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thejustmaiden · 5 years ago

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The Sesshomaru F*cks Debacle

Hey, fellow Inuyasha fans! How we feeling?? I imagine a lot of us are doing quite fabulously after the recent news we got about the sequel coming out this Fall, "Hanyou No Yashahime." So if it wasn't obvious already, I want to take the time to discuss the topic of- you guessed it- Sesshomaru. Go figure!

***THIS IS A REPOST OF MY ORIGINAL BLOG THAT DISAPPEARED FROM THE TAGS. PICS/GIFS HAVE BEEN REMOVED TO HOPEFULLY REPAIR THAT.***

Let's be real, as much as probably (and literally lol) all of us have viewed him as "daddy material" at some point or another during our teens, Sesshomaru being physically intimate with another being, much less a human, is difficult to conjure up in our minds. And there's nothing wrong with that, per se, as sex and romance doesn't come so easily to some as it does to others. Then again, that's not to say a romantic relationship is completely impossible or unattainable for him either.

I, for one, am not a huge fan of the idea of Sesshomaru siring children of his own. Granted, adopting/protecting children and other small companions is kinda his thing (I saw one user even describe him as a 'walking daycare' 🤣), and maybe it'll just take some getting used to, but all in all it's not entirely unfathomable to picture him having biological children. Though I'd be lying if I said I still didn't prefer he just took these two twin half-demon girls in and under his wing instead, like he did Rin. However, seeing as that's unlikely the case since the two girls resemble him in some fashion, the chances of that coming true are slim, which must mean that Sesshomaru did in fact bone some lucky lady. That's not to say I don't acknowledge that there's still a chance these kids aren't truly his but we'll see!

Which leads me to the real reason behind this blog! I'd like to address in-depth why I and so many other Inuyasha fans consider shipping S*ssrin as wrong and why it makes a lot of us extremely uncomfortable.

BUT FIRST BEFORE I FORGET, I want to give a little unofficial disclaimer by stating that this blog isn't intended to upset certain fans regarding my stance on the controversial ship. Thus I will not tag it under that ship name, and I suggest others who agree with me to do the same in any of their future posts.

Because let's not forget that the most important thing is that we're all fans here. We fell in love with this story and hold its beloved characters close to our hearts for a reason. And that still counts even if you're returning to this fandom a decade later. So please, let's try and remember that and be civil towards one another. Putting people down by attacking and insulting others in real life really doesn't make us any better than them. I REPEAT, please do not engage in this post unless you plan to be kind and respectful of others who may have a differing opinion than you. There's never a need to be ugly towards another human being. That goes for all shippers and fans of Sesshomaru in general. Thank you in advance for your understanding and compliance. 😊

Again, none of these comments are aimed at being inflammatory towards those fans who have a different approach to this pairing. If any of you are reading this now, please keep that in mind before deciding to participate in any discourse with me and other antis.

Okay, let me go ahead and list a few of the main arguments fans of this particular ship use to support them together. Then I'll give my reasons why those aren't enough to justify their relationship turning romantic:

1. Rin will be an adult before they get romantically involved

2. Sesshomaru didn't raise her and therefore isn't her father; he was never like a father to her in the first place

3. Sesshomaru hasn't been grooming her, not then and not now. Besides, it was Rin's choice first.

4. Age difference shouldn't matter when you look at other relationships in the series (InuKag, Koga x Ayame, etc.)

5. It was always going to be canon because the drama CDs exist

These are the main points I'm seeing around. Now let's dissect them, shall we? These are my direct responses- I'll try to keep them short and concise. Fyi: Jk! I'm lying, that never happens. 😆

1. Rin may be an adult, but from our standpoint that doesn't make much of a difference. It doesn't matter because it's all about how her relationship with Sesshomaru started off and how it continued onwards. From that moment, it was basically established from the get-go that their relationship resembles that of one a young girl shares with an older man who winds up becoming her guardian. She initiated it by trying to bring him food while he was injured, and he reciprocated by deciding to bring her back to life that fateful day.

Of course we're all happy that he did, because he's a better demon for it and a similar thing could be said about her! Therefore you must understand that fans against this pairing find it very hard to grasp the notion of a budding romance here when we look at their history. For us, it's synonymous to imagining a father eventually falling in love with his daughter or someone else who reminds him of a daughter, and vice versa. But let's just say he's not a father to her like many of you claim and more like, say a modern-day babysitter. Isn't it still bizarre to you that a young girl could fall in love with the man who looked after her and cared for her at that age, maybe even played games with? One day or on multiple occasions he even sees her naked because she had an accident and got hurt so she needed help changing or something. I admit it's more realistic that it was Jaken if anyone who'd be in charge of this, but why does it really matter who was tasked with what? Sesshomaru may have not been around all the time but that doesn't mean he's any less involved or invested in Rin's general care and well-being. So it's that thought alone that keeps many of us from even contemplating a romance forming between them. Whether he hardly interacted with her over the years or not is irrelevant, because it's clear to me that they have both formed a strong enough bond that constitutes calling them family. I highly doubt he ever even planned to keep Rin in his company as long as he did. But it happened, and whether you want to admit it or not, meeting her changed his life. Meaning Rin was never just some girl he traveled with or hardly knew. Despite his feigned indifference and stoic ways at times, I'm pretty sure we can all agree that Rin grew on him and was the first person to really influence him in a way that helped soften and open up that heart of his in a way nobody ever had before. One's significance to any given person isn't solely measured by the quantity of time spent alongside that person but by the quality of how that time was spent with said person. It's safe to say that in the case of Sesshomaru and Rin, they definitely fall under that category.

2. Fair if you don't view Sesshomaru as Rin's father, but you must acknowledge that he did fill some father figure-like role to her at the very least. Or let's just call him her vassal if you think that's a more accurate description. Also, can I just quickly stress again that it doesn't matter how long she spent by his side or whether she spent more time in the village or not, because he still ended up playing a major part in her childhood as an adult male role model. Regardless of the title you give him, it still stands that although he may not be her official adoptive father, he is LIKE A FATHER. There really is no point in denying that, because their dynamic exudes one of a father-daughter. I guarantee you that any outsider looking in would agree that if not her father then at the very least he embodies a male relative of some kind. Honestly, the details of their relationship dynamic specific to this show (regional/period differences, human vs. demon culture, etc.), don't really matter here. Why? Because one can assume that the general consensus here is that a large percentage of fans perceive their connection as a familial one. Yes, most would unanimously agree that Rin and Sesshomaru, along with Jaken and Ah-Un, are a FAMILY.

