#like when i interviewed at m&s it was in stages and there were always extra people. i think i was interviewed by 5 people in total

[fingertipsmp3]

Job interview today 😵‍💫

[mattymattymerduck]

Fluff Alphabet with Matt Murdock 🥺 Pls

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Free time’s probably pretty lowkey with Matt, cuddling on the couch sipping coffee in the morning and playing little games like two truths and a lie. Which is pretty unfair because Matt can tell when you’re lying, but you always take the challenge to pull one on him. He also probably has a decent amount of board games (I know braille monopoly exists, you probably got it as a housewarming gift and spent the first night in his apartment trying to team up with Foggy to beat him, but at the last minute Foggy bankrupt both of you) and laugh at all your failed attempts to cheat. 

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

Matt’s in love with your voice, but maybe more in love with the way you phrase things. He’ll be listening to you recount the plot of one of the shows you’ve been watching recently and smile hard just because the way you emphasis little parts and where you stop to breathe and the places were you slur the words together in a rush to get them out are adorable. He could listen to you talk all day.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

I think Matt would have a hard time knowing what to do, but he trusts that you know what you need in those situations. He’ll be there waiting for any request from you, whether you need a drink or a distraction, anything. He’d draw a bath for you or whip out a book and start reading to you, or he’d just sit there beside you until you put your head on his lap and he’d run his fingers through your hair and talk you through it. 

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

Matt doesn’t like to think about the future much. He doesn’t want to let himself hope for too much and get disappointed if it doesn’t work out. But despite telling himself this there’s a little piece of him that really longs to get married and maybe put Daredevil away to live out a proper life with you. Maybe you guys would have a kid or two, but as long as he was making you happy it didn’t matter too much to him. I think he’d be a pretty big family man if he weren’t dedicated to vigilante-ism.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

He’s passive. He has his moments of assertiveness, usually regarding the Daredevil and keeping you safe, but for the most part he’s happy just following your lead. 

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

You have a lot of different ways you fight, Matt’s more assertive than passive aggressive, but he’s also pretty cool-headed so I think when you argue it’s a lot of him being clearly tired of the topic and disappointed at what’s happening and that makes you even more angry and upset. Usually it takes a few hours of cooling off separately before one of you calls the other and you make up again. 

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

It depends on the day. Even though Matt’s super selfless he manages to let that image consume him and gets pretty self-involved over his work. So when he’s preoccupied with a case he doesn’t necessarily notice the coffee you leave on his desk for him, and when you’re out fighting crime he doesn’t think about you stocking up your first aid supplies or fixing up a meal for him in case he’s hungry when he gets back. But when he has a spare minute, cuddling you on a late morning or taking a bath with you at 4 am when he gets home all aching and bruised, he really appreciates you. 

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

He has a habit of keeping things to himself because he feels like compartmentalizing his problems is easier for both of you, but he’s spent most of your relationship realizing that’s not sustainable. He’s not great at sharing, but he’s actively trying to be better at it.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Yes to both! Your relationship takes a lot of work from both of you because Matt’s so used to doing things on him own and you’re so hungry to help but it never feels like you can help enough. You’re both constantly learning how to make up for those shortcomings and being better at working together. 

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

I don’t see Matt as a terribly jealous person. I think he puts a lot of trust in his s/o, and he has too much respect for them to get too touchy or possessive around others. I do think it’s possible his s/o tries to tease it out of him sometimes, in which case he’ll be pretty subtle but firm in showing who you’re with. (i.e. you’re at a party between a few law firms and he hears you talking to a guy who’s clearly flirting with you, he’ll wander over and join in, wrapping an arm around your waist or put his hand on your lower back and escort you to the bar when the conversation dips. It’s very possible that when you get home he kisses you extra hard to make sure you know he’s your best option though :) )

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Hell yeah he is. Your first kiss was outside Josie’s, you were both riding the high of winning a tricky case and a few celebratory beers. Matt had his hands on your waist to push you through the door into the refreshing night air, you kept complaining that it was too early to leave and you wanted to stay (all the while Josie’s literally shooing you off so she can lock up). When the door closed you turned around in his arms and grumbled about how it was too early to stop celebrating and he laughed.

“Don’t laugh! You don’t wanna stop either, right?” You pulled your hands up to rest on his chest, feeling his steady heartbeat under your fingers. “You can’t lie to me like this,” You smiled, Matt wondered if you felt his heart skip a beat there. 

“No, I don’t want it to end yet.” His hands moved from your waist to your back, your fingers played with his tie, already half undone. 

“Then... what should we do next?” You tilted your head and Matt could feel your breath on his lips, felt your heartbeat speed up a bit and tug at his tie lightly. 

It’s a soft kiss, he moves in and your lips meet and you’re both thinking “this is exactly what I thought it would be like” - everything you thought it would be. His lips are soft and they taste like the foam of the beer you’d just been drinking, but his arms around you block out any chill that wind might give you and every time your lips separate they come back together more desperately, until your fingers are in his hair and he’s pulling your body flush against his and neither of you want to forget the way your lips tingled afterwards. 

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

Matt wouldn’t make a big fuss about it. He’d be showing you how he felt in his actions long before he felt like he needed to say the words, but I think there’d just be a moment of silence between you two where nothing particularly special happens, and he’ll turn to you, find your hand to play with your fingers, maybe rest it over his heart so you knew he was being sincere, and say softly “I’m in love with you.” 

Or, you know, just super casually in the office when everyone’s around and he’s in a particularly good mood. You guys just finished deciding what to get for lunch and he’s leaving the room when he pops his head back in and says to you “oh yeah and I’ve been thinking, I’m in love with you.” and just dip. He’d get a big kick out of you, Foggy, and Karen just sitting there completely baffled. 

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

It’s like Matt’s secret fantasy to get married to you, a guilty pleasure. When he finally does it, there’s no way he’s doing it alone, so Foggy and Karen help him. Karen takes you to a jewelry store to figure out what ring Matt should get, under the guise that she’s trying to interview the shop owner or something, you fall for it. Foggy and Matt visit an old client of theirs, who has a small restaurant that you and him visit every so often. They convince the owner to get on board and decorate the whole place with flower petals and soft lighting, sets the stage for a guitarist who agrees to play your favourite sappy songs all night. Matt’s pretty traditional so he’ll do the whole romantic wine-and-dine thing before having the ring come with dessert, he’ll get on his knee and say that he’s known for a long time that he wants to spend his life with you, that he wants to promise you he’ll do whatever he can to make you happy. When you say yes he’ll jump up and sweep you off your feet in a hug. 

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

When you’re alone it’s sweetheart. He’s more of an old fashioned pet name kinda guy, babe and baby just sound weird coming from him. Sometimes you tease him into trying something different until you’re just goofing off and calling each other dumb names like “poptart” and “yogurt tube” and laugh your asses off when one of you casually uses it a month later. In public he’ll just use your name, or some shorter version of it. 

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

It’s pretty clear if you know Matt, it’s not like he tries to hide it. But he’s not like, shouting it from the rooftops, it’s more in his body language than anything else. If you’re in the room he’s stand close to you, or smile more when you talk, be faster at checking his phone when it rings in case it’s you. Sometimes he’ll even lean his head on your shoulder, if you’re in the office late and he’s tired or stressed. Foggy’s caught him laughing at a little voice memo you left for him when you were on a trip out of town and hadn’t been able to talk to him much. One time he asked Karen to describe a picture of you that was on his phone (you two had been walking through a park when an old lady stopped and asked to take your picture because “you two are so precious together”), he had a big smile on his face the whole time, Karen thought it was adorable.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

He’s modest. He’s not about to dip you and make out in front of people, and it’s not exactly professional to hold your hand in a courtroom, but if he’s in a place where he can then he’ll kiss your temple when he’s leaving or give you a quick peck on the lips. 

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

Hmmmm okay well I know this is a fluffy list but ... because he can hear your heartbeat he’s really good in bed bc he can always figure out what you like best in the moment, just sayin.

Also because of that he can tell when you’re stressed and tired just from your voice on your phone, so if you call on your way to his place he’ll make sure he has some way of making you destress when you get home! Whether that’s your favourite meal or a bath or something else ;))) He’s on it.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Cliche, he’s so corny. If he’s gonna do some grand gesture he’s gonna do something traditionally grand, just like with his proposal. That being said, he doesn’t do those things very often. Usually it’s the little things he does that prove he loves you, but for things like anniversaries he’ll be super sappy.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Yes! It’s important to both of you to support each other,, and the whole point of a relationship is to help the other grow and achieve what they want, so anything you ask of him to help he’ll do as best he can. You both prioritize your own work though, so if he has too much on his plate between the firm and being Daredevil he’ll tell you. Even if that’s the case, he’ll find some way to make it up to you later. 

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

I think Matt’s a routine guy for the most part. He doesn’t have a lot of consistency in the other aspects of his life, I think he’s enjoy having something like that in his relationship. But, he’s not adverse to doing new things, and he’ll happily join you in whatever you want to do. 

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

Matt’s easily distracted by other things in his life, so he might not be the most empathetic person off the bat, but he can also read you like a book. From your tone of voice, the way you walk into a room, even the way you’re breathing tells him everything he needs to know about what you’re feeling. 

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

It means a lot to him. He’d be willing to give up being Daredevil in the future, if you asked him to or if he felt like it was putting too much strain on the two of you. But even with that, it’s not going to be his top priority at all times. He cares about you more than anything but protecting people and taking down Hell’s Kitchen’s villains is integral to his self-worth, and until he feels like he’s done enough to let himself have that peaceful happy ending with you, he’s not gonna give it up; at least, he won’t be happy giving it up.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Around twice a month you use Matt’s kitchen to make a whole bunch of meal boxes for the homeless, it has more space than yours and you like the extra time you get with him while you cook. It’s one of Matt’s favourite things about you, how thoughtful you are, and that you’re doing something in your own way to help the people of Hell’s Kitchen. He also just loves listening to you ramble or hum while you cook, or when he gets to wrap his arms around you from behind and nuzzle his nose into your neck, maybe sway to a song you’re playing from your phone. 

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

When you’re alone together then totally, when he’s in a cuddle mood he’ll always have some form of contact, even if it’s just your knees pressed together. 

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

He’ll cling to his phone and hope you’ll call him soon. Or he’ll call you, maybe wander over to your place. He also has some saved voice memos and voicemails you’ve left him in the past, he might replay them just to hear you. 

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Oh yeah, he’ll do just about anything to keep you safe and happy. If you’re threatened for some reason, he’ll find the person and deal with that on the same night. If you’re kidnapped or hurt he wouldn’t take a break until you were back in his arms again. And if you’re just generally sad he’ll do anything you ask of him to help you feel better. 

Send me a character and one/several letter(s)

[fyexo]

200819 How Lay Zhang Claimed The Throne of M-pop

When I last spoke to Lay Zhang in 2018, he was embarking on an ambitious but daunting journey to bring Mandarin pop aka M-pop to the world. “I hope they think, ‘This artist isn’t bad,’” he had said with some trepidation in his voice. “I hope that they find my music special and maybe… they’ll want to learn more about me and Chinese music.” The singer-songwriter and producer aspired to create a true hybrid of traditional and modern music, a sound that defines our generation’s ability to package the past for the future.

Zhang, more commonly known by his stage name LAY, first debuted in 2012 as a member of world-famous K-pop group, EXO. Although he remains a member of the group, he’s spent the last couple of years in China to focus on a solo career and spotlight his own country’s burgeoning pop scene. It’s a process he kicked off with his second studio album Namanana in 2018, but he was still some time away from realizing his dream of pushing Chinese pop to a global stage.

It’s been nearly two years since our conversation for Rolling Stone India’s November 2018 cover feature, and any signs of trepidation are a thing of the past for LAY. We could chalk it up to him being two years older and wiser, but I’d like to think it’s because he kept his promise to bring M-pop to the world. If Namanana was just a dip in the pool of fusion experimentation, his latest studio album Lit is the deep dive.

“It is the evolution of M-pop for me,” LAY explains. “I wanted to take it to another level. When you hear the Chinese instruments, you know it is a different sound and vibe. The style is more pop, R&B, and hip-hop influenced with the Chinese instruments thoughtfully mixed in.” Comprising a total of 12 songs (all written and co-produced by LAY) Lit was released as two EPs instead of one LP; the first dropped in June while the second made its appearance in July. Nearly every track presents a fresh blend of traditional Chinese instruments like the hulusi, guzheng, flutes and gong with modern genres like trap, R&B, soul, hip-hop, future bass, dubstep and more. It’s a complex, refined and intricate record, utilizing production techniques that clearly outline LAY’s growth as an artist over the past two years. In retrospect, Namanana comes across a slightly more naive record–innocent and optimistic with a hope that international audiences would embrace both M-pop and LAY. Lit however seeks to take a different path and carves out the future LAY envisions with cool confidence and fearless production.

“’Lit’ continues to explore chasing your dream. This time it’s about more personal things in my life. Like hometown, family and self-doubt.” Photo: Courtesy of Zhang Yixing Studio

The tracks seesaw smoothly from Mandarin to English and back, with LAY showcasing both his vocal and rap skills. It’s an extremely powerful and expansive album, hair-raising at some moments due to the sheer surprises the artist packs in (at one point I hear what sounds like the tabla on “Call My Name” and it catches me totally off-guard.) Some of the collaborators on the record include big names like hip-hop hitmaker Murda Beatz, Grammy Award-winning producer Scott Storch, composer and producer Mitchell Owens and Grammy-nominated songwriter Mike Daley to name a few. For the title track “Lit,” LAY recruited China-native Anti-General who created a vicious and chilling trap/dubstep beat to complement lyrics that decimate LAY’s haters, gossip-mongers and the media, challenging them to come forward and take him down if they dare. The track sees the singer-songwriter rightfully crown himself a ‘king’ and leader in the music industry.

If that wasn’t enough, the music video for “Lit” is without a doubt one of the best released in 2020. With hundreds of extras, dancers, impeccable CGI and a compelling storyline, it’s more movie than music video, portraying LAY as a warrior king who refuses to be defeated. As executive producer, music director and co-choreographer on the project, LAY pays homage to China’s rich history and culture with tons of historical references and traditional symbolism. I tell him I particularly loved the symbolism of a white lotus emerging untouched and pure from the black ink–representing LAY’s rise in the industry–and he shares that the magnificent dragon that appears at the end was his personal favorite. “It was super important that we added it in,” he says. “It represents my wishes, aspirations and my relentless desire to always pursue perfection in the works that I create. I want my dancing, visuals, and music to be the very best it possibly can be.”

Lit is also thematically more complex and layered than any of LAY’s previous works, exploring concepts that revolve around confidence, love, fame, the media, success and more. “The album continues to explore chasing your dream,” the singer explains. “This time it’s about more personal things in my life. Like hometown, family and self-doubt.” A phonetic play on the word for lotus (莲 / lian) in Mandarin, ‘lit’ is a clever pun used to describe LAY’s similarity to a lotus and his prowess as a musician. He named the album after the lotus because of the symbolism of it growing and blossoming from dirt or mud. The lotus also continues the theme of duality with Lit’s two-part release, and, according to LAY’s team, “represents a new birth plus a new sound in the midst of all his past achievements.”

The album’s success more than speaks for itself– when the pre-order for Lit went live on China’s QQ Music streaming platform, nine certification records were instantly broken as it surpassed 1.5 million pre-orders within seven minutes and 19 seconds. This immediately pushed the EP to Number One on QQ Music’s daily and weekly album sales charts. Lit has also made LAY the best-selling artist in China in 2020, with a whopping 2.5 million records sold. It’s a testament to his drive and determination as an artist, the attention to detail and refusal to back down. The record’s international success was no less, hitting top 10 positions on iTunes charts across 32 countries, bagging 21 Number One spots and firmly cementing LAY’s position as the global megastar that he is.

“I don’t think people can ever understand an artist completely. But they can relate to many things. I think that is a challenge for an artist to see how they can use their music to connect with people. It is a worthy challenge.” Photo: Courtesy of Zhang Yixing Studio

Some things however, never change; brand deals, TV shows, multiple singles, EPs and collaborations keep his schedule completely booked and– just like back in 2018– it’s extremely tough to pin him down for a conversation. He’s currently in the middle of filming a reality show and has several other projects in the pipeline, but still makes the time to catch up and answer a few questions for Rolling Stone India. In this exclusive interview, LAY details his most successful record yet, the journey of finding the balance between East and West, dealing with the dark side of media attention and why the relationship between an artist and their fans needs to be a two-way street.

Congratulations on the release and tremendous success of Lit! It is an absolutely phenomenal record and I was thrilled to see you explore so many new streams of production. Can you tell me a little bit about the process of making this album and do you feel you met your own expectations for it?

For this album I wanted to mix in Chinese traditional instruments and tell Chinese stories. It is the evolution of M-pop for me. I wanted to take it to another level. When you hear the Chinese instruments you know it is a different sound and vibe. It is hard to say if I met my own expectations. As an artist you never ever feel your work is perfect. You can always find spots where you can improve. But I think what I was able to do with my team in the time we had was great.  

You dove deeper into the fusion of tradition and modernity on this album than Namanana—there was a larger variety of Chinese instruments used as well as bilingual wordplay with language in the lyrics. In what ways do you feel you’ve evolved as a producer and songwriter since that album to Lit?

I am still trying to find the right style and combination to share my music and Chinese culture with the world. Lit was an example of my growth. I had this desire to include traditional stories and instruments from Chinese culture. Trying to find the balance with the Western music was challenging. I had to think and spend a lot of time arranging the chords around and fitting everything together. Also with this album I am talking about things in a more personal level and taking time to explain with more of an artistic style. I feel like I am growing up on this journey.

Lit is the first part of a series of EPs which will make a whole LP—why did you want to release it in this format and when did you begin working on the record?

I split it into two parts to give time to people to listen to it. I feel like if I released 12 songs at once, people may not give enough time to listen to each track. But when there are just six tracks each time, then it gives people time to listen more carefully. I started this project maybe early 2019.

The title track “Lit” is about your battle with the media, hateful netizens and malicious comments/rumors. Does it get easier over time to deal with this obsessive analysis of your life or does it never really ebb away?

It will always bother you, but over time you learn to deal with it. You focus on it less and less and back on what you love doing. When I make my music or learn dance or do anything I love, I kind of forget about it. Just focus on your goals and dreams and everything else becomes background noise.

The music for “Lit” is, in my opinion, the best of 2020 so far. Can you tell me a little about your role as the executive producer and music director on this project? How did the concept come about?

I was very involved in the project. I oversaw a lot of things that happened and discussed with almost everyone on the team on how to achieve my vision. When I was making the song I was thinking about how do we share Chinese culture. I thought filming in an ancient palace would catch people’s attention. It took off from there when discussing with the director. We started adding more and more elements of Chinese culture. We were trying to tell the story of Xiang Yu, a warlord who rebelled against the mighty Qin Dynasty but wasn’t able to conquer China. I’m Xiang Yu, but I’m trying to change my fate and succeed in my goal.

You incorporated Chinese Peking Opera in the music video version of the track and visual elements of Peking Opera in the album art for “Jade”–What was the motivation behind that decision and is there a particular story that the opera section references?

I wanted to bring people back in time to ancient China. I reference the traditional Chinese story of Xiang Yu and his love, Concubine Yu, so then I added in select passages from the Peking Opera Farewell My Concubine which tells their tragic story.

You displayed your incredible skills in dancing in this music video and you recently talked about how dancing was a way for you to show the audience who you are. Did you feel a sense of relief that the audience can see you or understand you a bit better after the release of “Lit”? Can the audience ever truly understand an artist?

It feels good to know people can see me and understand me more. I don’t think people can ever understand an artist completely. But they can relate to many things. I think that is a challenge for an artist to see how they can use their music to connect with people. It is a worthy challenge.

How do you hope that the artist you are today crafts the Lay Zhang of tomorrow?

I always believe in working hard and improving. I hope that the Lay Zhang of tomorrow continues to keep looking for ways to improve his art. I hope he never gives up his dreams.

Last time we spoke, we talked about Asian traditions represented in global mainstream pop culture. Now as you’ve grown as a megastar, you are one of the leading names in pop filling that space, bringing your heritage to the stage. Why is it important for our generation to see ourselves and our histories represented on these platforms by artists?

It is important for people to remember where they come from. They should know their own history and how their culture came to be. Also, it lets other people know another culture and have a deeper understanding. It can stop miscommunication and it helps people be closer to each other.  

“I want to keep growing as an artist. But also I want to let my fans know that I am reading their comments and I see everything they say.” Photo: Courtesy of Zhang Yixing Studio

Why do fans need to see themselves in an artist? Does it work the same on the other side, do you as an artist see yourself in your fans?

I want fans to be able to relate with an artist. It is important for a fan to see themselves in artist and an artist to see themselves in a fan. When you can see each other you are able to understand each other better. You can connect with each other and really feel things.

I absolutely love the ‘Re-Reaction’ videos you have been doing for years and it means a lot to your fans that you take the time to do it. Why did you want to do this series and what does it mean to you to be able to connect with your fans like this and see them react to your work?

I am curious to know what fans and people think of my work. I want to know where I can improve. I want to keep growing as an artist. But also I want to let my fans know that I am reading their comments and I see everything they say.

Other than releasing more music, what are the rest of your plans for 2020? Do you have any film projects that you’re looking at taking up or are you planning on doing something completely different?

I am busy filming a TV drama and a few reality TV shows for the rest of 2020. A very busy schedule.

Riddhi Chakraborty @ Rolling Stone India

[imnotinclinedtomaturity]

Love Yourself (Chapter 32)

title: Love Yourself summary: A lot of things about Dan’s life are pretty great. He gets to make the music he wants, he’s got a great fanbase, and his manager is his best friend. A few things about his life suck a bit more. He’s currently lacking inspiration, he’s rather lonely, and he’s stuck in a rut. Dan’s been going to the same coffee shop for years. It’s quiet, it’s quaint, it’s near his home. Most importantly: none of the employees give a shit that’s he a world-famous singer. Things change when he meets the new barista. chapter words: 17k story words: 267k (so far) chapter: 32/? rating: m warnings: language, alcohol, sex mentions, some bi/homophobia, eventual explicit smut, some depression, consensual d/s undertones genre: singer!dan, coffee shop au, barista!phil, slow burn [[ao3]] [[first chapter]] [[previous chapter]]

a/n: um so this is like a month overdue... but it's long af. and i've cut down what was going to go in this chapter. i hope it is worth the wait <3 massive thanks as always to @auroraphilealis for being my biffle, beta, and cheerleader. she's been by my side as a beat this chapter to death and listened to a million rambles of why it was important to me to keep it all together (which i only mostly ended up doing) and other pretentious shit. she's wonderful xx

note: this chapter contains more explicit themes than past ones. unlike past chapters, outside of the marked smut, there is risque material. skim at your own discretion if you are uncomfortable, but it wasn't set up in a way i could mark

By the time filming had finally ended, Dan felt emotionally fucking exhausted. Being so open and honest on national television, and having to be so careful with his words, had drained him of just about everything. There wasn’t an ounce of propriety left in him, and at this point, all he wanted was to be taken care of and not have to fucking think for a little bit.

Letting go — whatever that meant — was impossible on set. From the second he’d finished performing his song and had ducked backstage, he’d been craving a hug from Phil — a proper hug, not the one-armed bro-hug Phil had given him. But stagehands were running everywhere, and there didn’t seem to be a bloody centimeter of privacy, so Dan resisted. The minute he got in the uber, he could collapse against Phil.

But for now, resting his foot against Phil’s as he stood behind the stage wall would have to suffice. Dan closed his eyes, replaying his interview in his head as he listened to the loud hum of the audience laughing and applauding and — holy fuck. He’d actually just done that. He’d actually talked about his most personal matters, something he’d taken great lengths to keep secret, in front of all of those people. The studio held what? Two hundred people?

Two hundred people who were now privy to Dan’s rambling thoughts about sexuality and boxes, who now had a whole fountain of knowledge about Dan’s sexual and romantic preferences. Two hundred people who had seen Dan be open and vulnerable and honest.

The gravity of the interview smacked Dan in the face, and that’s when he realized, really truly realized, that those two hundred people were just the beginning. In a few short hours, that interview would play on national American tv, would stream on youtube worldwide. And sure, he had known that while he was filming, but he hadn’t known. Not in the way it was all hitting him now.

Dan swallowed thickly and let his hand brush against Phil’s. He wanted out of here. He wanted a hug. He wanted to think about anything other than this interview, his fate, his audience, just for a little bit anyway.

The twenty minutes it took to get an all clear lasted about five years. Dan was so on edge and ready to leave that he was already ordering a car before a stagehand had even finished dismissing them. Without waiting for proper goodbyes, Dan seized Phil’s wrist and dragged him out of the studio, down the lift, out the back door — and not the back door that fans often waited for celebrities at, either.

Dan felt a wave of relief rush through him when he burst out of the exit and found a black car already stalled next to the curb. Rushing over to the car, Dan wrenched open the back door and ushered Phil inside.

The relief coursing through Dan’s veins ran cold when the driver greeted him though. The way he confirmed Dan’s name, the breathlessness in his voice and the distinct spark in his eye — they were the unmistakable signs that someone recognized him.

Perhaps the ride back to the hotel wouldn’t be as relaxing as Dan had hoped.

Still, Dan shuffled in after Phil, leaving the full space of the middle seat between them. And less than a block later, Dan’s hunch was proven right when the driver asked which show he had been recording for at Rockefeller Center.

Not wanting to actually engage with this stranger, Dan grunted a reply and made a show of putting in his headphones, even though he didn’t actually play any music. It may have been rude, but it worked. The driver didn’t ask any follow up questions.

Of course, that didn’t stop his gaze from flickering into the rear view mirror every other bloody second. Dan felt like an animal in a glass box, on display and on edge. Phil was right there, but Dan didn’t feel like he could reach out, not under such intense observation.

Like Dan had told himself and Phil and Louise a million times, tonight was about talking about bisexuality, about giving that topic all the attention it deserved, not about him and Phil. The last thing Dan wanted was to have their relationship inadvertently outed by a random crew member or uber driver.

So Dan held back. Instead of sinking into his boyfriend’s side and letting himself get lost in Phil, Dan stayed on his side of the backseat and fell prey to one of the most volatile coping strategies he had — the internet.

Dan googled the average number of viewers of The Tonight Show and discovered it was over two million a night — and that wasn’t including the extra views that youtube brought in. And that, naturally, brought Dan to his next google search, where he discovered that The Tonight Show’s youtube channel had a whopping nineteen million subscribers. Subscribers who would undoubtedly have access to Dan’s rants about bisexuality, and his recently failed relationship, in just a few hours time.

Overwhelmed by the sheer significance of everything, Dan spread his legs obnoxiously far apart so that one knee pressed into Phil’s. Phil nudged back deliberately, a silent reassurance of his presence, a subtle demonstration of his support.

It wasn’t the bear hug Dan craved, but it was enough for now. The slight pressure of Phil’s leg against his own helped Dan stay grounded as he switched gears and fell down a wikipedia black hole about most viewed celebrity interviews. Unsurprisingly, videos about famous entertainers coming out were high on the list.

Right. No pressure there.

By the time the car pulled up to the hotel, Dan’s desire for real physical contact had developed into flat out desperation. He just needed this goddamn weight to ease back for a fucking minute.

Without waiting for Phil, Dan hiked his backpack over his shoulder and bolted into the hotel, through the lobby, and straight to the lifts.

It seemed to take bloody forever for a lift to actually arrive, but it took even longer for Phil to catch up. Dan had to pass on two elevators before he finally saw Phil entering the hotel, lumbering awkwardly across the lobby, weighed down with Dan’s guitar.

Oops.

