#like. I'm sure that's just because I was a kid but I hardly remember ever thinking 'I want a better quality of this'

[tarraxahum]

Image quality is such a weird thing

Like, nowadays you find old YouTube videos from the 00s and you're shocked at how pixel-y they are. Because 240p was the average resolution. And it's so bad compared to todays 1080p or the 4K ones.

Or take the old LiveJournal icons. The small ones. People made gifs inside them, some so small you can't even see the face of the person. Right now it's like. Why so tiny? You can't even tell who that is? But back then it was probably a cool ass icon.

Somehow back then I never once complained about the video quality. Or smaller image files everywhere. It was what it was and it was enough?

But in comparison to the better quality today... It's so glaring.

Weird.

[h2llish]

⁀➷ ˖ tough love

notes ─── we love rollo <3 so this is my contribution to @cloudcountry 's event!

ROLLO FLAMME ─── if you don't care, you're not sure anyone will.

warnings ☆ fluff, some comfort, can be read platonic or romantic, gender neutral, reader is not yuu, playful teasing, lowercase intended, takes place after the event btw

the sky had become dashed with yellows and pinks as the sun began to set, and many of your peers began to retire from the rush of class. you would've liked to join them, but like clockwork, your routine left you climbing the belltower as the time on your watch struck six, with your books abandoned at the bottom for you to come back to. (if anyone stumbled across your belongings, they knew to leave it be, far too used to the routine of you and their president.)

you believe you had come to recognize every miniscule difference in the planks with how often you'd climb them, navigating the corners like your body had memorized every turn. and perhaps it has, since you've been climbing the belltower for more than a year every day to meet him at the top.

"there they are!"

you smiled and tilted your head respectfully as you reached the top of the tower, greeting the gargoyles that lived with the bell. they'd come to recognize your face, knowing you by name, and always waiting for you to reach the top at the same time, every day. ─ you'd only ever been late once, when you hadn't been aware of the quicker passage to the top. but since then, you'd always be there, even when you fell ill with a cold, or found it difficult to walk after a bad bout of food poisoning (specific, perhaps, but it did happen, and yet you still came at the exact time in which you promised you would. even if that did lead you to receiving a long scolding).

one of the gargoyles, who had always been more talkative, and seemed much older compared to the rest, waited to gesture over to the bell, where you could just barely see someone sitting on the other side. "we're especially quiet today."

"is that so." you sighed, gripping the bag on your shoulder with a lazy shrug, nodding at the gargoyle in your thanks.

rollo hardly batted an eye when you took up spot beside him, setting the bag down safely, and leaning back on your hands with an exaggerated sigh. "you know, having to climb all these stairs every day, gets exhausting." you said ─ a jab, you always made sure to poke at him. it was a test, something you've done since you were kids. you'd learned that his reactions to your jokes always told you how he was feeling, how open he was to talk to you.

"then stop climbing every day." he replied, rolling his eyes but not giving you the satisfaction of a glance your way.

you gasped, as dramatic as he'd known you to be, "but this is my time where i have you all to myself! i'm offended you'd say such a thing!"

"you're ridiculous."

"says the guy who is brooding all alone here in a tower." you snickered, and he finally looked at you, sending you a glare. but you hardly felt any anger behind it; at least not at you. ─ the anger you were used to seeing since the incident was always directed elsewhere, stewing, grieving.

"i'm not brooding." he scowled, and you raised your eyebrows, as if challenging that claim.

"sure you're not." you clicked your tongue and grinned.

he was talkative today, expressive ─ a rare occurrence with him. you'd consider it your lucky day if you didn't know he's only ever like this when his guard is down because he's simply too tired to keep it up. he's known you since you were small, you'd been there since the start of it all, and yet he still found it so difficult to relax. ─ you knew why, and you grieved for him when he could not.

he went silent, a scoff his final jab at your teasing, turning his head back out to the city that the bell overlooked, watching over it like a knight to its queen. the same city you can still vividly remember being covered in flickering flowers that drained you of the magic you built up if only to be at his side when he got into the college. ─ you remember being in the dorms, attending to any students who might need your help. and you remember when they started to fall unconscious. you remember looking outside as the flowers spread, until you too, went dark, only to wake sometime later with the mission of finding rollo to make sure he was okay. (he was, and you think you know why.)

"are you hungry?" you asked, crossing your legs and leaning forward.

"no."

"liar." you quickly rebutted, turning your head to him with narrowed eyes, "you didn't eat lunch."

"and how do you know that?"

"i know everything, my dear rollo." ─ you always made sure he was taking care of himself, always there to support even when he remained oblivious to it. you remember making that promise to yourself as a kid, to look out for him when no one else would, when he didn't know how to grieve, and he scowled and cursed at every mage that crossed your sight.

you grabbed the bag at your side and reached into it, pulling out sandwiches and bottles of water, "i brought you something to eat." you held it out to him with a look that told him he had to take it. he did, and he didn't need to say thank you because you knew that when tomorrow comes, he'll have your favorite pastry waiting for you, like he always did when you make sure to care of him where he lacked. "i would've cooked for you, but alas, i simply had no time."

"thank the stars." he sassed, and you would've gasped in surprise if you hadn't been expecting. ─ he really was so talkative today, lucky you.

"we are still sitting at the top of the tower."

"your threats have no effect on me." he scoffed, before taking a bite of the unwrapped sandwich.

you snorted and glared at him with faux annoyance, "see if i ever come back here."

a side glance as he chewed, before he jabbed back, "what happened to having me all to yourself?"

"i can manage."

"you're much too terrible at lying."

he's right, but you think that applies only when it came to your care for him.

and you know it will be the same tomorrow. ─ just as your watch strikes six, when the sky is painted with yellows and pinks as the sun begins to set, and many of your peers begin to retire from the rush of class. and although you would like to join them, you'd still find yourself at the belltower, like clockwork, with your books waiting for you to return to them, and a bag on your shoulder with sandwiches inside because you'd know he'd probably forget to eat lunch. and you'd find something else to jab at him about, to see how he's feeling, and know what he needs you to be.

because you made a promise to care for him, because you're not sure anyone else will.

do not repost, translate, copy, or run my writing through an ai

[kairiscorner]

question of the day: who would fall the hardest if they ever fell in love?

well... i've got 4 candidates in mind, and i think... (2/4)

(reblogs are greatly appreciated, it helps get my content out there! if you guys like what you see, please reblog it too <:D)

miles morales. — guilty of falling hard for you.

summary: he didn't think it'd happen so soon... well, love always takes place in the most unexpected places and times, no? pairing: miles 1610 x gn!reader genre: fluff !!

miles morales believed he was never one to fall easily, to fall first, or to fall... hard; but you helped him realize that he, in fact, was all of those things. the moment he met you was the moment he realized what he wanted, who he wanted, in life. you were the one who made sense of his life, the one who opened his eyes to the person he wants to be with, and you were the first person to ever want to be more than a stranger that captivated his whole heart and soul this way--you were special, and always will be to him.

miles morales is literally the sweetest boy you've ever met; he acts like he could be anyone's friend, anyone's brother, anyone's cousin–he gets along with nearly everybody, and that's the nicest part about him to you. he's always so friendly with everyone, especially towards you–a stranger he just met today.

miles morales started off as a stranger, started off as this cute, yet lost, looking boy to you that you stumbled upon at a busiest part of the campus. you were both new kids, and you were both incredibly lost, and weren't looking where either of you were going.

miles morales bumped into you by accident–it was practically a collision, actually. you two crashed into each other and were seeing stars, with him apologizing that he bumped into you in the first place. "sorry, i wasn't... wasn't looking, ow..." he groaned out as his once blurry vision cleared and he caught glimpses of your face.

miles morales he didn't know what to say at first, or how to even say anything to such a... a perfect person. he didn't feel worthy of being spoken to, being apologized to the same way he did to you.

miles morales was caught in his own world, drowning and getting lost in the vast expanse of your beautifully colored irises, the length of your eyelashes, the shape of your nose, the way your eyebrows crinkled in pain at the impact--the way your voice captures his attention with how sonorous and captivating it is; and the way the hairs on his arms and the back of his neck rise up at the feeling of your gentle, supple flesh of your hands against his is.

miles morales pulls away from your touch, he accidentally picked up your books instead of his; his mind is a mess right now since, wow, it's been a long, long while since he's felt this way. he actually doesn't even remember if... he's felt this way for anybody before you, and it's crazy because... he's never known you existed until now. "sorry! sorry, um, i'm... wow, am i such a klutz. here, lemme help you, for real this time." he said with a chuckle as he handed you his books and picked his own books off the ground.

miles morales thought helping you out, flashing you a smile, and apologizing to you would be the end of it, because who would spend extra time chatting with a stranger who bumped into you? well, apparently, you would. as he began to walk away, you instinctively reached out and held him by the arm--that sent sparks flying from his chest and a heat creeping up his face as he turned to look at you.

miles morales couldn't believe you'd really stop him in his tracks to properly thank him. he's had his fair share of strangers that never end up in his life again after that one chance encounter he's had with them. he's gone through many people in his life, doing things for them and them doing things for him, and he always thanks them, but hardly ever gets thanks--especially like this. he doesn't know how to feel about it, he isn't sure on how to feel about it; it's so new to him... and he's craving for more of you, to know you even more from the inside out.

miles morales is a stuttering, flustered mess. a smile is drawn on that innocent, loving face of his that isn't sure of how to react; surprised, taken aback, or... grateful? grateful that you were kind and patient enough to consider the person behind the kind act and thank him. "i-it's nothing, really! i'm always happy to help such a pretty-- um..." 'crap, i slipped.'

miles morales is wincing at him slipping up and admitting that, yes, he found you very adorable, attractive, though you were both strangers--and... he wants to get to know you even more, badly. he craves to be your friend, but he didn't think you'd want to--you were both strangers to begin with, but... maybe this is his chance to show you just how much sweeter he can be the more you get to know him, he's already taken a liking (understatement, really) to you.

tags !! @k4tsu3 @onginlove @luvstarrstruck @toneystank-3000 @ii01vq @maxoloqy @popeheywardssecretgf @lovefrominaya @solecitoszn @meowmoraless

[half-oz-eddie]

Something's wrong with Billy.

Clearly wrong.

He's been holding something back for days, maybe even weeks. Who knows how long?

Steve can tell, though. Billy's cranky and standoffish by default, but he's been more distant than usual.

Billy had a big appetite for sex. With Steve's long hours, he could hardly keep up. They normally had sex every single night, but lately, all Billy wanted to do was cuddle in bed and fall asleep on Steve's chest. Which was fine, but they hadn't had any sex in nearly a month.

That was when Steve knew something was wrong. He wasn't sure how to bring it up. He did all he could to keep comforting Billy, loving him, caring for him each and everyday, but...still...Billy just wasn't himself, and it wasn’t getting any better.

"Baby." Steve softly muttered, caressing Billy's back. "Baby?"

"Hm?"

"We haven't uh...fooled around in awhile. Too tired lately?"

"You can have me anytime, Steve." Billy reached into Steve's shorts, and Steve moved his hand.

"What'd you do that for? I thought you wanted to—"

"I do—but I'm more interested in you and how you're doing."

"I'm fine. Just tired." Billy rested his head on Steve's chest.

"That all? It's just...you've changed. You used to have so much fun, and we had wild sex every night—"

"So is that it?” Billy questioned. “I'm boring you? Gonna find somebody else?"

"What?” Steve emphatically shook his head. “N-no! I could never replace you. I just...you're different, and it makes me worry. Makes me wonder if I'm doing something wrong."

Billy laughed. "Don't be stupid. You're fuckin' perfect."

"So what's wrong, then?"

"It's just...it's like you said. We were having so much fun when we first got together. We'd sneak around, we'd party, get drunk, and everyday was like a fucking movie with you."

"Yeah. We had a lot of fun over the past year." Steve chuckled. "So what's the matter? Is this not fun anymore?"

"No. It's not all fun like before. I'm used to getting a thrill all the time but...when things started to calm down, you weren't just looking for fun. You were loving me, taking care of me, letting me go to school while you work. You told me you believe in me."

"And I meant that! What’s the problem?"

"That is the problem! I've never had that before. I don't—I don't know what else to offer you."

"Offer me?"

"...I don't know how to be anything but a good time. I don't know how to be anything but the life of the party. I don't know how to give you...what you give me."

Steve sighed, his hand wandering into Billy's curls. "Do you remember 2 months ago when I got food poisoning from that shitty food at the diner?"

"Yeah, you were puking your guts out for 2 days."

"And you took care of me. Made me some soup your mom used to make, a-and you even cut some tortillas into little chips with a pizza cutter. It was the cutest thing I've ever seen in my life."

"So?"

"So? That's what I want, Billy. You're there when I need you. For more than sex, more than a party. I can count on you to always be there, without fail. I never have a single doubt about your love for me."

"Because I love you a lot. I love the shit outta you."

"And I love the shit outta you too. So don't worry about this anymore, alright? We're good. Whether there's a party, or we're just lying in bed."

Billy let out the biggest sigh, loosening his shoulders and releasing all of his burdens. "Still feel like…fooling around?" He asked, playfully mocking Steve’s words.

"You kidding? My dick's standing at attention as we speak. You're so hot when you talk to me about your feelings."

Billy laughed as he rolled on top of Steve. "You're so fucking stupid, y'know that? How'd I get so lucky?"

[solaris-amethyst]

💫Midnight Talks💫

✨Pairing: bf!Hendery x gn!reader ✨Prompt: Can I request a bf!Hendery drabble where YN have a nightmare and calls him just to make sure he's OK? ✨Requested by a lovely anon🫶🏻 ✨Genre: fluff, partners au ✨Word Count: 0.9k ☀️Authors Note: Thank you so much for requesting!🫶🏻🥰

You woke up with a jolt, cold sweat covering your body as you sat up looking around frantically for the one person who had been hurt in your dream.

There was only one problem.

He was not at home right now, you were all alone and in your newly awakened state of worry due to your nightmare it was translated to that he most certainly was hurt.

Before you could stop them the tears were falling from your eyes, down your cheeks gathering up at the tip of your chin before slowly falling down onto your hands which were holding the blanket tightly.

You felt awful as the first sob was let out. Carefully searching for the little button on your nightstand to turn on the lights.

Momentarily blinded when the lights finally light up you squinted your eyes before finding your phone.

Quickly opening it and finding your boyfriend's contact was easy but pressing the call button at first was hard. Hesitating at first because what if you would disturb him in the middle of the night?

He was away on a conference with his job for a few days and must be tired was something that crossed your mind until you remembered what had happened in your dream.

You pressed the call button and made sure to put it on speaker so you could just hold the phone in your hand.

It felt like it was ringing forever.

