#like while roman does have ptsd i think he is lying about not wanting to go to the gala due to ptsd

[disasterbispn]

I have thoughts about a network tv show from 5 years ago (Blindspot s3)! And those thoughts are these: so, Roman is lying to Blake about… um, everything, but she doesn’t know that, so isn’t her response to his PTSD reveal a bit, um… awful?

[delimeful]

(dont) take this the wrong way (5)

warnings: injury, blood mentions, past psychological&emotional&physical abuse, ptsd, sickness

-

Virgil woke up, which was only unsurprising for the few moments it took him to 1. realize that his head was pounding and 2. remember the two very large reasons why.

His eyes flew open, and he found himself half-submerged in a shallow pool of cool water, surrounded by flat ledges of dry rock. The sound of ocean waves lapping against the cliffside echoed around the cavern, which was dimly lit by overhead cracks in the ceiling.

In one of these beams of paltry light, Logan was slumped over on his side, glasses askew. Virgil’s relief at seeing him was instantly overshadowed by terror at what could have happened to the human after Virgil had gone and gotten his skull knocked against rock.

His headache worsened, and he lifted a hand to press against the sore spot, pausing when he found more of those stiff bandage strips wrapped around his head.

The soft sloshing of water seemed to be enough to startle Logan into wakefulness, and the human brightened slightly at the sight of him. “Virgil. It’s good to see you awake. Are you feeling any pain or nausea?”

“What happened?” Virgil replied in lieu of the real answer, which was ‘everything hurts’. “Where are we, I thought we were dead for sure—!”

“Take a few deep breaths,” Logan advised, shuffling closer to the pool and offering a hand. Virgil took it gratefully. “We’re not currently in any danger. I believe we’re at the home of the seal-hybrid mer, if—“

“We’re what?!” Virgil’s voice dropped to a horrified double pitch, his grip on Logan’s hand instantly turning crushing.

“Ow,” Logan said in a pointed monotone. Virgil eased up before his claws could turn the human’s palm into bloody ribbons. “Let me finish, please. I’ve managed to work out a rudimentary method of communication, and as far as I know, we’re not currently at risk.”

“From the giant mer-eating monsters that literally kidnapped us, you mean?”

“Yes, that was the potential risk I was referring to.” Logan pulled Virgil further upright, reaching out with his free hand. “More importantly, you’ve been out for some time. Will you allow me to take a look at your injury?”

Virgil shuffled a little closer, allowing the hand to make contact with him. He had traversed currents of all temperatures, but in chilled still waters like this, Logan’s warmth was more than welcome. “I dunno how that’s more important than our inevitable, rapidly-approaching deaths, but sure, fine. Knock yourself out.”

“I will not? You are already dealing with a likely concussion, I see no reason to double that number.” Logan squinted at him like he was concerned that the head wound had taken a worse toll than he’d thought.

“No, it’s-- it’s just an expression. Don’t actually pass out, or I’ll freak out.”

“Ah,” Logan acknowledged, his hand twitching like he wanted to grab something before returning to carefully peeling the bandages away. “My apologies. Colloquialisms are not my strong suit.”

Virgil blinked back at him, because five syllable words were a little much even when he wasn’t concussed. “No worries?”

Logan continued to gently probe the back of his head. A sharp pang made him jerk away with a muted hiss, his vision blurring with pain as the sharp motion only agitated all his other cuts. He waved off Logan’s apology before it was fully formed. “S’fine. What’s the damage?”

“The bleeding has stopped, which is a good sign. It’s swelled significantly, but the cool water is hopefully helping reduce that as well. The best course of action now is for you to rest and recover in a dark, quiet place, ideally for at least two full days.”

“Yeah, but that’s not happening unless we get away first,” Virgil shot back, irritably twitching his fins down as Logan rewrapped the injury. The human let out a slow breath.

“Virgil. I believe the situation isn’t as dire as you think.” He settled back on his heels, back stiff as he spoke. “Our captors have shown no signs of aggression or hunger, even with the significant bleeding from your head wound. It’s possible--”

“It’s not possible!” Virgil cut him off, scowling fiercely. “That doesn’t mean anything. They’re playing some kind of sick game the way they always do, and if you let them trick you, you’re going to lose!”

Logan looked back at him inquisitively, still not getting it. “What evidence are you basing this off of? I was under the impression that you’ve spent only marginally more time in their company than me. Have they attempted to trick you in the past?”

“Yes, no, I mean--,” Virgil groaned, pulling at his bangs. “They don’t have to say it. That’s just how giants like them operate. We’re smaller, they can do what they want to us, we don’t get a say in it. You escape or you die.”

“Yet, we’ve been in their admittedly less-than-ideal care for over 24 hours, and they haven’t hurt us or made any indications they intend to hurt us.” Logan gestured expansively, his hand a bit wobbly. “That’s a rather long time to pretend, and for what purpose? If it was what they desired, we have been easy targets for a meal from the moment they relocated us.”

A rather long time to pretend. Virgil swallowed down a hysterical laugh, feeling dizzy. If a day of false niceties was all it took to buy his trust, he’d have never gotten away from his first encounter with a giant mer. “You’re— you’re human. You don’t know anything about this.”

Logan frowned. “I may be human, but that does not make me an idiot. Even with a language barrier, body language and expression are invaluable tools for communication, and I’ve been doing very little but observe them while you were unconscious. Virgil, if you just tried talking to them—“

“No!” he snapped, curling in even as his fins flared wide and threatening. He wouldn’t do this again, wouldn’t be subjected to the world’s most torturous game of catch and release, wouldn’t be lured back into too-tight hands by false promises and meaningless apologies. He couldn’t do that again.

Measured, rhythmic tapping on the back of his hand slowly brought him back to the present, cool air and Logan’s steady voice by his side. His throat was closed-up-too-tight, his gills too far out of the water to switch lungs— but the rhythm was counted out over and over, breathe in, hold, and out.

“There you go,” Logan said as Virgil took in another long, shuddering drag of air. “Well done.”

