#like yes my mind is always half somewhere else at any given time

[misc-obeyme]

akwkdjfwjdjf dont mind me in a puddle because that's so sweet that you enjoy my updates ??? 😭😭😭 I didn't think I'd go this far with the coffeeshop au and i have so many ideas bouncing around in my head and they're not even together yet but

WAHHH i feel like I'd never have gotten even CLOSE to writing anything again without your encouragement so i just wanna say thank you 🥹🥹 akwjdj

I'm about to actually try writing that song fic for solomams, EVEN BROUGHT THE WIRELESS KEYBOARD AND EVERYTHING BC I'M STAYING SOMEWHERE OVERNIGHT

also i was reading through my notes (i love that i keep saying my notes, it's so amusing, but i have a notes app AND pages in my sketchbook - anyway), and i think the concert scene might make more sense chronologically? mayhaps? *squints* it would also mean we get to meet beel and belphie for a second

that one is definitely more drama/emotional vibes. and when i say drama, i mostly mean you wanna bonk one of the three on the head because they're going through it trying to realize their feelings (mainly me </3. nothing like oddly specific lyrics to make you realize your crushes !! but playlist drama there's a note that says 'mammon has a breakdown he reschedules for later' is all I'll say bc it's funny how he short circuits over things. He can't be overthinking what was just said, he's got orders to make!)

im gonna do what i always do and daydream about it until it all connects in my head. spiderweb plot at it's finest !! OKAY GOODNIGHT

- ✨ anon

I've said it before, I'll say it again, I must know how this story ends!! LOL. I'm thoroughly enjoying it, so keep 'em comin'!

Oh wow!! Well, I'm always always going to encourage you to write! I honestly really enjoy what you send me and I think anything you create will turn out great!

Woo solomams!! I hope you enjoy the writing process!!

Ah yes sometimes events need to be shuffled around for the sake of the story! You can always change it back if you decide you don't like where it is! My writing program is set up so that I can write each scene in a new "document" and then just drag them around when I want them to take place in a different part of the story. So sometimes stuff is out of order for a bit lol!

LOL Mammon rescheduling the breakdown for later is excellent, I know exactly what that feels like. It's always okay, I know I'm buzzing about something under everything else but I don't have time to freak out about that right now because there are twenty other things I gotta take care of! Anyway, a little drama is always good! Shakes things up!

Honestly, I do that, too! When it comes to longer stories, I spend a decent chunk of time just daydreaming/thinking about it while I go about my regular days. And then eventually it just works itself out! It's one of the best parts of writing imo lol.

[polarisjisung]

MAKEUP, MAKE OUT

synopsis: somewhere between testing eyeshadow palettes and mascara wands, renjun tests the prospect of loving you

wc: 1k

pairings: best friend!renjun × fem!reader

genre: fluff

warnings: none (I hope)

notes: not proofread so there's bound to be some typos

As renjun finds you positioned between his legs, tapping a light brown shade of shimmer over his eyelids, he can't help but wonder how he'd explain the situation should anybody walk in.

How could he explain the fact that his best friend was quite literally seated on his bed straddling him, so close that from any other perspective you'd look at least half way into a heated makeout session, perhaps something more.

Your hot breath fanning his neck, and his own two eyes helplessly trailing over your soft features, he couldn't bring himself to look away. Each and every time he'd find his gaze falling upon your lips, a deep shade of pink. He wanted to kiss you, he realises.

Best friends didn't do that.

Renjun wonders why the thought even comes into mind or why today was the day, despite your countless other attempts at getting him to agree to let you do his makeup, that he'd said yes.

Though he doesn't have to search particularly far for the answer when you tell him to keep still for the nth time

"stay still jun, ugh, nana would've been a much more compliant client"

Renjun could barely stand the thought of you looking jaemin's way, let alone being half as close as you were with him right now, with those long lashes of na jaemin's, that girls would always fawn over, fluttering so prettily in front of you.

"nana huh" he scoffs, great, you're on a nickname basis now

"so moody" you roll your eyes, somehow still smiling down at the boy who wore a frown on his lips, "you're lucky you look pretty" you laugh.

Your laugh is loud, not in an obnoxious sort of way, but in an unapologetically you sort of way, that renjun loved to hear, knowing you opted for softer, quieter and nowhere near as genuine laughs in public. Some part of him glad that this was a laugh only reserved for him.

"you're saying I need makeup to look pretty?" renjun wonders if you can notice the pink creeping up across his face and spreading over his cheeks, hoping you'd think it was simply the blush you had applied a little earlier.

"of course not, I think you're the prettiest right when you wake up" you don't mean to let it slip, a small piece of information you would've liked to think he could have lived without knowing, softly patting the powder against his skin.

"well I think you're pretty all the time" his lips turn upwards slightly, his hands finding your waist "my pretty girl"

you barely seem to notice as he whispers under his breath, too focused on deciding which lips colour would suit him best, the slight crinkle of your brows no less than adorable

Like every best friend had, he'd thought of the possibility of more, with great consideration.

He'd thought about how walking around with your fingers intertwined rather than an arm lazily thrown over your shoulder might've felt, how introducing you as his girlfriend instead of a girl friend could make his heart leap out of his chest and perhaps most importantly how the thought of seeing you with someone else had him balling up his fists and grinding his own teeth against each other.

He knew he liked you, it hadn't been hard to admit to himself, but somehow it didn't seem so easy with you.

"renjun?" you call for the nth time, "which one do you think is better?" you alternate between the two tubes of liquid lipstick, "one or two?" but yet again, renjun seems to be in his own world, eyes glued onto you and yet somehow he's not listening to you at all.

"jun, you're staring" you wave an arm in front of him

he wonders where he'd given up trying to hide how he felt for you, a lazy smirk lining his lips,

"I am" this time, pulling you closer by the belt loops of your jeans, so your chest is flush against his "my pretty girl"

you hum, reaching for a soft brown lip liner

"what are we?" he asks before you can connect the pencil to his lips, shiny eyes causing your breath to catch in your throat

"best friends"

and for the first time ever, renjun finds himself absolutely loathing the confident tone of your voice. How after all these intimate moments, and far too many not so best friend like thoughts did you not see a thing

"have you ever thought about more?" you're scared to nod, but your head moves faster than you can let out the word no and suddenly it seems honesty is the best policy

"I don't think we've been just best friends for a while now" renjun smiles as the words fall from your lips, music to his ears

"then let me ask you again, what are we?"

"you know what we are jun" your voice is softer than before, an airiness to it that renjun finds himself basking in the warmth of.

"I want— no I need you to say it" his voice has reduced to whispers now, lips centimetres apart

"what if I showed you instead"

his thumb traced over you bottom lip, a soft "okay" muttered under his breath as his hands reached up to cup your face, your lips pressed against his in an instant.

he smiles against your lips, another kiss pressed to your lips before he forces himself back.

"you have no idea how much I've been waiting for this moment" he begins to pepper soft kisses across your face, finally leaning in again, this time taking your bottom lip between his teeth.

You wouldn't dare let him pull away, your breaths deep and rushed as you find your fingers tangled in his soft brown hair, strawberry lips perfectly locked with your own.

but when you do take a moment to breathe, your eyes land on a starry-eyed huang renjun staring up at you, looking like the prettiest mess you'd ever seen.

[mamoonde]

i really really really love the idea of wei wuxian revolutionizing modern cultivation over breakfast and conceptualizing these different theories simultaneously because the adhd brain has no brakes and the only reason it took him a decade to publish all these ideas was because he could not stick to a single train of thought long enough to finish (verbalizing) it, let alone put it down on paper coherently.

the only reason he even got to publishing them eventually (and enrolling to cultivation theory grad program to get on that track) was because one morning, his undergrad thesis advisor, lan qiren, finally got fed up and sat him down for an early morning progress check-in because it was midterm season and wei wuxian still hadn't decided on a topic.

wei wuxian, fueled by an unhealthy amount of redbull and three all-nighters, finally word vomits all his 'convoluted' ideas which he'd thought were uselessly obvious and redundant (because he's gone over these like a bajillion times, it's very plain-as-day to him, so he probably just hasn't read the articles that say these exact things).

lan qiren, teacup frozen halfway to his mouth: ...first of all, i only understood half of how you got to these conclusions, which only means they are indeed too convoluted and will need to be pared down; secondly: you have never mentioned any of these ideas before. why.

wei wuxian: oh. haven't i? oh well, i just thought, xyz, because, obviously, abcde. which is really what the 2 centuries old law on ghjkl was alluding to, right? and so, logically, xyz.

lan qiren: [mind blown, screaming, good gods this is the same child who's always tardy and spent freshman year pulling on the metaphorical pigtails of my straight-laced nephew?!?!??!??!?!] ..again, why...how have you never even spoken or submitted these ideas?

wei wuxian: because!!! they're so obvious!! surely, it's been published somewhere already? i can't be the only one to connect these dots, surely??

lan qiren: incredibly, you are. no one else has even thought to question tradition nor pursued more thoughts on the law of ghjkl, with half as much...sound arguments as you seem to have. in the past century, the focus of modern cultivation has tended towards practical uses and tools, some fine-tuning, perhaps. not entirely new theories.

wei wuxian: huh....

lan qiren, sighing, feeling a migraine: your problem with your thesis is not a lack of focus or ingenuity, but likely to be more a lack of recent, evidentiary sources. you will need to become very familiar with the university archives and dig deep for sources that will back up every argument you make.

he jots down notes on a paper. "you will also need to strictly adhere to the structure and methodology of these articles, especially given how radical your thesis will be. if you are diligent enough, you may just be able to submit your thesis without too much of a delay." he slides the list of materials to a gaping wei wuxian. "depending on your output then, we can discuss the possibility of submitting this for peer review."

"peer review." wei wuxian repeats. "as in, that thing where some uppity committee of old coots put their stamp of approval for it to become the reading materials of undergrads like me. you're joking."

lan qiren chooses to ignore the sentiment about peer review committees being uppity old coots, especially considering how he can't completely deny it on account of some of his colleagues, but also as a member said peer review committee, he isn't exactly pleased about being lumped in the same category.

wei wuxian backtracks at his unamused look. "right, you're not joking, of course you're not." he slowly inches the list towards himself. "right, yes, i guess i'll uh, get to it then. ok bye."

----

idk, just, waves hand at wei wuxian candidly explaining new modern cultivation theories over cheerios at 2 in the afternoon to lwj who's trying to help him structure his grad thesis, getting mind blow dick hard at how this messy genius who's talking with his mouth full of half eaten cereal is the object of his affection....

wwx: --oh, oops, your highlighter fell

lwj: mn

wwx: ...aren't you gonna get that?

lwj: it's fine; i'll pick it up later. finish your thought.

wwx: right... i'll pick it up for you!

lwj, fighting for his life, trying to think unsexy thoughts: NO! sit. finish your meal, and then your thought.

[the-voldsoy]

My current thoughts about Remnants (pod), as of ep10

(a disjointed list of theories, thoughts and opinions that have been bouncing around in my head and need to put down somewhere. A lot of this will likely be disproven when e11 comes out.)

(under the cut because there's a lot)

First of all, Sir. I don't think he knows what he's supposed to be doing, really, either. Or rather, he knows the what but not the why. He might be afraid, and that might be for a lot of reasons. It might be for what they're doing together, it might be for A. It might be something else entirely.

I also have half a theory working right now that Sir was either made with the First And Last Place[which I will be calling TFALP from now] (has always been there, doesn't remember anything from before or why), or was a previous Apprentice. In this case, he could be lying to the Apprentice so that he doesn't try to replace Sir in turn.

Sir is not human, we know that. He might have been, once, but he's not anymore. He seems to have some sort of magic(?) that can make A forget things, and possibly has wings (flapping noise in e6). He also may-or-may-not be something of a biblical angel, in the sense that his true form cannot be comprehended by A without his mind exploding.

The Apprentice. He is there to give (unbiased?) judgement about something he doesn't understand. That is his purpose. His memory is wiped every time he gets too close to understanding what TFALP actually is, although it is unclear whether it is because Sir has an ulterior motive or just because A's mind can't handle it all. I'm leaning more towards the "understanding TFALP causes eldritch madness" idea though, it makes more sense with the evidence we have.

It is possible that neither Sir nor A are actual people, but rather constructs made by a larger force, or simply just concepts given bodies

The code of capitalised letters from the episode captions so far is: HE IA M OR EOR LESS MST HAS ILTOT [spaces separate episodes]. The only clue we have been given is a picture of 2-in-1 shampoo/conditioner from Eira. I think this means that it will be able to decode/be separated into words in multiple ways, rather than the words themselves having double meanings, but I have no confirmation for this.

However, I also think it's multiple different codes(?), being separated by every time A is "reset". (look, just hear me out).

The "HEIAMOREORLESS" part came ep1-6, and the "new" A is shown in e7. If we take this as a separation point in the code, then this part reads "He I AMore Or Less" (Am, more). This would make sense in the context of the show itself and other clues we've been given.

But the next part (ep7-10) can't be put into any obvious words (yet). "MSTHASILTOT". This needs to be decoded differently, possibly with an actual cipher.

I don't know, we don't have the whole code yet so it shouldn't make any sense yet so I'm probably completely wrong but you see my point I hope?

So far the morse code reads: Apprentice / reshelve or discard / the question / is not what / it may / first / / appear to / be if indeed / it appears / to be /

I reckon the next parts will say "anything at all". Not a huge theory or anything, I just wanted to guess. However, this does tell us that there is more about "Reshelve or discard" than is immediately obvious. I have so many thoughts about that though, it needs its own post.

The TL;DR of what I think right now is that yes, it is reincarnation, but it's not clear which option makes the person in the Remnant reincarnated -- I think it's the discard option, because reshelve implies that the ones on the shelf can always be moved around but the discarded ones are gone (living a life?).

I am not confident in that though

But if that is the case, then which is worse?

I haven't thought about it very much yet, but all of these Remnants are going to be connected in some way, I just haven't figured out why. It could just be that the show is more fun (on a meta level) when you have to break out the red string, but the fact that Sir seemed to have some sort of investment with e6 makes me think it's more than that.

Or, rather, what was so important about e6? Why did he care so much that A read it? Did it reveal too much too soon, or did Sir have some sort of emotional investment or involvement with it?

If Sir has an involvement with some of the Remnants implies...I don't know what it implies to be honest. That he was a person once? That he does, in fact, feel emotions? That he has read the Remnants? We already know he seen all the Remnants, he's told us that outright, and he says he doesn't remember "the way that you [A] do" (e10). Is Sir God?

That sounds like a joke but I am making faint connections in my mind ok I'll explain that when they're clear enough to see

I think it would be kind of cute if Sir just sort of...went to a jumble sale and bought a bunch of trinkets, and that's why they're all related

Someone in the Discord said those dust-sprite-things might be discarded Remnants also. That doesn't help my theory at all I just wanted to mention it because those Dust Sprites and the letters from e6 and TFALP itself all mean something but I don't know what

When I was reading through the e6 transcript, I forgot that A says he thinks there's something else in there with them. Not sure if he meant the Dust, or TFALP itself, or the Remnants, or something else entirely, but it does intrigue me.

If it is something else, it could be an antagonist of a sort. There seems to be something working against Sir, creating the "paper trails" and showing A e6, which Sir was not happy about. But why was Sir not aware of it happening? He acts as though he should have seen it?? Could it have been left there by A previously, as a clue so that he could try and remember and find answers again?

Why does Sir care so much about A? He apparently has to regularly erase his memories, would it not be easier to get a different random person each time? The fact that it's always the same person makes me think that A was created for specifically this purpose, but he also seems more...human? than Sir, understanding sarcasm and jokes and empathy and that sort of thing. Is A supposed to be a representation of all of humanity? So that he can be a fair judge? Sir does say that A always has the job (e7)

And Sir says that "Things will not change, not until I see fit" in that episode. This implies that he has some level of control over TFALP and the Remnants and how it all works. So the question is, why? Why can he control it, why is it how it is?

Or maybe Sir cares about him because of familiarity, he's gotten used to and fond of A being around, he doesn't want to have to replace him. But that then raises the question of why he kept him around to start, before he got used to him, and it circles back round. Maybe they were both human, once, and they knew each other, and now only Sir remembers for whatever reason.

[theoverlyenthusiasticwriter]

Woof

Read it on Ao3

Masterlist

They're falling for each other. They both know it. There's no going back now. On the evening of Fenrys' birthday in Prythian, Azriel takes him out to a secret spot.

*****

Since Azriel had shown it to him, Fenrys spent much of his time in the theater. The director didn’t mind when he sat in the audience with his notebook and had even given him copies of the lyrics to follow along to.

The music here was haunting. Deep and soulful, Fenrys was only beginning to understand it. Translating it was a near impossible task, but one that kept his mind pleasantly busy. It was strange to actually hear the words he’d been learning these past months. His notes were now filled with pronunciations as well as definitions and grammar.

The technicians were changing out the curtains between songs when Azriel came in. Fenrys was alerted to his presence by the shadows, darkening at his feet as their owner drew closer. Azriel leaned over the back of his seat. “What are you doing?”

Fenrys suppressed a shudder at his voice so close to his ear. “Learning more about your culture.”

Azriel peered at his notes. “Your head is always in that damn book.”

“It's far more interesting than anything you have to show me.”

“Then maybe I’ll find someone else to execute my evening plans with.”

At that, Fenrys looked at him at last. He narrowed his eyes. “What plans?”

“I have somewhere I’d like to show you.”

Interest piqued, Fenrys closed his notebook and stood. Azriel tilted his head to the entrance. “Shall we?”

“Do I get to know where we’re going?” Fenrys followed him outside, blinking against the light of the falling sun.

Azriel shook his head. He held out his arms.

Fenrys sighed but stepped forward to be lifted. Azriel shot into the sky.

The flight was short and by the time Fenrys realized where they were going, it was too late.

“Oh, just fucking drop me.”

“Hush.” Azriel dove down into a clearing.

Fenrys groaned as he was set on his feet. “I thought we were going somewhere interesting.”

“This way.” Azriel set off through the trees.

“We already trained today. I’ve got the whole moving quietly thing down.” Fenrys didn’t point out that it was still light out, if just barely. They were near the peak of the mountain, facing the ocean, so he could see the orange painted sky.

“We’re not training.” Azriel reached back and grabbed his hand. “You said it was your birthday today.”

Fenrys blinked. “I don’t really celebrate my birthday. I was just trying to get you to be nice to me.”

“I’m nice to you.”

“You are not.” Still, Fenrys let him lead him by the hand over one last hill.

 And before them… it was a pool of pure starlight. It glittered in the falling sun rays, stretching nearly to the edge of a cliff and the sea beyond.

“Holy shit.” Fenrys stepped forward and dipped his hand into the liquid. It was like touching silk. “This is beautiful.”

Azriel set down his pack on a rock, then sat to work the laces of his boots. “There are pools like this scattered all over the continent, but they are kept secret. There are rumors that the waters can heal the injured, make wishes come true, make mortals immortal… stuff like that.”

“Let me guess: it doesn’t do any of that.”

“Not that I’ve seen.”

“Why does it glitter?”

“No idea.” Azriel stood, barefoot, and shrugged out of his jacket, fluttering his wings to slide it down them so he could undo the clasp between.

Fenrys watched him. “I was always wondering how that worked.”

Azriel turned. “The shirts don’t have the middle panel. There’s just a clasp on top.” So, half of his spine was revealed, as well as a line of tattoos between his wings.

“Are you going to… swim in it?”

Azriel’s belt dropped onto the rocks. “Yes.”

He stripped of his pants too, then sank into the water.

Fenrys went to the very edge. “Is it cold?”

“No.” Azriel dunked his head. He emerged, pushing his wet hair out of his eyes.

“How can you swim with those wings?”

“Well enough.” They were tucked tight to his body. “Are you coming in?”

Fenrys arched a brow. “Are you sure it won’t turn me into a frog or something?”

“It hasn’t done anything to me.”

“Except magically turn you into an asshole. Oh, wait.” Fenrys grinned and narrowly avoided getting splashed.

He shed himself of everything but his undershorts, reasoning that Azriel had seen him plenty of times. Stepping into the water, he found that it was warm indeed and no deeper than his chest. He ran his hands through it in wonder, bathed in the orange light of the falling sun.

“Fenrys.” Azriel’s voice was hoarser than it had been a moment ago.

Fenrys turned to him and threw the water in his face.

Azriel blinked as glittering rivers dripped across his face.

Fenrys laughed, which earned him his own mouthful of water. He tried to splash Az again only to find his wrists caught in each of Azriel’s hands.

“That’s cheating!”

Azriel shoved his head under the water.

Sputtering as he rose, he bombarded Azriel with he could manage. Azriel gave as good as he got.

By the time the war was over (Fenrys won) the sun had slipped all the way down past the sea. Without it, the pool seemed to glow brighter, as if in recognition of the stars overhead.

Fenrys pushed his wet hair out of his eyes as he stared up at the night sky. He took a breath. “Az, can I tell you something?”

“Of course.” Azriel pushed away from the edge of the pool where he’d been watching the sea. He faced Fenrys.

Fenrys couldn’t look at him. “I don’t think I want to go home.”

Azriel was silent for long enough that Fenrys glanced his way. He’d moved closer without Fenrys realizing. “I don’t want you to go home either.”

Fenrys turned fully towards him. “Does that make me a horrible person? I know my brother is suffering in my wake, but surely… surely…”

“His suffering is not your fault. It’s hers.” Azriel caught his eye. “And your brother is just as capable of making it here too.”

“Connall wouldn’t, though. He wouldn’t betray Maeve like that.”

“Then the results of his actions are not your fault either. He chooses where he puts his loyalty.”

Fenrys nodded, even if his heart sank a little in his chest.

“Don’t think about that right now.” Azriel drifted closer.

“What should I think about instead?”

There was a moment of heavy silence before Azriel lifted a hand, dripping in starlight, to cup Fenrys’ face. “Close your eyes.”

Fenrys closed his eyes.

His heart was pounding, arms limp at his sides. He knew what was coming—what had been building these past few weeks. He didn’t know what to do about it, but he certainly wasn’t about to step away.

Azriel, who had seen the ugliest, darkest parts of him. Azriel, who had offered him a way out. Azriel, who had been nothing but honest, even when it stung.

Even when it didn’t.

Fenrys tilted his face. Azriel exhaled, the breath rushing across his skin.

Then his mouth met Fenrys’, soft and warm and everything he’d imagined. He kissed him, leaning in close so their chests brushed. Fenrys’ hands slid around his waist beneath the water. It was unfamiliar. He’d never kissed a man before, never touched one like this. He liked it, he decided. Azriel was solid, unmoving. He made Fenrys feel small, but not in a bad way. Protected. Coddled.

Azriel’s fingers drifted across the nape of his neck, his other hand settling on the small of his back. He broke the kiss before Fenrys was ready, pulling back bare centimeters.

Fenrys opened his eyes.

Neither of them said anything. There weren’t words anyway.

Fenrys leaned in this time, rising up onto his toes before Azriel met him. His arms slipped from Azriel’s waist to wind around his neck.

The kiss deepened. Azriel’s tongue was hot in his mouth, demanding. It was like a leash had snapped and Fenrys suddenly felt himself being devoured, pressed against the stone at the edge of the pool. He loud out a noise of surprise that had Azriel jerking back.

“I’m sorry. I—”

“It’s okay.” Fenrys kissed him again, but Azriel didn’t allow it to deepen.

“No,” he said, pressing their brows together. “I want to do this right with you. You deserve that much at least.”

Fenrys licked his lips. He’d have to do some research, he decided. He knew the basics of sex between two males, but just that. He’d never had the urge to invite a male into his bed, but he’d also never really thought about it. Very rarely did Maeve allow him to seek pleasure in other avenues and when she did, he usually just got as shit faced as possible. Sex wasn’t something he did for himself.

But maybe with Az…

Another day. Fenrys knew if he pushed hard enough, Azriel would give in, but it could wait. They had time.

Azriel lifted his head and pressed a kiss to Fenrys’ brow. “I brought you some of that wine you like.”

“Really?”

“In my pack. Ah, ah, I’ll get it.” Azriel caught his wrist when he lunged for the bag. He was smiling.

Azriel hadn’t brought glasses, so Fenrys swigged from the bottle. The wine was so sweet it was hard to believe there was any alcohol in it at all. In fact, even if it was just bubbly juice, Fenrys would still drink it.

Azriel took his own sip before setting it back on the rocks. He reached for his bag again. “I have something else for you. It’s just something small, really…”

Fenrys drifted closer peering over his shoulder.

Azriel offered him a small rectangular parcel, horribly wrapped in brown paper.

“Did you let a toddler wrap this?” Fenrys asked as he took it.

Azriel scowled. “I wrapped it.”

“I see. So, I’ve found a weakness of the great shadowsinger: wrapping gifts.”

“Just open it, jackass.”

Smiling so hard his face hurt, Fenrys tore through the paper to reveal a small leather-bound book. A tie held it closed and pinned one of the charcoal pencils Fenrys preferred to its side.

Azriel was rubbing the back of his neck. “I noticed you were running out of room in the other one and I thought…”

“I love it,” Fenrys interrupted. He kissed Azriel on the mouth. “Thank you.”

“Cassian bought you some new quills to go with.”

“Spoiling his gift like that? How cruel.”

“It was my idea,” Azriel said around a pout.

The thought warmed Fenrys to the core: the two greatest warriors in this land, whispering behind his back about a birthday gift.

Azriel put the notebook back in his bag away from the water and drew Fenrys back in. “Your Prythian is getting better.”

“You’re damn right it is.”

“Given that you never shut up, I suppose you do practice a lot.”

“Oh, fuck you.” Fenrys pushed him away. “Let’s see you learn a new language.”

“I could. I mean, I would.” Azriel cocked his head, his hair glittering blue. “You could teach me yours.”

“I think you might be too old. What’s that saying about old dogs and new tricks?”

Azriel crossed his arms over his chest. “I bet I could teach you a few new tricks, puppy.”

Fenrys grinned. “Woof.”

Azriel reached out and took his wrist, drawing him back in. He tucked his hair behind a pointed ear and applied his mouth to Fenrys’ throat. “I could have you yapping for me like a proper lap dog.”

Fenrys shuddered and all his confidence bled from him, replaced by the blush that took over his cheeks. He didn’t even have a witty comeback.

“Come on,” Azriel said as he pulled back. “Let’s go home.”

[aritamargarita]

GOLDEN || 007

me after lying for more than a week. the streak is over guys. but it wasnt my fault ok it was actually tumblrs!!!

the fact i have had to revise this chapter around five times GOOD GOD. i finally found an idea to focus on. originally wanted it to be strictly ecw, but we ended up heading on back to wcw lol. shorter than id like it to be but..i split it heehee

id also like to clarify things our tenure is like: ecw (1994-1996) > wcw (february 1996-september 1997) > ecw (october/november 1997) > wwf (december 1997)... how fun is that? hope that makes sense i think i talk about lore too much (yes i will go into detail)

YOU THINK TROUBLE follows you almost everywhere you go. When you went to WCW, you just wanted some peace. Of course, you’re just so unlucky that you can never EVER get what you want.

“Did you seriously crawl all the way from the ring?”

You’re not sure whether to commend him for his efforts or just be disappointed.

“Jeez, you’re so pathetic,” You say. “You can’t even stand on your own feet. I almost feel sorry for you.”

Raven doesn’t have the energy to look up, but he definitely knows it’s you. His vision is blurred, with the only thing in his view being your shoes.

Your voice sends Raven into a frenzy. While he hates the way you’re talking down to him, he loves the sound of it. He’s not sure if it’s his mind being all woozy.

….He’s bleeding, too. It’s noticeable, especially on his face. Some of his curls were also stained with red. You knew for a fact Stevie and Sandman did a number on him during his match.