In Dan’s haste to make it to their room, he’d forgotten that his guitar — his favorite guitar — was in the trunk. Eyeing Phil’s lopsided stance, Dan grimaced and took a small step towards him.

“Sorry,” Dan said apologetically as he pressed the up button for the third time. “Lemme take that,” he offered, reaching out for the worn handle of his guitar case.

With absolutely none of the coordination that Dan had developed over the years, Phil switched the guitar to his opposite hand, suddenly making it much harder for Dan to easily swipe it out of his grip.

“Phillll,” Dan whined, reaching across Phil’s body for the handle.

“Dannnnnn,” Phil retaliated as he stuck his tongue out and held the guitar even further out of Dan’s reach. His bicep was quaking, and his body definitely wasn’t used to the extra awkwardly large weight, but Dan couldn’t help appreciating how fucking sexy it was that, for the first time in ages, he had someone that was willing — determined, even — to carry Dan’s shit.

The bell on another lift finally dinged, and the doors opened. Dan’s attention snapped from Phil’s playful face to the empty lift. Relief rushing in just by the sheer presence of the lift, Dan gestured for Phil to take the lead. Luckily, it was that in-between time of night when most people were at dinner or something of the sort, and they had the lift to themselves. Dan took advantage of the brief moment of privacy and stepped in close to Phil, his knuckles gently brushing against Phil’s hand, the loving fingers that were inexpertly wrapped around the handle of Dan’s heavy guitar.

“Thanks,” Dan murmured, the teasingly childish tone suddenly vanishing, and a disgustingly sweet one taking over. In what he hoped wasn’t too cheesy of a move, Dan closed the small distance between them and pressed a chaste kiss to Phil’s cheek.

Brows furrowed, Phil cocked his head at Dan. “Dan, it’s just a guitar, I don’t mind.”

“Mmm,” Dan hummed, stepping back to his place. He watched the numbers climb as they passed floor after floor, observing Phil out of the corner of his eye. Phil was quiet, but shot Dan an odd look, his expression a mix of pointed and sad. It utterly baffled Dan for a second — until he remembered their conversation from yesterday morning, that was.

Phil didn’t have to say a word, Dan could practically hear him pointing out that his reaction was a bit unhealthy. Appreciation was fine, sure, but the amount of surprise he felt at a partner doing something so simplistically nice probably didn’t speak highly of his past relationships.

Wanting out of that moment before Phil could force Dan to properly think about his reaction, Dan darted out of the lift as soon as the doors opened and hurried down the hallway. Behind him, Phil’s footsteps echoed down the hallway, pausing just out of reach when Dan came to a halt outside of their door and fumbled to find his room key.

Maybe nerves or exhilaration or exhaustion was still gripping Dan, or maybe it was the knowledge that he had Phil and a hotel room and a foreign city all to himself tonight, but it took him three tries of swiping their card before the light finally flickered green.

The click of the latch was a wave of relief, and Dan found himself shoving their door open with far more force and enthusiasm than was necessary. Without waiting for Phil, Dan barrelled into their room and crossed the space in three quick strides, coming to a stop in front of their bed and spinning around to stare impatiently at Phil.

Fucking finally, they were alone.

Phil was a few steps behind him, and didn’t seem to have any of the urgency that Dan had. Dan watched anxiously as Phil walked towards him at the pace of an impregnated, fat sloth. Carefully, and ungodly slowly, Phil sat the guitar down in front of the bed and finally, finally his hands were free.

Dan didn’t wait for Phil to straighten up before launching himself into Phil’s arms, physically demanding to be held. The sudden weight of Dan threw Phil off balance, causing him to stumble backwards towards the bed.

“Oi,” Phil gasped as he tumbled to the bed, just barely managing to not fall all the way onto his back under Dan’s momentum. Even as he fell, his hands landed on Dan’s hips and pulled him down to the bed too. Just for a moment, Dan found himself awkwardly leaning into Phil, not quite sitting, not quite standing.

With a flustered giggle, Dan shifted his body so he was straddling Phil’s lap instead. Dan’s hands slid up from Phil’s waist, and looped around his neck, finally pulling him into the private and intimate embrace Dan had been dying for.

“Well hello there,” Phil greeted, his hands dipping under the hem of Dan’s jumper, his fingers thumbing over the jut of Dan’s hipbone. Phil’s voice was low, and his touch was sultry, and Dan couldn’t hold back a shaky sigh. He felt so damn needy, and the soft drag of Phil’s fingers on his bare skin was already quieting his screaming mind some.

Dan shifted back up, just enough so that he could look Phil in the eye. The cheeky and smug look on Phil’s face wasn’t surprising — maybe someday Phil would stop looking so satisfied about the reactions he pulled from Dan, but they clearly weren’t there yet.

“Hi,” Dan responded with a smile, not even bothering to hide the effect Phil was having on him. Dan tipped his head forward, closing the small distance between them, and pressed his lips to Phil’s.

Despite Phil’s teasing tone, he let Dan take what he wanted, matching Dan kiss for kiss and touch for touch. Dan wasn’t sure who licked whose lips first, who opened their mouth for who first. He did, however, realize that it only took a short minute for them to escalate from sweet kisses to proper snogging.

Before they could get too carried away, Dan pulled back, panting slightly. Even though he needed a decent lung capacity for singing, it seemed that kissing Phil for two minutes stole his breath in a way that a long high note never could.

“Where’s — the room service — menu?” Dan asked, his words coming in pants as his gaze drifted to the bedside table and then the desk, searching for a helpful booklet.

Phil fingers slipped down from the middle of Dan’s waist to the low hem of his pants. His brows furrowed and he cocked his head to the side. “Why?” he asked.

Huffing an exaggerated sigh, Dan shot Phil an incredulous look. “Because I’ve had a crazy fucking day and would like to let loose a little…?” After knowing Phil for nearly three full months, Dan was rather surprised to have to point out the obvious to him.

“Well yeah,” Phil huffed and cleared his throat. His pupils were blown wide, and now it was Dan’s turn to feel pleased with himself; he might be a mess from two minutes of kissing Phil, but Phil was just as flustered after two minutes of kissing Dan. “I know that much.” Phil rolled his eyes and slid his hands out of Dan’s trousers to a less scandalous spot, tracing his thumbs lightly Dan’s prominent hip bones. “I just meant, I’m surprised that you don’t want to go out since we only have a few nights here.”

Dan shrugged, drawing his bottom lip between his teeth as he contemplated Phil’s comment. He’d definitely had some great nights in the bars of New York, but they’d all come with the unfortunate price tag of at least half a dozen paparazzi photos. That wasn’t what Dan wanted tonight — tonight he just wanted Phil.

Tentatively, Dan let his hands drift from Phil’s shoulders up to his bare neck, his thumbs softly rubbing along Phi’s pulse points. “I mean… It’s not that I don’t want to enjoy New York, I just…” Dan couldn’t help the way his gaze drifted down from Phil’s, landing instead on his lips. Coyly — or at least he hoped it was coy and sexy — Dan slipped his hands down Phil’s neck and under the collar of his button-up shirt. “I’d rather not be bothered by a fan or the media tonight, ya know?” Just in case the meaning behind his words wasn’t clear enough, Dan dipped his thumb further down Phil’s shirt and grazed his collarbone suggestively.

“Mmm, that’s fair,” Phil murmured. Taking Dan’s lead, Phil’s hands nudged up higher on Dan’s hips, pushing his leather jacket and tight jumper up even higher so Phil’s fingers could brush over the bare skin near the top of Dan’s ribs. “But what if I told you I knew a place where we’d be left alone?”

Cocking an eyebrow, Dan straightened up. He’d been in New York. He’d been to elite clubs, he’d been to dive bars, he’d been to locals only restaurants — and on every occasion, he’d been photographed. In his experience, this was a city of famous people, and in turn, that meant it was a city of photographs and tabloids, a city of journalists searching for their next break.

“What kind of place is this?” Dan asked skeptically.

“Well,” Phil bit his lip, suddenly looking a little hesitant. “Technically it’s a gay club. But the standard cover is high enough to keep out most fans, and they’ve got an absurd amount of security, just in case.”

“How do you know about a place like that?” Dan pried; he’d been to New York half a dozen times and he’d never heard of any exclusive gay clubs. But even as Dan questioned Phil’s knowledge, he could feel the excitement growing in his stomach. He hadn’t been to a proper gay bar since he was seventeen, and never with a partner — at least not someone who wasn’t just a fling. He couldn’t deny that the idea was hotter than hell.

“Oh. Uh, well,” Phil shrugged awkwardly, sounding shifty. His eyes darted away from Dan’s, his bottom lip caught between his teeth. “Another gay youtuber has a friend who is a bouncer there?” he explained, but he sounded so unsure that it came out as a question.

Dan eyed Phil suspiciously. “How jealous should I be of this guy right now?”

“Of Tyler? Not at all. No way. Never.” Phil shook his head vehemently, his gaze flicking back to Dan.

“And Tyler is…?” Dan prompted slowly, raising his eyebrows and shaking his head.

“He’s just a casual friend who lives in LA. We collaborate when we’re in the same city,” Phil shrugged.

Dan narrowed his eyes skeptically. “And the bouncer?” he pushed, sensing that there was something that Phil wasn’t admitting.

Phil’s gaze shifted to the side again, his cheeks growing red. The grip on Dan’s chest slipped, Phil’s hands dropping down to the base of Dan’s hips.

Dan’s heart followed Phil’s hands, plummeting down into his stomach and then somehow sinking even further. Just from Phil’s reaction, Dan knew he’d figured it out.

“It was one time and really didn’t matter,” Phil admitted, sounding defeated, embarrassed. “But he’ll let us both in for free and there won’t be cameras there.”

Dan was surprised to find that he wasn’t just jealous, he was almost repulsed. His stomach churned as his brain supplied images of Phil and some gorgeous boy tangled in bed together, making him feel nauseous.

“I’m not sure I want to meet a guy you’ve fucked,” Dan said, aiming for teasing and joking, but as soon as he said it, he was sure the insecurity shined through. “I mean, what if he’s cuter than me?” Dan chuckled half-heartedly, doing his best to salvage his dignity. He really didn’t want Phil to think he was a jealous dick or clingy or something else completely annoying. Even if it was kind of true.

Phil laughed — genuinely laughed, not an awkward chuckle like before. “First off,” he started, his voice actually light and humorous, not forced casual like Dan’s. “There’s no way anyone has ever, or could ever, be cuter than you. Not that I'm aiming to find someone else.” As if to prove his point, Phil’s fingers dipped into Dan’s jeans and pointedly hooked under his pants. It wasn’t just a little this time; now Phil’s hands were properly inside of Dan’s pants, his fingers inching towards more intimate parts of Dan’s body. “And second off,” Phil continued, “I suffered through two months of knowing you were sleeping with someone else. I think five seconds of interaction with a random guy I slept with a year ago doesn’t compare.”

“Uh!!” Dan gasped in protest, his voice high pitched and offended. “I didn’t sleep with her for the last month and you know it!”

“Yeah, now I know,” Phil agreed begrudgingly. “But I didn’t then and I was so damn envious.” Phil licked his lips slowly. “Plus,” he added, his voice lower and gruff. “You were sleeping with her in the beginning, and I had to watch you come in with marks all up and down your neck that proved it.” As if to make his point, Phil dragged his fingers along Dan’s sensitive neck possessively, thumbing over the spot where coverup was hiding a hickey on Dan’s pulse point.

Dan’s stomach twisted in reaction, and a shiver ran down his back — whether it was the clear jealous attitude or the cursing that was turning him on, he wasn’t sure. There was a part of him that was willing to forfeit embracing any amount of New York tonight, that wanted to rock his hips forward and show Phil just how little reason he had to be jealous now, to take full advantage of the nice hotel room they had.

“Come on, let me take you out, buy you a few drinks. Maybe a nice dinner first, if you’re hungry,” Phil pleaded.

There was another part of Dan — an unexpectedly bigger part of him — that was itching to go out with Phil, to find a different way to show Phil that Dan was all his, even if it wasn’t the approach he was used to. And besides, after so many months of being dragged out by his ex, something in Dan couldn’t help finding the fact that Phil wanted to take him out, just for the sake of being together, incredibly sexy.

“Alright,” Dan agreed, conceding even as he let his hips suggestively rock against Phil’s just once — he couldn’t resist, not if he wasn’t going to have the chance to do so for a while. “We should definitely have something to eat first, though. I haven’t eaten nearly enough today and I reckon I’ll be drunk after half a cocktail if we don’t get food.”

“Fair enough,” Phil agreed as his hands slipped out of Dan’s pants, lightly gripping Dan’s hips and guiding him backwards. Tilting slightly to the side, Phil fished his phone out of his back pocket. “What kind of food do you want, then?”

“Doesn’t matter. Something with a view of the city might be nice,” Dan suggested with a small shrug. Sliding all the way off Phil’s lap, Dan made his way to the mirror, fluffing at his hair. The makeup from earlier still looked nice; the eyeliner wasn’t smudgy and the color on his cheeks still seemed to accentuate his features. Eyes meeting Phil in the mirror, Dan added, “Nowhere so fancy we can’t wear the clothes we’re wearing to the club, though.”

He knew if they had to come back to the hotel to change there was no way Phil was convincing him to leave again.

“I know just the place,” Phil said decisively, his gaze turning back to his phone.

*******

Less than an hour later, an uber was dropping Dan and Phil just outside of Times Square with an apology that they couldn’t get them any closer to their destination. During what felt like an infinitely-long car ride for Dan’s curious nerves, Phil had refused to tell Dan where he was taking him, and for a split second, Dan had been worried Phil was going to usher him to one of the hot dog or pizza carts littered around the square before leading him to a bench to people watch.

Not that Dan was strictly opposed to street food — he certainly didn’t want Phil to splurge on another fancy meal so soon after their last date. But also, he’d learned from experience what some vendors’ food will do to stomachs, and if they were planning to head to a club later that night, they should at least try to spare themselves diarrhea and food poisoning.

Phil took a hard right before they made it to the throngs of people though, his hand on Dan’s lower back to guide him in the right direction. The sudden turn led them… into the valet entrance to the Marriott?

Dan turned to look at Phil, but his face was perfectly neutral. “Phil, did you bring us halfway across Manhattan to eat at a different hotel’s restaurant?” Dan asked dubiously, letting Phil lead him through the revolving doors and into the hotel lobby.

“Yeah, we’re going to eat at the touristy hotel bar of a place we aren’t even staying,” Phil responded sarcastically. His hand dropped from Dan’s back, something that disappointed Dan until he followed Phil’s gaze to a gaggle of teenagers across the lobby. “Just trust me, Howell,” Phil teased, flashing Dan a coy smile as he pressed the call button for the lift, the doors immediately opening.

“If you insist,” Dan smirked, stepping into the lift after Phil. “You’re on thin ice though, Lester.” Despite the mock-warning in his voice, Dan quickly closed the gap between them when the doors closed and pressed a quick kiss to Phil’s cheek.

The doors parted again just seconds later, letting them out at the third floor. Confidently, Phil led them down the hallway, only to stop in front of another set of lifts. Dan cocked an eyebrow but wordlessly followed Phil as the doors to the next lift opened.

“Those only go to hotel rooms past this floor,” Phil cryptically explained as he pressed the button for the forty-eighth floor. This ride was longer, giving Phil enough time to lean in and kiss Dan on the lips. “I can’t promise this place will be free of photographers, so get it out of your system.”

Despite his giggles, Dan leaned forward and captured Phil’s lips with his own, this time lingering long enough to capture Phil’s lower lip between his teeth, long enough to nip at the soft and sensitive flesh inside Phil’s mouth. Long enough to reach for Phil’s hips and slip his fingers beneath Phil’s clothes, suggestively thumbing across the bare skin of Phil’s waist.

“Mmff!” Phil let out a throaty noise halfway between a moan and a reprimand, as he pulled back from Dan’s kiss.

“What?” Dan asked innocently, even as he let his fingers drift towards Phil’s arse. “You said to get it out of my system.”

“Well I didn’t think you’d feel me up in a lift,” Phil shot back snarkily.

“Mmmm,” Dan hummed. “Maybe I could resist feeling my boyfriend up in a lift if he didn’t look so damn gorgeous.” Dan eyed the denim jacket Phil was wearing, his gaze lingering on the fitted shirt covered with tiny pale flowers that was buttoned up all the way to his Adam’s apple, drawing Dan’s attention to Phil’s neck. The deep, pinot-noir purple stood out starkly against Phil’s pale skin, bringing out his eyes and making him look unfairly quirky and sexy at the same time.

The bell dinged and the doors parted, cutting off Phil’s reply. Dan snapped his mouth shut, but let himself continue eying Phil as he exited the lift — he could only do so much to tamp down his blatant arousal tonight, when Phil looked like that.

Phil didn’t hesitate to stride up to the host stand and give his name — that was something Dan was still getting used to, a partner being willing to take the lead in moments like this. It was proving to be far hotter than Dan had ever expected it to be.

Dan was still processing everything when the hostess started leading them towards a table. The restaurant seemed to form a circle around the lifts, and all of the exterior walls were replaced with grand windows overlooking the New York skyline.

Dan had only gotten one foot on the raised platform before Phil’s hands were softly gripping his shoulders. It was a good thing, too; Dan was fairly certain he would have fallen if Phil hadn’t steadied him. Beneath their feet, the platform was moving.

“What the…?” Dan breathed, baffled by the way the top step was moving but the bottom wasn’t.

“Look outside,” Phil murmured, his voice just centimeters from Dan’s ear. Following Phil’s suggestion, Dan glanced out the nearest window. Now that Dan was looking closer, the city around them seemed to be shifting slightly, and it took him a moment to realize that it was the restaurant that was rotating ever so slowly, not the skyscrapers outside.

“Holy shit,” Dan mumbled quietly, coming to a halt when the hostess gestured to a small table along one of the massive windows.

Dan sat, too captivated by the view of this foreign city to pay attention to the muted conversation Phil was having with the woman. Outside, Dan could see building after building, could see the moon rising over the water. It was a spectacular view, and judging by the slow rotation, it was only a portion of what he was going to see tonight.

It wasn’t until Phil’s knee gently bumped against his that Dan tore his gaze away from the window and turned back to face his boyfriend instead.

“When did you have time to make a reservation?” Dan asked stupidly, his brain still struggling to wrap itself around the amazingly gorgeous restaurant Phil had brought him to.

“While you were primping for tonight,” Phil teased. His hand slid across the table just enough to brush his knuckles across the back of Dan’s hand.

Dan’s hand, the one that wasn’t just barely touching Phil, flew up to self-consciously pat his curly hair.

“Stop,” Phil gently ordered. “You look good. Really good. Primping time was well used.”

Dan’s hand fell back to the table, his thumb immediately tapping out a mindless rhythm. He couldn’t believe Phil had taken the twenty minutes of downtime to book them a window-side table. “You’re amazing,” Dan sighed, awe dripping from his voice. “Seriously amazing.”

Phil tilted his head to the side, shrugging his shoulder as he flashed Dan a cheeky grin. “That is what they call me,” he said playfully.

“Oh fuck off,” Dan huffed, unable to stop the wide smile that spread across his face and the way his hand pressed against Phil’s. Teenage Phil really had picked out the perfect username for himself — amazing was by far the best word to describe him.

Dan’s gaze drifted back to the window. The view was slowly twisting so that they could see more and more of the river. The water was twinkling, reflecting both the moon and the bright lights of the city.

“Wait,” Dan exclaimed suddenly, his head whipping from the window to Phil. “Don’t you get motion sickness?”

Phil shrugged, a soft smile on his face. “Usually. But the restaurant moves so slowly that it won’t bother me as long as I don’t look outside for too long.”

Huffing a small sigh, Dan frowned slightly. “We could have gone to a restaurant where the view wouldn’t make you sick,” Dan pointed out.

“We could have,” Phil agreed easily. “But I knew you’d like this one.”

“Oh,” Dan mumbled quietly, a smile pulling at his lips. He turned his attention to the menu, if for no other reason than an easy excuse for hiding the blush that was flushing his cheeks. Phil ignored his dinner menu in favor of the black, leather-bound drink book on the table.

“Does your hatred for white wine extend to champagne, as well?” Phil asked idly, not looking up from the menu he was studying.

“Definitely not,” Dan denied vehemently, smiling stupidly at the thought of Phil ordering them champagne. “Champagne is its own branch of alcohol and it’s wonderful.”

“Good,” Phil folded the alcohol menu primly, and looked back up at Dan. “Because you were truly exceptional tonight, and deserve to be spoiled.”

“Phi-illlll,” Dan whined, bringing his menu up to hide the redness of his face with such force that it accidentally smacked him in the nose. His stomach tightened at the compliment, a shiver ran down his spine.

“Oh I forgot,” Phil said innocuously, his voice far too knowing to actually be innocent. “Does someone have a bit of a praise kink?” Phil continued with fake-casualness, his voice low and quiet. Husky. Sexy.

Dan dropped his forehead to the table with a resounding thunk, the menu shifting to cover the back of his head as his hands shielded his face from Phil’s view. “You aren’t supposed to take advantage of that in public.”

“Oops!” Phil laughed, actually laughed, as he kicked a foot out to nudge Dan’s. “Sit up and pick out what you want for an appetizer, babe.”

Slightly mortified, and more than a little flustered, Dan rose up again, his gaze steadfastly fixed on his menu. It was a fruitless effort, though — he could feel Phil’s eyes boring into him, which did nothing to calm his pounding heart and swooping stomach.

He realized they’d been handed a prix-fixe menu, meaning they would each get three courses for the flat rate of… holy shit. Eighty nine dollars.

At this rate, it was getting hard to tell if Phil’s tastes in restaurants was just as fancy as Dan’s, or if he was trying far too hard to impress him. In the months that Dan had gotten to know Phil, he’d learned that Phil was generally somewhat frugal — though never to a fault. In his business and personal life, Phil was always conscious about how he earned and spent his money. That hardly seemed in line with the extravagant dinners he was taking Dan to.

“Phil,” Dan started carefully, planning to test the waters and see if Phil would want to switch to the normal menu, one where they could share an appetizer and skip dessert (and shave a few dollars off the bill).

“Hush up and choose your appetizer, Howell,” Phil said without looking up from his own menu.

“Fine, I will, but…” Dan trailed off, his eyes darting out the window to avoid looking at Phil for a second before drifting back.

Phil folded his menu in front of him and looked at Dan with an unreadable stare. “But what?”

“But… you know not every date has to be expensive food and fancy restaurants, right? I’d be fine with Dominos and your sofa.”

“And I’m sure we’ll have our fair share of nights in with too much pizza. But I also like quality food and nice restaurants, and I know you do, too. So order whatever you want and enjoy tonight.”

Dan’s face must have betrayed the small bit of wariness that was still gnawing at his stomach, because Phil continued, “Look, if it makes you feel better, I promise you can pay next time we go somewhere expensive, okay?”

Dan smiled, his heart melting. “I adore you, Phil Lester.”

“And I you, Daniel Howell.”

****

The food was heavenly. Dan opted for lighter, mostly vegan dishes — a salad and a lovely squash roast — because he didn’t want to feel bloated and lethargic if they were going out after dinner. Phil had seafood instead and offered Dan small tastes of it, holding his fork across the table and letting Dan bite off it.

Dinner was lovely, but the company was even better. By the time their waiter was bringing them dessert menus, they were both well on their way to properly tipsy.

Sometime during the main course, Phil had ordered a second bottle of Dom Perignon. The bubbles — and ever growing feelings of infatuation — were going straight to Dan’s head, making him feel giddy in a way he couldn’t ever remember feeling before.

Around them, the restaurant was quietly buzzing with the Friday night crowd, the bar growing slightly more crowded as the night went on. Sometime in the past hour, the overhead lamps had dimmed, the lights of the city outside casting a soft glow over their table. They’d made a full circle, rotating around to see the empire state building and central park, and now they were back to the river.

Still though, Dan only had eyes for Phil.

Under the table, their feet were entwined together, mostly shrouded by the long white table cloth — although the more champagne Dan drank, the less he cared. A few times, when Phil gave him a particularly sweet compliment or an especially sexy look, Dan couldn’t resist brushing his fingertips over Phil’s or letting his toe drag up the inside of Phil’s leg.

In typical Phil fashion, he turned his full attention away from Dan for the first time all night when the dessert menus came, reading over the options with impressively deep intense concentration. Dan didn’t mind — he knew he couldn’t compete with sweet food, but he also knew dessert would come and go, and Phil would be his again.

“Dan!” Phil exclaimed, pointing to the very first item on the menu. “Look, they’ve made cake out of cheese! That shouldn’t get to count as a dessert!”

Dan giggled, his eyes still trained on Phil. “You know, not everyone has the same weird aversion to cheese as you, Philly.”

Phil didn’t respond, too engrossed in the list. “Oooo, look, they have profiteroles and — ew!” Head shooting back up, Phil gave Dan a genuinely horrified expression. His voice was just a hair too loud for inside, especially for the posh and intimate restaurant, but it was fine. “Who orders a cheese plate for dessert!?”

Fuck, Dan was so soft for this boy, this boy who had such bullheaded opinions over what counted as dessert, but was entirely open-minded about anything bigger. “What can I say, the world is full of zanies and fools.”

“Who don’t believe in sensible rules?” Phil quipped back with his brows raised knowingly, not quite singing, but also not exactly just talking either.

“Exactly,” Dan agreed with a nod, letting his eyes linger for just a second before finally flitting down to read his own dessert menu. There was an undefined sappy thought beating at the edge of Dan’s mind, something about how Phil felt like the fairytale impossible thing that happened to him, but he shoved it aside — that was too much even for his champagne-addled heart.

Scanning his menu, Dan’s gaze caught on one of the desserts — not because of the ingredients, but because of the suggestive name.

“I reckon I’ll order the Cherry Explosion,” Dan said, voice low as he looked up at Phil through his darker-than-usual eyelashes. “Hopefully it’ll be a preview of what’s to come later tonight.”

Phil held his gaze for a long second, a slow smirk spreading across his face and a playful twinkle in his eye. “You know,” he started slowly, leaning forward. Beneath the table, a warm hand suddenly landed on Dan’s thigh, fingertips dipping between his legs to rub along the inseam of Dan’s trousers. “I’m not normally a big fan of cherries, but if that’s what gets you there, I can get used to it.”

Dan’s jaw dropped open — both at Phil’s words and at the way his hand was slowly creeping higher and higher up Dan’s leg.

“I don’t — I’m not —” Dan stuttered, trying to defend why he had cherry lube at home, but there wasn’t a restaurant appropriate way to say that he got used to keeping it on hand in hopes that it would entice his ex-boyfriend to eat him out. “I don’t love the taste that much!” Dan finally managed.

Phil’s hand froze on Dan’s leg, his brows shooting up and a knowing smile growing on his lips. “So the flavor isn’t for your benefit, hmm?”

Shrugging, Dan did his best to keep his face neutral and voice steady — but the heat on his cheeks and his quickened breath told him he wasn’t doing a great job of either. “A lad can hope…” Dan muttered weakly.

The knowing smile on Phil’s lips turned positively lewd, his tongue peeking out to wet his bottom lip, his eyes darkening with lust. “Hope for what, Daniel?” Phil challenged.

Dan swallowed thickly, squirming beneath Phil’s intense gaze. He fiddled with the edge of his menu, resisting the simultaneous urges to knock Phil’s hand off his leg so he could think straight and pull Phil’s hand a few centimeters higher to where Dan really wanted it. “You know… something besides just… fingers,” Dan murmured, dropping his eyes to the table.

“I think most people don’t need flavors for a simple blowjob,” Phil pointed out, a smug edge to his voice.