Every time you heard the signal instead of Hendery picking up it made you more and more worried.

"Hello? Y/n?" Henderys groggy voice could suddenly be heard from the speaker and you let out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding in.

"Babe? You there? Are you okay?" He questioned sounding a bit clearer as if he had shaken away the grogginess of just waking up from the phone ringing.

"Hendery..."

"Are you okay? Are you sad? You sound sad babe, has something happened??" He sounds worried now and you sigh before telling him:

"I had a nightmare... and you got hurt in the dream. I'm sorry I woke you up I just had to make sure you were okay." You ramble on and before you continue your little rant the request for a FaceTime call popped up on your phone.

You clicked on accept quicker than you could think and seeing your boyfriends face, hair tousled and eyes slightly bleary.

"Hi." You say and he smiles brightly when he sees you.

"Hello gorgeous."

"I'm hardly gorgeous right now, I feel like shit." You confess to him and he gasps.

"Do not say that! Now what is this about a bad dream about me? Want to talk about it?" He asks gently and you give him a little nod.

"I can't remember it all but you got really hurt in it and then you disappeared from me and I couldn't find you. It scared me just seeing blood on the floor but not finding you nor hearing you respond to me when I called." You confess to him and he nods as he listens before sitting up a bit more.

"Well I can assure you I am totally fine." He shows you himself with the camera proving he is well and unhurt which makes you relax a little bit.

"And I'd never leave you, like ever. I'd rather cling to you like a koala all the time if I could and every time you call I will always answer you. No matter what."

"You promise?"

"I promise."

You sniffle and dries away the remaining tear stains from your cheeks as Hendery gives you another smile, his eyes twinkling prettily in the light from his desk lamp.

That's when you notice the figure in the other bed sleeping soundly.

"Is that Dejun? Won't he wake up with us talking so loudly?" You whisper and Hendery snorts almost laughing before shaking his head.

"Nah he sleeps like a rock. I'm not kidding when I say he could sleep through anything during the night." Your partner reassures you but you still feel a bit bad at potentially waking him up.

"Are you sure? Both of you have lots to do tomorrow..." You trail off as Hendery gets up from his bed and walks over to Dejun.

"See? He won't wake up." He flips the camera so you can see as he gently pokes Dejuns face or lightly messes with him as he giggles loudly.

You know you shouldn't laugh but you cannot help it when Hendery starts making Dejun do certain faces like turning his mouth up so it looks like he's smiling and much more.

"Hendery stop that!" You snort and you can hear the smirk in his voice when he says: "But I'm cheering you up! Also listen! He snores but have the audacity to claim that he don't snore when I tell him that he does! Now you can help me prove I'm right." He tells you before growing quiet so you can hear your friend actually snoring.

"He denies it? Of course he does... Dejun would never admit he snores." You chuckle "But now please leave him alone..." You yawn and Hendery flip the camera back to him.

"You should lay back to sleep, I'll stay on the call with you until you've fallen back to sleep and don't you dare tell me I shouldn't! I want to do that okay? I'll guard over you and will stay until you feel safe enough to fall asleep again." He says looking serious before getting back into bed and turning his light off at the same time as you do.

"Promise you'll stay on the call until I've fallen asleep?" You question as you lay down again, phone next to you.

"I promise gorgeous."

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

Note: request by @willowbrookesblog! also at some point I'll have a fic for every uniform, I swear.

Warnings: fluff! mention of period, cramps, blood, ptsd. also suggestive.

pairing: Modern!Sihtric x you (f)

Summary: You hadn't seen Sihtric in a while, and your period was about to start just when you got reunited.

Word count: 3,5k 

Masterlist

'Why on earth are you crying?'

***************** 'It can start any time really.'

'What?'

'I mean… look,' you said. Sihtric glanced quickly at your phone, frowned, and brought his eyes back on the road again.

'I don't know what I just looked at, honey.'

'It's my period tracker. The app says my period should start in three days. But it's a little unpredictable, it can happen a few days early or a few days later.'

'Babe,' Sihtric whined, 'are you kidding me? You stopped taking birth control when I was away?'

'No, but I didn't order a new pack in time. I'm sorry, baby, it slipped my mind. I thought I still had a pack when I took the last pill, but it turned out I didn't. And the pharmacy didn't have mine in stock due to some delivery issue, so I was forced to have the seven day break, which happens to be now.'

'Babe,' Sihtric whined again.

'It's not all my fault,' you huffed.

You really thought that having a whole grown man for a boyfriend, who was about 5 years older than you, would not whine like a teenage boy when he heard you were about to have your period.

'No, I know,' Sihtric said, 'I'm not saying that…'

'But…' you frowned.

Sihtric sighed, 'Oh, come on. I haven't seen you in six months, I missed you, baby. I've missed your body and I just really want to have sex with you, okay? It's been a long time and I'm really fucking horny.'

You were both not into having sex while you had your period. And, unfortunately, your period was about to start around the same time that Sihtric, your boyfriend of several years, returned from a six month army training abroad, and you had picked him up just minutes ago. You've been crying so hard ever since you had jumped in his arms, you couldn't possibly drive back home safely, as your eyes kept tearing up every time you looked at him. You had missed him so much and wanted nothing more than to spend the rest of the day in bed with him, but you grimaced at the idea of your period starting while you had sex.

'My pictures weren't satisfying enough these past months?' you frowned.

'Baby, your pictures worked wonders, multiple times a day sometimes, but you know what I mean. Don't tell me you've been completely satisfied by just looking at my pictures or those few rare times we had phone sex.'

'Well, no… I want to have sex with you too, obviously.'

'So you admit you have used my pictures?' Sihtric grinned.

'Really?' you snorted, 'you thought I didn't get off to your risky selfies?'

'I like to believe you are an innocent girl,' Sihtric smiled and slapped your thigh.

'Ouch!' you slapped his arm, 'and, yeah, sure. Because what we did right before you left was so innocent?'

Sihtric bit on his lower lip to suppress a smile when he recalled his last time with you. You already had sex twice the night before his departure, and the following morning once more too, before you accompanied him at the military base to see him off. Once there, you found out you had about half an hour to kill before he had to get ready. So Sihtric had pulled you into his office, closed the blinds, and managed to make you cum three times within that half hour; with his hands, with his tongue and with his cock. You could hardly walk or think straight when he was done with you, and you barely remember seeing him off that day, because all you could think about was the way he had absolutely ravaged you on his desk while he was in uniform. And before he was able to communicate with you and send you some pictures, the memory of that morning had been rather sufficient.

'That's our little secret, lady,' he winked. 

Sihtric absolutely loved having a girl who was a few years younger. He found women of his own age, or a few years older, were often too serious and not risky or adventurous enough for him. He truly felt he had hit the jackpot with you when he met you, years ago, and he was desperate to spend time with you again after being apart.

'Well, regardless, I'm sorry, babe, but I can't control it. All I know is that it didn't start yet.'

'But it can happen anytime?'

'Well, yeah.'

'I've been hard ever since you jumped in my arms, love,' Sihtric groaned, 'what are the odds that it starts today? Like… if I pull over now and take you in the backseat real quick, would we still be ahead of it then?'

'Sihtric, I don't know. It doesn't work like that, it's unpredictable. It's not scheduled like a train arrival or something,' you rolled your eyes.

'At least with trains you know they always arrive late,' Sihtric muttered under his breath.

'What?'

'Nothing, baby.'

You stared at him.

'Well are you going to pull over or what?'

'What?' Sihtric looked back and forth between you and the road, 'you really want me to-', before he finished his sentence, he braked abruptly as he passed an empty parking lot next to a gas station, and he pulled over immediately. You both looked at each other with a cheeky grin after he had shut off the car engine.

'Backseat,' Sihtric said sternly. You loved it when he barked around orders, but only during sexy time. Otherwise you just ignored him, because he'd be in a mood.

You both removed your seatbelt as fast as possible, got out of the car and jumped into the backseat, of which the windows were just dark enough to not see anything through it from the outside at first glance.

You had barely laid down or Sihtric already climbed on top of you, unbuttoning your jeans as you worked his camo jacket.

'Show me those abs, sir, that's an order,' you smiled and bit down on your lip as you ripped his jacket off and pulled his shirt over his head. Sihtric chuckled and pulled down your jeans, and underwear, before he leaned back in. You looked at his muscular body and moved your hands up his torso.

'Hm,' you hummed with a sly smile, 'I've missed that sexy body of yours.'

'Show me how much you've missed it, lady,' Sihtric grinned and pulled you up to him, 'I've been hard at work, training soldiers to protect the country for you, little miss,' he teased, 'so you better give your man a nice ride now.'

'Oh, I'll thank you for your service, big boy,' you chuckled and pulled his cargo pants and boxers down. 

You were to give him one hell of a ride, and luck was on your side it seemed, because when you were done, you still didn't start your period. You continued the road home, which was about an hour long, and as time passed you felt slight stomach cramps, knowing you had just finished in time.

You still couldn't keep your hands, or eyes, off your dark haired man, with his braids on top and curls in the back, so you kissed his lips and his neck at every traffic light. Which made Sihtric so horny again, while still being twenty minutes away from your house, that you had to give him a blowjob while he was driving, because you didn't want to risk having sex again as you felt your period approaching, and he desperately needed to be relieved.

***************

'Hurry, baby!' Sihtric said and sprinted to the front door, 'I want to see Thor. I need to know if he still recognises me.'

'Wait, I want to film this. It's the first time you've been away for so long since we got him!'

You took out your phone, and your keys, ready to film the moment of Sihtric being reunited with your 1 year old Bernese Mountain dog, named Thor.

You opened the door and Thor came storming out right away. Barking, tail wagging, full on dog zoomies as he ran circles around Sihtric, before he jumped up to his chest, taking Sihtric by surprise and causing him to stumble backwards onto the grass. Thor made use of the moment and jumped on Sihtric's chest again, to which he groaned while the dog was licking his face. You were simply crying your eyes out as you filmed the entire moment, and you're not even sure if you had pressed record to be honest. Sihtric eventually fought the dog off and you all managed to get inside the house. 

You made dinner as Sihtric kept Thor entertained. At one point you looked over your shoulder and found Sihtric, shirtless, standing up straight while holding Thor's front paws as he was dancing with the dog to the radio. You cried again and you blamed it on your approaching period. You were so happy to have Sihtric home again, but you couldn't deny you were a little irritated when, later that evening, Thor had jumped into Sihtric's arms and they had been riling each other up; howling like wolves together for 5 minutes straight. You blamed that moodswing on your period as well, but also melted at the sight of your oversized puppy dog in Sihtric's arms as he sat on the couch.

'Excuse me?' you crossed your arms. Sihtric and Thor looked up at you. 

'When is it my turn?' you asked impatiently, looking at the dog in his lap.

Sihtric sighed and looked at Thor. 'It's not my fault, buddy. Mom wants your spot and she needs some loving right now.'

'Yes. And daddy will take you out for a walk later,' you said as you hissed the dog away.

'Babe, don't call me daddy, please,' Sihtric grimaced before he pulled you in his lap, 'here, boy!' Sihtric whistled, and Thor jumped back on the couch, where he tried to shove you away from your man, but you would not let that dog win, because you knew he was cuter than you.

Eventually, you and Sihtric cuddled and talked for hours, catching up on everything that happened the past half year, and you went to bed around midnight, shortly before Sihtric walked the dog.

*****************

'It hurts so bad,' you groaned as you laid in the fetal position. Your period had started shortly after you had gone to bed and the cramps were horrible. You also learned you had run out of the medication you took to help with the pain, so the entire situation just sucked.

Sihtric had found you in bed as you were in pain, and he came up to lay behind you, his arms around your waist and his body fully pressed against yours. 

'Sihtric?' you asked after a few minutes when you heard him sniffle.

'Hm?' he hummed, followed by another sniffle.

'Sihtric,' you glanced over your shoulder, 'are you crying?'

'No,' he lied.

You turned around to face him and you couldn't help but chuckle.

'Why on earth are you crying?'

'I don't like it when you're in pain. I feel so useless. Is there anything I can do right now?'

'Honey,' you clicked your tongue, 'well, I guess you can make me some tea.'

You didn't have to ask twice, Sihtric was already on his way to the kitchen. Not much later he came back with tea, and a heating pad he had found in the cupboard, which he had filled with hot water.

'Here, I found this,' Sihtric said and handed you the heating pad, which you quickly shoved behind your lower back as you sat up in bed.

'I made you chamomile tea with some lavender. I read it's good for period cramps.'

'It is,' you smiled and took the cup, 'thank you, baby.'

You kissed his cheek and started sobbing again.

'What's wrong, my love?'

You gave him a long inaudible answer, due to the ugly crying, but Sihtric figured you said something about strong emotions, your period and something about the full Moon. He wiped your tears away and put his arm around your shoulder while you sipped your tea. When you laid down, Sihtric softly planted kisses on your tummy, and you nearly dozed off already.

'Will you wake me up at seven, sweetie?' you whispered in the dark, 'I have to go to the pharmacy and get those meds.'

'I will,' Sihtric said and kissed your lips before you both fell asleep.

But Sihtric didn't wake you up in the morning. Instead he snuck out of bed, got dressed, had breakfast and came back in the bedroom to kiss your cheek. He waited a short moment to see if you woke up, but you were simply knocked out and didn't even notice he had kissed your cheek.

'I love you, baby,' he whispered in your ear regardless, and gave you another peck on your cheek. Then he quietly walked out of the bedroom and took Thor with him as he walked to the pharmacy on a quiet foggy morning.

Almost an hour later they got back home again, and Sihtric was happy to see you were still asleep when he switched on the lamp on his nightstand. He carefully lifted the blanket up to sneak in bed again but then saw you were laying dead still, in a pool of red. His heart skipped about five beats at the sight. You always had a heavy flow the first two days, but as you often skipped your period, Sihtric didn't know about it. And even if he somehow knew it was probably nothing to be alarmed about, it still triggered his PTSD, bless his job, and he started nudging you awake as fast as he could.

'Baby, wake up. Baby, please,' Sihtric's voice trembled as he tried to wake you up, but it took a moment, as you were sleeping like a rock.

'Wake up! Wake up! Please! Baby!' Sihtric raised his voice as his panic took over, and you finally startled awake.

'Huh? Wh-what?' you blinked rapidly and confused, and before you could even adjust to being awake again, Sihtric had pulled you in his arms, squeezing you so tightly against his chest, you could barely breathe.

You quickly realised what had happened as you felt the wet puddle of blood underneath you and you didn't know if you felt more embarrassed about him seeing you like this, or upset that you had triggered him with a heavy emotion. You managed to calm him down, and he told you there was nothing to be ashamed of.

'It just spooked me because I simply didn't expect it, I'm sorry,' he said.

