#like.. i ain't dumb i see the way people interact with each other and the way they interact with me

[mercymaker]

brother, why is it i wake up at 8 and within 20 minutes my mind slips into the "you know what? you never belonged anywhere and you never will :)" hellhole like.. pls

[woodle-isbae]

Nerd y/n and jock Connie enemy to lovers love story

Not all bad

Connie.S x Reader

warnings : more like rivals/frenemies than enemies , swearing , Reader and Connie have a past together , alot happens in one night , Reader is the typical nerd who tries to fit in. Reader was invited by Ony btw.

A/N: I'm going to make this a little story

you sat in the middle of a couch , sand witched between a passed out drunk rando and a couple on the brink of fucking each other. You took small sips from your red party cup , the loud boom of the music made its way into your ears.

your eyes scanned around the room , in search of a familiar face until it lander on a Buzzed head , legs being lifted up as he drank from a keg. people cheering him on and supporting the dumb party game. You watched this go on until he was let go , stumbling a bit before waddling your way .

his face was a flushed red , obviously drunk from the way he could barely hold himself up. He moved closer each time you blinked , until he stopped in front of you and stared you down , his eyebrows knit together for a moment until his face changed. he hunched over to the couple next to you and threw up, gasps and screams erupted from the two next to you , they shoved passed him and scurried out to leave.

''what the fuck springer!?'' You got up , refusing to be his next target.

he looked at you , a string of drool hung of his lower lip while he swayed side to side , clutching his stomach lightly.

''You got a staring pro-'' you were just about to cuss him out until you felt a hand slither round your waist.

you whipped your head around , being met with the pearly white smile of your Situationship , Onyankapon.

''Jus' forget it baby , he ain't important'' he took your hand , leading you away from the barely present person. You glanced back to see him walking over to his group for a second round.

. . .

you were making your way to the drinks , pushing past a couple of people until you found the bottles splayed out on a table, some empty and others barley finished. You mixed up some concoction for you and Ony , heading back to the pool area he dragged you off to , he wasn't there.

You checked in the backyard and went back inside , you turned the corner to head back into the kitchen until you bumped into someone , you made sure you didn't spill the drinks in your hands before looking up.

Being met with the face of Ony , absolutely mortified while he had another girl against him , she looked annoyed at you.

"Oh.." you muttered out , not even bothering to get angry.You knew he would do this but you guys just began talking.

"C'mon , don't get mad...we not even togeth-"

"Onyankopon...seriously??"

The girl shoved herself off him , scoffing and dissapearing in the crowd that was beginning to form

"See what you did..fuck , let's talk outside-"

"What I did...man fuck your shit."

You kissed your teeth , tossing the two cups on him before turning on your heels to leave , trying to get as far away from him before he could snake his way back into your heart. You could hear him calling you but ignoring to avoid any further interaction, your eyes filled to the brim with tears of anger , you needed to get back at him.

"Y/N."

Your head whipping over to the slurred call of your name , Just the person you wanted to see , absolutely drunk off his ass as he was left by his friends to cool off. Probably said something dumb.

"This don't mean anything-"

You blurted out before he could speak any further , spotting Ony in the corner of your eye and you needed to do something. You leaned forward , grabbing the man infront of you and smashing your lips together, eyes shut tightly and hands flailing around his body as his own slithered to your hips.

You could feel eyes staring at you both , a pair burning into your face until you finally pulled back , keeping your bodies close to eachother and hands in places you wouldn't even dare to put. Feigning innocence , you turned your head to the angered face on the other man's face.

"Fuck is your pro-"

"Don't tell me your mad.?? We not even together."

You mimicked his words ,down to the exact same tone.He was about to say something until he was cut off. The voice deeper and more serious.

"Jus' forget it baby..He ain't important."

Your eyes widened a bit , looking over to the suddenly sobered up man who had you in his grasp. He copied you and mimicked the words he could try to remember.

"Fuck both yall , and you are such a whore Y/N L/N."

He stormed off , seemingly leaving the event, while people whispered and went back to minding their business . You were swiftly shoved off , Connie going back to the drink in his cup.

"J'so you know , I only did that to help you...I wouldn't fuck you in a million years time."

You tsked and crossed your arms , looking him up and down with annoyance. You guys never really got along, never knew why but sometimes you would cuss eachother off until you nearly got into a fist fight.

"You jus' lucky this is Eren's party , I would've popped your shit by now."

"Can you go back to ready your little anime-book thingies , why are you even here.??"

"They're called comics , Constance. And I'm here to have fun and not drink my ass off."

He glared up at you , using his full name was only for people who knew him and due to unfortunate circumstances, You fit in that list.

"Fuck off.. I don't wanna see your face."

You huffed and turned to leave , Honestly this night was a mess. You could care less about what happens in your life , you just needed to rest for once.

You got back to your house , throwing yourself onto the bed and letting out a muffled sigh. Today was such an eventful day, excluding anything before 6pm.

You got changed into some sweats and threw on a tank top, making yourself a snack to eat while you scrolled on your phone. Laughing at memes and jokes sent from your Group chat , talking about the next cosplay convention and who your going dressed as.

The night was finally ca until you got a different notification, an unknown number sent you message and a image attachment.

It was a photo of Connie kissing you. The message stating that they had already sent It to half the school.

You only sighed , not really caring since you don't like half the school anyways.. that was until you thought of Connie. Then panic struck , he's probably gonna hate you for ruining his look.

What kinda jock dates a Nerd-scratch that, what kind of Jock dates Y/N L/N? You paced around your room , trying to think of any way to get him out of this until your phone dinged again.

Constance 🤓

-> we need to talk. Like rn.

You.

-> yeah, ik , I saw the photo.

Constance 🤓

-> ...okay , Monday after school, your place?

You only sent a quick thumbs up , he was obviously trying not to call you and cuss you out for ruining his life-that's what you thought- a pit of nervousness making itself home in your gut.

How am I gonna face him.??

[mysticbeaver]

Your opinion on all the side characters? Or what you like or dislike in each of them?

Thanks for the ask, and it's a long one! Nice for a change. Let's see...

- Jonny 2x4 - one of the characters I'm guilty of neglecting... But I think he's a fun, quirky kid (even when he's supposed to be annoying). I remember when I first watched Dear Ed (where he got in a fight with Plank) the scene at the playground made me sad for him. It seems to me there's not much Jonny fanart here on tumblr compared to how Plank and him are considered icons of the show elsewhere. That's probably what makes some like me less interested in the character... I hardly react to pics of real Plank IRL, sorry Plank fans 😅

- Sarah - she's fun... c'mon! Again, non-tumblr fans are on a different planet, the hate boners people have for a 6-7(?) year-old character are entertaining... for a while. I love that she's actually intimidating and strong, she ain't just bark and no bite, another less slapstick-focused show would have handled her differently. A lot of people cheer for the scene where Ed shouts at her in Little Ed Blue, cause they want to see her get "just desserts", but I never care about that, I like her for the rabid little princess she is lol. I also like people's headcanons of her treating her brother better as she grows up, and hopefully escaping the unhealthy favoritism from her parents.

- Jimmy -  even more than Sarah, the hate he sometimes gets is really tedious to me... he's always entertaining, especially his "theatre kid" moments, and his squeaky voice borders on "dog frequencies" sometimes haha. The only thing I've found slightly odd is maybe his flaws and negative traits (spoiled, Sarah always has his back, secretly a cunning little bastard) are sometimes given a free pass just because he's queer-coded, maybe? This only ever bothered me exclusively in relation to someone like Kevin being written off instead, but this my own bias, just a lighthearted observation (for real tho please tell me if this is a dumb reasoning)

- Nazz - she's the nicest and most well-adjusted "normal" kid around (if you ask me kevin ain't normal haha), but had an unfortunate starting point of "girl all the boys have a crush on", which she was never developed out of, or at least not nearly enough as she should have been. I've read something about the writers struggling to figure out what to do with her, maybe? Can't remember. Some people point out her hidden intelligence, but I think it would also be interesting to explore her negative traits, mainly I see her as slightly two-faced/flighty when it comes to how she interacts with the Eds.

Kevin - oh boy, my sense of this character is probably so skewed... The one character I used to get upset and annoyed about like an idiot, in regards to other people's takes and such, sometimes I resent the fact I ever got fixated on the character... why??? Help 🤣 I guess what torments me is that the viewer was never really meant to like him or find him interesting in any way? and doing otherwise is just a case of "fandom brainrot", I dunno what others think 😵‍💫 His jerk/bully role is definitely handled in more interesting ways than other shows would, there's enough meat to the character I guess it's possible to be invested in headcanons/developments. (or so I convince myself...)

Without getting too rambling, let's just say I love him as much as I'd find it entertaining to see him get incinerated by a flamethrower lmao.

Rolf - my other favorite ofc, and a much more pleasant one lol. Nothing embarrassing about loving this character, for sure. In fact I'm probably guilty of not seeing his flaws, but I guess he can be arrogant, and violent/gross with his traditions, when he could learn to be lenient considering how he's treated with a fair amount of tolerance by the cul-de-sac. But in the end he's just a kid trying to get used to a new land and culture.

Kanker sisters - I never thought much about Lee but my eyes have been opened by the implication that being the oldest one in a tough family/social background kinda excuses a lot of her behavior... But others can analyse this better than me.

I think Marie is the unfortunate middle sister who maybe had the least distinct personality? (beyond her aesthetic hinting at her being a punk chick), thankfully she's got plenty fans (btw her being underdeveloped is more food for thought for marie x nazz/nazzarie 👀...). I haven't got much to say unfortunately, other than my first eene ship was eddmarie exactly because of Marie development.