“Philllll,” Dan whined, his face growing impossibly redder. “That’s not what I meant and you know it,” he grumbled into his flute of champagne, refusing to look Phil in the eye.

“Look at me, babe,” Phil demanded softly. Head still bowed, Dan shifted his eyes to look up at Phil, whose fingers resumed their teasing caress along Dan’s inner thigh. “And tell me what you meant.”

“I didn’t mean there,” Dan whined, praying Phil wouldn’t actually make him confess that he liked being eaten out in the middle of a fancy New York restaurant. That’d he’d settle for the blatant implication.

Phil looked like he might push it, but Dan was saved by the timely appearance of their waiter, back to take their dessert order.

Without taking his eyes off Dan, Phil ordered, his voice returning to its normal volume, a hint of huskiness still laced in. “I’ll have the profiterole, please, and he’ll have the cherry explosion.”

Pointedly, Phil squeezed Dan’s thigh, and Dan felt like he was on the verge of cracking, on the verge of begging Phil to dine and dash, to skip the club, to go back to their hotel — or fuck it, get a room in this one — and fuck him already. The subtle way Phil took charge, the way he challenged Dan in ways none of his past partners ever had, the way he made Dan feel so bloody taken care of — fuck, it was driving Dan insane.

“Bloody hell, Phil. You’re gonna kill me.”

*****************

“We’re here, babe, you have to get out of the car,” Phil insisted with a giggle. He was standing on the curb, holding the car door open and offering Dan his hand.

“I caaaan’t,” Dan whined, his words slurring together thanks to the full bottle of champagne he’d drank at dinner. He petulantly crossed his arms and stayed firmly planted in his seat.

“This nice man has’ta go pick up his next people, though,” Phil pointed out, flashing an apologetic glance towards the front of the car.

“But Phil, if I get out, then e’ryone’ll see,” Dan grumbled. Phil’s eyes followed Dan’s gesture towards his lap, a saucy smirk quickly pulling at his lips.

Dan’d been half-hard since they’d ordered dessert, and his trousers were still pulling tightly across his crotch, a telling tent forming in the center. Phil had been entirely unhelpful during the ride to the club, alternating between teasing Dan about how easily excitable he was and letting his hand wander up and down Dan’s thigh, not giving him the chance to calm down. They’d both had too much champagne to be discreet about it, and Dan hoped the driver wasn’t too scarred — he hadn’t said anything to reprimand them, at least.

“It’s dark out, no one’ll notice,” Phil argued, threading his hand through Dan’s and tugging gently. The awkward reach across the backseat was enough to unsteady Phil, and he braced himself on the doorframe, wobbling just a bit. “C’mon, as soon as we’re inside, you can get us a seat on the sofas and I’ll get us drinks, okay?”

Dan peered around Phil and saw that there wasn’t a line for the club. Maybe they were early — this was New York after all — or maybe this place really was as fancy as Phil had insinuated. Regardless of the reason, that meant Dan would have to interact with minimal people before he could sit down again. Plus, maybe a few minutes away from Phil would help Dan cool down. Lord knew he needed it.

“Here,” Phil let go of Dan’s hand and shrugged out of his denim jacket, offering it to Dan. “You can hold this in front of you in you want.”

“You’ll be cold, though,” Dan said guiltily.

“Not for long if you hurry up and c’mon!” Phil smiled widely, his tongue peeking out more than usual, and shook the jacket at Dan.

Giving in with a disgruntled grumble, Dan gratefully took Phil’s jacket as he climbed out of the uber, only stumbling a little, which he thought was probably a win given that he was definitely both tipsy and turned on. Dan tried to casually sling the jacket over his arm, aiming for a good boyfriend carrying his partner’s coat vibe, and not horny twenty-something hard because of some light pawing.

Phil’s hand landed on Dan’s lower back, guiding Dan towards the entrance. He dropped his hand as they got close, and reached into his back pocket for his wallet.

He started rifling through, for what Dan wasn’t sure, but the brown-haired bouncer suddenly smiled widely, seeming to recognize Phil, and told him not to worry about it.

Shit — the bouncer! Dan’s drunken and infatuated mind had forgotten that the only reason Phil knew about this place was because he’d fucked the bouncer. Or maybe the bouncer had fucked him. At this point, Dan honestly didn’t know which was worse to think about.

“Well, hey there Phil,” the bouncer greeted, his gaze blatantly raking up and down Phil’s form. “I didn’t know you were in town.”

“Hi, Oliver,” Phil greeted politely, smiling but keeping his eyes fixed on the other boy’s face. Dan couldn’t help but size up this lad who had slept with Phil; he had chocolate brown hair, curls, and deep eyes — just like Dan. In many ways, looking at this guy was like looking in a warped mirror.

Except for in one very important way.

This guy was built in a way Dan never had been, nor would ever be. His biceps were literally bulging against his sleeves, and Dan could see the sharp outline of defined pectoral muscles under the thin material covering his shirt. Jesus, it was March! Shouldn’t this guy be wearing a jacket or something? Not showing his muscles off to the world?

And rubbing them in Phil’s new boyfriend’s face?

Well aware that he was probably glowering, Dan tuned back into the conversation just in time to hear Oliver telling Phil he looked good tonight.

“I’ll be off at one if you’re free tonight,” the bouncer said as he brushed his hand over Phil’s forearm and offered him a saucy wink. Goddamn, Dan was well familiar with that move, and he wasn’t particularly enjoying watching some random bloke pull it on his boyfriend.

The bouncer’s gaze finally drifted away from Phil, landing on Dan for the first time. Understanding seemed to register in his eyes and his hand dropped. “Although, I’m now realizing that might not be an option anymore…” he added, trailing off.

“Oh, uh,” Phil stuttered, sounding strangled and surprised. His hand reached out and wrapped around Dan’s waist. “Yeah. I mean, no! Not’n option, sorry. This is my boyfriend, Dan.”

“Ah, that’s too bad,” Oliver frowned, disappointed, before offering Dan a cheeky smirk. "You’re lucky. From what I remember your boyfriend sure can ride. He's quite the power bottom, in’it he?"

Dan could feel all the color draining out of his face, could feel how tense his entire body was, could feel his nails digging into the palms of his hands. He was practically shaking — with what, he wasn’t sure. Phil said he’d slept with this guy a year ago. It wasn’t like Dan really had the right to be mad or jealous — they hadn’t even met yet.

But still.

Riding was Dan’s favorite position — he wasn’t keen on imagining Phil doing that with some other guy.

“We’re going in now,” Phil said tersely. “You sure you don’t need a cover?” he added with minimal politeness, cutting in before Dan could say anything. Not that Dan had any idea what he’d say in a moment like this. He reckoned it’d probably start with a choice four letter word, though.

“Nah of course not, it’s always free for you gorgeous,” Oliver replied flirtily, and had the nerve to fucking wink at Phil, even after it became clear Phil was taken. “Feel free to call if you’re ever around again!” His gaze shifted to Dan, dragging over his comparatively lanky body. Dan couldn’t help self consciously adjusting the jacket in front of him, squirming under the lewd scrutiny of this built bouncer. “Or are looking for a third,” Oliver added, this time winking at Dan and deliberately licking his lips.

“He won’t be,” Dan snapped, grabbing Phil’s hand tightly and pulling him into the club as soon as they had permission.

Phil followed willingly, not even attempting to pause and apologize to the guy about Dan’s rude behavior. Not that Dan thought his reaction was unjustified — the asshole had ignored Dan, hit on his boyfriend, and asked for a threesome, all within a five minute window.

Inside, Dan paused for a fraction of a second to appraise his surroundings. The club was dim in a seductive, anonymous way. There were guys everywhere, far more than the lineless entrance had suggested. A long bar lined the back wall, and sofas and low tables created narrow aisles, leaving no room for a dance floor — something that was both surprising and disappointing. Dancing would have been an easy way for Dan to release some of his pent up emotions.

Scanning the room for alternate options, Dan’s eyes caught on a deserted hallway. He pulled Phil down it, not stopping until they were passed the glowing coat check window and as far from the crowd as they could be. Dan’s grip was probably still a little too tight on Phil’s hand, but Phil didn’t complain and didn’t question.

As soon as Dan thought they were alone enough, he spun around on his heel, grabbing Phil by the waist and crowding him up against the wall in one smooth motion. Phil’s jacket fell carelessly from Dan’s grip to the floor as Dan planted his feet on either side of Phil’s, his chest and hips pressed in close.

The position left Phil pinned to the wall, and given the unspoken dynamic that they were both exploring, Dan half expected Phil to flip their positions, to switch places so that Phil was the one pinning Dan to the wall.

Much to Dan’s satisfaction, however, Phil’s only movement was to loop his arms around Dan and pull him closer, hands splayed on Dan’s lower back. That prick outside had gotten under Dan’s skin, and he needed to remind himself that Phil wasn’t with that arse. Dan needed to remember that after months of pining and lusting and yearning, Phil was finally with him and no one else.

“Mine,” Dan growled as he surged forward and captured Phil’s lips with his own. Phil chuckled softly into the kiss, his chest rumbling against Dan’s. Dan could feel Phil’s fingers tracing across his back, could feel Phil’s lips quirking up into a smile. The whole thing reeked of fond and cute, but Dan didn’t want fond and cute right now.

He wanted passionate and possessive.

So Dan didn’t pause, didn’t pull back to let Phil laugh. If anything, he kissed harder; his lips moved urgently against Phil’s and his hands slipped up from Phil’s hips, desperately running over any part of Phil’s chest he could reach without having to step back.

Phil’s lips parted, and Dan didn’t hesitate to slip his tongue in, roughly licking the roof of Phil’s mouth. Not quite battling for dominance, but definitely not letting Dan take complete charge of the kiss either, Phil massaged Dan’s tongue with his own, his hands sliding down to firmly grab Dan’s arse.

The dark hallway, the anonymous club, the foreign city — they all felt like a shelter from the real world, and Dan let himself get lost in kissing and touching and groping. Maybe it was the champagne, or maybe it was the red-hot jealousy coursing through his veins, but Dan didn’t even really care if someone noticed them. Hell, he almost hoped that asshat of a bouncer decided to go on a loo break and saw the way Dan had Phil pushed up against the wall, the way Dan had his tongue down Phil’s throat.

Saw that Phil was Dan’s.

When kissing Phil became too much for Dan’s poor lungs to handle, he pulled back roughly only to immediately latch his lips onto Phil’s neck. Needing to feel Phil in every way he could, Dan rocked his hips forward, grinding their crotches together with a force that made them both groan.

“Mine,” Dan grumbled again, the word vibrating against Phil’s pulse point and pulling a deep moan out of him. He nipped at Phil’s neck, just hard enough for Phil to hiss and tighten his grip on Dan’s arse, his fingers deliciously digging into Dan’s cheeks. “Mine, mine, mine,” Dan repeated before licking over the red spot on Phil’s neck and sucking harshly.

“Of course,” Phil replied, his voice surprisingly full of conviction given how ragged his breath was growing. “All yours, baby.”

Dan slid his hands down Phil’s side, rucking his shirt up and grabbing at the soft, bare skin of Phil’s hips. “I don’t wanna share you with anyone,” Dan mumbled into Phil’s neck as his lips kissed and bit and sucked their way up to the sensitive spot beneath Phil’s ear.

“Good,” Phil huffed, this time his voice lower and more affected. One hand left Dan’s arse to tangle in his curls, pulling back forcefully until their gazes met. “Don’t wanna share you, either.”

Dan moaned, probably far too loudly for the coat check hallway of some club, but he couldn’t help it. He’d always preferred monogamy — for a lot of reasons. Something about monogamy with Phil, though. Fuck, it was so damn hot that Dan found himself getting even more riled up. And, sure, maybe it wasn’t an idea that would make many people horny, but it was turning Dan on — he literally didn’t think Phil could say anything sexier.

Hands groping higher up under Phil’s shirt, Dan crashed their lips together again, unable to resist the urge to grind their hips together again. His involuntary moan was drowned out by a loud wolf-whistle.

“Get some, sexy!” A deep, male voice called out, making Dan’s wandering hands come to an abrupt halt on Phil’s ribs and his breath catch in his throat.

“Fuck,” Dan muttered, tearing away from Phil’s lips and burying his face in the crook of his neck. Dan could feel his cheeks growing hot with embarrassment, could feel Phil’s husky laughter as his head tipped back and thunked against the wall.

Dan wasn’t concerned about the whistling stranger recognizing them, not in the dark shadows of a dim hallway in a fancy club. He was, however, mortified — and unexpectedly a little turned on — at being caught feverishly making out with someone in public, even if it was his boyfriend.

Phil tugged lightly on Dan’s hair, this time lacking the command from earlier, and guided Dan to look at him.

“Drinks?” Phil proposed, his voice ragged in a way that made Dan radiate with satisfaction.

“Yeah,” Dan panted in agreement. “That didn’t help my problem at all, though,” he added quietly. Rocking his hips against Phil’s, Dan let Phil feel the full hardness of his cock. Through their trousers, Dan could tell that Phil’s cock was swollen too, at least halfway, and the friction was absolutely heavenly. Dan had to bite back another moan at the relief that Phil’s hips gave.

“Grab my coat and go find us a sofa. I’ll get us drinks.” Phil’s thumb dragged back and forth, back and forth across Dan’s hip, rendering him speechless and incapable of countering with any other plan, even if a part of him did still want to at least try to pay for something tonight.

“Alright,” Dan mumbled, leaning forward to press his lips to Phil’s one more time before pulling back entirely. Bending down, Dan scooped Phil’s jacket up off the floor and slung it over his arm and in front of his crotch in what he hoped was a casual manner.

Dan let Phil lead the way down the hallway, hovering behind him and taking advantage of the extra coverage while he could. When they reached the main room, Phil gave Dan’s free hand a quick squeeze before they parted ways, Phil bee-lining for the back bar and Dan veering right to find some open seats near the edge of the room.

After a minute of winding, Dan found an empty sofa in a corner of the club. The music was quieter over here, no longer so loud that talking would be impossible. He collapsed onto the cushions and spread Phil’s jacket across his lap. The back of the sofa was low, only coming up to his mid-back — probably to stop people from getting too relaxed and not partaking in the whole club thing. Slouching down so his shoulders were supported, Dan pulled his phone out of his pocket to tell Phil where he was.

The first thing he noticed was the time — almost exactly half past eleven. His interview with Jimmy Fallon would be airing any minute now.

The second thing he noticed was about half a dozen text messages from Louise.

Before he opened her messages, Dan shot Phil a quick text, trying to describe the dark corner he was sat in. Switching over to his conversation with Louise, Dan skimmed over her messages. She’d asked how the recording had gone, what his plans were for the evening, cheekily teased that she hoped Dan wasn’t responding because he was getting laid, and promised to tweet about the show for him — bless her, she really was the best friend and manager he could hope for.

Quickly, Dan typed a quick message back, ignoring most of what she’d said and just updating her on things more generally.

Dan [11:28PM]: taping was good i’m happy with it. i’m sure you’ll see soon. phil and i are out. i’ll ring tomorrow xx

Dan was just hitting send when Phil appeared above him. He shuffled back up into a proper sitting position, tucking his phone back into his pocket. Cocking an eyebrow at Dan’s movement, Phil passed Dan a lowball of something dark and on ice.

“Just Louise,” Dan said as an answer to Phil’s silent question and took a sip of his drink. It was some kind of whiskey, something much more bitter than whatever the blue concoction Phil was holding probably was. Dan was grateful that Phil seemed to remember his drink preferences, even though they’d only ordered cocktails together a small handful of times. He didn’t think he could stomach drinking something as colorful and sugary as Phil’s. “Thanks,” Dan said with a smile and a tip of his glass in Phil’s direction.

“You’re welcome,” Phil replied, twisting slightly to face Dan as his free arm came to rest on the back of the sofa behind him. “Sorry about that, by the way.” Phil pointedly nodded his head back towards the door. “I didn’t think he’d hit on me, especially not with you there. Hell, I didn’t even know if he’d be working.”

Dan shrugged, twisting slightly so that he was facing more towards Phil than the rest of the room. “It’s’not your fault,” Dan said genuinely. “Although, you promised me he wasn’t cuter than me.” Petulantly, Dan huffed and sent a glare in the direction of the entrance.

“And?” Phil chuckled, his hand slipping from the sofa, his fingers grazing along Dan’s ribcage. Something about the way Phil was so casually sprawling across the sofa, the sheer manliness of the position, combined with the gentle drag of his fingers on Dan’s side was fucking attractive. “Tha’bloke is nowhere near as stunning as you,” Phil continued, his voice low and sincere.

Dan stuck his bottom lip out, pouting up at Phil. “Are y’kidding?” Dan whined. “He looked like me, but with actual muscles an’ not limp noodle arms.”

Phil’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. His eyes dragged over Dan, lingering on his arms, his chest. Dan squirmed under Phil’s intense gaze, and he was certain his cheeks were growing red. He slouched down again; Phil was taller than him now, and Dan had to tip his head up to look at him. From this angle, Dan had a perfect view of the red marks blossoming on Phil’s neck, and he felt pride swell deep in his stomach.

“I’ll admit I have a bit of a thing for dark hair an’ pretty eyes,” Phil conceded, a small smirk on his face and humor lacing his voice. Elbow still resting on the back of the sofa, Phil bent his arm so he could run his hand through Dan’s hair, petting sweetly. Dan couldn’t resist just slightly leaning his head back into the touch, silently encouraging Phil to continue his ministrations. Jesus christ, he loved his hair being played with, both in and out of the bedroom. “But the muscles don’t really do anything for me.” Phil shrugged casually, his eyes dropping from Dan’s again to salaciously rake over his body.

“In fact,” Phil continued, his voice suddenly lower, huskier. Sexier. “I prefer that you’re a li’le more narrow ‘n me.” The hand in Dan’s hair slid down. Phil’s fingers lightly traced down the side of Dan’s neck, making Dan’s skin feel on fire and his breath catch in his throat. Phil scooched a little more towards Dan, and the close proximity made Dan have to look up even more. “I like being able’ta wrap you up in my arms.”

Arm wrapped around Dan’s shoulder, Phil pulled him in so that Dan’s shoulder was leaning against Phil’s chest, making Dan feel tiny — and not in the bad way he had a minute ago, when he’d been comparing himself to the fit bouncer out front.

This time, Dan was less subtle about the way he settled into Phil’s embrace. He brought the leg closest to Phil up, and let his knee fall into Phil’s lap. Phil seemed to welcome the new position, his other hand shifting to rest his drink on Dan’s thigh.

In sync, they both took a sip of their cocktails, and Dan found himself completely distracted from the bitter taste as he stared heatedly into Phil’s eyes. Pointedly, Dan flicked his gaze down to Phil’s glass with a challenging spark in his eye, and tipped his own drink back further. It wasn’t until the liquid was half gone that Dan stopped. With a small smirk, Phil followed Dan’s lead, lifting his glass higher and chugging.

Dan couldn’t tear his eyes away from the way Phil’s adam’s apple bobbed as he swallowed, and god, he wanted to drag his teeth against it, nip and lick Phil’s neck, add to the marks already there. He wanted to make Phil feel good, wanted to chase the sharpness of the whiskey away with the taste of Phil’s skin.

Overcome with the need to kiss Phil right now, Dan nestled his glass by his hip and tugged on Phil’s wrist. Phil clearly got the hint, his eyes twinkling with mirth and his drink lowering to Dan’s leg.

Pulled together like unstoppable magnets, they both leaned in, their lips meeting with heady passion that was likely too much for a nightclub. Phil tasted fruity and sweet, a perfect contrast to the heavy, bitter flavor of whiskey lingering in Dan’s mouth. Their lips moved against each other, Phil’s tongue almost immediately dragging along Dan’s lower lip, practically demanding entrance. Pliant and desperate for anything Phil would give him, Dan parted his lips and let Phil in. Hot desire rushed through Dan’s veins, his arousal only growing when Phil licked behind his teeth.

Dan let himself be kissed, pushing up, up, up into Phil, chasing the overwhelming feeling of Phil. It was so much, and yet not enough.

A sharp tug of Dan’s hair forced him to tip his head back further — and jesus fuck, that was hot. The new angle gave Phil access to Dan’s neck, and his lips worked their way down from Dan’s mouth to his pulse point. Beneath Phil’s mouth, Dan could feel his blood rushing, his heart pounding, and he never wanted this moment to end. The soft scrape of Phil’s teeth on his skin drew a loud moan out of Dan and caused his muscles to go slack.

Wet, cold liquid splashed onto Dan’s thigh, and he tore himself away from Phil’s lips. He looked down, finding his glass tipped precariously to the side. Oops.

Now that their drinks were emptier and the music was louder, any hope of carrying on a proper conversation had slipped away. That was fine — they’d talked plenty at dinner, and there’d be plenty of time for talking later.

Sitting upright, Dan drained the last sips of his whiskey, motioning for Phil to do the same. There were only a few gulps left in Phil’s, and he obediently knocked it back. As soon as the drink was empty, Dan snatched the glass out of Phil’s hand and hurriedly put them both on the table. His movements were careless and clumsy, resulting in one of the glasses almost immediately tipping over and ice spilling out.

Dan ignored the mess — he didn’t particularly care about anything other than Phil right now. Dan swooped back in and pressed his lips to Phil’s, his leg shifting so that he was nearly straddling Phil. Warm, firm hands gripped Dan’s hips, lifting and pulling until Dan was fully in Phil’s lap.

“Fuck,” Dan moaned against Phil’s lips, painfully turned on by the way Phil was fucking manhandling him. Dan wanted more, needed to be closer, so he tangled his hands in Phil’s quiff, bracing his elbows against Phil’s shoulders so that he could lean up and kiss Phil harder. Phil’s hands crept under Dan’s tight jumper, and his nails dug into Dan’s waist, making Dan hyper aware of every single one of Phil’s fingers.

Phil’s touch on Dan’s bare sides was electrifying, and a surge of pleasure shot up Dan’s spine. Needing to do something with the heat that was radiating from every inch of his body, Dan found himself grinding his hips down into Phil’s.

“Yeah, baby,” Phil slurred, pulling roughly and guiding Dan to rock his hips forward again. Phil felt so fucking good beneath Dan, solid, warm, and — jesus — growing hard.

Dan’s cock had calmed down some while Phil had fetched their drinks, but the friction of Phil’s hips, the tease of Phil’s hard on, made it swell in interest again.

Tearing his lips away from Phil’s, Dan latched onto Phil’s neck and sucked hard, hard enough to surely leave another mark. Those could be tomorrow’s problem to worry about. Dan worked his way higher, leaving a trail of wet, open mouthed kisses up Phil’s neck. Phil’s fingers were digging into Dan’s hips, and it was fucking intoxicating — more so than the champagne and whiskey and whatever else they were going to drink could ever be.

“You —” Phil started, his words cut off by a loud gasp as Dan sucked on what must have been a particularly sensitive spot — Dan made a mental note, because he definitely wanted to make Phil do that again. “You look s’good like this,” Phil mumbled.

“Phhhh—” Dan moaned, unable to even get Phil’s name out. The compliment felt like a physical wave of pleasure rushing through Dan’s body, making him feel hot all over. Phil was so fucking right about that whole praise thing.

Dan caught the lobe of Phil’s ear in his mouth, letting his teeth graze over it and his tongue dart out to flick it. Pushing up just a hair, Dan slid his hands from Phil’s hair, down his neck, over his shoulders, and down to his chest. Dan couldn't resist bunching Phil’s shirt in his fists, massaging over Phil’s nipples with his thumbs.

“Good, because when we get back to the hotel room,” Dan whispered into Phil’s ear, “I wanna ride you.”

“Fuck,” Phil cursed, his hand rucking Dan’s jumper up high enough that his fingers stroked the bottom of Dan’s ribcage. “Yeah, okay.”

Surprised at how easily Phil had agreed, Dan pulled back to look him in the eyes. “Wait, really? You’re cool with that being how we fuck tonight?”

“Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan, Dan,” Phil mumbled, his hands tracing rough lines up and down the naked skin of Dan’s waist. “You have no idea how sexy you look above me. Trust me, I definitely want to see you like this, filled up with my cock.”

Dan’s cock twitched, and he had to restrain himself from rocking forward again. “Jesus, Phil,” Dan panted, his hands gripping Phil’s shoulders tightly as he tried to hold onto some grain of composure. “You can’t just say shit like that.”

“And why’s that?” Phil teased, his thumbs dragging back and forth across Dan’s ribs, the feeling absolutely heavenly. It was somehow hot and tender at the same time, and Dan wanted more more more.

“You know why, you fucking asshole,” Dan grumbled, leaning back down to kiss along Phil’s neck. Dan was beginning to accept that Phil was right, but that didn’t mean he wanted to actually admit it out loud.

“You ‘n your praise kink make this too fucking easy,” Phil murmured, half panting, half chuckling.

“Don’t take ‘vantage of me,” Dan mumbled jokingly into Phil’s neck, lightly nipping at Phil’s shoulder.

Properly laughing this time, Phil slid his hands down to Dan’s hips and used his leverage to push him back. The momentum forced Dan all the way back to Phil’s knees — something Dan was thoroughly disgruntled about. But then one of Phil’s hands left Dan’s waist and thumbed over his cheek, a soft and fond look on his face, and Dan couldn’t help but melt. He might have been horny and hot, but he was so damn enamoured that the tender gesture affected him just as much as the grinding and wandering hands had.

“If we keep down this path, I’m gonna have a hard time keeping m’hands to myself,” Phil teased, a playful smirk toying at his lips. His other hand dipped into Dan’s jeans and stroked the long, prominent bone of his hip, as if to prove his point. Fuck, just Phi’s fingers on his hip was enough to drive Dan fucking mad, he didn’t know how he was going to manage to get through the night and back to their hotel without losing control.

“How ‘bout we dance for a bit?” Phil proposed suddenly. Shocked and unable to process Phil’s suggestion, Dan snapped his head back and stared down at Phil with bleary eyes, blinking slowly. The fuck?

Dancing? Right, okay. Dan could be up for dancing. But...

Dan glanced over his shoulder at the rest of the club, confused. Just like he remembered, there wasn’t exactly room for dancing anywhere. However, Dan noticed that there were several couples that were making out, feeling each other up, grinding hips desperately together.

“Uh, where?” Dan questioned skeptically. From his quick glance around, it seemed like dancing would actually draw more attention to them than snogging in a dark corner.

“Dance floor. Downstairs,” Phil explained, his head nodding toward the opposite corner. Dan followed the direction of Phil’s nod, noticing a dimly lit staircase for the first time. Of course — a lot of clubs separated sitting areas from dancing areas, Dan’s tipsy brain had just been too out of it to process.

“Sounds good,” Dan mumbled in agreement, dipping down to kiss at Phil’s neck one more time before he had to climb out of Phil’s lap. “We should have somethin’ else t’drink first, though. I’m a rubbish dancer,” he chuckled. It wasn’t entirely true, but Phil didn’t have to know that just yet.

The excuse sounded better than I wanna be drunk and free with you. Plus, maybe Dan’s decent dancing would be a pleasant surprise later.

Phil’s hand slipped out from Dan’s shirt, and ran up his chest. “How ‘bout you take our jackets to the coat check an’ I’ll order us something else t’drink, baby?” Phil suggested, his tone not really leaving room for Dan to argue as his hands dipped under Dan’s leather jacket, carefully shrugging it off his shoulders.

Dan’s jacket caught around his biceps, hanging from his arms in the gayest of fashions and he loved it. He wiggled his knees backwards until he was hovering above Phil’s hips and could easily rest his feet on the floor.