If she had first met him as an adult, then we'd possibly have a very different story here. The point of the matter is that he didn't, so that should be where this discussion ends. Unfortunately, for many, it's not. The bottom line is that a child he knew and cared for should never be someone he begins to view in a romantic light. I don't care how many years have passed (or that to demons years are like days or some less inconsequential length of time), and how much she's matured or how specific marriage customs were back then (if they're no longer appropriate now then why are we still condoning these backward practices?). Rin should NEVER have the desire to be sexually attracted to this father figure she's always looked to and trusted to protect her. Maybe it's vastly different from a demon's perspective (even though still unjustifiable in my opinion), but as a human, Rin's feelings towards Sesshomaru wouldn't and shouldn't suddenly change towards him and in such a drastic manner mind you. Yeah, maybe she used to have an innocent crush on him, but I'd like to think our smart and compassionate little Rin would learn that was simply because she was a child who didn't know any better. Besides, growing up with Kaede and around other humans I'd like to think she fell in love with another human sometime over the course of all those years. It only makes sense, right? Don't you think that's part of why Sesshomaru left her there in the first place? He wished for her to experience what it was like to live a normal human life, falling in love and marriage both being a key part of that. If I were Sesshomaru, I'd be deeply troubled if I started to develop feelings for a little girl I once protected and kept in my company for quite an extended period of time, which was at least a year from what I understand. (Pls correct me if I'm wrong because I gather it may have been longer.)

3. Apparently in the manga and the Final Act, we see Sesshomaru still visits the village to check on Rin from time to time. He even brings her gifts, such as beautiful and luxurious kimonos. I recently learned from another Tumblr post that kimonos are what older men gift in order to sort of earn their favor with these young ladies, AKA they're wooing them. If that is indeed true, then that would mean he's basically grooming her and has been for however long she's lived there in the village but potentially even longer. To put it nicely, he's courting her. If this was another young lady (maybe not an adult perhaps but still of marrying age) who he DIDN'T assist in raising, then I could possibly get on board with this.

The thing is, it's far from that with them two if you consider everything they've gone through and endured together! Because he not only met her as a young girl but he got to know her first as a young girl, and she became one of his traveling companions all while she was only a young girl!!! Their bond will always be defined by that time when she was just a young girl, and nothing can or should change that he will always see her in that same light. Kinda like how our parents or other family members from older generations tell us that they'll always see us as their babies. So the fact that her time spent with Sesshomaru is constantly compared to her time spent in the village shouldn't apply here. Don't we all know this already? That we can can come across someone in our lifetime and maybe the time with them is short-lived, but that doesn't make it any less significant or those people any less special. Sesshomaru made an impact on her as much as she did on him, that much we know is true. Sure, it was years ago, but that's not something you ever forget. Sometimes when you look at loved ones you haven't seen in a while, there are just certain memories you have of them from over the years that will come rushing back to you without fail and that you will always cherish no matter what. I'd like to believe that when Rin looks at Sesshomaru and he looks at her, that they can both look back fondly on their times traveling together. This explains why I'm really struggling here to picture how anyone could sleep with someone they used to treat as their guardian/father/ward/daughter/what have you. So someday and somehow, this person just stops viewing them that way, is that it? I mean, how does this work exactly? It's not like you can just flip off a switch and forget everything from your past with this person, ya know? Unless you have your memory wiped, what I'm understanding is that S*ssrin shippers approve of the idea of these two characters KNOWING that they are or used to be like practically FAMILY to each other, yet agree that these two characters in question still have the capacity not to mention desire to pursue HAVING SEX with each other anyway. Do I got that all right? Did I miss anything?

Originally I provided two examples of fan art I found to help put what I'm trying to say here into better perspective, but since they've been removed, just type in "Sesshomaru and Rin" on Google and you'll find plenty of examples of what I'm talking about here- and no, it's not S*ssrin images. I realize Sesshomaru has never been the touchy-feely sorta guy like it's depicted in some of the fan art, but that doesn't necessarily diminish the affection he feels and attachment he has towards Rin. He just has a different way of expressing his love is all, even if he doesn't outwardly show it. The real question here is, can you really look at sweet pictures of an adult comforting a child who's been under his care for a significant amount of time and then suddenly be like, "oh man, I can't wait till they bang!" I'm sorry, to each their own, but you gotta admit why we must find that creepy.

4. Regarding Inuyasha and Kagome's relationship, we need to remember that he didn't age after all those years stuck to that tree. And besides, demons age differently so this is a pretty unfair comparison. This isn't the best example, but think about how a cat's lifespan works. 10 years in (indoor) cat years is like 56 in human years. So technically in demon years, Inuyasha is physically and emotionally compatible with a human around Kagome's age. Hell, even though he's over a hundred years older, Kagome is still a whole lot more mature than he probably ever will be! 😂 (Psst! We still love you, Inuyasha! 💋)

Now as for Koga and Ayame, this also isn't comparable to Sesshomaru and Rin. Koga met Ayame one night, only not to see her ever again until she was older and of age. After rescuing her on that night when she was only a girl, he gives her a piggyback ride and you can tell he just wants to cheer her up when he mentions her being his wife someday. (And boy, did that work wonders on Ayame!) Then they gaze at this stunning lunar rainbow together, which I think is quite rare judging by looks of it. This is not an attempt to defend this proposal- if we can even really call it that- but all I'm saying is that I don't think even Koga knows what overcame him in that moment. Fast forward to present-day when they cross paths again, and Ayame still remembers his so-called promise, but guess who doesn't right away? Yep, our man Koga! It takes a quite a while for it to come back to him, too. This further proves my point that something beyond Koga and his power possessed him to say all those things to a little Ayame for some reason. Maybe you can call it destiny, or maybe it was some special kind of magic caused by the lunar rainbow, Idk! All I know is that they do end up together in the Final Act and that it wasn't until they met as two consenting wolf-demons that they really grew to know each other and coincidentally- or maybe not so coincidentally- fall in love.

5. From what I understand, it appears these drama CDs are some kind of satire which doesn't equate to canon. Perhaps Rumiko did not debunk them but she also didn't confirm they're true either. I'm hearing conflicting reports, however, and her involvement in them is questionable. Like her name is supposedly on the cover or something? But then I've also heard that she has spoken out against this ship. From the sounds of it, there is enough evidence- or lack thereof rather- to conclude that fans cannot use this as proof enough for their ship already being or soon-to-be canon.