I'm guilty of seeing May as the most innocent one (certainly thanks to that bit where she cries in Hanky Panky Hullabaloo) and the only Kanker I'm keen on shipping with an Ed (the Ed).

Bro? - well... He serves his purpose haha. And he's got an interesting aesthetic. I do like people being invested in the character and even liking him or imagining a more redemptive interpretation of him. Fans have been able to like much more monstrous characters in fiction, being a Bro fan is no big deal... "I can fix him" sure go ahead! You're a saint 🤣

[scaramint]

I like your theory here! Thank you for tagging me, I love that my post inspired you. Just wanted to point some things out! (disclaimer: I'm just a physics undergrad so my analysis is in no way all-encompassing haha) You discarded g as an explanation for Chuuya's ability because g is a property of planets, but Chuuya's ability can be used on specific objects. However, g can be calculated for any gravitational field, not just celestial bodies! (the term IS generally used to refer to celestial bodies though) So, Chuuya could be manipulating the acceleration of an object with regards to a certain other gravitational field (doesn't have to be the Earth's) In the second equation, you ruled out r, the distance vector which I like because it doesn't explain Chuuya physics at all! However, there is one more wacky thing Chuuya could be changing, the universal gravitational constant, big G! (Changing it locally, of course) If changing the mass is on the table, then G certainly is as well!

But let's continue onto your hypothesis.

In classical physics, mass is absolutely constant! And it does seem to be an inherent property, doesn't it? However, many mechanics problems don't require the mass to be constant. See: The Rocket Equation. But, I do say, even if the mass changes, one thing must be observed: conservation laws.

(Side note: Mass is NOT constant in special relativity; an object gets heavier the closer it's traveling to the speed of light. This is why the 'rest mass' of a particle becomes important. Conservation still applies though) Firstly, conservation of mass (which will most definitely be a problem if Chuuya's changing masses willy-nilly!) applies, so changing the overall amount of mass in the universe. Even if we generalize with special relativity, we need to conserve energy, so it won't work out! So, Min, you say, he can't add mass because boring laws say mass in = mass out? Boo-hoo! Okay, then. We can ignore conservation laws for a minute. (Althought, I say we shouldn't because my professor would be breathing down my neck) Well, how exactly would our beloved mafioso perform this trick?

I can think of two ways. My brief foray into particle physics tells me of a sea of quantum fluctuations. This is a microscopic battlefield where particle and antiparticle-pairs pop into existence, annihilate each other, and disappear. (See, conservation is observed here as well) What if Chuuya grabs just the particles from this sea and uses them for their gravity voodoo? ...That would be a very bad day for everyone involved, considering the antiparticles are still around to annihilate anything else they come in contact with! Sorry Chuuya, we're not going that route. The other way would be by changing the very mass of the fundamental particles everything is made of. That can be a very bad idea. Considering that the masses of objects are what they are due to a funny thing called the Higgs Field, but overwhelmingly due to gluon interactions. These are incredibly strong forces which hold nuclei together. What happens if Chuuya messes with them? Poof! No more atoms for us. Since BSD definitely still has objects and people, so must have atoms. Anything that messes them up this bad is automatically off the table :( As for the imaginary mass. Hmmm, I had to do some research on this one, but they seem to be a parlor trick theoretical physicists use to explain unstable systems. The term also refers to tachyons, a theoretical particle that travels faster than the speed of light, which is also a particle physicist's thought experiment. Anything that can travel at the speed of light cannot have mass, so anything going faster must have imaginary mass. In my understanding, this would not interact gravitationally with regular matter. And if it ain't gravity, it ain't Chuuya! [I do agree that Chuuya manifesting actual gravitons is a dumb idea because gravitons are simply the theoretical force carrying particle for gravity]

This ends my concerns with Chuuya manipulating mass. I have some ideas regarding Chuuya and general relativity, but I've been to busy to research and actually do the calculations, so I'll stop here. Before I leave, I would like to add a note on this section.

This change in mass is also an apt explanation for how his ability manifests, because of the way he leaves craters in the ground out of weight. Yes, weight, which is what (F = mg) gives us. It fits, even if it's the wackiest thing imaginable in physics. It also explains how he can change the speed and acceleration of things, since Kinetic energy (½ mv²), gravitational potential energy (mgh) and most mechanics formulae depend on mass.

Speed and acceleration aren't dependent on the formula of kinetic energy and gravitational potential energy. They can be described from those relations. They arise from forces which arise from fields. Most mechanics formulae depend on mass because they describe a force, or more generally some kind of motion, on an object with a certain mass. The kinetic and potential energy is just a measure associated with the object's configuration.

Anyway, this got too long! I'm sorry if I seemed a bit pedantic in my response. Feel free to correct me, because I'm writing this with my brain fried from problem sets, so there's bound to be weird errors.

Here have my favourite Chuuya panel if you made it to the end!

Tainted Sorrow, but Physics.

Chuuya has some of the most interesting mechanics in the entire show, because his powers are based on an actual physical phenomenon. That he's warping. I mean sure, we knew it was overpowered, but a deep dive into it shows how stupidly overpowered he actually is.

(Credit to @veni-vedi-perivi for their post here and @scaramint for their physics here! I will be offering an alternative hypothesis which is a little more fictional than the latter.)

Formulae I'll be cross referring to:

1. F = mg where F is the force, m stands for mass and g stands for gravitational acceleration which is -9.8m/s² for anything close to the Earth's surface.

2. F = GMm/r² . Where M is the attracting object's weight, m is the secondary object, r is the distance between them, and G is the universal gravitational constant.

To further look into this, we'll have to take it step by step. There are a few factors he could be modifying for tainted sorrow to take effect.

First, the typically used explanation in theoretical physics, acceleration. If he's changing the value of "g", it makes sense. Every planet has its own value of gravity, right, and so he's probably just increasing the value of Earths'. Well, in that case, it would work on everything on Earth, and not just whatever is coated with that trademark red glow. Off the table!

According to the second formula, it may be possible that he's changing two other things then. Either the distance between himself (r) and whatever he's applying his powers on (m) or he's changing his own mass (M). And we've seen that the distance between himself and whatever Tainted Sorrow works on doesn't affect the power itself, so that's off the table. It's just a definitive range that his ability has, which I'll assume is a set radius independent of physics.

There's only two explanations left, and both of them refer to changing mass. Something that's inherently supposed to be constant, according to classical physics. So the rest of this post will be fictional physics, hopefully with some credit to it.

-> Changing the Mass

In classical physics, mass is an inherent property of the body that isn't subject to change whatsoever. In fact, most other mechanics are based on the mass being constant no matter what. What does change, is weight, which is technically a force. (F = mg).

But this is BSD, so let's say he's changing the mass. In this scenario I'll assume the value of "g" is constant for the sake of hypothesis. They're constantly on Earth anyway, so it makes sense. Whether his ability changes on the moon is a whole another post worth of hypothesis.

This means he's changing the inherent property of a body to have a constant mass. This will also explain how he manifests literal gravitons during corruption, because that does require creating virtual mass and/or imaginary mass (I'm not qualified to speak on those topics in depth, but in a section below I'll overview it.)

This change in mass is also an apt explanation for how his ability manifests, because of the way he leaves craters in the ground out of weight. Yes, weight, which is what (F = mg) gives us. It fits, even if it's the wackiest thing imaginable in physics. It also explains how he can change the speed and acceleration of things, since Kinetic energy (½ mv²), gravitational potential energy (mgh) and most mechanics formulae depend on mass.

And so it's the most plausible explanation.

But if he is actually changing the mass, then that opens a whole new box of crazy. But this changing of mass also explains corruption!

Speaking of,

Corruption.

Putting the Arahabaki shenanigans away for a minute, let's get into the nitty gritty of what exactly Corruption allows Chuuya to do.

Let's say he is actually manipulating mass, and let's say until thus far, this has not impacted his own mass. Well, what if Corruption lets him venture into the world of imaginary mass?

And we now enter quantum physics! Damn it. Didn't think I'd have to dip my toes into this too.

The concept of imaginary mass violates a lot of physics fundamentals. It is of course, only a hypothetical concept, but it makes a lot of modern physics.

If you've ever watched Jujutsu Kaisen, or heard of it, you'd know Gojo Satoru, and by extension about Purple. While that works on mathematical concepts, Chuuya's gravitons are not unlike that. He's essentially creating miniature spheres of imaginary mass that function as little black holes. The only other explanation I can think of is pure fiction.

That's wild.

And if this theory holds water, which it may or may not, that means Chuuya has a hold over all of the mechanics that let physics function on Earth. He has a hold over friction, weight, energy, and basically any sort of motion.

I wonder how wacky Verlaine is in comparison.

Please correct me if I've gone wrong somewhere, and feel free to add on with your own ideas! Once again I'd like to thank the people credited above for inspiring this in the first place. I hope this makes sense lmao-

[camellia-salazar]

So, I'm just gonna share something with everyone since I've gotten tired of holding this to myself.

I've created a world where characters from each fandom I'm in gets stranded in a world where they interact with each other and chaos ensues for the most part. It's basically an animated show I created in my head years ago and I've been invested in it ever since.

Each episode has its own plot (for the most part) and don't worry, the angst and drama still fallows with each character and fandom within the world.

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Here are some questions I think you'd ask and I'll answer now. Any more? Then ask them in the comments or reblog it. Idc.

Crossover? Yes. Just not official/canon.

How many fandoms? How many I get into. Rn it's a lot.

