#listening to them brag about how it was gonna be the hit of the year/(summer?) actually feeds my soul

[shiegra]

showing KennieJD's The Idol roast/recap to a friend and reliving all that hot garbage to distract me from the more serious business hot garbage of reality. feels like almost the one time the internet did the right thing and didn't hatewatch a thing into success en masse

[candycandy00]

Love + Potion - A Yami x Reader Fanfic

You work at a bar Yami frequents and so you’re nearby when he decides to try a potion that turns him into a werewolf for 24 hours. It also happens to make him extremely horny. 

Smut. 18+. Fem Reader. Yami becomes a werewolf. Oral sex. Regular sex. Size kink.

Dividers by @animatedglittergraphics-n-more and @drizztdohurtin.

“Another.”

You look up from the bar, where you’ve been wiping up spilled beer. A few seats down sits your favorite customer, Captain Yami of the Black Bulls. 

He comes to this tavern often, a few times a week unless he’s off on a particularly lengthy mission. When you began working here a year ago, you found him intimidating. He’s huge, he’s gruff, and his squad is rumored to include all sorts of ruffians and even criminals! But you quickly learned that Captain Yami is nothing like you expected. 

He’s never made trouble for you. He’s respectful even if his tone can be impolite. When he spills his drink, he actually cleans it up himself! He’s broken up several fights before they could damage the bar, and on the rare occasion he gets involved in a scuffle, he takes it outside to avoid causing problems. 

One night a drunk customer got irate and threw a glass at you. Yami caught it in midair before it could hit you. Another customer tried to get handsy with you, and Yami literally dragged the man out and tossed him on the street. Some nights, when he stays until closing time, he even walks you home.

You’ve never seen Yami dead drunk. Tipsy, yes. But actually drunk off his ass? Never. No matter how much he drinks. It must be a stamina thing, because it’s obvious that Yami has stamina for days. 

Sometimes you catch yourself wondering if he has that much stamina in the bedroom. 

Yami is an attractive man. It’s well known in the kingdom that several women have their eyes on him, but so far he seems oblivious to their interest. You know you have no shot with him if the powerful beauties around him haven’t been able to bag him. But still, it’s fun to entertain silly fantasies. 

Tonight, he’s laughing and enjoying himself as he talks with another patron, a potion maker who often boasts about the strange, magical concoctions he’s created. This time it’s a potion that turns a person into a werewolf for twenty-four hours. 

Yami doesn’t believe him. No one ever does. The man has bragged about lots of different potions but has never let anyone try them. 

“I’m telling you, it really works!” the man is saying. 

Yami claps him on the back as he takes another drink. “Sure, pal! Whatever you say!”

The man’s face reddens. “Fine! If you’re so sure it won’t work, why don’t you try it?”

Yami pauses, sitting down his drink and looking at the man. “You have it with you?”

The man nods, digging around in his leather bag and producing a clear glass bottle with an amber colored liquid inside. “Here it is! Drink it and apologize for doubting me!”

Yami picks up the bottle and examines the liquid. “You say it only lasts one day?”

“Yes! One full day! Then it wears off and you go back to normal.”

“What are the effects?” Yami asks, seeming more sober and focused now that he’s considering trying it. 

The potion maker straightens in his seat. “You’ll turn into a half man, half wolf. Your teeth with get sharper and your senses will be improved. You’ll probably crave some meat.”

“That doesn’t sound bad,” Yami says. Oh no. Is he actually going to try it? You think it’s a terrible idea, but it’s none of your business, so you keep quiet and listen. 

“Oh, and you might have the sudden desire to mate,” the man adds. 

You freeze, the rag going limp and still in your hand. Yami… wanting to mate? You glance over at him, curious about his reaction to that comment. 

“Will I still have control over myself?” he asks. “I’m not gonna hurt anyone, am I?”

The potion maker laughs. “Oh, of course! You’ll have complete control. It doesn’t affect your mind. Just your senses and instincts.”

Yami finishes off his drink then picks up the potion. He pulls out the wooden stopper and smells the liquid, then shrugs. “Bottom’s up.”

As you watch, Yami downs the amber liquid in one big gulp, then sits the empty bottle on the bar and wipes his mouth. “Tastes like shit,” he says, and starts to offer another comment before he suddenly groans and holds his stomach. 

You step closer. “Captain? Are you alright?”

He looks up at you and forces a grin, even though he appears to be in pain. “I’m fine. Just need… to go to the… restroom.”

Yami stands up and staggers toward the back. You’ve seen him hurry to the bathroom before, but not like this. He’s stumbling over chairs, crashing through the place like a literal bull. 

The door to the restroom slams shut, and the whole bar falls silent. Many of the other customers heard the conversation, and you see them whispering to those that seem confused. Before long, everyone in the bar is waiting to see the results of the potion. 

You hear Yami grunting and groaning from your spot behind the bar. Then he screams out in what sounds like pain. The scream morphs midway into an ear splitting howl, and a chill runs down your spine. What’s happened to your beloved customer?!

The door to the bathroom swings open, and Yami walks out. Under the lights of the bar, you can see the changes clearly. He’s a little taller, his hair a little longer, and there seems to be a thin coat of fine dark fur all over his exposed arms. His eyes are keener, taking on a blood red color with strangely shaped pupils. When he opens his mouth, you can see that his teeth are all razor sharp. 

A few people hoot and hollar, clapping and cheering. Yami grins at them. 

“How does it feel, Captain?” someone shouts. 

“It felt like hell for a minute there,” he says, and the crowd laughs. “But now? It feels pretty damn good!”

He makes his way back toward the bar, answering a few questions along the way and even letting a curious lady touch the fur of his arm. When he takes his usual seat, he looks at you and says, “Give me whatever you serve that has meat in it.”

“R-right away, Captain,” you say, flustered by the intensity of those red eyes. You serve him a pork roast sandwich, then watch as he devours it in seconds. 

“Are you really alright?” you ask him. 

His eyes shift to your face again, then slide down. He’s never looked at you this way before, not even once, but now his gaze seems to be lingering on your chest. 

“I’m good,” he says, eyes moving back to your face. 

The night wears on, with Yami drinking and ordering more meat dishes. He seems to be in good spirits, and even buys the potion maker a drink, an apology for doubting his work. 

The guests begin to thin out, and by midnight, only Yami and the potion maker remain. 

“It will wear off tomorrow, right?” Yami asks. 

The potion maker puffs out his chest. “Of course it will! My potions are perfect!”

With that, the man leaves, and Yami is the last person at the bar. Even the other employees have gone, leaving you to lock up the place. 

Yami glances at the clock on the wall. “About closing time, huh?”

You’re sweeping the floor, moving chairs as you go along. “As soon as I finish cleaning up,” you say. All night you’ve been feeling his eyes on you, seeming to track your every move. 

He leans over onto the bar. “I’m not lookin’ forward to going home. My squad’s gonna have a lot to say about this.”

You don’t look up from the floor. You’re afraid he’ll notice how flushed your face is. “Oh really?”

“I know a couple who are gonna freak out and call me reckless. At least one will want to fight me in this form. And a few will probably wanna pet me,” he adds with a laugh. 

Without thinking, you say, “Well your fur does look very soft, Captain.”

Oh no. Did you just say that? Out loud? You keep your back turned to him as you lower your head. 

“Wanna touch it?” 

You freeze at the sound of his voice. Slowly, your turn to look at him. Your eyes meet his, and they look… hungry. 

“Are you sure you don’t mind?” you ask, stepping closer. 

He holds out one arm toward you. “I’m sure.”

Hesitantly, you reach out and touch his arm, your fingertips brushing over the fur there. It feels like velvet, and soon your whole hand is rubbing his arm, from his shoulder to his wrist. You can feel the taut muscles beneath the silky fur, and you feel something within you tighten. 

“So?” he asks. “How is it?”

His eyes are locked on yours again. You swallow and say, “It’s as soft as it looks, Captain.”

“Yami. Call me Yami.”

Your hand is still on his arm. “Yami,” you repeat, feeling heat creep across your face. 

A moment passes between you, then you withdraw your hand. “If you really don’t want your squad to see you, just stay here tonight. There’s no bed but there’s a bench in the back.”

“You wouldn’t get in trouble, would you?” 

You smile. “I don’t think the owner would mind. It’d be like having the best security guard in the world for free.”

“Thanks,” he says. “I think I’ll do that.”

You take your time finishing up the cleaning, suddenly being in no hurry to leave. When you’re finally done, you walk back over to the bar. “The bench is in the back. I’ll show you before I leave.”

He looks at you, that same hunger in his eyes. “You’re not staying? I might get lonely.”

“Uh, well… I…”

He breaks eye contact and looks away. “Sorry. I don’t know what I’m sayin’. This damn potion is makin’ me act weird.”

“I don’t mind!” you blurt out, then instantly regret your honesty when he looks at you again. “I mean… I don’t mind staying here tonight and keeping you company,” you add, hoping he doesn’t pick up on your embarrassment. 

“Are you sure? You’re probably tired from workin’ all night.”

Ahh, his eyes are so intense right now. His voice is even deeper than usual. And you’re standing so close to him, you can feel his body heat. 

You can feel something else too. A growing wetness between your legs. 

“I’m positive,” you say. “How about another drink? Or another sandwich?” 

You start to step away, but his big hand catches your wrist. It’s a gentle grip, but it stops you in your tracks. He leans closer to you, and… sniffs? 

“You smell good,” he says. Then his eyes widen slightly, as if he’s just realizing something. He focuses on your face. “Are you…?” Then his eyes trail down your body, pausing below your waist. 

Wait, can he smell your arousal? When his eyes move back to yours, you know it’s true. The unfinished question lingers in the air between you, and his hand is still holding your wrist. You stare at him for a moment, mentally debating what you should do. You’ll probably never get another chance like this, to be alone with a horny Yami. How many women in the kingdom would give anything for an opportunity like this? 

So you decide to throw caution to the wind and go for it. You lean closer, locked in his gaze, and ever so slowly kiss his parted lips. He doesn’t pull away, which is a good sign. When you part from him, he says nothing at first, only lifts his cigarette to his mouth and takes a drag before putting it out in the nearby ashtray. After exhaling the smoke, he quickly pulls you closer and kisses you back. 

This kiss is different from the one you gave him. This is all heat and tongue and his free hand sliding into your hair. His fingers are tipped with sharp claws, but he’s being careful not to scratch you. 

You lean into him, your hands pawing at his thin white shirt, trying to drag it up. You’ve wanted to see him shirtless for as long as you’ve known him, and now you can’t get it off fast enough. 

He breaks the kiss long enough to slip the shirt over his head and drop it to the floor. His muscular chest is also coated in a thin layer of that velvety fur. It becomes thinner as it goes down his torso, becoming almost invisible by the time it hits his waist, save for a thicker, narrow patch trailing from his navel down to beneath his belt. Does it go all the way down? You can’t wait to find out. 

His hands move to the front of your dress, untying the laces of your simple corset. With it loosened, the fabric of the dress beneath it slips down, your breasts spilling out. Yami wastes no time squeezing one while his head dips down to take the other into his mouth, his lips sucking the tender nipple. 

You sigh in pleasure, one hand on his head, fingers raking through his hair. His touch is hot, burning with a desire you never thought you’d feel from him. One of his arms circles around your waist, holding you close, and you can smell a strong, woodsy musk. Yami’s scent. It’s intoxicating. 

He stands up from the stool and lifts you onto the bar so that you’re sitting on the edge, facing him, legs dangling. He pushes your dress up to your waist, then slides your modest white panties down, under your ass, and off your ankles. With them discarded, he parts your legs, and leans his face in. 

Yami devours your pussy the way he devoured the pork roast sandwiches, like he was starving, ravenous. His big, warm hands are on your thighs, holding them apart while his tongue laps at your dripping cunt. And when his lips wrap around your throbbing clit, you gasp and shudder, your hands flying to his shoulders to have something to grip. 

“Captain…” you moan out, then, in an even more breathless tone, “Y-Yami!”

