#like what does that even mean. what am i supposed to gather from that

[bitterreid]

🐛 Choose the latter, choose the latter 🐛

Summary: Your dad has a fondness for vintage cars. You have a fondness for his mechanic. A collection of times you run into Hawkins' resident freak-turned-car-mechanic and can't seem to stay away from him.

Wordcount: 4.1k (fluff/smut)

Contains: fem!reader x mechanic!Eddie, teasingggg, oral (m receiving), dirty talk, eddie being down bad, incorrect car facts probably, woops 

A/N: This came to me in a vision, def let me know if anyone wants a part two because I loved making this and I have more ideas for this pairing, title is from Finn's song which is a BANGER, also, am I developing a mechanic kink? Is that a thing? Does anyone else share this? It's starting to become a problem lol

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"You sure you need me today, Wayne? It's like, 700 degrees out." Eddie simply did not care enough to conceal the whining tone in his voice, already feeling the way his clothes stuck to his skin. 

"Stop complaining and be grateful you got a job at all, kid." Wayne tossed over his shoulder, used to Eddie's constant chatter by now.

"No, of course, yeah, yeah, but you see this? The soles of my shoes are melting into the pavement," Eddie clumsily put his foot in the air - soles completely intact - to show Wayne, who did not turn around. 

Slightly begrudged, Eddie continued his sulking pace. Not that he really minded his job, after all.

"Remember," Wayne said as he pushed the big doors to the garage open, "I need you to be on your best behaviour today. No antics, you get me?"

"Oh I got you," Eddie quips absentmindedly, too taken aback by the legion of vintage cars that awaited them. "These are all property of your supposed childhood friend? What is he? A mob boss or something?"

Wayne rolled his eyes, "Just a businessman, Eddie, and I mean it, no standing around either, he's been a customer for almost twenty years now, and I'd like to keep it that way. I even held his daughter when she was a baby, this is not someone you want to disappoint."

But Eddie was lost in the shiny contours of the expensive cars, trying to calculate just how much cash was gathered in this room alone. 

"Oh and make sure to keep an eye out for the neighbourhood kids, they like to sneak looks inside, so don't let them in, understand?" Wayne got no answer, "Eddie?"

"Yeah, yeah, let no one in, I'm not a toddler you leave home alone for the first time I'll be fine." He waved Wayne away, perusing through the rows of cars.

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Half way through the day, the first kids popped up at the large doors. At first Eddie just heard giggles, then whispers, then he saw three little heads poke through the doorway, eyes twinkling in the bright sunlight.

"No, nu-uh, out, you three!" He felt like an old man yelling for children to get off his lawn. But it worked, the kids scurried away again, giggling and screeching in the process.

Eddie wiped the sweat off his brow, again, as he had done every ten minutes since he had gotten here. He was eternally grateful for the faint breeze every once in a while, but the white tank top he was donning was - besides smeared with oil - now also almost drenched. Great. Just as he was about to bend back over the 1957 Porsche, he heard more footsteps approaching. Wayne had left to go get them some lunch in the supermarket down the street, leaving Eddie to deal with the greedy little onlookers all on his own, but he was getting tired of scaring them away.

"Just go already! How many more times do I-" his tirade halted when he turned around to find you. Huh, he thought, okay, not the normal crowd, but he wasn't one to judge. "Um, sorry, you can't be in here."

You cocked your head at him, cherry lollypop between your lips, your summer dress faintly blowing in the wind. "I can't?"

Eddie was somewhat taken aback. "This is private property" was his lame response, which even sounded unconvincing to his own ears.

"Is that so?" you replied idly, stalking forward and running your fingers over the hood of one of the cars. 

Eddie surged forward, "Hey! You can't just-" he grabbed your wrist, not hard, just to keep you away from the precious cars left in his care. All you did was smile up at him, completely unbothered.

Eddie was stunned, like all the files in his mind had been corrupted, and in pure desperation threw it back onto the old guy lecturing kids, "Listen here, missy," (missy, really, Eddie?) "You can't just barge in here, okay? I'm gonna need to ask you to leave, respectfully."

The cheshire cat grin on your face only grew at his words, "Ooh, respectfully? Well, if you ask so nicely…" Your tone was teasing, all drawn-out and suspiciously sweet. "I guess I'll see you around, then…"

"Eddie," he supplied, partly against his better judgement.

"See ya, Eddie." And then you were gone.

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"Wayne, I already know what you're going to say, but can I test-drive one of these babies?" Eddie harboured no hopes that the answer would be yes - ever - but daydreaming never hurt anyone.

All he got back from his uncle was a deadpan stare and a raised brow.

"Right, right." 

I was the next day, still doing check-ups on the cars, whose drivers' seats seemed to glint alluringly at him every time he popped their hoods. 

"Did I tell you about that girl who came by yesterday? That was weird,"

"Eddie. You've told me several times now, I think I get it." Wayne was changing the oil on one of the Ferrari's, wondering for the umpteenth time why, again, he had hired his own nephew?  

"Oh, right. Right." Eddie couldn't seem to get you out of his head, the way you had been so unfazed, your eyes trained on him the whole time, there was an undeniable pull towards the idea of you. See you around, you had said. Faintly, somewhere, Eddie hoped it was true. 

And it was.

Around noon, once again, you appeared in the door opening, this time with a different coloured lollypop and a dog circling your feet. Eddie took in the sight of you, radiant in the contrasting light of the doorway, but it wasn't him you were looking at.

"Mister Munson!" you exclaimed, a bright, honest smile taking over your features.

"Sweetheart, hey, how you been?" Wayne wiped his hands on a rag and came over to you, smiling almost affectionately.

"Not too bad, just making sure I don't melt, you know, in this weather. How about you? I see you brought help this year?"

"I'm good, honey, thanks, yeah, this is my nephew, Eddie." he gestured vaguely in Eddie's direction.

"Nice to meet you, Eddie," your smile was coy and well-practiced, with a glint of mischief behind your eyes that Wayne didn't seem to notice at all when he tumbled into a slew of questions, keeping you entertained. 

 "Tell me, how's your father, how are you finding college? Are you home all summer?" 

Eddie was gobsmacked. Could it be that he had commanded you to leave your own garage? Your own house? Oh how he wished the floor would grow teeth and swallow him right about now. Instead, he busied himself with polishing the same mirror roughly eleven times over, not so subtly eavesdropping on your conversation. 

"So, I'll be heading off now, gotta take this one out for a walk," you scratched the dog behind her ear, "See you later, Mr. Munson," you looked over your shoulder, smiling sweetly "and bye, Eddie." All Eddie could muster was an impressively fake smile until you rounded the corner.

"Wayne!!" Eddie exclaimed, throwing his dirty rag at his uncle, "what the fuck??"

"Hey!" Wayne scrambled to swat the rag away, "what now-"

"That's the girl! The girl that came by! The girl that I sent away!"

Wayne could hardly suppress his smile, "You sent the daughter of the owner away? Nice, Ed, real classy."

Eddie raised his hands in desperation, "You said his daughter was a baby!"

"Boy, I said I held her as a baby! Years ago! That's what you get for never listening to me," Wayne snickered.

Eddie groaned, burying his face in his hands. "I called her missy."

At that, Wayne couldn't help but properly burst out laughing, "Missy?! Well, you have only yourself for that one, don't ya?" This earned him another rag to his face.

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That afternoon, heat almost unbearable in the garage, Wayne had a plan.

"Eddie, fetch some water, will ya?"

"Water, from where? The store?"

"Nope," Wayne answered, barely looking up from the screw he was fastening, "the kitchen."

Eddie stood up straight, "The kitchen? You're kidding me."

"Nope."

"Why do you want to punish me, Wayne?"

"Boy, it's just some water, go fetch."

"I'm not a dog," Eddie mumbled as he wiped his hands and attempted to fix his untamed curls in the reflection of one of the windows. He stalked out of the garage and rounded the corner into your backyard. They had been given permission to help themselves to anything they needed, but normally Eddie made Wayde grab him stuff. Not that he was scared of you, or anything.

He climbed up the steps to your backdoor, looking down at his oil-smeared outfit that clashed starkly with the light blue kitchen tiles coming into view. If he was lucky, he would be in and out before anyone noticed him. He just had to find the cabinet you kept your cups in and get some water and he'd be a free man. Only, which cabinet?

This kitchen was about seven times as big as his own, with about seven times as many cabinets, which made the guess, somewhat… impossible. So he started opening doors, and shutting them as silently as possible after the so manieth cupboard of only decorative plates. (How many decorative plates could one family need?)

He was almost getting desperate, nearing the end of the row of doors, thinking maybe fancy people didn't use cups? Until he finally found them, shiny and sparkling. He grabbed the first one he saw, finally turning around towards the tap and-

"Jesus- oh my god, what the-" You were smiling at him from the other side of the room, languidly draped against the doorframe.

You cleared your throat, putting on fake wide eyes, "Um, sorry, you can't be in here."

"I, um, I just needed to get some wat-" he barely managed.

"This is private property" you mocked, a smile seeping through your tone. The twinkle in your eyes was what finally betrayed your agenda to him.

"Ahh, ha ha, real clever, I get it." he turned the glass over in his hands, trying to will his nerves away.

"Took you long enough," you chirped, pushing yourself off the doorpost and strolling towards him. "Thirsty?"

"Yeah, um, no, it's, it's for Wayne," could he sound any more like a middle schooler that got caught red-handed?

"Aah, then you'd want this," you said, pulling open the doors of your giant refrigerator and producing a bottle of sparkling water, "he likes this one the best." 

Eddie had never seen the drink before, probably too fancy to keep around in the trailer, "Thanks," he mumbled, taking the blue bottle from you.

"No worries," you started backing away into the doorframe you had come from again, while Eddie grew faintly more aware of a feeling blooming in his chest that somehow wanted you to stay. "Just, yell if you need anything else, alright?" 

And then you were gone. Again. The smile on your lips lingered in Eddie's mind for longer than he'd care to admit.

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The next day, Eddie was determined to strike up a real conversation with you. Preferably one where he didn't scold you like a mean teacher or came off extremely clueless, if possible. But the day rolled by, and no sign of you. He even volunteered to get more water in the kitchen, hoping to run into you, but to no avail.

He had all but lost hope, until he spotted you in the garden. You were sitting at the far end, reading a book at a picnic table underneath a wooden arch covered in flowers. You were a vision, in your short shorts and the soft sunlight on your face, you could have stepped into any of those mushy romance movies Eddie pretended not to like. 

"Hey, Wayne, you go ahead and leave without me, alright?" Eddie said, hoping to sound casual.

Wayne glanced up from packing his things, inquisitively at first, but then he spotted you. "Sure, kid. Just one word of advice-"

Eddie groaned in anticipation of the words to come.

"Don't call her missy, alright?" a grin taking over his face.

"Yeah, yeah, thanks, I'll try for sure." Eddie rushed away from his uncle, checking his appearance one more time in one the windows of a particularly shiny Mustang. He looked like he just worked an entire day in unbearable heat, which he did, so at least that checked out, but it would have to do. He slowed his walk, tried his best for casual, and strolled up to you in your large, well-kept garden.

"Hey there," he said, alerting you of his presence, and slid onto the bench opposite you.

You looked up from your book, not startled at all, Eddie noted, and smiled at him, "Hi." 

Eddie smiled back, already scrambling for words, swallowing hard at the sight of you, framed inside a border of roses.

But conversation seemed to come easily to you. "So, which of the cars have you been dreaming of stealing the most?"

Eddie let out a surprised laugh at that.

"I bet it was the red Porsche, or the Black Corvette?" You raised your eyebrow, "or are you more of a convertible type, Eddie?" 

"Aah, you got me," he threw his hands up in surrender.

"Hmh, then I bet you'd like, the dark green one," you snapped your fingers, "the uh, um, what's it called?" 

"The 1955 Ford Thunderbird, with the 312 cubic inch Y-block V8 motor," Eddie blurted out, too enamoured with the car to curb his enthusiasm. 

"That's right," your smile widened, "See, I got you all figured out."

Oh, Eddie was in looooveee. And very much unable to play anything cool, ever, though he was willing to die trying. "And you? Any favourites you'd run away with?"

"Oh, I'm not really a car kinda girl, only really know what my dad tells me about them."

"Oh really? But I bet you have a favourite, right?" He was trying to throw all of his charm in the ring.

"Hmm," you pondered his question, "I guess I have a soft sport for the Porsche, the light blue one?" 

"The 911 T? Good choice, good choice, a lady with taste."

You laughed at that, "Yeah, you know how cars kind of have a face?"

"I, um, I can't say I do?" but he was intrigued by where this was going.

"Yeah you do, the headlights are the eyes, the bumper is the mouth, and that one just looks, kind? I don't know," your laugh was getting bashful now, almost shy, "Maybe I'm talking nonsense."

"No! No, I see it, sure, you're right, even, very friendly car. Real sweetheart." You swatted at his arm, only making his lopsided grin more fond. "No, I mean it, didn't even give me any trouble during its check-up."

"Isn't it exhausting, all these long days in this heat?" You asked.

"Eh," Eddie waved his fingers, "had better days, but it's alright, honest work, you know."

You nodded, "Seems like hard work… you must be tired." Your eyes were flicking over his body now, but your smile remained kind and compassionate.

"I mean, well, yeah, kinda…" Eddie was slowly getting flustered by your attention.

"Working with your hands all day, can't be easy…" you trailed off, fidgeting with the edge of your book, "You know, I admire that, the craft, I mean." You slowly stood up, abandoning your book and walking around the table.

Eddie swallowed hard, trying to stay cool and collected, as he couldn't tell where this was going for the life of him. 

You came to a halt behind Eddie, still musing aloud, "Not afraid to get your hands dirty, and, you have to be quite strong… right?" 

You trailed your fingertips over his exposed upper arm, just like how you had done to the car a few days ago, but this time, Eddie didn't stop you. Instead, he inhaled sharply, tracking your movements with his eyes. 

"Right, Eddie? I bet you're really strong, carrying all those things, lifting the tires…" You bent down, your face nearing his ear, to whisper, "I bet you work really hard, Eddie, and I think- " your lips grazed the shell of his ear and Eddie thought he might faint on the spot, "I think you deserve a reward for that."

Eddie felt a shiver run down his spine at your words, his eyelids fluttering to stay open. Your hands were on his shoulders now, while your lips dragged over the hot skin of his neck. Sparks ignited all over his body upon the soft contact, rendering him speechless.

"Right, Eddie? Don't you think you deserve to be spoiled a little? For all your hard work?" You planted small kisses all over his neck, and when his head tipped back - involuntarily - you moved on to the column of his throat. Not satisfied with his lack of response, you purred his name again, "Eddie?", which poured oil on the flames igniting in his belly.

"Y- yeah, I do." His voice was hoarse, even to his own ears.

You smiled against his skin, satisfied with his reply, "That's right, so do you want me to take care of you, Eddie? Spoil you? Hmm?" Your voice was velvet to the touch, the words curling around him in an intoxicating spiral.

"Yeah, yeah, I- I do," his mumbling was interrupted by a low groan that left his throat as you planted hot, open mouthed kisses on his jaw. He was pretty sure he was in heaven.

"Turn around then," was all you said, and Eddie couldn't obey you any faster, swinging his legs over the bench to face you, no doubt red-cheeked and with dazed eyes. And you, you were a vision. So innocent looking, just standing there with your sweet smile and your gorgeous legs, looking at him, of all people. 

Then, you slowly, ever so slowly, got on your knees in front of him. And oh god. Eddie thought he might lose it, might wake up from this daydream, might get told this was all a cruel joke, but the way you held his eyes as you sank down, this was his ultimate wet dream come true right before his eyes. He swallowed, by lack of anything else to do, as 'casual' had gone out the window a long time ago. 

You looked so pretty sitting in between his spread legs, Eddie almost felt the need to stop you right there and ask to take a picture. But he didn't, because you were reaching your hands up to his belt now, carefully unbuckling it. The metal sounds of the clasps sounded out of place between the twittering birds in your garden, but Eddie couldn't care less, so entirely enveloped by your gentle stare and careful hands.

"May I, Eddie?" you asked, voice still as sweet as ever.

All he could do was nod, vigorously, and lift his hips to help you slide his jeans down his legs. He was hard. Of course he was, who could blame him? He had been living out his own personal wildest fantasies for the last ten minutes. 

His breath hitched once more when your lips got closer to his length, but instead you attacked his thighs, planting sweet, soft kisses on the pale skin there. You were driving him wild, insane, mad, deranged, you name it. All of it the work of your plush lips on his skin.

Suddenly, a clear thought made its way through the fog in his brain "W- what about your parents?" There was a clear wobble to his voice, but he was under strict instructions from Wayne not to screw this up. 

You laughed a little, maybe at his question, maybe at his disheleveld state, "Out of town, Eddie, don't worry." 

"Oh," he swallowed thickly, "right, yeah. Neighbours?" 

"What neighbours?" you giggled, as indeed, your house was located far away from the rest of the town.

"Right, right," he couldn't think straight with your lips so close to his aching dick that was straining his boxers by now. 

You smoothed your hands up and down his legs, "Relax, Eddie, lay back, let me take care of you, yeah?"

"Yeah, yeah…" he tried to chill, but the mix of nerves, butterflies and arousal in his stomach was a hard one to swallow. All of his efforts, though, went completely out the window as soon as you grabbed his dick through the fabric. A sinful, drawn out moan immediately escaped his lips upon the first experimental stroke you gave.

You giggled quietly, a matching heat catching on your cheeks as you leaned forwards and licked his leaking tip through his boxers. Another sound escaped him, and he was sure by now his mouth was hanging open, bewitched by the (un)holy sight before him.

"You like that, Eddie?" you purred, slowly working his dick over.

"Y- yeah, oh fuck, yeah."

"Good," you said as you finally hooked your fingers behind the waistband, pulling his boxers down. "Be as loud as you want, by the way, I think it's really hot."

The compliment, paired with the casual way you said it, made the burn on Eddie's cheeks even brighter, the blush now creeping down his chest as well. You looked absolutely angelic, and yet absolutely sinful, the way your beautiful face was framed between his thighs now, and your delicate hand wrapped around his dick. 

When you licked up his shaft for the first time, fire sparked right through his entire body, igniting something stronger, deeper, than he had ever felt before. Your tongue wrapped around his head next, while it glided between your soft, plush lips. Eddie was so gone, groaning in pleasure with every stroke. 

You worked up a steady rhythm, your mouth as warm and intoxicating as your touch. The way you looked up at him, all innocent and pretty, made Eddie's insides swoop, drawing a high-pitched whine from his which he didn't know he was capable of. 

His eyes wanted to roll back into his skull, but he fought to keep them open, not wanting to miss a single second. He carefully weaved his fingers through your hair, not so much steering you as just going along with your movements, craving more contact. "This okay?" he asked, voice raspy and deep.

You hummed around his dick, sending shivers of pleasure through Eddie's body. He was sure you'd be the death of him. 

Eddie was getting closer, though he tried to hold off from finishing for as long as possible, both to save his ego and to savour every last second of this moment. But your skilled movements and honestly just the mere sight of you kneeled between his legs alone made it extremely hard on him. 

His moans became breathier, and he knew that he was getting close. His heart was pounding in his chest, the muscles in his abdomen were flexing tight, and pleasure was clouding his brain to the point that the only thing that existed in the whole universe for him were you, and the way you looked, and felt around him.

"Fuck, fuck, sweetheart," he moaned the words rather than said them, "Oh, fuck, I'm so- so close." But you didn't stop. On the contrary, you kept going, even faster, sucking the head exactly the way he liked it. "Oh god, jesus, fuck," all kinds of profanities tumbled from his lips, feeling his high rapidly approaching. You looked up at him one final time, your big eyes locking onto his, and that's what did him in.

His orgasm crashed over him in burning, white- hot waves of pleasure, making him moan out your name over and over as he finished. His hands were still in your hair, feeling the way you carefully worked him through his high. When he opened his eyes again, he saw you wipe your mouth, a satisfied smile on your face.

Eddie was still beyond dishevelled, completely out of it, you name it. He watched you with wide eyes and pink cheeks as he caught his breath, still half in disbelief about what just happened. 

You licked your lips, still kneeling before him, "Was that good?" 

"Good? Good?" (Eddie's brain had stopped working like half an hour ago) "Sweetheart, 'good' would be the understatement of the century." He brushed your hair behind your ear, "That was, fuck, that was like, the best moment of my life." 

You laughed at that, finally standing up and dusting off your knees, "Ah, don't flatter me, Munson." Your smile was bright and warm, and Eddie found himself in deep, deep trouble. 

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I am but a humble fanfic writer and i beg for your feedback guys :))))))) xxxxxxxx + If anyone has requests, tell meeeee, and lmk if I should make this a series :))))

[tobiasdrake]

Digimon Adventure 02x31 - Sylphimon, the Storm of Love / Opposites Attract

Previously on Digimon Adventure: Team Rocket created Mewtwo and unleashed him upon us. Iori was hostile to Ken until he agreed to leave but then Miyako fixed the problem by hitting Ken until he agreed to come back. Nothing was accomplished and no one was helped.

We open in the Digital World, deep in the woods. Digimon are out and about enjoying their lives. A bunch of Numemon are hiding in bushes. Elecmon is out taking care of the babies. There's even a Unimon.

But then, suddenly, they hear it. Heavy armored footfalls approaching. The Digimon scatter. The Numemon pull down their eyestalks to conceal themselves. Elecmon shepherds the babies away. Unimon gallops off. No one wants to be here for what's coming.

As BlackWarGreymon cuts down a pair of trees in his path and steps into the area, the only sound is a strange chattering noise. He looks up to see a frightened Kuwagamon clinging to a tree, trying their hardest not to be noticed and faillng miserably due to their teeth chattering.

But this Kuwagamon is unworthy of BlackWarGreymon's attention, so he presses on.

This is an incredibly quiet and tense scene in the original. The dub gives it a larger soundscape. There's scary bad times BGM playing, the Digimon gasp audibly, and there's effects for both the slicing and the falling of trees. Kuwagamon gets dialogue.

Kuwagamon: Ooogh, I'm invisible! I'm not here! You don't see me! Owohwohwohwohwohwohwohwohwohwohwohwohwoh....

This is in lieu of the fact that Kuwagamon does not speak in the original and, in fact, is not a species of Digimon that talks at all.

Now that we're up to speed with him, what's up with our deadly duo?

Arachnemon and Mummymon are in the car tracking BlackWarGreymon's movement in the Digital World.

Mummymon: Wherever he goes, he leaves a phase distortion in his wake. If we follow that, we'll find him. Arachnemon: Where the hell is he trying to go!? Mummymon: Well, if we knew that, there wouldn't be a problem. Arachnemon: Why are you so calm about this!? Speed up! Mummymon: (sigh) ...yes, ma'am.

At Arachnemon's command, Mummymon picks up the pace.

In the dub:

Mummymon: We should be able to track BlackWarGreymon by following the spatial disruption. He won't elude you, my sweet! Arukenimon: You had better be right, Mummymon. And don't call me that! Mummymon: I am your eternal slave, my dear. Whatever you wish. Arukenimon: You're pathetic. Speed up! I'm growing weary of you! Mummymon: Yes, Pumpkin!

The dub's having fun with Mummymon's unrequited feelings. It still hits the key point about them tracking the distortion, but it's a little awkward. It's the presentation.

The original says that BWG is creating some sort of distortion in his wake and they're tracking that. The dub says we're tracking him by following the spatial disruption as if we're already supposed to know what that means.

This is a minor point and it's a confusing piece of technobabble either way, but the original phrasing is less likely too leave you stopping and going, "Wait, what spatial disruption? What's a spatial disruption?"

In the human world, another day of elementary school comes to a close. The Chosen Children gather in computer club to discuss the royal shitstomp they definitely all died from but then fortunately got to pop 1-Ups between episodes.

Takeru: BlackWarGreymon.... Daisuke: Even Paildramon couldn't defeat him.... Tailmon: We were up against an Ultimate Digimon. There's nothing we could do. Even if I could reach Perfect, we'd still be no match for him. Takeru: If we just had two-- No, even one more Jogress Evolution we could pull off, then we might stand more of a chance against him. Chibimon: You guys need to hurry up and Jogress already. Daisuke: You need to drop the attitude. Chibimon: Nah. Ahahahahaha! Patamon: But who are our partners? Poromon: If we knew that, we could at least practice. Upamon: That's right-dagyaa! Tailmon: It would have to be someone here.... Poromon: Here...? Patamon: Someone....

It's a good question. Are we going girl-girl and boy-boy with Hikari/Miyako and Takeru/Iori? Or are we going bestie-bestie with Miyako/Iori and Hikari/Takeru? Both of these are entirely conceivable. Though it might be a little awkward if we end up going Miyako/Takeru and Hikari/Iori.