Especially since the latter swung by afterwards and spilled the deets. Sandman was already lighting up a cigarette by the time he got to you. You can only wonder how he got it so fast..

“I set him straight.” He said, a puff of smoke hitting you in your face.

You wave it out the way, scrunching your nose. You’re not entirely sure what he said, but you don’t really care. “Can you—can you like, at least blow somewhere else?”

He just laughs at you. “Needed you to get your head out of the clouds.”

You’re unsure what number cigarette he’s on now. You’re too busy stuck in your thoughts to care. “I was listening, I-I swear.”

“Oh yeah? Then what did I just say?”

“…….”

Your silence causes him to puff more smoke in your direction. Goddamn it. You’re going to have a problem with him if you end up getting any secondhand smoke symptoms..

“Ha. Knew ya’ weren’t listening. I’ll say it again. You didn’t do it, so I ended up doing it myself. You’re letting this idiot fuck you guys over.”

At the time, you definitely weren’t listening. You were backstage pacing back and forth, hoping that Stevie made it out alright. You hadn’t seen him since he stormed out there and told you to stay behind.

Seeing Raven beaten down makes you feel complete. It makes you feel like you got your revenge, even if it was by proxy.

You kneel down to his level. “It’s crazy that it ended up like this. You’ve lost everyone, huh? I may be the only person you have left.”

You may be right. Raven’s lost everything. He’s lost Beulah. He’s lost his little lackeys. They’re all gone. They want nothing to do with him.

He’s half the man he used to be.

And he can’t say you didn’t try. You really, really did. For his sake. You destroyed yourself everyday so he’d be happy.

You left Terry’s side for him. You’ve even messed Tommy up so he could win his matches. You’ve never EVER received a ‘thank you’. Nothing was ever given to you in return.

Either way, if he wouldn’t give you appreciation, you hoped that someone else would. There were other people in the nest you could talk to..

You used to talk to Beulah the most, as she would request for you specifically to curl her hair. In her words: “there’s no one else that can do it like you”. She’s always been incredibly sweet to you.

The moment she had aligned herself with Tommy Dreamer was when things got worse. Raven forbid you from ever talking to her again. Don’t look at her. Don’t even THINK of her.

She didn’t exist in your life anymore.

After that, you really didn’t have any friends outside of her. Luckily, you then found yourself finding comfort in none other than Stevie Richards.

It surprised you. He was so peppy and he always looked as bright as the sun. He’s someone you thought you’d get annoyed with, but in the end, you felt like you two had a lot more in common.

Whenever you and him found something even the slightest bit funny, the two of you would burst into giggles.

It was almost scary how abrupt your joy would come to an end when Raven walked into the room.

When he’d do that, sometimes he will stare at you two. If you were lucky, you’d get out of it without him berating you. You two feel like you’re walking on eggshells around him.

…You’ve come to the conclusion that Raven can’t stand happiness. It was probably because he’s never had any in life. Because he didn’t have it, none of you in the Nest could.

It made you feel bad for him. He’s had a strange upbringing, so you felt like if you left him, he’d fall apart.

Maybe that’s why he acts the way he does. You wish you could open his head and just take a look at his brain. You wonder what’s going on in there.

You could never figure it out, but then came Kimona Wanalaya. She came into the picture sooner than you thought. Almost out of nowhere. Raven definitely wanted a place to pin his sadness.

Obviously, she was the cushion. He was the pin. She was very quiet, a little bit snarky. You figured Raven probably played a part in her behavior.

She always wore the cutest clothes though, that you had to admit. Once you told her as much, Kimona had told you that you’re welcome to come through her closet anytime.

You thought about it. It’s a hard maybe. Thing is, you’ve actually started matching with Stevie on occasion. Just to see how it feels.

You had to cut some of your old denim jeans as short as you could possibly get them.

Not too much, of course. There’s more of a mystery when someone’s covered up, you think. Then again, you had to wear crop tops, so eh.

Hey, on the bright side, no wardrobe malfunctions!

It got a kick out of the crowd, seeing you jump around and be all hyper as you head towards the ring. Mimicking him was really fun.

Raven didn’t like it though. He didn’t like how close you two were getting at all. It was all his fault though, he’s pretty cold to the both of you. It’s inevitable that you two would start to get along.

He really thought you’d get jealous of Kimona. That’s why he brought her around in the first place, at least that’s what he was telling himself. Yet you’re too focused on Stevie to even pay him any mind.

He never said anything about it either. All he could do was lie in the bed he made.

It’s all his fault and there’s nothing he could do to fix it. He shouldn’t have let you two get confident enough to leave him. None of you had the guts to get anything done.

He was the hero. It wasn’t any of you that aligned himself with him. He was the hero at the end of this story, you guys were just pawns to be used along the way.

Raven’s the winner. He always has been and always will be.

But winners don’t writhe on the ground while bleeding. He’s still having a hard time stabilizing himself.

He raises up a hand and tries to hold onto you in an attempt to get any kind of leverage, but you scoot away. “Ew, stop. You’re gonna get blood on me..”

Just as you say that, he spits out a string of blood, murmuring something that you couldn’t hear. 

You don’t really care.

“I tried helping you, Raven. I really did. It may be a stretch, but I’m almost the only person that can stand being around you just a little bit. There's no one that'll ever treat you like I do."

It was halfway a lie. You were sure if you stood nearby him any other time, you’d either try to claw his eyes out or end up crying. You hope it ends up being the former.

“I bet everyone loves you.” He finally says something understandable, using his hand to try and wipe away blood that was masking his vision.

He doesn’t turn upward to face you, deciding to stare right into the space behind. “I can only begin to wonder how that felt. Being appreciated and wanted in society. To be respected, not feared…”

“Oh yes. People love me.” You confirm. “You love me too.”

“….I don’t.”

“You definitely do. Don’t kid yourself…” You’re looking straight at him. "Haven't your parents ever told you its not good to lie?"

Maybe he does love you. No, he doesn’t know what he feels around you. It’s not contempt and it’s not admiration either.

The moment he says something that directly confronts the problem is the moment that you’ve won. He doesn’t want to give you that satisfaction.

“I know for a fact you love me, because you don’t have anyone else that does.” You can’t fight the small smile on your face. “You know, people recognizing their self-worth and all that.”

You say it so casually. Raven’s clenching his fist. The audacity of it all. You’re not even helping him. You should be helping him back to his feet and whispering that everything would be okay.

Yet here you are. You’re making fun of him.

It’s something that neither of you would’ve expected. He fucking hates how it ended up being this way.

This isn’t fair. None of it is.

You feel like Raven’s hurt you for far too long. It’s his turn to get the short end of the stick.

Raven knew that it was inevitable he’d see you again, but not like this. This wasn’t the way he planned for things to go.

You must be a curse. Ruining everything one step at a time. Then again, it was partially his mothers fault as well.

Everything was crafted to be so meticulous. He would be there, then work his way back into your life and right inside of your head, just like old times. And if Stevie’s there, you’re sure to follow.

It’s not like things weren’t going to plan at first. He knew he would follow you to WCW once you left, that’s why he stopped asking.

As soon as you saw him in the crowd, you knew that you were in for a ton of shit. First, it’s Sting you had to deal with, now on top of that you had to deal with Raven?!

It only made you feel the slightest bit better to see Stevie frantically waving at you in the crowd as well. It made you a little upset seeing them together, mainly because he’s made so much progress with leaving Raven in the dust.

Unfortunately for Raven, the one damn time that his mother was backstage trying to get in was when it started to fall apart. You shouldn’t have been there!

And thus began the reckoning, as he would call it.

“Oh, that [Name] girl is so sweet! Why don’t you invite her over for dinner?” Raven’s mother would urge him to invite you over every chance she got. He definitely didn’t want you inside his house.

“No mom.” He’d always respond. “She can’t come over.”

"Why not, Scotty?"

Raven cringes. He hates when she calls him that. It’s not who he is anymore. "Because. I don't want her to.."

"Well, please reconsider." She says, laying the table cloth down onto the table. "What about your other friend, Chris Kanyon, wasn’t it?”

“I don't care.” He waves her off. “Why do you even want them to come anyway?”

“I just think they would be wonderful guests to have. I'm sure Chastity would enjoy the company as well."

If you came over, nothing would work. He doesn't exactly know how you'll react to him either.

You had stopped listening to him near the end of your tenure, which really pissed him off. You slowly started to realize that he can’t control you anymore. He shouldn't have in the first place. Before you left, you decided to make amends with ones that you've done wrong.

..With everyone except for him. Because you truly never did anything to hurt him. It's been him hurting you this entire time. And you just sat there and took it because you didn't know any better.

You feel like this was inevitable, just like a moth to a flame, you find yourself coming right back to Raven. Even after you’ve joined the NWO.

Really. Who could resist? It was an invite from his own mother! She completely ignored his request, holding onto the statement that some company would do him good.

You probably should’ve known that this would be a segment somehow, too..

His mother is right by your side with a smile. "I really hope you're enjoying the stay.”

“I am! You have a really beautiful home.” Seriously. It was huge. His parents must’ve been millionaires, if not billionaires. There’s no way this could really be Raven’s childhood home, could it?

You feel like everything is a lie. From his “terrible” upbringing, to the way he treated you and the others..

Did this mean he just did it because he could?! 

“I’m not sure where Scotty is. I think it’s so rude he won’t come and greet you. I’m sorry about that. It’s something he’s working on in his treatment.”

“Treatment, you say?” Oh, now you’re curious. 

“Oh, yes! He didn’t tell you?” Of course he didn’t. “He’s been seeing a doctor for his behavior as of late. It’s a slow process, but I miss my little boy…..”

You feel bad for her. You really did. Yet you want to tell her how bad her son has treated you and a few others, but you’re sure it’s not what she wants to hear right now. 

“Feel free to make yourself at home, [Name]. In the meantime, I can make you something to drink if you’d like?” His mother seemed very enthusiastic about you being here. “Wine? Maybe water?”

You shake your head. “No, I’m good, thank you.”

Chastity is too engrossed in her magazine to notice you in the room at first, but when her mother clears her throat, she looks up. 

Seeing it’s you, a smile grows on her face. “Hey, [Name].” She greets.

You knew Chastity was from ECW, but by the time she was there, you were already departed from the company. “Hi there, Chas.” You wave. “Anything new?”

She sets the magazine flat onto the table. “Hey. Yeah. Raven’s friend is getting on my nerves. He thinks I like him or something. I can't even begin to imagine why he comes over here in the—“

A creaking sound coming from the other room makes the three of you turn around. It's Kanyon, followed by a sluggish Raven coming down the steps.

Upon seeing your face, Raven's completely startled. "What the hell is she doing here? Mooom, I told you, I didn't want her to come over!"

Ouch, way to greet your guests..

His mother isn't pleased. The look of embarrassment spreads on her face like a wildfire. "Scotty! That's no way you should say hello.."

Raven doesn't respond, just shakes his head. What can he do about it now that you're here? Absolutely nothing, so he just staggers over to you. "Hey."

"Hi. Nice place you've got here."

He scoffs. You’re damn right it’s a nice place. It’s what he wants to say, but is only able to mutter out a: “Right. Whatever.”

“I mean, I didn't know you had such a big house.” You say. “Like wow.”

Raven scoffs. “It’s nothing. You always exaggerate stuff.”

You motion outside, ignoring his previous comment. “You even have a pool! I know my place is a bit spacious, but holy shit, I don’t even have a pool.”

...Something tells you he’s not happy to see you at all. He just walks past you and heads towards the couch. You really were surprised though. He'd go on and on about his rough upbringing, but you weren't exactly sure if you believed him or not now.

His mother huffs. “I’m sorry. He doesn’t seem to be in a good mood right now..” She expectantly looks at Kanyon, but he only shrugs at her.

Kanyon gives you a wave though. “Hey. You’re [Name], right? From ECW?”

“Yeah, yeah I am. And you are…?”

“Chris Kanyon.”

You don’t recognize him, yet you still hold out your hand for him to shake. “I see. Nice to meet you, then!”

“Raven talks about you a lot. You should see all the stuff he’s got in his room about..” Kanyon is just about to continue, but Raven immediately launches out of his seat to cut him off.

“Yo, Kanyon,” His voice sounded strained. “I wanted to show ya’ a thing in our backyard. You know. The thing I was talking about? C’mon, dude.”

“Wait, what thing?”

Raven’s already shoving the poor guy outside. You watch them leave in suspicion, then turn back around to his mother. She’s only waving the two off, telling them not to make much of a mess.

“Hey, can I use your bathroom?” You ask.

She nods. “Of course. Up the stairs to the right, sweetie.”

“Thanks.” You give her a nod, then turn away to head up the stairs. You didn’t actually have to use the bathroom, obviously. You just want to know what the heck Raven’s got in his room for him to cut Kanyon off like that.

He's bad at keeping secrets, that's for sure. Once you get up there, you try to be a little quiet as you slink the opposite way. You peek through one door and you're met with a decently sized room. It's nice. Neatly decorated, clean, and a ton of space. Holy shit, they really are rich!

This doesn't seem to be his room anyway. It may be his mother's. You don't see anything that would tick off the boxes that it could be his. He mentioned that he was a "rock guy", so you figure he'd have some type of memorabilia in his room.

You close it and move on. You wish you could compliment her on how nice it was, but you were supposed to be in the bathroom, not snooping around.

The next room that was down the hall seemed to be what you were looking for. Of course he had something on the door that said, "DO NOT ENTER". He's so corny.

Compared to the other room, this totally looked like his. It's a little more stuffy, but the decorations inside seem to make up for it. Nothing seems to be out of the ordinary, save for the posters displayed on his wall.

Again, you're not surprised. He would always proudly effuse that he was a huge rock fan. He even wore the shirts to back it up. Not to mention how annoying he would get when you two were in the car together. Whatever CDS he brought...was the shit that you had to listen to for the entire trip.

For some reason, you feel a little creepy invading his space like this, even feel like you’re a little rude for overstepping a boundary. 

Then again, he kinda deserved it. As bad as it sounded, he was just getting karma. You’re not exactly sure if therapy was going to help him enough. 

That man is broken and you’re not a construction worker. You can’t fix him.

You just head into his room and slowly close the door behind you, leaving it open juuust a little bit so that you can hear better. You’d just be in and out once you find what you were looking for. 

This would be a little hard. His room was a little more disorganized. You have to kneel down to move things around from the end of his bed. 

At first, it starts to look like you weren’t going to strike gold at all. But your hand brushes up against something hard under the pile of clothes you tried to sort out next.

There’s some sort of small storage bin poking out from the bottom of his bed. Really weird.

You shuffle more clothes around and pull it out. You seriously have to make this quick, because you knew the others would probably start to wonder why you're upstairs for so long. You pop the top open and what you find isn't what you would expect.

Why were there so many pictures of you in here?

Some candids, some cuttings from the WCW magazine..

What the fuck.

What the fuck is going on here.

You drop it quickly and it flutters back into the bin. It's just as you thought, he's as much as a problem as Sting, if not WORSE. You don't even think Sting's gone as far as getting photos of you, but goddamn.

Scarily enough, you feel flattered. You just want to hit yourself for even feeling that way. This is wrong. Very, very wrong.

It's definitely time to get the fuck out of dodge, before you can even explore why you aren't as alarmed as you should be. You close the top on the bin and shove it where it was, then throw some clothes over it.

You stand up from your spot and look at a desk that was nearby. There was some sort of collectible trading card set on there. You figure you'll take something, just because you can. Call it a gift to yourself, a collateral for your mental health.

The coast is clear, so you make your way out of his room and towards the steps. For a second you have to take a breath, holding onto the banister.

You start to think maybe you should go home. That would be the best decision. You head back down the stairs and walk over to the living room area. "Chastity," You call her and she looks up at you. "I'm gonna head out. I just remembered I had something to do. Can you tell your mother that I'm sorry?"

She looks at you in confusion. "You got here not too long ago. Are you okay??" The look on your face is a little too obvious. Plus, you didn't call her a nickname.

"I'm fine, really!" You exclaim louder than intended. "Seriously. Just a little on edge because I forgot something really important. I'll see you later?"

Chastity figures she wouldn't get anywhere else with you, so she gives a thumbs up and lets you go for now.

It's only when you head out the door, was when you started to feel a little bit sick. You don't know what happened, but you just feel like you don't want to see Raven for a while.

It's what he would have wanted anyways. You weren't welcome in his house.

You had no choice but to respect his wishes.

i keep trying to do things..but tumblr just wont let me be great?!?!?!?!

THIS IS NOT OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED PROGRAM..the bret fans get a double u next chapter i promise. desktop is literally acting up for me now, though i think it may just be THIS draft if that makes sense???

now we have two stalkers. reader just has more history with raven thats why she kinda likes this. sting's gonna slam dunk knock it out of the park this shit though trust me!

[survey--s]

673.

What were you doing before you started taking this survey? Picking a photo for the header and watching Wallace & Gromit.

Do you live somewhere where it’s completely safe to walk alone at night? I do, but I pretty much never walk around alone at night anyway.

Have you ever lived with someone who was a total slob? Yeah. He was a flatmate and really gross - when he got kicked out we had to clear his room and there were LAYERS of mould everywhere. Eurgh. It took weeks for it to be habitable again lol.

Would you rather be able to talk to animals or be fluent in every language? If you were fluent in every language surely that includes animal ones?

Does your kitchen have a pantry? Ha no. Our kitchen is TINY.

Do you live below your means? Or do you spend every penny you have? We live well within our means. We're lucky that we live in a cheap area and have a cheap mortgage. Our bills come to less than half my total salary each month so we have plenty left over as Mike earns way more than me. Which is good as we have four animals and like to buy stuff, lol.

What are some foods you enjoy cooking? I don't enjoy cooking,it's just something that has to be done.

Have you ever watched Battlestar Galactica? Yeah,my mum used to like that show but I never got into it. She used to watch it on rainy Sunday afternoons when I was a kid.

Can others often tell what you’re feeling by your facial expressions? Ha - sometimes. I definitely have resting bitch face.

Have you ever interviewed a job applicant at your workplace? Yes, several times actually. I always hated doing interviews though.

Did you ever skip class when you were in school? If so, was there a particular class that you skipped the most? No, because they'd have just rung my parents and I'd have been given a massive bollocking lol.

In your opinion, what is it that makes someone a good person? Behaving decently when they know nobody's watching.

Are you happy with the life you’re living? Yes.

How do your political beliefs compare to those of your parents? I'm much more liberal than either of my parents, but they're not that right-wing really. Just set in their ways.

What do you think of the Baby Boomer generation? Nothing. I mean, everyone is different. I don't think stereotyping an entire generation as a certain characteristic helps anyone, tbh.

Have you ever gone over 3 months without shaving/waxing your legs? In the past, but personally I enjoy the feeling of being clean-shaven so I don't like to leave it longer than a day or two.

Are you high-maintenance? No.

What was the last non-fiction book you read? I can't remember. Probably a textbook.

Would you ever consider being a foster parent? No. I have zero desire to have my own kids, let alone look after someone else's.

Are you able to crack any of your joints? Yeah, all of them except my fingers.

What’s your favorite movie genre? Comedy or fantasy.

What’s something that’s been on your mind a lot lately? Christmas, work, my birthday.

What was the last thing someone asked you for advice on? I honestly can't remember.

Have you ever kissed 3 or more people in the same day? Yes.

What’s your opinion on lottery tickets? Waste of money, or no? Lottery tickets are a waste of money.

What are some things that make others cry, that don’t make you cry at all? I'm not sure about cry, but I can read stories about crimes and stuff without them really impacting me. I'm not sure if that's good or bad lol.

Are you a very detail-oriented person? Or are you better at seeing the big picture? I'm both, depending on the circumstances.

Do you have any upcoming plans with friends? Next month, yeah. Susie and I have our annual Christmas afternoon tea coming up!

What was the last picture message you received, and from whom? It was an advert for a dog dental chew thing from my mum.

Have you ever swam in a saltwater pool? Yeah, I really didn't like it.

What kinds of leisure activities did your family do together when you were growing up? Hiking, swimming, skiing, skating, bike rides, board games.

What color suits you more: teal or black? Black.

What continent do you live on? Europe.

[absolutesort]

MILES & FRANKIE — NIGHT TWENTY-NINE.

location : kitchen and then terrace.

time :   after frankie kisses adela, post-challenge.

description : miles and frankie talk about monster house and kiss on the terrace.

featuring :   miles   /  @heatwayve

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

sighing, frankie pushes up from her seat, nodding at mali and adela and feeling awkward somehow as she makes her way to the other part of the kitchen, where the islanders are making drinks. she drops her elbows down onto the counter next to miles, scootching him along a place. "hey," she says, not meeting his gaze, because all game it feels kinda like they've been dancing around each other, nervous for a repeat of the last game. or hoping for it. "it said islanders you think are into you, and i actually know you're into me, so..." she snorts. "that's why."

miles o'sullivan

god, he probably looks like a tool having walked off like that. granted, there was no way he could've sat around and watched them suck face any longer, because yeah, he was jealous – but he's not actually mad about it or anything. "what? no, it's cool," he laughs, fixing her with a grin, "i don't want you to kiss me in a challenge or on a dare anyway." he wants their next kiss to be outside of one, without the excuse or the implication that it was only done because of someone else's prompting.

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

"what are you making me?" she nods to the glasses and various bits of fruit in front of them. she's assuming that dylan was here somewhere, and has snuck off to find phoebe. she'l probably get an earful from him later. or not, but his views on her antics during challenges are always to be taken with a grain of salt. it's not like he's being a saint. "yeah?" she asks, elbow pushing against his. "why? is a challenge not real enough for you?" god forbid he says something corny about wanting her to pick him for him and not because of a piece of paper telling her to, although actually that would probably be pretty cute. "you thought yesterday was too tame?"

miles o'sullivan

"dunno. dylan was just about to show me," he says, since he's been attending a bartending lesson as they speak. "oh, it was pretty fucking real," miles laughs, thinking about yesterday. it's still the closest he's gotten to her. "just might be nice to not have everyone watching and screaming in my ear, y'know? feels like we've already given them enough of a show. don't know if they could handle it," he jokes, eyes flashing in a way that implies a sort of shared mischief or . . . well, something between them that he wouldn't mind keeping between them. "you wanna bunk with me again tonight?"

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

she plucks a chunk of mint from the chopping board, and tosses it into her mouth like a cowboy's toothpick. "we could always get a little creative. come up with a new cocktail. the miles and frankie special." his reasons for wanting to kiss her outside of a challenge are endearing enough that she has to look away, tips of her ears flushing as she chews on the end of the mint. "aw, shucks..." she sighs, adopting the role of the country bumpkin. "yeah, no, i know what you mean... with everyone watching it feels like, less personal." her eyes snap across to him again, and she tears her sprig of mint in half, holding the other out towards his mouth. "only if you get all sexy and macho on me. i'm not asking you tomorrow, i'm asking you tonight." frankie scoffs, her impression sounding more like batman than miles, and then softens slightly.  "yes, miles. i would absolutely love to bunk with you again. you are the best bunk mate i could ask for." she'd actually made her way over here to ask him, but he's beat her to it, like he beats her at everything else. except that challenge. she'll have to laud it over him later. "are you top or bottom bunk, tonight?" 

miles o'sullivan

"okay, sure," he takes out two cups, "what goes in first? you add an ingredient, then i will. eventually it'll make something." and dylan's eye will start twitching mysteriously. miles catches the way she looks away, disguising any feeling with a goofy voice and he smiles fondly. "yeah, it's fun, very...frat party, but i would like to kiss someone in here without everyone shouting over my shoulder," there's a certain emphasis that he places on someone that makes it pretty clear that he means her. she makes fun of his words from last night and he's totally cheesing, "caught me. i had every intention of asking you tomorrow," well, only if last night went well, and...to him, it really did. still, it feels like a total success that he's convinced her twice, cheeks almost aching from the pressure of his smile when frankie accepts. "well, i know we've established that i can switch off, but...i'll take the top," he leans on his side at the countertop so he's facing her more directly, playing along with whatever this bit is, "that work for you?"

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

she doesn't want to move and disrupt whatever energy's flowing between them right now, so instead she leans across him, one hand on his shoulder as support, stretching until her fingers lock around the kahlúa bottle and she sinks back into place. she swills a measure of it into each glass, screws the cap back onto the bottle, and turns her stare back to miles. "your move." it feels good to have an activity to busy themselves with, so that when he starts talking about how he wants to kiss someone without everybody and their nana ogling (brave of him) it isn't quite so heavy, it can slide under the radar of another stupid game, so that they can dance around the centre of what they're actually talking about. "maybe you should take that someone to the terrace." she says, as if she's giving him relationship advice on adela, or mali, and honestly, maybe she is, but it feels too fucking pointed not to be about her. "it's not totally private, but it's better than like, the fucking kitchen, so..." she was propped on both her elbows, giving her the out to look ahead, but now she's on one, body angling back towards his, the hand that isn't propping her up toying with the hem of his shirt. "that works. when me and leo used to bunk bed, i'd stick shit up the bottom and pretend the top one was haunted so he'd let me have it." she knows that isn't what they're talking about, and that much is obvious in the flash of her eyes when she looks at him. "oh! i meant to tell you. i had a brain wave when i was talking to josh earlier. my favourite buscemi is randall. monsters inc, you know?" 

miles o'sullivan

miles reaches for a bottle of something when frankie cuts him off with a suggestion. he tries to look focused on what he's doing, a lopsided grin tugging at the corner of his lip. "yeah?" he remarks, "alright, yeah, that's a good idea. i'll ask them in a bit." playing coy for no reason other than following along with the bit, like the imaginary someone could possibly be someone else that's not her. the terrace is such an elusive, sexy concept to miles – maybe not to the islanders who've been here for ages, but he hasn't even been out there yet, save for the two seconds he and frankie peeked it on their house tour before opening every drawer and cabinet in the dressing room. he finishes pouring. "good shout. i still think you've got to rewatch g-force, though, i think you'd see things my way," he decides, taking a sip of the cup in front of him. he wrinkles his nose. "yeah, i can already tell this is gonna be shit," he coughs. "wanna grab a few beers and head up to the terrace with me?" miles asks, an indicative tilt of his head as a cheeky grin punctuates the question.

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

the fact that she's smiling from ear to fucking ear about something as stupid as a g-force reference tells frankie she's in trouble—the kind of trouble that makes you forget you already have a girl back home. "fine. soon as we get out of here, you and me, buscemi movie marathon."  her fingers signal between her eyes and his, as if to say i'm watching you. "not in a netflix and chill way, i take my steve buscemi movies seriously."  honestly, she's offended that he doesn't care to play out her mystery cocktail idea, but then his questions bulldozing every other thought in her head, skin flushed hot at the nape of her neck, and suddenly short of breath. "wait, me?" as if that wasn't obvious. but somehow, there's always room for doubt, like this whole thing is one big smoke-and-mirrors game that will snap away the moment she does something. got you. isn't that how casa amor works?  "like, now?" she thought she'd have more time. going up there feels like opening the coraline hole in the wall and crawling through to the other side, like making a choice she isn't ready to make. would she let miles sew buttons onto her eyes?  "oh. i get it. you want me to keep josh's spot warm for him...  cute." she's playing off her surprise with humour, but hopes the heat in her cheeks doesn't translate into colour.  "sure. what's your favourite? you seem like a budweiser guy." frankie'll take bud over heineken, but honestly she's more of a stella kinda girl. she moves to swing open the door of the fridge, begins loading up her arms with bottles and cans, whistling as she goes. "you wanna get snacks?"

TERRACE.

miles o'sullivan

"see, okay, when you say buscemi marathon..." he begins, opening the door for frankie. he passes her one of the beers they've grabbed, but not before being a total gentleman and popping the cap off for her with his teeth. classy. "does that include boss baby? yes or no?" he asks her. miles is the first to take a seat, beckoning her closer. but this also allows her to decide the proximity. he's not nervous, exactly, but it is the first time they've been really alone together since they met. but he's playing it cool. "and i am actually a bit desperate to get your thoughts on monster house while we're at it." this actually could make or break whether he tries to stick it on her.