Finally, I'd like to end on this note where I'll be addressing ethics in entertainment. When it comes to our choice of entertainment, there's always a level of escapism implied, sometimes so much that we project ourselves onto certain characters. Delving into a fantasy world like that of Inuyasha can really help some people better cope with real life problems, but it's all about striking the right balance, as each individual has different wants and needs. The thing is there's only so much escapism one can allow in a fictional world before basic morals from our own world begin to take precedence. I can always enjoy some good fantasy, but it's not long until I start to reflect on how I personally relate what entertainment I'm currently absorbed in to real life. It's inevitable really. For example, if certain relationships portrayed on screen conflict with strong opinions I've adopted on a sensitive topic, especially those that take children into account, then I feel it's my responsibility to speak out against any media that even remotely promotes it. Yes, even if it's just fiction. Because art imitates life, right? (And yes, sometimes the other way around.) So in other words, our stories should mirror our way of life to some degree. History has seen its fair share of ugly events and traditions we are surely ashamed of but that we've hopefully learned our lessons from. Most societies nowadays seriously frown upon or condemn stuff like pedophilia, child grooming, or anything of the sort. Of course it doesn't help that we see still see these kinds of issues glossed over so much that we've become desensitized to them in many respects.

The thing is we cannot allow this way too common older-man-dotes-on-young-girl trope (or anything resembling it) to continue to be glorified or romanticized. It matters not that feudal Japan was a drastically different time to be alive and that this was the norm back then, or even that this remains a popular ship in Japan. All it comes down to is if whether we would currently tolerate such acts and behaviors were we to witness them in real life. If your answer is 'no', then it should be 'no' in every respect. If you deem it acceptable just because it's fiction, then I'm sorry to say, but you're going to have to answer to a lot of people. No surprise there, that goes for all fandoms. I guarantee you it's not just the people who personally identify as victims who have serious qualms with this ship either, because you don't necessarily need to have bad experiences of your own in order sympathize and see where a lot of these people are coming from. And no, just because I'm unhappy with the possibility of S*ssrin going canon does not mean I'm whining or that I'm attempting to spread negativity about this series before it's even out. Remember, fans have the right to be critical of whatever content it is they're watching/reading, and if they demand something in the storytelling be represented better, then of course they can challenge that. After all, none of us should feel like "canceling" the content we love is our only hope to fixing a story. That's not how it ever should be. Fans are fed up, and can you really blame them? Nah, we can strive to do better in this area, plus it's not like there isn't always room for improvement. So let's please be more vigilant about how the content we consume translates to reality, in addition to being mindful of how it can directly correlate to real life problems for ourselves as well as others around us.

That's a wrap, y'all!! I hope you enjoyed what I had to offer on this topic, and here's hoping I actually contributed something new to this conversation! I'm aware that that's unlikely the case for us fans who've been living in this tag the past couple days (like me lol), but I'd like to believe I put my own spin on it and it was still worth your while. 😉

P.S. Overall, I remain optimistic about the new show! So are there any friendly Inuyasha group chats on Tumblr I can join? If so, please do invite me! I need to obsess about this sequel even more than I already am, EEEK!!!

#inuyasha #hanyo no yashahime #sesshomaru #anti sessrin

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kpoptart216 · 7 years ago

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The Arrangement (pt 6)

A/N: OKIE IM SUPER PROUD OF THIS PART JUST FYI SO PLS LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK THAT WOULD BE GREAT. Also, this was way too fluffy for me, so prepare for the angst in the future parts muwahah.

The next day, you woke up in a daze. You were kind of surprised when you woke up in a different room, but remembered exactly what happened and calmed down a little. You saw Jimin sleeping in a somewhat awkward position on the sofa. The blanket was slowly falling off of him, so you got up and placed the blanket higher up his body. He always seemed peaceful when he was asleep, you thought.

You realized it was pretty early in the morning, so you decided to make a nice breakfast. You showered real quick, silently admiring the size of the bathroom. You reached for your shampoo, which was placed neatly next to Jimin’s. It was weird seeing all your things next to his. But you were happy still to see this part of his life, no matter how small it might have been. Subconsciously you started to hum to a song, forgetting that your husband was still outside.

Jimin awoke the second you had fixed the blanket on him. You didn’t have to do it, but you still did, making him smile as you turned away. He was always a light sleeper and the couch didn’t exactly provide the best sleeping conditions either. Oh, how he missed his bed. Once he heard the shower turn on, he looked at the time and realized it was still quiet early in the morning. He didn’t know what to do. So, he chose to scroll through his phone. Then, he heard it.

He thought he was mistaken at first. He could hear a faint hum coming from the bathroom, and it was...heavenly. Usually, Jimin woke up in silence, got ready in silence, ate in silence, and left in silence. But his morning routine was now already filled with sweet sounds.

You quickly finished your shower, hoping that Jimin didn’t wake up anytime soon. You carelessly picked out a simple outfit to change into so that you could make breakfast and then get ready into your work clothes later. For such a smart woman, you were pretty dumb sometimes. Because today, you threw on whatever came to your hands first. You wore a black bra with a thin white shirt and some leggings. The shirt hung loose on your shoulders and the wetness from your hair didn’t help your situation either. Without even taking second glance at the mirror, you exited the bathroom, only to find Jimin staring right in your direction.

As soon as you exited, Jimin turned to face you, only to turn wide-eyed. You rarely ever wore comfortable clothing around him. Hell, the only comfortable clothing he ever saw you in was that small purple night dress you wore. But this, this was new. And he had to had force himself to look away, but the image was practically burned into his head. The leggings showcased your legs perfectly and the way the shirt hung on your shoulders didn’t leave much to the imagination. And the way you looked with messy wet hair, oh my. You jumped black slightly when you saw that Jimin was awake.

“Uh, I’ll go make some breakfast..” you said, awkwardly.

“Uhm.. ok. But uh..your shirt is kinda...kinda...” Jimin started as he pointed to your shirt.

You looked down and to your horror, you could see your bra almost perfectly through the shirt. “Oh my god!” you exclaimed as you hugged yourself. How embarrassing, you thought.

You ran back inside the room to change into something far thicker. Jimin just sat and laughed at your cute antics.

You came back out with a black shirt and tried to quickly leave the room before you died of embarrassment. Jimin took this has his chance to get ready. However to your surprise, you found Jimin’s parents awake and sitting in the living room, enjoying their morning cup of coffee.

“Good morning, sweetheart” said Jimin’s father.

“Appa! Amma! I didn’t think you both would be up so early! If I had known, I could have started on breakfast earlier” you said, slightly rushing to the kitchen.

“Don’t be silly dear. We are perfectly fine with our coffee for now and we don’t really eat much for breakfast anyways. Whatever you choose to make will be lovely I’m sure” said Jimin’s mom.

“It will be ready soon, I promise!” you said. Now you really wished you had changed into something a little nicer. At least now you knew to be prepared in the future.

Pretty soon, you had a small strew ready and the rice was almost finished cooking as well. You began making some eggs, something you noticed that Jimin had liked, and set the table.

“It smells delicious Y/N!” said Jimin’s father. “My mouth is already watering” he said with a hearty laugh.

“Thank you appa! It’s almost done, I promise” you said. And at that moment, Jimin came out, ready for the day.