It feels so good, you think you might simply dissolve into a pool of goo. He’s always seemed somewhat indifferent to women, so you assumed he wasn’t one of those playboys with tons of experience. But this is clearly not a man who has never pleasured a woman before. He’s too good at this, his tongue pressing into the exact spots that have your whole body jerking. 

When you cum, your thighs quivering in his grip, you find yourself squirting for the first time in your life. The intensity of the orgasm has you panting as Yami licks up every drop. 

You barely catch your breath before you notice Yami unbuckling his belt and opening his pants. You stare in anticipation as he pulls out a monstrously huge erection, leaking from the tip and seeming to twitch in his hand. You’re already drenched, slick with your fluids and Yami’s saliva, but taking his cock is going to be a challenge. 

Is it so big because he’s a werewolf now? Or is it always like this? Either way, you spread your legs even wider and lean back on your elbows, looking up at him expectantly. 

He grins at you. “Think you can take it?”

You smile back at him. “If not, I’ll surpass my limits,” you say, using the phrase he was famous for in the kingdom. 

He laughs heartily, then leans over you. “Ready?”

You nod, your heart racing with excitement. With his improved senses, he can probably hear it. He definitely hears your breath catching as he begins sliding his cock inside you. 

He goes slowly, carefully, giving your body time to stretch and accommodate him. You feel so full already and he’s only halfway in, but you weren’t kidding about surpassing your limits. You want him all the way inside you. 

Your legs wrap around him, pulling him closer, you slick pussy drawing him further in. God, he’s so big, so warm, you want to stay like this forever. He grunts as he finally bottoms out, his tip smushed against your cervix in a satisfying way. 

For a moment, he doesn’t move, as if he just wants to enjoy the feeling of being fully sheathed inside you, of your soft, slippery warmth wrapped around him. 

Then, he begins lightly thrusting into you, watching your face for your reaction. When you cry out in pleasure, reaching up and throwing your arms around his neck, his thrusts become deeper, harder. 

You can feel his fine fur rubbing against your bare chest, and it drives you wild. You bury your face in his neck, whimpering his name as he pounds into you, your body nearly lifting from the bar with each thrust. 

He’s breathing hard, a sheen of sweat on the parts of his skin not covered in fur, intensifying his scent. You want it to seep into your skin and mark you forever as his. His toned abdomen, with its trail of soft hair, is rubbing your body, creating the friction you crave, making your breaths come shuddering and rapid. 

With a loud cry, you climax again. Your entire body, from your arms to your legs to your silky pussy, clenches him tightly. He fucks you through it, his own muscles seeming to spasm as he suddenly groans and plunges in deep. He stays that way, absolutely buried inside you as he cums, shooting his entire hot load directly into your core. 

For several moments, the two of you remain tangled together. Then you slowly separate. He helps you down from the bar and you stand on shaky legs, not moving until you feel steady. 

Quietly, the two of you clean up, and you pour Yami another drink. 

“I hope I’m still welcome here tomorrow night,” he says, seeming just a little awkward as he lights another cigarette. 

“Of course you are!” you tell him. “You’re my favorite customer!”

He looks at you and smiles. “Oh? That’s funny. I come here all the time because you’re my favorite bartender!”

You laugh at that remark, thinking you’ll have to thank the potion maker the next time you see him. His werewolf potion may as well have been a love potion! 

[yandere-kokeshi]

Yandere MW2 + König with male darling who's like corpse husband

Warnings: yandere behavior, slight sexual hints, and talks about suicidal thoughts.

A/N: for anyone confused by the title, this headcanon bases y/n having a deep voice, always wears a mask and is pretty dark; humor and clothing wise.

Hope you enjoy :]

Johnny “Soap” MacTavish:

Loves to hear you talk. Whatever you wanna talk about, even if it’s something he doesn’t know or understand, he’ll stare at you with his hands under his chin while nodding along.

Is completely baffled when he hears it in the mornings. Whenever you suddenly appear, scaring the crap out of him, Soap stares at you before smiling: “Shite. How can you just hit puberty twice? is that even possible?”

Will offer to make you hot drinks that help with your voice. He read a bunch of articles, which, makes him learn that your voice gets irritated towards the end of the day. If you want, he'd love for massage your throat for you ;]

Loves your style, especially with your rings and necklaces; he may or may not pull at your necklace to kiss you sweetly.

With you wearing a mask, he respects your decision - going as far as to rub into people’s faces that he got to see yours. Definitely pulls it down to kiss you when you two are alone.

Asks you to impersonate Ghost. And if you do, he brags to Simon and the team about you.

The jokes are horrible but laughable with him. While he does have Ghost by his side, hearing him tell those awful jokes, he can't help but think yours is a bit better; his

—

Captain “Price” John:

A sucker for it. Whenever he hears you talk, especially in the mornings, his eyes bulge out of his head, getting the weird sensation that you get when listening to asmr; a smirk slithers itself onto his face as he asks what you want for breakfast.

“Good grief. I've never realized how deep ya’ voice gets.”

Will call you grumpy pants whenever you get up with a deeper voice than normal and tend to snap at him. At this point, it's a name both of you smile at whenever he calls you.

Loves your alternative style. Not only is it the opposite of him. But he finds it unique to see the chains or pins you've collected over the years to wear. Price may pull you into him with your belt loops, using them to tease you whenever you're acting a brat.

Your humor is fine with him — but he doesn’t appreciate down bad or messed up ones; while he’s used to Simon’s ones, yours is sometimes on a different level. He won’t tell you or ask you to stop, Price may suspect something is up which leads to the two of you having talks about dark topics and some trauma-related issues.

—

Kyle “Gaz” Garrick:

He’s fascinated by your voice and finds it incredibly hot; always surprised whenever he hears it. Never knew it could get deeper in the mornings, but he isn’t complaining.

“Why - how is your voice so deep? You're gonna scare the hell outta me someday.”

At first, when he heard your voice, he thought you had a condition that causes your voice to be deep. But depending on your position, he just realizes it's a part of you and Gaz loves you for you.

With your jokes, Gaz looks out for you; seeing that, if any sign of suicidal thoughts come foward, he'll know. But often laughs or seemingly looks at you weirdly before chuckling.

Is pretty nice about reminding you to sip on hot drinks so your throat isn’t as irritated; he sometimes sees it as a sore throat.

Your outfits are really neat to him. Not only does he enjoy seeing you dress up, but he loves seeing your rings and spikey clothing. While it's not his type of wardrobe, he feels pretty confident around you.

—

Simon “Ghost” Riley:

A definite sucker for your voice. Whenever you walk in and start talking, a sly smirk crawls onto his face before turning towards you for his full attention.

“Fuckin’ hell. Did not expect your voice to be that deep. Nice tone to it.”

Simon has a good smile whenever he sees people staring at you, especially if you are introducing yourself. Though, if anyone dares to say anything negative, they'll get a stare-down with him.

A good reminder of who will carry cough drops for you. He’s incredibly helpful whenever your voice gets irritated, especially during the day. Simon is more than willing to make you a cup of tea to help you relax.

Your outfits are incredibly hot to him. He looks holding your hands, occasionally messing with your rings, and uses the advantage for intimate events in bed.

With Simon having a whole patch of dark humor, he enjoys hearing yours, especially if it’s horrible. However, he will watch out and pay attention if he hears self-deprecating jokes that are too far or something he doesn’t agree with, Ghost will ask if you’re alright; making sure you are okay mentally, casually reminding you that he’s here to talk to.

Is pretty sweet when he wants attention which means that when it’s ready for bed, he’ll lay on your stomach, letting you play with his hair while he makes you talk to him; something about your voice is pretty captivating, and he loves falling asleep to it.

—

König:

Much like Gaz, whenever he hears it, he feels warm and starts to stutter. An obvious blush formed on his face. Sometimes, he can’t help but get all blushy whenever he hears you.

“Alter Schwede! You scared me. Did you sleep well? Does your throat hurt?”

He worries a lot. Especially with the complications of your voice going raspy and your throat hurting after a long day (or night). This said, he'll often make you warm drinks and always carry cough drops in his pockets when he leaves with you.

May be stupid but König calls you his Raven/or Crow. He thinks it fits you well and with your deep voice.

Your outfits intrigue him. Whenever he sees you getting ready, putting on your Gothic clothes and thick mask, he smiles in astonishment; how are you so handsome?

Being in public, a tall man and another having a deep ass voice, it's expected to get attention. Whenever people pay attention to you, König may feel a bit jealous but he doesn't like when people reference you to certain things.

A huge man who becomes a puppy the minute you start talking to him, especially at night. He loves hearing you talk about anything, whether that's about work, your childhood, or how you bonged your head leaving the home twice; he'll listen to you and laugh.

—

Masterlist || Please reblog or comment instead of liking, it helps me a bunch!

© yandere-kokeshi 2023 — Do not copy, modify, edit, repost, or use my works for ASMR readings, tiktoks, or other content.

[moonshynecybin]

what would you consider essential marc and rosquez watching? i don’t mean races but the stuff happening around it, there seems to be so much and idk where to start 😭

BIG ass question. i think it depends what you want outta this and how you best interact with content slash consume information. for me (not to brag but. winner of multiple historical essay writing competitions in high school. for context on the kind of freak i am bringing to the table here.) the research is kind of the fun part ! like i just started googling shit! i would go to inactive blogs and just search 'marquez' on them to see what would happen ! a lot of the times that works ! but it also takes a lotttt of time lol so i'll chuck some good resources your way, why not...

okay im not sure how basic we're talkin here but um. background. so the documentaries are, i think. the best place to start. theyre entertaining and offer a good amalgamation of clips to provide context for the actual racing. and like i know you de-emphasized racing (which is fine lol who cares) but it really is like the most important thing in the world to these fools and its a pretty visual sport so i think its at least helpful. like yes sepang IS about the press conference, but its also about the conversation they have ON the race track using their motorcycles. which is also somewhat a conversation that they HAVE been having all year long...

i'd start with hitting the apex (2013), its a GREAT introduction to the "characters" that does a lot of legwork to contextualize everything. lays the scene for where vale is at coming into his relationship with marc (both personally, wrt to marco simoncelli, and career-wise concerning his flop at ducati), and also how insane marc's whole deal is in general. the second half is. materially a study on what him entering the premiere class did to the sport as a whole. the introductory chapter in many respects

marc marquez: all in. MY introduction and blissfully free online. marc comma in his own words, with all the implications of that. a self-produced documentary where he is giving feedback about the edit of said documentary straight to camera and no less vulnerable because of it which is very marc imo. revealing both intentionally AND unintentionally about his whole deal with injury, vale, and his image.

motogp unlimited. im gonna be real kind of boring. like i would still watch it ! but do it kind of later, once you know the major players so youre automatically more invested. it doesnt really give you more than marc says himself in all in tbh, and i get the sense him and vale were NAWWWT interested in doing more than the bare minimum for it.

marc's rookie doc. free and subtitled on the youtubes. the first half of this is deadass just him wanting to fuck vale so bad while every comment from vale has me saying GIRL. out loud because the foreshadowing would be genuinely shocking if this was fiction. anyways the laguna seca of it all....

next i would hit up PODCASTS ! i think it makes sense after the documentaries, because these are all podcasts that arent strictly about rosquez (even if they are in many ways the main characters lmao) and personally it helps to put faces to lesser known names that might pop up before i listen to a purely audio product and get lost in the soup of sounds. the paddock pass podcast has two retrospective episodes about the 2015 season that are really good at context, oxley bom pod has a fun recent episode on valentino that i love, again just poke around a lil

videos. these guys have never filmed a lot of content together tragically. what i wouldnt give for someone to make them do an escape room. anyways ranch visit HERE (post explaining the ranch visit here). sepang presscon (sowwy) here. vale unhinged podcast interview the month after marc's documentary came out here. vale retirement interview where he gets asked about marc here. vale talking about asking marc to the ranch here. vale postrace at argentina 2018 here. UCCIO postrace at argentina 2018 here. theres a lot moreeeee just go on my blog archive and filter for rosquez and vids its easier lol

journalism. hello. okay so you should genuinely spend some time reading through mat oxley's stuff he can write (theres a paywall but you can run that shit through wayback machine). he also loves an insane comparison which i do enjoy.... again this is one that can be solved by googling his name and tacking on 'marquez' or 'rossi' or a specific time period or race it will probably reap some dividends. in terms of specific ass articles this one is kind of load bearing in terms of sepang and some of the interpersonal competitive tensions at play. that being said there are manyyyyyy crazy interviews and snippents of articles from other journos floating around motogp tumblr (like literally too many to link) adn its fun to dig around to find them, but mat oxley gets a shoutout because i was reading this article TODAY !