The air smelled like iron. He realized that somewhere in the past few minutes, he’d dug his claws into the soft sides of the human’s hand, drawing blood. He pulled away as though he’d been burned.

Logan didn’t even twitch, still searching his gaze intently. “Are you with me?”

Virgil nodded stiffly. “Yeah, I— fuck, I’m sorry.”

“No, I shouldn’t have pushed you. I didn’t realize— but I should have.” A deep, resolved breath. “It’s okay. I’ll find you a way out that doesn’t involve interacting with them.” Logan’s gaze went distant and hazy with thought, and Virgil hesitantly drew closer, pulling a bandage free to wrap around his bleeding hand.

… He was really warm. Clammy, too, and he’d been sitting in a cold, wet cave for hours, hadn’t he? Had been completely drenched for even longer.

“You’re sick,” Virgil said, and Logan took a moment too long to refocus on him. How had it taken him so long to notice? “That’s why you need me to talk to them. You need to get home.”

“My illness is no more severe than your injuries,” he deflected, adjusting his glasses clumsily. “Right now, the priority is getting you away from triggering circumstances. If my suspicions are correct, I will be fine regardless.”

Right. His suspicions, based on his willingness to trust his own abductors. He’d trusted Virgil, too, back in those tunnels. He’d known that he might be abandoned and he’d freed Virgil anyways, taken his hand anyways. Gotten hurt for his trouble.

He’d get hurt worse if Virgil left him here.

“... Yeah,” Virgil said, tucking the edge of the bandage in carefully. “But you should sleep for now. We both should. You said they haven’t done anything yet, right?”

“Yes, but…,” Logan’s brow was furrowed slightly, as though he knew something was off, but wasn’t quite sure what. “I mean, you do need rest. If… If you’re sure.”

“I am,” Virgil replied, curling against the edge of the pool and pillowing his head on his arms to hide their shaking. “Get some sleep, Specs.”

—

It was early morning when Patton woke to the splash of something small dropping into the water from his air room.

The room wasn’t overly large, being designed only for occasional use when he needed some extra oxygen in his system. It was also quite a few caves up above his sleeping den, but with two delicate little guests staying over, his senses were on high alert. He disentangled from Roman, who had been clinging to him for extra warmth, waking the shark mer in the process.

“Mwha’huh?” he asked groggily, and Patton chuckled at the way one side of his hair had been pressed into a tangled bundle.

“I think they may be awake!” he reported quietly, and Roman perked right up. They had originally hovered in the room over the two of them, only leaving after the human-- busy tending to the tiny mer’s wounds-- had gotten too fed up and used charades to shoo them away, leaving them with nothing to do but sit around and think about how badly they’d messed up. As such, they were both more than eager to start fixing things.

Upon popping up into the air room, however, they found only the human, lying completely still apart from the slow rise and fall of his chest. Deep in sleep, with an empty pool at his side.

Roman and Patton exchanged a panicked look, and ducked back underwater to search through his home and see where, exactly, the injured mer had gone.

It didn’t take long to spot him. The mer had practically every fin and frill puffed out, even the ones that were still injured. The threat display as eye-catching as they got.

He was hovering in the opening of a vent crevice, one that helped circulate seawater through the caves. It was small enough that if he vanished through it, they wouldn’t be able to stop him or see where he was headed. He knew it, too, staring them down with sharp defiance rather than absolute terror.

“Don’t move,” he said, as though they hadn’t both frozen at the sight of him. “I’m going to-- to make a deal with you.”

“A deal?” Roman asked, and received a sharp, wild-eyed glare for his troubles.

“Yeah, a deal. The other one is sick,” a slight jerk of the head toward the air room, “so he won’t last long here. Probably already too far gone to even play a single game.”

Patton was torn between concern (the human was sick?) and confusion. Game?

“But I’m fine. I’ve had much worse than this.” The mer drifted back slightly, closer to the crevice. “If I leave now, you’ll never find me, and then Lo-- the human will die, and you won’t have anything to play with.”

A creeping sense of dread overcame Patton. He still didn’t know what was going on, but it was sounding more and more like something was seriously wrong here.

“So, a deal. You take the human back to where you found him, and I’ll stay-- I’ll stay here,” his voice cracked painfully, but he ignored it, staring at them with a desperate sort of intensity. “With you. I won’t try to get away or anything. I-- I swear.”

“Get away?” Roman asked, his voice going high with the same sort of horror that currently swamping Patton. The mer ducked back at the sound, gaze flitting between them, some of that terror returning.

“I will! I’ll leave, if you-- you can either have one or none, that’s the deal, I’m not kidding. I’m not!” His fins flared wider, blood beginning to leak from some of them. “He’s human anyways, he can barely even swim, you don’t want him--”

“Kiddo,” Patton cut in urgently, raising his hands peacefully and trying not to wince when the mer flinched, “if he’s sick, of course we’ll take him back to where he can get help. No deals necessary, okay?”

The little guy didn’t look reassured at all. “I want to watch. I have to see you put him back, where other humans will find him, or else the deal’s off.”

He didn't believe them. Patton exchanged a helpless look with Roman, who finally nodded.

“Of course,” the shark mer said, “You are more than welcome to accompany us back to the mainland where Patton found him, provided that you’re not exacerbating your injuries.”

The mer hissed at him, a tiny, reedy sound. “And whose fault is that?”

“Irresponsible human fishing vessels?” Roman tried, and then wilted under both Patton and the mer’s looks when the joke fell flat. He cleared his throat. “It is, of course, mine. I wanted to apologize for the way I manhandled you before. Regardless of my intentions, it was unbefitting behavior, and it hurt you. I am truly sorry.”

He bowed with a little flourish, moving slower than normal. The mer stared at his bowed head apprehensively, and then covered the look up with a distrustful scowl.

“If you’re sorry, get Logan out of this place before he gets any worse,” he finally replied, and Patton nodded and went to retrieve the human-- Logan, presumably.

