears fall everywhere from the motion. She wouldn't leave. If her whole crew, her captain, the man she loved with all her heart had to die, she'd go with them.

"What are you saying there?", she smiled through the tears, "We're in this together. I'm not leaving. I'm not", she repated the last phrase over and over again. Malik tried to gently interrupt her ramble but she wouldn't have it. It was almost like she didn't even hear him. It was only when he finally raised his voice that she fell silent and really listened to what he was saying.

"I don't have much time left, so listen to me now. I'm still your captain so you gotta do what I tell you", he tried to sound serious but failed knowing that their relationship has always been grounds for teasing within the whole crew and even among themselves. Even now, whilst being in pain and bleeding out, he never lost his happy spirit she fell in love with. She was reminded of the reality of the situation when his happy laugh soon turned into a hurtful cough, "I love you. I've loved you forever. And I always will. I'm sorry I never got to make you my wife. I'm sorry for being too stubborn. I'm sorry for everything"

There's so much she wanted to tell him. That there was nothing to be sorry about. That she'd do it all again. That she loved him more than anything. But all she could do was sob and put pressure on his wound to try and slow down the bleeding.

"Please. You need to leave now. I'll be fine - it's like going to sleep. It's easy. But- but I need you to be fine as well", he nodded up at her as she felt his hands on top of hers moving them away, releasing the pressure she was putting on the lethal wound on his torso. As soon as her hands left their place the blood started gushing and spilling over his body, making the pool of blood he was lying in rapidly increase in size. She cupped his face with one of her hands, stroking through his hair with the other, staining both in the process. Still crying she leaned down and pressed one last kiss on his lips that were already starting to become cold from the blood loss. The kiss tasted like the blend of her tears and his blood - salty and like iron. For a moment only him and her mattered. She knew those were the last moments that she'd ever have with her lover and she cherished every second of it.

A loud crash pulled her back to reality. The fight was lost and she knew she needed to get away. She took one last look at the love of her life before standing up and leaving him there - along with a piece of herself.

"I really miss him...", her voice grew thick and she swallowed to pull herself together. She wasn't the same since that day. She struggled with those memories. In fact, she didn't know which ones were worse - the happy memories from her dream or rather those painful ones. (Y/N) avoided thinking about it too much - she was plagued by guilt ever since she got to live while others had to die, "I had to leave the bodies there... They - the marine I mean - they didn't even bury them properly. They were just all thrown in some kind of unmarked mass grave or something... like... like a bunch of dogs"

Zoro didn't know what to say. The way the girl sat before him, he could tell how painful this all was to her and he felt bad that he was the reason for it. Contrary to popular belief, Zoro wasn't as clueless as most people thought. Most of the time he simply didn't care to pay enough attention but right now he had listened to every single word that left her lips and yet had still no idea what to say. He was truly lost for words.

"I'm... sorry", as soon as Zoro spoke the words he realized how foolish they sounded. Almost as if to apologize for eating the last desert or borrowing something without asking beforehand - not for indirectly being responsible for the death of a loved one. He wanted to tell her that he too knows how it feels to lose someone. That he never meant for that to happen but instead he just remained silent.

She sighed and quickly wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes with the palms of her hands.

"I have no ill will towards you. You only did what you had to do to survive. It's a dog eat dog world out there. I know this as good as you", she sent him a shaky smile, "You didn't kill him. It was his decision to fight. It's just... seeing you here again. Everyday. It brings back memories. I see you and I think of him. I can't help it. I know it's not fair to you but that's the only way I know how to cope at the moment", she shrugged like it wasn't that big of a deal but her inability to hold his gaze for even a second showed how she truly felt.

The morning sun was now fully out and slowly the other Straw Hats started to fill the deck - starting with Sanji, who was usually the first to get up everyday to prepare breakfast for the whole crew. (Y/N) decided to join him like most days. She was awake anyways so preparing breakfast with Sanji became like her little morning ritual. She sent Zoro a small smile before she left him sitting there alone with his thoughts.

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Zoro didn't show up for breakfast that day. (Y/N) was thankful for it. That morning was emotionally draining for her but there was also something else... It was the first time she's ever spoken about what had happened back then and apart from the vulnerability it felt good to properly allow herself to think of her old friends and her former lover again. She did allow herself to mourn them right after it happened but the guilt was overwhelming and most of the time she wished for herself to be dead as well. To combat those feelings she abandoned the memories of her old crew altogether - the hurtful ones as well as the happy ones - until she didn't think about them at all anymore. Of course, she never forgot them. She still had a goal to reach, but she just didn't allow herself to indulge in those memories anymore in fear of the emptiness inside of her returning. Today, was different though. Talking to Zoro about everything, re-living the situation hurt, but now that she was sitting in the dining area sorrounded by her new crew - that familiar hopelessness never came.

"Oi, where's Zoro?", Luffy spoke through a mouth-full of food.

"It was his turn with night watch duty tonight. He's probably catching up on sleep", Dr. Chopper explained. He was right. It wasn't unusual for the night guards to be absent during breakfast in the morning - especially for Zoro, who took any opportunity he could to squeeze in a good nap whenever he got the chance - but Sanji would usually make sure that whoever's turn it was would eat first and then go to bed.

"Fine by me", the captain laughed happily as he grabbed another stack of food from across the table, "that mean I get to eat Zoro's portion then"

(Y/N) silently agreed with the Straw Hat, not minding the swordfighter's absence at all. It was Sanji that wasn't having any of it though.

"Who does he think he is? (Y/N)-san and I spent all this time preparing this food. Cooking, frying, baking... And this stupid marimo doesn't even show up? Doesn't he know wasting food is a cardinal sin in my kitchen?"

"Oi, Sanji calm down. I don't think any food is going to wast", (Y/N) motioned to Luffy, who grabbed yet another set of plates, shoving everything in his mouth at once, "besides, we've all skipped breakfast before..."

Her words had the desired effect and the cook did indeed shut up about Zoro, so that she could finally enjoy the rest of her food in peace without having to worry about the moss head.

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After breakfast (Y/N) decided to spend some time with the others, doing chores, training and generally enjoying the day. The sun was out and Nami decided this was the perfect weather to sunbathe a little. And so (Y/N) found herself along with Nami and Robin, who preffered to read under a parasol, on deck soaking up the sun whilst being served and taken care off by Sanji. (Y/N) could've done without the overbearing cook bringing them iced tea and little snacks every few minutes but Nami insisted that he enjoyed being of service so they should just lean back and enjoy - which she eventually did.

It was only when Zoro did not show up for dinner either that she realized that (Y/N) hadn't seen the swordsman at all that day after their talk in the wee hours of the morning. For a moment she pondered if she should fix him a plate and bring it up to the crows nest, so that he didn't have to go hungry but then quickly decided against it. If he didn't want to see her, she wouldn't want to make him uncomfortable by forcing herself on him. 'He'll surely wander into the kitchen after dinner is finished and fetch himself some leftovers', she thought to herself, 'And tomorrow everything will be back to normal'

But the next morning Zoro still didn't show up for breakfast. Or dinner. Or the breakfast the morning after.

"Hey, Usopp... who's turn was it to keep night watch ?", she furrowed her brows. Did the swordfighter switch with Nami again in exchange for some extra allowance so that he could buy more booze during their next errand run? It was a win-win situation for the both of them. Nami got to have her 'much needed beauty-sleep' whilst Zoro could earn some money on the side. He usually slept during guard duty anyways, relying on his instincts to kick in should something or rather someone try to start shit. She halted for a second, when did she get to know him that well?

"Uh? Franky's I think, why?", the long-nosed sniper answered her but was quickly dimissed by a hand gesture from the black market dealer. This was weird... Was he mad at her now?

Ever since that morning with Zoro, she slept well - great actually. Granted, it was a dreamless sleep but she preferred it like this at that moment in time. When she awoke in the morning, she realized that she had slept in. A little disgruntled about nobody waking her for breakfast she made her way into the dining area.

She didn't expect to find the swordsman sitting there. Their talk was now about a week ago and still he had somehow successfully managed to avoid her at all costs. She didn't see him during mealtime. She didn't see him roaming the ship. He didn't even nap at his usual spots, whenever (Y/N) was nearby. (Y/N) didn't know how to feel about it. There definitely was a feeling in her chest and she definitely knew that it wasn't a good feeling but she couldn't quite tell what it was... Was it guilt? Guilt for dumping all her trauma onto him? Annoyance that it was now him that somehow couldn't stand even being in the same space as her? No... it was something else entirely... Whatever it was, she didn't like it. Talking to him - speaking her feelings - she hadn't felt so at peace in ages and she was thankful for the opportunity and now it felt like she created herself another problem.

When she entered the dining area, several heads turned to her, greeting her, teasing her for sleeping in but (Y/N) only had eyes for a certain mosshead at the very head of the table. Her heart involuntarily skipped a beat. She was glad to see him - a thought for which she would've bitten her own tongue a week ago. Maybe she was simply over-thinking and everything could go back to normal now...

Zoro however had other plans as he slowly lowered the cup he was holding, placing it back on the table, getting up in the process.

"Where do you think you're going?", Sanji started but the pirate hunter didn't even stop walking.

" 'M full", he mumbled as he passed the girl that was still standing in the doorway.

"Zoro... you don't-", she tried to reason with him, still in disbelief about what she was seeing but he didn't acknowledge her.

Luffy was already all over Zoro's leftover whilst Sanji was still raging about there being leftovers at all when (Y/N), who hadn't moved an inch, too shocked by what just had happened, finally spoke up - although more to herself, "I'm not hungry"

With that she turned on her heel leaving the Straw Hats sitting there perplexed about what it was they had just witnessed.

"What was that?", Usopp asked no emotion on his face or in his voice.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say relationship troubles", Nami answered not enjoying the thought of not knowing about what was up with those two. Little did she know that neither (Y/N) nor Zoro had any idea themselves. However from then on, neither of them would show up where they expected the other to be present aswell, which - to be fair - on a ship could be anytime or anywhere, so they mostly stuck to themselves. Zoro in the crowsnest and (Y/N) in the aquarium.

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Yet another fight. Why did these damn Straw Hats always have to get themselves into some kind of trouble? (Y/N) had heard about the G-5 marines before. She heard horror stories about the marines of this branch being insane and needlessly cruel, torturing pirates for fun, killing them without reason but (Y/N) didn't dwell on it. She learned years ago to not fear death anymore but even if she did, there wouldn't be much reason for it. The Straw Hats really were as strong as the people in the bars were telling themselves behind their hands whenever they entered the establishment.

She had never seen anybody fight the way Luffy did, using Haki and his devil fruit power almost effortlessly. If she wasn't so preoccupied with the marines she was fighting off, she'd just stand there and watch her captain fight the vice-admiral that the people called Smoker the White Hunter. Neither of them holding back on their attacks.

But it wasn't only Luffy, who was extremely powerful. She quickly realized that every single one of the crew could hold their own in a fight, making her scramble to prover her worth as well. She'd be damned if someone had to rescue her during their first real brawl.

She had to admit seeing Zoro fight, triggered some uneasy feelings she quickly had to abandon to the back of her mind. He was the only one whom she had seen fight before but last time they unfortunately weren't on the same side. Of course, he greatly improved from back then to now - she was glad she didn't have to stand before him on the battlefield. Fighting almost seemed to be fun to him but not in a way that she had seen with Luffy or even Malik. It wasn't a carefree happiness. She heard people talk about the pirate hunter as if he wasn't fully human - part demon even - but she always dismissed these rumours as drunken tavern talk nothing more, nothing less but now (Y/N) knew what it was they were talking about. If it weren't for the semi-friendly competition between him and Sanji, she'd be more concerned but as the two of them were at each others throat whenever they had a free minute, she figured it was normal.

Zoro must've struck down close to double the amount of marines that the rest of the crew had managed to defeat in the same time when he suddenly stopped, his devilish demenour forgotten. (Y/N) forrowed her brows, trying to understand what was going on over there. Who was that woman facing Zoro and why was he not fighting her? She knew Sanji never kicked a lady but (Y/N) has seen Zoro fight women before. So why was he not moving?

As the two of them were in the middle of what seemed to be a heated discussion in which the female captain tried to attack the green-headed fighter to get him to fight her, (Y/N) noticed that Zoro was so busy deflecting her hits that he didn't even noticed two marines wildly starting an attack from behind.

With a few long strides, (Y/N) stood between the pirate hunter and his attackers, striking them down in the process.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? You should've seen that coming!", she yelled at him already finding herself in the next one on one fight. It was as if the pirate hunter was snapped out of his daze as he quickly made an exit, leaving the marine captain behind.

************************************************************************

"Hey", he walked up to her where she was sitting gazing at the surface of the water. The sun had already started to set and it was a bit chilly outside, so it was only the two of them on deck of the Sunny. (Y/N) couldn't help but to be reminded of the last time the both of them were alone out there, feeling at peace and strangely familiar with the mosshead.

