#listen i know its old ground but honestly i fuck with the dynamic in baby its cold outside

[administer-distractions]

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[revchainsaw]

Demon Wind (1990)

Demon Wind (1990)

Greetings and blessings upon you my flock! Welcome to the Cult of Cult. I am your pastor and priest of pop culture, ordained minister of genre films, the good reverend Chainsaw McGraw. You may just call me Reverend Chainsaw. Come and accept our sacrament upon the altar of online internet reviews. Our first holy offering is an absolute treasure, 1990′s Demon Wind. An offering ripped from the blood inked pages of the Evil Dead’s Necronomicon Ex Mortis, Demon Wind is not quite an unofficial entry into the world of Ash and the Deadites, but if you have exhausted the Catalogue of Sam Raimi Horror flicks (and let’s be honest, if you’re reading a Tumblr review of Demon Wind, you probably have), then Demon Wind will scratch that itch for sure.

The Message

Our anointed offering opens upon a boarded up farm house owned by simple country occultists George and Regina Carter. There’s a Mean Girls reference to be made here. George and Regina are defending their homestead from an unseen force (A Demon Wind some might say) through a Christian/Witchcraft combination of gospel music, a set of holy daggers, and a diary full of Regina’s spells. Unfortunately it’s not very effective, and George is possessed. George kills Regina, drops a snow globe, and for some inexplicable reason the farmhouse explodes bringing the films epilogue to a close. 

With that we are brought to the year 1990 where our rag tag group of heroes converge upon the supernaturally supercharged Carter farm with one mission in mind, helping a homie sort out his shit. What a great group of friends; I can barely get the crew together for a game night but our protagonist Cory has a group of friends so tight they are willing to drop everything and drive untold miles to nowhere in particular just because he had a bad dream. Speaking of “tight” friends, of our doomed party, no friends are so tight as Chuck and Stacey, but we’ll get to that, in short order. Let us meet the fellowship of ding dongs who will battle the blustery bogeys of Demon Wind.

Cory is the star of the show. A fairly blasé everyman who’s so caught up in his chosen one journey that he can’t even bother to be slightly interesting. He is the grandchild of the oh so fetch (see I got to it) Regina/George pairing from earlier in the film. Cory is haunted by mysterious dreams, and a tragic reunion with his demented father, which draw him to the Carter farm. There is however more to meets the eye, you see Cory is from the planet Namek. Watch the movie, you’ll catch my drift. 

Elaine is Cory's girlfriend and wants nothing more than to pull her pants down in public to bring a smile to his face. 

Dell is Cory’s friend? Bully? Enemy? it’s not entirely clear. It seems Dells role in this story is to be an unabashed asshole and chauvinist to every character that interacts with him. He is also perhaps Elaine’s brother, or someone's brother. Listen, you’d have to pay wayyyy more attention than this movie warrants to parse out all the relationship dynamics in this flick. Let’s just say, Dell is here, and despite how he acts, the other characters seem to be ok with that fact.

Terri is Dell’s girlfriend and a good friend of Elaine. Despite being on the arm of a typical 80s teen flick bad guy, Terri seems to be the most eligible bachelorette on the Carter farm. Or so it may seem, but as I’ll explain later I think there is a truer love than can be expressed that really keeps Terri from leaving Dell.

Jack is a Big Ol’ Nerd. He speaks like the writers were convinced using a thesaurus was enough to convince us that the guy is existentially unfuckable. The guy is basically just Billy from Power Rangers, but instead of piloting a badass Triceratops Zord he just kids very mildly bummed when the love of his life is transformed into a very judgmental spontaneously combusting doll.

Speaking of spontaneously combusting dolls, the victim of that very unfair end is Bonnie. Bonnie clearly had way more confidence in the love of her bookish beaux than she should have. The betrayal is immense, not that Jack couldn’t save her, but just in the fact that when she meets her demise (despite the fact that he promised he’d protect her) he is not at all distraught. Poor Bonnie, she is by far the most human feeling of the cardboard cut out female protagonists in this film and she deserved better. Let’s be honest, Jack was looking for an out, and Bonnie was just too real for this movie.