Glancing over his shoulder as he left, he could see the way the tiny mer’s fins had settled just slightly, not quite as frantically overextended as before.

It was a start.

[littleblackqrow]

((I think the most frustrating part of watching people analyze the actions of characters in vol8 is that the biggest complaint is that logic is thrown out the window and I would argue that’s the point. Especially because of the perspective of the show. I really hate to keep picking on Ironwood, Qrow, and RWBY, but those characters are the ones driving the plot, so I guess we gotta.

Lets start with RWBY. They’re kids first off. WBY are all about 19-20 years old and Ruby is 17. Lets start off by saying those are ages not exactly known for smart, long term decision making. Most people that age are trying to figure out what they want to do for the rest of their lives, struggling with college, dates, drinking, sex for the first time. They’re stumbling around in adult bodies while still having more or less the mind of a teenager because society has suddenly stopped treating them like a kid and expects them to be an adult. Except instead of having to struggle with decisions about their near future, RWBY is being asked to save the world. If you think you could handle that pressure well at 17-19, you’re lying. 

Does it make their decisions right though? No. The way they treated Ozpin for hiding the worst of his abuse and the fact that his ex-wife was an insane bitch who is functionally immortal is wrong. But again, I ask you, could you handle having all that dumped into your lap in an already stressful situation? The person who should be (and rightly is) condemned for his reaction is Qrow for throwing a punch. No matter how upset you are no hitting. Once you throw a punch in that situation, you’re the bad guy. And until he makes an effort of an apology he’s the bad guy in that situation. 

The biggest problem that team RWBY has is that all of their terrible decisions throughout the show have either been rewarded, or the got bailed out from having to see the real consequences. 

Ozpin allowed Blake to hide her White Fang past and therefore missed the least subtle component of the Fall of Beacon. Things could have been significantly less bad if he’d known about their involvement and was able to send Qrow in to spy on their operations. Maybe he could have figured out what Roman or Adam was up to, realized they were working for Cinder and by extension Salem.

Ozpin allowed team RWBY to do a mission that was a couple grades too advanced for them because he knew they’d break the rules otherwise. That was a tacit acknowledgement that he thought whatever they were up to was alright, and that they had his blessings on whatever it was that they wanted to do.

The best example of terrible decision after terrible decision that RWBYJNR makes is Argus. They have no idea how they’re getting the Relic to Atlas, and they seem road blocked. Jaune suggests stealing an airship, and Qrow, the adult in the room tells them that this is a bad idea, and if it goes bad it has the potential to screw up their entire life. He’s right. The problem is that he’d run off on his bender, and therefore the kids, and we in the audience, are supposed to see this as an unreasonable suggestion. 

However, it plays out as him being right. The incredibly complicated plan did go wrong. Now, they had no reason to suspect at the time that Adam was stalking Blake at the time (and I could go into why thats perfectly ic for him at another date), but there were a lot of moving parts in this plan and literally any of them could have broken. Everything that happened after they put this plan into motion was reactionary. Cordovan, obsessed with showing the Might of Atlas (TM), jumped into the mech suit. At that point, Ruby didnt really have a choice of not breaking it. But the ensuing fight created enough general unease that it summoned a Grimm hoard.

By rights, Argus should have fallen because of their bad decisions and in spire of their best efforts. Instead, Cordovan had a change of heart at the last moment and bailed them out.

This just reinforced the flawed idea that RWBY is always in the right and directly lead to s7′s climax. They are the unstoppable force.

Now you have Ironwood, quite literally the unmovable object, which I now realize is sort of his name. Ha.

Ironwood’s behavior does not come out of nowhere. Since his appearance, he’s had problem stamped all over him. He showed up with an entire goddamn army to a supposedly peaceful event that is to promote unity and the excellence of each kingdom. His rationale is that the people are going to be impressed with his big guns and feel safe. Ozpin gently points out that those big guns also signal to people that there is something out there that those big guns are designed to shoot. 

If its not a Grimm, could it mean that Atlas intends to shoot people?

Remember we’re not even 100 years out from the last World War, one that was basically started by Atlas. People are nervous. There are still grandparents and great grandparents alive today that were kids when the Great War was happening. Not only that but we’re also made aware that Atlas has rolled in the apolitical protectors of the people, the Huntsmen, into its military. This elite fighting force that is basically above the law and can go to any country in the world whenever they want, is now part of the military. The ONLY standing military that Remnant seems to have.

All of this has obviously caused friction in the Inner Circle. Qrow is not quite and never has been quiet about his disdain for James’ heavy handed techniques. Glynda calls James’ actions a dick measuring competition, and Ozpin was trying to be gentle about it, but he was clearly telling Ironwood to get his army off his fucking front lawn. And what did Ironwood do? He’d gone around Ozpin and talked to the Vale council.  They were threatening to remove Oz fro his position because they agreed with Ironwood: he was being too passive. Ironwood even tells Glynda that he cant believe that a man he trusted for so long would just sit by and stand to the side instead of meeting the problem head on. He didnt seem to understand why Qrow would want to go gather intelligence on an operation before sending in the big guns. 

Ironwood has never been a man to put a well thought out plan with all his ducks in a row into motion. This is a man who plows through opposition at every opportunity.

And when we see him again, we can see him steamrolling through opposition again. Somehow he got himself two seats on the council. That gives him an enormous amount of power. And his position as general means that at any point he can declare an emergency and become the de facto dictator of Atlas if he deems it fit. The problem is that he’s having these arguments against Jacques Schnee a man that the audience rightly hates, so he seems reasonable. Who gives a fuck about Jacques loosing business, he’s a dickhead. We’re not noticing the fact that James is consolidating power, or that he’s using that power to make unilateral decisions with no one telling him no.

There’s no one left in the room who is able or willing to tell him that these are bad ideas, that there will be consequences that he cant foresee. His  bullish behavior lead to both Robyn Hill and Jacques Schnee running for an empty council seat, and that created the environment that we walked into in s7.

