#lilli waffles

[starry-eyed-wild-child]

no lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the outhouse to the church until the commune knows his name bro

[disneyanddisneyships]

Human aponi x demon alastor where he’s haunting her apartment

Lilly: *reading and minding her business*

…..

………

Alastor: LILLIAN, I WANT WAFFLE FRIES—

Aponi: I ALREADY GOT YOU FRIES YESTERDAY

[metallicamunson]

Boyfriend(James Potter x FemReader)

Hi everyone, I finally finished this fic after months of starting it. It’s not my best work but it’s not too shabby considering I haven’t written in a while. Hope you guys enjoy this song inspired fic 🥲🤍

Word Count: 3,099

Warnings: Angst to Fluff, some cursing.

Summary: One where you and James find your way back to each other

——-

If there is one thing you and James are good at, it’s getting under one another’s skin.

It didn’t matter that your relationship ended in your seventh year at Hogwarts. Having the same friend group means seeing each other constantly. Not to mention, the breakup was a mutual decision, deeming that it would be best to be friends while you both figured out what came after school.

Looking back, you can’t help but feel it was a stupid decision. A brash agreement made by two teenagers in love, scared to take the next step in their relationship.

You very much still love James Potter.

And James Potter is still very much in love with you.

Although- neither of you knows it.

Meanwhile, your friends watch from the sidelines, waiting for either of you to make the first move to rekindle your romance.

DATE ONE (James)

It all started when the marauders invited the whole group for brunch. They all sat around the table on the balcony of their home, enjoying fluffy waffles with various fruits spread over the table. You couldn’t help but sneak glances toward James; he looked good. The white T-shirt he wore- accentuated his muscular arms, and his waist in those trousers was a look to die for.

You bit your lip in embarrassment when you caught Remus’ gaze; his eyebrows raised and a knowing smirk on his lips. You shook your head, taking a long sip of your champagne.

“Word on the street is that Prongs got himself a date tonight,” Sirius says, nudging James in the ribs with an elbow.

Now that- caught the attention of everyone, especially yours. Your eyes met with James’ who looked like a deer caught in headlights. He let out an awkward cough, twisting the ring on his middle finger.

“Uh- yeah, it’s a girl I met the other day at a coffee shop.”

It suddenly felt like your intestines were twisting into knots as jealousy consumed your now racing heart.

“That’s great, James,” Marlene smiles; she can’t help but look over at you. “What's her name?”

“Hannah, but it’s nothing serious,” he quickly adds, “it might not even go anywhere.”

“Well, you better bloody make sure she has a good time- she’s fine as f-, ow what the hell!” Sirius glares at Lilly, who just kicked him under the table.

“Okay- enough talk about James’ lov-”

“I’m happy for you; I hope you have a splendid time with what’s her face,” you chirp, lips settling into a tight smile. “Maybe this time around, you’ll get the first date right.”

Now that stung, you always assured James that you loved your first date despite the minor- okay, major hic-ups along the way. Truth be told you- love it; you found him adorable when he attempted to fix everything. He thought you’d never want to see him again, but imagine his surprise when you kissed him at the end of your date.

“Her name is Hanna- Lilly; stop doing that!” Sirius exclaims, kicking her back.

“I know you did not just kick me, Sirius Black!” Lilly says, throwing a grape in his direction.

“Will you two stop acting like children,” Remus sighs, “now let's all take a deep breath-”

“You know what, I will have a great time with Hannah! I might take her to that little Italian restaurant with the good breadsticks!” James says, shooting a terse smile your way.

That’s yours and James’ place. The place you both first said, ‘I love you.’

“Sounds like a lovely idea.” You scoot your chair back, throwing your napkin on your plate. “You know what, I forgot I have an errand to run. Thank you for brunch, boys. Bye, everyone.”

You take your bag from the handle of your chair, exiting through the sliding door.

James groans, leaning his forehead against his fist with his eyes closed.

Later that night

“You know what, I’m happy for him. I’m sure he and Helen will make a great couple,” you murmur, pacing back and forth.

“Hannah.” Marlene corrects before shrinking back when you raise your eyebrow at her.

“(Y/n) Why won’t you admit it; you still love him!” Lilly sighs, sitting up from her spot on your bed.

“Me? Lilly, please, we both agreed our breakup was for the best. I’m fine with it.”

“Your eye twitched when you said that.” Marlene laughed.

“It did not,” you lift your hand to your eye. You lay down between the two girls, staring at the ceiling of your room. “Okay, maybe it hurt a little when he said he was taking her to our spot.”

“Oh, sweetie, I’m sure he wouldn’t do that to you,” Marlene says with a sympathetic smile.

“I don’t even know why I care; we broke up almost a year ago. One of us dating was bound to happen.”

—

It turns out Hannah was someone who liked to move fast. James couldn’t have made a faster excuse to leave when she mentioned what names he’d want for their baby.

You would be lying if you said you didn’t feel ecstatic when Remus told you.

DATE ONE (Y/n)

“I’m sorry, I could have sworn I heard you say (Y/n) has a date with Caleb.” James laughs, walking into the kitchen where Remus and Sirius sit around the island. “You know the number of times he put the moves on her when we were dating; he should give it up.”

“Erm Prongs, I did say exactly that,” Remus chuckles nervously.

James stood still, the fridge wide open; his mind went completely blank for a few seconds. His grip on the handle tightened, grabbing the milk before slamming the fridge door shut.

“Are you okay, mate? I know this is the first date she’s been on since you two broke up.” Sirius slides a bowl across the island towards James.

“I’m fine. (Y/n) doesn’t owe me anything.” He shakes the cereal aggressively into his bowl. “I’m happy for her.”

Remus and Sirius share a look; they know for a fact that he is not okay.

A few days later

You knocked on the door of the marauders, your other hand holding a basket of pastries you made for them. A few seconds later, the door opens.

“Oh, hey.” James smiles, moving to the side to let you in.

You nod your head as a greeting, handing him the basket. “I thought I’d drop these off- Remus has been nagging me to make him my ‘famous brownies.’ I um- also made a few scones in there, or whatever,” you mumble.

You made scones, his favorite. He can’t help but grin; why does his heart feel like it is about to beat out of his chest?

“I smell brownies!” Remus runs down the spiral stairs, snatching the basket from James and rummaging through it. “Why are two just standing there- we have a couch, you know?”

James rolls his eyes, gesturing for you to move into the living room. “How did you smell brownies- your room is at the end of the hall upstairs.”

“You seem to forget about my werewolf capabilities.” Remus points out, moaning when he takes a bite of the brownie. “How’d your date go?”

James visibly tenses, staring at the side of your face. You shift in your seat, picking at your nails. “It went well. He treated me well, paid for dinner, and made me laugh.”

Remus nods in approval, though he can’t help but feel he jumped the bullet, bringing it up with James in the room.

James felt himself spiraling. What he said next wasn’t his finest moment.

“It seems kind of desperate going out with a guy who follows you around like a puppy.”

“What the hell is that supposed to mean, James,” your head snaps in his direction, a frown now evident on your face.

“I don’t know; I just think he’s a loser- anyone who goes out with him must not have very high standards.”

Your eyes brim with tears, so this is what he thought of you. “You know what, fuck you, James Potter,” you scoff, “I’ll have you know he is not a loser- he's a gentleman!”

“He’s creepy (Y/n); the man borderline stalks you!” James laughs in disbelief.

“You know what, I don’t have to listen to this!” You exclaim, flinging a pillow in his direction. You turn to Remus, “I’ll call you later tonight- I can’t be around,” you gesture with your hands towards James, “him.”

You stomp your way out of their house, slamming the door shut.

“That was a dick move,” Remus says, taking another brownie from the basket.

“I’m looking after her!” James sighs, hugging the pillow to his chest.

“Are you sure it’s not because you’re in love with her and got jealous,” he looks over at James.

“What! No! Pshh, our breakup was mutual, remember?”

“Uh-hm, sure, keeping living in denial, prongs.” Remus takes the basket from the coffee table, heading towards the stairs.

“She brought those for all of us, you know!” James shouts from his spot on the couch. He rolls his eyes with a small smile when he hears Remus running up the stairs.

—

James was right. But you’d run around naked in negative-degree weather before admitting that- out loud.

DATE TWO (James)

You found out about his second date through Marlene this time around. It was some girl he ran into at the gym. According to Marlene, she was the one to ask him out, which intrigued James.

You were okay with it. Totally completely fine.

“Do you know where they’re going?” You say, trying to sound nonchalant, flipping through the channels of Marlene’s TV.

“Sirius said they were going bowling.”

“Cool.”

You throw the remote beside you, your mind not focusing on anything but James. Ever since you went on your date with Caleb, the bickering between the both of you only intensified. The two of you could not be in the same room with each other without one or the other making a snide remark.

“Are you okay?”

“Mmhm, he’s a single man; he can do what he wants,” you murmur, tugging the blanket under your chin.

—

“So how’s it going between gym girl and James?” you murmur, sectioning Sirius’ hair in half to start braiding two braids.

“I don’t know, he hasn’t talked about it much,” he shrugs.

You frown; this could mean one of two things. They either hit it off and are keeping their relationship a secret. Or it went so bad that James refuses to speak about it.

“Ow! I would still like to have my hair intact after this love.”

“Sorry, I just have a lot on my mind,” you chuckle nervously, scratching his scalp softly.

“He talks about you a lot, you know.”

Sirius glances up at you, a knowing look in his eyes.

“I- we can’t stand each other. We can’t even have a normal conversation before an argument starts.”

“(Y/n), I love you, so when I say this, it’s with all the love in the world- you and James need to get your heads out of your arses and talk about it.”

—

You stand before the boys’ apartment; you raise your knuckles towards the door before pulling back. You’ve been standing here for five minutes- trying to find the courage to speak to your ex-lover. Do you still love him? Of course- you do. Why else would it hurt so much when he goes on these dates? What if he tells you he doesn’t want the same?

You shake your head, taking a deep breath before knocking on the wooden door. You rock on your heels, biting your lip nervously.

The door opens, revealing a woman who is the definition of a Vogue magazine model. She has straight blond hair, she definitely seems like she works out, and the band tee she wears- wait a minute.

Your breath hitches once you recognize it; you’ve worn that shirt one too many times after spending the night with James. You can feel the lump in your throat start to form.

“Hey, are you okay?” The blond asks, worry laced in her tone.

“Oh! Sorry, I got the wrong apartment,” you smile tightly, turning to walk away.

Yeah, James Potter definitely moved on, you thought.

DATE TWO (Y/N)

“He’s a good guy! Come on (Y/n), let me set this up!”

“I don’t know if I’m ready for another date- Lils, the last one was a total disaster,” you murmur.

“To be fair, we did warn you that Caleb wasn’t a good idea- plus it’s been five months,” Lilly hums, poking your cheek.

You bat her hand away, sending a playful glare her way, “Fine.”

“You won’t regret it! I promise Mason is worth it!” Lilly squeals, clapping her hands together.”

—

Lilly was right- he’s perfect.

Mason Moriarty has a great job at the ministry that pays him a hefty number of galleons. His smile is one that would make all the girls swoon. He’s the kind of guy who holds the door and respects women.

He made you laugh and paid attention to what you were saying. Mason Moriarty was respectful and made you feel comfortable.

One date turned into two, and two turned into three.

He was perfect- so what was that nagging feeling in your heart?

—

Word spreads fast in the friend group. So it came as no surprise that James got word about you and Mason.

“Who even is that guy- he seems like a tosser,” James grunts, bringing his beer can to his lips. “I mean, she can do so much better!”

Sirius rolls his eyes, putting his book down. He couldn’t get any reading done with James’ constant outbursts.

“He’s a cool dude, he treats our (Y/n/n) well.” Sirius reaches over the coffee table to get himself a can. “At least pretend to be happy for her.”

“I can be happy for her! I just think he isn’t the one for her! The guy’s last name is Moriarty, (Y/n) Moriarty, sounds stupid!” James groans, throwing his head back on the couch.

“Enlighten me then, James- who should she be with then,” Sirius quirks an eyebrow.

“I don’t-” James sighs in frustration, “(Y/n) deserves someone who will love her unconditionally, someone who will cut the crust of her sandwich because she hates the texture. She needs someone who will hold her hand when she sees a pigeon because; for some odd reason, she finds them terrifying. It needs to be someone who will run to the nearest pharmacy to grab medicine when she’s sick because god knows she won’t go to the doctor’s office.” James rants, pulling at his hair.

“And Mason can’t do that?” Sirius pushes, a smirk forming on his lips, one he tries to hide with his hands.

That was the final straw.

“No Padfoot! Moriarty can never love her the way that I do!” James blurts out, throwing his empty can on the floor.

James’ eyes widen in realization, mouth opening, and closing with no words.

“Bingo! What are you going to do about it, Potter?”

“Nothing, there’s no way she still feels the same.”

“Wrong,” Remus waltzed into the room, sitting next to James, “You two are so in love with each other it’s sickening.”

James shakes his head in confusion, his heart racing at the possibility.

“I mean, for fucks sake, Prongs, are you blind?”

“I’m an idiot,” James groans, running his hands down his face. “Fuck, what if I’m too late.”

“I heard from a little birdy, that she cut it off with Mason.” Remus hums, a smile tugging on his lips.

James practically jumps up from his spot, an unsure look on his face.

“Go get your girl James.”

The Reconciliation

You squint your eyes, slipping on your slippers, the constant knocking on your door waking you from your slumber. You pause at the threshold of your bedroom, taking a vase from your desk. Warily, you look into the peephole of your door, sighing in relief when you see James. You open the door, a million thoughts running through your head.

“James, what- it’s two in the morning; what are you doing here?”

“I’m still in love with you,” James rushes out before he chickens out.

Your eyes widen, lips parting, “What-”

“I know this is coming out of nowhere, but I need you to know how I feel. I know it’s selfish, and Mason is in the picture- or not, I don’t know, Remus said he wasn’t. Anyway- I don’t think you ever left my mind (Y/n) from the day we broke up. I felt this void within me. The dates I went on felt wrong- it felt like somehow I was betraying you,” He chuckles breathly. “And when I found out you were starting to date, I was jealous- god that sounds immature. The point is, I thought our breakup was for the best- but (Y/n) I think I was just scared that I was falling more in love with you. I still love you, and I don’t know if I’m making a fool- out of myself- but I know I had to try and fight for you.”

“James-” you whisper, your lower lip trembling, tears welling in your eyes, “I love you.” You wrap your arms around his neck, careful with the vase in your hand. “I missed you so much, I know we were never really apart, yet you felt so far away.”

“Yeah, I know the feeling,” James laughs, his arms find home around your waist.

“We’re fools,” You giggle, “We should have never broken up, I was only kidding myself by thinking I would ever get over you, Jamie.”

“Yeah well, I’m never letting you go now you're stuck with me, sweetheart.” He grins.

“Wouldn’t want it any other way, Potter,” You hum, placing a gentle kiss on his jaw.

“Not to ruin the moment- but why are you holding a vase?”

You smile sheepishly, “I thought you were some kind of thief.”

“I am- a thief who stole your heart,” he wiggles his eyebrows.

“You are so cheesy,” you laugh, tugging him into your apartment and closing the door behind you. You place the vase on a nearby table before turning to face James again.

“You love it.”

“Yeah, I do- now come over here and kiss me.” You grin, rocking on your heels.

He beams, placing his hands on each side of your face, pressing his lips against yours.