Again, I want the franchise to stop being lazy and give us alternative Jogress forms already. >.< I don't care if they aren't canon! Neither is Ponchomon but we still have that!

In the dub:

T.K.: We needed this like a hole in the head. Davis: I think that's exactly BlackWarGreymon's plan. Gatomon: If he even looks at Kari the wrong way, I'll put a hole in his head! I don't care if he is a Mega!

The dub seems unaware that we already fought BlackWarGreymon and got our teeth kicked in.

T.K.: Very courageous but crazy. Even if you could evolve to Ultimate which, let me remind you, you can't, he's TOO POWERFUL!!! DemiVeemon: If the rest of you could DNA Digivolve, he'd be toast! Davis: Think you could have more of an attitude, little guy? DemiVeemon: Nuh-uh! Hahahahaha! Patamon: How rude, but he's right. We're useless. Poromon: Maybe we could practice but who with? Upamon: Yeah, who's my partner? Gatomon: Hmm, good question... You're all so young and inexperienced. Poromon: But we'll learn quick.... Patamon: You'll have to.

We're all inexperienced when it comes to DNA Digivolving, Gatomon. It's a brand new concept.

In the original, Takeru is the one holding onto hope and saying that we might have a chance if the rest of the team can Jogress. The dub makes him a party pooper criticizing Gatomon for thinking she could ever compete with BWG, then has DemiVeemon overconfidently be the one to assert that more DNA Digivolutions are the answer - albeit in a flippant way that's more of a dig against them.

Overall, the tone is a lot more negative. The dub kids don't feel like they're confidently trying to work through the problem the way the original kids are.

While the Digimon are thinking about Jogress, the conversation moves on to BlackWarGreymon himself.

Miyako: That being said, he's even blowing off that spider woman's group. Iori: That just proves he's not an opponent we can go after with a piece of rope. Hikari: Where could he be going? All by himself, no less....

Real quick, rope is a simple and useful tool that can be applied to all kinds of situations to make an easy and effective solution. To that end, the phrase "一筋縄では行かない Hitosujinawa de wa ikanai" or "I can't go at it with a piece of rope" came to describe abnormally complex and difficult tasks with no easy answer.

Anyways, Hikari suddenly speaks up from offscreen, where she's been all this time. While we've been chatting about Jogress, Hikari's been staring out the window in a depressed funk. But now that she's sharing what's on her mind, everyone shuts up and pays her all of their attention.

Hikari: BlackWarGreymon... A Digimon who seems to have been born only to fight. Team: ... Miyako: Hikari-chan... are you worried about BlackWarGreymon? Hikari: It's not quite like that.... Daisuke: Hikari-chan is kind, unlike you, Miyako. Miyako: Hey! What's that supposed to mean!? Daisuke: What's what mean!? Takeru: (breaking it up) Okay, okay. In any case, let's get to the Digital World. We can't let them create another Digimon like that again. Daisuke: Yeah! We'll smash those Dark Towers before they know what hit 'em! Right, Hikari-chan? Hikari: Sure....

Hikari answers positively but her heart isn't in it. Daisuke accepts it and Chibimon hops up onto his arm with excitement.

Chibimon: Let's go, Daisuke! Daisuke: Yeah!

But Miyako sees through it. As we transition to the Digital World, Miyako thinks to herself about Hikari while creepily staring at her.

Miyako: (thinking) Yeah, I'm nothing like Hikari-chan. She carries so many things inside her heart. So much that, sometimes, I have no way of knowing what's going through her head.

Right now, what's going through her head is, "Uhhhh, why is she staring at me so intensely? She's been doing that for half an hour. She knows I can tell she's doing it, right? Is she trying to intimidate me? Am I her latest crush? What is this? Okay, just ignore it and maybe it will go away."

Miyako, you really need to master the art of the "You can move your eyes, just don't turn your head" maneuver.

In the dub:

Yolei: I can't believe BlackWarGreymon dissed Arukenimon like that. Not that I blame him. Cody: I think she was as surprised as we were. BlackWarGreymon's a loose cannon. Kari: Where do you think he's going? I kinda feel sorry for him. Team: HUH!?!?

The difference in Kari's voices is like night and day right here. Hikari delivers her lines in a sad and distant tone, like she's not really in the room talking to us. She's squirreled away inside the vault within her heart.

Kari just chats normally like this is an everyday conversation.

Kari: He must be very confused and lonely. She created him to be a fighting machine! That just seems really sad to me. Yolei: I must be going crazy. It sounds to me like you're worrying about a cold-blooded monster! Kari: Not really. I just care about him. Davis: That's the difference between you and Kari. She cares about other people. Yolei: What's that supposed to mean!? Davis: Just what it sounds like! T.K.: Hey hey! Do I have to separate you two!? It's stupid to fight each other! Let's go to the Digital World and finish what we started. Davis: Yeah! If we knock down the Control Spires, old White Hair is out of business! Kari, you're with me, aren't you? Kari: (reluctantly) ...yyyyeah...? DemiVeemon: I'm with you, Davis! Davis: Yeah! Yolei: (thinking) I hate to admit it but Davis might be right about Kari and me. She never puts her foot in her mouth like I do. I never know what she's thinking. It kinda makes me nervous. (transition to Digital World) Veemon: So anyway, then the guy says, "Knock Knock". Davis: Veemon, I told you, no more knock knock jokes. Veemon: This isn't a knock knock joke! It's a joke about a guy who tells knock knock jokes! Davis: No more! Veemon: You're no fun.

The dub doesn't bring up the possibility of Arukenimon making another BlackWarGreymon or something like him by combining another set of 100 Dark Towers. Which is a very serious threat that we should be concerned about.

Miyako can't tell what Hikari's thinking because of how much she carries inside her heart. Hikari is closed off. Emotionally reclusive. She doesn't share what's on her mind very often.

Kari is sassy and loud about her feelings so they obviously can't say that. Instead, Yolei can't tell what's on Kari's mind because she "doesn't put her foot in her mouth" like Yolei.

This rephrasing of the idea shifts the Neutral Zone. Miyako presents herself as the Neutral Zone and describes Hikari as comparatively reserved and withdrawn. Yolei presents Kari as the Neutral Zone and attacks herself for being comparatively brash and tactless. It's really weird that Yolei criticizes herself in this fashion rather than saying anything substantive about Kari.

The dub also doesn't carry Yolei's internal monologue through the scene transition. She gets everything she needs to say out before leaving the human world, and her time in the Digital World is taken up by Veemon's knock-knock joke.

Lastly, and this is mainly for the shippers, but: Davis expresses Daisuke's insult to Miyako/Yolei well but doesn't use the word.

According to Daisuke, what Hikari has and Miyako doesn't is 優しい yasashii, "kindness" or "gentleness". As in Ken's Crest virtue, by name. It doesn't really mean anything but the shippers might have fun with the fact that Daisuke admires Hikari for 優しい yasashii, specifically.

As the team trudges through the woods, Tailmon suddenly stops and looks around. They keep walking until Hikari suddenly realizes she's fallen behind and stops too.

Hikari: Tailmon? Tailmon: This is it! This is where I lost my Holy Ring! Hikari: Your Holy Ring is here!? Tailmon: I'm certain of it.

It's been thirty episodes, so Tailmon helpfully goes into flashback so we can watch a Unimon controlled by an Evil Ring take her Holy Ring from her.

Tailmon: At the time, I couldn't stop and look for it because the Digimon Kaiser was on a rampage. (End Flashback) Tailmon: With the Holy Ring, I might be able to reclaim my original strength.

Fingers crossed! We are well past the point where Tailmon being Adult-strength in base form would be a significant edge in combat so we might as well let her have her Holy Ring back. This nerf is no longer required.

In the dub:

Gatomon: This is weird.... Kari: What is it, Gatomon? Gatomon: This is it! I thought it looked familiar! It's where I lost my Tail Ring! Kari: Really!? Are you sure!? Gatomon: Positively! It was awful. (Flashback) Gatomon: Ken wasn't so sweet back then and even good Digimon like Unimon were forced to do his dirty work. (End Flashback) Gatomon: I couldn't look for my ring back then but if I had it now, I'd be one tough Digi-Kitty!

This is solid. The only thing that really stands out about it is Gatomon's generally more playful personality that she always has.

Once that's settled, one person in particular is hyped to get looking.

Daisuke: YES!!! Let's all start looking for it! Hikari: (pleased) Daisuke-kun!

Hikari's pleased, but Miyako and Iori both give smug, knowing looks to Daisuke.

Iori: Trying to score points with Hikari-san? Miyako: So predictable, Daisuke. Daisuke: (blushing) THAT'S NOT A BAD THING!!!

V-mon nudges Daisuke in the leg, grinning.

V-mon: You're not beaten yet, Daisuke! Daisuke: V-MOOOOON!!!

Tears streaming down his face, Daisuke picks V-mon up and shakes him. V-mon touched a nerve by calling out the fact that, at this point in the triangle he's formed with Takeru and Hikari, there is no mistake that he's the odd man out. There honestly never was but even Daisuke can't deny it anymore.

In the dub:

Davis: That's it then! We'll just have to go find it, whatever it is. Kari: You're the greatest! Cody: Trying to win points with Kari? Looks like it actually worked this time. Yolei: Not even Davis can strike out every time. Davis: (blushing) OH YES I CAN!!! Veemon: (nudge nudge) I don't think that's what you meant to say. Davis: Yes, it is!

The shot of Daisuke throttling Veemon is cut.

Davis is correct. The punchline of this bit in the original is that Daisuke has thoroughly been vanquished at this point in the competition for Hikari's affection and everyone's making fun of him for still trying.

Ironically, given the way they've treated him in the past, the dub plays up what a win this moment is for him to give him more dignity. But this is dignity he then defensively sacrifices as an alternative punchline to the throttling.

Daisuke's throttling of V-mon gets a laugh out of Hikari and we move on.

Takeru: In any case, Daisuke-kun is right. Let's try and find it. Patamon: Yeah! Hawkmon: Always hasten to do good. Armadimon: We're sure to find it-dagyaa! Tailmon: Thank you... all of you.

Hawkmon is quoting Japanese proverbs again. This one is "善は急げ Zen wa Isoge". 善 Zen means good. Good deeds, good things, good virtues. It is the act of doing good. 急げ Isoge means to hurry and do something in a rush. So the idea is that when you know that something is good, you know that it's the right thing to do, then you should get out and do it now without hesitation.

Daisuke: So, Hikari-chan-- Hikari: I'll search with Miyako-san.

Before Daisuke can even say it, Hikari walks right past him and wraps her arm around Miyako's. Miyako is as lost as Daisuke.

Miyako: Whuh...? Hikari: Let's start looking in that direction.

Without another word, Hikari and a very confused Miyako disappear into the woods. The cogs in Daisuke's head slowly turn until the clockwork strikes Rejection o'Clock, and he slumps over in defeat. Just then, V-mon nudges him in the leg.

V-mon: You're not beaten yet, Daisuke! Daisuke: V-MOOOOON!!!

Tears streaming down his face, Daisuke picks V-mon up and shakes him. V-mon touched a nerve by calling out the fact that, at this point in the triangle he's formed with Takeru and Hikari, there is no mistake that he's the odd man out. There honestly never was but even Daisuke can't deny it anymore.

Yeah, they fucking did it again. XD

In the dub:

T.K.: Whatever! He may be confused but he happens to be right! Patamon: Mhm! Hawkmon: That's one point for Davis. Armadillomon: Two points and a cookie if you find it. Gatomon: Now you're talking! Thanks a lot. Davis: Let's get going, Kari-- Kari: I think this clearing we passed is the best bet, Yolei. What do you think? Should we start there? (Kari and Yolei leave; Davis slumps) Davis: Dyaaaaaugh.... (Veemon nudges Davis) Davis: What!? Veemon: Back to usual, huh, buddy?

As before, Daisuke throttling V-mon is cut.

Kari's rejection of Davis comes off a bit more passive-aggressive here. Instead of announcing her searching partner before he can ask, she pointedly ignores him entirely. But the effect is the same in both versions; She doesn't directly shoot him down but she does very strongly imply rejection in both her body language and her words.

The dialogue from the Digimon is changed to tease Davis instead of expressing their eagerness to start searching.

As to the censorship, they had a pretty decent idea for a gag to make use of Veemon's nudging last time. But here, for the follow-up throttling, they've got nothing.

Nearby, Ken happens to be in these same woods.

Wormmon: Something about this place makes my skin crawl.

The last time Wormmon said that, Ken ignored him and did what he wanted to do anyway. It did not go well. This time, Ken stops and takes a careful look around the woods.

Then he sees it. Just ahead of him, the forest melts away, revealing the black ocean of Dagomon.

For a moment, Ken flashes back on the moment he dipped his Digivice into the water and it became the Dark Digivice. Then he screams.

Ken: UWAAAAAAUGH!!! Wormmon: Ken-chan, what's wrong!?

Nearby, Hikari and Miyako are searching the woods for Tailmon's Holy Ring.

Hawkmon: Nothing here. Tailmon: I think it was around here.... Ken: UWAAAAAAUGH!!! Hikari: Ichijouji-kun!

Without another word to the rest of the team, Hikari runs off into the woods, following Ken's voice.

Miyako: Hikari-chan? Tailmon: Hikari!?

Nothing else for the others to do but follow after.

In the dub, Ken and Wormmon have a bit of extra dialogue when Ken starts looking around.

Wormmon: This place just doesn't feel right. Let's go home, Ken. (Ken starts looking around) Wormmon: Ken? What's wrong? Ken: I'm not sure.... (Ken sees the black ocean and flashes back) Ken: UWAAAAAAUGH!!! Wormmon: Oh no, Ken! HELP!!! (Kari's team searches the woods) Hawkmon: This is exceedingly tedious. Gatomon: And you're the one with the bird's eye view! Ken: UWAAAAAAUGH!!! Kari: That's Ken! He's in trouble! (Kari runs off) Gatomon: (bitterly) I hate it when she does that.

It should be noted that in both versions, Hikari/Kari is the only person who hears Ken. This will be elucidated next scene, but it informs on the reactions the others give her. To Miyako/Yolei and Tailmon/Gatomon, we were searching the woods in relative silence apart from our own comments until Hikari/Kari suddenly ran off.

So, in the original, Hikari shouts "Ichijouji-kun" and then bolts into the woods while providing no further context. Miyako and Tailmon repeating her name is the verbal equivalent of them blinking at each other in confusion.

The dub has Kari say, "He's in trouble" before bolting into the woods. Now there's context, which makes Gatomon's flippant remark come off really harsh. You... hate it when she tries to help people in trouble? She has explained herself. You're being an asshole right now.

Ken's not doing so hot right now.

He's down on his knees, gripping his head in agony.

Wormmon: Ken-chan! Ken-chan!

Hikari comes running through the woods, tailed by the rest of her group. Miyako, Tailmon, and Hawkmon slowly gain on her.

Tailmon: Hikari! Miyako: Hikari-chan! Where are you going!? Hikari: Didn't you hear it!? That was Ichijouji-kun's voice! Miyako: Ken-kun's...?

Sure enough, the girls come upon Ken and Wormmon, still in that position. Hikari approaches him and crouches down to get on his level.

Hikari: What's wrong, Ichijouji-kun? Miyako: Did you run into something? Like BlackWarGreymon!? Ken: The ocean.... Miyako: What. Ken: I saw the ocean... The dark ocean.... Hikari: O_O The dark ocean...? Miyako: O_o The dark ocean, you said? I guess it's pretty dark here, sure, but.... Ken: It's over. I'm fine now.

Ken proves how fine he is by standing up and wobbling, nearly toppling right back over. Hikari gets up and grabs him, supporting him while they walk.

Miyako: You call that stumbling "fine"!? Honestly... An ocean in the middle of a forest....

While Miyako dismisses that idea as absurd, reality crackles around the three of them. The color slowly dulls into grays and a black wormhole appears around them. Ignorant of what's happening to reality, Hikari, Ken, and Miyako continue on into the wormhole, fading out of existence and leaving this area of the forest as empty as they found it.

In the dub:

Wormmon: Oh, Ken.... (Kari comes running, tailed by the others) Gatomon: Wait for me! Yolei: Where are you going!? Kari: Didn't you hear him scream just now!? It's Ken! Something's wrong with him! Yolei: Ken!? (They reach Ken) Kari: Don't worry, Ken. We're here now. It'll be okay. Yolei: What happened? Were you attacked? I don't see anything. Ken: The ocean.... Yolei: He's finally cracked! Ken: It was the dark ocean! It's horrible! Kari: O_O Huh!? The dark ocean!? Could it be...? Yolei: O_o Maybe it's contagious! I can't see a thing. How about you, Hawkmon? Ken: It's nothing... I'm fine. (Ken weakly gets up; Kari supports him) Yolei: No, you're not. You're clearly seeing things. "Dark Ocean"! Ha! Kari: I think I know how you're feeling. Yolei: Maybe we should just play along, Hawkmon. Hawkmon: Do you think he fell on his head? I did that once and thought I was a fruit bat.

This is perfect. A+. Yolei and Hawkmon's added banter fills the space where the dark portal is taking them, and the sheer irony of their skeptical remarks juxtaposed against them actively vanishing as they speak beautifully captures the intent of the moment.

And then the dub takes its first commercial break right on the fruit bat remark, as they are taken by the void. Chef's kiss.

Elsewhere in the woods, Daisuke, Takeru, and Iori are having no luck turning up the Holy Ring.

Iori: It isn't here. Takeru: Should we look somewhere else? Daisuke: (sigh) Let's do that.

Daisuke takes out his D-3, checking the radar.

Daisuke: Where's Hikari-chan's team right now?

On the radar, the lights of three Digivices are moving away from them at a fast clip.

Daisuke: What the hell?

At that remark, Takeru takes out his own D-3 and sees the same thing on his radar.

Takeru: Something happened to Hikari-chan's team!

Takeru breaks into a sprint, chasing after them without another word.

Daisuke: HEY!!! TAKERU!!!

Takeru isn't listening. He keeps right on running.

In the dub:

Armadillomon: This is hopeless. T.K.: We can't just give up! Davis: No way! Kari's counting on me to find this thing for her.

In the original, we're not talking about giving up. We're talking about searching a different area. Daisuke checks his D-3 to make sure we don't overlap onto Hikari's team.

The new dialogue gives him no reason to check his D-3. Instead, the D-3 itself suddenly starts beeping at him, as if trying to warn him.

Davis: Where'd she and Yolei go!? (Davis checks D-3) Davis: That doesn't make sense.... T.K.: What!?

Then T.K.'s D-3 suddenly beeps at him. So whatever Emergency Broadcast they're receiving, it's taking its sweet time crossing the woods from Davis to T.K.

T.K.: There are three of them!? But who's that with them!? (T.K. runs off) Group: Huh!? Davis: Three of them!?

Davis somehow didn't notice the third blip even though he looked at the radar too. But he's dumb and probably can't count.

The answer to who that is with them is Ken, of course. That's Ken's blip. We all know who Ken is. It's surprising that he's joined them but it's not, like, "DROP EVERYTHING, EMERGENCY, EMERGENCY" that Ken joined the girls.

What T.K. should be noticing is that the blips are shooting through the woods at a fast clip, as if they're running from something or being taken away by something. That's why they're in danger. Not because a mysterious sixth D-3 no one has ever heard of (except literally everyone) is suddenly among them.

Returning to Hikari's team, we find them now wander heavily desaturated woods.

Hikari: Doesn't it feel like we passed through this same area a moment ago? Tailmon: We might have gotten lost in these dense woods. Miyako: You can't be serious! H-Hang on a minute, are we going to waste away until nothing's left but our bones-- Oh?

Miyako spots Daisuke walking through the forest.

Miyako: Daisuke! Hawkmon: V-mon!

Miyako and Hawkmon wave frantically and call out to the pair.

Miyako: DAISUKEEEEEE!!! Hawkmon: V-MOOOOOON!!!

Daisuke stops and turns towards them. They run towards each other, but then Daisuke unexpectedly passes through Miyako and keeps going.

Hawkmon: V-mon!

The same thing happens to Hawkmon. V-mon runs right through him and keeps going.

Hawkmon: Eh!? What the....

Daisuke comes to a stop surrounded by Hikari's team.

Miyako: BUT WHY THOUGH!?!? Daisuke: That's so weird. I could have sworn I heard a voice. Hikari: Daisuke-kun...? V-mon: I thought so too. Ken: Motomiya-kun!

Finding nothing, Daisuke keeps going in search of the girls.

Daisuke: HIKARI-CHAN!!! MIYAKO!!! Hikari: It looks like we've ended up in a very strange place. Miyako: (whining) Nooo!

Sorry, Miyako. But you're in the weird shit with Hikari and Ken now. Hope you enjoy your stay.

In the dub:

Kari: These trees are all beginning to look the same; Tall and really, really dark. Gatomon: Do you think we've been chasing our tail this whole time? Yolei: You mean we're going in circles!? You think we're lost!? Is that it!? Forever and ever until we die-- Hm? (Yolei spots Davis and Veemon) Yolei: It's Davis! Hawkmon: We're saved! Yolei: OVER HERE!!! Hawkmon: VEEMON!!! EXCELLENT TIMING!!! Kari: DAVIS!!! T.K.!!! (Yolei and Davis run through each other) Yolei: Uhh... huh? Hawkmon: Veemon! (Veemon runs through Hawkmon) Hawkmon: Oogh, I feel faint.... Yolei: I'm confused.... Davis: I was sure I heard a voice over here. Do you think maybe they're ghosts, Veemon? Kari: Davis, we're right here! Veemon: Nah. I don't believe in 'em. Ken: Where are you going!? (Davis and Veemon run off into the woods) Davis: KARI!!! Veemon: KARI!!! Davis: YOLEI!!! Veemon: YOLEI!!! Kari: That's strange. If we can see him, why can't he see us? It doesn't make any sense. Yolei: What now!?

Kari calls out to T.K. for some reason even though he's not present in this scene.

Kari mentions that the trees are "starting to look the same". In the original, Hikari is doing the "I swear we've passed that exact rock four times" spooky maze bit.

The censors let Yolei say "die". Possibly because it's still not as vivid as her describing becoming 白骨 hakkotsu, skeletal remains.

Failing to find Hikari's team, the boys regroup in the woods.

Daisuke: Did you find Hikari-chan's team? Iori: They're nowhere to be found. Patamon: We've looked everywhere! Armadimon: Where could they have disappeared to-dagyaa? Takeru: Patamon, evolve and then we can search from the air. Patamon: Okay. Daisuke: V-mon, we're going to evolve too. V-mon: Yeah! Iori: Armadimon! Armadimon: Got it-dagyaa.

Takeru and Daisuke, I get, but I'm not sure what Ankylomon is going to contribute to this search that we aren't already doing. If anything, I'd be worried about accidentally trampling the girls by kaiju stomping blindly around the forest.

In the dub:

Davis: Cody! T.J.! Did you find Kari? Cody: They seem to have just disappeared! It's not logical! They can't have gone that far! Armadillomon: Well, they have. Patamon: Even I couldn't find them! Not one trace. T.K.: I'll go up with Patamon. We just have to try harder. Patamon: Okay! Davis: They're around here somewhere. We'll find 'em! Veemon: Yes, sir! Cody: You're ready, Armadillomon? Armadillomon: You can count on me!

Davis chooses an incredibly inappropriate time to bring back the "getting T.K.'s name wrong on purpose out of spite" bit.

Nobody mentions Digivolving; The most that's said is T.K. ambiguously saying he'll "go up with Patamon". So now the shots of each character psyching up their Partner for evolution are just them expressing that they're gonna be even more searchtastic than the searching they've done, and it's really awkward.

What exactly are we going to do to "try harder"? There is an answer but it's one the dub fails to express.

While they're doing that, Kari's team continues to explore the dark woods.

Ken: The fog is getting thicker....

No one has anything to say to that. They keep walking on in silence until Miyako suddenly has an idea.

Miyako: Hey, let's sing a song. Hikari & Ken: ... Miyako: Then how about we play shiritori? Shiritori sound good? Hikari & Ken: ... Miyako: Mrr... Oh, that's it! We can play cards! Let's play-- Ah! But I didn't bring any cards! Whoops, silly me. Ahahahahaha... heh.... Hikari & Ken: ...

She's trying so hard to lighten the mood but those two are drowning in plot.

しりとり Shiritori is a Japanese word game where you try and say a word that begins with the last syllable of the word the previous player said. It's to help children learn and develop their vocabulary.

Ken: We don't seem to be going anywhere. And we might not be able to go back either. Hikari: It's okay. As long as we want to go back and there's someone out there who wants us back, there will always be a way out of this world. Miyako: (sharply) Hikari-chan! Hikari: Eh? Miyako: You're mocking me, aren't you? Hikari: Of course not! Miyako: You're mocking me! Hikari: I'm not mocking you! Miyako: Of course you are!