Now, not all James’ ideas are bad. The Amity Project is actually a really good one, and James is right in wanting to keep it from the general public until its near completion. But you know who should have known? The other fucking council members. Probably the candidates. Playing your cards too close to the chest when you clearly need help and allies is a bad thing. But again, James didnt even trust Ozpin to be able to run his own kingdom, so durr hurr of course he’s the only one who can take care of Amity. And run a kingdom. And run an academy. And protect an ageing, ailing Maiden. And of course he doesnt have time to treat his horrific PTSD from the Fall of Beacon.

So when things go tits up because again, of course they will with a plan that complex James Ironwood doubles the fuck down on his terrible solo decision making. Clearly, non of this is his fault. No one is listening to him. He cannot trust others to make decisions so he’s going to make all of them. There’s no one around him to tell him no, especially because the first person that tried was publicly executed. 

James is scared. He’s had a mental break because of that fear. His paranoia, his PTSD, and the fact that there’s nothing there to help him back to stability means that he’s just going to be bouncing from one terrible choice to the next. He’s Hamlet in the throes of paranoia, heading down a road that is going to get everyone, including himself killed. He is King Lear as the world crumbles around him, acting cruel and making unreasonable, horrible demands of those around him. 

Working with Watts seems like an absolutely terrible idea, but to someone who thinks that he is in control of the situation because he has to be in order to keep functioning, there’s no way that this can bite him in the ass. For James, if no one is willing to follow his orders, he’s going to make them. This attitude is probably exactly why Watts did what he did and joined Salem in the first place. 

So when you combine the unstoppable force of Team RWBY, who’s been told they’re the child saviors of the world, and who’ve been either rewarded or bailed out of their bad decisions against the immovable object of Ironwood and his absolute conviction in himself, you have the mess Atlas is in now.

Honestly I find it kind of brilliant. 

[thechildoflightning]

JKSF Jobs

I got asked awhile ago by the lovely @mewithanie if I could write about everyone’s jobs in jksf if it sparked my interest. It did spark my interest, but I couldn’t figure out how to make it into a one-shot or story, so take a tumblr post bullet-style explanation instead!

Read on to find out all about the jobs Patton, Roman, Logan, and Virgil hold in just keep stumbling forward (baby im waiting for you)

tw: suicide (oc), PTSD and trauma (mentioned only), mentions of drugs, alcohol, and school shootings.

Patton

Runs a non-profit

Non-Profit pairs up with schools

Non-Profit is an art therapy center focused on increasing connection within teenagers and allowing them an appropriate outlet for emotional turmoil

Patton’s group generally gets placed on ‘high-risk’ campuses or campuses that have incidents happen at them

‘High-risk’ in this case is defined by higher than normal suicide rates, low attendance rates, high-levels of illegal activity (generally drug and alcohol use), high rate of poor mental health, more than average amounts of cheating, etc

Instances involve things like excessive inappropriate school-wide behavior (ie. all the kids getting drunk and disorderly at a school event) as well as shocking incidents (student death from suicide, overdose, drunk driving, or things such as school shootings)

Some kids come by choice, others are referred through a suspension exchange program

Pretty much, a kid gets suspended but can choose to go to the group’s meetings instead of facing suspension

Kids get referred for suspensions that deal with violence, drug use, alcohol use, excessive absences, and so forth

The idea behind it is that suspended the kid will only negatively impact the kids record and give no reason to change behavior, while the group can help get to the root of the issue and work towards solving/improving that instead

Other kids go by choice bc they’re looking for extra support, a healthy outlet, advice, etc

They have weekly after school meetings (per each district, with one focal school in each one. The program is currently seven districts wide)

They also have lunch drop-ins were you can come make art, chill, get a snack, pet a therapy dog, and other stuff

One of Patton’s first schools was the same school Virgil works at

Patton generally leads the entire non-profit and has delegates to deal with the different districts

He handles the school/district that Virgil is at, though he attempts to go to as many things at the other districts as he can

Does a lot of outside work promoting the program to school and school boards, but is starting to delegate a lot of that work to others so he can focus on the kids instead of the bureaucratic shit

Has had to cut back on individual involvement and delegate more as the work and stress from running an entire non-profit has taken a large toll on his health related to chronic illness

He is Not Happy about this fact, but it’s for his health and he needs it. His spouses help support in any ways that they can.

Roman

Theater Boi

He is a director for a local theater company that is actually not half-bad

Enjoys the heck out of it

Went into college planning to become an actor

And boy does he love acting and the truth is? He was good enough. He could have become an actor. 

But somehow he finds it even more magical running everything behind the acting (and so so much more work, god he never realized how much Work This Was)

So he joins a theater company and he slowly works his way up

At first he comes in as assistant choreographer 

He’s young and they don’t think much of it, but the show genuinely improves by his individual suggestions and work and wait, who the fuck is this kid and how do we hang onto him?

He makes his way up quite quickly, sliding his way into assistant directly and then co-director and then suddenly the director’s leaving and now he’s the director

It happens fast and it’s very very exciting but he’s also honestly a little overwhelming and he’s never been good at managing large tasks without procrastinating bc executive dysfunction (see this post and this one about Roman and ADHD)

And now he is The Director and an entire production is depending on him. Everything. All of it. And it was what he was looking for but it’s a lot.

The first time he’s on his own, it goes okay

It’s by far not the best the company has done, but it’s also not the worst and the company is pretty supportive of his jump to director and the people who have been there longer help him learn to delegate tasks

And so he tries again, and he does better, and he just continues to get better from there

There’s just one hiccup: the scenographer

Basically the scenographer Does Not Like Roman and it creates Conflict

(In my head I sorta imagine the boss character Joan played when they were playing Thomas as Roman as Joan as the boss character in that one part of “Can LYING Be Good?”)