Mission Accomplished

Fin

——-

[ofstoriesandstardust]

can't take the home out of oklahoma - iiii. (k.c.)

a/n: dear God the behemoth of the crossover fic is finally finished. please remember to be kind in my comments, but of course i'd love to hear what everyone thought :). if you're new here, you can check out the other three parts here

summary: Two years after leaving California, Tyler hears from Jake, asking him to come to his engagement party. With an offer of putting the whole crew up in a hotel for two nights and an off-season lull, Tyler accepts. Two years after leaving California, you finally have to confront Javy. 

warnings: background iceman and hangster, happy ending, alcohol, swearing, please remember we are all the villains in someone's story thank you

word count: 13.2k

“So, I was thinking-” 

“Dangerous thing.” Kate mutters around a bite of waffle, prompting a fit of giggling from the two of you as Tyler narrows his eyes. 

“-I was thinking, instead of heading out to Arkansas straight after the end of the season, we take a road trip.”

“Where you thinking T?” Boone asks as you pick up your coffee cup. 

“San Diego, California.” 

You freeze, eyes flickering over to the blonde over the rim of your coffee cup, thankful you hadn’t taken a sip of the hot liquid yet. 

“What the hell, Owens?” You ask tersely, setting the mug down harder than you intend to, the brown liquid sloshing over the side. 

Tyler is pointedly avoiding your look as he sighs, shoulders deflating. “Look, my brother called. He- He’s getting married.” 

Your eyebrows shoot up. “To Bradley?” 

He nods, confirming. “Anyways, they’re having an engagement party out at Brad’s godfather’s. Jake’s invited us, all of us. Offered to put us all up in a hotel for two nights. I was uh- thinking about going.” 

“I think I’ll sit this out.” You say quietly, pushing your chair out. 

“Yeah, I ain’t so sure it’s the best idea to throw her into all of that.” Dani says, Lilly nodding alongside her. 

The girls had been told the story of your fiery departure from your hometown one night this past season, motel beds pushed together, wine drunk and cheap pizza forgotten. You’d told Dexter a week later, while you remarked on your ex-boyfriend’s love for a Louisiana crab boil, after you all had crossed into Louisiana to follow a storm. 

“Jake asked specifically about you.” Tyler admits quietly. 

You sigh, glancing up at the ceiling. “I don’t think the rest of them care to see me.” 

“We’ll make it work, okay? I ain’t gonna let anybody come at you.” Tyler pleads and you sigh again. 

You look at him for a moment but that’s all you need. It’s clear that Jake reaching out, asking him to come to this monumental event, means a great deal to him and you know as his family, it’s only right to step up to the plate for Tyler, no matter how uncomfortable it might make you. 

You know Tyler would do the same for you in a heartbeat. 

“Okay, T.  I’ll go with you guys.” 

His grin is splitting as Boone whoops, already chattering about the beach. 

“I ain’t promising to be nice to them.” 

Your words don’t even phase Tyler.

“Wouldn’t even dreaming of asking that of you, kid.”

-

The blue water sparkles as you peer out the window, the golden sunlight making it shine. 

“Jesus, I forget how blue it is.” You whisper to yourself as you take in downtown. 

The skyscrapers peer down back at you, the boats in the bay dotted across the docks. In the distance, you can see the outlines figures of the USS Midway and the Star of India. 

“How you feeling?” 

You shake your head, looking back at Kate. “It’s weird, kind of. Disorientating. I remember the first time I came home from college, it’s kind of like that. It all looks the same but the world kept turning after you left. Life kept going even though you’re not there to witness it.” 

She reaches out to squeeze your hand from the back of the truck. “I get what you mean.” 

Tyler glances at the two of you from his position in the drivers seat. The group had elected to take the van and your car, the SUV you’d bought last winter after you’d gotten sick of sharing Kate’s own storm chasing truck. 

Tyler’s red truck and Kate’s pickup had just not suited themselves to a cross country road-trip, which led you and Kate to driving most of the way. Tyler had finally corralled you into giving him the keys, under the condition you would sit passenger seat and give him directions. 

“Hey T, can we stop and get food before this thing?” 

Boone’s voice crackles over the radio and Tyler grabs it. You hadn’t really needed a radio of your own, but Boone and Tyler had insisted, outfitted the whole thing themselves. It sort of made you feel like a kid again, shouting across the room with your siblings in lieu of having walkie talkies while you played — everything followed with an OVER.

“I think they’re gonna feed us there Booney.” 

“Tyler, I am a starved woman. You rushed us out of breakfast this morning and we’ve been up before the sun was. It’s almost three in the afternoon and California already said we’ve got a decent drive across the city to get to this place. We’re stopping.” Dani’s voices comes through and Kate lets out a laugh from her seat. 

“Know any good places California?” 

You light up at Boone’s question, reaching for the radio but Tyler holds it just out of reach. 

“If you suggest In-N-Out one more time, I will drive this car into the ocean, so help me God.”

-

Niall Horan’s voice floats softly through the speakers as the car creaks to a stop in front of a familiar house. 

Your stomach flips as the barbecue from a locally owned joint near your Mom’s threatens to resurface. You distantly recall telling the group you’d been friends with the owners daughter in high school in a sad attempt to drown out Boone’s loud voice saying it would never be as good as Cathy’s. 

“You good California?” Javi asks and you startle, not even having realized you’d pulled yourself from the car. “You’re looking a little queasy there.” 

“Nerves.” You breathe and Kate takes your hand, squeezing it. 

“Thought you said they were nice.” Lilly says. 

“They are.” Just not to me. 

“This is quite the affair.” Dexter comments, glancing around the street as you walk up the road. “There’s hardly any spaces left.” 

“Bradley’s family is big.” You blurt out. “Lots of retired pilots who are probably thrilled to see their Baby Goose get married. Lots of friends from the service too I’m guessing.” 

“I wouldn’t want to be footing the bill for that wedding.” Dani whistles. 

The group begins to chatter and you wince, feeling your stomach roll as you step onto the grass. 

“You got this.” Kate whispers as you follow Tyler to the front porch. Tyler reaches out to press the doorbell, only to pull back at the last second. 

You raise your eyebrows. You don’t think you’ve seen the Tyler Owens cower back down from anything, much less a doorbell separating him from his twin. 

“You do it.” He says to you, stepping back.

“Me do it?” You ask incredulously. “You want to be kicked out before we ever step foot inside?” 

“I’ll do it.” Kate volunteers. She rings the doorbell, a short buzz followed by the sound of an I got it Mom! from somewhere inside behind the closed door. 

The door opens a few minutes later, revealing the now-taller daughter of Penny Benjamin. She blinks at the rag-tag crew. “Can I help you?” 

“Hi. I’m Kate and this is Tyler, we’re here for-“ Kate cuts herself off under the rather impressive stare of Amelia. Kate tugs on your arm, pulling you into view. “Here, you talk to the scary teenager.” 

“Hi Amelia.” You say softly. 

Amelia’s face lights up at the sight of you, exclaiming your name, drawing the attention of Tom as he rounds the corner to see who was at the door. Tom appears over her shoulder, nudging the girl back inside the house. 

“Tell Jake his brother’s here!” Tom calls after her before turning his attention back to your crew. “You must be Tyler and his crew. Jake mentioned that you guys would be stopping by. They’re all out in the back playing dogfight football.” 

Dogfight football? Tyler mouths to you as you all step inside the foyer. You shrug at his confused look. 

Long story you mouth back. 

“Anyways, I’m Tom, I’m one of Brad’s godfathers. I can take you all out to the back to meet the group?” 

You let your friends filter in front of you, hanging by the entrance to the kitchen and living room area. 

-

“I’m just gonna…” You mutter, letting your friends file out the glass door after Amelia and Tom. Penny gives you an unimpressed look from where she catches sight of you at the kitchen island and you give a sheepish shrug, feeling your cheeks heat up. “Selfish self-perseveration, sue me.” 

Pete glances up at you from one of the cabinets at the sound of your voice, lighting up as he does. “Well kid, I do have to say we never expected to see you again.” He holds out his arms and you grin, taking the invitation for a hug. 

If there was anything you’d learned about Pete Mitchell in the two and a half years you’d spent around his pilots, was that he offered Dad hugs to anyone at any chance he got. And boy, were they some of the safest hugs you’d ever had. 

“Hi Pete.” You say into his shoulder as he squeezes you. 

He pulls back, studying you. His thumb ghosts over a new scar on your cheek (thanks to an ill-timed rocket from Boone) and taking in the new piercings. “You look good kid.” 

“Thanks.” You breathe, unable to stop the genuine smile at earning his approval. 

His hand rests on your shoulder, guiding you farther into the kitchen. “Nick and Carole are outside with Coyote’s Dad and brother getting all the fixings grilled up. Do you want anything to drink?” 

You pause, stopping next to Javy’s Mom Lydia. You swallow, unsure of how she’ll react to you as you tell Pete you don’t want anything. He nods, grabbing his glass and nudging Penny towards the back patio after her daughter. 

“Hi Lydia.” You say softly. She studies you for a moment before pulling you into a tight hug. You melt into her touch, knowing you had accepted you may never get it again. 

You think of all the times you’d gotten the same hug from her, the innate soft care and compassion the woman had offered you, the same one she’d passed down to her son. 

You pull back, smiling at Javy’s sister-in-law (it seems like James had finally put a ring on it) and the little boy she holds in her arms. “Hi Scarlet.” 

The girl gives you a big grin. “How you doing?” 

“I’m good.” You answer. “Yeah, I’ve been good.” 

She smiles. “Good to hear.” She glances over Lydia’s shoulder. “Would you want to hold baby Jameson here for a minute while Dia and I go grab something from outside?” 

Your eyes grow wide. “You want me to hold your baby?” 

She shrugs. “I trusted you enough back then, I doubt I can’t trust you now.” 

You swallow, nodding. “Yeah, yeah of course.” You take the boy gingerly from her arms as he grins up real big at you. The boy only has two teeth but it looks like the nub of a third is growing in. “You and James make really cute babies.”

“I know.” She says smugly, before heading outside with Lydia.

You bounce the baby in your arms gently, cooing at him softly. 

“I sort of feel like I’m watching some alternate version of my future right now.” You gasp, whipping towards the sound of the voice. 

Leaning up against the doorjamb is Javy. 

The same Javy you’d fallen in love with all those years ago, a fond and yet pained smile on his face as he sticks his hands in his pockets. 

“Self preservation doesn’t work if you’re not outside with all your friends.” You breathe out as Jameson starts making grabby hands for his uncle. Javy walks towards the boy, letting him take his finger. It quickly becomes his new favorite chew toy as he shrugs. 

You snort as Javy smiles down at the kid. “Wanted to change. Scarlet knew I was in here so now I’m kinda figuring she left him here with you so we’d have to be civil.” You swallow, all humor leaving you as your eyes dart around the kitchen. 

In all the years you’d been gone, the Mitchell-Kazansky house hadn’t changed all that much. Maybe there were a few more pictures on the fridge, a coupon for a new pizza place, new throw pillows on the same worn couch, but the small beach front property that was inherently them had remained the same. 

“I don’t- I never expected- How are you here?” Javy asks, finally landing on words after a minute of silence and restarted attempts. 

“Jake’s brother.” You say quietly. “I’ve been working with Tyler in Oklahoma.” 

Javy reels back, Jameson letting go of his finger as he does. The toddler is quick to shift his attention to your hair, tugging on it. You wince. “Okay, I probably deserve this.” You mutter after a particularly hard yank from the toddler’s fist. 

Javy snorts, and you think it surprises him as much as it does you as a shy, goofy smile flickers on his face. “In another life, you were probably his auntie.” 

The words are meant to be light-hearted but they’re like an iron punch as the breath gets knocked clean from your lungs. 

“Javy-“ 

“Sorry, that wasn’t funny.” He dismisses as he crosses his arms. “So- Oklahoma huh? You liking it? The countryside is the last place I expected you to end up but you, uh- you look like you’re doing well.” 

You swallow around the lump that’s growing in your throat at the grief you’re having to confront earlier than you had anticipated. 

“I- Yeah, I like it out there. I’m good. Happy.” 

“I’m actually uh, not surprised to hear it. That you’re in Oklahoma. Just surprised at finally getting the confirmation.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Well, about a year ago, Fanboy had one of their streams on. He was just a casual fan, you know, background noise. The camera couldn’t have been on you for more than thirty seconds but I swore it was you. I made him go back and replay it a hundred times, I pulled up a hundred examples from other videos on the channel. The team was so convinced I was starting to lose it that Fanboy got banned from playing those streams anymore. Your hair was shorter in that first video, but I just- I knew it was you.” 

You hum, thinking to yourself. You’d appeared in the background of streams and edited videos countless times, but there had only been one haircut in two years. “It must’ve been after the rocket incident.” 

His eyes go wide. “The rocket incident?” 

“Boone still feels bad and Ty won’t let anyone really bring it up because it makes his blood pressure rise but imagine my surprise when I’m fiddling with something on top on the truck and Boone leans over on the console and accidentally sets off a rocket.” 

“That would only happen to you.” 

You snort. “I know. Most of the hair on one side was singed off anyways so I took the kitchen shears we have and chopped it all off in the back of the RV after we left urgent care.”

A beat passes as he drums his fingers against the countertop. “Hey, how long are you in town for?” 

“We’re supposed to leave sometime tomorrow, we’re gonna stop off in Vegas. Why?” 

“I was gonna see if you wanted to stop by the house. I’ve still got, actually quite a lot of your stuff. Like keepsakes and stuff your Mom tried to get rid of. If you wanted to swing by on your way out and pick through it.”

You nod. “Yeah, I should be able to fit that in.” You reach a hand out, nudging his shoulder. “Hey, how was Bob and Sophia’s wedding?” 

“The kind of classy country you can only imagine. It was so them.”

“Did you cry?” You tease and he ducks his head. 

“Maybe shed a tear or two.” 

“Hey, how’s your Mom?” You ask softly.

You remember all too well Javy getting that phone call. 

Four days before you were meant to defend your Masters thesis, Javy had gotten a call from his Mom, telling him that she had been diagnosed with DCIS — breast cancer. 

It had been non-invasive, thankfully, and after a quickly scheduled surgery, Lydia had expected to have a full recovery. 

Still — it had been a terrifying few weeks for Javy and you’d written out and deleted a hundred text messages to him on each anniversary of the diagnosis. 

“She’s good.” He says softly. “Still no signs of a return. Thanks for asking.” 

You nod. “I think about her a lot. And you, you know. How you all are doing. If she’s healthy, if you’re safe.” 

His eyes shine with a feeling you can’t quite name, but can describe only as a response to hearing words he never thought he’d hear but mean more to him then he’ll ever admit. 

“I think about you too. If you’re happy, if you’re happier than you were with me. If you found what it was you had been searching for.” He shakes his head, clearing your throat. “Grieving someone who was still alive-“ He lets out a low whistle. 

“I’m sorry.” You whisper. You know he hears you but he doesn’t say anything, letting the two of you exist in silence as baby Jameson babbles nonsensically.

“I can’t help but ask — you dating anyone?” 

The questions feels so stilted as you swallow. You knew he was trying to play at some cool nonchalance but he missed by a mile; it was obvious your answer meant a great deal to him. “I am.” He raises his eyebrows, clearly waiting for more information. “I have a girlfriend.” 

“What’s this girlfriend’s name?” 

You shake your head. “Don’t think it’s appropriate to bring her into this.” 

He sighs, letting his weight rest against the kitchen island. “I guess that’s fair. You were always more mature than me about stuff.”

The two of you sit in an awkward silence for a few minutes, the hollers of his friends from the back patio coming closer. You have a hundred questions for him and he probably has a thousand more for you but you both know you can’t ask them in this moment. His team must have come up off the beach and would probably be headed inside soon. His eyes flicker towards the back door, probably making the same assumptions as you. 

“Hey, do- do you think we could talk sometime tonight?” Your eyes flicker over to him, seeing the pain in them so clear. It feels unnatural to not reach out and smooth out the lines in between his eyebrows. “Now’s not the time but I- uh-“ He cuts himself off, shaking his head. 