What's it called? I've been stuck thinking of a name for years until I found the perfect name, everyone has been using it but me since I've never heard of it until recently. Multifandom. (Formally called Fandom Friday). (but I'll still like the former name so I'ma call new episodes that or something idk I wanna keep it for something).

How many characters? Bruh I can't count that high. And even if I can, I don't got time to.

Character died? Not in this world they did.

How? That's where they go when they die, of course.

Even Warriors? Yes, Starclan is it's own island and the Dark Forest is next to it.

How does this work? Honestly, I have no idea.

What about the Waltens, the Weavers, The ink people in BATIM..? No more questions about afterlife.

What about Coco-? I said no more questions.

How did they get there? The characters I mean. They teleported.

Is Engineer from TF2 involved in that? No.

Is death still an option there? Nah. Characters can't die unless they go back to their world or have died in canon.

Are headcanons available? Like LGBTQ+ ones and such? Yup. Mostly my headcanons or the ones that everyone agrees with. Most likely the latter.

Food? Fruit trees and such. Gardening. Probably some meat too idk.

Water? L a k e s .

Where they gonna live? After a while of being stranded and sleeping on the ground, they build their own town and stuff.

That's dumb. WELL CAN YOU DO BETTER?!

What genre is this? Fluff? Angst? Horror? .. smut? All of the above, except that last one.. ish.

Wdym by that?? Listen, sometimes an adult show still gotta be just that, an adult show. You think characters like Murdoc, Tucker, and Trekky Monster gonna go on without making one sex comment?? It's just gonna be sweetened a bit. (I ain't gonna include sexual content tho, the commentary is the worst it's gonna get and even then it won't be that bad, trust me).

How the angst gonna work? Like magic.

Wdym? It's not gonna be crappy is it?? Depends on how you individuals take it. Everyone has different opinions. I just hope you don't end up having the same negative opinions.

What about creators, they gonna be in it too? Ye. After a while.

Fan artists like Tombstone and Stupendium? Same deal.

Are they gonna voice themselves or..? Not likely. They are heckin large on popularity, so idk if I could message them about it.

Is there gonna be guest characters like Brittle Bones Nicky and stuff? Sometimes, yeh... Maybe.

OCs?? ... I dunno. Most likely.. no.

Can we make the OCs guests? .. nah. Most guest episodes would be souly about the guest character. So not really.

What about your mutuals? What about them?

Are you gonna involved them? ... Idk we'll see.

Ships? 90% canon, baby.

What about the other 10%? Fanon.

Will there be crossover shipping? Yeah, mostly one way tho. Idk if they're gonna end up together or not.

Is this cringe? Depends on you. I think it's brilliant.

Any cw or tw I need to watch out for? Not really, unless you can't stand some gore and nsfw. But even then they aren't that major. If you uncomfy about that, then I'll definitely warn you all with it before hand. Like a disclaimer or something.

Are my favs gonna be in this? Probably.

What fandoms? Well, big fandoms like Marvel, Dr Who, and Harry Potter is not gonna be in this. Super Mario, Warriors, and My Little Pony are tho. Gotta be my interest. Yours too if you like stuff from this list.

YOU GONNA MAKE FUN OF US FANS?? Heck no. I don't even like it when the creators do that, not unless it's a joke that we all agree on. Then maybe.

Is this gonna be real? As real as I want it to be, or as real as it's gonna be. I don't got the energy, or the art styles to animate this. But even if I do, idk who gonna voice em, who gonna help me animate em, or how I'm gonna get the money to pay the people who would help me. But, I've listened to Felix Kranken say "I have hope, and that's all we need" or something like that idk. So I guess we'll see. Has to be a good idea and idk if people like it or not. So... Yeah, we'll see.

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Well that's all the time I got left. Again, any more questions and you can go ahead and ask them and I'll reply, or better yet answer it in another post and tag you. Reblog or comment, it doesn't matter. I'll answer.

(also this is what inspired one of my ask blog a bit and how the characters there got to where they are, but the reason why I involved it there too was because I didn't think I'd get to share this idea with anyone, so kinda regret it, kinda not).

(the ask blog wouldn't be canon to this idea).

(my other ask blog is also inspired by this world too. In fact, it is the same world (most likely yeah)).

Anyways enough rambling. Hope you like the idea, because I value it more than the other fan made ones I've ever had. Every fan art I ever have (and will be) of characters interacting with each other, is all because of this idea. So I hope you've read it, and if you did. Thank you so much. Bye y'all, I'd probably talk about this some more in the future. Cya. 👋😸

[420pogpills]

are you okay?? is it something personal or just the internet rn :(

it's the internet it's just been SO disappointing from sides i didn't expect that i'm like aaaaa.. i'm gonna explain it under 'keep reading' so that people can avoid it if they don't wanna see any negative things ❤️

i basically just left a whole other fandom/community that i was a part of on twitter. and i'm just sad because i always really enjoyed interacting with these people and a lot of them i considered my actual internet friends but the way some of them are acting literally ruined my opinion of them so much, but that's not the worst part

the worst part is how insanely contradictory the behaviour was. because this was a fucking community for vtubers 😂 and the vtubers themSELVES were contributing to the bits. you are all fucking faceless creators, and the people in the community are supporters of the faceless creators, but they were all posting 'face reveals' and the picture would be something dumb like a gorilla or a distorted looking person. so many people retweeting memes that were making fun of dream's appearance and it just literally destroyed ANY desire i had left to stay in that community 😂

not just because i was part of the mcyt community first and the dream team are much more near and dear to my heart than anyone else ever could be... but also because this essentially had nothing to do with dream, and everything to do with the realisation that these are the same people that preach self-love, that always give each other compliments, encourage each other - they then turn around to completely tear down a person, contribute to the already insane masses of cyber bullying, and laugh like it's funny. i literally deleted like 10 of my tweets about the face reveal because i was suddenly so uncomfortable with expressing myself in that community, i realised what's the point of me being there???

there's a lot of people i'm gonna miss and that's mainly why i'm so upset like it was just so fucking surreal to see such nice people acting in this way, and even the vtuber that i liked the most being a dick.. i'm just so so disappointed. does he not realise how similar of a position he is in? is that the kind of response he would like to receive if he face revealed? i'd like to see how attractive he is underneath that 2d model

sdioghbuidfussdfonuihf sorry omg this turned into such a rant but yeah FUCK TWITTER 😂 i know literally only have it to keep up with mcyt content, i ain't even gonna bother interacting with a single soul

[dclsbaby]

traitor - Dominic Calvert-Lewin 🦋

Summary: you reflect on your relationship, realised you've been wronged and should've trusted your gut

Warnings: mentions of alcohol

Word Count: 2.1k

masterlist

Brown guilty eyes and,

Little white lies,

I played dumb, but I always knew

That you talked to her, maybe did even worse

I kept quiet so I could keep you

It’s his green-hazel eyes that dissipate every logic, every sense of reason you had. It’s the way he would roll over to your side of the bed each morning to savour another 5 minutes before he has to leave, that made you feel yearned for and wanted. It’s the lingering kisses on your neck, on each shoulder and collarbone, that convinced you you’re the only one. It’s the grand dreams shared with you about your future together, filled with kids and their tiny jerseys, that made you believe his little white lies.

You had ignored the tingling sensation in the pit of your stomach that felt nothing like the butterflies you experienced on your first date with Dom. The feeling told you to succumb to your suspicions and unlock his phone, scroll through his messages and social media interactions. No, the feeling demanded you to swipe his phone, lock yourself in the bathroom, overstep boundaries, and find evidence of another woman. But that wasn’t who you are. You respected boundaries, and decided against it. You loved him enough to give him the benefit of the doubt.

The paranoia began to grow when you noticed the little things, such as the way he would put his phone screen-side down on the counter, or the way he brought it everywhere like it’s a part of him, even in the bathroom, or that he wouldn’t leave its sight when it's being charged. Then, these signs started getting stronger and more frequent. He’d get phone calls when you’re having dinner and every time you ask who it is, you’re always met with, “No one important enough to take me away from you,” and a kiss to suppress your suspicions.

Does he have anything to hide? You often ask yourself. Do I really want to know? Another voice asks.

You knew, deep down, that your gut was right. You knew what was happening behind your back.

It’s always the girl they tell you not to worry about.

You were first introduced to her one evening at a club event. Dom referred to her as the ‘girl with the magic hands’, to which you cringed at the innuendo. That was the first warning sign you ignored. Although shortly after exchanging names, you learned that she works at the training ground as a masseuse. Magic hands, makes sense, you thought. It did not make you feel better though.

You could see her appeal. You could imagine Dom and his teammates steal a glance, their eyes lingering much longer than they should. You could hear the locker room talk, words of adoration spilling from their mouths. Her charm is magnetising. She’s bubbly, she’s awfully kind. But did she really have to look like she could be on the cover of Playboy circa 2004 too? Though her beauty’s not your lack, it did not help with your brewing paranoia.

You can’t help but think she’s the reason he’s been staying back late at the training ground, why he comes home wearing a different shirt to the one he left with in the morning, and why he doesn’t talk about his day much anymore, as it probably mostly consisted of being lathered up in oil and getting sensual massages by a hot masseuse. The thought always made you sick to your stomach.

The overthinking had convinced you he had been seeing another woman right in front of you this whole time. But pretending that everything’s alright was so much easier than the inevitable confrontation, the accusation, the fight, the ending. So you kept quiet so you could keep him, and live in the false fairytale you try so hard to become reality.

Until you couldn't anymore.

—

And ain't it funny how you ran to her

The second that we called it quits?

And ain't it funny how you said you were friends?