And Now, without further ado, I’d like to introduce the greatest power couple in the history of B Movie Horror Cinema: Chuck and Stacy. If you think my introduction is a bit much, I promise that the film goes much further. Demon Wind begins it’s love affair with this bromance in delightfully extravagant style. There’s magic, explosions, opera, karate, beer and bunnies and a big ol middle finger to fucking Dell. Chuck had at once been romantically involved with Terri, but things went south somehow and he claims that he still holds a flame for her. Despite this continued insistence I think it’s plain to see that Chuck found comfort, magic, and a ride or die hunk in the arms of Stacey. Stacey is a suave, sharp, smooth talking guy, whose only desire in life seems to be whatever keeps Chuck around, and that seems to mean a lot of stage magic and martial arts! I could write about Chuck and Stacey all day, so I’ll move on from here.

The cast of this film is wild and honestly even the weak ones are fun to watch. There is no character on the roster who is easy to mistake for another. That is why it is so fun to watch them meet their demise and even more fun to see them return under the possession of the demon wind as oopy goopy caricatures of their human selves. And this does go on for quite awhile. Unfortunately even Chuck and Stacey are not enough to protect the surreal landscape in which they find themselves. At one point in the film a second set of friends drop by to add 2 more bodies to the massacre. Willy and Reena, a gangly set of clothing accessories who are given legs, but hey Ear Ring and Beret, I mean Willy and Reena are still fun to see torn to shreds.

The movie ultimately reveals that the madness was sparked by the fact that a cult worshipping a Demon God named Delos had actually built the homestead and the cursed ground they stand upon is the stage for the cult leader, a preacher named Anders to finally become the host of said Demon God. As interesting as that lore may sound on paper, it’s not particularly well executed, and Cory’s role to play in all of this is even more vague. All in all the 3rd act of this film feels a bit anti-climatic even if it does feature a demon superhero fight. 

All that said I’d like to move on to the next phase of our sacred liturgy. The sacred and profane, the highs and lows of this movie.

Benediction

Best Feature: What the What?

The best feature of Demon Wind has to be how bizarre it is. It throws everything it can think of at the audience. Burning Skeletons leap from Crosses, eggs that hatch into piles of worms, EXPLODING BABY DOLLS, Cow skulls with long sticky tongues made of human intestines! They certainly sacrificed logic in order to insure they provided the audience with something they haven’t seen before.

Best Kill/ effect: A Cowmen Album Cover!

The best effect in Demon Wind is also it’s best kill. while investigating a barn on the Carter property, which is full of occult symbols, animal remains, and fun Texas Chainsaw Massacre style crafts. One of the crafts catches the eye of Beret, I mean Reena. You know by her hat that she knows a thing or to about fine art. This particular piece of barn décor is a human skeleton with a cow’s skull. As she is inspecting this “beautiful” piece, what appears to be a human intestine, flies from the mouth of the cow skull and wraps around Reena like a chameleons tongue. The intestine begins to retreat into the jaw of the skull bringing Reena’s head along with it. The skull chomps down into Reena, we get a satisfyingly bloody show, and Reena’s body winds up hanging limp from its mouth. 

Second place belongs to Bonnie, but we’ve already spoken to that bizarre spectacle.

Best Scene: I Now Pronounce you Chuck and Stacey!

Chuck and Stacey enter the scene. I know I’m inconsistent in how I spell Stacey/Stacy. This scene was mentioned above and you just have to see it. Watch until Cory intervenes.

Best Character(s): Stacey Cassidy and the Sundance Chuck

Stacey is the best character in this film, but as I’m sure he wouldn’t accept this honor alone I have to make it a tie. Chuck and Stacey are just so good. Every moment they are on screen is a treasure. The introduction of these two just received the honor of best scene, but they shine as Demons and in an even longer sequence leading to their demise. They take the watch at the Carter home and from the fog emerges a t!ddy ghost, my congregants will be familiar with this sort of creature, who attempts to lure them outside. Stacey puffs up Chucks confidence calling him “John Wayne”, Chuck proposes they go on a Tahitian vacation, but Stacey wisely wary of voodoo suggests Vegas. And there you have it, these two pure good boys are surviving this flick and they are getting married in Vegas. Unfortunately, they decide to speed things up a bit, and decide that although they are not tempted by the t!ddy ghost, that they can use their karate magic to defeat the demonic hordes. They march out into the woods, but we can add the power of love to the list of things that are no use against the Demon Wind. Our best boys meet their fates together like two old west heroes, guns blazing! Oh, oh, but they come back as demons and they eat Dell, so thank God for that. 

Worst feature: I ordered these Deadites from Wish

 The villains are not particularly interesting. It’s boring, goopy, bad mouth piece demons that have appeared in hundreds of demon flicks already by this point, and it really makes you want to go back to the unexplained paranormal happenings from earlier in the movie rather than fighting these dollar store Deadites. The fact that the film leans into this in it’s third act really makes the film feel incredibly front loaded. 