other content. honestly one of the best resources I'VE found for plotting out the arc of their relationship is @kingofthering's everyrosquezpodium series. you can REALLY see it play out lol. also her tagging system rules she very neatly lays out years and races... so if something jumps out at you, CLICK ITTTT ! also all of @ricciardoes fave presscon moments series. insane.

all this to say a small little rpf fandom like this rewards some digging! i would just recommend following narrative threads that interest you ! its also a small fanbase that is pretty research oriented, so if youre ever confused about somethin, just shoot an ask or run a search on someone's blog (@kwisatzworld has endless vale resources and @batsplat is one of the most thorough researchers ive ever seen, for example) like for real theres so much... i also have a primer that i made forever ago that has some links on it so you can peruse that if you so wish. but frankly a lot of it is just using those research muscles and being sufficiently deranged enough to be screenshotting reddit threads at one am so you can post them to tumblr because they mentioned marc and vale in the same sentence and that lit up some of the neurons in your brain

(and i know you said outside of races but i think theyre good benchmarks as turning points soooo you should do some diggin on laguna seca 2013, jerez 2015, argentina 2015, ASSEN 2015, sepang 2015 obvi, argentina 2018, and misano 2019. those are the big tentpoles of insane rosquez relationship drama imo. i mean theres many more but. im limiting myself.)

[billthedrake]

DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH (PART TWO)

"Moooose!" It was TJ Miller's teammate and good buddy Trey jogging up beside him as the team made their way in from football practice. TJ was an offensive lineman and Trey was a kicker, so they often spent practice doing different drills.

"T-Man," TJ said with a gruff smile. "What's up? Your golden foot gonna win the game for us this weekend?"

"We'll see," Trey grinned. "Listen, what you doing for your birthday?" It was TJ's 18th.

"My dad's taking me out tonight. Steak dinner, the whole works," the 6'5" jock answered. TJ had hit another growth spurt the last year, and while he wasn't overweight, he was genetically stocky in build, the teen muscle looking even fuller and bigger. If he didn't hate school so much, he'd be college scholarship material for sure.

"Nice," his friend answered. "Maybe we can get a few of the guys together this weekend and do something. Kevin's parents have that place up at the lake, and he's always going on about us going up there."

"That'd be cool," TJ said. He always felt self-conscious around Kevin Reynolds, the team quarterback and golden boy. Kevin's family was loaded. He wasn't exactly an asshole about it, but the quarterback was always was bragging about some gift or vacation or something.

TJ's dad was strictly blue collar, though Mark Miller had worked hard and now was the owner of a successful welding business on the outskirts of their small town. It had been a rocky upbringing for TJ, since his mom had gotten into drugs and left them by the time TJ was 5. She was living a state over now and was doing better, mostly out of rehab, and TJ saw her once a year at the holidays. But it was mostly just him and Pop... and the rotating cast of girlfriends who'd show up around the house.

TJ had to laugh at how predictable his dad's type was... blond (real or fake), big tits, ten years or so younger than him, kind of a cross between sorority girl, metal-band groupie, and biker chick. Somewhat whorish, to be crude. Mark Miller wasn't magazine handsome by any means, but he had blue eyes and youthful dimples and a sexual magnetism that seemed to win women over. At least the women he went for. But they never stuck around long... one or two months, maybe, or if he was real into them, eight or nine. Then it was another woman showing up at the house.

TJ knew the town looked down on his dad for his bachelor ways. He also knew his Dad didn't give a fuck. That's one reason he looked up to his old man, for all of the ways Pop annoyed him sometimes. And deep down, the jock suspected his dad wasn't going to commit to a relationship while TJ was still around. For as unconventional a father as Mark Miller was, he was a good dad and thought the world of his son.

****

The steak dinner was great, but even more so TJ was starved from a tough practice, and his Dad ribbed him for scarfing his food.

"Sorry, Pop," the now 18 year old said deferentially.

Mark flashed those dimples on his otherwise tan, weathered face. "Just teasing ya, Thomas," he said. Mark always called him by his full first name, not TJ, not Moose. "Eat up. That's why I brought you here."

TJ craved times like this. When Pop was in a good mood. When there wasn't one of the man's girlfriends around. As they finished up, Mark seemed to be smirking as he watched TJ.

"What?" the football jock laughed.

Mark smiled. "You're all fucking grown up. That's what."

"I guess," TJ replied.

Mark leaned in. "So... it's been a while for our father-son chats... you still a virgin, son?"

TJ blushed. "Dad! What the fuck?"

Mark didn't relent. "What? It's just us, man to man, Thomas. You're 18 and about to graduate. I wanna make sure my boy is enjoying life a little."

TJ knew why his Dad hounded him. Mark Miller was the kind of dude who lost his virginity at 15 and fucked his way through half the cheerleading squad, and loved to brag about it. To Mark it seemed only natural TJ would be the same way.

"I, dunno, Pop... I guess I'm not good around girls." TJ hated lying to his father, but it wasn't a total lie. For all of his success playing football, at heart TJ was an awkward kid and his recent growth had made him a bull-in-the-china shop socially.

Mark nudged his son's cheek playfully with his fist then lean back with a proud smile. The man definitely had something up his sleeve. "That doesn't matter where we're going tonight."

TJ didn't understand. "Whaddya mean?"

"I figured I'd get you a special birthday present... there's a hooker I've used who's a real pro... I mean like anything you wanna try," Mark explained. "Good looking too, not a skank."

"Dad, I dunno..." TJ meekly objected.

"Come on, boy, it'll be a blast. Trust me on this."

Mark was a persuasive man, but more than that TJ was scared of disappointing him. Maybe if he thought of Coach Adams the whole time...

TJ tried to pass it off as first time jitters on the ride across town. He wondered how often his Dad went to prostitutes. He had a feeling it was more than a rare occasion. They got out of the truck and walked up to a nondescript ranch house.

"Hey Mark," a woman answered. Mark had been right. She was pretty... older than TJ expected, but petite and kind of a mom next door.

Mark clapped his hand on TJ's meaty shoulder. "This is my boy Thomas."

"Well hello Thomas, I'm Susie," the hooker smiled in a honeyed voice, not missing a beat.

"I want you to take real good care of him.... anything he's in the mood for..." Mark pulled out a stuffed envelope from his inner coat pocket. "I made the kitty real sweet for ya tonight."

"Well thanks, Sugar," she smiled to TJ's dad. Then turning to the young jock, she took his hand. "Don't be nervous, honey... we'll have a real good time." She practically pulled TJ inside, as his father gave him a pat on the back and sauntered back to wait in his truck.

Susie led TJ back to a bedroom. Nice and clean, not what he expected. Maybe he only had TV prostitutes to go by, but this seemed... normal.

But Susie was slipping off her nightgown and showing off a pair of big round tits. The woman had implants, but they were good ones. She had on some lacy panties but otherwise stood before TJ completely naked.

It was the first time TJ had seen a women nude in the flesh, and as he pulled off his jeans, dutifully determined to go with it, he wished to god the sight turned him on.

"So Thomas... are you the romantic type?"

"Romantic?" TJ asked. This was a hooker.

"I mean," she tried to explain. "Some men, well they want some affection they're not getting elsewhere, or want to pretend I'm a girl they've been pining for. That sort of thing." Seeing TJ's reaction, she smiled. "Maybe you're more a get your rocks off kind of man," she added. "I respect that."

"Yeah," TJ said, dumbly. It was now or never. The jock shucked his boxer briefs and his big soft dong flopped out.

Susie sized him up. "You're definitely your Daddy's boy," she grinned. Stepping up she reached down and cupped TJ's sizable genitals. "Let's see if we can warm these engines up."

TJ gulped. He tried. God knows he tried. He thought of Coach Adams doing what Susie was doing. He thought of the last gay porn video he'd jacked off to. He shut his eyes and thought of how he'd dreamed his first time with a man to go.

"You OK, Honey?" Susie asked, concerned. "I can do something else."

"No," TJ muttered. He reached down and pulled up his briefs and reached for his jeans. "I can't... sorry Susie...."

Already the tears were coming, breaking his voice. Then sobs. The fact this prostitute was seeing him break down somehow made it worse. He couldn't bear to look at her as he rushed out of the house and toward Pop's truck.

"Hey kiddo," Mark enthused, "that was fast..." His words were interrupted when he realized TJ was crying. A face-red, ugly cry. "It's OK," he patted his son's leg. He got out of the car and walked up to the door, where Susie was appearing.

TJ watched as they had a quick conversation. Susie was explaining what had gone on to his father. At least as much as she knew.

The jock feared the worst when his dad opened the truck door and got back in. His crying had stopped, and fear and shame now replaced the distress of the moment.

"You really aren't into women, are you, son?" Mark said, the realization sinking in.

"No, Pop. I'm so fucking sorry..."

Mark gave a stern but loving nod. "Don't say you're sorry, Thomas. Where you get your dick wet is between you and your maker... and hell, it's not even his goddamn business."

It was the best thing a father could have told him. "I should have told you, Pop. I wish I'd had the guts to... save you all that money."

"Don't worry about the money," Mark said. He started the truck. "I guess I can be an intimating SOB, huh?" he said.

"A little," TJ admitted.

Mark laughed, and that TJ felt himself laugh.

As they got back to the house, Mark got that idea up his sleeve grin again. "Time for another man to man talk," he said as he sat on the sofa. TJ took the seat across from him.

"How long you known?"

"Like forever, Pop," TJ admitted. "Since my first fantasies, you know."

Mark nodded. "You on the level about being a virgin? Or was that a cover?"

TJ spoke up. "Oh on the level. I've never... I don't even know how I'd find a guy in this town."

"Not one of your teammates or anything?"

"No sir." TJ wasn't quite sure why Pop was giving him the third degree, especially after what he said earlier.

"Well my offer still stands."

"What offer?" TJ didn't follow.

"A hooker. Or escort, whatever you call it when it's a dude."

"Jesus, Pop... you already forked out enough money tonight."

"Susie didn't charge me, son," he replied. "I gave her a little something for her time and trouble. But this..." he reached in his coat pocket and pulled out that envelope, still stuffed, and tossed it on the coffee table. "should be enough to get you a good time. Whaddya say?"

It was a little messed up, but TJ knew it was his father's way of giving him an important experience. And TJ wasn't gonna lie to himself, he was way eager to have sex for the first time.

With a shy grin, the jock admitted, "If you're offering, I'm not gonna say no, Pop."

Mark's expression got a big wide smile. "You're a Miller all right." He seemed to be thinking it over. "In a couple weeks... we'll go up to Chicago. Make a weekend of it. Catch a Blackhawks game. And you can help me pick out the right dude to hire." He got a sheepish expression. "I'm afraid your old man doesn't know much about the gay stuff."

***

That's how it went down. Pop even closed up shop a couple hours early and was ready to go once TJ got home from school. The first night in the city they caught the hockey game, and Saturday morning they did a little sightseeing.

By early afternoon, TJ's dad seemed in a down, quiet mood.

"Pop... we don't gotta," the jock said. "I don't gotta..."

"It's not that," Mark answered, forcing a smiled. "I guess I'm just realizing you'll probably want to leave Centerville after you graduate."

TJ knew instantly what was on his dad's mind. Other than raising a fine son, Mark Miller was proud of nothing more than his business. He'd built it from the ground up, with hard work. And once he had an idea TJ wasn't college bound, he taught his boy welding and everything he knew about running the business. It was understood TJ would stay on and take it over eventually. The gay thing was throwing a wrench in that plan.

