#literally in dream told her about my cousin and she just ??????????????? girl I'm sharing literally one of my deepest traumas rn

[beast-feast]

Many a dream of things that legitimately makes me down. Man . Why'd my fifth grade teacher be mean to me I haven't seen her in like 8 years.

[kingfisher4130]

The Chocolate Caper

Ok so I'm in a creative writing class rn (specifically the creative nonfiction part) and I've just been remembering a lot of random stuff from my childhood in general so I wanted to post this here. Basically it's a very embellished retelling of my 9th birthday party but if you want to be pretentious about it you could say it's a cautionary tale about peer pressure.

Ok, for for my 9th birthday party I'd decided to have a sleepover (I really wanted a pool party but having the misfortune of being born in January and not rich enough to have access to an indoor pool, that was literally impossible). My mom had allowed me to invite four people, so I'd chosen my two best friends and two of my cousins.

Meet the brew: First, there was Emma, my best friend. We'd known each other since kindergarten and did everything together. She had black curly hair that she always kept cut shoulder-length and a huge My Little Pony obsession that she'd passed on to me. At the time we were still holding onto our shared dream of starting a horse ranch together. Yes, we were that kind of horse girl.

Unfortunately, my other friend Audrey, an intelligent strawberry-blonde girl with the memory of an elephant, was unable to attend due to an event at her family's temple (they were Jewish). Maybe if she'd been there, the whole thing would've gone much more smoothly. She had more brain cells than the rest of us combined.

Lauren, my cousin who was older than me by a little less than a year, was the planner. If we decided to do something, Lauren would plan every step to the last second. She'd brush her curtain of long, dark hair behind her shoulder and get right to business.

Alyssa, Lauren's younger sister, was her second-in-command, but if she didn't want to follow orders, she would make it extremely obvious. Her curly brown hair and bubbly personality was the antithesis of Lauren's. She and I loved to match with each other more than with our own sisters. We wore matching teal nightgowns with an ice cream cone print to bed that night and identical sunset orange t-shirts the following day.

My little sister Hailey was the last guest. Even though I hadn't invited her, my mother compelled me to include Hailey in every activity. Funnily enough, it was actually her idea to go through with the Chocolate Caper.

Much to my disappointment, nobody else wanted to watch The Sound of Music (a movie, according to my mother, that I'd had memorized since the age of two, thanks to my great-grandmother who always put it on when she watched me at her house while my mother was at work). Therefore, we retreated to the bedroom Hailey and I shared to turn our bunk bed into a fort. I designated Hailey's bunk (the bottom one) as our headquarters.

"Why?" Hailey asked. It was her favorite word, and every time I heard her ask it I felt a piece of my soul die.

"Because I said so," I told her.

That response usually worked, but since we had company, Hailey wasn't ready to concede so quickly this time. She narrowed her blue-grey eyes at me, put her hands defiantly on her hips, and declared, "Mommy says you're not the boss of me."

I knew this was true, but I was a manipulative little shit, and with our guests intently watching the exchange, I wasn't going to back down and lose my authority as The Birthday Girl. I retorted, "It's my party, and that makes me the boss tonight."

Hailey pouted like a four-year-old (which she was) and let us use her bunk as our headquarters. We hung our blankets down from the top bunk (which had been established by Lauren as our lookout tower), then climbed one by one into Hailey's bed.

We spent two or three minutes staring at each other excitedly. None of us had ever made a fort before. After those first minutes were up, we started to get bored. We'd left our stuffed animals in the living room where we'd be sleeping that night, and nobody wanted to go and get them, leaving nothing for us to do.

Hailey was the first to voice her opinion, since she had no filter whatsoever. "I'm boooored."

"Me, too," Alyssa chimed in. Emma, Lauren, and I all glanced at each other.

"We could play My Little Pony," Emma suggested. It was a game the two of us played at school during recess where we pretended to be two ponies that we'd made up. I was more than willing to play, but everyone else... not so much.

"Sure!" I chirped.

"No!" Everyone else groaned.

"I'm hungry," Hailey complained.

"We can go eat some of the snacks," I suggested half-heartedly, referring to the store-bought plate of baby carrots, grape tomatoes, broccoli, chopped celery, and ranch dressing my mom had prepared for us to snack on while we waited for the pizza to arrive. To five kids under the age of ten, this was less than appetizing.

"But broccoli is yuckyyyy," Hailey whined, once again stating what everyone else was too polite to say. "I want chocolate!"

Chocolate sounded much tastier than the vegetables and ranch. I remembered that we somehow still had plenty of candy leftover from Halloween, and as soon as I mentioned this, we were ready to plot a caper.

Lauren took control and made the plan. Hailey was the lookout. She would check to make sure there were no adults in the kitchen or the living room, where we'd be visible. If the coast was clear, we'd hurry to the kitchen and grab one of the swivelly bar chairs. I was the best at climbing, so I would climb on the chair to reach the candy that was hidden in the highest cabinet to prevent sneaky little girls from eating it when we weren't supposed to. While I did that, Emma and Alyssa would hold the swivelling seat still so I didn't fall. If the adults came, Hailey would report to Lauren and Lauren would stall until the rest of us bagged the loot and made our escape back to our "headquarters."

At first, it all went smoothly. Hailey reported that the adults — my mom, my two aunts, and my grandparents — were outside on the back patio chatting. We hurried unnoticed into the kitchen and set the barstool in place. I climbed up on the chair and opened the cabinet.

That was when my dad entered the house, having just returned home from work.

When I say everyone was scared of my dad, I mean everyone was scared of my dad. My cousins, my friends, even full-grown adult men were scared of my dad. A 6'3", broad-shouldered, stone-faced ex-Marine, the guy was pretty intimidating. To this day I am the only one of my siblings who isn't too scared to argue with him.

Lauren, despite being the adults' favorite, chickened out and was unable to stall him. Hailey couldn't stall to save her life, so our dad walked straight past her into the kitchen, where he found me perched on the bar stool that was being held steady by Emma and Alyssa. All three of us froze when we saw him.

Maybe he was being lenient because it was my birthday, or maybe he was just tired from work, but all he said was a stern, "No. Get down from there."

I was quick to obey, but I doubt it would've made a difference, because all he did was grab a beer from the fridge and head outside, where my grandparents were chatting with my mom and her two sisters, who were visiting for my birthday.

We watched him go, then glanced quickly around at each other, half-terrified that we'd been caught, half-relieved that we weren't in trouble.

I was the first to recover, and I looked accusingly at Lauren and Hailey. Lauren apologized sheepishly.

"He scared me," she admitted, shrugging.

"Guys, this is our chance!" Alyssa said, effectively getting us back on track. I climbed back up onto the chair, opened the cabinet, and fished out the canvas bag in which my mom had stored the candy. Once I'd hopped down, Emma and Alyssa put the chair back, and we hurried back to our fort to begin our saccharine feast.

When my Mom came to tell us that the pizza had arrived and it was time to eat, she found all five of us huddled on Hailey's bed with chocolate all over our faces. I was savoring a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup; Hailey was in the middle of testing how many Milky Way Minis she could fit in her mouth at the same time; Alyssa was working on her eighth fun-size bag of M&Ms; Emma was rifling through the bag for more Almond Joys, and Lauren had just finished her third Tootsie Roll and had begun to unwrap her fourth.

My mom didn't even get mad. She simply burst into hysterical laughter (though I'm not sure if she was actually amused or if she realized how hard it was going to be to get us all to sleep that night after all that sugar we'd just gorged ourselves on) and went to grab the camera.

Everyone, even Alyssa, who ate like a bird, had room for two slices of pizza and a slice of birthday cake. However, right before bed, we were all instructed to put our shoes on and go run laps around the backyard until we had a sugar crash and we were too tired to do anything but troop heavily back into the house, crash on the sofa, and go to sleep.

It was probably the last good birthday party I've had.

[servin-up-surveys]

survey #191

Do you have a large dog? If not, are you afraid of them? No, we literally have a chihuahua lol, but I'm not scared of them at all.

Has anyone ever told you that they loved you, and you didn’t say it back? Yes.

Who is your favorite photographer? Anastasiya Dobrovolskaya. She's well-known for a portrait of three different colored hair women holding three differently colored foxes.

Were you shy in high school? Not very, no.

Did the last guy/girl you kissed have any piercings? No.

Do you actually love your parents? Yes. I feel some amount of soreness and aching over my dad, but I still love him.

Do you know anyone autistic? My niece and very likely myself; I'm finally being examined for it next month.

Do you like your girlfriend’s/boyfriend’s parents? I love his mom, even though I very much disagree with her religious beliefs and how intense she is about them. I never got to meet his dad; Girt's told me that we would've disagreed on a whole lot, and he's always described him as having been a hardass, but I certainly still respect him and how dedicated a husband and father he was.

Do you like Polaroid photography? Yeah, it's very aesthetically pleasing to me.

Who was the last family member of yours that died? One of Mom's cousins recently did.

Do you have any gay family members? Yes, another of Mom's cousins, possibly second or third, idr.

Would you be upset if you caught your boyfriend looking at porn? No, I'd only be upset if he tried to hide that fact from me.

What is your favorite type of cat? Oriental shorthairs.

Who of the opposite sex has seen you at your worst? Either Jason or Girt, I can't decide which instance was really my true "worst."

Were you raised by someone other than your parents? No.

What’s the last chore you did? I emptied the dishwasher.

What is your favorite jungle animal? Probably tigers, or clouded leopards. Or red pandas... lol idk, there are so many.

Is your father injured? He has back problems, but that's all I know.

Are you part Native American? Not to my knowledge, no.

What are your pets’ names? Roman, Venus, and Cookie, whom we didn't name.

Have you ever worked two jobs? No.

What are the names of all the dogs you’ve ever owned? Trigger, Angel, Teddy, Dale, Delilah, Cali, Bentley, and Cookie are the ones I count. I think we briefly had Harley, my older sister's former dog, but it was very short-lived, and we also had a dog for like, not even a week before Cookie, and I can't remember what Mom named her in the brief time she was here, she just wasn't for us.