'No, I should've told you this could happen but I really didn't think about it. I didn't realise it would… I feel so bad. I thought you were more or less okay after all the therapy you had.'

'No, don't feel bad, please. And I am more or less okay, but there will always be this… this part of the trauma that can't be fully erased. And every now and then it comes out when I see a lot of blood out of nowhere. I mean, there's a reason I quit going on missions and switched to giving training. No chances of you know… seeing loads of blood again.'

You both apologised for another 5 minutes while telling each other there was nothing to be sorry for. You quickly went to the bathroom to fix yourself up while Sihtric changed the bed. When done, he pulled you back in his arms again and you fell asleep together until noon. 

When you woke up you realised Sihtric never woke you up in the morning to go to the pharmacy. You groaned and rubbed your eyes, got dressed, and decided to best get going to stop this stupid pain.

You found Sihtric downstairs in the kitchen, shirtless, while Thor was circling around his legs and begging for food. You smiled at the sight of your man in his desert camo sweatpants while his army dog tags and hammer pendant dangled against his muscular chest.

'I made you pancakes,' Sihtric smiled when he saw you. He knew you loved it when he walked around the house without a shirt, so he would always do it when you weren't feeling your best. He also knew you loved pancakes and were in need of comfort food.

'Oh, I also picked up your meds earlier,' he pointed to the table, 'and I bought you ice cream and some chocolate,' he continued as he handed you a plate, 'you can add that to your pancakes. The ice cream and chocolate I mean, not your meds.'

You chuckled and were a little speechless. You figured you should definitely take that 7 day stop more often if this was how he would treat you each time. You grinned and walked up to him.

'Thank you, love,' you said and ran your hands up his torso as you pecked his cheek.

'You're welcome, princess,' Sihtric smiled and pulled you against his warm chest, 'want to watch The Office all day?'

'Yeah,' you chuckled. That show always made you laugh. You walked over to the couch with the pancakes, ice cream and chocolate while Thor followed with begging eyes.

'No,' Sihtric said firmly to the dog when you looked at him. But when you hopped back to the kitchen, to get your painkillers and a drink, Sihtric quickly threw Thor a piece of his pancake. And they looked at each other with a mutual agreement they would not rat each other out. You frowned when you saw the two of them giving you overly innocent looks and rolled your eyes. You weren't a fool. You knew Sihtric was Thor's favourite and Thor was Sihtric's favourite. You had accepted you were second place in both their hearts shortly after you had adopted Thor. They were lucky they were both so damn cute.

'Come here, babe,' Sihtric pulled you in his arms as you hit play on Netflix. Thor gave Sihtric puppy dog eyes for not being in his lap, and Sihtric winked, to which the dog started to wag his tail and stuck his tongue out as he panted, knowing he'd get some cuddles too later.

You watched tv all day and simply cuddled on the couch, doing nothing more than enjoying each other and the fact you were reunited again. You dozed off just before dinner time when Sihtric took the dog for a quick walk, and he ordered a few pizzas for you both to enjoy later. He carried you up to the bedroom, ran downstairs quickly to take the pizzas and called Thor over to come upstairs too. 

Once in bed, you ate pizza, cuddled, and made out, which was rather risky but you both more or less kept your self control. After that, Sihtric massaged your shoulders softly, until you fell asleep in his arms while watching your favourite movie, with Sihtric on your left side and Thor on your right. And despite the cramps, bloodshed and the lack of sex, this was the best reunion you had with Sihtric in all those years. But you were both glad when the week had passed and you could start making up for all that lost time.

*****************

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[v3nusxsky]

Hiya! First of all, I hope you're doing well. Second, I absolutely adore your writing! 🥰 I was wondering if you'd be interested in writing a secret family Lady Lesso x Female!Reader fic. Basically R is Lesso's wife and maybe they have a kid/kids as well, but no one knows until one day R comes to the school in search of Lesso (for whatever reason, it's up to you). And then all the students & other teachers are like "wtf you're married??". Pretty much just fluff with a hint of humour? I thank you in advance, should this catch your interest. ☺️

- 🐈‍⬛

Hidden or unnoticed

*Authors note~ I absolutely love the idea of this trope and request and I'm honoured to have a chance to write it for the first time*

Trigger warning~ none?? Stressed out mother r sick baby

Prompt~ see ask^^^^

It was rare that you needed to get a hold of your wife during school hours. You understand that her work is important to her and truly that you'd have your hands full with your twin son and daughter. You always made sure to have some time with her after she returned to you though. Your children would be down for the night and it gave you time to spend devoted to the redhead. Time you very much cherished. That's not to say that Emerson Allen Kai and Marilyn Isadora Nova Lesso didn't get their mama because they did but you were the stay at home parent and that worked well for your little family unit.

However, today you were out of your depth. Mari seemed to have come down with some illness and nothing was soothing her. When she cried she started Emerson off too and you were losing your mind. You remember the deal you made Nora that when the twins were born, if you ever became overwhelmed you were to find her. Your ability to teleport yourself and others made it easy enough to adhere too. So that's why you bundled up Mari in a beautiful violet swaddle and balanced Emer on your hip before envisioning your wife's office.

Leonora was startled by a high pitch cry coming from her daughter as you and the children suddenly appeared in her office. The unsuspecting Clarissa and Emma startled by the appearance and how rough your appearance was. Why on earth would a stranger pop into her office carrying two infants? Especially when she hardly looked put together. She had to be brave to risk Leonora's wrath. What the two women were not expecting was for the redhead Dean to immediately hurry and take the little boy off your hip.

"Nora" you whimpered feeling like you wanted to tear your hair out, "I don't know what to do she won't stop crying, I can't bring her fever down. Help me" you pleaded the desperation soaking every word. Emerson was placed on the floor where he happily babbled trying to hold himself up into a sitting position. She then took Mari off you and gently rocked her whispering words of reassurance to the infant and you. You stood there helplessly just watching as she soothed your daughter. Her magic glue creating a cooling sensation that she stroked all over her cheeks and forehead.

"Y/n my love come here" she commanded you gently causing your eyes to flicker to Emer who was happily blowing bubbles at Clarissa and Emma giving them his signature cheeky smile that you were so sure he got from your Nora. You collapsed into her side carful of your daughter and began to sob. You felt like you'd failed Marilyn but Leonora seemed to have the gift of soothing her so she must be better than you right? Guilt knowing you carried the twins yet you seemed to not do anything right now.

Marilyn now sleeping Clarissa could see the stranger wasn't much of a stranger so offered to hold the infant while she comforted you. "Thank you, I'd like to hold my wife " she murmured handing over Mari so gently that it was almost as if she'd break.  "Wife?" Emma not so whispered to Clarissa, the shock of knowing Leonora married and no one knew clearly written all over her face.

For some unknown reason your temper seemed to flare and your wife had to hold you tight to her front. "Dove no. She doesn't mean it nastily calm down my love " she whispered pressing kisses into your hair. You could feel the anger and tension fading away until your son cried. It appeared he was rather in tune with your emotions so you immediately came to scoop the crying baby up and rock him gently. "Shh baby boy momma is okay I promise it's okay shhh" perhaps it was the calming whispers of your voice or maybe your heart beating beneath him but he was soon soothed.

Leonora took Mari from Clarissa and came to stand near you, looking like a perfect family in a picture while you were so wrapped up in the comfort of your wife and children you didn't notice the other women slipping from the room to give you all some privacy and not disturb the babies. They'd find Leonora later and try to find out why she didn't tell them. But for now you could just soak up needing your wife to help you get through this difficult day.

Word count~ 895

[rollinouttahere-writes]

Lizard: *who asked Nami if they could stop by a certain island because they have good booze*

Nami: *agreed but made sure that Lizard knew that drinking for her wasn't allowed*

Lizard: *as soon as they land takes Doll to a bar where a drunk woman is whos crying and holding a baby blanket*

Doll: *confused* Lizard what are we doing here?

Lizard: *helps the woman sober up and cleans her up* Doll meet your mother.

Doll: *shocked* But my dad said that...

Lizard: It was all lies. Well apart from the part where hes your dad. This is your mother and he stole you from her years ago.

K: *starting to understand and recognizes Doll and runs over and hugs her* MY BABY. OH MY BABY GIRL. LOOK AT YOU YOU'RE ALL GROWN UP.

Doll: *crying* Hi Mom

"Nami said we weren't allowed to drink, why are we here?" Doll shifted uncomfortably behind Lizard while anxiously picking at her sleeves.

Lizard simply continued to pull her along and stopped at a door at the back of the distillery they were at. She tried to open it, but the knob only rattled in place.

"Unlock this," the order came out shockingly casually.

Doll bristled immediately, "What? No! I'm not breaking into this place, what is wrong with you?!"

"It'll be fine, I know the woman who runs this place, she won't mind. Now get to it, this is important," Lizard leaned against the wall while staring at Doll expectantly.

As much as she wanted to argue, Lizard's stare was impossible for her to argue against. She huffed and grumbled a bit, but ultimately conceded to the demand and dug out her lock picking kit. "I can't believe you're making me do this. How do you even know this person?"

"This was one of the islands we hid out on for a while," the other people in the 'we' being the members of CP9. "We were getting something to eat at a tavern down the road and I got to talking to Kailani because she looked so sad and lonely drinking by herself. I want you to meet her."

Just barely resting a finger on the tension wrench she shoved into the lock, Doll began gently gliding her rake tool in and out of the keyhole. The lock seemed awfully cheap, she'll easily have it unlocked in under a minute.

"Why do you want me to meet her?" Granted, it was always nice to make new friends, but the approach Lizard was taking was bizarre to say the least.

"You'll see, just trust me."

The wrench fell limp, signaling that the door was now unlocked. Doll barely had the chance to stand up straight before Lizard threw open the door and yanked Doll in with her. The door quietly clicked shut behind them.

The strong, but sweet, scent of alcohol assaulted Doll's senses. Being around booze was hardly a first for her, but the potency of it in here was staggering. If they stayed long enough, she's sure she would become intoxicated without ever having ingested a drop.

Strangely enough, it was weirdly familiar. The smell made something in the back of her mind tingle, though she couldn't place how exactly she recognized it or where from.

"There she is," Lizard continued dragging Doll around like, well, a doll. "Hey, Kailani!"

An older woman was standing next to a large pot simmering a dark, thick liquid. She had been carefully skimming foam from the top of it when Lizard called out to her. She startled and almost dropped her sieve into the pot.

"Who the hell are you two?!" Kailani's eyes flicker to Doll and she openly sneers at her, "Get out! I don't want any damn kids back here!" Her eyes were glassy, and it wasn't hard to guess why, especially after she took a swig from the bottle in her other hand.

"C'mon, you know me. I'm Lizard. We talked a few times after meeting at the tavern about a year ago, remember?" Lizard's tone was calm, unbothered by the harsh outburst from Kailani.

Kailani's face scrunched up in thought and she took another drink as she mulled over what Lizard said. After a somewhat lengthy pause, recognition flashed in her eyes, "Lizard... Right, I remember you. Such a strange name." Another sip. "Why are you here again? And why did you break into my store? With that... girl, no less."

For reasons Doll couldn't figure out, Kailani kept glowering at her. Specifically her hair, oddly enough.

"I wanted you to meet my friend." Lizard gently pushed Doll in front of her, "Kailani, this is Doll. Doll, Kailani.

Both of them shared a look of confusion as to why Lizard felt the need to introduce them. Doll muttered out a small 'hello', but the nicety wasn't returned.

"I have work to do, if you're done then please leave," Kailani turned her back to them and went back to monitoring the simmering pot. Unfortunately, she wasn't watching where her hand was going and yelped as she accidentally burned her hand on the cauldron.

The bottle she'd been holding before fell to the floor and shattered on impact. Glass shards scattered everywhere, as did what little rum had been left. A slew of curses shot out of her as she cradled the burnt hand to her chest.

Lizard rushed forward, gently herding her away from the pot and to a nearby chair. She snatched the sieve from Kailani, "I'll go skim it for you, just rest here while Doll fetches some water."

Despite not necessarily getting along with the woman, Doll was quick to do as told and brought some cold water for Kailani to soak her hand in.

An awkward silence hung in the air as Kailani aggressively avoided making eye contact. Doll found herself examining the aging woman's face. Her expression was stern, hardened from what Doll could only assume was years of hardship. No one who's had an easy life could look so mean while having such downcast and sad eyes.

It's understandable why Lizard felt the need to approach her the first time. Even Doll found herself wanting to give the woman a hug.

The back door they'd sneaked in through opened and closed, making Doll tense up and whip around to see who else was in here with them now.

"Kailani, you left the door unlocked. Again. One of these days someone is going to steal you poor." Another woman rounded the corner, she looked to be similar in age to Kailani, but perhaps a little younger. She stopped dead in her tracks when she spotted Doll and Lizard, "Who are you?!"

While Doll was panicking and stammering for a response, Lizard answered casually, "We're friends with Kailani and just stopped by to say hi."

"Really now?" She looked to Kailani for confirmation.

"I know her," Kailani nodded at Lizard. "We met last year and talked a little. No clue who this girl is. What are you doing here, Malana?"

"Hardly sounds like you're friends to me," Malana sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, "And I'm here because it's noon, and I brought some food so that you don't drink your lunch again."

She strode over to where Kailani was seated and leveled Doll with a hard stare. At first, her expression was annoyed more than anything, but then her brows furrowed. Malana dropped the food onto a table next to her and grabbed Doll by the chin while looking her over. Doll tried to pull away, but her grip was strong.

"How old are you?" Malana's voice was so low that Doll could just barely make out what she said.

"Um, I-I'm fifteen?" The intensity of her gaze was downright intimidating.

Her eyes widened at this answer, "What's your name?" Both of her hands dropped and tightly gripped Doll's shoulders.

Before Doll could answer, Lizard did so for her. "She goes by Doll now, but her real name is (Y/N)."

Kailani's head snapped up so fast that it could be heard cracking. For the first time, she fully looked Doll in the eye, her own were wide and wild. "(Y/N)?" The small water basin in her lap fell to the ground as she launched herself out of the chair and held onto Doll as if she would disappear if she didn't. Doll stumbled, but just barely managed to remain upright. Malana was speaking but she couldn't make out a word of it over Kailani's hysterical sobbing.

"(Y/N), my (Y/N), my baby!" She pulled back slightly and cradled Doll's face in her work-weathered hands, "I thought I would never see you again!" Once again, Doll's face was squished against the woman's chest as she held onto her with all her strength.

Doll had no idea what was happening. She managed to twist her head enough to look for Lizard in hopes that she might have an answer.

Lizard was standing only a few steps away, "This is your mother. She never died, Shanks kidnapped you in the middle of the night while she slept."