“Alright, let’s go then,” Dan agreed, backing off Phil entirely and holding one hand out to help him off the sofa. Dan was excited to dance, it would give him something a little less slutty to do with all his energy. Grabbing Phil’s jacket, Dan nodded once at Phil before heading back down the deserted hallway from earlier — only now it wasn’t as deserted. Dan passed three couples heatedly kissing before he even got to the coat check booth. But then again, surely snogging in public wasn’t that slutty if this many people were doing it.

Smiling at the employee, Dan dropped Phil’s denim jacket onto the small ledge and shrugged out of his own leather one, not bothering to tuck his phone into his pants pocket before he handed it to the guy across the bar. Tonight was about letting go, and the only person who could really need him had Phil’s number now.

Dan took the coat-check number from the worker, tucking it into his back pocket, and made his way back to the bar. Phil was standing at the far end, twisted around and watching for Dan.

And fuck, he looked good. Sometime while Dan had been gone, Phil had loosened up a little bit. The top four buttons of his shirt were undone, and his sleeves were rolled up past his elbows, and god help Dan because he was pretty sure he was about to come in his fucking pants. Phil looked so goddamn seductive leaning back against the bar like that, his shirt dipping down, his chest peeking out, his forearms taut.

Phil was gorgeous and sexy and so entirely manly — Dan couldn’t get enough.

It wasn’t until he was standing directly in front of Phil that Dan realized that there were no cocktails — no, instead there were two double shots in front of Phil, plus a small plate of lime wedges and a salt shaker. Tequila, then.

“Get ov’r here, mister,” Phil demanded, a smile on his face as he made grabby hands for Dan. Fucking hell, it should be illegal for someone to be so sexy and so cute at the same time. Dan could only handle so much, and his cock and his heart were competing for blood at this point. “I ordered us shots.”

“Shots, huh?” Dan teased, one hand coming to rest on the bar on the outside of Phil’s hip. “A simple drink wasn’t good enough for you, then?”

“I figured neither of us could manage a drink an’ dancing a’the same time.” Phil shrugged with a smile, turning back toward the bar and letting his arse grind into Dan’s hips as he pulled their shots closer to them.

Fuck. Phil really knew how to play Dan.

“Come here,” Phil murmured as he twisted back around, his hands landing on Dan’s hips. In one smooth movement, Phil spun them around and switched their positions. Before Dan could fully process the change, his waist was pressing into the bar and Phil’s crotch was digging into his arse. “Take a shot with me.”

Phil’s voice was deep and gruff, and the scratchiness of it made Dan’s stomach flip over and over in desire. He bloody adored how Phil was taking care of him tonight, somehow perfectly in charge of all of Dan’s needs, intuitively aware of what Dan would find the sexiest and most fun at any given moment.

Dan reached for a tequila shot with one hand, his other grabbing a lime. Realizing his mistake — it was salt, tequila, lime, after all — Dan dropped his lime in favor of reaching for the salt shaker. Phil beat him to it, though, licking a long stripe up his own hand and shaking two small mounds of salt along the line.

“Here,” Phil murmured into Dan’s ear, bringing his hand level with Dan’s mouth.

Not hesitating to check their surroundings or respond, Dan surged forward and sucked the salt off Phil’s hand. Phil moved quickly, his head dipping forward and licking his hand at the same time as Dan, their cheeks pressing together. Simultaneously, they both lifted their shots to their mouths, tipping the tequila down their throat. Behind him, Dan could feel Phil gulp, could feel his neck and his chest and his stomach move as he swallowed the alcohol.

Phil got to the lime first, holding it in front of Dan’s lips. Leaning forward, Dan sucked the lime into his mouth, taking care to drag his lips along Phil’s fingers as well. Soft vibrations rumbled against Dan’s back, and it took his drunken brain a second to realize that they were from Phil moaning.

Phil dropped the lime to the bar and reached for the other wedge, but Dan knocked his hand out of the way. It was his turn.

Grabbing the second wedge, Dan spun around to face Phil. Dan tried his intoxicated best to arrange his face into a seductive look as he held the wedge up to Phil’s mouth and nudged it against his lips. Maybe it was successful, because Dan glanced up at Phil’s eyes and saw that his pupils were wide and dark. He looked hungry, Dan thought, but it wasn’t for the lime.

Regardless, Phil parted his lips and sucked on it, pulling the tips of Dan’s fingers into the wet heat of his mouth, too.

Fucking hell, no wonder Phil had moaned when Dan had done that. Now that Dan’s fingers were in Phil’s mouth, now that Phil’s tongue was licking along his skin, Dan couldn’t help but imagine something else in Phil’s mouth, and — fuck.

Pulling back off the wedge with a loud pop, Phil smirked at Dan, linking their hands together under the bar. “Let’s go dance.”

“Yeah,” Dan agreed, breathless, carelessly dropping the lime back to the plate and letting Phil tug him along. Together, they weaved through the aisles of sofas to the steep staircase leading to the mystery basement.

When they reached the stairs, Phil dropped Dan’s hand, opting to grab the handrail instead. Rightfully so, too. The steps were steep and winding, and Dan was sure that even Sober Him would struggle. Dan followed, holding tight to the railing and sticking close to Phil.

Less than halfway down, the twisting was already fucking with Dan’s drunken head, nearly making him stumble and fall. Luckily, the staircase was narrow and Phil was directly in front of him, so Dan was able to catch himself before he tumbled out of control.

After what seemed like forever, they rounded the last twist and the stairs opened up to a packed dance floor. The music was a million times louder down here, the lights flashing and moving, subtle fog machines trying to make the whole place scream sexy. Everywhere Dan looked, there were men dancing, grinding, kissing. It was the kind of place he hadn’t gotten to indulge in since his late teens, and he was suddenly incredibly eager to embrace the atmosphere.

Stepping around Phil, Dan grabbed Phil by the hand and drug him out to the dance floor. They weaved passed couple after couple until they were packed into the middle of the crowd, disappearing into plain sight thanks to the drunk dancers surrounding them.

Dan spun around to face Phil, alcohol causing the world to blur around the edges. It took a second for Dan’s eyes to focus again, and when they did, he realized that Phil was blatantly checking him out. The way Phil was looking at him, with wide pupils and parted lips, made Dan feel like the sexiest guy in the room — maybe even in all of New York.

“C’mere,” Phil demanded, nearly shouting to be heard over the music. His message was clear though; there was no mistaking what Phil wanted when he grabbed Dan’s hips and pulled him in close. Dan stumbled forward willingly, and he had a feeling he’d walk straight across the threshold to hell if Phil guided him. On instinct, Dan wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck; they were close — so, so close. Their chests were just centimeters apart, their hands spread wide like they were trying to touch as much of each other as they could. Together, they started to move in time to the thumping bass of the music.

Dan giggled, drunk and horny and maybe just a little bit slap-happy.

What? Phil mouthed with furrowed brows and an amused smile.

Dan smiled and stepped closer so he could try to explain; their chests were touching now and Dan could feel Phil dancing. Dan leaned in so that he could yell directly into Phil’s ear. “I feel like I’m back at my year eight dance.” Dan tugged on the hair at the nape of Phil’s neck and pointedly wiggled his hips, hoping Phil would telepathically understand Dan’s logic.

Phil laughed, loud and shameless, with his tongue poking out and his eyes nearly closed. He looked happy and gorgeous and Dan’s heart was beating in a way that he was pretty sure had nothing to do with the minute amount of physical exercise.

Smile still plastered on his face, Phil pulled Dan impossibly closer, causing their hips to crash together, and god Dan loved how their hips felt when they were pressed together. He could have sworn he could feel the outline of Phil’s cock, and it only made him more excited for later.

“Only if you got kicked out,” Phil teased, his hands dropping down to Dan’s arse and squeezing, as if to prove his point. And yeah, that move was definitely forbidden back in year eight. Maybe it was a good thing too, because thirteen-year-old Dan might’ve fucking cum in his pants if someone did that to him then. Fucking hell, twenty-three-year-old Dan was on the verge of doing so, maybe the club should be a little more regulated.

Maybe a touch too late, Dan vehemently shook his head — grinding at dances wasn’t even remotely his life at thirteen. At thirteen, Dan was sexually confused and his only quality friendship was Louise. (Although, four years later, Dan was much less confused and was actively looking for just about anyone who would pop his cherry.)

Now, though, Dan was entirely comfortable with his sexual preferences, even if he did waiver between labels from time to time. At the very least, Dan could say with complete confidence that he was fucking attracted to the man in front of him, and he was fucking hot for the fact that they were surrounded by other gay couples.

And now that Phil’s hands were on his arse, pulling him closer so that their hips, their cocks, rubbed together, Dan couldn’t think about anything else.

So Dan let go. He let the champagne and the whiskey and the tequila take over, let his inhibitions fade away. The music was so loud that Dan could feel it in his soul, the remixed-nineties music just familiar enough to make Dan feel like he knew what he was doing, the added beats just fast enough to make him feel sexy. Hands still tangled around Phil’s neck, Dan pushed his hips forward and rocked them against Phi’s.

His hips moved on their own accord, swaying and grinding and moving in time with the music. Phil moved with him, their crotches rubbing together over and over as remixed versions of TLC, Christina Aguilera, and Destiny’s Child pulsed around them. It was hot, god it was hot. The dance floor was so packed, so anonymous, and Dan couldn’t hold back from closing the fucking microscopic amount of distance between them, kissing Phil over and over again as the night grew later and later.

At some point, Phil twisted Dan around. It came almost out of nowhere — one minute they were grinding together, and the next, Phil was manhandling Dan, shifting their positions so that Phil’s semi-hard cock was rubbing against Dan’s arse, and fucking hell that was hot. Some bassed-up version of Baby Got Back was playing, so loud that the song was almost all-consuming. The sober recesses of Dan’s mind tried to remind him of that scene from Friends, the one where Ross and Rachel sang this to their infant and offended each other, but the drunk and horny parts of Dan were far too focused on the way Phil was grinding into his arse, the way Phil’s hands were sliding further and further down his hips, to properly process anything about the music. Phil rubbed his hands over and over the front of Dan’s hips, pulling him closer and grazing his cock with every pass. Moaning, Dan let his head fall back onto Phil’s shoulder, and Phil’s neck was right there, so of course Dan mouthed along it. The music was too loud to hear much of anything over it, but Dan could feel Phil’s throat vibrate with a moan, could feel Phil’s fingers dig into his hips the slightest bit harder. They were touching everywhere, flushed together from head to toe and Phil felt like Dan’s whole world tonight.

Dan rocked his hips back, soaking up the heady sensation of Phil’s cock rubbing against him, feeling more and more intoxicated off lust than alcohol by the second. Trying not to overthink it, Dan reached behind himself and wrapped his arm around Phil’s neck, his fingers tangling in the short hair at the back of Phil’s head.

The breath was nearly knocked out of Dan when Phil pushed up Dan’s short shirtsleeve with his mouth, and kissed along his inner bicep as he drug his lips up Dan’s arm. Fucking hell, Dan was definitely about to combust and cum on the spot if Phil kept doing that. Phil’s lips latched onto Dan’s arm, sucking and surely leaving a mark and fuck Dan had never been so glad to have worn a short sleeve shirt as he was right now.

Once again, the music shifted, and the iconic first notes of Britney rung out. Within seconds, Dan recognized the song, and given how Phil’s fingers tightened on his hips, he reckoned Phil did, too. And god, he wanted to look at Phil while they danced to this.

Dan tried to twist around, and Phil’s grip loosened just enough to let him move, his fingers dragging deliciously over Dan’s skin as he turned. They readjusted quickly, Dan’s arms wrapping around Phil’s neck and Phil’s hands lowering to grope Dan’s arse.

“Baby, can’t you see,” Dan murmured huskily into Phil’s ear, his tongue darting out to lick Phil’s earlobe. Slowly, sensually, Dan slipped his arms from Phil’s neck and dragged his hands across Phil’s chest. He moved slowly, his fingernails raking across Phil’s shirt, pausing to rub at Phil’s nipples.

“Jesus, babe,” Phil mumbled, the words barely more than a strangled groan. The fingers on Dan’s arse tightened, forcefully pulling until Dan’s hips were grinding against Phil’s. Their cocks rubbed together, and Dan rocked his hips again, desperate to feel and feel and feel.

Phil was half hard, and so was Dan, and the friction was amazing. Pleasure shot through Dan, his cock twitching and a quiet moan tumbling from his lips. Dan couldn’t resist tangling his fingers in Phil’s hair, dragging him just the slightest bit closer, not that there was really much distance left between them.

The music continued to pound around them, and Dan continued to rock his hips forward in time with the beat. He wanted so much, and the grinding was just a small tease. Through the fabric, Dan could feel Phil growing harder and harder, making Dan want more. Heat and desire and lust were building in the pit of Dan’s stomach, and he just fucking wanted.

He wanted to taste Phil’s cock in his mouth. He wanted to feel Phil’s bare cock throbbing against his own. He wanted to be stretched around Phil, full and satisfied.

This song — this song out of all the late-nineties and early-two-thousands songs — fucking got to Dan. And he didn’t think it was fully his fault, it wasn’t like he had a thing for it three months ago. But then, one of the earliest videos he’d watched on AmazingPhil was Phil dancing half naked to this song — there was really no coming back from that.

Dan kissed up Phil’s neck, coming to a stop just a short centimeter from Phil’s ear. “Ya know,” he started huskily. He could feel Phil’s fingers dig into his arse, could see how Phil’s breath hitched. Mischievously, Dan continued, “I jacked off to this video.”

The effect was immediate — Phil froze and inhaled so sharply that Dan could actually hear the gasp over the music. For a second, the world was frozen; it was just Dan staring at Phil, a smug smirk on his face, and Phil staring back, shocked and wide-eyed.

And then Phil’s lips crashed onto Dan’s, moving insistently, hotly, and the world was moving again.

The kiss was merciless, Phil’s tongue immediately licking at Dan’s lips and demanding entrance — not that Dan was complaining. He opened his mouth and let Phil in, let Phil ravage him. Phil’s hands disappeared from Dan’s arse, only to land on his cheeks, firmly holding his head in place so Phil could kiss him harder.

There was no air in Dan’s lungs, and he didn’t give a single fuck. The shortness of breath only made everything hotter, and jesus that was a kink Dan didn’t think he had, but then again, he might find any kink hot if it was with Phil. Phil was so in control, so hungry, so domineering, and Dan couldn’t get enough of it.

Phil pulled back without warning, leaving Dan a panting mess. They were so, so close, and Phil’s eyes were nothing but black pupils. He looked ready to fucking devour Dan, and Dan really hadn’t expected this strong of a response but he was living for it. It was making him feel wanted and sexy.

“We’re going,” Phil snapped, his hands roughly unwinding Dan’s arms from his neck. “Right. Fucking. Now.”

Phil’s words were sharp, making it clear that this wasn’t a request. He sounded like he was on the verge of losing control, looked like he might shove Dan against the nearest wall, and take him right then and there.

Their fingers tangled together and Phil spun around, dragging Dan behind him as he pushed his way through the dancing crowd. It was a good thing Phil was holding Dan so tightly, because he was moving so fast that Dan might have gotten lost if their hands got separated.

Phil didn’t stop moving until they’d made it up the stairs, all the way past the sofas and down the hallway. They came to an abrupt halt in front of the coat check window and — shit, right. Their jackets.

Dan dug through his pockets, searching for the tiny ticket that he’d shoved somewhere. Phil’s heavy stare wasn’t helping, only making him feel more flustered and rushed and desperate to get the fuck out of there already.

“Dan,” Phil said, a hint of reprimand and urgency in his voice that spurred Dan to move faster. His fingers finally closed around the small slip, and he wrangled it out, holding it up triumphantly. Phil ripped the ticket out of Dan’s hand, his only response a single approving nod. Phil slammed it down on the counter, his eyes never once drifting from Dan’s.

The coat check worker chuckled — it was probably perfectly clear what was going on. But even that wasn’t enough to drag Phil’s eyes away from Dan. Dan swallowed thickly, his mouth dry, as he held Phil’s gaze. He couldn’t fucking think with Phil looking at him like that. Struck dumb, Dan licked his lips as he waited to see what would happen next.

Phil’s grip was still tight, and he tugged on Dan’s hand. Drunk and caught off guard, Dan stumbled forward, colliding with Phil.

“You’re so sexy,” Phil whispered, just barely loud enough to be heard. “I can’t wait t’fuck you.”

Dan whimpered, fucking whimpered. Phil was so much filthier than his new videos made him seem, he was dirty in all the right ways. Although, looking back, Dan could see some of this Phil in the much younger Phil that had filmed the Toxic video.

The rustling of their jackets hitting the counter jolted Dan and Phil out of their bubble. Both of their heads snapped to face the window, and Dan could tell his cheeks were probably flushed red. He’d forgotten that there was someone else nearby, that someone else was probably paying proper attention to them.

Phil reached out to pull the bundle of clothes closer, clearly avoiding looking at the coat check person. “Put this on s’we can leave,” Phil ordered, shoving Dan’s leather jacket into his chest.

Dan didn’t need telling twice; he sprung into action and clumsily shrugged into his jacket, his hands getting caught several times. At this point, he wasn’t sure if it was thanks to the alcohol or lust, but he didn’t care.

Phil slapped a few bills on the counter and grabbed his own coat.

“Thanks boys,” the clerk said cheerfully. “Have a good night! Don’t forget protection!”

Oh god. Dan felt his cheeks grow hot. He didn’t mind people noticing him and Phil were itching to fuck, but christ, he really didn’t expect a random stranger to actually say it.

Phil grumbled something in response, something Dan didn’t quite hear or process, and guided Dan back down the hallway, one hand firmly pressed against Dan’s lower back.

Hot breath washed over Dan’s ear, and he belatedly realized that Phil was close. “I really don’t wanna use a condom,” Phil muttered into his ear. Dan’s breath hitched, and Phil’s fingers curled around to his sides, not giving him a chance to recover before continuing. “Wanna feel you ‘n fill you up.”

“Fuck,” Dan huffed, his mind not able to think about anything other than Phil’s bare cock pressed into him, pumping cum deep into his arse. “Yeah, please. ‘M clean.”

“Good,” Phil said with a note of finality. He opened the club door and ushered Dan through it. Dan stopped just outside the entrance, hovering and waiting for direction from Phil. Phil stood close, head bowed as he tapped on his phone. Dan looked around them, realizing that there was a line now, and the asshole bouncer from earlier was gone. Must have been after one, then.

“Ugh,” Phil groaned. “There’s a twen’y minute wait for’n uber.”

God that was so much longer than Dan wanted to wait. Brows furrowed, Dan glanced up at the street sign.

“We’re only like seven blocks from the hotel, w’can walk faster,” Dan pointed out.

“How’dya know that?” Phil asked, head snapping up, looking surprised.

Dan pointed to the numbered street sign. “Grid system. Let’s go,” Dan suggested, nodding his head in the right direction.

“Perfect,” Phil mumbled. He grabbed Dan’s hand and started walking. His pace wasn’t quite as fast as earlier, something Dan was rather grateful for. He didn’t think he could walk that quickly for seven blocks and not be too out of breath for sex.

The first block, Phil was still walking faster than normal, though. It wasn’t until they reached the first crosswalk and were forced to stop that they both breathed. The break calmed some of the out-of-control desire coursing through Dan’s veins, dulling it down to a pulsing lust. Dan turned to look at Phil, his eyes surely full of fond desire, a smile definitely pulling at his lips.

Phil bounced on his toes for a second, his movements slowing down when the light didn’t immediately change. Phil glanced at Dan, his heady expression melting slightly into something a bit softer, a bit more gentle. The passion and want were still there, but now there was something else, something sweeter, there too.

Now that they were out of the club, free from the throbbing bass of the music and away from the grinding couples, Dan’s mind felt a little clearer. It was chilly out, not quite cold but definitely cool enough that Dan felt justified leaning into Phil a bit, resting his head on Phil’s shoulder and sticking close. Phil smiled down at him fondly as Dan looked up at him through his lashes. The world around seemed to fade away, and there were butterflies fluttering in Dan’s stomach and god how was Phil so sexy and dominate and sweet all in the span of five minutes, this had to be illegal.

Dan’s eyes snapped away when the crosswalk chimed, and suddenly they were walking again. They weren’t the only ones out — if anything, there seemed to be more people on the streets now. As they made their way back to their hotel, they passed club after club, bar after bar, all with lines of drunk twenty-somethings.

Some sober, less reckless part of Dan warned him that all the people meant a higher chance of getting recognized, but he just didn’t care. He wasn’t about to stop and talk to a fan right now. It was Friday night, and the whole city seemed to be intoxicated, and Dan would just have to hope that everyone else was too drunk to notice him.

They came to stop at another intersection, just barely missing the chance to cross. Dan glanced around, taking in the city surrounding them. There was a group of girls nearby, smoking and drinking something out of brown paper bags. There were a few people outside a pizza place, drunkenly eating slices of pizza off white paper plates as they sat on the curb. There was a couple across the way, fighting loudly about something Dan couldn’t make out.

It was late and crowded and everyone was too focused on themselves to take note of anyone else. It was the kind of crowd that made everyone anonymous. The neon city lights were blurry, and made it hard to see the details of anything — although maybe that part was just Dan.

Regardless, he didn't care.

Phil was so close, so warm by Dan’s side and Dan just wanted more.

“Kiss me,” Dan asked, nearly begged, as he looked back at Phil. His voice was high and nearly breathless, so affected that he probably would have been embarrassed by how fucking needy he sounded if the situation had been different. But as it was, this was Phil, Phil who seemed to instinctively understand every single desire Dan had.

Phil smiled at Dan softly, turning so they were face to face. Without hesitation, Phil closed the distance between them, doing as Dan asked. Phil kissed him slowly but thoroughly, his lips moving languidly, his tongue slipping between Dan’s teeth and licking along the roof of his mouth.

“Mmm,” Dan hummed into Phil’s mouth as he wrapped his arms around Phil’s neck, his elbows resting on Phil’s shoulders, wrists crossed behind his head.

Phil’s lips twitched into the ghost of a smile, but he kept kissing, his arms wrapping around Dan’s waist and pulling him closer.

It was hot — kissing Phil would always be hot — but it was also sweet and maybe even a little romantic. Dan had never kissed someone on the street until Isabella, and in hindsight, everything about those kisses had been for the wrong reasons. This kiss, right now with Phil, wasn’t for pizza eaters or smokers or fighters. This kiss had nothing to do with the audience, and everything to do with the fact that Dan was so fucking head over heels for Phil that Dan couldn’t couldn’t resist kissing him for the two minutes it took for the crosswalk light to change.

At some point, Louise had told him that all of this was so much better when you loved someone, and Dan was realizing how right she was because just kissing had never been this good.

Love.

The word crashed over Dan, suddenly the only thing he could think as he drunkenly kissed his boyfriend in the middle of New York City at two in the morning.

Dan loved Phil.

Dan was one hundred percent, completely and totally in love with the boy kissing him.

Gasping, Dan pulled back from the kiss, his eyes flying open.

“What?” Phil asked breathlessly, a note of urgency in his voice.

“I — nothing.” Dan swallowed thickly, there was no way he could say what he was thinking. Not now, not already. His gaze drifted over Phil’s shoulder and caught on the signal, which was now showing a white walking man. “We can cross now.”

Dan hoped his voice was steady, hoped it wasn’t obvious that his mind was somewhere, but he was pretty sure he wasn’t very subtle. If Phil noticed, though, he didn’t say anything. He just followed Dan into the street, one arm still wrapped around his waist, holding Dan close as they continued walking. Dan leaned into Phil’s side, stumbling slightly and focusing entirely too much on the way Phil’s fingers had dipped under his shirt and were thumbing over his side, and not nearly enough of the sidewalk.

Yeah, Dan was definitely in love with him.

[leoninapelliolovesconchitawurst]

ENGLISH TRANSLATION ( Jeannette Nobbe)

VOLSKRANT.NL 31/01/20

by Mennon Pot

https://www.volkskrant.nl/cultuur-media/conchita-wurst-sorry-dat-ik-zo-n-wandelend-cliche-ben~b0477817/

(Conchita) Wurst: 'I'm sorry I'm a walking cliché'.

Above all we know Conchita Wurst as the bearded 'female 'singer who won the ESC in 2014. But we've moved on and are a bit wiser. It´s just Wurst now, but the beard is still there.

With light feathered steps, Thomas Neuwirth (31) enters the conference room of the hotel in Groningen where he is staying: black combat boots, black leather pants, tight black T-shirt, the black beard and the perfect short trimmed jet black hair..

He introduces himself as Tom. It's not difficult to recognise the bearded drag queen Conchita in him. (Kopenhagen, 2014, remember?) but the dress and wig are stowed away for a while. Conchita has a sort of sabbatical, so to speak.

Neuwirth is on tour as a man. Stage name: Wurst. Yesterday evening he performed in Groningen; the next concert will be 7 february at the Melkweg in Amsterdam. His new album 'Truth over Magnitude' also carries the artist´s name Wurst.

Let's get this straight: when the subject is Conchita Wurst, the word 'transgender' sometimes comes a long. Wrongly. Neuwirth is a man, ('but incredibly gay, of course'), who has a choice from now on: being on tour as a drag queen (Conchita) or as a man (Wurst) .

´a lot of fun, being a masculine stage persona', he says. Conchita will turn up again somewhere else.

Holland appreciated Conchita's 'Rise like a Phoenix' with the highest score, almost 6 years ago.

Neuwirth didn't forget: twelve points, douze points from Holland for the bearded diva from Austria.

Then hectic years followed. 'After the Song Contest I thought, I have to make the most of it now, build my fame and cash it in. So I surrounded myself with all kinds of experts, managers, stylists, make/up artists, the whole circus. After 3 years I was exhausted. I couldn´t do it anymore. I told my audience every nigh, be yourself, believe in yourself. But along the way, I forgot myself.´

He got rid of the experts’ circus and is having a relaxed tour now, with a small entourage. He feels good again, although in 2018 he had to announce he is infected with the HIV virus. His manager politely asks, almost in an humble manner, not to talk about that.

Tom doesn´t appear to be very worried about that. There has seldom been a star who starts an interview so cheerfully. ´A great photo shoot and after that talk about things I find beautiful and fun.

Terrific, I was already looking forward to it when I came out of bed.´

´Curriculum Vitae'

1988 – Born as Thomas Neuwirth in Gmunden, Austria

2007 – Candidate at the talentshow Starmania, and boyband Jetzt anders!

2011 – Debut as female persona Conchita Wurst, the debut single `I´ll be there´

2012 - Second place at the Austrian Songfestival

2014 – ESC winner with ´Rise like a Phoenix

2015 – First album ´Conchita´, co-presenter ESC

2018 – Second album ´From Vienna with Love´

2019 – Debut as male stage persona ´Wurst´, third album ´Truth over Magnitude´

2020 – Wurst ´Trust over Magnitude´ Sony Music

Wurst will be performing in the Melkweg in Amsterdam on February 7

SOUNDTRACK

Music from the Motion Picture Titanic ...1997

´My first CD. I was 9 years old when I bought it. `My heart will go on´’changed my life´. As it were, Céline Dion gave me permission to be utterly dramatic and to be over the top. When I came out of the closet, I heard that song in my head.

It was also a liberation for me as a singer. My mom always sang with a thin, high falsetto voice. I thought that was how it should be. Dion taught me, you may yell as hard as you can, with all the power you have in you. When you sing so loud, you can’t fake it. The sound you push out of your body, is the sound of your body, unique and by definition authentic. Céline Dion taught me that singing is something really physical.´

SERIES

The Crown ..Netflix..., 2016 until 2019

´For me it´s getting difficult to watch a movie to the end. I guess that´s because of all the series on Netflix and HBO. My favorite is `The Crown´.. ´the intro alone is so beautiful, that liquid gold that forms a crown, such art. I used to watch it twice. Ít says something about the fact that I can´t choose between the two women who play Elizabeth and the two men who play prince Philip. All the actors are great. The costumes, the stories, the palaces, it´s so delightful. The history also intrigues me, after every episode I checked on Wikipedia if it was really what had happened.