Miyako furiously storms past Hikari and Ken and stomps off into the woods alone.

Hikari: Miyako-san.... Ken: Uh....

Poor Ken. You know he's gonna mentally jot that down as another bullet point of proof in the "My presence disrupts your team dynamic" category.

Miyako's sudden freakout is a little confusing but I think what happened here is that Ken and Hikari were talking quietly, and she was a ways back. So she didn't hear what they said. She just saw them whispering to each other after ignoring her.

As the only one here who has no idea what the dark ocean is, Miyako doesn't really grasp the severity of the situation or why Hikari and Ken are so haunted by this place. As far as she knows, a weird Digital World forest is doing some weird Digital World bullshit.

In the dub:

Ken: I don't like the way this fog keeps getting thicker. Kari & Ken: ... Yolei: Hey, I know! Let's sing a song! Kari & Ken: ... Yolei: Okay, so you don't like that plan. Why don't we play a game? Kari & Ken: ... Yolei: How about this? We can play my favorite game, Telephone! ...oh, I forgot, there are only three of us. I guess that would be pretty boring. Ehehe! Kari & Ken: ... Ken: How are we going to find our way home if we don't even know where we are? It's hopeless. Kari: Nothing is ever hopeless, Ken. You of all people should know that. There are too may people who want us back and we want to go back too much to be stuck here forever. Yolei: WHY WON'T YOU TALK TO ME!?!? Kari: What!? Yolei: Do you two want to be alone or something!? You could just say so instead of ignoring me like this! Kari: We're not ignoring you. Yolei: Yes, you are! (Yolei storms past them) Kari: Come back, Yolei! Yolei: Hmph! Ken: Um, Yolei...?

What 12/13-year-old has Telephone as their favorite game? Miyako also suggests playing a childish game but she's not out here doing ad reads for it. It's just, y'know, a thing you can do that doesn't require paraphernalia.

(Incidentally, this episode of Revisiting Digimon Adventure was brought to you by Red Rover.)

Do children still play Telephone? I don't know if children still play Telephone in this modern age of The YooToobs and The Influencers. In case it needs explaining, Telephone is a game where you whisper something into one person's ear, then they whisper it into another person's ear as best they heard/remember it. You go around the room until it gets back to the original speaker.

Like しりとり shiritori, it's not really a game so much as a learning exercise. It's a practical demonstration of the way information changes through second-hand retellings, as the statement or phrase you get back at the end is usually wildly different from what you originally said.

In any case, what Kari says to Ken is similar to the original, but they both water down the context. Hikari is expressing a personal lesson she's learned from her own time in the Dark Ocean. She wanted out and Takeru wanted her out, and together they forged a path.

Kari expresses the same idea but in the abstract. We have to get out because of the people who want us back, rather than those people being the way out. This makes her and Ken's discussion sound more generic and universal to any perilous situation, while Ken and Hikari are talking about their experience with the dark ocean specifically.

They also changed the nature of Yolei's freakout... sort of? Miyako accuses Hikari of バカにして bakanishite, which means to ridicule or look down on someone. It's not super clear where she's drawing this conclusion; Is she misinterpreting their whispering together as them mocking her? Or does she think they're ignoring her on purpose, looking down their noses at her antics? Unclear. Maybe both.

Yolei's freakout is clean and unambiguous, while still playing to the same idea. They're ignoring her and whispering to each other, and she feels hurt and dejected by it.

After storming off from the group, Miyako doesn't get very far before her rage deflates and regret sets in.

Miyako: Ugh... I did it again. I said that right to her face at a time like this.... Hawkmon: You did go a little overboard.

Miyako and Hawkmon come to the edge of a massive ravine.

Miyako: Oh look, instant karma. It's a dead end. Wait, what's....

Miyako describes the cliff as バチが当たった bachi ga atatta, divine retribution from the gods as punishment for one's transgressions.

But then, looking down into the ravine, she sees something twinkling in the darkness.

Miyako: HEY!!! That's the Holy Ring, isn't it?

Hikari and Ken come quick, joining Miyako at the ravine's edge.

Hikari: The Holy Ring!?

Standing at the edge and peering down into it, they can't quite make it out beyond the glinting.

Hikari: What do you think, Tailmon? Tailmon: I don't know.... Ken: Holy Ring...?

Ken flashes back on Tailmon's Holy Ring deflecting an Evil Ring in the first episode.

Ken: (thinking) I've seen it somewhere before. I feel like I've held it in my hands. When was that? There are holes in my memory....

He should probably share that. Because we're looking around these woods under the assumption that the Holy Ring was left lying here after Tailmon lost it. But if Ken's held it in his hands then that means his forces recovered it. It could be anywhere, and is probably not glinting at us from that ravine.

In the dub:

Yolei: Ugh... I did it again, didn't I? Oh, Hawkmon... What ever was I thinking? Hawkmon: Thinking is precisely what you didn't do. Yolei: Ken probably hates me after I made a fool of myself. Hawkmon: I doubt that.

Fuck Kari, I guess. Yolei only regrets doing that in front of the cute boy. This is particularly notable because Miyako and Hikari's relationship is supposed to be what this episode is about.

Yolei: Uh oh! Now what!? (Yolei spots glinting object in ravine) Yolei: KARI!!! GATOMON!!! I THINK WE FOUND IT!!! (The others come running) Gatomon: My Tail Ring!? Kari: Really!? Yolei: See? Right down there. Kari: What do you think, Gatomon? Gatomon: I can't tell from here. Ken: (thinking) I know I've seen this before, but where? (Flashback to Gatomon's Tail Ring deflecting Dark Ring) Ken: (thinking) There are too many gaps in my memory. Why can I only remember the awful things and not the things that would help someone? It almost feels like it's on purpose. Wormmon: (thinking) He has that look again....

Those two things are not mutually exclusive, Ken. If you took the Tail Ring, that's an awful thing that would help someone now.

Well, only one thing to do now. Much like that time Miyako wildly speculated that Ken's flying fortress flew off into the sky, she's going in before anyone can even discuss what to do.

Miyako: Well, I'm going down to take a look. Hawkmon: I feel like we've been here before. Have we been here before? Hawkmon: Miyako-san, I should really be the one to go. Miyako: Nah, it's fine. Hikari: Don't push yourself, Miyako-san. Miyako: It's fine, I'm fiIIIIYAAAH!!!

In the middle of delivering the dismissive blowoff phrase 平気平気 heiki heiki a second time, the ledge beneath Miyako's foot gives out and she falls. See, that's why Hawkmon should have been the one to go. He wasn't being patronizing. He has wings. Wings are good for combatting gravity.

Hikari catches her by the wrist before she can plummet too far.

Hawkmon: Oh my Digi-God, this is happening again. Miyako: (relieved) Thank you, Hikari-chan.... Hikari: Are you okay, Miyako-san!?

Ken comes over to help too. But then they both see it. Out of nowhere, familiar-looking waves crash into the wall at the bottom of the ravine.

Ken grabs his head and screams while Hikari loses her footing. Hikari and Miyako plunge into the abyss together.

Ken: UWAAAAAAGH!!! Hikari & Miyako: AHHHHHHH!!!! Hawkmon: Miyako-san! Tailmon: Hikari! Wormmon: Ken-chan!

Without hesitation, Hawkmon and Tailmon leap down into the ravine to chase their Partners. Wormmon tries to get through to Ken but he's lost, screaming bloody murder into the sky.

...and that brings us to our commercial break! Hey kids, do you like Hot Wheels? You should buy some Hot Wheels! (This commercial was brought to you by our sponsor Red Rover. Red Rover, Red Rover, send customers on over.)

In the dub:

Yolei: There's only one way to find out! Hawkmon: Oh, Yolei! I beg of you, don't! Yolei: You worry too much. Kari: Of course he's worried. It's too risky. Yolei: It's the least I can do after--WHOA!!! (Yolei loses footing; Kari catches her) Hawkmon: I wish you wouldn't do this sort of thing! Yolei: Uh... At this exact moment, so do I. Kari: Don't worry! I have you! (Crashing waves; Kari and Yolei fall in) Ken: UWAAAAAAUGH!!! Kari & Yolei: AHHHHHHH!!! (Hawkmon and Gatomon go in after) Hawkmon: YOLEI!!! Gatomon: KARI!!! Wormmon: Uh, Ken...?

The dub goes along with this spot being the second commercial break.

Hawkmon here tells Yolei not to go into the ravine but doesn't propose the obviously sensible alternative.

Returning from commercial, Hikari rouses Miyako from unconsciousness.

Hikari: Miyako-san!

Miyako slowly opens her eyes. She's lying on a small ridge jutting out from the cliff.

Hikari: (relieved) Miyako-san! Miyako: Hikari-chan! Hikari: Whew. Are you hurt? Miyako: I'm okay. Where are we

Miyako looks around at the dark ravine around her as it starts to come back to her.

Miyako: That's right... I was trying to reach the Holy Ring.... Hawkmon: (gently) It was awfully reckless of you.

Especially considering that we've done this exact thing before. Do we need to put Miyako in a safety harness to keep her from throwing herself into chasms?

Tailmon holds out a broken piece of an Evil Ring to show Miyako.

Tailmon: Apparently, this was actually what you saw. Miyako: An Evil Ring!? (pouts) It wasn't even the Holy Ring.... Tailmon: Still, I appreciate your concern. Thank you. Miyako: Tailmon.... Hikari: Now let's hurry and get out of here. Miyako: Right.

I'm glad Tailmon's touched by Miyako's exuberance. Helps to smooth over the argument we just had. But she did still throw herself and Hikari down a cliff for nothing so that's awkward. XD

One of these days. One of these days Miyako will recklessly throw herself off a cliff and it will actually be helpful! Surely!

In the dub, Kari doesn't say anything until after Yolei opens her eyes.

Kari: Yolei, wake up. Yolei: Whuuuuuh... (attentive) Kari, where are we? Kari: Thank goodness. I was worried. Yolei: About me!? Why? ...oh, yeah. I remember seeing something shining down here but then what happened? Hawkmon: The usual. You did something absurd. (Gatomon holds out Dark Ring fragment) Gatomon: But we did find this. Yolei: It's just a Dark Ring... (pouts) I was trying so hard not to be selfish for once. Gatomon: But you weren't. You thought it was the real thing. Thank you, Yolei. Yolei: You're just saying that.... Kari: No, really. It was very thoughtful. Yolei: (touched) It was?

This is pretty good. Hits all the important notes and doesn't even get tripped up by 引っかかる hikkakaru. Good job.

Now that we're up to speed, it's time to get out of this ravine.

Miyako: Hawkmon, evolve! Hawkmon: Yes, ma'am!

With "Show Me Your Brave Heart" playing behind him, Hawkmon gets as far as "HAWKMON SHINKAAAAAA" before the sharp tone of a bell kills the music and brings us right back to the cliffside. Hawkmon's evolution goes absolutely nowhere.

Miyako: ...what are you doing? Hawkmon: Huh? That's strange... I can't evolve.

Something about our present circumstances is suppressing Hawkmon's evolution.

In the dub:

Yolei: Alright, let's get out of here! Hawkmon: My pleasure!

They don't have the bell chime that serves effectively the same purpose as a record scratch, but they do have the evolution noises comically fizzle out for a similar effect.

Yolei: Uhh, what are you doing? Hawkmon: It seems... I just can't do it.

Consequently, this part is perfect.

Despite the fact that Digimentals are a thing, Hawkmon's inability to evolve sends Miyako spiraling. It's the straw that broke the camel's back.

Miyako: EHHHHH!?!? WHY CAN'T YOU EVOLVE!?!? HOW ELSE ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET OUT OF HERE!?!? ARE WE GOING TO BE STUCK HERE FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES!?!? Hawkmon: Miyako-san.... Miyako: AND EVEN IF WE COULD GET OUT OF HERE, WE HAVE NO IDEA WHERE WE EVEN ARE!!! Tailmon: Miyako.... Miyako: (half-crying) DAISUKE EVEN WALKED RIGHT THROUGH ME!!! Hikari: Miyako-san.... Miyako: AAAAAAGH NO MORE!!! WE'RE FINISHED!!! OUR LIVES ARE GOING TO END RIGHT HERE--

Suddenly, Hikari slaps Miyako right in the face, bringing a stark silence to her understandable but unhelpful panic attack.

Hikari: ...Sorry. Miyako: Yeah... Me too.

Still, it's good that she got that all out of her system. It can't have been helpful to keep it bottled up.

In the dub:

Yolei: What do you mean? This is no time for jokes, Hawkmon! Stop fooling around and Digivolve! How can you pick on me like this!? I just fell from a cliff, you know! Hawkmon: There she goes again.... Yolei: If you can't Digivolve, we'll never get out of this canyon! And even if we do, where will we go!? Gatomon: We'll be fine. Yolei: NO, WE WON'T!!! HOW CAN WE BE FINE!?!? DAVIS RAN RIGHT THROUGH ME!!! Kari: We'll think of something. Yolei: NO, WE WON'T!!! MY LIFE IS OVER!!! I'LL NEVER GET MARRIED, HAVE CHILDREN, MAKE MILLIONS IN THE STOCK MARKET, I HATE THIS--

Unlike most instances of kid-on-kid violence, Kari's slap is allowed to occur completely uncensored.

Hawkmon: Gyooogh... Yolei: ...huh. Kari: Oh, what have I done!? Yolei: I'm sorry... I guess I needed that. Hawkmon: Brutal! But effective!

In the original, all of Miyako's panic points are observations about the dire circumstances they're in. The dub has her rope in a baseless accusation that Hawkmon's picking on her and also complain that she won't get married, have children, or make millions in the stock market. The latter of which is fairly founded in the original sentiment that they're going to die here.

The dub also positions the other three characters as trying to argue with and/or be snippy about her meltdown. In the original, they just express concern up until the sudden slap. The dub version does flow really well, however, as it builds momentum and shows the others trying to reason with her before resorting to the slap.

I'm just a little snippy about how dismissive Hawkmon is of her.

Once Miyako's calmed herself, Tailmon and Hawkmon quickly excuse themselves from the scene.

Hawkmon: We'll go look for something we can use as a rope. Tailmon: Wait here.

Hawkmon and Tailmon ascend the canyon by wing and claw, leaving Hikari and Miyako alone on the ledge. They sit in silence for a moment. But eventually, with nothing else to do, Hikari breaks the silence.

Hikari: Miyako-san, you can be a handful sometimes. Miyako: (sadly) I knew that's what you thought of me.... Hikari: But... I've always envied that about you. Miyako: Huh? Hikari: I can't just scream or admit when I'm scared the way you do, Miyako-san. Miyako: Hikari-chan.... Hikari: Maybe that's why I'm being taken by the Dark World.... Miyako: The Dark World...? Hikari: I don't want to go... But I can't stop it....

Miyako looks at Hikari with absolutely zero context for the shit that just came out of her mouth. But before they can discuss it any further, Hawkmon and Tailmon lower a vine.

Hawkmon: MIYAKO-SAN!!! Tailmon: HIKARI!!!

With their help, the girls are saved from the dark chasm.

Hikari's admission is interesting particularly in how it connects with her conversation with Takeru in the Dagomon episode. Hikari is not an individually strong person; Her strength comes from the people who support her. She inspires others to care for and support her, and their power in turn becomes her power. It's something Takeru had a hard time appreciating, given his own struggle for respect and independence with his brother Yamato.

Here, in this context, Hikari harkens back to that aspect of her and admits her admiration for Miyako's forthrightness. Hikari could never just stand up and go, "I'M GOING DOWN THAT CLIFF" and then hurl herself off the ledge without a care in the world. For better or worse, Miyako is bold and assertive in ways Hikari can't be, and Hikari envies that.

She's just... never really expressed that because Hikari keeps her feelings close to her chest. That's the kind of person she is. She's stoic and hard to read.

In the dub:

Hawkmon: Now, let's see if we can find our way out of this mess. Gatomon: I'm with you. (Hawkmon and Gatomon leave) Kari: ... Yolei: ... Kari: Yolei, I'm really sorry for slapping you like that. It's just not like me. You seem to bring out the worst in me! Maybe because we're so different. Yolei: No, it's me. Kari: I have to be honest, Yolei. The truth is, I envy you. Yolei: Huh? Kari: I wish I could say what I'm feeling like you do. I keep everything inside so no one gets hurt but me. Yolei: I had no idea. Kari: Maybe that's why I was drawn into the World of Darkness just like Ken. Yolei: Ken!? You're not like Ken! Kari: We keep too much inside, making us vulnerable. (Vine lowers) Hawkmon: Hello hello! Rescue is at hand! Gatomon: Going up?

It would be easier to buy that Kari has this problem if she wasn't so sassy and assertive all the time. The dub's alternative take on the character has kinda come back to bite them.

Kari brings Ken into this conversation and asserts that bottling his feelings too much was the reason he was taken by the Dark World too. Kari, you have no idea what Ken's relationship with the dark ocean is. Don't try and speak to it.

Therapy for Ken. And Hikari/Kari, for that matter. Really, therapy for everyone.

With Hawkmon and Tailmon's help, the girls are soon back up topside. With Ken. Remember Ken? He's still here.

Miyako: (relieved) Finally, we're out of there! Ken: Um.... Miyako: Huh? Ken: I'm so sorry I couldn't come and help. Miyako: Nah, you're no good in dark places, Ken-kun. If you had fallen in with us, it'd be terrible with all that screaming you'd do! Ken: ... Miyako: Ah! But you were acting as the Digimon Kaiser at one point, so you do have some guts, right? Hikari: Miyako-san! Miyako: Huh? (sheepish) ...ohhhh, did I just remind you of something you didn't want to think about? (excited) Oh, that's right! That thing I spotted was an Evil Ring, not a Holy Ring! What a ripoff, huh? An Evil Ring, of all things! Oh! But don't worry, I'm not blaming you for that. Ken: ...uh....

Hikari, who has been visibly growing increasingly despondent as Miyako continued to talk, suddenly can't help herself and starts laughing.

Miyako: It's not funny, Hikari-chan! Hikari: Ahahahahahaha b-but hahahahahahaha Miyako: I guess it is pretty funny. Both: Hahahahahahahaha!

Ken remains standing there with the trauma Miyako slapped him in the face with while the two girls laugh at how insensitive she is. And it is pretty funny. Both Miyako's thoughtlessness and the general irony of the Digimon Kaiser waiting helplessly around for us while we went on an Evil Ring misadventure.

In the dub:

Yolei: I'm glad that's over. Ken: Um.... Yolei: Ken? Ken: I'm sorry, Yolei. I wasn't able to help you. Yolei: That's okay, Ken. I know you were afraid, and it would have been silly for you to fall down with us. You were so freaked out, you probably wouldn't have done any good anyway. Ken: Nyeeeeuurgh.... Yolei: Oh, right! I forgot! You were the Digimon Emperor. You were brave back then! What happened? Ken: Hey, Yolei! Stop! Yolei: (sheepish) Oops, I'm sorry. I guess you don't really want to be reminded of that. I wouldn't! (excited) Hey, guess what we found down there! You'll think this was funny. It wasn't Gatomon's Tail Ring at all! It was one of your Dark Rings! Kari: (gasp) Yolei: Okay, that's not funny but I didn't mean "Funny Ha-Ha", I meant "Funny Ironic" funny. Don't get me wrong. Even though you made them, I'm not blaming you. (Kari starts laughing despite herself) Yolei: What are you laughing at, Kari!? This is serious! Kari: Hahahahaha.... Yolei: I'm just making it worse, huh?

Yolei does not join in the laughing, and instead Kari's laughter comes to a stop of its own accord. In the original, they keep laughing until an abrupt stop that's about to come.

The dub does an amazing job with Yolei's thoughtlessness. "You were brave back then! What happened?" got me. XD I also like that she species that it was one of "your" Dark Rings. There's not really any other Dark Ring it could be but the pointedness is great. 10/10

Hikari and Miyako keep laughing until Hikari suddenly gasps. The tone drops immediately.

Miyako: Hikari-chan? What's wrong? Hikari: I hear it... The sound of the waves!

Hikari stands up and runs into the woods.

Miyako: Hikari-chan!

If she hears Miyako, she shows no sign of it. She keeps going. Keeps running until she comes to another cliff at the edge of the forest. A cliff overlooking a vast black ocean.

Hikari: I knew it. I knew this was the ocean. To this place again... (Flashback to dark ocean shoreline in Dagomon episode) Hikari: ...I've been called!

Hikari's last line is one of those instances where the Japanese script is really hard to make fit perfectly into English. The line is "またここに... 呼ばれた Mata koko ni... yobareta!" This line is punctuated in a way that works specifically within Japanese sentence structure.

The phrase またここに Mata koko ni establishes context. また Mata means "Again" and ここ koko is "Here". Hikari hesitates, fearful, and there's a very quick flashback to the Dagomon episode with Hikari looking out at the dark ocean, with that ominous lighthouse in the distance. Then we're back to the present and she dramatically throws down the verb 呼ばれた yobareta which is to call out to or invite someone to join you. "To this place again... (flashback) ...I've been called!"

The fansubs translate it as "They called me here... (flashback) ...again!" Which is correct English sentence structure but puts the emphasis on the wrong part of the sentence. Hikari's not freaking out about a rerun; She's freaking out because she's been taken by the dark ocean.

But I'm not sure there really is a way to word this that keeps the emphasis on the verb and sounds organic and natural in English sentence structure. This is a case where you have to pick and choose what matters; Some part of this delivery is doomed to be lost in translation.

In the dub, Kari's laughter has fizzled out when she suddenly gasps, so there isn't that sharp juxtaposition.

Gatomon: Kari? What's wrong? Kari: The waves... I can hear the waves.... Yolei: Kari? Gatomon: Oh no.... (Kari runs into the woods until she reaches the ocean) Kari: Oh, I knew it! Is this darkness inside of me? Inside of Ken? Is that why we can't get away from it? I wish I were stronger.... (Flashback) Kari: ...or knew what it wanted.

The dub's solution is to just go completely off-script. Kari speculates that it's the darkness in her and Ken's hearts that the ocean wants, again drawing comparison between the two characters.

Before long, the rest of Hikari's team arrives.

Tailmon: Hikari! Miyako: Hikari-chan!

As Miyako, Ken, and their Digimon approach the edge of the cliff, they look out at the vast expanse before them.

Ken: It's true. It is the ocean. Miyako: Ocean? Where's the ocean? I don't see it. There's just land stretching out in every direction. Hawkmon: That's right.

Seeing the cliff's edge from Miyako's perspective, she and Hawkmon see an endless patch of forest ahead of her. The ocean isn't here for them.

Tailmon: Why does this ocean keep calling out for Hikari!? What the hell is out there!? Ken: Hikari-san's been to this ocean too? You mean it wasn't just me...? Miyako: Both Hikari-chan and Ken-kun...? WHY CAN'T I SEE IT!?!?

Miyako protests her exclusion so furiously and so loudly that the eldritch forces of unknowable darkness deep beneath the waves acquiesce to her sheer force of personality and the forest disappears. The dark ocean appears for Miyako too. VICTORY FOR THE REALITY-BREAKING POWER OF BEST VIRTUE PURITY.

Just like Mimi's cross-dimensional scream. These are the same.

Miyako: There really is an ocean! Ken: Something's wrong. It's like the world is misaligned somehow. Miyako: Is it because the power that protects the Digital World is weakening? Ken: Huh? Miyako: Izumi-senpai told us about it the other day. Ken: A power that protects the Digital World....

Ken has no idea what we're talking about but Miyako's probably hit it right on the money. It occurs to me that what we're standing in right now would have been a killer plot point to have in the first anime. This would have been a good way to show the "distortions in the Digital World" that were such a major plot point.

In the dub:

Gatomon: Don't scare me like that, Kari! Ken: It really is the dark ocean. Yolei: Ocean? What are you talking about? All I see are a bunch of trees! Hawkmon: It is indeed an ocean of trees but I don't think that's what they mean. Gatomon: I almost lost Kari once before to this stupid ocean. I wish I knew what it wants with her. Ken: Kari, you've been here? Seen this before? I didn't know anyone but me had ever been here. Yolei: Kari sees it and now Ken too. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING!!! (Yolei can see it now) Yolei: Whoa.... Hawkmon: (worried) Yolei, what have you done...? Ken: Something doesn't feel right here. It's as if the world has slipped out of place. Yolei: I wonder if it's because the powers guarding the Digital World are losing their grip. Ken: Huh? Yolei: I was just thinking about something that Izzy told us once. Ken: This could be important. What powers was he talking about?

No one knows! He was incredibly vague about it. XD But we'll surely find out.