You nod. “Yeah, we can. Just- later, okay?” 

You owed him closure. After the way you’d left, with the way you’d burned him, you owed him that at the very least.

Kate would understand. 

The backdoor slides open, the pilots shuffling in. Behind them, you can see the Wranglers, save for Kate and Tyler, take hesitant seats on the couches. It looks like Dexter’s still outside.

“Holy shit!” Omaha yells, sliding his sunglasses up. The pilots turn, a bunch of oohs being tossed up. 

“Does anybody else get the weird feeling we walked into some weird alternate timeline where her and Coyote got married and had kids?” Payback asks and Javy lets out a low groan. 

“Aliens.” Fanboy breathes out and his pilot tosses him a strange look. 

“It’s like seeing a ghost.” Natasha comments. 

“Yeah, a really bitchy ghost.” Omaha adds and you turn sharply, plopping the toddler into his uncle’s arms. 

“Would you look at that, some things really do never change. I still really hate your friends.” 

“Can I have a hug?” Jake blurts out, silencing his friends. 

You raise an eyebrow as you give him a once-over. “Um, I guess. If you put a shirt on first.”

Mickey hits his pilot as Jake disappears around the corner. “My alien theory isn’t so weird now, is it?” 

Payback winces, rubbing his stomach where Mickey had smacked him. “Nice to see you too Mickey.” You say, rounding the kitchen island. 

The boy gives you a nervous smile. It’s an odd look on the boy who’d always greeted you with a wide grin, home-cooked food, and a picture of his new Lego set. It’s an odd look for the kid who’d probably been your favorite of Javy’s friends, and definitely the closest to you, so long as no one said that in front of Bradley. (Bradley Bradshaw had taken it upon himself to name his role in your life as unintentional big brother). “Hey.” 

Jake reappears, having tugged one of Bradley’s old Top Gun shirts over his head. “Hi.” He says softly, stopping in front of you. “Can I have a hug now?” 

You sigh. “Fine, I guess.” 

You’re not sure what you’re expecting from Jake (a hug certainly wasn’t on the table) but his hug is tight, borderline painful as you hesitantly and awkwardly wrap your arms around his much larger and taller frame. You step back as someone clears their throat. Jake lets you go willingly as Boone reaches out for your wrist, tugging you to sit down in between him and Dani. 

Jake turns, facing the person who’s just walked into the house. 

“Knock knock.” She says and your head turns, catching sight of Lainey’s blond hair. Javi reaches around Boone, nudging your back, reminding you to breathe as Jake’s face lights up. “Wait, there’s two of you?” 

“Lainey! Didn’t think you’d make it! Yeah, uh, this is my twin brother Tyler. We, uh don’t talk much.” 

“Oh, we know.” You say under your breath, only loud enough for your friends to hear, and Boone spits out a laugh, Javi having to cough into his fist to cover up his own laughter. 

Tyler snaps, eyes narrowing, turning to you. “I thought you’d agreed to being on your best behavior.” 

“I didn’t say anything!” You defend, which elicits a loud laugh from Dani as Lilly throws out a “Stop being so hard on her T!” 

Tyler huffs, his hands fall to his waist and you have to bite back a giggle that eventually falls out anyways when you see Kate doing the same thing.

“You’re such a Dad, T.” You say through a laugh, shaking your head which elicits laughter from the whole group. 

Lainey turns as you talk, face softening. “I didn’t think any of us would ever see you again. Where you’ve been?” 

“Oklahoma!” Javy shouts from across the kitchen. It sends his friends into an uproar, reeling from the fact. 

“See, my aliens theory is looking more and more true!” 

-

Kate doesn’t want to admit that her stomach drops at the sight of your ex quietly slipping out the door after you but she knows it’s warranted given the way all his friends notice. 

“What’re the odds she gives Javy another chance?” Jake’s fiancé asks Jake. Jake lets out some discontented noise from the back of his throat before pushing himself off his seat on the floor and meandering into the kitchen. 

“I will put money on her coming back. I’m so Team Javy, you know this.” One of the other pilots (Fanboy, her brain recalls). 

“I’m team her staying in Oklahoma with her girlfriend. She’s earned that quiet life.” One of the girlfriends (Kaycee, she’s dating Phoenix, you’d run through all the possible attendees with her and Tyler in the car this morning in the quiet calm, dawn barely peaking over the horizon) pipes up with. 

“Of course you’re on her side.” One of the others says. “You always liked her more than the rest of us.” 

Kaycee’s eyes slide up to the man. “Well yeah, Payback, I was the one consoling at her at every group event when Hangman came down on her and made her feel unwanted. So of fucking course I don’t want her to get back together with the guy

whose friends made her feel like shit.” 

“You take that too seriously, K. We were obviously just fooling around, not our fault she’s too sensitive.” 

The girl’s eyes narrow at the man. “Omaha, so help me-“ 

“She’s not your piece of meat to fight over!” Dani finally bursts. The in-fighting stops abruptly as the attention turns to them. “I’m just saying- if she’s happy, can’t you just leave her be? She’s a person, not some object for y’all to fight about.” 

The group all but forgets Dani even said anything when the one with the glasses turns back to Bradley. “You really think she’ll take Javy back?”

“A hundred percent. You remember how she used to look at him. And he was ass over teacups for her. Remember that year she bought him the Saints jersey with his last name on the back and he near lost his mind the first time she stole it to wear?” 

“Dude, he wasn’t half as bad dating as he was before. Remember the first time he brought her to the Hard Deck and he insisted he buy every drink for her?” Mickey chimes in. 

“I remember when they came to the house for the first time to watch a movie and Mickey kept teasing her about not doing anything on the couch, I thought Coyote was gonna drown Mick in the pool. He was so desperate to impress her and yelled at us for potentially making it so she never talked to him again.” Bob adds through a laugh. “Which she totally did, she fucking loved him from the first time they matched. Remember how his hands used to start sweating cause he got so nervous around her?” 

She glances at Javi and Boone next to her, glad to see her own unease is mirrored on their faces. Lilly’s reminder from earlier resurfaces in her mind as she plays with tab on her soda can. 

She loves you Kate. She wouldn’t go anywhere in the world you ain’t. 

“Coyote’s always had a way with words around her. He’ll say the right thing, tell her he’ll miss her, and she’ll come back just like she was always meant to.” Phoenix comments and she swallows, looking down at her jeans. 

Javi and Boone both stand up next to her, a whispered conversation happening she doesn’t care to try and hear as their exit goes unnoticed. The discomfort and unease in her stomach grows, feeling her whole world tilt at the thought that someone may say something to make you realize you’d been wrong to come to Oklahoma, wrong to love her, and that you’d go back to the place you had belonged this whole time. 

She catches Tyler’s eye, a stormy look growing on his face. 

I don’t like this, it says. 

She didn’t either. 

-

“See, I’d ask if you’re just taking a breather, but I know you, so you’re definitely hiding.”

Your eyes shoot up at Javy as he gently shuts the front door to the house, moving to sit down on the porch swing across from where you’re resting your weight on the porch railing. 

“Yeah, well, when they start eating my food straight from my hands I think I have to bow out.” 

He grins at the memory. 

Just half an hour ago, you’d been trying to shove Boone off of you as he attempted to take a bite of your burger, crowded up into Lilly and Dani’s space more than they probably ever wanted you to be. Javi had leaned over, taking a huge bite of burger as it had been sitting in your hand farthest away from Boone’s reach and you’d frozen in shock when you’d seen what he’d done out of your periphery. 

Dexter had tried to save face, over the sound of Dani yelling about how foul the move was, by saying that usually the lot of you were much more civilized but Tyler and Kate had immediately refuted it with a unified no, we ain’t. It had been all the encouragement you needed to plop what was left of the burger in Javi’s hand and to disappear outside.

“They seem to really like you. That one, Boone, was telling me we weren’t allowed to have you back. You’re theirs now.” 

You sigh, crossing your arms. “They’re- they’re really good to me. They’re family.” 

“I’ll admit that’s kind of hard to hear. Rooster and Fanboy kinda seem to be under the impression that you still might come back. Mav too. If I play my cards right.” 

You let out another sigh, looking away from him. “Javy, don’t even go there. Please don’t start that with me, cause you aren’t gonna like what I have to say.”

He shifts, bending to lean on his knees as he does his best to catch your eye. “What can I say to fix this? What can I say to convince you to come home?” 

“Oklahoma is my home!” You insist, feeling frustration begin to tighten in your chest. 

“No the hell it isn’t. How many times did you say your heart belonged here? How many times did you say you were meant for city living by the beach? And now you’re telling me that you live on a farm in the middle of buttfuck nowhere Oklahoma and you just what, love your life? I don’t believe that. Not for a minute.”

A whimper of frustration slips out as your hands come down to scrub your face. “Javy.” You say shakily. “I am happy to have any kind of closure conversation you need to have to find peace and move on. But if this is going to be about you trying to convince me to come back to a life I don’t want anymore, then I will go back inside.” You say, mustering up a calm tone you don’t feel and he reels back as if you’ve hit him. 

“I just don’t understand.” He says softly and your shoulders deflate. “I love you. You were my whole world, I wanted everything with you. I don’t understand. Help me understand.” 

His voice cracks and the lump in your throat from earlier reappears. “I was- I was unhappy for a really long time Javy.” 

He immediately shakes his head, cutting you off. “No, no that’s bullshit. I know that’s bullshit. C’mon, was there someone else?” 

“Are you insinuating I fucking cheated on you?” You near shout, straightening up. 

“Well!” He matches the raise in voice, standing up from the porch swing. 

“That’s bullshit.” You say. “If I recall, I was 25, working a dead end barista job because the masters degree I went into thousands of dollars of debt for proved to be useless with a boyfriend who let his friends walk all over me! I didn’t just wake up that day and decide I was miserable Javy! It was a slow build, a build you contributed to!” 

The front door opens and shuts and you spare a glance to see Boone and Javi lingering by the front door. 

Later, they’ll confess to you that the only reason they’d ventured outside to interrupt the conversation is because the pilots inside had gotten so smug in their surety that Javy would convince you to leave Oklahoma to be with him, they’d started to worry about you being alone on the porch. 

Javi had hastily assured you that they didn’t think you couldn’t handle yourself, but he was afraid he’d hit all your guilty spots, Boone sure he’d say all the things you’d wanted to hear back then, and you’d leave the Wranglers without so much as backwards glance. They’d wanted you to know they had your back. 

They’ll admit it was selfish of them and Dani will tell them they’re stupid for not remembering how much you love your life here, and you’ll tell them that you’re not angry, that their intentions had been good. 

All their presence does now in this moment though is piss your ex-boyfriend off as he throws his hands up. “Can’t even have one conversation without your little fucking guard dogs, huh? Little side pieces behind your girlfriend’s back?” 

“Stop it.” You say sternly. “Stop going there. You know I was never unfaithful to you, you know that I never would’ve done that.” 

“I don’t know if I ever knew you at all. Not really. So yeah, who’s to say if you aren’t a cheater if you were quietly miserable enough to dump me and run halfway across the country.”

You groan, rubbing your temples. “God, you’re not listening to me. You didn’t listen to me then, you don’t listen to me now.” 

“All I ever did was fucking listen to you! You never shut up!” 

Boone lets out a “Hey man!” alongside Javi’s “Whoa there.”

“Don’t talk to her like that man.” Boone says. “Have some respect, that there’s a lady and she was a lady you cared a lot about, so be nice.” Boone drawls. 

Your ex fixes him with a glare that would’ve made a weaker man whimper, but Boone isn’t one to back down. He drives into tornados and shoots rockets at them for fuck’s sake. 

Unintentionally or not, Boone’s intervention gives you the pause you need to take a deep breath and collect yourself. “Javy.” You start, softer this time. His eyes snap over to yours. “I understand the anger and frustration and the confusion. I know that I left rather suddenly and I never gave you any explanation as to why. But you have to know, we were fighting all the time and I was so unhappy, not just in my relationship with you, but in my job and myself. And after Texas, I snapped. It was a catalyst event that permanently altered the course of my life.” 

His eyebrows furrow in confusion. “The fuck does Texas have to do with anything?” 

You sigh. “You keep saying that you still love me, yeah? The problem with that Javy is that you’re in love with a version of me that doesn’t exist anymore. That girl that you loved died in Texas and she’s never coming back.” 

“I still don’t understand.” You sigh, licking your lips as you glance at your friends. Javy’s voice is rising again but you know that you’ll never be able to get him to understand the truth without blowing up Jake’s spot. And truthfully, maybe it’s long past due. “We were in love, we were happy, you were my best friend. We go to Texas for Bob’s bachelor party and three days later, you’re dumping me to go hop on a plane to Oklahoma to never be seen again. That doesn’t make any fucking sense! What the hell does Texas have to do with anything?!” 

You move faster than you let your brain think about it, sliding through your friends as you push open the front door, striding through the foyer. You catch Bradley’s eye as you do so and he straightens. “Where the fuck is Jake?” 

Jake comes into view as he shuts the fridge, turning to face you. “What?” He asks tiredly, but judging by the look on his face, you think he already knows. 

“I want you to be honest.” You say, every bit of the calm you’d tried to collect slipping through your grasp as you inch closer to Dani and Lilly. “Tell them the truth about what happened in Texas.” 

“Are we really doing this?” He asks, plopping down on one of the bar stools by the kitchen island. 

“You owe me, Seresin. After everything you put me through, you owe me.” 

Jake sighs, scrubbing a hand down his face as Javy’s head swings wildly between the two of you. 

Just when you’re about to turn and accept the villain narrative these men had decided for you, Jake sighs again. “I asked her to lie about the rodeo.” He says quietly. “We never made it to shelter.” 

“So? A little wind, a little rain, that’s your excuse for going off the deep end?” Javy snaps but Jake isn’t finished. 

“We watched Steven die.” 

The silence that follows is one you never want to experience again as the whole room tunnels in on Jake. Lilly stands up, Dani not far behind her, nudging you towards the door and silently talking over your head to your friends but you feel rooted to your spot. 

“What?” Lainey asks first, pushing her self up as she takes shaky breaths. “You- you saw him die? And you never told me?” 

“Why didn’t you ever tell me that Jake?” Bradley asks quietly, a quiet concern and cool anger laced into the words. 

“I don’t know. I wasn’t thinking. I don’t know if I was trying to protect her or me but I did it anyways. It’s why I gave her Tyler’s number.” He says, finally raising his eyes to meet the room. “I’m the one who gave her Tyler’s info. When she dumped Coyote that day, I knew she was a serious flight risk in more ways than one and I- I knew if I could get her to Tyler, he’d take care of her. I knew she’d be safe with Ty. And I mean obviously he did.” He says, waving a hand at his brother and Kate. “I owed it to her after all this times I said those things about y’alls sex life, all those times I made fun of her behind your back. I mean, everything I said about her age or about how you guys wouldn’t work long-term so you guys would break up-“ Jake cuts himself off, sniffing. “I was awful to her under the guise of trying to be a good friend but I was a rotten friend and a rotten person and I’m sorry.” 

“What the hell is wrong with you?” 

You expect it to be Javy but it’s Tyler and you think you can see his hand shake as he pulls himself off of the couch. 

“Genuinely, you haven’t changed a day. You’re still that same piece of shit you were then, when you couldn’t bother showing up to our grandparents funeral, the people who raised us, because of some stupid little trophy. You’re out here a decade later making a poor girl in her twenties who was simply trying to exist with the guy she loved feel like her life isn’t worth living anymore, that she doesn’t offer anything of value to this world.” 

“But, I mean- it worked out right? she’s been with you guys and she’s happier than she’s ever been in her whole life.” 

“Oh, sure no, it worked out.” Javi intervenes. “If you discount the irreversible trauma and her inherent belief that she would always, eventually, force the people around her to see her as a burden, then yeah, it totally worked out.”