PARTIES

´At Christmas I always come back to Vienna. I love the lights, glitters and decorations, my inner Mariah Carey is looking forward to it every year. Christmas 2019 was extra special because it had been a long time since the whole family came together at my grandmother´s house.´

I would love it to be like that every year... A couple of days being together in one home. Talking, getting to really know my family. Maybe now you think, days on and on with uncles and aunts, such horror! It is easy to say that I don´t really have much in common with these people. But I do, Really. They all have a story and similarities with your stories. Ask them about your life and tell them about yours.´

That´s what Christmas is all about to me. To me, the birth of Jesus has not that much to do with it.´

ISLAND..

I have an agreement with my best friends to go on vacation at least once every two years. We have been to Mykonos a couple of times, THE especially gay island. I´m sorry I sound like a walking cliché.´

The sun, the sea, the beaches, the small streets, so cosy. We rent a house with a pool and for a week or two we live in our own little paradise, actually being a bit tipsy the whole time. Go shopping and cook.´

`What´s also very important, on Mykomos, the wind is always blowing the right way. I love to watch the women, because their dresses and their hair flutter so beautifully.´

STYLE ICON

Victoria Beckham

I was and still am a big Spice Girls fan and I especially admire Victoria Beckham, because she lives her life the way she wants. She appears in tabloids every day, but has survived a crisis in her relationship and has stayed happy with the love of her life and her family. I think that it´s really strong.´

In regard to her style, she can go from very classy to very trashy, I like that. One day she´s wearing a designer dress, the next she and David Beckham are walking in identical jogging suits. She couldn’t care less. I think that it´s inspiring.´

´I think she is utterly authentic, raging through the glamour. Although I have never met her, I´m sure that I could have a lot of fun with her. I´d love to drink some tequila with her for an afternoon or so.´

AGE

30

´I thought becoming 30 was really special, I lost my wild behaviour, came to be more restful. Some way or another I think a lot about some things my mother said: in my twenties, I ignored those lessons, but now I´m 30, I suddenly realised she was right for example how important family and friends are.

I´m 31 now, I have inner peace and my life in order, but I still feel young. I´m convinced that this the best period of my life´. My advise to everybody... be 30.´

ALBUM

Recomposed by Max Richter / The Four Seasons ..2012

I don´t play any instruments and until not too long ago, I didn´t really know much about music. I really found that a pity sometimes. Fortunately, my good friend Martin studies at the School of Musical Arts... !! He´s studying the history of music intensely and tells me about a lot of great composers. I learn a lot from that.´´I never understood classical music and didn´t really know anything about it, but thanks to the listening sessions with Martin I fell in love with Vivaldi..

The pop artist of the classical artists.

´Max Richter interpreted Vivaldi´s Four Seasons and composed it in a modern fashion. It´s a modern, post minimalistic piece, completely different from the original one, but you still recognise it. Greatly done, at the moment it´s my favorite album.´

BOOK

Friedrich Schiller « Ueber die aesthetische Erziehung des Menschen ». About the aesthetic upbringing of the people..´

´A good friend advised me to read the philosophical letters from Friedrich Schiller ..Letters, 1794-1795)

That´s a hard job to do. Because of the old fashioned German I had to read some sentences 5 times. You always have to wrestle yourself through a thick layer of 18th century sexism.

´But further on you´ll find something beautiful. Schiller writes a lot about finding your inner beauty and your own truth. Dare to be yourself. Embrace your darker sides. Those are important as well.´

´At the same time he preaches self-perspective.. don´t take yourself too seriously, you´re not the center of the universe. That is very worthy to me. Namely because I DO think I´m the center of the universe, haha.

`Still it´s very wise of him, to send a message from 1795 to a 21st century queen with a Mariah Carey complex.´

CLUB

Circus in Vienna

´The Arena is a huge complex in Vienna, a concert building with a mega discotheque. A couple of times a year they organize Circus, my favorite gay club night. I always go there with my group of closest friends, but it´s actually a bit of a rule that we lose each other and disappear into the crowd.´

´I roam around all night- Every room, every floor has its own musical theme and decoration. I love the types of people I meet there, their clothes, their fetishisms, everything.´

….Arena Vienna, Baumgasse 80, Vienna

CITY

Amsterdam

´I live in Vienna, I love Vienna and I will always come back there, but the greatest city I´ve been to is Amsterdam – since then I traveled all over the world so I know what I´m talking about.

´Of all the cities I visited, Amsterdam is the only one where I would want to live a period of time. So that´s what I´m gonna do, this summer, for a few months to begin with.´

´I can see that Amsterdam also has the flagship stores from all known store chains. And a lot of tourists, like every special city. But I see all these small jewelry shops where they sell their self-made jewelry. Little bakeries. Cosy streets. And a lot of water. I love water. I love cities with lots of water.´

[leontincs]

･:*:･ﾟ☆  jessica chastain. forty six. cisfemale. she/her   ↷   léonie winters  has  been  spotted  by  the  paparazzi  in  los  angeles.  they  are  an  a-list celebrity  known  for  their  career  as  an  actress.  they’re  known  by  their  fans  to  be  industrious, meticulous, and philanthropic  but  the  tabloids  frequently  portray  them  to  be  anomalous, cynical, & unorthodox.  i  wish  them  every  success  in  the  entertainment  industry. ･:*:･ﾟ☆

          hola  everyone  ,  my  name’s  frankie  (  she / her  )  and  i’m  a  twenty - two  year  old  living  in  the  good  ol’  state  of  texas  (  cst  )  ,  and  i’m  so  excited  that  fameshq  is  back  !  if  you  were  previously  in  the  rp  and  remember  mariëlla * ,  bless  your  soul  but  i  present  to  you  miss  LÉONIE  WINTERS.  i  decided  to  start  afresh  with  the  rp  back  ,  so  please  bear  with  me.  PLEASE  NOTE  :  if  you’d  like  me  to  fill  out  a  wanted  connection  of  yours  ,  don’t  be  afraid  to  hmu  either !  thank  you  for  taking  a  moment  out  of  your  time  in  reading  this  lame  intro.  i  love  you.  i’m  being  serious  though.

*  loosely  based  off  of  an  old  muse  of  mine  ,  which  is  irrelevant.

before  i  forget  ,  please  click  on  the  lovely  heart  so  it  magically  turns  to  its  natural  color  if  you’d  like  to  plot.  if  not  ,  i  won’t.  just  kidding.  i’m  going  to  disappear  after  posting  this  ,  but  i’ll  definitely  be  around  before  we  open  and  hopefully  with  no  interruptions.  fingers  crossed.

━━━━━     quick  facts  /  basic  information  .

birth name:  léontine  thirza  cruyssen  viscaal .

stage name:  léonie  “  lay-OH-nee  ”  winters .

nickname(s):  if  you  can  come  up  with  one  ,  you’re  a  genius  but  perhaps  leo .

age:  forty - six    [    46    years    old    ]

date of birth:  november  25th  ,  1972 .

place of birth:  amsterdam  ,  netherlands .

romantic / sexual orientation:  panromantic  +  demisexual .

gender + species:  cisgender  female  +  human.

hometown:  new  york  city  ,  new  york .

education:  some  high  school  in  ny  ,  nyu  tisch  school  of  the  arts.

languages:  english  ,  dutch  ,  and  spanish .

nationality:  dutch  ,  american .

ethnicity:  caucasian  (  european  ) .

religion:  non - practicing  christian  /  roman  catholic .

drinks, smokes & drugs:  yes  /  yes  /  no .

current location:  los  angeles  ,  california .

occupation:  actress  /  executive  producer  /  wannabe  director  /  writer .

━━━━━     personality  .

zodiac sign:  sagittarius .

mbti:  esfp .

likes:  matcha  tea  ,  peanut  butter  ,  volunteering  ,  traveling  ,  +  writing .

dislikes:  coffee  ,  mint  chocolate  ,  traffic  ,  reckless  drivers  ,  +  hospitals .

bad habits:  smoking  ,  procrastinating  ,  perfectionism  ,  +  swearing .

secret talent:  probably  none . 

hobbies:  cooking  ,  hiking ,  writing  ,  baking  ,  +  knitting  /  crocheting .

fears:  probably  too  many  ,  as  in  a  few  ,  to  list .

five positive traits:  industrious  ,  meticulous  ,  easygoing  ,  philanthropic  +  zealous .

five negative traits:  anomalous  ,  cynical  ,  unorthodox  ,  anxious  ,  +  restless .

other mentionable details:  a  history  of  anxiety  disorder  /  panic  attacks  (  tw  )  ,  collects  movie  tickets  ,  closet  organized  by  color  ,  tba  /  etc .

━━━━━     appearance  .

tattoos:  three  tattoos  but  to  be  determined .

piercings:  one  single  piercing  on  each  earlobe .

━━━━━     family  information  .

parents’ names:  constantin  and  thea  cruyssen  (  née  viscaal  ) .

parent relationship:  healthy  ,  tight - knit .

sibling names:  tba  because  i  might  send  in  a  wc  to  the  main .

sibling relationship:  all  right  ,  all  right  ,  all  right .

other relevant relatives:  saskia  winters  /  maternal  grandmother  ,  etc .

children:  three  kids.  might  also  send  in  a  wc  to  the  main  but  i  don’t  know .

pets:  clea  the  dalmatian  ( f )  ,  electra  breed  tba  ( f )  ,  and  toby  the  tuxedo  cat  ( m ) .

━━━━━     lazily  written  biography  .

          léonie  was  born  in  the  city  of  amsterdam  in  the  early  1970′s  to  constantin  +  thea  cruyssen.  they  were  a  family  of  five.  the  cruyssens  moved  to  manhattan  when  their  kids  were  young  (  their  ages  aren’t  too  far  apart  ) .  raised  the  children  mostly  in  new  york  city.  every  summer  they’d  visit  their  extended  family  in  the  netherlands.  she  wasn’t  too  bad  of  a  student  throughout  her  scholastic  years.  she  had  a  keen  interest  in  acting  ,  but  always  had  a  great  appreciation  for  film  and  its  history  .  so  when  it  was  time  for  college  applications  ,  she  chose  tisch  school  of  the  arts  and  hoped  the  school  would  accept  her  application.  they  accepted  her  !  in  that  moment  ,  her  life’s  made  and  was  off  to  start  her  journey  as  an  ACTRESS .

          léonie  graduated  from  nyu  in  1994  for  a  bachelor’s  in  drama  and  performance  studies.  she  spent  two  years  working  as  a  waitress  in  new  york  before  having  the  desire  to  move  ,  but  she  managed  to  earn  herself  some  acting  gigs.  it  wasn’t  easy  but  she’d  have  guest  starring  &  recurring  roles  on  popular  tv  shows  such  as  law  &  order  and  nypd  blue.  basically  shows  that  were  based  in  new  york.  fast  forward  to  1996  when  she  decided  to  move  to  los  angeles  at  the  age  of  24.  when  leonie  first  moved  to  LA  ,  she  started  working  as  a  waitress  (  again  )  ,  babysitter  ,  and  a  dog  walker  so  that  she  is  able  to  afford  a  roof  over  her  head  ,  pay  the  bills  ,  and  have  food  on  the  table  to  survive.  after  quite  some  time  ,  she  was  able  to  hire  an  agent  to  help  keep  her  career  in  check  or  offer  what’s  best.  the  redhead  was  pleased  with  how  her  life  was  going  even  with  a  few  hardships  here  and  there.

          thankfully  ,  she  and  her  agent  have  been  together  ever  since  ,  and  only  being  in  los  angeles  for  nearly  a  year.  at  the  start  of  her  journey  as  an  a  performer  ,  she  was  eternally  grateful  for  the  roles  she’d  gotten  ...  but  why  did  they  have  to  be  the  most  STEREOTYPICAL  WOMEN  portrayed  on  small  screens  and  big  screens  ?  THIS  occured  a  few  years  before  the  21st  century  !  so  that’s  when  she  started  to  slowly  but  surely  build  her  career.  her  agent  understood  ,  meaning  that  they  stood  by  her  still.  HALLELUJAH  !  grateful  as  ever  ,  léonie  never  once  slowed  down  for  anything.  [  rihanna’s  work  plays  in  the  background  ]  anyways  ,  she  hasn’t  stopped  working.  her  agent  tells  her  that  she’s  a  damn  workaholic  and  all  she  can  respond  with  is ,  ‘  so  are  you  !  ’  or  ‘  that  makes  two  of  us  !  ’  throughout  this  time  ,  léonie  has  secretly  written  and  sold  scripts  to  production  companies  without  receiving  any  of  the  credit.  to  this  day  ,  it’s  probably  what  she  regrets  the  most.

          years  and  years  have  gone  by  and  miss  winters  is  known  for  portraying  very  intense  women  on  the  big  screen.  she  is  probably  most  notable  for  being  cast  as  POISON  IVY  from  the  dc  comics.  winters  almost  dropped  out  of  the  project  without  a  reason  ,  however  she  felt / believed  she  wasn’t  good  enough  to  act  the  part  of  a  unique  character.  later  ,  she’d  take  up  roles  such  as  a  headstrong  business  woman  to  a  spy  and  a  central  intelligence  agent.  for  a  women  to  portray  ‘em  was  possible  in  the  film  industry  and  would  kindly  imply  that  women  shouldn’t  be  afraid  to  follow  their  passions / dreams  no  matter  what  they  were.  her  favorite  role  would  have  to  be  portraying  a  vigilante  with  an  anti - hero  qualities.  forget  about  the  comics  for  a  sec  ,  it  was  an  “original”  script.  yadda  yadda  yadda  ,  LÉONIE’S  AN  A - LIST  ACTRESS.  how  the  fuck  did  that  happen  ?

          appearances  ,  red  carpets  ,  excessive  interviews  ,  traveling  ,  movie  premieres  ,  etc.  the  dutch - american  never  thought  she  would  be  in  the  position  that  she  is  in  currently.  she  has  a  desire  of  wanting  to  disappear  from  the  limelight  and  focus  on  herself  a  little  more  as  she  has  been  described  as  restless  and  anomalous.  this  red  head  in  particular  doesn’t  have  time  for  any  bullshit  NONSENSE  ,  honestly.  leonie’s  gonna  do  what’s  she’s  gotta  do  with  respect  ,  harmony  ,  confidence  ,  and  dignity.  screw  anyone  that’s  out  to  get  her  and  other  women  in  the  industry.  she  will  stand  up  for  everyone  ,  including  talents  that  have  potential.  she’ll  be  following  your  career  without  you  knowing  it.  she’s  full  of  wonder  and  has  an  element  of  surprise.  even  if  she’s  feeling  rather  weary  ,  she’s  still  working  to  the  maximum  degree  today.  the  bitch  needs  to  rest  at  some  point.

━━━━━     extra  info  .

TBA  AS  SOON  AND  THE  MORE  LEONIE  IS  DEVELOPED.  THANKS  FOR  READING.

[gamerzcourt]

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

New Post has been published on https://www.gamerzcourt.com/the-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-music-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggerthe-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-music-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggervideo-games-2/

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

Though Capcom’s action game series has always had a particular sound for its gothic-horror-aesthetic, the current game, Devil May Cry 5, features music that really goes the extra mile to get players to feel something more as they’re working their way up to SSS rank. GameSpot recently interviewed DMC5 composers Cody Matthew Johnson and husband-wife team Casey and Ali Edwards about the making of the action game’s main tracks for its cast of characters. During this talk, they spoke about their collaboration with Capcom, how the game’s energizing and dynamic soundtrack is a game-changer, and what it’s like having the internet embrace their new sound.

Editor’s Note: This interview has been edited for clarity and readability.

Can you talk about what it was like working with Capcom for this project, and how they first got in contact with you?

Casey Edwards: Funny enough, even though I ended up writing the track Devil Trigger, I got found through one of Ali’s older tracks that she did for another video game called Killer Instinct with Mick Gordon [B. Orchid’s Theme, in particular]. I actually did some work on that game as well, assisting the composer.

Ali Edwards: Yeah, it’s like they wanted both of us without knowing that we even knew each other, or that we were married at all.

Casey: Yeah, Capcom heard that particular track and they really liked the drive that it had. It really just stood out to everyone. When I wrote Devil Trigger, I pitched her as the vocalist and they just immediately fell in love with it. So, it kinda just worked out in a weird, coincidental, ironic way.

And Cody, this is actually your third collaboration with Capcom, the first being for Marvel vs Capcom: Infinite?

Cody M. Johnson: That is true. My career is still in the early stages, which is really exciting as all these things are happening. My collaborator Jeff Rona and I did three games back to back for Capcom. We didn’t really stop. We started off with Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite. Right after that came out, word got around to another development team about what we were doing, and they liked what they heard. So they came back to us. Right out of the gate I was working with Jeff, who wrote “Crimson Cloud” [V’s Theme], and I ended up writing “Subhuman” [Dante’s theme]. We worked on Devil May Cry 5 first, but then shortly after that, another team at Capcom hit us up to do Resident Evil 2 shortly after. So it’s been pretty exciting.

Were you fans of the series before you worked on this game?

Cody: I had played Devil May Cry 4 and the previous games a lot. I was still young enough to sneak away and play them with my friends, but it was so hard, I didn’t get very far. Even as an experienced gamer now, I’ve come back to try to play them, when I first picked up Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite–but they’re just so hard. They’re still one of the hardest games I’ve ever played to date.

Casey: I actually grew up playing Devil May Cry. So I remembered the whole Devil Trigger aspect of the game pretty vividly, and that was what was sticking out in my head as I was writing the song. I couldn’t get it out of my head and yeah, I don’t know, I just wrote it and we just went with it. I thought for sure someone from Capcom was gonna send me an email back saying, “Hey, you need to change that.”

Ali: But that didn’t happen. They all loved it.

The big line of the song, “bang, bang, bang, pull my Devil Trigger,” is such an earworm, and it feels so appropriate for the series.

Casey: Right, I remember writing that. I wrote all these lyrics in one sitting, pretty much. For that particular part, I was looking at Ali, and then I verbalized what she was about to sing.

Ali: You were so worried I was gonna hate it!

Casey: To me, that was kind of a fun phrase. I just wasn’t sure if it would latch on to the Devil May Cry fans, you know?

Last I checked, Devil Trigger has over 21 million views on YouTube. Having those earlier reservations, are you surprised to see how much it has taken off?

Casey: Well, first of all, it’s pretty freakin’ crazy. That’s a lot of plays. It kinda blows my mind a little bit. I think there might be a few factors involved in that. People have been really excited to see a continuation of [classic] Devil May Cry. I guess in the sense that you say, the song is holding its own water a little bit as well, yeah, I don’t know what to say other than it’s pretty insane that people have played the song that many times.

Ali: Yeah, it’s definitely something we didn’t expect. We were more worried that fans would hate the track, and it would become a meme. Instead, it became a meme in the best possible way.

Both of you even got to perform the song live at The Game Awards. They had Rivers Cuomo from Weezer introduce your performance.

Casey: Yeah, that was awesome. We actually got to run into Rivers after that, and it was pretty great getting to take pictures with him and nerd out. I mean gosh, yeah, I was listening to them back in high school, so that was pretty awesome. And yeah, getting to play at The Game Awards was, I mean, a dream come true. And I know it’s a relatively new awards show, but they had so many awesome people on stage, and we got to share a stage with Hans Zimmer. That’s nuts.

Ali: Yeah, that was pretty crazy, it was a blast. It was such a crazy production if you think about it. It takes a huge team to put on a production of that magnitude. It’s crazy seeing it all happen, and being a part of it, continuously.

As far as working on Devil May Cry 5, I can only imagine how much planning went into writing the tracks and getting them just write. Can you talk about what the collaborative process was like with the other composers at Capcom.

Cody: Yeah, from the very beginning, Capcom wanted, I should say, independence. They wanted to make sure each of these key tracks could exist separately from one other, but still work together within the Devil May Cry universe. We worked with Kota Suzuki [DMC5’s main composer], who actually wrote the track “Legacy,” which was in the final trailer. He was part of the development team that flew out to LA when we did the recording sessions for the bigger tracks, including “Subhuman” and “Crimson Cloud.” Other than that, Capcom didn’t really restrict us; they really wanted the score in these scenes to give identity to their characters.

Casey: When we were working with Capcom Japan, they had some clear visions for what they wanted for some of these tracks, and it was really nice getting to implement previous work I had done in the game, and getting to bring it to new light towards the end of the gaming experience.

Ali: After they heard me on “Devil Trigger,” I guess maybe that’s when they reached out for “Legacy” with me. I didn’t think was going to happen until the game was released. I wasn’t sure that was ever going to see the light of day in trailer form. And so I remember being pleasantly surprised when that came out. It’s an exciting track, it’s really beautiful, with swelling strings, and it was amazing for the fans to finally hear that. Working with Kota on that was a great experience as well.

That song really comes up at such a great moment in the game. It also highlights how different a lot of the tracks are in the game, yet they work really well when you bring it all together.

Casey: Yeah, for sure. I think that’s one thing people can get lost sometimes. They forget, “Devil Trigger,” for instance, is some weird hybrid rock pop thing, but I am also a classically trained orchestral composer and Ali does anything from soft, ethereal vocals to just mind-blowing powerful pop vocals, and stuff like that.

Ali: I started out as a jazz singer, so there’s that, too. But we got to be totally crazy with it. Working on a session musician, you can be asked to do anything, and I think your willingness to be a chameleon is really where your usability as a session musician really comes into play. The more I can become a chameleon and adhere to different genres of music, I mean, that’s why I’m being asked to work on video games. If I couldn’t do that, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to work on so many incredible games so far.

Looking back on the history of the series, Devil May Cry has this really deep focus on presenting bombastic and energizing tracks. Another game in the series that had a really eclectic soundtrack was Ninja Theory’s DmC: Devil May Cry–featuring Noisia and Combichrist. Did the style of that game have any influence on this one?

Cody: Well from the very start, everything was based on Devil May Cry 4, as in all the references they sent us. But of course, it was something I personally looked into. It’s important to understand the trajectory of all these games, where it’s been, and how the fans reacted. And you need to make a decision about where you want your art to align with. It was very conscious from the very beginning that this game is Devil May Cry 5. That was a very conscious decision, not to stay away from that version of DmC, but to separate from it, stylistically. But yeah, the combat system that matures and alters the music was something we really liked about that game.

It’s really thrilling to hear DMC5’s music evolve depending on how well you’re playing.

Cody: Yeah, It was just something we were very conscious of from the very beginning. We don’t want to leave any players behind, but we didn’t want to make it easier for players either. It’s all about challenging yourself. But the worst thing that could happen would be if the game’s music was boring. I know this as a gamer, I know this as someone who goes listens to the same 32-second track on loop for hours. It’s the worst thing in the world: You’re stuck on a level for three days, you don’t wanna be listening to the same piece of music.

We really tried to craft these songs in a way, that if you don’t hit SSS rank, you don’t ever hear the chorus or the breakdown. By doing that, those parts of the song will never get boring. The goal from the start was to incentivize the player. There is something more, you should do your absolute best to get to your SSS, and you’ll get the payoff. There should be rewards for those players that accomplish that, and I think we achieved something beyond the normal combat music.

Did you enjoy your experience working with Capcom on Devil May Cry 5?

Cody: They’ve always been happy with what we’ve done and we’re always happy to give it to ’em. They’re such an amazing collaborator, and they really care about artistic vision, and they care about what you can bring to the table, and it’s truly an amazing experience working with them.

Casey: I was super excited to work on Devil May Cry. I’ve been playing this game since Devil May Cry 1, which came out in 2001. I remember my mom taking me to Blockbuster to rent it. And then you fast forward to 2017, when I was asked to work on it, I was already so freaking pumped to get started on it. We’re classically trained and I play guitar as well in the STEM program, right? I love doing so many different things and different genres. So being asked to genre hop is one of the best things about working in the field. TV and video games and film, all alike, and one day you could be writing a solo piano piece and the next day you’re writing “Devil Trigger.”

Ali: Yeah, for me, video games have always been a pretty large part of my life. It’s always been a love of mine. So, I remember playing games with my cousins when we were all kids and it was this bonding experience for all of us. And I never would’ve imagined that I’d be working on video games today. It’s kind of crazy to think about, but I absolutely love what I do. I love being able to work on various projects across various genres and kind of become a different person for a little while. And it’s really, really humbling, seeing how the fans have accepted our work. It’s very humbling, it’s very exciting, and, all in all, we’re very grateful to be a part of the Devil May Cry family.

GameSpot – All News

[smols-n-tols]

PD101 S3 Crack

okay, yall, fam, imma bout to expose messnet on pd101 s3, okay? i participated and i have the reciepts, so yall in for a ride. sit back, sip your tea, and lemme tell you about my 101% true account of my time on pd101.

Lmao idek where this idea came from, but y’all in for a ride treat

Anyways, Messnet is back at it again with 101 trainees fighting to the death for the affection of the nation’s producers,,,,yup Produce 101 is back for a season three and it’s dramatic as ever

Anywho, onto the story or lack of,,,,

okAY so let’s start with RBW bc i miss my sons anyways,,,so ya know when the trainees walk through that hallway thing and there’s like dramatic music or some shit?

So somEONE from messnet played that pororo song instead of that weird jungle music dongho always ended up with bc honestly, it’s a mess 

Oh yeah, to address that special stage the trainees do on m!countdown to get exposure and wink their eyes off tryna pull a park jihoon messnet was like, remember when we pulled all that unpredictable shit on yall last year?!?!? yeAH, NO SPECIAL STAGE

So all the viewers went into this blind im soso sorry

Anyways, RBW came in and honestly,,,wOW WHAT SUNSHINE

Also bc i’m a lazy bum who will not account for 101 trainees to fit this crack imagine account, i’m just gonna write about 13 completely random people that just happen to be competing, lmao have a nice day

Okay, back on track, sNAZzy (101% her real name, her stage name is Mehnaz), Dae, and Meg were from this company so you know this shit is about to be wild

So the three of them were all ready to do their bow and greetings and stuff and halfway through their greeting they realized they were the first one there lmAO

Someone save them

So the three of them go to their seats (i dont remember which seat but i heard sNAZzy chuckled over some 6 & 9 number, idek) and sNAZzy is just “do you think they’ll give us bottles of water, i’m kinda thirsty”

Meg: “I’ve travelled all eight floors of this building and there wasn’t a single fountain, I doubt they’ll give us water” her voice all scratchy and she’s just hella dehydrated (someone please quench her thirst)

And Dae, who’s a good story taller than her two labelmates bends down to look under her chair and wow, there’s water

Again, save these fetuses

So a bunch of really small companies came in did their greeting,,,im sorry there’s too much to write so imma just do a couple skips every now and then

Anyways next trainees to make their entrance is YGK+’s,,,which is weird bc they’re a modelling company, at least that’s what they said when they wouldn’t confirm Hyunbin’s stATUS WITH JBJ FOR FIFTY BILLION YEARS

It’s okay, i’m calm, i’m chill, I’m ready to introduce the visual giaNTS that are the YGK+’s trainees

*cut to weird interview room* “hello, nice to meet you, I’m Meike” *polite bow thing* “It’s nice to meet you I’m Laura” *another polite bow*

Interviewer: “Why did you join produce 101?”

Laura: “Well the company said they’ll pay us extra if we-” Meike covered her mouth so quick lmao “We wanted to try something new before we reach 180cm”

*cut back to Meike and Laura walking down the hallway with that Goblin OST playing in the bg*

Other trainees: “wow, they’re so cool and ta-” the chatter stopped when Meike and Laura both bumped their heads on the doorway

Meg: “Why didn’t that happen to you, Dae?”