Her once tense posture fell limp as Doll went into what she could only describe as being a state of shock. "What?"

"He lied to you, he's been lying to you for years."

Malana had joined in on the hug, aggressively squeezing both Doll and Kailani, "I can't believe you're here!" She let go and rushed for the door while scrubbing the tears off her face, "Stay put, I'll go get everyone else!"

As the door slammed behind her, two things were on Doll's mind. One, that she was going to savor every single second of this reunion, and two...

She was going to kill Shanks for what he's done.

[blueesnow]

(6/6) Kotobuki Reiji's Private Story [Utapri Live Emotion]

Ch 1: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 6 with Reiji)

-TV Station's Hallway- Reiji: Kouhai-chan! Talk about a coincidence, did you have work on this location too? Haruka: Kotobuki-senpai! Thank you for your hard work. I've just finished with my work and decided to go home just now. Reiji: Really? I'm also done with my work. Somehow it kinda feels like fate, don't you think~♪ Reiji: That's right, if you're free right now can I take a little bit of your time? Onii-san will take you to a very good place☆ -VIP Room- Haruka: Um…Kotobuki-senpai, why are we here…? Reiji: Why you ask, because we came here to eat aren't we. Remember the upcoming CM that I was supposed to take a part of, you're the one in charge of the music, right? Reiji: So basically this is my way of thanks in advance☆ Once again thank you for accepting the request even though it was on such a short notice. Haruka: …Don't tell me the job that I take this time was thanks to Kotobuki-senpai's recommendation? Reiji: Correct~! Actually the composer that was originally chosen by the client suddenly cancelled y'know. Reiji: So one of the staff asked me whether I know any other good composer for the replacement. Reiji: The answer is obviously yes 'cuz there's only one person that came to mind☆ The songs that you made always resonate within my heart, so I'm sure it'll turn out good. Reiji: In conclusion, this meal is my way of showing my gratitude. I'd be happy if you could accept it without any hesitation. Haruka: So that's how it is… Thank you very much. Haruka: (Although I'm still a little bit hesitant, hearing that made me happy. But is it okay for me to receive all of this…?) Reiji: Your shoulders are all stiff, relax won't you. You don't have to be so on guard 'cuz there's only you and I in this room.

Ch 2: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 11 with Reiji)

-VIP Room- Reiji: It's time to dig in~ …Mm, that's delicious! I've ordered a lot so you can choose which one you like Kouhai-chan. Haruka: Oh, thank you. Um… either one looks delicious I'm troubled to which one to to eat… Reiji: Well then how about this pincho? It's cute and easy to eat right. Here, let me feed you, say ah~☆ (choices) <I can eat it by myself…!> Haruka: It's okay, I can eat it by myself…! *noms* *chews* Reiji: Fufu, your cheeks looks like a squirrel. Seeing you eating like that made me want to try it too. Reiji: Well then let's take one. …Mm, it's delicious. This one is pretty good too. <It's embarrassing> Haruka: I-It's embarrassing, so I'm going to eat it by myself. *noms* …Mmm, it's really delicious! Reiji: A~aa, I've been rejected. Rei-chan is sad~ Reiji: …Just kidding, Rei-chan is hardly one to give up, so I'm just going to look out for the next opportunity☆ Here, eat the other one too. (back to story) Haruka: Well then, thanks for the food. …Mm, this one is also tasty! Reiji: I'm really glad that I called you out earlier today. I've been wanting to have a nice chat with you just the two of us like this. Reiji: I'm even more fired up than usual for this upcoming CM. I mean the one who write the song will be you after all. Reiji: Not to mention there's also a location shooting in UK too♪ It's my favorite country you see, so I've been looking forward for it ever since. Haruka: I'm sure it'll turn out into a fun shoot. Though speaking about UK, the thing that immediately came to my mind first is…probably British Rock. Reiji: Oh, I also like that one too. Other than rock, I also have CDs with various genres, such as country or jazz music. Haruka: Really!? Um, if you don't mind may I borrow it sometime? I'd like to use it as a reference while I'm writing songs. Reiji: Oh, it's perfectly okay~ I'll bring it over next time and hand it to you☆ You can go ahead and use them as references! Reiji: …As I thought, Kouhai-chan really do love music huh.

Ch 3: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 21 with Reiji)

-VIP Room- Reiji: To think you were so hesitant just a while ago during mealtime, but now you became much more assertive once you're in work mode. Haruka: I-I'm so sorry, I got way too excited. Reiji: It's perfectly OK☆ Being able to honestly express that you like what you like is a wonderful thing. Reiji: I'm sure there was once a time when I was as pure as you are~ I wonder just where exactly did I lose it? Haruka: That's not true. Kotobuki-senpai looked so much bright and happy when he was talking about U.K earlier, and I think it's so wonderfull! Reiji: Eh, really? To think that you complimented me, I'm getting embarrassed~☆ Reiji: I have always been attracted to UK's culture and fashion you see. Reiji: So I always tends to choose a Union Jack pattern for my belongings. Look, just like this keychain. Haruka: Wow, it looks great…! Looks like you'll be able to buy more new things on your next job location. Reiji: That's right, I'd love to see a lot of things but… Unfortunately I don't think I'll have much time for shopping this time. Reiji: If you want to properly enjoy the charms of UK, as I thought you should just go there by yourself on a private trip. Reiji: There's also lot of places that I want to explore on my own pace too. Shall we go there together and have fun just the two of us? Haruka: Eh…!? Reiji: Whoa wait a minute, you look way too surprised! I'm just kidding. Right now I have to do my best on the CM job☆ Reiji: Thanks for today, I had a lot of fun thanks to you. Let's go out for a meal again together!

Ch 4: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 31 with Reiji)

-Radio Station- Reiji: Good morning~! Wait, Kouhai-chan!? What are you doing here today? Haruka: Good morning! Actually one of the people that I had a meeting with today was actually a staff member from this radio station. Haruka: When I was talking about Kotobuki-senpai, they invited me out to come here to take a look. Reiji: Hmm~? You bad girl, to think that you were trying to make a rumour and gossiping about me right behind my back. Haruka: A rumour, that's not it! It's just that… Reiji: Oh no~, is it something that you can't talk to me? Is it about how unremarkable I am despite my long career in the　entertainment industry or the fact that I'm loud…? Haruka: Eh, I never thought of that before! What we were talking about was… (choices) <About how amazing Senpai is!> Haruka: I got so passionate talking about how amazing Senpai is! Reiji: Heh~ So that's how it is. Rei-chan's impressed! Reiji: To think you can be that passionate when talking about me, can you tell me what part of me that's amazing in your eyes? <All of them are all compliments> Haruka: They were all nothing but compliments. As soon as we talked about it I can't seem to stop. Reiji: That much? Now I'm suddenly curious about the contents of it~ Reiji: Please tell me, Kouhai-chan. Just how do I look like in your eyes? (back to story) Haruka: That's… it's embarrassing to talk about it right in front of the person himself. Reiji: Eh, don't be cold like that☆ Come on, it'll be easier if we just talk it out quickly, right~? Interviewer: Everyone, we're going to start the recording meeting now. Please gather round! Reiji: What a shame, looks like it's time over. …Oh well, let's do our best for today, shall we. Reiji: I'm going to work hard even more so that I could get more compliments from you♪ Speaking is one of my forte after all, look forward to it okay!

Ch 5: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 41 with Reiji)

-Radio Station- Reiji: Dear listeners, hustle muscle~! I'll be your main radio host for today, Kotobuki Reiji☆ Haruka: (The recording has started…! What kind of show will it turn out to be) Reiji: We've received a lot of letters asking for life advice this time. Starting from our very first letter with radio name, "Mijuku Tamago"-san. Reiji: "I want to invite my crush to go out, but I'm afraid to get rejected. If it's Rei-chan, then what would you do in my place?" Haruka: (Looks like everyone have a lot of worries. What would Kotobuki-senpai reply…) Reiji: Yeah, I get you~ Love is something that tends to make us look like a scaredy cat. Reiji: I'd probably going to make a lot of excuses so that I wouldn't get rejected. Like inviting them in regarding of works, or maybe as a thanks or something☆ Reiji: Having a tactics in love is a must. It's okay to cheat just a little, right? I hope your feelings will reach them someday! Reiji: Now, on to the next person~! With radio name, "Rei-chan Love Girl"-san. Reiji: Thank you, My girl! *kiss* Now on to your worries~ …Hmm. Reiji: "My head is so full of Rei-chan that I can't seem to concentrate on anything. I even keep making a mistake during my job. What do you think I should do?" Reiji: I'm happy to hear that you're always thinking of me 24/7. But making a mistake during work is painful, isn't it. Reiji: I also don't want to make you suffering. To me, as long as my fans stay smiling is already one of my happiness. Reiji: Even if you don't force yourself to try to remember me, I will always be in your heart. And that's why please treasure yourself more dearly. Reiji: Now then, who's next~?

Ch 6: (unlocked if you reached intimacy lvl 51 with Reiji)

-Radio Station- Reiji: Dear listeners, did you have a good time? That'll be it for today. See you again☆ Reiji: …Thank you very much! I'll be in your care for the next time as well! - Haruka: Kotobuki-senpai, thank you for all of your hard work. The recording really went successfully…! Reiji: Thanks, Kouhai-chan! Looks like you enjoyed it too. Haruka: Yes! I was especially touched during your response to all of the letters asking for life advice. Haruka: It's as if you shared the pain as well with the senders, and how you give so much comforting words to them… Haruka: Now I really understand why you were loved so much by your fans, Kotobuki-senpai. Reiji: Understand why I was loved, huh. Then, Kouhai-chan…have you fallen for me now? Haruka: Yes, I really and helplessly fallen in love with Kotobuki-senpai's speaking ability! Reiji: Whoa—! As expected, Kouhai-chan is so blinding~! But, thanks for the compliment☆ Reiji: Since you can't use facial expression or movement during radio, you need the ability to convey your feelings and thoughts through words. Reiji: That's why I always try to be more aware of the listener's presence and speak as if they're right next to me. Reiji: And because you were here today, somehow I felt much more closer to all of my fans. Thank you. Haruka: Likewise. I also managed to see a new side of Kotobuki-senpai for today, and that really made my day. Reiji: If it's like that, then you're welcome to come and check me out on my job again. I'm going to show you a lot of my different sides.

[destiny-in-the-universe]

So I just started a new show...

I figured I might as well give this show a go! I've yet to get past the first episode so I figured why not share my first impression.

First, the show's known as Xiaolin Showdown, following four students who are warriors and have to retrieve different items known as the "Shen Gon Wu", all while trying to defeat great foes. We're introduced to our short but well-spirited main character Omi and this kid is definitely sheltered but I have to enjoy his dedication- he strives to be the best. I'm not entirely sure how to feel about his character, so we'll just have to wait and see!

Then we have Raimundo, a young boy who I believe is Hispanic (?) - he's the prankster of the main four; he doesn't seem to be as concerned with what is happening, but this is just based on a first impression! I'm quite curious to see how he grows throughout the series.

Followed by Kimiko, and arguably my favorite so far, she's the only girl of the group and always seems to have a new electronic device on her person. While she does seem particularly tech-savvy, Kimiko appears to have a heart of gold and seems very free-spirited (much like the next character in point!). As before, I hardly anything about her but I'm curious about her heh-

Last in the party is Clay- a young cowboy turned monk. He's the most down to earth of all of them and honestly, is pretty chill. I can't say too much because he didn't fully have a lot of screen-time but he certainly represents his element well!

All four of them are to become the Xiaolin Dragons and protect their home while making sure these various magical artifacts can be protected and brought back to the temple in which they live. The animation of the show seems ever so slightly shoddy, though that might just be because I had to use a different site to watch it heh-

However, the lore is already proven interesting and the background characters (though especially the dragon - unfortunately I can't remember his name) are also pretty fun!

Unfortunately, the villain seems rather generic but who knows- perhaps they'll expand on his character a little more... as the series progresses because I just finished watching the first episode and am about to start the second one. Honestly, it's off to a promising start, but I still need to get a feel of the show to say the least!

The other title villain known as Wu Ya definitely has more promise than wannabe Jack Spicer but we'll see where this continues- now that I've hopped the train of warrior-ninja based shows, I cannot seem to stop but so far, the series that continues taking the lead is Randy Cunningham pfft though what's the harm in one more? We'll see where this takes me!

[coraniaid]

3 + Fuffy

(Angst/fluff prompt list)

OK, I'm a few months late, but at least I managed to get this finished in the right calendar year. I couldn't decide which season I wanted to set this in so I went with: well, basically all of them.

I

"I've got you," Faith almost blurted out once on patrol, like the worst kind of idiot. 

They'd been talking, the way they used to back then, about nothing in particular.  Just filling in the time between the next vamp nest, really, as they walked from one cemetery to another. Buffy had been complaining about something terrible her kid sister had done: borrowed her lipstick or torn an old pair of jeans, or lost something she’d been reading for school, or something ridiculous like that.  Faith hadn’t really been paying a whole lot of attention, at least not to anything Buffy was saying. 

“Don’t get me wrong,” Buffy had finished.  “I love Dawn.  I do.  She’s just … she kind of drives me crazy sometimes.  Or all the time, actually.”

(And yeah, years later somebody will explain to Faith that Dawn wasn't ever really there, that some weird old monks just made her think she was for some reason.  This conversation never really happened.  Whatever. It's how Faith remembers it. It’s real to her.)

“Do you … uh.  Do you have anyone like that, back home?” Buffy had asked her.  Hadn’t asked her.  Whatever.

Buffy used to do that a lot, in those early weeks in Sunnydale, before everything had gone wrong.  Ask her about things “back home”, as if Faith had had a home to go back to.  As if she hadn’t counted herself lucky to get out of Boston alive with the clothes on her back.  As if her mom would have even noticed she was gone back when she was alive.  As if the only person in Boston who’d ever believed in her hadn’t gotten torn to pieces for being such an idiot. 

And yeah, Faith hadn’t really ever sat Buffy down and filled her in on things, but she’d dropped plenty of hints.  More than plenty.  They’d just all fallen on deaf ears.  It was like Buffy didn’t understand there were people out there who had it worse than she did.  Like she couldn’t quite grasp that Faith didn’t have some perfect little nuclear family of her own hidden away somewhere.  Like she didn’t realize just how lucky she was to have her Mom and her sister and their perfect house in the suburbs.

As far as Faith was concerned, the Sunnydale Motor Inn was the closest thing to home she had.  Which was … well, it was a good thing she had plenty of vamps and demons to take her anger out on. But there was someone she cared about, sure.  A reason she was still hanging around in town, even with the creep who killed Diana dead and no sign of any new Watcher arriving to try to tell her what to do next. Buffy wasn't exactly wrong about that.