"I saved your ass out there today", she told him, still not taking her eyes off of the water, "who was she? The marine captain with the glasses I mean"

Zoro hesitated for a moment. He didn't like talking about personal stuff. That was nobody's business anyways but she had opened up to him as well. She trusted him with her trauma, so maybe he should do so as well? Before he could make a decision, the dealer interrupted his thoughts.

"You could've easily taken her. I've watched her - she's good... but now that good", she was now looking at him, Zoro couldn't quite read the look on her face, "Listen, you do you but if we really are a crew I need to know that I can trust you..."

The fighter sighed but ultimately decided to tell (Y/N) all about Kuina, their goal and his promise to her. When he finished it was him that couldn't stand to hold her gaze anymore.

"That's very noble of you - holding on to your promise after all those years, I mean", she sent him a soft smile. Zoro noticed that she didn't seem to have any problems finding the right words. She didn't just stutter out an 'I'm sorry' for lack of a better idea.

The mosshead shrugged. Not even know he knew what to say to properly portray why becoming the strongest was so important to him.

"I understand, you know?", she continued, "I have a goal too. It's not as honourable as yours and it's entirely selfish to be honest but it's the reason I've become a black market dealer and just between the both of us? It's also the only reason I joined you guys", she lowered her voice for the last part eventhough she knew nobody could hear them.

Zoro was still hung up on her calling him honourable. That word was the last thing he would've described himself.

"What is your goal?", his voice was deep, no inflections, but he was genuinely interested.

She laughed to herself embarrassed about her ambitions but then decided to keep talking - albeit without looking at him, "I've never talked about this to anybody... When Malik died I swore to myself I'd find his devil fruit. I've been looking for years. Built up an underground trading network, buying and selling all kinds of useless junk so that I always have the funds to pay for should my vendors some day offer me the right one. No luck so far"

Zoro blinked a few times. He remembered Nomi's devil fruit. Whoever ate the fruit gained the ability to plant visions in their enemies heads gaining an advantage in combat situations but...

"Here in the New World many - if not all - people have Haki. You'd have to be very strong to overcome that", he tried to be gentle with his delivery, not wanting to insult her by implying that she'd be too weak to be a devil fruit user. She turned to fully face him now.

"Oh, I know...", she paused for a moment, seemingly searching for the right words, "it's just - I couldn't stand the thought of anybody else having his fruit. Being on the battlefield and having to fight against something that was such a core component of what made him him"

"So you just want to have it?"

She shrugged, "Don't tell Luffy I said that but I always thought a pirate that can't swim is a little foolish anyways. A recipe for disaster really"

For a moment the two just looked at each other but then the girl broke out in a huge grin. He hadn't seen her smile properly ever since she joined the crew. She was friendly to everybody - sans him of course - but she was never really happy. She tried to stop it by biting her lip but that made it only more charming to him.

"You saved me today", he dead-panned, looking down at her not knowing how to show his grattitude as he wasn't used to being saved. It was usually him that did the saving.

"I did"

"Why? I thought my presence brings back bad memories", his voice was low barely but a whisper.

"That doesn't mean I want you to die, you idiot", she sounded almost offended by his suggestion, "You've been avoiding me", she continued, now wanting some answers for herself.

"I didn't want you to be forced to eat at the same table with me. All those things that happened to you..."

She looked at him with a sad expression on her face placing a hand on his forearm. Usually the swordsman would've pulled his arm away but he just let her, "Zoro, I've told you before I don't blame you for what happened"

"Even if that were true, you said seeing me reminded you of what happened. So I stayed away"

She tried to find the right words to express her feelings. On one hand she felt incredibly guilty that he felt he needed to isolate himself from his crew - his nakama - just so that she would feel better and on the other hand she wanted to yell at him that he was being stupid. That he did too much. But there was also another feeling inside (Y/N)'s chest. Was it thankfulness? He had shown her that her feelings and comfort was in this moment more important to him than his own.

Zoro didn't know what to expect now. Did he do too much? Why was he so bad at interpreting people's emotions?? Much to his surprise the girl leapt into his arms, though, hugging him tightly. At first, he was a little overwhelmed but soon hugged her back.

"Thank you, Zoro", she mumbled into his shoulder, where her face was buried.

"I- Don't mention it...", he decided to tighten his grip around her waist a little, "You said- that you didn't want to risk starting to like me-"

He couldn't even finish what he was trying to say as the woman who was comfortably nestled in his arms wiggled and struggled to free herself from his grip. Why did he say that? He scolded himself. Why would he remind her of her resolution to keep her distance. There were a thousand thoughts rushing through his head - which would've been a lot for any person, but was even more especialy for Zoro, who usually didn't think much about things. But maybe that was the problem, he told himself. At least he had a good poker face...

"Zoro, look at me", she put both her hands on either side of his face to make sure he'd actually look at her, "it's a little late for that... I like you already"

"You- you do?", the mosshead couldn't help but to sound surprised.

"Yep", she popped the 'p', Zoro's eye flickered down to her lips for just the fraction of a second. He hoped that she didn't notice but no such luck.

"I think I've liked you since the first time we talked, I just didn't realize it until you started avoiding me", she leaned in closer, sliding her hands from the sides of his face to the back of his neck. He could feel her breath on his lips now as she voice was barely above a whisper, "Can I kiss you?"

He didn't even answer. Instead he leaned down and pressed his lips onto hers and it didn't take long for (Y/N) to return the kiss. It wasn't hungry or passionate. They didn't make out. It was sweet and it was full of emotions.

"So that's what you two have been doing during mealtime, huh?"

The two of them jumped apart as they heard Usopp's voice.

"And here I was starting to think the two of you disliked each other", Nami added.

(Y/N) and Zoro shared a look trying to gauge how the other wanted to handle this.

"If you only knew..."

************************************************************************

Epilogue

It's been a few weeks since Usopp and Nami caught the two of them on deck. They both decided to let them believe whatever they thought they deduced on the spot. (Y/N) was happy either way. Of course, she would never be able to forget what had happened in front of that marine base a few years back - she didn't even want to forget - but she decided it was time for her to move one. She knew Malik would want that for her. And whenever she wandered the deck in the wee hours of the morning now it was not because she was plaqued by the bad memories, but solely because she decided to keep the green-headed swordfighter company and sit by the water and talk, daydream and watch the sea.

[sarahowritesostucky]

📖"Temporary Custody"

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Steve x ofc x Bucky; Steve x Bucky

Word Count: 3658

Tags: Dom/sub, bdsm au, dom Bucky, sub reader, hurt/comfort, enemies to lovers, gay sex'n'stuff, straight sex'n'stuff, Steve being a literal Golden Retriever, mental health issues, dub-con, forced submission, bakery au, m/f/m, gentle domination, total power exchange

Summary: The stigma and shame of being a submissive has kept Mary unfulfilled and in the closet her whole life, until an inciting incident leads to Bucky and Steve taking her in and giving her everything she was always too afraid to ask for.

Trigger warnings: This story contains background themes of eating disordered behavior, body image issues, self-harm, and alcohol abuse.

Wait! I haven't read an earlier chapter of this fic! Story Masterpost

3. Cream filled Sponge Cakes (with chemicals)

Bucky

They plan out what they’re going to do when they get to the hospital on the car ride over.

“I think it’s best if you wait outside at first,” Bucky says, glancing away from the road for a second to try and gauge Steve’s reaction to this. He looks neutral. “Just because she’s already pissed,” he adds. “And it’ll probably be overwhelming having one person telling her they’re taking custody, let alone two.”

“Yeah,” Steve agrees. “That makes sense.”

Bucky holds his hand out over the center console, waiting for Steve to take it. He does, and Bucky grips his hand tight. “I’ll get the initial stuff out of the way. I’m sure there’s gonna be a ton of paperwork.”

“What if she refuses?” Steve worries. “She can, right?”

Bucky sighs. “Yeah. I don’t have any legal hold on her. Yet. I’ll just have to try and talk sense into her, get her to see that we’re better than the alternative.”

Steve gives his hand a squeeze back. “You can do it.”

Bucky sighs. “I hope so. I really do.” Inside though, he’s already not so sure.

They get to the hospital about forty-five minutes after Bucky’d hung up from the phone call with the police officer. He spots a cruiser parked outside when they approach the emergency room, and it rankles his nerves to think of Mary being forcibly shoved into the back seat of said car.

He goes to the check in desk with Steve and asks for Officer Santiago. “I got a call about an involuntary hold. My submissive,” he says. 

The woman at the desk does a double take at that, looking up and down Bucky where he stands like she’s just realized he’s a different species. “Oh,” she says. “You're one of those?” 

Bucky ignores it, but he can sense Steve tensing up by his side, indignant on his behalf. “Yes,” he says. “I am.” He’s not going to waste time getting on his spiel about mental illness and stigmatization. They’ve got bigger problems right now. “I’m going to need her records,” he says, injecting authority into his tone. “And any paperwork for transfer of custody. The cops brought her in. Name’s Mary.” He shoves his hands in his pockets and tries to look self-assured while he waits, because he doesn’t know what he’ll do if the woman demands a last name.

It takes her several minutes to gather everything up for Bucky. She hands it all over to him and says, “That’s the paperwork for custody. The attending physician should be able to provide you with her medical workup.” She points to a set of double doors. “You go down that hallway and to the left. Bed number four.”

Bucky nods and thanks her, then turns to Steve.

“I know,” Steve says, putting on a brave smile. “I’ll wait here.”

“Baby.” Bucky steps close, pulling him into his arms. Steve’s physically just a little bigger than him, and Bucky has always liked the novelty of that. He kisses him gently and then rests their foreheads together for a moment, letting Steve feel their connection. “I love you,” he says quietly. “You’re the best thing I could ever hope for, you know that?”

Steve’s smile is more natural, now. “Yeah I know it.” He gives Bucky another kiss and stands back. “Hey, what about this?” He knocks on Bucky’s shoulder—the metal one. “She know about that?”

Bucky realizes that he’s not wearing his glove, and tries to remember if he’d had it on at the café. He frowns. “Oh well. I don’t think that’s going to be her main focus, not after I explain everything to her.”

“Yeah.” Steve gives him a light push. “I Love you. Now on and get the hard part over with. I’ll be here when you need me.” 

Bucky nods. He knows he will. He goes back to the check in desk, one last question on his mind. “Is there a food court or something around here?”

Mary

Mary’s taken a break from saying pissy things to the cop who’s guarding her. She’s been so angry, she’s felt like her skin’s boiling. But now she’s starting to get tired, too. She hadn’t slept last night, just stayed up and gabbed on the phone to that crisis counselor. 

She grits her teeth as she fumes about that, feeling betrayed all over again. That bitch had called the cops on her!

“You can tell me anything you want to. I’m here to listen, remember?”

Liar!

“I hope you know I don’t have insurance,” Mary snaps at the officer. He’s sitting in a chair in her little curtained off area. He regards her coolly, saying nothing, and she jerks her head to indicate the emergency room. “And I’m not paying a single red cent for any of this.” So far, they’ve taken her blood, her pulse, an EKG, and sent in nurses, a resident, and several shrinks. They’d tried to put an IV in her but she’d ripped it out as soon as nobody was looking. “I’m suing the hospital,” she adds. “And you. I’m suing the whole police department.”

“Okay,” Santiago says, annoyingly calm.

Mary growls, rattling her hand where it’s cuffed to the bed rail. “This is unconstitutional!”

There’s the sound of a throat clearing, and then the curtain to their area is being pulled aside. Mary’s eyes go wide when she sees who it is. “You?!”

Bucky smiles politely at her. “Me.” He steps into the curtained room, a little snack bag in his hand. He holds it up to show her, and she sees the Hostess logo. It’s a bag of little … sponge cake pastries. “Best I could do on such short notice. They’re for you, if you behave,” he says, talking to her like a pet being offered a treat.

Mary wrinkles her nose. “Pass. D’you even know all the chemicals they put in those things?”

Bucky shrugs and turns to offer them to officer Santiago, who more than happily accepts. Mary pouts as she watches him rip open the bag and stuff one in his mouth.

“How are you doing, Mary?”

She turns her attention to Bucky and scowls at the way he uses her name like he knows her. “Awful,” she says. She jerks her head at Santiago. “Officer Dickwad over here won’t let me have my phone.”

“Language,” Santiago says dispassionately, through a mouthful of cake. 

“Shut up and eat your fucking donut, Rent’a’cop.”

Bucky

He puts his foot down once she starts flinging curses and insults at the officer. As a paramedic, Steve is always in and out of emergency rooms, often working in coordination with law enforcement to deal with uncooperative patients. So Bucky knows just how much drama and belligerence these guys have to deal with on the regular. 

“Hey,” he says sternly. “Don’t disrespect him. He’s just doing his job.” He’s not mean about it, but it’s verging on what Steve likes to call his “Dom” voice, and Bucky can see how it affects Mary. She freezes up, all of her focus on him. For a few seconds, she even forgets to be angry. Bucky takes the opportunity to step close to the bed. He eyes where she’s cuffed to the rail. “Mary,” he says gently. “I know you don’t want to be here. I know you’re angry.”