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

“neat party trick,” frankie notes, gladly accepting the beer and taking a hearty swig. “that supposed to impress me?” it would probably impress her more if she couldn’t do it herself. as if she hadn’t learned for the sole purpose of being that girl who can open a bottle with her teeth at late night bonfires on the beach in naples. she drops down beside him, leaving a few inches space for the lord, but they’re close enough that when she draws her knees up in front of her, they rest against the edge of his thigh. “you know my brother actually lost a tooth that way,” if the stories are to be believed—there’s also rumours that he lost it in a scrap with a travelling salesman, or headbutting a member of social services when they tried to take her and leo away, or (the most likely scenario) being tossed around the boxing ring by the reigning champ from orlando. “so be careful,” subconsciously, her finger reaches out, running itself over the enamel of his teeth. “no boss baby. i don’t fuck with boss baby. we can hate watch it, but that’s it.” she takes another swig of her beer, drops the hand that toys with his mouth to link his fingers instead, not quite holding his hand, but rather dragging it into her lap to run her fingers over the intents in his skin. affection's like a mother tongue to frankie, more hers than speech could ever be. with words, she often ruins it. they never sound right in her mouth. “I’M ON YOUR LAWN, NEBBERCRACKER…” frankie bleats, in a hideous rendition of bones, sides splitting with laughter, to the point where she almost knocks over her beer, hooking it back with her knee. “honestly, it reminded me of the fleetwood mac rumours album. two people who can’t escape each other, they know it’s toxic but for some reason they can’t move on… it was poetic, honestly. except in this case, one of the people is a house. but the house is his wife, right?”

miles o'sullivan

"had to redeem myself from my abysmal pong game earlier. but don't worry, i think i've picked up on the fact that it'd take a bit more than that," he laughs. "'m missing a tooth, too. not from opening bottles, i got kicked in the face," he gently moves her fingers to one of his top teeth on the left, "that one's fake." she sits close but not overtly so, and for a moment miles wonders if it was the right move continuing their conversation from downstairs, but her impression of jason lee's voice makes him crack up so hard that he doesn't care. "no, no, i don't fuck with boss baby either, thank god," miles agrees with her. "that is the most profound analysis of monster house i've ever heard, though. dunno, though, because it was more like he was trapped in something unhealthy but couldn't leave 'cause he loved her so much. nice how it surprises you for a bit, you think he's the villain the whole time but really, he's like, the victim? poor bastard," miles clicks his tongue against his teeth before taking a sip of his drink. his gaze flickers back up to meet hers a little more gently. frankie puts on a pretty boisterous face throughout the day, but getting josh's perspective, miles knows that the original islanders are dealing with a lot more than they let on. he draws his thumb over the palm of her hand, gentle, but there's an intentional way he has it pinned to her thigh. "how's your day been, though? i feel like i barely talked to you, so busy being grafted, there was like a fuckin' waiting list," he grins at her, "probably feels pretty good to know that all of us are proper into ya." considering she had half the group at her side during that dare.

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

her fingers are still in his mouth, trailing over his teeth as he speaks, playing spot the difference with the one he claims is fake and the others beside it, posts on a picket-fenced lawn. “was pretty fucking horrifying to watch, actually. how many did you score again? zero? where’s that i’m a fucking athlete energy now?” still, it hadn’t given her the ick. if anything, it was endearing to watch miles humbled into a more pathetic version of himself, and instinctively she shifts closer to balance out the fact that she’s kind of shitting on him. she’s always trapped in the seesaw of tugging him closer and pushing him away, a mind that changes like the tides when it comes to what she wants, who she wants, fickle and unforgiving—but right now, with her thumb trailing over his lower lip, she doesn’t feel too much like running. “who the fuck would kick you in the face? tell me who did it. i’ll burn their house down.” she probably would, too, though she’s assuming it was an accident, can’t imagine anyone deciding that miles deserves a fucking boot to the face. poor lad. “that’s so romantic…” frankie comments, of his monster house analysis, girlish and overly sentimental, and somehow giving jenny. “literally goals. i want a love like theirs. i’m gonna get them to redo my promo so i can be like… i’m looking to find a love like the old man and and the fucked up house slash wife he can’t escape in the 2006 classic monster house, and i’ll force them to put it in the show. i’ll say, you have to do it or i’ll stop performing. i refuse to be a piece in your games, peeta mellark style or whatever.” the thumb that’s pressed against his lip moves to trail down the point of his nose and back up again, sliding over each eyebrow in turn, like she’s piecing together the parts of his face through touch alone.

“oh, fuck off, there was not a fucking waiting list. and if there was, you’d be at the fuckin’ top, queueing up to sign my dance card for the ball…” her laughter’s the visceral kind, red hot and raking through her so hard that her teeth chink against the edge of her beer bottle, and she feels the aftershock zing through her nerve endings. it judders in her wisdom teeth, whole body shivering. “honestly. my day was quiet. nobody tried to tackle me to the ground. what’s all that about?” she notices then that miles doesn’t have a beer, plucks one from the sofa, cracks the cap off with her own teeth and slots it between his thighs with a knowing smirk. an eye for an eye. “are you? ‘propper into me’?”

miles o'sullivan

"see, i wanna be like that peeta guy, actually," he leans in, a playful arch of his brow as he takes on some kind of deeper voice, maybe it's supposed to be a josh hutcherson impression or something – maybe just something more sinister than his usual cadence, "frankie and i wouldn't have any regrets about love island at all...if it weren't for the baby." he tries not to laugh too hard, because this is all said while she's still tracing the lines of his face, somewhat unfazed but still endeared at the same time. has no idea what she's trying to do, but it's sort of calming to him. he doesn't know how anyone can be so anxious, on the verge of breakdown on this show like he's seen – maybe it's shortsighted, but he can't imagine feeling anything other than as happy and peaceful as he does right now, some resort in spain under a million stars, full attention of the coolest girl he's ever met, probably. "i'd be at the top, huh?" his grin turns cheeky, "you givin' me priority?" he probably shouldn't be such a dick about it, but he can't help himself – she's always feeding his ego in these little ways, ones that are probably inadvertent but they certainly hold his attention. 

"c'mon," miles laughs at her question, his other hand reaching for her other leg now so he can manhandle her a bit, shifting her so she faces him and then he tugs even closer toward him in a singular motion. "what're you doing asking questions that you already know the answer to?" miles says, his left hand reaching up to take hold of frankie's cheek, thumb pressing onto her jaw, tilting her head upward. it's not completely forceful, but it's not gentle either, already gotten the impression that frankie's not someone you treat like glass – he's buzzing with too much desire to be entirely coy about it. gaze can't seem to focus, darting between her lips and her eyes, and miles is starting to think that it's not really about the question at all – maybe she just wants him to prove it. so he does, a split-second, likely impulsive decision to lean-in and close the gap, pressing his lips to hers hungrily.

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

there’s that familiar swell of something between them, like telepathy, or a forcefield. she’s more aware of the places they aren’t touching than the places they are, and shuffles closer to remedy it, knees shifting further into his lap, one arm looping around his shoulders so that her beer bottle rests on the other side of him, against his chest. “the baby?” frankie repeats, eyes round as tea saucers. “shit, dude. you really are all-or-nothing.” her free hand fastens around his wrist, drags it over the swell of her stomach, puffing air down into her diaphragm, imagines a sickly creature there that’s half-hers, half-his. “what are we thinking names-wise? because honestly, i like wendell or gerald, and i’m not prepared to budge on that.���  her skin feels too tight for her skeleton, heat creeping into her cheeks when she looks at him, laughter swelling up in her and spilling from her mouth. the place where she holds his hand to her skin burns like a fire brand. he’s got good hands, capable hands, girthy fingers as miles had so eloquently put it. it wouldn’t take much, just a little encouragement from her, for him to slide his down over her abdomen, sink beneath her skirt, and touch her... she swallows hard, horniness wearing her like a tailor-made coat, and wonders if he can feel the quicken of her pulse in her stomach.

when he grabs her like that, all greedy hands and hungry eyes, there’s a snapping inside of her ; a want that seizes her and sizzles up her spine as she bends beneath his grip, head keeling into his hand where his fingers meet her jaw. fingers abandon her beer to grip instead at the fabric of his shirt like an animal half-starved. she hears the bottle shatter somewhere on the decking, but she’s too drunk on the way he’s looking at her to even care. “did you bring me up here to talk about monster house, or are you gonna fucking kiss me?” in other words, do it, pussy. and he does. it isn’t gentle—miles isn’t gentle—but she’s possessed by the way he touches her, not like she’s something breakable, but like she’s robust, like his hands know how to hold her, could catch any punch she threw his way in a boxing glove but could just as easily caress her with a tenderness that could make her cry. her hands slide up over the planes of his shoulder, fist into his hair, drag themselves down his back, and then she’s swinging her leg over to sit in his lap, sinking down and connecting with something hard. she yelps, tearing herself away. “ow! what the fuck—” it’s a fucking beer bottle. god. something like relief swells up inside of her, spilling out of her in a peal of laughter as she tosses the bottle aside, soaking the cushions with budweiser, hand nursing the spot on her thigh where a bruise will surely be blooming. “oh my god. i thought that was you.” it’s what you get for not looking before you leap—and she had lept, straight into his lap, her desperation palpable when she takes his chin in her hand, guides his lips back to hers, open mouthed and needy when she dips her tongue into his mouth. “hey…” she breathes, drawing away for a second to catch her breath, one hand in his hair, the other sliding down his chest. “if you were a fucked up house trying to kill kids, i’d probably keep living in you, too.” it’s her weird and unsettling way of saying that she likes him. 

miles o'sullivan

there's no doubt in him when he pulls her close, no worry about the what ifs – there's not even any time to think about that, especially with the way she leans upward to meet him so naturally, matching his energy with her own. it's vaguely reminiscent of being around the fire pit yesterday, that same refusal not to do anything by half as she immediately comes closer to him. but it's better than yesterday, no surprise, no jeering in the background. miles has always thought that second kisses are better than first ones anyway, no awkward moment of trying to figure each other out, there's a familiarity about it that's undeniably sexy – and then, of course, there's intention. first kisses have to happen, a necessary evil, and they definitely don't have to be all that good but second kisses . . . well, their likelihood is significantly lower if you're not a fan of the first. but just as he's getting into it, frankie yells and draws back, sounding pained – and gives him a fucking heart attack while she's at it, "shit, i'm sorry, are you –" he has no idea what he's apologizing for, really, but whatever it is, he didn't mean to hurt – then he cracks up laughing upon realization.

"jesus fuckin' christ," he hums, reaching out to brush the sore spot on her thigh with a gentle caress of his thumb. he's about to make a stupid quip about not being that hard yet, but his brain isn't working fast enough right now, thankfully. then she's right back where he wanted her in the first place, pulling him into an open-mouthed and needy kiss that feels like getting completely tangled up in her. he lifts her this time, hands on her ass as he picks her up a bit, pulling her onto his lap properly and hopefully without any collateral damage. he just wants her closer – knowing damn well that while getting to know frankie has been like trying to wrangle a hurricane, he can't help but want to chase her storm. the way she pulls away has him groaning softly, inadvertently . . . honestly a bit pathetically. "hi," he laughs, breathless, as his hands slide up to her waist, thumbs pressing lower. "yeah. i'd chase everyone off your lawn, for sure," he agrees, though it must be incredibly clear already that he likes her, too.

𝐟𝐫𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐜𝐚 𝐜𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨.

breath catches like a skipped record when his thumb circles over that particularly tender spot on her thigh. her head’s against his, skin meeting skin in the press of their foreheads, fingernails trailing over his scalp as her thumb circles the soft spot of skin behind his ear. “no, it’s fine, i’m good. i’m having a good time…” she loves the way they can laugh their way through a kiss. there’s something so warm about hearing miles laugh against her mouth, feeling it shake his diaphragm beneath her hands, and suddenly his hands are all over her—on her hips, on her ass, on her thighs, on her waist—and she’s melting into him like soft butter in a pan, feels her skirt rise up as he draws her closer still, her hips shifting against his hips as a low moan catches in their mouths. god. he’s so fucking cute when she pulls away, grinning stupidly up at her, a groan on his lips like a horny teenager. it's a sound that asks for more ; she can’t help but dip her mouth down to meet the side of his neck, their stupid fucking flirting so juvenile that it’s perfect. this feels like every high school relationship that existed in that sweet invulnerable pocket of youth where you feel invincible, back before any of them had disappointed her. miles makes her feel young, and stupid, and invincible. she wants to take him back to that locker room they spoke about, kiss him against every grimy surface of it, replace a fading memory of shitty person with him and somehow thread him into the narrative of her soccer girl years. feels like she could’ve known him then, anyway, like their lives were running parallel, but a timezone apart.

she trails kisses down his neck, teeth pulling at the skin—she doesn’t leave a mark ; doesn’t want anyone knowing about this moment, because it would take away from them—her mouth eventually carving back across his jaw to find his mouth again. this is better than the first time, because it’s theirs alone. there isn’t a clock counting down the seconds until it becomes too far. she can take her time with him, although admittedly the kiss feels hurried, like they’re existing on borrowed time, both of them handsy and desperate and kind of feral in the way they grab each other closer, can't seem to fill their hands with enough of each other. (one of hers is at his throat, the other at his hip). yesterday, when he’d tackled her, when they were ransacking the villa and idly flirting in the gym, she’d toyed with the idea of this becoming something, but already, she likes him a lot more than she’d originally planned.

[koutarostiddies]

What if...?

Nishinoya and you are best friends and never once questioned anything about your friendship, until a series of questions ended up turning your friendship on it's head. This will be a multi part fic since it got a bit long.

CW: Alcohol, but only mentions of drinking. Just friends kissing.

PT 2.

"What if we kiss?" was asked so matter-of-factly that you almost missed it. Maybe it was because it was said at your graduation party and he was headed out of the country the next day or maybe it was the alcohol talking, but it definitely wasn't a question you expected from your best friend. Then again it was spontaneous enough to have come from him. 

"You should really cut back on the alcohol, Noya."

"Yuu," he tightened his grip on the glass. He wasn't nervous, far from it, he was confident that you'd say yes. He was just a little annoyed that after years, no, nearly two decades of friendship that you still called him Noya.

"What?" You raised your brow. 

"We've been friends for fifteen years, I think it's about time you call me by my given name." You bit your lip knowing he was right, but you never thought it was something that bothered him. You also had to admit that you really loved calling him 'Noya' and 'Nishi'.

"Okay. But back to your earlier question," You traced the rim of the glass you held as you stared at your lap. "Are you sure?"

"Kinda always wanted to do it. Besides I'm leaving tomorrow so why not?"

You hated how carefree he was sometimes. How could he ask you something like that as if he was asking to borrow a pencil, but you had to admit it was an idea you tied with yourself. All the playful flirting never got in the way of your friendship and if it got awkward at least he was leaving the country for a while so time could take care of it. With a drawn out sigh you placed your glass onto the table and looked up at your friend. "Sure. But promise me it won't be weird. Like it won't ruin our friendship." You knew that neither of you could make such a promise. You knew that you just wanted reassurance, no matter how empty. 

"Promise," he held out his pinky and smiled when you hooked yours around it. Before you had a chance to pull away he pulled into his arms and his lips were on yours. Noya never did anything half assed, never went into any situation with caution– he either jumped in head first or not at all and the same went for kissing. His hands cupped your face as he swallowed your moans. The kiss was passionate, one you didn't expect to share with someone you had never thought of in a romantic light. His thumbs caressed your cheeks as your kiss deepened; his tongue gliding alongside yours only setting your body alight. You leaned into it even more as you felt his fingers tickle the nape of your neck. Your fingers clutched his shirt as you started to climb onto his lap and he made no attempt to stop you. Your head was swimming as you lost yourself in the kiss only being pulled out of your haze when you heard someone clearing their throat. 

"Do you guys mind taking this somewhere else?" Tsukki stood near the couch frowning down at you. 

"No, here's just fine." Noya smiled up at him as Tsukishima clenched his jaw before turning on his heels. You couldn't help but laugh as you fell into him. "We probably should get going anyways," Noya kissed your cheek before standing up. "Ready?"

The next day was like any other time when he went overseas. You hugged each other, promising to keep in touch. Just like promised, it didn't get awkward. 

Almost four months later he was back in Japan. You caught each other up on your lives apart. You regaled him with your boring work stories and dating horror stories. His stories, while more exciting, seemed to bore him. 

You headed back to his place and decided to watch your favorite movie together. You felt the couch cushion shift as he moved closer. "Can I kiss you again?" This time his question was more cautious. The kiss was never brought up again,  everything went back to normal– as if nothing ever happened, but that didn't mean he never wanted to do it again. You nodded and soon the movie was forgotten. 

He decided to stay in Japan for a year and you started to spend more time together. The kissing became commonplace, yet somehow you managed to maintain your friendship without any awkwardness. 

Once again it was the day before another overseas departure and again an attempt was made at watching a movie at his place. Said attempt failed as you found your lips locked once more. Noya pulled away, tucking some hair behind your ear. He wanted to say something, you had known him long enough to know his tells. His hand moved down to your neck, his fingertips delicately tracing circles against your soft skin.

"Yuu?"

[waltnut]

Hey!! Do you have any more lore ideas of the demon bros in their level 3/4 states? Your last post was really interesting!! :)

I do have some that’s kinda dark? Maybe even kind of NSFW-ish? I’m not sure how you’d categorize it but here it is anyway.

I’ve had this idea of when the “heat season” comes around and what is needed to be done to protect MC. This is in no way what I think happens EVERY TIME heat season comes around just an idea that I had in my head for a concept. I’ve read many wonderful Headcanons for the heat seasons for the brothers and they are all way more thought out than this lol.

The idea is that for MC’s protection, it has been tasked to keep the brothers locked up in their room or a specific location until the heat has passed. The scenario is that this is the first time MC has been there for it and Barbatos is explaining to them and showing them what is needed to be done. There are seals in every room to keep them from breaking out, for example. The seals are made for that specific demon and do not affect MC or other demons. Most of them are in Level 4 during this time but will phase into Level 3 to try to manipulate MC into letting their guard down. Each demon is given something to keep the desire at bay. If they stop receiving these things they will go into a rage.

Assume they are in Level 4 unless stated. This is specifically the brothers...Read more below.

Lucifer - Locked in his room

Mc is not allowed even on the same floor as Lucifer during this time. It is said his power and influence can affect a large radius and should you get too close, you will feel unconsciously drawn to him or where he is.

There is a seal on his door to keep him in.

You will hear nothing behind his door, it is as if no one is home.

He stalks around in his room in Level 4, with all his lights off. Ashamed of himself and his lack of control.

If he knows MC is close, or if he can no longer resist, he is able to project illusions of this form throughout the house to Lure MC or scare MC into heading closer to him. You would see these out of the corner of your eye, or red eyes in the shadows of a silhouette of a giant goat man.

Should MC enter his room, the seal does not react to humans and opening the door does not break the seal, MC will be stuck in here until it’s over. Have fun dealing with a scary goat demon in the dark.

Music is needed to keep him calm. If no music is played he will use his illusions more to terrorize others on the outside and become violent if approaching his physical form.

Mammon - Locked away in his room, in a secret cellar type room that is accessible only through his room. It’ll

To get to him, there is a door in the back of his room, that only appears for this season, magic or something. It leads down a spiral staircase where the walls are stone and you come to a large stone room that is lit by conches and it’s filled with gold and treasure and the like. It’s a dragon’s den. And it’s separated by a wall of decorative bars keeping MC on one side and the dragon on the other.

The seal is on the bars and touching the bars would repel him. But MC can touch them and stick a hand through.

He lays on his treasure and gold objects which will stick to his leathery parts on his wings and the underside of his tail and belly.

Nests of treasures, tapestry and fancy rugs are also used as paddings for his nests. There are items from ancient times, which you could only assume he’s had for centuries and his hoard has only grown since then.

If MC enters this chamber he will transform to level 3 and offer his treasures to them. He will also pout and guilt to keep MC there with him.

Treasure is given to him every hour to keep him happy. He transforms back into level 4 in a fit and will destroy his piles of treasures out of anger and upset if they choose to leave him.

If MC chooses to stay, he will dress them in his treasures and make nests for them.

Leviathan - Sealed in his large aquarium tank. Did you think it was built for the fishes?

The only light source comes from the fish tank and TVs. You can see a giant dark mass inside the tank wrapping around everything inside. It has pulsating glowing orange orbs on its form.

There are Tv’s set up in front of the glass. A lot of them. All of them are anime. There are also a lot of plushies floating in the water. To keep him company, Barbatos would say. These objects keep him calm.

If MC approaches he will turn into Level 3 and press himself against the glass with the most sad eyes. He will use words to manipulate MC into feeling guilty for him being alone and to stay there with him and watch all the shows.

If you stay too long in this room you will hear an eerie whale type song in the back of your mind. It seems to make you dizzy and makes you want to stay with him. Maybe you just might jump in the water. Who needs to breathe anyway? He probably has a solution for that.

If MC chooses to leave he will turn back into Level 4 sea monster and wail the saddest deep sea song and slam his huge body against the glass. Hopefully it stays in tact.

Satan - Locked in his room.

A green glowing wall seal separates the door area from the rest of his room. It has a shimmering flame affect but you can see through it.

His room is trashed. Books ripped to shreds, book cases fallen over, small flecks of green flame and ash are scattered on the piles.

He remains in Level 4 even if MC is in the room. And he is not nice. He is mean. He will scream and yell and swear profanities at them, and especially Barbatos since Barbatos will not let Mc go alone. He will say down right terrible things out of anger and frustration.

If MC expresses any type of upset, it’s possible Satan might notice. If he does, he will lower his voice and approach. He will apologize and begin to try to convince Mc to stay with him and read all the books.

If he is refused he will slam on the sealed wall furiously and monstrous screaming continues. His flames in his body are strong and bright.

Books are given to him every half hour as well as audiobooks of plays from every language to keep him calm.

Asmodeus - Sealed in his room, but an altered version of reality.

His room is separated by a clear glass wall with an invisible seal. On the other side there are mirrors everywhere. It’s like a fun house with how they are not in any uniform pattern. Some are cracked and broken.

There is pillows and blankets and a giant bed where there isn’t mirrors.

The mirrors are used to keep his morale low, showing his reflection in his level 4 state causes a depression to keep him from wanting to pursue others, as he is the avatar of Lust and is the most insatiable during this season.

If MC is in the room, he will actually scream and refuse for them to see him. If MC can convince for Asmodeus to show himself, he will come close to the glass barrier and black tear lines would be streaming down his face.

He will show himself in Level 3 to them to convince MC to stay and keep him company. Something about wanting to see them from every angle with all these mirrors?

If refused he will start to break the mirrors around him. The magically repair themselves eventually.

Other demons like succubi/incubi are sent to him to keep his appetite lower. But he will always prefer MC over them.

Beelzebub - Locked in a giant meat freezer storage near the kitchen.

It’s very cold in here, and there are animal carcasses hanging from meat hooks everywhere. Even things you never seen before. It’s a large cold room with tile.

Bars separate you from the monster in the middle of the room. He sits on a pile of meat and flesh, sounds of tearing can be heard. But also the raffling of chains. The bars are not enough to hold him. There are seals on the bars and metal cuffs attached to his wrists and ankles.

Steam can be seen coming off the monster form Beelzebub.

Once MC enters, he will come launch himself towards them but the chains catch him and hold him away. Barbatos will allow MC to throw him some meat but to use a rod to stick it through, like some zoo keeper feeding a lion.

It was said they didn’t start using the chains until one time he broke out and went on a feeding spree. I won’t get into details about that.

He speaks in very few words. “Closer.” Or “Stay.” are usually what he’ll snort at MC. He stares at them, licking his lips. You don’t know if it’s lust or hunger or both.

He doesn’t put up much a fuss if MC leaves, as the food is enough to occupy him.

Food fed to him by the hundreds is needed to keep him from raging.

Belphegor - Locked back up in the attic.

There is a wall of black smoke/fog that hides the rest of the room. It has light flecks off white in them, like stars.

Red eyes stare at you from inside the fog. They disappear and reappear somewhere else.

Barbatos tells you to not touch the smoke. Do not. Ever. Touch the smoke.

Level 3 arms of Belphie can reach out from the smoke to grab you.

His voice is soft and sweet but his words are not. He tells you he is always with you when you sleep. He can see your dreams. He is in them. It’s the way he says these things that are unsettling.

He can disperse the fog enough to show himself to you. He can change the fog to look like space and galaxies to entice MC to want to stay and experience it.

He will guilt trip MC, saying they’re the reason he’s here and they owe him. They need to make it up to him. He can forgive them if they stay.

If he is refused, a wave of tiredness will wash over MC. Barbatos must always accompany them and he is able to take them away before anything happens.

Incense smoke is needed to keep him calm and sedated.

Now you may be thinking...What about Barbatos?? Isn’t he affected by the season?? To that he replies...

“Oh yes, but my constitution is much stronger than the rest.”

Then perhaps you may be wondering about Lord Diavolo. To which he replies...

“It’s best you don’t set foot in the castle. Better yet, just stay in here in the house, where it’s much safer.”

[forever-rogue]

if you’re still taking requests for Bucky, can you do one from this quote if it sparks any inspiration: ‘when you realize you can tell someone your truth, when you can stand in front of them and show yourself and their response is “you’re safe with me” - that’s intimacy.’

A/N: please, this is so soft 🥺

Pairing: Bucky x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Warnings: none

MASTERLIST

»»————-　♡　————-««

A heavy sigh escaped soft lips as Bucky laid on the couch and stared at the ceiling. There was almost no sound in the room besides the rhythmic ticking of the aging clock on the wall, combined with the sounds wafting in from the open window, and the almost non-existent humming of his vibranium appendage. He reached his hand up to his chest to ground himself by touching the dog tags that had been his for way too many years now. A temporary moment of panic set into his bones when he realized there was nothing there, but revelation quickly dawned on him as he remembered that they were currently with you. The last he’d seen them, you were wearing them, the metallic silver tags safely nestled under the soft fabric of your t-shirt.

When he’d given them to you, a sign of his desire to call you his, among other things, he never actually expected that you’d wear them. The first time he’d spied you wearing them, along a casual outfit consisting of jeans and a t-shirt and sneakers, he’d almost short circuited. There was something about comforting knowing they were safe and sound in your possession now. They were yours now too - just like he was.

A gentle tugging lifted the corners of his mouth into the semblance of a smile. How foreign it still felt sometimes, the gentle feeling of blossoming happiness and knowing he was loved. Loved. What a strange and odd concept that was. He couldn’t remember the last another soul had told him they loved him besides in the most platonic sense. But the first time you’d whispered those words to him, so effortlessly, so easily, I love you, his whole world came to a screeching halt and he was sent into a wild spiral that left him speechless. Bucky hadn’t reciprocated your words then; but it wasn’t long after that he did. It had been a half shout, half declaration as you just grinned at him, pulling him against your lips and only letting him go when you were both breathless and dizzy.

He relaxed at the thought, settling against the pillow as he reminded himself to swim in happy memories, rather than drown in the ghosts of the past.

His phone vibrated against the glass top of the coffee table as it startled him out of his stupor, causing him to almost roll off the couch in surprise. He scrambled to grab the phone, and relaxed when he saw your name on the screen. Straightening himself up, he cleared his throat before answering, “hi sweetheart.”

“Bucky!” your excited voice on the other end of the line made his heart relax as he just imagined you bouncing around your small floral shop, making sure everything was perfect, “it’s about time you answered, old man. I’ve called you like three times! Did I disturb your afternoon nap, Barnes?”