Luckily, Deceit later takes that position, and him and Roman work way better together and pull off some pretty bomb ass productions

Roman has been asked to join other companies before- specifically travelling companies and work on Specific Productions- which is very cool and very exciting but he decides he’d rather do what he’s doing now bc 

a) he enjoys the rhythm of his work. b) larger productions are more stress. c) he doesn’t want to be gone from his spouses. And d) he gets a lot of positivity and meaning out of what he does now and doesn’t see a reason to change that

Every summer he also runs the local chapter of Shakespeare in the park. 

He does act in these as well bc it’s completely volunteer based. Deceit also acts in these with him and these two theater dorks have way to much fun together

They may or may not of kidnapped Trixie for one of the productions (with Virgil’s consent of course)

Logan

Logan works for a company that considers themselves as a “research and problem-solving team for the improvement of marine environments”

Basically, Logan researches issues that negatively impact marine life and helps come up solutions to improve or solve these issues

Most of what he does is cycle through data that other researchers collect and figure out what that data means and how it connects

He looks at a lot of abstract numbers and pulls them together to state exactly what the numbers are reporting 

From there he brings that research to a board that forms a hypothesis and then comes up with potential solutions

These solutions are often considered very progressive and liberal and as such cause a lot of debate

Solutions range from legal changes (laws reducing companies waste, laws to prevent oil spills, protection laws around certain species/habitats, etc) to inventions (boats that clean the ocean, replication of habits to help support species that can’t live outside of a certain ecosystem, etc)

The company Logan works for has had numerous very successful projects and many of these projects were successful bc of Logan’s involvement

Logan’s spouses are very very proud of this fact

Logan is modest af and brushed it off

Logan’s had quite a few articles published in scientific journals and his findings/theories/work have also made it to national news in the past

Logan himself has actually been asked to present some of his stuff on the news multiple times. He refuses each time and someone else goes in his place.

Does this mean that person gets a lot of credit that should be assigned to Logan? Yes. Does that person feel bad? They do and try to give credit to Logan. Does Logan care? No, no he does not. 

Logan could care less about credit, he just cares about marine ecosystems and That’s Literally It

Seriously, people ask him things like “does he understand the ‘political implications’ of his job” or “Are you okay with your team constantly stealing your work” and he’s just like “Fish are cool. Leave me the fuck alone.”

Logan has also done more hands-on experience which has included cool adventures that included scuba diving trips to study coral reef damage, spending days in heavy wetlands, and swimming with sharks

His spouses think that this is the coolest thing and Logan agrees a 1000%

He usually works on research because that’s Where He’s Comfortable, but the occasional planned (it has to be planned) research trip is always exciting

Logan also has so much passion for his job. So much passion. It’s sort of an agreed upon deal in the house that when Logan comes home he will generally Need To Infodump because his job is The Coolest

Because of this, a time period between him getting off work and them eating dinner is designated Logan Infodumping Time

Generally this happens while they cook (because as mentioned a few times, Logan is the best cook)

Even if his spouse aren’t helping w/ dinner, they usually try to stick around and listen because a) Logan is Cute when talking about things he enjoys. b) he talks about interesting stuff. c) even if they don’t find it interesting, Logan’s enthusiasm is infectious and they just Have To Listen

Virgil

Virgil is a high school English teacher

He generally teaches sophomore regular English and junior AP English

Classes can shift slightly depending on the year

Virgil was at first a very distant teacher and didn’t connect with his students

Like his students thought he was a fine teacher bc he wasn’t too strict and didn’t assign a bunch of hw, but no one really liked him either

About his fourth year teaching, a kid at Virgil’s school got suicide baited and ended up taking their own life

It was a Big Deal (and is also how Patton found his way to Virgil’s campus)

After the event, there were lots of discussions and groups at the school, and each teacher talked to their classes

Virgil’s discussion was,, impactful to say the least

He talked to the students frankly about the issue and opened discussion to the topic while making sure to keep it respectful and calling students out on shit while at the same time helping support everyone who was struggling

He ended it with a small speech about self-worth, what it meant, and the struggle to achieve it, especially when everyone around you is pulling you down

It spreads like wildfire throughout the school and suddenly Virgil is a very well-liked teacher because He Gets It, y’know

(to clarify- his student’s do not know about his suicide attempts or personally history regarding his PTSD and experiences, that said, they all know there’s something different about this teacher. Something that makes him understand in a way others don’t)

He also has just this snark that students fall in love with

(One of his class’ learning targets for an entire week was just “We’re going to stick it to The Man. How you ask? Well we’ll find out!”

There was also a situation one year when one of Logan’s articles turned up in a multiple choice quiz and No One, including Virgil knew the answers (Virgil did have the answer key but it Did Not Make Sense)

He had to actually call Logan to figure it out

Turns out, most of them was the quiz maker’s mistake because he was asking questions about “author’s tone” and “author’s purpose” and Logan’s just like,, I didn’t meant to have any tone? I don’t understand tone? My purpose was I like fish? Why are they saying it’s to educate the average person??

(pretty much they analyze Logan’s article from a neurotypical standpoint, which Logan Is Not, so it doesn’t work. Virgil scraps the quiz.)

[shxtxpp]

Patton Giving Love

This was talked about in discord by @crystals-and-cream , and I really wanted to write this idea

Warnings: Child Abuse, Mention of Abusive Relationship, Mention of Family Death, Child Abandonment, Abandonment Issues, Trust Issues, Some Caps, Nightmare mention, Lying, Deceit (but Sympathetic), Mention of PTSD, Mention of Depression, Mention of Bipolar, let me know if I missed any

This is a summary so far, I might write this out

Summary:

Patton was abused as a child by his father

Emotionally, verbally and physically

Ran away at the age of 16, not being able to handle it anymore

He lived out of his car all through high school, glad his father didn’t look for him

Patton made sure to work hard for his grades, getting a full ride to college

Graduated at the top of his class

Went to college with a full ride, majoring in Criminal Justice Juvenile and having a minor in psychology

Graduated again top of his class

Throughout college, he was in an abusive relationship and found it hard to escape but was able to thanks to his friend Emile

Once he graduated, he found an apartment that was in his price zone (how? idk) and went job hunting to find a job, and was able to work with at-risk youths in the local juvie and used his psychology minor for good