I’ve got you, Faith hadn’t said.  You drive me crazy enough for anyone, but you’re mine.  You’re the only reason I didn’t clear out of town while Kakistos’s dust was still warm.

She’d almost said it, but she'd managed to restrain herself.  Hadn’t quite been that stupid. Hadn't ever been quite that naive. 

Things with Buffy were complicated. Complicated enough that she hadn’t been totally sure they were even friends.  Not really.  It wasn’t like they really hung out much when they weren’t on patrol.  She was hardly inviting Buffy over for sleepovers at her crappy little motel, and she could count the number of times she’d been invited over to Buffy’s place on the fingers of one hand.  On the thumbs of one hand, even.  Maybe they didn’t have much else in common.  Buffy had her Mom and her sister, and her Watcher, and school, and Red and Xander and all her other little hangers-on, and Faith … didn’t.  

Maybe she only wanted to think she had Buffy because, if she didn’t, she had jack squat.

The thought of Buffy staring at her blankly while Faith muttered awkwardly about what she meant to her, before making some kind of excuse to leave and then laughing at her later behind her back with all of her real friends …  she just couldn’t stand that.  Better by far to leave it all unsaid.  Better to be alone than to be a loser.

Besides, you couldn’t trust people.  She’d been starting to forget that, after running a timber beam through Kakistos’s dead and rotten heart.  Getting a bit soft, maybe.  A bit too comfortable. 

No matter.  Buffy had helped teach her that lesson again soon enough.  Her supposedly dead vamp boyfriend had been alive all this time. The other Slayer had been rushing off to make out with him in the dark when she’d told Faith she was heading home, probably laughing herself sick at how easy she was to fool. And all those moments Faith had thought they’d shared on patrol meant nothing after all.

II

I’ve got you now, Faith had thought weeks later, dancing side by side with Buffy in the Bronze,  The real you. All to myself. 

She’s not sure, looking back, why she’d only thought the words. The music was deafening enough that Buffy wouldn’t have heard her even if she had said them out loud.  Probably not even if she’d shouted it.  Maybe that’s the answer.

Maybe she was never going to be part of Buffy’s inner circle.  Maybe she’d never be invited to secret little Scooby Gang meetings at the school library; maybe she’d only ever be grudgingly let into the softer parts of Buffy’s life.  The big suburban house; the dinner table and the kitchen where Buffy still pretended to just be a normal girl.  The kind of good little girl who followed orders and played nice with others and who could ever be satisfied by a craving for low-fat yogurt.

Maybe, for a while, that had made her angry.

But now, with the music loud and the other Slayer next to her, maybe that didn’t matter. The crowd around them didn’t matter.  All that mattered was that, when it counted – in the dark, out on patrol, outnumbered and surrounded, with adrenaline flooding through them, with their hearts racing together in tandem – she and Buffy were the same.  Two Slayers, when everyone said there was only supposed to be one.  It didn’t matter that only one of them got the Watcher and the Mom and the simpering little gang of school friends.  Not really.  When it really mattered, Buffy was hers.

Because she and Buffy were the same, she’d always known that.  She’d been sure of it.  Sure that, deep down, Buffy felt it too.  And now, finally, Buffy was starting to admit it.

She’d not even minded when Buffy had run off to climb all over her pet vampire, wrapping her in her arms the way she never would hold Faith.

(Sure, she’d been kind of pissed when Buffy had abandoned her at Christmas to go and make up with him.  She could admit that much, to herself if nobody else.  But it didn’t matter.  It didn’t. If she danced a little harder with the remaining boys, and smirked in Angel’s direction when Buffy marched back to pluck her out of the crowd … well, she was just having fun, right?  Just trying to make the big guy jealous.)

Days later, on their way to deal with another demon creep, she’d almost worked up the nerve to say it out loud.  To try to put it all into words, the way she wanted to.  She’d been sure, this time, that Buffy wouldn’t be able to deny it.

Just one more vamp to dust, and then, maybe–

(“Faith, no!” she’d heard Buffy shout at her, just a few seconds too late. And she'd keep hearing it  ever since, night after night, year after year.)

III

“I’ve got you,” Faith gloated out loud once, when she thought she’d managed to surprise her.

That was supposed to have been her big moment. Her moment in the spotlight. The big dramatic reveal.

“Bondage’s a good look on you,” she’d told Buffy approvingly once Angelus had gotten her chained up.  “‘Course, the outfit’s all wrong, but …”

She trailed off, waggled her eyebrows suggestively. No point trying to be subtle now.  Besides, she’d have been lying if she pretended not to be enjoying this. She’d never really fit into Buffy’s life the way she’d wanted.  Never been convincing playing the part of the little loyal sidekick.  Always chafed a little at the role of watchdog. Maybe this town wasn’t big enough for two Chosen Ones after all.

It was just like people had been telling her all her life.  She was a loser.  An embarrassment.  A bad influence, a bad daughter, a bad girl.  Why not a bad Slayer too?

Well, she’d show them bad, all right.  She’d show them real evil.   The world had treated her like crap for years before she’d gotten her powers, and maybe she was owed a little payback.  Maybe the next time the Mayor wanted one of B’s little friends taken care of, she’d volunteer for the job herself.  That’d impress him, wouldn’t it?  He appreciated her for the things she was good at, even if nobody else ever would.  If she was going to take orders from anyone, why not him? And that little witch Red had always made it clear how little she respected her. She was practically asking for it, wasn't she?

Thinking about it, maybe killing that poor sap Finch was the best thing that’d ever happened to her.   Sure, kind of crappy luck for the guy himself, but it wasn't like people like him really mattered anyway, in the big picture.  And it had helped to shake her out of her stupid little crush.  Helped her realize that Buffy was only ever going to treat her like shit.  Always going to look down on her, like she wasn’t quite good enough.  Like the other Slayer was just destined to be better than her, all along.

“I am better than you,” Buffy had told her coldly.  “Always have been.”

That was when things had started going wrong, Faith thinks later.  Even before the other Slayer had slipped out of her chains; even before that lousy vamp with a soul had revealed he’d been playing her the whole time.  She’d poured her heart out, thinking it was safe, and Buffy hadn’t followed the script like she was supposed to.  She’d been supposed to be scared.  She’d been supposed to be afraid.  She’d been supposed to be impressed.

Not that Faith could blame her for saying that, exactly.  It wasn’t as if she hadn’t dared her to do it. It wasn’t as if she was wrong.  Buffy wasn’t like her after all.  Not yet.

IV

Now I’ve got you, Faith had thought, as the knife had slipped up past her ribs, in a brief moment of clarity before the pain. You’re just like me after all.

Maybe she’d never matter to Buffy the way she wanted, but this was a moment that would tie them together forever.  Victim and perpetrator.  Murderer and corpse.  They’d both know, now, that there wasn’t much between them.  That Faith could have had it all if she’d just gotten a little bit more luck.  

It hurt, sure – it hurt worse than anything she could remember feeling for years – but it was a good kind of pain.  Because it meant she was right.  Had been right, all along.  It was proof.

Proof that their golden Slayer was a killer too.  Just like Faith.  That she enjoyed it; that she got off on it.  That there was something sick and evil inside her, something bad and dark and wrong.   Just like Faith.

In another life, it could've been Buffy slitting throats on the Mayor’s orders. Buffy lurking in the dark while Faith basked in the adulation of her own little Scooby Gang.  Everyone had to see that now.  Buffy herself had to see it.

(Not that Faith wanted that for herself. She'd been better off this way, whatever anybody else thought. Only … it meant something, that Buffy could've been like this too. That she'd only ever been pretending to be better than this.)

After she fell, she’d had one more glimpse of her – the other Slayer, looking down at her, just she’d always wanted – but she’d known that, whatever it looked like, she’d won.  She couldn’t keep her eyes open, couldn’t stop the world from going dark, but she’d felt herself smiling at the end.  She didn't have to fight anymore.  She’d won, whatever Buffy thought.

She’d been wrong about that though.  Buffy wasn’t just like her after all.  She hadn’t been ready.  She’d missed her heart.

V

“I’ve got you,” Faith had told the stolen face she saw looking back at her in the bathroom mirror.

She couldn’t quite believe it.  It didn’t sound right, coming out of that mouth.  It was missing something, some undertone or accent that she wasn’t quite pulling off.  Didn’t sound like she meant it.  She tried again.  Tried all sorts of things.  Over and over until she was laughing hysterically.  Until she was sick with it.

Because she’d won, hadn’t she?  The police were dragging Little Miss Perfect off to rot away in jail for the rest of her life – and why not, when you thought about it; wasn’t she an attempted murderer too? – the Council was going to leave her alone, and now, finally, she had it all.  The mom, the kid sister, the perfect house.  The perfect life.

And she’d fooled them.  Fooled all of them.  The mom, and the sister, and all of Buffy’s little friends.  They thought she was her.  The other one.  Which had to mean they were the same, didn’t it?

She just wasn’t enjoying it the way she knew that she should be.

Something must’ve gone wrong with the Mayor’s parting gift, she’d told herself. When she’d switched, something else must have come along with her.  Something dark and sick and evil.   It had to be the spell, didn’t it?  It couldn’t be her.  She was like Buffy.  She wasn’t like that.

She’d washed herself, in that stolen bathroom, over and over again.  So many times.  Enough, surely, that she should have washed away the dirt.  But why didn’t she feel clean?  What had Buffy done to her?  She’d infected her, that was it.  Done something to make her weak.  To make her wrong.

And somehow it all got mixed up in her head.  Her and Buffy; strength and weakness, victory and defeat.  When she’d saved that girl in the Bronze, she’d just been doing what Buffy would have done, right?  Just trying to keep her cover.  So why did she feel like throwing up when the girl had stammered out her gratitude?  Why did it feel so weird to have saved a person’s life?  When she’d made it to the airport, why had she turned back?  Vampires killed people in Sunnydale all the time.  That was why the boss had built the town in the first place.  Who had she thought she was fooling?  Had she thought anybody would be impressed if she got herself killed fighting some ugly vampire instead of slinking off into the darkness?

That little voice, telling her that it would be wrong to turn away, that she didn’t really have a choice about what to do: that hadn’t been her, had it?  She was better than that, smarter than that.  Wasn’t she?  She’d only ever been pretending.  Hadn’t she?

It was almost a relief, in the end, when Buffy had tracked her down, however disgusting it had felt to see herself looking at her in judgment.  It had almost felt better when she’d opened her eyes to find herself in her own body again.  She hadn’t been ready either.

VI

"I've got you," she’d whispered to herself in prison at night, one finger tracing the faint scar Buffy’s knife had left behind.  The mark Buffy had made on her, more than two years ago now.  It wouldn’t fade, wouldn’t heal.  She didn’t want it to.  Some things never go away, she’d told herself.

Not every night, of course.  But some nights.  The bad nights.  Most nights. It was … comforting, in a weird way.

Buffy was out there somewhere, probably not even thinking about Faith at all, but that was okay.  She’d made her mark on Faith already.  She’d given her something to remember her by.

There were never meant to be two of them.  She got that now.  She was only an accident.  An afterthought.  Maybe that’s why she was never quite good enough, why she was never able to make herself fit into the story the way that everybody told her she should.  However hard she tried, whatever she told herself, there was only one Chosen One – one girl in all the world, just like Diana had told her back in Boston – only it wasn’t her.  It never could have been her.

“This isn’t about Buffy,” Angel had told her, more than once.  He didn’t get it.  

Maybe it was true for him.  Sure, he'd loved Buffy, she knew that – hell, probably still did – but he’d been alive (or undead) for centuries before he ever met her, had done most of his most evil fucked up shit before ever laying eyes on her.  For him, maybe redemption really was more about brooding and posing in the shadows and thinking about the past and all the other things he told her about when he came to visit each month.  

But for Faith, those two things – the way she felt about Buffy and the way she felt about herself – were pretty much inseparable.

She’d thought they were going to be inseparable, for a while.  The two of them: her and Buffy.   And in a way, she was right.  When it got bad in prison – whenever the walls seemed too close or the other inmates seemed too loud or one of the new girls got it into her head to try something stupid –  Faith would imagine the Buffy in her head, and ask her what she would do about it.  That’s what doing the right thing meant, wasn’t it?  That was why she’d let them lock her up.  Because Buffy had said that this was where she belonged.

Buffy wouldn’t want her to hurt anyone else, so she didn’t, however easy and satisfying it would be.  When the guards pushed her around, she let them, and just thought about how she’d disarm them and fight back if she wanted.  When a new arrival looking to make a name for herself came out with a homemade shiv, Faith took the weapon away from her but let her keep the arm that held it.   Buffy wouldn’t want her to do anything else. 

And Buffy wouldn’t want her to leave, so she wasn’t going to do that either.  Nobody here could have stopped her, after all.  Not the guards, not any of the other inmates.  Not even Angel, if it came down to it.  Nobody could stop her.

(Except you, the Buffy in her head had whispered.  You can stop you.)

But sometimes – not too often, but more times than she’d have ever admitted to anyone – Faith let herself daydream about getting out.  Not escaping, but something else.  About showing up for her monthly visit from the outside world one day to see a new face waiting for her behind the glass. A familiar face. Not Angel, but Buffy. She used to let herself pretend that – if she just waited and worked hard enough – the other Slayer might smile at her again.  Tell her that she’d done enough.  That she was forgiven.  

Except that that Buffy – the Buffy she still talked to in her head sometimes, the one who knew anything about what she was going through in prison – wasn't real.  Faith knew that.

The real Buffy – the Buffy living it up on campus still, the one Angel never tells her anything about – she was never going to do anything like that.  She was never going to show up here wanting to talk like old times. She was never ever going to forgive her, no matter what Faith did with her life, and who could even blame her for that?  Faith wasn’t quite crazy enough to think she could ever earn any forgiveness.  Not after everything she’d done.

Still, the scar tissue on her skin was real, wasn’t it?  It proved something.  Maybe Buffy had moved on, but that didn’t mean she’d never cared.  They had a history, even if they didn’t have a future.  

They were connected, the two of them. Always would be.  Bound together by blood and scars.

VII

“I’ve got you,” she’d said without thinking at the end of the world. 

Buffy had been doing this a lot longer than she had by this point – though it hadn’t exactly been her first apocalypse either – but somehow Faith had gotten the sense that this one was different somehow for her.  Not necessarily because the stakes were higher (you couldn’t get much more serious than the end of the world), or the threat was more powerful (she hadn’t been around to see it herself, but Buffy had fought a god two years ago, which had to trump some mean old ghost with delusions of importance).  But just because Buffy was … older.  Tired.  Somewhere along the line Faith had realized that Buffy wasn’t expecting to make it through this one.