Worst scene: Cory in the House

Pretty much any scene that focuses on Cory is a bit weak. He’s just not fun. He gets to transform into an anime character in the end of the film and he’s still melodramatic and boring. This is often a problem with main characters in films, the writers don’t want them to be unlikeable or too quirky so the fun parts are always the supporting cast. 

Worst Character: Dude, you’re NOT getting a Dell!

 Don’t get me wrong, I hate Dell. But Dell is a big dumb goon who is just so fun to watch suffer and act like an utter meathead, and being hateable is not the worst thing a character can be. For this reason I have to give the worst character award to Cory; for many of the reasons I spoke about above.

Summary:

How fitting that a B movie gets a B. But that’s really a great place for this movie to be. So many big Hollywood productions don’t deserve that spot. Though Demon Wind may drag in the middle, and the characters and effects may be quite corny, it is certainly not boring. Demon Wind is eye candy even though it looks so ugly. It has some of the most loveable murder lambs in the genre and one of my favorite bromances in all of cinema, If you are a fan of Gonzo Horror then Demon Wind is a must see. If you are not all that into that sort of thing I promise you’ll have a good time. I highly recommend it. 

Overall Grade: B

[margridarnauds]

ronan & olympe for the ship opinions? (also please let your previous anon know that they're the funniest person in the world and i love them)

So…interesting thing, there. And something I’ve been increasingly thinking about as I think back on my last few years of fandom, my evolving feelings towards M/F shipping, and how fandom, as a whole, treats M/F ships. I’m going to apologize in advance for the length since I KNOW you didn’t sign on for 1.5k words of reminiscence. 

Also: BEAGLE ANON, YOU’RE THE FUNNIEST PERSON IN THE WORLD. 

When I first started out with 1789, in about 2015 or so, I was actually pro-Ronan/Olympe. Like, I wanted NOTHING more than fix-it fics where they retired to the country and had babies. I listened to La Guerre Pour se Plaire for HOURS, getting caught in the gothic atmosphere and the passionate, conflicted lyrics. But, at the time, the overall fandom environment was…well. Not conducive to it. And I was young, and I wasn’t strong in my opinions yet, so I stood back and kept it to myself. I think that might be part of why I ended up backing away from 1789 when I did. Yeah, I liked it, but I didn’t have a strong sense of community, and most of the attention, at that time, was in the Mozart, L’Opera fandom, and I wasn’t a major picture there. I attended streams, yeah, but I wasn’t a CONTENT creator, and it was easy for me to fade into the background, I think. Maybe because I was too afraid to be a content creator, back then, because that would involve possibly expressing my own opinions. I accepted that Ronan/Olympe was No bad, terrible, awful based on that desire to fit in, because it was so much EASIER. Just like I accepted that French 1789 was a disaster, that MOR was much better, and that, really, it wasn’t worth the effort. Just an inferior musical. (The problem, of course, was that I NEVER liked MOR as well as I liked 1789. Maybe it’s better put together, but I don’t ENJOY it as much, and imo it drags quite a bit at a few places, a problem shared by its German counterpart.) 

I came back to 1789 around…2017, with the European Musicals Streaming event, with the Takarazuka one totally stealing my heart, specifically Lazare/Ronan. Suddenly, I was IN, and I was creating content. Yeah, most of the French musicals fandom didn’t give a flying fuck that I was creating content, with most of my support coming from my friends and Takarazuka fans, but I was CREATING CONTENT, for the first time since I joined fandom. I was finally starting to figure out my way in fandom, finally starting to get noticed. In 2018……..for reasons I won’t give out, at least publicly, there was a massive rift in the old French musicals fandom, a lot of bridges got burned, and, naturally, I was far enough from the fire. But this DID give me a shot at carving out my own 1789 experience, for once, without them hanging over my shoulder. I do think that the reason why the 1789 fandom’s as strong as it is now is because of that rift, because it left a sort of power vacuum. Suddenly, there was a space for other French musicals, and we didn’t have to worry about the constant comparison to MOR. BUT. Keep in mind. 2-3 years ago, the overwhelming consensus on Ronan was pure, unadulterated hatred. There were a few Ronan content creators in an already small pool, but the general consensus was that Lazare was better in every way and Ronan was a terrible protagonist.  (I know fully well that some old members of the French musicals fandom, to this day, won’t engage with Ronan content. At all. And I can say this as openly as I do because I KNOW they don’t follow me.) As a Peyronan shipper, I was in an awkward place, especially as time went on and I realized that I actually did like the little shit. One half of my OTP was absolutely beloved, one half was hated, and, while there was definitely some content on the Tumblr side of things (I definitely did NOT single-handedly invent the ship out of thin air, I don’t take credit for it, and I’m grateful to everyone who kind of. Took me in), the fan fiction side of things still tended to lean Ronan/Olympe. If, today, it seems like the fandom consensus is Ronan/Lazare, that’s because I fought tooth and nail to get my own place in the fandom. 

