#like wow i have ppl who will just. buy me plane tickets and tour tickets and food
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not to sound like a quitter, but.
#wat do u do wen ur in iceland with two of ur best friends#but u cant fucking sleep#and u dont have any of ur creature comforts and by gods are u a creature of comfort#and u have no money#and youve put very little effort towards this trip and even less money lmao#like wow i have ppl who will just. buy me plane tickets and tour tickets and food#which is lovely but ultimately soul crushing#bc im going to spend the next four years repaying that#bc i cant get it the fuck together with my spending habits#like ffs im almost 30 and i keep spending my money like a 10yo who found $5 in the street#and cash doesnt feel like a real option in iceland#and unfortunately i also screwed myself by not getting my new credit card#there is. a lot of negativity in my brain rn.#yeah its bc im tired as shit but with the insomnia#like i would pretend to sleep bc i know its better than doom scrolling but fuck#my brain refuses to be distracted from the self loathing rn#2hrs of lying there and i was like okay ill read fic for a bit so i stop. Thinking.#but then i close my eyes and my brain just fucking flushes itself again#anyway. screaming. hollering. homesick.#i only have unhealthy coping mechanisms at this point and unfortunately my fave one is illegal here sooooo.......#might try buying a pack of smokes tmrw lmao#provided i dont find anything sharp first heyyo
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