“Which we’re still working on undoing, by the way. Thanks for that. ” Dani comments dryly. 

“Okay, hey, hold on- that’s not all on Jake.” You interrupt and Bradley’s head swings towards you. 

“Are you seriously fucking defending him right now?” 

“I’m defending him because that’s wrong! What Jake did didn’t do anything other than reinforce an idea I have held about myself my whole life, Bradshaw! But you don’t get that, just like you never got it back then! You had two parents who loved you unconditionally and friends and all the support in the world! I’ve never had that! I grew up with a piece of shit family, I grew up with awful friends and an even worse ex-boyfriend, and you people refused to ever understand the life I came from! Don’t pin that all on Jake!” 

Lilly tugs on your arm, telling you to breathe and it’s the first time you realize you’re even crying. 

In a flash, you dig the keys for one of the cars out from Lilly’s pocket, turning on your heel. Your friends call out after you but you don’t listen to them as you wipe tears from your eyes, vision blurry as you make your way towards the car. 

And then someone’s there, wrestling the keys from your grasp. 

It’s Javi.

“I’ll take you wherever you want to go.” He says softly. “I just- don’t want you driving right now.” 

You nod, climbing into the car passenger seat. Once you’re in, Javi reaches over the console to give you a hug. It’s at an awkward angle and you can’t stop crying, but it’s warm and safe and all you need in that moment. 

“You’re gonna be okay, California. We got you.” 

-

“Where did you guys go?” 

Boone asks from his spot on the couch. He’s leaned up against Lilly, feet on Dani’s lap as Dexter putters around the kitchenette in your two bedroom suite Jake had paid for. 

“The beach.” Javi says, setting the keys on the entryway table. 

“Where’s Ty and Kate?” You ask.

It goes eerily quiet. “Um, they had to run an errand.” Boone says after a long minute. 

“I’m too tired to even unpack that.” You say, running a hand down your face. “I’m going to go shower.” 

You slip inside to the bedroom you and Kate had been sharing with Dani and Lilly, walking into the bathroom. After shedding your clothes, you step into the hot water. It soothing against your skin as you bite back a yawn. 

You’d told Javi to pick a beach, any beach, and the two of you had found a picnic table over looking the shore as you looked out at the moonlit waves. 

It had been a quiet, grounding peace that had settled over you as you had reviewed the events of the night. Javi’s quiet voice mixed with the crashing of the waves, soothing you as he talked about Miami, and the Tornado Tamers, and the military, and a hundred different things.

Now though, in the lull of noise, save for the quiet murmurs of your friends through the wall, guilt prickles at you underneath your skin, heavy and all consuming. 

It’s second nature, autopilot, climbing out of the shower and tugging on Kate’s sweatshirt, blindly pulling out a pair of sleep shorts from one of your bags. The bed that had once looked so appealing no longer looks comfortable as you have to work considerably to swallow around the rapidly growing lump in your throat. 

You open the door right as Kate and Tyler return to the hotel room. Tyler gives you a grin as he waves a bag in the air. “Look where we trekked to. Surprise.”

Normally, you would’ve grinned and laughed and said I’d pay good money to see the Midwesterners in an In-N-Out but now all you can do is shrink into Kate’s sweatshirt as you get the overwhelming feeling that you don’t deserve this. 

You don’t deserve Kate, you don’t deserve this team. Not this job you loved so much, not this life you’d carved out for yourself. 

Kate’s face falls as she closes the distance between the two of you. “What’s wrong?” 

“I’m so tired of feeling guilty.” You gasp out, a sob you hadn’t expected coming out. It leaves you scrambling for breath, coming in ragged pants. “I’m tired of feeling guilty for being happy, for having this job, for tricking all of you into thinking that I’m- that I’m worth something. I’m so tired of- of feeling guilty for leaving him and- and I’m tired of feeling guilty for living.”

Kate’s hug is tight, almost as if she lets go, you’ll slip right through her fingers. “Sweetheart.” She whispers into your shoulder as you hesitate to wrap your arms around her. 

“I don’t feel like I deserve it. I don’t feel like I deserve any of it. I didn’t feel like I deserved it then and I don’t feel like I deserve it now.” 

Kate lets you go, a soft look coming over her face as her hands find your face. You feel like you look worse than you ever have, tears sliding down your face, choking on your own words and sobs and snot. 

“Baby…” She says, so soft and tender, in that way that’s all Kate and usually makes you blush, makes you feel more seen then you ever have in your entire life. “You’ve had one hell of a go at life, I’ll admit you got a rough set of cards. But you- you went through something traumatic and you made the only decisions you could at the time. Those people- they’re angry at you because they feel bad for their friend cause he got hurt. And maybe we’re all a villain in someone else’s life but you shouldn’t feel guilty for doing what you need to do for you.” She takes a deep breath. “You didn’t deserve to die for him any more than I deserved to die for my friends. And for the first time, I really mean that. We don’t deserve to suffer or feel pain for the rest of our lives because of it, you know? It’s okay for us to continue to live and laugh and love — our mistakes, they don’t define us. We don’t have to live there.” Kate’s eyes are pleading, begging you to hear her and understand her; to believe her. 

You nod as she swipes a thumb to wipe away a tear. 

“You would never blame me for what my happened to my friends. You’d never say I should suffer in pain or in a life of exile because of it. You’d tell me for what it is — that it was a freak accident and it was out of your control. You can’t spend the rest of your life in those haunted what ifs and I know you’d never want that for me either.”

“Yeah.” Your voice is gravely, raw, but you can’t even focus on it as Boone’s lanky arms wrap around your frame. “Yeah, I hear you.” 

“Sides, even if it were your fault-“ 

“Boone!” Lilly chides, even as she wraps her own arms around you. 

“I ain’t saying it is! You people, you always assume the worst outta me-“ 

“Get to the point!” Javi’s exhausted voice comes from the kitchen. You snort, leaning your head into Boone’s shoulder. 

“Get on with it, Booney.” You whisper. 

“‘M just saying, even if it were your fault, it don’t change that your part of our family now. Always gonna be, no matter where them wind or tornados take us. Or what some stupid Navy guy says about you for that matter.” 

Boone squeezes you before he steps back. Lilly lets you go, albeit hesitantly and you wipe your nose on the sleeve of Kate’s sweatshirt. Javi’s hand finds your back, wrapping you into a tight hug as you turn.  

“You gotta start letting yourself believe you’re worthy of good things.” He mumbles into your sweatshirt. “Trust me, I- I get it okay. It was just as rough for me when I left StormPar, but Boone’s right. We’re a family.” 

You nod into Javi’s shoulder, squeezing the man before letting him go. You wipe your eyes, taking a breath. “Okay, okay, I think I’m good. Just been a hell of a night.” 

Javi nods and the room breaks into quiet chatter as the bags of food get passed around, burgers getting split up among the group. 

Tyler grabs your arm as you pad over to sit on the couch next to Kate. His hug is tight, the smell of cedar and campfire lingering on his flannel a far cry from the smell of jet fuel and whiskey that followed his brother. 

“You saved my life T.” You say quietly, even though no one would be able to hear you through the conversation at the couch. “The Wranglers saved my life. I hope you know that.” 

He squeezes you. “Nah, kid. We just loved you enough for you to see why you should stay. The saving part was all you.” 

-

“I need to go run an errand.” The table looks up at you, pausing around mid-conversation, breakfast plates forgotten. “So you guys can head out on the road ahead of us.” 

“What’re you up to?” Boone asks.

You shake your head. “There’s just something I gotta do before we head out.” 

“Some unfinished business?” Javi asks. 

“Something like that.”

-

The weather is unusually dreary, rain drizzling down on and off as you make the drive over the Coronado bridge. You park in front of the boys house, turning the key in the ignition as you turn to face Tyler and Javi in the backseat. 

“I’m not sure how long this is gonna take, but I’ll be back.” 

“Man, what am I supposed to do to entertain myself?” Javi moans and Kate turns, giving him a sharp glare. 

Late last night, after everyone had fallen asleep, you’d admitted to Kate that you didn’t think you could leave things with him like that, that you couldn’t live with yourself if you never gave him the closure he so desperately needed. 

Kate had told you, voice muffled, that she understood. That she’d stand by you in whatever conversation you wanted to have with him. 

“Go take a walk for all I care. It’s a nice neighborhood.” You say, before wrenching the car door opening, cutting off Javi’s bemoaned But it’s raining! as you slam it harder behind you than you normally ever would’ve allowed it to. 

You wince, already hearing Tyler scold you in your head as you stride up the expansive driveway, saying a silent thank you that Javy’s beat-up truck is sitting in the driveway. 

You force yourself to take a deep breath as you knock on the door. The blue paint is peeling more than ever you note, before it swings open, revealing Mickey. He’s donned in basketball shorts and a muscle tee and must’ve just come back from a run, based on the sweat and rain accumulated on him.

He almost doesn’t seem surprised to see you. 

“Hey.” He says, leaning against the door. 

“Hey.” You respond. “Is Javy here?” 

He nods, opening the door enough to let you inside and the oak shuts firmly behind you as you follow him through the familiar foyer to the couches in the living room. 

“You guys are not much for redecorating.” 

Mickey groans. “Kid, the fact that we’ve gotten anything on the walls as long as we lived in this place is a miracle in and of itself, you know that.” 

Despite the situation, you snort, recalling when the boys had enlisted you to build Mickey’s desk one time two years into them living here. “Oh, I remember.” 

“Coyote!” Mickey shouts up the stairs as you arrive next to the couch, nudging Jake. He gives you a soft smile, pushing himself up to give you a quick hug. 

“I’m really sorry about last night. I didn’t mean to ruin it.” 

Jake shakes his head. “‘S my fault. You and I both know there was probably no other outcome than that.”

The fabric of his Texas sweatshirt is soft as he squeezes you, letting you go as you hear footsteps on the stairs. 

You sigh, turning catching sight of your ex turning the corner. His eyes widen slightly at the sight of you and he tugs on the edges of his Saints sweatshirt. 

He’s nervous, you realize. The taste of that truth is bitter and acrid on your tongue. 

“We need to talk.” You say with more stern bravado then you feel and you force yourself to soften as Mickey lets out a low whistle. “And you, uh, said you had some of my stuff.” 

“We have all of your stuff.” Mickey comments into his protein shake. “It’s all in Bob’s old room.” He points with a finger over his shoulder, but you still know the way. 

You head in the direction to Bob’s room, tugging on the sleeve of Javy’s hoodie as you do. 

He follows you, shutting the bedroom door behind him as you scan the room. “When did Bob move out?” You ask as you pull a box out, sifting through the books. 

“Like two or three months after you left. Think he had plans to move out earlier but uh-“ Javi pauses and your eyes flicker up to study him. “I think they were concerned I’d do something stupid to myself if it was too much change at once.” 

You sigh, eyes fluttering shut as you squat and brace yourself against the box. “Javy.” You breathe out. 

“I’m really sorry about how last night went.” He says as he leans up against one of the taller stacks of boxes. “My Mom’s pretty pissed at me for how I handled myself. I’m mad at myself too. I shouldn’t have yelled at you like that. Drinking or not, you didn’t deserve it. I was just- confused and frustrated and so hopeful it made me scared. I guess I never prepared myself for what it would be like to see you again, even though clearly-“ He says, gesturing to the room. “I always let myself keep that door open.” 

“Why did you keep this shit anyways?” You ask. “You coulda let my Mom toss all this shit out.” 

He shakes his head. “I couldn’t have. I- I always thought maybe you’d come home. That when you did come home, you’d roll your eyes about your Mom and want your stuff back. Fools hope I guess.” 

You let yourself fall to the floor in a cross-crossed position, scrubbing a hand down your face. “Javy, I am so sorry about how I left. You deserved a lot better than that from me, after everything you did for me. But I was scared and I ran and you got caught in that.”

“Every day since then, I’ve wondered what it was about me that wasn’t enough to make you stay. Did I not love you right? Did I do something to hurt you? Did I not stop when I should’ve?” He takes a sharp breath at the thought that he might’ve pushed you too far while being intimate as being your reason for running. “Every night for two years, I’ve laid in bed at night, going over every single detail. But last night, after hearing that it was Jake’s fault, I’ve gone over every what if. What if he had listened to you? What if he hadn’t taken you? What if I hadn’t gotten drunk that night before or- or had convinced you to stay? What if you had stayed home from the trip; what if Sophia had never asked you to be a bridesmaid? What if-“ 

“Javy, stop.” You stay sternly, pushing yourself up off the floor. “You can’t live in those what ifs. They’ll drive you fucking crazy. You can’t keep living in the past. And it ain’t Jake’s fault, much as we would all, himself probably included, like to lay the blame on him. We can’t go back and change it and we can’t live in that history neither. What happened, happened.” 

He lets out a breath. “You’re handling this better than me.” 

“I’ve had two years to process it. I’ve had two years in a new town with a new job and a new partner and new friends to heal from all of it. You haven’t even had two days to grapple with the truth.” You say as you pop the lid on the box. Your eyes scan the room as you let him process the information, trying to catalogue all that he has, what you need and what you don’t. 

“My Niall Horan shirt!” You exclaim, wrestling a box out of the corner of the room. “I’d been wondering what happened to this!” You pop the lid off, subsequently discovering your American Girl doll. “And Julie! I remember that year I went as her for Halloween and brought her over here. She was the highlight of the party for all the drunken idiots.” 

“That was the year of the dolls.” He comments from behind you. 

“Yeah, yeah, cause you guys all went as Ken dolls, except for Mickey, who went as Carlos from Big Time Rush, and I finally had to explain to you who they were after I made that joke, that they were the greatest boy band of our generation, on our second date.” 

“It’s crazy to think about now, how the yahoos could all see how I felt about you and I was still insisting we were just friends.” 

“Oh, enough time has passed. We can admit now that we weren’t just friends. We made out too much, in public no less, for that to be anywhere near platonic.” 

He doesn’t say anything for a minute and you turn, worried you’ve gone too far. His eyes are glassy, a fond smile on his face. 

“I really loved you, you know that?” 

“Javy…” 

He gives a half-shrug, looking down. “You can say what you want about being unhappy, about needing to leave, but I hope you know that I really loved you. I really cared about you and I really thought some day you’d come home to me. You were my best friend and I wanted to grow old with you. It just- it just feels like it didn’t mean anything to you.” 

A lump grows in your throat as he wipes a few tears away from his cheeks. You look down, unsure if you should admit the truth. 

“Javy, I found the ring.” 

“W-what?”

“The night we got back from Texas, I accidentally found it. But it- it freaked me out. I was already walking such a fine line those days, so afraid and so mixed up from what happened, already so unhappy and I knew it was over then and there. Because I found it and pictured you getting down on one knee and tried to think of what I’d say and when I knew I’d say no, I knew I needed to end it.” 

He lets out a choked sob as you work your throat around the ever-growing lump, knowing you have to finish this conversation, as much as it pains you. 

“Javy, of course it meant something to me.” You say, unclenching your hand from where it’s fisted in the dark blue material of the t-shirt. You set the objects down back in the box, taking a few steps towards him. “Javy, I did love you. Really. You were my first real boyfriend, my first serious boyfriend, my first. I thought the world of you and you were my best friend too. Okay, my favorite times were when we would stay up all night laughing or- or all those times we just existed together. But both things can be true — you can have hurt me, I can have been unhappy, and we both can still have loved each other the best we could’ve at the time.” You say, taking another step towards him. “But that’s what I keep trying to tell you. That girl that I was with you, that person you fell in love with, she doesn’t exist anymore. I’m not that version of me anymore.” Javy only looks at you as he cries as you cling to the hope that this time he’ll finally listen.