“You’re damn right I am,” she growls. “They just showed up and threw me in a cop car! Didn’t even give me a choice!”

Bucky reaches out and places his hand atop her cuffed wrist. It’s his metal hand. Her eyes widen when she sees it, but she doesn’t pull away. “I know,” Bucky says. “And I’m sorry it happened that way. But do you understand why people were concerned for your safety?”

Her face tenses up as she tries to hold back some emotion (something tells Bucky it isn’t anger, this time). “They called the cops,” she pouts. “They lied to me.”

“They did,” Bucky agrees, wanting to placate her. “But you were hurting yourself, honey. And you were talking about doing worse, weren’t you?”

She can’t meet his eyes, instead staring at where he’s holding her wrist. “I … I talked about a lot of things,” she mumbles. “It was just talk. I don't even remember half of it. I didn’t … I wasn’t really gonna do anything.”

“Can you show me where you hurt yourself?” Bucky asks, careful to keep his voice gentle. “I want to see how bad it is.”

Mary shivers, shaking her head sadly. Her hair is loose and hanging messy around her face, so Bucky reaches up to tuck it behind her ear. He hears her give a quiet, shaky inhale. “Come on now,” he coaxes. “Let me see.”

For a long moment, it seems like she won’t obey, but then her shoulders sink down and she takes a deep breath and lets it out, whispering a tiny little. “... kay,” as her hands creep down to take hold of the tee shirt she’s wearing. It’s extra large, going all the way to her knees, and it’s all she’s wearing. Bucky doesn’t know if the police brought her in that way, or if it’s something the hospital gave her to put on after being examined, but either way, he schools his expression as she edges the tee shirt up her leg, higher and higher, until it becomes apparent that she is wearing underwear, and she’s bared her hip to him.

Cutting, then.

Bucky looks her over, not as upset by the fresh cuts so much as the old ones. They litter the skin of her upper thigh and hip—some so old they’re scars, some still in various stages of healing. Bucky forces himself not to touch, even though his brain is screaming at him to fix fix fix! There’s nothing here that can be fixed easily—certainly not with a bandaid. Bucky takes a moment to calm himself down before he asks, “How long have you been doing this, honey?”

“I don’t want to talk about it,” she whispers. She shoves the tee shirt back down and meets his eyes. “Why are you here?”

Moment of truth, Bucky thinks. “The police called me. They got my number from your phone. They wanted to call your Dom to come get you.”

She frowns, looking confused. “But … you’re not—”

“Officer Santiago,” Bucky says quickly, cutting her off. “Could you give us a moment alone please?”

“Sure.” Santiago gets up and takes his bag of cakes with him. “Just a couple’a minutes,” he warns, then steps outside the curtain and pulls it shut. Bucky can see as his shoes walk away.

“You told them you were my Dom?!” Mary hisses.

Bucky looks at her sternly. “No. They assumed I was. You had me in your phone.”

“I … I did?”

Bucky’s mouth quirks. “Yeah, you did.”

“Well that doesn’t mean anything,” she huffs. “I’m not even submissive.”

“I think you know that’s not true,” Bucky says. He reaches up and gathers her hair back in one fist and pulls—gently, just enough to put the barest of pressure on her scalp—forcing her to raise her chin. She visibly reacts to it, softening into his grip, eyes slipping closed and features going slack. “You like that,” Bucky says, making it a statement rather than a question, because it’s obvious she does.

Her eyes open slowly. “S’nothing. It doesn’t mean anything.”

He releases her hair, cupping the back of her neck instead. He grips her firmly in his hand, and this time she nearly moans, lips parting and the sound coming out before she can fully stifle it. Bucky’s mouth curls and he hums. “And that? Is that ‘nothing’ too?”

“Please.” She’s having a hard time maintaining eye contact, which is typical. There’s a little pinch between her eyebrows that’s so sweet and needy, Bucky wants to kiss it. It makes her look like she might cry, and that thrills him too. “Please,” she whispers. “I just wanna go home.”

“You’re not going home, Honey,” he tells her, keeping the grip on her neck steady and petting at her hair with his other hand. She’s going down a little, likely so easily because of the alcohol in her system, because of how deprived she’s been until now. She whines a little at his words and he shushes her. “They won’t let you. You’re either gonna have to let me take you, or else stay here in the hospital, in the psych ward.”

Mary whimpers. “No.”

“Shhh,” he soothes. “I know. I don’t want that for you either, but you have to make the choice. If you want to leave here, then you have to sign the paperwork that gives me custody of you.” He tilts her chin up. “Look at me now, Honey.” She’s sluggish, so it takes a second, but her eyes come up as she obeys. They’re a little glossy, pupils blown wide, and Bucky gives her neck an encouraging squeeze. “Good girl,” he praises.

She practically melts at hearing that. “Please …” she says again. 

Bucky would bet money that she doesn’t know what she’s asking for. He does, though. He knows down to the marrow of his bones what a ‘please’ like that means. “Don’t worry, Doll. I’ll take care of you. I will.” He bends and pecks a kiss to her forehead, then steps away. She makes a weak noise of protest and he shushes her. 

“I’m just gonna go get officer Santiago back. … And my husband, Steve.”

She blinks at the word ‘husband’. “Steve?” she repeats, shoulders shrinking as she pulls into herself. “But—”

“It’s okay,” Bucky promises. “He’s a very nice man. You’ll like him.”

Mary looks unsure. Bucky’s glad she’s down, otherwise he’s fairly certain she’d be arguing by now, maybe even pitching a fit and cursing. Instead, what comes out of her mouth is a hesitant little, “... He’s like you?” 

“No. No he’s not designated. He’s—”

“Normal.” She says it so sadly, sounds so demoralized. Bucky has to fight the urge to correct her, to give her a speech about how, ‘just because they’re designated, it doesn’t make them abnormal’. He bites his tongue. What’s more important right now is that she’s making progress in accepting the reality that she’s almost certainly submissive.

“Yeah,” he says. “Steve’s not like us. But I wanted him to come in here and meet you. Do you think you can do that for me, Sweetie?” The pet names come naturally, are a part of his dynamic as a Dom, and Bucky can tell that she responds favorably to them. “Hm? Answer me, Mary.”

(And of course, the use of her name gets instant attention and obedience.)

“Okay,” she says. “Yes.”

He smiles and gives her a heartfelt, “Good girl,” wanting to show her that he’s pleased, that she’s doing well. “I’m gonna go get him, okay? I’ll be right back.”

Steve

Steve is equal parts excited and nervous to meet the woman Bucky has found, the woman they’re going to be taking care of. … Maybe more, if things work out. 

He holds Bucky’s hand as he’s led back to where the emergency room beds are. Bucky draws back the curtain and Steve sees the cop sitting there, looking bored, … and her.

“Oh,” he breathes. “Hey.”

She’s pretty—which is saying a lot, because that’s Steve’s first thought, despite the state of her. She’s got goo gobs of dark eye makeup that it looks like she put on once she was already drunk, and by now it’s been smeared to kingdom come by tears and her own hands. Her hair sits messy and unbrushed around her shoulders, and her eyes are glazed and tired from a high that’s probably going to wear off soon and leave her looking even more exhausted than she already does. 

“Hey,” Steve says, eyes flicking up and down her body where she’s sitting on the bed. She’s wearing nothing but a big tee shirt, and Steve allows himself one glance down at her shapely legs, then resolutely keeps his eyes trained upwards. She’s a disheveled mess, but even like that, Steve can see how she drew Bucky’s attention, that day in the café.

“Hi,” Mary says.

Steve smiles hopefully. By his side, Bucky squeezes his hand in encouragement, and offers, “Mary, this is Steve, my husband.”

Steve watches her face, curious to know what she thinks of Bucky being married. He’s expecting displeasure maybe, imagining that a submissive would feel jealous or upset, if their prospective Dom was already attached to someone else.

But she seems to stay calm, sitting there and taking Steve in with slow blinks, even looking a little bit shy herself. “... You’re big,” she eventually says. “I thought you’d be smaller than him.”

Steve grins and he hears Bucky’s scoffed, “Size has nothing to do with our dynamic.”

Steve knows he’s got half an inch on Bucky, more muscle mass too, but he’s never felt bigger than his husband. Bucky’s personality, his dominance, is larger than Steve.

Mary’s still staring at him, a thoughtful little pinch between her eyebrows. Steve waits in expectation of a question, but none comes. “What?” he asks. He pulls up the room’s extra plastic chair and sits close to the bed, offering her his hand. He’s surprised when she takes it. Steve stares thoughtfully at his hand as she drags her fingers over his fingers, his palm, still not saying anything. He looks over at Bucky, concerned. “Did they give her drugs?”

Thankfully, Bucky chuckles and shakes his head. “She’s down,” he explains.

Oh. Okay. That’d explain her calm affect. Steve had come in here halfway expecting a screaming hellcat. He hadn’t expected this. He turns back to Mary, giving her a friendly look. “Did you have questions you wanted to ask me?”

She bites her lip, clearly working something out in her head. “Bucky said you two have a ‘dynamic’.”

“He did.”

“But he said you’re normal.”

Steve’s lips thin once he figures out what she means. “We’re all normal,” he scolds. “But no, I don’t have ‘Dominant or Submissive Personality Disorder’, if that’s what you mean.” He puts sarcastic quotes around words to clearly convey his distaste for the classification. He wants her to know how ridiculous he finds it.

“Babe,” Bucky warns quietly from behind. “We’re not getting political right now, okay? Just focus on her, on what we have to do.”

“Right, sorry.” He knows that Bucky’s right, so he tries again, telling Mary, “I’m ‘normal’, but Bucky and I still have a very intimate relationship together. We’re husbands. So yeah, we’ve developed our own dynamic. When I’m with him I tend to follow his lead, so to speak.” He smiles and shrugs. “It works for us.”

Mary looks like she’s thinking this new information over. There’s a slowness to her, a dreaminess in her expressions and her reactions.Steve figures it’s a combination of her being down, and not being sober. In fact, he can smell the vodka leaking out of her pores. It’s actually pretty horrible. “So does that make sense?” he prods her gently. “Mary?”

“… Yeah, I think so.” She eyes him up and down, looking back and forth between him and Bucky. “What will you do?” she asks Steve. She blushes a little from asking the question, so he deduces that she’s asking what he’ll do with her; what their dynamic together will be, outside of her and Bucky.

“I’ll take care of you,” he says, because that’s all he knows for sure, and he wants her to feel safe. Steve knows that it’s absolutely crucial for this woman to feel safe right now, if they’re going to take her home with them. “Bucky and I both will.” He holds her hand—the one that isn’t cuffed to the bed—enveloping it between his. “It’ll be much better than staying here,” he promises. “You’ll be so safe. And much happier.”

Mary’s body draws in, seems to actually get smaller as she pulls back into herself. “I’m never happy,�� she says mournfully. It hurts Steve’s heart to see it, so he knows it must be killing Bucky, given his overly protective instincts. Steve glances over at him. “Babe?”

Bucky has a clipboard full of papers, which Steve knows must be the custody orders. “Here, Honey,” he tells Mary, handing her the clipboard and the pen. “This is what you have to sign to be able to come home with us.”

It kind of bothers Steve that Bucky doesn’t encourage her to read through the documents more thoroughly, but he doesn’t say anything because he knows they have only the best intentions for her. She’ll be safe with them. He watches as she signs her signature in the places Bucky points out, trying to scan some of the fine print as she goes. Anxiety is written across her face and she starts to bite at the chapped skin on her bottom lip. “But, um … what if I’m not what you think?” she worried, not looking at either of them. 

Bucky pets her hair and reassures her. “You are, sweetheart. Trust me. And we’re gonna take you to a therapist anyway, to get an official diagnosis.”

Normally Steve would be scoffing at the word “diagnosis,” but he’s too busy watching the two of them together. There’s a strange feeling in his gut, at seeing his husband touch Mary like that, at hearing him call her pet names and calmly take control of her. Steve’s never seen Bucky dom another person before, and he … he kind of doesn’t hate it. In fact, it’s actually making him feel all the more attracted to Bucky, and curious about Mary. Like he wants to help, wants to get to know her.

She signs the rest of the documents without making a fuss, so Steve figures he’ll be getting that chance.

Series Masterlist

Masterlist

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[crescynnt]

Some thoughts about The Showdown

People say Dark is stronger than Chosen with his Virabands, but realistically, Dark can't do anything to hurt Chosen. Chosen is immune to his deletion powers (and has a decent resistance to his regular powers), and in the end, Dark was only able to subdue him. He's strong, but not strong enough to kill (not that I believe he wants to... or at least, not yet).