“Ah, good morning amma. Good morning appa!” he said, as he gave them both a kiss on the cheeks.

“Ah son, good morning!” they both chimed. Jimin came into the kitchen, in full attire for work and it only made you want to get ready for work yourself.

“Everything smells delicious honey” he said. It felt so weird hearing the cute name come out of his mouth, but you smiled nonetheless. He reached behind you to grab a coffee mug and pour himself some coffee.

“Well, breakfast is ready!” you said, as Jimin sat at the table where his parents soon joined.

“Oh, you made Jimin’s favorite” Jimin’s mom said and though you didn’t know to what exactly she was referring to, you smiled. Jimin smiled too as he ate his favorite eggs.

After breakfast, the family had dispersed. Jimin’s parents had mentioned that they were going to go out and meet some friends and Jimin had left for work. You were left alone again, and you already missed having everyone around. So, you quickly got ready for work and left too.

The day was pretty long, and you had to finish a lot of work. However, you failed to see the time and you only realized when the sun was already setting and you office seemed to be getting darker as well.

You looked at the clock and it was already seven. “Oh shit! Dinner!” you said, as you hurriedly grabbed all your things and rushed home. However, when you got home, you already smelt something yummy.

“Hey honey. I realized you were getting late, so I got some takeout. It’s your favorite!” he said as he pointed to the table that was already set. You didn’t know what he had bought and he sure as hell didn’t know what your favorite was, but whatever he did buy, it smelled amazing.

“Awh, when did our son become so caring?” Jimin’s father joked.

“Anything for my wifey!” Jimin joked back. Well, it was more of a joke between you and Jimin because you two were the farthest thing from a married couple.

You all sat at the table, and you were really learning to love the experience. This time was filled with many childhood stories and laughter and you knew you were going to miss this when his parents left.

After dinner, Jimin’s mom helped you clean up and Jimin and his father decided to go on a small walk. And by the time you finished cleaning up and finally sat down, they had already returned.

“well that was a short walk!” you said.

“It was cold!” Jimin said while pouting, garnering a laugh from everyone.

“Well, we are pretty tired, so we’re going to bed. Do you guys have any plans for the weekend? We thought maybe we could all go on a picnic at one of our resorts a few hours from here! And Y/N, your parents too!” Jimin’s mom said.

“Oh, that sounds nice. What do you say, sweets?” You asked Jimin. You pondered on what to call your husband, but this just suddenly came out and so you decided to stick to it, realizing it was pretty easy to say.

“Yeah! Sounds good to me too” Jimin says. He too, was slightly surprised with your nickname for him, but he kind of liked it.

“Perfect then! We can leave tomorrow around 11? I’ve already talked to your parents Y/N, and they should be good too” Jimin’s mom said. “Good night kids” she said as they both walked back to their room.

You had decided to stay and finish up some work on your laptop in the living room as Jimin went back to the room. You figured he had slept, but when you finished your work an hour or so later and entered your room, you had found Jimin plopped up on the bed, watching TV.

“Oh, are you done? I can move” he said.

“No no, I still need to change and everything. Feel free to watch!” you said, smiling.

You took your time with you nighttime routine and eventually came back out. Jimin turned to your direction and reached for the remote to turn it off.

“Hey, if you want you can keep watching, It doesn’t bother me. The...beds pretty big anyways” you say. You were on one end of the bed while he was on the other and you could probably fit two or three people your size in between you both. “I’m just going to be reading anyways” you say, reaching for a book you honestly weren’t planning on reading before two seconds ago. You slowly laid down on your bed, pulling up the covers to keep you warm.

“Oh..thanks I guess” he says, turning back to the tv. “It looks like they had already made all the plans before they even asked us, huh?” Jimin said, facing you again with a small smile.

“Yeah, it seems like it” you said giggling “But it should be alright! I haven’t been to any of your resorts anyways” you say back. The Park family owned many, many things. They had invested money in pretty much all aspects you could think of and you could see their name almost everywhere in the country. Likewise, so had your family. Which is why when it was announced that the two you would wed, the media went crazy.

“It’s not anything extravagant. Not like your resorts or anything I bet” He said, still facing you.

“Oh, ours is not much either” you say, assuring him.

“Oh please, I’ve seen some of your buildings and they are absolutely stunning. don’t know how you make it affordable” he says.

“It’s all apart of the business plan” you say, smirking. It was true! When you had finally graduated college with your business degree and then got your MBA a year later, you had started working for the family business. One of the primary things you focused on were making your products and accommodations and such affordable for the general public. And for that, you were well received by both the media and the public.

“Yeah, I heard you had a lot to offer for your company” Jimin said truthfully. And it struck him then, that he might have actually liked you if he wasn’t forced to marry you. You were envied by women all around the country, and many considered you a celebrity almost. But Jimin didn’t like his lifestyle change, and he took that out on you. He felt bad now, but he was hoping that things would be somewhat better now.

“Like you. I’ve heard you’ve contributed many amazing ideas to the company, like the scholarship idea” you said. The park family started giving out scholarships to children who really needed it and for those who were exceptionally brilliant. You always loved that idea, especially knowing that kids were getting the education they wanted and thought they couldn’t afford. It gave them the chance to pursue their dreams.

“You knew about that?” Jimin asks, surprised. Not many people knew about it, and if anything, Jimin wanted to keep it on the down low.

“Yeah, your dad had told me about it a while ago. I always loved the idea” You said honestly.

“Wow, you really do talk to my parents a lot” he said while laughing.

“Hey, like I said, they’re great people, sweets” you joked.

“Thanks, honey, I couldn’t agree more” he joked back. You both looked at each other before starting to laugh simultaneously.

“We probably have a lot to talk about, huh?” You asked, out of the blue.

“Hhhm?” Jimin wondered out loud.

“I mean, we’ve been married for a few months now, but theres still so much I don’t know about you. Like I had no idea the eggs were your favorite. And whatever you bought for dinner isn’t exactly mine, but it was delicious nonetheless.” you said, honestly.

“You caught me there. I just got some chinese food from my favorite restaurant, but i’m glad you liked it” He said, smirking again.

“Oh you thought this was good? You have to try my place, it’s at least 10x better than this” you said.

“Oh please, nothing can beat this” he said, smiling back at you.

“I bet it is!” you said back. “And there’s this really nice dessert shop just a few minutes away and they sell the cutest things” you chimed, clearly excited about the sugar you were thinking about.

“Ok, I’ll have to try it to believe it, but I highly doubt it will beat this” he said, smiling. He found it cute how you suddenly smiled thinking about dessert. You were still somewhat childlike and yet you were so well put together that it almost confused him.

“oooh are you in for a treat!” You said.

“Yeah yeah, we’ll see. So chinese is your favorite food then?” he asked.