“Can I have a hug?” He croaks. You nod, reaching out for him and he’s quick to tug you into his embrace, as if you might change your mind waiting a hair of a second longer. 

His hug is tight, and you can feel the way his tears wet your pale yellow Oklahoma crewneck, the same way you know you’re soaking his Saints hoodie. 

It’s weird, because hugging him doesn’t feel like coming home like it used to. 

It’s weird, because it feels like the door on this part of your life is finally shutting behind you. 

You think you’re at peace with it.

“You sure you won’t come back?” His muffled voice sounds. 

“You know I can’t.” He whimpers as you  shake your head. “I’d be coming back to a place that isn’t my home anymore, a life that isn’t mine. Javy, you have to let me go. If not for me, then for yourself.” 

“I don’t know how.” He pleads into your shoulder. 

“It takes time.” You whisper. “But one day it won’t hurt so much. I promise.”

You aren’t sure how long the two of you stand there, but finally he lets you go, stepping back as his back hits the wall, sliding down. You take that as a sign that you can get back to sorting. 

“Hey, you’ve asked me a lot of questions about what’s changed since you been gone. Can I ask you questions about what you’ve been up to?” He asks, voice watery and raw. 

“Seems only fair.” You say, squatting down to rifle through a box full of high school memorabilia. 

“Are you dating Kate?” 

You swallow, glancing at him as you pull out your yearbooks. “Yeah, I am.” 

“I figured.” 

“How’d you figure it out?” 

“She looks at you like how I used to.” He says with a shrug as he stretches his legs out in front of him. Upon seeing your dubious look, he lets out a wet laugh. “She just- she always found a reason to be next to you last night. She always brought you into conversation, looked for you when you weren’t with her, looked for you even when you were with her. It was obvious she cared a great deal about you and I sort of guessed she was who you didn’t want to bring into this.” 

You shake your head. “This isn’t her fight. She’s got my back, I know that, but this didn’t need to involve her if I could help it. It was between me and you.” 

“She seems cool.” He finally comments after a minute. 

“Freaky genius and all the wit to match.” 

“Like you.” Your cheeks warm at the compliment as you untangle the honor cords. “She make you happy?” 

“Honestly?” You say and he nods. “I see my whole life with her in a way I’ve never seen it before. She’s my best friend and my partner. I love her to death and there’s nowhere in this world I wouldn’t follow her.” 

“You guys have any pets?” 

“Two dogs and a cat.” 

“Jesus, is this farm you live on really a zoo?” 

“I think her Mom feels that way sometimes.” You say with a chuckle. “No, the team has Buttons, but he’s really Boone’s if you want to get into it. Ty’s taken on a dog I named Enid by sheer force of will from this dog. And Kate and I adopted a kitten named Peaches about this time two years ago. Ty and I are getting horses in October too.” 

“So… you and Kate living together?” 

You shake your head. “No. Not yet, anyways. Technically, I got a small two bedroom apartment in Tulsa I rent with the other Javi but he’s almost always somewhere in Arkansas with Boone in the off-season and I spend all my time with Kate on her farm when we aren’t out on the road.”

“They seem like really good people.” 

“They’re some of the best. Hey, are you still in touch with Elle?” 

Javy’s eyes widen. “Your friend from grad school? Some, why?” 

“You should ask her on a date.”

“No- No, I couldn’t.” 

You fix him with a look. “Why not? I bet that girl is still enamored with you.” 

“She was your best friend, that would be wrong.” 

You shrug, setting aside a snow globe. “We ain’t together anymore and Elle and I ain’t friends anymore. And trust me, if you and I hadn’t been what we were when Elle came into my life, Elle would’ve a hundred percent gone after you. And I wouldn’t be mad you know. You deserve to move on.” 

“Not with one of your friends.” 

You click your tongue. “I’m just saying…”

-

Kate’s drumming her fingertips on the edges of the door as the minutes tick by, the gnawing in her stomach resurfacing as the time drags on. Javi huffs for the millionth time, blowing a stray curl away from his face as a blue Bronco passes them, pulling up to park in the driveway. 

Javi leans forward, peering over the center console to study the two men climbing out of the Bronco through the windshield. “Hey Ty, isn’t that your brother’s fiancé?” 

Tyler looks up from his phone, glancing out his window. When he finally responds, his voice is impossibly tight, making her wince. “Kate, where exactly are we right now?” 

Upon her non-answer, Tyler pulls himself from the car, a colorful swear leaving his mouth as Javi follows right behind him. She scrambles out of her door, tugging on the two men’s arms. “Stop it.” She pleads, causing them both to turn. “Look, I don’t like it either but I gotta respect the fact that she wants closure. I’d do anything to have that, you know that.” 

Tyler yanks his arm back, striding across the lawn towards the two men as they let themselves in the house. Bradley’s eyes are wide as he catches sight of Tyler, shouting into the house. 

She groans when Tyler shoulders past Bradley and Pete, Javi still hot on his heels. “I am so sorry about them.” She apologizes to the two men as they shut the front door. 

“Tyler.” Jake growls, yanking on his brother’s arm. “I will sit on your head like I did when we were kids.” 

“I am not gonna let you do this to her again. For two years, my team has been putting that girl back together, putting together pieces of her you broke.” Tyler snaps, poking his finger into Jake’s chest. 

“Yeah? And he’s waited two years for this conversation, to finally get closure. They need this. And if you interrupt it, so help me God.” Jake says as he pushes his brother towards the couch. Jake takes the hint, sitting as Javi hesitantly follows suit. After a few moments of awkward silence, Kate clears her throat, catching Tyler’s eye. She jerks her head to his brother and he shakes his head. She does it again, causing Pete to glance up at her. 

“Are you okay, kid?” 

“Tyler.” She crosses her arms. “You know she doesn’t want you to leave it like this.” 

Jake’s eyes flicker up at her, giving her an eery sense of deja vu. It had been a strange adjustment, seeing a carbon copy of a person they all knew and loved, but yet acted so different. Whereas Tyler was rough around the edges, thick cowboy country accent and swear words that would make milk curdle and friends with everyone, ever the life of the party, Jake had kept a lot to himself the night before. He held himself together, never in anyway that would indicate cracks in his well-maintained image. She saw him let loose a few times with his friends, eager to hear about your and Tyler’s lives, and always polite to the Wranglers but there was a certain detachment from it all that Tyler lacked. 

“Tyler, I am sorry.” Tyler grunts, crossing his arms. Jake sighs before trying again. “For all of it. Genuinely. I know you’re thinking I’m real selfish right about now and I’m thinking it too. I’m sure she didn’t let up to the worst of it and I’m really sorry about all of it. But I didn’t call you for some sick or twisted reason of hurting her. I called you here because you’re my brother and I want you here. I want you to see this life that I’ve built for myself, cause I’m finally happy, and I- I want to share it with you.”

“Oh, you mean the life you were too busy building to come to our grandparents funeral? Some life.” Tyler scoffs. 

Jake’s shoulders fall. “Ty, I’m sorry.” He whispers. “You’re my brother, you were my best friend, and there hasn’t been a day that goes by that I don’t regret stepping up when it mattered. No stupid trophy or promotion was ever worth losing you.”

Tyler swallows, letting out a deep breath but doesn’t say anything further and Jake clearly accepts that that’s all he’s going to get out of him. He turns to Kate. “Is she happy? With you?” 

“Yes.” Javi blurts out. “So happy.” 

She peers down at her friend, who has a rapidly growing sheepish grin on his scarlet face. “The way you say that makes it sound like we aren’t happy.” 

“Just have to make the point.” 

She gives an exaggerated roll of her eyes. “You’re ridiculous.” She turns back to Jake and Bradley. “Yeah, yeah she really is happy.” 

“Does this mean I can go back to watching the Wranglers streams now or am I gonna get yelled at again? Cause now that you think about it, we all kinda gaslit Coyote.” Fanboy calls from across the kitchen. Tyler turns, giving the boy a curious look. 

“What?” 

“Mickey used to watch your guys streams until I started appearing in them.” You comment, appearing next to Kate. She jumps a little, taking you in. Your face has the remnants of tears, voice raw, but there’s a lack of weight in your body she’s been seeing you carry ever since she’s known you. You wrap your arms around one of Kate’s leaning your head on your shoulder after setting a plastic tub on the ground. “They all convinced him,” You say, jerking your head towards your ex. “That he was losing his mind. Also, how come my errands never get to just be my errands? What part of stay in the car until I got back did we not understand?” 

-

“I tried to stop them, really I did.” Kate protests. You let out a quiet laugh, hiding your face in the back of her shirt. 

“Have T and Jake made up?” You say quietly. She shakes her head and you sigh.  

“Tyler-“

“No, and we’re leaving.” Tyler says, cutting you off as he pushes himself off the couch. “With the way Boone drives they’re probably halfway to Vegas by now.” 

“That’s physically not possible.” Kate mutters and you snort. 

“Tyler, I don’t want you to leave things like this.” 

“That’s not your choice.” Tyler says gruffly, stalking to the front door. Both you and Kate wince as he slams it. 

“I don’t know where he thinks he’s going, I still have the keys.” You say, finally letting go of Kate. “It’s my car anyways.” You mutter under your breath before sighing. “Anyways, we should really be on the road because Boone’s probably stopped at the alien tourist stop in Bakersfield by now.” 

“If Tyler complains about traffic again, can we take a group vote to leave him on the side of the road?” Javi asks as he cranes his head up at you. 

“We’re not leaving Tyler on the side of the road.” Kate says with a tired sigh. 

“Even if he walks to Vegas?” Javi protests earning a tired laugh from you. 

“Okay Kate, will you drive?” She nods as you hand her the keys, Javi standing up from the couch. “Javi, take that.” You say, pointing to the box. “I’m going to be out in just a minute.”

You wait for the door to shut behind them before turning to Jake. “Okay Jake, you can have your real hug now.” He grins as you pull him into a hug. “Don’t worry about him. It’ll take time.” 

“I’m sure with a couple hours trapped in a car with you, he’ll cave and call.” Jake says softly, forced humor in the words. 

(It would take three weeks, an incessantly annoying three weeks on your part, before Ty got so frustrated with you he’d called Jake while sitting on top of his truck on the ranch in Arkansas. You’re still not sure what they talked about, what was said, but by the end of the week, Tyler walked into the house with a wedding invitation on fancy card stock Tyler teased Jake endlessly for.) 

“Don’t be so hard on yourself, though.” You say, squeezing him. “Let bygones by bygones. I have.” 

He hums. “Take care of yourself.” 

Bradley gives you a brief hug. “I’m glad you’re happy and safe kid. That’s all I would’ve ever wanted for you.” 

“Hope you weren’t too hard on Jake.” 

“No more than the normal amount.” 

“The normal amount is zero.” 

Bradley laughs. “You’re being more fair to him than he deserves, hope you know that.”

“Something something time space therapy.”

You reach your arms out for Pete and he stands up, giving you a grin, as Bradley laughs harder. “Don’t do anything out there that I would do.” 

You laugh. “No promises.” You pad over to Mickey, giving him a tight hug. “If you ever decide you get tired of the pilot life and want to become a storm chaser, you let me know.” Mickey laughs. 

“You’ll have to unblock me first.” You cringe at the reminder and pat his back. 

“Done. You take care of yourself.” He gives you a two finger salute, letting you step back. 

You turn back to Javy, who’s mostly kept to himself through the whole conversation. “Come here you.” He looks surprised you’re offering him another hug, but he returns it nonetheless. “You be safe out there, you hear me.” 

“Yes ma’am.” He whispers. “Don’t get sucked up into a tornado.” 

“I’ll try my hardest. And uh, really do think about my Elle suggestion.”

You both linger for a minute longer before eventually he pulls away. “You sure that’s all you want to take?”

You shrug. “Yeah, I got what I need out there. Sell the rest of the stuff, make a quick buck off of me. It’s the least I can do.”

He chuckles, shaking his head. “Sounds like a deal. Uh, can I walk you to the door?” You nod and he trails behind you quietly. “So this is uh, really goodbye.” 

“Seems like it.” 

“I’m uh, really happy you found what you’re looking for. I can only hope I’ll find it someday.”

“You will.” You say quietly. “I’m really sorry it didn’t work out between us.” 

“It’s for the better it seems.” 

You nod. “Well-“ You clear your throat. “Goodbye Javy.” 

The door shut behinds you with a soft thud. You sigh, padding across the wet grass as you slip in the seat next to Kate. As she pulls away from the curb, Javi asks how you’re feeling. 

“It’s stupid.” You mumble. “But I keep thinking of this Taylor Swift lyric.” 

“Not this again.” Tyler mutters and through the rear view mirror you can see Javi flick his ear. 

“What is it?” Kate asks softly. 

“It’s just this one line — what a valiant roar, what a bland goodbye. It’s just odd, I think. I did really love him at one point and I did really think maybe I’d spend the rest of my life with him, that those would be my best days. And it all just kind of ends here.” You sigh, settling back into your seat. “But- I don’t know. I’m not mad about how it all happened, I guess. It lead me here.” 

Tyler lifts his chin, giving you a soft yet sincere smile through the rearview mirror. “And we’re happy to have you here.” 

-

“So,” Kate starts from the balcony of your Vegas hotel room. Your friends are fast asleep inside, all piled somewhere on the beds pushed together. You’re pretty sure when you left, Boone had pushed himself in between Tyler and Javi and was snoring. “I’ve been sort of- I kind of have something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about.” 

You glance at your girlfriend. “Yeah?”

She nods. “Last night, when Javi and Boone left cause of the bad feeling they got- they weren’t the only ones who felt that. It kinda made me sick, hearing them talk about you like that, and thinking about the fact that you might actually do it. That you might remember that you liked your life there better and leave Oklahoma.” She takes a sharp breath. “Leave me.”

“Kate-“ 

“I know I’m not really the best at- at always showing you how much you mean to me, that sometimes I get caught up in chasing the storm, in actually making it all mean something, that I forgot about how great of a thing I have. I’m trying really hard not to take it for granted, because I did once and I can’t- I can’t go through that again. To lose you would be one of the greatest losses of my life.” 

“Kate, I love you. You aren’t gonna lose me, I’m not going anywhere. I only want to be with you, there isn’t any other life for me except for the one right next to you.” 

She reached up, brushing away an eyelash that had fallen onto your cheek. “I think I’m sort of starting to understand that now.” She reaches out for your hand. “Listen, I‘ve sort of- sort of been keeping my eye on some places going up for sale in Sapulpa. I know my Mom doesn’t mind having us around but I think maybe it’s time we give her back her peace and quiet.”

“Kate…”

She reaches a hand up, tucking a hair behind your ear. “We can keep the barn as home base but I found this really cute place for not too bad of a price while we were driving out here. I sort of scheduled a tour with the realtor for the day after next.” She’s wearing a soft, cautious smile.

“Kate,” Your breath hitches. “Kate Carter, are you asking me to move in with you? Are you asking me to buy a house with you?”

She gives a sort of nonchalant shrug. “If that’s what you want.” 

“I- Yes, of course that’s what I want!” You exclaim, belatedly realizing you may wake your friends. Well, not Boone at least, who sleeps like the dead. Your voice drops considerably. “Yes, yes I would love that.” 

Kate gives you a grin, reaching out to tug on the elastic band of your pajama pants to bring you closer to her. You laugh, colliding into her. Your hands brace yourself on her shoulders as Kate smiles wider than you think you’ve ever seen her. 

“I love you so much.” She whispers. “How lucky am I.”

“I hope it’s like this forever.” You say softly. “I know, there’s no guarantee and eventually, they’ll find other things. But I hope it’s always this easy, you know? Not just with us but with them too you know? They might not be the Wranglers forever but I hope they’re our family forever.” You say, turning your head to look at your friends through the glass. 