I…suppose you could say that I justified my place in the fandom by tossing Ronan/Olympe under the bus. It was easier, that way. It meant that I could forge alliances with anyone who wanted Solène/Olympe instead, though I was still on dangerous ground since I still wanted precious Lazare with Ronan, and, of course, the show would be better without Ronan. (You’ll note that the VERY FIRST fic I ever published on AO3 was Solène/Olympe. Why? Because I knew it would be a safe option to test the waters. That. And I really did just write it the night before my GRE.) But, at least I wasn’t a Ronan/Olympe shipper, right? I was safely gay. (Biphobia, thy name is fandom.) When I talked about Ronan, I talked about him as gay, I talked shit about Ronan/Olympe whenever I had the chance. All properly tagged, of course, in the proper channels. I’ve never been the sort to actively hurt someone who DID ship it, I just took pains to not associate myself with the Icky Het Ship. When I talked about Ronan, I talked about him as GAY, VERY GAY, not a hint of bisexuality to him. Because if he was bi, that might mean that Ronan/Olympe had a leg to stand on, you see? You’ll note that, to this day, I almost never acknowledge Ronan/Olympe as a thing that HAPPENED in any given fic continuities, because it was so much easier if he simply fell into Lazare’s arms instead. Wiping that little spot clean. And. Well. Here I am. About 5 years after I first got into 1789. And, looking back, I wonder if it was REALLY that bad, or if I just nodded my head because it was easy at the time, since it’s only been in the last year that I really, really began to develop my own spine. (Honestly, props to Marie Antoinette the Musical and, specifically, Morléans as a ship for that one.) For the most part, I’m proud of how far the fandom’s come in the last five years, and I’m proud of the work that I, individually, have done to help get it there, whether it was streams, gifs, or fanfics. But sometimes, I do worry that anyone coming in who ships Ronan/Olympe, like I used to…might feel out of place, and I never want to treat them like I was treated back in the day. 

Do I ship it? Not really. That ship’s sailed for me (I didn’t mean to make that a pun but here we are). I’m fairly firmly Lazare/Ronan and Solène/Olympe (though I’m not as firmly pro-the latter as the former, simply because I REALLY don’t have as much material to go off of there.) Not just because of the old pressure, but just because…looking at it in, say, the French cast…there’s really no chemistry there. At all. The Takarazuka Olympe looks mildly terrified to be in Ronan’s presence at any given moment. I DO actually kind of like it in the Toho production, especially with Teppei Koike and Sayaka Kanda, since the two of them fit together SO naturally and their voices are like two pieces of the same puzzle, but I’m not sure it’s something I’d particularly want to create content for. In fact, when I tried to write Ronan/Lazare/Olympe as an OT3, my HARDEST dynamic to write and justify was Ronan/Olympe. I do think that “La Guerre Pour se Plaire” is a stunning song, musically, it’s probably one of my favorite French musical songs. I do kind of tend to see Ronan as gay, simply because Takarazuka Ronan in particular is………..forceful, to the point that I can see him forcing himself to believe he’s in love with Olympe in order to distract himself from Lazare. I feel like the French cast, while arguably realistic in it showing Ronan/Olympe’s relationship having problems, also shows a couple that, really, beyond the physical attraction, couldn’t have made it work had both of them survived. And I feel like fandom, back in the day, was far too willing to take Olympe’s side over Ronan’s in that dispute, ignoring how Olympe’s own relationship to her side of the conflict is…kind of toxic to her. And while Ronan went about it in an ass-backward way (“I will kill your friends and family! To remind you of my love!”)……..he did make some Points. And Toho Ronan/Olympe, particularly Teppei/Sayaka, are more two kids in love who just want to give it a shot. (Kato Kazuki/Nene Yumesaki were more….forceful, manly hero/prim and proper governess with a spine of steel. Which is OKAY, but not really personally as interesting to me.) I do give the Toho credit for really, really making me see that, okay, it might not be for me, but it CAN work on stage. Mostly. (I still hate that forced kiss.) 