Now it sure as hell don't look like it

You and Dom stayed friends after your relationship ran its course, for the first couple of weeks, at least. The days leading up to the break up were plagued with arguments over the little things like missing dinner plans and not keeping the room tidy, which led to bigger fights where you accused him of not being in love with you. Of course, he vehemently denied this, but you thought he didn’t fight for you enough. He didn’t push back, he didn’t give you a reason to stay, and that was enough for you to know that your relationship never stood a chance. You could handle disagreements and a few fights, but when you’ve been led to question your own worth—it’s done.

In the end, it was a mutual break up. It made sense, he needed to focus on his football and the constant fights weren’t helping his concentration. It was hard for him to leave each morning knowing you both went to bed angry, and although he would spend the drive home practicing his apologies, he would come home to find you fast asleep in bed before he could even make amends. As for you, well, you had to look for love elsewhere.

All seemed well until he turned more and more sour by the day. Sure, you didn’t expect to be glued to his hip at all times, or be the best of friends—you two broke up for a reason. But what you did not expect were the bitter remarks, the one-word replies, the sarcastic comments that portrayed the antithesis of who he was when he was with you.

Now you bring her around just to shut me down

Show her off like she's a new trophy

And I know if you were true

There's no damn way that you

Could fall in love with somebody that quickly

It all made sense when you began receiving texts from your friends attached with a photo of him with a young fan. You thought it was odd, why were you sent pictures of your ex with a fan, of all things? But there she was, in the background of the photo. Of course. Of course it was her.

More pictures started coming through of both of them in his black Range Rover driving around town, having coffee at your favourite coffee shop. You curse at him, now you have to find a new place to get your coffee. The pictures that stung the most were of the pair of them driving to the training centre together. Imagine the sight of a new couple in town pulling onto the Finch Farm carpark. You knew it wasn’t just a friendly carpool. She’s been staying on my side of the bed, you thought. Meanwhile, you’re still seeking the warmth from his side of the bed.

It dawned on you how much of a fool you’ve been. You feel angry for not trusting your gut, for letting yourself get played, for letting yourself take the beatings from people who had accused you for being with him for his money when it was you who was taken advantage of. If the love he had for you was true, it wouldn’t have taken him that quickly to find someone new.

—

You sat on your sofa for hours. Waiting to feel something other than numbness, the tingling sensation on the tip of your fingers from the shock is no longer there. The numbness eventually turned to chills, so you reach for a blanket in the woven basket next to the sofa. You wrap yourself into a cocoon, though all you wanted was to be a butterfly, spread your wings, and fly away. Pathetic. Even my metaphors remind me of him.

Feeling sorry for yourself, you sluggishly stood up and dragged your body to the kitchen and pulled out three different bottles of alcohol from the cupboard—ignoring what a senior had told you in uni to never mix alcohol unless you want to get absolutely wasted. You grab the glass from the top shelf, a cocktail shaker that came with the set your friend had got you for a secret santa gift, and make yourself a drink. One drink turned to two, to three. Then, you started watching recipe videos on YouTube on how to make a pornstar martini, which led to another two. 5 drinks in total. Lucky number 5.

After making a mess on the kitchen island, feeling delirious, you stumble across your flat, bumping a table on your way back to the living room, leaving a bruise on your hip that will hurt in the morning. The alcohol running through your veins giving you the urge to belt out a ballad and pour your heart out, so you somehow managed to open your music and play a song.

Don’t you think I loved you too much to be used and discarded?

Don’t you think I loved you too much to think I deserve nothing?

You belted every word, not caring if your neighbours could hear you drunkenly sing the words to a depressing ballad about not being enough for a boy.

Realising with what’s left of your consciousness that your balance is becoming unsteady, you stagger your way to your bedroom, extending your arms, careful to not run yourself into any walls.

Upon reaching your bedroom, you undress yourself into just a bra and underwear and dive face first into your made up bed, curl up under the warm covers, and blankly stare at the ceiling. The lights appear as though it’s duplicating with every blink—you could’ve sworn there were only two.

With each passing second, you begin having flashbacks of him. Images of the bedroom you once shared which looks nothing like the room you’re in now tattooed in your brain. Whispers of “I love you,” and “you’re the love of my life,” haunt you as you try to shut your ears with your hands, desperate to rid of his voice. You feel angrier and angrier by the minute, waves of sadness taking over your body. You wanted him to know how you felt. You wanted him to know how badly he’s hurt you, something your sober self would never admit.

So you do what your gut tells you, no sense of reason in the way to stop you from unlocking your phone, scrolling until you’ve reached ‘D’ on your contact list, and clicking the name you’re looking for.

*ring*

*ring*

Pick up.

*ring*

You asshole, pick up.

*ring*

*ring*

Fuck this, I—

“Hello,” a hoarse voice answers. You inhale a sharp breath.

His voice. The exact voice you hear every morning at 6:45am as he kisses you goodbye.

“You, you betrayed me,” you slurred as you made your way to your bedroom. He takes the phone off his ear to look at the Caller ID again, squinting at the bright light. “(Y/N)? Are you okay?” Dom jolted at your voice, the concern in his voice ever so clear, afraid that you might not be okay.

“And I know that you'll never feel sorry for the way I hurt,” your speech slows down with every syllable, ignoring his question. The sound of his breath tickles your ear, making you squirm a little. On the other line, there he was, awake from his sleep, listening silently to your drunken voice, his heart breaking all over again. “(Y/N), have you been drinking?” he asks, though he knows the answer.

“You talked to her when we were together,” finally throwing the accusation you never would’ve said to his face. He finally put together why you were not yourself towards the end of the relationship, you were convinced he was cheating on you. “I never—it has always been you, only you,” you ignore him. “I promise”, he whispers softly, trying to convince you with what’s left of his heart. He wants you to believe him so badly, but he doesn't know what else to say. Pain revisits him each time he tries to convince you that you’re the only one he’s ever been in love with.

“Loved you at your worst, but that didn't matter,” you laugh humourlessly, remembering all the times you wanted to be assured, to be convinced that you were the only one, but his actions suggest otherwise and your paranoia ate you alive. He didn't fight for you even when it was the last straw.

“You gave me your word,” alluding to each time he would tell you that no one else compares to you, each time he made promises about your future together. “It took you two weeks to go off and date her”, you accuse him. “I’m not with anyone,” he says under his breath, knowing you’re too drunk to remember what he says.

“(Y/N)?” Dom asks when he couldn’t hear anything from your end. “Please, can we talk, I—“ “God, I wish that you had thought this through,” you cut him off, your eyes getting heavier by the second, “before I went and fell in love with you”.

There it was. The sentence that ripped him to shreds. The idea that you might have regretted him, regretted being in love with him broke him to bits. He hadn’t realised the damage he’d done during your relationship, and what he did after your break up was unnecessary. He knew what it would look like, to be seen out with her. But he did it anyway to hurt you.

After consuming way too much alcohol, your body feels it’s full effect as your phone slips from your hand and you cave into your tired body.

He hears a loud thump on the other line.

“(Y/N)? Are you there? I—I still love you, can you hear me?”

Line’s dead.

Guess you didn't cheat, but you're still a traitor.

[mysticalwaterdroplet]

WARNING! Looooooooooooong venting ahead about why d/h sucks. So if you ship it and have somehow Goren lost in this tag, turn around, cuz if you continue you might get hurt. You have been warned. Also I guess language warning and mature themes...? Just to be safe. I'd also like to give y'all a little side note: I guess I am what people would call a Hawks stan. I personally really like his character and find him intriguing, however I am completely capable of admitting that Hawks has done sum fucked up shit. I still however "stan" Hawks, so I'm going to show why d/h is shit from a logical Hawks stans point of view. Anyways, without delving too deep into the whole Dabi vs Hawks stuff, since I'm not here for it, I'm here to talk about the shitshow that's dabihawks. So, first of all I'll give y'all a lil back story as to why I'm here. Long story short: I accidentally stumbled upon some d/h art and people who still defend the ship (with already debunked theories mind you), I felt kinda sick to my stomach, so I need to vent. Like they were referring to the fight where Hawks killed Twice and basically said: "DiD yOu SeE hOw HaWkS wAs OnLy LoOkInG dAbI iN tHe EyEs ThE wHoLe TiMe. 🤪 ThAt'S sO gAy!?!?!??!??" Bish, where was Hawks and Dabi supposed to look at? THE WALL??? They were fighting! Of course they have to keep an eye on each other. They were also talking about how "DaBi JuSt GoT jElLy CaUsE HaWkS wAs HaNgInG oUt WiTh TwIcE, aNd Is JuSt ClAiMiNg HaWkS!" And they were saying so much more nasty shit that I'd like to write here, but I don't think I physically can, and I also want to spare everyones brains, cuz I already took the L, like if any of y'all know how to get back my brain cells hit me up. I also noticed a common theme of people making Hawks the bottom to like a point where they thirsted over the idea of Dabi "destroying" Hawks' insides, if you know what I mean. Which seems to be the opposite for many of you guys here with finding stuff where Dabi is the bottom? I mean I know many of you guys probably don't like Hawks, but you gotta admit that it's fucked up to think that these shippers think it's hot that one of the people in their makeshift relationship gets seriously hurt in the act without consent. Whether it is Dabi or Hawks they put in that position is irrelevant, they literally like the ship because it's toxic and someone gets hurt. Like in what world would Hawks let Dabi willingly even get close to him or vice versa. We all know damn well that they despise each other. Horikoshi has literally shown that these two never trusted each other, never even tolerated each others shit, so why oh why did this become a thing?! Also, and I know that this can sound annoying to some people... But as a Hawks stan, I don't understand how people can say: "YeAh, I sTaN HaWkS UwU 👉👈, hIm AnD dAbI dEsErVe eAcH oThEr AnD aRe So GoOd ToGeThEr." "ThEy DeFo FuKiN'! Is CaNoN! 🤪" Like:

So... Are we just gonna forget that Dabi literally burnt Hawks' wings off? (Which was understandable looking at the context.) Or how Dabi sent some goons after his mother? Or the fact that Hawks literally idolised the very man that Dabi hates with a burning passion? The shippers: "Oh, BuT hIs WiNgS wIlL gRoW bA-" Bish! The fact that Hawks didn't die or that his wings are allegedly growing back doesn't mean the ship is relevant again. Hoooooo... it's like I can't catch a breather once in a while. How are people trynna stan someone and then say: "Yeah, let's pair our favourite person with the person that is trying to hurt them." HOW!? My initial reaction when Hawks and Dabi interact is: "Fuck. Someone's gonna get hurt." Like if I could have it my way Dabi wouldn't be anywhere near Hawks, they are a danger to eachother. There is no damn way I'd want to see the character I stan for hurt, so why do so many damn stans ship it! I just can't wrap my mind around the "appeal". I just don't see the sexual tension that these people talk about. Anyway I could probably write a whole ass book as to why I personally don't like this ship

but frankly I don't wanna waste your time since it's toxic.