"I'm not going anywhere, Pop. Not anytime soon," he added.

Mark gave an affectionate smile and pulled his big boy close to him for a second as they walked.

They made their way back to the hotel and Mark checked his watch. "It's about time," he said. "I'll give you your privacy, Thomas. But you know where the money is. And call if there's any trouble."

"Thanks, Pop, you're the best," TJ said. He was surprisingly not hesitant about this. Eagerness and teen hormones had taken over. He'd been chubbing off and on all morning in anticipation.

He didn't have to wait long when he got to the room. TJ stripped down, then put on a pair of football short just to be decent. He counted and double counted the cash in the envelope. It was certainly more than what Susie charged. This was the big city, and Pop had sprung for a high-class escort.

TJ didn't know how high class until a knock came at the door and he went to open it. "Steve" was crazy hot. Dressed in form-fitting gym-workout clothes, the prostitute stood 5'11" and solidly built with gym-honed muscled. TJ guess the man was in his late 30s. Handsome in a non-flashy way, Steve looked like he could have been one of those career men who TJ had seen downtown and at the hockey game last night.

"Thomas?" the escort asked with a deep masculine voice and a friendly smile on his face.

"Yeah," the jock grinned. "You can call me TJ."

"Nice to meet you TJ," the escort said, stepping into the hotel room. He was very much a professional and at ease. He set down a gym back and turned to TJ, who stood on and felt his cock stir back to firmness. "You have a nice body, TJ," he said. "You an athlete?"

"Yessir, football," TJ replied. "I used to do some wrestling but got too big." The jock felt dumb because he didn't know how much small talk to give. This guy probably didn't give a shit what sport he did, TJ reckoned.

Steve chuckled. "No need to call me sir... unless that's your thing."

TJ laughed nervously. "I don't know what my thing is, actually... this is my first time."

"First time with a professional?" Steve clarified.

TJ shook his head. God he was nervous now, but it was a different kind of nervous than with Susie. "No. First time, period. I'm a virgin."

"Wow," Steve said. "Well, I'm honored to be your first, TJ." He stepped up, like he was going to initiate a kiss. "I should double check... you're 18 right?"

TJ nodded. "I got an ID if you wanna see."

"That's fine," Steve assured him, then paused. "On second thought, I should."

TJ went over to his wallet and fished out his driver's license. Steve took a look, nodded, and handed it back.

"Um, the money is there," TJ pointed to the envelope by the bed. Steve picked it up and took a quick look inside.

"Thank you," he said. "So, TJ..." he continued as he undid his zip up outer sweatshirt and peeled off his T-shirt. "You just tell me what you want, OK? If it's vanilla, it's good. Top, bottom, sucking, whatever - I do it all. If it's more, just ask. Some things are an easy yes, some are a hard no, and some require negotiating." He stood shirtless and kicked off his shoes. "But mostly I'm here to make you happy, got it?" Then the joggers came down, leaving Steve completely nude.

"Yeah, got it," TJ hissed, so turned on. Steve was porn hot. Scratch that, he had a better body than any porn guy he'd seen. Sculpted muscle that was big without being muscle bound, waxed smooth but with thick pubes and nice leg and arm hair. A heavy long dick hung from the man's crotch. "God, anything is gonna be amazing," the jock added, eyeing Steve up from head to toe.

"You're overdressed, stud," Steve winked.

TJ nodded and pushed his shorts down. This time there was no performance problem. TJ was hard as a rock.

"Oh my fucking god, kid," Steve grunted, unable to take his eyes off TJ's cock. "You're fricking huge."

TJ knew he had a big dick. Even soft he showed bigger than his teammates in the showers. But now he had confirmation of just how much out of the ordinary he was. "Too big?" he asked nervously. God, if this fell through just because he had a big schlong, TJ was gonna be majorly upset.

Steve could barely take his eyes off that prick. "No such thing, stud... wow!"

The fact this hot as hell escort appreciated his endowment made TJ's dick surge harder, almost bouncing up from its heavy standing position.

Finally, the handsome escort looked up into TJ's horny face. "So, stud... this is all about you. Any way you want your special first time to play out," he asked with a grin.

TJ asked, "Um, do you kiss?"

Steve nodded and stepped up to the taller high school senior athlete, placing his hands on TJ's beefy body. Those hands felt incredible to TJ, almost better than the feel of Steve's breath on his face and the connection of another man's lips to his for the first time. Almost. The jock didn't know what to expect from kissing a man. Steve's kiss both matched his expectations and felt different. Real, not fantasy, especially once that tongue darted between his lips and met TJ's urging it to probe back. It did.

TJ's hards were now on this hunk's body, feeling him up and humping against him as he leaned down slightly into that heated kiss.

Steve pulled back, a smile on his face. He gently bumped fists against TJ's broad chest. The footballer wouldn't be mistaken for an older man, but the young dude was solid and muscular beneath that genetic padding. "You're a tall fella," Steve hissed. "Maybe this would be more comfortable on the bed."

"Yeah," TJ agreed. As he stepped toward one of the spare double beds and pulled the covers down, he could make out the trail of precum on Steve's upper abs and smooth sternum. He got on the bed and watched as Steve climbed on slowly, almost seductively, and ran his hands up TJ's legs.

"You feel up for a blow job?" the escort asked.

"God yeah," the jock laughed. "For starters." He looked down at this muscular man, ready to do what he asked. It was the first time that realization fully sank in for TJ. He got a sense of why his Pop loved hookers. "I wanna fuck you, too," he said boldly.

Steve's hands gripped the base of that meaty teen prick and pulled it up to an upright position. Leaning in, he growled, "Don't worry, I'll pull off when you get close. Just give me a heads up, OK?" Servicing a virgin was a first for the male prostitute, but he suspected this young john might not have the best trigger control.

TJ's eyes were wide as he watched Steve take his prick in his mouth and start sucking. Just a few exploratory sucks to wet that dong was all the older man needed before he began actively sucking the cock.

"Shit!" TJ gasped, surprised at how amazing it felt. "Suck me, man." Steve wasn't deep throating his meat, not by a long shot, but TJ didn't expect that. He didn't expect anything in particular really, it all felt great. The tongue, the slick saliva, the suction. And most of all the sight of an older man blowing him, going to town on his cock.

"Oh shit, pull off!" he warned. Too soon, the escort had him at the brink.

Steve let out a chuckle and blew on that twitching hard dick. He flicked the base of the shaft with his fingers, a kind of rough snap. "OK if I do this, stud? It'll help keep you from overheating."

TJ nodded. The sting at the base of his prick almost tickled. But it worked. He was still rock hard, but the danger of orgasm passed.

Steve repeated his sucking now, and this time TJ was able to savor it with less urgency. This guy was good. Hell, that was an understatement. TJ felt a little guilty about how much Pop was shelling out for a half hour with Steve, but the escort was worth what he charged.

Again, the stirring in TJ's balls was a warning sign. His signal to Steve was less urgent, but the sucker got the picture and pulled off. He avoided stimulating the head, but worked his fist up and down the bottom half of the prick.

"You're a stallion and a half all right.... OK if I sit on it first? After I get used to the size you can fuck me in whatever position you want."

TJ's prick twitched at those words, and he watched Steve go over and pull out some special-looking lube from his gym bag. Or maybe it's what gay guys always used for anal. Steve had the look of a man on a mission as he reached back between his buns and applied an extra amount of lube, and some more for good measure, then climbed back on the bed. He straddled TJ's midsection and reached back to slick up that meaty dong.

"This is easily ten inches," he said aloud. "Damn."

TJ never felt prouder. His dick size wasn't his doing, but somehow he felt like a real man with this guy. Particularly watching Steve's face as he sat back on the big pole. It wasn't a wince of pain, but the man definitely reacted to the stretching of his hole. It took about twenty seconds for him to work that head past his ring, then he sank down.

"God yes," Steve grunted, feeling his guts fill up with that heavy jock dong. He got caught up in his own bodily sensations, but then remembered TJ. "How's that feel, kiddo? Your first piece of ass?"

"Amazing," TJ replied, running his hands all along Steve's built outer thighs. He grunted once Steve bottomed out, sitting all the way down on his crotch. "I don't even know to describe it," the jock continued. "It's everything I dreamed about."

Steve's insides felt alive. Somehow the cock felt even thicker and longer inside him. But the initial discomfort was giving way, fast. "I'm glad, stud." He raised up and little, maybe two inches, then eased back down. And again.

"Fuck, that's nice," TJ grunted. It was like a slow handjob but with the tighter suction of Steve's slick bowels doing the massaging.

Steve's focus was now entirely on his newbie john, eyes on TJ's, locked in and trying to read the jock's face. "Want me to work out your load like this?" he asked.

TJ almost said yes. But he'd dreamed of something and worried he wouldn't have a chance to experience it. "I wanna take you from behind," he hissed. "Doggy style."

Steve grinned. "Should have guessed," he winked. He gave a couple of short shallow hip motions on that prick, as much for his own pleasure as for TJ's. Then he slid up and off, letting that heavy hard meat fall onto TJ's belly with a thud. Steve grinned and took a second to add some more lube with his fist. "I shouldn't be telling you to become an escort, but if you ever did, you'd make a killing, kiddo."

TJ laughed as he slipped out from under Steve, getting on his knees, as the older muscled man go on all fours. It was TJ's first good view of the man's ass. Round and muscled and waxed smooth. Greedily, the football player's hands gripped the hard mounds and felt them up for a second.

"You're an ass man all right," Steve chuckled, hiking his butt up for TJ's greedy hands.

TJ didn't know what he was. But he was rock hard and excited beyond belief. Like a porn star, he slapped his hard dick against those buns then slipped it down into the smooth crack.

"A little lower," Steve instructed then once that fat bludgeon of a dick head pressed against his pucker he hissed. "Yep, right there, stud." Bracing his upper body, he grunted, "I'm ready buddy... you can push it in."

TJ didn't know what was involved in fucking ass. But this guy was a professional, he figured. Once he got inside Steve's ass, he powered all the way in.

"God yes!" Steve cried, not too loud, but loud enough. "Fuck me kid."

TJ did. Hands gripping the escort's hips, he started a regular, fevered thrust. So this is what sex was about. The physical stimulation to his cock, the psychological pull of mating with another men, the sensory overload of it all. Slick fucking sounds, balls tapping Steve's taint, the heat of the older man's body beneath him, the scent of sex.

It took three minutes, and TJ wasn't going to hold back. Not now. "Unnngh!" he grunted as he entered orgasm. That cum seemed to go on, too, as TJ even got a little light headed from the intensity of it.

Meanwhile, Steve was fisting his meat and that professional ass was clenching down in regular timing as the man's own load sprayed the sheets.

TJ didn't want to pull out. But Steve was already stretching forward to ease off that still-hard dong. "Fuck, kid," he said as he rolled out from under TJ, with the help of the jock back up to let him. "I wouldn't have guessed that was your first."

TJ shot back a proud grin, placing his hands on his hips and letting his now slowly softening meat swing out, wet with lube and cum.

Steve almost laughed at the sight and the big smile on the jock's face. "How was your first time, man?"

TJ leaned in. He'd want another kiss before the man left. "Incredible," he said. "Gonna be hard to live up to this experience, I know."

Steve met the invitation to kiss. It wasn't prolonged, but it was the right mix of casual and romantic. "I'm afraid I gotta get to my trainer's session," he said. "I'll just rinse off first if that's OK."

"Yeah," TJ said. He sat on the bed and watched this perfect hunk strut to the bathroom. "I tapped that," he thought with excitement. "I actually fucked that guy."

***

TJ was watching ESPN, plopped up on the bed in some jeans and a sweatshirt when Mark Miller returned to the hotel room. He'd given a little extra time to be safe.

"So... how was it?" the father asked.

TJ looked up. "I can't even describe, Pop. So good. The guy was the best."