Years later, he had four adopted son

His past catches up with him when his father comes for a visit one day

He keeps him away from the kids, and I’ll explain more later

Recovery is hard, but he fights to at least try to get better in a way (PTSD, Depression, Bipolar Disorder)

At the end of the day, Patton and his sons are in a happy home, and he gives them all the love they deserve and more than that. No matter what, he will protect and love these boys

The boys love him as well, and they make sure to tell him everyday. Sure they misbehave, and Patton’s outbursts are unexpected, but they always help him through it (but Patton feels guilty and doesn’t want it to bother them), and no matter what, will defend him

Sure they’re all broken in a way, but they help each other out in a way that many don’t understand

Patton getting Logan

Adopted him first when he was age 9

Had decided to start a family after he settled down (3 years later)

Saw how reclusive and independent Logan was

Wanted to show him that it’s okay to have fun

Logan was hesitant at first, mostly because he was scared to be abandoned

Was put in the system after his parents died in a car crash

That’s when he became reclusive

Took months (the process) and more months for Logan to bond with Patton

When they went home, Patton decided to bake cookies for him (sugar cookies)

Had asked Logan how he wanted it to be decorated

Logan wanted stars and started to ramble about stars and how they looked

Patton listened the whole time while decorating

Once nighttime came, Patton decided to order a telescope for Logan

When it came (2 day shipping dudes) Logan was ecstatic and pretty much bouncing around and waiting for nighttime to come

That’s when Logan knew that Patton would love him

Patton getting Roman

Roman is the second to come to the family

How he was adopted was different than Logan

He was age eleven when Patton found him in the streets

Roman was about to pickpocket him when Logan (now 12) saw him and yelled at him

Patton turned around and saw a frozen child, his hand near his pocket

Patton took pity on him and asked where his parents were, shocked when Roman said his parents abandoned him

He didn’t know what to do, and he didn’t want to turn him into the police so he said to come home with, showing him his badge (as he worked for the police [idk how it works hang on with me please])

Roman followed, not wanting to go to jail, and was ready to run if this guy was false

They arrived home and Patton had him sit down while he had Logan go to his room and wait

They talked and Patton felt his heartbreak as he heard why he was abandoned (will tell later on)

Patton decides to take him in there and starts the process (also to have his parents arrested) and about a certain amount of time later, Roman is legally his

Roman takes his time to feel at home, scared to be abandoned again (has abandonment issues) but slowly feels at home

Takes time to get used to Logan, but they soon share a passion of poems and stars (which is what wins Logan over)

Roman gets too rambunctious and Logan is there to give him some logic and help balance out his creativity

Roman vows to protect them no matter what

Patton is happy his home is growing and that his boys get along

Patton getting Deceit (Name?)

Deceit is a trip

Patton gets assigned to a case, this is a difficult child

He is homeless, and has a pretty extensive record already

“HE IS ONLY 14?!” “Yeah, but they start off early” (Logan is 14, Roman is 13)

Patton discovers he only talks by lies after a few sessions, and soon starts understanding him

Deceit is shocked when someone finally understands his words, and he doesn’t know what to do with that information

After a few months, he slowly opens up to Patton and Patton is excited at the progress but makes sure not to startle Deceit

Deceit gets scared at the warm feeling he feels when Patton comes to his cell everyday for their daily talk, and cries when Patton doesn’t for one day (Due to being at Roman’s school for show and tell) (He forgot to tell Deceit) (When he comes back, Deceit is yelling at him and crying at the same time for leaving him alone)

Deceit ran away from his home as he was being abused (verbally/emotionally) and only used as a donor baby for his older brother and has lived on the streets or with other people for a year

Patton knows that Deceit has to serve a year in juvie, and he makes sure that Deceit is getting his education

He decides to become a foster parent for him once he gets out, knowing by now he needs a bigger place

“Patton! You can’t adopt every child you see!” “But he needs a family” “Yeah, but you’re going to end up adopting the whole place!” “Then so be it!”

He was able to become a foster parent for Deceit, and would wait to adopt him in case Deceit didn’t want him to be his father

Deceit was not happy to finally be out (again, he talks by lies) and was not excited to meet what would be his ‘brothers’

Patton smiles and had explained to the boys how Deceit talks and to make him feel at home

Once home, Roman bombards him with questions about Disney and what he likes while Logan takes it slow

He is not startled and does not cling onto Patton at Roman

Patton chuckles and tells the Roman to take it slow

Once Deceit is settled, it is revealed he hates Disney, in specific the villains

Roman is happy to finally have someone to sing along with him

Patton smiles and loves his growing family

Deceit and Roman get along the most, as they had similar pasts

(Deceit is adopted 5 months later as he never wants to leave this family [the first time he says the truth])

Patton getting Virgil

Virgil is the last and the youngest to come into the home (which by now Patton has gotten a big home)

He is 13 (Logan and Deceit are 16, Roman is 15)

He is been through too much that is a miracle he is alive

His parents died when he was 1, his uncle took him in and then died when Virgil was 3, and his aunt took him in then dropped him off at the orphanage when he was only 5

He has huge trust issues

He jumps through foster homes, and since the orphanage know Patton, they ask him if he wants to foster Virgil

He accepts and goes through his file and cries at what this poor boy has gone through

When Virgil arrives, he makes the boys are quiet and don’t startle him at all as he’ll be spooked

Virgil glares at Patton when he tries to take his bag to help him in, thinking Patton is like his other foster parents

He is shocked though when Patton tells him his room is upstairs instead of saying it’s the couch or in the basement

He ignores the boys and follows Patton to his room, not getting comfortable at first

He locks himself in once Patton leaves

Patton knows it’ll take time, but he goes to bake him some welcome treats and make a welcome dinner

Virgil doesn’t like how happy everyone is, thinking it is all false and soon they would turn on him

He just sleeps in the whole day

Wakes up in the middle of the night from a nightmare and opens the door, finding a plate of dinner on the floor with a bottle water and a plate of cookies