Would you ever get a face tattoo? It's doubtful. If I do, it would absolutely be something very small and subtle.

Who in life have you felt the strongest need to protect? Probably Jason when he had bronchitis, apparently my "mama bear" response only exists for partners and it's weird.

What is the cruelest thing a person has ever said to you? She basically called me a liar about being traumatized because I "did the same thing to her" and don't even get me fucking started on this shit

Who have you most feared in your life? My dad.

What is your strongest reason for your opinion on abortion? What goes on in someone's own body is fucking nobody else's business. You don't wanna share it with another growing life form, that's your goddamn right.

What one natural thing would you most like to see? Aurora borealis.

Do you like the game Tetris? No, it actually really stresses me out lmao

What’s the most rebellious thing you’ve ever done? I'm unsure.

Have you ever wanted to be a model? No.

Do you like your name how it’s spelled? Actually no, I prefer "Britney" since that's how you *actually* pronounce it.

Who was your first online friend? It was Mazzy!

Your last ex: how did you two get together? I actually had a dream of us together and woke realizing "... oh" lmao.

Does your mom dye her hair? Yes, she's self-conscious of her gray so adds more brown occasionally.

What’s the best kind of video game? (Adventure, shooting, etc) Horror is what I have the most fun with.

Do you know anyone who has road rage? My younger sister does.

Have you ever had a controlling boyfriend/girlfriend? No, I ain't playin that game.

Have you ever tried to break up anyone because YOU liked the guy/girl? So actually no. In the situation where my best friend's boyfriend liked me when I was 12, even though I flirted back, I didn't actually want them to break up. I was just being reckless and dumb and not truly realizing my actions had consequences until he was saying he loved me. I also never actively tried splitting Jason and Ashley up, though boy trust me my bitter ass wanted to, but I had just enough self control to not go 100% child.

Do you draw fanart of anything? Not regularly whatsoever, but I have before.

What was the last music video you watched? Did you like it? "Sport frei" by Lindemann, and it was fine, yeah.

What’s a condition you have that you haven’t been officially diagnosed with? I am like 99.99% sure I'm a high-masking autistic, and apparently ever since childhood, some people (including my mother ofc) have wondered, we just never truly looked into it.

Which one of your parents do you think is smarter? I know Mom is.

Have you ever supported anyone’s Kickstarter? If so, what was it? No, but I would if I had my own income and was exposed to one I really liked.

What band has the power to make you cry by splitting up? Oh Rammstein for sure lol, their retirement probably isn't too terribly far off and it already scares me lmao, I need ONE concert.

Would you feel funny if you kissed somebody of the same sex? I've done this before and no, I didn't feel weird.

Can grills be sexy on a guy? I think they're unattractive on anyone.

What’s your favorite comic book/graphic novel? I don't read these and never really have.

Do you prefer original or sour Skittles? Sour.

Do you find it easy to pass the time or do you get really bored? One of my primary depression symptoms is anhedonia, do the math.

Have you ever been in a Catholic confessional? Yes, don't do this shit to your kids btw, I still hold bitterness over being forced into this as a child.

Who was the last non-relative you rode in a vehicle with? Girt.

What was the title of the last song you listened to? "Altes Fleisch"

Who is the lead singer of your favorite band? Obviously Ozzy himself; Till Lindemann.

Do you expect to be married in the next 2 years? No.

Have you ever had an allergic reaction to an insect? No.

Who IMed you on Facebook last? My friend Summer.

Is there an item that you bought on a whim, but now consider it a crucial part of your life and you would or have purchased it again? Possibly, idk.

What flags do you have in your room, if any? None.

What was the last thing you ate? A sandwich.

What kind of natural disaster is most common where you live? Hurricanes.

Do you or your parents rake your yard? No, it's very environmentally unfriendly anyway.

If you’re not straight, who was the first person you came out to? Sara.

What do you think of the ‘Healthy At Every Size’ movement/philosophy? I don't agree with this, and mind you this is coming from an obese person. I believe it's perfectly possible to not equate one's worth to their weight (like being fatphobic, which is absolutely evil) while still not encouraging bodies that by definition cannot function in a truly healthy manner. I more so believe in "unhealthy at any size," which is just meant to imply that someone's external appearance doesn't automatically decide their health; everyone's body is different, and what goes on inside doesn't always match the exterior.

Where did you meet the last person you swapped numbers with? She's my boyfriend's mother.

Who was the last person to add you as a friend on Facebook? Ariel, who owns the horses I recently took photos of.

[walkingintheheartbreaksatellite]

Ch. 1- Fire Away

Cause I told you my level of concern

But you walked by like you never heard

And you could bring down my level of concern

Just need you to te-'

The eerie voice of Tyler Joseph wakes me, ruining the peaceful dream I was having. I sit up, grabbing my phone and turning off my alarm before plopping back down, groaning as I hit my pillow once again, shutting my eyes.

KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK

I groan once more, grabbing an extra pillow, covering my face as I hear my bedroom door squeak open.

"Em, come on! I agreed to take you to the airport but I've got places to be! Wake your ass up and hurry up or I'm leaving you here!"

Zach, one of my roommates, squeals out before slamming my door. I remove the pillow from over my face and move my duvet back, sitting back up with a groan. I reluctantly get up and change my clothes, grabbing the rest of what I'd be needing before leaving my room. I drop everything by the front door where Zach is standing in a huff.

I then trudge to the shared bathroom and see Aleks already in there brushing his teeth. He smiles a touthpastey smile when he sees me and I give him a weak one, before I grab my own toothbrush and begin to brush in the other sink. I brush and floss before wiping my mouth and leaving the bathroom.

Zach is standing by the front door, a stern expression on his face. I groan, picking up my backpack from off the cold tile floor, slinging it on my shoulders and adjusting it before grabbing my purse.

"Are you finally ready to go?"

I nod and he opens the door with a sigh and I step out, walking to his car and standing by the passenger side door for him to unlock it. Zach follows behind, closing the door to the house behind him and he unlocks his car. I had already put my suitcase in his trunk the night before.

I throw my backpack on the floor before I slip in and sit down. I set my purse down on the floor in between my legs before I reach for the seatbelt and I buckle myself in. Zach gets in on the drivers side and buckles himself in before he turns on the car and backs out of the driveway.

"Geez Zachary, could you be in a better mood?"

He flips me off with his eyes still on the road as he gets in the freeway. I take his aux chord, plugging my phone into it. Which makes him groan for about the hundredth time.

"Seriously? I agreed to take you to the airport so you didn't have to pay for an Uber or for parking for two weeks, but you're gonna make me listen to One Direction at 4:30 in the morning?!"

I snort and shake my head.

"Don't get your panties in a twist Zach. If you must know, I was actually going to put on my alternative playlist, since I know how much you hate listening to Harry Styles, because you're a hater."

He rolls his eyes but I can see a small smile form on his face.

"I mean it's not that I hate him, but literally the last 3, 3! Girls that I dated were crazily obsessed with him and it pretty much over shadowed our relationship and he was all they talked about. I mean you're bad with him, but it's not just him you like and you're at least tolerable."

I snort and throw my head back.

"But you remember when I moved in with you guys? Jenny had enough of hearing about him after only 2 days! I had to learn to tone it down."

He laughs and nods, his eyes still on the road. He gets off the freeway, entering the lane for LAX.

"So remind me why you're going to Ireland in the first place? And for two weeks?"

He parks the car in the parking garage and he looks at me, waiting for my answer.

"We were invited by my cousin. I mean I do have some Irish blood in me, and I also haven't seen my cousin since my great grandfather passed away 8 years ago. And she said she missed me and wanted to fly me and my mom down to see her."

He nods and we both get out of the car. Zach grabs my suitcase from his trunk as I grab my backpack, slipping my arms through the straps before grabbing my purse and shutting the door. Zach waits by the trunk.

"Well, I guess I'll see you in two weeks. Aleks or Jenny said they would pick you up but they would let you know closer to your flight home since I'll be at Dokicon that weekend. Be safe and don't get too drunk, you hear me?"

I giggle and nod walk into his open arms, giving him a quick hug. He kisses the top of my forehead before he lets me go, and I send him a wave, grabbing my suitcase and making my way inside.

I go through the same motions I always do when I fly; quickly checking my bag before impatiently making my way through security, and finally getting some much needed coffee and reasonable breakfast.

Lucky for me, there was a Starbucks near my gate. So of course I treated myself to a caramel crunch frappe and a warm croissant. I munch on my croissant as I make my way to an empty seat and get myself situated. I unlock my phone and I'm only answering emails for about 20 minutes before boarding is called.

I let out a tired sigh before collecting my things and making my way to the boarding line. I had checked in the night before so luckily I got to board fairly early. The second I find a seat, my backpack is pushed under the seat in front of me, and my electronics are switched to airplane mode.

And I'm finally able to let out a relieved sigh. I had spent the past two weeks doing recording session after session, both for myself in my own roles and those I have to fill as a director. Just to be able to enjoy my vacation.

As I have a long flight ahead of me, I decide to treat myself and catch up on some shows. I connect my iPad to the Wi-Fi and start on Psych, evidently restarting it. I get about halfway through season 2 when I see the seatbelt light turn back on in the corner of my eye and a voice coming from the intercom.

"Attention passengers, we will be landing in about ten minutes. Please make sure your seatbelts are fastened and your trays have been secured. Flight attendants will be coming around to collect any trash so please have that ready. It's currently 68 degrees and a sunny afternoon. Welcome to Ireland."

With that, I quickly shoot a text to my cousin, Millie. My mom flew in a day before I did so they are both picking me up from the airport and then we are driving to Millie's house in Mullingar.

Getting off the plane is a slow process, but once I get passed security and I make it to baggage claim, I immediately spot my cousin. She was talking to my mom but the second she sees me, she drops her bag and runs to me and I can't help but laugh. I hoist my purse on my shoulder before opening my arms, waiting to catch her.

The second she hits me, we both come crashing down on the floor in the middle of the airport, nothing but loud giggles coming from the both of us. My mom smiles and shakes her head.