That made Mark happy. After the disaster with Susie, he wanted this time to be good for his son. That's when he saw the envelope. Still stuffed. "Didn't you give him the fee?" he asked, concerned something had gone wrong.

"Oh I did, Pop," TJ swore. "Or at least I tried to. Only he told me if was on the house."

"On the house?" Mark replied, sitting on the other bed. He'd never had a hooker turn down money.

TJ blushed. "You know, on account of my dick size."

Mark actually guffawed. "Well I'll be damned." He picked up the envelope, then tossed it back on the nightstand. "How bout this... you keep it, and next time you need a little escape from town, you'll have a little fun money. OK?"

"You sure, Pop?" TJ asked, sitting up.

"Sure I'm sure," the father said. He got weirdly emotional again. "Listen, Thomas, I won't try to bribe you to stay in Centerville. But if you do... listen, a man's got needs you know... well, damnit... I just want you happy Thomas."

It was a trip seeing his normally gruff father tongue tied. It broke down TJ's defenses some. "I'll make a go of it Pop. Run the business like you want. If I'm 25 and miserable, I'll figure it out then. But I'll do my best, Pop. Promise."

Mark smiled. He really had the best son in the world.

[valsnonsense]

The Wanillo Family

Wani was so hard to draw in this one aaaaaaaaaaa. Gave her a Mom hairdo sorry not sorry ksdfjsdlkf

Tresillo and Wani became really close REALLY quickly. After the events of WT, the two sought each other out frequently, mainly to chat music and dance together, which quickly led into playful flirting, which led to a whirlwind romance that never died away. These two are very cheeky lovers, often bragging about their talented partners to anyone who will listen. They didn’t even wait a whole year before they tied the knot like damn u two calm tf down

After they married, they decided to settle down in Trollstopia, since it was becoming the new hotspot to live. They lived the married life for a few years before lo and behold, Tresillo had an egg sittin up there! Tresillo and Wani were over the moon when they found out they were gonna be parents, and quickly welcomed little Yeona into the world.

After having Yeona, Tresillo and Wani actively retired from their official band/music group days, deciding to dedicate themselves to Yeona’s care and upbringing. While the individual groups were saddened that the two were leaving, Wani and Tresillo’s group were so happy for the two of them for moving on to the next stage in their lives. Yeona grew up with a lot of aunts, and was spoiled basically rotten by all of them.

The family still currently resides in Trollstopia. Tresillo runs a restaurant that Wani helps run, and on her off days, Yeona can be found working there as well.

And that’s the Wanillo fam!! Not much to explain here like last time, cuz Tresillo and Wani hit it off so well it could be considered aggravated assault. Also thank u to my amazing sib @anxious-art-block for teaching me how to do glasses (please ignore how shitty Yeona’s glasses are on her profile lskdjfsdlkfj)

[astarionancuntnin]

Unsolicited Lore Dump

Tagged by the amazing @nyx-knox - thank u i love u💕

Do you make your bed? EH once in a while i will flip back the 2 covers i use to sleep and i call it a day

Favorite number? 24, my birthdayyy

What's your job? im a Lead QA! i have a lil team of 8 nerds QAs that I help guide throughout the day and i love them so very much <3

If you could go back to school would you? oh YEAH theres so much stuff that im interested in, i think i would go back especially for languages or continue psychology

Can you parallel park? i dont wanna brag buttttttttttttt yes, and i learned solely based on a gif i saw pass around here YEARS ago before i even learned how to drive and got it on first try. my teacher was impressed uwu

Do you think aliens are real? THEY HAVE TO, the universe is so big, it would be dumb to think that were truly alone

Can you drive a manual car? god no i had an anxiety attack last time i tried. nono, i drive an electric car, i dont stress about no manual car

What's your guilty pleasure? ohhhhhhhhhhh good question. its gonna sound very general but treating myself to anything i want regardless of the repercussions it has on my wallet.

Tattoos? so many , if i listed them, they would take the entire post, (im basically covered in tattoos) but i can say that :

right arm has a "cute/beauty that can kill" theme

left arm is personal meaning/matching tattoos

right leg is gaming

left leg is witchy vibes

+ a flower in my ear and bongo cat under my tiddy

Favorite color? PORPOL. im in my lilac/lavender phase

Favorite types of music? I'm the kind of person to listen to a lot of genres, but soundtracks really hit the spot for me. I get carried on so easily by a good soundtrack, but otherwise i enjoy a good indie pop

Do you like puzzles? OH YEAH especially escape rooms, i had a phase last year and did like 10 of those. ngl i wanna go again, i miss those

Any phobias? spiders, i wanna like them but i cant i just cant

Favorite childhood sport? Soccer and artistic swimming, i was part of two sports clubs before moving out

Do you talk to yourself? Constantly

What movies do you adore? Emperor's new grove, in french canadian version specifically. comfort movie of all time

Coffee or tea? Coffee!! Bean juice makes me sleepy in big quantities but i find it so comforting, specially a caramel latte

First thing you wanted to be growing up? A singer safkhbsaglhabs;kfg

No pressure tags! but i would love to read up your infodumps uwu @danielsbackupglasses @communistfries @vixstarria @charmandabear

[yandere-daze]

I'm gonna ramble in your inbox so i don't clog up the dash (haha putting that on you!🫶) but listen listen. Imagine getting a shy voiceline, and you rate it with 5♡, the character is gonna be screaming into their pillow of joy that it worked. Imagine getting a cocky voiceline (like Shu, not offering, but telling you he will pick out clothes for you to wear) and rating them with a low number. They'd be punching the wall wondering what the hell went wrong. Imagine getting a character you dislike and not even listening before rating them with 1♡, depending on which character, they either fall into a state of depression and get lost from the code itself for a few days, or get so angry they bug out your game and make you incapable of logging in and getting any other voiceline...

And, like, literally so many are formulated as "you and character are out somewhere together (alone) and they notice you're cold and offer you a rather intimate way of warming up", with Koga offering you put your hands in his jacket's pockets and Arashi telling you she'll warm your hands in her own, I mean.... They have the freedom to show you what a winter date with them would be like, and how nice and caring and thoughtful they are..... and then you either show appreciation (5♡) and they can gloat and strut around like peacocks talking about "See? They love my line - my DATE. They want me." or you hit them with an L + ratio + i'd give you zero hearts if i could and they end the day sobbing into their pillow until it turns soggy and probably end up sabotaging the others or the game itself (so nobody gets a better score than them)

Altho i reckon the "average" scored ones would get interesting. The perfectionists would end up spending the entire year analysing who you gave a better score and who you gave a worse score so he can figure out your tastes and how to turn that 3 into a 5 for next year. The optimists would just go "hell yeah they liked it !!!! (Didn't give me a one)". The pessimists would aheem aheem sob sniffle and wonder what was missing. If only you could leave comments, too :((

Anyway. I just think about self-aware yandere enstars often.

No, no but you're so right with this!! You're always welcome to spam my inbox btw <3 ( or my dms lmao you know the drift)

But you as the player really have no idea how much of an impact your "insignificant" little rating has on the idols in the game. You're just reading a voice line, think it's cute, and then give it 5 stars before moving on with your day

But inside your phone, the character you gave that high rating to is completely over the moon, overjoyed and excited that they managed to impress you, that you liked their idea for a *date* with you!! Because that's obviously what all of this is about, yes? You're all alone on a snowy day so it counts 💕

But lmao I actually think it's so hilarious to see someone usually so confident and cocky like Shu or Izumi on their knees, crying, screaming, punching the ground because you gave them a low rating. How could this be??!!

I think they deserve to be humbled at least a little bit 😌 Maybe next time they'll learn to he a little nicer with you!

And ooh the ones that got a high rating would definitely brag and make everyone else either nervous ( because they haven't had their turn yet) or jealous (because you didn't give them a rating that high). The atmosphere at ES is going to be so these for the next few days, probably only topped by a valentine's event djdje

NOT THE L+RATIO 😭😭😭They really are going to start bawling their eyes out afterwards djrjr

But you mentioning the player just giving a character an automatic 1* rating without even reading the line makes me think about what might happen if you gave one of your favorite characters an immediate 5 star without actually paying too much attention.

Like, of course it's flattering but they also really wanted you to pay attention to what they had to say!! They wanted to go onto that (imaginary) date with you!!

And good thinking actually! I didn't even think about the average rating but I think you're right that getting a rating like that raises a lot of questions. So obviously they didn't do everything wrong but you also weren't too impressed. How are they going to figure out what to improve and what to leave out completely?? They can't really tell what you liked because you can't leave a comment...

So carefully observing everyone else's ratings is the way to go! Next year they will triumph over everyone else and win your heart!!

[db-gochifan]

GoChi Week 2023 - Day 3: Sunshine/Summer

Days: [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7]

Title: Beach Day Pairing: Goku/Chi-Chi; minor Gohan/Videl Characters: Son Goku, Chi-Chi, Son Gohan, Son Goten, Son Misaki, Videl and Pan Summary: The Son family enjoys a weekend at the beach. Do not copy, repost, use it in any form or claim this work to be your own. Cross-posted on AO3

Misaki jumped out of her bed very early that morning and ran towards Goten’s bedroom. She didn’t even bother knocking on his door; she just stormed in and jumped on his bed.

“Ten! Ten!” She pulled his blanket away and started shaking him up. “Come on, wake up!”

“What the hell are you doing, Saki?” He pushed her away and covered himself up again.

“No, you need to wake up!” She pulled it off again and the two siblings started a small fight. “We… are… going… to… the… beach!”

“I know. But we still don’t need to wake up so early.” He tried to give one more push on his blanket, but Misaki was faster.

“You’re such a pain sometimes.” He mumbled with annoyance and jumped out of his bed.

“I love you too, Ten!”

An hour later, the smell of breakfast filled the Son residence. By that time, everyone was awake. Misaki and Goten were preparing the food while Chi-Chi and Goku were packing their bag for the day.

“Is Trunks really gonna be there?” The teenager asked, trying her best to hide her hope but failing.

“That’s what he said, but listen… don’t get too hopeful about him.”

“What do you mean?”

But before he could answer, – much to his happiness – Goku and Chi-Chi walked in the kitchen.

“Good morning, my babies.”

“Mom, please, we’re teenagers.” Misaki rolled her eyes, but gave a small smile.

“Why must you be so annoying, Saki?” Goten defended their mother.

“Shut up.” She nudged him on the ribs. “Mom knows I didn’t mean it, right, mom?”

“Right.”

“What do we have for breakfast?” Goku looked from his youngest child to his wife and back and found it better to say something.

“Ten made some pancakes.” The girl replied as she watched her brother put a plate with a large pile of them on the table, and laughed when her father grabbed one right away.

“I don’t mean to brag, but they are amazing.”

“They really are.” The oldest Saiyan said, with his mouth full of food.

“Goku, you shouldn’t talk with a full mouth.” Chi-Chi called him out.

“I can’t help it.” He said apologetically, still with pancakes in his mouth.

“Some things never change.” She shook her head with a light smile and sat on a chair.

The two men followed her suit and Misaki put a teapot in the center of the table before doing the same.

****

The weather was very nice that morning, and the sun was already shining bright by the time the family walked out of the Son residence and head to the beach.

“Goku, can you help me with this?”

“Sure.” He walked to the trunk of their car and grabbed two of the many bags they had brought. “Geez, Misaki sure brings a lot of luggage.”

“Dad, these are all my essential items for a trip.”

“We are only staying for the weekend. I can’t imagine what you would take if you were traveling for a couple of weeks.”

“She would take our whole house, for sure.”

“Shut up!” Misaki lightly slapped Goten in the arm. “And help me carry my stuff.”

“You slap me and expect me to help you?”

“Don’t be such a baby.” She rolled her eyes with fake annoyance. “It barely hurt you.”

“Still, you shouldn’t hit your older brother.”

“I’m sorry, Ten.” She kissed him on the cheek. “Now will you help me?”

“Wow, that didn’t sound genuine at all.” He laughed. “But I will help you because I’m nice.”

“Of course you are.”

“Shut up!”