He takes it in quickly and eats it slowly, savoring it

Maybe this family isn’t bad

Months passed and he has yet to open up, doing his routine of going to school, coming home, locking himself in, eating during dinner time, then locks himself

However, after one particular nightmare, he wakes up screaming and crying

Everything feels off and he feels suffocated, throwing off his blankets and taking off his shirt

Patton runs in at the sudden scream (light sleeper) and careful with Virgil, he kneels next to his bed and doesn’t touch him and talks to him slowly

Virgil looks at him and follows whatever technique he is doing with his hands and after a while, he is able to breathe and slow his heartbeat

He hugs Patton immediately, and Patton stays still, asking for permission to touch him and when Virgil says yes, he hugs him gently

This is when Virgil feels that he could trust him

Everything goes by slow, and after a year of fostering him, Virgil exclusively asks Patton to adopt him

(During that time, he slightly gets along with Deceit, appreciates how Logan is grounded to earth and that relaxes him, scared by how eccentric Roman is but they both have an appreciation for Disney and Musicals)

-

Patton loves his sons, and gives them all the best love he can

The boys love Patton, and they remind him everyday in their own way

Father’s Day is an emotional day for Patton, as the boys get him separate gifts

Virgil makes him a card he made, along with a drawing of all of them

Deceit gives him a charm bracelet that has dogs, snakes and hearts

Roman makes him a mug saying “An Amazing King and Father”

Logan gives a necklace that has a crescent moon and starts

Patton cries and he hugs them all (somehow)

The boys smile and just hug him back

tag: @pattonly-gay

[magicresteda]

so found this gem tonight. and the whole ‘i was the only one who was loyal and they abandoned me anyway’ fucking hits so damn hard for evil wyatt. I still havent even wrote it up yet. But it also hits so perfectly hard for the verse where he has his memory taken from him, his powers, by mel bc she wants him to have a fresh start - she thinks its the only way to save him. And it does, for a short while. 

But eventually he remembers everything, only he’s stuck without his powers and is pretending to be someone he’s not (so look. basically roman. but only he’s not roman it’s wyatt and his goal for working with crawford is different). 

But the whole? loyalty? and being abandoned by his family anyway. You know he feels that massively in the UF and especially when it comes to Chris who was the only one by his side, left. In Wy’s mind he was doing everything to keep them happy and safe. He was taking control for them and they just abandon him. Its no wonder why he’s so angry when Chris comes back because he’s so desperate to have his brother back. But he’s finally forced to realise that Chris wont ever stop fighting him. And it KILLS him. 

So in the verse where his memories are wiped? despite being powerless. he finally has no weaknesses ya know? he’s willing to kill his family, chris, mel everyone because ‘they don’t care about him’. He’s done with them, he’s done defending them. He’s pissed, enraged and they took everything from him. There are no second chances.

But also, too, him talking about his ‘ptsd’ and lying about it being from some sort of war. omfg. look. evil wyatt recognising his issues and talking about them (even if its to manipulate) is now my new obsession. But him also having that person who actually treats him like a person? that is able to lowkey break through omfg. 

[soy-em]

New Fic: Stone number one

Title: Stonen umber one

Pairing: Gen but also platonic Sam Winchester/Dean Winchester

Rating: G

Warnings: PTSD

Summary: Pressing on his scar helps Sam to cope with Lucifer's presence, but not nearly as much as being near Dean helps.

For @nisaki-chan as part of my 200 follower celebration.

Prompt:   Wincest, hallucinating Sam + hand holding and/or bed sharing. I just want Dean taking care of broken wall! Sam <3

Hope you like it!!

On A03

It’s been a month and a half since Sam first saw Lucifer, and it’s almost old news by now. Almost.

He’s found his ways of coping. The scar on his hand, Dean’s stone number one. A hefty re-investment in the maelstrom of feelings he’d felt during his teenage years, when he’d been able to steadily ignore unpleasant people at will (sulking, Dean had called it).  A healthy dose of Winchester stubbornness, and the inherited ability to drown himself in work.

But above all else, Dean.

Dean might think that the scar is most important, but really it’s the memory of Dean pressing on the scar that makes it work. Better than that is Dean within his sightline, and even more helpful is Dean touching him; a friendly hand on his shoulder or their arms brushing together as they walk doing more to dispel Lucifer than a million busy days.

Best of all would be Dean holding onto the scar again, or just holding on to Sam, really; but Sam hasn’t quite worked up the nerve to ask for that yet.

***

He suffers through another two weeks. It’s getting harder to sleep; nightmares come so frequently and he’s always so, so cold. Dean wakes up, sometimes, when the nightmares are happening; if he does, he wakes Sammy, waits until he’s calmed down and sometimes even strokes Sam’s hair until he falls asleep again. Its wonderful, and it’s not what Sam needs.

***

Sam’s sitting in their motel room. Or at least he thinks he is; he doesn’t remember motel rooms being this cold in the middle of summer, and Lucifer is grinning at him from across the room. He’s doing handstands and cartwheels, and bouncing across the beds in a desperate attempt to get Sam’s attention back on him.

Sam is focused on his research into Dick Roman. They seem to have hit a brick wall in terms of publically available information; he’s brushing up on his hacking skills to see if he can break into Richard Roman Ent. systems. It seems like their only hope of a breakthrough at the moment.

Over the past few weeks, the level of concentration required to delve into the latest hacking techniques and learn the latest code would have been more than enough to let him keep Lucifer at bay. But Sam can almost feel his resolve weakening day by day, and Dean’s been out for hours. The noise Lucifer is making is starting to trickle into his brain, tickling at his concentration, and setting Sam’s teeth on edge.

Sam is close to breaking and phoning Dean when he brother breezes into the room, bringing fresh air and the faint smell of barbeque with him. Dean dumps two paper bags on the table, both almost see-through with grease, and hands Sam a small ice-cream tub.