This is all pretty good. I really like the phrasing on "the world has slipped out of place". That's a really good way of capturing the imagery of the original line. Ken's expressing that we're in some sort of reality collision or tear, where the dark ocean and the Digital World are overlapping each other in the same physical space.

Nearby, Arachnemon and Mummymon are driving down a road lined with Dark Towers. Arachnemon notices Hikari, Miyako, and Ken up on that cliff fizzling with static, drifting between realities. She finds it very amusing.

Arachnemon: Is that...? Those kids are such amateurs! They blundered straight into a distortion in the world. This would be a good opportunity to dispose of them.

Mummymon glances down uncertainly at the radar they're following, still tracking the "phase distortion" that BlackWarGreymon's leaving in his wake.

Mummymon: ...but we're already pursuing BlackWarGreymon. Arachnemon: Oh, I know.

Plucking out several strands of hair, she lets them fly into the Dark Towers they're passing. As usual, her hair embeds itself within the Towers and a new Digimon is created.

Arachnemon: Leaving it to you!

With those marching orders, Mummymon keeps on driving and the pair wash their hands of this.

In the dub:

Arukenimon: Look at that, Mummymon! Isn't this delightful? Those foolish little children have stumbled into a phase warp. They have no idea how vulnerable they are! Mummymon: It's such a shame we have to keep following BlackWarGreymon. Arukenimon: You underestimate me. (Arukenimon plucks several hairs) Arukenimon: This little operation isn't worthy of my personal attention. SPIRIT NEEDLE!!! (New Digimon is created) Arukenimon: Enjoy your lunch, my darling! Digimon: Grahahahaha!

Solid.

Back at the ocean, Hikari falls to her knees, holding her head.

Hikari: I don't want to be here.... Tailmon: Hikari! Pull yourself toge-- Hikari: I want to go home! Miyako: It's okay. I'm sure we'll get home.

But then they hear it. The low, bestial growling. An unseen force drawing closer, its hideous and monstrous gurgling growing louder, all coming from....

...not the ocean. Back the other way, actually. Arachnemon's Digimon slowly melds through reality, piercing the veil between worlds to reach the children at the dark ocean.

Hikari: Nyeugh! WHAT IS THAT!?!?

Glad you asked! Blossomon is a Perfect-stage Data-attribute Plant Digimon. They're from the Wind Guardians V-Pet, where they were initially the Perfect evolution for Togemon and Kiwimon before Lilimon replaced them in the .5 edition.

This is our first time doing a rundown for Blossomon, though we did see one of them among the Wind Guardians in the first anime. Takeru tricked Pinocchimon into murdering them with his .44 Magnum, and they were such a minor part of the show that I guess the narrator just didn't feel like doing a rundown back then.

Narrator: Blossomon! Perfect-stage. Plant Digimon. Their special attack is Spiral Flower.

He doesn't really feel like doing a rundown this time either. Fuck Blossomon, I guess.

In the dub:

Kari: (half-crying) Ohhhh I want to go home! Gatomon: You have to fight it, Kari! Don't give in. I need you. Yolei: Don't worry, Kari. We'll be home soon, remember? You said so yourself.

She did not. The closest thing Kari has said to "We'll be home soon" is when she said to Ken, "Nothing is ever hopeless... There are too may people who want us back and we want to go back too much to be stuck here forever." Which is a promise of escape but makes no guarantee of imminency.

That seems to be what the dub is going for, though. Might have been a good idea to just have Yolei quote Kari rather than paraphrasing her.

Digimon: (snarling noises) (Everyone turns to look as an eye appears in the air) Gatomon: I think Big Brother is watching us.... (The rest of Blossomon emerges) Hawkmon: Or at least his corsage! Ken: (rundown) That's Blossomon, an Ultimate Digimon. Her Spiral Flower attack is a good excuse for weedkiller and her children are worse than thorns!

I think the "children" are supposed to be Blossomon's four smaller buds. That's a weird line. Still, at least Ken gave her a rundown. He put more effort into this than the narrator did.

"At least his corsage" got me. XD

I don't think we use the terminology "Big Brother" in this context anymore. I haven't heard it in a long time. But back in the early 00's, "Big Brother" meant government surveillance. "Big Brother watching you" means the government is spying on what you're doing. It was a big deal back then, what with the PATRIOT act and all.

Today, we're all being spied on all the time by everybody. Fucking Walmart is spying on you. So it isn't really noteworthy anymore. The phrase became obsolete not by progress but by normalization.

Suddenly, Tailmon notices something: A tear in reality left in Blossomon's wake, through which color and light are pouring into the dark ocean.

Tailmon: AHH!!! I see the forest through that rift!

Colored light from the rift blankets the children, restoring their colors to vibrancy.

Hawkmon: Now! Miyako-san! Miyako: Yeah! You might be able to evolve now! Ken: Wormmon! Wormmon: On it!

Using their D-3s, Miyako and Ken evolve Hawkmon and Wormmon into their Adult forms. Tailmon wants to join the fight too and turns to Hikari.

Tailmon: Hikari!

With a shaky hand, Hikari holds up her D-3. But then Blossomon lets out a roar so hideous that it drowns out and kills Show Me Your Brave Heart, silencing all music. Hikari fractures once more. She drops her D-3 and falls to her knees screaming.

Hikari: NOOOOOO!!! Tailmon: Hikari! Miyako: Hikari-chan!

It's an interesting detail that the dark ocean itself suppresses evolution. The Dagomon episode didn't really go into that, but it's not a retcon either. There was a Dark Tower present for that episode, so the only natural evolution that occurred was Angewomon after it was destroyed. And, by that point, Hikari's light was piercing the dark ocean's reality.

Here, by this point, it's clear that we aren't about to run into a surprise Dark Tower around the corner. It's the dark ocean itself that suppressed Hawkmon from evolving. The power to suppress evolution comes from here. It's a product of this reality. And that makes sense, what with the dark ocean's corruption being what turned Ken's Digivice into the Dark Digivice that powered the Dark Towers. This is the source.

That might not seem to gel with the existence of Perfect Digimon in the dark ocean but remember that the Hangyomon and Dagomon we saw weren't really Digimon. They only assumed the form of Digimon.

In the dub:

Gatomon: Heyyyy! Behind her! There's a hole in space! I can see right through it! (Light restores color to everyone) Hawkmon: I believe that's my cue. Yolei: About time. You'll have no trouble Digivolving now. Ken: Are you ready? Wormmon: Lemme at her! (Aquilamon and Stingmon Digivolve) Gatomon: Is it okay? Kari: Mhm! (Blossomon lets out a hideous shriek) Kari: WAAAUGH!!! Gatomon: Kari? Yolei: This is not a good time!

Yolei returns the favor for how few fucks anyone gave when she was the one freaking out.

Kari gives a weirdly confident "Mhm!" when she raises her D-3 even though she's supposed to be (and visibly is) shaky and hesitant. Hikari is actively undergoing a steadily worsening panic attack and her animation doesn't really work with that vocalization.

There's no time left to get Hikari in on this. The battle begins.

Blossomon swings their tendrils at Aquilamon and Stingmon, but their aerial mobility proves surprisingly effective at keeping away from Blossomon's attacks.

Aquilamon: BLAST LASER!!!

Aquilamon takes a shot, hitting Blossomon square in the writhing vines that pass for their center mass. But when the dust settles, Blossomon seems unaffected and lets out another roar.

This second roar pushes Hikari deeper and deeper into the dark ocean's clutches. Even the reality of the dark ocean now fades, leaving Hikari adrift in the waters.

Hikari: No... Stop it.... Don't take me away!

Back at the ocean, Miyako and Tailmon both try to shake Hikari back to reality.

Miyako: Hikari-chan! Tailmon: Hikari!

But it's to no avail. We're losing her to the gremlins of her mind.

In the dub:

Aquilamon: BLAST RINGS!!! (Aquilamon blasts Blossomon; Blossomon roars again) Kari: Not again! DON'T TAKE MEEEEEEE!!! I just don't think I can stand it this time. (Yolei and Gatomon shake Kari) Yolei: Kari, snap out of it! Gatomon: You have to fight!

There's a weird tempo to Kari's protestations here where her level of panic and shrieking peaks at "Don't take me" and then she comes back down for her third delivery once she's fully immersed in the dark ocean. Like. Now she's in the water; Why does she sound calmer?

With Hikari disabled, Aquilamon and Stingmon go on a full offensive.

Stingmon: SPIKING FINISH!!!

Stingmon scores a direct hit with his attack, but it means nothing to Blossomon. Blossomon punches him with one of their buds, dropping him on his back.

Ken: STINGMON!!! Aquilamon: GLIDE HORN!!!

Aquilamon's attack goes as well as Stingmon's. Blossomon grabs him by the talon and slams him into the ground.

Miyako: AQUILAMON!!!

Having vanquished their foes, Blossomon lets out a triumphant roar.

In the dub:

Stingmon: SPIKING STRIKE!!! (No good; Blossomon punches Stingmon) Ken: STINGMON!!! Aquilamon: GRAND HORN!!! (No good; Blossomon slams Aquilamon)

The dub takes its third commercial break here.

Yolei doesn't react to Aquilamon going down. Which kinda makes sense since she's so focused on Kari right now. Miyako's multitasking.

With this third roar, Hikari continues trembling.

Miyako: Hikari-chan! Hang in there! Hikari: I hear the voice of darkness... The darkness is swallowing me... IT'S OVE--

Suddenly, Miyako deploys what she learned from Hikari: An armor-piercing and panic-shattering slap to the face.

Miyako: Get a hold of yourself! When you hear the voice of darkness, I'll just scream and drown it out! When you're being swallowed by darkness, I'll hold your hands and bring you back! SO DON'T YOU DARE TELL ME IT'S OVER!!! Hikari: Miyako-san... Thank you.

Of note: The music that plays during this sequence is the theme from the original Adventure OVA. This is the music Hikari came in with way back when.

While Blossomon fucks off for like two minutes to go get coffee, a column of pink light pierces the dark ocean's clouds just as it did in the Dagomon episode. It slowly descends and engulfs Miyako and Hikari, and also Tailmon who's nearby.

Hikari: Hikari (light)? Miyako: That's right. Because Hikari-chan is the hikari. Your hikari can shine through any darkness. Tailmon: Miyako is right, Hikari.

Hikari hesitates for just a moment as she processes Miyako's words. Then she embraces them.

Hikari: Yeah!

With that mouth noise pretending to be a real word, their bond is forged. Hikari and Miyako's D-3s begin to glow, illuminating their Partner Digimon.

Miyako: The D-3! Aquilamon: This is....

This is Jogress, fucker!

In the dub:

Yolei: Kari, you have to talk to me or I can't help! Kari: The darkness won't leave me alone! I'll never be strong enough! IT'S GOING TO WIN!!!

This time, they don't visually censor the slap but they do play a goofy horn honk over it alongside the flesh-smacking sound effect. They didn't do that when Kari slapped Yolei.

Yolei: That's enough of that nonsense. Of course you're strong enough! You're the strongest person I've ever known! And if you think I'm going to sit by and let you run on yourself like that, you can just think again! We'll fight it together, Kari. The darkness will never beat you! Do you hear me!? Kari: Yolei, thank you. Hehe, you're a true friend. (Pink light shines down on them) Kari: ...it's beautiful. Yolei: Just like you. I forgot yours is the Crest of Light. You have the power to light up the darkness! It doesn't have a chance! Gatomon: You're the worst enemy of darkness. (Kari hesitates, then processes) Kari: Yeah! (D-3s start glowing, as do Digimon) Yolei: What's happening? Aquilamon: Ohhhh....

They completely changed Yolei's speech to Kari, which now feels a lore more individualistic. It feels focused on hyping up Kari specifically, with Yolei offering some lip service to "And I'll help you do it!" It's about Yolei reinforcing the strength Kari already possesses instead of Yolei and Kari making each other stronger. They aren't letting Kari be vulnerable in her moment of vulnerability.

I was going to speculate that they might have done this to make it less shippy but then Yolei came out with that "Beautiful just like you" bit so nuts to that. It still underserves Yolei in what is supposed to be their moment of joint actualization.

In the original, the two slap scenes parallel each other. This is what Hikari and Miyako's Jogress bond is. This is the way the two fit together and complete each other. Hikari is able to temper Miyako's enthusiasm, to bring her back down when her feelings are running away with her. And, in turn, Miyako's tactless forthrightness and strength of personality lets her punch right through Hikari's barriers so that she can fight the demons clawing at the inside of Hikari's skull.

As usual, the dub is fucked with regard to the 光 hikari wordplay. They can't stick it, so they have to bring her Crest in and do their best to emulate "Oh yeah, you have darkness-cancelling powers," without that meaningful symbolism.

With Miyako and Hikari's bond forged, their light envelops their Partners. It's finally time. TAILMON AND AQUILAMON, JOGRESS SHINKAAAAAA!!!

Sylphimon is a Perfect-stage Free-attribute Beastman Digimon. As with all the new Partners, they were created for 02 so there isn't a lot to say.

Like Paildramon, they have clear inspiration in their design for which part came from Tailmon and which part from Aquilamon. Also they're wearing Boob Plate armor over a flat, masculine chest which I find hilarious and perfect for a nonbinary design.

Their name comes from the word "sylph" which is a kind of air spirit. It's spelled correctly in Japanese, シルフィーモン Shirufiimon but the vowels got transposed in the original's Romanization of the word as "Silphymon", which appears during the rundown. The dub then just rolled with that.

Hawkmon just keeps getting screwed on his evolution names. But at least it's not as bad as the butchery done to poor Arachnemon.

Narrator: Sylphimon! Aquilamon and Tailmon Jogress Evolved into this Beastman DIgimon. Their special attacks are Top Gun and Dual Sonic. Hikari: Tailmon... Miyako: Aquilamon... Ken: ...Jogress Evolved?

In their new form, Sylphimon steps forward to confront Blossomon. Like Paildramon, their two selves can talk to each other independently, though this is the first time they've been displayed onscreen instead of just voiced individually.

Sylphimon (Tailmon): This is a Dark Tower Digimon. I'm sure of it. Sylphimon (Aquilamon): Agreed. Let's punish it!

I've said it before but I really love this aspect of Jogress Evolutions. It's such a cool way to do fusion stuff.

In the dub, they unexpectedly let the narrator do the rundown again.

Narrator: (rundown) Silphymon is the DNA Digivolved form of Gatomon and Aquilamon. Silphymon's Static Force is the ultimate weapon against darkness and hate. Kari: It has Gatomon's grace. Yolei: And Aquilamon's strength. Ken: That overgrown daisy's history. Silphymon (Gatomon): Let's send this Control Spire Digimon back to the spider in a dustpan! Silphymon (Aquilamon): I like the way you think, Gatomon.

Unlike Paildramon, the dub actually does the separation of Silphymon's identities here. It'd be difficult not to with the two faces being displayed onscreen like that.

Resolved to vanquish Blossomon, Sylphimon charges up and fires his signature move.

That's not the GIF; It really is weirdly blurry like that. I have no idea why.

Sylphimon: TOP GUN!!!

Despite the weirdly blurry chargeup animation, the attack hits its mark. In one shot, it annihilates Blossomon in an explosion that rips upwards through the woods.

Flying around on the search for the missing girls, Daisuke and Takeru spot the column of explosions.

Daisuke: What's that? Takeru: Hikari-chan!

Down on the ground, Ankylomon also notices the explosion.

Ankylomon: That way!

The blast subsides while everyone moves to meet back up with Hikari and Miyako.

In the dub:

Silphymon: STATIC FORCE!!! (Blast rips upwards through woods) Davis: LOOK OVER THERE!!! T.K.: I'll bet it's them! Ankylomon: They started without us.

Ankylomon quips but nothing really substantive to talk about.

With Blossomon destroyed, Miyako and Hikari exchange a silent look of mutual appreciation and respect.

Before their eyes, Sylphimon's evolution breaks down into Plotmon and a Baby I form for Hawkmon.

Hikari: Plotmon! Pururumon: I'm Pururumon, Miyako-san.

Pururumon's name comes from ぷるぷる purupuru, the onomatopoeia for jiggling or bouncing.

Cut to a short time later, as the sun begins to set. The rest of the team has finally found Hikari and her crew with their devolved Digimon.

Iori: Sylphimon? Daisuke: I get it! Hikari-chan's Jogress Partner was Miyako! Ken: In any case, I'll be leaving now. Miyako: Um....

Miyako stands up as if she's about to say something to stop him, but she bites her tongue. Instead, she says something to herself.

Miyako: I think I understand Ken-kun a little better now. And Hikari-chan too.

Miyako turns her attention over to Hikari and we follow that gaze. Takeru approaches Hikari.

Takeru: I was worried you'd gone away to the other world again. Hikari: (shakes head) Mm-mm. I'm okay now. I'll never have to go back to that place again.

Hikari looks over at Miyako, shooting her a smile, then reiterates.

Hikari: Not ever.

And that is where we leave off today's episode. Is this truly the last we'll hear from the dark ocean? Uh, kinda. It does have one more major appearance to turn in but not in the same context as the ones it's had thus far.

In the dub, Kari and Yolei have some thoughts to share when exchanging glances.

Kari: Wow! Yolei: Double wow! Kari: (thinking) You know, she's pretty cool. Yolei: (thinking) You know, she's pretty cool. Both: Huh? (Silphymon devolves into Pururumon and Salamon) Kari: Salamon! Pururumon: I'm Pururumon now, Yolei. (Cut to everyone catching up) Cody: Silphymon? Davis: (mocking) Rats! I guess that means Yolei is Kari's DNA Digivolve Partner! Too bad, T.O.! Ken: You're all together now. Time for me to go. Yolei: KEN!!! (Ken starts to walk away) Yolei: (thinking) There's a lot more to Ken than a pretty face. And Kari too! They fight enemies I never even see! (Yolei turns to Kari) Yolei: Ready to go? Yolei: (thinking) She won't fight them alone anymore. Not if I can help it. (T.K. approaches Kari) T.K.: I thought I'd really lost you this time. I was afraid you'd slipped into the other world for good. Kari: (shakes head) Don't worry, T.K. I have a feeling I won't be fighting it alone anymore. (Kari looks at Yolei) Yolei: Hm? Kari: Yolei won't let me. Narrator: Have Kari and Ken seen the last of the dark ocean? Will Kari's light defeat the approaching darkness? Find out on Digimon: Digital Monsters.

Ahaha, tricksy. Narrator did not promise "next time" so as long as those questions are decisively answered before the end of the show, we're in the clear.

The first time we went to the dark ocean, Dagomon ended the episode decisively in the original but was swearing revenge on Kari in the dub. Which nothing ever came of because that wasn't supposed to be a character we ever follow up on, at least not in a literal sense.

Here Kari again swaps out "I'll never have to go back there ever because of Miyako" for "Yolei will help me fight them from now on" which has a similar meaning but sounds more open-ended. As if she is once again promising more dark ocean shenanigans to come.

Davis is still being obnoxious about the love triangle, but in this case he's just making subtext into text. Daisuke does weirdly choose to look at Takeru when he says Hikari's partner is Miyako. The dub just drew out that expression into a full bit of teasing.

Assessment: This was something I was thinking about in episode 13 and I have to bring it up now because this episode really put a spotlight on it.

The dark ocean is mental illness. There were distinct shades of that in the Dagomon episode and in Ken's backstory episode, but this episode really shines a spotlight on it. I think Hikari is supposed to be schizophrenic. I think that's the intent of the metaphor.

The Dagomon episode even suggested it wasn't the first time this has happened to her and alluded to an incident with Taichi. Hikari is a chronic sufferer of lifelong visual and auditory hallucinations, and because of how she is, she just doesn't open up about it and keeps it to her own inner world. And because this is a fantasy adventure series, that gets interwoven and interconnected with her being the special girl who gets possessed and has special powers.

Takeru and now Miyako plunging into the dark ocean to help her is a metaphor for them supporting her through her condition even when it threatens to drown her. The things Miyako says to her in this episode? I'll scream louder than the voices, I'll grab your hands and pull you back. Those aren't techniques for vanquishing a great evil. They're grounding techniques to center Hikari's reality.

The dark ocean does have all kinds of rules and metaphysics and shit to it because it is a literal place within the fictional reality. But it's not... really a place. Except when it is. It is and it isn't. But it's primarily a frame of mind.

That's also why the dark ocean accepted Miyako. It's not a real place. It is a Lovecraftian-inspired realm of madness. It's not that it became real for her; It's that she stopped arguing with Hikari's hallucinations. She chose to see it so she could be there with and support Hikari on Hikari's level.

Ken, by contrast, has not been visited by the dark ocean all his life. It was the trauma of his brother's death that drove him to the dark ocean. Sometimes real-life tragedy can do that to a person. It can bring them to the dark ocean.

That's what happened to Ken in the Dark Whirlpool as well. It's why the Digimon warned Takeru not to look directly at what was below. I am now fully convinced that the Devimon entity Ken met down there is the same thing that was wearing the guise of Dagomon. Ken got what he wanted then, but he brought the madness of the dark ocean back out with him.

Is it good mental illness representation? Uh, probably not. I've been a caregiver for someone suffering from schizophrenia and I've never once considered slapping them in the face as a grounding technique. That is a terrible idea. The worst. But I do get the distinct impression that that's what this is supposed to represent.

I think this is why the dub version feels like it's struggling to find the topic. It gestures vaguely at "The ocean wants the darkness inside us" because I think it's taking the ocean a little too literally and trying to grasp at what this Metaphysical Evil Villain seeks to achieve. It's treating the dark ocean as Sauron when it's more like Pyramid Head.

[chemdisaster]

dnis are so dumb actually

like yes, sometimes it's more a case of simply separating two facets of humanity that may not be able to coexist so well for various reasons (like 18+ blogs having "minors dni" or something like that). a warning, essentially, that this blog posts things that this specific group of people might not want or need to see.

but from what i've seen, most of the time dnis basically amount to "dni if you're a horrible person". and not only is the poster's definition of "horrible person" often outlandish and absurd, but i really can't imagine any sort of actual dickhead being self-aware enough to look at the dni and go, "oh, this says dni horrible people, and i'm a horrible person, so i guess i'll click away!" like seriously, that's not how people work, no one self-identifies as a bigot or an asshole and people like that aren't likely to care about your feelings or boundaries at all. in fact, there's a chance they might look at the dni, laugh at you and take it as an invitation to harass you.

not to mention the fact that by far most of the time the stuff i've seen in people's dni does not affect them or relate to them whatsoever. it really does not affect you if a follower likes a ship you don't. it does not affect you if they have opinions different to yours that they'll never share with you because your interactions with them will never go beyond them occasionally liking and reblogging your posts. it does not fucking affect you if they refuse to harass people over fiction. and it especially has fuckall to do with you if they have a kink you don't like that you'll never know about because someone's fucking sex life is none of your goddamn business. you don't need to have a full profile of someone in order to allow them to like your posts. the world will not implode if someone who likes a different colour than you reblogs your fanart. all you will ever see of this person is their name and pfp. you do not have to go on the blog of every single person who follows you. you don't have to do anything at all whatsoever to acquaint yourself with their existence because all they will ever be to you is a stranger who clicked a button.

if someone is genuinely bothering you, then by all means, block them. but don't expect every person on this website to fall over themselves trying to properly comprehend your dni to make sure that them reblogging your posts won't make you suddenly turn to ash.

(also, to be clear - i'm not saying that every person who has a dni is a loser or something like that. just - think about what you're trying to achieve with your dni and whether it makes sense to place the responsibility of upholding your boundaries into other people's hands when the block button's right there.)

[deadsetobsessions]

Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt.3

[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.4] [Pt.5] [Pt.6] [Pt.7] [Pt.8] [Pt.9] [Pt.10]

“Aquaman.” Batman swept into the room, beelining straight for the suddenly apprehensive Atlantean king.

“Batman. What can I do for you?”

“Phantom. Does he pay taxes?”

“Pardon?”

Batman makes a low noise that had Aquaman’s danger senses buzzing.

“Does Phantom have to pay taxes. Towards Atlantis.”

“No…? Why?”

“He wanted money, in exchange for… information, of a delicate sort,” Batman said, diplomatically avoiding the topic of Phantom bargaining for the identities of corpses in exchange for a measly $100 dollars per identity. Like a flea market dealer, that one was.

“You encountered Phantom again?” Aquaman perked up.

“Yes. Gotham’s bay is… polluted.” Batman paused. “With victims. Of murder.”

The entire area quieted as heads turned towards the Dark Knight.

“Yes, I am… distantly aware of Gotham’s waters.” By that, Aquaman gets green around the gills whenever he turns his awareness in that direction. There’s a reason he doesn’t enter Gotham, and the Dark Knight’s ban is only half of that reason. “Ah, but you’re correct. For what purpose would Phantom need mortal currency?”

“Hn.”