Dae: “I’m in a perpetual state of slouch to be able to hear you and sNAZzy”

,,,,,,save the fetuses from themselves

So YGK+ introduces themselves and everyone is just in awe bc,,,,,well,,,,they’re tols

The two girls take their seat and nurse their bruised foreheads

Anyways, right after YGK+, BNM popped up on the screen and everyone was shookth

Bc BNM had two trainees in the final line-up last year and all the fangirls knew about donghyun’s bf goals + youngmin’s saTOORI ILY IN GOOD DAY

So yeah, shookth

And messnet decided to screw with all of us bc they had two people pull out a smoke machine and out of nowhere lights started flashing

Lmao, it was like a free laser light show

Suddenly one person emerged from the smoke and took center stage “hi everyone, i’m Carina, please look kindly onto me”

And the whole room just went yES WE ARE GIRLS WHO SUPPORT OTHER GIRLS

So Carina goes to her seat and she sits down next to the YGK+ trainees and they introduce themselves to each other

Meike: “Why’d you bring your own water bottle, they gave us a complimentary one so we don’t expose them for evil editing and neglect”

Carina: “lmAO NO. It’s vodka, no way am i getting through another season of this sober.”

[frvddiemercury]

“I just want to run my fingers through your hair.” / “That was a nice surprise. What’s the occasion?” / “I cleared my schedule to spend all day with you.” / “How did you like the flowers?” / “You’re mine. Don’t forget that. You promised.” / “Don’t go in today. Stay in bed with me.”

lol !!!!!!

“you’re mine. don’t forget that. you promised.”

[ post break-up universe ]  the words had aza’s ears ringing & heart t h r o b b i n g to the intense beat of grey’s voice - he closed his eyes & ceased to exist for just a split second. blank brain, blank thoughts, calm. he took a breath; inhaled, exhaled, concentrated. when he reopened his eyes he was, of c o u r s e, met with the familiar dread. “i promised years ago.” he reminded, voice c r a c k i n g under the pressure of the heavy words. he couldn’t comprehend how to get out of the situation he found himself in; he loved grey, or at least, he figured he did. this was love - grey loved him, no one else would ever love him like grey did. why else would he be risking everything ?? why else did he risk everything to begin with ?? grey adored aza, he was dead sure. “if i’m yours,” he tried again, accent a mere shattered collection of syllables as he tried with desperation to string together a somewhat coherent sentence. “then that means you must be mine - doesn’t it ?? it doesn’t work one way only.” he reminded. “i’m older now - we both are - it’s easier to make sense of things now.” he tried to reason with the man, shaking his head. “you promised, too.” he muttered eventually, eyes closing once again. “but you never kept any of your promises. i can’t expect you to start now.”

“how did you like the flowers?”

[ post break-up universe ] when they had arrived earlier that morning, aza had been completely dumbfounded & utterly d r o w n e d in anxiety. he’d sat staring at them for hours, twiddling his thumbs. it wasn’t a big deal - they weren’t a big deal. in fact, in the realm of the stuff grey had done since they’d somewhat reconciled, these were mild. white roses. that’s all they were. a bouquet of g o r g e o u s white roses - expensive, luxurious, everything aza appreciated, yet somehow he hated them. maybe that had something the name on the label. grey had, of course, showed up mere hours later, & was currently stood in aza’s kitchen, causing the blonde to feel sick with a whirlwind of emotive thoughts & feelings. “i- they’re nice.” he commented, throat dry & words sticking to the inside of it, letters sliding down his oesophagus & making a muddle of sentences. that wasn’t good enough of grey, of course, & so aza followed up quickly. “really nice. i really uh - i liked them. i like them.” he confirmed. “thank you for being so generous.” he said softly, eye contact breaking in heed of aza’s going directly to the floor. “i’m sorry i didn’t answer your calls last night, i fell to sleep.” he excused, knowing grey wouldn’t believe it for a moment. he wasn’t sure why he felt so n e r v o u s around the man; they were good together - even if they weren’t actually together. he was just so desperate to impress grey, for obvious reasons. “is.. uh, is vanessa back ??” 

“I cleared my schedule to spend all day with you.”

[ regular marriage universe ] aza sometimes didn’t quite understand grey. in fact, that was an understatement. he struggled to understand grey at the very best of times - even after years of marriage he s t r u g g l e d; it was quite difficult to read such a person, really. they’d barely seen eachother recently; grey was always busy, & aza was in the studio a lot too. or rather, he was in the studio as much as he could be, but now his album was coming to it’s final stages of production & all of a sudden grey had become very protective, very time consuming, very c l i n g y. he’d played this game before; grey hated aza being busy with his career, even when he was busy with his own, & so every time this happened ( or something like this ), grey got unbearably clingy. he’d stop working as much, or even completely, & he’d constantly be on aza’s back for time. not only that, but he’d get offended when aza was too busy for him & they’d end up fighting. that morning, it had been no different to usual; aza had said goodbye to grey at around eight, & wasn’t expecting him back until later that evening. he’d mentioned briefly his plans to go to the studio for the day & do some finishing touches, but hadn’t thought much of it. it was now around ten & aza was sat in the kitchen, hades by his side & a coffee on the island next to his macbook, by which he was using to respond to emails before planning on driving to the studio just a bit later. he glanced up when he heard the door, frowning a tad, & was faced with his husband, which was surprising as much as it shouldn’t of been. “what do you mean ??” he asked, shaking his head slightly & taking a sip of his coffee in order to break the eye contact for just a moment. “didn’t you have super important stuff to do today ?? grey, i told you, i have a studio session at twelve thirty.” he informed, though he knew grey knew that all too well. “i have to get this album finished. why do you always do this ??”

“that was a nice surprise. what’s the occasion?”

[ regular marriage universe ] the sunlight streaming through the shutters & the bearing heat of the LA morning had naturally woken aza from his s l u m b e r around an hour prior to usual - that was around five, which was just around the time grey usually got up to go & exercise, which was a fact aza decided to use to his advantage. his husband had been ridiculously busy recently with his latest case & although aza was used to it by now ( he was busy too - the new album was due to drop in the next three weeks ), that didn’t mean he didn’t miss grey. in fact, he m i s s e d him an awful lot, & it would’ve been a missed opportunity not to at least try & get some of grey’s p r e c i o u s time. he’d awoken & studied his stirring lover for just a moment, before leaning over & pecking his lips softly, & continuing on to moving his legs in order to straddle grey’s waist over the duvet. he leaned down again & pressed a soft kiss to the temple of his husband’s head, & continued to pepper loving kisses around the area until grey was entirely awake & staring at him. “no occasion, you just looked really pretty.” he said fondly - pretty wasn’t a word most would use to describe grey. not because he wasn’t attractive - he was honestly g o r g e o u s - but because he was tough & intimidating beyond belief. aza knew that above anyone, but that didn’t stop the nickname. “i’ve missed you.” he commented, fingers tracing his husbands bare chest. “what do you say you skip the workout today & spend an extra hour in bed ?? i mean, i can probably get you sweaty some other way.”

“I just want to run my fingers through your hair.”

[ lia & lorenzo universe ] aza’s hips moved ( unintentionally ) rhythmically against the marble kitchen counter as he felt his husbands familiar fingertips run over the nape of his neck & he grinned fondly to himself, turning around slightly in distraction to what he was doing - cooking breakfast. he turned fully when he recognised grey’s tie was in fact untied, & he rolled his eyes. “you can do that tonight, you have a big meeting this morning.” he reminded; grey had woken in an e x c e l l e n t mood that morning & although aza wasn’t complaining, he had to ensure everything still ran smoothly, because tomorrow grey’s mood might be erratic again & he’d have to deal with the mess that followed. his eyes cast down that of his husband as his fingertips got busy around the silk of the tie, tying it to perfection & smoothing it down once complete. “there.” he said, satisfied, & leaned up to peck grey’s lips. “my parents have the kids tonight, remember ?? you need to be finished with work by three so we can go & get ready for this gala.” he reminded; public events were a n i g h t m a r e usually, but aza was determined for this one to go well. “we can sneak out early & come home, though. i promise. just let the paparazzi get their pictures & the press to have their interviews n’ we can go - then, you can run your fingers through my hair as much as you’d like. i might even let you do other stuff with them too.” he teased, hands on grey’s broad shoulders. “sound fair ??”

“don’t go in today. stay in bed with me.”

[ private school universe ] tugging at the hem of his jeans, aza scoffed slightly & glanced over at his boyfriend, the man seemingly uncouth & lacking any sense of care regarding skipping classes. aza wished he could be that lackluster with school; naomi would kill him - quite literally. well, perhaps not. aza wouldn’t put it past her, though. he shook his head, lips in a turned smirk. “you wish, princess.” he teased the name, the name grey usually taunted him with - aza enjoyed fucking with grey, especially at such an early hour. “you forget i have an overbearing mother to deal with, don’t you ?? i have grades to keep, otherwise she’ll berate me at the annual family get together again, & you know my families considerations about me are SO important.” he mocked, shaking his head again & laughing audibly, but not too audible as to draw attention to his presence. he didn’t need dwight nor saskia hearing him; he wasn’t meant to be there ( his 3am window climb into grey’s bedroom had proved that ). “but don’t worry, sweet pea. i’ll tell your prof’ you’re sick - spin him some story about how you cheated on me n’ now you’re stuck with a nasty case of chlamydia. maybe he’ll feel bad for me n’ let me leave early.” aza shrugged & gave a wink, grabbing his shoes & moving to peck grey’s lips. “call me later, yeah ??”

[myselfinserts]

“Your protection is based on the fact that people are scared of you.”

Regi had woken up early to get the prep work done on the stage set for the upcoming production. He’d heard through the grapevine that his old troupe, the Golden Sanctum, were putting on a production based around Van Helsing. So, in order to avoid an obvious scandal, Mirage changed their show last minute to one of their most popular productions. A ballet retelling of The Scarlet Pimpernel, complete with their Lady Lazarus as the graceful and powerful Madame Guillotine. This would be followed up by two more of their popular shows, but ones that had not recently in circulation. That being the story of Jekyll and Hyde, and a masterful performance of La Boutique fantasque. Only after that would they finally do Dracula. 

While he was a little disappointed this meant his vacation would have to wait, he was more than happy to work the stage for these two shows. Besides that, it gave him a chance to get to know the new hire, Lucien Adaire. Ceri and Étienne seemed exceptionally keen on having them join, and Regi had to admit, the newbie could dance. 

His face burned just remembering the way their body pressed against his in that dance off. 

“Stop it Regi,” he chided himself. “That’s not appropriate. Just focus on work.” He pressed the little remote on his lanyad, stuffing it into his outer shirt before slipping into his work harness and starting in on the assembly of the guillotine prop. The music burst to life on the theater’s speakers, he hooked himself to the repel wires, and got to work. 

It was a simple enough set up. Several steps on either side of a platform that lead up to a guillotine with a foam blade. First he’d finish setting up the platform, adding the stairs and making sure they were secure before putting together the actual prop. He focused his energy into timing his movements to every song on his playlist. Soon, the rest of the world faded away. All that was, was himself, the stage, and the music. 

As the first hour passed, he felt himself grow more excited, and he soon began to sing along to every song that would play. He didn’t realize how loud he was being until he got to the chorus of one of his favorites. 

“'cause an empty room can be so loud It's too many tears to drown them out So hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on-”

“Uh, hi there?”

Regi stopped singing, snapping back to reality just as he was about to release the rope to test the guillotine. He looked over to stage right, taken aback when he saw Adaire standing there in their practice clothes. It was a one piece full leotard with a tank top style for the top half. A loose white shirt exposing their shoulders and the straps dangled off them. And...

Oh my god, is that...is that a vine red tattoo coming off their shoulder? Oh good god it is. That’s...that’s really hot.

Lucien pointed at the stage prop. “Is that real, or-”

Regi looked at the prop, laughing softly as he released the rope. “No, it’s not. The blade’s made of foam. Just wait until you see Lady L up here with the red lights and all.”

“Right. I thought ‘Madame Guillotine” was metaphorical?”

“Yeah, but ballet is interpretive anyway.”

“Right...”

Regi descended from his perch, getting free of his harness before turning off the music. “I didn’t wake you, I hope.”

“No, it’s fine,” Lucien assured. “I couldn’t sleep anyway. Too much tension.”

“I get that. First night at the theater can be pretty stressful.”

“That and other things.” They tilted their head and, oh god, did Regi have to struggle to remain calm at the light movement of muscle. “You seem anxious.”

“Huh? Oh.” Regi tried to brush it off. “I’m just not used to newbies who aren’t nervous around us. Last one we got was Toni and...well, he’s almost as much a scuttle-bug as Elmo.”

Lucien shrugged, walking past him to examine the stage a bit more. “I’ve met monsters scarier than you people. Believe me, you’re all a bunch of kittens compared to someone else.”

“Don’t let L hear you say that. She’ll take offence.” 

“I’ll apologize if it ever comes up. And if I get the chance to see how scary she is.” They smiled fondly. “Honestly, it’d be a nice change of pace from my usual terrors.”

For some reason, hearing that broke his heart. Regi quietly walked up beside them, lightly taking their hand absentmindedly. “You know...when I first joined Mirage, I wasn’t in too good a place myself.” 

Lucien stared at him with a quizzical look. “That’s hard to believe, considering how well you’re doing now.”

“It’s true though.” He let out a hard sigh. “I’d just gotten out of the hospital after an allergic reaction. Someone put papaya in my smoothie after I reminded them. Missed my big break as the Nutcracker prince that year. Got relegated to backstage only. It was miserable. I barely got paid, and some days I skipped eating all together just to make rent. Marianne had to take on an extra job, and Tanith was on the verge of dropping out of school completely. Our family wasn’t very rich, and our uncle getting into an accident and ending up in a wheelchair put us on the ropes.”

“That’s terrible.”

“It was.” He smiled fondly, reminiscing on that time. He could still see his parents panicking in the kitchen late at night not long after Elbert came home. “I owe Mirage everything. They saved my family. They got me out of the darkest moment of my life.” He looked at them, feeling a strong warmth in his heart as he remembered the very first performance. “They made me feel like I was worth having around. That I was wanted because I’m me, not just because of my skills. And that...that’s something you can’t pay for.”

Lucien smiled brightly, and Regi felt his heart skip a beat. This wasn’t a look he was used to having aimed at him. The way their pink eyes gleamed like gemstones, the softness in their face. It was pure and, if he had to describe it accurately...almost regal. 

After a moment, Regi realized he was still holding their hand. He quickly let go and stepped back. “S-sorry. We only just met, that was...uh...”

“Don’t apologize,” Lucien chuckled. “Honestly, that was probably what I needed to hear right now. Thank you.”

“Oh. Uh...you’re welcome.” Regi thought their laugh sounded like music. 

Lucien looked back at the stage prop. “Anything I can help you with? It seems like a lot.”

Regi recomposed himself, shaking his head. “No, it’s alright. I’ve gotta take a break anyway.” He twirled the end of his ponytail around his finger as he checked the time. He winced when he realized it was almost ten. Time really had gotten away from them. “Everyone else should be getting in soon anyway. Want to make some tea?”

“I’m alright. I might just do some stretches.” They went over to an empty part of the stage. “I usually eat after morning stretches.”

“Oh. Okay, that sounds-”

“There you are, Adaire.”

Lucien froze, completely stiffening up as their face went completely pale. Regi looked over at the far back entrance, taken aback as he saw someone in a nice suit approaching. This person seemed to fill up the entire room. 

It wasn’t until he got up to the front rows that Regi recognized who it was. 

Oh god. Boniface Maddox. 

“M-mr. Maddox,” Lucien stammered, hurrying off stage and heading over to him. “What are you-?”

“I went by your apartment to see if you’d fallen ill,” Maddox said, a sickly sweet attempt of worry coating every word. “You didn’t show up for 5:30 check in. I got scared. What happened?”

Lucien’s fists clenched tightly. “I...I was just...”

Maddox stepped in closer, lightly caressing their face. “You really put me in a bind, my dear boy. You’re my best dancer. I’d be at a loss without you.”

As Lucien stepped back, something twisted in Regi’s gut. For some reason, this was pissing him off. 

Maddox’s gaze softened as he tried to reach out to them again. “Come now, Mr. Adaire. Let’s go back. The stage awaits you, lad.”

Lucien was practically on the verge of tears. 

Regi quickly jumped down, getting between the two of them and slapping his hand away from them. “The theater isn’t open for visitors. You’re trespassing. Get the fuck out before I make you.”

Maddox’s eyes went wide in surprise, before a cruel smirk took its place. “Reginald Gladstone. Heard you haven’t been dancing much lately.”

“I’ve been dancing plenty. A lot more than at Golden Sanctum.”

“So I heard otherwise. Something about a papaya incident?” He looked past Regi, turning his full attention back to Lucien. “You know, he’d applied to work at the casino before you? Didn’t end up even getting him in the door for an interview. A pity.” He looked back to Regi. “Your light shows are something to behold, I hear.”

“They are. And that’s one of the many reasons he’s one of our most valuable players.”

Regi felt the fear in his shoulders vanish as he saw Ceri, Étienne, Marianne, Phoenix, and Aizawa come storming in. All of them were practically fuming. If he was right, Aizawa seemed to have his hand on a taser on his belt. 

Maddox seemed unfased, still taking up the entire space. “Ah, good to see you all again.” His eyes darted low on Marianne, who was wearing a red swing dress with the top buttons slightly undone under her doctor’s coat. “Lovely as ever, Dr.-”

Marianne scowled. “Eyes up, asshole.”

“I don’t know what you mean.” 

“Pig.”

Maddox shrugged, ignoring them and taking a step toward Adaire. “I’ll just take my employee back and be out of your hair-”

Regi stepped between them, practically hissing. “Back. Off. They’re staying here.”

Étienne joined him, holding up the two contracts. “Adaire is no longer your employee. As of last night, they are officially a member of Mirage.”

“If this dissatisfies you,” Ceri added snidely, “you could always have your lawyer talk to ours.”

Phoenix gave him a delighted grin. “Might wanna leave now or else.”

Regi felt a hand grab the back of his shirt tightly. Maddox’s demeanor changed almost immediately. The smile faded to a glare, the light in his eyes faded, and the air began to feel suffocating. Regi glanced over his shoulder, nearly startled a the look of defeated terror on Lucien’s face. 

“Adaire,” he growled, his voice low and threatening. “We’re going. Now.”

“Don’t,” Regi whispered. “Lucien-”

“Now, Adaire.”

Lucien lowered their head, barely managing an ‘I’m sorry’ before letting go of Regi. 

And just as they did, the lights of the theater went out. 

Before anyone had the chance to panic, the swelling of an orchestra began to play, a bright red spotlight aimed right at the top of the steps where the guillotine prop stood. And beside it, at the top of the steps dressed in glittering tulle and silk, was Lady Lazarus standing en pointe. Regi took the opportunity to pull Lucien out of the way, hurrying them behind Aizawa as L began to dance her way down the steps. Everyone made space, allowing L a direct path to Maddox. 

Maddox watched as she moved, trying to remained in control as his presence in the theater. With every step, every bend, his control over the atmosphere was fading. 

If he wasn’t so enraged, Regi would have had the right idea to be terrified. 

L descended from the stage, the lights returning as she got right up in Maddox’s face. Her face remained neutral, almost bored in her mask. But everyone could tell how infuriated she was beneath the fabric and sequins. 

The music came to a close, and L grabbed Maddox by the tie. 

“Lucien Adaire is no longer a part of your company,” she stated bluntly. “They are a member of Mirage, and you are not only trespassing, but stalking and harassing. We don’t take kindly to that here. We’re giving you one last chance to leave peacefully.”

Maddox sneered at her. “I have this entire city wrapped around my finger. If Adaire doesn’t come with me now, I can’t protect him from what might happen next. If he cares about his career, he’ll stop this childish game and come home.”

“I see.”

Much to everyone’s shock, L tugged hard on Maddox’s tie and spun him around, knocking him to the ground with a light twirl. Before he could react, L put a toe on his forehead, leaning forward slightly. 

Now Regi was starting to feel terrified. 

But he didn’t show it. Any of Mirage showing fear right now was bad. 

L’s voice went cold, almost hauntingly so. “Your protection is based on the fact that people are scared of you. They’re terrified of what you’ll do to their careers. To their homes. Their families. That’s why so many of the other performing arts groups don’t try to compete with you for turf and stage time. You have the connections to shut everyone down.” She smiled, and everyone could see the fear flicker in Maddox’s pitch black eyes. “Everyone, except for Mirage. We scare you because you can’t control us. And you never will be able to. Now.” She leaned even more forward, putting a little more pressure on his forehead. “I’m giving you one. Last. Chance. Leave or else.”

L backed off, standing up straight as everyone watched him struggle to move. Maddox swallowed thickly as he was finally allowed up. He tried to hide it, but it was clear to everyone Maddox was panicking. 

“Or else what?” he asked. 

“Or else,” L said coyly, “you’ll learn why we added the role of Madame Guillotine to our interpretation of this story.”

The theater was filled with a loud cackle, and everyone turned their attention to the guillotine once more. Inkwell held the rope, laughing maniacally, a fluffy white cat dangling around his shoulders. He released it, and the blade came down.

And sliced a watermelon that had been placed there right in two. 

Regi went slack jawed. 

No way. The blade’s supposed to be foam!

This seemed enough for Maddox. He shot them all one last glare before storming towards the exit. 

“You’ll be ruined for this, Adaire!” he screamed. “You better hope nothing happens with Mirage, or you can kiss your career in this industry goodbye!”

With a slam of the door, Maddox was gone. 

And immediately Phoenix and Marianne ran to catch L. 

“I thought he’d never leave,” she whined. “Phoenix, Mari, why did the stupidhead have to ruin a perfectly good morning?”

Marianne rolled her eyes. “Because he’s, as you say, a stupidhead.”

“Come on,” Phoenix cooed. “Let’s eat. You must be hungry.”

“I am.” L looked over at Ceri, and Regi knew she was batting her eyes under that mask. “Ceri, dear, can we have some chocolate crepes? And lots of whipped cream?”

Ceri chuckled. “Coming right up. I think a nice brunch is in order before we head to the country house.”

“Yay!”

As Regi felt himself relax, he looked back to Lucien, who seemed completely spaced out. “Lucien? Hey, Adaire? You okay?”

“Huh?” Lucien looked at him, barely managing a smile. “Y-yeah...I’m okay. I’m just...uh...”

“I know.” He wrapped an arm around their shoulders. “It’ll be okay. Come on.” 

Regi escorted them backstage, making note to ask Inkwell when he switched out the blades. He settled them down, fixing them a cup of hot chocolate before letting Ceri take over kitchen duty. He sat beside them, keeping an arm around them as they finally started to relax. 

“You nearly ended up working at the casino?” Luci finally asked. 

Regi nodded. “I was desperate. I knew it was a bad idea, but...Tanith needed to go to school. I’d just put the application in and the next day Étienne approached me at the bar of one of the nearby hotels.”

They rested their head on his shoulder, the life barely clinging to their eyes. “You weren’t lying when you said Mirage saved you. I’m glad you avoided it.”

“Me too.” He lightly rubbed soothing circles on their arm. “I’m sorry you had to put up with him for so long. But you’re free now.”

“...Yeah...guess I am.”

Regi didn’t dare move for the rest of the morning. He stayed by their side until Matthews arrived with the van and it was time for those who had to leave to head out. Before they left though, Regi handed Lucien his number. 

“If anything happens,” he said, “you call me, and I’ll be there as soon as I can. Okay, Lucien?”

“....Luci.”

“Huh?”

Lucien smiled. “Call me Luci.”

Regi couldn’t help the burning sensation in his face. “Sure thing, Luci.”

Regi stayed outside and watched until the van was out of sight. 

He hoped he wouldn’t have to wait long to talk to them again.

[asonginitsplace-blog]

Beginning: Interviews

Okay, so I’m actually going to go way back in time here. 

A year ago (plus two days now) I interviewed for the school I’m now working for. 

So how did I get here? 

Well, I signed up for the international school company I’m using (ISS Schrole) and discovered the next job fair, the last in-person one for the upcoming academic year, was in February. I buckled myself up and booked a flight out and a room in the hotel the fair took place in. (I took one day off of work, flying out directly after school on Thursday.) 

I prepped my resume. What was I doing at my current school that would fly with international schools? What had I done before then? I listened to my dad and countless job-hunting videos and podcasts and pared my resume down to one page, front and back, and wrote a generalized cover letter that made me uncomfortable but made my friends scream in support. (I don’t really like giving myself a lot of attention, but this is necessary. Ya gotta sell yourself!) 

The day before my interview, I went to a bunch of sessions on schools. I mustered all my introverted courage and introduced myself to each school director/admin:  “Hi! I noticed you did/didn’t have a listing for a music teacher. My name is [name]. Is that position open/is it true there isn’t a position?”  If there WAS an open position, I had a resume ready with my picture on top (I printed ten of these). If there WASN’T an open position, I smiled warmly, wished them the best of luck, shook their hand or did something equivalent, and backed right off.  It’s great to leave a decent impression, but I didn’t want to waste any time. 

I also took myself to In-N-Out, because I’d never had it and we were in California, so like...yeah. 

The morning of, I dolled myself up (you feel better when you look good, and I like looking good and feeling good) and sent a selfie to my dad and ever-supportive stepmom. They both wished me luck and complimented the outfit. M told me to land a job somewhere with good food. I said I’d try my best.  I found a spot in line with some people I’d met the day before. We hyped each other up, compared the amount of resumes printed, and discussed game plans. Then the doors opened and we wished each other luck.  Again, circling the room, I looked for open music positions. I had a list of schools to go to, plus a school I’d applied to and had informed me previous to the fair that the position was filled. I signed up for interviews at the places with still-open positions, thanked the school that had gotten back to me, and canvassed the room again. I waited in several long lines and dropped off resumes with pictures and without, and signed up for interviews throughout the day.  I got three interviews. I felt quite discouraged by it, in all honesty, but you know what, I have a specialty job. I tried not to freak out and went to a cafe nearby to get a coffee and some deep breaths. 

I touched up my makeup before interviews and asked my dad and M for no-go lists (they tangentially work for the government, so I wanted to make sure they’d be able to see me/talk to me while I was working abroad). I sent in applications to schools that I didn’t see at the fair, but had open positions. I stubbornly refused to freak out. 

And then I did my interviews. 

I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I had good interviews. I’m a quirky enough person to be memorable, but I also tend to be fairly charming, and I actually enjoy talking to new people. I often find interviews very fun. 

Surprisingly enough, the job I ended up going with is the job where I cried in the interview. 

Yes, that’s right, I cried in the interview!!! 

A little backstory: I moved to STL, like I mentioned, to be with my sick grandmother. She had stage 4 lung cancer. My other grandmother had been suffering from dementia for about 8 years at that point. My remaining grandfather was on oxygen already.  In October of 2018, all three of my living grandparents passed. It happened incredibly quickly, and I had extra duties with my school (girl’s volleyball coach!!) that didn’t really allow me to sit and feel. So I didn’t. And I continued to not do so, all through Christmas and New Year’s and the first month of the year.  When asked why I delayed going abroad a year when I so obviously wanted this experience, I do what I always do in interviews: answer honestly.  And I surprised myself by becoming very emotional. I cared a lot for the kids that I was teaching, but I also cared a lot about my grandparents. I know my kids empathized with my loss, but I didn't want to burden them with my grief when they had plenty of their own. I felt isolated from parts of my family and therefore felt I couldn't grieve. I felt “too sad” for all my friends. Basically, I hadn't acknowledged my emotions at all, and when asked to, I fell apart a little. 