You feel the outline of Kate’s smile on your cheek. “They will be. I promise. No matter where we all go, they’ll still be here. Can’t take the home out of Oklahoma, right?”

[coff33andb00ks]

where i come from - LS

pairing: logan sargeant x fem!reader (lilli. it's lilli) summary: hitch a ride to the end of the highway where the neons turn to wood word count: 1.2k a.n.: the first of three small fics for my beloved Lilli @maxlarens Happy birthday my darling!! I hope you enjoy this little love letter to you (and to american road trips). inspo: all the road trip songs my family blasted during my childhood, compiled here warnings: it's not a waffle house it's a waffle home, author is in love with american south almost as much as Lilli's in love with Logan

"Logan, you can't be serious."

He laughs, parking the car next to a slightly bent light pole. "What? You want to see America, right?"

You press your lips together, staring at the small, flat building that looks as though it's been in that spot since the 1960s and hasn't been refurbished once. "This is America?"

"One of the best parts," he promises, climbing out. The balmy air of Florida immediately makes the car's cold air disappear and you sigh, unbuckling your seatbelt as he walks around to open the door for you.

"A Waffle House is America?"

"Trust me," he says. "You'll understand."

You do trust him, so you let him take your hand, sweat beading before you've taken two steps across the parking lot. There's a crowd of people near the door and you feel their eyes on you and Logan as you approach, the air thick with humidity and weed and tobacco smoke.

The interior is worse than the exterior. Your sandals slide with each step on the ancient tile floor and you can feel the grease in the restaurant. A bored server is leaning against a booth and hands you and Logan menus as you walk by, telling you to sit wherever. You want to turn around and go sit in the car, but…

Logan looks so fucking happy.

So you sit in a booth with him, ignoring the sticky spot on the bench that catches the material of your shorts. You ignore the faint aroma of tobacco smoke that lingers in the dining area. You ignore the yelling from the kitchen staff and the argument starting up between a couple at the counter.

The food is pure American stereotype. Sweet, greasy, and the portions enormous. But your first bite of the burger has you smiling. Because—

"Oh my god," you practically moan.

Across from you, Logan's grinning.

The server is pure southern charm as soon as she hears your accent, and you relax as you enjoy a meal big enough to last you an entire day. It's not great but it's good, and the atmosphere seems to shift.

He buys you a mug, telling you under his breath about a time his brother stole one because apparently everyone does that. Once outside in the sweltering heat, he pulls you in and kisses the top of your head. "Welcome to America."

The road trip was his idea. It's the best way to see this land he loves so much and because you love him so much you agreed, and after a week with his family you're driving out of the Florida panhandle, the windows down and the music blasting, both of you singing Sweet Home Alabama at the top of your lungs.

He takes an exit off the interstate and you're already lost but he's content, speeding along unmarked country roads, past lush forests and rolling fields. He has to slow to a crawl for tractors, and every time a car passes he waves like the other person is an old friend.

Left or right? at every stop sign. No map, no GPS, just a whim.

A tiny shop – gas station, babe, not a shop – in the middle of nowhere is selling fresh peaches and the woman is so sweet and talkative you want to stay and talk all day. Her great aunt makes those crochet blankets you're admiring and before you know it you've got three draped over your arms.

"Where y'all headed?" she's asking as Logan pays.

He shrugs, smiling that bashful smile that made you fall in love with him. "Nowhere, really."

She gives the vaguest yet most detailed directions to a motel – you're gonna wanna drive thataway til you see the old rusted school bus? Then take a left and keep driving til you pass the turnoff for the highway. It's down on the right. If you get to the stoplight you done went too far – and Logan gives you a look as you bite into a fresh Georgia peach.

You smile.

More rolling fields and woods. Farms and family homes and kids on swings. He gets to the stoplight and you both laugh all the way back to the motel.

It's tiny and has almost zero amenities but it's clean and the window overlooks a small field of wildflowers. You take a shower and when you come out there's a jar with a bunch of wildflowers in it and you smile at him. You've been smiling so much the past couple days that your cheeks ache.

He finds a place to get dinner and you feast on what he says is pretty okay bbq but you think is the best you've ever tasted.

The next day you're better prepared, and you fully enjoy the rambling tour of the countryside, relaxing with each passing mile. Feet on the dash, singing along to Fleetwood Mac and Tom Petty and Creedence Clearwater Revival. Songs that are familiar and songs that he knows every word to and you are still learning.

Lunch is a picnic, thrown together with gas station sandwiches and bags of chips, sitting on one of the blankets you bought yesterday by a river. You want to enjoy the scenery, because it is as beautiful as he always told you it was, but all you can focus on is him.

He looks so happy. You've seen him happy, of course, but lately he's been downtrodden. Anxious. And you sit there, watching him as he talks about maybe making it up into North Carolina by sundown, seeing how relaxed he is.

And you fall a little in love with this spot of the world that heals him.

"You love it here," you say softly after a bit of silence.

Logan nods, looking out to the river where it disappears into the trees. "I do."

"I'm—"

"I love sharing it with you more."

Oh. Oh. Your eyes are burning and it's not fair that he can drop the sweetest lines when you least expect them even though by now you should expect them because he always does and—

"Lilli?"

You blink and he's moved to sit right in front of you. "Logan?"

Why does he look worried? Your mind scrambles, thinking something must be wrong. He feels ill, or he just spotted some venomous snake slithering nearby or—

He shifts and you glance down, seeing the ring sparkling in his hand.

Later you'll remember every word he says. How his hand shakes and his voice wavers while he tells you how much he loves you and how happy you make him. But for now all you hear is the river splashing over rocks and birds twittering and the breeze ruffling the leaves of the oak tree. And all you can see his eyes, shining and bright and beautiful.

There's hot sauce on his fingers and yours are gritty with salt. His lips taste of salt and vinegar and there's an ant crawling on your leg, and he's apologizing for not giving you some grand proposal, but you don't care. You're glad he asked you here.

"I love you," he whispers, forehead resting against yours and you feel the sigh that exhales his worries.

He worried that you'd say no. As if yes wasn't on your lips before he said the words.

"I love you, Logie."

[l3irdl3rain]

Does the mother of those tiny little guys have a name or is she just The Mother

The mother is Lilly. Her litter is named after breakfast foods, so the babies are Bacon, Pancake, and Waffles.

Ironically, The Flat One is named Waffles and not Pancake. But to me she is just The Flat One

[3archangelsaints]

ASK: I'd like to read something about Simon, please, counseling his teenage son perhaps, with reader. He's probably been in a fight and when he gets home in finds reader putting a band aid on some of his wounds. The rest is up to your imagination, thank you! ✨ I love what you write!

A/N: Sorry this is kinda rushed but it inspired me and itched my brain

Tommy was the oldest son, and he was often like a replica of Simon, which you adored. He'd always been a bit big for his size, at 6'4 at 16 he's tall and muscular from his workouts with Simon. He's honestly a duplicate of Simon in so many ways, but to his younger sister, he often acts like you in the way he cares for her. Lillie was his 14 year old sister, and they went to school together, Lillie was a lot more soft spoken than Tommy. One day after school, Tommy and Lillie were walking home together, unlike usual, Lillie wasn't waffling on about her usual book she'd been reading.

--- She stormed up to her room, chucking her bag on the bottom of the stairs. You looked confused. "Tommy, is she okay?"

He shook his, kissing your cheek. "Don't know, she's been weird all day." You brushed his dirty blonde hair. "Look out for her, for me." "Always do mum." You nod, hugging him. "Where's dad?" "He's in contact with a dog breeder, might have to foster a few dogs again." You clean the table, "I'm thinking of getting you and Lillie a dog each." "Why?" You laugh, "Sound just like your father." He scoffs. "I'll go check on her." You reassure him. --- A few hours later you finally come out of Lillie's room, finally comforting her to sleep, Simon is finally home and he's exhausted, not having had any sleep last night. "Simon." You say softly, leaning into his warm embrace, he kisses you sweetly. "Shhh... I know, Tommy said." He comforts you, knowing how you are and that you'll stress about your kids endlessly. The next morning Simon is cooking a full English breakfast for everyone, whilst you spend the morning braiding Lillie's hair, getting her ready for school. --- It was during school when it broke out, the fight, Tommy punched a guy in his year. He'd dropped to the floor quickly. No one snitched about what happened to the teachers. Lillie hugged Tommy when they were walking home together. "Did he touch you?" He asked. Lillie just sobbed crying. Thomas was so alike to his dad in the way if anyone fucked with his father he felt a strong urge to kill. ---

"What happened?" You snatched his right hand, noticing the skin breakage, then looking at Lillie's red and puffy eyes. "Sit both of you." Both Thomas and Lillie sit down. You went and grabbed the medkit. "Lillie - now, what happened?" You begin disinfecting his knuckles as Lillie sniffles. "A guy in Tommy's year - he - followed me into the bathroom and he-" Your heart pounded and everything became a blur, the thought of someone hurting your baby girl made you sick. "Mum." Tommy's voice brought you out of your daze. "Did you punch him?" You ask, as you wrap his knuckles. "Course." You smile, tears falling, you kiss his wrapped knuckled and sit beside Lillie pulling her to lie down in your lap as you play with her hair. Lillie falls asleep and Tommy carries her to bed, and you two sit back down on the sofa. "Did you two fight?" "One punch and he was out like a light." "Your father - he -" "If I didn't do it, he would've done it to be fair."

---

When Simon comes home, he notices every little detail. "What happened?" You wipe your tears. "Someone touched Lillie, so I punched him." "Damn fucking right." He goes to his cupboard opening his expensive bourbon, pouring Tommy a glass. "Where is she?" "Upstairs-" He's storming up the stairs and waking Lillie, next thing you hear are sobs, Lillie's sobs. Your heart breaks, but she walks down with her father, clinging to him. "We are ordering Lillie's favourite and we're drinking. She's old enough." You grab glasses as Tommy orders take away, you drink and giggle, hugging your children together. Before you're blurting out information about the guy and his family. "What? Did some digging about him... not the first time he did something like that, he's changed 3 schools last 2 years." Lillie smiles softly, nodding. "Lovie, calm down, me and Tommy are going to his family tomorrow to talk." Simon coddles Lillie sweetly. --- You and Lillie sleep cuddled together. Your arms wrapped tightly around her. She gets up to go school, but you ask her if she wants to stay home. "No, wanna go school." She says sleepy. You nod and get up. Helping her. Tommy and Simon, are already out, and you shake your head hoping they're okay. "They're fine mum." She reassures you. "Are you?" "I will be." Your eyes water and you nod at her resilient behaviour. She was so gorgeous and intelligent. You kiss her temple. "He touches you I will castrate him, already got the new electric knife." You say lowly, frowning. "Don't go." You whisper in her ear. "Please, you need time okay? Stay at home." Her eyes water and she nods.

[seireiteihellbutterfly]

Looks like May is Megumi month! We have:

Unconventional Flowers Event - Mother's Day lillies with Megumi - posting Friday night pst

Sundae Tropes Event - Waffle cone with Megumi fluff - being written

Megumi (aged up) pregnancy angst done!

[arandomexistantbeing]

Hello ! I am back with some drawings of my au again ! I've been really busy with my studies lately, so I'm sorry for not really being active .

So now here are the drawings

This is my first time drawing wings , so now we have my Red Velvet ( Dragon) Cookie ...

I also tried to draw Black Raisins Cookie

She has a waffle arm !

... This other outfit looks weird tho ...

Finally ... I drew my Golden Cheese Cookie !!

The wings are so bad drawn ...

...

( h.c : she created the internet over there )

...

And a little more , we also have ...

Ooooooohhhhh, ghost Choco ....

Lilly lock , that's all I can say...

( the image is upside down 🥲 )

...

A little bonus

+ my oc

Well that's all for now ! 😐 I hope you enjoyed !

( forgive me , my drawings are so weird ... )

[yjano]

Never The Same.

Part 14.

Pairings: Jake x Mc.

Warnings: Swearing, violence, angst, smut, other pairings;), traumatic experiences.

Words: 5.6k

Author's note: Honestly, this story is going to be a big piece of work and a lot of angst. It's not connected to the game at all. Because I always want to try something new and newer. Read it only if you're into angst stories, please. Thank you and let's go!🩶

A smile made its way onto my face as I and Lex were going from shop to shop. The two of us had decided that we needed some new clothes and after a bit of begging from Lex's side, Jake had agreed to let me come with her to the mall today. The fact that the two of us had four big bodyguards with us didn't matter to us all.

Jake had told Lex that he would only allow me to go out if we took some protection with us and thus Lex had arranged just that. What Jake wanted Jake got.

"That shirt you got is so pretty Mc, I bet Jake can't keep his hands off of you once he sees you wearing it," Lex spoke in an amused tone as she watched how I became shy. A red blush began to form on my face as I smiled back at her.

Nobody knew about the things that I had done together with Jake and I wasn't planning on telling anyone. Jessy and Lex surely wouldn't be able to keep their mouth shut and it wouldn't take long before everyone would know about the two of us and our nightly activities. No, this was something private and only meant for Jake and me to know.

Suddenly a loud grumble left my belly and immediately my eyes grew big. I hadn't been feeling too well this morning and thus I had decided to skip my breakfast. It wasn't weird that my body was now craving some food.

I needed food to keep my system running and my body was telling me that fact. A soft laugh left Lex's mouth and she slowly shook her head.

"I guess it's time to eat something hmm?" She spoke before she took my hand in her own and began to drag me towards one of the restaurants nearby. Soon our eyes fell upon a small waffle shop and once the two of us walked closer a delicious smell began to infiltrate our nostrils.

A waffle sounded like a very good plan right now. As the two of us were making our way toward the waffle shop suddenly a high-pitched voice sounded through the mall.

"Mc!" A familiar voice shouted and the moment I turned around to look at who it was that was calling me, the familiar face of my very best friend came into view.

"Lilly." I softly whispered before tears began to form in my eyes. I missed Lilly so much. The girl had been my best friend ever since I had moved to Duskwood and she had been my number one supporter, in any case, I had done.

The fact that I hadn't seen her for a few months now absolutely broke my heart and I wanted nothing more than to take my best friend into a hug and never let go.

As soon as Lilly noticed how I turned around when she screamed my name tears began to form in the girl's eyes and a small smile began to form on her face.

Ever since Mc had been kidnapped Lilly had visited the Duskwood Police at least once a week to ask about any progress on her missing friend. The police were still looking for Mc and while everyone who had brains would understand that she could be considered lost forever somehow Lilly couldn't give up on looking for her best friend.

The moment Lilly began to run towards me one of the bodyguards stepped in between the two of us and blocked our view of each other completely. Immediately I began to walk a bit more to the side to get past the guard and engulf Lilly in a big hug but suddenly Lex grabbed my hand and pulled me back a bit.

"Mc, don't." She softly spoke while shaking her head a bit. A confused look made its way onto my face and I looked at Lex with a questioning look in my eyes.

"What do you mean?"

A deep sigh then left Lex's mouth and she looked at the back of the big bodyguard that was separating me from Lilly at that very moment.

"Don't drag her into this world with you. She can't know anything about us or Jake won't hesitate to make sure she will never see the light of day again." Lex explained while she looked at me with a sad look on her face.

"I know how much she means to you but giving in to your desire now and letting her come close to you is practically the same as signing her death certificate. Jake won't let her get away if that meant that she could tell anyone some secret information about you, me, or anyone who is tied to his business."

Immediately my eyes grew big and I began to shake my head softly.

"He wouldn't do that to her. He wouldn't hurt me like that, right?" I spoke in an unsure tone. Jake had been through in the beginning but he had truly done a one-eighty when it came to his behavior. Jake was nice now, right?