"Girls! For gods sake you're adults! Try to act like it for once!"

We both snort and continue to laugh, but we do get up off the floor. Millie stood up first, holding her hand out to me as she helped me up. She then pulls me into a quick hug before pulling away.

"You've got no idea how excited I've been to finally see you! It's been killin me!"

I smile and pat her back.

"Well, we've got 2 weeks to make up for lost time. What's first?"

She gives me an evil smirk and I already know I'm in trouble. She slings an arm around my neck, rest her hand on my shoulder and she guides me over to grab my suitcase.

"Well dear cousin, since you asked. Since I will not be with you on your 21st birthday and cannot get absolutely shitfaced with you, we are doing it here. We're doing it at home at m' favorite pub. Since you're at least legal here. I think it's only fitting y' get drunk with me first."

I snort.

"Who says I haven't been drunk before?"

She raises her eyebrow and all of a sudden we hear my mother.

"I'm sorry, you what now?!"

Millie and I laugh and I shake my head.

"Nothing Ma, don't get your panties in a twist."

She rolls her eyes and we laugh, finally catching sight of my suitcase. Millie grabs it and we make our way out of the airport to her car. She puts my belongings in the trunk of her Outback before we all get in and start our long drive.

Millie starts the car and pulls out of the parking garage, making her way out of the airport.

"Oh, Aunt Kel, could you hand Em the aux? Figured she'd want it."

My mom groans but takes the cord, handing it to me from behind her.

"I'd rethink that Mills. She's probably gonna put on One Direction or whatever they are. Plug your ears while you can."

I scoff and Millie chuckles as I plug in my phone and scroll through my music library.

"I don't know what yours and Zachary's problems are with One Direction but I was not planning on playing something you liked. Now I've changed my mind."

I settle on what to play, and my mom groans when she hears the first line. Which only makes Millie and I snort.

Oh, well imagine

As I'm pacing the pews in a church corridor

And I can't help but to hear

No, I can't help but to hear and exchanging of words

What a-

My mom turns the volume all the way down and Mille and I groan.

"We were listening to that Ma!"

My mom rolls her eyes.

"You did that to be spiteful, Emily Elizabeth. I'd rather listen to that Harry Styles guy instead of Brendon Urie. God I can't stand him."

Millie looks at me from her mirror and chimes in.

"What about that other guy from One Direction? The blonde one? Isn't he from Mullingar? Put him on."

We both look at my mom and she sighs.

"I guess that's better then Panic. Fine."

I let out a small laugh and I change the music and the first song that pops up is Fire Away and I gasp.

"Mother, turn that shit up I love this song!!!"

They both laugh and I quietly sing along. For the next two hours, my mom and Millie chat as she drives and I quietly sing along to myself in the back seat as I send some texts. The car finally stops and they both turn to look at me and my mom clears her throat, causing me to look up.

"What? Is there something on my face?"

Millie shakes her head.

"No. Jus' wondering if you're actually ready for this."

I scoff.

"Please. Childhood trauma couldn't stop me, neither will alcohol. Bring it the fuck on."

Never in a million years did I think I would regret that statement.

I grab my purse and we all get out of the car, Millie locking it as the last door closes. Standing in front of me is a cozy little bar called The Cherry Bomb.

Millie loops her arm through mine and then my mom's, and she smiles.

"Who's ready t' get fucking trashed?!"

I snort and shake my head.

"I think you're the only one that's gonna get shitfaced Mills."

She gives me an evil grin and drags us inside.

She pulls us over to the bar counter and the bartender looks up at her and smiles when he sees her.

"Well look who came back from the pits of hell! How are ya, Mills? Had any close calls recently?"

She smiles and shakes her head.

"Gee, thanks G. And no, thank you very much. I've learned my lesson. I now carry a box in my bag so therefore there's no reason not to apply the no glove no love rule."

I snort and the older man nods. And then looks to me.

"Is this the cousin I've heard so much about?"

She nods and pulls me up to the bar.

"Em, this is Gerard. This ratty bastard owns the place. He also makes one hell of a fucking mojito. Like it will blow your mind. Give her something good, will ya G?"

Millie takes my wallet out of my purse from my shoulder, pulls out my license and slams it on the counter. He picks it up and inspects it before he nods and hands it back.

"So your cuz over here told me the only time you've gotten drunk was from wine coolers, are you wanting something fruity?"

I take my license off the counter and return it to its place as I shrug.

"I mean I'm honestly down to try anything. Except beer, I'm not really the biggest fan."

He nods and turns around, quickly making something. He pours something into a tall glass and garnishes it with a lime before he slides it over to me. Just as I'm about to take a drink, Millie blocks my mouth and I pout.

"Hold it there little miss, sit yer ass down. You should be sitting for this."

I shrug and sit on the bar stool that she pulled out and I finally take a sip. And within a minute I down the whole thing.

"Shit what was that, that was fucking amazing!"

Gerard laughs and shakes his head.

"Just a Long Island Iced Tea kid, something simple but it'll knock ya off yer ass if you're not careful. Want another or you wanna try something new?"

I think for a minute before sliding the empty glass over to him.

"Surprise me!"

He nods and starts to make another drink.

A few hours pass and I can't tell my right from my left anymore. And I think Millie is recording everything, as I can't seem to control what's coming out of my mouth.

"y' know Millie Billie, I think Zachy really likes One Direction, he jus' needs some more convincing! M-maybe Aleks and Jenny can help me hold him down! Yeah! What do you think?"

She snorts and shakes her head.

"You're so cute I swear. He might actually kill you."

I hiccup and pout and I look up at Gerard.

"One more G? Please?"

He smiles and shakes his head and then turns his attention to someone who walks up next to me.

"There he is! I's wonderin' when you'd be comin in!"

A man, tall, at least taller than me, brunette with pearly blue eyes that I could get lost in and a dazzling smile walks up next to me and nods to Gerard.

"Hey! I've been in London fer some stuff! Told you I'd be back!"

The gorgeous man talks to Gerard, who hands him a beer, and I look lay my head on the bar counter, as it had really started to pound. That is until my fan girl side came out just from hearing the start of a song.

Hey, hey

Oh, no, no, no

Her light is as loud as as many ambulances

As it takes to save a savior, oh

My head shoots up and I gasp.

"Oh my god I fucking love this song!!"

I wince before laying my head back down and Millie snorts, shaking her head at my drunken state. But she's not the only one that laughed. The mystery man next to me did too, and I could feel him take a seat next to me.

"Hey, G, could I maybe get some water or coffee fer this gorgeous girl next t' me? She looks like she could use it right now."

I hear a few muffled words come for Gerard but the only thing I can really focus on is the pounding of my head. All of a sudden though, I feel a poke to my arm and I hesitantly look up.

It was once again the mystery man.

"Hey, ya look like y' could use somethin. Coffee maybe?"

I sit up a bit, still wincing but I nod.

"T-thank you. And I think you're right. I'm definitely gonna feel this in the morning."

He gives me a bright smile and nods and Gerard laughs.

"Y' know, I've been trying to get this one t' stop for a bit and sober up but she refused. She must've listened to ya because yer pretty, ay Niall?"

Gerard pours a cup of coffee and places it on the counter. 'Niall' smiles thanking him with a nod and pushes it over to me.

"Drink. You'll feel better."

I nod and take it, raising it to my mouth and blowing on it before I take a sip. I can't help but wince at the bitter taste but I continue to drink it anyways, knowing it will help. After drinking a bit, I place the cup back down and I turn a little to Niall. I open my mouth to say something but before I can, my phone starts going off.

You can call me when you're lonely

When you can't sleep, I'll be your Temporary Fix

You control me, even if it's-

I pull my phone out of my jacket pocket and groan when I see who's calling. Zach. I can see Niall looking at my phone from the corner of my eye and he frowns. Huh. I hit the answer button and raise it up to my ear.

"Yes Zachary?"

The second his name leaves my lips he begins to scold me.

"Oh don't 'yes Zachary' me missy! You were supposed to tell me when you got there safe! We've all been trying for hours but you won't answer!"

I groan and sigh.

"Zach, please. I am way to fucked up to have you yelling in my ear. I'm fine. Don't you have some sessions to get to? I'm still waiting for your bits for Demon Slayer academy sir."

He groans through the phone and then sighs.

"Okay fine. Just be careful okay? You're a very gullible drunk-"

I groan and quickly bite back.

"Yeah okay whatever. Love you shit face, bye."

With that I hang up and place my phone under my hand on the counter and I sigh. It's quiet for a minute until Niall says something.

"So... One Direction, huh? You like them?"

I blush and shrug.

"A bit, yeah. But Zach, one of my roommates, he's the only one that I actually have a 1D ringtone set for. He can't stand them and so I feel like I have to torture him with it. Just to be a brat. Are you a fan of them, too?"

Niall smiles and shrugs.

"Guess y' could say that. I think I know a few songs. Oh, I must've forgot, 'm Niall by the way."

He holds his hand out for me to take. I shake it with a smile and nod.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Emily. I'm sorry I'm a bit drunk, this was.. um my cousins idea. Not so much a good one since I've kind of gone and embarrassed myself."

He chuckles and shakes his head.

"Not at all. You actually make a cute drunk. Are you from the states? Y' sound like it but I didn't want t' assume anything..."

I blush and smile, nodding.

"I am, yeah. I was born in New Mexico but I'm actually living in LA right now. But I'm here visiting my cousin."

He smiles.

"LA! Really? What do you do fer work if you don't mind me askin?"

I smile and shake my head.

"Not at all. I'm a voice actor. I mostly dub over anime but I've worked on a lot of different projects outside of that. What about you?"

His eyes widen a little and I can't help but stare into them and I can feel myself starting to get lost in them.

"That's amazing! I don't personally watch anime but I've got a friend that does! And I do somethin a bit similar I guess you could say. But I'll just leave it at that, if that's okay?"

I smile and nod.

"Of course! It's your life! You share as much as you want! You seem like a nice guy and if Gerard says you're okay then I believe him."

He chuckles and it's like music to my ears.