I would like to however debunk a couple of already debunked theories that people use justify the relevance of d/h.

The "childhood friends" theory: Yup. People still cling to it. However Horikoshi literally trashed, stomped on and lit the theory on fire. We saw that Touya went to a regular school and was trained personally by Endeavor. While Hawks was in the commission. There is no way that they knew each other. The way Dabi got Hawks' real name was through his mother. Dabi ain't dumb, he's actually smart and calculating to a point it's almost a little scary.

The "Dabi freed Hawks and Hawks will turn into a villain": Boi.... Dabi didn't free Hawks off anything. Dabi tried to kill him and exposed Hawks and his wrongdoings to the world. That ain't love. Hawks isn't even Dabi's main focus, Hawks is literally just one insignificant part of Dabi's plan. Also, like Horikoshi has wonderfully brought into light, Hawks would never turn to villainy. He didn't even kill Best Jeanist. And he's still, after everything, saying "Endeavor is in trouble." Clearly insinuating that he's going to still help Endeavor. This man is the last person to just become a villain. And people have the audacity to say he'd become a villain because of Dabi. I have no words.

Besides even if for example the childhood friends theory was true (which it isn't, but let's humour the thought) or even IF they were foils, it wouldn't change shit. We'd still be in this situation where they despise each other. Childhood friends wouldn't automatically mean that they'd get along as adults.

-------------------------------------------

Anyways, if you made it this far, you're a damn trooper. Thanks for letting me vent.

And as a short note to end on: I hope I didn't come off as too aggressive. That's not my intention here. Also the text is way less polished and thought out than I'd like it to be, but I honestly don't have the time or energy to give y'all a publishable version of "Why d/h sucks": the Book. So instead you get this. A hastily put together vent cuz I saw sum shit alright.

TLDR: People with a brain can see that these two aren't in love. There has to be some major mental gymnastics in play to get any whiff of chemistry from these two.

[scientist-of-love]

If it's not too much, all of LS for the ask game!

LET'S GO LET'S GO LET'S GO!! >:D hope you're ready for how long this gonna be lol

Risotto

Favourite thing! - He's sooo gender love that funky goth man. I really like the way he carries himself and how he treats his team, and his personality is just really cool! Metallica is really cute too <3 I can't really describe anything specific that I like about him, he's just so good

Least favourite thing - He totally got screwed over by the narrative and probably would've beaten Diavolo to a pulp if it wasn't for plot armour. (Although I think it's a good character moment for Dia 'cause it shows that he's willing to cheat and do all sorts of underhanded things to win. But this ain't about him.) Also him losing his whole team like that is so SAD, he deserved so much better!

Fanon pet peeve - I think fanon gets him pretty right! I guess I'd like to see more chill and lighthearted content with him that isn't shippy, I guess? Even then, I don't really mind. I haven't consumed a massive amount of fanon content because the fandom terrifies me.

Sorbet and Gelato my beloveds

Favourite thing - KINGS ❤️ I can't really say much because they have no time in canon but I like the thought of them just interacting with the rest of the team and each other. Plus Gelato's jacket is cool! Be gay do crime <3

Least favourite thing - No content 💔 And their deaths are really disturbing which I know is the entire point but it makes reading/watching Vento Aureo hard. Also, it may've just been the translation I read, but the 'were they a couple?' and 'close friends' stuff in the manga just doesn't sit right with me.

Fanon pet peeve - Can't say much because everyone's interpretations are so different. I sometimes think people make Sorbet a bit too serious when they're both described as crazy, but that's more of a personal gripe. I'm kinda sensitive to heavy and graphic gore/torture/violence/ect ect so seeing people take them really far and making them do super gruesome things can be uncomfy for me.

Formaggio

Favourite thing! - He's silly! I like his whole demeanour. It's pretty interesting to see how he tries to get Narancia to let down his guard by joking around and acting stupid. He has cool big brother energy! How chill he is about his job while doing horrible gruesome things is quite interesting too, makes me wonder how he got involved.

Least favourite thing - Shoves his cat in a bottle. What the fuck.

Fanon pet peeve - Again, not much. People dumb him down or tend to only focus on his relationship with Illuso, I would like to see more content of him interacting with the rest of team!

Illuso

Favourite thing! - He's so smug and the whole Man in the Mirror arc is one of my favourites!! I would like to punch him (affectionately ❤️.) He has a pretty neat personality and his dynamic with the others is fun! I really like Man in the Mirror too, it's such a cool stand. I don't have any specific to say on him, I just think he's neat.

Least favourite thing - King your clothes look like a mattress

Fanon pet peeve - Would be nice to see some more content of him interacting with people other than Formaggio, and I'd like to see his stand utilised more.

Prosciutto

Favourite thing! - He's a super interesting character! I love his design and his dynamic with Pesci is really good! He's grown on me quite a lot since I've watched it.

Least favourite thing - I wish he was less of a jerk to Pesci sometimes, but that's just a personal thing I guess.

Fanon pet peeve - I find that people make him pretty one note or make him too prim and proper or ultra violent when he's a very balanced character. Pr*s x P*sci shippers are gross,,,

Pesci

Favourite thing! - I LOVE PESCI SO MUCH!!! His entire personality, the way he's deeply disturbed by all the gruesome things his team does, how he's quite sensitive and is trying to be tough to make his bro proud, his self doubt and how he needs a bit of encouragement, his stand, everything about him. I am a Pesci fan first and a JoJo fan second. I'm super duper attached to him and would like to give him a biiiiig hug!!!

Least favourite thing - He makes me so sad, especially when he's on the floor crying and shouting about Prosciutto being thrown out of the train. It's such a good character moment but it makes me so DISTRAUGHT, he doesn't deserve this! And his last moments right before he gets killed don't do him justice imo, but I understand why it happened. I just would've liked to see him have more of a strong exit after all he went through.

Fanon pet peeve - I feel like people make him too soft and babyish and genuinely scared of Prosciutto which just doesn't sit right with me. Or they disregard him entirely because I guess he's just not as appealing as the other members? Dunno.

Melone

Favourite thing! - I just think he's neat! And also pretty gender. I like his design and the way he's very scientific and gets excited about finding out new things or getting the results he wants. I really like the idea of a computer stand too, and how non-confrontational he is. The way his juniors have to be raised and taught like a child is interesting to me, and they have heaps of potential!

Least favourite thing - The whole way juniors are created feels... weird. I'm still not entirely sure how it works but I have a feeling I'm missing something obvious and it's probably very very icky. And I hate hate hateeee how in the anime they made him lecherous and it just makes him feel really predatory. I love his anime design but I prefer him in the manga, especially how he seems much more upset over Prosciutto and Pesci's deaths than the anime.

Fanon pet peeve - I guess it's not entirely inaccurate bc of the anime, but I dislike how a lot of the fandom sexualises him and some people make him not respect the other members' boundaries and makes him very lustful and overbearing, especially when they make it his only personality trait. It makes me super uncomfortable and I tend not to go looking for Melone content because of it.

Ghiaccio

Favourite thing! - He's a very fun and interesting character! I like White Album a lot and I find his rants really amusing! He's so cool!! He has lots of potential and I just like his personality! He's probably one of my favourite members of Squadra :D

Least favourite thing - I would've liked to see his relationship and dynamic with the rest of team expanded upon, as well as more about his background expanded upon. OH AND HIS DEATH IS SO SAD!! I haven't seen the dub so I don't know what it's like in that, but his jp va did such an amazing job and it made his death so soul crushing. (Also it was followed by That Scene and ended with Freek'n You in the credits so that really didn't help)

Fanon pet peeve - People make anger his only personality trait sometimes, or they woobify him for shipping which just feels kinda off.

As you can probably see, I have so many thoughts on La Squadra

[retphienix]

It's been 6 years :)

On March 30th, 2015 I decided I wanted a gaming side blog. (so we're early, but shush, it's the month for me)

I didn't know what I'd use it for exactly, but I had ideas- something I always have even if most of them only get as far as daydreamin' or writing out before closing them :P

For proof on the lack of direction the blog initially had- the March 30th date is the anniversary of my first post, an in-depth and lengthy review of Dragon Warrior Monsters for the GBC.

If you know the blog then you know "Extremely long and in-depth reviews" aren't the norm around here. As a matter of fact, that first post is the ONLY one I've done!