She would though.  That was why Faith was here.  Why she’d come back.  Why she’d broken out of prison and gotten herself into trouble with the law all over again.  Because Buffy needed her – because they all needed her – and it was the right thing to do.   The only thing she could do, after everything.

She’d spent so long as a kid looking up at Buffy – wanting her approval, her attention, her life – but coming back to Sunnydale she’d realized that she’d somehow never seen Buffy at all.  She’d seen the Mom and the sister but she’d never seen how afraid Buffy was of hurting them, or doing something that would make them reject her.  She’d seen the garden and the kitchen and the big childhood bedroom, but she’d never seen how fragile they were; how carefully Buffy had to step to stop herself from breaking them.  She’d seen how much Buffy had, and she’d ached with want for it, but she’d never asked herself how Buffy was able to carry it all without collapsing.

She’d tried playacting as Buffy once before – stealing her face, parroting her lines – but it was only this year that she’d tried to really become her.  To do what Buffy did, everyday.   And not because she was taking that away from her – whatever people thought, that little mutiny hadn’t been her idea, she’d never wanted that – but because Buffy had asked her to do it.  Begged her, almost. Whether you wanted it or not, she’d told her, their lives are yours.  Protect them.

So she’d tried.  Tried harder than she’d even tried before.

She’d hated it.  She’d been awful at it.  And she’d failed.  To nobody’s surprise, she guessed, she still wasn’t good enough.  She just couldn’t do it.  She wasn’t built to be a leader, to make plans or speeches or inspire.  That wasn’t her.  It never would be her.  And that was okay.  She didn’t want to be Buffy.  

If she was honest with herself, she’d never wanted to be Buffy.  Not really.  She’d wanted … well, she didn’t have the words for it.  She’d never had the right words to tell Buffy what she wanted.

But when she’d looked Buffy in the eyes, later, in those caves under the world, neither of them sure whether this was the end or not, she’d thought that maybe, for the first time, all of that was okay.  Maybe they didn’t need words.  Maybe they never truly had.

VIII

Now “I’ve got you,” Buffy promises when Faith wakes up in a panic in the middle of the night, briefly unsure of where she is or how many years it's been. “It’s going to be okay.”

She still has nightmares, sometimes.  About growing up; about Boston; about Diana; about prison.  And about all the messed up things she did.  Lester Worth, begging for his life.  Allan Finch, bleeding out in an alley.  If you’re a screamer, feel free and go on then, give us a kiss and  holding a blade to poor Joyce’s throat.  Still remembers the look on Dawn’s face when the kid – the same little kid who'd used to think she was some kind of badass superhero – had seen her for what she truly was.  An animal.  A monster.

And in her nightmares, that’s who she still is.  Who she’ll always be, no matter how much she plays at being redeemed.  Something broken and empty and unloveable.  Something the demons and vampires have their own nightmares about, not because she’s a Slayer like Buffy but because they can tell she’s something even worse than they are.  

In her nightmares – in the worst of them – she wins.  The Council lock Buffy up and let Faith step into her stolen life, and the Mayor ascends and Sunnydale burns, and Mrs Post tells her what a good job she did helping her kill Giles, and she sticks a kitchen knife in Joyce’s back and cuts Wesley's throat and Angel turns to dust in the rain in some dingy little alley.  And nobody dares look at her or question her or stop her from taking what she wants. Nobody tries to stop her. She wins, and none of it comes close to filling up the hole inside of her that grows and grows until it swallows up the world.

But when she wakes up, she’s safe.  Because then the nightmares don’t seem so bad.  Buffy puts her arms around her, in the big soft bed they share, promises to look after her, and she falls asleep listening to the other Slayer breathing.

She still has nightmares, sometimes, but it’s getting better.  She’s getting better.

And "I've got you," Buffy purrs again on other nights, when they make it back home late after patrol.  After she ushers Faith upstairs, arm curled possessively around her waist.  After Faith helps unbutton and unzip the other Slayer’s leather jacket, after she watches her pull her shirt over her head in one smooth graceful motion, silently gazing at the sight of the other Slayer in the moonlight..  Mouth gone dry, not wanting to speak in case she shatters the image of confidence and cool she’s sure at least the younger Slayers still buy into, the illusion a part of her still hopes Buffy sees.

Not that she had much chance of maintaining that image here anyway, kneeling as she is on the floor by Buffy’s bed, half-naked herself, staring up worshipfully at the other Slayer.  Fighting down the urge to pinch herself, not quite believing this could be real.  Feeling just like she had that first night, years ago now, not long after Sunnydale sunk into the desert, as Buffy stands over her and runs her fingers over her bare shoulders.

"I've got you," the other Slayer says once more, almost wonderingly, like she still can't quite believe it either, and all Faith can do is nod, trembling and eager.

Ever since Faith came to Sunnydale she’s been defined by what she isn't.  By not being Buffy. She’s been the second Slayer, the backup, the unnecessary spare.  The reckless one, the sloppy one. The mistake, the murderer. The bad Slayer.  The killer. The monster.

But now, after all these years, things are different.  They make sense of each other now, in a way they’d never managed then.

"Who's my girl?" Buffy asks her, voice low and husky, lips close enough to almost brush against her neck, and Faith can't help but shiver in anticipation. Can't help but be amazed, even now, that Buffy Summers is talking about her like this. That Buffy’s hands are touching her, that the other Slayer wants her the way that Faith’s always wanted - aways needed – Buffy, that she spends her nights after patrol in Buffy’s bed.  In their bed, together. 

 Buffy's hand slides down her cheek, tilts her chin up slightly so they’re making eye contact.  The other Slayer leans forward and kisses her gently on the forehead.  Reminds her, a little sternly now, that she asked her a question.

“Me,” Faith says, voice suddenly hoarse, suddenly almost shy, however ridiculous that seems. “I’m yours, B.” 

For a moment, watching the slow, satisfied smile that spreads across Buffy’s face, Faith thinks about how they ended up here.  About how impossible it had seemed to her, back then, that this could ever happen.  That anybody - but especially Buffy - could ever look at her, and know her, and really want her.  Not just for a quick fuck, not just because they needed her help for something, but like this.  To want her, the real her.  To want to be with her; to build some kind of life together. 

Then Buffy’s kissing her again – hungrily, greedily – and Faith stops thinking about anything else. She leans into the kiss instead, breathing into Buffy all the devotion and desire she’s never quite been able to articulate. 

She’s got her. Of course she does.  She has done since almost the night they met. Since the night they'd killed Kakistos together. She’s got her. She’s hers.  She’s Buffy’s. 

[jgetsbig]

What got you into gaining? And do you ever see yourself going beyond your current goal weight?

Great questions!

How did I get into gaining? Well, I guess I have always just wanted to be bigger. I was always the skinny, wimpy kid and was picked on ruthlessly in school. I mean, when your 17 and hardly weight over 100lbs soaking wet, you're an easy target. Anyway, my desire to be bigger has always kinda been there. I remember, when I was about 16-17, I discovered belly inflation vids on YT. That in turn led me to gainer channels as well. The idea of purposely gaining weight excited me, and still does, and so I told myself that one day I would give it a go myself. Fast forward to mid 2023, at 24 y/o, I finally decided that time was now. I quickly put on about 10lbs in a few months, which essentially just made me look somewhat normal for a guy my height. My gains accelerated through the winter into this year and I've now gained about 30lbs. I honestly have never felt happy mentally or as positive about my body, and that feel is amazing! The fact that those feelings also keep growing as I do is even more amazing!

Now, as for my goal weight, I'm honestly not sure. My main goal obviously is to get to that weight first lol. But I have said since I've started that if I'm still not happy with that number, I will go a bit further in order to be fully happy with my body. The number is just merely that, a number and no 2 people look the same at the same weight. I have a particular body type in mind more than a weight, but I do think that I can obtain the body I want around my goal weight, if that makes sense.

With that said, how much further am I willing to go? Well, I would say that like 280, maybe a bit more would be my personal max. I fully intend on gaining but I refuse to let it affect my health, because then that'll make me feel bad again about myself, and that's what I don't want.

[accio-sriracha]

Sirius Black Was Nothing If Not Consistent.

BECAUSE I HATE MYSELF AND WANT TO TORTURE ALL OF YOU.