“Hhm, I don’t really know if I have a favorite. It’s more of what I’m in the mood for. Like one day i’ll be craving chinese and the next day will be italian or something” you say.

“Same here. I don’t think I could eat the same type of food all the time” he said.

“Well, what other types of food do you like? Maybe I can try cooking them at home” You said, smiling back. You honestly liked cooking as it calmed you down, and trying new recipes was fun as long as it wasn’t too tedious.

“Hhm, well I love meat. I like kimchi stew, and all kinds of street food. Hhm, I like fried rice” he says, as he seriously pondered about his favorite food.

“Hhm thats surprising. I thought you were going to say lobster or something” you said, giggling.

“Hey, I’m a korean by birth and by heart ok?” he said laughing. Both you and Jimin never realized it, but he had also slowly eased his way down and now he too was laying on the bed, facing you.

And just like that, the two of you had somehow started talking about your favorite foods and you ended up talking the entire night. You shared stories with each other from your childhood. You talked about your goals and dreams for the future, and just about everything and anything. Jimin learned a lot about you in this one night and though he first thought of it as a duty to get to know you, he was pleasantly surprised when he kept wanting to hear more. You had a rather interesting life, or at least you made it sound interesting. It was pretty similar to his, so he realized you two had way more than common than he had first thought. He found out about all your favorite things and your lifelong wish to adopt a puppy. And likewise, you learned many things about your husband as well. He told you about how his parents had adopted him after his birth parents died in an accident when he was a little boy. He even told you about last thing his parents had given him, a children’s storybook, which he had managed to lose somewhere and wanted another copy of, but he could never find a copy as it was no longer published and the copies still available were quite expensive.

You had started to tear up when he had told you the story, and it shocked Jimin. He no longer cried when he told the story, but maybe because he had never really told it to anyone anymore. Only his close friend really knew and he didn’t know why he felt so open enough to tell you. But when you had started to tear up, it warmed his heart knowing that you were genuinely listening to each word he was saying and you were feeling every emotion he was.

The TV was still running in the background, but neither of you paid attention to it. The lights were still on in the room, so you never really paid attention to the time either. But you found yourself yawning and Jimin noticed. “Wow, I wonder what time it is” he said, as he turned to the other side to reach for his phone.

“Omg Y/N, it’s already 4:30 in the morning” he said, surprised and trying to stifle a yawn. He turned to face you again when he didn’t hear a reply and he found you fast asleep, clinging on the book you had tried to read.

Jimin smiled at your sleeping figure and while he tried to take the book out of your strong grip, you instead grabbed at the side of his shirt, not willing to let go. Trying not to wake you up, he moved very slowly and placed the book on the nightstand to his side and turned out all the lights.

He was nervous with you so close to him, and he didn’t exactly plan on sleeping next to you, but he didn’t want to wake you up and he promised himself that he would be up before you and would move back to the couch before you knew.

The sunlight fluttered into the room slowly and you slowly turned. You knew that you had to open your arms and face the day, but you were too engulfed in the warmth that you wanted to stay in bed just a little longer. Since when was the bed this comfortable? Or warm? You felt some warm air brush the top of your head, and before you opened your eyes to try and find out what it was, you heard the sound a camera click.

You opened your eyes to find Jimin only a mere few centimeters away from your face and when he felt you stir in his arms, he too had awoken from his sleep. His eyes fluttered open and it took a few seconds for his eyes to adjust to the sunlight. He finally saw you staring wide eyed at him, and in his peripheral vision, he could see someone standing at the door. He turned to face the door with you still in his arms and you followed his gaze. And much to your horror, you found both his parents staring at you both lovingly. Jimin’s mother also held her phone in her hands, which you assumed was the sound of the camera.

“AMMA!” Jimin yelled, scaring you a little as you jumped in his arms. “What are you guys doing here?” Jimin asked. He still hadn’t let you go, and if anything he held you tighter in his shock.

“Well sorry son. It’s already 10:30 and we were going to leave at 11 remember? We tried calling for you both and we even knocked but no one answered and we were getting worried but we found you both sleeping so peacefully and wow your mom just had to take a picture” she said, as if it was no big deal.

“Wait, it’s already 10:30? Oh my goodness, I’m so sorry amma, appa, I’ll make a quick breakfast and we can leave soon. I’ll call my parents too” you said, finally pulling away from Jimin’s hold. You immediately felt colder and regretted leaving, but you had no time.

“It’s fine dear. I made us a simple breakfast while waiting and I already called your parents too. It’s fine if we’re late. Take your time getting ready you both” she said and both her and Jimin’s father sauntered out of your now shared bedroom.

“Jimin I’m so sorry” You started, not really knowing what you say.

“No no it’s totally fine, we both stayed up really late. And like my mom said, it’s fine if we’re late. I’m sorry for sleeping here on the bed...” he said, running his hands through his bed head which you found incredibly adorable.

“Oh about that. If your parents might come back in here one night, maybe it’s best that you continue sleeping on the bed. Afterall it’s big enough” you said. You couldn’t risk having his parents walking in and finding you both sleeping separately.

“A bed so big and we still ended up as close as we did” Jimin joked and immediately regretted the words that came out of his mouth. He meant it as a joke and didn’t think before he talked, but he blushed at his own words and found you blushing too.

“Uhh, I’ll go get ready” you said, running into the bathroom.

Both you and Jimin got ready as you quickly as you could and ate a quick bite before heading out with his parents. Your parents had agreed to meet you there and while driving to the resort, you had a smile on your face the entire time. You were excited to see your parents afterall.

Jimin turned to look at you a few times as he drove and he was surprised that the smile never left your face. He found himself smiling too. Meanwhile, his parents in the back seats were watching you both and though it silent in the car for most of the ride, it was a comfortable silence as everyone enjoyed as the view changed from the cityscape to the beautiful beaches.

You eventually met up with your parents and had a wonderful lunch on this hill facing the mountain with the resort right in the back. You all shared more stories together and for whatever reason, Jimin didn’t leave your side.

He enjoyed listening to the stories your parents told about you and your childhood and he realized you had left out most of your embarrassing childhood stories last night. But he could recognize a few stories and he smiled along, happy that he had actually heard it before.

You smacked your dad’s lap playfully when he continued with the embarrassing stories, but Jimin interjected “Hey let him finish! You never tell me all the embarrassing stories, so this is a treat!” he said.

“I don’t tell you for that reason, sweets!” you pouted and Jimin couldn’t help but laugh as he pulled you into a small hug. The skinship shocked you for a second but you quickly relaxed into his arms. You missed his warmth.

After some time, the parents began to converse amongst themselves and you and Jimin just watched as the conversation unfolded. Jimin nudged your side “Want to go on a walk? I can show you a bit more of the resort?” he asked.