The closest I've come to ever repeating that would be the (word of the day) Directionless video I put out on Hades to get a grip on the concept of making videos, but that wasn't nearly as much of a 'review' as that first post is.

Tangent, definitely planning on trying my hand at videos some more for the foreseeable future. Probably not gonna use the tagline Full Impressions that I tossed as a whim for the Hades video but yeah- I'm excited to try my hand at a few videos :) tangent over.

It didn't take me long to come up with what I'd like to do for the blog though :)

A few months later I liveblogged a challenge run of FFT where I used only Ramza- a solo run. - Which maybe only happened because I tried a nuzlocke run a year prior on my main account-

(Nuzlocke | FFT challenge run)

Thanks to that haphazard liveblog experiment I started to realize a couple things which became the primary motivators behind this blog.

1) I LOVE sharing experiences. No brainer, I'm sure, but being able to share my experiences, and compare them with others' experiences, and just that mutual sharing is uplifting and feels good to do.

2) Liveblogging is an EXCEPTIONAL motivator to buckle down and play all those games I said I'd play (cue everyone laughing because I'm still way behind and have an immeasurable backlog).

But I mean that, on both respects. I have plenty of motivators toward the blog today, but if I were to be concise it's pretty much "It's easier to beat games if I liveblog them- otherwise I get distracted and play other games" and "I love sharing experiences and thoughts with people about my favorite thing- games."

Since 2015 I've tackled around 70 games as full playthroughs, and an untold ton as one offs or just to ramble about for a bit.

I've had a lot of highlights over the years, and I don't talk much about it as an overall experience so I thought for the anniversary I'd try to do just that. Not everything- I can't say I have photographic memory that would bring all of it up without prompting after all :P But whatever comes to mind as I browse some of my old stuff- as well as some thoughts on what I'd like to see in the future.

It's gonna be a bit self-centric I assume as I type this preamble to it, so let me say outright that this blog wouldn't be half of what it is without all the people who've given it the time of day over the years.

From recommending games they love or appreciate, to comparing thoughts, to offering kind words for analysis I've done over the years, to pointing out when I'm dumb and misread a situation :P- to, yes, even the people who decided "Fuck this guy's ramble" and deleted my captions before reblogging my gifs way back during Hamtaro (Of COURSE I remember that! It's amusing lol).

This is better because of others, because of the interactions and the people I've gotten the chance to chat with or befriend. It's just a liveblog more or less, my own little bit of fun I toss out for myself if for anyone- so seeing others enjoy this or that from the work I put into sharing my experiences or thoughts is always a joy in itself :)

Anyway, onto selfishly rambling about some tidbits of the past :)

Also sorry but no, opted to not shove a ton of photos in, it does have a handful of links to old posts though :P

This'll be disorganized as heck as I'll add to it over time before I feel it's worth posting (or the tumblr post editor becomes a hassle and more or less forces me to).

First~

FFT Solo Ramza Challenge: Considering it was roughly the first thing this blog has done, it's also something that's stuck in my head a lot more clearly than most of the other stuff I've done to be honest lol.

In truth, this is partially because FFT is my favorite game, bar none. But it's also because the whole experience was pretty new to me. Prior to it I had really only done one self-imposed-challenge that wasn't requested by the game in some manner and that was a nuzlocke run of Blue version.

So adding a challenge to my favorite game was a fantastic experience!

Notes I just wanted to say today about that run: If anyone enjoys FFT I honestly recommend giving it a shot for the unique story it lends itself to. I do recommend skipping the rules until after the second battle but that's up to YOU to decide.

My first post on the subject is me complaining about spending 4 hours grinding out the second fight and, despite hyperbole being my natural state, that was NOT hyperbole.

It DID take 60~ restarts to beat. It DID take 4 hours. The reason is that that 2nd battle is RNG as HECK, you HAVE to have Delita do some meaningful actions, you HAVE to have the enemies miss and make poor plays, you damn near HAVE to crit a few instances to save yourself from taking too much damage.

It's a numbers game to the extreme, so I wouldn't fault anyone for 'cheating' and skipping the 2nd fight for the ruleset lol.

The memory that stands out the most for that run is actually isolated in a post in which Ramza (Purrick in this run) talks like a total badass as just ONE DUDE running into a room full of enemies. I just think on that as a great encapsulated view of what it was like. The run started off face grindingly difficult, but because FFT is a game that offers so much freedom to the player it was extremely easy to 'break' the game into making Purrick overpowered as hell.

That's something I love about some tactical RPGs, I love having the ability to play smart so that I can play stupid later on, and breaking the game into making him one shot god is certainly a good payoff for playing smart early on :P

RetQuick: I miss RetQuick, it was primarily a short experiment I did in 2015 where I'd play a game for a short span of time (REALLY short, like 10-20 minutes) and record that for the purpose of making gifs and saying a short piece on what I thought.

It's one of those formats where the purpose was pretty shallow- but had a reason. I wanted to try making some gifs with some tools that existed online, so I made an excuse to do just that.

I also wanted to play a TON of games, usually through emulation on my sister's PSP, and this let me do that.

These two minor goals came together and so I spent a while making RetQuicks which were honestly more fun to make than they had any right to be. I mean the gifs were tedious but the playing? The thought sharing? The end product ocassionally having more appeal than just a photoset? It was fun.

I'm thinking whenever I have trouble picking a game for the blog I'll revisit the format... sorta.

I already reused it for a short stint to show clips I had no plan on expanding into a playthrough, but that died as well as it was too similar to Tidbits posts (another tag I no longer really use).

My thought is to rebrand retquick as something of a tryout for what game comes next. Play a handful of my backlog games for an hour or so each and say some thoughts before saying which one I'll continue as the main game for that period of time.

Old Tag Stuff: One of those things that only sticks to me since I made the decisions but it's always funny for me to look back on my old posts because I was apprehensive as hell toward making my posts visible. The reason my early playthroughs on the My-Tags page are variants of Ret instead of just "The name of the game so people can find this post" is because I felt like a liveblog would just spam the tag to hell-

Something I don't remotely feel bad for doing anymore.

So I avoided getting any sort of spotlight for quite a while on the blog for little reason.

Why Retphienix?: This is just a dumb thought I wanted to share and I'm sure I've said before.

It stands for retro!

Yeah!

Ain't that dumb and also not a real shorthand? lol

I think I have some sort of deer in headlights anxiety towards naming things, I mean do you think I think Full Impressions is a good summation for a video? I don't. But perhaps that's overshadowed by the other inexperiences and anxiety driven decisions that had- doesn't matter.

Retphienix is Retphienix because I sat there in 2015 and thought "Well... what do I name an alt account?"

My main is Redphienix, which yes, is ALSO a terrible name AND is misspelled. But it's that because of sentimental reasons. As a kid I misspelled Redphoenix when making my gamertag (I knew how to spell Phoenix back then as well, I was too excited about xbox live and misspelled it) and it's become something of a sentimental misspelling.

So I wanted to make a mix on that for my game blog, but I had no idea what. In the end I thought "RetroPhienix? I don't know. Retphienix is closer to Redphienix. I'll do that" and so it was done.

And just like how Redphienix is both bad and misspelled but exists because of sentimental reasons- Retphienix has acquired the same 'flavor' in my eye lol.

Aspirations for the blog: I have no immediate ramp up plans or road map or whatever, and in truth I'll be happy if the blog stays just as it is forever- up until tumblr ends- I cry over lost posts- and I reopen it on another platform.

But I do have blurry half-considered daydreams that I'd like to see happen for the blog through some hard work or shifts on my part.

One is something I'm already doing kinda, hence my embarrassing means of bringing it up a lot lately. Videos- I want those. I wanna make some looks back on series people don't talk about that I enjoy, I want to make videos sharing my thoughts on games I beat for the blog (like what full impressions kinda was, but I don't think they'll have a unified name from here on out). Maybe retrospectives, but mostly when I think of making a video tied to retphienix or me in general it's me looking at a game that said something to me, and saying it louder with my own interpretations on it.

You know the kind, videos where they talk about a video game but not the whole thing- just a singular message they really heard loud and clear from it intentionally or not. I dig those and I know I end a lot of games having plenty to say that could be directed into such a format.

We'll see.

And I'm along for the ride on that one as well- currently I'm keeping my eyes on whatever is directly next, which happens to be "I plan on playing Omori, if it clicks as something to talk about I would like to take a shot at that in a video too!"

The other is that I'd like to build a small community. Wouldn't know the first thing on doing that in a modern sense, but just a little online friend group to chat with and play games together. Something that could open up multiplayer and coop experiences being better shared on the blog and would just in general expand my gaming to what it used to be back on the 360 when I had a large group to play with.

Since the 360 era ended I've pretty much closed off- stopped playing competitive games due to lack of interest- and slowed down to playing all games either solo, with randoms (and no mic usually), or with my cousin. It's a rare instance when I play with some good people like @gamesception or another friend of mine, John.

When I diverted from playing competitive games nonstop toward other genres I didn't intend to also cut out all my online gaming buds, it just kinda happened, and I never really put any effort into rectifying that.

So more or less I'd like to one day sit down and work on a discord server, and then buck up and put the leg work in to make some gamin' buds again, but that's such a vague concept anymore.

Sounds all sad and what not but it's more ambivalent, I made decisions that

changed how gaming worked for me after the 360 and this is just where it landed for better and worse- I'd just like to see if I can make it a little better :P

General things I think when I think retphienix: Honestly? I think of how much fun I've had over the years and how thankful I am to have had an outlet that encouraged me to explore more of the medium.