"I'd like t' think I'm a nice guy. What about you, though? Are y' always this chatty with strangers."

I snort and shake my head.

"If I was sober, I definitely would not. Especially to someone like you. N-not that there's anything wrong with you I would just probably be too nervous to talk to you because you're really hot- fuck I'm saying too much. Oh god I can't believe I just said all that. I'll just shut up now."

Niall lets out a full belly laugh and I blush.

"Don't worry about it. I'm flattered. And honestly I could say the same about you. Would you maybe want t' , I dunno, get breakfast sometime? Maybe t'morrow if you're free?"

I blush and my jaw drops a little.

"You're- you're asking me out? Like on a date?"

He smiles and nods.

"Yeah.. 'F that's okay with you?"

I blush and nod, causing him to smile.

"Great! D' ya wanna meet outside the pub in the mornin? We could get breakfast if y' want!"

I nod again.

"T-that's sounds great! I'd love to!"

He smiles more and opens his mouth to say something but before he can, Millie walks up between us, throwing an arm around my neck, slinging me into her side.

"Hate to break up the flirt party but I gotta get this little baby home. Say goodbye to your boyfriend Em!"

I blush profusely and shove her off as she laughs.

"Millicent! Shut your trap you ass hat!"

I start to stand up but my legs give out and I fall flat on my ass, causing my mom to laugh and Millie to groan, but I see a bit of worry in Niall's eyes. Millie reaches down to pull me up but Niall shakes his head and stands up himself.

"I got 'er. Just to your car, right?"

She nods and thanks him. He bends down and takes me into his arms, moving one of my arms to wrap around his neck as one of his hands rests on my back and the other holding my legs up. My face is so red, I could blend in with a firetruck.

Niall carries me out to Millie's car, my mom and Mills following behind us as Millie unlocks her car with the fob. My mom opens the back door and Niall leans in and places me in my seat, making me giggle.

"Thank you, Niall. You didn't have to put me in the car."

He smiles and shakes his head as he tugs the seatbelt and buckles me in.

"Just wanted t' make sure you were safe. Tomorrow. 9am?"

I smile and nod. He returns my smile and leans in and pecks my cheek and then waves before he closes the door. I feel my cheeks burn and the second I see him walk back inside, I squeal a little. My mom and Millie get in the car and the second we get to her house, I crash on her couch.

This time I'm ready to run (Oh- oh)

Escape from the city and follow the sun

Cause I wanna be-

I wake up the next morning to my phone going off and my head absolutely pounding. I reach for my phone, shutting off my alarm when I notice the time and my eyes widen and I quickly sit up. It's 8:15. Niall. I'm having breakfast with Niall.

I race into the guest bathroom with a change of clothes and quickly shower and do my hair. The second I come out, I see Millie standing by the door, laughing.

"How ya doin over there? Remember that date you got in like 10 minutes?"

I groan and flip her off and we leave. After about 5 minutes, she drops me off and I wait on the bench out front for Niall, waiting to see if he'll actually show.

WC 4213

Tag list-

@be-with-me-so-happily @fruitmans @buffysimonriley

Okay sooooo idk if anyone cares or not put I just posted a new fic on my Wattpad! It’s a Niall fic! So yeah if you’re interested go check it out. It’s a Niall x Oc fic. It’s called Flicker.

[heartshapedcas]

HI AGAIN MADDY 38, 101, 135

HIIIIII SOPHIE💞

38. Describe your dream girl/guy?

*has sexuality crisis* jk jk. it's just that I'm definitely aspec & never actually been in a relationship so 🤷🏼‍♀️ but hypothetically maybe perhaps it would be nice to be with someone who understood that part of me, someone who is content to share space without always needing to fill it, but who also encourages me to talk about my interests & will be open with me, who likes driving so I don't have to, is generally a positive person, wants to grow and be better, appreciates little things, someone who wants to own a cat or two, who will get along with my family oh no I'm yearning I must stop

101. Do you type fast?

Not really, which is funny bc I'm doing SO much typing on these answers fhdjsjsks

135. Dumbest lie you ever told?

Listen............... So, I started watching supernatural with one of my cousins like years ago and we haven't always lived close so it's taken us a while to get through and we're still not done it. So anyway, when Nov 5th happened we hadn't watched any recently at ALL and it didn't even occur to me to mention that it was all over the internet bc I just thought it was funny. But then I got Into It (obviously) and I'm not used to talking to irl people about my online activities. So like. Basically she doesn't know I have this blog and she doesnt know I know literally everything that happens and she's told me spoilers before like 'so I read a spoiler and apparently cas and dean both die' and I've been like omg nooo *pretends to be shocked* and it's gone too far now and idk how to tell her 🤐😬 help

Ask me things👀

[xhannahbananax03]

Meeting Him

Summary: Dean Winchester arrives in a small town to accompany his best friend, Jake to a high school graduation. He meets Jake’s cousin and instantly takes a liking to her. But when the girls ex boyfriend shows up, things take a turn.

Words: 2.2k

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, slight angst, jealousy, mentions of sexual acts

A/N: This was my first fic ever, so be gentle.

MASTERLIST

It was like any other day.  Get up, get ready for school,  eat breakfast,  and get on the bus.  The only difference of today,  was this was the day your cousin, Jake,  was coming home. 

You and Jake have always been best friends,  you grew up together.  He was 2 years older than you,  but that didn't matter.  You two were always together.  You'd wake up every morning and go straight over to his house,  which wasn't hard because he lived right next door to you.  You both shared so many adventures,  and special moments together.  Like the day his little sister was born.  After Kayla was born you and Jake would always play with her,  whether it be dress up,  or playing in the sandbox.  You couldn't do to much with her though,  considering she was 4 years younger than you,  and 6 years younger than Jake.

  Everything was perfect,  that was until Jake went to high school and you stayed in the junior high.  It wasn't so bad though,  right?  You and Jake still lived so close,  you could still hang out whenever,  right?  Wrong.  Jake started making new friends,  and girlfriends...  It shouldn't have bothered you as much as it had,  but you still got jealous,  when he would say you couldn't come over because Madison,  his girlfriend,  was over,  or because his other friends were over.  It upset you,  and hurt you.  So instead of being in pain,  you decided to distance yourself from Jake. Not asking to come over so much,  going to other people's houses.  It was getting easy to not think about Jake so much.  You made a lot of new friends,  and grew to love them over the two years of junior high. Jake was still pretty happy,  though he missed you too,  but both of you were branching out from each other,  that is until your first year of high school,  he was starting his third year,  him and Madison had already broken up, but he was moving.   Him and his family were moving to Kansas.  Jakes dad got a special,  one time,  job offer that he couldn't turn down.  And you couldn't blame him.  Jake told you that once he gets out of high school he's going to start working with his dad. But he would call and text you whenever he could,  and he would visit as soon as possible. 

So here you were,  getting ready for school.  You only had a couple days left,  and Jake had already graduated,  so he was coming home for the first month of summer.  What you didn't know was he was bringing his best friend. "(y/n),  sweetheart,  breakfast is ready! " Your mom shouted from the bottom of the stairs.  "Ok mom,  give me 5! " You shouted back.   You were standing in front of your closet looking at two outfits you had prepared,  it wasn't to terribly hot,  but it wasn't cold either.  So you decided to go with,

     You did a simple natural make up look,  and lightly curled your (h/l),  (h/c)  hair to give it a beach wave effect. As you came downstairs you got a text, from Jake.

Jake:  Hey (y/nn),  so I know you hate surprises,  but I'm bringing one home with me.  So try not to look like a piece of trash!

You:  Geez,  thanks Jake.  I will try my best not to look like garbage!

Jake:  Thank you,  Madame.

You:  lol,  ❤ you Jake!  Can't wait to see you.  I have some fun stuff planned!

Jake:  ❤ you too, and so do I!  😈

After texting you noticed the time,  "Crap! " You booked it down the stairs,  grabbed your bag,  and a piece of toast.  After shoveling the toast into your mouth you ran outside only to see the bus drive past your house.  "Fuck... " Man you wished you had a car right about now.

~Time Skip to Last Period of the Day~

School went OK today,  you went through all your classes without,  trouble,  hung out with your friends,  which was difficult,  because the kept looking out for this guy in a, "shiny black car ". So they didn't pay much attention to you,  but you were entertained hearing them gawk over this,  " Beautiful mystery man". At one point your best friend,  started talking about what her first date with him would be like,  which had you doubling over in laughter.  

The end of the last period came,  and you couldn't wait to be out of there,  Jake texted you during lunch saying he was picking you up after school and taking you out to eat at the diner,  that was basically your second home.  You were so excited that you were focusing on the clock and only the clock, bouncing you knee up and down.  It got to a point where your friend reached over and placed her hand on your knee. 

"(y/n),  are you alright? " Your friend Sarah asked you,  you just nodded while keeping your eyes on the clock,  "what has you so anxious today? " She asked you trying to look you in the eyes.

. "Jake is coming home today. " You said completely ignoring her face,  but you were able to see a slight blush creep up her face. She had always had a thing for Jake,  but was too scared to tell him.  Right then the bell rung,  and you were up out of your seat before anyone else. 

Grabbing your things you made your way to your locker,  Jake new what your locker number was so when you didn't see him standing there,  you were slightly disappointed.  "Maybe he's just running late"  You thought to yourself.  As you were putting your stuff in your locker,  you grabbed your bag,  and when you closed your locker door,  he was standing right there.  You were so happy you could barely contain it,  you squealed and dropped your bag,  before literally jumping into his arms,  it wasn't an easy task considering he was considerably taller then you,  but you managed.  He held onto you tight and spun you around making you giggle,  once he sat you down, you both smiled at each other,  before he had to go and ruin the moment,  "I got to hand it to you,  (y/n),  you've gotten a lot prettier,  and you don't look like trash! " This made you widen your eyes in mock hurt,  before slugging him in his arm.  Before he had time to grab you,  you were running out of the door,  the one downside,  was you didn't know what car was his,  so you had no where to go.  Before you had time to even turn around he was there and punched you,  actually pretty hard,  well hard enough to knock you on your butt. 