"Just because Jake acts nice and sweet towards you, doesn't mean that he is like that to anybody else. I know a different side of him Mc and trust me when I say that you don't want that side of him to ever meet your friends." Lex then spoke in a serious tone toward me. She then began to tuck at my hand softly before she gestured for the two of us to go the other way.

"Let's just leave, okay? It's better for everyone that way."

Immediately tears began to form in my eyes again and I softly whispered a 'Sorry.' before I turned around and walked away with Lex and the other three bodyguards. It pained me so much to be so close to Lilly and yet not have the opportunity to hug her and tell her about my life these last past few months.

I couldn't risk her life like that however, that wouldn't be fair to her. She never asked anyone to drag her into the world of guns drugs and death. As soon as Lilly saw me walk away tears began to stream down her cheeks.

"Mc!" She screamed at the top of her lungs but I didn't react again. A loud sob left her mouth as she saw how I turned around a corner and disappeared out of her sight completely. Would the two of us ever be reunited again?

~

A sad look could be spotted on my face as I dropped myself onto the couch in the living room. After months of not being able to see my best friend, I had finally gotten a glimpse of her beautiful face again. Unfortunately, however, I hadn't been able to hug the girl or even talk to her for a little while.

After months I had still gotten nothing, except a glimpse of her tear-struck face and that fact broke me even more. She had tried everything in her power to see me and hug me and all I had been able to do was walk away without looking in her direction again.

I lately had begun to miss my friends and family more and more and the fact that once again I had missed a chance to give at least one of those people a hug hurt me, a lot.

It also angered me a bit, because even though I knew damn well that I couldn't drag them down the same road I had taken all I wished for was to see them again and talk to them again. I missed them to the point where I got angry at everyone around me, including myself.

An apologetic smile made its way onto Lex's face as she dropped my bags next to the couch. Of course, Lex knew damn well who that girl in the mall had been. She had been with me for the first time she had ever met me in person. Lilly was someone who meant a lot to me and anyone who failed to see that would be blind.

"I'm sorry Mc but I only did what any good friend would have done." Lex softly spoke to me. I however didn't react at all and ignored her completely. I didn't want to hear any of it right now. Sure this had been the only right option but that didn't make my broken heart heal.

How would Lex have felt if she wouldn't be able to see her best friend in months and then see a glimpse of her only for them to be ripped away immediately again?

"I'll let Jake know we're home again." Lex softly spoke to me before turning around and walking further into the apartment. As soon as she was completely out of sight a deep sigh left my mouth and I briefly closed my eyes.

I hated the fact that Lex made me stop going to my best friend. Of course, I knew that she had been right and I would have been a complete fool if I had refused to listen to her but that didn't mean that I liked it.

I had wanted to hug Lilly, tell her about everything that had happened the past couple of months, and ask her how she was doing. Things that sounded so normal yet were impossible for the two of us to ever achieve.

"Hi, baby." A deep voice suddenly sounded in my ear. Immediately goosebumps began to form all over my body and my heart skipped a beat.

Nevertheless, I kept a sad look on my face and the thought of my crying best friend wouldn't leave my mind.

"Lex told me you were sad before she left. What happened?"

"I saw my best friend today but Lex didn't let me speak to her or even give her a hug." I then spoke in a bitter tone. Of course, Lex couldn't help this situation at all and it was in no way her fault but right now I just needed someone to be the culprit.

Lex had been with me and thus she would be my victim. I needed someone to blame it all on as long as I was sad and mad at the same time.

"Yeah, she told me about what happened." Jake then answered with a serious look on his face.

"Lex was right you know. You can't drag her into this world." He then spoke before walking around the couch and sitting down next to me.

Slowly the sad look on my face began to turn into an angry one and I began to raise an eyebrow. Did Jake think I was stupid? Of course, I knew damn well that Lilly didn't belong in this world.

Hell, I didn't even belong in this world myself, and yet here I was. None of this was ever meant to happen and yet I was into this shit shoulder-deep.

"You think I don't know that I can't see her as long as I'm trapped here?" I suddenly exclaimed in an angry tone. I stood up from the couch before I angrily began to walk back and forth in front of the couch.

"I'm not stupid you know, I have functioning brains in my head!"

"I didn't fucking speak to her because I care about her, because you will come for her if I did!" I then spat to Jake, anger still lacing my voice. I felt completely hot from all the anger that was radiating from me.

I hated my life here if that meant that I couldn't see Lilly. I hated Lex for making me stop going to her and I hated Jake for taking me here in the first place. Why did everything have to be so damn complicated all the time?

<THE SLIGHT PART OF THIS CONTAINS SMUT, IF YOU ARE UNCOMFORTABLE READING IT PLEASE SCROLL DOWN A BIT. I POINTED IT OUT TO WHERE THE SMUT PART ENDS.>

As Mc was getting angrier and angrier Jake slowly became more and more annoyed by the tone in which she was screaming at him. He didn't tolerate anyone using a tone like that towards him and the girl in front of him was no exception to that fact. She needed to know who was the boss around here and if she had forgotten then Jake would gladly help her remember. Nobody talked to Jake Dalton like that.

Jake poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue before he stood up and looked at me with an angry look on his face. His whole aura had turned dark and power was practically radiating off of his body.

"I don't like you talking to me like that baby," Jake spoke in a low tone to me.

As soon as I noticed the change in Jake's aura I gulped visibly but then looked at him with a challenged look. I was still angry and Jake trying to get me to submit again was not something I was going to do. I was angry and I needed to let my anger out or else I would feel sad all day.

"I don't fucking care," I answered him in a challenging tone while a serious look on my face.

Immediately the look on Jake's face darkened even more and he slowly began to walk toward me before harshly pushing me against the wall.

"Behave baby, or I'll make you." He whispered inside my ear and immediately my heart skipped a beat. Even though I knew Jake was dead serious I couldn't help but get excited by the way he was acting. This whole demeanor was something I liked a lot.

A challenging look crossed my features once again and I leaned in slightly before licking his lips seductively. Then I locked eyes with him while a smirk began to form on my face.

"Make me."

As soon as those words left my lips Jake slammed his lips on my lips and immediately the two of us got entangled into a heavy make-out session. Even though I was trying my best to not let Jake completely dominate me, it was very difficult for me.

Jake wasn't taking anything I was doing and every time I tried to get the upper hand in our kiss. Jake would make me submit to him immediately again. Jake hadn't been joking when he said that he would make me behave but I didn't care. If anything, I liked where this was going.

As soon as Jake detached our lips he grabbed my hair and pulled it a bit to the side.

"Don't test me, baby. I will make sure you'll regret it." He spoke in a dangerously low voice before connecting his lips with the skin of my neck.

Immediately he bit down on the skin and a shot of pain rushed up my spine. Nevertheless, I began to feel more and more excited and thus when I felt how Jake slowly let go of the skin between his teeth I let out a low moan, on purpose. Let's see how long the two of us could keep this game up.

As soon as the sinful sound that had just been released from my mouth was heard by Jake, he immediately began to harshly suck and lick the skin underneath his lips. I had to remember who he was and that he would not let anyone fuck around with him. He was the boss.

I seemed to be in a bold state and when I began to feel how Jake was creating a hickey on my skin a smirk made its way onto my face.

"Is that all you got?" I spoke in a challenging tone and before I knew it I felt Jake lift my head before looking me in the eyes.

Seductively I began to bite my bottom lip before I eyed him from the bottom to the top. Then I leaned in a bit before that challenging look in my eyes began to take me over once again.

"I must say, I've had better." I then whispered against his lips in a low seductive tone before increasing the distance between our lips again.

A low growl made its way out of Jake's mouth and his eyes visibly darkened before he pressed me harshly against the wall. A soft thud sounded through the room as my back once more collided with the white walls of Jake's apartment and a smirk began to form on my face.

Of course, what I had told him had been complete bullshit. I had sex with one other person and that time it had been absolute shit but that didn't matter right now. Jake's ego was already big enough, I didn't need it to get any bigger.

"Last time I held back. Guess you want to be receiving that kind of special treatment today." Jake spoke before a smirk began to form on his face. Before I knew it Jake had moved both his hands down and began to unbutton the black blouse I was wearing.

"I'm gonna make you feel so good you won't be able to stand on your legs anymore." He then spoke once he had unbuttoned all of the buttons. Immediately after speaking, he lowered his head and attached his lips to one of my nipples while he began to tease the other one with his hand.

A high-pitched moan unwillingly left my mouth and immediately after that, I slapped my hand in front of my mouth. I shouldn't make all these sounds if I wanted to show Jake that he wasn't the only one who could tease me.

As Jake began to lick, twist and softly bite the sensitive nipple. I couldn't help but let a small moan escape my lips every once in a while. Jake knew exactly what he had to do to make me make sound after sound and even though I was doing everything in my power to keep the moans in, I couldn't.

Soon however I felt how Jake suddenly left both my nipples alone before he harshly grabbed both my hands and slammed them against the wall.

"Don't hold them in baby. I want to hear you scream my name when I fuck you." He then spoke in a dominant tone before he moved my arms up and began to pin them both against the wall with one of his hands while the other one began to unbutton my shorts.

It didn't take long before my blue shorts fell from my hips and before I knew it Jake began to rub me through my panties while attaching our lips. While he began to speed up the pace at which he was kissing me, he began to increase the pressure with which he was rubbing me and it didn't take long before another moan left my lips.

As I began to softly moan in our kiss Jake quickly pushed down my panties before he released my hands from the wall and picked me up before pressing me against the wall once again. An excited feeling began to spread through my body more and more with everything he did to me. Jake was slowly driving me insane and I loved every bit of it.

Soon Jake held two fingers in front of my mouth and immediately I opened my mouth before I began to eagerly suck on them. I knew damn well what Jake wanted me to do and I wasn't going to put up a fight anymore. As I was getting wetter, I became needier and needier and thus we played for long enough. It was time to get to the real deal.

After a minute of my sucking and licking Jake's fingers, Jake took them out of my mouth again before moving them under me once again. Quickly he steadied me when I was still holding up against the wall before he began to circle my entrance with one of his fingers.

A loud yelp left my mouth as soon as I began to feel him push the first finger inside of me and immediately I locked eyes with Jake who was widely smirking.

As soon as the first finger was inside me, Jake pushed another in before he began to move them in and out of my hole at a fast pace.

"F-fuck!" I moaned loudly once he began to curl his fingers a bit and hit my sweet spot. Immediately after a rush of excitement shot up my spine and I looked at him with a pleading look.

"Fuck me, Jake, please," I spoke in a desperate tone and a big smirk began to form on Jake's face.

.

Jake focus.

.

No way that I was gonna grant her wishes now that she was asking for them. She had wanted to play a game and thus I would show her how it was played.

"You've been not so nice to me baby. I guess I'll continue teasing you a bit longer." I spoke against her lips before I slammed my fingers into her sweet spot again.

"O-oh, god!" She moaned loudly before she grabbed my shoulders and began to bury her nails in them.

A soft hiss left my mouth once I felt her painfully press her nails into my shoulders but a low chuckle also left my mouth. Mc was slowly losing control and only I could help her with it. Too bad she had to be a brat before, otherwise, I would have granted her wishes a long time ago.

"You want me to fuck you, doll?" I softly whispered in her ear before pressing a soft kiss right beneath it. Immediately Mc began to whine softly while she was nodding her head.

"Then show me how much you want it." I softly spoke before dropping her on the ground again and watching her shake a bit on her legs. Immediately after she gained her balance back though she dropped to her knees and began to unbutton my jeans before pushing them down, my underwear following right after.

As soon as she pulled them down, Mc softly wrapped a hand around my member before bringing it to her mouth. The brunette innocently looked up before taking my member into her mouth completely and began to bob her head up and down.

A low moan left my mouth as I noticed the beautiful brunette sucking me so obediently and a smirk began to form on my face. It was as clear as crystal now who had the upper hand out of the two of us.

As Mc was fastening the pace at which she was sucking me off, more and more sounds left me. Soon I told her to stop before I picked her up again and pressed her back to the wall. Soon after Mc's eyes grew big as she felt my tip poke at her entrance before I began to push it in completely.

A few tears began to form in her eyes as soon as she felt herself getting stretched and she slowly began to breathe in and out to ease the pain. As soon as I noticed how Mc was struggling to cope with the pain from having me inside of her, I began to softly kiss her lovingly.

Once Mc felt the soft touch of my lips against her own, she wrapped her arms around my neck before softly kissing me back. I slowly began to move in and out of her.

As I was slowly testing how used she was to have me inside of her hole. I slowly began to thrust it in her faster and faster. It didn't take long before Mc was bouncing up and down against the wall while moan after moan left her mouth.

.

Mc focus.

.

A loud moan escaped my lips as soon as Jake hit my sweet spot full force. My eyes grew big and a pleasurable feeling shot through my whole body. Jake had found my sweet spot once again and I loved every bit of it.

"Don't stop-" I moaned once again as Jake hit my sweet spot another time and he began to smirk before he began to speed up the pace at which he was fucking me.

"Don't worry baby, I wasn't planning on doing so anytime soon." He spoke before he thrust his member in once again.

Another jolt of pleasure rushed through my body as my sweet spot got more and more stimulation and before I knew it the familiar feeling of heat began to pool up in my lower area. Immediately my eyes grew big and I tightened my grip around Jake's neck.

"I-I'm close!" I managed to stammer out and as if on cue Jake sped up the pace at which he was fucking me. I had finally given up and submitted myself completely to Jake.

As we were close to our high, we began to eagerly kiss, and before I knew it my body got taken over by pleasure completely.

Jake's body got taken over by pleasure completely as he was trying his best to keep the both of us steady. He slowly filled up me completely.

Once the two of us slowly came down from our high a soft breath of air left my mouth and I locked eyes with Jake once he slowly let me down again. A loving smile was visible on my face as I looked at Jake as if he was the most precious thing I had ever laid my eyes on.

"I love you." I softly spoke before I grabbed his upper arm to steady myself. Immediately Jake noticed how I was having difficulty finding my balance and he grabbed me with both his hands before picking me up bridal style and carrying me to the bathroom for the two of us to clean ourselves up.

"I love you too baby. So fucking much."

<END OF SMUT HERE.>

Uncomfortable. That was the best word to describe my position right now. Yesterday Jake might have been a little too rough on me, which resulted in me now awkwardly shifting in my seat while Jessy was talking to me about some rude guy she had met on the streets.

Currently, I was visiting my friend in her apartment since Jessy had called me this morning to come over because she was bored. Of course, I thought it was going to be fun and thus I agreed immediately. Unfortunately, when I tried to get out of bed I regretted that decision immediately.

Softly I blew on my cup of hot choco while listening to her rambling on and on about the weird man on the streets who had tried to get her number despite her saying multiple times that she had a boyfriend.

A shot of pain rushed up my stomach now and then after I made a move I shouldn't have done and even though I did my absolute best to keep my face as neutral as possible Jessy had now already looked at me twice with a weird look on her face.

It would only be a matter of time before she would catch up on what had happened yesterday. So much for keeping our nightly activities a secret.

"Are you okay Mc?" Jessy asked once she noticed me form a pained expression on my face once again. A concerned look began to form on her face and she softly put a hand on my shoulder.

"You know, I can bring you back home if you don't feel well."

Quickly I shook my head while I created the fakest smile ever on my face.

"No, I'm completely fine, don't worry," I spoke to while trying to sound as convincing as I possibly could. If I would stand up now there would be no way I could hide the fact that I had difficulty walking and then Jessy would know that something was up with me.

"You were telling about the creeper on the streets right?" I tried to change the subject to her story again but once I moved my leg a bit another jolt of pain rushed through my body. Slowly Jessy began to quirk one of her eyebrows before looking at me with a concerned look on her face.

"I was but now I'm more curious as to why you're acting so weird today Mc?" She spoke before looking at me from my toes to my head, trying to spot anything weird on me. Suddenly a big smirk broke out on her face and her mouth began to make an o shape.