I REALLY love games. I went to college for games, I've written LEAGUES about games, I've played countless games, my childhood was games, my adult life is games- games games games yada yada yada.

So when I think of retphienix I think of how without it I probably wouldn't have explored a lot of the corners of gaming that I have.

I genuinely, and I mean this, might not have sat down and beaten FF7 for myself and would have considered the amount I played as a kid to be enough.

I might not have played Chrono Trigger yet, and I KNOW I wouldn't have played Chrono Cross, and I'm happy as hell to have played both of those. CT was a mind blowing moment for me that showed me just how good an RPG can be, and CC gave me miles to think of in terms of innovating an RPG and how beholden to the narrative a sequel should be (I don't feel CC should have been chrono at all lol).

I DEFINITELY wouldn't have given New Vegas another chance. And I know I'm a sourpuss on NV, I've been that way since I maxed my achievements on the 360 for it, but replaying it really did reveal to me how exceedingly negative I was being.

My memories had become "It's brown and a boring location >:(" and "The factions all suck and it doesn't do anything with the idea of bad factions >:(" and became "It's... a little brown guys, not a big fan of the area" and "They didn't do enough with exploring the gray factions" while adding "Wait. This is pretty damn fun. And 90% of the additions are stellar. And I forgot about Dead Money, my favorite dlc in any game ever with a story that tears at my heart every time I think of it, NV good actually?"

Faxanadu would have remained a cool game I saw on SSFF and not a game I played to the end and fell in love with the aesthetic feel it has!

Also that's a game I cheated like crazy on lol, I would do it again! Save state scumming games meant to be rudely difficult is only fair :P

I probably would have never sat down to play through Windwaker which was such a positive and uplifting experience that I now get the most relaxed and warm feeling in my heart when I see those blue waves.

There's so many experiences I would have left on the table in favor of like... putting more hours into a live service title or something.

Maybe, and no offense to my cousin or anyone else playing it, but maybe I'd be no-lifing World of Warcraft nonstop just stagnating my interest toward the skinner box mechanics of an MMO?

Some offense, actually but lightheartedly lol.

But beyond the entire games I've played for the blog, when I think retphienix I picture all the time making gifs, all those games I played on the PSP for short stints, buying a retron 5 to add to what I could explore and being stoked when they shipped a freebie box of old controllers to go with it, getting angry at the retron for being a Piece Of Shit lol, crying at the end of damn near every game with an emotional story because I'm a big emotional mess of a person who finds investing and crying at a story way too easy thanks to empathy pulls, oh!-

Getting excited whenever I found that I had a "*controversial*" opinion that no one would care about lol. Like the one that comes to mind is that I thoroughly believe that Dragon Ball Z II: Gekishin Freeza!! for the NES is WAY better than the fandom recognized and appreciated sequel/remake Dragon Ball Z: Legend of the Super Saiyan!

How many people do you hear talking about either game, let alone saying the NES game that is roughly half of the SNES remake is the better one :P But I stand by that! The SNES one is a remake of DBZ1 and 2 for the NES but it loses all the charm and some of the fun of the NES ones by being a lackluster SNES game!

lol

I admitted wholeheartedly that this post would be a lit-

little directionless (gotta love the new tumblr poster making me break sentences like that), but to sum things up.

It's been 6 years. It's been an untold amount of work to be honest- liveblogging a game, at least for me, hasn't been the easiest thing. It's a lot of thinking out my thoughts (heh), it's a lot of learning tools to make the capturing process possible, it's a lot of experimenting, it's a lot of writing and editing, and, well, sometimes it's just tough.

I mean I went to school for coding, not video editing, not writing, not image processing, not this or that- but this hobby has introduced a lot of things even if only at a VERY base level (I admit fully to using online alternatives to make gifs for instance).

I learned a lot about, well, a lot of things in order to use this blog to learn more about games- and all that work has become part of why I've loved all 6 years of this blog.

6 years of gaming, work, and you all- and it's been worth the investment :) Here's to many more and all of you whether you stumble upon this post or not- literally anyone who's interacted in these 6 years, thank you, and anyone who hasn't I offer you well wishes as well.

<3

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

This had to be explained to me this morning...

Okay why I don't fucking know and they won't bother because it's fucking dumb and lazy I'm quite sure.

But.

Apparently I won't be home for Christmas, Annabelle and I will be stuck out at the Uncle, Clone, Socrates Christmas Horror with probably my cousin Chris.. Maybe my brother...

And so I said "what are people supposed to think? They're supposed to be happy and experiencing new things, this is old shit and for me?! That's gonna make them feel even worse knowing I can't be with my Kidd over some stupid invalid shit that I don't even understand except it's just plain laziness, idiotic and definitely developed by a male!! A male that's lazy about his family!!"

William: let me defend myself

Me: shut up

So I was told by someone, someone i stole a gun from shortly before my faux 16th birthday in an attempt to help save the planet (Not William but an undercover CIA agent), that in his heart he was told that this Christmas when people look around think 'Sabrina is missing out on this kind of happiness with her family' that they should remember and realize that the sadness they feel for me was felt for millions of human trafficked victims world wide, every Christmas and every holiday.

Some of us didn't know about it. Or had forgotten. So let this be the last Christmas any one is sad. It will always be a serious issue in our hearts and minds and souls. But not forever should we carry the burden of sadness and fear.

This year is the eradication of the solitude of the sadness of each Holiday being sad. Now we all know why gramma would sit in the chair alone hugging herself quietly at,the end of the day or sit the camcorder in the corner and refuse to participate like a granddaughter thought she should and try to get her to interact more because she didn't seem happy enough.

This Christmas: the sadness shall be replaced with cheer. The fear with triumph and joy.

And yes you will remember I'll not be happy and my kids without their parents.

But they have my real mom and dad. My real twin brother. Their not real Uncle that loves them as much as a dad. And many more people, nearly 100 in their neat home giving them best wishes and having Christmas dinner.

No way in Hell nor God's green Earth would i allow them to miss Christmas.

So today they will open presents from Uncle Garth and tomorrow Trisha's stockings, the next day from the Dildo King who has been making new things with his family (faux Uncle Garth and real Uncle Matt) that i asked Uncle to purchase 3 years ago in preparation of taking care of my children. And on down. And hopefully I'll be able to get there while Christmas is still happening.

I'm there in spirit as i always have been and that is my Christmas Lesson to know I cared about Children i didn't know i had. And for Declan and Annabelle, too. To know they also assumed one day they would feel Christmas joy as they once had when they were little and alone, listening to little voices explain how things were different where they lived yet no matter how close they felt they knew things were too far to really feel the Christmas joy as they should. This year they will know why.

As Declan explains. Its beautiful because they never expressed unhappiness or even jealousy or loneliness, just an eagerness to understand what they were missing out on because their belief was one day they would experience it out of slavery and here with us.

And it's true. Since my divorce... The ability to do Christmas All big and strong has dwindled... Because i have too much pain, mostly physical and can't gather the strength to make it perfect in every way. And as getting older goes Declan couldn't also hide his worries from his soulmate. Although we worked together to make it best for Annabelle. For us it was more about "Thank God it's Done and everything went perfect"

So this year... Apparently William's laziness wants us to feel that before Christmas. -.- or at Christmas. -.- like i really care. We still have so much work to do! We have mental health and we have bunkers to redo so they're not bunkers and factories to move and figure out what to do with. And employ people at a rate that doesn't cause insane inflation. Like work is never over. So Idk whst the fuck hes thinking. Im All about letting those miserable souls we can't get the missle at think they can enjoy Christmas. Pay a lot of someone's an insane amount of money to miss Christmas and sit outside their house and shadow shot them when they attempt to leave. Drop down the fucking chimney at night... Now that it's raining because the world cries for us...maybe that's not the best idea but still you get the picture. See, my husband is lazy and has no defenses. But i still love him anyways although his life woild be easier if he just listened and didn't pretend he didn't ever hear whole discussions we had where he was all "oh that's so smart!!" And make new plans when he sure as Hell knew i wasn't listening and my face looked like this:

And he tells me i should take a picture of myself because hes too afraid to tell me i look mad and wants to soften things up.

Uh Yeah when you abandon me in Hell when i fully expressed that i wanted him to come back full body in our old truck and drive me to Macy's in Oklahoma So we can get the kids Christmas presents in the form of bedding and some holiday clothing like nice dresses and suits. That they can wear while playing in mud puddles because that's what life is about as stains are like scars but stains remember less pain usually, and more laughter than tears and fears. Then he could leave me at Uncle Garths while he goes back to work. So we could spend the whole drive together and shopping time and then Declan could caravan with us.

But no. Hes all about abandonment because its easy. -.-

And now he's like way way beyond scared. Well that's what a mad face is about. Its the door to truth. And truth isn't always happy or pretty.

Its scary. And it's real. And it doesn't go away. Its Not just a point of view, it is total truth. Its at least 2 points of view and a validation.

When i told him what i wanted he promised he could do it and wss very happy.

So then later he's rambling about me stsying here while im busy making gingerbread houses and I'm quite sure he inhaled too much Stevia powder we used for snow.

William: hey now I don't wanna be in control anymore i want my wife to tell me what to do!

Uncle Donald: are you trying to hide behind Uncle Donald?

William: I'm heading that way!

Uncle Donald: well you get back to body life for yourself and we will make sure you get there safe. If not we will Chinook her express. How does that sound?

William: well uhhh how does that sound to you? Im asking Uncle Donald.

Uncle Donald: well you have a period of 2 hours to decide then we are taking her and the kids and Uncle Dan, as she calls him, with respect because hes always been kind to her.