 I will say that there are times where I find myself writing Lazare rather similarly to Olympe in terms of him going through the same feelings of guilt, shame, and duty, and I’m just like “....hm. What have I really changed? Did I just substitute Lazare’s face for Olympe because it was easier? Or copied the existing dynamic and pasted a dude’s face over Olympe’s?” (I do think that there are definitely DIFFERENCES to Olympe VS Lazare, it’s just...eerie in those individual moments.) I do think, at the end of the day, the story of forbidden love during the French Revolution....we’ve HAD it before, in the La Revolution Française musical, and in my opinion it does work best as a queer narrative. And, unfortunately, Ronan/Olympe just...isn’t developed particularly well enough on stage to justify it as an EPIC ROMANCE. 

Overall, I think that I’m fairly settled in my ways at this point, but I also don’t hate it to the extent that I once did. It’ll never be my favorite, I can’t really see them getting married and having kids, and, frankly, the relationship just isn’t as interesting to me as the alternatives since we’ve SEEN it played out on screen, and I can’t really see myself making content for it or really engaging with it in any meaningful way outside of reblogging gifsets/reading fics, but like. I don’t HATE it anymore. I’m neutral to its existence. And, when it comes down to it, I have read fic/engaged in content for it, because, at this point, it’s STILL part of my favorite musical. If I could have done things differently….maybe I would have stayed with it more, for longer. Maybe I’d have written that happy country babyfic (you know. In 18th century France. Where raising babies in the country was so painless). Maybe I’d have gone over to Peyronan earlier and not looked back. Maybe I would have written Ronan more consciously as a bisexual man instead of a gay man. Who knows? Maybe I’m just a tired bitch these days and so am hyper-dissecting everything. But I definitely never want anyone coming into the fandom to think there isn’t a place for them just because they ship Ronan/Olympe. 

[toddsfall]

Let’s talk about Star Wars

SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS (don’t say I didn’t warn you)

first off, the entire cast looked like a DELICIOUS SNACC PACK if you were attracted to any of them before and are wondering if they have somehow become more attractive the answer is yes. Yes they have. 

Rose is awesome, I love her (even though I have Thoughts about her storyline, more on that later) and if I see one more racist motherfucker on Twitter try to bend themselves over backwards trying to justify calling her ‘the worst character ever in SW’, ‘unattractive and fat’, ‘the worst part of the movie’ I am personally pulling the plug on the internet. Same goes for anyone trying to hate on Finn, y’all are really transparent and IT’S FUCKING GROSS. YOU RACIST ASSHOLES.

Hmm so anyway, I have a lot of thoughts and most of them will be rambly so come along this ride with me friends (I swear I’ll try to make clear & concise points)

Okay so I want to go right off the bat say that I have loved Star Wars since I was a wee babbie so I’m? going to? love it? always? so yeah, I know I’m biased (but honestly who isn’t? everyone reviewing the movie has their own biases attached to it sooo deal with it) 

The movie starts off with several action sequences which immediately pull us into the story, they got my heart racing from minute one and I was here for it. Also, I got goosebumps the minute I saw Leia/Carrie’s face and I stayed pretty emotional throughout the entirety of the movie. I think they gave her the respect she deserved, her legacy really shined through in every single one of her scenes (and her scenes were among the most memorable in the movie imo)

I loved how much the movie focused on characters. This was a story about people; 

how they can fuck up and fall off their pedestal (Luke); 

try their hardest and still fail someone (Leia and Han failed Ben, it’s sad but it’s true); 

how they can overcome their past and choose the light over and over (Rey was the main focus but Finn and Rose were definitely part of this theme as well); 

how they can feel completely abandoned and isolated and  become completely unhinged, unable to overcome their past and become completely bitter (Kylo Ren/Ben, listen I am not trying to sound like I approve of his actions but I really like how the movie delved into HOW people can become ‘the villain’ in a story, it was an unflinching take on how someone can have very legitimate reasons for becoming the way they am and it still in the end not justifying their actions at all. Idk, other people probably have a take different take on this but I for one found it kind of refreshing). 

This movie really delved into how heroes are people too, everyone fucks up. Everyone. Even the best among us. And we don’t all handle it so well (aka Luke completely abandoning everyone he’s ever loved to die, you could argue that was a pretty egocentric move and maybe that seems out of character - ask yourself if you’ll be the same person you’re now in 30 years now, especially if the current political climate keeps matching the pretty horrifying ones in sw- but it shows how disillusioned he’d become). 