He felt a little bad so he helped you up,  mumbling something about how much that hurt,  you took his hand and stood up.  "Thanks Jake,  now my pants are all dirty. " You said following him to a car.

  "Aww your welcome! " He said enthusiastically. 

Out in the parking lot you could see this beautiful Chevy Impala. "Jake is that your car? " You asked pointing towards your dream car.  "Hmm?  Oh,  that's actually part of the surprise. " You could see a tall man standing at the drivers side door,  talking to the most popular girl in school,  Megan. 

  Megan was a perky blonde.  She was curvy,  but still really skinny, she was so bubbly but still such a bully,  to anyone who she didn't like,  including you.  And she didn't like you because when you came to the high school,  you became one of the most liked girls there,  and not just by guys but by everyone,  because you were sweet,  and caring,  and everyone felt like they could trust you.  Megan was one year ahead of you,  because she skipped a grade.  But you firmly believe that's because she took some,  "extra credit ". And it wasn't just you who thought that,  but that's the kind of girl she is.

  Jake stopped you from walking because he could tell something was wrong,  " Hey you ok? " He asked stepping in front of you,  looking down at you,  you look up and smiled slightly,  "yeah,  but anyways,  who's that guy? " You asked pointing to the guy who was now being pinned to his car by Megan,  it was such a sight to see,  it made you shutter,  Jake saw this and looked over to him,  chuckling a bit,  "always a ladies man, " He chuckled,  "That's dean,  my best friend,  the one i'm always talking about. "

"Oh." Was all you could say, Dean was way more attractive than you thought he'd be, he was probably the one all the girls were talking about,  "Yeah,  he was a hit with the ladies today. " You said starting to walk towards the car again. "Was he a hit with you? " Jake asked surprising you a bit,  "Not particularly. No" You said still walking now a little ahead Jake. 

Finally you reached the car.  And when Megan saw you she gave you a look of pure disgust,  before moving her eyes onto Jake,  she always did have a thing for older guys,  "Hi Jake... " She said biting her lip,  trying to act sexy.   "Hey Megan,  how are you? " Jake never really liked Megan either,  I mean he thought she was hot,  who didn't.  But he just hated her personality,  and the way she treated you.  

"I'm fine,  but would be a lot better if I was in the back of his car tight now. " She giggled,  looking at Dean with predatory eyes,  which for some reason made you jealous,  maybe it was just the fact that she always got what she wanted,  and you did not want have to walk to the diner right now.  Dean looked at Jake with a bit of shock,  but you weren't shocked at all. 

"So,  (y/n),  what are you doing here? " She asked moving her eyes to you,  she was taller than you,  and it wasn't because she was tall,  it was because you were short,  you were probably the shortest girl in the school,  and Megan always wore these high heels. 

"Did you forget that Jakes my cousin? " You asked raising an eyebrow at her.  She just scoffed while rolling her eyes,  "No,  I didn't forget,  I mean what are you doing here,  " She said while pointing to the ground,  "by this car? " "Well if I'm not mistaken,  this is my ride,  right Jake? " You looked to Jake, and so did everyone else,  waiting for an answer,  once he nodded.  You looked back to Megan. She just scoffed before whispering something to Dean before walking off smirking.  He looked a little dazed,  and a bit shocked.  Jake finally cleared his throat also clearing the silence,  that's when Dean really noticed you were there,  which made you a little upset, but whatever.  Reaching out his hand,  he finally spoke,  "oh,  you must be (y/n).  Hi I'm Dean. " You reached for his hand,  and shook it.  Once he realised that he had been holding you hand for a bit too long,  and staring at you,  he retracted before opening the back door for you to get in,  noticing a slight blush on his neck you giggled a little before getting into the beautiful car,  noticing the wonderful leather interior,  running you hands across the seat,  you smiled.  Once you looked up,  you saw Dean was staring at you though the rear view mirror,  you looked down from his intense gaze, blushing.  

"Do you like her?  She's beautiful isn't she? "He asked starting up the car,  which cause a low rumbling feeling through the your whole body.  " Like her?  It's my dream car,  this exact model and everything! " You said a bit excited which made him chuckle a bit.  Jake was just enjoying that fact that he two best friends were getting along.  Once Dean started driving you saw how well he handled the car,  before he left,  you'd definitely have to see if you could drive this car.   "Do you mind if I turn on some music? " He asked looking at you while reaching for a box full of cassettes.  "Not at all, go for it. " You told him smiling hoping he had a somewhat similar music taste to yours.  He then handed you the box full of tapes before saying,  "choose one. " Which for some reason surprised Jake,  but you just shrugged it off.  

Once you saw the tapes you become even more happy,  if that's possible.  He had the same music taste as you!  You were really starting to like this Dean guy. Grabbing an AC DC tape and handing it to him,  you saw his smile grow wider,  "You've got good taste." He said,  which made you smile even more. He popped the tape in before turning up up the volume,  and blasting AC DC through the speakers.  This was going to be fun!

[soybeantree]

pairing: johnny x reader

genre/warning: fluff, magic!au

word count: 3k

description: you hated him. his stupid face smiling. his stupid charisma that would always woo the customers - of which you had no doubt was aided by the use of magic. his stupid cousin - that you actually adored and would kill to have him even notice you, but who continuously chose johnny over you for assistance. and most of all you hated how your lungs forgot their one job whenever he was within 5 feet of you.  

a/n: from the essem: rosemary by moonlight universe. not necessary to read that first, but some things may not make complete sense.

"I'd like an iced caramel Frappuccino with low fat milk and a pump of pep. To go." The customer rattles off her order as she approaches the counter, never sparing you a greeting or even a glance. From her clean-cut bob to her khaki shorts and salmon button down, you know exactly how this conversation is going to go.

Contorting your cheeks into your best customer service smile and using your most pleasant tone, you inform her, "I'm sorry ma'am, but any drinks with magical add-ins must be consumed within the cafe."

Now, she glances at you, her wallet poised in her hand as her face falls into what you refer to as the entitled scowl. "Excuse me?"

“Any drinks with magical add-ins must be consumed within the café.” You repeat, despite the fact that you enunciated clearly the first time. To help with any possible confusion, you gesture to the bright golden script at the bottom of the menu which states the same.

The woman scoffs, and you inhale a deep, imperceptible breath. “Why?” Indignation laces the word and colors her cheeks red.

Many reasons. Most of which revolve around negligence and exploitation, but that explanation drags. Reminding yourself that you want this job and have jumped through hoops to get it, you dredge up every ounce of patience in your body. With a smile still in place, you say. “We strive to abide by the standards set forth within the Council’s Magical Charter. I would be more than happy to complete your order, but any drink with magical add-ins must be consumed on property.”

“I-“ You brace yourself for the entitled tirade, but the woman’s face melts into a bewildered smile. A glance over your shoulder reveals the reason. Johnny, your fellow barista, stands behind you, his cheeks pulled back by a swoon worthy grin. 

With a sigh, you step away from the counter and let Johnny work his magic. Quite literally. Johnny, like you, has the skill of enchantment. As a member of the Essem Family, he has had access to training and knowledge all his life. You on the other hand come from a no name family who has one grimoire passed down from generation to generation, and the two-page section on enchantment only works for curing melancholy. 

In moments, Johnny has the woman pacified with an iced caramel Frappuccino with low fat milk and no pump of pep, to go. She sends him another smile before she nearly collides with the door on her way out. After a giggle which Johnny echoes, she is gone, and you’re ready to vomit. 

"Did you add a shot of charm to your coffee this morning?" You ask as you resume your position.

Johnny flashes you a grin while raising a single smug eyebrow. "No, I'm just naturally this charming." You gag as you turn away which elicits a chuckle from him. “What, you don’t think I’m charming?”

“I think you are a talented witch.” You say as you reorganize your station. While leaning over the counter to schmooze the woman, Johnny managed to throw the entire place into disarray. You return the business cards to their holder and the pencils to their cup.

“You really think I’m using magic when I calm irritated customers?” 

A twang in his voice draws your attention back to him. Glancing over your shoulder, your stomach twists. For such a tall man, he can make himself appear so small. His shoulders hunch in as he fiddles with the ties on his apron. The posture throws his long bangs into his eyes, obscuring them from your scrutiny.

The answer to his question is “yes”, but the answer brews from a petty spite which you stoke every time Minseok, the café’s owner and the foremost expert on enchantment magic, chooses him as an assistant over you. The whole reason you strived for a position at the café was to become Minseok’s apprentice, but every day he chooses Johnny to help with his brews. While you enjoy blaming Johnny, you know the favoritism is due to the inclusiveness of the covens. After all, Johnny is Minseok’s cousin. 

“Since when do you care what I think? I thought I was just the hired help.” 

His head snaps up, the ties of his apron forgotten as he gazes into your eyes. The contact cools your spite, and it sours. Your stomach rolls at the discomfort, and you clear your throat and return to your reorganization.  

“Minseok doesn’t hire just anyone to help in the café.”

You know this. You badgered him for a job ever since Johnny told you about his cousin and his café. Minseok had been the sole employee for years after the café’s inception, hiring Johnny only when the café’s popularity grew. Eventually, the work became too much for the two of them, and rather than hire a qualified enchantment witch, Minseok had hired the girl with little-to-no skill who practically lived at the shop.

“Whatever.” You grumble as you throw another pencil into the holder. The force sends the jar spinning. It falls on its side spilling its contents across the counter. With a growl, you reach for the scattered pencils, but Johnny’s long arms reach around you. The pencils disappear into one hand as his other rights the holder before returning the contents. 

You duck out from under Johnny’s unintentional embrace, your cheeks burning. He has to be using his magic. You hold tight to this belief as you breathe to calm your racing heart. 

“Minseok likes having you here. You’re as detail oriented as he is.” Johnny nods to the front and back counters both of which have everything in their place and a place for everything. “I’m pretty certain you’re the only person in the world who understands his organizational method.”