“Maybe he needs some stuff?” Flash zipped to a stop next to Batman, feet tapping as he dug into the pile of snacks cradled in his arms. “Us mortals are always coming up with new things, maybe he wants to try some games or something?”

Batman tilted his head down, seriously considering Flash’s suggestion. “It’s plausible.”

“Barry, Barry, Barry. He’s old as hell, right? He probably wants to try the new booze!”

“Hal, my man!” Flash fist bumped Green Lantern, who came up. “You’re back! What happened to John?”

“Dunno. He got called somewhere that way,” Green Lantern waved a vague hand towards the left. “Had to deal with a politician or something from that area.” He shrugged, swinging an arm over Barry’s shoulders to put him in a headlock and stealing a chip.

“Huh. Anyways, would our mortal alcohol even work on a demi-god or something?”

“We should ask!” Hal turned towards Batman. “You should ask if he wants to go for a drink, spooky!”

“He’s a child.”

“He’s been around for more than a millennia, Bats.”

“Informational gathering, right, Hal?” Flashgot out of the headlock, quickly munching on his snacks to stop Green Lantern from stealing them.

“Totally. Yup.”

“…Fine.”

“Wait, are we just gonna ignore that Gotham’s waters are full of bodies?”

“Yes.”

——

“What?” Danny asked, mind half on the bags he’s dragging out of the water and the other half on the essay he has to submit in about four hours.

“Green Lantern wanted to invite you out for a drink.”

Danny turned to the stoic Gotham knight, who had his wrist computer out to log the bodies’ info the moment Danny gave him the information. Some of them even told Danny who murdered them, so Batman could start building cases with solid leads.

Danny’s only twenty. He’s not legal yet but he doesn’t want to give any clues to who he is. How is he supposed to…

Ah!

“Can’t.” Danny shrugged. “I’m not legal. I died when I was fourteen so…” Danny trailed off, speechless at the drowned puppy face Batman was giving him. What the fuck.

“Anyways, fork over my payment.”

Batman wordlessly hands him a wad of hundreds.

“What do you need cash for?” Batman suddenly asked.

“Huh? Isn’t it obvious?” Danny tucked it in. “Material things, obviously. I need a blanket,” because holy shit, Gotham is damn cold this time of year. “Anyways, see you same time next week, litterer.”

“I don’t litter.”

“Tell that to the batarangs I found under the water,” Danny grumbled. “But I’ll stop calling you that if you get a signature from Poison Ivy. I have a friend who loves her.”

“An alive friend?”

“Wouldn’t you like to know, weatherboy?”

Danny snickered and disappeared. He’s gotta cram that essay.

——

“There’s a possibility Phantom might be homeless.”

“Batman, I mean this in the nicest way, but for the love of Atlantis, please stop giving me headaches. It’s time like these I wish I stayed a lighthouse keeper.”

[reidalert]

IT’S OKAY NOT TO BE OKAY | spencer.reid

| spencer reid & fem!reader 3.1k words

| content: a case has you feeling helpless and guilty, and no matter who consoles you, nothing helps. maybe all you need is to take a break, but what if the break is being risky with dr. reid?

| warnings: mentions of death/kidnapping, flashback to the case, reader feeling vulnerable

| author’s note: i haven’t written in a longgg time and boy does it feel good to finally get these words out of my head. it feels like a privilege to get my writing spark back & i can’t wait to share all my ideas with you. i hope you enjoy reading <3

feedback and comments are highly appreciated!

You have thick skin.

Well, that’s what you say to anyone who asks if you’re okay.

But after today? After this case? You’re not sure if that’s true anymore. You don’t get affected easily, not when it comes to blood and gore. You’ve homed in on keeping your reactions and feelings at bay when it comes to that… but what happened out there? It’s made you feel helpless.

You knew from the minute JJ briefed you back at the BAU that this case was something you hadn’t dealt with before. Even Agent Hotchner had asked if you wanted to sit this one out.

But you said no. You wanted to get more experience to become a better profiler and a better agent. And it came at a cost.

You feel like an outsider. Like you’re watching yourself from an outside perspective as you go through airport security. The endless whir of machines and planes landing and taking off in the background do nothing for the thoughts racing in your mind.

You’re the last to be cleared and you know the others are watching you. Their eyes burning through your skin and doing what they do best. Profiling.

You don’t meet their gaze. You know as soon as you make eye contact with one of them, they’ll be asking you questions and it’ll make you torture yourself about whether you’re fit for this job. So, you make your way through the long and endless corridors until you’re at the gate for the jet.

The dull whirring of the jet engines helps you zone out. The leather seats are a cool comfort to your heated self.

Logically, it would make sense to let them know you’re not doing okay and that you need some time to yourself. But who are you kidding? You’re a thick skinned woman who can do anything… so you’ve made them believe.

You’re sitting on the farthest seat in the jet, right in the corner away from everyone else. You can’t deal with the questions you know they’re going to ask you.

But apparently, that doesn’t stop Agent Hotchner from taking the seat opposite you.

“I know what you’re gonna say.” You break the silence but continue staring out the oval window. The city lights below turn smaller and smaller as you progress through the flight.

“And what’s that?” Agent Hotchner asks. You’re not happy he’s here, invading your little self-pity bubble, but you do appreciate the way he keeps his voice quiet.

You shrug. “That something has upset me. Or that I’m too in my head about this case. Along those lines, anyway.”

Agent Hotchner regards you for a moment. You can feel his eyes staring at the side of your face as you purposefully stay looking out the window.

Because you know the second you make eye contact with him, he’ll see what’s going through your head. And he can’t.

“I gathered something was wrong.” His voice is low, a nice baritone that doesn't annoy you. “I know when someone in my team is different. And you’re different.”

You fight back the scoff that’s threatening to spill. “And what is that supposed to mean, Agent Hotchner?”

“Just…” he sighs. You’re very similar to Spencer Reid; in a way that you both struggle to admit when you need help. “If something is bothering you, I am here to listen.”

“Who says something is bothering me?” You kind of regret asking that question as you know damn well he’s about to go into an explanation of how he can see you’re upset.

He sits up a little straighter, hands clasped over his crossed knees. “You’re avoiding eye contact with me, your knuckles have turned white from how hard you’re gripping the arm rests—”

“That’s nothing—”

“You’re interrupting me. You don’t like being analysed as it makes you vulnerable. You haven’t eaten anything in the past,” Agent Hotchner checks his watch. “Six hours. Your stomach is warring against your emotions and you don’t like that. You’re sitting in a corner trying to push yourself away from other people.”

“Okay.” You bite out, now finally giving in to looking him dead in the eyes. “You’re a great profiler. No need to showboat.”

“I’m not showboating.”

You roll your eyes, “Sure seems like it.”

A minute or two pass in silence. Agent Hotchner is still staring at you and you feel incredibly small under his gaze. “What do you want me to say?”

“I don’t want you to say anything.” He fixes his shirt cuffs, acting so nonchalant as if he didn’t just profile one of his team members.

You grit your teeth. “Fine. Today messed with my head. That case was… it was wrong. So wrong that I can’t stop thinking about how I could have helped that family.”

Agent Hotchner leans forward, gently placing his hand upon your own on the arm rest. You feel your grip loosen and you fight back a grimace at how cold his hand feels against your warm one. “It’s not your fault. We all know we could have done something different out there, but sometimes the unsub takes a surprise route. Things like this happen and it’s unfortunate, but don’t blame yourself.”

You shrug again, avoiding eye contact once again. “Yeah.”

He stands, pulling his suit jacket to fit more comfortably. “If you need to talk to someone, come to my office.”

You only offer a silent nod in answer.

“Oh, and Agent L/N? Stop calling me Agent Hotchner, Hotch is just fine.” He offers a small smile and you shake your head, going back to staring out the window until your eyes feel too heavy to keep open.

“Why is there so much paperwork?” Your voice comes out all agitated as you rifle through a stupid amount of folders and loose paper.

Emily peeks over the cubicle dividing and raises an eyebrow. “You okay there?”

You sigh, slumping down onto your desk chair, spinning until you’re facing her side of the cubicle. “Do I sound okay to you? Who in their right mind decided to give me the goddamn paperwork for that goddamned case?” You glance around the wide room, trying to find JJ; this has to be her doing.

Emily purses her lips, “Doing paperwork isn’t that bad, Y/N. I mean, I guess there’s a lot but it’ll make the day go by quicker.”

“Oh, please.” You scoff, feeling yourself grow more annoyed by the minute. You know you need to get yourself in check, but the past 24 hours have ridden you like the Grim Reaper is taking jockey lessons in Hell.

“What’s got Little Miss Thick Skin so angry today?” Derek Morgan walks up to your desk, a hot mug of coffee in his hand. A brief thought had you biting your lip— it’d be wrong to spill it on him.

“Don’t start, please.” You rest your elbows on your desk, hands holding either side of your face as you stare at the paperwork. The names of the family you couldn’t save stare right back at you. Your stomach drops and you’re not sure how long you can stay in this office.

“Hey,” Derek places his mug on your desk before crouching down to your eye level. “What’s wrong, girl? If you don’t want to do the paperwork, I can take it off your hands. No big deal.”

You shake your head, “Don’t bother. I’m fine.”

Derek watches your face and you turn your head to look at him. “If you start profiling me, Morgan, I swear to God that coffee mug will end up in a place you really don’t want it.”

Derek chuckles and raises his hands in mock surrender. “Okay, girl. Just tryna help ya out.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t need help. I’m fine.” You scoot your desk chair closer and grab the closest pen, tapping it against the top of your desk to distract you from the fact you have to relive this case just a day later.

You don’t catch it, but Derek and Emily share a knowing look. They’ve seen this before. It’s not hard to notice someone you spend days on end with is struggling.

Derek grabs his mug and pats you on the shoulder. Emily sinks back into her cubicle and makes sure to keep an eye on during the day. If she finds you with smoke coming out of your ears, she’ll go get the fire extinguisher.

Your hand cramps as you write your final notes. The computer screen has turned too bright for your eyes and a headache begins to form behind your eyes. It’s been a long day.

Clicking the pen closed, you lean back against your chair with a deep sigh. You close your eyes just to rest them for a brief moment and scenes from yesterday plague you.

It’s like you can’t escape.

Your heart rate picks up speed. You’re not sure how it turned into a game of cat and mouse, but you’re adamant on putting a stop to it.

“What does he think he’s doing?” You’re standing with your palms pressed against a conference table in a police station in Washington. The projector casts a live shot of the news— a helicopter is chasing after the unsub in a car. The family you’re trying to protect is with him.

“He’s trying to flee.” Agent Rossi says, so matter of factly that it has you turning your attention to him instead.

You squint at him. “You saw this coming, didn’t you?”

He gestures to the screen. “You didn’t?”

“No, I did not.” You grit your teeth, moving so you’re now standing up straight. “I predicted he’d do something out of the blue. We all did. But we didn’t know he was going to kidnap them. That wasn’t part of his game.”

Rossi shrugs, “I’ve been in this job longer than you have, kiddo. It takes experience to know something like this. Don’t blame yourself.”

“What?” You let out a disbelieving scoff. “Listen here old man—”

“That’s enough.” Agent Hotchner cuts through your words, ending your little spat with Rossi. “We’re all here to do a job. So let’s do it.”

Faint footsteps sound behind you. You’re not sure who’s still in the office, but considering how late it is, there’s only a few people that come to mind.

“Hey, what are you doing here so late?” That all too recognisable voice makes your heart swoop. Spencer appears in your line of vision, his man-bag crossed over his torso. He looks ready to leave. “It’s nearly 7PM.”

“Oh.” You glance at the clock mounted on the wall. You didn’t realise that you were doing the paperwork for the Washington case for nearly 10 hours. “Guess I lost track of time.”

Spencer regards you for a minute. “Everything okay?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m fine.” You offer a weak smile, not trying to be bitchy to him like you were to the others earlier. You make a mental note to apologise to them tomorrow.

“It’s just— nevermind.” He shakes his head.

Your brows furrow, “No, what is it?”

“Ever since we got on that plane yesterday, you’ve been hostile.” Spencer rocks back and forth on his heels. “I know you don’t like to be profiled, I don’t either, but I know something is wrong.”

You twist in your chair, facing your computer screen with your hands hovering over the keyboard. You don’t want to talk about it, you just want to figure it out on your own.

“Y/N?” Spencer says your name and you look at him over your shoulder. His eyes all sparkly, his cheeks smooth, his lips… perfect.

You blink slowly. Your head isn’t in the right place, but your heart (and hormones) are.

You internally say fuck it and reach for the strap of his man-bag to pull him down to your level. Your breaths mingle and your eyes dart in a triangle from one eye to his lips to his other eye. And lo and behold, the triangle method actually works because Spencer leans in and you feel his lips ghost over your own.

And nothing.

He just stays in that position. Hunched down in your grip, lips mere millimetres away from your own and he doesn’t finish the job.

You breathe in a deep sigh, your senses being filled with his scent. “Why aren’t you kissing me?”

“I— I think it’s because I know you’re not yourself. It feels wrong.” Spencer's breath is minty as it fans over your cheeks and neck. You want to say something snarky, but you know he’s right. “I do want to kiss you, though. I’ve wanted to kiss you for a while now.”

You lean back a little, your eyes staring into his pretty brown ones. You don’t see a sign of a lie and your heart skips a beat. “Would it help if I admitted what’s going on? Would you kiss me then?” God, are you really that desperate to get kissed by Spencer Reid? Yes. Yes you are.

Spencer lowers into a crouch, one hand grips the armrest of your desk chair, whilst the other splays across your knee with a gentle squeeze. “If it helps you, then it’ll help me. Talk to me. Let me inside your pretty head.”

You reach out for his tie, fiddling with it to help your nerves. “You know I don’t like talking about how I feel, but this is something I can’t keep to myself anymore.”

Spencer nods, his hand on your knee giving you another squeeze. But this time in a reassuring way. That’s your go ahead sign to lay it all down.

“That case we did. The family where we couldn’t save them, where I couldn’t save them, keeps replaying in my head and I don’t know what to do to stop it.” You take a breath, your fingers still playing with his tie. “If we got there sooner, I know we could have stopped him from hurting them. From killing them. I feel like if I did or said something right or helpful, I could’ve saved them. I hate feeling like this because I know it isn’t my fault, but I just can’t help but feel guilty.”

Spencer stays quiet, letting your words sink in. “You’re right, it isn’t your fault.”

You sigh, dropping his tie and moving your attention to his face. To his lips.

“I wish I could go back in time and help.” You admit, feeling a small weight lift from your shoulders.

“I wish for that, too.” Spencer admits as well. Both of you find comfort in knowing you feel the same. It makes feeling like this just the little bit easier to deal with. “Thank you for sharing how you feel.”

You let out a small laugh. “Thank you for not dismissing me.”

“I could never dismiss you.” Spencer’s voice is soft and warm. His fingers slowly trail up and down your calf, sending a shiver through your body. “Would you like that kiss now?” The smirk on his lips has your stomach flipping and you want nothing more than for his lips to be on yours.

“I would very much like that kiss now.” You smile at him, leaning in and already feeling your body succumb to him. When your lips meet, you sigh. You’ve missed being able to be physical with him; it’s hard trying to stay colleagues when all you want is to be wrapped up in his arms.

Spencer lets his hands travel— up your thighs, round your back, cheekily up the hem of your dress. You moan lightly into his mouth and he swallows it.

Your hands grab for his collar to deepen the kiss. “More.” You mumble against his lips and he complies. Spencer bites your bottom lip to elicit a gasp from you so he can dive his tongue down your throat with ease.

You feel yourself involuntarily squeezing your thighs to quell the ache forming between your legs. God, you’d do anything to take him home with you right now.

Before you get a chance to start undoing his tie, a loud and clear cough comes from your right.

You stop moving but Spencer keeps going. Trailing open mouthed kisses along your jaw and down your neck, you now get a perfect view of Hotch standing outside his office with his arms crossed. You can’t make out what his face is portraying.

“Spence.” You tug on his collar, but he thinks you want him to go further. You feel his tongue lick a stripe up the column of your neck and you have to fight back a whimper.

You’d die on the spot if you let Aaron Hotchner hear you moaning.

“No. Spencer.” This time you push at his shoulders and the look he gives you makes you feel bad. But if you let him carry on, both of you would never be able to be in Hotch’s presence. Ever.

“Are you okay?” Spencer brushes a stray piece of hair behind your ear. “Did I do something you didn’t like?”

You shake your head, your fingers quickly straightening out Spencer's tie. “I loved it. You were good, but, um…” your eyes drift off to where Hotch is still standing.

It’s as if Spencer was zapped by lightning. He shoots back away from you, and somehow manages to hit every piece of furniture around him. You want to laugh but this situation doesn’t call for laughing. You’ve been caught by your boss making out in the middle of the BAU.

“Reid, L/N. Care to explain?” Hotch moves slowly down the stairs, his aura too strong for you to look him in the eyes right now.

You twiddle your thumbs. “He was just helping me finish this file report from the case yesterday.”

Hotch looks at Spencer, knowing that he’ll blab the truth. “She was upset about not being able to save them and I wanted to help ease her pain and—”

“That’s enough.” Hotch raises a hand. “Since it’s past working hours, I’ll make a one time allowance for this behaviour.”

You have a big sigh of relief and Spencer lets out an audible groan of embarrassment. “Sorry, sir. It won’t happen again.”

“You’re right. It won’t.” Hotch checks his watch and frowns. “I’m late for something. Finish that report and I’ll see you both tomorrow. Behaving correctly.”

You nod your head and Spencer keeps his head down staring at the floor. You watch Hotch leave the office and you finally let out your cringing grimace. “I am so sorry. I didn’t know he was here. I thought he left already.”

“I can’t be mad. I got to kiss the prettiest girl in here.”

“Shut up.”

Copyright credit to @reidalert as of 2024-present.

[deepspacenova]

something that is both heartwarming and heartbreaking about Caleb is the way he consistently continues to fight his fate, despite every sign he encounters pointing toward its inevitability:

it's in the way he defies the Toring Chip, and the meaning of 7%

When Caleb falls apart on the bench with MC and the chip resets in Farspace Bloomfall, 100% of his mind is supposed to reset.... and yet only 93% of the chip is integrated and able to do so.

We know Caleb is aware of this too, when he tells MC to tell him about her problems “while I can still respond.” Because he knows he'll inevitably lose some information once it happens, like the 'patrol data' Enforcer mentions.

This means it’s happened before, Caleb's mind had been reset before. Which means, he knows if the chip’s integrity ever gets to 100% and resets, anything he feels toward MC will also reset. And so..

“…he’s purposefully ‘sealed’ his brain rather than damaging it.”

So Caleb gathered up every emotion, every memory, and every impression of MC in his mind, wrapped it all together into one small piece, and has since, against all odds, continuously used his Evol to put a barrier around it, to protect it. To keep the chip from finding it and wiping it. And what is that piece? That 7%?

7% is MC. 7% is his memories of MC. 7% is his love for MC.

it's in the way he's turned himself from "perfect weapon to destroy each other" to "perfect weapon to destroy others"

I could be wrong (please correct me), but I'm pretty sure it's murky right now whether Caleb (subject 002?) knew MC during any of her 'incarnations' in the lab and/or their purposes to be a killswitch for each other. But if he does know or remember any of it, the protection of that 7% from the Toring Chip becomes even more vital and strategic as all hell.

Because that would mean Caleb orchestrated a situation where he's become the lab subject, a decoy in MC's place as they try and correct the chip within him.

And that would mean that Caleb planned for them to "sacrifice a great deal to obtain him," — apparently, so much that they're unwilling/unable to simply dispose of him when he's resisting the very thing that would seal his fate as "the key", as MC's killswitch.

and it's in the literal beat of his heart

when you lay your hand over caleb's heart to hear his heartbeat, no matter how fast that beat starts out, if you hold your hand there long enough, his heartbeat inevitably tapers into a calm 50-60.

Despite all he's doing to preserve that 7%, he can't fight the nature of the other 93%. The nature of the chip and it's purpose to keep him in an emotional stasis.

His excitement to see you, his happiness to have you there, the fluttering of his heart? Those are abnormalities to the chip, those aren't in line with what that stasis is supposed to be. And so... no matter how quickly his heart beats for you initially, it inevitably gets suppressed.

We see how it affects other members of the Fleet too. How all of them have accepted the inevitability of the chip. Tuum Officer No. 6025 and Liam in particular shows us exactly what it looks like to give in.

And yet, every time you come back, Caleb's still excited, Caleb still fights it. He's fighting it with only 7% of his memory, he's fighting it with every quickened beat of his heart.

If the chip is a tether, if his fate is a tether, Caleb will never stop sawing at the strings, and i am not okay about it.

blame for any and all crash outs can be directed to @solifloris and @starmocha, who have managed to make my "down bad" for caleb turn into "sick to my stomach with eternal devotion"

[prettycalla]

|| here for a moment ||

Pairing: Eddie/Reader

Summary: Eddie stays over at your place, and you help him with his hair.

Word count: 1.6k

Tags and warnings: Fluff, established relationship, no use of Y/N.

(Did I have any clue what I was doing when I wrote this? No. Does it make sense? Man, I hope so. Just wanted an excuse to write some fluffy Eddie while I'm working on a Caracalla request.)

Masterlist || Join the taglist!

It's a funny sort of domestic routine you've both fallen into.

At this point, Eddie's probably staying at your place more than he is his own. He has his own drawer for his clothes in your bedroom, and his tapes and books are slowly starting to mix in with yours.

Neither of you have been able to brave the talk about moving in together just yet, but you're comfortable and happy with the way things are right now. Why try and fix what isn't broken, right?

You're curled up on the couch one evening with a handful of takeout menus in front of you, trying to decide what to order for dinner. You hear Eddie come out of the bathroom, a wall of steam flooding out behind him. His hair is a tangled, dripping mess hanging over his face as he tries to wrestle his still-wet ass back into his boxers, hopping precariously on one foot.

"Eddie, for Christ's sake," you say with a groan as you catch him from the corner of your eye.

Ever prepared for your boyfriend's antics, you take the pyjamas you'd laid out for him - an old band t-shirt and plaid bottoms - and toss them across the room.

"You're an angel. Thanks, baby," Eddie replies, letting his boxers drop to his ankles as he picks up the clothes laying on the ground.

You roll your eyes. He's gonna be the death of you.

He dresses himself, struggling to push his soaking wet hair out of his face as he heads for your bedroom.

"Do you have a comb or something I can borrow?" he calls. "Never mind, found your brush!"

You immediately scramble after him, snatching the brush out of his hand before he has a chance to put it anywhere near the bird's nest that sits on his head.

"Don't you dare," you grumble, setting it back on the dresser. "You'll break it."

Eddie pulls a face. "Well, what am I supposed to do? I don’t have anything with me," he says.

You grab the sleeve of his T-shirt in reply, pulling him with you as you find a towel and make your way back to the living room. You sit down on the couch, tossing a cushion on the floor in front of you.

"Sit there," you tell him.

He looks at you, confused, but does as you say, settling himself between your legs. You gather up sections of his hair with the towel, gently pressing it in an attempt to soak up some of the water.

"Y'know, it might be easier if you just let me run around outside and shake myself dry," he jokes.

"That's not a bad idea, actually," you reply with a mischievous smile. "I mean you eat and shed like a dog. Should probably make you sleep out there too."

Eddie turns to you, pretending to be offended, and you drop the damp towel over his face. With a strangled yelp, he snatches it away, glaring at you. Or tries to, at least. His hair is all over his face again. You can't help but laugh at him.

"You're so mean," he says, and you can hear the pretend pout in his voice.

You lift the towel again and continue where you left off.

"Oh, I am not," you reply, "Would I be doing this for you if I was so mean, huh?"

You run your fingers along his neck, pulling a laugh from him.

"Huh?" you insist, smiling.

"No, you wouldn't," Eddie relents grouchily. "Because you're perfect. Best thing that's ever happened to me. Happy now?"

He says it a silly, exaggerated voice, and yet you can't help the little breath that hitches in your throat.

"You mean that?" you ask quietly, dropping the pretence of arguing.

Eddie pushes his hair out of his eyes and leans his head back to look up at you, big brown eyes full of sincerity.

"'Course I do," he murmurs. "You are the best thing that's ever happened to me."

You lean down to press a kiss to his lips. He kisses you back, and you can feel him smiling against you.

"Except maybe my guitar," he mutters against your mouth, his soft smile quickly turning into a shit-eating grin.

You lightly smack his arm in reply. He just laughs.

"I can just leave you to do this yourself, y'know," you tell him, as if it wasn't your idea to begin with.

"Oh, that's fine," Eddie replies with a nonchalant shrug. "I can take care of it, no problem."

He starts slowly shaking his head back and forth, and your eyes widen.

"Eddie," you warn, "Don't you dare."