However, in the end it felt to me like hope was still there. All these people, who have lost so much and who have fucked up in various ways (Finn wanting to abandon the rebellion, Poe leading them into a defeat, Leia failing her son, Rey possibly considering joining Kylo?/the darkness, Luke see above) still choose to stand up for what’s right. I know people thought the ending was a bit too cheesy (and I will come back to how choosing this ending will probably end up costing them later) but I loved it. I don’t know about you guys, but movies don’t always have to choose the dark route to end up good for me? Like, sometimes I just want to be entertained and escape into another world where it’s possible for heroes to be flawed but ultimately still good? maybe just me though.

So that’s what I loved most about the movie. Some of my fave scenes: (and I’m sure I’m forgetting some?)

I loved Kylo and Rey’s scenes (because heyyy they have similar experiences and yet are polar opposites, their dynamic has really grown on me! I don’t want them to end up together romantically but their climax will probably be the most interesting villain/hero confrontation in a while - that’s just my opinion thooo-) the scene in the rain, the hand touching and the fight in Snoke’s room were so emotionally charged I liveee

As I said, I loved Leia’s scenes (especially with Poe, god I wish we’d get more of that dynamic but :((( ) the scene with Luke at the end, not gonna lie that one got to me (I mean, it was going to be emotional bc of Carrie anyway but the weight of those last scenes, honest to god chills)

the scene where Admiral Holdo flies into the command ship was fucking MAGNIFICENT seriously, the silence? the visuals? fuck.

I want to go into a really detailed analysis of how the use of old motifs and themes from previous movies in the score carried a lot of the emotional weight forward, but I’d have to watch/listen to the movie again to fully carry that out with the respect it deserves so maybe another time. Just mentioning it because it’s still one of my favorite star wars things (and I know it’s said so many times before but you know what? the music is so good, it should still be mentioned in every single review. don’t do john williams dirty like this) it’s very subtle at times, but I swear I heard some of Darth Vader’s iconic march come through in Luke’s score in this movie? very interesting!! pls let me geek out over music internet I’m begging you

I already mentioned Snoke’s throne room but the moment you see Kylo deciding to kill him is glorious too (props to Adam Driver, seriously you can hate Kylo and I totally understand but attacking the actor - especially when it’s based on his looks, which most of you are wrong about jsyk I don’t make the rules, it’s just science his eyes look like a baby deer?? - is so unnecessary please don’t stoop to the level of those dudebros on twitter attacking rose? like, Kylo has enough bad deeds on his resumé it’s okay you can attack him for that, you don’t need to drag his looks into it so annyyywaay sorry for that tangent it just irks me)

BB8 being the reason while basically any of the resistance is still alive is so fucking funny I’m sorry if you hate it I love my dumb orange cat robot (the reunion with Poe? cleansed my entire soul)

Finn towering over Phasma and spitting out ‘rebel scum’ is Good and should not be forgotten also, speaking of good acting? the way John conveys the inner conflict Finn is going through so subtly is probably going to go unnoticed BUT IT IS GOOD AND I’M GOING TO SHOUT AT Y’ALL ABOUT HOW MUCH HE 5AND DAISY° HAVE GROWN TILL YOU GET IT THROUGH YOUR SKULLS

if we’re talking about Iconique scenes, the man licking the ground and saying ‘Salt’ was fucakfmlkdj so funny I can’t explain how fucking funny that was 

I’m not going to dwell too much on what I didn’t like because I believe there is such a thing as analyzing something to death and I don’t want to do that (besides, it’s really not hard to find criticism for this movie. People really out there comparing it to the Phantom Menace? Lies. Y’all really hate this movie huh? Too bad, I was thoroughly entertained and I loved it  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯)

I feel like most of my problems with the movie could have been solved with some changes to the plot. The critiques I agree with are

 the pacing was weird (how long was Rey on that island? it didn’t seem to be that much longer than the entire plot and subplots of the rebels trying to escape the ship, but that was at most like 20 hours sooo) 

the plot was pretty straightforward: conflict-resolution, conflict-resolution, conflict-resolution. I would have liked to have seen this shaken up a bit. The movie could still have focused on characters with higher stakes, more unresolved issues, messier plots. It was a bit too neat. I saw most of the ‘twists’ coming (e.g. kylo killing snoke, boy they really layed it on thick there) except for: leia charging in and shooting poe (heyoo that’s cinema baby), luke actually still being on the island (and something else but I’m completely blanking rn!)