Throughout the Showdown, Dark was seen to be using his virus powers more than his own (once he had his Virabands on). Powers that he knows won't kill Chosen (because I refuse to believe he's stupid enough to think if he tried enough times the deletion will start affecting him). Even once Chosen was subdued, he just sent his Virabots across the internet instead of finishing the job.

(long rant about Dark incoming-- wow I actually remembered to cut my long posts)

I never really believed that Dark wanted to kill Chosen (in the Showdown). The first real hit came from Chosen. Sure, Dark shot off an energy ball first when Chosen stopped him from launching the first Virabot, but it was more of a warning shot than anything. Even when he was scuffling with Chosen over the launcher, his real goal was to launch the Virabot to Alan's PC, not to fight his friend.

When Chosen came back after fighting the Virabot, Dark had just moved houses and was working on his project again. He had his Viraband next to his computer that whole time and never put it on. He never intended to fight with Chosen over this. But when Chosen came in, he just started attacking again without question (Chosen woke up that morning and chose violence lol).

During the first few hits, Dark was really caught off guard. He didn't expect his friend to have such a big reaction. His first few shots were always in retaliation to Chosen's. Every single time he fired a shot was right after Chosen hit him. And after retaliating he usually stops to check on/wait for his friend to make a move.

But when Red accidentally opened the portals to the internet, he finally got his s/it together and started fighting Chosen like he meant it. And the first thing Dark did upon coming out was to subdue Chosen for a couple of moments to check on his work.

And that is when he finally decided to duke it out and knock some sense into his friend.

It's a theory of mine that Dark only got serious when he realized someone was messing with his project. Fighting with Chosen was all well and good, but when he thought Chosen was only a distraction while someone else was sabotaging his project, he flipped out.

That was the moment the true betrayal happened.

But he was still willing to talk to Chosen. He was angry, sure, but when Chosen was caught by his Virabots, he stopped raising his blade at him.

But when Second and his friends came into play, he immediately went offensive again. He may have still wanted to reconcile with Chosen, but Second- a literal stranger who was likely the one to mess with his Virabands- was a different story. And he was a lot more ruthless to them than to Chosen.

Moral of the story? Talk to your friends if you're unhappy about their newest world-domination project lest they end up dead. (lol)

[talesofesther]

tangle me in all your broken pieces (and watch me stay) | ch 1

Loki x Reader

Summary: An Asgardian god has just threatened your planet and you were called in to provide a little help. What you didn't expect was to develop a strange soft spot for said god, who hid more pain behind his cold facade than you thought possible.

A/N: Yes, this is chapter one. Yes, there are going to be more chapters. But one important thing to keep in mind with this particular series, is that the updates will not have a fixed schedule. This is a story I will update whenever I have time to write in between my other projects. Anyhow, I do hope you enjoy this random idea I had. <3

Word count: 4,2k

Masterlist

Fury came looking for you as a fail-safe. That was the simple way of putting it.

One of S.H.I.E.L.D's facilities had recently been attacked by someone who came from outside of your world; he'd taken what Fury called the Tesseract, twisted the minds of Agent Barton and Doctor Selvig, and worst of all, threatened to take over Earth. So when Fury came knocking on your door, on a rainy Saturday, you didn't have many options other than agreeing.

Rain pattered on the windows of your small apartment, the weather was rather cold today. You picked up two mugs from the cabinet, placed a bag of tea on each, and added hot water.

"I need you with me," Fury told you, taking the mug you handed to him.

You sighed, taking a seat on the armchair of your living room, "you're putting together a group of heroes. I'm not a fighter, uncle Fury, you know that."

"And I'm not asking you to be," he shook his head softly, leaning forward to place his mug on the coffee table after he took a sip, "if anything, I'll make sure to keep you away from any fights." He looked at you for a beat, and then; "but Loki has messed with the mind of one of my best agents, I cannot take that risk again, and you're the only one who can make sure it doesn't happen. Or fix it, if it does."

With that, you couldn't argue.

Your powers were something you had never asked for, never wanted, they simply happened. Your fourteen-year-old self woke up one day being able to pry into people's minds at will. You could feel their feelings if you wanted to, search recent memories if you focused long enough, and occasionally, do or fix much heavier damage. The full extent of what you could do was still somewhat of a mystery, now and then you caught yourself doing or feeling something new; just like that day when a stray cat had scared the shit out of you and you ended up exploding the can of soda on your hand.

After that incident a couple of years back, you had agreed to let S.H.I.E.L.D. study you just long enough to find out you had something along the lines of psychokinetic and telepathic abilities. Fury then had also told you that your big heart had given you empathic abilities as well; it was intended as a lighthearted joke, but you weren't so sure it was a joke anymore.

Because right now, you could feel hints of Fury's desperation just by looking at him. You nodded, "Yeah, alright. Give me a few minutes to pack."

─── ·❆· ───

S.H.I.E.L.D's Helicarrier was impressive, to say the least. It was an enormous aircraft that could literally disappear in a matter of seconds. Your nerves were still high even though you'd been aboard for a few days.

The main control room was the heart of the hive, so to speak. The place where most agents walked back and forth between the rows of computers, all overlooking the massive glass windows at the front of the aircraft. You stood just behind Fury's main control panels, leaning back on the big glass table. "Will Tony be coming too?" Your eyes roamed over the hustle and bustle of agents around you.

"He will," Fury didn't take his eyes off of the screens as he spoke, "was supposed to arrive with agent Romanoff, but we all know he likes his entrances."

A fond chuckle escaped you. Tony was a friend, you'd met him a few times because of Fury, he'd been a great help in figuring out your… condition, and you kept close contact with him ever since.

Out of the big windows in front of you, you watched as the ocean slowly drifted from view the higher you went into the sky. You could feel the familiar tingle in your stomach as you gained altitude fast. Maria Hill approached Fury not long after, informing him you were high enough to disappear, and so you did.

The sound of footsteps caught your attention and you turned around to see Natasha, Steve, and Doctor Banner walking in. A small frown appeared on your features when Steve handed ten dollars to Fury, but you didn't comment on it.

"Doctor Banner," Fury walked up and extended his hand for Bruce to shake, "thank you for coming."

The scientist looked around with the eyes of someone who hadn't known real peace in a while. You could feel a heavy wave of apprehension and uncertainty coming from him. "Thanks for asking nicely," he answered.

As they spoke, you walked over to Natasha, a small smile coming to your lips, "hey Nat."

Her green eyes lit up as soon as they caught sight of you, she was already opening her arms to pull you into a hug. "Hey, how have you been?"

You hugged her back just as tight, swinging gently from one side to the other. "Alright, you?"

"Well enough," she pulled away with a smirk already on her features and bumped your shoulder with her fist. "It's nice to have you around for a change, even if it's because the world is at risk."

You raised your hands in a half-hearted gesture of surrender while biting back a chuckle, "Point taken, I promise to visit more."

Fury called for your name and you turned to him, "I don't think you've been properly introduced to Doctor Banner." He gestured to his side and you reached out to shake Bruce's hand with a polite smile. "Banner, this is my niece."

Still holding onto your hand, he raised his eyebrows in a mix of excitement and surprise. "The telepath?" He looked from you to Fury.

You pursed your lips, suddenly feeling a little self-conscious. "That's me." You wondered if the people here saw you as one of the heroes too, which of course, you were not.

"I've read your file, the range of your abilities is remarkable."

Fury placed a hand on your shoulder to catch your attention. "Why don't you show Doctor Banner the lab he'll be working on? You can entertain his curiosity then."

"Of course," you buried your hands in your pockets as you tilted your head towards the door, "follow me, Doc."

The laboratory was like a playground for scientists. Filled with all the kinds of machines and computers one could hope for, surrounded by bright white walls and even brighter artificial lights that made your eyes hurt.

As the night stretched on you ended up hanging back with Bruce in his lab. His interest in your abilities didn't die down, but you found that speaking with him about it turned out to be quite easy. He was very smart, there was no doubt about that, having extensive knowledge in areas you didn't even know existed. But he was also kind.

It didn't take long for Fury to come to inform you that they had gotten a hit on Loki's location, Germany. You shared a look with Bruce then, knowing that all there was to do now, was wait.

─── ·❆· ───

"So you can just tell what everyone is feeling all the time, and manipulate those very feelings if you want?" Bruce leaned back on one of the workstations, a look of pure bewilderment in his eyes.

You chuckled, pushing yourself up and sitting on top of one of the desks. "Well, kind of. I can feel emotions if I want to, yes. Memories even, if I can focus on the person long enough. But the manipulating part is trickier," you tried to explain to the best of your abilities, fumbling with the sleeves of your black cardigan. "I can't… take away people's emotions, feelings, but I can ease them. Dull anger, or sadness, for example. But Fury believes that if there's something else intruding on someone's mind, I'd be able to counter it. That's why I'm here."

"That's fascinating," Bruce scratched his chin in thought, "it's almost like a mix of telepathy and empathy."

You hummed, "That's been my experience, yeah."

"What about the…" Bruce gestured around, and somehow you knew exactly what he was talking about.

A smirk came to your lips. You lifted your hand, and tiny white sparks danced between your fingertips, they were barely there, looking almost like a trick of the light. Suddenly the glasses that had been resting on top of Bruce's head flew to your grasp.

A genuine laugh escaped him while he muttered; "remarkable". You couldn't help but join him as you handed him back his glasses. It felt… nice, to have someone genuinely, innocently appreciating what you could do.

Suddenly, the sight of several guards walking past the laboratory's windows caught both of your attention. In the middle of them walked a man with slick black hair, wearing some sort of armor in black, green, and golden, and a devilish smirk on his lips as he looked at you.

Your gaze locked with his for a mere second, and a gasp fell past your lips as you took half a step back. Your heart was in your throat, because even through the glass windows, you could feel an immense pain squeezing your chest and suffocating your lungs. There was raw anger there too, desperation, loss. But the pain overpowered them all. And they came from him. Loki.

You gulped, forcing your gaze away so you had a chance to breathe. "They caught him," you mumbled, still feeling lightheaded from the punch he'd just dealt to your soul.

"Yeah, they did." Bruce's voice sounded far away still.

─── ·❆· ───

Loki wasn't the only new arrival, his brother Thor was also here.

You decided to hang back while everyone discussed how to proceed, leaning against the wall of the main control room as they sat around the glass table. From the camera images displayed on the screens, you could see Loki speaking with Fury, from inside the glass cage that wasn't quite built for him; he spoke with a tone of superiority that sounded like a defense.

Thor explained something about Loki having an alien army he would bring to Earth, and that he was trying to build another portal with the help of Doctor Selvig. You heard bits and pieces, after all, you weren't here to strategize attacks. Instead, your mind drifted to what you'd felt when you briefly locked gazes with Loki. His mind seemed… messy; as if he wasn't quite the only one there.

"I don't think we should be focusing on Loki." You heard Banner say. "That guy's brain is a bag full of cats. You could smell crazy on him."

"Have care how you speak." Thor spoke up, "Loki is beyond reason, but he is of Asgard. And he is my brother."

"You mean he's never been like this before?" You finally spoke up, pushing yourself away from the wall and taking a few steps towards Thor. Your voice drew the eyes of everyone in the room for an instant. "That he's not himself?"

"Yes, Loki has always been one for mischief but never like this. My brother is not evil." The god explained.

"He killed eighty people in two days," Natasha added, raising an eyebrow at Thor.

"He's… adopted."

"I think you might be right, about him being beyond reason," you walked up to stay beside Thor, "when they brought him in I could briefly connect with his mind and… I don't know, it wasn't right."

"You mean to say he's been enchanted?" Thor looked down at you, sparks of hope dancing around him.

You could feel everyone's unwavering gaze on you as well. Your eyebrows scrunched in thought and you fumbled with your sleeves to ease the nervousness. "Kind of, yes. I felt as if he wasn't the only one in his own mind, there was something else there, twisting his thoughts and drive." You glanced up at Thor and then at your teammates around the table, "I may be able to fix it."

A rather loud call of your name captured your attention then. You turned around to see Tony Stark walking in, along with Phil Coulson.

"You always did have a heart of gold, picking up strays and insisting on fixing broken things," the billionaire said with a smile, walking up to you in that smug way only he could pull off, as he already opened his arms.

You mimicked his smile, naturally falling into his hug.

"How have you been, kid?" Tony asked while rubbing your back. He pulled away and kept a hand on your shoulder.

"Pretty good, considering an Asgardian god decided to invade my planet." You smirked back at him, stuffing your hands in your pockets.

"And now you're playing the I can fix him card, is that what I'm gathering here?" Tony pointed a finger at you, comically narrowing his eyes.

You sighed, averting his gaze, "I'm serious, Tony. If there's something invading his mind, don't you think I'd be able to counter it? That's- that's the whole reason why I'm even here."

"I think," Tony began, "you'd be able to do that, and much more. If you actually trained your abilities like I suggested-"

A groan escaped you.

"But you haven't done that, so it's a shot in the dark." He shrugged.

"If there is a chance to help my brother, I would take it," Thor spoke up, looking around to gauge everyone's reactions.