You shriek as Eddie violently shakes his head, sending water everywhere. You're off the couch in an instant, tackling him to the ground to make him stop.

"I take it back, you're worse than a dog," you scold.

Eddie doesn't say anything, just looking up at you from the floor.

"What?" you ask, a little nervously.

He always freaks you out when he goes quiet like that.

"Eddie," you try again, chewing at your bottom lip.

Eddie smiles up at you, a slow, lazy smile that brings out his dimples. He shakes his head.

"Nothing," he finally replies. "Just wondering how I got so damn lucky, that's all."

A blush creeps over your face at his words. How does he manage to be both a pain in the ass and the sweetest guy in the world at the same time? You tell him as much, and he dramatically clutches at his chest.

"I'm wounded," he says, straining his voice for effect.

He's a nuisance at the best of times, but you can't help the fondness you have for him. He makes you laugh until you're in tears, listens to you like you're the only person in the world that matters. Makes you feel safe, even at your worst. He's like no one you've ever met.

"Still with me, sweetheart?" he calls softly.

You nod, embarrassed that you were clearly caught staring. Eddie lets his hands wander to the hem of your shirt, tugging at the fabric gently.

"C'mere," he says, his tone uncharacteristically shy all of a sudden.

You frown at him, confused, until he reaches up, pressing his hand to the back of your neck and pulling you down to kiss him. It's soft and slow and everything Eddie lets himself be when he's around you.

You could easily let yourself stay there all night, wrapped up in his arms - if Eddie's hair wasn't currently leaving a slowly spreading puddle across the floor. You reluctantly pull away from him, pressing a little kiss to the tip of his nose as you sit up.

"Come on, get up," you say, as you manage to climb off him and back onto the couch. "I'm not done with you yet."

Eddie just blinks up at you. "I wasn't done with you," he grumbles, eventually dragging himself into a sitting position again.

You bite back a smile, refusing to take the bait as you continue where you left off. Once you're satisfied that you're no longer under threat of being soaked again, you drop the towel on the floor, focusing your efforts on trying to detangle the mess of hair in front of you. You begin prying his curls apart gently with your fingers, taking care to ease out the little knots so as not to hurt him.

Eddie tries to make an effort to look through the takeout menus you'd forgotten about, but after a while, his interest wanders as you work at his hair. He's clearly enjoying the attention, if the little hums escaping him are anything to go by.

“You doing okay down there?” you ask with a little laugh.

“Sweetheart, this is fuckin’ heaven, you know that?” he says lazily.

He sounds as though he’s about to fall asleep, and judging by the way his head is starting to droop, he probably is. You reach around to give him a soft tap on the cheek and he jerks upright again.

"Hey, sleepyhead, don't doze off on me. I'm almost done, okay?" you say gently.

He just grunts in response as he tries to rouse himself. You're not faring much better if you're honest - the repetitive motion of separating his curls, as well as Eddie's weight and warmth against you, is strangely soothing.

Eventually, you've done about as much as you can, and you gently shake Eddie by the shoulder. He lets out a very attractive snort as he jolts out of the doze he'd drifted into.

"All done," you tell him. "Well, it's the best I could do."

Eddie turns around, leaning his arms against your legs.

"What would I do without you?" he asks, smiling up at you.

You lightly squeeze his face between your hands.

"Do you really want me to answer that?" you ask in turn, your tone teasing.

Eddie laughs, gently pulling your hands away from his face to press a kiss to each of them.

"You're on menu duty until I get back, okay?" you tell him.

He gives you a little salute as you grab the towel from the floor and stand up, stretching your back out as you do. Eddie immediately dives for the couch as soon as you're up.

"Aw, babe, you kept my seat warm for me," he teases with a little grin.

You roll your eyes at him as you head to the bathroom. Eddie watches you go before focusing on the very important task you've set him.

“Eddie?" you shout from the bathroom, "Did you use all of my shampoo?!"

If the empty bottle in your hand wasn't proof enough, the loud thump as he falls off the couch in a frantic scramble to get out of your line of fire certainly is.

(banners by @ cafekitsune)

[malfoy-mrsdracomalfoy]

Potions Partner

Pairing: Draco Malfoy x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Strong language, some bullying

Word Count: 4268

Summary: Fem!Reader is Draco's Potions partner and has struck his fancy. The catch? The feelings are not mutual. Draco is determined to change that.

Author's Note: This is a slow burn.

Reader's Point Of View:

Draco, my so-called Potions partner is sitting next to me- not paying attention as per usual. Apparently his conversation with Crabbe and Goyle can't wait until class is dismissed. In a lull in conversation, Draco glances over at me, acknowledging my presence for the first time ever.

"Oi, girl." He says, turning his full attention to me.

I look up from my notes to him. "What?" I'm already annoyed I turned in our essay that was supposed to be a team effort to Professor Snape. The only part Draco contributed to it was writing his name on the corner under mine.

He smirks, leaning back in his chair. "Just making sure you're not too busy trying to understand something too complicated for someone like you."

"Oh how thoughtful of you." I say sarcastically, rolling my eyes. his smirk widens at my response, genuinely finding amusement in bothering me.

"You find yourself to be clever, yeah? Talking to me like that."

"Like what, then?"

"Sassy. It's rather cute that you think you're just going to get away with that."

I give him an unimpressed look before promptly looking back at my notes, trying to tune into Snape's lecture again. Finally, the trio falls into silence after Snape gives them a very heavy glare. That doesn't shake Draco enough to leave me be. I feel his eyes on me just about the entire lecture- not taking any notes of his own.

I turn my body away from him so he can only see the back of my robes- feeling annoyed and slightly self-conscious.

After a few minutes, Snape dismisses class and I gather all my things and haul out of the classroom, walking quickly through the crowd of students. Draco catches up with me, matching my pace as I walk. Does this guy really not have anything else better to do?

"You know, every girl in this school would drop their knickers for me- why are you acting like you're better than any of them?" He says, clearly taking an ego hit with my lack of interest. I let out a laugh of disbelief. "Do you actually believe that? I mean you actually believe that most girls want to 'drop their knickers' for you?" I say, mimicking his accent when I repeat his repulsive comment. His smirk returns full force.

"Without a doubt. I could have any girl in this school. Hell, I could have half the professors, too." He says arrogantly, watching me intently for my reaction.

"Oh! Professors as well? Wow! You're really something." I say, voice mocking. His eyes slightly narrow at my tone.

"I bet you're jealous you're not one of the girls I want."

"More like I'm not one of the girls you can have." I look at him, small smirk forming.

"You're not even pretty." He says, testing my reaction. I bet he expects me to wilt like a flower.

"No? Pity. I so badly wanted to be called pretty by someone like you." I say sarcastically. His smirk widens as if he's enjoying someone pushing back to his insults.

"You're rather ugly." He says, waiting for me to snap back to him.

"Ugly? How will I ever bounce back from this heart-breaking insult? I am SO wounded." I say, keeping my sarcastic tone. He laughs softly before he covers it with his usual smirk.

"You're a bloke repellant. I mean, look at you. You have no tits or ass." He adds, clearly trying to offend me.

"Oh, you've been looking, then?" I stop us mid-walk and turn to look at him fully. A challenge. His eyes widen briefly, caught off guard by my quick comeback.

"You know what I mean." He runs his gaze over me deliberately this time. "You have no redeeming qualities." I watch his eyes carefully, smugly noticing that he's checking me out under the guise of judgement.

"You say that but your eyes lingered a little longer than they should've."

"Fuck off." He says gruffly, turning away to hide his face.

"You started this. I'm just finishing it. I always finish what I start." I say, wanting to throw him off with an unexpected innuendo to catch his reaction. He slowly turns back, his smirk back in place.

"You shouldn't talk like that." His voice drops lower. "It makes a bloke think things."

"I'm not in charge of the innerworkings of a man's mind." I give him a once over. "Besides. I don't know why you're hassling me about my looks. You have no room to talk." He laughs genuinely, seemingly unphased.

"At least I have a dick." He says, trying to shock me but I spy his hands slightly shaking at my newfound confidence. "You probably don't even know what one looks like."

"A dick? What's that?" I pretend to be confused.

He stares at me for a moment, speechless. Then, he bursts out laughing- loud and uninhibited.

"You're fucking with me right now." He says between chuckles.

"Obviously." I say, confident and standing tall.

He shakes his head as he stop laughing, keeping a smile on his face. He takes a step closer.

"You know what would really fuck with me right now?"

"I have a feeling you'll tell me even if I don't ask."

"Smartarse." His blue eyes hold mine intently. "I'd be really fucked right now if you just.. for once.. stop being such a clever fucking witch and just admit you find me attractive." His voice is barely above a whisper, and I spy a hint of vulnerability in his eyes. I knew he cared about my opinion even though he acts like he's unbothered by anything. I pretend to be thoughtful for few moments.

"Hm. No."

His face breaks into a grin, clearly amused by my denial.

"You're seriously telling me that I'm standing here practically begging you to admit I turn you on..."

I smirk. "I rather like a begging man." I say, pleased I have the upper hand now. He stares at me for a moment, shocked again by my direct approach.

"Fuck, you're infuriating." He says with a low chuckle, his eyes never leaving mine.

"Oh, yeah?" I tilt my head to the side, smirk in place.

He steps even closer, his voice challenging. He wants to push me. I bet he wonders how far he can go before I actually snap or give in. "You know what your problem is?"

"I drive men wild with my charm?"

His eyes flicker down to my lips briefly before meeting my gaze again. He smirks, his voice low and seductive "No, your problem is you have no idea how attractive you are when you're being a sassy little bitch."

"Attractive?" I remark with a smirk. He watches me for a second, an amused grin taking over his face.

"Shut up."

"No, I don't think I will." I shift slightly, popping my hip out and crossing my arms. I know exactly what I'm doing. He's going to eat his words and regret he ever made any sort of sexist comment about my appearance. His eyes flick down to my hip, taking in the newfound curves it gives me.

"Stop moving like that." He says, trying to look annoyed but his eyes betray him. He finds me attractive whether he admits it to himself or not.

"Or what?" I say, holding his gaze, eyebrow raised. This was his last straw.

His hand reaches out and grabs me by my hips, pulling me flush against him. "Or I might just have to show you exactly what your smart mouth and sassy attitude do to me." I chuckle. I win.

"You're trouble, and not the fun kind." I say, pulling slightly back- I'm not that easy to get. I feel his fingers dig into my hip slightly, holding me in place. He leans down, his face inches from mine.

"You're the kind of girl that every bloke wants but wouldn't dare try. Too hard to get. Too much hassel."

"But you're not like most guys- are you?" I smirk up at him, pleased I have him in my web now. His grip on my hip tightens as he smirks back, his voice a low growl.

"No. I actually have the balls to go after what I want."

"What is it that you want?"

He releases my hip suddenly, his hands coming to frame my face as he backs me against the wall. "I want you. Your mouth, your attitude... I want to see if you're as fiery in bed as you are out of it." He pauses, face inches from mine. I nearly laugh out loud. As if he think it'll be that easy.

"Not going to happen." I smirk, looking over his features. "I like how boldly you declared that though."

His expression turns embarrassed at my rejection but he quickly covers it with anger. He steps back, his hands balling into fists at his sides. "Fine. Keep acting like you're too good for me, then." He turns to leave but pauses at the door, looking back over his shoulder.

"Something to add?" I say, amused at his ego hit. He needed to be taken down several notches.

"You're so busy being the 'unattainable girl' that you miss out on having any fun." He smirks mirthlessly. "I can have anyone I want. At least those girls know how to act on their desires. They're not stuck up like you." With that parting shot, he storms out of the room.

"Wow. Good insult." I say sarcastically, laughing slightly as I adjust my skirt. "Drama king."

ONE WEEK LATER

Over this last week, Draco has started a subtle campaign of flirtation and teasing me, testing the waters to see if I'll react. He's constantly finding moments alone with me to drop hints or remarks. In between classes, during study hall, even through the dark hallways at night. He's persistent, I'll give him that.

Feeling like I'm falling behind in Potions due to Draco's 'subtle' touches and his loud conversations with his friends- I decide I need to buckle down and head to the library. I refuse to get anything less than an 'Outstanding' because of him.

LIBRARY

Thankful for the silence of the library- I take my favorite seat in the back where there's low foot traffic. I work diligently for a few minutes before I hear an unexpected sound- a swoosh and something with claws landing on wood. I stop my quill mid-air as I still, listening for the sound and looking around- wondering if it's my owl. On a bookshelf about three rows down, my eyes land on an Eurasian Eagle Owl. The owl watches me for a moment before turning and promptly flying out the closest open window.

Turning my eyes back to my essay, I jump back onto my train of thought I had just moments ago. For a while, the only sound in the library is the scratching of my quill on parchment and the occasional page flip.

That is until I hear the creak of the library door opening. I sigh, annoyed that there's going to be someone in here with me. I was hoping for absolute isolation and silence. I hear footsteps approaching- so I look up.

"Hey, beautiful." The smooth and confident voice of Draco floats to me before he reaches me with his usual stride- chest squared and shoulders slightly back.

"Draco." I say casually, turning my attention back to my homework.

"I missed you today. How's your day been?" He presses on, smirk on his face.

"I'm working on an essay. I would appreciate silence."

He takes the seat next to me, raising his hands in surrender as he turns to face the table, grabbing his own things out. I'm granted a few moments of quiet to focus on my homework.

"Y/n?" Draco says, voice quiet.

"What?" I say, turning my head to the side to look at him.

"I forgot my potions book. Can I borrow yours?" He asks, smirk in place. "Or we can share."

"Yeah, go on. I'm done with it anyway."

He leans over to 'borrow' the book. As he reaches across me, his arm brushes against my chest deliberately. He pauses for a moment longer than necessary before setting the book down in front of him. "Thanks." He says, looking smug.

I roll my eyes and scoot a chair away from him. Why was he sitting right next to me, anyway? The whole library is empty. I roll my eyes and pull out my Charms textbook, taking notes.

He notices my slight movement away from him but doesn't comment on it. Instead, he leans back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head. His shirt rides up slightly, revealing a strip of his toned stomach. "It's hot in here, isn't it?" He comments, looking at me with a smirk.

"Actually, I'm rather cold. Must be a draft from the air of superiority that surrounds you."

He raises an eyebrow, a smirk playing on his lips. "Always the sharp tongue. I should have known better than to expect anything less from you." He leans towards me, resting his elbows on the table. I hear the library door open again, and a few students shuffle in and take the table a few rows over.

"Must you be here? Couldn't you be anywhere else?" I say, rolling my eyes and turning my attention back to my notes.

He chuckles softly, the sound low and mocking. "And miss out on our banter? No thank you. Plus, my owl found you for me. You should be honored." He watches me from the corner of his eye, his quill moving idly across the page as he pretends to work on his own homework.

I shake my head and turn away so he doesn't see the smile that creeps across my features. I shouldn't find that flattering, it's creepy. He sent his owl to look for me so he can come bother me. But, he must have caught my smile because he smirks which turns into a full blown grin. He knows he's getting to me.

He pushes a little further by 'accidentally' dropping his quill on the floor right between our two chairs. "Oops." He remarks casually, bending over to pick it up- his soft, platinum locks tickling the bare skin of my arm.

"You're not nearly as slick as you think you are." I say. When he raises his head from picking up his quill, he lingers a few moments- his face level with mine. I spot a teasing glint in his ice blue eyes.

"And you're not as unaffected as you pretend to be."

"Shut up." I say, turning from him to hide my shy smile.

"You're feisty tonight." He pauses, letting his sentence hang in the air before continuing. "But I must say... it suits you."

"Everything does." I shrug casually, pretending to focus on my notes.

An amused smile settles over his lips. "You know what your problem is?" He leans forward, his voice dropping conspiratorially. "You're too smart."

"Oh, yeah?" And you know what YOUR problem is?"

He leans back again, his gaze never faltering. "No doubt I'm going to enjoy hearing this." His smirk returns full force as he waits.

"You think you're being charming and persistent, but you're just flat out annoying. Like a fly buzzing in someone's ear."

This time, he laughs out loud. "You're harsh."

"If you think that's harsh, you should hear the things I don't say out loud."

His smirk returns slowly. "Need I remind you that most girls would kill to even be seated next to me?"

"So they can choke on your expensive cologne? It's far too strong and you have too much of it on."

The eavesdropping students a few tables over laugh quietly and glance over, obviously finding this banter entertaining. Draco catches their eye and they look away quickly, pretending to work again.

"You really don't care about my reputation, do you?" He asks incredulously.

"Should I?"

His smirk widens but he says nothing more. Taking his silence as the end of our conversation, I reopen my textbook- aware of his dangerously close proximity. I take advantage of the silence, finishing up my homework and standing to go. Draco murmurs a small "see you later." as I pass him by, which I return, then I leave the library- feeling a little more warmth to a certain blonde Slytherin with an ego that's too big but a charm that's far bigger.

POTIONS CLASS

As I lean over to read a small caption in my Potions textbook, my hair falls into my face. Before I get a chance to move it- I jump at the feeling of gentle fingers pull it back for me. Once the strands are tucked behind my ear, the warm fingers of Draco Malfoy linger on the skin of my cheek for longer than necessary.

When I glance up to meet his eye, he smirks- pulling his chair closer to me before he sits down. He leans closer to me, his voice low and husky when he speaks. "May I borrow your notes?" He asks softly. "Please?"

"If you must." I tease, sliding my notes over to him. His lips twitch slightly at my teasing response. He copies my notes quickly, and Crabbe and Goyle slide chairs to join us at the table. Draco hands them my notes to borrow as well.

"Oh sure, pass them around." I mumble, rolling my eyes and leaning back in my chair. "You're lucky I was done with them."

Draco chuckles softly. I watch as he passes my notes around the table which is somehow bustling with various members of his clan coming to copy my notes before leaving. I watch them flip through my pages with impressed murmurs.

"Damn, y/n." Says one of the Slytherins. I couldn't tell who because I don't know half their names.

I glance over at him, some tall guy with shaggy brown hair. The Slytherin leans forward conspiratorially before he glances over at Draco. "I never thought I'd see Malfoy sitting next to someone that's smarter than him." He winks at me before moving away to his own table. As fast at they came, Draco's clan left.

"Well, this was odd." I say, organizing all my notes that have been returned to me, "No thanks to you. Distributing my notes like it was the morning paper."

Draco smirks at my sarcastic comment, leaning back in his chair with a lazy grace. He watches me intently- his eyes never leaving my face. When I look up at him, he raises an eyebrow. "I was just helping." He says, his tone mock innocent.

"Yeah, helping. Real helpful bloke you are." I say sarcastically, "You'd help me right over a boat's dock into shark-infested waters."

His smirk widens at my comeback. "Well, at least I'd still be helpful. You wouldn't have to do it yourself."

"Funny." I give him an unimpressed look- "And is that what you call yourself? I have a few other choice words in mind. 'Helpful' is not one of them."

He laughs softly, the sound genuine and warm. I really enjoy this banter with him, and I even enjoy him chasing me. It's fun.

"What would you call it then?"

"Annoying." I say, point-blank. He laughs a little louder this time, drawing the attention of some nearby students. He ignores them, focused on me entirely. "Annoying?" He repeats, still smiling, "I'll take that as a compliment coming from you." His eyes sparkle with amusement.

"What are you even doing right now? You've just been sat in that position for the last half hour and you've not gotten one thing done." I gesture to his open textbook and blank parchment. Well, he did have one page of notes done but only because he copied mine. He follows my gaze to his untouched book, still on page 394.

He shrugs nonchalantly. "Maybe I find other things more interesting than studying right now." He says smoothly.

"Does your incessant flirting ever cease?"

He leans back in his chair, a playful glint in his eye as he replies, "Not when I'm enjoying myself this much." He pauses, "And not when I'm around someone who keeps my attention so well." I look at him for a few moments. He's effectively wearing me down with his persistence and I am starting to form a small crush on him that I quickly suppress because there's no way I want him to know he's right about being wanted by every girl.

"You know what your problem is?"

He raises an eyebrow, his lips curling into a smirk as he waits for my response. "Enlighten me." He says, voice low and inviting. "What's my problem?"

"You stare unrelentingly at me. You remind me of a snake watching its prey."

His smirk widens at my analogy. He leans forward again, maintaining direct eye contact. "And what if I am? Do you know how rare it is to find someone who can actually handle my stare?" His voice drops lower, "Most avoid it."

"Your stare is quite intense, isn't it?" My eyes flicker between both of his ice blue ones.

"Some people say my stare is intimidating. My mother swears I inherited from my father." He laughs softly, "What do you think?"

"You really don't want to know what I think." I laugh softly to myself, tucking my things away to busy myself- small smile in place.

He watches me tuck away my things for a second before he stands up abruptly, making the chair scrape loudly against the floor and steps right behind me. "I do want to know." His voice comes from behind me, his figure towering. I feel suddenly flustered.

"Have you no decorum? We're still in class." I shuffle slightly in my seat. I feel him lean down slightly- his lips close to my ear.

"But you're here next to me, looking so good..." He whispers, "I'm not bothering anyone else, am I?" His breath tickles my neck.

"No, you've just stuck with bothering me."

He lets out a low chuckle, his chest vibrating on my back. I feel his presence almost completely now. I can't help but imagine what it would be like to be under him in a different scenario.

Noticing how quiet it's become, I glance around to see that at some point class was dismissed and Draco and I were left behind. We are the only ones left in the entire classroom.

"Only because you're the most interesting thing in the room," He admits quietly, "You don't back down from my snark, you speak your mind..."

I turn to smirk up at him, faces inches apart. "Soon, you'll be writing me love letters like a pining admirer."

He rolls his eyes at my teasing, but I see a small smile tug at his face. "Don't push your luck." He says without any real heat behind his words. "My handwriting is atrocious."

"Oh, so it's fitting for your personality then?"

He laughs genuinely, looking over my features, clearly enjoying this verbal sparring and extremely close proximity. "Touché" He grins, "You really are quite... sharp." His eyes flick down to my lips briefly before he settles his gaze on my eyes again. "Incredibly witty."

"Don't forget beautiful." I tease, voice playful.

"Beautiful, witty, and annoying as hell." He mutters, his voice affectionate. "The perfect combination."

I give a small smile, shaking my head up at him. "You're being far too nice. What are you up to?"

Realizing he's been slowly shedding his flirty advances for something more meaningful, he clears his throat and regains his composure- standing back upright and heading back to his seat, sitting down stiffly. "Nothing." he says, "Just enjoying the banter with a girl who can actually keep up." He pauses.

"Oh. Is that all?" I smirk at him, already missing his close proximity.

"What else would it be?" He challenges, his voice low. "You think I'm flirting with you?"

"Oh, you're absolutely flirting with me. That's what's been happening."

He stares at me for a long moment.

"Then let me be clear." He says, his voice low and intense. His eyes lock onto mine as he leans in closer. "I am not just flirting with you." He says firmly, "I am courting you. There's a difference." He pauses, letting the words sink in. "And I don't do this with just anyone." I look at him thoughtfully for a moment.

"I like you, y/n." Draco says, holding my gaze. "I'm not pursuing you for a shag. I think you're beautiful, and clever, and witty, and brilliant and I like spending time with you and talking to you."

"Draco.." I start softly.

"Y/n. Please." He says, cutting me off. "Let me finish. Yeah?" He looks at me, waiting for my nod. When he gets it, he continues.

"I want to spend more time with you. Intentional time. I want to pursue a romantic relationship with you. Are you willing to try with me?" He reaches out to take my hand, intertwining our fingers before setting them in my lap.

"Yes, Draco. I am willing to try with you." I say, finally allowing my carefully constructed walls to begin cracking. I have a feeling it'll be a long journey for the both of us but I also know it'll be worth it.

Masterlist

[kp-alice]

Prove Her Wrong

Summary: Yunho knew that what that stranger had said to him back then wasn't true. He quite literally had physical evidence to prove it. And yet, he couldn't help but think about her comment a little too often.

AKA a well-endowed-and-very-desperate!sub!Yunho x bored!dom!f!reader

Word count: 3 820

Warnings: small-dick humiliation, roleplaying (reader pretends to be bored and unsatisfied), degradation (but no name-calling), mid-scene checking in, just another case of me writing about pathetic Yunho because I can't help myself and definitely have issues

A/N: This fic is the third part of my sub!Yunho Kinktober 2024! The event's masterlist can be found here.

"...and then she told me 'I have no right to act like an overcompensating asshole just because my dick is small'."

"Ouch," you hissed empathetically. "Yeah, I can definitely see how that would hurt for a while, even if she was totally wrong."

"That's uh, that's the thing," Yunho retorted nervously, shifting in his spot, "I kinda, well, liked it? I guess? Like- not because of her saying it, but because of what she said, you know?"