The parents had stopped conversing for a second, only to say “That’s a wonderful idea, Jimin. Go take some private time for yourselves”

Jimin stood up and gave you his hand to help you stand up. You figured he would let go after, but instead he intertwined his fingers with yours and pulled you along to the small path on the hill.

You didn’t pull your hands away, figuring it was only till your parents couldn’t see anymore, but to your surprise, he didn’t pull away even when they were out of sight.

“Hey Y/N?” he started. “I was thinking...”

“Yeah?” you said, looking at him. By this time, the sun was beginning to set and as Jimin turned to you, he swore you never looked more beautiful. You dress flowed along with the breeze, and night was slowly getting colder, but just in that moment, with the perfect lighting, he swore you were perhaps the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. And in that second, his father’s words rang in his ears. You got lucky with her.

“I know, we didn’t start off on the right foot when we got married, and I really regret not having the chance to get you know earlier” he said.

“Ohh..Well, I feel the same way. I wish we gave each other a chance” you said, honestly.

“Well, you did. You tried to get along as far as I can remember. You tried to make small talk and I would just shut you out and that wasn’t fair. I just want you to know that I didn’t hate you. Rather, I was just hating the situation I was thrown in. I hope you can forgive me” he said honestly. At some point, he had started to rub small circles on your hand and you loved the sensation. You had gripped his hand slightly harder.

“No, I’m sorry too okay? I stopped trying at some point as well. And I can’t say that I was too happy with the situation either, but I’m glad we’re at least talking now” you said back. You swore you could have started crying by how happy you were in this moment. It’s not like he was professing his love for you or anything, but just the chance that you could have a friendly relationship with him made you happy.

“I am too” he said, smiling back at you. “I was thinking that...that maybe...maybe even after my parents leave...we could give this a try” he said as he pointed between you and him with his free hand.

“What do you mean?” you said as your heart raced. You had a hunch of where he was going, but you needed to know for sure.

“I mean...why don’t we give us a try? Give this marriage a try? I know we’re both in it to keep our parents happy but... maybe we can find happiness somewhere along the line too” he said as he looked intently at you.

“I...would love that...sweets” you said back. You heart was racing a million miles per second and you didn’t know how you had it in you to try and lighten up the mood at the second but you were glad you did.

“Thanks...wifey” Jimin said with a hearty laughter.

A/N: YO ITS NOT OVER YET. I REPEAT,

I A M N O T D O N E.

hope y’all liked this part, because i actually for once did. Also this was hella long, sorry not sorry.

Previous Parts: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

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viralhottopics · 8 years ago

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25 Men And Women Confess To The Darkest, Most Absurd Secrets Theyve Never Told Anyone Before

1.Identity Swapping Twins

“My grandfather had an identical twin brother. shall refer to grandfather as A and twin as B. Brother A got drafted into WWII, brother B didn’t so he pretended to be A to take A’s better job. Brother A returns from war and brother B’s still pretending to be him, even got promoted a few times. Brother A says, thats cool I’ll be brother C from now on (changed his name). This has gone on for over 50 years, never legally changed it or anything, just gave his identity to his bro and created a new one.”

2. Wasted…Too Wasted

“I once paid for a blowjob from a woman that was probably older than my grandmother. I was so wasted but I remembered everything. I quit drinking for a while after that.”

3. RIP Dennis

“Friend’s toilet doesn’t flush, I poop in trash can. Huge poop. Biggest poop I’ve ever taken. Friend’s family find massive poop in trash can and think that one of them threw out some dog poop, but due to the sheer size they figure that something is wrong with one of their dogs. A few weeks after taking their dogs to the vet, they find out their Yorkie has stomach cancer. Dog dies shortly after, incredibly large poop was seen as a result of the dogs cancer when in reality I pooped in their trash can. They still tell stories of the Yorkie’s poop that was about 3/4 it’s size.

RIP Dennis. You will be missed.”

4. No One Knows The Truth

“I was getting into a car once and somehow managed to slam my eye into the corner of the door.. got a giant black eye from it. Told everyone I got into a fight. No one but me knows the truth.”

5. Doing The Right Thing For Selfish Reasons

“When I was 15, I had my first girlfriend. She was the little sister of one of my very protective best friends, so right off the bat things were a bit sticky. She was a little off and after quite some time of prying she told me in confidence that when she was younger, her uncle abused her. She didn’t want to tell anyone because she figured it would destroy the family. Jump forward six months, and we break up over unrelated matters. The brother(my best friend) called me to a park to talk about it. I was pretty nervous that our friendship would end and the conversation when I got there was leaning towards that. Petty, but we were 15.

In a kind of last ditch effort, I told him about her uncle and what she told me. The conversation was then completely off me and the break up and onto her uncle. We sat there for a long time and I held him as he cried. The fallout from it was massive; the uncle was outed, his wife divorced him, he lost his job, etc. There was major rifts and divides across the entire family that lasted for a very long time. Their family has basically never been the same because of it.

I know what I did was right, because people like her uncle can’t be trusted and the truth should always come out. But in complete honesty, at the time I told my best friend about the uncle I wasn’t thinking about any of that. I was simply trying to distract my friend and take the guilt off me. I’ve never told anyone that and it kind of feels good to let it out. I wasn’t any social justice warrior or even a hero for outing a bad guy, I was just a kid who was nervous.”

6. I Was A Teenage Prostitute

“I made a lot of money working as a prostitute from the age of 19-22.

I stopped because the lifestyle I was living was killing me, I was doing a lot of heroin, I was surrounding myself with really dangerous people who did some really shitty things to me, and I really wanted to kill myself.

I somehow found myself lucky enough to get out and into a new city, and I got help in getting clean. I now work a regular job at a nice coffee shop, I have friends I very much love and are a positive influence on my life.

I’ve told my closest friends, but it obviously isn’t something you go around advertising.”

7. I Don’t Remember It But I’m Pretty Sure He Does

“NSFW response just FYI since I see this thread isn’t tagged. Using a throwaway because i want to get it off my chest, but, you know.

When I was 11 my older brother raped me a number of times(for the record i am male). It was kinda weird in that I literally had no idea what I was doing and don’t even have traumatic memories. It’s just kinda something that I know happened. I didn’t even connect the dots until I was 14, and I didn’t feel that bad about it then.

Honestly, the event probably impacts me more than I give it credit for and I think if I really wanted to just correlate things i would relate a decline in self-valuation to this event. I’m pretty sure my older brother remembers it, he is only 14 months older than me, but I give him the benefit of the doubt. I am pretty sure he didn’t really know what he was doing (I was homeschooled from 6th grade onward so sex ed didn’t exist), and am absolutely certain he regrets it.”

8. Saving Money

“To save up money to move out, I sell nudes.