“Hey, watch who you’re calling an old man,” he snorted as he stood up and stretched, surprised by how easily you were able to read him, “I got decades on you, kid, respect your elders.”

“Respect me when I’m right,” you grinned as he laughed lightly. How easily everything seemed to flow between the two of you; he’d never thought he could have anything like this again. Even once he’d left Wakanda and life slowly went back to a semblance of normality after the Blip, he still had a hard time trusting people; perhaps, more than anything else, he didn’t trust himself.

While he knew he was himself again, Bucky, and not the Winter Soldier, he still was never quite convinced that he wouldn’t ever go back. For so long he had been nothing but a killer, it was hard to believe that he could ever be fully himself again. So he’d closed himself off, steeled himself, despite the constant reassurance from the people around him that it was okay to let others in. He couldn’t trust himself - after so long...how could he? How was he just supposed to be able to pick the pieces and just be James again?

But he was learning, over time, slowly, bit by bit, that it was okay to let people in, okay to feel, and be okay and also not be okay. Sure, some days were hard, but the good days were good. And they were getting to become more and more frequent.

“Bucky? Hello?” you called his name from the other line, trying to get him to snap back into attention, “James? James Buchanan Barnes?”

“S-sorry,” his voice was soft and gentle for a moment, “I...yeah.”

“Yeah,” you teased softly, “zoning out again huh, my love? I know how you get. What are you thinking about, Bucky?”

“Nothing much,” he admitted, shrugging to himself despite the fact that you weren’t able to see him, “when are you off?”

“Whenever I want to be,” you reminded him, “I’m the boss now, remember? Why do you ask? Got some grand plans for us?”

“Nah,” he confessed, “just want to come and see you. Is it okay if I stop in? I’d come and bring you some flowers...but that would seem a little...on the nose.”

“Ahh, look at you,” he could practically hear you grinning, “very clever, aren’t you? Come and see me - it’s been slow so I might as well close up when you get here. Maybe we can go for a walk and get dinner?”

“Sounds great,” he agreed softly, “see you soon.”

“See you soon, Bucky.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

While you waited for Bucky to arrive, a brilliant idea popped into your head. You quickly grabbed a vase and started to gather some of the flowers that reminded you of him. It wasn’t long before you had a variety of them, neatly arranged and topped off with a bow, ready and waiting for him. He walked into your small shop, ready to announce himself but quickly found that he didn’t have to.You were perched up on the counter, swinging your legs back and forth as you tilted your head to the side and studied him with a small smile. He was dressed casually today, sporting a dark blue henley and a pair of well fitting jeans. His arm, intricate and beautifully designed golden and black vibranium, wasn’t on full display, nor was it completely hidden. Progress; a step in the right direction, albeit small. He’d get there when he’d get there and if that took another five years or fifty, you planned on being there for him.

“Hi James,” you popped off the counter and met him halfway, letting him wrap you up and envelope you in his warm, tight grasp. His arms, his body, was your favorite place to be. You never felt more safe and secure than when you were wrapped up in him, “I’ve missed you.”

“Missed me?” he chuckled as you just nodded, pouting lightly as he couldn’t help but kiss you softly, “it’s only been a few hours since we’ve seen each other.”

“I know,” you ran a hand through his dark hair, “but it doesn’t mean I can’t miss you, does it?”

“I suppose you’re right,” he agreed as you took his hand and pulled him over to the counter. Bucky dramatically rolled his eyes as he trailed after you. Your hand looked so small in his hand; delicate skin contrasted against harsh callouses as you gave him a squeeze of reassurance. Whatever hesitation or tension was left in his body seeped, replaced by a feeling of saccharine bliss, “what are you up to?”

“You always think I’m up to something,” standing in front of the flowers, you paused, studying his features before reaching up to tenderly cradle his face in your hands. Bucky, resilient and strong, turned into a puddle of mush and practical whimpers as you traced a delicate fingertip across his features, “perhaps this time you’re right.”

“Tell me then,” he turned his face, pressing a gentle kiss to your palm as you used your free hand to reach behind you and push the vase to your side so he could see the ornate display. Blue eyes narrowed, highlighting the wary crease in his brow before they widened, softening all the way through. His hand slinked down to your waist, a light squeeze followed as he shuffled to the side and studied the flowers. Bright yellows and oranges, brilliant crimsons and pinks, and mellow pastels were suddenly under his intense scrutiny as he took in the sight of the blossoms, “w-what are these?”

“And here I was, thinking you were smart,” standing behind him, you wrapped your arms around his waist, delicately and slowly at first so you wouldn’t startle him. His frame stiffened for a mere moment before he relaxed, the weight of your head on his back a welcome burden he was happy to bear, “these are called flowers.”

“Very funny,” you could feel the laugh vibrate through his chest as a hand, one colder and more metallic than normal, but still all him, settled on your own. Pressing a line of soft kisses to his shoulders, you listened to the steady beating of his heart, “what’s the occasion?”

“There is none,” you insisted, “I just thought you would enjoy them. Look at the colors and blossoms, they all reminded me of you. So brilliant and warm and bright and lovely - just like you, Bucky.”

A few beats of silence met your ears as he inhaled and exhaled deeply, a million thoughts swirling around his mind. Before you could speak or say anything else, he turned around in your arms so he was facing you. He gestured between you and the flowers for a few moments, finding himself at a loss for words, “me?”

“Yes,” you promised him, “for you. Do you like them?”

“I love them,” he reassured you, an easy warmth settling over you, “back in the day I would have been doing this for you…”

‘You’ve gotten me flowers plenty of times,” you laughed, a sound that had easily become his favorite thing in almost no time, “besides, you deserve some nice things too.”

“I’ve been thinking…”

“That’s a new one,” you teased as he jokingly groaned, “ I jest! I’ve noticed you’ve been a little more quiet and stoic lately...I didn’t even know that was possible for you. What’s been on your mind, my love?”

“There’s this quote that came into mind...I heard it somewhere, but I can’t remember from what or who,” he mused as he rubbed thoughtfully at his chin, “it’s something along the lines of ‘when you realize you can tell someone your truth, when you can stand in front of them and show yourself and their response is “you’re safe with me” - that’s intimacy.’ I feel like...I can do that with you - like I can be myself and you’re not judging me, even though you know who I am.”

“Bucky - James - I know who you are,” it was surprising you didn’t melt into a puddle then and there, melting into nothingness at his feet. You leaned in, looking at his eyes for a few moments before capturing his lips in a soft kiss. You broke apart slowly, reluctantly before resting your forehead against his, “I know exactly you who are. And I love you for it - a good man, friend, partner, and so many other things. You are good, and it doesn’t matter what anyone else says or thinks. Fuck them - the people that know you know who you really are.”

“Even after…”

“Even after everything that’s happened,” you promised, “you are safe with me. I’m not going to suddenly turn my back on you and walk away. I love you, Bucky. You have me, now and forever, and I’ve got you, always. That’s not going to change. You know that, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” you could feel him smiling against your lips as he breathed you in and let you overwhelm his senses, “I know that.”

“Good,” you smiled as you reached for his hand, “let’s go to get dinner. I’m starving.”

“Don’t you need to close up?”

“Nah,” you winked at him, “I closed up as soon as we got off the phone earlier so we would have interruptions. C’mon Buck, I’m going to take you for a night on the town! What do you say?”

“Sounds perfect,” he agreed, “there’s just one more thing.”

“Hmm?”

“This,” he pulled you into his arms and kissed you deeply as your body melded into his, “I love you too.”

»»————-　♡　————-««

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[theonewiththefanfics]

Tomato - Tomato (one-shot)

Synopsis: One is an international rock-star. The other is his loyal assistant. Both are complete morons in love. Also - she’s allergic to tomatoes, and it is important.

This started off as something completely else. hope you enjoy :D

Pairing: Harry Styles x fem!Assistant!Reader

Genre: fluff, minor angst

Warnings: two idiots pining for one another, swearing, mentions of allergies and EpiPens

Word count: 3492

Being an assistant to someone famous wasn’t all glamourous parties and wild nights out with celebrities. It was scheduling last minute flights and not sleeping for three days straight as you packed a million bags and then repacked because their stylist sent you knew pieces and the old ones no longer fit the aesthetic of the week.           It was also making sure that they were up by six AM with a hot coffee at their bedside ready to help them wake up as you lay out a detailed plan of the day down to the minute, while you yourself basically only had a two-hour nap because you had to finish off 568 handwritten notes to be sent out to each of the contacts in their phone. Or at least that’s what Y/N’s life was like being the personal assistant to none other than the modern-day prince of rock Harry Styles.            Said rockstar was actually still asleep when Y/N entered his room, ripping open the curtains and letting in the rising sun. He groaned, pulling up the bedsheets that’d ridden down his form during the night. “Not that I don’t like seeing your gorgeous face in the mornings….” he mumbled into the covers. “But I don’t like seeing your face in the mornings when they start at six bloody AM.”           Y/N snorted and rolled her eyes, rubbing them in an attempt to get rid of the sleep that still lingered in her own body. “You were the one that said you’re fine with seeing Lambert at eight for a fitting.”           “When did I say that?” Harry scoffed, only the top of his messy bedhead seen from the cocoon he’d built around himself.           “Would you like me to pull up the text messages, the calendar or the e-mails?”           Even with her back turned as she rummaged through his closet for him to put on some clothes, she could sense the middle finger he threw at her, and she smiled.           Despite everything, despite the zero sleep and stress always coursing through her veins, Y/N loved working for him. He treated her as a friend, not just some lackey he paid to, but most importantly, comparatively to the other people she’d worked for in the same line of business – he treated her as a human.           If something went over the deadline, Harry didn’t scream or yell at her and tell Y/N how incompetent she was, instead he asked what kind of help or assistance she needed to get the job done, or maybe if she just needed some time off to gather herself and look at the problem with fresh eyes.           “I hate how organised you are,” Harry groaned, finally throwing the covers off.           “If I wasn’t, you’d be in a ditch somewhere.”           She heard him scoff and two feet plop against the hardwood floor as he made his way towards her. “Is that how little faith you have in me?”           “You don’t even know what day it is!”           “Who does in these times?”           Y/N shrugged her shoulders and handed him a pair of boxers, some loose jeans, and a flowery Hawaiian shirt. “Are you telling me I’m wrong though?”           She looked over to her side, a smirk playing on her lips while he squinted his green eyes at her. “No, but it doesn’t mean I like getting called out, especially this early in the morning.”

          With a roll of her eyes and a shove at his shoulder for him to move to the bathroom, Y/N handed him the clothes, moving downstairs to start making him some light breakfast and get herself a cold glass of water.           You see, she’d been working as his assistant for close to two years, and they’d grown not only as people around one another, challenging their beliefs and world views, but as friends too. And, well, Y/N would be lying if the emotions hadn’t evolved from platonic to falling in love. Not that she’d ever admit it. He was an international sensation, and she was the girl who got him vegetarian croissants at the airport.           She dragged a hand down her face as she clicked the stove on and took out a carton of eggs from the fridge. Y/N knew how he liked his omelette to the T, mostly because when she’d spent the first night of quarantine with him a year prior right as the pandemic had started, Harry had wanted to do something nice because she couldn’t go and see her family any more, so he’d gotten up at seven to make breakfast for both of them. The only problem was, he hadn’t asked if she had any allergies, so as he added bits of tomatoes, parsley, cheese and scallions, Harry hadn’t expected Y/N’s eyes to go wide at the first bite as she dropped the fork.           “Harry…” Her tone had been cautious. “What’s in this?”           He was sweating. Was his cooking really that bad? He just wanted to do something nice and there he was screwing everything up. “ ‘S just some of my favourite things. I’m sorry I didn’t ask, I just thought you’d like it.”            “I do, but this tastes like it has tomatoes in it.”           He nodded. “Yeah. It does.”           Gently she smiled at him and pushed the plate a bit further away. “Could you grab me a coat, and if you have any – an EpiPen?”           “An Epi – oh shit!” When the realisation hit him, Harry was jumping out of his seat, running to one of the cupboards and rummaging through in a panic all the while apologies flew non-stop from his mouth.           Y/N in the meantime had gathered her purse and mask, making a call to the nearest hospital to explain the situation to which they responded they’d be waiting for her arrival.           “I’m so sorry!” Harry ran up to her, a first-aid kit in his shaking hands. “Please don’t die! I didn’t want to kill you, I promise! I just wanted to make you some breakfast cause you do so much for me, and now you’re stuck here, and – oh god,” he cried. “I’m going to be prosecuted for killing my assistant.”           She didn’t mean to, but the snort came out of her nose either way. “Harry.” She put a hand on his shoulder. “Please calm down. I’m not going to die.”           “You’re allergic!”           “Yes, I am, but I only had a small bite. The ER is just a precaution.” Y/N took his palms in hers and squeezed them. “Now take a deep breath with me…” They did so, holding it for five seconds and letting it out for eight. “And calm down a bit. I’ll go give myself the shot, and then I’ll drive to the hospital.”           “Let me,” Harry begged. “Please, let me at least drive you to the emergency room. God, I almost killed you with an omelette, it’s the least I can do. I – I could also help you with the shot, I won’t hit an artery, I promise -”           “Harry, you’re barely coherent. Not to say anything, but you’d have a bigger chance of killing me in a car crash, than from that tomato.” Y/N gave him a smile. “I’m gonna be fine.”           With that, she left him to venture into the bathroom and did the unpleasant part of stabbing herself in the thigh to alleviate her body from the allergy symptoms. She sat there for around five minutes before she felt that the swelling of her tongue and itching in her throat was starting to subside, which meant the epinephrine was working.           “Okay,” she huffed, taking her purse from the couch where Harry had been sitting, hugging the accessory. “I’ll be back in probably around two hours. Do we need anything from the store?”           He shook his head. “Just come back home, please.”           Y/N would never admit how her heart thundered in her chest when Harry said to come back ‘home’. “I will.” She promised. “Don’t you worry. You’re not getting rid of me that easy, Styles. The money’s too good.” She winked at him and then left Harry pouting on the couch, but she couldn’t get through the door, before he jumped up, yelling, “wait! Do I need to get rid of every tomato in the house?”           “No,” she laughed. “I’m good to be around them. Even touch them. ‘S just my insides that don’t agree with it when they meet.”           “Okay.” He nodded, hands on his hips. “Alright. I’ll uh – I’ll be waiting. I’ll make you something else.”           “There’s no need for that, Harry.”           His eyes widened at her words. “I swear I’m not trying to murder you!”           “Oh my god,” she muttered shaking her head. “Just – just relax. Okay. I’ll send you hourly updates.”           He bit his lip. “Make it every ten minutes.”           “Harry –,”           “Please?” The way he was giving her puppy dog eyes melted her heart.           With an eye-roll, Y/N waved at him and promised to update her boss at every possible moment and confirm that he hadn’t, in fact, been the reason for her demise. Well, he was the reason for the demise of her low standards in men, having taken them and thrown them up to the Moon, but unless her feelings were miraculously requited or if one of the Marvel characters, she was obsessed with came to life, she’d have to stick to what was available. And in her mind, that wasn’t Harry.           “What are you thinking about?” His voice startled Y/N out of the memory, and she shook her head, adding salt and pepper to the beaten eggs.           She shrugged. “Just about that time a year ago where you secretly tried to off me because you were too nice to say you didn’t wanna quarantine together.”           The groan he let out was of royal embarrassment, and it put a wide smile on her face, as she took one of the forsaken fruits and started to chop the red ball into small pieces.           “You’ll never let me live it down, are you?”           Y/N raised her eyebrow at him. “Your failed murder attempt?” She snorted. “Of course not! It’s like you don’t watch the crime shows and murder documentaries when I have them on. You really haven’t learned anything.”           Harry stuck his tongue out at her and moved to her side, dropping some chives into the mix as well. “Well given how it wasn’t a murder attempt, I wouldn’t consider it a fail.”           Her hip bumped his, and only then did Y/N really give him a once-over. As always, he looked amazing in whatever was on his body, but what made him even cuter in her eyes was the sleepiness still lingering in him.           Harry’s movements were a little bit sluggish, eyes half-closed and small sighs passing his lips as he sipped onto the coffee she’d come to his place with. The shirt sat loosely on his body, the first two buttons left open while he’d tucked the bottom of it into the jeans, having found a Gucci belt and cinched it around his waist, giving it a more eighties look rather than the sixties vibe he usually had with his suits.           The brown hair was still messy and dishevelled, and Y/N could barely, just barely restrain herself from running her fingers through it, but what she didn’t know Harry was struggling just as much.           All he wanted to do was pull out the bottom lip Y/N had gotten in between her teeth and kiss her senseless, to have her fingers dig into his arms and leave crescent shaped imprints on his skin.           “So, uh…” He had to start a conversation otherwise his mouth would find itself on Y/N’s mouth in a second. “What’s Lambert got in his schedule? How many outfits is he thinking?”           “Two or three, I think,” she said, pouring the mixture on the pan and letting the slow sizzle erupt around them. “He’s got this one suit which I think you’ll really like – all leather, but it needs to be altered.”           Harry hummed, and for a second both of them relished in the domestic feel of it all. They’d had many moments like it before, especially during the spring and summer seasons of 2020, and Y/N couldn’t help but relish in her memories at them.           “Harry?” It was like her voice snapped him out from a trance. “Could you pass me a plate please?’           “Uh, yeah,” he stammered for a moment and then nodded, wordlessly going to a cupboard and taking out a white marbled plate. That single piece of kitchenware probably cost more than her life insurance, but it was definitely aesthetic if nothing else.           Silently Y/N plopped the omelette onto the plate, placing it on the kitchen counter and went to get him a fork, however when she turned around, he was facing her, chewing quite agressively on the inside of his cheek.           “You okay?” she asked, coming closer. “I can call Lambert, reschedule it for later. He wouldn’t be too happy about having to wake up and then – “           But Harry shook his head. “It’s not that.”           “Then what?”           He didn’t say anything. It was like he was trying to decipher the best course of action, and when he ultimately did, Y/N was pressed up against the counter, Harry’s forehead against hers with two ring-clad hands cupping her cheeks.           “Harry,” she breathed, out her lips brushing his making the air in her lungs hitch. “What are you doing?”           “Something I’ve been dying to do for a year now. If you let me that is.”           “I -,” The words were muddled up in her head. Of course, Y/N wanted him to kiss her, she wanted him to ravish every part of her body. The fantasies and dreams she’d had at night would be incriminating proof if her feelings were on trial, but despite it all, her brain was usually in charge and would overrule any decision made by her heart. “Harry, we can’t.” She whispered, voice breaking.           “I -,” Horror morphed onto his features as he took a step back. “Did I misread the signals? Did I do something you don’t wan –“           “No.” She grabbed onto his cheeks, trying to calm him down, his body practically melting into hers. “I do.” She didn’t need to explain what she meant. He understood. “So much it hurts me sometimes… but Harry, you’re my boss. My employer. It… it wouldn’t be right.”           “Why? How can it not be right, when it feels like the rightest thing in the world?”           “Because, Harry,” she huffed. “You’re my boss. And what’s worse – I love working for you!”           That made both of them laugh, the tone of her voice as if she was more annoyed than anything else. “ ‘Nd why’s that bad?” He nudged her nose with his. “I’d hope my employees like working with me. What kind of a person would I be if I thrived on them being miserable?”           “Because if I didn’t, quitting would be easy.” She raised her eyebrow at him. “And if I quit there’d be nothing stopping us from dating.”           Harry bit his lip, finger trailing along her cheekbone. “There’s nothing stopping us now either. There is no clause in your contract that says you can’t date people who you work for or with. Sarah’s with Mitch, and they’re the happiest they’ve ever been. They’re even having a baby…”           Y/N gave him a sympathetic smile. “I know. But that’s different. They’re on equal levels. You and I, however… I don’t want people to think I got my job because I slept with you, or some shit. It’s bad enough some already do so.”           His brows furrowed, and Y/N saw how his jaw clenched. “Who?”           “Strangers.” She shrugged. “I know you don’t look at comments like that online, but I see them. My DMs are filled with that. Gossip magazines. The point is – there are already unsubstantiated rumours about us. This would give them the confirmation they’d need.”           “How can it confirm something that’s not true?”           “There are still people who believe vaccines cause autism. Even when their ‘proof’ has been discredited and shown to be just complete bullshit, most don’t like to admit they’re wrong, so they’ll look for whatever tells them they’re right.”           Harry huffed throwing his head back to look at the ceiling. “So, where does that leave us? In love, but without being able to do anything about it? Because I can’t.” He shook his head. “I won’t be able to just pass you by without kissing you, or not pull you into the bed when you wake me up, or press you against the wall and not have my head between these two gorgeous legs.”           Y/N groaned slapping his chest and dropping her forehead against his peck. “That is so unfair. Why do you have to tease me like that!”           “Oh, sweetheart.” The rumble was deep and shot a wave of heat straight to her core. “This is no teasing.” The smirk on his face when she looked up at him was shit-eating. “Trust me, if I was teasing, you’d be begging for me.”           She’d imagined him between her thighs more times than it was appropriate considering he was her boss, but hot damn, did it feel amazing when his lips crashed onto hers, and she let him. In her dreams, his lips hadn’t been just pressed to her mouth but other places which were more south, but it was still one of the best feelings in the world.           The kiss left them both breathless, and grinning and satisfied, yet begging for more, teeth nipping at the soft flesh.           “I’ll put out an official statement, if you want,” Harry muttered against her mouth, unable to stop pecking her lips now that’d he’d gotten a taste. “But please, please, please… for both our sanities go out on a date with me.”           It seemed like Y/N was the one contemplating the best plan of action now when her brows furrowed and she looked up at him, pressing and unpressing her lips, as the swelling from the kiss grew. “Did you by any chance have a piece of that omelette already?” She had a suspicion it wasn’t just from the kiss.           His eyes widened, and then his head dropped to her shoulder. “Not again!”           Y/N rolled her eyes lifting his face by the chin so he would look at her. “How about EpiPen first?”           “Fair enough,” Harry grumbled unlatching himself from her and going for his keys and wallet, already preparing for the short drive they’d have to take. “But then a date?”           She raised her eyebrow, taking out the box Harry now kept under the sink with at least three EpiPen’s for emergencies. “In a hospital?”           “We could be going dumpster diving for all I care, and I’d count it as a date.”           Y/N rolled her eyes. “You’ll have to do so much better than that; you’ve almost put me in anaphylactic shock twice. Now come on.” She motioned with her head towards the bathroom. “Stab me and take me to the ER.”           “Fucking tomatoes,” Harry grumbled, taking her by the hand and not letting it go even for the short walk.           “Tomato-tomato, you’re the one that kissed me.”           “That I don’t regret.”           Y/N smiled, turning towards him, and taking him by the nape of his neck pulled Harry down for one more kiss, groaning at the feeling of his tongue dancing against hers.           “Y/N!” He pulled back with a gasp, shock on his face.           She just shrugged her shoulders. “We’re already going to see the doctors anyway.”           Harry pushed her shoulder and made her sit down onto the toilet. “Take your pants off before my kisses kill you.”           “Yes, daddy.” Y/N wiggled her eyebrows as Harry moaned, squeezing her calf.            His eyes were dark as he looked up at her. “Next time this happens, you’ll be begging me.”           Her wicked smile was so full of happiness he couldn’t help the one that grew on his face. “I’ll be keeping you to it. Now, dear sir.” She handed him the EpiPen. “Hit me with your best shot.”           And although it’d been now two times in their lives where Harry trying to do something good and make the other feel just as good had done pretty much the opposite, when they got to the emergency room, their smiles could be felt even under their masks           Harry watched with blushing cheeks as Y/N explained the situation to the nurse, especially when one of them threw him an unsavoury glance, eyebrow raised high as if saying ‘again? One time wasn’t enough?’.           “No more tomatoes.” He promised. “And also - it wasn’t on purpose!”           Y/N squeezed his palm, chuckling. She may not be able to give a shot at eating a tomato, but she sure as hell was going to give Harry one. After all, she had almost died for the man. Twice.

Tags (crossed out wouldn’t take):

Harry Styles tags: @breezykpop​ @girlboss99​ @harrystylesdoesntknowiexist​ @alliyjane​ @sirtommyholland​ @raylovessarcasm @just-here-to-escape-from-reality @harryhub​

Everything tags: @lumelgy @palaiasaurus64 @supernaturalbaesduh @breezy1415 @crazy--me @thatawkwardlittlefangirl @sea040561 @staryeyedgirl @deathbyarabbit @s-c-a-r-e-d-po-t-t-e-r @reblogger-not-a-blogger @m-a-t-91 @dalilx @i-need-a-hero-i-need-a-loki @maladaptive-ninja-returns @averyrogers83 @in-the-end-im-still-trash @gallifreyansass @dewy-biitch @avxgers @unlikelygalaxygiver @magicwithaknife​ @ollyoxenfrees​ @bnhvrdy​ @tvwhoresblog @celebsimagines @thatkindofgurl​ @sj-thefan​ @teenwolflover28 @lestersglitterglue​ @im-squished​

A/N: I’m at work and I wanted to write a bit for my book, but hahahahahahaha I can’t stop procrastinating. Also, this was something comepletely else centered around Christmas, then New Year and the Valentines, but I just couldn’t and it morphed into this. Maybe this Holiday season when it rolls around I’ll post it :D

P.S. if anyone’s had a septoplasty (repositioning of the septum) - how was it? how painful is it? kinda starting my journey towards it cause apparently I can’t breathe out of my left nostril, but I’m kinda scared ngl. I’ve read some horror stories about having holes and pieces of the cartilage fall out afterwards :/// 

P.S.S. what did ya think? my tags are always open, just drop a message if you wanna be added :)

P.S.S.S please don’t plagiarise or repost my work on other platforms (wattpad, AO3 etc)

[dollslayer]

The Stand-In

CEO!Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Stood up by your date and stranded in one of the nicest restaurants in town, Bucky Barnes just can't let that stand.

Warnings: slight angst, smut, oral (m & f receiving), deepthroating, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it !), if I missed anything let me know!

W/C: 3,807

A/N: I wrote this for @simsadventures 6k mixed adventure challenge (Congrats!) w/ a restaurant setting and the line "If you could just hold my hand and be quiet, that would be nice". If you like it please reblog and comment and tell me what you think! Cheers!

p.s. - Come check out my other fics or find me on AO3 (same name)!

Main Masterlist

7 PM

Your best Jimmy Choos click gingerly as you walk up to the hostess stand at one of the most popular restaurants in Manhattan. He had made the reservation in your name, which you gave to the hostess. She takes a minute to consider you, cocking a brow as she silently clocks your ASOS cocktail dress. You looked chic enough that she could forgive you. Her moment wasn’t lost on you, this part of the Upper West Side was so stuffy so you put on your best.

Feeling slightly self-conscious about your attire you brushed the feeling off quickly. He would be here soon and he’d reassure you how beautiful you look. When you’d met for coffee he’d make you feel so sexy and confident with how sure of himself he was. So when he asked you to dinner at one of the most renowned places in the city and said he wanted to talk tonight you accepted immediately.

“Right this way” the hostess said and broke you out of your self-doubting stupor and guided you towards a some-what secluded table towards the back of the restaurant.

“Here are some menus for you two, if you’d like anything to drink while you wait, your waiter should be here soon”, she sent you an artificial smile and turned on her heel back to the stand.

You picked up a menu and it left you reeling at the prices. You had half a mind to text him and see if he wanted to go somewhere else. Based off of the way he dresses and how he had tipped the barista on your first outing you thought better of it. He’d said he wanted to treat you, so you’ll let him.

7:15 PM

You decided to wait to order anything to drink until he got here, too afraid of the price tag attached to any bottle of wine on the menu.