The silence between the two of you stretched to an uncomfortable degree, making Yunho chuckle nervously. "It's not too weird, is it?"

"Hmm, no, it's definitely weird," you concluded at last, eyebrows furrowed.

"...But I'd love to learn more about it."

"Wait," you said, sitting up straight on the couch, "so I'm supposed to have sex with you, but like, act like your dick is small and it's not doing anything for me?"

Yunho's blush deepened at your words, curling into himself even further. "I mean, when you put it like that, it does sound really weird, I'm sorry."

"No, honey," you said, leaning over to place a comforting hand on his thigh, "I wasn't saying it to make fun of you, I just want to make sure I understand it all correctly so that I don't mess up when we eventually try it."

"We seriously don't have to, though," Yunho opposed, starting to backtrack now that the nerves had caught up to him again. "It really is quite odd, and the last thing I want to do is push your boundaries just to please me and my weird kinks."

You sighed. This wasn't the first time Yunho had gotten like this when it came to talking about his needs and wants. No matter how many times you'd try to reassure him that it's fine to ask for things, it always took just a short moment of uncertainty for him to begin retracting back into his shell. "Yu, I've already told you that I'm completely fine with trying it. Sure, it's not something I'd personally bring up, but I'm not opposed to it either. Who knows, maybe I'll also end up liking it? Either way, I'm really not pushing myself to do anything, nor am I planning to do so. Just trust me, okay?"

"Okay," Yunho finally conceded, giving you a small smile. His hand found yours on his thigh, grasping it gently. "Thank you."

"Anytime, love," you smiled back, rubbing your thumb against the back of his hand. "Now, how about you elaborate on your little fantasy a bit more, hm? I need to know all of what I'm going to do to you."

A shiver ran down Yunho's spine at the words, visible excitement lighting up his eyes.

"Oh, we're going to be here a while."

After an open conversation or two with your boyfriend, you were finally ready to indulge him.

Yunho didn't want to set a specific date, though, feeling as though it would make the scene too staged and unnatural. So, instead, the two of you decided to just wait and use a non-verbal signal. If Yunho were to initiate sex while wearing a specific small blue bracelet, it was your sign to start the play if you felt up for it.

There were a couple false alarms of sorts, where Yunho would wear the bracelet the whole day, but would never actually gather the courage to initiate. You knew this was something that might happen, and yet you couldn't help the small twinge of disappointment whenever you went to bed with nothing from his side. You also suspect he might have worn it at least once just to tease you, but you didn't dare ask.

Then, it was your turn to decline a couple times. It wasn't payback for Yunho's nervousness in any way, obviously. It just so happened that the first two times when he'd tried to finally initiate, you were either not in the mood in general, or were up for something more soft and loving. And just as you had with him before, Yunho also completely understood your preferences, boundaries, and pace.

But then, one fateful night, things were finally put into motion.

You were lounging on the couch, watching TV while mindlessly scrolling on your phone. Yunho wasn't home yet, having to stay at work longer than expected today. You wouldn't have to wait much more, however, as you heard the front door opening just a few moments later.

Already from the sound of his heavy footsteps trudging down the hallway, you could tell he was tired. Then, a small thud resonated through the living room, making you sit up and look behind you.

There, Yunho slouched against the doorway, pouty and puppy-eyed. His hair was disheveled, likely from running his hands through it countless times from all the extra stress today.

"Hey there, love," you said warmly, turning his pout into a small smile.

"Hey," he replied sluggishly before pushing himself upright again to take off his jacket.

Which, to your surprise, revealed the blue bracelet.

If Yunho noticed the interested twinkle in your eyes, he didn't show it. Instead, he turned around, walking back to the front door to hang his jacket up next to yours. Afterwards, he wordlessly disappeared into the bathroom, likely to freshen up a bit after the awfully long day.

"Are you hungry?" You asked, watching him walk back into the room a few minutes later. "There's some leftovers from dinner if you want."

Yunho just hummed in disagreement, the pout from before returning to his lips. "'m not hungry."

"What can I do for you, then? What do you need?" You questioned further, scooting back to give him some room to sit down.

To your surprise (not really), he ignored the space you'd made for him, choosing to dive right into your arms instead. You huffed as he lay down on top of you, burying his face in your chest and wrapping his arms around you.

"You," he finally muttered, squeezing you just a bit tighter in his hold.

"Me? What do you mean?" You asked back, pretending like you couldn't already feel the slightest pressure against your thigh. Did he really rile himself up just thinking about his fantasy on the way home?

"Babe, please," he pleaded, an embarrassed whine to his voice, "you know what I mean."

Usually, you'd be satisfied with just a bit of teasing. A moment of playfulness before you'd get to the main event. But today? Today you wanted- no, needed, to truly savor the moment, both for your and Yunho's sake.

"I really don't, honey," you feigned ignorance, running your fingers through his hair with a mischievous smile on your face. "I'm afraid you're gonna have to tell me yourself."

And judging by the deep red visible on his cheeks even with his face hidden, you knew it was working for him as well.

"I just- I really need you right now," Yunho said, voice already wavering from the delicious anxiousness of being so small before you. "Y-you know, like, to be... inside you."

You chuckled at that, jostling your boyfriend's head a bit with the movement. "Ah, of course. It hasn't even been two days since you've last gotten off and you already wanna go again, huh?"

Yunho just meekly nodded, trying to bury his head further into you.

"I mean, I don't blame you, honey, but what's in it for me?"

Your question wasn't too direct just yet, still giving him some leeway to stop in case he felt uncomfortable or not ready.

But, much to your amusement, Yunho made no such attempt.

"Oh! W-well, I'll make you feel good too, obviously!" He promised, lifting his head up to look at you with hopeful eyes. "I always do."

You let out a loud laugh at that, making his face twist in confusion. "What?! You can't be serious right now."

"Wait, what do you mean?" Yunho asked in a shaky, uncertain voice, but the twitch against your thigh betrayed his real feelings.

"You seriously think fucking that small dick of yours is doing anything for me?" You ridiculed him, eyes wide in disbelief. "Why do you think I always ask you to eat me out after you're done? Even that tongue of yours feels bigger in me."

Truth be told, it wasn't you who usually asked for oral. Whether during, before, or after having "proper" sex, it was mainly Yunho who'd turn to you with hopeful eyes and an eager smile. But there's nothing wrong with a bit of fact-twisting for the sake of roleplay, right?

Your slight uncertainty was immediately solved with a choked moan from Yunho, along with a stuttered thrust against your leg. You could feel all of him through his pants now, dragging up and down your thigh with just enough pressure.

"P-please, babe," Yunho began again, gaze blurring into something more distant yet content. "I'll do anything to please you afterwards, but I'm so hard I don't think I can wait any longer."

"Wait," you said in fake awe, "you're hard right now? I can't even feel you against me! Are you sure you can actually stay inside with that?"

"Fuck," Yunho whimpered at your words, brows tightly knit together, "you're way too good at this."

You chuckled at his admission, breaking your mocking persona for a moment. "I'm glad you think so, hun." Lifting a hand to caress his cheek, you made him look into your eyes. "You're still okay with all of this, right?"

Yunho immediately nodded at your question, eager to reassure you. "Yes, please. This is better than anything I've ever imagined."

Feeling an almost embarrassing level of pride at the praise, you resumed your role with newfound excitement.

"You know what?" You spoke up again, challenging him with your unwavering stare. "I'll let you have your fun."

Yunho didn't need anything beyond that, diving into the crook of your neck the second you finished your sentence. You couldn't help the gasp leaving your lips at the sensation, Yunho's precision at finding your sweet spot catching you way too off-guard.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you," Yunho muttered lovingly, letting his hands roam free alongside your curves while he rutted against your thigh again.

His movements were halted, however, when a sharp sting shot up his scalp from where your fingers tugged at his hair, pulling him away from your neck.

"But," you continued, suppressing a mean smile, "you have to make me cum first, since you're so confident in your abilities."

You could see all the eagerness fall from Yunho's face and morph into a look of nervousness and uncertainty. Normally, Yunho would have no problem making you cum whichever way you wanted, but now, he knew it wouldn't be so easy. Your eyes screamed determination, excited to see him slip up and embarrass himself even further.

"I- I, uh- yeah! Sure, of course," Yunho finally replied, though the confident facade he tried to put on broke rather quickly.

You sighed, feigning complete disinterest as if you already knew what the outcome would be anyway. "Fine, go ahead then. Let's see how much magic you can conjure up with that tiny dick."

The two seconds of silence that followed after your sentence were broken by a chuckle from Yunho, making you join in as well.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I know that was supposed to be hot - and it was, but it was also pretty funny."

"Shut up," you retorted, annoyed, though you couldn't hide your own amusement. Fighting back the shy blush on your cheeks, you continued, "and get back to work. You have a lot to prove right now."

"Yes, ma'am," Yunho muttered, re-focusing on the task at hand. He crawled backwards on the couch, giving him just enough space to take off your sweatpants and underwear, ignoring the damp spot in the middle. Seems like he wasn't the only one enjoying this.

He then removed his own pants and boxers, making you scoff. "Are you seriously so horny you can't even take off my shirt as well? You're so pathetic."

Yunho whined at the delicious sting of your words, crawling back up to settle between your legs. Just as he'd told you, he was already rock hard, pent-up from daydreaming about this exact scenario the whole day. Today was going to be the day, he just knew it. And now that it was actually happening, not to mention how you seemed to like it as well? He was almost shaking with excitement.

"Don't even bother with prep," you said unenthusiastically, reaching over to the coffee table to grab your phone again. "There's no need to prepare for something that small."

Yunho's movements stuttered for a second at your words, unsure of how to proceed. You usually liked it when he'd take his time and warm you up to his size, but now you were telling him to just skip it and go right to the main event. Well, guess he's going to have to trust your judgment.

"It's not even that small," Yunho tried to argue, fumbling with his erection to line himself up properly, "just wait, I'll show you how good I can make you feel."

You looked up from the phone in your hand (you couldn't really focus on anything on there, but pretended to be distracted anyways in the name of your role-playing session), trying to seem as unbothered as possible. "Yeah, yeah, all that big talk just to-"

Your words got caught in your throat as he finally began pushing in. You knew it was going to be a bit of a stretch, but those expectations were exceeded anyways. Taking a deep breath, you tried to relax as much as possible. As the resistance from your muscles began to fade, so did Yunho begin to breach even deeper.

"You good?" Yunho tentatively asked, visibly affected himself.

Unable to form words at the moment, you just nodded as confidently as you could.

After a few more tense seconds, Yunho was finally fully sheathed inside of you. He stayed like that for a while, looking into your eyes for a sign to start moving.

"So? How does it feel?" He asked, a playful smile on his lips at the way you were biting your bottom lip with furrowed brows.

As always, Yunho just couldn't help but be a brat and keep challenging your authority at the most random of times.

But, of course, you were having none of that.

Fighting back a wicked smile, you feigned confusion instead.

"What do you mean?" You asked, trying to sound as genuine as possible. "I'm still waiting for you to put it in."

It was almost impossible not to burst out laughing at the flustered look on Yunho's face. His eyes widened, flitting between your seemingly innocent face and down where you were already connected. "But- but I-"

"But what?" You challenged again, that annoyed edge to your tone from before returning. "Too scared to go through with it now? Just admit I'm right and save yourself the humiliation, seriously."

Yunho shook his head, the blush on his face spreading down to his neck and chest. "No, that's not- I mean, I- I'm already-"

"Already what? Not hard anymore? Got so anxious that that poor excuse of a dick fell asleep again? Not that it makes much of a difference, really."

Yunho's bottom lip trembled as he squeezed his eyes, stomach churning as the humiliation seeped even further in. It felt so awful to the point it felt exhilarating. He wanted to believe you couldn't feel him incessantly throbbing within you, but he was smarter than that.

"That's not what I meant!" He cried out, voice wobbling from the tightness in his chest. "I'm just- It's already in, okay?!"

A deafening silence filled the room, making Yunho want to curl up on himself. All of your attention was on him right now, boring into him with an intense, unreadable gaze.

And then you began laughing.

"Oh my god," you wheezed incredulously, gasping for air. Your body shook with your breaths, unintentionally squeezing around Yunho as well.

It was confusing, feeling the mix of incredible arousal along with insane shame. Yunho could feel his stomach tighten to the point of almost hurting, and yet it felt so good.

"Are you crying?" You gasped, marveling at the tears in his eyes threatening to spill over at any second. "You were so overconfident about that tiny dick of yours and look where it got you now. Crying because you can't even please a woman right. You're incredible."

That was the final straw.

Sobs echoed around the room as Yunho finally broke, letting the tears flow freely as he gave in to the humiliation. His arms gave out under him as he fell into your embrace again, wetting the pillow under you as he hid his face into it. He trembled in your hold in almost complete silence, safe for the occasional sniffles and an almost inaudible "fuck" whimpered into the cushion.

"You okay?" You whispered, tangling a hand into his hair to pet it softly.

Yunho quickly nodded in your hold before shuffling his head down into the crook of your neck again. "I'm gonna cum, oh my god."

You smiled fondly at his words, using his obstructed vision to relax your stern expression for just a second. "Aw, is that it? You've barely even put it in - or at least you say you did - and you're already gonna cum? What happened to our deal, huh? Are you that desperate you can't even wait for me to get off first?"

Just as expected, your words seemed to rile him up even further. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," he said in a strained voice. His hips began rutting against yours with zero rhythm, focused on chasing the pleasure your body and words had brought him. "I'm so pathetic I can't help it, please!"

You rolled your eyes, but the clenching of your own muscles around him betrayed your true thoughts on the situation. "Ugh, fine. Not like I expected anything better anyways. Just clean up after yourself when you're done, and maybe I'll let you make me cum after."

Yunho grinned down at you, wet cheeks shining in the light. "Thank you, oh god, thank you!"

You gasped as his pace quickened, rocking you up and down on the couch under him. Yunho's face showed nothing but absolute bliss, eyebrows furrowing and mouth hanging open as he got lost in the feeling of you.

"Fuck- I love you, I love you so much," Yunho suddenly groaned out, head hanging low as he tried to keep up with himself, "you're the best thing that's ever happened to me, I swear."

You chuckled at the confession, trying to keep your breathing somewhat steady yourself. "Just because I told you your dick is small? That's not difficult criteria to meet, don't you- ah! Don't you think?"

Yunho just moaned in response, head too stuffy to form proper responses anymore. However, the increasing pleasure coursing through him felt so overwhelming to the point he had to at least say something, and so he resorted to that which he knew best.

"Love you, love you so much, 'so good to me, treat me so well all the time," he rambled on and on, hiding his face in the crook of your neck before lifting his head up to breathe properly, only to then drop back down again. "You feel so- fuck! So good, I love you! Please, can I come? Please, I need to-"

"Come, honey," you spoke in a hushed yet clear voice, slipping your hands underneath his shirt to press him closer to your chest. "Did so well today, took everything I gave you and then some."

Yunho let out another sob at your words, overwhelmed with both the warmth of your body and your words. Clutching your hips and waist tight enough to bruise, he pushed into you two, three times before finally stilling inside of you. His back tensed as the endorphins hit him all at once, even clouding his vision for a moment.

You held your lover close as he slowly came down from his high, holding onto you for dear life. Your hands rubbed soothing circles into his back.

Just when you were starting to think he'd fallen asleep, Yunho spoke up again.

"Well, that was insane."

You chuckled, making him raise his head up to look at you. "In a good way or in a bad way?"

Quirking an eyebrow, he nodded down to your half-naked bodies, still connected together in the middle. "What do you think?"

"Yeah, yeah, I get it," you conceded. "I was just scared of accidentally hurting your feelings in the process, so I needed to ask for my own peace of mind."

"You could never hurt me with anything you'd said today," Yunho reassured you, bringing one of his hands up to cup your cheek. "Besides," he grinned, "like you said, I have quite a lot of evidence to prove none of what you told me is true."

That earned him an outraged slap on his arm, making him giggle mischievously. Nevertheless, it left the both of you smiling stupidly anyways.

"...Anyways, I have a favor to repay, don't I?" He asked in a husky voice, supporting himself against the couch cushions as he rose back up.

"Ah, you don't really have to," you replied shyly, suddenly reminded of the compromising position you were stuck in in front of him. "I mostly just said that as part of the scene, we can just go clean up in the shower like we usually do."

It was already too late, though, as Yunho began to slowly pull out of you, dropping down on his stomach right after to make sure you didn't make a mess on the couch.

"No, no, you were right," he disagreed, flashing you a devious smile as he disappeared between your legs.

"You already did your part, now let me do mine."

taglist: @justconniez @domribo @another-random-fanfic-blog

Thank you for reading! And remember, feedback is always very appreciated! <3

[emmyrosee]

this is for the non curse bf!sukuna

when you first start going out he wouldn’t know what flowers to get you. he could ask you but- who tf asks their gf ‘hey what flowers do you like?’ he thinks that’s lame. so guy brings 5-6 diff flowers just for you.

can you imagine, him all tattooed and brooding buying you flowers in a pretty flower shop😭😭i’m crying :((((((

OKAY BUT IF HE DOES IT TO LIKE, ASK YOU TO BE HIS GF???

Like originally he was just going to take you out on a few dates, enjoy the company and yuuji and his Ma off his back, but that plan crumbled when he started to be the one to text you first. When he started to initiate dates. When he started to feel butterflies in his chest when you laughed.

Yuuji so graciously told him he had feelings and should cuff you before you get tired of him, and the idea swirls for a bit in Sukuna’s head before one night at four am, he storms into yuuji’s room and in a pure panic asks “how do I ask her out?”

Yuuji grumbles and throws a pillow at his brother, “flowers and candy, go back to bed.”

But Ryomen does anything but. Because there’s so many flowers and so many candies, how will he know which is your favorite? And as much as he’d love to ask you, it would ruin the surprise of being so excited at being his girlfriend that you’d have to say yes- a little manipulative, perhaps, but he’s not perfect despite what he says.

So he kinda goes… crazy.

He buys you all sorts of candy, everything from sour to chocolate, to even some cotton candy grapes and gummy bear watermelon and more candy flavored candy, all to put in a small bag that dangles from his thick wrist.

Next is the flower shop, and that’s even more stressful because how is he supposed to pick between roses and peonies and assorted and god knows what other breeds of flowers there are- one time, as a kid, he saw yuuji give a little boy a fistful of yellow dandelions, can’t he just do that?

According to the swipe of his credit card after picking out seven bouquets…. No. Apparently not.

He lugs everything out to his car with grunts of efforts, texting you telling you to be home because the smell of flowers is making him nauseous and the candy is probably melting in the warmth of the sun.

SENT please tell me you’re home?

Schnookums (god he needs to change that, why’d you ever put yourself as something so feral in his phone?) why, you coming over??

SENT no I’m making conversation

Tf

Of course that question means I’m coming over

Schnookums yayyyy okay 🥺💙

He scoffs before making a floor to your house, nerves making him speed a little too fast and almost run a few too many red lights, and he’s grateful that the cops he passed have mercy on him and let him get to your house without a ticket or handcuffs.

He gathers his bundle back in his arms and blindly makes his way up your driveway, using the sheer grace of the gods watching over him to not trip and crush everything under him. He sneezes god knows how many times, and once he’s finally at your door, he doesn’t know how long it takes him to knock successfully, but after 5 tries, he finally nails it.

And after a few short seconds, you open the door with a gasp of excitement. “What did you do!”

“I wasn’t- fuck!” The flowers start to slip as he tries to peer over them to look at you. You’re quick to make a move to help him catch them. “Fuck. God damn it. Ugh.” He clears his throat, “I wasn’t sure what flowers to get, so… I bought them all.”

“Whats in the bag?”

“An absolutely feral amount of sweets.”

You’re beaming at him, so excited between the gesture and seeing him that you immediately toss your arms around him, the crinkling of the bouquets being what snaps you back to life.

“Ah shit.”

“Sorry! Sorry!! I just… this is so sweet,” you say, smiling.

“Well, I uhh…. I wanted… you and I’ve been kinda… going out for a while….”

“Yeah?” You ask, and with the way your eyes widen and jaw slacks slightly, you know what he’s going to ask.

And he knows you’re going to make him do it.

“And I really… really have enjoyed it.” He takes a deep breath, “not sure why, but-“

“Shut up,” you snicker.

“But I kinda… want to do it. More. And… not let you do it with other people.”

“Okay,” you giggle.

“And I’m told the only way to do that is to make you my girlfr-“

“YES!” You scream, wrapping your arms around him again, and when he makes a noise of protest, you grab the flowers to put them on the ground, hugging him again tightly.

Tightly enough his organs hurt and his breath can’t get into his body, but this feels so right, so good and so comforting that he’d let you do it forever. He kisses your head and cradles it, letting the bag rest against your back.

“I can’t believe you went through all this trouble for me,” you murmur against him.

He chuckles, “don’t thank me too much yet. We still need to find vases for all of these because I’ll be damned if I let my kind gesture die within twelve hours.”

“I don’t even know if I own a vase.”

He stiffens, and you snicker in his grip.

“Well then I hope your don’t like your kitchen sink too much.”

[please-read-the-manga]

'Sasuke deserves to die in a ditch.' Actually, though?

Decided to make this its own post because truthfully I don't know the etiquette here, but someone posted something pretty laughably egregious in the 'Sasuke' tag (as far as character interpretations go) and I felt compelled to gather up some manga panels to try and figure out where they were coming from and if you could feasibly justify their take.

The initial assertion, from what I gather, is that Sasuke's supposed inaction towards Orochimaru's other prisoners/experiments is heinous and as a result has warped him into such an evil that even Itachi cannot/should not forgive him. I am summarizing, perhaps crudely, but the original post is not the most thought out concept lol. I did consider it, though... were we ever shown Sasuke participating or condoning Orochimaru's actions? Was Sasuke complicit and, if so, to what degree?

Now, I'll briefly caveat that I think it seems like the original post might have been more of a story request? Which, in that case, who am I really to judge what someone wants to write for their own fun/enjoyment? But taking it in good faith that that's all it is and the post wasn't actually bait (which I acknowledge I'm falling hook, line, and sinker for if it is lol), then that's still a pretty tall order for a story as it (imo) requires such a dramatic departure from the canon portrayals of multiple characters to make it work.

I mean, even the cognitive dissonance Itachi would have to employ in an act of ultimate hypocrisy to judge Sasuke's alleged inaction as any worse/less agreeable than his own active violence would be incredibly fascinating given he is the murderer of countless innocents, operated as a reliable agent in a terrorist organization for multiple years and faithfully did whatever it took to uphold the appearance of loyalty, and encouraged Sasuke to go to any length for enough power to defeat him/later be able to fend for himself post-assisted suicide.

But I'm getting ahead of myself. Let's just check out some panels and reflect on what Sasuke was doing while he was under Orochimaru's control and see what we can extrapolate from there.

1.) We can start out easy with Sasuke's alleged interest/participation in Orochimaru's experiments to which we are blatantly shown that he actually has complete and utter disgust for Orochimaru's methods.

He is revolted by what Orochimaru does for his experiments, even (in the panels above) likening Orochimaru's cruelty to that of Itachi's, someone who (at this point in the story) Sasuke views as the ultimate evil.

The rest will be hosted under the cut because adding panels (and I apparently hit the limit of that) drags out the length of these posts to an absurd degree.

2.) Kishimoto makes a point of showing us that Sasuke has deliberately chosen not to kill or even give in to Orochimaru's cruelty during their time together, something Orochimaru even mocks him for.

Sasuke's sole goal at this point in the story is exclusively to kill Itachi so he can achieve justice for his family and bloodline. He even continues to reiterate this point post-Orochimaru's death (but pre-Itachi death/reveal of Konoha's atrocious betrayal of the Uchiha) to Team Hebi.

3.) Sasuke outright states that he was only able to kill Orochimaru while he was weakened. He is also well aware that Orochimaru wishes to possess his body (ie. genetics) and, given that he is prepared to face Orochimaru at this exact, pivotal moment when he is most weakened/Sasuke is most guaranteed victory (ie. Sasuke is not taken off guard at all), I think you can make the argument that he was keenly preparing to attack/kill Orochimaru as soon as he was able. If he didn't do so earlier, then perhaps it stands to reason he didn't believe he was capable of succeeding at any other point.

4.) Sasuke certainly has some degree of freedom and maneuverability that other captives of Orochimaru do not, but he is definitely not an equal to Orochimaru and that power dynamic between them is reiterated frequently. While he is sometimes referred to with respect, he is also referred to as a pet/experiment. A gilded cage is still a cage. The power dynamic of Orochimaru as the master and Sasuke as his captive/future vessel/object of desire is notably and routinely emphasized.