"And what if there isn't?" Steve asked, gesturing with his hands, "You said it yourself, you can't be sure. Is this a risk we're willing to take?"

"We won't be taking risks," you were quick to reassure him, taking a step forward so you were able to lean your hands on the glass table. "All I want is a chance to speak with him, nothing more for now."

"Absolutely not." Fury walked in, his steps large and meaningful as he walked up to stand before you. "You are not getting anywhere near that lunatic."

"I can accompany her to assure her safety," Thor offered.

"Thank you, Thor, but I need to go alone." You said, then turned to look up at Fury. "You called me here to help. Let me help."

Fury tilted his head, an annoyed frown coming to his lips. You knew you'd won.

"He's in pain. So much that I could feel it through the glass windows of the lab, uncle. He's not alone in his own mind. I just wanna talk to him." You pleaded. Why you suddenly cared so much about the very person who was threatening your home, you didn't know. Maybe you did have a heart that was too big for your own good.

Fury stole a single glance towards Stark, and after the latter nodded, he turned back to you. "Five minutes," he leaned just a tad closer, looking you straight in the eyes, "nothing more."

─── ·❆· ───

You closed your eyes, took in a deep breath, held it in your lungs, and then exhaled. You stared at the door that led to Loki's cell, giving yourself yet another pep talk. And then you pushed it open.

The round, glass cage was somewhat intimidating to look at. Built to contain and to kill, if needed. The artificial lights inside were bright, a contrast to the metal walls of the outside. There was a single bench in the back of the cage, but other than that, it was bare.

Loki had his back turned to you as he paced from one side to the other, hands clasped behind his back, as if waiting for something. His black and green attire stood out under the blinding lights.

Your steps were slow and quiet, you couldn't deny the racing of your heart, punching against your ribs in fear and anticipation—yet you kept an emotionless facade.

You could tell the exact moment that Loki felt your presence. He stopped pacing, waiting for a beat until, ever so slowly, he turned around to face you. His eyes were ice cold, a pale blue that made you shiver; his smirk was nothing short of devilish, worthy of a person who knew held all the cards in his hands. Loki looked at you up and down, and took a few steps forward so he stood right against the glass, as close as he could be to you. His gaze never once wavered.

"And who would you be?"

Silent. You kept silent for several moments. The nails you previously had piercing the skin of your palm in nervousness loosened their grip, a soft breath went past your lips, and your shoulders relaxed.

No, there was no reason for you to be afraid of him. Well, that would be an understatement. After all, you could easily sense the raw power and magic flowing through his veins. But that didn't instill fear in you, and neither did his empty threats. Because right now, as you finally looked him straight in the eyes, you easily slipped into his mind, his subconscious, his memories, and feelings.

More than anything, he was hurt; had been bleeding for long. But you were glad to confirm your suspicions, he was not alone in his mind; there was a plague in him, twisting and piercing into old wounds, worsening what was already there; it drove his anger and instilled fear and desperation in him for what would happen if he failed.

Looking into his eyes, you didn't feel fear. You felt sympathy.

At last, when Loki had started to look at you with a deep frown, you told him your name.

"Agent Barton hasn't told me about you." Loki's eyes roamed your features, undoubtedly determining if you were harmless or not.

"I'm afraid we aren't that close," you told him simply, keeping your voice gentle.

A low chuckle escaped Loki's lips then, "Did you come here simply by imprudent curiosity then?" He raised his chin higher. "Have you any idea who stands before you?"

You pursed your lips and took a step closer to him. His words sounded a little muffled to your ears as you struggled to focus. There was a faint burning sensation behind your eyes, a pressure in your head that spread to your entire body until it reached your fingertips. It was both familiar and unfamiliar. You'd never used your powers to this extent.

Loki had a strong mind, there was no doubt about that. Yet briefly, you could catch glimpses, a blurred array of memories even Loki tried to push away. You watched his fall from Asgard. His descent to what he thought, hoped would be the end. Until he was found. And then there were screams of pain and cries for help that nobody answered until he was forced to give up. Nothing was clear, everything twisted and scrambled, but enough to snatch your breath away and hold your heart in a vice grip.

He felt it, you know he did. The gentle whispers of you in his mind. You could tell the exact moment. All emotion and color drained from Loki's face, he took several steps back and away from you. For the first time, he wore an expression other than smug and confident. His bright eyes were wide and glimmering under the artificial lights, lips hovering open and quivering. It was a blink, a fraction of a second and then he was back in control.

"How dare you?!" He all but growled, fists closed tightly on either side of his body as erratic breaths went past his lips and nostrils. "Who do you think you are to try and pry into my mind?"

You felt as if there were cotton balls in your throat as you gulped, your vision went a little blurry. You shouldn't be feeling this way for someone who had literally threatened your home, but all you could hear right now was that same voice of his, begging for mercy.

Without a physical connection, Loki was able to keep you out of his mind pretty easily.

You sighed heavily, closing your eyes for a beat to recompose. You looked up at him then, unable to help the softness of your features. "What happened to you?"

Loki hesitated, even though he tried to hide it. He blinked, stumbling over his words; "I think you should be more worried about what I will do to you and everyone you've ever loved, you insolent, pathetic mortal."

His threats were emptier than you thought they would be. He felt exposed and was desperately trying to defend himself.

You shifted your gaze to the cameras around the room, biting into your cheek while you considered just how stupid and reckless it was what you were about to do. With your mind, you turned the lock on the door you'd just come from. In one swift stride forward, you were able to flatten your palm against the glass walls that held Loki; and with just a bit of struggle, you had him pushed and pinned against the bench on the far side of the cage.

"What do you think you're doing?" Loki snapped, he fought against the invisible force holding him, trying to get up and lift his hands, but to no avail. "Release me this instant."

"Sorry," you walked backward, keeping your eyes on him until you reached the control panel and pushed the button that opened the glass cage, "can't do that."

"If you think for one minute that your sorry excuse of magic can hold me down-"

"I know I can't." You told him as you carefully walked inside with him. He was strong, much stronger than you, and sooner or later he'd overpower you. "Not for long at least." You stood in front of him, looking down at his enraged form sitting down on the bench. "But maybe just long enough."

Right now, as Loki looked up at you with nothing but anger in his cold eyes, his lips in a thin line, and his eyebrows pulled together; you could say you felt a little scared.

Slowly, you raised both hands. Your fingers shook as you halted your movements just short of touching him. "I promise I just want to help you," you told him quietly, your eyes never leaving his.

"I will make you regret ever walking into this room," Loki spoke through gritted teeth, the muscles on his neck straining as he tried to break free.

"Maybe," you breathed, struggling to keep him in place, before unceremoniously cupping both his cheeks with your hands.

Loki opened his lips to, most likely, throw another insult at you, yet his words died in his mouth.

With your skin touching his, your soul entangling with his, you were finally able to enter his mind freely. You closed your eyes and made quick work of dissipating the plague infesting his brain, severing the connection he had with the creature that had tortured him, and freeing his subconscious from its influence and enchantment. It was harder than you wished and easier than you expected, pulling at the strings of your heart while you worked your power through him, but it was done. Loki's body was still healing from what they'd done to him, and now his mind would follow.

You also couldn't hold yourself back from dulling his pain and anger while you were at it. Trying to offer just a bit of peace to his troubled soul.

You opened your eyes again with a heavy gasp escaping your lips. Your lungs lacked air and you could taste copper on your lips. Blinking several times, you took a single glimpse at your faded reflection on the glass walls and noticed that a steady line of blood was trickling down your nose. You'd nearly gone past your limits.

With your hands still holding onto Loki, you risked a look down at him.

It was like a wave washing to shore, soft and calm after a heavy storm. His eyes slowly faded from a pale blue to a gentle green, glistening under the light, pupils blown wide as he kept his gaze fixed on you. A soft breath went past his lips and his eyebrows softened, it was as if for a brief moment he forgot where he was, and simply basked in the absolute relief of having his mind finally free. He stood bare before you.

A single tear trickled down his cheek and landed on your thumb. You brushed it away tenderly, and you thought he almost leaned into your touch. He blinked lazily then, and you saw his walls gradually coming back up.

You felt lightheaded, and with Loki coming back to himself, you took it as your cue to leave him.

Stumbling on your feet, you made your way out. You pushed the button and closed the glass door again.

Loki hadn't moved, even though you were not holding him in place anymore. He stayed seated, knuckles white as he gripped the edge of the bench and kept his gaze ahead, unfocused.

Once again, you touched the glass wall with your fingertips. It was indeed pathetic, that you felt a surge of protectiveness, of worry even, for the god who had threatened your planet.

"For what it's worth," you began quietly.

Loki's eyes drifted up to your face. His expression unreadable.

"I'm sorry for what you've been through." With that, you gave him a tight-lipped smile, and left.

⋆* ☾ ⋆*･ﾟ:⋆*･ﾟ

Read ch 2 here

Thank you for reading this little story. Feedback and reblogs are literally what keeps me motivated to continue posting here, so I’d appreciate it if you could take some time to reblog and comment. <3

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[hey-august]

If you are still doing the prompts, reader saying prompt nr 2 to Buggy because we already saw him crawl in the show and yanno. Yannnoooo…..

(Also I know using chop chop powers in this specific way may not be everyone’s piece of cake but if the idea of him and reader in a consensual scene with him only having parts of his arms and legs instead of all of his limbs to move over to reader also does anything for you…. WELL. I mean WELLLLLL)

Gif from monikanarnia

WELLLLLLLL, ANON 🤭 This got WAY out of hand. Not very smutty, it's more about the vibes here.

Prompt: “Crawl to me.” Warnings: NSFW, MDNI, buggy x GN!reader, buggy discovers he might have a humiliation kink 🤡 Word count: ~1.3k

That drunk moron. It’s infuriating, honestly. There are parts everywhere, like the aftermath of a dog who got too ferocious with a stuffed toy. In this case, it was a pirate who got too deep into a bottle of rum. You woke up to a solo hand resting on Buggy’s side of the bed. Hoping that the rest of his body was on the floor or at least safely nearby, you got up and promptly tripped over a forearm. Just a forearm. And that was the sign - Buggy literally lost control of himself.

The rest of your morning was spent on a fucked up treasure hunt. Flesh and body parts strewn across the ship, meekly waiting for someone to find them. A few choice parts you opted to leave where they were, because fuck him. Buggy’s torso, found in a hallway and all in one chunk, was too heavy for you to carry. His head was in the kitchen and pissed you off with the peaceful sleepy expression it had. His feet were waiting outside a bathroom and they could stay there for all you cared. You also left behind the hand still clutching an empty rum bottle. Everything else you found either on your own or in a pile that the crew put together. You toted the pieces back to the bedroom to keep safe. Safe.

You just finished locking up the last dresser drawer with a satisfying ‘click’ when shouting signaled the captain’s arrival. His voice oscillated between shrill and hoarse, a symptom of a likely hangover. As Buggy got closer, you could pull out pieces of what he was griping about. In between usual orders for the crew were demands and queries about where he was and wasn’t. You knew they would point him in your direction, so you leaned against the dresser and waited.

The hand you left on the bed perked up at the sound of knocking. It zoomed over and opened the door to rejoin it’s owner. In toddled Buggy. You thought that you’d feel better after seeing him, but the unreadable expression on his face ticked you off. It’s like he couldn’t decide if he was happy to see you or annoyed about the absence of his body. The thin tight lipped smile held under his smeared face paint flickered into a frown more than once as you stared at each other.

After a moment, you crossed your arms tauntingly. Buggy shuffled into the room further and flicked his hand to close the door. He wasn’t graceful.

“Really? You left me like this?” Buggy’s question finally pulled forward the smirk you tried to tamper down.

You pointedly looked at him up and down (not that there was much to look at right now) before answering. “What’s wrong?” 

“What the FUCK am I supposed to do without arms or legs?” Buggy shouted as he wiggled the hands attached to his shoulders and stamped the feet his torso sat on.

“Hm, that sounds like a you problem. I was just cleaning up the mess you left,” you said coldly. 

“Babe, the mess is ME. Of course it’s a me problem, it’s my body,” he sneered. “Give it back, I know you have me locked up like some fucking hostage.”

“Like your audiences?”

This wasn’t working. Buggy needed to try something different. Honey, instead of vinegar. All he wanted was to reassemble so he could fall apart in bed. He was exhausted and it’s hard to sleep when parts of himself are just out of reach. It’s like voices in his head that he can’t turn off. You were mad, obviously. And what should a good partner do when someone’s mad? Listen. Lucky for him, he still had ears.

“Sweetie, sweets, dearest,” the performer cooed with an apologetic smile as wiggled forwards a few inches. “You’re upset with me, I get. What can I do to make it up to you?”

You allowed yourself time to roll through your thoughts. There was a lot you could ask for - gold, treasures, a date, fancy food, new clothes. One idea called out to you, a wicked little sound that stuck in your head like sludge.