“It’s not that hard. Ingredients are organized first by purchase date and then alphabetical. Supplies are..." You trail off as you catch sight of Johnny’s smirk out of the corner of your eye. “You really expect me not to think you’re using magic when you always seem to know exactly what to say to distract me?”

He shrugs, but his smirk only grows. “There are other reasons, I might know that.” Before you can question him further, the bell above the front door jingles. “Duty calls.” He tips his head to you before disappearing back into the brewing room. 

With a deep breath, you shove the conversation from your mind and rattle off the customary greeting as you turn to face the new customer. 

“Good morning, Y/N. How goes the grind?” You blink a moment as your brain registers that your cousin is here. She misses your confusion as she is too busy chuckling at her pun.

"It’s great. How goes your fruitless endeavor to start a school of magic?"

She scowls which brings a genuine smile to your face. "It's not fruitless. It's slow moving because covens are full of stuck up assholes who refuse to share their knowledge because of what? They're afraid it will diminish their power and their prestige. They need to get their heads out of their asses and think about how much better the world would be if we all worked together and shared our knowledge." 

This tirade is as familiar as the Entitled tirade. "And yet, you always get coffee at an Essem café?" You comment as you punch her order into the register.

"Minseok has the best coffee.” She hands you her card. “Everyone in the city knows that. Everyone in the world probably knows it too."

"But you're supporting the coven with the most stuck up assholes." You return the card to her.

"You're working at the coffee shop."

"But I don't have the same issues with them that you do." Not mostly at least. You would appreciate it if Minseok occasionally asked you back into the brewing room. 

She shrugs. “Did you place that order for here or to go?”

“To go?” You raise a brow. 

“I need it for here.”

“Why?” You stretch the word into two syllables. 

“Because I’m staying here.” Rolling your eyes, you adjust the order. "I'm supposed to be meeting up with Yuri." She explains as she checks her watch. "But, she's late as usual."

Your finger pauses above the register as you gawk at your cousin. "Yuri? As in the hedge-witch of the Stahn Family?"

"Yuri is much more than a hedge witch."

"Okay, whatever,” You hold up your hands, stopping whatever tirade she will surely start. “But she’s a Stahn and this is an Essem cafe?"

"Yes,” she crosses her arm, and there is no stopping this coming tirade. “Why is it so hard to understand what me and the Fantagios are trying to do? We want to create a world where people can see beyond their family covens and share knowledge for the benefit of the world."

Leaning forward, you shorten the distance between you and your cousin. The more heated she becomes the louder she gets. The customers have already started to side eye her, and the last thing you need is for Johnny and, especially, Minseok to hear her. "That's great and all. But your dream is not reality and you agreed to meet up with a Stahn on Essem territory. They're basically mortal enemies. This could end in bloodshed, and I could lose my job because I'm related to you."

"Calm down. Yuri wouldn't have agreed to meet here if she was worried for her safety."

You swallow your rebuttal as you hear the hinges of the brewing room door squeak. Your cousin’s eyes grow to the size of saucers, and you wonder why Minseok is delivering her coffee. He rarely leaves the brewing room, leaving all the deliveries to Johnny.

Minseok extends a mug to your cousin who whimpers a “thank you” as she takes it. She sips. Her cheeks flush, but whether that is due to Minseok or the heat of the coffee only your cousin knows. 

“Is it good?” Minseok’s question raises one of your brows. In the year and a half that you’ve been working for Minseok, you have never heard him ask a customer’s opinion of his work. Pink tinges the tips of his ears, and you have to refrain from pinching yourself. Maybe, this whole day has been a dream.

“It’s delicious.” Your cousin, the queen of social justice tirades, simpers.

The nausea from earlier returns as you suffer through the ensuing conversation. Despite your effort to tune it out, you hear Minseok comment on your cousin’s frequent visits to the café. She explains that you’re her cousin, which you wish she would have left out given what is about to happen, and that he makes the best coffee in the city. His whole ears brighten at the compliment, the red creeping into his cheeks. Surely, a customer is bound to come in soon and end this disgusting display of emotions.

“Y/N can keep you company while you wait.”

 Your name snaps your attention back to the conversation. You blink as you search your brain for the lead into the statement but find nothing. “What?”

 “I was telling Uko,” Your cousin must have introduced herself while you attempted disassociation, “that you can take your break early to wait with her.”

“Oh, I mean sure if you’re okay with that.” The look on Minseok’s face screams that he would be okay with anything that your cousin wanted. 

“Go ahead.” He motions for you to be on your way, and with a slight nod, you head into the brewing room which offers the exit into the main area.

Johnny, busy at a cauldron, eyes you as you walk past him and remove your apron. “Where are you going?”

“I’m taking my break.” You say with a shake of your head as you hang your apron on its hook.

A glance at the clock scrunches up Johnny’s face and puffs out his already large lips. “But, your break’s in an hour?”

“Listen,” you say, turning to face him completely. “I don’t know what I just witnessed out there.” You gesture to the door behind which you are certain the uncomfortable situation is continuing. “But, Minseok said go to break, so I am going to break.”

“What did you witness?” Johnny grabs a mortar and pestle from the counter and adds three pinches to his cauldron. A faint smell of strawberries wafts through the room bringing with it the image of sunlight fields and a gentle breeze. He’s brewing happiness. The ingredient he added was green. Was it an herb? A stone? A mixture of different things? “Y/N?”

“What?” Your mind snaps back to the moment as you remember that Johnny did ask a question. “Is your cousin dating anyone?” You ask rather than answer.

Johnny pauses mid-stir and stares at you. “No.” He draws out the word as he slowly starts to stir the cauldron counter clockwise. “Are you asking for a friend?”

Your eyes narrow at his tone. “No, I’m asking because he’s currently flirting with my cousin, and it’s gross.”

“What?!” His whole face lights up, and he nearly spills the cauldron in his haste to reach the door to the order counter. Sprinting across the room, you reach the door before he does and block it with your body.

“What are you doing?” You pant as your lungs struggle to refill.

“Our family, at least the cool people in our family, have a bet going that Minseok has a wife and two kids in hiding or that he is a celibate monk. I bet that he hasn’t found the right one. Now move, so I can prove I was right and win the bet.” He tries to shove you to the side, but you dig your heels in and refuse to budge. “Come on.” He whines, pulling his bottom lip up into a pout.

“If you want me to move, then you had better use your magic because this is already ridiculous enough.” Fortifying yourself for the oncoming attack, you blink in surprise when Johnny steps back with a shrug.

“I don’t need to. I can ask Minseok about it when he comes back here.” He returns to the cauldron. The potion has turned a putrid shade of green, and Johnny hisses as he tries to fix the problem. 

Staying would provide you valuable knowledge, but Minseok has yet to approve your assistance with the brewing. Staying also means you would witness the next installment of this non-thrilling saga.

Minseok and your cousin are still talking when you exit the brewing room into the main area. They probably haven’t even realized how long you’ve been gone or that their conversation was almost interrupted by an overly inquisitive mind.  

“There’s a free table over there.” You bust into the middle of a conversation about magical vs. non-magical cleaning products. 

“Right.” Your cousin looks to you, then back to Minseok. “It was very nice talking with you.” Her smile stretches across her face. “Maybe we could talk more later.”

Minseok’s smile is more subdued than your cousin’s, but it’s more than what you witness on a typical Tuesday. “Yes, I would like that.”

“Minseok.” Johnny’s head pops out of the brewing room. “I need your help with something.” The stench of rotten fruit leaks through the open door. Minseok mutters a quick apology before disappearing into the brewing room. 

You take a seat at the free table, a smug smile on your face. Your cousin is slower to take her seat, her smile still in place. “Is this really the first time you’ve met Minseok?” You ask when she finally settles in her seat.

“Yes,” she answers though her eyes remain on the brewing room door. “He had already graduated when I started high school. I heard about him from the upperclassmen, but they did not do him justice. He is one fine man.”

“Gross. Can you take your thirsty ass and get out of my place of work?”

“You work in a coffee shop, a place where thirsty people are literally supposed to come.” She quips back, finally glancing at you.

“Please, people don’t come to cafes because they’re thirsty. They come to work, socialize, or take aesthetic photos, and maybe sometimes for caffeine.” 

Before she can formulate a rebuttal, the bell above the front door jingles, and in walks the reason for your cousin’s visit. In your disgust, you had forgotten the threat to your job. Panic races through your veins as your attention shifts to the counter. You wish for all the luck in the world, but luck abandons you. Instead of Johnny coming to greet the new customer, Minseok emerges once again. Habit controls him as he smiles and gives the customary greeting. Only after the last word leaves his mouth does recognition register in his eyes. 

"Yuri." The name is a question and a greeting.

The hedge-witch tilts her head a fraction of a degree in the semblance of a nod. "Minseok." She returns the greeting. You wait - breath held, heart racing - for the coming altercation.

"Kyungsoo's been looking for you. He seems to be worried about something. Is everything okay?"

"You can mind your own damn business." She huffs, her arms crossing over her chest.

You flinch, but Minseok chuckles. "I'm merely a messenger."

"Well messenger, you can tell Kyungsoo - and please make this verbatim - 'I'm fine. Thank you. You can suck my dick'."

Minseok jots the message down on his guest check book, glancing up at Yuri when he finishes. "Anything else?"

"No, that's all."

"Would you like to order anything?"

"Hell, no. I'm here to meet with someone." She glances around the shop. 

You shrink down in your chair, hoping to avoid detection, but your cousin shreds that hope. She waves her hand, drawing both of their attention to you two. Minseok’s eyes rest on you for a moment before shifting to your cousin. 

Yuri returns the wave as she walks to your table. "Hey Uko, sorry I'm late. The potion needed to brew a little longer this morning than I anticipated. I blame this muggy weather. It's messing with everything I make. Is this your cousin?" She nods to you as she plunks into the last of the three chairs at your table. Uko nods her head. "Nice to meet you."

"You might not think it's so nice. She works here."

A hiss slips out as Yuri shakes her head. "Why must the young always be corrupted?"

"Don't worry. I might not have a job for much longer." You sigh as you push yourself out of your chair. "Breaks over. I’ll find out soon enough if I do or not."