"You two fucked!" Jessy exclaimed loudly and immediately my eyes grew big before I began to shush her. A deep red blush began to form on my face and a feeling of shame began to fill my insides. I knew Jessy would find out eventually but I didn't want the whole building to know exactly what I and Jake did when we had some alone time.

"Oh my god give me the details!" Jessy then spoke in an enthusiastic tone while looking at me with an expectant look on her face. A soft sigh left my mouth and I looked her straight in the eyes before giving her some details about yesterday. If I wouldn't give her anything the girl would surely never shut up and then she would truly not be able to keep her mouth shut.

A twinkle could be spotted in her eyes as she was listening to everything I was telling her and a squeal left her mouth now and then. As soon as I was done with my story, a smirk formed on her face once again and she softly squeezed one of my hands.

"Don't worry my friend, I got the perfect solution for when your boyfriend has been too rough on you."

Immediately I began to blush again before softly shaking my head.

"Jake isn't my boyfriend, Jessy," I spoke softly. That was the truth after all, Jake hadn't asked me to be his girlfriend and while the two of us did everything together that couples do that didn't mean that the two of us were anything else than friends with benefits. A soft laugh left Jessy's mouth before she smiled at me.

"Don't worry, he sees you as his girlfriend. Jake doesn't like to use labels but he cares a lot about you. I've known him for a long time and I don't think I've ever seen him treat someone the way he treats you." She spoke in a reassuring tone before standing up and pulling me up too.

A pained expression immediately formed on my face again and a jolt of pain shot up my stomach again. This wasn't something I wanted to experience again. Jessy immediately began to support me while a big grin was visible on her face.

"Whenever Dan has been too rough on me I always take a nice warm bath. It helps a lot to ease the pain." She explained before walking towards the elevator and pressing the button for the doors to open.

Softly I nodded while trying to not think of the pain I was experiencing right now. Jessy would probably be right and if there was any way I could ease the pain I was willing to try it. Anything to get rid of the pain I was feeling right now.

Soon the elevator doors opened and the two of us quickly got in before Jessy pressed the button for Jake's apartment. It didn't take long for the two of us to reach our destined floor and before the two of us knew it we were walking inside the apartment we had been heading to.

To both of our surprise however Jake was home too and the moment he noticed how badly I was walking, he immediately got up from the kitchen table and walked over to me. I tried to hide the pained expression on my face but failed.

"Baby, what happened?" He asked, worry lacing his voice and a concerned look visible on his face. Immediately Jake put a supportive arm around my middle and gave a small kiss on my temple. Jessy didn't waste any minute answering the question Jake had asked while a smirk. was visible on her face.

"Your dick happened." She spoke in an amused tone before laughing a bit. "I think you've been a bit too rough Jake."

Immediately an annoyed look began to form on Jake's face and he rolled his eyes briefly.

"Shut up, Jessica." He spoke softly before focusing on her. Jessy softly unwrapped her arm from me before looking at him with a challenging look on her face.

"Just stating the facts Jake."

Then Jessy turned towards me and a smile began to form on her face again while she nodded toward the bathroom.

"Take a nice warm bath, you'll feel better." She spoke while sending a wink my way. She then turned around and before the two of us could register it, we were alone in our apartment again.

"Baby I'm so sorry." Jake then softly spoke to me, an apologetic tone lacing his voice. He immediately swiped me off my feet before carrying me towards the bathroom and turning on the water to let the bath fill up completely.

A small smile made its way onto my face and before I knew it Jake had undressed me completely and I was sitting in the warm bath while Jake was watching over me. Slowly I locked eyes with him while a thankful look was visible on my face.

"Thank you for being there for me Jake." I softly spoke while I felt the warm water ease the pain I had been experiencing the whole day. A small smile made its way onto Jake's face as well and he looked at me as if I was everything he could ever wish for.

"Anytime baby."

[krokonoko]

wanted to ask your 🔥 opinion for Gankutsuou but i realised i don't actually know what the "popular" opinion about this anime is xD so either that or ur unpopular opinion about the Pokémon franchise instead, if you prefer?

since I don't know what constitutes an unpopular opinion in the Gankutsuou fandom either, I'm gonna go for Pokemon:

the writing over at GF is p much always completely empty, platitude-ridden garbage imho. yes, that includes games like everyone's favorite B/W. maybe it's because I don't play a lot of JRPGs, but the amount of pointless waffling going on in a regular Pokemon game by now is completely insane to me. I used to replay every game half a dozen times. but if I have to sit at a table eating potato mochi with Professor Laventon one more time, I'm going to actually barf.

even with stories that I don't completely hate, like the ones centered around Lillie or Hop, they always end up falling flat. cause when it comes to the nitty gritty, GF always drops the ball. imho, Pokemon stories should be secondary to the gameplay. the more dominated the game is by the plot, the worse it's going to be.

[starry-eyed-wild-child]

need clay roach to fuck me so bad, lemme fuck the drugs outta him

WHAT... who said that?!

[thehyperrequiem]

Madeleine Cookie (Rango Parody) Cast

“A cookie (Yong Yea) who has lived as a sheltered family friend finds himself in the grip of an identity crisis. Madeleine Cookie wonders how to stand out when it is his nature to blend in. When he accidentally winds up in a frontier town called Dirt, he takes the first step on a transformational journey as the town's new sheriff. Though at first Madeleine Cookie only role-plays, a series of thrilling situations and outrageous encounters forces him to become a real hero.”

Madeleine Cookie (Cookie Run) as Rango

White Strabby (Bugsnax) as Mr. Timms

Espresso Cookie (Cookie Run) as Beans

Lilli Zanatto (Psychonauts) as Priscilla

Truman Zanatto (Psychonauts) as Himself/Priscilla’s Father

Elder Custard Cookie (Cookie Run) as Tortoise John

Gummigoo (TADC) as Bad Bill

Max and Chad (TADC) and Bowser (Mario) as Bad Bill’s Henchmen

Schwarzwalder (Cookie Run) as Rattlesnake Jake

Quint, Ballade, Enker and Punk (Megaman) as The Mariachi Owls

Ginseng Cookie (Cookie Run) as Roadkill

Thunder Mcqueen (Jjba) as Mr. Merrimack

Prophet Cookie (Cookie Run) as Spoons

Narancia (Jjba) as Waffles

Speedwagon (Jjba) as Ambrose

Moe (The Simpsons) as Buford

Wildberry Cookie (Cookie Run) as Eligin

Wambus Troubleham (Bugsnax) as Mr. Snuggles

Ford Cruller (Psychonauts) as Willie

Otto Mentallis (Psychonauts) as Dr. Rabbit

Johnny Joestar and Gyro Zeppeli (Jjba) as Themselves/Rango’s Posse’s Friends

Emporio (Jjba) as Cletus

Marble Bread Cookie (Cookie Run) as Mr. Black

Muhammad Avdol (Jjba) as Wounded Bird

Financier Cookie (Cookie Run) as Angelique

Moreau Oleander (Psychonauts) as Sergeant Turley

Fake Peppino (Pizza Tower) as Balthazar

Peppino Clones (Pizza Tower) as Balthazar's Family

Henry Stickmin (Henry Stickmin) as Gordy

Licorice Cookie and Poison Mushroom Cookie (Cookie Run) as Ezekiel and Jedidiah

Duo (Megaman) as Spirit of the West

Various Characters as The Citizens of Dirt

Wormsworth (Balan Wonderworld) as The Hawk

[zoeymalone]

Zoey invented a holiday on her half birthday March 9 called Lilly Leapers day 😝 she’s discussing the rules today: Rules of Lilly leaper day:

Participants must wear pink and green (frog or strawberry)

Ice cream waffles for breakfast

Theme is Kind of Valentine’s Day mixed with Christmas

Presents and flowers

We must visits Trampoline park

[usamamoweek]

Meet the Mods!

What username(s) and platform(s) can folx find you on? (Please include links!)

Hi, folx! I'm Lillie Bell. I can be found on AO3, and all my shenanigans happen on tumblr @lilliebellfanfics

(Fun Fact) What is your favorite kind of potato?

Waffle House hashbrowns -- smothered, covered, and capped

How long have you been creating works in fandom spaces? How long have you been active in the SM fandom?

I'm one of the OG crew from when the internet was young (lol). I wrote SM fanfiction as a teenager during the era of Alicia Blade, ASMR, etc., I had a short stint in as the writing mod in the SML LJ community, and have recently returned to writing fanfiction, mostly smut, after a long hiatus. I also write for Seven Deadly Sins when I'm not completely lost in SM.

What type(s) of creative works do you usually make? (fanfics, digital art, cosplay)

I cannot draw to save my life or take a good picture, so I am solidly a writer only. I am super impressed by folx who can work in multiple mediums. Words are hard enough, so that's what I stick too :D

What do you enjoy about creating for the SM fandom?

I love the joy & support the community has for each other as well as the diversity of ships and people in the fandom. For the characters, there are so many facets to play with and explore that I never feel like I'm done telling their stories. There are so many more situations to put these babies in!

Are you strictly UsaMamo or do you create for other pairings as well?

I write more UsaMamo than any other pairing, but ReiNako are my grumpy x sunshine queens and I love them. I've also delved into writing KunZoi recently and love their dynamic as well. I'm very much ship and let ship, so I enjoy reading pretty much any ship, but I can only write a pairing/poly that I feel I have a good grasp on. Hence, usually UsaMamo, ReiNako, and sometimes KunZoi.

What inspires you to create works for Usagi and Mamoru?

All the feels (lol). I have specific facets of their personalities or backgrounds that I love to explore. I love to mess with Mamoru the Orphan and how that shapes his decisions & personality (good and bad), and how he evolves with that background over time. I love happy-go-lucky Usagi who is just out in a world being herself, falling through life and living it to the fullest, but also has these big responsibilities and rises to every call.

Do you tend to work on multiple projects (WIPs) simultaneously or try to finish one at a time?

I have multiple WIPs right now, but I tend to be very focused on one at a time (for better or worse). I don't like leaving things not done, so multiple WIPs starts to grate on me to just get it done.

Do you prefer large projects (chaptered fics, webtoons/zines, highly detailed art) or small projects (one-shots or simple art)?

I like one shots / smaller fics where I can hint at how we got here or how the future might look after, but the focus is one small moment between the characters. That said, I currently have two long fics I'm working on... because reasons. XD

Are there any common themes, situations, tropes, or mediums in your work?

I write fairly broadly between dark, smut, and some fluff. There's usually a comedic edge, so it's not 24/7 serious (I'm not that person if you noticed ;D ). My favorite tropes are forbidden love/romance and the banter of grumpy x sunshine. There are definite themes but they may not always come through. For Mamoru, I like to put him in situations he isn't prepared for and help him make bad decisions. I really enjoy playing with his connection to Earth / Elysion and his strong sense of loyalty/duty to Usagi, as well as his shitennou. For Usagi, I think her friends treat her too delicately and, even though she's a bit silly or not totally organized, she will show up for her friends or the world when it's in trouble. I like to play in that space where she is unexpectedly mature b/c Usagi is a quintessential example of a person who doesn't have her shit together, she's not perfect & that's okay, and she can save the world just as she is. MF QUEEN.

I bring these elements into my other pairings--they are pretty common dynamics. KunZoi and ReiNako are facets of grumpy x sunshine and love vs duty/honor. So, I do like to push the characters into uncomfortable territory and then see how they respond. Rei always raises to the bait. Kunzite will crumble... eventually (if mechanical bulls are involved).

Is there anything you haven’t explored artistically and would like to try?

I've done a little bit of everything in my tenure in the fandom, but I think I'd like to produce a few more chaptered works, but not excessively long (6 chaps vs 20). I seem to be strong in either the one shot category or long fic category, but not in between. So that's something I'd very much like to work on for my own sanity.

[coochiequeens]

Last season, Small came in 44th place in the CX Male Senior 18-22 division, and largely floundered while competing as a cyclist in men’s competitions." And within less than a year as a woman he was allowed to compete against women .

By Shay Woulahan December 11, 2023

A trans-identified male cyclist has won the Women’s Singlespeed national title at the 2023 USA Cycling Cyclocross National Championships, outraging women’s rights advocates. Kylie Small, formerly known as Kyle Small, had been competing in men’s races earlier this year.

Though Small has begun participating in women’s events, he was competing in the male division at USA Cycling competitions under his birth name as recently as April. Last season, Small came in 44th place in the CX Male Senior 18-22 division, and largely floundered while competing as a cyclist in men’s competitions.

But on December 8, Small competed as a “woman” at the USA Cyclocross National Championships in Louisville, Kentucky, taking gold in the Women’s Single Speed division with a time of 38 minutes and 19 seconds.

The fastest female in the race was Jennifer Malik, who was awarded second place. The results of the race led the International Council on Women’s Sports (ICONS) to condemn USA Cycling for continuing to allow males to self-identify into the women’s category.

After the championship, Small was interviewed on his success in women’s cycling by Evie Edwards, a representative from ICONS.

Smalls made no mention of his sex, instead crediting his win to “pushing gaps” and “clean dismounts.” During the interview, Small stated that the idea to compete in the women’s single speed competition came from one of his coaches who persuaded him to join the competition.

This is not the first time a male has taken first place in a women’s cycling championship in recent months.

Just weeks ago, two trans-identified males dominated a women’s category at the Illinois State Cyclocross Championships, topping the podium in the Women’s Single Speed category and taking home medals set aside for female racers. Tessa Johnson and Evelyn Williamson placed first and second, respectively, in the competition, leaving space for only one biological woman – Kristin Chalmers – on the podium.

Johnson also seized the gold in both the Women’s Single Speed and Category 1/2 races at the Chicago CycloCross Cup in October, with the latter also coming with $150 in prize money.

In June, trans-identified male Austin Killips took first place in the women’s category of a North Carolina cycling tour known as The Belgian Waffle Ride, adding to his expansive list of victories against female cyclists. Killips also placed first in the 2022 Tour of the Gila, an internationally-recognized elite cycling competition. Notably, the 2022 Tour was the first in the competition’s history where the prize money for both the male and female categories was equal. But following Killips’ win, two biological males walked away with the prize pots.

But the issue of males dominating women’s cycling competitions is not isolated to the United States.

Emily Bridges and Lilly Chant, two trans-identified males, took the first and second place spots, respectively, at the ThunderCrit race at the Herne Hill Velodrome in London in June of 2022. Jo Smith was the only female to step onto the winner’s podium, and was seen standing at third place with her child in a photo that began to circulate on social media after the race had finished.

In March of this year, after British cycling announced their plans to ban males from female cycling competitions, Bridges responded in a statement posted on his social media, calling the move a “violent act” and claiming British Cycling was furthering trans “genocide.”

USA Cycling also recently announced an update to their policy regarding trans-identified male athletes competing in women’s competitions.

Announced in June, the update will come into effect on January 1 of 2024. In a statement, the sporting body said that “trans athletes” will be divided into two categories; category A and category B. Category A cyclists will be required to reduce their testosterone below 2.5 nmol/L for at least two years and provide medical evidence of this at least 3 months before a competition. Category B cyclists will only need to complete a gender self identification form to move from the male competitions to the female competitions. These standards only apply when competing domestically.

Commenting on the policy update, USA Cycling’s CEO said: “The revision of our Transgender Participation Policy was a complex process guided by several factors. Foremost was the direction of our Board of Directors, who asked us to prioritize the balance between fairness and inclusion.”

“Our work encompassed a study of the UCI’s most recent review of the latest scientific literature, an assessment of the U.S. legal environment and similar policies from other sports organizations, and outreach to our athletes, club and team managers, and event organizers. As U.S. law and scientific findings evolve, we will use this as an opportunity to do further review and revisions of this policy as needed.”