“Crawl.” The air in the room stilled. The atmosphere shifted, pressing down on you both. The weight pulled Buggy’s smile down into a disgusted scowl.

“Say again?”

“I want you to crawl to me. Then you can have your things back.” You said the request as if it was the simplest thing to do. As if he had enough body parts to crawl with.

“C’mon, baby, I’m not gonna-”

“Then you’re not gonna get shit. Crawl, Captain.” 

The sharp tone in your demand stirred something deep inside Buggy. A depraved perversion that had been waiting for a moment to shine woke up ready to play. His cheeks flushed as the pounding in his chest shifted from hot anger to burning desire under your unrelenting stare. With a click of his tongue, the pirate stared at the ground and wondered how to start.

You watched as Buggy lowered himself horizontally to the ground through a controlled topple, stopping short of smashing his nose on the wooden floor. Fingertips and tiptoes held him aloft - just barely. Strands of hair that escaped his bandana dusted the wood floor as he hovered, steadying himself before making another move. Craning his neck, ocean eyes sought yours to ask if this was enough. An emotionless stare said it wasn’t. Keep going.

A dramatic sigh wafted across the floor as Buggy began inching his way towards you, moving at a pace that his stiff hands and feet set. It was slow progress and you followed every bit of it. There were a few moments you thought he’d give up. Moments where he’d pause to give his aching fingers a rest. Stopping to look and see how far away you were, both physically and emotionally. If it wasn’t for the embarrassed erection throbbing underneath him, Buggy probably would have tried harder to talk his way out of this.

He felt ashamed, embarrassed, and so fucking turned on - which only added to the humiliation. Part of him wanted you to say he had done enough and could stop. But a hornier voice told Buggy to keep going, to see what would happen. Finally, he was close enough. He had huffed and panted his way across the room, fingertips and cock throbbing through most of the awkward journey.

You looked down at the small man at your feet, waiting for him to make the next move. After a brief respite, Buggy rightened his body, relying on his Devil Fruit ability to make up for the lack of limbs. Once vertical, Buggy turned his face towards yours. You would have thought the hot red blush was the result of physical exertion after a night of drinking, if it wasn’t for the blown out pupils and the way he licked his lips.

“Are you turned on? Did that fucking turn you on?” you asked in disbelief. His narrowing eyes the only answer he’d give.

“C-can I have my body back?” A slight quiver slipped out with the request.

With rolling eyes, you released the pirate’s body parts from their wood prisons. Buggy quickly reassembled himself with a flurry of movement. His eyes met yours for a brief moment before darting away in shame. The knot in his stomach tightened, pulling his cock in an aggressive twitch.

“You still mad at me?” Buggy mumbled. You didn’t miss the uplift intonation hidden under the question.

“Why? Do you want me to tell you how to make it up to me?”

Buggy’s eyes widened at the prospect and the blush on his face spread to his ears. The answer tasted uncomfortable. A little bitter, but he liked it. Still, he was reluctant to admit to this craving.

Reading into his hesitation, you grabbed Buggy’s chin and pulled his face to meet yours. “Tell me, Buggy.”

You broke through the weak barrier he pretended to hide behind. Buggy’s hands wrapped around your forearm, wanting to stay in this position. To keep this dynamic. His face softened and he nodded vigorously against your hold.

(prompt list)

[barcaluvv]

Lamine yamal x reader You and Yamal, the bond of friendship, which no one could ever separate, whether together or not at all, but as they say, a man can only kill his happiness because of feelings, but this time they both separated their wires that held many years of friendship.

One night, everything snapped and huge feelings came out of you both.

You were talking, you were sitting on the very bench, talking about irrelevant things, because you were both thinking the same thing, and if only you knew that, everything would be different. Yamal was teasing you with the book he was holding tight in his slender arms,grabbing your pens away as you were just out of class, second shift, laughing loudly and not caring about what others thought but yet not a single soul was seen. You felt like the while city was sleeping, as your paths will slowly diverge any moment from now. When you calmed down a bit Lamine said something condescending, his voice shaking not from cold but from fear "Can I tell you something?but dont be mad okay?" He was admiring your hair slowly but precisely fluttering in the wind, he looked at every line that your smile leaves, all that persuaded him to say what he was going to say now. "Listen y/n" he grabbed you by your palms, creasing your hair, tucking every strain of hair behind your ear, slowly and softly. He clings to you, his voice barely above a whisper "I feel so guilty sometimes... like I'm such a burden on you. I want to be perfect for you." he sniffles, looking down at the leaves falling from the branch.

"What are you trying to say?" U get worried. Tears form in his eyes as he continues "I'm scared too, ... scared of losing you. You mean everything to me." he takes a deep breath, trying to calm himself "I just want to make you proud and happy, but i cant continue like this, i wake up everyday thinking about how my emotions tremble against your will, not being enough to express them to you, i love you y/n, u have every right to be mad at me and leave, and end our conversation forever but you cant run from the feeling of guilt" he sobs uncontrollably, burying his face in the cold current wind, that was trying to remove a tear from his cheeks ... I need you so much. he clings to you tightly, his entire body shaking from the intensity of his emotions "I don't want to lose you."

"Now maybe i did threw 7 years of friendship away in 5 minutes of speech but, ive waited for these few minutes my entire life now I'd have to break our contact." Said lamine with tear drops falling off his eyes, down to his sweatshirt. This all happened too fast, you're literally out of words but this sentence felt powerful. "Maybe we are soulmates after all".

Lamine wipes off his tears, trying to act tough not understanding your words. "What? What do you mean?".

Lamine, u lean closer feeling his heartbeat acrobat as u get to him.

"The truth is, ive been meaning to tell you that too, but also many thing more such as that my family is moving back to Portugal, this is my last goodbye my love". He sits in shock, feeling his empty-handed heart break in pieces, watching it flow like ashes.

He stands up, kisses your forehead soflty, not leaving any hope after it.

He pulls you tightly,holding you for seconds, treating them like years not wasting any of them, atleast that's not wasted besides the love potential we had.

He pulls away, giving you a bracelet, which says "Why not this universe"

that was written on the black buttons, like he was prepared for this. "Let this be a remember, it might be temporary but my love for you wasn't." He starts walking away, the streets carried him off, and poof suddenly our love too. Two months later, you found out he burned himself down. You were devastated, it took you so many months to put yourself together after this. 6 months passed, you heard a loud knocking on your door, it's better if you didn't open them, just like that I found out that the police was holding a paper, that was apparently held by Yamal when he died. The letter said "when you quietly told me that I won't be able to do without you. X your Lamine." That was supposed to be shifted the same night to Portugal. With a bracelet next to it.

[sorcerous-caress]

Aglaya and Artemy are so smitten with each other oh my god. A doomed romance neither of them expected to blossom amidst the war and plague.

How she desperately tried to protect Artemy at each corner and turn, only wanted the best for him and put in so much effort to understand the kin in such a short notice despite her busy schedule and death knocking on her door.

HE DOESN'T EVEN HESITATE BEFORE CALLING HER HIS WIFE WHEN THE LITERAL ARMY CORNERS THEM. Fleeing together and choosing their own path! Choosing their love over the town and all the people in it! In Artemy's view, that might as well have been their wedding vows.

She's such a powerful woman who instils fear into everyone she crosses. The infamous inquisitor who broke the mind of everyone she has called into questioning so far, who had the Bachelor thinking that she'll order his execution. Who had the kains shaking in terror, crumbling down the three old powerhouses of the town in a couple of days.

Mansplain Girlboss x Himbo Malewife fr fr

I always felt like their relationship progressed a little too fast in P2, but when I played P1 I completely understood why. it's expanded upon so much more and you get to see exactly how they slowly fall in love, how much their trust in each other multiples by the day.

How everyone around them can see it clearly.

MY WIFE <3333 M Y WIFE I AM IN HEAVEN.

There are just so many golden lines between these two. There are so many adorable moments of them being silly and weird, and so so in love like:

Aglaya makes her interest in Artemy as a person very clear. She recites us peotry upon first meeting him, saying he will learn the meaning in the future.

Yet she compares his mind to that of a poet later on.

Saying how much she respects him, how she incoperates a steppe term into a beautiful flirtatious line when she thinks it's time to say goodbye. When she thinks we won't return her feelings.

And yet despite her feelings burning with the intensity of a thousand suns, she never allows it to mix with her job, even telling him not to get roped into politics because he's on the path of priesthood while she acknowledges the manipulators she works for.

All to protect him, to protect you.

She is very sweet and thoughtful, calculated yet sincere in her feelings for Artemy. She never once acts like how others claim she would. She never walks anyone else's path of expectations.

All of her infatuation stems from the fact that Artemy answered her lifelong question so simply. Because he loved this town he grew up in and wanted to protect it.

Because he proved that having free-will makes very little difference in the grand nothingness of the universe. Even if other people interpret his actions or use it to benefit their schemes, Artemy will walk a path of his own making and follow his own heart to know what's right or wrong.

He showed her that she has always been free, not the puppet she thought she was. That constantly trying to spite greater forces isn't a way to live your life. Rather, actually living that life how you want is true freedom.

That finding your own happiness and looking out for the people you love is the best revenge you could deliver.

Even if everyone was a puppet and their entire reality has been nothing but a game, even then it wouldn't make a single difference to Artemy.

Because his love was real, his feelings were real enough. Puppet or not, he loved his father. He loves this town, which nursed him young. And he will deliver that love back when it's in need, when the kids he swore to protect are in danger.

And yet, I have a theory. I think it's the player she is in love with, too, rather than just Artemy.

It's because technically, only the player has free will. Only the player gets to escape the narrative.

Only the player is the full fledged human being that she fell in love with.

But I might be wrong, I need to play the Bachelor's route to confirm this, I've only done the Haruspex in P1 and P2 so far.

So far she is indifferent towards him, at least in Artemy's route, she views the Bachelor as a useful tool, a means to an end. Maybe it changes in his route and she falls for the player again? or maybe it's exclusive to Artemy because while she likes the player, she still loves Artemy himself on his own, even without the free will.

Or maybe you need a combination of both to results in Aglaya taking notice of you. The Bachelor is bound to Maria, who's trying to become Nina, and Aglaya loathes the kains and seeks revenge against them.

While Artemy walks free, he isn't bound to anyone she despies. Not to mention how fascinated she is by Steppe culture and the natural miracles, how excited she is when she finds the town is alive, how much invested she is in Artemy fullfilling his father's inheritance.

UPDATE: The game confirms Aglay is in love with Artemy and not the player, even without the free will. You can talk to her as the player at the end of the game, and she still refuses you and asks for the haruspex back instead. Screenshots here.

I wish there was a timelife where she lives. It seems that it doesn't matter what you do, she will always perish.

A doomed romance, she finally found something in this life worth caring about, someone worth calling her own.

And just when you think you've outsmarted the system and escaped hades, the game steals her away from you and humilates you by making you walk all the way back.

"You really thought it would be this easy?"

"You should've seen this coming"

"What did you ever expect? a happily ever after?"

"That's what you get for attempting to ruin the play, now get back inside."

So you reload an earlier savefile with a bitter taste in your mouth.

You play by their rules this time around.

Do whatever you can to appease the powers that be, keep showing up every day to deliver the best possible performance.

Willingly let yourself become a puppet and never go against the strings pulling you along.

The most painful part, however, is having to reject Aglayas' proposal to run together.

She doesn't understand. She is desperate trying to get you to see her point of view, like you effortlessly did so many times before.

She is confused, why are you suddenly rejecting her ideas, why did your trust in her vanish overnight? Did she do something wrong? Please listen to her. She loves you and wants to live with you.

Please just listen, I'm not lying i swear.

Please come with me.

I love you.

And I can't go on without you.

You have to sit there and deny her request, time after time after time, each more painful than the last. She explains herself, but you won't listen. You can't listen.

Because if you listen, she will die.

You know the future. You're trying to protect her like she has protected you so much before. She can't understand, so she gets hurt. You're whispering sorry to a screen like a fool.

...

..

.

She still dies.

You've hurt her for nothing. She loved you, and in her final moments, you broke her heart.

For nothing.

All of your work and effort, your dignity and pride reduced to mud in which you've rolled through to appease two stupid kids from taking your wife away from you.

Because she still fucking dies the next day.

To rub salt into the wound, her demise is off-screen this time. Like one of the nameless npcs in the number counter of deaths we see at the start of each day.

One of them was Aglaya. Reduced to just a number on a counter, like the thousands before her.

Doomed if you do.

Doomed if you don't.

Used and discarded like an old toy.

A mother's beloved childhood doll.

Was worthy of love afterall.

[scoutswritingcorner]

Red String of What?

Angel Dust X Male Reader

Part One

TW: Alastor being Alastor, threats.

A/N: I love the red string of fate trope.

You find a red string attached to your finger a few weeks before going to live at the Hazbin Hotel. It's quite annoying to say the least but you are a curious man so you go out and follow it.