"Minseok might be an Essem, but he's not going to fire you because you have a connection to me.” Yuri assures you. “If he does though, let me know and I'll kick his ass." Yuri grins, showing all of her teeth, and you chuckle despite the anxieties waging war in your stomach.

Walking back into the brewing room, you grab your apron and slip it on while keeping your back to Minseok and Johnny. With a deep breath, you turn to face them. Johnny stands over the cauldron which is a deep forest green and simmering pleasantly. You breathe in the smell of strawberries and hope the happiness has rubbed off on Minseok who is standing beside Johnny and whispering instructions. 

With a glance up, Minseok pats Johnny on the shoulder and walks towards you. Lifting leaden feet, you meet him by the door to the ordering counter. 

A volley of words waits on your tongue, but they retreat when Minseok asks, “Can you give this to your cousin?” The “this” he is referring to is a folded scrap of paper.

You take the paper, nodding as you slip it into the back pocket of your jeans. “Sure. What is it?”

A small smile lifts his cheeks, and his voice is soft when he says, “My number.”

You choke on your response, and you can hear Johnny chuckling as you attempt to regain your breath. Minseok offers to get you a drink, but you wave off his concern. “What?” You finally manage to get out.

“I forgot to ask for your cousin’s number when we were talking.” He pouts. “I was hoping you would give her mine and tell her she can text me whenever.” 

“Sure.” You pause before asking, “Should I go back to work now?”

“Of course.” His response is instantaneous and a flood of relief washes through you. “And thank you.” He adds, the corners of his mouth quirking up. With a nod, he returns to Johnny’s side. 

Exiting the brewing room, you shake your head. On the plus side, you still have your job. On the negative side, your cousin might start dating your boss which may not be a complete negative but it definitely isn’t a positive.

[mymymymyonlyangel-blog]

baby shower // h.s.

a/n: okay this is the first one shot i’ve ever written so please bare with me. i tried to make it cute and stuff but i think i got sidetracked so i’m sorry. some constructive criticism would be highly appreciated! enjoy! -a. 

You and Harry had been dating for a while, almost five years, and you were head over heels for him. He was, for lack of a better and less cheesy word, your soulmate. His family loved you and your family loved him, so when your older sister invited the two of you to her baby shower Harry was ecstatic. It was a very well known fact that Harry adored kids, and parties with your family always had kids running around. Your cousins and extended family just did not stop having kids.

When you arrived to your sister's house, you could hear music coming from the backyard so you and Harry went around the back and let yourselves in. As soon as you made it to where the real party was, your sister, Mia, called out for you.

"Y/N!" She walked over hurriedly, abandoning her other guests to greet you, "I'm so glad you guys could make it!" 

"You know we would never miss it! Harry wanted to come to this baby shower probably more than me."

"It's true," he spoke up. "How are you? I'm guessing you don't know the sex of the baby by the decorations."

The backyard was decorated totally pink on one side and totally blue on the other. The pink side had a pink sign saying "It's a girl!" and a bunch of pink party favors, including pins that had the same phrase. The blue side looked the same except it was decked out with blue party favors, along with the pins and sign saying "It's a boy!" You were very glad in that moment that your gift was a gender neutral yellow outfit.

"Nope! The only people who know are my doctor and mom. I think it's gonna be a boy. Josh thinks it's gonna be a girl though," she replied. Harry smiled at her enthusiasm and turned to you.

"Well, I guess we should figure out what we think," you said smiling at Harry and then your sister. "See you in a bit yeah?"

"Oh yeah of course!" Mia was literally glowing. "Don't forget to put on a pink or blue pin though!"

With that she went away to find her husband Josh. You and Harry wandered around greeting relatives and friends after placing your gift on the gift table, the whole time Harry's arm was slung loosely around your hips. "Just to keep you close," he said, until he saw your cousin's three year old daughter, Ava, and he instantly let go of you to pick her up.

"Y/N, look at how big she's gotten!" he said with the biggest smile on his face.

"Ava! You're so cute!" Ava giggled like Harry had just told the funniest joke ever. You and your cousin, Sofia, laughed at how cute their interaction was. The last time Harry, or you, had seen Ava was almost a year ago and she had adored Harry. Just like right now, she had the time of her life with Harry.

"You can take her with you for the rest of the party if you'd like," said Sofia. "She'd probably enjoy it more with you than sitting here listening to me talk to everyone the whole time."

"Really?" Harry sounded, and looked, so excited. "You don't mind?"

"No of course not! Just come back when she needs a diaper change or something." And with that, Harry gave you a quick kiss on the cheek and left to play with Ava around the backyard. You and your cousin watched them for a bit before just making light conversation about anything and everything; your sister, the sex of the baby, when you and Harry were getting married and starting a family of your own, etc. 

Harry came back in an hour to have Ava's diaper changed when your sister announced that there would be games played soon, girl team against boy team. Harry had decided he thought the baby would be a girl and you thought otherwise, so you decided to play each game against each other for a few games.

The first game was probably your favorite. You had to hold a potato between your thighs, walk across the backyard, and drop the potato into a mug on the ground. Walking with the potato was easy enough for you, but Harry was struggling. You could see him failing to even keep the potato between his thighs let alone walk with it.

"Love," he said to you, exasperated. "How on Earth are you doing that?"

Everyone was cheering for you but you started laughing at Harry and almost lost your grip on the potato. With that Harry got a little boost of confidence and was able to catch up to you. Now you were neck and neck to reach the mugs. As soon as you got to them, with your facial expressions and frustrated cursing, you both looked like you were in the woods struggling to find a place to poop. 

However with the sounds of everyone yelling you lost your grip on the potato and it fell from between your thighs, landing right next to your mug. You yelled angrily and just watched Harry struggle to aim his potato. Finally he dropped it, and to your dismay, it landed in the mug. Cheers erupted from all around you and Harry had a smug grin on his face as he shrugged to you.

"Sorry babe," he shouted over everyone's cheers. "I guess I'm just better at holding my potatoes than you are." You snorted at that and playfully hit his arm.

"Okay Har " you said with a laugh. He claimed his prize of a pink chocolate and the two of you sat side by side at a table with your mom. Harry tried to get the sex of the baby out of her, but she wasn't cracking. He gave up and went to play tag  with the little kids.

"So when are you and Harry having kids?" Your mom questioned, making you choke on your own spit due to her abruptness.

"Mom," you replied after clearing your throat. "We're not even married! We're just enjoying our lives together."

"I know... but he's my dream son-in-law, and you’ve been together for quite a while now. Look at how good he is with kids!" she gestured his direction. You looked over to see him sitting on the grass letting Ava play with his hair while he played patty cake with another one of your cousin's son. It made your heart flutter to see how much he was enjoying himself with them. You definitely could see yourself marrying, and having kids with him in the future. He felt your stare on him and turned to look at you. You waved to him, smiling, and he gave you the biggest smile he could manage.

After a few more games and cake, it was time for the big reveal. Your sister's husband, Josh, was holding a black balloon, and your sister was holding a safety pin to pop it. Everyone was getting loud and you could tell they were all extremely excited. You felt Harry come up behind you, placing his hands on your hips and his head on your shoulder. 

"This was so much fun," he said to you, loud enough for you to hear but quiet enough so no one else did. "Can we have a baby shower like this when we have kids?"

You felt your stomach doing flips and turned your body to face him, only to see him smiling at you from ear to ear. You placed your arms loosely around his neck and smiled right back at him, just as big.

"You really want to have kids with me?" he nodded to you with absolutely no hesitation.

"Do you think I would be with you for five years if I didn't?" he said teasingly. You reached your head up to give him a passionate kiss. He tried to deepen the kiss but couldn't because your sister called the two of you out.

"Hey Harry and Y/N," she shouted as you stepped back from Harry, giddy from the kiss you just shared. "If you could not suck face for about five minutes so we can find out the gender of my baby that would be great!"

Harry giggled and apologized. With that, everyone turned their attention to Mia and Josh, and started a countdown from ten. When the countdown ended Mia popped the balloon and pink glitter fell all over the grass at their feet. Everyone cheered as Josh and Mia embraced, you could see that Mia was crying tears of joy and Josh was smiling from ear to ear.

"I knew it!" Harry said to you, "Just had a gut feeling it would be a girl."

Later when you had left the party and were back home with Harry, you were laying in bed talking about your future before dozing off.

"I want six kids," Harry whispered to you, clearly half asleep. You snorted at how ridiculous it would be to have that many kids.

"Do you plan on giving birth to that many children yourself?" He pulls you in to his chest and nuzzles his head into the crook of your neck.

"Yeah," he mumbled, "all six of them."

"Good luck with that Har." He didn't respond and soon enough you could hear him beginning to snore softly. With a smile on your face, you drifted off to sleep thinking about how you would love to have as many kids with Harry as your hearts desired.