Chi-Chi smiled seeing the beach house full of people a couple of hours later, but for her the joy of the weekend was her two-year granddaughter, Pan. She absolutely loved the relationship between her and Goku. Even though she was really young, she already possessed a great power and loved sparring with her grandpa.

“She really inherited the Son blood. You can tell how much she loves to fight at such a young age.”

“Not only our blood.” Gohan corrected his mother. “The Satan’s too.”

“Of course. Sometimes I forget they are a family of fighters too.” She bent forward to look at her daughter-in-law. “I’m sorry, Videl.”

“It’s alright, Chi-Chi.” Videl smiled kindly at her. “I haven’t fought in a while, and my father… well…”

Gohan put his hand on her shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. The young couple exchanged smiles before Pan came running to them.

“Mommy, thirsty.”

Videl grabbed a plastic baby bottle full of water in her green bag and handed it to her daughter, who drank the whole liquid in less than a minute. She had definitely inherited the Son genes.

“More.”

“I’m sorry, Pan, but that was the only bottle of water I have with me.”

“I can take her back to the house, if you want.” Chi-Chi suggested.

“Are you sure, mom?” Gohan asked over Videl’s head. “Cause I really don’t mind doing it.”

“Yes, I’m sure.” She stood up and stretched her arm towards her granddaughter. “I’d love to spend some time with my lovely Pan. Don’t you, darling?”

The little girl nodded with enthusiasm, but instead of grabbing her grandma’s hand, she stretched both her little arms towards her, clearly wanting to be picked up. The brunette woman bent down and picked her up.

“You two enjoy the beach, we’ll be back soon.”

“Thanks, mom.”

“Where are they going?”

“Pan wanted more water, but we ran out of it. So mom took her to the house to give her some more.”

“I see.” He scratched the back of his neck and looked in the direction they had left minutes ago. “I… uh… I’m going to take a nap.”

“I’m sorry to say this, but your father is a terrible liar.”

“He always has been, so you don’t have to be sorry. It’s a fact.” Gohan couldn’t help but laugh.

“Pan, if you keep drinking so much water, you’ll be going to the bathroom a lot.” An eye-widened Chi-Chi said after handing her granddaughter her fifth glass of water in a row.

“More, grandma.” The little girl said after drinking it.

“The Saiyan genes.” She rolled her eyes, but filled her glass one more time anyway.

“We do have some good ones.” Goku joked with a grin when he walked in.

“Goku? What are you doing here?”

“I just came up with this idea.”

“What idea?” She raised her eyebrows at him, clearly intrigued with what he was about to say next.

“You will find out pretty soon.” He reached out for her hand and led her and Pan out of the house. “Let’s go.”

“Goku, I don’t think this is a good idea.” Chi-Chi said unsure after Goku told her his plan. “She’s too little for that.”

“Everything will be fine, we’ll be with her.”

“Still, it’s dangerous.”

“Grandpa, what is this thing called nimbus again?” Pan tugged on his shorts and he looked down at her.

“It’s the coolest thing ever, you’ll find out in a few seconds.” He picked her up and placed her on his shoulder. “Now can you help me call it?”

“Call it? How?”

“By whistling, like this.” Goku placed two fingers inside his mouth and a whistle came through his lips. A couple of seconds later, he called for nimbus and the fluffy golden cloud came to them.

“Soft!” The child bent forward with her tiny arms stretched, eagerly trying to touch Nimbus, 22/08 and almost fell down from her grandpa’s shoulders.

“Oops!” He caught her in the air and put her on Nimbus.

Pan started squealing and screaming when she felt the texture of the golden cloud beneath and the soft noise it made as it waited for Goku’s instructions. “Grandma, come.” She stretched her arms towards Chi-Chi, signalizing for her to join her.

“Yeah, grandma, come.” Goku teased and then glanced at his wife with a mischievous look.

She gave him a death glare as she passed by him and sat on Nimbus, placing Pan on her lap.

“Grandpa, are we doing this or what?” She didn’t bother hiding the annoyance in his voice, but she knew he knew it was just a fake one.

“Of course.” He proceeded to sit in front of them, with his legs crossed. He looked over his shoulder towards them. “Are you ready?”

“Yes!” Pan said excitedly and pumped her fist in the air. “Let’s go!”

Pan was delighted with the view below. She had a large grin on her face and her eyes were sparkling with happiness.

“Grandma, look!” She looked at Chi-Chi in awe and then back down. She had leaned towards the cloud so much that the woman had to hold her tight, so she wouldn’t fall. “It’s so pretty!”

“Yes, it is.” There was a nostalgic tone in her voice, which attracted Pan’s attention again. “It takes me back to my young days.”

“Have you rode it before, grandma?”

“I did.” Chi-Chi confirmed. “When your grandpa were kids, that’s how we used to travel around.”

“So this is a very old cloud.”

“Clouds don’t age.” Goku said after laughing. “But Chi-Chi is right, we used to travel around on it.”

“Daddy too?”

“That’s right. And uncle Goten and aunt Misaki too. They all loved riding it.”

“Grandpa?”

“Yes, Pan.”

“Do you think I can ride it alone one day?”

“Sure you can, when you’re old enough for it.”

“Ah, that’s gonna be years from now.” She crossed her arms and pouted.

“I’m afraid so, but in the meantime you can ride it with us whenever you can.” Chi-Chi said with a gentle smile.

“Really?”

“Of course!” Goku replied, looking over his shoulder.

“Thank you, grandpa!” She jumped on his back and wrapped her tiny arms around his neck, to Chi-Chi’s despair.

“Don’t scare me like that, Pan. You could’ve fallen from this cloud.”

“I’m sorry, grandma.” Pan returned to her previous position and crossed her legs, but didn’t stay much longer there.

****

Misaki was sitting on a small wall that separated the sidewalk from the beach, swinging her legs calmly. It was quite a contrast to how she was feeling inside, seeing Trunks with Fayra having fun together.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”

“I’m sorry for this.” Goten sat beside her and looked at his best friend and his girlfriend. “I know this isn’t easy for you.”

“Ah, well…” She bit her lower lip and put a lock of her long black hair behind her ear. “You can’t have anything, right? He doesn’t know I have feelings for him, so…”

“That’s true, but it still hurts.”

“It does.” Misaki sighed. “But I’ll be okay. It was better for it to happen right now than in the future, if something happened. But I doubt he’d look at me like this.”

“Don’t say that. You’re beautiful too. In fact, you’re more beautiful than her.”

“Did you really say that?” She turned to look at her brother with widened eyes. “I think I did. So cherish it, it doesn’t happen that often.”

“Why must you ruin every moment?” She slapped him in the arm in a playful way.

“It wouldn’t be me if I didn’t do that.” He joked and laughed. Then he wrapped his arm around her shoulder, and she rested her head on his. “Are you better?”

“I will be within time.”

“If it makes you feel any better, I think it’s his loss.”

“Thank you, Ten.” She gave him a soft smile and placed her hand over his on her shoulder. “It means a lot.”

“Auntie Saki.” Pan stopped in front of her and looked up, with curious eyes. “Are you crying?”

“No, I…” Misaki wiped the tears from her eyes. “There was just something in my eyes.”

“Yes, she was.” Goten told the truth and received a death glare from his younger sister. “Sorry, Saki, but you can’t really lie to your niece.”

“Auntie Saki, I know something that can cheer you up.” The little girl flew up and landed on her legs.

“Really? What is it?”

“We should take a ride on nimbus.”

“What?”

“But Pan, you just came out of one.”

“Can’t I ride it again with auntie Misaki?” She looked at Chi-Chi over her shoulder with pleading eyes. “She needs it.”

“Of course it’s okay, Pan.” Goku said with his usual grin.

“Goku, shouldn’t we ask Gohan and Videl first?”

“She won’t be riding it with a stranger, Chi-Chi, it’s her aunt. Besides, I don’t think they’re going too far from here.”

“I guess you’re right. Just don’t take too long to come back.”

“We won’t.”

****

The sea breeze messed up Chi-Chi’s long black hair and she softly put a lock behind her ear. The sun was setting in the horizon, and the sky was colored in yellow, orange and red tones. Seconds later, Goku sat beside her and handed her a strawberry popsicle, while he finished a grape one.

“It’s a beautiful sunset, isn’t it?” He asked, mesmerized by the beautiful scenario across him.

“It really is.” She rested her head on his shoulder and closed her eyes, feeling more relaxed. “It’s been a fun weekend.”

“For sure. The weather really helped.” He saw her lifting her head and raised his eyebrows when she looked at him intensely. “What?”

“I’m just thinking I’m very lucky for finding you.”

“I’m just as lucky.”

Chi-Chi turned to look at the sun setting again and was surprised by Goku’s hand on her left cheek. He gently turned her face to him and looked right into her beautiful black eyes for a moment. Her heart started beating faster as their faces got closer to each other and she automatically closed her eyes. She moved to find a better angle seconds later after their lips touched and couldn’t help but think the scenario made that moment even more perfect. They broke away after some minutes and touched foreheads. A warm smile appeared on Chi-Chi’s lips and he found himself smiling too.

“I love you.” The words came out of his lips in such a natural way. He decided to embrace how he felt a long time ago.

“I love you too.” She replied in a soft tone and shivered a little when he caressed her cheek with the back of his fingers.

“Grandpa!” Pan came running and jumped on his back. “Piggyback ride!”

“Panny, you’re ruining their moment.”

“Huh?” She looked at Misaki with confusion in her face.

“She didn’t ruin anything.” Chi-Chi placed Pan over Goku’s shoulders and helped him stand up, laughing at her pretending to be riding a horse. “Let’s go home.”

[anyways-wonderwall]

Album of the Week #48

In My Defense

(2019)

by Iggy Azalea

Overall Rating: 2.5/10

TL;DR: I gotta stop putting joke albums on the ‘to review’ list

(I don't like the font but other than that this album cover is pretty good! mysterious and edgy 7/10)

Overall Thoughts

Now this hurts to write, but I went through a pretty big Iggy Azalea phase in middle school. “Fancy” had just come out, I was at the age when swearing was the coolest thing you could do, and seeing Iggy twerk on stage made me feel like I was a grown up. While reviewing this album I went back and listened to some of her early hits, just to make sure younger me wasn’t completely deaf because god is this album terrible. 

I feel like most people reading this wasn’t expecting the album to be a masterpiece but I had hope! In her early songs the writing is pretty good, the backing track is good enough to dance along to, and she has a rags to riches story. This album falls into that ‘I’m rich, I’m hot, you’re a hater because you’re jealous’ which is fine for like, a song or two. Twelve is far beyond where I would want to tap out. 

Most of the backing tracks here sound terribly empty and confused (“Hoemita,” “Freak of the Week”) and many of them feature this terrible sound that makes it seem like your speakers have peaked. Why the hell would you do that, I literally cannot think of a single reason. It is horribly annoying, drowns out the vocals, makes me think my headphones are broken, and just makes the song unlistenable (“Clap Back,” “Hoemita,” “Big Bag,” “Freak of the Week”).

The writing also leaves a lot to be desired (to put it nicely). She constantly brags about being the first to do what she does (“Thanks I Get”) when she’s just factually not?? Like sorry Iggy but not a single person is going to believe you there. She constantly talks about how what she is doing is unique when she’s offering nothing new in a single song she does. The best sounding parts of her songs are when she repeats the same line 20 times because familiarity makes your brain like anything. The only songs with a decent flow and track are “Commes Des Garcons” and “Just Wanna” with the second sounding super similar to “Her” by Megan Thee Stallion which came out earlier this year. 

To finish this off I just wanna share some of my favorite lines, which is really the only gratifying part of reviewing albums like this. 

“Hoemita” features the line (with no punchline or build up) “turn this beat to a diabetic”. I have been analyzing this for days and still cannot figure out what it means, someone please help me out.

“Started” has “you fronting like breasts” which yes Iggy, breasts are in the front of your body

“Commes Des Garcons” has “whenever I post a pic they go nuts like semen” which honestly goes really hard

And last but not least “Pussy Pop” has the wonderful line “got green like luigi.” Thank you for defending my man Iggy, he is always stuck living in his brother’s shadow.