Walking down the busy sidewalk, you couldn’t help but let your mind wander. Was taking this new job at this ‘Hazbin Hotel’ really worth it? You never really thought of redeeming yourself but the free housing sounded nice. All you really had to do was fix things when they needed to be fixed or put in new things that needed to be replaced, in all honesty this was what you’ve been hoping for; something to keep your mind busy as you try to ignore the burning sensation on your finger. The same finger that had a bright red string attached to it. Truthfully it seemed ironic in the long run..you couldn’t see a lick of color but here you were staring at the bright red string on your finger.

Knocking on the doors of the Hotel you patiently waited for an answer. You didn’t know if you could walk in…that would probably be better than knocking like some door to door salesman. Your hand reaches out about to grab the handle before the doors open to reveal the Princess of Hell herself, the one you ran into a week back. Immediately you watched as her frown literally turned upside down into this huge grin, “You’re here! Did you think about it?” She asked, excitedly bouncing on her feet as she giggled. You wordlessly nodded about to explain yourself but was cutoff as the excited Princess squealed and pulled you inside the Hotel. Almost tripping over your own feet as you are pulled around, despite not being able to see in color it was very obvious half of the building’s colors clashed with one another, you are so glad you don't have to deal with interior design. 

The Princess, Charlie as she asked you to call her, guided you around the hotel giving you a “grand tour” as she called it, from showing you everything on the bottom floor to the top floor. Despite being used to walking up stairs; especially to get to your old apartment, you were quite winded from just walking up a couple flights of stairs. You really needed to get out more..or maybe you could fix up that old elevator that had an 'OUT OF SERVICE' sign attached to the front of the doors, a smirk pulled onto your lips. A big project to help rebuild, something to get your mind off of that stupid red string that seemed to pull and burn every few moments.

“What about that elevator? If I can get it running it could help a lot of sinners who come here.” Your voice called out to her, making Charlie stop dead in her tracks. Turning back to you her smile grew into a grin as she walked over. “You’re right! I just seem to forget about it all the time..it hasn’t worked since I took over the hotel. I truly don’t know what went wrong..I can see if Vaggie or Alastor is willing to lend a hand.” She replied eagerly but you waved her off and smiled. The first real smile you gave in a while, it’s like you couldn’t be mean to her. You would’ve cried if you were mean to such a sweet woman willing to do everything in her power to help you, even if you didn’t believe in redemption. Oh, she was going to be the second death of you.

“No no, I just need to see the floor plans if you still have them by chance and then I need to find where the elevator is exactly.” You chuckled out, rubbing your hands together anxiously as the string got brighter and hotter. Why was it so fucking hot? It felt like it was going to burn your finger off. “Are you okay?” Her voice broke you out of your own mind, concern written all over her face as she reached over to grab your arm but stopped. “Y-Yeah..My finger is just hurting is all…I slammed it into a door earlier.” You lied- you were a horrible fucking liar; you smiled too damn wide and your eyes looked everywhere but where you needed to look. “..Are you sure?” She asked as she moved closer to you.

You sighed, “No…I..” You looked around for a moment before turning back to her. “The string on my finger is bothering me. It has been all week, ever since it showed up it seemingly was almost nonexistent and now? It’s hurting..It’s annoying at best but it gets brighter and tugs more often.” You explained not noticing how Charlie’s face lit up, “And the fact that I’m basically colorblind and can only see this fucking red string attached to my finger is an annoyance of it’s own.” You sighed, “But I’m not here to voice concerns about my own misfortunes, I’m here to help you out. Get this Hotel up and running!” You said clapping your hands together which ultimately made you flinch from how pain erupted from that finger.

Charlie frowned seeing you push away your own discomfort before nodding, “Right! Let me show you where the maintenance room is and then I’ll bring you to your room.” You nodded your head ignoring how you stared back at the moving shadow behind her. Oh no..not him. Please let it just be your fucking imagination and not him. “Is this our newest guest?~” His voice rang out causing you to groan and turn to him.

 “Oh Alastor! Just the man I was looking for.” Charlie hummed, walking over to him “This is our new guest and maintenance man!~” She happily exclaimed. Alastor stared you down for an uncomfortably long minute before he chuckled, “Well it’s lovely to have a fresh and recognizable face here!” He exclaimed, tapping his cane to the ground in a rhythm to a song you couldn’t hear.

“Oh you both know each other?” At the question you let out a low groan and took a step back away from the infamous Radio Demon. “Sadly” You replied cutting him off from another random long winded response causing him to snap his neck towards you. “Sadly? Dear boy, I thought we had a lovely time.” He growled out the radio effect he had making the hair on your arms to stand up, you were not fond of him and he surely was not fond of you. 

“Define ‘lovely time’ because I remember it as you stared at me in my shop as I fixed one of those radio’s you are so fond of, Sir.” You swore if he had your soul you would’ve been double dead by now. No one was able to even look at him wrong and get away with it, not even you. But the way Charlie stepped in between the both of you had deflected some of his unbridled rage. 

“Watch that tongue, Dear Boy. I might just cut it out next time.” He growled out his eyes twitching, “I’m just stating the truth, Sir. You stared at me the whole time, it was weird.” At that he laughed and threw his head back as he stood up taller. Was his horns growing? “Dear boy, you were handling one of my favorite things of course I had to watch you.” You rolled your eyes and let out a loud sigh, “You didn’t have to do anything- I was handling the radio carefully, I’m not as stupid as you think I am.” Charlie lightly chuckled as she pushed you away from a growling Alastor. “Good to know you both don’t get along.” She whispered as you nodded following her softly apologizing for your outburst.

After a little while of showing you where everything was, you finally rested in your own bedroom on the second floor. Something Charlie happily asked for your input just in case, you honestly weren’t expecting to have full freedom on where your bedroom was located and expected to be thrown in a much smaller room than what you got. You didn’t voice your complaints to her or her girlfriend, Vaggie, just in case you were actually going to be thrown in the boiler room. 

Looking around your new bedroom and then down at the string on your finger which was much brighter and was practically burning, you sighed and got up. You would have to call your boss and put in a few days off to make sure everything was moved into this place and out of your old apartment, maybe just maybe this could be a fresh start for you.

[666writingcafe]

Court Transcript

An Excerpt

Craxon: The Society now calls MC onto the stand.

MC, the Defendant, first having been duly sworn in by Societal law, was examined and testified as follows:

Craxon: In your own words, describe what happened in the early hours of July 14.

MC: I was getting ready to go to sleep when Belphegor knocked on my bedroom door. He told me that there was an emergency and that we needed to leave quickly. After changing out of my pajamas, I followed him into the garage, where he proceeded to open a toy chest and pulling out various weapons.

Craxon: Were you handed any of these weapons?

MC: Yes, after he had grabbed the ones he wanted. They were on the small side, and he only gave me a few. I also had my knife on me.

Craxon: Did he explain why you needed weapons?

MC: No. Just that I may need them.

Craxon: What happened next?

MC: Belphegor and I got in one of the cars in the garage and started driving. Once we were on the road, I asked him to tell me what exactly was going on.

Craxon: Why didn't you ask him beforehand?

MC: I've learned not to question demons too much when they tell me that there's an emergency. Mainly because there isn't any time for chit-chat. You often just get thrown into the thick of things.

Craxon: I see. So, what did Belphegor tell you?

MC: That Lord Diavolo left him an encrypted note telling him that he was getting kidnapped and taken to a local amusement park. I told him that an amusement park is a weird place to take someone you've kidnapped, and he explained that whoever did might have needed the space to perform dark magic.

Craxon: How did that make you feel?

MC: Enraged. I didn't want anyone to hurt Lord Diavolo.

Craxon: How come?

MC: Because I care about him.

Avarius: Demon spawn!

MC: I have held my tongue throughout these proceedings, but he is really starting to get on my nerves.

Craxon: Avarius, you have said your piece. Now it is MC's turn. *pauses* MC, you may proceed.

MC: Thank you. So, once Belphegor and I arrived at the amusement park, we walked over to where the circus tents were set up and ducked into the biggest one, hiding behind the bleachers. We saw Lord Diavolo standing inside a salt circle, and shortly after our arrival Avarius and five others enter the tent. Of course, I didn't know who he was until he started interrogating Lord Diavolo and Belphegor hissed his name in disgust. Avarius, on the other hand, knew who I was, although he didn't refer to me by my name.

Craxon: What did he call you?

MC: A half-breed.

Craxon: How did that make you feel?

MC: At first, I had no idea what or who he was referring to, but once he revealed his suspicions of Lord Diavolo sending Solomon to the Society building and having him force the workers to give the 'wretched half-breed' a permit, it wasn't hard to put two and two together. The rage I felt earlier in the car came back in full force.

Craxon: How come?

MC: Because I felt insulted. For one, it's not like I could control the circumstances of my birth--

Avarius: But you chose to conspire with demons! The pacts you have with them make you a half-breed!

MC: *takes a deep breath* Can I speak freely?

Craxon: As long as you know that it'll be on record.

MC: Of course. *pauses* If you're going to bully me, at least get your facts straight. I am part angel, not demon.

Avarius: Liar!

MC: I am literally under the influence of truth serum. How could I possibly lie right now?

Avarius: Demons are immune to truth serum!

MC: With that logic, you might as well throw Lord Diavolo and Belphegor's testimonies right out the window. And Solomon's too while you're at it, because between the seventy-some pacts he has and his immortality, he's even less human than I am.

Craxon: Order!

MC: If you want proof of my ancestry, then here it is. *pushes up their sleeve to reveal a white mark on their shoulder* I am both Lilith's human descendant and angelic successor. Some of her powers passed down to me when I was born.

Craxon: Order!

MC: *sighs* I apologize. As you were saying?

Craxon: *sits in silence*

MC: *twiddles their thumbs*

Craxon: *clears his throat* No more questions.

MC: Are you sure?

Craxon: Yes. I have made my decision. *pauses* At this time, MC is allowed to keep their sorcerer's permit.

Avarius: What?! How?!

MC: For once, I'm in agreement with Avarius. I killed his colleague. Intentionally. That should be grounds for suspension, should it not?

Craxon: You did it to protect someone. To punish you would be to punish those before you, and at that point there may as well not be a Society, because at one point or another, we have all been in your position. *pauses* Furthermore, I, Craxon, award MC with the Star of Diligence.

MC: Thanks...I think.

Avarius: I can't believe this! *storms out of the room*

Craxon: If my records are correct, that only leaves one star left for you to obtain in order to get your license. It is tradition that the Society takes charge of the final test, and I believe I have the perfect one for you.

MC: Should I be worried?

Craxon: Only if you are afraid of what you might see.

MC: What's that supposed to mean?

Craxon: To test your humility, you must be able to not only admit your greatest fear, but to face it head-on. *to an attendant* Fetch the dark red chest and set it in the center of the room.

Attendant: *does what he is told*

Craxon: Inside this chest is a boogeyman. It will transform into your deepest fear the moment it sees you. Your goal is to force it back inside its chest. You can take as much time as you need to mentally prepare, but once the boogeyman is released, you must complete the test. Do you understand?

MC: I do.

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 49 Burnt Cereal with Milk Posting

Alright, dear void. It's time. I put on my powerscaler hat and turned on the stove.

Never ever let me cook again though- apparently I'm just as shitty at it online as I am IRL. We are going to Eye Scars at the temple next. Well, "we" meaning Hakuri, Uruha, and some fodder since the train fight DIDN'T HAPPEN. Yet. Is it too delusional to think that we could get the super cool stuff with Uruha fighting off the mooks somehow? Because damn, I was really looking forward to more than what we got...

It's alright though. I can cope with the power of even stronger delusions.

Wasn't there LITERALLY any better way to do this than pulling on Uruha's hair, Hakuri?!

Still enjoying the fact that Chihiro can yell out a random word and Hakuri will instantly understand his full intent. They don't have to plan shit- they just figure it out and it works.

Yeah, they both would know that "Centipede" is referring to Kyora's usage of Magatsumi's ability, but Chihiro improvising the move on the spot and Hakuri adjusting perfectly is awesome. Sad they're separated for now, but hopefully we get more of this stuff through the whole series. They're so busted when they work together because soulmate coding.

But this new Kuro technique is probably why John keeps pressing the assault and forcing Chihiro to act: he adapts and improves at an incredible rate when he's under pressure. Still don't know why John needs him to be extremely powerful and full of hatred for his plans, but maybe Hiruhiko will spill the beans. He's a chatty bastard who gets his jollies from extreme methods after all.

Fuck these guys.

Hiruhiko is the king of "it's just a prank bro, don't get so upset brooooooooooo" assholes everywhere. His origami powers are pretty neat though, I gotta admit. The editor's note for this week was something along the lines of "Uruha's will is also carried on [Chihiro's] blade"... I want that pretty face to get bloodied and beaten, man. I actually detest flippant long-haired guys as an entire character archetype so please let him have an agonizing death. I want to look forward to it no matter how long it takes.