You took a sip of your water and checked your texts for the second time since sitting down. Still nothing, you didn’t want to text him just yet, you knew he was busy and you didn’t want to seem overbearing. You knew he was a CFO and he’d be coming from the financial district when traffic was insane. You could forgive him. You take another sip of your water hoping it’ll wash all of your doubts away. Besides, it’s not like he’s late-late, he’s like, fashionably late, he’s working-man late.

7:30 PM

Okay, so he’s late-late, don’t panic. Sometimes things happen, he’s only human and this is only your second date.

Your waiter approaches the table again, eyebrows raised expectantly at you. The smug look on his face says he’s thinking what you’re too afraid to.

You order yourself a $25 martini. Your waiter promises to return and you finish off your water.

Time to craft the perfect text that says ‘Hey I’m here, where tf are you?’ without actually asking where the fuck he’s at. You tap away nervously on your phone.

‘Hey, I’ve got a table towards the back, closer to the end of the bar’ Perfect.

7:45 PM

You’re still sitting solo at the table, you feel the beginnings of humiliation creep into your features. You feel warm, your brows form a seemingly permanent crease of worry, and you are trying everything in your power to suppress the tears you felt building up.

You don’t make eye contact with your waiter when he stops by again, playing it off like you were sending a text. But you tell him you’ll be right back so that he doesn’t give up your table.

You walk quickly to the bathroom hoping no one will notice your trembling face. You feel just like a middle schooler that got dumped at the dance. You make it to a bathroom stool and dial your best friend, Wanda.

“Is everything okay? You’re supposed to be out with your mystery date aren’t you?” She had answered almost immediately.

You sniffled a bit and took a shaky inhale. “Y-yes, our reservation was for 7 and he put it in my name, I texted him once already but I don’t wanna seem too overbearing for a second date, y’know? But something feels off. I don’t know, maybe I’m being crazy.”

“You’re definitely not being crazy, it sounds fishy to me. If he doesn’t answer in five minutes I want you to leave and come straight over. I’ll have white Russians and Drag Race waiting for you” Wanda always knew just what to say, just how to make you feel. You were grateful for her.

You sighed into the receiver. “Thanks, babe, I’ll let you know what happens either way”. You hung up and grabbed some toilet paper to dab at the corners of your eyes. You knew you’d need an extra minute to compose yourself as you faced the truth.

He’s not coming, he’s not texting me back, he probably regretted setting the date which is why he put the reservation in my name, I won’t be hearing from him again. Just pay your tab, smile, and leave. You got this.

7:52 PM

Checking your appearance in the mirror one last time you let out a final sigh and push open the door back to the dining room. Your walk to your table begins to slow when you notice someone is sitting at your table. A rather tall, unfamiliar someone.

Did the waiter really give away the table? I’ve been gone all of 7 minutes! What do I even say to this stranger? Should I just grab my bag and go? Hopefully it’s still there.

Your final steps towards your seat are nervous and uneven. The man in the chair opposite yours must’ve heard you and he faces you. You’re struck with an unfamiliar but extremely handsome face. The look of surprise must be tangible because he laughs and slight wrinkles form at the edges of his eyes. Who the fuck is this guy? Well he hasn’t stolen my purse so there’s that.

“I-” You lean over to grab your purse when you’re cut off mid-apology.

“I’m so sorry, sweetheart, you know how it is at work. Sit down, I ordered a bottle of wine for the table”. The man said.

You sat down slowly and felt so stiff and uncomfortable in the chair. Were you being pranked? Was this part of some very elaborate joke? Before you could ask any of those questions the man reached across the table and grabbed your hand.

“If you could just hold my hand and be quiet, that would be nice” He said as his thumb grazed your knuckles. You were slightly stunned by his boldness. You complied, if only out of shock and hoped he’d explain himself a little better or let you go in time for you to make an exit.

He leaned in closer to you, to anyone else it would’ve looked like an intimate moment during any normal date. He looked you in the eyes while he kept hold of your hand and you realized how warm he was, how clear his eyes were. You took a deep breath through your nose and tried to play it cool.

“I’ve been at the bar for a while now, it seems like whichever idiot decided to stand you up made a grave mistake.” Your brows pinched together and he continued, “I was with a friend talking business but he left and you look like you needed to be saved from the incident so here I am. James Barnes, but you can call me Bucky.”

You were unsure what to do with the information just given to you. Yes, it would’ve been embarrassing to pay your tab and leave alone after sitting there for almost an entire hour by yourself, but it was also embarrassing that this man had noticed and you certainly didn’t need anyone looking at you like some damsel in distress.

You caught yourself from scoffing completely and schooled your features. “I… appreciate that you’d do that for me but I don’t want anyone’s sympathy, especially not a date.” You tried to pull away when his hand gently squeezed yours.

“Please- I- I didn’t mean to make it sound like I’m doing this out of pity. Whatever happened here is unfortunate, yes. But you’re also very beautiful and you’re here by yourself so why not ‘shoot my shot’ as I believe the kids are saying these days? Think of me like a stand-in for the other guy, but y’know, better” he replied playfully.

A very brief moment of contemplation was solidified by your lack of notifications on your phone. Why not? He’s good looking and he’s doing you a favor.

You had to at least afford a small chuckle at that. “So ‘Bucky’, huh? Well I don’t have any cool nicknames but you can call me by my first name.” You gave it to him and he repeated it back to you, a wry smile on his face.

8:05 PM

Still no texts from him but you did text Wanda to tell her everything worked out and there’d be details to come. She’d go into full on mama bear mode if you hadn’t updated her.

“So, Bucky, what do you do? Do you live here in Manhattan?” You asked before taking a sip of your wine (which you didn’t dare check the price of per bottle).

“Brooklyn, actually, but a lot of my business is here. Have you heard of Buchannan hospitality?” He asked.

Your brain snagged itself on that name. That sounds familiar? Where have I seen that? Oh wait! Didn’t you see him in the Forbes ‘30 under 30’ list last year?

You’d meant to answer him but unfortunately all that came out was a confused “Forbes?” at which he laughed a little bit and nodded.

“Yeah you might’ve seen me there. I own some hotels and lounges around Manhattan and Brooklyn. What do you do?” He had brushed off his accolades so quickly, wanting instead to know about you, this random girl that had been stood up.

Shit, your mid-level marketing job doesn’t stand up to this in the least. You took a sip of the wine and answered him, explaining you were second in command of your small company’s marketing department.

He seemed genuinely intrigued and you two ended up talking business and swapping office and university disaster stories until the main course arrived. You dug into your meal, savoring the taste and relishing in the unusual turn of events.

8:47 PM

The plates have been cleared away and the wine glasses refilled. Bucky was proving to be great company and as oddly as it started you were grateful to be sitting here with him. You’d nearly forgotten about your would-be date and decided to check your phone one last time.

You had 11 unread texts, 10 of them from Wanda wanting a play-by-play and one of them from the man that had stood you up. You opened it and sighed. ‘Can’t make it tonight, baby, promise to make it up to you soon’.

You scoffed to yourself. He’s not gonna say where he’s been? Or even say sorry? Douche.

You put your phone away and looked back up to Bucky who was eyeing you with playful curiosity.

“Lemme guess, that was the guy who was supposed to be seeing you’s sorry ass excuse followed by a flimsy apology” He said as he drank from his water glass.

“You’re 1 for 3. It was him but he didn’t apologize or try to explain himself. Should’ve known when he put the reservation under my name and not his that something might be up and when he wasn’t there on time.” You said more to yourself than to Bucky.

“What’s his name?” Bucky asked.

“His name’s Brock Rumlow,” Bucky’s expression changed just slightly at this. “I think he works at some firm in the financial district. We only ever went out the once before this so I don’t really remember.” You explained. “What? What’s that look for? Please don’t tell me you know him”.

“Sorry to say that I do. Sorry to say I know his wife too” He said a little more quietly.

You felt humiliated all over again, the same feelings that you experienced in this very seat not an hour ago still had you by the gills it would seem.

Bucky reached for your hand again, running the pads of his thumb across the ridges of your knuckles in an attempt to calm you.

“I’m sorry sweetheart, I didn’t mean to make you upset, but you definitely ought to know that Rumlow is no one that deserves your time” Bucky said in earnest.

His words were nice but you’d need some time to get over this embarrassment on your own. In the meantime, you really were enjoying Bucky’s company so you decided to let it distract you.

Bucky flagged down a waiter, signaling him to bring the check. He took one glance at it and set his card inside. As you reached for the bill with your own card in hand he gave it to the waiter before you could even get a peek. He was so nonchalant when he looked at you.

“Don’t even think about it. So tell me, is the night over or are you game to spend a little more time on me?” He asked. This is the second time he’d been dominant but kind in one breath. You weren’t entirely sure how you felt but you didn’t dislike it.

If you went home you’d just be wallowing in your own self pity, or you’d go to Wanda’s and do it but if you go with Bucky you could delay that feeling for a bit longer. Out with a stranger it is.

“Where to?” You asked him.

9:59 PM

A private booth on the top floor of what he said was one of his favorite lounges turned out to be where to. You were relieved to find there was no dancing, as you had two left feet and half a bottle of wine by now. When you got to the booth you stuck with water, knowing you’d need to get yourself home.

Bucky had insisted on one glass of champagne ‘to chance encounters’ he’d said. You agreed but just one. You found yourself closer to him while you talked, your knees touched and his hand found its way to your leg. It didn’t dare to move higher up, just staying there like a comforting weight almost while you conversed.

You were rambling on about the time you and your cousin took your dad’s car for a joyride when you were 14. You were laughing the whole thing off when you realized he wasn’t laughing with you. You had worried for a moment that you’d bored him when you saw the soft yet intense look in his eye and tilted your head with curiosity.

“You’re very beautiful, you know that right?” He didn’t let you answer as he shifted closer. “I’d like to kiss you, is that alright with you?”

Oh. You were caught off guard by the abruptness of his question. Suddenly shy, all you could do was give a small nod and bite your lip in anticipation. His full lips were soft and almost as warm as his hands, which were holding you in an embrace. One of your hands had made their way to his hair and one on the outside of his lower thigh. You sighed as you kissed him back.

It was soft but insistent, things became a little more passionate as you swiped your tongue into his mouth and you both let out a small moan. You didn’t want to stop kissing Bucky, it just felt right.

He finally broke the kiss as one of his hands still rested at the nape of your neck. You were breathless, this man had kissed the daylights out of you. If he could do that with his tongue imagine what else he could do with it. You were both panting softly, sorting through what to make of things and where to go from here.

“I don’t know about you, but I wanna keep doing that, but this might not be the best place for it. You can say no if you want to, and you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, but I’d love to take you home and treat you right” He said with unwavering eye contact.

Well how on Earth could I say no to that even if I wanted to? Wait doesn’t he live in Brooklyn?

“Let’s go back to mine, probably closer” You said. He nodded in agreement and sent a text to his driver to come pick you both up.

10:40 PM

You did indeed find out what else that tongue of his could do, you were finding out right now. He had made you cum once from his tongue alone already but he added to thick fingers and started pumping them into you, making a scissoring motion that hit you just right. You arched your back and pushed his face in deeper as you cried out, signaling your second orgasm.

Completely drunk in the afterglow of it, you wanted to keep this feeling forever. You wanted to show him what you could do too. You got up albeit with a little shakiness and hovered over him. You kissed his neck and slid your hand down to meet his groin. He was still in his briefs and you pulled the elastic band down with ease.

His cock sprang free and you had to hide the slight surprise you felt looking at the sheer size of him. You were always told you were good in bed so time to really put yourself to the test. You kissed your way down to his pelvis and your hand started working him. Staring back up at him you maintained eye contact while you kissed the dab of pre-cum that pooled at the head of his dick.

He shuddered but you kept staring at him, and in what you have to say was a pretty proud moment for you, you held his gaze while you took him slowly and in one go. You closed your eyes and moaned, feeling him in the back of your throat.

“Shit, oh my god. Are you gonna…?” He was lost for words so you decided to answer him by getting to work. You started slowly, up and down, letting yourself get used to his size and reminding yourself to breathe through your nose and stay relaxed.

His moans were growing louder and his breathing heavier, you knew he was close and you were wondering if he was going to let you finish him. You got your answer when he pulled you off of him by the hair.

“As bad as I want you to finish what you started, I wanna feel you first.” He panted.

“So what’s stopping you?” You asked playfully. A small shriek escaped you as he flipped you under him. He lined himself up with your entrance and thrust in slowly. You could tell he was using a lot of restraint but that was quickly forgotten as you remembered how big he was. You suddenly appreciated the slow pace.

As he became fully sheathed inside of you you let out a loud moan that was quickly silenced by his lips on yours. A few more small thrusts and he was nearly fucking your cervix. You felt unbelievably full.

“Had no idea how talented that mouth was of yours, doll. Trying to make me cum without getting to fuck you though? Now that’s just cruel. I think you need to pay for that, don’t you?” He asked playfully as his thrusts became a little harder and forceful.

You could only nod and moan as he picked up his pace. Your hands clung to his shoulders for dear life and you whimpered and keened while he railed you into your mattress. Finally getting used to the feeling you reached down to play with your clit.

“Did I say you could touch yourself?” He asked in between grunts.

Your eyes rounded and you shook your head.

“I wanna be the one to touch you. Make you cum. Only me.” He forced out as he replaced your fingers with his. He made tight, quick circles around your clit but didn’t let up on his pace as he fucked you closer and closer to a third orgasm.

“Your pussy’s making it fuckin’ impossible for me to hold out any longer, need you to cum, sweetheart. Cum all over my fuckin’ dick.” His words sent you right over the edge and you did as you were asked.

Not two seconds later he cried out and emptied himself inside of you, sending a few final pushes into you before taking himself out and dropping down on his side.

You leaned over and kissed him with what little breath you two had left. Your sweat mixed together but you didn’t mind.

His hands provided that comforting weight as he brought one to your shoulder and the other to your hip. He kissed the tip of your nose and watched you begin to drift off to sleep. He could probably use the rest himself and decided to close his eyes for a bit.

9:30 AM

You woke up in a half empty bed, but before you could let yourself be too disappointed you heard the sound of your shower turning off. You padded down to the bathroom and opened the door to find Bucky toweling off. He gave you a lopsided grin.

“Good mornin’, I would’ve asked you to join me but you looked so peaceful I didn’t wanna wake you.” He explained. “If you’re not sick of me, do you maybe wanna grab some breakfast?”

You shook your head and reached past him to turn the shower back on.

“No way. I make the best pancakes and as a thank you for everything last night, I insist on making some for you.” You smiled up at him, hopeful he’d agree.

“Well I hope you know what you’re up against, I’m a very insatiable man.” He joked back.

You hit him with a washcloth and laughed. “Oh believe me I know. Gimme 15 and I’ll be right out.”

He nodded and closed the door behind him. You let your mind wander back to last night as you washed off the sweat that lingered from the night before.

10:15 AM

You set down two plates stacked mile-high with pancakes and bacon. You held your coffee mug up to his and clinked against it.

“To chance encounters” You said with a smile.

[mypoisonedvine]

A Year Gone By | dark!Bucky Barnes x reader

happy birthday @nsfwsebbie​!!

it was supposed to be a surprise but then I couldn’t stop myself from telling you I was writing something, I managed to keep most of it under wraps though!  I hope the suspense pays off.  

idk if it’s weird that i made it a doctor reader when you’re not a doctor but listen...half the fun of reader insert is getting to vicariously live through a cool career right??  the other half of the fun is the obvious thing.  and it seemed a little creepy if i made the reader exactly like you but if you want it to be more accurate i will totally write you something with actual you in it lol

ANYWAYS I hope you enjoy it and most of all I hope you have a lovely, relaxing, fun birthday.  and i hope it makes you h word lmao.  ily darling <3

warnings: noncon, dubcon, stalking/kidnapping, ddlg, loss of virginity, bondage, oral sex (m and f receiving), anal sex, d/s, pet play, degradation, painful sex/pain kink, cockwarming, breeding, somnophilia (slightly), spitting, pregnancy mention, breeding kink, mention of drugging... I think that’s everything.

word count: just over 15.5k (YIIIIKES my bad)

Bucky always looked forward to appointments with you.  It wasn’t just because he had a crush on you, honest; you really were the best doctor he ever had.  Then again, between chain-smoking Brooklyn doctors who handed out morphine like candy and cruel Nazi or Soviet scientists, you weren’t competing with anybody too incredible.

“It’s not so bad,” he bluffed, but he couldn’t hide the wince when you touched his bruise.

“You’re not a very good liar, Sergeant,” you told him with a smile.  God, he loved when you called him that.  He hoped his body wouldn’t react to it in any uncomfortably obvious ways.  “Honestly, I’m a little worried about the bones.  I want to do an X-ray, if you don’t mind.”

“Go ahead,” he shrugged, “but you’re probably worrying too much.”

“You plan to walk off a compound fracture?” you scoffed.

“Bet I could, if you kiss it to make it better,” he smiled.  He was expecting you to giggle a little at the casual flirtation, which you did, but he was surprised when you bit your lip at the end of it.  That made it impossible to stop his cock from getting a bit interested, but thankfully it was still easy enough to hide.  Clearly his casual flirting was starting to get to you, and it made him especially impatient but he tried to stay calm.

“I’m a good doctor, but I’m not that good.  A prescription will do more for you,” you replied as you wrote something in his chart-- presumably that he needed to go down the hall for some x-ray work.

“If you say so.”

“Anything else bothering you?” you asked him.

“Oh, no, I won’t waste your time,” he dismissed.

“I’m getting paid, don’t worry,” you laughed.  “I don’t have any more appointments until after lunch.  Is there anything else going on?”

He shifted a little, the paper on the examination table crinkling as he did it.  “Um… it’s nothing, I just--” he glanced up at you but then looked away again, still embarrassed to admit it-- “I’ve had a little trouble sleeping…”

“Nightmares?” you pressed.  “Or general insomnia?”

“Um, nightmares,” he finally admitted, “not as bad as normal.  The meds helped.  Just… I still get them sometimes.”

“How many nights a week would you guess?” you asked.  But you didn’t look to his chart like it was a quiz or something, you kept looking at him with patience and compassion.  That was what really made his heart melt.

“Probably 2 or 3.”

“So we’re down from 6 to 7,” you remembered from what he’d said before you’d given him the medication he was on now, “that’s good.  That’s progress.  But, maybe we need to up your dosage if you haven’t seen better results after 4 weeks.  You haven’t missed any doses, have you?”

He tried to fight his embarrassed smirk but it was too late.

“Bucky!” you scolded playfully.  “I can’t up your dosage until you’re actually being consistent on the amount you already have, okay?  I know it can be easy to forget but you have to stay on it.  Set a timer on your phone or something if you need to.”

He nodded, but the problem wasn’t forgetting to take them as much as it was being ashamed that he needed them at all.  But he’d stay on them if it made you happy.

“Anything else?  Headache, twisted ankle, burns when you pee?”

He laughed and shook his head.  “No, I think that’s everything.”

“Great, then I’ll let you get to your newly-booked X-ray appointment.”  You handed him a sheet of paper for him to take to the X-ray office which informed the nurses there what angles you wanted on his ribs.  “Just know that you can call me if you need anything, alright?”

He took the slip of paper but suddenly couldn’t respond, too lost in looking at you and wondering if you’d felt that same jolt of electricity when his hand brushed yours.

“What are you looking at me like that for?” you asked, breaking the silence.

“You take care of so many people,” Bucky pondered aloud, “I just wonder if someone takes care of you.”

He could tell by your face that you didn’t like the way his tone shifted, but he refused to backpedal.  Just this once, he wanted to see you squirm a little bit.  

“Wanna lollipop?” you asked him nervously as you handed him the plastic-wrapped red sucker in offering, but he waved it away.  

He spent the rest of the afternoon thinking about how you would look with the cherry lollipop in your mouth: the way it would push your cheek out from the inside, stain your lips and tongue bright red, make your mouth taste like pure sugar.  

Of all the things he’d imagined before, that was the one that made him realize it couldn’t just be a fantasy anymore.  Thankfully, he hadn’t just been thinking of all the filthy things he wanted to do to you; he’d also been coming up with a plan.

~

The first thing you perceived when you woke up was the smell.  It didn’t smell like your room.  Such a simple difference, one you hadn’t even realized you would notice, but one that stood out instantly.

You opened your eyes and instantly spun your head around when you saw the grey cement room you were in.  The bed underneath you creaked, unlike your bed, and you looked down at it as if you somehow expected to be in an unknown room but still be in your own bed.  

It was then that you realized you were restrained with, of all things, satiny pink rope which pulled each of your limbs to the nearest bedpost.  There was enough slack that you could wiggle around some, but it wasn’t exactly roomy either.  Your heart raced as you pondered who could have possibly done this, and why.

You startled when you heard the door open, but relaxed when the menacing form suddenly struck you as familiar.

“Bucky,” you sighed with relief, “oh thank god you’re here-- quick, help untie me.”

As soon as you said it, though, you realized something wasn’t right.  He didn’t look concerned at all, or confused.  And that should be a good thing because it meant he had answers, except that you were suddenly realizing this was more complex than you were prepared for.

“Bucky… where are we?” you asked him, quieter, as you realized that he was not going to untie you immediately.  Even still you were coming to terms with the possibility that it wasn’t really a matter of where we were and where, specifically, you were.

“Somewhere safe,” he answered simply, stepping closer.

You didn’t exactly believe that.  

“Please, help untie me,” you requested again.

“I will,” he assured, “but I want to explain something first.”

Your heart sank straight through your stomach.  You didn’t understand what was going on quite yet, but you were getting the gist enough to know that this was really fucking bad.

“Bucky,” you pleaded as he sat down beside you on the bed, “please let me go.”  You felt very aware of how thin your pajama set was, how if he tried hard enough he could see your nipples hardening underneath your top for no apparent reason.

“Don’t get upset,” he soothed, “everything’s fine.  I’m not going to hurt you-- nobody will anymore.  You’re gonna stay here, with me, and I’m gonna take care of you.”

Your eyes burned with tears you couldn’t fight anymore.  “Don’t do this,” you begged, “I’m your friend-- we’re friends, remember?”

“Of course I know that,” he sighed, “but that’s not enough.  Couldn’t you tell I’d fallen in love with you?”

You shook your head, trying to process everything you were hearing.  “This is insane.  This is not what you do when you have feelings for somebody, Bucky.”

“What, you’re saying I should’ve just asked you out?”

“Well, I wouldn’t have been able to say yes-- because you’re my patient--”

“See?  That’s what the ropes are for!” he smiled, like he was actually proud of his problem-solving skills.  “You would’ve said yes if you could, I know.  But you couldn’t.  And now you don’t have to.”

You resented that he was right, that you would’ve dated him in a heartbeat if it wasn’t an ethical violation.  You got the sense there were going to be even more severe ethical violations in your future, though.

You continued to beg him to stop, but it fell on deaf ears as he reached under the elastic waistband of your pajama shorts and pulled them down slowly.  He gasped when he saw your pussy and you wished you could just disappear, turn invisible or, best of all, teleport out of here; anything to avoid this humiliation.

“Baby, you’re wet,” he observed.  You weren’t sure if the first or second half of the sentence made you more uncomfortable, but either way, you couldn’t stop the shivers from dancing up your spine.  “This all for me?  Do you like being tied up?”

You refused to answer, looking to the side as if the concrete wall was suddenly fascinating to you, but he grabbed your jaw and turned you to look at him.

“I know you don’t know all the rules yet, but here’s the first one, and maybe the most important: answer me when I speak to you.”

It was cold but not quite threatening; still scared you senseless, though.  You nodded.

“Do you like being tied up?” he repeated.

“N-no,” you answered.

“Answer honestly,” he specified.

You had, but you realized it was going to be safer to do what he wanted, so you cleared your throat and spoke again.

“Yes,” you whispered, “I like… being tied up.”

“That’s it?” he pressed.  “It’s not me being here, is it?  You never got wet when you saw me in appointments?”

This was going to be a lot harder than you anticipated.  It seemed like there was no right answer.

“Didja ever get wet for somebody else?  It was Steve, wasn’t it?”

“No!” you instinctively answered.  “Um, I like Steve.  But just as a friend.”

“Aw,” he smiled, “I knew you were the loyal type.  Remember just a minute ago when you were begging me to stop cause you were my friend?  I think you were lying then too, doll.  You didn’t want to be just friends with me.”

“Whatever you’re going to do, just do it,” you grimaced.  “I’m getting irritated.”

You yelped when he slapped the inside of your thigh, trying to pull away but only making it easier for him to dip under your leg so that he was between them, sitting back on the bed in front of you.

“Respect gets you a long way with me,” he promised, pulling a knife from a strap on his thigh and using it to quickly cut off the shorts.  “Sass does not.”

You winced as he slipped a finger into you-- metal, and it was cold, too.  Soothed the burn a bit, at least.

“Oh god,” he sighed, “just one finger and it barely fits…”  You watched realization pass over his face as his gaze moved to your eyes.  “Baby, are you a virgin?”

You closed your eyes because you knew they would reveal the truth.  In all honesty it was probably better that he knew so there was at least some chance of him going easy on you, and yet you were still embarrassed for him to find out.

“Oh, you’re going to spoil me,” he grinned.  “You really are too good to be true.”

A second finger pushed into you and a bite to the lip suppressed your moan.  

“I’ll warm you up first, don’t worry,” he cooed.  “I don’t wanna hurt you.”

“Then why did you tie me up?”

“That’s for your safety, baby.  I don’t wanna have to hurt you,” he clarified.

A third finger, immediately after you had adjusted to the second.  You had never had so much inside you before and it made you feel a bit dizzy.  His thumb grazed over your clit and you nearly jumped right off the bed as your hips bucked suddenly-- since when were you so sensitive?!

“Oh, poor little baby, you need it so bad,” he faux-pouted.  You couldn’t tell if it was a mockery or genuine concern.  “You’ll get it angel, don’t worry.  Daddy’s gonna take care of you.”

That word made you feel a little sick.  No wonder he needed to kidnap girls to get his rocks off, clearly this was the kind of stuff a normal date wouldn’t agree to.

Then again, it was Bucky Barnes.  He could probably get any girl he wanted, even if he had some weird tastes.  You still didn’t understand why it had to be you, specifically.  

His thumb stayed on your clit, the pressure moving from teasing to firm to nearly too much.  You tried to angle your hips away but the ropes stopped you (of course), and you were forced to take every sensation he gave you.

“You’re trying so hard to stay quiet, just let go,” he encouraged.  “I wanna hear how good I make you feel.”

“Maybe I’m just naturally quiet,” you bluffed, but even just those few words were strained, and surrounded by panting as you failed to catch your breath.

“Oh, we both know that’s not true.  I’ve heard you when you thought you were alone, doll.”

You knew what he must have meant, but it still made you whimper when he leaned in to whisper in your ear: “I heard you touching yourself.”

Your face was burning and you were sure you’d never blushed so hard in your life.  You couldn’t be sure how much he’d heard, but just the way he smiled down at you made you sure he must have heard the times that his name passed your lips as you reached your peak.  

Of course he couldn’t just let you stew in that, he had to mock you even further.

“Oh Bucky,” he recalled, raising the pitch of his voice a little, “please let me come, I’m so close, please…”

“Stop,” you begged, tears sliding down your temples.  The fingers twisted inside you as both of you groaned.

“Yeah, it’s not a very good impression,” he sighed, “it’ll sound better when you do it.  Don’t you wanna moan for me again?”

“You stalked me,” you realized aloud, “you spied on me at night, you kidnapped me--”

“And now we’re both getting what we want.  I know you wished it was my fingers instead of yours.  Doesn’t it feel good baby?  Admit it.  Tell me it feels good.”

You were determined to resist until he pulled his fingers out and used the metal hand to slap your pussy, both of you gasping at the wet noise it made.  He did it again and your hips bucked wildly even as you were trying with everything in you not to react.  One more and you finally moaned, the pain brief but strong while the pleasure never seemed to lessen.