“Treat time Sammy!” he says cheerfully. “Since you’ve been such a good boy, I’ll let you have dessert before dinner.”

Sam scowls at him on principle, but warmth unfurls in his chest at the reminder of Dean’s go-to reward from their childhood. He starts to spoon the ice-cream into his mouth (pistachio, his favourite), but it’s cold. So cold. Out of the corner of his eye he can see Lucifer wink at him.

Remind you of something, Sammy?

Only Dean can call me that, Sam thinks fiercely; but he can’t bring himself to pick the ice-cream back up. Instead, he snatches at one of the bags, finding a big greasy cheeseburger inside.

“Double blue cheese on steak. Only the best for my little brother,” Dean says proudly.

Sam looks at the burger with distaste. He can almost see the grease dripping from it.

“Eat up,” Dean says more softly. “Gotta get some flesh on those bones.”

Sam’s vaguely aware that he’s losing weight, and this isn’t the first time that Dean’s referred to it. He knows this is Dean’s way of trying to look after him, so he takes a big bite, juice running into his mouth and cheese smearing across his lips.

“Good boy,” Dean says, deliberately patronising, and Sam throws the ice-cream at him.

***

The warmth from the burger, and Dean’s concern, can only last so long though. Sam wakes that night with a scream, the raw feeling in his throat suggesting it might not be the first.

He quickly realises that Dean’s not in his bed; nor is he in the bathroom. It’s late, very late, and Dean’s absence, on top of the lingering fear from the dream, makes Sam panic.

By the time Dean comes back into the room, ice bucket full, Sam’s breath is whistling in his chest.

“Sammy!” The bucket clangs as it hits the floor, Dean speeding across the room to Sam’s side.

The second Dean’s hands cup his face, Sam’s breath eases. He struggles for a moment to coordinate his movements, feeling like all the synapses in his brain are shooting in different directions, but finally he manages to get his left hand on Dean’s right. He pulls Dean’s hand away from his face and pushes Dean’s thumb into the scar. It’s still new enough that it sends a dull pain aching through his hand, and Sam focuses on that pain until his breathing evens out some more.

When he comes back to himself, Dean has settled himself on the bed and is still cupping Sam’s face with his other hand. It feels so, so warm and incredibly good; and because all Sam’s defences are down, he nuzzles into Dean’s hand before he can think better of it. The loud, sarcastic Awwwww from across the room is thankfully drowned out by Dean’s soft chuckle.

“Used to love me doing this when you were little,” Dean says, confidingly. His soothing tone seeps through Sam, and he tilts his head for more. “Used to sit with you for hours, especially when you were sick. You got an ear infection one time, that’s how it started. Do you remember?”

Sam shakes his head minutely.

“I guess not. You were really, really small. You grew out of it by the time you were 7 or so.”

Sam can’t imagine why he would ever have wanted Dean to stop doing something that felt so nice.

“Feeling better now?” Dean asks.

Sam nods, manages a small smile. Words are still a while away.

“Okay.” Dean presses his thumb against the scar. “Want anything? Water? Soda? Whiskey?” The last is said with a ridiculous little wink, and Sam snorts, then shakes his head. “Ok, Sammy.”

Dean sits next to him until Sam’s breathing is completely evened out. The problem is that once he can hear beyond his own breathing, he can once again hear Lucifer on the other side of the room.

Aww, Sammy, look at you sitting with big brother. Feel all better now, don’t you? Lucifer is cooing, making ridiculous faux-sympathetic faces. You think big brother loves you, don’t you? He wouldn’t love you if he knew about Hell.

Sam turns his face away at that, even though it means losing contact with Dean’s hand. Dean must take that as proof that Sam is feeling better, because he moves to stand up. But all Sam’s barriers are down tonight and it gives him the impetus to ask for what he’s been wanting for ages.

As Dean tries to pull his hand out of Sam’s hold, Sam tightens his grip, and pulls Dean back down towards him.

“No, Sammy? Still want me to stay?”

Sam pulls harder. He still can’t quite get words to travel between his brain and his mouth; everything feels out of sync and out of his control. But he knows what he wants.

He pulls again, harder this time, and Dean jerks forwards. Sam uses his other hand to direct Dean down beside him, and settles back against his pillow.

Dean snickers, nervous. “Too big for this now, Sam. Come on, I bet you’ll fall right back asleep if you let me go back to my own bed.”

Sam doesn’t let go. Dean is tense against his side for a while, and Sam can almost hear his thoughts churning. But eventually, Dean relaxes. Pleased, Sam lets his eyes slip closed.

They shoot back open again when Dean pulls away, and Sam makes grabby hands at his brother. It takes a moment, but Dean gets hold of his wrists and pushes them carefully against his chest.

“Just going to take my jacket off and hit the head. I’ll come right back here, I promise. But if you don’t let me go, we’re going to have a situation on our hands.”

Sure enough, Dean shrugs out of his jacket and heads to the bathroom, and within minutes he’s back at Sam’s side. Sam latches on to his hand immediately, pressing Dean’s thumb into his scar; and then before Dean’s brain has time to remember all the reasons why this might be a bad idea, he pulls Dean down against his side.

It takes them both a minute to get themselves sorted out. Dean struggles to get underneath the blankets, and Sam has to find a way to tuck his big frame into Dean’s chest without kneeing his brother in the balls. But they manage, and soon Dean is lying comfortably on his back, Sam’s head pillowed almost against his underarm and both Sam’s legs wrapped around him.

“You always were a fucking octopus,” Dean says, laugh rumbling in his chest. He picks up Sam’s left hand and presses his thumb again. “You gonna be able to sleep now?”

Sam nods. Blessed heat is spreading through him and it’s the warmest he’s felt in months (years, decades, who knows?).

Such a burden for big brother, Sam hears from across the room, but he can’t bring himself to care. Dean is here with him, holding him close, and Sam wants nothing more from his life right now.

“Night night, Sammy,” Dean murmurs, hand soft in Sam’s hair. Sam’s eyelids droop, and he slips into sleep.