Speaking of the Hishaku, do they have the world's freakiest training camp for new members or something? Ch. 32

Ch. 49

Literal bloodbath of a series.

This is the second time Chihiro's been blinded with blood in a fight. It's a cool and intelligent tactic but like, why? Use the wrong person's blood and Chihiro will die to some horrible infection or disease before those seeds of hatred can mature, my dudes. But I kinda wonder... Chs. 32 & 49 again:

Hiruhiko proceeds to taunt Chihiro like nothing happened after being violently stabbed out of a moving train.

There's something freaky about how the marked Hishaku members are totally OK with being skewered and losing limbs. Even Chihiro winces in pain when he's hit hard enough to lose his arm, y'know? Is it just because this is an ultra-violent action series and the villains need to stay threatening?

No insights, just pure glazing. This panel absolutely stunning... I can clearly see the motion and imagine exactly how it's happening. I held my breath in anticipation while reading this and was not at all disappointed by the gorgeous spread on the next page. God I love the fights in Kagurabachi.

Yet another "Hakuri needs time to recover" reminder. It's been constant since the arc started in Chapter 45... just for the dramatic tension, probably. I've already said my piece about relying on this particular tool too much, so let's move on.

As this site's #1 Hakuri Agendaposter, I think he's gonna be okay in the short term. We don't know if the Hishaku have accounted for him or not, but the focus right now is on the Bearers. He'll be fine. Surely. I can see him going too far to be "useful" and knocking himself out to transport Kumeyuri and possibly Eye Scar's blade- or maybe Hiyuki to their current location if Hokazono-sensei's feeling funny-, but no torture or suffering flags have been raised. Yet. He's just going to be running on fumes for a while...

Official Tier List Drop

Chihiro corrected Hakuri's "nonsense" estimations for all the powerscalers out there, how kind of him. I kind of went on a fuckhuge tangent here but I can't be assed to retake all the screenshots to post separately. So suffer (or skip if you're sane)!

But who could beat Goku?!?!?!/1/1 Obviously, equipped nuke bearers and Hiyuki are in a class of their own. A step down are uniquely strong fighters like Azami, Shiba, Hiruhiko, and John. Then there's the endless Datenseki fodder who are only scary when they're in a group and not exploded yet.

I don't give a flying fuck about who would win against Ultra SSJ Gigaturbo Pepsimaxx'd Goku. However, I do like it when there are clearly established tiers of power. NOT the graded tiers style where things are neatly ranked from coughing baby to hydrogen bomb, mind you. That is the laziest way to explain a universe's relative power dynamic. It also lets me know that the protagonist is going to single-handedly wreck the balance via powercreep not even halfway through the series (unless it's HxH, which only applies to one series: HxH).

I much prefer Kagurabachi's fuzzy approach. The stakes are clearly established: the Enchanted Blades and Hiyuki's Enkotsu are a Big Fucking Deal. They are incredibly strong and all the characters treat them as such. So Chihiro, Hiyuki, and armed Bearers are at the top.

Yet even within that small selection there's a notable differential in power between those who have mastered the weapon and those who haven't. Chihiro is hella strong, but Shiba let us know early on that he's still got a long way to go before he's truly formidable. We've seen Chihiro get bodied by Sojo, a genius who only had Kuregumo for a few weeks; he's in tune with Enten, but he's got a hell of a lot to learn about fighting strong opponents still. He's probably closer in strength to an Elite Sorcerer than a veteran Bearer like Uruha. (The whole thing about hardly ever fighting fully healed and rested up is also a sticking point, but not gonna digress on that.)

Beneath that tier are strong Elite sorcerers. Azami was noted by Uruha as being as "reassuring" as Hiyuki in terms of his abilities, and Chihiro put Shiba, John, and Hiruhiko on par with him. So I think it's reasonable to infer that the strength of their sorcery and their experience as fighters would put them so close to the Bearers in terms of power. The elite Kamunabi guards and task force, by comparison, make up for their shortcomings by working together as a team. They'd be at the bottom of this category -possibly another step below- individually, but their teamwork and experience put them much closer to a Bearer's strength. The Sazanami Tou would be in this category too despite mostly being off-screened by Shiba (he's just that good).

And then there are run-of-the-mill guys like the Trauma, Mud Clone, and regular Sazanami sorcerers. They're very strong compared to an average person but need those Datenseki shards to compete with the elites. This is the true "miminum strength" floor in Kaugrabachi. If you can't hold your own against a rando sorcerer hireling, you have no business being involved in the fights. Of course the Hiruhikos and Shibas of the world will outclass you horribly, but that's the risk you take when being unnamed fodder in Kagurabachi.

This high of a power floor is why I'm glad we don't see regular people like Hinao anywhere near the skirmishes- a sorcerer can easily manhandle them, and the fights Chihiro gets involved in are far more lethal than they can safely stand around to provide commentary for. This means all the insightful remarks come from the fighters themselves and only rarely an omniscient narrator, which is so much more interesting than listening to a non-combatant give a play-by-play. It's refreshing to see the fighting left to the warriors while the regular folks actually run away to safety for once, you know?

That's a key component of why the fights in Kagurabachi feel so different from other shounen so far. I don't need someone who's never thrown hands telling me how amazing Chihiro looks and explaining what he's doing: the author is showing me while Chihiro himself tells me what he's thinking. And when we do get third-party commentary, it's limited to providing vital context. We aren't wasting panels to glaze the fighters and explain everything in excruciating detail. We just see it play out and understand that yes, this is absolutely awesome and it works because of the quality of the composition. And because we don't need a door stopper of a novel to explain what each ability does (this is JJK shade, come at me).

OK, tangent within a tangent aside... where does that leave outliers like Hakuri, Tafuku, Ice Lady, and unarmed bearers?

Tafuku's sorcery has insane utility, but it looks like he himself doesn't get any direct combat boost. So he really needs a partner like Hiyuki to make the most of it.

I'd say he's probably in the Elite tier considering he has no issues dealing with the rank-and-file sorcerers and guards at the auction. He's plenty used to defending himself while Hiyuki wreaks havoc at least. So the combination of skill, utility, and experience make up for the lack of raw power.

So far it seems as though folks like Char and Ice Lady aren't much better off than non-sorcerers. In fact, we've only seen these traits cause a great deal of suffering at the hands of people who want to exploit them...

Their natural traits seem to provide passive benefits that can negate sorcery side-effects in specific situations (like the nausea caused by Shiba's teleportation in Char's case), but so far there's no evidence that they provide any advantages against actual techniques. They're below the minimum power threshold but a smidge above average civilians for now. This could change if we get more information and examples, though.

So Chihiro said, but...

Dude's still looking mighty fine to me.

If all the former bearers are on the same level as Uruha, then they're not truly "defenseless". However, they definitely do need help when facing Elites and many average sorcerers. They're probably in the middle of the "ordinary" sorcerer tier without their blades- competent against the minimum, but at risk against anything tougher.

So yeah. Uruha's not gonna get shanked by a regular non-magical enemy- he's just defenseless compared to most of the relevant combatants in this universe right now. And as soon as he gets Kumeyuri back, he'll be at the apex. He should be able to handle the trash still on the train just fine until then.

Potential Man incarnate

Hakuri's in a weird spot.

He's the first genius in his clan's 200-year history since the OG patriarch and has a huge amount of potential. Even in the wider world he's quite exceptional for having two sorcery abilities available to him. But the actual mechanics of how he allocates his sorcery and trains it are big unknowns right now. Hakuri's basically got infinite potential, maybe enough to put him in the same tier as the Bearers and Hiyuki. But will he have the time and narrative attention to get there? We don't know. He can't even use his powers without knocking himself out at the moment, so it'll be a while before we see any movement on that too.

He's off to the side with a big question mark over his head for now. I need more information and screen time of him fighting while rested to place him. Which reminds me, actually... Kazane's in the same position. He was supposed to be the trump card in the Sojo fight but lost his arm and most of his comrades before he got to do anything. So he and Hakuri can chill on the sidelines until it's time to see them in action once more.

Thanks for tuning in to the worst cooking show on Tumblr, dear void. Next up: Eye Scars, maybe! Chihiro fighting through the streets to get vengeance on Uruha's behalf! Uruha and Hakuri possibly also making an appearance! Stay fresh, bachibros.

[written-with-blue-ink]

Hi, may I ask you about Ayato x reader who is strong and independent, but she/they like when their partner is protective about them? Be strong and independent is good, but sometimes I think that people right now forgot how comfortable it's feeling when you have person which you can trust and who will take care of you when you have bad day or you feel more fragile etc. I have this problem that I put on myself pressure that I need to be strong 24/7, no place to rest, cry etc, but deep inside I want have opportunity to feel more fragile sometimes. I hope you understand what I want to say. Have good day <3

I got you, i took it in a more literal sense but I think you might like this <3

My Savior

Ayato X Reader

There was something to say about the relationship between the Commissioner of the Kamisato Clan and his Personal Bodyguard. People knew the two were dating but most didn’t know how the two of them came to be except their close proximity. 

The Commisioner, as the most eligible bachelor is Inazuma, was a very indirect man. Born to a well-off family and in a position of power, Ayato was always quiet and silver-tongued when it came to his position.

(Y/N) on the other hand was born to a poorer family, but their expertise in all sorts of combat quickly had them climb up the ranks of the Shuumatsuban. Almost the opposite of their partner, they must’ve been the most straightforward person in Inazuma who was unafraid to speak their mind or get into a scrap over it. 

The two together though were a sight to behold. Ayato pleasantly watches as (Y/N)'s fights in tournaments or (Y/N) subtly shows her disdain for someone's idiotic idea and the two share a look. Silent communication as partners was ingrained into their relationship

The day started off like many others, Ayato and (Y/N) went to the far edge of Inazuma city to scope out the location for a festival in a few weeks. You could faintly see the outline of the old fox shrine off in the distance and the statues that dotted the landscape were perfect for the remembrance put on by the Grand Narukami Shrine and the Raiden Shogun.

(Y/N) played with the cryo vision that hung around their neck as Ayato inspected the land. Eyes glancing at where the stalls would go versus the game stands, neither noticed the shadows moving closer.

“Hey-Mph,” (Y/N) stated as someone grabbed their arms, restricting their movement and causing Ayato to turn around to see nobushi, at least eight of them walking up. Two of them held onto (Y/N)’s arms as they stood still, glancing at Ayato in surprise.

“Well well, Commissioner,” the leader, a kairagi in purple armour, stated coming out from behind his henchman with a deep, booming voice. “Now, I don’t want to hurt you or your little partner here. Just put your hands up and come with us. You’ll be fine till we get the mora for your return.”

Ayato’s attention was never on the kairagi, always on (Y/N) whose eyes met his with a sense of confidence and the slightest, almost imperceivable nod. Quickly and without a word, (Y/N) swung their legs up, contorting their body to knock out the nobushi on their left, a ray of frost seemed to coat the impact on his chest. 

Taking the opening, Ayato swiftly moved forward, summoning his blade and slashing the nobushi on (Y/N)’s right so they had full range of motion. 

Stumbling forward, (Y/N) caught their partner’s shoulder to catch themselves. Summoning their catalyst with their spare hand, a sweet smile appeared as they muttered, “Thank you.”

Ayato simply nodded, eyes glancing at them for a split second to meet admiration and love in their eyes. Shifting the attention back to the armed enemies, he watched as they pulled out their blades and got into position.

Raising his sword, Ayato analyzed his enemies for an opening…. Luckily he didn’t have to wait long.

“Okay, time to pay, assholes,” (Y/N) shouted, running up and decking one of the ronin’s noses and knocking the hat off her, covering it in ice and frost before throwing another punch and landing another blow right in her abdomen. 

Letting out a small chuckle, Ayato released his stress as he rushed forward, taking out two of the disgraced samurai in a single attack.

Both focusing on the battle, Ayato barely saw the kairagi lift his blade, preparing to strike his partner’s back without their knowledge. Instinct kicking in, he left the nobushi and put himself between the blade and his love.

The sound of metal on metal rang in (Y/N)’s ears. Before they could even turn, they heard Ayato’s voice mutter, “Mind the deluge, my love.”

Drops of hydro energy fell from the sky, landing in their hair, they understood the opportunity this made. Pivoting onto their right foot, (Y/N) went around Ayato’s left. They leapt, landing their foot in a small opening of the kairagi’s armor and the combination of the cryo and hydro froze the man in place.

(Y/N) continued to pummel the frozen man, breaking the ice before refreezing him after each strike. They only stopped when the body fell to the ground, ice shattering as the man lay there knocked out cold. 

Turning around, they saw their love over the rest of the nobushi who were also on the ground. Letting out a sigh of relief, they stumble forward and rest their forehead on his collarbone, wrapping their arms around their side. Taking a second to inhale the scent of clean linens and cypress, "Thanks for saving me.”

“Of course,” Ayato cooed, returning the gesture and kissing their hair softly, “I’m just glad you are safe.”