 I think that’s why people don’t like the ending, it’s too neatly wrapped up in a bow (ignoring the fact that there are like 10 rebels left now? that’s seems like uuuh a problem) And while I like it from an emotional resolution point of view, I think the the movie could have done with more tension at the end. More tension, to keep you on the edge of your seat, wanting to immediately see the next movie. that was its biggest flaw imo

and finally - fair warning: I’m conflicted about this- Rose and Finn’s plot. Hooo boy, okay. So, I wanna say that I love them as characters but.. I don’t really want them to get together? idk remove all forced romance from your plot, writers. It will really help unclutter your stories I swear. (that said, I wouldn’t mind them in a relationship as long as it���s not to create tension with rey? or like any love triangle at all. Please leave that garbage at the door). Aside from that, I know people think their plot was the worst of the movie and I don’t think that. However, I think they could have done more with it. Shown more conflict! let Finn be the spark (and he is!! fight me!!) but also conflicted about joining the rebellion. Let Rose be completely torn up about her sister and let her be bitter dammit! They could have used more obstacles, their plot seemed mostly resolved by a deus ex machina (aside from Finn fighting Phasma - who I’m kind of wishing he didn’t kill cause I can sense she has sooo much more in her, honestly Hux is 100 times more boring, you have gwendoline RIGHT THERE FUCKERS USE HER) I didn’t mind the exposition of the filthy rich people planet (YESSS EAT THE RICH STAR WARS PLS SHIT ON THEM AS MUCH AS YOU CAN) but it just lacked.. spark. I hope their plot turns out to be important for the next movie, otherwise it was sadly something that could have been much greater (and it’s really uncomfortable to introduce two main poc characters and then basically have them contribute nothing to the main plot, hmm okay star wars I’m watching you)

I can’t/don’t have the energy to address everyone’s issues, but mostly I don’t agree with people being mad about characters (I think it’s clear I like the direction they’ve taken with most of them), the humour is a bit disneyfied but I really didn’t mind (it’s clear as day some of those cutesy aliens were in there for the money, money, money but like.. it be like that sometimes), I honestly don’t care about Snoke so I wasn’t disappointed his backstory was not a part of this, Rey NOT being a part of the great history before her is important to me (can’t believe I didn’t mention it with my favorite scenes, really regretting that salt guy now) even if they try to backpedal on it later that moment was beautiful in the movie (my space daughter isn’t important in the grand scheme of things but she so iiiiiis!!). All in all, I really liked it. It’s not my favorite movie (not even my favorite star wars movie) but it was damn entertaining! Here’s to hoping that the next movie will be the opposite of this very tight, contained movie. Give me the intergalactic class revolution I deserve (seriously, I hope that’s what Rose and Finn’s adventure was planting? might be idle hope, and I’m trying to keep my expectations low but it would be pretty cool right?)

[skittymon]

Top five Fruitshipping moments. Cause I want to see a good show don't tell relationship and we have plenty of moments to fill a large variety of these lists.

Oh god just 5??? Okay I got this be still my heart

5. Episode 2, Yuzu and Yuya’s action duel

Okay I know this is pretty early in the series and it can be seen as platonic, but you get so much character from this scene and grounds of a solid friendship between them. Like:

Yuzu’s getting shit because she was rude to Yuya like some of the fandom does to her lol but instead she just goes with it.

Like at this point of the story we now know both Yuya and Yuzu are entertainers, and now we get to see them doing what they love together and how they work off each other.

Not to mention this scene is funny as hell. Like wow it’s just showing us two cuties performing together (granted it’s not perfect because Yuya’s in funk atm) and I already fell for their dynamic at this point and its only ep 2. 

ALSO they fucking used Plain Plain (where this duel took place) in episode 141 to rip my god damn heart out and to show this duel had meaning and we should realize that we’re missing Yuzu.

4. Yuya is PISSED/cry baby (eps 50 + 51)

At this point in the show we’ve gotten a good basis on their relationship. Yuya and Yuzu are childhood friends with the same goal and they inspire each other to become stronger. Pretty standard and honestly nothing new.

And then they get separated.

Like I did NOT expected them to act the way they did when this happened (at least Yuya because when has a main protag ever cared that much for the female protag minus Anzu from season 0)

I am 98% sure that this is the first time Yuya has cried openly to people without his goggles AND ITS CAUSE OF YUZU. This boy has hidden his emotions about his dad, his bullying, and pendulum summoning but Yuzu’s apparent capture is what got Yuya to finally show his sadness and not cover them with jokes and his goggles.