“Just be honest,” he demanded, “I know you love it.  I just need you to say it.”

One more spank and you were finally willing to cut your losses.  “It feels good!” you exclaimed.  You cried out when he hit you again, not having seen it coming at all since you’d done as he asked.  “Say it again.”

“It feels good, Bucky, your fingers feel good,” you whimpered.

He finally seemed to calm down, giving you an oddly friendly smile.  “Was that so hard?”

You shook your head, just trying to appreciate the stillness while you could.  

“One little thing though: you don’t call me Bucky anymore.  My friends call me Bucky; you’re so much more special than that.  You’re my perfect little angel, and you call me Daddy.”

You saw it coming, but it didn’t make it any less awful.  You squirmed a bit as he pushed up your top, biting his lip when he got a glimpse of your breasts.

“Oh, when did these get hard, huh?” he smiled as he tweaked your nipples between his fingers.

“It’s… cold in here,” you explained uncomfortably.

“Uh huh,” he pretended to believe you.  “Don’t worry, we’ll find a way to warm you up.”

He let go of your tits so he could pull back and start undoing his belt; you swallowed dryly, not wanting to watch but unable to look away.

Of course he was big.  It explained his personality, and you’d had your suspicions (and/or fantasies), but now all it did was scare you.

“Will it hurt?” you asked weakly.  He smiled as he pulled off his shirt from behind his neck, tossing it aside.  

“No baby, I stretched you with my fingers so you can take me.  Might be a little bit of an adjustment at first, but we’ll go slow, okay?”

You couldn’t decide if it was sweet or patronizing.  A little of both, perhaps.

He leaned over you, resting one hand beside your head as the other guided his cock to rub through your folds.  You struggled again, barely able to process that this was actually going to happen, that you were going to lose your virginity tied up in some creepy sex dungeon to an obsessive patient who demanded you call him ‘Daddy.’  This wasn’t exactly the situation you had been saving it for.

“Ready for me, baby?  Want me to make you mine?” he asked with a look of excitement, even vulnerability.  Your body craved more after he’d left you dangling on the edge from his fingering, but your brain was thankfully still functioning properly.

“Please don’t,” you whimpered, “you can stop now, and I won’t tell anyone, and--”

“Baby, don’t talk like that,” he frowned.  “This is it, okay?  Us.  Just us.  Nobody else to get in the way.  You’re not gonna tell anyone ‘cause there’s no one to tell.”

“You can’t,” you denied, “I have a life-- people who care about me, who are going to notice that I’m gone--”

“No, babygirl, stop-- you’re not listening to me,” he growled.  “Stop fighting.  You’re mine.  You’re finally where you belong.”

“This is crazy,” you spat, “you’re crazy!”

“Baby…” he looked dejected, crestfallen.  “You’re the only one who’s ever helped me feel normal again.  If I’m crazy it’s only because I love you so much; I need you, doll.”

“You need intensive psychiatric care!”

Sadness shifted to anger as he sat back and stuffed his cock back into his trousers, even though it barely fit now that it was fully hard and leaking from the tip.

“I realize now I’ve given you more than you can handle.  I knew you liked me back so I figured you would understand a little sooner but… I should’ve known you need more time before you really admit to yourself that you need someone to take care of you.”

Your relief shifted to fear when he stood back up off the bed and stepped away.

“Wait, don’t leave me here,” you squeaked, “untie me, please.”

Instead he knelt down and pulled a box out from under the bed.  You couldn’t see what was inside when he opened it, but he seemed to find what he was looking for when he pulled out a vibrator and shut the lid.  It was thin and a little curved, so when he roughly shoved it into you it hit right on your g-spot.  You tried to squirm away but he held your hips down and turned it on to a setting that strobed the vibrations, teasing your spot but never giving you enough to get very far.

“I’ll come back when I think you’ve learned your lesson,” he informed you quickly as he started to leave the room.

“Bucky-- Bucky wait!” you called after him.  “There’s no food or water you can’t leave me here wait don’t go BUCKY!”

But he was long gone.  The door slammed behind him and echoed around the room; only when the sound was completely dead were you sure that he wasn’t coming back any time soon.

You had no way of knowing how much time had passed, but it felt like an eternity of you wiggling against the ropes, trying to either knock the vibrator out of you somehow or get it to move enough that you could at least come and feel some relief.  Trying to push it out with your muscles was useless since the curved shape kept it inside of you, and you couldn’t arch your back enough to press it into the bed-- and if you could, you weren’t sure what good that would do.

Every once in a while the vibration would echo through your clit and it made your eyes water.  You sobbed and bit your lip, hoping he would come back soon.

It was at least twice as long before he did, and at that point your voice had gone hoarse from calling out to him.  You cried out for Bucky at least a hundred times and got nothing; but when you called for ‘Daddy’ just once, he suddenly appeared.

Somehow his return didn’t bring much relief, because you weren’t exactly safe with him around… but at least you weren’t alone.

He reached between your legs and turned the vibrator off, though he left it inside of you.  You took a deep breath and appreciated the stillness, though your body panged with hunger from so much pleasure with no release.

“I hated doing that to you,” he breathed deeply as he sat beside you on the bed, “but it had to be done.  You were behaving so poorly.  I’ve gone easy on you up until now but I can’t tolerate any more rebelliousness, alright?”

You nodded slowly, feeling the weight of his disappointment sink over you.  

When he pulled out the vibrator, the tip of it grazed over your abused and sensitive g-spot and you bit back a groan.  He set it aside and admired the mess you’d made; you couldn’t see it, of course, but you could tell that there was a wet patch of arousal beneath you on the sheets.

“Your body is ready for me, but I’m not sure your mind is right yet,” he explained, steely gaze finally meeting yours.  “Are you going to be good, little girl?”

You were too exhausted to notice the nickname, or even to speak your reply.  You just nodded again, watching him as he started unlacing his boots and slipped them off, then took his socks, trousers, and underwear off along with them.

Shit, you’d nearly forgotten how big he was.  You swallowed with a dry throat and closed your eyes, just hoping it would be over with quickly.  

“Open your eyes babygirl, I wanna look at you,” he murmured, running a finger across your cheek.  You reluctantly obeyed and saw him hovering above you.  He pressed a gentle kiss to your lips and it felt so wrong, so empty and peculiar.  It was a weak facsimile of what a kiss was supposed to be like.  He closed his eyes and ran his fingers into your hair, and it had all the trappings of the kind of kiss you’d share as a goodbye after a first or second date, but without any of the stuff that mattered like positive feelings or consent or not being in a creepy cement sex dungeon-- or whatever this was supposed to be.

He pulled away and looked down at you again, anger just starting to brew in his eyes.  “Kiss me back,” he demanded.  This time when he pressed his lips to yours, his tongue slid between them and it made you feel a little sick but you did your best to reciprocate.  You found yourself trying to reach up to put your hands on his hair or neck but of course, the ropes made it impossible.

You felt his cock pressing between your thighs, rubbing up and down slowly, and your heart began to race.  One hand slid between your bodies to guide his cock towards your entrance and he said something but you couldn’t hear it because your ears were ringing.  

As soon as he pushed into you, your body jolted, trying to squirm away, but he just kept going, sliding into you in one long stroke.

Physically, it wasn’t painful.  The vibrator had helped relax your walls, even numbed them a little bit.  And yet, even without pain it was so much.  You felt like the wind had been knocked out of you, like you were so full you couldn’t even breathe.  

When he was fully seated inside you, Bucky moaned deeply, kissing your neck and mumbling something about how perfect you were.  But all you could focus on was his cock pulling back only to slam home again.  

“Fuck!” you yelped.  You had no idea anything could be so deep inside you.  

“Watch your language, angel,” he purred, biting at your earlobe.  “You promised to be good, remember?”

The hand that had been gripping your thigh suddenly moved to rub your clit and you choked on a moan.  

“It’s okay, it’s supposed to feel good,” he encouraged.  “It’s okay to come, baby.  I know how bad you wanna come for me.”

You were embarrassingly close as he had observed, a side effect of having been left on the edge for so long.  You could feel your walls rippling around him, and you wondered if he could feel it, too.  Every thrust stroked parts of you that you hadn’t even realized existed, and when he pushed as deep as he could into you, the tip of his cock hit something so sensitive that you genuinely couldn’t tell if it was painful or pleasurable.  

“Are you close?  I don’t know how much longer I can last, you’re so tight,” he groaned.  “Fuck, you want me to fill you up don’t you?  Wanna be full of Daddy’s cum?”

Before you could even consider ignoring his question, he wrapped his left hand around your neck.

“Yes, Daddy,” you croaked through the weight on your windpipe, “fill me up, please.”

Talking like that made your heart twist with shame but somehow pushed you even closer to your peak.  You knew he could tell that you were turned on by it from the way your muscles tightened around him.

“I will baby, I promise,” he smiled.  “Do you wanna beg to come, like you did when you were by yourself?”

You moaned because it was like a fantasy come true, in a monkey’s paw sort of way.  This is what you had wanted, right?  Just… in a way completely different from how it was turning out?

“Daddy, please,” you answered, so quiet and heavy with embarrassment that it was barely above a whisper, “please let me come.”

“Oh fuck,” he responded hoarsely as his thrusts came faster, more ragged.  “Come, princess.  I wantcha to scream for me.”

As you started to fall over the edge, you felt like you had lost control over your body; your arms and legs tugged at the ropes as jolts of pleasure coursed through them, and your mouth was spilling moans and whimpers and even his name.  His real name, specifically, though he thankfully didn’t seem to mind.  He kissed you again as he came, moaning into your lips and still inside you.  

You felt cold and sticky and humiliated as he sat up and pulled out, admiring the way your hole leaked out his seed and flexed involuntarily around nothing.

“Oh look at you,” he praised, “my perfect little girl.  You’re even more amazing than I dreamed, doll.”

You tried not to listen or watch him as he got off the bed, coming back with boxers on and a damp washcloth to clean you.

“I’m gonna untie you now, okay?  Promise you won’t kick me or anything?” 

You quickly nodded, willing to promise anything if it meant getting untied.  “You’ll just do more harm to you than to me if you try anything, angel,” he reminded you quickly as he started work on your right ankle.  The ropes were silky so they hadn’t been rubbing your skin too raw, but there was still soreness from the tight knots.  You were a bit surprised when he gave your ankle and foot a brief massage once he was done untying the rope, and did the same to your other foot, and then your wrists and hands.  It helped a lot with getting the blood flow back to normal, and you almost considered thanking him but that would’ve been ridiculous.  ‘Hey, thanks for the foot massage, next time don’t tie me up and rape me first but, otherwise 10/10.’  

~

Bucky was so impressed with the progress you’d made in a week.  Only two escape attempts and you’d taken your punishment quite well both times.  He had expected a rocky start, he’d understood what he was getting himself into, so none of it really came as a surprise.  You’d managed to get a good crack at his nose once, kicking him straight between the eyes before making a run for it.  Yes, it hurt like a bitch and took a few days to heal, but it had actually been a blessing in disguise; that day you’d made it out the front door and realized that you were in the middle of nowhere.  When he’d caught up to you, you were standing barefoot and half-naked in the snow, not even running anymore because, apparently, you’d realized there was nowhere to run to.  

“I built this place for us, for you,” he explained.  “Somewhere far away, all to ourselves.  Nobody for miles.”

“How many miles?”

He chuckled a bit to himself.  “Baby, it’s a really big number.  You’re too little to understand.”

Normally you resisted that sort of talk but this time it shut you up.  Hopefully you were beginning to properly realize that this was your new life.

“Are we in New York?” you asked, quieter.

“I’m not sure if I should tell you that yet.  I don’t want you to get any complicated ideas in that pretty little head,” he cooed, kissing your forehead for emphasis before leaving you behind to start cooking dinner.

“I’m not eating with these,” you announced firmly as he set your place at the table with a set of pink, rubber-coated utensils.  

“It’s too messy to eat with your hands,” he frowned.

“Do you honestly not realize that I want to eat with normal utensils?  Or are you just trying to drive me insane?”

Bucky set your plate down a little too firmly, making you and the food on top jump.  “Don’t talk back to me.”  

“I just… it’ll take me forever to finish an adult-sized portion of food with child-sized utensils.”

“Then maybe you’re not ready for an adult-sized portion,” he threatened.  That seemed to get your attention, but you stayed quiet.  “Maybe you’re not hungry at all?”

“I’m hungry,” you denied.  “Please, I want to eat.”

“And I want to eat with you.  But this roundabout is getting on my last nerve, doll.  Now are you gonna be good and eat your dinner?”

“...yes, Daddy,” you sighed.  He smiled and sat down across from you.  You were learning.  Slowly, but surely.

Bath time was always a fight, though.  You still had some ridiculous notions about ‘privacy’ and ‘autonomy’ and crap like that, and it meant that you were likely to act up and refuse to be washed.

“I can do it myself!”

“But you don’t have to, don’t you see?”

“I want to.”

“The world doesn’t revolve around what you want, angel.”

“Let me guess: it revolves around what you want?” “No,” Bucky shook his head and tried to summon some more patience, “I have to take care of you.  Sometimes that means doing things you don’t like, because I know what’s best for you.”

“I hate you,” you mumbled as you turned away, and that really broke his heart.  He knew you didn’t really mean it, but it still hurt.

“Baby… don’t say that,” he pleaded as he turned your face to him.  “It hurts Daddy’s feelings when you say things like that.”

“Yes, that was the idea,” you hissed.  “I just want to take a shower, alone.”

“Any chance you had at that is long gone,” he grimaced.  “What you’re getting is a bath, with me, and if you quit this attitude now you might still be able to avoid getting a spanking as well, do you understand?”

Your shoulders slumped as you nodded.  He knew your poor little bottom was still sore from the last spanking, and as he helped you undress for the bath, he could still see a few welts along the skin.  He kissed them quickly, a reminder to both of you what he was capable of, before helping you into the water and slipping in behind you.  It was spacious, so there was ample room for the two of you, but he still held you close and pressed your back into his chest.  

He had a lot of ideas about what you two could do in this bath, but he knew that now was not the time.  Still, he let his mind wander and smiled to himself when you gasped from his erection pressing into your thigh.

He helped you wash your hair, and for that moment where your head was nearly submerged and he was using his fingers to massage out the shampoo, you looked so peaceful.  He normally only got to appreciate this look on your face as you slept, but you were almost smiling this time, and it made his heart sing.  A week of tantrums was worth it for just a few quiet moments like this.

“I’m gonna let you finish up on your own, okay?  I trust you not to do anything dangerous…” he decided as he stepped out.  

“Really?” your face instantly lit up.  Sure, you’re never supposed to leave them alone in the bath, but he was feeling extra generous and he sympathized with your desire for control.  Freedom could be good for you, in moderation.

“Of course.”

“T-thank you, Daddy,” you awkwardly responded.

He dried off and dressed, and waited nearby in the living room, listening to you drain the bathwater and start a shower.    

You emerged wrapped in a towel and looking slightly lost.

"Honey, where are your clothes?" he asked you with a furrowed brow.

“I don’t have anything to wear,” you informed him.  Oh, right.  You were being resistant to wearing the clothes he had picked out for you.  Apparently you found the overwhelming presence of baby pink to be tacky, and you hated that everything was cute and tiny… he couldn't understand seeing something cute and tiny and not liking it.  After all, you were the most adorable thing he'd laid eyes on and it made it impossible not to like you.  You just needed clothes to match.

“I have clothes laid out for you,” he explained.

“I’d rather be naked than wear what you pick for me,” you snarled.

“Hey, I wouldn’t complain,” he shrugged, trying to suppress his frustration.  “Don’t come bitchin’ to me when you’re cold, though.”

You sat next to him on the couch, defiantly naked and confidently ignoring him.  He admired your stubbornness, or at least he found it amusing.

“Do you wanna watch a movie now?” he asked, but he knew you had figured out that this was a mandatory activity.

“Don’t see any reason to wait,” you smiled sarcastically.

Of course, when he got up to show you some DVDs so you could pick what you wanted (Wall-E; he knew you didn’t actually want to watch that since your typical fare was horror and action movies, but it was your favorite of the options), he quickly turned down the thermostat.  Perhaps a comfortable 55 Fahrenheit would help you remember why it’s important to take what Daddy gives you.

He hadn’t seen Wall-E before but he found it oddly relatable.  A robot, built for someone else’s purpose, abandoned in a filthy, empty world… it brought back some old feelings that he managed to press back down.  

Regardless, he was distracted from it when he could literally feel you shivering from across the couch.

“Are you cold, darling?” he asked presumptuously.

“No,” you denied, barely managing to suppress the chattering of your teeth.

“Do you want the clothes?” 

“Shut up.”

He just laughed a little to himself, ignoring your rude language and turning back to the TV.

It did kill him a bit to have to pretend he didn’t care when you were obviously uncomfortable, but you would’ve been even more irritated with him if he’d held you down and forced you to put the outfit on.

~

This fucker was smart, you’d give him that.  Or maybe it was just that you were stupid.  Not stupid, really, but having no sense of self-preservation.  Why had you chosen this hill to die on?  You couldn’t even remember why you’d put up a fight at all.  You were so cold that you couldn’t even understand what could’ve ever compelled you to reject an offer of clothes.  Didn’t help that you knew he was so close, that if you cuddled up to him you would be warm, but that it would mean the loss of your last shred of dignity.

Only a week and you were starting to completely lose your sense of yourself.  You searched within and couldn’t find any of the fight you’d had so many times before.  You remembered that time you kicked him right in the face, and where you once found pride at the memory, you found guilt.  You felt guilty for hurting him, after everything he’d done to you-- why?

“B-bucky…” you finally relented not even an hour into the movie, stammering from the force of your shivers.

“Hm?”

“I want… I want the c-clothes.”

He smiled a little, in an insulting way.  “Ask nicely, doll.”

“P-please, Daddy,” you whimpered.

He came back with the clothes in hand, but when you reached out for them, he shook his head and motioned for you to stand up.  You sighed but obeyed, your entire body shaking with violent shivers as your bare feet hit the cool concrete floor.  

He knelt down, holding the lace panties open for you as you shyly stepped into them.  He pulled them up to your hips and let the elastic slap your skin a little as he let go, making you jump.  He did the same with the fuzzy pink pyjama pants, running his hands over soft fabric for just a second as he stood up, helping you into the loose grey sweatshirt.  It was the least feminine thing he’d ever let you wear, noticeably absent in anything pink or fuzzy or girly or adorned with bows.  You only realized as it slipped over your head that it was his, because once you plunged into darkness inside of it, you were overwhelmed with the smell of him.  You wouldn’t have known that you could recognize his smell, but now that you were in it, it was undeniable.

You were almost surprised to see him when your head popped through the neckline, somehow.  It’s not as if you had forgotten he was there in the three seconds you couldn’t see him, just that he looked so different to you now.  He had this stoic, nearly stern look on his face as he helped you get your hands through the sleeves, and the way he caressed your fingers as they emerged from the cotton was so upsettingly tender.

“Daddy…” you mumbled, and he looked back at your face.  

“Is this better?  Are you warmer?”

“My feet…” you realized, looking down at them.  

“I’ll get you some socks, baby,” he nodded, dashing away for a moment.  You felt colder with him gone.  It couldn’t be loneliness, could it?  Even knowing he’d only be gone less than a minute, you were unduly anxious for his return.

He came back and held your feet up by the ankle one at a time as he rolled pink fuzzy socks-- with lace at the ankle, of course-- over your feet.  You wiggled your toes into them, finally feeling like you’d be able to get warm again.

“Let’s finish the movie, okay?” he suggested, rubbing his hands on your arms.  You nodded, allowing him to guide you back to the couch and finding yourself cuddling into his side as he laid an arm over your shoulders.

You barely managed to pay attention as you felt his hand slip lower, resting on your waist.  Then your hip, then your thigh.

Something about the way the lace panties rubbed against your pussy made you feel so oddly sensitive, and even the inside of his sweatshirt was just rough enough to make your nipples react every time you adjusted your position.

You figured he realized your condition pretty quickly, but he didn’t react until a moan, so quiet that you were sure he wouldn’t hear it, passed your lips.

“Everything alright, doll?” he asked, failing to hide the fact that he clearly knew the answer.

You didn’t respond, distracted by his other hand reaching over and stroking your thigh.  You were caged in his embrace now, and your heart raced in a way that was oddly lacking in fear.

“Tell me what you’re feeling,” he demanded, watching your nervous reaction to his intensity.

“Daddy I… I feel tingly,” you murmured, feeling yourself blush.

“Where, baby?”

“D-down there,” you admitted as you forced your eyes shut, too embarrassed to look him in the face as you said it.

“You need Daddy’s help?”

“Please,” you whispered, hating yourself a little for needing him but too desperate to really care.

In one motion he’d already turned the TV off, pulled you onto his lap, and started kissing where the baggy neckline of the sweatshirt exposed your collarbone.

You were rubbing yourself on his thigh and you didn’t even know how to stop.  It felt so good.  It made your skin warm up even faster as you recovered from the cold.  

He slipped his right hand into your pants as the other pulled you closer until your face was buried in his neck.  If there was anything worth appreciating about Bucky, it was how good he was with his fingers.  He knew your body better than you did at this point-- but then again, he had spent so much time exploring it in one week that he was probably competing with you already in terms of practice time.  

“Oh my god,” you moaned as his fingers moved faster and firmer, making your hips jerk forward unexpectedly.  

“It feels good?” he asked in that way that made it obvious he knew the answer.

“Yes, Daddy, it feels so good,” you whimpered.  You’d gotten pretty good by now at appeasing him by performing the role he wanted you to play… so good, in fact, that it was starting to feel very real.

Just as you were grabbing onto his shoulders to hold you steady through your orgasm, he was pulling out his hand and reaching for his own pants instead.

“Need to be inside you,” he explained quickly as he pushed them down and revealed his hard, leaking cock.  “I need to be inside you when I make you come.”

He helped you slide off your pants and underwear but pulled you back into his lap the absolute second they were discarded.  He slid you down onto his cock with a groan, and your face was so hot as you processed how wet you were, how easily he entered you.  Your joy halted, though, when he held your hips down.  You tried to wiggle around for some friction but he was so strong that it was a complete waste.

“Daddy,” you mumbled with confusion, “what are you doing?”

“You’re mine, baby, ‘m gonna use you how I please,” he reminded you darkly, “and right now I want you to stay still and wait.”

“But--” 

He slapped your ass harshly, and you whimpered but decided not to put up much more of a fight.

All the while as you tried to stay still, he was kissing your neck and jaw and cheeks, murmuring praises and leaving the softest bite marks every once in a while.

“Please let me move,” you sobbed against his shoulder, having to fight everything in you not to start grinding on him like your life depended on it.

“I’m not ready yet,” he denied.

“I’ll be good, I promise,” you whimpered.  “I’ll do anything.  I just need to come, and I need to make you come, please…”

With a hand on either side of your hips, he started to move you on top of him, excruciatingly slow.  Your head fell back from how wonderful just that felt.  

“Anything?  You’re gonna spoil me talking like that, doll.”

“Oh god, anything, just move a little faster, please,” you begged.  Of course you knew it was a bad idea, and you figured you were going to regret saying it, but your need was surpassing your sanity at the moment.

He grabbed your face and pulled you down until your lips were almost brushing his, but not quite.  “Keep riding my cock, babygirl.”  You nodded, finally free to pick up the pace to where you wanted it, and you bit your lip as his cock stretched you exactly how you needed it to.

“Daddy, you feel so good inside me,” you moaned.

“I can tell,” he smiled, “you’re making those perfect noises, it’s killing me not to flip you over and fuck you so hard right now.”

You were much more inspired by that mental image than you expected to be.  Those few times he’d gotten really rough with you, it had made you so wet you thought you might get dehydrated.

When he spoke again, his voice was so low that it sounded like a growl, echoing in his chest and making shivers run up your spine.  “I know what I want you to do for me.”

You swallowed and braced yourself as he pulled you even closer, looking right into your eyes.

“Tell me you love me,” he demanded.

You gasped, tears starting to burn at the back of your eyes.  It was the last thing you expected, but it also tracked.  Of course that was what he wanted.  But now that you were trying to form words and nothing would come out, you were kind of wishing he’d just said he wanted anal.

“D-daddy,” you stammered, distracted by him grabbing your hips and moving you even faster on top of him.  He was practically throwing you up and down on top of him, and somehow doing it effortlessly.

“Just say it,” he whispered.

“I love you,” you whispered back.  He smiled and pulled you into a deep kiss, swallowing every moan as you felt yourself barrelling towards your peak.

“Please, I’m about to come-- can I come, Daddy?”

“Almost,” he nodded, “say it again, babygirl.”

“I love you,” you panted, “Daddy, I love you, please--”

“One more time,” he grunted, watching your face. 

“I love you!” you yelped, unable to hold back your orgasm any longer and feeling your walls flutter as sensation washed over you.  Thankfully he wasn’t far behind, only thrusting up into you a few more times before he spilled himself with a groan.

He kissed you long and slow, staying inside you even as his cock began to soften a little.  When he pulled away, he looked up at you with an expression that brimmed with restrained excitement.

“Oh, doll, you have no idea how good it is to finally hear you say that,” he beamed.  “We’re gonna be so happy here together… just me and my best girl, right?”

“Right,” you smiled, but as soon as you blinked a tear was rolling down your cheek.  He wiped it away with his thumb.

“Don’t cry,” he soothed, “everything’s finally the way it’s supposed to be.  You’re finally where you belong, with me.”

You nodded weakly and felt whatever grip you had on your sanity loosening.  Dreams of escape faded as he carried you to bed, holding you in his arms all night long.  You were beginning to embrace the simplicity of just letting life happen to you.  For every time you felt belittled and patronized by his coddling, there was another time that you secretly felt protected and loved.  The truth was, even though you had experienced so much that you couldn’t begin to describe in the past week, you had been relieved of so much of the stress you dealt with before.  As you drifted to sleep, you only hoped that you could manage to hide that truth from yourself just a little bit longer.

~

He was honestly proud of himself for managing to keep his hands off you while you slept all this time.  But it wasn’t too much longer before you woke him up with your stirring.  At first he was just going to give you a quick hug and then get back to sleep, but then as he pulled you closer, he realized you were dreaming.  And when you moaned quietly in your sleep, he realized it wasn’t just any dream.

He smiled to himself as he kissed your neck gently, wondering if you would wake up or not.  It was sort of a win-win either way for him.  He let his hands slide down your body, listening to your breathing as it began to pick up.  Your mouth fell open and it made your sounds even more apparent as he carefully opened your legs.

“Oh baby, you’re drenched,” he murmured to no one in particular, admiring the way your pussy glistened in the low light of the room.  This was one of those times that he really appreciated his choice to make you sleep naked almost every night.

One metal finger sliding through your folds made you shiver.  He wondered if it was from arousal or if the metal felt cold on your warm skin.  Your clit was swollen, and apparently extra sensitive from the way your sleeping body erupted in goosebumps when he drew lazy circles around it.

Suddenly lacking in the patience more foreplay would require, he found himself shoving down his boxers and stroking his cock, preparing to push into you.  If that didn’t wake you up, he’d be slightly concerned… but he wasn’t sure if he’d be concerned enough to stop fucking you.  Thankfully he didn’t have to face that dilemma because the second he was pressing his head into your opening, your eyes flew open.

“Daddy!” you yelped, your voice sounding a little strange as you were torn from your sleep.

He bottomed out and groaned softly, relishing how tightly you wrapped around him.  “You looked so beautiful, baby, I couldn’t help myself.”

You mewled but said nothing, only wrapping your hands around his biceps as he pulled back to thrust into you again.  

“What were you dreaming about?” he asked firmly.

“N-nobody-- I mean, uh, nothing,” you stumbled over your words.