Now I’m not talking I sobbed and needed tissues, but I did choke up and ask for a minute, let out some “um”s and took some deep breaths. 

But hey, I was asked if I’d be willing to do a second interview! 

I went back to my room, then out for some lunch, then back to my room for more applications (just in case) and a little freshening up. Went to the cocktail party, where I thought I might drink and then nothing appealed to me so...I grabbed a soda. No judgement from people around me, thank god. I chatted with a few admin from schools around the world, a few people who I’d met who were teachers, and nibbled a bit. It was good conversation and pretty good food, and I tried to socialize as much as possible. 

I was pretty tired, though, and headed out early in the morning. My second interview was delayed due to a delay in flight-- I actually ended up landing in STL at 1am due to an ice storm and went back to teaching 5 hours later.

I was exhausted, but teaching doesn’t stop. So neither did I. 

I was offered the job and given a week to decide, which was pretty damn generous. I was put in contact with the teacher I’d be replacing, but I knew as soon as I got off the phone with an admin at this school. 

Texted my dad “I think I’m moving to India.”

He texted back a few the scream emojis and then said he wasn’t really surprised, that it should be educational. 

Four months later, I moved all my stuff back to the east coast. A month after that, I moved to India. A few months later, my cat followed me. 

Welcome to the adventure :) 

[savagegardenforever]

MSN Chat transcript with Darren Hayes of Savage Garden

From

Savage Garden Offical Site

MSN Chat transcript with Darren Hayes of Savage Garden

 Thursday, October 7, 1999

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Tonight we are very excited to welcome to MSN, Darren Hayes of Savage Garden. Darren's new CD "Affirmation" premieres next month

  Digital Dish Diva says:  Darren, welcome to MSN! Congratulations on your new single! It's fabulous! Well, there are a lot of fans here, so let's get started!     

Darren Hayes says:  I'm thrilled out of my brain to be here. I'm more excited than you are!

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Cosette says: I'd like to ask if the worldwide release of "Affirmation" will be enhanced or have an interview disk. Thanks!

 Darren Hayes says:  Cosette, It¹s only the Australian version that has CD Rom component and an extra track. In Japan there is a small component plus a bonus track, but it's different than Australia.

Digital Dish Diva says:  heather3 says: Can you tell us the mood of "Affirmations"? I LOVE YOU!

 Darren Hayes says:  Heather, thank you, I love you too. "Affirmation" is beautifully sad. It is about relationships. It is very personal. It's an album about accepting that life presents you with struggles. Sometimes we fall down but we get back up again and we're stronger for it.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  BJ says: When is "Affirmation" coming out?

 Darren Hayes says:  BJ, November 9 in the U.S. and October 25 I think in the rest of the world. It's all on the website.  I just make the art guys.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  mag4daz says: How do u feel like when you are on the stage and you see all these people in front of you who love you so much?

 Darren Hayes says:  mag4daz, you know the first time around I didn't open my eyes a lot and I was very shocked to see the support and the love. The last couple of years have amazing. It¹s been a bit tough personally but fan letters and support and interest on the Internet has been such a warm relief for me. I feel touched and honored and this time I'm making an effort to open my eyes and take it all in.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  violetfly says: When discussing the debut album, you said that you felt your sound would follow in the vein of "Carry on Dancing" and "Mine." Do you think "Affirmation" has done that?

 Darren Hayes says:  Violetfly,  its very moody and its a bit deceptive because the first songs are quite poppy. I used to listen to the comments made on BBS about "I Knew I loved You"  and many were concerned it was a boy band record  but the reality is "I Knew I Loved You" is the only song that sounds like that. It¹s the only happy "up" naive love song that goes to a lot of dark places. If you liked "Mine" you'll love "Gunning Down Romance"

 Digital Dish Diva says:  TMD says: Hi Darren! What has been different in writing "Affirmation" than your first record?

 Darren Hayes says:  TMD, logistically Daniel and I were in two separate places. He'd send me disks and I'd record lyrics to instrumentals. It¹s a more personal record than the first one and we had more money and time to spend, which you can hear. It still sounds like Savage Garden with a sense of melancholy and atmospheric.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Ashley says: On the new album, which song means the most to you personally?

 Darren Hayes says:  Ashley, that¹s a tough one, it's such a personal record. I'd say my favorite songs include "Affirmation," "I Don't Know You Anymore," and "The Lover After Me."

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Lil_Princess says: I loved the "Cherry Cola" song, how did you sing so fast?

 Darren Hayes says:  Lil_Princess, it¹s called studio technology and I learned the hard way when we went on tour for eight months. The key is lots of breathing. Do aerobics!

 Digital Dish Diva says:  daBomb says: When are you planning to do a tour of the States and Britain?

 Darren Hayes says:  daBomb: We won't be touring until summer 2000. We are just about to head out on an endless promotion run which takes us everywhere. We'll have a short break for Christmas. We plan to tour Australia in March and the rest of the world after.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  rainey says: What TV shows will you be appearing on?

 Darren Hayes says:  rainey, pretty much everyone you can imagine in America. We'll be on "MTV TRL" tomorrow and in November "Rosie," "The View," "CNN Live," "Top of the Pops" in the UK, "Hit Machine" in France, "Hey, Hey it's Saturday" You name it. We're booked on it.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Ashley says: Do you read the bulletin board on your website?  If so, some of the posts must be quite funny to you :o).

 Darren Hayes says:  Ashley, sometimes I read the bulletin boards. I  have to be honest guys, it's kind of damaging to my self-esteem sometimes. I respect that it¹s your world and you should be able to say what you want to say but if you think you have a hair obsession. I¹ve been questioning my hair lately! The support on the website blows me away. I feel undeserving sometimes and can't wait to go out on tour and thank everyone personally.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Ultravioletsky says: I can't wait to see SG on Rosie on Nov 11 can you tell us which song you're performing and if there will be an interview or not?

 Darren Hayes says:  Ultra, we will be performing  "I Knew I Loved You" for Rosie and most likely we will have a small chat because we love her and she loves us. I've recorded a Christmas song for Rosie¹s album and there's a special with me, Celine Dion, NSYNC, and I think I¹m recording that soon. Its a record for charity and its going to help children everywhere o you should really check it out.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  This CD will be available in November from Sony.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  davids_lover says: How did you think of the name Savage Garden.

 Darren Hayes says:  davids lover, this is the oldest question. I think everybody knows. Anne Rice.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  sabraina_93021 says: What is the weirdest thing anyone has ever done to get closer to you or meet you? What was your reaction? I LOVE YOU!

 Darren Hayes says:  sabraina, I think everyone knows. It was the fan in Singapore who sprayed me in the face with a water pistol. That scared the hell out of me! I once had to sign the nipple of a transvestite. Does that count?

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Amandabug says: Darren, are you guys booked for "Saturday Night Live"?

 Darren Hayes says:  Amandabug, Nina, our stylist works for "SNL," and I'm obsessed with the show. So between the two of us I think that's going to happen pretty soon.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Moon_owl says: Hey Darren! How long have you had your Darth Vader phone? I love it!

 Darren Hayes says:  Moon, Darth Vader was a present from my manager Larry last year. I've just bought my first home and I dusted off my phone from the attic and it takes pride and joy in my bedroom wing and yes it is a wing, folks!

 Digital Dish Diva says:  karyn says: What's the weirdest thing that has ever been thrown on stage?

 Darren Hayes says:  karyn, I would say the weirdest things are harmful things like empty bottles. You don't have to be Yoda to figure out a bottle hurts. Those chuppa chupps and those soft toys. Rather than spend money on soft animals or toys. If you want to make me happy, donate those to hospitals or throw a note on the stage telling me you've donated $1 charity and that would make me happier than any gift you could give me.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Tangodess says: Hi, Darren how hard has it been leaving your family for months at a time. How do you survive?

 Darren Hayes says:  I adore my ex-wife and she will always be my soul mate but we're not married anymore. We talk on the phone every other day and we have Oola and Obi. We share joint custody of our cocker spaniels. I go to Brisbane more than you would know  and I often fly my family out to see me. My sister just left and my brother and sister in law and new baby will be out in November.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Sherry30 says: Darren have you gotten the chance to visit Skywalker Ranch?

 Darren Hayes says:  Sherry, I am constantly six degrees of separation from Madonna, Michael Jackson and Lucas. Let me explain. George Lucas is good friends with Walter, who produced our album. My trainer is Lucas's trainer and recently Lucas¹s daughter requested an audience with 

Darren Hayes says:  I saw the new "Star Wars" with Lucas, the first screening and I didn¹t want to overstay my welcome. I've been to the ranch a few times. Its about twenty minutes away, possibly why I moved to San Francisco and George, if you're listening, I do want to audition for the second film.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Savagebabe_23 says: Darren how could you describe the new album to us in three words?

 Darren Hayes says:  Savagebabe, bittersweet, sad, beautiful.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Utopia says: What is the voice in "I Want You" saying? Is it in Latin?

 Darren Hayes says:  Utopia it's in Latin and we have no idea. I suspect it was saying "Buy this record now"

 Digital Dish Diva says:  kitten says:  What do you like to do in your spare time when you have any?

 Darren Hayes says:  kitten, simple things I love going to restaurants, just relaxing. I really enjoy fitness so I go to the gym a lot and I'm completely aware I don't look like Brad Pitt. Recently I've taken up hiking. I¹m also decorating my house. I've had fun buying furniture and making my own.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  TMD says: Hi Darren! What do you think about the new Star War movie? :)

 Darren Hayes says:  TMD, I loved it.  I think like the first trilogy it will get better, but I'm definitely a Jar Jar Binks supporter and I do a mean impression.

  Digital Dish Diva says:  Wendolyn says: Do people recognize you often in public, Darren? =)

 Darren Hayes says:  Wendolyn, I think around the time of "Truly Madly Deeply" going to #1 in America. I got recognized a bit. I have no delusions about my level of celebrity. I'm not Michael Jackson.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Anne says: Do you have an idol?

 Darren Hayes says:  Anne, Colby.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  TMD says: Hi Darren! Are you actively involved on the Internet?

Darren Hayes says:  TMD: I used to be.  Now I just use my laptop for checking email. I have this hell cool Mac Powerbook  with cola colored keys. It rocks! Sometimes I lurk on the website. I don't go to MIRC anymore.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  hayesbabe says: Darren are you still vegetarian?

 Darren Hayes says:  hayesbabe, no I was a vegetarian for seven years. I stopped eating meat because my body needed a break. but during tour last year I got thin and weak and when I started this album a trainer suggested I start eating white meat again and I have to say, I feel a lot better for it.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  mariet says: Did you write your new video yourself?

 Darren Hayes says:  mariet: We worked in conjunction with the Director Kevin Bray, initially, I wanted it to be a romantic piece of film and we were looking at people like Kirsten Dunst to play the person on the train. It was loosely based on "Sliding Doors."  I just love it actually.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  chowderhead says: Any advice for future artists and singers out there?

 Darren Hayes says:  chowderhead:  I say this all the time. You have to ask if you really, really want it because if you do you have to eat, breathe, sleep your dream. It¹s very competitive and it¹s mostly opportunity. Like most things in  life. The reality is different than the dream. It¹s exhaustive and I've definitely paid the price.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Parisa says: What will you be doing on New Year's Eve?

 Darren Hayes says:  Parisa, we were playing in a live concert in Sydney until the cheapskates decided they couldn't afford to pay us what we're worth.  I'll probably be at home with my family. I've never been into New Years Eve anyway. It¹s completely overrated. I also have a minor fear that it might all simultaneously explode.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Azrielle says: Hello Darren, if you could pick one favorite character from the Vampire Chronicles, who would it be?

 Darren Hayes says:  Azrielle, Louis, definitely. Although I'm probably Lestat.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  ferretdreams says: Did he see Kirsten in "interview with a vampire"?

 Darren Hayes says:  I did but believe it or not I didn't make the connection until she was on the set. Until Kirsten asked me where we got the name of the band and I just said "Oh my God you wouldn't believe it!"

 Digital Dish Diva says:  So there was good karma?

 Darren Hayes says:  Yes, definitely and Kirsten and I really connection. She's the same sign as me.

She's a Taurus. Her favorite lyric was the same as mine- the angels dance around you. It turned out that she agrees with the same spirituality as I do. I was very, very nervous because I had to hold her hand and give her a kiss.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Sparketet says: Hey, Darren what's you favorite cartoon from childhood and now?

 Darren Hayes says:  Sparketet from childhood it would be "G Force" which was an animated superhero show and "ScoobyDoo." Now it¹s "Ren and Stimpy."

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Mommy says: Do you actually write your own songs?

 Darren Hayes says:  Mommy: Daniel and I write everything

 Digital Dish Diva says:  blackjedi says: If you could choose, which video was the most fun to make?

 Darren Hayes says:  blackjedi, "The Animal Song" by far.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  SavageMelly says: How is Daniel doing? I haven't head much about him lately.

 Darren Hayes says:  Melly he's great. I have to thank everybody for being very understanding about the way he and I have shifted our roles slightly. The truth is, its always been like this. I'm more comfortable being a public figure. The two of us want to make music for you and this is our way of doing that.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  kristina says: I can't wait to see you on "TRL tomorrow." Will you be premiering "IKILY"?

 Darren Hayes says:  Kristina, I wish. No we're just rocking on out to say hello to you guys and play the video. It'll be the first time MTV plays it.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  aliendave says: Darren, are you into video games at all?

 Darren Hayes says:  aliendave: I have to confess I have really bad hand to eye coordination so I'm hideous at things like tennis and video games but I do own every "Star Wars" video game produced and yes, I'm shocking at them.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Maya14 says: Hi Darren, My Name is Maya and I'm from Israel. I woke up at 15:00am just to chat with you. When are you gonna come to Israel? You have a lot of fans here, who are waiting for a concert. I can't wait for the new album!

 Darren Hayes says:  Maya, I would love to come to Israel for historical and religious reasons. There¹s  so many places I haven't been to yet. I'd love to go to Africa, parts of Europe I haven't been to and the Middle East fascinates me. A lot of it doesn't depend on us. It¹s dollar and cents. Our last tour we spent a lot of money but we didn't care. We wanted to say thanks to all of our fans  but be patient and thanks. We're pretty much coming everywhere in the next 12 months. We've never really visited Latin America and we'll spend some time there. I'm obsessed with Brazil. IT'S ALL ABOUT BRAZIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Lianne says: What is your favorite Savage Garden song, and your favorite non-Savage Garden song?

 Darren Hayes says:  Lianne, my favorite Savage song would "Gunning Down Romance" and my favorite non-Savage song, gosh, that¹s a hard one. Probably "This Woman's Work" by Kate Bush.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Girlegirl says: Hi Darren, I think you guys rock! What was the song "To the Moon and Back" all about?

 Darren Hayes says:  Girlegirl, it was about divorce, about a dear friend of mine who had a bad experience and blamed himself for his parents divorce, teenage angst. Everyone has felt unattractive and felt they didn't fit in. This person didn't give themselves credit.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  chicacherrycola2 says: Darren, do you miss living in Australia?

 Darren Hayes says:  chica: I don't really I just miss my family. I¹m 27 and I've always lived fairly close to my family and being out of the country has given me more privacy and its let me  work myself out. I've enjoyed my time. I get lonely sometimes. I am so single and so happy about that. I was terrified to be single, I'd been in a relationship since I was 17 and never thought I could be alone, but it¹s not so bad.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Clemgrrrl says: Hi Darren! What is your favorite city you've been in and why?

 Darren Hayes says: Clemgrrrl: I think New York is definitely up there. but I love where I live at the moment, its a little town called...

 Darren Hayes says:  Ha! As if I'd tell.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Ami-chan says: What is your favourite possession?

 Darren Hayes says:  Ami-chan: Wow, that¹s a really good question. I don't think there's a single object that I value that highly. My favorite things in life have been experience of love, family, and memories.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Melena says: Darren who would be your dream woman?

 Darren Hayes says:  Melena, I had the dream woman. There is none higher.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  shesk says: How was the MTV FANatic experience?

 Darren Hayes says:  shesk, actually it was a little disappointing to be honest. Because it was so quick and you didn't really get a chance to really meet the person. I was happy that I had inspired someone and that¹s why we met that girl but I have to say we have a lot of sincere fans who aren't necessarily into us because they want to date us. They're into us because the music affects them. I've had our music played at funerals, played during chemotherapy when they lose the battle.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  slurpee_girl says: Darren, has fame changed the way your close friends and family see you?

 Darren Hayes says:  slurpee, sometimes. Fame has changed me too I'm sure. Sometimes I forget that my actions affect those around me like when I talk about my private life or using private experiences as inspirations for songs. I realize my family and friends experience that without asking for it and my family friends sometimes get a hard time. People expect them to be millionaires. Fame to me is a metaphor that God has used to teach me about myself. I think its an elaborate journey designed to give me life lessons and maybe for you to take control of your life and learn.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Aussie Dream says: The songs you write are great!!  Have you taken very many voice lessons?  Your voice is fantastic!

 Darren Hayes says: Aussie Dream, thank you very much. I never used to study voice at all. I was just a kid who used to sing in the bathroom. About half way through the tour last year I started having problems with my voice so I started seeing a voice coach and she's amazing. I think you can hear the difference. I have to tell you singing has an effect on me. I feel it in my body its' almost a religious experience. It's literally joy.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Kelly2 says: Darren, To the Moon and Back was the only reason I didn't kill myself, I want to say thank you so much for such a beautiful song, and I adore you.

 Darren Hayes says:  Kelly, I have gotten so many letters and had conversations with young girls especially with regards to that song and that¹s why I do these chats. I used to do chats to get comfort and attention but now I understand that its an important job to give people 5 minutes of peace in a chaotic world and to let you know you're not alone. I feel the things you feel. I deal in them in different ways. "Crash and Burn" is a lullaby to myself and reassurance to you saying that everybody hits rock bottom and that¹s okay. That¹s what friends are for. You pick yourself and get going. We aren't designed to be happy 100% of the time and when you accept that you see highs and lows you put all together and you have memories.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Sophie says: What did you want to be when you grew up?  Did you ever imagine you would be this famous?

 Darren Hayes says:  Sophie, I wanted to be a pop star. I didn't think of being anything else, Perhaps C3P0.. I used to think I was Michael Jackson and everybody wanted to be famous. It stemmed from insecurities and the need to be loved.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  SallySG says: Hi Darren!!  First of all I wanna thank you so much for doing this chat!  What's the biggest misconception people have about you?

 Darren Hayes says:  Sally, that I'm really serious and that I'm a complete egomaniac constantly stealing the attention from Daniel. First of all I'm an absolute zany nut case most of the time always impersonating people, things, sometimes, plants and Daniel chooses to take a step backwards all the time. If I receive more attention its actually by default sometimes also, I think sometimes that Daniel and I have tension but we adore each other. He's seriously like my brother, I love him more than you all do. He¹s the most calming, insightful, intelligent person you'll ever meet.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Lindsey says: Could we get a hint as to what "Two Beds and a Coffee Machine" is about?

 Darren Hayes says: Lindsey it¹s actually a very serious song about domestic violence. Cover your ears if you don¹t want to hear this part. The lyric is describing a motel room with two beds and a coffee machine. I won't explain too much further because I want the story to unfold when you hear the song for the first time.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  mrs_daniel_jones says: I want to know what Savage Garden plans on doinglater in life, after you leave Savage Garden or whatever. What are your future plans in life?

 Darren Hayes says:  I want to be a Dad. I might do a solo record one day and I'm interested in studying more, psychology or maybe write a novel or screenplay. Mostly I'd like to be a Dad.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  CarlaM says: I have a question for Darren: Who name's the songs, you or Daniel?

 Darren Hayes says:  Carla, I write the lyrics so I write the names of the songs, Daniel is very generous in that he lets me put my tales all over his beautiful music.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  aliendave says: What would you name your son, and what would you name a daughter?

 Darren Hayes says:  dave, I don't think I'd want to tell the world. I don't know yet, I think you know when you look your child in the eyes for the first time. I think the last time I told someone a name, they named their dog that. Hint: Daniel called his dog Jackson.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Garanwyn says: Will we be seeing you at the ARIA's?

 Darren Hayes says:  No, we'll be out of the country, unfortunately. But I think its time Australia had one without Savage Garden, even I¹m getting bored with their attendance.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Wendolyn says: When you write a song, about how long does it take you? Is it very sudden - like you're inspired to suddenly create a song, or does it take a lot of thought?

 Darren Hayes says:  Both. Some songs are written in hours, sometimes weeks. I can tell you on this album, some of the songs were brewing for six months to a year and sometimes at the studio literally at the grand piano. It just depends.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  DayDreamer says: What does the title of this album mean to you?

 Darren Hayes says:  That it's all good. That life happens. I n the end everything is okay. It¹s about acceptance and forgiveness, taking responsibility, letting go.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  crichou says: What do you think about the fans on the Internet?

 Darren Hayes says:  crichou, I love them. I love them. I had a really tough year being out of the country and being alone and to come back from that time off to see the support you don't know how amazing that feel to have a complete stranger wish you love. You have the ability to pick me up and make me feel like the luckiest man in the world so I keep taking the challenge with music to take you places you don't know you want to go to yet.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Darren, last question is from Trishabelle who says: Seeing that we are approaching the year 2000-what would you put in your time "capsule" as a keepsake from 1999?

 Darren Hayes says:  Wow, I'm very sentimental I don't know if I could pick one item, my credit card statements. I went on a plane trip from San Francisco to New York recently and I had to go over my spending for the last twelve months. Every meal, pair of socks, thumbtack they were all there. The good the bad the indifference.  That pretty much summed up the whole year. It was scary because every meal every restaurant every skip of a heartbeat.

 Digital Dish Diva says:  Darren, I know I speak for your fans in here who say thank you so very much for being with us tonight. You are truly a delight. It was a pleasure spending tonight with you. We wish you the best of luck with your new CD "Affirmation: which will be released in November.

 Darren Hayes says: I can't sum it up in one sentence but thank you from the bottom of our hearts. We love you. You make it all worthwhile. Please don't send presents. Spend the money on yourself or donate it to charity. Your sup

[maryseward666]

Which Drummer Would LARS ULRICH Choose To Replace Him In METALLICA?

RARE BLACK METAL COLLECTIBLES

METALLICA drummer Lars Ulrich was interviewed by Justin, Scott and Spiegel of the Baltimore radio station 98 Rock the day before the launch of the North American leg of the band's "WorldWired" tour. You can now watch the chat in three parts below. Asked which drummer he would name as his successor if METALLICA ever had to continue without him and he was given the opportunity to choose his replacement, Lars said: "If I could pick it, if I could hear somebody drum behind [James] Hetfield's riffs, I'd take Phil Rudd [AC/DC]. Just having his kind of vibe, like what he would do… And he's been probably my main, biggest source of inspiration when we did the turnaway from the super-progressive stuff, the crazy stuff after 'Justice', when we got into the 'Black' album and the 'Load' stuff, when it got a little more about the bounce and the riffs and the feel and the groove and all that. Phil Rudd, he's the top of that pyramid. Hearing Phil Rudd play behind James, that'd be pretty cool." Ulrich also talked about a hypothetical scenario where one of the musicians in the current lineup of METALLICA was no longer able to play with the group and his bandmates had to decide whether or not to carry on with a replacement player. Asked if METALLICA could continue without one of its core members, the drummer said: "That's one of those extra-hard questions to answer. I think a lot of it would have to be under what the circumstances were. And what I've learned along the way… I always try to speak my momentary truth, and I've said a lot of shit over the years, and a lot of stuff comes back to haunt me. But I'll always say that, at that moment, whatever I was feeling, it was my truth — it wasn't a party line or whatever. And so, if somebody leaves, it's hard for me to imagine that we would not go, 'You know, we've had a great ride for thirty-five years…' But if somebody encourages the other three guys to continue, or there's an injury… I mean, there's so many arbitrary parts of that, and I can just see the headline on Blabbermouth now: 'Lars Ulrich says METALLICA will…' Whatever. And it's not any of that. But I'm just saying you never know what the circumstances are… It's hard for me to imagine, as I sit here on May-something 2017 to think that METALLICA would continue. But you never know what the circumstances would be. It's a hard question to answer, and I just want you to know that I'm happy that I don't get asked it very much. 'Cause , as you can see, I'm just waffling along here, really. I don't really have an answer. I'm just taking up time on the radio." METALLICA guitarist Kirk Hammett confirmed in a 2015 interview with an Albany, New York radio station that the band at one point considered firing Ulrich back in 1986. The long-running rumor first gained traction in 2009 when ex-METALLICA guitarist Dave Mustaine revealed it to Rolling Stone, and surfaced again when ANTHRAX guitarist Scott Ian discussed it while doing press for his 2014 memoir, "I'm The Man: The Story Of That Guy From Anthrax". Asked about the rumor by Albany station PYX 106, Hammett revealed: "That was just an old thing, you know. I think at one point or another, we were pissed off at Lars, around maybe 1985 or something. We were unhappy and we might have grumbled something to someone. And then that person might have picked up on it and made it something a lot bigger than it actually was. To be completely honest, [Lars] has a lot of drive, and that’s a part of the reason why I love the man. His drive and his motivation is just so intense, you know." METALLICA's "Now That We're Live" live rehearsal special from M&T Bank Stadium in Baltimore streamed on Facebook Live on Tuesday night (May 9). The webcast featured the band performing four new songs from the "Hardwired... To Self-Destruct" album, while also previewing the band's new stage production. The special aired on the eve of METALLICA's first full-length North American tour in seven years, which kicks off Wednesday night (May 10) in Baltimore. The trek will hit stadiums in 25 cities before winding down in mid-August. Support on the quartet's first North American trek since 2009 will come from AVENGED SEVENFOLD, VOLBEAT and GOJIRA.

[Read More ...]

MY BLOG: http://www.rockoutwithyourcockout.com/

from Rock Out With Your Cock Out http://www.blabbermouth.net/news/which-drummer-would-lars-ulrich-choose-to-replace-him-in-metallica/ via IFTTT

[gamerzcourt]

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

New Post has been published on https://www.gamerzcourt.com/the-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-soundtrack-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggerthe-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-soundtrack-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggervideo-games-2/

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

Though Capcom’s character-action game series has always had a particular sound for its gothic-horror-aesthetic, the current game, Devil May Cry 5, features music that really goes the extra mile to get players to feel something more as they’re working their way up to SSS rank. GameSpot recently interviewed DMC5 composers Cody Matthew Johnson and husband-wife team Casey and Ali Edwards about the making of the action game’s main tracks for its cast of characters. During this talk, they spoke about their collaboration with Capcom, how the game’s energizing and dynamic soundtrack is a game-changer, and what it’s like having the internet embrace their new sound.

Editor’s Note: This interview has been edited for clarity and readability.

Can you talk about what it was like working with Capcom for this project, and how they first got in contact with you?

Casey Edwards: Funny enough, even though I ended up writing the track Devil Trigger, I got found through one of Ali’s older tracks that she did for another video game called Killer Instinct with Mick Gordon [B. Orchid’s Theme, in particular]. I actually did some work on that game as well, assisting the composer.

Ali Edwards: Yeah, it’s like they wanted both of us without knowing that we even knew each other, or that we were married at all.

Casey: Yeah, Capcom heard that particular track and they really liked the drive that it had. It really just stood out to everyone. When I wrote Devil Trigger, I pitched her as the vocalist and they just immediately fell in love with it. So, it kinda just worked out in a weird, coincidental, ironic way.

And Cody, this is actually your third collaboration with Capcom, the first being for Marvel vs Capcom: Infinite?