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: Is the baby still at ours? Janis: Iggy just told me Janis: What's going on Grace: They came and got her not long ago Grace: It's wild! Grace: How much did Iggy even tell you, like omg?! Janis: You know, he's Mr. CCC about fucking everything Janis: if any of the rest of yous had said something, I'd have thought you was taking the piss Janis: Is she even allowed to do this? Janis: Last I heard was Rio wants the baby back and Junie don't want it Janis: Ma just standing there holding it like umm 😂 Grace: Exactly why I let him do the honors Grace: Obvs! The baby came out of her she can do what she wants Janis: I dunna, surely Demi gets a say Janis: This is fuuuuucked, man Grace: Duh! He's still her dad Grace: They'll have to share Grace: Awkward Janis: Literally, how is that gonna work Janis: if Junie's dumping him Janis: Fucking hell, do we still have to have him over for family functions Grace: Idek Grace: Doubt it. Buster doesn't parade his exes around at them Grace: It'll be like that, I guess Janis: 🙄 Janis: As if they weren't becoming enough of a who's who of has beens Janis: Dying Janis: Why did they think this was a good idea, again? Grace: I'm like, did they even? Junie obvs didn't Grace: Ugh Grace: Only this family omg Janis: Well that's a whole 'nother situation Janis: he's JUST had his 22nd, literally yesterday Janis: and it's his first boyfriend Janis: Yeah, time to go get a baby and a ring Janis: Ma and Pa got 'em fucked up Grace: So true Grace: It's cringe that that's ancient by ma's standards, babes Grace: And that this fam can't go a year without bringing the drama Grace: Remind me of all this if I ever ask you to have a baby for me Janis: Literally bitch, we was cooking by then Janis: she's insane, not a role model, like Janis: Ha, you'd never Janis: Could turn out like me Janis: You'd die Grace: omg ew Grace: let's cancel that idea forever Grace: by the time I get a new man you'll have 4 with barista boy anyways obvs Grace: no room in the oven, honey Janis: Planning on taking forever, are ya? Janis: 🤢 Leave off Grace: Yeah. Single and loving it, thank you, bitch Grace: You're gonna make loads of cute babies with him and you know it Janis: Good, 'cos how embarrassing to have your baby drama overshadowed by Ri's like Janis: Can't have that Janis: Nu-uh, count me on team Junie, for the first time in probably ever, like Grace: Sure Jan Grace: I'll believe that when I see it Grace: 😂 Janis: See the lack of babies dropping out me, like Grace: I'll see you pushing a twin pram Grace: 💕 Janis: Oh no Janis: Can you imagine Janis: War flashbacks Janis: Not again Grace: I thought Ri was gonna have twins Grace: Double the drama Janis: Could take one each and bounce, tho Janis: Be helpful now Grace: OMG Grace: One randomly has a american accent too Grace: Amazing Janis: Demi would love it Janis: The theatrics Janis: He can't even deny it Grace: I wonder if he'll still go to Paris Janis: I would Janis: What's he going to do here? Janis: God I hope so, can't deal with the moping and shit Grace: Um, be a dad like he was so desperate too, I'd hope Janis: Yeah how bad he gonna want that now he can't have his designer gaybie Grace: He still has her though Grace: Rio isn't going to stop him seeing her or anything Janis: It ain't the same though, is it Janis: Not the dream he was buying into Grace: Duh, but if he wants Venus as badly as he said he did then he'll have to cope Janis: Nah Janis: don't reckon it was about her Janis: All about the lifestyle Janis: like a small dog in a designer handbag, init Grace: How rude Grace: I hope you're wrong Grace: Poor baby Janis: Meh, she'll be looked after Janis: Jay's better without her Ma Grace: But Demi isn't as bad as that, is he? Grace: For real like Janis: I don't know Janis: Never really talked to him tbh Janis: He's annoying Grace: He is A LOT Grace: And that's from me Janis: 😂 Janis: Such a good match with Junie, like Janis: fuck's sake, boy Grace: Opposites might attract but they never stick Grace: Has he never read a magazine, god Grace: Obvs not Janis: Cosmo ain't really his speed, babe Janis: Shoulda clued him in Grace: Yeah right! I didn't want to tell you all of this in case you didn't believe, imagine the vibe if I tried to school him on his love life Grace: And with my past boyfriends Grace: ugh Janis: Fair, and if I showed up and heard a screaming brat, I'd be straight back out the door, like Janis: Yeah, but he's even more clueless than you, like 😜 Grace: Liar, you love being a sister-in-law to your bae's sibs Grace: And she's such a cutie 😍 Grace: Excuse you! You better mean I've got the film aesthetic down, bitch Grace: I'm woke Janis: They don't cry, much Janis: and can both wipe their own arses Janis: I can deal with that, like Janis: Sure, sure 😂 just saying, did he need such a rude awakening? couldn't just realise he weren't the one before dragging a kid into it Grace: Where's the lie, girl? Grace: Had that scare myself though, so can't shade too hard Grace: Even though I am 😈 Janis: Boys Janis: So clueless, so stupid Janis: Not that Rio comes out looking much better but Janis: Hopefully we can get out of this without having to involve the law or the social 🤞 lads Grace: Literally! I'm not trying to go on a chatshow with this weave Grace: Trackies are more your vibe Janis: Gonna ask why, but now I get it Janis: Scared I'll snatch it live on air Grace: That or kick off and kick out at me in last season's nike air Grace: So shaming babe Janis: Fuck off 😂 Janis: whatever I'm wearing cost twice as much as your overpriced topshop garbage Grace: Hence I'm not showing myself up like on air Grace: Catch me in labels or leave me out Janis: Unless you wanna fuck Nance Janis: the rich cousins are claimed Grace: EWW Grace: There are enough websites advertising sugar daddies if I can't pay my own bills Grace: no need to go gay or keep it in the family thanks Janis: I dunna, sounds like you wanna fill Ri's stripper shoes to me Janis: Take her place 'til she works of the baby weight Janis: No one would notice Grace: Girl you better stop! I don't have the body for that Grace: Even with baby weight she'd earn more in tips like Janis: Yeah, you're so butterz like Janis: its alright, pixels hide many sins Janis: and they've gotta be at least a little short-sighted with all the wanking they do Grace: OMG shut up Grace: So gross Grace: Like I haven't had enough online drama to fill a life Janis: I mean, was thinking it was quite the #brand switch-up but Janis: gotta get that viewer engagement baby Grace: 🙄 Janis: Please tell me Rio's gonna change its name tho Grace: What would she even choose tho? Grace: it's not that bad Grace: Heard more cringey ones Janis: Its awful Janis: Full on stripper name Janis: least give the kid a choice about it, like, eurgh Grace: What are you gonna name all your barista boy babies? I'm dying to know Grace: And judge Janis: Please Janis: I told you, not happening, so I ain't thought about it, have I? 🙄 Grace: 😂 Grace: You so have Janis: Bitch no Janis: You were always in to knocking poor Barbie and co up Janis: not me, bitch shoulda kept living lavish Grace: You can do both Grace: Get with the times, babes Janis: Bullshit Janis: That's a lie yummy mummy's say to feel better about the fakeness of their labels, trust Grace: Mum did okay, hardly living in a cardboard palace, are we? Grace: And she had loads, I'm not thinking you'll go that hard Janis: Imagine how mint you'd have it as an only child though Janis: or if she had none Grace: Believe me I have Janis: Unlucky Janis: even if you were riding solo you're still #7 Grace: Lucky 7 😇 Janis: If that makes you feel better, babe 😂 Grace: How soon do you think we're gonna all have to roll out and see the baby? Grace: It's gonna be soooooooooooo awkward Janis: Hopefully we'll just smooth over it like we do everything, eh Grace: Gonna have to take back all my yay gay & I love my two daddies gifts Janis: Good Janis: Vom inducing much Grace: Demi would've gushed and you know it Janis: Didn't take much Janis: #loose Grace: You're so savage about him Grace: You didn't even know him you said Janis: He was a prick, didn't need to look hard, or listen, to see it Grace: 🙄 Janis: If he was a top bloke Janis: Wouldn't have made Junie have a kid with him Grace: But you didn't know that's what he was doing, don't lie that hard, babe Janis: Yeah, I ain't saying that Janis: He's just an annoying cunt, standard Janis: but now we see the whole truth of it Grace: That boiling hot tea Janis: Just glad its another one off the Christmas card list Grace: Ugh true, can't treat myself and all of you Grace: Poor Junior though, his birthday is trash now Janis: Dunna why you bother, we're still young enough to not get side eye over it Janis: I got it fuck all, like Janis: Yeah, bad timing, worse luck forreal Grace: He should be loving life with uni over Grace: So tragic Grace: 💔 Janis: Is he ever loving life Janis: Let's be real Grace: Ouch Grace: You've got a point though Janis: The facade is gone now though Janis: He'll have to deal with his shit like the rest of us Grace: mhm Grace: 👏 Janis: This fucking family Grace: Your bf has it worse tho, his dad is a proper headcase, right? Janis: Yeah, he's a right cunt Grace: Seems like it from the little one's vibe Grace: He doesn't like you still either, how rude Grace: never gonna let you 💍 in Janis: Yeah, you know your a right tosser when even kids don't fuck with you Janis: Idc, I'm unlikeable Grace: 😂 Thanks for letting me off saying it Grace: You lovebirds need your own place Janis: 🖕 Janis: Working on it Janis: May as well wait to see where we go for college tho Grace: Yeah Grace: If he gonna do photography? He's really gifted at the snaps Janis: Yeah Grace: Make sure he doesn't forget my clout Grace: Or willingness as a subject Janis: 😏 Janis: how could he forget Grace: SHUT UP Grace: you know what I'm saying, bitch! Janis: 👌 Janis: got it, calling all men in need of muses, like Grace: 🙄 Grace: You doing a night walk with your dog squad later? Janis: Yeah, why, you scouting for 🐶 talent? Grace: I'm just asking if I can come with or is 3 humans a crowd 💘 Grace: The gym was such a non-event today 😭 Janis: You can come with Janis: No doubt Jim will think I'm bullshitting so you can fill him in on this ridiculousness Grace: yay Grace: he might not believe this face either even though it's one of a 😇 obvs Janis: Overcome with a pressing need to take your photo, we get it, bitch 😜 Grace: 😂 Grace: Not hard to compete with your resting bitch face, babes Janis: Please Grace: And I don't need to hear how much he loves your O face before you go there, thanks Grace: TMI with the 🏩 antics Janis: You're the one who brought it up, babe Janis: 🤷 kinda sounds like you want the goss Grace: Please Grace: I just know how nasty you are Janis: Now you just sound jealous 😂 Grace: I said I love being single not that I love not getting any Grace: Excuse me Janis: 😬🤢 Janis: definitely did NOT ask Janis: gross Grace: You can cope Janis: Hmm Janis: Barely Grace: Pablo's literally tripped over you and your boy sooo many times Grace: but I'm the gross one, okay sure Janis: Maybe he's the gross one then Janis: Clearly doing it on purpose, weirdo Grace: Or maybe you are Grace: Exhibitionist Janis: Yeah, well want you lot to see Janis: Nutter 🙄 Janis: all up in my business 24/7 you gon' see some things Grace: 🙄