“Oh, you can’t lie to me very well can you?  It’s okay doll, you can tell me, but if it’s someone other than me I’m probably gonna kill him.”

He felt you tense up a little and he knew he’d scared you.  He sort of wanted to do it again, because he loved the way your cunt tightened in that moment, but he decided against it.

“Aw, I’m just joking,” he dismissed, though he wasn’t quite sure if he actually was or not.  “Go ahead, tell me what you were dreaming.”

“Y-you were there,” you explained, “but it wasn’t just you.”

“Is that so?”

“Um, yeah,” you deflected nervously.

“Go ahead, spit it out,” he hissed as he started to thrust into you a bit harder.  

“Well, uh, Steve was there too,” you finally admitted.  A lot of emotions hit him at once when he heard you say that.  Of course jealousy was prominent, but it was different than it would’ve been before... you were home now, and nobody could take you away.  Both of you knew that.  So it might have been a slight blow to the ego, but he didn’t see Steve as a threat.  What he did see was an opportunity to make you squirm, which he was always looking for.

“Was he watching us?” Bucky pressed.

“Uh, sort of…” you trailed off.

He leaned down, putting his lips right against your ear.  “Was he fucking you?”

You whimpered but he could tell you were turned on.  He reached down and roughly rubbed at your clit.  “Be honest, darling.”

“He wasn’t,” you explained, “you were; you said he wasn’t allowed to… but I gave him a-- a blowjob.”

As much as Bucky wasn’t exactly the sharing type, he was intrigued by the mental image of you stuffed with cock at both ends like that.  Even more so he was intrigued by the fact that it apparently turned you on.

“Is that what you want, huh?  One cock isn’t good enough for you?  Who knew you were such a fucking slut.”

“‘M not!” you denied.

“Then why are you soaked from dreaming about choking on somebody else’s cock while I fuck you, huh?”

“I didn’t mean to!”

“And how did you feel when I told Stevie he wasn’t allowed to fuck you?  Even in your sleep you know your Daddy owns you.  That this is my hole and I decide everything that happens to it.”

You moaned so loud that he was afraid he would come right then and there.  You sounded like heaven.  He thrust into you as hard and deep as he could, slamming into your cervix and hitting your clit with his pelvis with each brutal motion.  You cried out and dug your nails into his skin.  

“Fuck, you like it rough don’t you?  Of course you do.  ‘Cause you’re Daddy’s needy little whore.”

“Yes, I’m close!” you yelped.

“Doesn’t matter, I’m not gonna let you come until you beg for it.  Seems like you need to remember that I’m the only one for you.”

“Just you, Daddy, I only want you!” you reassured, but he wasn’t buying it.

“I’d die before I let you get on your knees for another man, do you believe me babygirl?”

“Yes, I know Daddy, I’m yours, there’s nobody else.”

“If you wanna come you better start askin’ really nice,” he growled.

“Please, Daddy, I want you to make me come!  It feels so good, please…”

“Keep going.”

“You’re amazing, your cock feels amazing, I wanna come for you so bad--”

“Fuck, baby, beg me to use you.”

He knew you were flustered by that.

“I-- I don’t know how,” you protested.

“Oh come on, you’re dumb but you’re not that dumb,” he grinned.  “Just how I said it.”

“Use me,” you murmured in defeat, “please.”

“That’s it,” he praised, “just like that-- come for me, doll.”

You were so obedient, tightening around him and nearly screaming with pleasure the moment he commanded you to.  He wasn’t far behind, succumbing to the perfection of your wet heat and filling it with his climax.

“Fuck!” he groaned when he hit the peak of it, trying somehow to focus entirely on both the way you felt and the way you sounded.

Normally he cleaned you up after this but right now he wanted his come to leak out of you all night, make your thighs and the sheets sticky.  Apparently you had some sort of implant or something which kept you safe… he was trying not to count the days until it wore off.  He figured you would totally lose it if he told you that he wanted to get you pregnant, and yet, he was surprised that you hadn’t asked him about getting your implant replaced.

~

You knew that life was unpredictable and all that, but if never in a million years would you have expected for the Winter Soldier to be painting your nails.  But there he was, focused intently on each stroke of the tiny brush as he held your hand still.

“This’ll help you stop chewing your nails,” he gave as his excuse.  It was almost believable, except that he did your toes too.  Amazingly enough, you’d never chewed on those.

They were actually sort of pretty, if you were being honest.  You admired them a little, as they dried.  It wasn’t a perfect paint job by any means, but much better than you expected from Bucky and honestly, a bit better than you would’ve done it in all likelihood.  The baby pink color was a little nauseating as always, but it admittedly did look nice with your skin tone. 

“What do you say?” he prompted.

“Thank you, Daddy,” you smiled.  “It looks nice.”

“You’re welcome, angel.  I think so too.  We’ll take ‘em for a spin when they’re dry.”

You swallowed.  You had a pretty good idea of what that would entail.

Next was your hair.  Pigtails, the way he always did it.  You never quite understood what he liked so much about turning you into a girlier, more childish version of yourself, but you were finally embracing the things that you liked about being in this role.  He certainly pampered you, which was hard to complain about.  In your whole time here (you struggled to keep track but it must have been over a month now) you'd never cooked once.

After lunch he had you on your knees, looking up at him while you started to unzip his fly.  You found yourself salivating a little as you pulled his half-hard cock out of his boxers.

“Baby, your hands are so small…” he noticed reverently.  “Barely fit around it.”

“It’s not that they’re small, it’s that you’re so big,” you replied, more honest than you were used to being with him.

“You flatter me,” he grinned.  “Do it some more.”

You felt put on the spot, but feared disappointing him.  “Daddy, your cock is… so big,” you improvised, still stroking him as he got harder for you, “I can’t believe it fits inside me.”

“Hmm, it almost doesn’t,” he recalled.

“But it feels so good when-- when I get used to you and, um, your cock… stretches me…”

He groaned a little, and you moved your hand faster.

“Fills me up so good, Daddy,” you moaned, getting more into it than you had intended to.  “Your cock feels so fucking good, it’s like it’s made for me--”

He cut you off suddenly by pushing you back onto the mattress, hovering over you as a muscular hand wrapped around your throat.

“Got quite the mouth on ya, doll,” he growled.  “Do I need to wash it out with soap?” 

You shook your head; he wasn’t choking you hard enough to stop you from speaking entirely if you had really wanted to, but you were too stunned to say much.  His attitude could flip on a dime like this, and you could never see it coming.  The fear made your heart race; the anticipation made your thighs clench together.  

He smiled as he pulled back, letting go of your neck and reaching for his cock instead.  “I can tell you’re worked up.  Go ahead, touch yourself.”

You hesitated because typically that would be an infraction, but he nodded for you to continue as you nervously reached between your legs.   

You gasped softly when you touched your clit: it was swollen, and especially sensitive.  You hadn't realized how turned on you really were.  Slowly, you started to rub circles around it as your hips rocked with your movements.

"Does it feel good?" he asked, and when you looked up at him, he was stroking himself as well.  You nodded quickly.  "'M gonna come on that pretty face, little one.  Beg me for it."

"Daddy…" you murmured in shock, "I… want you to come on my face, please.  Wanna be covered in it."

"You're not a good liar," he grinned.  "I know you really want me to fuck you."

He wasn't wrong, so you nodded again and watched his hand speed up as it moved up and down his length.

"You poor thing," he cooed.  "I fuck you daily and you're so disappointed to be going without, to just be getting my come on your face like the dirty little whore you are."

His words stung but your hand was moving faster between your legs.

"You're getting close, aren't you?  Wait until I'm ready," he ordered.  You swallowed dryly but slowed down a little to buy yourself some time.  

He grunted a bit and you really hoped it was signalling an orgasm because you felt yours building unstoppably.  You didn't even think you could pull your hand away from yourself if he asked you to, you needed to come so bad.

"Fuck, open your mouth baby-- stick your tongue out," he commanded quickly, stepping forward until his cock was casting a shadow over your face.  "Oh god, just like that… ready baby?"

You nodded one more time and heard yourself panting loudly through your open mouth, your moans only interrupted by a wince as his come spurted forward and painted your face and exposed tongue in hot stripes.  Your orgasm hit just in time, embarrassingly spurred on by the degrading position you were in.  

When he was done-- which seemed to take forever because he came so much-- he started to catch his breath before slipping his softening cock onto your come-coated tongue and into your waiting mouth.

"Mm, you look so good like this," he praised, "I'm not sure I wanna let you wipe it off."

A flesh thumb moved down to your cheek and rubbed a stray drop of spend into your skin.  

"My perfect little cum dumpster, huh?" he said proudly, as if it was an award or achievement or something, and not a sick, insulting term.

Weird thing was, you felt proud of yourself, too.

~

He’d been working outside all day, chopping firewood in preparation for the upcoming winter.  Sure, the cabin had heating, but he had a lot of ideas about cuddling in front of the fire, or maybe making love beside it.  

Regardless, even super soldiers tire and must rest after working.  He decided to head inside and heat up something warm to stave off the cold.  You were still sleeping last he’d checked, exhausted from a long night-- yes, that kind of long night.  He almost felt guilty for putting your body through so much…  you were so delicate, sometimes he forgot you couldn’t always handle what he could.  However, you were stronger than you realized, and such a perfectly obedient little girl; he smiled at the memory of your skin under his fingertips, your fragile form writhing and whimpering beneath him as he’d taken you for hours.  As he daydreamed and began to enter the kitchen, he was torn from his imagination by a sound from your room.  At first he wondered if he’d misheard it, but when he heard you cry out again, he assumed you were hurt and nearly tripped over himself to run to you.  His heart was racing and he almost considered reaching for his sidearm-- there was no way someone could’ve broken in and tried to hurt you, right?

But as he flung open the door, instead he found you alone with your hand between your legs.  You jumped up when you saw him, but it was too late.

“The fuck are you doing?!” he exclaimed, climbing onto the bed and trapping you before you could crawl backwards away from him.

“I-- I was just--”

He cut you off with a quick slap to the face.  Not to hurt you, just to get you to focus on him.

“You know you can’t touch yourself without my permission.  Did you forget?”

“No…” you murmured ashamedly.

“If you knew it was wrong, why did you do it?”

“I… I just missed you…”

“Why didn’t you call me for help?  I can’t take care of you if you don’t ask.”

“I knew you were busy, I didn’t want to bother you--”

“Show me what you did,” he growled, watching you sheepishly spread your legs again to reveal your wet pussy and swollen clit.  “Oh doll, you really did a number on yourself.  Did you come without me?”

You looked away.

“Don’t bother lying.  Did you make yourself come with your fingers?”

“Yes…” 

You were hiding something.  He almost didn’t want to know the entire truth because it was breaking his heart to know you’d disobeyed so severely, but he had to know what happened if he was going to discipline you properly.

“Was it more than once?”

You shook your head and his blood went cold upon the realization that you were hiding something worse.

“What were you thinking about?” he asked you slowly.  He could hear your breathing quickened and he was sure he might die if you said what he was afraid of.  “Answer me.”

“I was thinking about… being fucked…”

“By who?” he asked.  You opened your mouth instantly but he cut you off.  “Don’t lie.”

You spoke but it was so weak that it wasn’t even a whisper.  “What was that?” he pressed.

“Sam,” you finally relented, “it was Sam.”

He was livid, but at least it wasn’t Steve.  

“Go stand beside the bed and kneel,” he commanded firmly.  You nodded weakly and slithered out from under him to do as he asked.  

He took a deep, slow breath hoping to calm himself a little.  He had heard that you shouldn’t punish little girls when you’re angry.  But he needed to nip this in the bud.

He got off the bed and approached you after a moment, running a finger under your chin and guiding you to look up at him.

“You understand you’ve been very naughty, don’t you?” he asked with a cold fury tinting his voice.

“Yes, Daddy,” you answered.  Clearly you were trying to be extra good and dutiful, hoping that strict adherence to the rules from here on out could save you some pain.  You weren’t wrong, but he wished that you would’ve had that attitude a little sooner.

“And if I don’t teach you a lesson, that would be unfair to both of us.”

“Yes, Daddy.”

He sat down on the edge of the bed and opened his belt and fly, pulling out his cock.  He sensed that you were compelled to lean forward and take it in your mouth, but you stayed still; you knew he would tell you exactly what he wanted you to do.

As he stroked his cock to full hardness, he glared at you so intensely that you couldn’t keep his gaze, looking up briefly but always glancing back down to the floor shamefully.  

“I-I’m sorry, Da-” you began weakly.

“You’ll speak when spoken to,” he interjected harshly.  Finally, he held your jaw with one hand, the other holding his cock forward as he plunged it between your lips.  He moaned a little when you swirled your tongue over it, doing your best to coat every inch of it in wetness.

As quickly as he had pushed in, he pulled out again.  He slapped his cock on your face, smearing your own spit on your cheek.  He rubbed his tip over your lips in a circle, but when you opened up your mouth for him, instead he leaned forward and spit into your open mouth.

“Swallow it,” he demanded through his teeth, and you did though it made you shudder with disgust.

Only then did he shove his cock in again, and with brutal force as well.  He used fistfuls of your hair to pull your face up and down on his cock, ignoring your whimpers of pain.

The room was filled with the sounds of your choking and coughing, until those extended periods of silence when his cock was shoved all the way into your throat and you couldn’t even get enough air for that.  It was the sexiest thing he’d ever heard in his life.

When he pulled you off of him to look at your face, he grinned proudly.  “Doll, you look like a fuckin’ mess.”  And it was true; spit and pre-cum dribbling down your chin and onto the floor, red nose and puffy eyes from crying… truly a sight to behold.

He gave you one more slap for good measure, the fist in your hair preventing your head from spinning to the side.  

“Gonna fuckin’ come in your throat.  You’d better swallow it all, bitch.”

He could feel your whole body jerk when he said it, and it only served to make your throat even tighter around him.  

“Fuck,” he groaned, “just like that, choke on me, fuck, oh god, fuck--”

He came with a stuttered moan and the sounds of protest you tried to make were lost as cum filled your throat and mouth.  

He smiled when you swallowed quickly, determined to obey.  He wasn’t even done coming yet and you were swallowing it.  Probably a good strategy; he had been pent up for a while now and he probably could’ve filled your tiny mouth until it was leaking.

When he was sure every drop of come had been spilled and swallowed, he pulled out and gave you some reprieve.  You gasped for air loudly, coughing a few times but mostly maintaining your composure like the good little slut you were.

He watched you shift your hip uncomfortably and realized you must be quite agitated yourself.

“If you want something from me, just ask,” he encouraged.  “That’s the whole point of this, isn’t it?”

“Please fuck me,” you whimpered.

He wagged his finger disapprovingly.  “I don’t know if you deserve it.”

“Please!” you yelped, and he yanked you off the floor and into his lap quickly.

“You get so dumb when you need me,” he growled into your ear.  “So desperate that you don’t know how to think about anything else but cock.  Isn’t that right?”

You nodded with a gasp.

“You’re my dumb little baby, aren’t you?  Say it," he hissed in demand.

“I’m your dumb little baby,” you repeated breathlessly.

“Get on your hands and knees and get that ass up.”

You obeyed quickly, almost eagerly, and he grinned at your obedience.  You really needed it bad, and he was helpless but to oblige you.  As soon as he was on his knees behind you and lining up with your sopping entrance, he was shoving his cock into you all at once.

You yelped at the brutality of the intrusion; he stayed still for a moment, relishing the feeling of your warmth, before pulling back out again.

“Wh-?” you began to protest in confusion, but he was a step ahead of you.

“That was just to get my cock wet, baby.”

One metal finger slipped into your puckered hole and you yelped.  “D-daddy, not there!”

“Shhh, just relax,” he soothed.

“It’s gonna hurt,” you whined.

“That’s sort of the idea,” he explained.  “I know what you can handle, doll.”

“And I can handle this?”

“I never said that.”

And with only one more finger and a few more minutes of hasty preparation, he was pushing his cock into your tighter hole.

“Shh,” he soothed when he felt you clench around him, but still pushing forward, indifferent to your hiss of pain.  

“It hurts!” you sobbed.

“I know baby, you’re just gonna have to take it.  This wouldn’t be happening if you had just asked me to help you.”

You pouted and it was equal parts adorable and pathetic.  “I’m sorry!”

“I’ll tell you when it’s time to apologize.  Right now you just need to be quiet.  Don’t you wanna be a good little girl?”

“Y-yes.”

He started to move his cock inside you and you shivered under him.  

“Please come,” you begged weakly after a few more minutes of thrusting.

“You wanna get it over with?  Don’t like it?”

You nodded and he did feel bad for you, but he knew it was what you needed.

“I’ll come when I’m ready, doll.  Just take Daddy’s cock, ‘s all you’re good for anyways, right angel?”

You nodded and bit back another sob, blissfully unaware of his adoring gaze; you looked so cute crying for his cock.  He liked being strong enough to hurt you almost as much as he liked being strong enough to protect you.

“My perfect little crybaby,” he cooed.  “Don’t whine too much or I’ll have to stuff that filthy mouth with a paci, alright?”

He watched you bite your lip and try to stay calm.  Out of pity, he moved a little slower than he wanted to, giving you some more time to adjust.  Eventually he felt you relaxing, though you still yelped a little when he pushed in all the way.  It was hard to choose between watching your face or watching his cock stretch open your hole.

“God, you’re takin’ me so well,” he praised.  “Who knew you were such a whore, huh?”

Before you could deny it, he reached down and swiped his fingers through your folds quickly, groaning when he felt how swollen and wet they were.  “Fuck, baby, you’re drenched.  You like getting fucked up the ass; such a dirty little slut.”

“Just for you, Daddy,” you informed him with a weak voice.  He was still angry with you, of course, but he was so proud of you, too.  He could remember all those times you’d tried to run or fight, now you were just laying there and taking it like a champ-- no restraints, no threats, just the desire to be good for him.  You were everything he’d ever dreamed you could be and more.

The thought spurred his orgasm ahead sooner than he expected, but he still wanted to hold back.  You needed more to learn your lesson, and he wanted to savor this feeling as long as possible.

His fingers had been digging into the supple flesh of your hips and ass, hard enough to bruise, but you felt too warm and too soft, so he gripped the sheets instead in his attempts to stave off his rupture.

But it wasn’t much longer until the tightness of you, the heat of you, the sweetness of your sobs all became too perfect to ignore.  His cock was aching for release, and if he denied himself much more, he figured his balls would never relax from their tightened state.

“I think you’re ready to apologize now,” he groaned.

“I’m so sorry, Daddy,” you sobbed.  “I swear, I’ll never touch myself without your permission again-- and I’ll never think about anybody but you!  I only want you, I swear!”

“You sure, baby?  You don’t think Sam would treat you better?” he mocked.  Sam definitely would be nicer to you, but there was no way he could treat you better than Bucky did.  Maybe you wanted a guy who was sweeter, more traditional, but this was what you needed and only your Daddy could give that to you.

“I’m sure!  I only want you, please!  Please, please come.”

“Is that what you want, angel?  Want me to come in your tight little ass?”

“Please,” you whimpered.

“Please…?”

“Please, Daddy.”

And he came, though it was a little more physically taxing since it was the second of the night.  You whimpered a little but he could tell you were relieved it was over.

You didn’t put up any fight at bath time that night, just curled into his arms and let him wash you as you whispered more apologies.  

“Shh, it’s alright,” he soothed as he washed your hair, whispering right against your ear before giving it a little kiss.  “You did good, baby.  You made a mistake but you’re gonna learn from it and we’re gonna be better than ever.  You took your punishment so well, darling, you should be proud.”

~

Today you'd woken up to an empty house, with a note on the kitchen table:

Gone for groceries, I'll be back in the afternoon.  When I get home, greet me at the door wearing what I've laid out for you in your closet.

You figured it wasn't going to be something conservative by any means, but you were still taken aback by finding a tail, collar, and cat-ear headband.  The collar was pink leather with a tiny bell and a little heart-shaped steel tag with your name on it.  The realization that he had this custom-made sent a shiver down your back.  On the back of the tag was another engraving:

IF LOST RETURN TO BUCKY BARNES

You were a little concerned about wearing only a collar, ears and tail… especially when you realized how the tail was intended to be worn.

Still, you had become thoroughly obedient, and you trusted that this would make him happy which was all you could hope for.  You fought past your hesitation and changed out of your pajamas into the outfit (if it could even be called that when it contained no actual clothing).

He had the biggest grin on his face when he opened the door to find you on your knees just outside the entryway.

“Oh look at you, kitten,” he beamed.

Being naked on the floor was cold and awkward.  You crossed your arms to cover your chest, frowning as you tried to avoid his penetrating gaze.  “This is stupid.  I feel stupid.”

“You are stupid," he smiled.  "But you look great!  Now behave or you’ll have to eat out of a bowl on the floor until you’ve learned to love being Daddy’s pet.”

Your eyes went wide.

“You’re gonna behave, right?”

“Y-yes, Daddy.”

He smiled and curled his finger, motioning for you to come closer.  You awkwardly crawled towards him on your hands and knees, biting your lip absent-mindedly.  When you were on the floor in front of his legs, he knelt down a bit and grabbed a handful of your ass.  It made the plug inside you shift and you whimpered.

“Mm, this tail looks lovely on you,” he praised.  “And the ears… you’re a natural.”

“Thank you, Daddy,” you shyly accepted the compliment.

"I bet you got wet putting this on, huh?" he presumed.  You nodded as he moved to rub two fingers through your folds, proving himself right.

When he leaned back and pulled his cock from his jeans, you were surprised at how hard it already was.  Clearly the kitten thing was working for him.

"Go ahead kitty, I know you want a taste," he encouraged.

You leaned forward and gave, fittingly, small kitten licks to the tip of his cock and he groaned.  “Just like that, fuck.”

You hummed when you tasted his pre-cum on your tongue.  You’d gotten so accustomed to it that you actually enjoyed the flavor now.

Hesitantly, you wrapped your lips around the head and suckled on it gently.  Apparently, he didn’t care much for the slow-but-steady method; he slipped two fingers under your collar and used it to pull you down further until you choked.  

He continued to guide you forward and back, moaning every time your throat accepted the leaking head of his cock.

“You don’t want me to come in your mouth, do you?” he asked with a grunt.

You shook your head.  

He grinned knowingly, pushing you back until your mouth was empty and free to respond.  “Where do you want it?” 

“In my pussy.”

“Full sentences only, please.”

“I want you to come in my pussy, Daddy, please.”

“Hmm, you did ask very nicely,” he smiled.  “But I have something else to do first.  Go get on the couch, kitten, hands and knees.”

You almost stood up but realized he wanted you to crawl again.  As soon as you’d done it, he was behind you, humming contentedly as he ran his rough hands over your skin.  You mewled when he started to kiss along your back, down your ass and between your thighs until he was licking long stripes through your folds.  Both of you moaned when he sucked your clit into his mouth, even allowing it to graze against his teeth which nearly hurt but made you gush with wetness anyways.

"Please-- I'm close, Daddy, can I come?" you whimpered.

"Go ahead," he mumbled before returning to his work, knowing exactly how to use his tongue to take you apart in mere minutes.  Your hands grabbed desperately at the back of the couch for stability as your legs began to quiver with the force of your orgasm.  You yelped and bit down on your lip as it crashed over you; sometimes when he ate you out, he wouldn't stop after you'd came and keep going until you were begging for mercy, but he was apparently feeling generous today and stopped once you'd finished.

That, of course, did not mean he was finished with you.

He pushed his jeans down to his thighs and laid back onto the mattress, cock so hard that it was pressing into his abs.

“Come on kitten, ride me,” he grinned, motioning for you to climb on top of him.  The moment you did he was rubbing his cock against you, pushing it upwards for you to sink down onto it.  You moaned as it stretched you open, and when your hips met his, the tip of it brushed against the deepest places inside you.  You yelped and tried to move back up but he suddenly grabbed your legs and held you down.

“Nuh-uh, kitten, no running away.  You’re gonna take all of me.”

“It’s too deep,” you protested weakly, even though you felt your walls throbbing with pleasure.

“Not at all, angel; you’re made for me, so you fit me perfectly,” he explained.  “If I let you go, you’re gonna ride me properly, take my whole cock, right?”

You nodded and he eased up his grip.  You felt your legs shaking as little as you pushed yourself up only to drop back down, wincing as he filled you so completely once again.  You repeated the movement over and over, picking up pace and moaning every time.  You could feel his cock moving the plug inside your ass, and each bounce on top of him made your collar jingle a little.

You did your best to keep up the pace, but to lift yourself required use of a muscle that you clearly hadn't been getting much exercise for; it wasn't more than a few minutes before you were faltering, your moans of pleasure accented with the struggling groans of exhaustion.

"Oh kitty, are you too weak?  Too wimpy and small to ride my cock?  Baby… that's pathetic," he moped.

"I'm sorry, Daddy," you pouted.  "I'm just tired…"

"Just a little longer, kitten, just ride my cock a little more then I'll help you out, okay?  I know you can do it.  I know you can be a good girl."

You hoped he was right.  You nodded weakly as he looked at you expectantly, before slowly beginning to move again in spite of your sore thighs.

Soon, as he'd promised, he pulled you down and wrapped his arms around you, thrusting up into you.  Your moans echoed against his skin when your face was shoved into the crook of his neck.  When his cock slammed into your most sensitive spot, you bit him there as a way to stifle yourself and he slapped your ass.

“Only bad kittens bite, doll.  I thought you were going to be a good kitten for me?”

“Feels so good,” you tried to explain though it came out slurred, “please don’t stop.”

“I’m not gonna stop, baby.  Not gonna stop until that pussy is full of my come.  That what you want?”

“Yes,” you pleaded, “oh god, yes, please…”

He moaned loudly as his thrusts lost all rhythm, his cock moving so fast inside you that the sensation became one hot blur against your walls.  Finally, as he groaned and gripped you tight enough to bruise, he spilled inside you. 

As he let out a long breath and his body relaxed under you, he smiled softly.  "You really are perfect, pet."

"C-can I take off the ears now?  And the tail?"

"Hmm, not yet," he grinned, "we need to take a few pictures of you like this first."

~

He was working in the kitchen when he heard your footsteps approaching.

"Don't come in here!" he ordered you.  "Wait for me at the dining table."

"Why, Daddy?" he heard you respond from the hall.  He smiled just to hear your sweet voice.

"It's a surprise, babydoll," he explained.  "It's almost ready-- just wait, okay?"

"Okay, Daddy," you answered dutifully, your footsteps moving to the dining area as he'd requested.

Stepping back and admiring his work, he lifted it and turned out the door to deliver your surprise: a cake, with pink frosting and one pink candle.

Your eyes lit up when you saw him holding the cake stand, being careful not to tilt it or get the flame of the candle near his long hair.

He smiled and set it in front of you, looking to your face for a reaction.  Suddenly he felt self-conscious about it, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.   "Um, I made it myself.  Sorry if the decorating isn't that nice…"

"It's beautiful, Daddy, and I bet it'll taste great, too," you beamed.  "What's the occasion?"

"It's our anniversary," he replied, his voice suddenly low and dark.

He saw recognition cross your face, though you looked confused as well.  The meds he'd given you throughout the year had disrupted your memories, and probably distorted your perception of the passage of time as well, but it was all necessary to get you compliant.  He hoped reminding you of that somewhat violent first day wouldn't set back any of your progress.

"I've… been here a year?" you asked weakly.

"We've been here a year," he corrected, sitting down beside you and wrapping an arm around you, "but that's not what we're celebrating."

The hand on your shoulder slipped down to the underside of your arm, stroking it slowly.

"We're celebrating that a medication somebody gave you a long time ago, before we were together, is finally worn off," he explained slowly, a grin creeping across his face. "We're celebrating that the next time I come inside you, I'm gonna get you pregnant."

He didn't fuck you for three days after that, loving the way you were clearly on edge as you waited for him to make good on his promise.  And he didn't blame you for being nervous about it, even if you seemed to understand that any protest from you would fall on deaf ears.