Based on this post here: <3

(I recommend reading it first for context)

~~~ ~~~

As he stood with his back to the wall, Harry Potter kicking open the door only inches from his shoulder, Sirius felt his life unravel around him.

Harry was the spitting image of his father... except those eyes.

The same vibrant green he remembered as Lily's.

Harry had the same spirit as his parents, unafraid, caring, willing to throw himself into harms way to save the people he loved.

Sirius hadn't been listening to their quiet humblings until he heard Harry's name.

"Harry, it's a trap-"

"What-"

It was Harry's voice, and Merlin did he sound like James.

The red haired kid was staring at Sirius over Harry's shoulder, "He's the dog... He's an Animagus."

Sirius closed the door so they could see him better, which slammed shut with a loud bang. He could see them all jump.

He cursed the worn hinges. This was the same room he and Remus had shared all those years ago. The door would slam shut even then, sometimes giving them away to James and Peter.

The thought of his wretched name made Sirius focus again. He was here for Pettigrew. He couldn't get distracted.

He tried to smile to soften the blow as he disarmed them, catching Harry's and the girl's wand. He could tell the smile didn't quiet turn out right. It had been so very long since he had tried.

"I thought you'd come and help your friend." His voice was hoarse from being unused all those years, clearing his throat hardly helped, "Your father would have done the same for me. Brave of you, not to run for a teacher. I'm grateful... it will make everything easier..."

He thought of McGonagall. Of the betrayal he knew he would find there. He thought of Sprout and Flitwick.

Professors he had once truly cared for.

Professors who now knew him only as a traitor.

Nobody knew the truth. He needed Harry to understand.

Harry lurched towards him, speaking of James had upset him greatly, Sirius could understand why. With what Harry must think of him...

"If you want to kill Harry, you'll have to kill us too!" The other kid shouted, swaying on his feet as he stood to protect him.

Sirius startled. Those would have been some of James' last words....

They would have been Lily's dying breath.

He didn't want to hurt Harry. He wished he could make them see that. No, these things are hard to be undone. It would take time to gain their trust.

"Lie down." He said quietly to the boy, who seemed to love Harry the way Sirius had loved his father, "You will damage that leg even more."

"Did you hear me? You'll have to kill all three of us!" He called, ignoring him, needing to lean on Harry just to stay standing.

"There'll be only one murder here tonight." He could feel himself smile slightly. He couldn't help it.

The last twelve years he'd dreamed of this day. Of avenging his best friends and killing Peter Pettigrew once and for all.

Harry snarled at him, a nasty sound Sirius wasn't sure should ever belong to a kid like him. His eyes flashed with fury,

"Why's that?" He spat, struggling against his friend's hold, "Didn't care last time, did you? Didn't mind slaughtering all those muggles to get at Pettigrew... what's the matter? Gone soft in Azkaban?"

Sirius knew Harry was angry, he knew he had the right to be, so he tried not to react even as the mention of the horrible place brought a chill to his very bones.

No, he thought, The opposite. I'm far worse than I've ever been before.

He didn't say this. Wouldn't dare. Not in the face of Harry's grief. He would have to make things right.

Harry's friends tried to get Harry to stop, he didn't listen, his voice echoing off the walls of the shack as he roared,

"HE KILLED MY MUM AND DAD!"

And Sirius knew exactly how he felt. He knew that passion. That desperation. He knew it because it was a part of him, engraved in his every inch of his soul.

He thought of his manic blindness towards anything that wasn't Pettigrew these last few weeks.

No. He didn't blame Harry for hating him.

It was because of this thought he didn't struggle when Harry broke free and lunged at him.

It was with that thought Sirius let him rip the wands from his hands, he didn't fight even as Harry's fist connected with Sirius' head, both of them flying backwards to the wall.

Punch after punch, Sirius refused to give in. Eventually, when he could hear Pettigrew's squeak from the corner, he knew he had to make his move quickly.

"No. I've waited too long." He tried to shove him off with little success. He really had gone weak in Azkaban, all that time starving himself and he'd left any muscle he had behind him in that cell.

He didn't want to hurt the kid, but he also didn't have a winning chance at a fair fight and they both knew it.

Holding Harry's neck, he grabbed him and pushed him off, dropping him with a pained grunt.

Crookshanks had grown agitated, flying into the mix along with Ron as they wrestled Sirius away from the wands.

Harry shouted something at the cat, and Crookshanks ran away again.

Sirius was panting, sunken against the wall and hardly able to move. The kid had fight, he'd give him that. The bruises that now caused throbbing pain all over Sirius' body could attest to it.

Harry approached him, wand pointed at Sirius' heart.

"Going to kill me, Harry?" He whispered.

Harry stopped right above him, "You killed my parents." His voice shook, but his wand held steady.

Sirius wondered what James would think of his boy now, brave and sure even in the face of what he believed was great danger.

Harry was right. Sirius was responsible. He should have never talked James into allowing Peter to be the Secret Keeper. He should have never trusted anyone but himself to keep them safe.

"I don't deny it." His voice was broken, "But if you knew the whole story-"

"The whole story?" Harry repeated, almost exasperated, "You sold them to Voldemort. That's all I need to know."

And this kid, this beautiful, brave kid, made Sirius so proud he wanted to cry. His fierce protectiveness of James and Lily, the loyalty that he displayed on his expression with pride.

Sirius wished he could make him understand,

"You've got to listen to me," He started, trying to express the urgency he felt, "You'll regret it if you don't... you don't understand..."

"I understand a lot better than you think." He said, his eyes narrowed, "You never heard her, did you? My mum... trying to stop Voldemort killing me... and you did that... you did it..."

Before either of them could say another word, Crookshanks leapt past Harry onto Sirius' chest. After the last short eternity Sirius had spent holed up in this shack with nothing but the cranky old cat for company, he felt moved by the gesture. Harry muttered and tried to push him off.

Crookshanks sunk his claws into Sirius' robes painfully, refusing to budge.

Sirius watched the indecision on his face, until finally he raised his wand, seemingly uncaring for the cat that sat between them.

He hesitated. Seconds turned to minutes. Harry stood there, wand poised, Sirius staring up at him, Crookshanks on his chest.

Then came a sound. A horrible, horrible sound.

Footsteps.

Someone was moving downstairs, obviously they had witnessed the group go through the tunnel and followed after them.

Sirius felt a pang of guilt, remembering the last time he'd convinced someone to follow after them, nearly letting Severus get killed in the process.

The girl began shouting immediately, "We're up here! We're up here- Sirius Black- quick!"

Sirius felt his heart begin to race.

He was going back to Azkaban.

His lungs stopped working entirely. He didn't have enough time. He needed to kill Peter. He needed to explain.

He shivered, hard, nearly enough to knock Crookshanks off of his chest.

Harry's expression hardened, his wand gripped tight.

Footsteps thundered up the steps.

Harry still hadn't done anything.

Sirius still hadn't exposed Pettigrew.

The door burst open with a shower of red sparks and Harry wheeled around, his face was that of relief.

Sirius' next thought was a simple one: Please don't let it be McGonagall.

And it wasn't.

It was so much worse.

Remus Lupin came hurtling into the room, his face a pale white, his wand raised and ready.

He looked to the kids, lying on the floor by the bed, then to Harry, who stood there with his wand half raised.

And then their eyes met.

For a second- a fleeting, hopeful second- Sirius swore he saw that familiar spark of trust.

And he was right.

Remus disarmed them all with a move so fast none of them could have seen it coming.

He was still staring at Sirius, the longer they met eyes the softer Remus' expression grew. Sirius could see it clearly, the sorrow, the grief, twelve years had aged them both.

Sirius could only hope Remus' had been easier.

When Remus spoke, memories crashed over Sirius, Remus' voice shook with a similar feeling, the immense loss that cradled them, the love they had once shared,

"Where is he, Sirius?"

Sirius felt shock hit him in waves.

Remus trusted him. Remus knew about Peter. He wasn't going to Azkaban.

On the surface, he kept his cool mask, raising a skeletal finger towards the pathetic rat across the room.

"But then..." Remus whispered, looking at Sirius like he always used to, as if the answers were written across his face, "...why hasn't he shown himself before now? Unless-"

Remus' eyes suddenly widened, "unless he was the one... unless you switched...without telling me?"

Sirius couldn't bare to look away, couldn't think of anything past this feeling. Remus would finally understand.

All of those years of pain and torture had lead him to this very moment.

Slowly, watching every minute detail of his expression, Sirius nodded.

And the relief that flooded Remus was nearly tangible. His lips brushed upwards, ever so slightly, in a smile.

"Professor." Harry interrupted loudly, "What's going on?"

But neither of them were listening, Remus was lowering his wand, moving to stand beside him. He grabbed Sirius hand and pulled him up to his feet.

And he embraced him.

Grief and hatred and guilt fell away from them in that moment. Nothing mattered more than the feeling of Remus holding him in his arms.

He wanted to sob. He wanted to scream and shout and jump around proclaiming his love to anyone who would listen.

Remus forgave him.

In that moment he'd forgotten all about Peter. All about James and Lily's son. All about his plan to avenge them.

None of it mattered. Not when he could see the love still flickering behind his eyes.

Remus forgave him.

If Sirius had learned anything in the last twelve years he'd spent alone.

He had learned that was more than enough.

He smiled at him, not as difficult as it had been only minutes ago.

And Remus smiled back.

Sirius could die happy right there, in Remus' arms, without a care in the world.

[justatalkingface]

The 'Great' MHA Read Along, Part Four (Chapters 12-21): Team Deathmatch!

So, first thing, we have a bunch of reporters creeping on kids for news. I... am not a fan of this. Like, I get that, in story, heroes are celebrities, and so UA is effectively a school about becoming famous, but I've never been a fan of this kind of paparazzi, or that kind of fame in general.

More relevantly, since this is a school to, among other things, turn these kids into celebrities...why do we never see them prepare the students for that fact? There's a bare nod to rescuing people later on (hardly enough for how important that is, and even that is in the License Exam, and it's implied 1A was never taught about that at all... for reasons, presumably the same reason Aizawa never mentioned that literally everyone is going to try and murder them in the exam... and outside of right now, where it doesn't happen, I don't think we ever see them train in that) and from there how to interact with victims, but for such a media dominated field, you'd think there'd be classes on, you know, how to talk to a reporter. And, sure, maybe there's some on later, but they've already been getting field work by that point, for years, well publicized field work, so it feels just a tad too late at that point.

Anyways, obvious focus on the UA Barrier for later, then straight to evaluations, where Aizawa tells Bakugou to stop acting like a seven year old'

...

Because, you know, that's how all seven year olds behave, I guess.

All those seven year old children, trying to murder anyone they don't like, stabbing people with knives, smashing each in the head with crowbars, you know, normal stuff. Kids being kids, amiright?

Then we turn to Izuku, and while, yes, Izuku not breaking his arm would be good.... do you, perchance, have a suggestion to help with that goal, Aizawa? You know, as his teacher? Who is supposed to teach him things?

Ah, yes, there it is: I want to see some sweat out of you. 'Work hard, Izuku, because clearly, the catastrophic, crippling injuries you've been dealing to yourself, which must be agonizing, aren't enough incentive for you to improve; clearly you're just being lazy here, and there's no other potential factors holding you back from improving beyond this disappointing performance.'

Sweet flying fuck, how in the hell did this guy train Shinsou? 'Here's the scarf, figure it out, I want to see results by tomorrow?'

And then they just move on, so... I guess only Bakugou and Midoriya get called out in class. Cool, cool.

Hmm. Alright, so we next we get some actual school shenanigans, and I... have mixed feelings about this.

On one hand, this is exactly the character developing, 'let it breath' stuff we've been wanting in MHA current for... years now, basiclly. Paying attention to characters when they're not actively fighting and what not is something essential for making them seem less like characters and more like people, which... you kinda want for a good story.

On the other hand, I just find this boring. I wasn't interested in who gets to be student president last time, and I'm not really now, either.

(As a side note, it's hyped up as being SPECIAL and HEROIC and IMPORTANT FOR DEVELOPING A HEROIC FOUNDATION, or whatever, which is why we're supposed to care about it, but all of that never happens, so... that's a lie. Also, kinda dumb? This isn't a military organization, there's no real reason to train heroes to command other heroes.)

Here's the thing: the content, itself, isn't the problem; a great story writer can make even the most boring shit seem interesting. I vividly remember a manga about farming, for example. Just farming, before anyone starts thinking of whatever farm Isekei may come to mind. On the face of it, that may sound boring, but it was engrossing all the same, because of how well it was written, how involved the characters were in process. There's shonen stories that manage to make the 'school' part of the story just as interesting as the, 'And now you and me fight' parts, but MHA... just isn't it. If I had to guess, it's probably how dismissive the story is about those parts; before we even get to that, after all, we already have Aizawa making it clear how useless and superflicious normal schooling is, and he continues that stance well into the story.

If one of the main characters of the story, here being Aizawa (AKA the teacher who is heavily emphasized in story about how 'wise' he is), is dismissive about something, and there's nothing in story to really counter that perception, then yeah, the story probably isn't going to be covering that topic in an interesting way.

TLDR: I don't think Hori doesn't give a shit about the 'Academia' part of My Hero Academia, and it shows.

Anyways, there's some pointless school drama, and the only things I'm getting out of it outside of some foundational character stuff is that: the kids are all idiots, with how they were mobbing when the alarm went off (and the teachers are alarmingly absent when said alarm went off; shouldn't a security alert be when you secure the children?), Iida is too pure for this world, and god that whiplash is going to hit hard, and finally that U.A. is way too OK with the fact that someone broke in.

(Well, that and, for all that I'm very much not a fan of pushy reporters invading things they have no right to... Present Mic literally says that this is going from illegal trespassing into villainy. How?????

Seriously, how?! The only thing they're doing, beyond the trespassing, is... ignoring them and being assholish about questions?

Why in the actual fuck is he asking permission to blow them away!? Mic???? I thought you were the good teacher! )

Anyways, Izuku dodges dealing with shyness, Iida gets promoted over Momo to be president, and Nezu gets to sound ridiculous talking about an 'element of evil'. Yeah.

Next chapter: We see All Might using his time in a far more productive way, and a nod to the fact that heroes jobs are literally built around crime happening.

That's exactly how I responded when I first heard Izuku told Bakugou about OFA, All Might! (Although, Izuku explicitly says he didn't tell his mom, so... what did he say? There's a serious conversation here that we're just not getting.)

*Snort*

'Dark forces would flow forth in legions'. I mean, he's not wrong, but All Might only barely pulls that off because he's, like I said, hammier than ham in general, but the fact all the heroes randomly have asides like that, no matter how serious they are, was always jarring about this early on stuff.

...'Trial' of Rescue? It makes it sound like your testing them on stuff they should have no way of possibly knowing; if things went differently, would you have threatened to expel the last place student here as well, Aizawa? NGL, though, feels weird that costumes are optional for this because 'they might not be adapted'. I mean... for all the shit you dump on them to force them to adapt, you'd think doing things in your costume, that you are potentially going to be wearing all the time, would be an obvious choice. Wouldn't it be better to figure out if your costume needs work now rather than later?

And why are costumes in the classroom...? I mean, they'll need to leave to change anyways, it'd make a lot more sense to just have a changing area where the costumes are stored at.

Bus time.

You know, one of the things that strikes me, here, is how everyone is acting; there is no fear, loathing or shunning of Bakugou for happened last arc, not only for the murder attempt they never properly reacted to, but to the savage beating they were begging All Might to stop the fight over... but, they're not admiring him, either. There's friendly teasing at his expense, even.

And it's like... the fight never happened, in their minds (or Bakugou attacking Izuku on Day One, for that matter). They're acting like they know Bakugou only as a competent, if abrasive, student, and are treating him accordingly. It's kinda fascinating, really, because later they'll forget all of Bakugou's sins, of course, but that's only part of it: they'll fawn over him, because they only get to see this idealized version of Bakugou. Here? They just aren't responding to the worse parts, but they're still generally treating Bakugou like you'd expect someone like Bakugou would be treated. From my perspective of the very ends of the manga, it's really interesting to see this, like an AU where Bakugou both as a person and a character was treated more seriously in the story.

Gotta love that Kaminari Truth Bomb, lol.

Also, for how short this is: the characters are all interacting with each, it's light-hearted and non-serious, the ingredients are the same as they were before, but this is a lot more interesting to read for me than the Class President stuff was. More evidence My Hero Not Academia, I guess.

And now we've arrived at the USJ proper and, again, waaaay too big; the fucking budget this one school has has to be bigger than the budget of some small countries. And... 13 created this? By herself? Yet again, UA teachers have way too much freedom in school, for no apparent reason, because the way this is phrased makes it sound like this entire, giant ass facility, is 13's facility.

All Might: saves people, rather than try (and fail) to teach.

Eraserhead: hOw IRRatiONal.

I get he was supposed to be here, and he is failing as a teacher, but acting like he's being an utter moron by doing his other actual job is a bit much; here starts the point where All Might never gets a win... ever again, really. It's not All Might if someone's not metaphorically kicking him, after all.

You know, for how much of a non-character 13 ends up being, this five seconds of her is really refreshing: this conversation she's having, about how, you know, 'Quirks are dangerous, let's all try not to hurt someone with them' is exactly the conversation you'd think would have started the school year off with; she feels like a lot more realistic teacher than anyone we've seen thus far.

I guess that why Kurogiri's coming to shut her up then, right? We can't have a teacher actually teaching in UA!

....You know, it's easy to forget how weird Tomura was drawn early on. His image is far more... stark than we get later on, more focus on his wrinkles and the shadows on his face; it gives me some Uncanny Valley vibes. Actually, I can really see all the weird-ass horror hand stuff Hori eventually ends up doing in this, because he just looks wrong in some fundamental way, like he doesn't fit in the setting properly.

I've said this before, but I never liked early Tomura, because of how dumb he felt, but if Hori had leaned into this version more, him being off instead of him being childish, it would have made him feel a lot more threatening. But... after this one of his main pieces of characterization is going to be throwing fits, so...

...

Actually, I'm hitting pause here.