Me: sounds good to me

William: what about those other guys that have been fighting for her?

Me: Christmas comes the same time every fucking year. Like you they ain't spent it with me so they obviously don't care.

William: well uh they care, now.

Me: because they have an opportunity to and they're all taking too long. What? We put the calender on pause because they didn't make their own opportunities? No they hurry the fuck up. Maybe they will make it but not fair to my children to wait on them to finish and any husband od kine will understand that.

William: not if they always lived in a bunker

Me: well that is why we already placed human trafficking victims with their families as best and as fast as we can So that they can learn to understand. Because it's not something that can be taught, its something that's felt only when together in happiness and love in a group. Its like having a whole meal and not just a bag of chips.

William: that's all you gotta say.

Uncle Donald: Sabrina...

Me: we already have a standing plan from August. It will be easy.

Uncle Donald: that's all

Me: thank you. And Merry Christmas.

[whimsically-ominously-auspice]

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A post shared by ABC World News Tonight (@abcworldnewstonight) on Apr 6, 2020 at 12:14pm PDT

The curve flattened I'm told due to evaporation.

Evaporation is allowed to occur when 3 or more people in one house have COVID-19 and give consent to immediate travel to their home place -- some aliens prefer not to call it a planet but it is

So when they are diagnosed they are sent home in NY state including NYC. And so it's made s remarkable difference in numbers.

The evaporation numbers are electronically recorded live in a databank

So dead bodies to dinosaurs and handle that nasty drama or evaporation and hands free and clean.

And as a doctor or nurse, "you are diagnosed with COVID-19. You will have an adventurous future. Please go home and enjoy your ride. Here's two prescriptions to help you on your life's journey"

I mean really. Try a little flavor.

"Bitch you gonna die yo! Here take this pill so you shut the fuck up while you dien' ain't no one wanna hear you yo! And push this down and suck when you be coughin like you dyin cause you will!!" I mean i Don't even care. What are they gonna do? Complain? When? They about to die. In case they do "I explained the medication use and how to and when to and I said the future is different than it is now. And i need a break. Care to join me away from this soon to be home individual?" now its only for now and i really don't recommend you to talk to someone like that except people like me, just wanna punch some fucking ass holes in the face.

Besides some people find that kind of interaction comical and they actually do prefer it to normal doctor talk. Its humbling. Some get upset like Denise.

And i just walked by Uncle Dad and he said to her when she borrowed $2000 from me and lied it was for bills but it was so she could go to Hawaii and she said "just between you and me i borrow this Don't tell dad" and she was talking about it because I walked by and he said "yeah Denise just between you and me You got a bloody broken nose"

Because he wanted me and my daughter to go. And she borrowed almost all my savings and i didn't have enough for 3 plane tickets to Hawaii when she already had $2,000 and 2 paychecks go in and had over $6000 of her own money on the trip after bills paid. So she had $8000...

And i couldn't go. She she got a busted nose. She was until 6 months ago assisted leader of Zulululu on Eaerth.

She insisted that Nathaniel try to initiate sex with me at that time and lost her rulership.

Because in reality she told him to rape me. That's what she fucking did.

Anyway point. If someone talks in a different manner to a COVID than usual. But isn't abusive as i was not abusive in the passage above i expect it to be excused and accepted and discontinued soon. As it is ONLY for COVID-19 activated and not carriers (which will only show up in DNA4U)

A lot of people The most strong people have been invaded by aliens. The strongest.

And we been beat down. Over and over.

I'm gonna pull out the NHRA because some of them kids are real special to me.

32% are human. 92% of the remaining percentage are alien. That's just the drivers.

72% of mechanics are human. 4% of the remaining are alien. (Cause they're fucking lazy -- not just an opinion)

The rest evil humans.

So of 600 drivers... Take 32 times 6 and you got some fucking number i ain't a calculstor but it's about 3x6 is 18 plus in the ones column 2x6 plus Yoir carry.

192 I'm assuming out of 600.

So that totally isn't right. 32% of drivers. 1/3 of 600 is 200

Fuck tree msn noe he says there's 900 drivers. Makes me laugh

So over 300... Why does the calculator say 288??

Why does this not work? 32% oh is not 33.333% it's less than im all thinking 30% is 1/3.

Fuxk math.

I'm sloppy in math. I have good humor about it tho and tree gets a good chuckle at me because I get so dumb about it. I was looking for 35% which is about 315.

See why Yall need 8 hours or more of restful sleep? Denise kept me up all night acting stupid screaming and then Nathaniel woke me up early worried about his livelihood. So i got me like 4 or 5 hours.

So 288 people surrounded by 900 people.

This is often the case then the remaining (i have a calculator here) 612 people try to drag down the 288 i can clearly see that they are outnumbered by over double

So that is a two on one unfair fight. Two not even being allowed to be on the fucking planet!!

And the one alone to stand or ball up to defend is nearly defenseless.

Then in the NHRA to make matters worse the aliens lie and manipulate to get their mechanics behind them.

So i developed a system that the driver team that wants to fight fights as a team and they have to pay real cash money starting at $10,000 that just goes up and up. If they intend to fight a human and Easter Egg occurs and the aliens that put up the bounty to warrior can't fight and must award all cash to the human ran team. Like Erica Enders.

And if she catches you talking shit after the cash award (usually a wire payment) and she will. She racks up fees and fines aka charges. Then she can beat the shit outta the alien team that has to stand there with their hands at their sides or in their pockets after the pockets are cleared by the awarded team and each person gets 5 hits to the face or ribs then the shit talker gets 10 from each team member from the human side.

Since 2013.

Aliens do not belong on Earth. Many of the drivers are the worst offenders of human trafficking which is why They are allowed in the NHRA so we can spy on them and is why rhe mechanics are so many humans.

Because by default humans hate aliens. Its just a distaste we are programmed and then we feel sorry for them for our programmed hate..

It is a very vicious cycle and very painful. Because we can't stand the way they act or dress or the way they're so fucking happy. And its because they lie and hide who they are from us and we feel it.

Thus the distaste

No matter how hard we try to like them and enjoy being with them the hiding and lying over and over of their true identity is terrible.

Queen hid from me her identity and I was all who the fuck are you? Like it wasn't like i would be rammed if i asked.

She said "pardon?"

And i was like oh shit and i got all red... And i was all oh im sorry I should not talk to her like that she's elder and proper! So i said "im sorry ma'am i was Just wondering who you were"

"Well I'm the fucking Queen!!"

I must had looked like a turnip by then all the blood rushing to my face to feed my brain.

"Of who?! What? Where?!"

"Of England" and she folded her hands in her lap on one side and looked all dignified.

Holy fucking shit who would thought?! Not me!

But an alien will lie "I'm just like you but ...." And never dignify themselves to say they are alien. And it is irritating.

When Queens or Kings don't announce themselves its full of mystery and wonder.

When an alien DOES then it's full of mystery and wonder.

When they don't it's absolutely full blown annoying.

Sometimes we can act like children and allow a person to follow us around and copy every move like the other kid doesn't know how to live. But there comes a point even a child will explode in temper.

They just don't fit on our planet!

Even Venus. Neptune and Mars when they transferred to human Because they earned the right by following the rules we still had to tweak their brains and look and so on.

Neptune looked like Ewoks. They were so fucking cute!!! I love Ewoks. I slept with one forever in my bed when i was a kid - a stuffed one from the store.. A fake non living one. I didn't know. I just felt a lot of love.

And i was being really abused by Denise and Nathaniel and i felt really better to,wake up to its cute little face. It was the one thing Denise didn't try to destroy because she knew the truth about them but she sure didn't tell me.

So although I have and the whole human race has a severe dislike and distaste for the alien race I did ensure that their deaths are one I would want for myself. For my children. For the proper Queen of England who can joke around and make my body feed my brain to keep me alive for one more day.

Something kind.

Evaporation is a slight accordion feeling mainly in the chest and then off they go.

So no one intended for Donald Trump to be running his mouth telling people not to listen to me

Simple bronchitis treatment then home to their families to discuss the ability to leave and when and where. And apparently there's a website you can organize yourselves on so you don't go alone.

I have tried every other way and it was unsuccessful.

I'm not destroying my own planet that was a gift because some aliens are fucking rude.

Im just gonna send their asses home as i should have done long ago.

Its not about being bitter or wanting revenge.

Simple fact is they don't belong here and they have their own home and their own Gods.

Its straining for their Gods to switch between their home and here.

Not my creation. Not my responsibility.

Not the nurses nor doctor nor military.

Not the mailmans nor Amazon's.

When yall voted for an American Revolutionary War 76% voted yes. Of the world wide population of nurses and doctors and health cate professionals 81.5% voted yes. Over 81% voted for a Revolution

So i expect no problems from now and the next 13 days.

24% of Y'all were probably aliens. Tree says... 16 and a half % which then leaves probably evil humans. Snd tree says yes.

So 100% of Humans says yes fuck this shit.

So y'all drink your grocery store wine. Have your cheese. Leave me some extra sharp cheddar but get you some too and get your ice cream. Buckle down and take your tests for money to buy all that. Don't pay no rent nor mortgage

We will talk to car loans i expect. Talk to your car loan providers. I don't want no dude towing your car cause he know it's at home and you didn't pay the monthly payment.

So use your DNA4U to pay your car loans and car insurance and get your food..

Don't be paying baggers online. I got a couple I follow here on Tumblr always a medical or food need. Go on the street corner and work for that yo.

They can get same as you to take a test

Get your student loans deferred.

If you have no DNA4U access and you did and you got an email saying why then you're leaving the planet So click the link and make your arrangements to get on your way.