Yuya as we know, when he’s not berserker, is a pacifist but he’s going out of character because he’s so mentally distraught and sad. Like the only person I would get like that for is my twin so to me this speaks volumes since Yuya values Yuzu’s well being over his own values.  

And then in Yugioh it’s a known thing that the female protags most times stay on the side line and cheer on the main protag AND THEYRE ACTUALLY ACKNOWLEDGING IT AND IT’S SUPER IMPORTANT TO YUYA. Like apparently Yuma’s says something similar to Kotori near the end of Zexal but I’m not there yet but like this is ep 50 compared to 140-something.

Looking back this is super important. Like when Zarc got revived he stated he was surprised/thrilled that there was more to Pendulum Summoning than he first thought (combining all the three methods w/ it) and the reason Yuya was able to do it was because of Yuzu. He was able to go beyond Zarc’s expectations and plans BECAUSE OF YUZU.

God when has a main protag screamed out a female protags name like that before in yugioh??? 

Yuzu is also a cry baby three episodes down the line.

3. Yuzu saves Yuya from Zarc

It speaks volumes when nearly all your friends (including your bff THE MAN Gonzengaka) can’t save from Satan, but the moment you say one sentence to you, you regain some control.

Like god, I love their relationship. Zarc and Ray are literally trying to destroy the other but these two can break through their previous lives soul’s to communicate with one another cause of how god damn much they mean to each other.

Listen if you go across DIMENSIONS to get save someone in Yugioh YOU KNOW your ship is real (Spiritshipping and Keyshipping being the other prime examples). But like in my fruitshipping video (which ya’ll should watch) this moment is when I used the lyrics ‘no distance can ever keep us apart’ because WOW dimensions AND demonic/angelic possessions isn’t enough sever the bond between these two.

Also my otp tag.

2. Yuya summons Odd-Eyes Raging Dragon

Lowkey this moment is up so high because Yuya’s just fucking amazing in this scene. Like Zarc’s influence is getting stronger but like LIST OF THINGS THAT HAVE CAUSED YUYA SO GO BERSERKER 

-Ep 39 with Zarc’s trigger words and Yuya didn’t even remember it

-Yuto’s memories of being attacked the Academia 

-Being electrocuted in the god damn brain

-Being in the same area as all four boys that causes a hole to open in the sky

-Creepy old guys touching Yuzu

Like one of these things is not like the other lol

Seriously though, the others are near close to psychological torture and PTSD but someone touching Yuzu inappropriately invokes the same amount of rage from Yuya. THATS A HUGE ASS COMPARISON. Also the scene was gorgeous god damn.

1. Yuzu inspires Yuya during Friendship Cup

Okay this moment…THIS is when Fruitshipping went from a casual ship to god damn otp for me.

So for the past couple eps, Yuya has been feeling like shit (ground facility, losing Jack, missing Yuzu), of course Yuzu doesn’t know some of bad shit that’s going on, but goddamit the citrus is going to show the tomato that she’s okay.

Like dueling for other people is nothing new to yugioh but holy SHIT

Of course Yuzu doesn’t know the cost of losing, but all she wants to do is make Yuya feel at ease (which the poor boy hasn’t felt in so long fuck)

Yuzu hasn’t spoken to Yuya this entire arc but she knows how he’s feeling right now. She knows Yuya. This just furthers the belief that they’ve known each other for so god damn long and are ‘irreplaceable’ to one another.

Look at how goddamn surprised he is. Like instead of worrying about herself, she’s worried about him?? Granted this might have to do with Yuya’s self worth issues And as the duel goes on, it’s not just her feelings she trying to convey to Yuya (hot-blooded and shivers). Instead of ‘oh look it’s your love-interest’s feelings’ she shows that everyone from back in Standard are also with Yuya.

ALSO THEY PLAYED YUYA’S THEME DURING THIS GOD. EVEN THE OST’S ARE SHOWING US THEIR RELATIONSHIP.

LOOK AT HOW GOD DAMN HAPPY HE IS. LIKE WHEN HAS THIS BOY EVER CRIED FROM JOY SO FAR IN THIS SHOW. THIS IS DEVELOPMENT THAT HE SHOULDN’T HIDE HIS EMOTIONS AND SHOULD EMBRACE THEM AHH.

Just…fuck me.