Cody M. Johnson: That is true. My career is still in the early stages, which is really exciting as all these things are happening. My collaborator Jeff Rona and I did three games back to back for Capcom. We didn’t really stop. We started off with Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite. Right after that came out, word got around to another development team about what we were doing, and they liked what they heard. So they came back to us. Right out of the gate I was working with Jeff, who wrote “Crimson Cloud” [V’s Theme], and I ended up writing “Subhuman” [Dante’s theme, in collaboration with Jeff Rona]. We worked on Devil May Cry 5 first, but then shortly after that, another team at Capcom hit us up to do Resident Evil 2 shortly after. So it’s been pretty exciting.

Were you fans of the series before you worked on this game?

Cody: I had played Devil May Cry 4 and the previous games a lot. I was still young enough to sneak away and play them with my friends, but it was so hard, I didn’t get very far. Even as an experienced gamer now, I’ve come back to try to play them, when I first picked up Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite–but they’re just so hard. They’re still one of the hardest games I’ve ever played to date.

Casey: I actually grew up playing Devil May Cry. So I remembered the whole Devil Trigger aspect of the game pretty vividly, and that was what was sticking out in my head as I was writing the song. I couldn’t get it out of my head and yeah, I don’t know, I just wrote it and we just went with it. I thought for sure someone from Capcom was gonna send me an email back saying, “Hey, you need to change that.”

Ali: But that didn’t happen. They all loved it.

The big line of the song, “bang, bang, bang, pull my Devil Trigger,” is such an earworm, and it feels so appropriate for the series.

Casey: Right, I remember writing that. I wrote all these lyrics in one sitting, pretty much. For that particular part, I was looking at Ali, and then I verbalized what she was about to sing.

Ali: You were so worried I was gonna hate it!

Casey: To me, that was kind of a fun phrase. I just wasn’t sure if it would latch on to the Devil May Cry fans, you know?

Last I checked, Devil Trigger has over 21 million views on YouTube. Having those earlier reservations, are you surprised to see how much it has taken off?

Casey: Well, first of all, it’s pretty freakin’ crazy. That’s a lot of plays. It kinda blows my mind a little bit. I think there might be a few factors involved in that. People have been really excited to see a continuation of [classic] Devil May Cry. I guess in the sense that you say, the song is holding its own water a little bit as well, yeah, I don’t know what to say other than it’s pretty insane that people have played the song that many times.

Ali: Yeah, it’s definitely something we didn’t expect. We were more worried that fans would hate the track, and it would become a meme. Instead, it became a meme in the best possible way.

Both of you even got to perform the song live at The Game Awards. They had Rivers Cuomo from Weezer introduce your performance.

Casey: Yeah, that was awesome. We actually got to run into Rivers after that, and it was pretty great getting to take pictures with him and nerd out. I mean gosh, yeah, I was listening to them back in high school, so that was pretty awesome. And yeah, getting to play at The Game Awards was, I mean, a dream come true. And I know it’s a relatively new awards show, but they had so many awesome people on stage, and we got to share a stage with Hans Zimmer. That’s nuts.

Ali: Yeah, that was pretty crazy, it was a blast. It was such a crazy production if you think about it. It takes a huge team to put on a production of that magnitude. It’s crazy seeing it all happen, and being a part of it, continuously.

As far as working on Devil May Cry 5, I can only imagine how much planning went into writing the tracks and getting them just write. Can you talk about what the collaborative process was like with the other composers at Capcom.

Cody: Yeah, from the very beginning, Capcom wanted, I should say, independence. They wanted to make sure each of these key tracks could exist separately from one other, but still work together within the Devil May Cry universe. We worked with Kota Suzuki [DMC5’s main composer], who actually wrote the track “Legacy,” which was in the final trailer. He was part of the development team that flew out to LA when we did the recording sessions for the bigger tracks, including “Subhuman” and “Crimson Cloud.” Other than that, Capcom didn’t really restrict us; they really wanted the score in these scenes to give identity to their characters.

Casey: When we were working with Capcom Japan, they had some clear visions for what they wanted for some of these tracks, and it was really nice getting to implement previous work I had done in the game, and getting to bring it to new light towards the end of the gaming experience.

Ali: After they heard me on “Devil Trigger,” I guess maybe that’s when they reached out for “Legacy” with me. I didn’t think was going to happen until the game was released. I wasn’t sure that was ever going to see the light of day in trailer form. And so I remember being pleasantly surprised when that came out. It’s an exciting track, it’s really beautiful, with swelling strings, and it was amazing for the fans to finally hear that. Working with Kota on that was a great experience as well.

That song really comes up at such a great moment in the game. It also highlights how different a lot of the tracks are in the game, yet they work really well when you bring it all together.

Casey: Yeah, for sure. I think that’s one thing people can get lost sometimes. They forget, “Devil Trigger,” for instance, is some weird hybrid rock pop thing, but I am also a classically trained orchestral composer and Ali does anything from soft, ethereal vocals to just mind-blowing powerful pop vocals, and stuff like that.

Ali: I started out as a jazz singer, so there’s that, too. But we got to be totally crazy with it. Working on a session musician, you can be asked to do anything, and I think your willingness to be a chameleon is really where your usability as a session musician really comes into play. The more I can become a chameleon and adhere to different genres of music, I mean, that’s why I’m being asked to work on video games. If I couldn’t do that, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to work on so many incredible games so far.

Looking back on the history of the series, Devil May Cry has this really deep focus on presenting bombastic and energizing tracks. Another game in the series that had a really eclectic soundtrack was Ninja Theory’s DmC: Devil May Cry–featuring Noisia and Combichrist. Did the style of that game have any influence on this one?

Cody: Well from the very start, everything was based on Devil May Cry 4, as in all the references they sent us. But of course, it was something I personally looked into. It’s important to understand the trajectory of all these games, where it’s been, and how the fans reacted. And you need to make a decision about where you want your art to align with. It was very conscious from the very beginning that this game is Devil May Cry 5. That was a very conscious decision, not to stay away from that version of DmC, but to separate from it, stylistically. But yeah, the combat system that matures and alters the music was something we really liked about that game.

It’s really thrilling to hear DMC5’s music evolve depending on how well you’re playing.

Cody: Yeah, It was just something we were very conscious of from the very beginning. We don’t want to leave any players behind, but we didn’t want to make it easier for players either. It’s all about challenging yourself. But the worst thing that could happen would be if the game’s music was boring. I know this as a gamer, I know this as someone who goes listens to the same 32-second track on loop for hours. It’s the worst thing in the world: You’re stuck on a level for three days, you don’t wanna be listening to the same piece of music.

We really tried to craft these songs in a way, that if you don’t hit SSS rank, you don’t ever hear the chorus or the breakdown. By doing that, those parts of the song will never get boring. The goal from the start was to incentivize the player. There is something more, you should do your absolute best to get to your SSS, and you’ll get the payoff. There should be rewards for those players that accomplish that, and I think we achieved something beyond the normal combat music.

Did you enjoy your experience working with Capcom on Devil May Cry 5?

Cody: They’ve always been happy with what we’ve done and we’re always happy to give it to ’em. They’re such an amazing collaborator, and they really care about artistic vision, and they care about what you can bring to the table, and it’s truly an amazing experience working with them.

Casey: I was super excited to work on Devil May Cry. I’ve been playing this game since Devil May Cry 1, which came out in 2001. I remember my mom taking me to Blockbuster to rent it. And then you fast forward to 2017, when I was asked to work on it, I was already so freaking pumped to get started on it. We’re classically trained and I play guitar as well in the STEM program, right? I love doing so many different things and different genres. So being asked to genre hop is one of the best things about working in the field. TV and video games and film, all alike, and one day you could be writing a solo piano piece and the next day you’re writing “Devil Trigger.”

Ali: Yeah, for me, video games have always been a pretty large part of my life. It’s always been a love of mine. So, I remember playing games with my cousins when we were all kids and it was this bonding experience for all of us. And I never would’ve imagined that I’d be working on video games today. It’s kind of crazy to think about, but I absolutely love what I do. I love being able to work on various projects across various genres and kind of become a different person for a little while. And it’s really, really humbling, seeing how the fans have accepted our work. It’s very humbling, it’s very exciting, and, all in all, we’re very grateful to be a part of the Devil May Cry family.

GameSpot – All News

[gamerzcourt]

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

New Post has been published on https://www.gamerzcourt.com/the-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-soundtrack-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggerthe-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-soundtrack-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggervideo-games/

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Soundtrack, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

Though Capcom’s character-action game series has always had a particular sound for its gothic-horror-aesthetic, the current game, Devil May Cry 5, features music that really goes the extra mile to get players to feel something more as they’re working their way up to SSS rank. GameSpot recently interviewed DMC5 composers Cody Matthew Johnson and husband-wife team Casey and Ali Edwards about the making of the action game’s main tracks for its cast of characters. During this talk, they spoke about their collaboration with Capcom, how the game’s energizing and dynamic soundtrack is a game-changer, and what it’s like having the internet embrace their new sound.

Editor’s Note: This interview has been edited for clarity and readability.

Can you talk about what it was like working with Capcom for this project, and how they first got in contact with you?

Casey Edwards: Funny enough, even though I ended up writing the track Devil Trigger, I got found through one of Ali’s older tracks that she did for another video game called Killer Instinct with Mick Gordon [B. Orchid’s Theme, in particular]. I actually did some work on that game as well, assisting the composer.

Ali Edwards: Yeah, it’s like they wanted both of us without knowing that we even knew each other, or that we were married at all.

Casey: Yeah, Capcom heard that particular track and they really liked the drive that it had. It really just stood out to everyone. When I wrote Devil Trigger, I pitched her as the vocalist and they just immediately fell in love with it. So, it kinda just worked out in a weird, coincidental, ironic way.

And Cody, this is actually your third collaboration with Capcom, the first being for Marvel vs Capcom: Infinite?

Cody M. Johnson: That is true. My career is still in the early stages, which is really exciting as all these things are happening. My collaborator Jeff Rona and I did three games back to back for Capcom. We didn’t really stop. We started off with Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite. Right after that came out, word got around to another development team about what we were doing, and they liked what they heard. So they came back to us. Right out of the gate I was working with Jeff, who wrote “Crimson Cloud” [V’s Theme], and I ended up writing “Subhuman” [Dante’s theme, in collaboration with Jeff Rona]. We worked on Devil May Cry 5 first, but then shortly after that, another team at Capcom hit us up to do Resident Evil 2 shortly after. So it’s been pretty exciting.

Were you fans of the series before you worked on this game?

Cody: I had played Devil May Cry 4 and the previous games a lot. I was still young enough to sneak away and play them with my friends, but it was so hard, I didn’t get very far. Even as an experienced gamer now, I’ve come back to try to play them, when I first picked up Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite–but they’re just so hard. They’re still one of the hardest games I’ve ever played to date.

Casey: I actually grew up playing Devil May Cry. So I remembered the whole Devil Trigger aspect of the game pretty vividly, and that was what was sticking out in my head as I was writing the song. I couldn’t get it out of my head and yeah, I don’t know, I just wrote it and we just went with it. I thought for sure someone from Capcom was gonna send me an email back saying, “Hey, you need to change that.”

Ali: But that didn’t happen. They all loved it.

The big line of the song, “bang, bang, bang, pull my Devil Trigger,” is such an earworm, and it feels so appropriate for the series.

Casey: Right, I remember writing that. I wrote all these lyrics in one sitting, pretty much. For that particular part, I was looking at Ali, and then I verbalized what she was about to sing.

Ali: You were so worried I was gonna hate it!

Casey: To me, that was kind of a fun phrase. I just wasn’t sure if it would latch on to the Devil May Cry fans, you know?

Last I checked, Devil Trigger has over 21 million views on YouTube. Having those earlier reservations, are you surprised to see how much it has taken off?

Casey: Well, first of all, it’s pretty freakin’ crazy. That’s a lot of plays. It kinda blows my mind a little bit. I think there might be a few factors involved in that. People have been really excited to see a continuation of [classic] Devil May Cry. I guess in the sense that you say, the song is holding its own water a little bit as well, yeah, I don’t know what to say other than it’s pretty insane that people have played the song that many times.

Ali: Yeah, it’s definitely something we didn’t expect. We were more worried that fans would hate the track, and it would become a meme. Instead, it became a meme in the best possible way.

Both of you even got to perform the song live at The Game Awards. They had Rivers Cuomo from Weezer introduce your performance.

Casey: Yeah, that was awesome. We actually got to run into Rivers after that, and it was pretty great getting to take pictures with him and nerd out. I mean gosh, yeah, I was listening to them back in high school, so that was pretty awesome. And yeah, getting to play at The Game Awards was, I mean, a dream come true. And I know it’s a relatively new awards show, but they had so many awesome people on stage, and we got to share a stage with Hans Zimmer. That’s nuts.

Ali: Yeah, that was pretty crazy, it was a blast. It was such a crazy production if you think about it. It takes a huge team to put on a production of that magnitude. It’s crazy seeing it all happen, and being a part of it, continuously.

As far as working on Devil May Cry 5, I can only imagine how much planning went into writing the tracks and getting them just write. Can you talk about what the collaborative process was like with the other composers at Capcom.

Cody: Yeah, from the very beginning, Capcom wanted, I should say, independence. They wanted to make sure each of these key tracks could exist separately from one other, but still work together within the Devil May Cry universe. We worked with Kota Suzuki [DMC5’s main composer], who actually wrote the track “Legacy,” which was in the final trailer. He was part of the development team that flew out to LA when we did the recording sessions for the bigger tracks, including “Subhuman” and “Crimson Cloud.” Other than that, Capcom didn’t really restrict us; they really wanted the score in these scenes to give identity to their characters.

Casey: When we were working with Capcom Japan, they had some clear visions for what they wanted for some of these tracks, and it was really nice getting to implement previous work I had done in the game, and getting to bring it to new light towards the end of the gaming experience.

Ali: After they heard me on “Devil Trigger,” I guess maybe that’s when they reached out for “Legacy” with me. I didn’t think was going to happen until the game was released. I wasn’t sure that was ever going to see the light of day in trailer form. And so I remember being pleasantly surprised when that came out. It’s an exciting track, it’s really beautiful, with swelling strings, and it was amazing for the fans to finally hear that. Working with Kota on that was a great experience as well.

That song really comes up at such a great moment in the game. It also highlights how different a lot of the tracks are in the game, yet they work really well when you bring it all together.

Casey: Yeah, for sure. I think that’s one thing people can get lost sometimes. They forget, “Devil Trigger,” for instance, is some weird hybrid rock pop thing, but I am also a classically trained orchestral composer and Ali does anything from soft, ethereal vocals to just mind-blowing powerful pop vocals, and stuff like that.

Ali: I started out as a jazz singer, so there’s that, too. But we got to be totally crazy with it. Working on a session musician, you can be asked to do anything, and I think your willingness to be a chameleon is really where your usability as a session musician really comes into play. The more I can become a chameleon and adhere to different genres of music, I mean, that’s why I’m being asked to work on video games. If I couldn’t do that, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to work on so many incredible games so far.

Looking back on the history of the series, Devil May Cry has this really deep focus on presenting bombastic and energizing tracks. Another game in the series that had a really eclectic soundtrack was Ninja Theory’s DmC: Devil May Cry–featuring Noisia and Combichrist. Did the style of that game have any influence on this one?

Cody: Well from the very start, everything was based on Devil May Cry 4, as in all the references they sent us. But of course, it was something I personally looked into. It’s important to understand the trajectory of all these games, where it’s been, and how the fans reacted. And you need to make a decision about where you want your art to align with. It was very conscious from the very beginning that this game is Devil May Cry 5. That was a very conscious decision, not to stay away from that version of DmC, but to separate from it, stylistically. But yeah, the combat system that matures and alters the music was something we really liked about that game.

It’s really thrilling to hear DMC5’s music evolve depending on how well you’re playing.

Cody: Yeah, It was just something we were very conscious of from the very beginning. We don’t want to leave any players behind, but we didn’t want to make it easier for players either. It’s all about challenging yourself. But the worst thing that could happen would be if the game’s music was boring. I know this as a gamer, I know this as someone who goes listens to the same 32-second track on loop for hours. It’s the worst thing in the world: You’re stuck on a level for three days, you don’t wanna be listening to the same piece of music.

We really tried to craft these songs in a way, that if you don’t hit SSS rank, you don’t ever hear the chorus or the breakdown. By doing that, those parts of the song will never get boring. The goal from the start was to incentivize the player. There is something more, you should do your absolute best to get to your SSS, and you’ll get the payoff. There should be rewards for those players that accomplish that, and I think we achieved something beyond the normal combat music.

Did you enjoy your experience working with Capcom on Devil May Cry 5?

Cody: They’ve always been happy with what we’ve done and we’re always happy to give it to ’em. They’re such an amazing collaborator, and they really care about artistic vision, and they care about what you can bring to the table, and it’s truly an amazing experience working with them.

Casey: I was super excited to work on Devil May Cry. I’ve been playing this game since Devil May Cry 1, which came out in 2001. I remember my mom taking me to Blockbuster to rent it. And then you fast forward to 2017, when I was asked to work on it, I was already so freaking pumped to get started on it. We’re classically trained and I play guitar as well in the STEM program, right? I love doing so many different things and different genres. So being asked to genre hop is one of the best things about working in the field. TV and video games and film, all alike, and one day you could be writing a solo piano piece and the next day you’re writing “Devil Trigger.”

Ali: Yeah, for me, video games have always been a pretty large part of my life. It’s always been a love of mine. So, I remember playing games with my cousins when we were all kids and it was this bonding experience for all of us. And I never would’ve imagined that I’d be working on video games today. It’s kind of crazy to think about, but I absolutely love what I do. I love being able to work on various projects across various genres and kind of become a different person for a little while. And it’s really, really humbling, seeing how the fans have accepted our work. It’s very humbling, it’s very exciting, and, all in all, we’re very grateful to be a part of the Devil May Cry family.

GameSpot – All News

[gamerzcourt]

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

New Post has been published on https://www.gamerzcourt.com/the-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-music-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggerthe-story-behind-devil-may-cry-5s-music-and-the-certified-banger-devil-triggervideo-games-3/

The Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil TriggerThe Story Behind Devil May Cry 5's Music, And The Certified Banger Devil Triggervideo games

Though Capcom’s action game series has always had a particular sound for its gothic-horror-aesthetic, the current game, Devil May Cry 5, features music that really goes the extra mile to get players to feel something more as they’re working their way up to SSS rank. GameSpot recently interviewed DMC5 composers Cody Matthew Johnson and husband-wife team Casey and Ali Edwards about the making of the action game’s main tracks for its cast of characters. During this talk, they spoke about their collaboration with Capcom, how the game’s energizing and dynamic soundtrack is a game-changer, and what it’s like having the internet embrace their new sound.

Editor’s Note: This interview has been edited for clarity and readability.

Can you talk about what it was like working with Capcom for this project, and how they first got in contact with you?

Casey Edwards: Funny enough, even though I ended up writing the track Devil Trigger, I got found through one of Ali’s older tracks that she did for another video game called Killer Instinct with Mick Gordon [B. Orchid’s Theme, in particular]. I actually did some work on that game as well, assisting the composer.

Ali Edwards: Yeah, it’s like they wanted both of us without knowing that we even knew each other, or that we were married at all.

Casey: Yeah, Capcom heard that particular track and they really liked the drive that it had. It really just stood out to everyone. When I wrote Devil Trigger, I pitched her as the vocalist and they just immediately fell in love with it. So, it kinda just worked out in a weird, coincidental, ironic way.

And Cody, this is actually your third collaboration with Capcom, the first being for Marvel vs Capcom: Infinite?

Cody M. Johnson: That is true. My career is still in the early stages, which is really exciting as all these things are happening. My collaborator Jeff Rona and I did three games back to back for Capcom. We didn’t really stop. We started off with Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite. Right after that came out, word got around to another development team about what we were doing, and they liked what they heard. So they came back to us. Right out of the gate I was working with Jeff, who wrote “Crimson Cloud” [V’s Theme], and I ended up writing “Subhuman” [Dante’s theme]. We worked on Devil May Cry 5 first, but then shortly after that, another team at Capcom hit us up to do Resident Evil 2 shortly after. So it’s been pretty exciting.

Were you fans of the series before you worked on this game?

Cody: I had played Devil May Cry 4 and the previous games a lot. I was still young enough to sneak away and play them with my friends, but it was so hard, I didn’t get very far. Even as an experienced gamer now, I’ve come back to try to play them, when I first picked up Marvel vs. Capcom: Infinite–but they’re just so hard. They’re still one of the hardest games I’ve ever played to date.

Casey: I actually grew up playing Devil May Cry. So I remembered the whole Devil Trigger aspect of the game pretty vividly, and that was what was sticking out in my head as I was writing the song. I couldn’t get it out of my head and yeah, I don’t know, I just wrote it and we just went with it. I thought for sure someone from Capcom was gonna send me an email back saying, “Hey, you need to change that.”

Ali: But that didn’t happen. They all loved it.

The big line of the song, “bang, bang, bang, pull my Devil Trigger,” is such an earworm, and it feels so appropriate for the series.

Casey: Right, I remember writing that. I wrote all these lyrics in one sitting, pretty much. For that particular part, I was looking at Ali, and then I verbalized what she was about to sing.

Ali: You were so worried I was gonna hate it!

Casey: To me, that was kind of a fun phrase. I just wasn’t sure if it would latch on to the Devil May Cry fans, you know?

Last I checked, Devil Trigger has over 21 million views on YouTube. Having those earlier reservations, are you surprised to see how much it has taken off?

Casey: Well, first of all, it’s pretty freakin’ crazy. That’s a lot of plays. It kinda blows my mind a little bit. I think there might be a few factors involved in that. People have been really excited to see a continuation of [classic] Devil May Cry. I guess in the sense that you say, the song is holding its own water a little bit as well, yeah, I don’t know what to say other than it’s pretty insane that people have played the song that many times.

Ali: Yeah, it’s definitely something we didn’t expect. We were more worried that fans would hate the track, and it would become a meme. Instead, it became a meme in the best possible way.

Both of you even got to perform the song live at The Game Awards. They had Rivers Cuomo from Weezer introduce your performance.

Casey: Yeah, that was awesome. We actually got to run into Rivers after that, and it was pretty great getting to take pictures with him and nerd out. I mean gosh, yeah, I was listening to them back in high school, so that was pretty awesome. And yeah, getting to play at The Game Awards was, I mean, a dream come true. And I know it’s a relatively new awards show, but they had so many awesome people on stage, and we got to share a stage with Hans Zimmer. That’s nuts.

Ali: Yeah, that was pretty crazy, it was a blast. It was such a crazy production if you think about it. It takes a huge team to put on a production of that magnitude. It’s crazy seeing it all happen, and being a part of it, continuously.

As far as working on Devil May Cry 5, I can only imagine how much planning went into writing the tracks and getting them just write. Can you talk about what the collaborative process was like with the other composers at Capcom.

Cody: Yeah, from the very beginning, Capcom wanted, I should say, independence. They wanted to make sure each of these key tracks could exist separately from one other, but still work together within the Devil May Cry universe. We worked with Kota Suzuki [DMC5’s main composer], who actually wrote the track “Legacy,” which was in the final trailer. He was part of the development team that flew out to LA when we did the recording sessions for the bigger tracks, including “Subhuman” and “Crimson Cloud.” Other than that, Capcom didn’t really restrict us; they really wanted the score in these scenes to give identity to their characters.

Casey: When we were working with Capcom Japan, they had some clear visions for what they wanted for some of these tracks, and it was really nice getting to implement previous work I had done in the game, and getting to bring it to new light towards the end of the gaming experience.

Ali: After they heard me on “Devil Trigger,” I guess maybe that’s when they reached out for “Legacy” with me. I didn’t think was going to happen until the game was released. I wasn’t sure that was ever going to see the light of day in trailer form. And so I remember being pleasantly surprised when that came out. It’s an exciting track, it’s really beautiful, with swelling strings, and it was amazing for the fans to finally hear that. Working with Kota on that was a great experience as well.

That song really comes up at such a great moment in the game. It also highlights how different a lot of the tracks are in the game, yet they work really well when you bring it all together.

Casey: Yeah, for sure. I think that’s one thing people can get lost sometimes. They forget, “Devil Trigger,” for instance, is some weird hybrid rock pop thing, but I am also a classically trained orchestral composer and Ali does anything from soft, ethereal vocals to just mind-blowing powerful pop vocals, and stuff like that.

Ali: I started out as a jazz singer, so there’s that, too. But we got to be totally crazy with it. Working on a session musician, you can be asked to do anything, and I think your willingness to be a chameleon is really where your usability as a session musician really comes into play. The more I can become a chameleon and adhere to different genres of music, I mean, that’s why I’m being asked to work on video games. If I couldn’t do that, I wouldn’t have had the opportunity to work on so many incredible games so far.

Looking back on the history of the series, Devil May Cry has this really deep focus on presenting bombastic and energizing tracks. Another game in the series that had a really eclectic soundtrack was Ninja Theory’s DmC: Devil May Cry–featuring Noisia and Combichrist. Did the style of that game have any influence on this one?

Cody: Well from the very start, everything was based on Devil May Cry 4, as in all the references they sent us. But of course, it was something I personally looked into. It’s important to understand the trajectory of all these games, where it’s been, and how the fans reacted. And you need to make a decision about where you want your art to align with. It was very conscious from the very beginning that this game is Devil May Cry 5. That was a very conscious decision, not to stay away from that version of DmC, but to separate from it, stylistically. But yeah, the combat system that matures and alters the music was something we really liked about that game.

It’s really thrilling to hear DMC5’s music evolve depending on how well you’re playing.

Cody: Yeah, It was just something we were very conscious of from the very beginning. We don’t want to leave any players behind, but we didn’t want to make it easier for players either. It’s all about challenging yourself. But the worst thing that could happen would be if the game’s music was boring. I know this as a gamer, I know this as someone who goes listens to the same 32-second track on loop for hours. It’s the worst thing in the world: You’re stuck on a level for three days, you don’t wanna be listening to the same piece of music.

We really tried to craft these songs in a way, that if you don’t hit SSS rank, you don’t ever hear the chorus or the breakdown. By doing that, those parts of the song will never get boring. The goal from the start was to incentivize the player. There is something more, you should do your absolute best to get to your SSS, and you’ll get the payoff. There should be rewards for those players that accomplish that, and I think we achieved something beyond the normal combat music.

Did you enjoy your experience working with Capcom on Devil May Cry 5?

Cody: They’ve always been happy with what we’ve done and we’re always happy to give it to ’em. They’re such an amazing collaborator, and they really care about artistic vision, and they care about what you can bring to the table, and it’s truly an amazing experience working with them.

Casey: I was super excited to work on Devil May Cry. I’ve been playing this game since Devil May Cry 1, which came out in 2001. I remember my mom taking me to Blockbuster to rent it. And then you fast forward to 2017, when I was asked to work on it, I was already so freaking pumped to get started on it. We’re classically trained and I play guitar as well in the STEM program, right? I love doing so many different things and different genres. So being asked to genre hop is one of the best things about working in the field. TV and video games and film, all alike, and one day you could be writing a solo piano piece and the next day you’re writing “Devil Trigger.”

Ali: Yeah, for me, video games have always been a pretty large part of my life. It’s always been a love of mine. So, I remember playing games with my cousins when we were all kids and it was this bonding experience for all of us. And I never would’ve imagined that I’d be working on video games today. It’s kind of crazy to think about, but I absolutely love what I do. I love being able to work on various projects across various genres and kind of become a different person for a little while. And it’s really, really humbling, seeing how the fans have accepted our work. It’s very humbling, it’s very exciting, and, all in all, we’re very grateful to be a part of the Devil May Cry family.

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