So, he was quite taken aback when you came onto him one night, bedtime cuddling quickly turning into something more as you rubbed your ass against his crotch.  He hadn't even realized that you would want it all on your own.

God, you were so fucking perfect he couldn't stand it.

"What are you doing, angel?" he asked you with a growl as he grabbed your hips and forced them to still.

"Nothing, Daddy," you answered coyly.  He grinned and nipped at your earlobe.

"Are you horny, babygirl?  Because you're acting like a whore."

You nodded and gasped, shivering under his touch.

"Want Daddy's cock inside you?" he pressed, voice getting darker.

"Yes, please!" you begged.

He sat up and flipped you onto your back, caging you in with his arms as he hovered above you.

“You wanna have my baby?” he asked in a husky whisper.

“Yes,” you nodded your head quickly.

“Want me to knock you up, doll?  Right now?”

“Please,” you whimpered.

He leaned down, almost close enough to kiss you, as his gaze wandered over your face  “I don’t want it to be like the other times.  None of the crazy shit, nothing rough.  If I’m gonna get you pregnant--”

“Whatever you want,” you pleaded.

He kissed you suddenly, deep and slow.  “I love you,” he told you quickly as he pulled back, breathless but confident.  

“I love you too,” you answered without even questioning it.

He was gentle, and thorough, and patient.  It was love-making in a way that was out of character for him.  He lifted your legs to wrap around his hips, pushing into you as deep as he could but with a contemplative slowness; he cradled your face in his hands and kissed all over it as he praised you in whispers.

My pretty girl, my perfect little girl, gonna fill you up, gonna make you mine.

You were only moans and sobs, your arms wrapping around his neck to pull him closer.  

The first time you came was unexpected, building slowly but crashing into you all at once, judging by the way you went from softly whimpering to nearly screaming in seconds.  The second was quieter, more subtle, but he could tell by the way your walls tightened around him.  The third left you in tears, beyond overstimulated and broken down into a babbling mess.

“Please,” you cried, “please I need you to come-- come inside me.”

He struggled to resist that offer, but he didn't want it to be over too quickly.

“Soon,” he promised, “I’m close.  You feel so good.”

You wrapped a hand around the back of his neck, pulling him close for a kiss but stopping as his mouth brushed against yours.

“Please, Bucky… please come…” you whispered.

He moaned, his thrusts getting a little more erratic.

“Need it so bad,” you whimpered, “need you to put your baby in me--”

“Fuck,” he hissed, “‘m gonna, promise.”

“Now,” you demanded through your teeth, “I need it now.”

“Not until you come one more time,” he responded.  You whined and he knew you were questioning whether it was possible.  “I know you can, just gimme one more.”

His angle shifted and he stayed deep within you, grinding his hips on yours just the right way to rub your clit with his pubic bone.  Your back arched but he held you close, barraging you with the sensation and pressing his forehead to yours.

Your hands gripped his shoulders for dear life, as if you were afraid to fall.  He smiled and kissed your neck, feeling your walls flutter around him once again.

“That’s it,” he praised, “I know you’re close.  Just let go.  I’ve got you.”

Tears streamed down your face as it tore through you, hitting you so hard that instead of moans it was just silence.  He watched your face intently, breathing through his teeth as he summoned all his willpower to hold on just a little longer.  

"Daddy!" you yelped, and he couldn't take any more: with a high-pitched, stuttered moan, he felt his cock flexed as he came harder than maybe he ever had before.  Knowing that you were fertile made it all so much more intense.  Normally, his orgasm just meant the end of sex-- maybe just for a few minutes on a good day.  But now?  Now it was the beginning of something.  His perfect little angel was going to finally fulfill her final purpose and give him a baby.  He'd waited so long, dreamed of it every day for years, and finally it was going to happen.  

He refused to pull out or let you move until he was sure it would take; he killed the time by kissing every part of your face and neck that he could reach.

He hadn't even gotten you pregnant yet, technically, and he already couldn't wait for more children.  He'd always wanted to have a big family, but he gave up on that dream years ago; meeting you had brought it all back, and made him realize that all this time he'd just been waiting for the perfect wife to start it with.

You were well worth the wait.

[spine-buster]

Patience is a Virtue ft. Matthew Tkachuk | 𝒫𝒶𝓉𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒸𝑒

gif credit @czarniks

CONTENT WARNING: this story deals with cults, polygamous cults, escaping cults, strict adherence to religion, gender roles, abuse, miscarriage, and a character with a traumatic past.  Please be warned.

Word Count: 2,899

A/N: Was I really going to name the epilogue any thing else?

                                                         *     *     *     *     *

Effie had been quiet lately.  When Matthew said ‘quiet’, what he really meant to say was not all there, and when he said ‘not all there’ what he really meant to say was that she was there, with him physically, but her mind was somewhere else.  She had these bouts from time to time.  Effie was always going to be a work in progress, and that meant sometimes she’d regress instead.  He knew that when he signed up to be with her ten years ago now.  He knew that when he raised the idea of buying and building a house together seven years ago, and she said no.  He knew that when he raised the idea of buying and building a house together six years ago and she said no.  He knew that when he raised the idea of buying and building a house together five years ago and she said no.  He knew that when he raised the idea of buying and building a house together four years ago and she said no.  He knew thar when he raised the idea of buying and building a house together three years ago and she said yes.  He knew that when they moved in to said house two years ago.  Some bouts were long, some were short, but he always noticed them.  

This was another one.

She usually came around.  Well, actually, she almost always came around.  She’d ask something or propose an idea and Matthew would learn or realize why she was so withdrawn, why she was so quiet.  Sometimes they were simple, and a short bout: “I want to change the menu at the bakery.”  Sometimes they were vastly more complex, and a long bout: “I know Chantal’s okay with me not having kids, but what about Keith?”  She’d get stuck in her head a lot.  And with someone with so much to learn, as someone who was quite literally going through life learning by doing, it was almost a guarantee this would happen, considering what she came from.  

But Matthew was there.  Always.  

As he spooned her in bed, he could feel how distant she was.  He could practically feel her mind racing and refusing to slow down despite it being late at night.  Matthew placed a small kiss on her shoulder.  “D’you want to talk about it?” he offered.

Effie turned around so she was now facing him.  He could see the worried look in her eyes and started to worry himself.  She took a deep breath.  “Would you want to marry me?”

Matthew licked his lips, and without hesitation, he nodded his head.  “Yes.”

Effie looked away, almost ashamed.  “I had it in my head that you wouldn’t want to because I’ve been married before,” she whispered.

A regress.  Inevitable.  Effie’s mind was a complex ocean.  “You were never married,” he said firmly.  “But if you want to get married, I’d love to marry you.  We could do it however you wanted.”

“What about our marriage?”

“What do you mean?”

“We’d get married, but what would our marriage be like?”

Bad memories, obviously.  The last time she was a “wife” it wasn’t a marriage at all.  It was practically a hostage situation.  An abusive relationship.  “Do you like our relationship how it is now?” Matthew asked.  

Effie nodded her head.  “I want it to stay like this,” she said.

“Then that’s what our marriage will be like, too,” Matthew assured her.

***

“I don’t know what type of ring I like,” Effie mumbled on the phone to Geneviève as she picked at her lunch, a poppyseed bagel she’d made with a generous spread of lox and cream cheese.  Geneviève was in Sweden, like she was every summer, with Jacob and her twins.  Though they’d be back in a few weeks for the season, Effie couldn’t hold off talking to her.  She never really could.

“Why would that matter?” Geneviève asked.

“Matthew and I talked about getting married.”

There was silence on the other end of the call before Effie heard the dial tone.  She thought the call dropped – it did that sometimes, especially when Geneviève was in Sweden – but then her phone was vibrating all over again, and it was a FaceTime request instead of a simple phone call.  Effie couldn’t help but smile as she accepted the call.

“You and Matthew WHAT?!” Geneviève shrieked, holding the phone too close to her face.  

“Um…yeah,” Effie nodded.  “We talked about it a few nights ago in bed.  I asked him if he would want to marry me and he said yes.”

“Effie, Matthew’s probably wanted to marry you since he told you how to pronounce tomahawk.  What made you think he didn’t?” Geneviève asked.

Effie shrugged her shoulders.  “I don’t know…” she said.  “I just—last time I was married, it wasn’t a good marriage.”

“You were never married,” Geneviève deadpanned.  It was good to know she thought the same thing as Matthew.  “But besides that—has Matthew been anything like him in these past ten years?”

Effie shook her head.  “No way.”

“Then what makes you think he will when you’re married?”

Effie knew Geneviève was trying to make a point – and a good one – but Effie was, for some reason, still apprehensive.  “He comes home soon,” she said.  “I’m going to talk to him more about it.”

Geneviève nodded in understanding.  “Just remember that you deserve happiness, however that comes to you,” she reminded Effie.  “And remember, Effie – you can choose happiness, too.  You can choose to overcome a fear and make yourself happy.”

***

Effie searched all about engagement rings until she heard the garage door open and Matthew step into the house.  He’d been at the gym, and his own lox and cream cheese bagel was waiting for him in the fridge.  “Hey,” he called out from the laundry room.  

“Hi.”

“Whatcha up to?”

“Uh, looking at engagement rings.”

He was silent.  Silent until he rounded the corner and Effie saw him emerge from the hallway that led to the laundry room, his gym bag slung over his shoulder.  “Engagement rings, huh?”

“Mhm,” she nodded, adjusting herself in the bar stool.  “There’s so many different styles.”

Matthew looked at her skeptically, dropping his gym bag before walking over to her.  “There are…” he began.  “But you should look at a style or styles you like, and then we can bring it to a jeweler.”

“A jeweler?”

“I’m not gonna get you just any ring, baby.  It’s gonna be custom made,” he said like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Effie’s research told her that custom made rings were the most expensive types of rings.  While there were so many pretty styles online, custom was definitely something to aspire to for many people, even thought it was out of reach.  “You’d get me a custom ring?”

Matthew looked at her.  Without saying a word, he leaned back into the barstool beside her but grabbed hers and scooted it closer to him.  “Will you please talk to me?” he asked softly, but needily.  “You know I’d get you a custom ring.  You know I’m gonna let you get any dress you want and have whatever kind of wedding you want.  You brought up marriage but the questions you’ve been asking me…Effie, it’s as if you think I don’t love you.”

“That’s not—no,” she shook her head, stuttering out her words.  “I’m sorry, Matthew.  I don’t mean it to be like that.  I know you love me.”

“Then what’s with the questions?”

Effie took a deep breath, avoiding eye contact with Matthew until she knew she had to talk.  “This is what it was like last time.”

Matthew’s heart dropped into the pit of his stomach.  “What do you mean?”

“Abraham was nice before he abused me.  He promised me so many things.  And I know you’re not him—you’re nothing like him—and I’ve—I’ve told you that for ten years but—”

“—Effie, if this is too much for you, we don’t have to get married.”

Effie began shaking her head.  And when she began shaking her head, tears started to well up in her eyes, and as they welled up, they fell down her cheeks.  She tried wiping them away but Matthew beat her to it; she was so ashamed she couldn’t even look at him.  “But everybody gets married.  Look at Brady.  And Taryn, even.”

“Effie…we’re already in a committed relationship that’s like a marriage anyway.  I’m devoted to you, and you’re devoted to me…we—we live together, we act like we’re married anyway.  If you don’t want to change that then you don’t have to.”

“Yes I do,” she stressed.

“Why?”

“I do because I want to do something for you.  You’ve been doing things for me for ten years and I know you want this.  I know you want to get married.  So I want to give that to you because you’ve given me so much.”

“You giving me yourself is enough.  You know that.  You’re enough,” he said.

“I know,” she nodded.  “But marriage is a celebration of love.  It’s a celebration of love.  And I want to celebrate our love.  I just have to get it through my thick skull that marriage isn’t a punishment, it’s a celebration.”

Matthew nodded his head, giving her a quick kiss on the nose.  “Want me to call Dr. Barlow?  We can work on this together.”

Effie nodded.

***

Half a year later, Effie couldn’t stop staring at the rock on her finger.  It glimmered in even the shittiest light.  She was sure Matthew had something put in it to make it shine so much, but he kept denying it.  Geneviève loved it.  So did Jenna.  So did Annica.  

“But do you?” Matthew asked her.

She nodded.  The second he slipped it on to her finger, everything became real.  Everything.  She’d never had an engagement ring before.  She never had a testament to her partner’s love for her.  And here it was now, on her finger, ready for her to wear for the rest of her life.  Matthew gave it to her.  Her Matthew.  Nobody else but her Matthew.

***

“Oooooooh, Effie,” Chantal’s eyes lit up as Effie walked out of the fitting room of the small bridal boutique in St. Louis they went to on a whim.  Taryn’s jaw dropped in quick succession as Effie walked out and stood on the platform in front of them, a three-panel mirror showing her every angle of the dress.  She watched Chantal through the mirror.  “Oh Effie, this is stunning.”

“Do you think Matthew will like it?” she asked.  

“Matthew’s gonna bawl,” Taryn interjected, causing everyone to laugh.  “I’m about to bawl!”

Effie looked at herself in the mirror, patting down the fronts of the dress, even though it fit her like a glove.  Despite trying on some dresses already while out with Jenna and Geneviève, she didn’t get the same butterflies in her stomach as she did seeing herself in this dress, now, even though this wasn’t planned.  It was the first one Effie chose for their consultant to pull but the last one of the three she tried on, and it was the most beautiful.  She loved everything about it: the eyelet organza, the corset bodice with exposed boning, the A-line skirt with pockets.

The ivory.

The consultant puffed out the skirt for her, letting it fall behind her dramatically.  Effie was quiet as she watched Taryn eye the consultant and say “We need a veil” before the consultant left them alone.  Chantal was covering her mouth at the point, admiring the dress but also as a mechanism to stop herself from crying, probably.  Effie pat down the front of the dress again, her heart beating in her chest.  “Chantal?” her voice was small.

“Yes sweetie?”

“I can wear white, right?”

Chantal nodded automatically.  So did Taryn.  “Of course you can.  You were never married,” Chantal said.

“Even if you had been,” Taryn piped in, “it’s your wedding.  You can wear whatever you want.”

***

Matthew held Effie’s hand as they sat on a couch in Dr. Barlow’s office together, talking through Effie’s trepidations of marriage and expectations as a wife.  Effie knew that the only reason why she was having trouble with all of this was because of her past experiences; when she thought about it, deep down, she wanted nothing more than to marry Matthew.  But her mind was a funny thing – it always was – and that’s why they were here.  Matthew had been patient in waiting for her to agree to buy a house and move in together; he’d been even more patient in not asking her to get married but letting her make the decision herself.  Now it just all came down to this – the working through the nitty gritty things, the things that still plagued her mind – so she could go into the marriage in the healthiest way possible, just like their relationship was.  And she was going to see it that way.  It helped her immensely to see it that way.  This is just an extension of our relationship.  This is a celebration of our love.

“Have you given thought to any popular wedding or marriage traditions that the two of you would want to follow or not follow?” Dr. Barlow asked.

“Like what?” Matthew asked.

“Effie, will you be taking Matthew’s last name?”

Effie looked at Matthew before squeezing his hand quickly and nodding.  “Yes,” she said confidently.  “I’ll become Effie Tkachuk.  I met this woman through hockey – her husband plays for the Toronto Maple Leafs – her name is Bee Rielly.  She took her husband’s last name and she said the reason why she took it was because she had no connection to her maiden name, McTavish, because she had no real family and her mom was an alcoholic and it only really reminded her of that.  Considering her background, she wanted it gone, and I feel the same way.”

Matthew squeezed her hand back.  Dr. Barlow smiled and nodded her head.  “It’s great that you’ve met someone like that, that can help you see these kinds of things in that perspective,” she said.  “Are you having a church wedding?”

“No,” Matthew took this one.  Even though he and his siblings went to Catholic schools, religion wasn’t a huge part of their lives.  “Just an officiant.  We actually already have her booked.”

Dr. Barlow nodded again.  “Effie, how do you feel about the tradition of someone walking you down the aisle?  Levi?  Matthew’s dad, perhaps?”

Effie shook her head vehemently.  “I love them, but no,” she said.  “No way.  I’m entering into a marriage freely and I’m making the decision.  Nobody is giving me away.”

Matthew smiled.  “And that’s that on that.”

***

The more that Effie planned, the more she got to experience what normal wedding planning was like.  It was stressful, sure, but it wasn’t your-mom-telling-you-that-you-were-going-to-marry-a-55-year-old-when-you-were-fourteen-years-old type of stressful.  It wasn’t an I-don’t-know-anything-about-being-a-wife-I’m-only-fourteen-years-old type of fearful.  It actually wasn’t fearful at all.  The more decisions she made about how she was going to marry Matthew, the more excited she became.  Decisions about flowers, about table coverings, about décor, about music, about food.  Her favourite was taste-testing cakes samples with Matthew.  Every time they tasted something Matthew would always say, “It’s not as good as your cakes” to her.  

Every.  Single.  Time.  

***

Between family, friends, and teammates, there were about 130 people at the wedding.  Effie wore her dress, tailored to perfection, and the veil – long and regal and cathedral length, because the only day it was socially acceptable to wear a veil that long was on your wedding day, and Effie was going to take full advantage of it.  They did a first look and Matthew cried.  He cried again when she walked down the aisle by herself.  

When Effie stood holding hands with Matthew, reciting vows to each other, she thought about the past ten years.  She thought about the person she was when she met him at Noah’s birthday party.  She thought about their Starbucks meetings and him teaching her about corn dogs and candy and frappucinos.  She thought about how different she was from then till now, and that though the past still affected her, and crept up on her from time to time, she had been strong back then, and was even stronger now, and that made her proud of herself in a way nobody else could understand.  Not even Matthew.  That she stood here with him, marrying him, making the choice to marry him, spoke volumes of her progression.  It spoke volumes of the person she had been, the person she was now, and the person she was becoming.  She was always a work in progress.  

Matthew was there for it all.  There to help her, there to guide her through it.  There to help her achieve her dreams and expose to things she never thought possible.  Lake Louise.  Moraine Lake.  The Bahamas.  Europe.  St. Louis.  Confidence.  Trust.  Love.

“I love you,” he whispered to her when their vows were done, rubbing his thumb over the backs of her hands.

“I love you too,” she whispered back.  Freely.  Meaningfully.  Deeply.

“I now pronounce you husband and wife!” the officiant beamed.

For the first time in her life, Effie was married.

[luimagines]

Coul I request the chain reacting to meeting the reader who is Wild's sibling? (If background is needed shrieks science and them whatever purchase did so the reader is just sorta- 15-28 )

Masterlist

I don't understand the second sentence but I think I can infer what you're trying to say. And even then, I came up with a backstory that more less fixes it regardless so yay!

Wild is everyone's favorite chaotic creative sibling!

And I went for older sibling because reasons and just assume that sibling! Reader is in their early twenties.

Content under the cut!

You woke up one day in Hateno village, quietly aware of the silence that echoed through your house.

You miss your brother.

Not that he was here often with his Goddess given assignment nor did he even know who you were for the first half of it.

What a day that was.

Your little brother back from the dead, scars and all and then some... but he had no idea who you were.

It hurt to say the least. But you were told it would happen once the news reached you. He would wake up one day to finish his duty but he would not remember anything regarding his past life.

Even when he found you again, after he somehow remembered you, you didn’t know where to begin.

You just knew that you were so happy to be together again after so long that you hugged him as tight as you could and told him that your door was always open.

To say you both cried is the understatement of the century. It was wet and ugly and messy and neither of you really talk about it but it felt good that day.

And while you both knew he couldn’t stay for long with his adventure being no where near complete. He did come home for the night after he set that travel medallion of his by the front door.

But that was then- before the Calamity was defeated.

Now that it’s gone- so is your brother. Again.

On a different quest this time, it seems.

You don’t understand why your baby brother of all people has to be the one to do it and you would like nothing more than to wrap him up in a blanket and shield him from anything else that comes to hurt him- but he never let you do that as a child- let alone now.

You begin the day like any other and try to get as many mundane chores done as you can before you finally try and get the stable in the back fixed up.

You noticed Link had an affinity to horses and had checked in with the nearest stable to see that he had some lodged under his name.

There’s a place at the house, darn it. Lodge them here. It just needs to be fixed.

With your goal in mind, you lose yourself to the work and the time passes effortlessly.

It’s around noon by the time you hear it.

The familiar sound of activation that gets your heart pounding in relief and unbridled joy.

You drop your hammer and run to the front of the house with the largest grin on your face. “You’re back, you Rug Rat! Come here!”

You single him out instantly amongst the group and tackle him in a hug.

He’s long stopped trying to fight on you on this and has also returned your crushing hug with one of his own. “I’m back.”

“You brought friends too.” You grin and give the group a two fingered salute. “And here I was afraid that this loner child would end up dead in a ditch somewhere and I would be none the wiser. Thank you for looking after my little brother. I’m aware he’s a handful.”

“Ok thanks.” He says.

“Little brother?” Someone from the group asks. They’re lost amongst the sea of head but you nod regardless.

“Yup. I remember the day he was born like it was yesterday.” You grin and put your hands on your hips, introducing yourself right after. “Any friend of Link’s is a friend of the family. Come in, come in. Make yourselves at home. It’s not much but it’s ours. Been in the family since before the calamity struck. Let me wash up a bit and then we can get some food going, yeah?”

“I’ll start up the stove.” Link says and you’re about to disagree. After all, he just got home and should rest while he can but he ahs the most unburdened smile on his face that you can’t bring yourself to deny him.

 “Alright.” You sigh and head to the back where the shower is. It’s always been small and a bit cramped and the door stopped fitting correctly about ten years ago but now that’s it’s not just you anymore, you can go around into the giving the house the TLC it deserves.

But you’re starting with the stable in the back.

When you’re finished and you’ve dried yourself off, you get into the house to find it in a delightful array of colors and chaos.

Each of the boys seemed to have made themselves completely at home in the time you were gone and you leaned against the door frame, watching them all interreact.

Your brother didn’t waste any time with getting the stove up and running. You can smell the beginning of lunch getting cooked and it appears that Link has wrangled two of the boys to be his helpers. One appears to be the youngest with bright wide eyes and a similar blue tunic to that of Links and the other looks to be  slightly more timid in the process. He’s around the same height as Link but darker hair and a long white cape still clasped around his shoulders. 

You recognize the Master Sword strapped to his back.

Making a note of that you look around the room again. Three of them have made themselves comfortable at the table. One is easily the biggest guy of the group, red and blue tattoos on his face and scar over his eye as he watches the others go about the admittedly small house. The other two look to be the same size and you’re sure you can look them in the eye if you needed to. They’re talking to both each other and the group that’s cooking. One has a wolf pelt on his shoulder with more tattoos on his face and other is a knight if you’ve ever seen one with a bright blue scarf around his neck.

You’re not one to judge your brother’s friends but you make a mental note to watch him in case he tries anything.

Two of the boys- one with pink hair and the other have the most solid brown mane of the whole group have made themselves spares and are talking quietly to each other and not making a fuss.

The final one looks to be the smallest but he’s got an older glint to his eye that recognize well. He’s wearing arguably the most color tunic of the group with those four patches sewn together. He’s tucked himself away into a corner with a book out, not interacting with either of them outright but he has been looking up and adding his two cents to the older’s conversation at the table.

They don’t notice you’re back which is a testament to how tired they all must be.

They’re an interesting bunch.

But Link did always surround himself with interesting people.

So you’re not really surprised.

“Sooo...” Pinky starts off, calling your bother’s attention. “You have an older sibling?”

“Yup!” He answers, not looking up from the pot. “They were waiting for me the whole time, and even manage to keep the house. Up keep still needs to be done but we’ve been working on it together.”

“But they’re older.”

“Yes. We’ve established this.”

You have to hold back your snort.

“You were asleep for one hundred years.” Four Patches speaks up, closing his book silently. ”Shouldn’t they... ummm...”

“Be dead?”

“Or at least really old?” Mr. Brunette hops in, trying to lessen the blow of the sentence.

“You’re like one hundred and seven teen right? Wouldn’t that put them at being one hundred and twenty something?” Wolf boy offers.

“I guess so. Yeah. They were old at some point.” Link stops stirring and you can see him try to run the numbers in his head. “I know that much. The village talks about them being really old sometimes, but I guess that was years ago because it’s only from the older folk that live here.”

“But they lived through those one hundred years, didn’t they?” Blue Baby Face speaks this time.

“That’s what they told me.”

“So....” The knight tilts his head and tries to put his hands out as if that would help answer the question. “They’re like the Old Man then? Old in their head but young on the outside.”

“You can say that, yeah.” You say and take extreme satisfaction at the way most of the jump at your voice. “Unlike Link, I was alive the whole time he was asleep. I’ve got grandkids in Lurelin and they visit from time to time but someone had to at least keep the house up and running, might as well have been me.”

“I...” Link starts as he takes the food off the burner. “I never asked you how you stayed young, did I?”

“Nope.”

“Oh.” He looks away and deflates a little. Link looks a little disappointed with himself and that won’t stand in this house.

“I didn’t realize it was that important. And I’m going to assume you’ve explained most of the situation Rug Rat.” You laugh a little with a raised eyebrow. “You can blame Purah. You know she wanted to find a way to keep the old from aging, right? It’s why she’s in the body of a little kid again. But when she tried the second formula she realized that if she tried it on herself that it might as well but poof her back into a baby and she wanted to contact Robbie but he’s too far and too old to make that trip. I volunteered.”

“Really?”

“It still didn’t really work, I was transformed into a teenager instead of a child- a horrible time to exist really. But I suppose it was a blessing in disguise. By the time this one-” You step into the house fully and ruffle Link’s hair. “-came back, it left us with the same age gap as before. So in the end I can’t complain.”

“Why’d you volunteer?” Cape guy leans on the wall. “There’s only so many times you can test it, right? Who’s to say it wouldn’t have been worse?”

“Yeah, what if it did transform you into a baby again and you forgot everything?” Four Patches stands up and comes to stand by the table, putting his book on top of it. 

“I wanted to take the risk.” you shrug and pull your brother into a hug. “Is it a crime to want to see my baby brother again not matter the cost?”

“Get off.” He whines.

You laugh but do as he asks. “It was never said when he’d be back. Only that he would. I was willing to buy as much time as needed to be there for him.”

“I didn’t remember you...” He mutters to himself.

“You now, don’t you?” You punch him gently. “We’ve talked about this. It’s ok. I knew it was going to happen. It wasn’t going to stop me. Ganon himself couldn’t properly get rid of me. I’m not leaving your side anytime soon.”

He smiles and turns to hug you.

“Now where’s your wolf friend?” You ask. “Are you still traveling together? There’s something I wanted to give him.”

Wolf Pelt shimmies in his seat for a second but you don’t think much of it.

Link shakes his head. “Not right now but he has been coming by every now and then.”

“Well it’s good he’s still around to look after you then in my stead.”

“We have a horse though.” Link tilts his head up to grin at you. “It’s not the same but her name is Epona.”

Familiarity stabs you in the heart and you know it’s something that Link even remember even if he lives another one hundred years.

He was too little when she passed.

“...Like dad’s old horse. Can I see her?” You say with a light constriction in your throat. “How crazy would it be if they looked alike?”

“Dad had a horse?”

“You wouldn’t remember her, you were too little. I barely remember her as it is but yes, he did.” You take a step back and motion back towards the door. “Maybe after lunch you show me. We can bring her to the back and measure up how the stable is. I’ve been fixing it up.”

“Really!?” Link blinks, an excited glint appearing in his eyes.

“Yes. That’s what I was doing when you first came in. But let’s eat first.” You put your hand to the small of his back and push him gently in the direction of the table. “And then you can tell me about your friends and this new adventure of yours.”