Some guys want really specific things (leather suits, feet in a certain angle) so it’s easier to ask what they want than trying to find it online. Usually $5-$15 for a few pics and depending on what they want me to do.”

9. A Guilty Pleasure

“I think ‘Total Eclipse of the Heart’ is one of the greatest songs in history, and when alone in my car, and no other cars are nearby, I try to hit all the notes.”

10. Testicular Torsion Is A Real Thing

“I only have one testicle. The other one was removed when I was in middle school due to Testicular Torsion (where the testicles twist upon themselves) cutting off the blood supply to that area.

Unfortunately for me, I didn’t get to the ER until several hours later, after 1) going to the normal doctor to see what was wrong, and having to wait a long time in line, 2) the doctor saying I needed to get to the ER ASAP, but when I did the doctors there had apparently mixed up my case with someone else’s (not as urgent) case, so I was waiting in the ER for longer than I should have. And then 3) when I finally got to see a doctor, they had to call a second doctor before I could undergo surgery due to my insurance needing a second opinion. With all of those delays they were only able to save one testicle, while the other one had to be removed.

With that being said, if you have a son who is at the late elementary/early middle school age and they suddenly feel an intense pain in their private area for no apparent reason, please get them to the Emergency Room ASAP.”

11. Laughing Along

“I enjoy getting fucked in the ass with a strapon. I’m a pretty normal guy otherwise, but it’s a bit funny to hear people occasionally crack jokes about the subject and I have to laugh along.”

12. The Samaritan’s Dilemma

“I once talked a dude I had never met out of suicide via a phone call.

Two years later the same dude develops a habit of harassing girls to the point they themselves start feeling suicidal. First time I hear of this I tell him to stop, second time I cut all communication with him.

Third time I outright told him I wished I never saved him, and then snuck to his house and left a bottle of bleach at his doorstep.

The dude is still alive. And I still say that saving him was a mistake.”

13. Couldn’t Hold It

“Pissed on the floor at work because I couldn’t make it to the restroom. I was closing and wanted to get out of there ASAP… misjudged how long I could hold it. Didn’t want to piss pants. Was mopping at the time. Convenient.

I am also female, so it was definitely a commitment (i.e. exposing buttocks).”

14. Dumb Kids Who nearly Died

“When we were seniors, Cody & I were just getting drunk and being dumb kids. He drove us to a friends apartment where I don’t even remember leaving, and went back to my house. I remember trying to convince him to stay the night, but he drove home. This was at 1am. I woke up to him screaming at me at 4am about how he crashed his truck. I live at home.

My Dad walked out because he was getting ready for work, and took Cody home. Cody had wrapped his truck around a pole, and managed to not only walk away but he fucking ran to my house. I saw the truck, I would have been killed had I been in it. Cody’s Dad took the damage for the truck, and my Dad never said anything about it. Cody stopped drinking after that. He’s still my best friend, but being dumb kids almost killed us.”

15. Visited An Escort At Nineteen

“I got an escort once when I was 19.

She was a psych student at the same university and graduated from high school a couple years before me. We had a strangely normal conversation lol, like you would with a barista.

Anyway she wrapped my tool, started jerking me off and I said something like, ‘Oh man I wanna be inside you let’s get this ball rolling!’

And she was like, ‘Sorry honey, I’m not full service.’

So I was like, ‘What’s that mean?’

She explained that it means I’m basically just gonna get a handjob.

She was tugging for like 15 minutes and getting a little annoyed like, ‘Are you close to finishing?’

I had to be like, ‘No offense, but I’m not a virgin or anything like that. I’m at a point in my life where it’s hard to get off to a hand job through a condom.’ She was like, ‘Well you’re gonna have to’ and went back at it. I finally busted like 20 minutes later, my dick was completely red and swollen from the whole thing lol

As I was getting dressed I was like, ‘Hey I’m not mad or anything. I totally understand it’s part of the hustle, but I’m not thrilled at forking out 120 bucks for a handjob. Could you school me on how to get more for my buck if I get an escort in the future?’

She happily explained to me all the lingo, what to ask for upfront what not to say on the phone etc etc.

I thanked her and as I left she was like, ‘What’s your deal dude? You’re not like a typical client, you look good in your little baseball cap and your stylish jeans. You aren’t a virgin, I don’t often get young guys like you.’ I told her I was just out of a bad breakup and had some xmas money from my grandma to burn.

She ended up just complimenting me and encouraging me to just get out and try to date instead of spending grandma’s money on pussy.

The confidence boost was better than the blowjob. Total sweetie, I saw her on campus once but out of politeness/discretion didn’t acknowledge her.

Was a very surreal experience.”

16. Hooks Up With Boss On A Business Trip

“This is a long story. I went on a business trip with a group from work. The day we left I found out that my husband was sleeping with my brother’s wife. Of course the alcohol flowed and the owner of the company began hitting on me. My roommate went to the room early and I stayed out with a bunch of coworkers and the owner at a bar. He began texting me saying that he would walk to his room, I would walk to mine and then he would come over to mine later so no one would know. He gets there and things get heated, we are going full force when my coworker roommate starts screaming at me to shut the fuck up. She gets upset and runs out, gets in her car and goes all the way back home. It was dark and she didn’t see who the man was. We get back to work and she tells everyone that I was fucking a random and she felt unsafe. So my boss(not the owner) decides that he’s going to suspend me for putting myself and my roommate in danger. I’m not telling anyone that it was actually the owner so I was suspended without pay for a week. The owner paid me my weeks wages plus some secretly. He’s 20 years older than me and married:( I left that job because of it.”

17. Burying Doctor Manhattan

“My best friend, lets call him Doctor Manhattan, hung himself two years ago. He was an ex-African refugee from the war in Rwanda, with a very promising career in physics. He actually had an offer to work at the LHC, and he looked very much forward to it that is, until he committed suicide, of course.

It took all of us by surprise. He has always been a very dark individual, and not only by the color of his skin : he definitely had the most fucked up sense of humor Ive ever seen. Were talking about disguising himself as a plantation slave for Halloween, or pretending to be named Kunta Kinte when a stranger asked his name.

Anyway.

Since he died in the middle of Winter, and that I live in a country where it is impossible to bury the dead in the frozen ground, we had to wait until Summer to actually bury him.

That very day, unfortunately, I had to work extra for some bullshit reason. Immediately after my shift, I ran to the cemetery as fast as I could. It was not really far from there, but still ; I did not want to miss that.

Halfway there, I suddenly heard bells ringing, and singing. I knew too well what that meant.

I missed it. It was too late.

As I came upon the cemetery upon the hill, nobody was left there.

Well, almost nobody.

Manhattan only had two white friends in the city ; me, and Green Lantern. And Green Lantern was next to the coffin, crying.

I went up to him, and asked him what was wrong.

GreenLantern : Manhattan’s dead, you fucking retard.