Final Thoughts

Just uhhh, don’t listen to this. If you like rap maybe give the two I thought were decent a shot and if you don’t like those you definitely won’t like any others. Also why does Iggy keep saying she’s gonna nut?? Is that anatomically correct?? This album leaves me with more questions than answers.

[greyves-under-fire]

My whole problem is i was BOTH

The thing about gifted kid syndrome is it can still severely impact you and leave you broken long before you're out of the school system

I was "gifted" until sixth grade when i then had to spend almost every recess inside in study hall "finishing" papers that i could never finish.

I had it all, the undiagnosed adhd, and autism, and dyscalculia, had undiagnosed mood and personality disorder, and was starting to develop arthritis and fibromyalgia on top of developmental depression and anxiety.

I started barely making my grades, being lucky to make it above a c, forgetting what it was like to see an a

But my reputation was there. It had been thoroughly developed as "the smart kid" and the one who had the answers to everything. If we're splitting into groups for a class activity, nobody liked me- but everybody wanted me.

But then, every other answer became "i don't know" or followed by "i'm probably wrong" and often was.

I still remember what it felt like to be looked at with such confused disappointment from people i didn't know very well, who treated me like i owed them my knowledge.

Like i had betrayed them and their image of me.

I just got worse, i was put into so many credit recovery classes, i couldn't *do* anything at all, and i was tortured for it by teachers who knew of my "potential" and were disappointed in me when i'd only had them that year.

When gifted kid burnout happens before you're out of high school, it's a level of shitty that is built upon this expectation that people you don't even know are placing on you.

It's having current teachers brag to the next one you'll have about how talented you are, how amazing you'll do next year. It's walking into that new classroom and watching every day as you disappoint this teacher a little more every day bc "you're wasting your potential. I know you can do better than this."

there's no breaking it to them at the start that you're gonna be no good in their class and not getting their hopes up. It's watching their hopes be taken down, brick by brick, every day, just by existing the way that you are right now.

It's your parents hearing how amazing you're doing, how brilliant you are, then watching you to pick up on every single moment that you aren't "trying" hard enough when being alive is so hard, you barely are. You never stop hearing, "what happened? What changed?" and even if you can put it into words, it's knowing they aren't listening.

It's constant reminders of how disappointing you are as a person, to those around you, in the state you are in right now.

And all the while, while the adults in my life are all being little bitches about a kid they're projecting all their failed dreams on, i am in miserable, godforsaken PAIN every single day. I woke up every morning feeling like i'd been hit by a truck, and by the time i got home, had to actually crawl to a chair before i fell down from the exhaustion and pain i was in. I was cracking my wrists every hour to stop the fluid from building up in them, and couldn't keep my mind off of how brutally it feels like my lower spine was being crushed in someone's large fist.

While all the adults around me were saying, "if you just *applied* yourself", I was experiencing manic rage and my fourth sobbing panic attack in the bathroom over the terrifying h*micidal images swirling in my head bc i was MANIC and under so much fucking pressure, now terrified of myself.

While i was getting the "look" again of, "oh what happened to this pathetic kid"- I was IN THE MIDDLE OF RECOVERING FROM HOW INTENSELY PAINFUL IT WAS TO STRETCH MY ARMS A SECOND BEFORE, AND HOW I FELT LIKE IF I CARRIED THAT BACKPACK FOR FIVE MORE SECONDS, I WAS GOING TO BREAK DOWN AND START MANICALLY SOBBING WHILE PUNCHING A TREE BECAUSE EVERYTHING WAS SO SORE AND SO PAINFUL AND MY BODY WAS SO UNBELIEVABLY TIRED, AND AT 15, THE JOINTS IN MY HANDS WERE DEFORMING BEFORE THEY'RE EVEN FINISHED FORMING- (op i want to clarify that this is rage directed at the adults in my life at that time and not you, lol)

And then after all the (take a shot for every time i use the word "disappointment") that you've already caused, asking for accomodation when you desperately need it is a complete joke.

You get treated not only as an inconvenience, to put it lightly, but like you've somehow slighted your teachers and the adults around you by letting them down and giving them the experience of watching you fall so far *ACADEMICALLY*, that they act like going any farther for you is so incredibly unjust.

They act as if you have asked so much of them by failing already, that they treat you as absolutely selfish and unaware for requiring more, like a break from typing to sit in the hallway bc the joints in my hands are so stiff/painful/swollen that i'm starting to cry from overwhelm.

I then did have to drop out. Idk. I just wanted to make the point that everything you mentioned AND gifted kid burnout syndrome don't have to be, and often aren't mutually exclusive. I still fully get the point, but i wanted to offer that perspective, too, because when you are already dealing with all the other details you mentioned ON TOP of a bunch of adults being absolutely PATHETIC about how "sad" you make them bc of some stupid expectation they put on some kid they hardly know, it is just supremely shitty bc it tells you where your values lie to the adults around you.

I spent my entire teen years coming to wonder why it even mattered so much that i couldn't get my papers finished but that no one cared when i told them that i felt like i was actually dying every day.

Maybe i just wanted this post to exist for the kids who experienced both sides of the spectrum of people mentioned in your post, or maybe i just wanted to talk about mine, but idk

Kinda fucked up that we all coo and sympathize with "former gifted kids" but never talk about the students who had to stay late after school or over the summer for remedial classes/clubs, who struggled to get above a C, who were given up on or punished. Who tried so hard to understand or just couldn't. Who were grouped with the "stupid kids" (a classmate called us that in remedial math btw)

Autistic kids and adhders who can't relate to their gifted peers and are constantly alienated by them. Kids who struggled in school due to dealing with a chronic or mental illness or physical/learning/developmental disability. Those of us who have had to drop out of highschool or college. Kids who worked so hard and wanted to be seen as smart, but never were. Who watched as their peers seem to fly by them in school, while they were left behind. Who were bullied and put down by those in the gifted and honors classes. Whose confidence was absolutely destroyed by education.

I love you all and I'm so sorry the school system failed you. I'm sorry you weren't properly accommodated and given the education you deserved. I'm sorry people put you down for something that they never had to fight for.

[ilhyuuq]

understand. (pt.1)

the fact that I haven't posted for maybe half a year. ridiculous, right? lots of stuff and weird things have happened to my life, I went for a trip from may-June to Japan (Tokyo) turns out someone that I hate a lot is also there during the time I was there (made me gag.) anyways, through out the trip we visited a lot of places we used to go, since I'm half-Japanese and Half-Taiwanese. I missed it a lot, the breeze and the wind that turned me into another person. although this is supposed to be something happy and exciting, what changed was that I lost someone I really thought had my back. well, we didn't lose her like physically, I just lost a person I could call ''mom.'' spiritually. she's basically like a stranger now to me, we don't really talk anymore, in fact we didn't ever since we came back. I really was stupid enough to really think that she had always been a good mother. she never defend me against criticisms, never really listened to what I said, made jokes that made me become more insecure, emotionally manipulate me into thinking I was wrong (basically gaslighting), and she would never admit that she is wrong. a matter of fact is that I had a thought, ''if I was hit by a car one day, would she come and care? or even if she would come to the hospital and visit?" or just continue to ignore her daughter and thinks that she's playing as a good mother. I know that I am already really privileged and that there's more terrible things happening in the world. but have you ever thought about what is it like for a perfect family? I know I know, there isn't something ever called perfect in the world. but to most people there certainly is. maybe the reason why my mom acts like this is probably because I am pretty mature for my age, well I am 14.. and I don't look my age, I'm not trying to say that ''oh I do make ups and dresses slutty and cusses and spoiled.'' I know this seems a bit way too much stereotypical, and I shouldn't use the word ''slutty'' but forgive me, that's how I see the world now. I know this is really biased. and I understand that, but there are just different perspective in each other's mind and heart you might not say it nor express it but I would always respect other's opinions. anyhow, I dress up nice and elegantly, have very nice manner and is polite to almost everyone (except some rude individuals.) some people often mistaken me as an aunty to my sister, and she is 21. how crazy. well I m not trying to brag. but I understand that my parents are always busy, so I never really wanted to bother them, I never tell them about my stress, because I just didn't want them to be stressed even more. I understand that. me and my sister are really close, she is the only person in the world who I could trust the most, and my dad. I really do love them a lot but they just never understand me, they don't get me. I don't ever think in this world, that anyone would understand me like REALLY do. but still, I had to keep all these emotions in, causing horrible mental health issues, although I am a goof ball in my house, I rarely ever act like this outside, I'm afraid that people are gonna see the bad side of me, and they won't ever acknowledge it. you now how cruel people can be. they can destroy someone inside-out. brutally.

but I am still a child. I am still a kid, I don't want to be forced to grow up, losing all my youth into becoming someone that's sad and depressed. I don't want that, I still want to enjoy my childhood and be there for myself. yesterday, I had a fight with my sister, I know the mood swings? I probably have bipolar or something (just kidding.) the moment me and my sister were screaming and fighting, yelling words at each other, I just felt so tired. I didn't desire something like that, I was exhausted, I ran out of my house and sat on my porch at 12:39, keep in mind that I didn't bring my phone out with me. I checked the clock for a very specific reason, I wanted to see if they really still cared about me. I held my tiger plush from Ikea that I got myself for my birthday, the only thing that was there for me even if it wasn't alive. the moment I sat down outside, no chair or anything, I just sat on the block of rocks, in my pjs, the moment I hugged my plush, I burst out crying, the fact that when me and my sister were fighting, I didn't drop a tear. I held it in, although I was hurt. but I knew that there was barely anyone that could held me like the way I wish someone could comfort me, I cried a lot outside, my eyes turned really pink from all the crying, I could barely open them. but now that I know there is only going to be my tiger plush for me. I fully accepted that now I only have myself. someone who needs fixing and care. I just have to act like I don't care, or someone who is mature, yea maybe I am. I love the word mature, so forced myself to chase after that meaning, I want to reach the definition of it, so I wouldn't be such big problems for my parents to take care of. cold wind in the night blows and lands on my face, I went for a walk around the neighbourhood, I just wished at least one person could care, finally after few 10 minutes (I thought at that time) my dad finally came out and talked out the problems with me, he escorted me back inside the house, I checked the time. it was 2:12. insane. they let a kid sit outside for more than 1 hour, and nobody ever came. from that moment I knew. I knew it. I was right about testing if they really cared about me. or they just don't care that if their kid gets kidnap or killed? or maybe they don't considered me as a "kid" anymore. not to mention, my mom had favouritism for my sister, I know that I am always the extra one in this trio. funny thing is that people always say trios don't work. now lemme tell you that quads don't work either. I've been abandoned by them, like throwing away a piece of trash that is worth nothing, no matter how hard I try.

I'll talk about favouritism next part (pt.2)

(DO NOT copy down my words and reposting it, I worked hard to type it. and this is an original experience from me, my story that I want to tell to the world. words will be send it to laws, with a lawsuit.) Do Not claim my paragraph as yours.

(posting almost everyday, hope my words help you speak out.) actually now that I think of it, I really haven't been posting :p

[moonshynecybin]

I watched hitting the apex and I’m beginning to think Jorge Lorenzo was the only one with at least semi normal parents in the way of how they viewed his injuries and racing like his dad wanted him to stop because of a crash he had just before he started in the championship.