So. I, among others, talk about how bad a teacher Aizawa is, but I don't think I've spelled out how dangerous that could be, beyond ruining the students education, if a man in his position was viewed as fundamentally untrustworthy by the students he's in charge of. What we have here is a perfect time to discuss that!

Let's picture the scene, everybody: a dark portal opens, and bunch of weird people rush in. Aizawa goes into Serious Mode, puts on his goggles, and leaps into action, loudly declaring that, 'THOSE ARE VILLIANS!'

Now we turn to students: they look at Aizawa, see how serious he's acting.... and then remember how serious he looked yesterday, right before he told them that the big thing they were worried about was a 'logical ruse'.

Their panic calms slightly, and they think about the situation again from a new light.

What's more likely? That a giant horde of villains have broken into UA facility, famed for how safe it is, staffed by actual heroes? Into a building that is presumably secured and closed off to the public at all times? That they knew to break in now, of all times, just when the class went on a field trip? To a training facility?

Or, that Aizawa is giving them a 'logical ruse' again, with 13 in on it this time, and all these 'villains' are actors to help them learn better? (Just to be clear, here, that's basiclly what happens in the actual License Exam later on: Gang Orca, who is canonly one of the scariest heroes around, 'breaks into' the rescue focused exam with an army of mooks and starts throwing down like he's an actual villain. The only thing that separates this theoretical situation from that actual exam is that it was clear in the exam that the 'villains' were part of the exam.) And that, once they get this little skit out of the way, they'll reveal the joke, mock you if you fall for it, again (that is if Aizawa doesn't threaten to expel you for failing his standards... again), and then everyone will get on with the training.

So, the thing is, in dangerous situations, you need to make the right choice right away; if Iida was more on the ball, for example, maybe he could have escaped the USJ before Kurogiri made his way over to them, and gotten help for everyone that much sooner.

Hesitation, in other words, leads to disaster.

Do you know what's worse than hesitation in a dangerous situation?

Thinking your teacher is punking you like you're on some hidden camera show, and acting accordingly.

Imagine what could have happened when the students were all randomly separated and dropped before packs of villains, if they thought the villains were acting? What could have happened if a bunch of kids, kids with no combat training (beyond Shoto, who had training, and Bakugou, whose trigger happy instincts would have come in handy for once instead of being a dangerous liability), were placed in front of a bunch of people out to murder them, while they treated the situation like a game?

Hell, what if the kids rushed in to fight the villains before that happened, while Eraserhead was bogged down by charging head first into the army of mooks? (Also, couldn't he have... not done that? Some kind of collaborative attack with 13, where she attacks them while Eraserhead nerfs them, maybe? For all that Eraserhead is apparently specialized in a group fight, the guy with no offensive Quirk against a small army seems... a flawed choice.) They're trying to be heroes, after all: brave, probably eager to fight and flex their Quirks some more after a lifetime of keeping them suppressed, of not being allowed to use this intrinsic part of themselves all out. Besides, fighting the 'villains' sounds like a great way to get a good grade, right?

It gets even worse when the villains explain their goals: to kill All Might.

All Might is, let me remind you, the guy who punched a bunch of slime so hard that it started to rain. While he was weakened, no less.

All Might, while he's branded as the Symbol of Peace, is more honestly the Symbol of Victory, more than Bakugou ever will be: he effortlessly crushes every obstacle before him, doing it all with a smile and a quip, throughout his entire career. The peace he is so famous for is built on the idea that he never loses, and that this is a universally acknowledged fact.

He is so strong, so overwhelmingly competent, that he has made Japan, as a nation, simultaneously safer and more willing to sit on their hands and do nothing. He is so unstoppably successful at his job that Endeavour, who is second only to All Might himself (by... whatever metric that's judged off of), gets a villainous backstory trying to keep up with him.

In MHA, before the main story happens, a bunch of randos saying that they're going to kill All Might is like me saying I'm going to beat up Mount Everest.

It's ludicrous, in other words. Anyone saying it is either actively insane... or clearly lying through their teeth.

If Shigaraki's Uncanny Valley factor was just a little weaker, just a little less alarming, if they decided Aizawa was just lying to them again, and that this was just another example of UA's extreme training philosophy, they could have been slaughtered because this man couldn't be bothered to put the effort into his actual job, which he is getting paid for, and focus on his students in any real way.

This is the problem with Aizawa, the Teacher. As a hero, sure, he's great, and him jumping right away to defending the kids is good and all, but as a teacher? He is so fucking lazy that his students could have been, and in all honesty should have been, killed because they have no reason to trust his directions, especially in a serious, unusual situation.

If you can't trust the person in charge of you to make wise decisions in times of danger, or this case communicate those decisions to you and be trusted, then they are a liability, and for a man in Aizawa's situation, with his job, his responsibility to these kids? That is unacceptable.

...

Anyways. Villains show up, Eraserhead wades in (and then Hori makes sure to have Izuku and Shigaraki talk him up! You're so cool, Eraserhead! Make sure the readers know just how awesome you are as you effortlessly plow through the mooks! And I love how he punches a guy twice his size, who is made out of rock, and sends this guy flying, somehow, and doesn't break his hand in the process), then Kurogiri rolls up, monologues like an edgelord, and yeets all the kids, but not before the Bakugou and Kirishima dynamic is founded by.... failing utterly.

*sigh*

Seriously, Mineta? You're half drowned and in serious risk of getting murdered, and now you perv? This is why he's so hated, BTW: not because he's a pervert, but because that's almost his entire characterization. Jiraiya is a creepy, spying pervert as well, sure, but he's beloved by the Naruto fandom because he does all this other stuff that isn't being a creep, that makes him seem like an interesting person. He has relationships, and develops more, that don't revolve around breasts, which gives us a good, humanizing take on him beyond that character flaw.

Mineta's second character trait after being a pervert is being a coward, and... I don't think he really has friends? It's not a good look, to say the least. And yes, I know he gets a 'brave moment' here, where he surpasses his cowardice.... that is to say, where he literally throws things from a distance, but that happens for... all of two panels, and isn't that impressive even when it does happen. Then afterwards it's right back to normal. The notes say Hori had a hard time balancing his character against Hori's natural perviness, and honestly I'm just surprised this is the balanced version?

Anyways, everyone has to fight, and we see Izuku have to deal with the situation. He forces his way past his fear, his hesitation, to the realization he has to act, and then commits to it.

He observes the situation, comes to several realizations from what he sees, from how the villains act and the environment they're in. Then he comes up with an unorthodox plan, built around using his classmates various abilities effectively, and then executes it, claiming an overwhelming victory despite the odds against him.

This, all of this? All of this is far more interesting to read than his fights have been lately. This Izuku is easier to root for, easier to be concerned about, easier to like, than when we know he's going to beat everyone else up because he's OP. He's relatable like this, and that is a magic word for keeping people involved in your story.

Then everyone else fights, and most of it isn't that interesting. One notable one is the Momo, Kaminari and Jirou fight where: they also come up with a creative plan to win, Momo gets to use her powers usefully.... and then Kiminari is literally nerfed into being an idiotic pervert (like the one we already have isn't enough?), while Momo's shirt is torn off. Because of course. Then Kiminari is beat up for the suffering the mental version of Izuku's bone breaking side effect, because he can't win anything; god, it must suck to be him.

...Do you know how surreal it feels to watch Tomura be competent? Seriously, he's in a hand to hand brawl with Eraserhead, doing well despite the fact this should be something he doesn't actually do that often, considering his Quirk, he's calculating Aizawa's weak points... this guy feels like a threat, and I don't usually have that impression of him until the Villain Arc. I... I'm genuinely wondering if he always was this threatening, far more than I remember, and that some bad takes on him became the most memorable trait of him that became his fanon characterization, or he gets nerfed after his introduction like All Might was.

Ah, the Classic Noumu. The very one that screwed up my view on every other version; god, this one is a monster. He's an impossible behemoth of a thing, easily beating every enemy he comes against, crushing Eraserhead as a brutal introduction. Great first impression, but he makes all the other versions until the High Ends show up seem bizarrely weak for all the fuss they get.

And then All Might comes in.

And he isn't smiling.

Remember in an earlier post how I mentioned that All Might acts hammy to appear non-threatening? Well, I feel validated. (You know, until he promptly loses.)

...That is Actually Bowser. There's actually a Bowser-lite character, canonly, in MHA. Huh.

Anyways, it's faced up against Serious Might that makes Noumu seem that big of a threat, the fact that Tomura takes his arrival so well makes him that much more disturbing; I keep saying this, but this arc was a damn good intro for him.

Oh, hey! Remember when the strongest warper in setting was a threat in combat? This arc does; an ability like that could be lethal if used right, and it's nice seeing that in action, when later Kurogiri is devolved in a largely passive porter for The Team.

And then Izuku charges in! And then Bakugou... 'helps', ugh. I've gotten spoiled by all the chapters where he was 'dead'; I forgot how much he used to be shoved into every possible situation, in the best possible way to make his otherwise alarming behavior look good.

Like. He's not doing the right thing here, like everyone else is (even Shoto, who feels disconnected from the situation). He's doing what he wants, and it's just happening to help everyone else, yet it's getting shown as the 'right' thing. It's just frustrating for him to get these 'hero' shots of him looking and acting unhinged, but knowing I'm supposed to find that heroic.

And here, Tomura is pointing out what I pointed out earlier: All Might's 'peace' is based on the threat of superior violence, which... is quickly ignored because he's a murder hobo. Mixed feelings about that; as a character, for where he is in the story, for who he's supposed to be, he's exactly the kind of person to act off that logic, but he does have a good point, and I don't think anyone else brings it up, really? All Might being dissed for being All Might later is based off him no longer being a hero, and society is falling apart and all that, never that the peace itself is based off the threat of him.

...That said, why the hell doesn't All Might just... grab the Noumu again? If Kurogiri isn't hard countering that kind of thing, there's nothing really stopping All Might from grabbing the Noumu's wrist and just yeeting the guy. It's a big, dramatic moment, I get it, overcoming the shock absorption with power and sheer determination, but it's also dumb.

Also, hope that Noumu doesn't land in anybody's house or anything, lol.

Eight or nine last minute saves later, and it's all over save for the All For One introduction; ah, the nostalgia of 'Sensei', plotting from the shadows. I missed him being threatening.

Minor thing, but I like that brief moment of humanizing on the previously aloof Shoto when he realized Hagakure was there when he was fighting, it's a nice touch showing that he's more than his facade without slapping us in the face with it, a good setup for later.

Oh, and here's some extra Aizawa hypocrisy for you: he goes on and on about how bad Izuku is at taking care of himself, but we got a butcher's bill about all the damage inflicted on him. Next day? He shows up mummified. Great example, there; and it's set up just to show how.... badass he is, I guess? But it's annoying that they went through all that work setting up how badly he's damaged just to gloss over it, and yet Izuku's injuries are about to be taken seriously.

Awkward end of chapter cliffhanger!

[mysticbeaver]

Your opinion on all the side characters? Or what you like or dislike in each of them?

Thanks for the ask, and it's a long one! Nice for a change. Let's see...

- Jonny 2x4 - one of the characters I'm guilty of neglecting... But I think he's a fun, quirky kid (even when he's supposed to be annoying). I remember when I first watched Dear Ed (where he got in a fight with Plank) the scene at the playground made me sad for him. It seems to me there's not much Jonny fanart here on tumblr compared to how Plank and him are considered icons of the show elsewhere. That's probably what makes some like me less interested in the character... I hardly react to pics of real Plank IRL, sorry Plank fans 😅

- Sarah - she's fun... c'mon! Again, non-tumblr fans are on a different planet, the hate boners people have for a 6-7(?) year-old character are entertaining... for a while. I love that she's actually intimidating and strong, she ain't just bark and no bite, another less slapstick-focused show would have handled her differently. A lot of people cheer for the scene where Ed shouts at her in Little Ed Blue, cause they want to see her get "just desserts", but I never care about that, I like her for the rabid little princess she is lol. I also like people's headcanons of her treating her brother better as she grows up, and hopefully escaping the unhealthy favoritism from her parents.

- Jimmy -  even more than Sarah, the hate he sometimes gets is really tedious to me... he's always entertaining, especially his "theatre kid" moments, and his squeaky voice borders on "dog frequencies" sometimes haha. The only thing I've found slightly odd is maybe his flaws and negative traits (spoiled, Sarah always has his back, secretly a cunning little bastard) are sometimes given a free pass just because he's queer-coded, maybe? This only ever bothered me exclusively in relation to someone like Kevin being written off instead, but this my own bias, just a lighthearted observation (for real tho please tell me if this is a dumb reasoning)

- Nazz - she's the nicest and most well-adjusted "normal" kid around (if you ask me kevin ain't normal haha), but had an unfortunate starting point of "girl all the boys have a crush on", which she was never developed out of, or at least not nearly enough as she should have been. I've read something about the writers struggling to figure out what to do with her, maybe? Can't remember. Some people point out her hidden intelligence, but I think it would also be interesting to explore her negative traits, mainly I see her as slightly two-faced/flighty when it comes to how she interacts with the Eds.

Kevin - oh boy, my sense of this character is probably so skewed... The one character I used to get upset and annoyed about like an idiot, in regards to other people's takes and such, sometimes I resent the fact I ever got fixated on the character... why??? Help 🤣 I guess what torments me is that the viewer was never really meant to like him or find him interesting in any way? and doing otherwise is just a case of "fandom brainrot", I dunno what others think 😵‍💫 His jerk/bully role is definitely handled in more interesting ways than other shows would, there's enough meat to the character I guess it's possible to be invested in headcanons/developments. (or so I convince myself...)

Without getting too rambling, let's just say I love him as much as I'd find it entertaining to see him get incinerated by a flamethrower lmao.

Rolf - my other favorite ofc, and a much more pleasant one lol. Nothing embarrassing about loving this character, for sure. In fact I'm probably guilty of not seeing his flaws, but I guess he can be arrogant, and violent/gross with his traditions, when he could learn to be lenient considering how he's treated with a fair amount of tolerance by the cul-de-sac. But in the end he's just a kid trying to get used to a new land and culture.

Kanker sisters - I never thought much about Lee but my eyes have been opened by the implication that being the oldest one in a tough family/social background kinda excuses a lot of her behavior... But others can analyse this better than me.

I think Marie is the unfortunate middle sister who maybe had the least distinct personality? (beyond her aesthetic hinting at her being a punk chick), thankfully she's got plenty fans (btw her being underdeveloped is more food for thought for marie x nazz/nazzarie 👀...). I haven't got much to say unfortunately, other than my first eene ship was eddmarie exactly because of Marie development.

I'm guilty of seeing May as the most innocent one (certainly thanks to that bit where she cries in Hanky Panky Hullabaloo) and the only Kanker I'm keen on shipping with an Ed (the Ed).

Bro? - well... He serves his purpose haha. And he's got an interesting aesthetic. I do like people being invested in the character and even liking him or imagining a more redemptive interpretation of him. Fans have been able to like much more monstrous characters in fiction, being a Bro fan is no big deal... "I can fix him" sure go ahead! You're a saint 🤣

[bluefurrsmemes]

A list of random Grey's Anatomy Quotes. Feel free to change pronouns if you need to.

"You do know what a human being is, don't you Evil Spawn?"

"I'm not evil. Unless evil turns you on."

"But, I mean, that's not a secret."

"You all knew who he was before you got involved with him."

"Woe is me, he doesn't call me back, he's dating other women."

"I'm sure that you would prefer your booty calls to be uncomplicated and void of feeling."

"I have feelings. I have a lot of them."

"So do it. Decide. Is this the life you want to live?"

"And I love you. I love you all the time. Every minute of every day. I love you."

"Should we? … I mean, there’s a discussion that we could have… if you wanted to have one?"

"Be better than anyone here, and don’t give a damn what anyone thinks."

"My child punches other children…… fantastic."

"You never think about anybody but your damn self."

"Hardly. The only people who don’t know NAME loves NAME are NAME and NAME."

"He's very dreamy, but he's not the sun. You are."

"She asked me to tell you... She wanted you to know... that if love were enough... that if love were enough, that she'd still be here with you."

"...Do you think I'm too confident?"

"It's like I was drowning and you saved me. That's all I know."

"That’s true! we have survived an unusual number of bad things!"

"I don't play favorites dear. Nepotism is for the weak."

"The automatic paper towel thingy won't recognize me as human."

"Have you tried telling NAME how you feel?"

"Yes! Just not out loud."

"I don't know what that means."

"But I do have some experience with losing people I love. And I say the right way to grieve ... is to however the hell you want." "This person is a whore, has always been a whore, and will probably always be a whore."

"And I want you with me. I love you, and I think you love me too. Do you?" "Yeah, NAME and my partner sometimes have sleepovers, in my bed, with me in it."

"Funny, isn’t it, the way memory works? The things you can’t quite remember, and the things you can never forget."

"You have a voice. So use it."

"Have you ever wanted something with your whole being but... there are so many obstacles it seems like you won't get it?"

"Life’s not supposed to be like this…it’s not supposed to be this hard."

"It wasn't 'cause I thought I'd be happy alone. It was because I thought if I loved someone and then it fell apart I might not make it."

"It's easier to be alone because what if you learn that you need love and then you don't have it?"

"And maybe that's okay. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to live in our dreams."

"I make no apologies for how I choose to repair what you broke."

"Crap, my dad's tatted up skank isn't the bitch. I am."

"You want to have kids?"

"Have you met me? No!"

"They would still be our roommate if you would just apologize."

"You don't get to call me a whore."

"So pick me, choose me."

"Did you get a cat?"

"Your heart lives in your vigina."

"What if I'm not cut out for this?"

"What if I make them worse?"

"Okay, what's wrong with you?"

"I hope you told him it's an insane idea."

"So who wants to step into the future with me."

"I am such an idiot."

"I am not ready to be anyone's husband."

"I know, I'm saying you could have a husband."

"This was supposed to be a good day."