Me: Yeah, but hes been that way for months. Whats wrong?

He looked at me, with tears in his eyes. After a long moment of silence, he finally uttered the right words.

GreenLantern : I cant get over it, .

Me: Well, so cant I, and I missed the fucking ceremony.

GreenLantern : Fuck, .

The heaviest silence fell upon the cemetary, with our dead superhero buddy next to us. Almost as if he wasn’t the most silent one out there. When I had an idea.

Me: Lets fucking bury him.*

Green Lantern stopped crying.

What the fuck are you talking about? he said in amidst of a chuckle.

Me: Lets bury Manhattan. He would have loved it. Come on man.

GreenLantern : Oh, thats so fucked up.

Me: Yeah, but he was.

GreenLantern : Youre right.

So thats how me and my buddy ended up shoveling dirt with our barehands upon the coffin of our dead friend, grieving in about 15 minutes.”

18. Craigslist and His Best Friend’s Dad

“I posted an ad on craigslist looking to give some oral services to ‘Dl/Married Men’ after talking to one of the guys who answered my ad, he seemed sane so I gave him the address to my apartment. Turns out when I opened the door, it was my best friend’s dad. We both acknowledged this event. I still went to town on him. My best friend is the oldest of 3 boys and the family is “Happily Married” fuck. I am scum.”

19. “Female Badass”

“I have the image that I’m a ‘female badass’ when I show everyone how proud I am that I’m single and that I don’t ever want to get married and have kids. Deep down, I would love to have a wedding and start a family. I just know that no one will be able to deal with me. I was in a physically and verbally abusive relationship, and I wake up screaming from my nightmares in the middle of the night. I don’t trust anyone, and I know that others would rather find someone else. But I’m going to keep letting others think that I’m happy being single.”

20. This Guy Will Steal Your Girl

“My brother was trying to get with this girl. But for some reason her and I hit it off one night when he wasn’t around. We just got along really well, it was very natural. I never intended on stealing her from him because I was seeing another girl. Eventually my brother started dating her but she abruptly broke up with him about two months later because I knew she couldn’t stand being around me all the time when I was the one she liked.”

21. Lied About The Abortion

“A three month fling and I had a pregnancy scare after he ended things with me, citing that he ‘wasn’t ready for a relationship’. He had spent a week trying to convince me to have an abortion, even before I found out there was no baby to abort. A few weeks later, I found out he was in a relationship with someone else, whose Facebook profile picture looked like it was taken on his couch and posted at a time when he and I were still together. Being the unstable and jilted person I was years ago, I convinced him I had lied about not being pregnant and actually had an abortion. He and the girl broke up a few days later.”

22. Burying the Hatchet

“So I was 17, horny as can be. I like butt stuff…like a lot. I wasn’t 18 so I couldn’t buy a dildo (when I turned 18 I used my bday money to buy one…another slightly sad thought). I was jonesing for something in my butt. I had tried a sharpie, a few fingers, there were sadly no cucumbers or anything similar nearby either. Then, a thought comes to me as I scan my room. My eyes meet my Great-grandfathers hand carved axe. The handle is shaped rather penis like, the end is like a dick-head, and almost a foot long! It has a carving on it of my Great grandfathers initials. I’m thinking…owch. It’s remarkably smooth, I wouldn’t get a splinter even if I tried, but the intials look rough on the ass. I shuffle for the free condoms I got handed to me at a recent festival I went to. This should make it a little smoother, right? I lube it up with Vaseline after covering it with a condom, and take it to pound town on myself. It was pretty nice, 10/10. Now I have it sitting in my room, 4 years later. It’s mine now since my grandfather passed and every time I see it I think of the night my 100 year old family heirloom pounded my ass as I busted the greatest nut my pure gay teen heart had known thus far.”

23. Trophy Wife

“I went to a rock concert with my uncle and his son. My uncle convinced me that the only way I would get in is if I pretended to be his wife, I had to wear a wedding ring.

My uncle was in his mid 40’s and I was 16. I didn’t understand why I had to be his wife but I went along with it cause I really wanted to see this band.

My uncle didn’t really pull any moves but he saw a couple of his old college friends and actually introduced me as his wife. He was still married to his actual wife. The weirdest part was my cousin, his son, was two months older than me.

Now that I’m older I kinda realized that my uncle played me because he wanted to have some young, hot trophy wife to show off to his friends. Kinda embarrassed I never realized that until two years later. Borderline incest, however he isn’t my blood-relative. His actual wife is my blood-relative.”

24. Holding It

“Ok. I can’t believe I’m actually about to type this because it’s so insanely embarrassing. In high school I did competitive speech competitions. When I was a junior, I finally made it to state for monologue. I only found out that I had made it to state the Monday before the competition because I was first alternate which meant if one of the competitions couldn’t make the competition then I would get to go to state. Since I found out so late notice, it was only my theater teacher and I at the competition and she had to go judge other rounds. The competition was at University of Oklahoma. So I was this little high school girl all alone on this gigantic college campus. I was terrified.

The way the competition went was that you had to perform three rounds over the course of two days and they would take your scores from all three rounds. It was the last round of the first day and I had to pee so bad. We were sitting there waiting for the third judge to come in so we could start. The judge was about thirty minutes late. I was sitting there having to pee and terrified that if I got up to go, the judge would come in and they would start without me. Right as I was about to muster the courage to get up and go use the restroom, the third judge walks in and they start the round. I performed second but there were still four performing after me (each performance was about 6 minutes long). Finally the last person gets up to perform and I’m freaking out in my head cause I can’t wait to get up and pee. The guy that was performing was insanely hilarious. I don’t remember what he said, but at one point he made me laugh so hard that I literally pees my pants. Not just a little pee, I let it all out. I remember looking around the room to see if anyone noticed. They didn’t. Somehow when the round was over, I managed to get up and throw my jacket around my waist and rush out before anyone noticed what I did.

I was so embarrassed. I always wondered if anyone ever noticed when they went to clean the room. The next year when we went to state, my teacher said there was a new rule that before any of the competitors left the room, the judges had to check it was clean because someone the year before peed all over the floor. When my teacher told us that, my whole class cracked up laughing at how ridiculous you would have to be to pee all over the floor. They had no clue it was me.”

25. The Fake Boyfriend Becomes Real

“I pretended to have a long distance boyfriend for 3 years when I was 13, until 16. Everyone else had boyfriends, and I got asked out only by weirdoes. I picked a good name and a good school for him, created lots of memories. I lived in a high school dorm during two years of this fake relationship, and every night I pretended to talk with him on the phone. I was pretty good at lying too. I even cheated on this fake boyfriend with a really great guy, and told the real one I felt guilty and broke up with him. I was fucked up, and I hated myself, but continued it anyway.”