Compared to Vale’s father who views his son has something he can brag about that seems more normal to me. I’m not sure about Marc and Alex parents but at least Marc had Alex cause I can’t believe he was gonna race in Indonesia in 2022 after that warm up crash and the only thing that stopped him was Alex told him not to race.

okay first of all jorge has maybe the LEASTTTTT normal relationship with his parents it is actually insane. i encourage you to google it because JEEZ. second of all like. i appreciate there is maybe some nuance to the situation here, but we don’t know if marc’s parents asked him not to race/told him he shouldn’t! i can’t speak too much from when he was a teenager, but he was 29 years old in 2022. and had been holding the responsibility of the family’s finances on his back for nearly a decade. AND he’s been very successful racing with injures in the past…. like it’s a complex relationship! and i have no doubt some people told him not to race (they didn’t remove all of the tires from his personal bikes when he was rehabbing his arm for NOTHING. they did it because he had probably IGNORED THEM in the past. that’s not something you just DO) but i think it’s incredibly notable that alex was the one that he LISTENED TO. that didn’t fold when the full force of marc marquez’s freakish force of will pointed itself at him. it literally HAD to be alex

[juangallojongaro]

Recently, I spent a non-insignificant sum on tickets to see The Killers during their upcoming Las Vegas residency. A couple months prior, I bought tickets to see Death Cab & The Postal Service perform their now 20 year old breakthrough records. This is not to brag, but only to say: I am not relevant. I am a skeleton. I am an irrelevant skeleton. 

Once I looked at my music list as an Important Document of the Past Year. I’d try to listen to all the stuff, read the lists, and put together a coherent and definitive list. I didn’t do that in 2024; I didn’t try, I didn’t care to try, and, therefore, I just didn’t listen to that much stuff. This is fine! My life is no better or worse for the change! Also, no one gives a shit about what I listened to last (or any) year! 

So, a format change. I’m gonna list a bunch of songs I liked with the normal commentary. After that, I’ll rank my top ten movies of the year and my top five favorite books I read in 2023. Sound good? I think it’s fine.

2023 YEAR IN MUSIC!

Big Thief - “Vampire Empire” A slow dawning of just, like, oh, Big Thief is just one of my favorite bands. They’re hitting that mid-2010’s (teens? Twenty-tens? What are we doing with this one?) The National-zone where every record they put out is a unique and rockin’ bop. This track is a good example of the more aggressive yelly-stuff. 

boygenius - “Not Strong Enough” 2023 was the year of Taylor Swift and the guys were a part of it. My favorite supergroup was at their peak powers last year, releasing the ALBUM OF THE YEAR as well as MY FAVORITE CONCERT OF THE YEAR WHERE I CRIED A BIT DURING “COOL ABOUT IT”. I fucking love that record so much. Before they all blew up, Baker was the stealth star carrying the pathos while Dacus made us sad and Bridgers screamed excellently. Just watch them on SNL; they’re so happy. It’s nice.

The New Pornographers - “Pontius Pilate’s Home Movies” Not much to say about a middling album that produced this banger with the funniest line of the year, “Now you're clearing the room just like Pontius Pilate/When he showed all his home movies/All of his friends yelling, ‘Pilate, too soon’” Side note: You ever notice how English people don’t say “quotation marks,” but instead, “inverted commas?” Frankly, it’s fucked up.

Slaughter Beach, Dog - “My Sister in Jesus Christ” Really enjoyed this album by the former Modern Baseball co-frontman. He’s settled into a more shambolic pop-oriented sensibility which suits him fine.

Sufjan Stevens - “Will Anybody Ever Love Me?” I kinda came to Javelin late but after sitting through several listens it’s definitely in the pantheon of Stevens albums. I’m not sure there’s anything on here that’s a hit, but it’s so lush, dense, and achingly beautiful. He’s a man genius. ALSO ALBUM OF THE YEAR; SURE, WHY NOT?

Taylor Swift - “Cruel Summer” I don’t care this song came out in 2022. I’m in my Lovers Era! It’s pop perfection! I love(er) it! I have a lot of thoughts about Taylor Swift but no one caaaaaaaaaares. Go Chiefs.

Wednesday - “Chosen to Deserve” A twangy, meandering tune about all the embarrassing things you did when you were younger and still torment you and will forever except now you’re in love so maybe it won’t be so bad anymore? BONUS: Really enjoyed MJ Lenderman’s live album; those Wednesday folks are doing great!

2023 YEAR IN CINEMA!

Best Pictures

Past Lives (*****)

Anatomy of a Fall (****1/2)

Godzilla Minus One (****1/2)

Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (****1/2)

The Zone of Interest (****1/2)

Poor Things (****1/2)

Barbie (****)

All of Us Strangers (****)

Oppenheimer (****)

Showing Up (****)

Four Daughters (****)

Honorary Mention

Stop Making Sense (****)

Best Short Film

Donald Trump NOOOOOOO

The First Twelve Seconds of the Maestro Trailer “If Movie List doesn’t sing in you, then nothing sings in you. And if nothing sings in you, you can’t make Movie List.”

2023 YEAR IN BOOKS!

(In no particular order)

Nixon Agonistes: The Crisis of the Self-Made Man by Garry Wills

The Luminaries by Eleanor Catton

The Narrow Road to the Deep North by Richard Flanagan

The Goodbye People by Gavin Lambert

Blood Meridian or The Evening Redness in the West by Cormac McCarthy

[elliebear666]

I was very kind, loving, affectionate, and patient with my ex bf. I tried to listen on the phone but that's just hard for me. I validated him. I praised him. I didn't hit him, or ridicule him, or roll my eyes at his passions. I didn't talk shit about him to my friends. I was gentle, listened while he cried, held him when I cried. We learned together. We grew together.

I am reactive. If someone is abusing me, chances are I'll start reacting. Realistically, if someone is good to me? I'm not going to be a bitch to them at all. I might be back and forth due to splitting, I may have episodes of crying or upset or get angry or paranoid during times or duress.

I'm not just out here abusing people. Ffs. Did I used to lie about and to everyone all the time? Sure. Was it to hurt them? No. It was literally just to cradle my false self and keep truth safe from abuse. I quit lying.

To the peeps I DID lie about, years ago? I am sorry. I honestly didn't think it would get back to anyone. I wasn't trying to destroy anyone's reputation lmao. I was being a selfish jerk XD

Now? Don't treat me like and I won't react. One day I'll just smile and walk away. I'm working on that.

Don't cut me down and say "just kidding!" That's fucking trash behaviour and I won't accept it ever again. If my passions are gonna get eye rolls from you? I'm done. If you hit me when playing games? Done. If you say, "Let's play the license plate game!" and repeatedly hit me even though I said I don't want to play? I'm fucking done. If you ignore my needs and wants to focus on your own? I'm done. If you cut me down and make me feel insignificant and small and worthless? Big time done.

Don't abuse me until I fucking get sick of it and retaliate. That's fucking evil.

Treat me right and you'll probably have a super sweet, affectionate, passionate gf that genuinely gives a major fuck about you. I do anything I can for people I care about.

You can either be one of those... or the kind I get sick of being treated badly by.

✌

P.S. if I'm not sucking your cock good enough, tell me, and I'll work on it. My goal is to have whoever my boi is brag about how good I slurp that dick.

P.S.S. As long as it isn't basically battery acid, or so thick it'll choke me to death, I swallow!

[zombholic]

fren, ellie or abby tryna be calm around reader. i'm in love with that types of stuff <3

𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍

𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘹 𝘧𝘦𝘮 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳

“you should’ve seen the way i killed that son of a bitch! like pow! grabbed his head and slammed him into the pole” you listened in and out to owen bragging about killing a hunter, quite honestly you wanted to slam owens head into a pole. you were dragged to a small get together manny was throwing in celebration of his long patrol, you only came for the food.

“no one cares owen” nora squeezed herself in between you and manny “you look bored” letting out a small laugh you looked over to her “no shit, if owen keeps talking i’m gonna break his face” you replied to her which earned you a chuckle from her and manny who you guessed was listening in. “hey guys” you looked up and saw abby walking in, late as usual to everything else, didn’t surprise anyone “finally, lemme grab you a drink” manny sat up from his spot to grab his stashed liquor.

you gaze lingered a bit on her, you knew every detail on abbys face like the back of your hand. her freckles, the way her eyes crinkle when she smiles, if someone asked you to describe what she looked like it would be like a perfect picture taken of her. guessing abby felt your eyes on her she looked over to you, a smile appearing on her face before she walked over to you “take a picture loser” she chuckled ruffling up your hair “shut up, i just zoned out” you let out a laugh, quickly fixing your hair as you looked up at her through your lashes.

she bit down her bottom lip, her blue eyes dancing from your eyes to your lips every couple of seconds “here you go” manny sorta interrupted, handing her a cup filled with alcohol that she’ll probably won’t even take a sip out of “thanks” she nodded her head to him, her eyes back on yours “so, what’s new kid?” nora was now sat futher away from you, giving abby the chance to sit right next to you “kid? we’re the same age you dork” you flipped her off jokingly “i’m like a year older than you” she sat her cup down on the coffee table, leaning back against the couch with one arm stretched on top of it.

“are you reading anything new?” you asked as you fiddled with your fingers, abby glancing down at your hands before back up to your face “dude yeah, i’m reading about this kid who was sent some letter from this wizard school…” you listened at her went on about her book, you loved hearing her talk and you especially loved when she would tell you about the things she loved “you should read it to me, you know i’m not capable of reading a book without gettin-“ “distracted, i know” she finished your sentence with a smile on her face, your face now feeling a bit hot.

you two went on talking about millions of things, one thing other’s weren’t able to do with abby was keep a conversation with her because of how bored she would get but with you she felt she could talk about everything and never get bored “i’m going on patrol tomorrow morning, i swear i never can get a break” she groaned out annoyed “i’ll come with you” you offered, placing your hand on her thigh in comfort you could feel her body tense up from your touch before she relaxed again “real-really? i’d love that” her eyes hung a but low now, staring at your hand then back over to you.

it was the next morning, you had almost forgotten you offered to go with abby on patrol but lucky you made it on time, both of you walking to your destination which wasn’t too far. “you know, you have really nice eyebrows abs” you smoothed out her brows with your thumbs, you were facing her while walking backwards “really? i never cared for them” she chuckled before quickly grabbing your wrists and pulling you close to her “almost hit the wall dumbass” she looked down at you “what would you do without me” she let out a laugh as did you but you both stayed in that position.

“let’s go before we get killed by infected” you kinda joked as you started walking forward this time abby following right next to you. both of you reached the tall building, you looked around trying to see which way to get inside before abby called for you “ladder” she pointed over to the stairs and ladders “how are you gonna reach that?” you walked over to her looking up knowing damn well it would be difficult to pull down “gimme your backpack” following her orders you handed her your backpack, she took hers off and placed it against the wall of the building.

“watch the pro, loser” she teased, jumping up a couple of times before finally grabbing onto the ladder causing it to slide down “here, i’ll help you up” she placed a firm hold onto your hips, picking you up which you grabbed onto the ladder and climbed up “take the bags” she threw both of the one at the time before she finally got up on the ladder “shit” she fell back as the ladder completely broke falling off its hinges and onto the floor “i’ll find a way back down” she stood up, grabbing your hands and pulling you up.

you two made it inside the building, looking around for anything useful “it’s so dark and fucking dusty in here” you commented “no shit, it’s as if this place wasn’t abandoned decades ago” she replied sarcastically causing you to hit her head lightly. walking away from where abby was you were practically squinting from how dark and quiet it was “boo!” abby grabbed your waist causing you to jump up and scream “fuck you abby, i’m gonna kill you” you hit her arm, now facing her with an angered expression.

“whaatt, it was the perfect opportunity to scare your ass” she laughed, her hands still on your waist pulling you closer to her “i’ll bite you” you looked up at her causing her to lean her head down a little to your face “i won’t scream” she whispered, the feeling of butterflies erupting in your stomach “shut up” you muttered shyly now trying to avoid her gaze “hey, look at me pretty girl” her voice was soft, her fingers gently grabbing your chin to look back at her. it was silent for a bit, abby’s thumb softly rubbing your bottom lip.

“you’re so mesmerizing” her lips finally coming in contact with yours, your hands cupping her face pulling her close as her hands gripped your waist, abby pulling away to catch her breath causing your lips to chase hers making her giggle “needy much?” she teased causing your cheeks to flush “shut up” you laugh with her.

A/U: OMG THIS WAS LONG, DO U GUYS LIKE LONGER FICS OR SHORTER ONES? I WISH TUMBLR HAD A POLL OPTION