*Note Suigetsu's use of 'we' and 'us'. To me, this implies that Sasuke is viewed by other captives as 'one of them' and not someone operating alongside Orochimaru like, say, Kabuto and Karin. Also, I'm out of images, but there's a panel I had to delete for space which has Orochimaru referring to Team Taka + Sasuke as his 'superior lab rats' again emphasizing Sasuke's shared status.

5.) Speaking of Suigetsu (who we know was experimented upon), he appears to be quite familiar with Sasuke when Sasuke comes to free him. While we unfortunately don't get to see it, its obvious that a relationship of some degree has been formed between the two. Their familiarity with one another highlights that this is not the first time Suigetsu and Sasuke are meeting and from this we can (perhaps) infer that he and Sasuke bonded at an earlier point and, due to the lack of antagonism from Suigetsu towards Sasuke compared to his immediate dislike of Karin who he does state experimented on him, that Sasuke did not participate in his torture.

Keep in mind that, at this stage in the story, this is a hardened Sasuke who has fully embraced his role as the sole arbiter of justice that can do right by his family, but it's still Sasuke. This is still the same Sasuke who fed Naruto, violating Kakashi's rules, and risked never becoming a ninja. This is the same Sasuke who sacrificed his life for Naruto, who called Naruto and Sakura his precious people he wanted to protect, etc. This is the same Sasuke who a few chapters later goes out of his way to show great respect to the ninja cats and Nekobaa, thanking her for everything! Even if he may have been hardened, I'd argue we are almost always encouraged (as readers) to remember that Sasuke is fundamentally a good, kind child (like Naruto) that was horrifically tortured and manipulated by bad actors and the corrupt ninja system into embracing those more violent tendencies out of his deep love for others and a need for survival. Naruto, importantly, never lets this image of Sasuke fall from memory (even calling Sasuke out when Sasuke tries to fancy himself a villain) and, in my opinion, the reader would do well to remember who Sasuke really is as well.

And, in this vein, who is to say he never fed Suigetsu when Kabuto wasn't looking, igniting their bond? That he and Suigetsu didn't talk about their brothers? It's pure conjecture, but thoughts to consider that aren't the most braindead 'Sasuke is pure evil' nonsense you see out there lol.

*Also, 'I knew you'd show up' can imply so much. Did Suigetsu know of Sasuke's plans to overtake Orochimaru? Why was he so sure Sasuke would come rescue him? Much to consider there.

6.) Outside of Suigetsu, let's take a moment to look at how other prisoners/captives view Sasuke. We are directly shown that they, in some form or another, view him as one of them. Again, I interpret this to have emerged from an understood kinship that informs Sasuke's status as 'Orochimaru's next vessel' as not inherently divorced from the idea of him being just as much a captive/victim as them.

Sure, he is afforded some privileges as we've already mentioned (being at Orochimaru's side and not in a cell, for example) but this does not negate the fact Orochimaru always intended to use him, just as he used every other prisoner/captive under his watch. Also, as far as these privileges go, I find it interesting that it's also implied Sasuke was constantly (or at least a majority of the time) accompanied/monitored by Orochimaru and Kabuto given that his mere presence without Orochimaru/Kabuto breathing down his neck is notable enough that multiple people comment on it.

*Note the use of 'chaperone' here, it's an interesting word choice.

7.) Now, let's discuss the curse mark which is the sole reason why Sasuke is with Orochimaru to begin with.

Orochimaru deliberately coveted, targeted, and groomed Sasuke as far back as the Chunin Exam arc so that he could harvest his genetics. He forcibly placed a curse mark (again, read: CURSE, this was not some fun little power-up, it retains extremely negative drawbacks) on the body of a 12-year-old genin who was taking a state-sponsored meat grinder-style exam and found himself up against one of the Legendary Sannin, someone he couldn't possibly hope to defeat.

And we know that the curse mark Sasuke never asked for includes the following:

It debilitates him/constantly erodes his body.

It could have immediately killed him (multiple characters familiar with the curse marks are shocked he survived and continues to survive).

It amplifies and inflames his hatred (we see Orochimaru taunting him and inflaming his survivor's guilt while he is knocked out, ie. utilizing his horrific trauma against him).

And, ultimately, it is implied it would have eventually always required Sasuke to seek Orochimaru out to survive it.

Additionally Orochimaru is frequently shown targeting vulnerable children just like Sasuke and manipulating them for his own gain. This is standard practice for him and as far as extremely vulnerable children go, there are hardly any better examples than Sasuke. There was always an inherent power imbalance shown in the relationships between him and the children he is manipulating. He handles them in a way that is expressly individualized to exert ultimate control over the relationship and exploit their vulnerabilities/trauma tenfold.

8.) And, on top of the curse mark, Sasuke must contend with Itachi's conditioning of his psyche. At the ripe age of seven, Sasuke was actively encouraged by Itachi to give in to killing to try and strengthen his sharingan (ie. the infamous 'kill your best friend' directive). Importantly, Sasuke resisted this! Even though he had no reason not to follow the bloody path his brother laid for him, he refused to give into such cruelty. This is on top of the intense psychological torture and enormous weight that Sasuke had to bear in his quest for justice. Knowing you are the only survivor and no one else cares half as much as you do about avenging your annihilated family and culture is no small pressure to bear. To then actively choose to do it your way and stay true to yourself/values, is also commendable.

9.) I saved this one for later on as it's pretty well known among fans already and so directly refutes OP's concept of Sasuke holding no care for the other captives around him. But Sasuke goes on to free Orochimaru's prisoners as soon as he can. He straight up does not leave them hanging lol.

Side note: I love these panels, I wish a lot more had been done with them. It was around this time in the manga I really wish it had been renamed Sasuke, because everything going on here was x10 more interesting than anything happening with the Konoha crowd lol.

10.) Finally, as far as Sasuke goes, we have to acknowledge that Sasuke's ultimate goals always revolve around avenging the grave injustices done against those he loves/loved. Sasuke continually represents selfless love, he will sacrifice everything so his loved ones (his mother, father, brother, and clan) who have had all these wrongs done against them are given proper rest and justice.

He is deeply traumatized, he doesn't always fully know the entire story (as it's in the best interest of the bad actors around him -Itachi, Orochimaru, Obito- for him not to know everything/the entire truth), and he often struggles to express his thoughts/feelings in an adequate way that will afford him the help/answers he needs from others. So, Sasuke is not without his flaws/difficulties. But you'd have to be purposefully misinterpreting the text/his characterization to not see the good in him that Naruto, the main character, is loudly, constantly, directly shouting about at every chance he gets.

And let's end on the quick, again, laughable idea Itachi would ever 'put down' Sasuke. We have a couple of Itachi's to consider:

We have Itachi 0.0, a traumatized child who had far too much responsibility foisted upon him and who took Danzo's shit genocide deal that guaranteed ONLY Sasuke would be spared. At this stage (and again, we're talking a young, traumatized child soldier) Itachi would rather have his name besmirched for eternity and be the mass murderer to his own flesh and blood than ever put his baby brother in danger. The dilemma he was presented should also be coupled with the fact that Danzo is an incredibly manipulative, evil genocider who simply couldn't wait to mutilate some bodies/rob some graves for his own power/ambition while ruining countless lives (Itachi's included, and especially Sasuke's) as he knowingly shoved Itachi into a corner.

We have Itachi 1.0 that hoped traumatizing his brother and encouraging him to become as strong as possible (by any means possible) and avenge the clan/kill him so he could become this 'ultimate hero' to the village would lead his baby brother to theoretically (lifelong trauma notwithstanding) living a long, safe, productive life after he was gone.

We have Itachi 2.0 that wondered if Naruto might be able to help his (understandably) spiraling brother and was heartened when Naruto insisted he would never kill Sasuke and would always find another way - ie. reiterating the unconditional love Itachi has and always had for his baby brother. This, interestingly, resulted in Naruto being given Shisui's eye that would have forcibly brainwashed Sasuke into serving the state that sanctioned their clan's genocide, but let's ignore the horrible implications of that for a minute...........

And finally we have Itachi 3.0 who admits he was wrong to go about the early plans for Sasuke's life in the way that he did. He states, ultimately, he will love Sasuke no matter what. It's unconditional. He stops trying to forcibly alter his brother's lifepath and he states outright and blatantly that he will always love Sasuke, nothing will change that. His actions have always been influenced by his interpretation of love for Sasuke and that cannot be divorced (in good faith) from his character.

I'm being a bit facetious in some of these summarized points, but generally Itachi's stance on Sasuke's well-being never changes, he always loves Sasuke, only the way in which he offers guidance/expresses his love/thinks about what Sasuke's well-being looks like evolves throughout the story.

*Apologies, I have no idea why the font is so atrocious on these panels lol, but it says "And not matter what you do from here on out, know this... I will love you always."

Idk man, whoever is writing this story OP is asking for, is going to have a crazy uphill battle trying to convince readers that Itachi would ever give up on his brother (that he... directly encouraged this type of behavior in...) when Itachi exists to support and love his brother, when Itachi has always done everything for Sasuke. The debate about whether those actions were in any way good or healthy is wholly separate, but the text outright emphasizes that Sasuke has Itachi's entire, unconditional support and love no matter what. I know some people are allergic to the concept of unconditional love for some reason, but this is a crucial, critical, overwhelmingly highlighted point in the manga and these two specific characters' respective arcs that are known and cherished by many, many people lol, so, I don't know how you renege on that...

But I'd love to see a writer try, I guess. Why not? If you can keep both Sasuke and Itachi in-character and manga accurate, I'd be very interested in seeing a Itachi that not only abandons his beloved brother he has done everything for but also tries to kill him. I definitely wouldn't know how to go about making that convincing given all the direct evidence to the contrary presented in the manga.

Now, the stuff we don't know about Suigetsu and Sasuke's time together or spin-offs that maybe explore a Sasuke that continues on his trajectory to support and lead the people the shinobi world has abandoned? Like the kekkei genkai users (much like himself) who were abused by many in the shinobi world and further victimized by Orochimaru's vile ambitions? I'd, personally, be really interested in reading a faithful exploration of that. There is a lot to explore with Sasuke's time with Orochimaru, but I'd recommend reviewing the actual manga if you're after a realistic/authentic portrayal of these characters in your work.

[anon-188]

mini series: wicked games 🥀 — pt. 3

pairing: AJ x f!reader 

series summary: it was supposed to be simple. no feelings. no fallout. but when tempers flare and lines blur, simple turns dangerous fast. because AJ plays just as dirty outside the bedroom as he does in it—and you? you’re not afraid to match him move for move.

warnings: explicit content (18+), strong language, alcohol use, strip poker, toxic dynamics, power plays, suggestive themes, mean!AJ, jealousy, emotional tension.

a/n: no bc why am i liking toxic AJ more and more??? 😭 anyway, hope you guys enjoy this one!! ♡

⟢ wicked games 🥀: part 1 | part 2 | part 4 | epilogue

The first round started fast, all noise and chaos.

Shit talking flew across the room as the guys placed their bets without hesitation. Jesse slapped a hundred-dollar bill on the table, swearing up and down that John's hand didn't stand a chance. The others jumped in with wild confidence, voices overlapping.

But when the cards hit the table, it was your hand that won.

Silence followed. Then came the noise again, but this time with disbelief. They called it bullshit.

You didn’t say anything, just smiled and shrugged. 

AJ’s hand was the worst, but he didn’t flinch. Didn’t speak. He just sat back, eyes locked on you, and moved his hands to his belt. 

You watched as he pulled it free, folded it once, then set it beside his chair. He grabbed his cigar from the ashtray where it rested, took another slow drag, and kept his eyes on you. 

It was a challenge.

One that had nothing to do with the game and everything to do with how far you were willing to push each other tonight. 

The following rounds moved fast, layered in more drinks and even fewer clothes. By the fourth round, you still had your dress and heels on—every safe option already gone. The rest of the group was scattered in varying states of undress: John down to just his pants and socks, Jesse practically naked, Gordon as composed as ever in his full ensemble, and the girl John brought, in nothing but her bra and miniskirt.

AJ sat across from you, still shirtless, inked skin on full display in the low light. You tried not to look, but that only made it worse. His pants and shoes were still on, but the cigar was gone now, and the grin he wore in its place was worse—smug, unbothered, infuriating. 

Gordon shuffled, dealt again. And of course, AJ won.

You cursed under your breath then leaned forward to unbuckle the straps of your heels. AJ’s eyes followed every movement, no attempt to be subtle. 

It was his turn to deal. He leaned forward, forearms resting on his knees as he gathered the deck. His fingers moved easily, shuffling once, twice, before he began dealing out the cards. The room had gotten louder again. Laughter and crude jokes bounced off the walls. But underneath it all, you could feel AJ’s presence like always. It pressed against your skin, heavy and impossible to ignore.

Then—

“What’s wrong? Not having fun?” AJ asked, voice flat, low, laced with a hint of arrogance that made your stomach tighten.

He didn’t say your name. Didn’t have to.

You knew he was talking to you. The edge in his voice made it clear. It was a jab wrapped in silk, meant to land right beneath the surface.

You gave a breathy, humorless laugh. “No,” you said, pausing long enough to let the silence stretch.

“I’m just trying to figure out who I should fuck next, remember? Gotta keep up appearances.” You slipped off your heels, setting them aside.

His hands faltered for half a second, the smooth rhythm of dealing disrupted. You saw it—the smallest hitch, but it was there. Then he recovered, kept going like nothing had touched him. Like your words hadn’t hit exactly where you wanted them to.

But just before he dealt you your final card, he paused. Held it in his hand. Looked right at you.

“One fifty,” he said.

You stilled.

He was actually fucking betting you.

“Insulting me wasn’t enough? Now you want my money too?” The words came out dry, like the taste in your mouth hadn’t left since the rooftop.

“It’s just a game.” His voice dipped slightly, and that smirk didn’t budge.

“Everything is to you.”

AJ leaned forward again. “You in or not?”

You pressed your tongue to your cheek, jaw tight as your glare sharpened.

“Yeah. Whatever,” you muttered, the heat in your chest rising.

AJ finally slid the card across the table to you, signaling the start of the next round.

You glanced down at your cards and felt your pulse kick. It was a good hand. A strong one. The kind that usually won. Maybe tonight was finally swinging back in your favor.

The others revealed their hands one by one.

Jesse threw his cards down first. “Pair of fives,” he said, already reaching for his drink like he didn’t care either way.

John was next. “Two pair. Nines,” he grinned.

Gordon raised a brow, laid his down with ease. “Kings.”

The girl on John’s side giggled, barely looking at her cards. “I’ve got twos. Don’t judge me,” she said, shrugging like she wasn’t the least bit invested.

You let the tension ride just a second longer, then fanned your hand out on the table, your voice light but confident. “Straight.”

A few impressed whistles sounded off. John immediately started talking shit, accusing you of cheating like he always did when he lost. You let the sound of it all soak in. This round was yours. It had to be.

Until AJ laid his hand down.

Silent. Slow.

The cards hit the table one by one. All the same suit.

“Flush.”

Your smile dropped.

The room didn’t fall quiet, not exactly, but it faded. Because even the others knew—your hand was solid, better than most. But it wasn’t the best.

AJ’s was.

And worse? Fucking house rules.

Normally, the lowest hand strips. But if the whole table’s playing low and two people come out swinging? The second-best hand takes the hit.

Which meant, even though you beat everyone else at the table, you lost. To him.

AJ’s eyes met yours across the table.

“Tough,” he said.

His voice was soaked in mock sympathy, and you swore it vibrated straight down your spine.

Your eyes narrowed. That stupid look on his face ignited the flames inside you all over again. You could’ve called him a fucking asshole right then and there. The words were at the edge of your tongue. But you bit them back.

No.

This was his game. And the only way to beat him was to play it better. When AJ didn’t like the outcome, he didn’t fold—he changed the rules. That’s how he always got what he wanted.

So you took a page out of his book.

The room was spiraling toward its inevitable end, especially with John practically on top of the girl he brought. Still, you owed the table a piece of clothing. 

You could’ve taken off your bra. Slipped it out of the dress, smooth and simple. No fuss.

But that wouldn’t sting. Wouldn’t win.

Your eyes stayed locked on AJ’s as you reached behind you, fingers brushing over the zipper at the back of your dress. You felt the faintest tug at the fabric, the pressure of the moment mounting, and you didn’t stop there.

You smiled. Soft. Then, you started to fumble—intentionally. Your fingers danced at the zipper like you couldn’t quite get it, like maybe you needed help.

You tilted your head, still smiling. “Hey, John,” you called sweetly, your voice cutting through the room.

He paused, pulling his mouth from the girl’s skin as he glanced over his shoulder. “Yeah?” 

“I just can’t get this,” you said, shifting your body toward him, exposing your back. “Can you—do you mind?”

You’d seen that flicker in AJ’s eyes the second your hands moved. He’d watched you get out of tighter dresses in record time. He knew damn well you didn’t need help. Which was the point.

You weren’t playing fair.

You were playing him.

John didn’t think twice about it. He laughed under his breath as he reached for the zipper. His fingers tugged it down, the fabric parting slow over your back as it slipped open. After he was done, his focus returned to the half-naked woman beside him without missing a beat.

But you didn’t care about John. You cared about the eyes across the table.

You looked at AJ.

He sat still, a little too still, leaning back in his chair. His jaw was locked so tight you could see the muscle twitch.

He was pissed. Good. 

You stood. Slid the straps of your dress off your shoulders and let the fabric fall. It hit the floor in a quiet pile at your feet.

AJ’s eyes held yours for one long second.

But then they moved.

They dragged. Down your neck. Across your chest then lower like he wanted to memorize everything and rip it apart in the same breath. And then his gaze stopped exactly where you expected it to—on your black lace thong with a tiny satin bow at the front. The ones he once said looked too damn good on you to leave on for more than thirty seconds.

His eyes snapped back up as he met yours again.

That was it. That was the moment.

You had him.

You knew it.  And, so did he.

You took your seat again as the next round started, the girl dealing this time. It moved fast. Gordon won—again. Jesse had the worst hand, but no one cared. The game was over. 

John and the girl barely bothered pulling their clothes back on before she started tugging him toward the stairs, lips brushing against his ear as they stumbled out.

Everyone else started to clear out, the buzz fading into loose conversation and scattered laughter. You pulled your dress back on, fingers clumsy with the zipper as the shots finally started to hit. But the haze in your head wasn’t just from the tequila.

It was him.

AJ.

You listened as the guys threw a few jokes his way—even expected some sort of smartass comeback from AJ, but he barely acknowledged them. Just reached into his pocket, pulled out his wallet, and tossed down the cash he owed them. Then he grabbed his things—belt, watch, shirt—and walked off without putting a single piece back on. He didn’t say a word as he headed straight up to the rooftop.

For a second, you thought about following. But you stopped yourself.

You, AJ, and that rooftop were starting to have a bad track record. And truthfully, this wasn’t on you. He wanted to play. You just played better.

So you let him go.

You turned back to the group, let the laughter pull you in. Let the burn of tequila mask whatever else was crawling under your skin.

As the night went on, you and John ended up downstairs in a booth. You both were decently drunk by now, drinks half-finished and conversation sloppier than it had been upstairs.

At some point, John started talking about the girl from earlier. Unfortunately, he gave too many details—explaining how they fucked in his car after the game. He spoke casually, like it was just another story, and to him, it was. In his eyes, you were one of the guys. Nothing off-limits.

You changed the subject eventually, dragging him for how he played earlier in strip poker. How you should’ve bet against him and made extra cash.

He told you to fuck off, laughing through it, then pointed out that Jesse lost the most money thinking with his dick, trying to impress the girl John brought upstairs.

“And what were you doing?” you asked, teasing him again.

He just laughed, smug as ever.

You shook your head with a smile as you stood.

The bottle between you was nearly empty, so you offered to grab another. You walked to the bar, reached for the whiskey, and as you turned back toward the booth, you caught movement near the stairs.

AJ was coming down the stairs from the lounge, dressed again and laughing with Gordon. 

You hadn’t seen him since the game ended, since he stormed off—and you didn’t need to guess why. You knew it was intentional.

You rolled your eyes. Ignored it. Ignored him.

And kept walking.

As you sat in the booth, you remembered the bets John made earlier and asked how much he owed Gordon.

“Four hundred and a pack of cigars. Cuban,” John said, leaning back against the seat with a sigh.

“Yeah, that’s on you.” You laughed. “You know he wins every time.”

“Every fucking time,” he muttered, raising his glass and finishing what was left.

“Hey, if it makes you feel any better, I owe AJ one-fifty.” You smirked, teasing.

John laughed again, this time quieter.

“No you don’t.”

“I lost, John. Or are you too drunk to remember that?” you said, laughing a little before taking another drink.

“He’s not going to make you pay him,” John mumbled, voice loose and slurred as his head tipped back against the booth.

You paused, glass halfway to your lips.

AJ wasn’t casual about money. Everyone knew that. If he weren’t in the middle of ignoring you, he probably would’ve been on your ass the second the game ended.

You brushed it off.

John was drunk. This was just him talking.

“Shut up,” you muttered with a grin, bumping your foot against his under the table.

He shook his head and poured himself another drink—one he definitely didn’t need.

Soon the night was winding down, Lili already on last call. Your head swam with more than just the alcohol. John’s comment lingered, circling in the back of your mind. It didn’t mean anything. Couldn’t.

Still, when you caught sight of AJ heading out front, something in you stirred. You were tempted to put it to the test.

Just then, another girl approached the booth, eyes locked on John. She didn’t hesitate, sliding in beside him like she’d been waiting all night. That was your cue. Or maybe just your out.

You slipped out of the booth without a word, crossed behind the bar to grab your purse, then made your way to the door. A moment later, you stepped out front, the door swinging shut behind you as your heels clicked against the pavement. 

The air was cooler now, the night quieter—but not by much. Just ahead, AJ stood leaning against his car, head tilted slightly as he lit a cigarette.

He took a slow inhale, then blew the smoke up into the air, eyes flicking to you once before shifting away.

You walked over with every intention to keep things neutral. But AJ already decided how this would go.

“What now? You come out here to finish your show from earlier?” he said, his voice rough—but more than anything, drunk.

You didn’t answer. Just steadied yourself and let the comment roll off. 

Then, you reached into your purse. “You said one-fifty, right?” Your voice stayed even, casual, like it wasn’t a test. But it was.

You pulled out the cash, held it out between you. “Here.”

AJ took another drag, slower this time, before flicking the ash onto the pavement beside him.

“Keep it,” he said, voice flat, smoke slipping from his mouth.

He hadn’t even looked at you or the money. Which meant—John was right.

Your brows pulled slightly, not enough for him to see, but enough for you to feel it sink in.

Still, you tried again. Quieter this time.

“I lost.” You held it out. “Take it.”

“I said keep it,” he snapped, sharper this time. He took a hit, then—

“Besides, I don’t want your guilt money.”

For fucks sake. Your jaw tightened, irritation building up. “It’s not guilt money. I lost your stupid bet—”

He let out a short, bitter chuckle, cigarette still clinging to the corner of his mouth. “Now you want to play fair?” His head tilted slightly, tone condescending.

He exhaled smoke, pulling the cigarette free. 

“You want to even the score?” he said, stepping in—close enough to shadow over you. His voice dropped, every word deliberate.

“Don’t waste my time with cash. Go fuck John. Make it count.”

The words landed hard. But AJ didn’t wait for a reaction this time. He didn’t even look at you again. Just pushed past you, flicking his cigarette to the ground, and disappearing back into the bar.

Heat rose in your chest, your head still cloudy from the alcohol. But even through the haze, you were livid. It wasn’t just the insult—it was how far he was willing to go to avoid being honest with you. To push instead of admit anything real.

You turned away, arms crossed as you started walking home, trying to shake it off. 

Then your eyes caught on John’s car. 

You paused.

An idea formed—fast.

You were angry, yeah. But more than that, you were done letting AJ pretend none of this mattered. He was still playing the game. 

And if he wasn’t done, neither were you.

If AJ wanted to punish you for something that never happened—fine. Maybe it was time he had a real reason to spiral.

You changed course before you could second-guess it. 

When you reached John’s car, you pulled the handle on his driver’s side door. Unlocked. Of course. He never locked it.

The parking lot was mostly empty now, save for a few scattered cars and the faint noise of music still echoing from inside the bar. The crew hadn’t left yet, which meant you were alone out here.

You stepped closer to the car and with a quick glance over your shoulder, you hooked your fingers beneath your dress and slid your underwear down your thighs. The lace slipped off easily. You balled the fabric in your hand as you leaned in, and dropped the lace onto the floorboard of the backseat. Not too obvious, but enough.

Then you shut the door. Calm. Quiet. Like you hadn’t just started a war. 

AJ and John always ended up talking out here at some point. It was routine. You knew AJ would see them—he couldn’t miss them even if he tried. He was too sharp, too observant.

John likely wouldn’t notice. And if he did, he’d probably assume they belonged to one of the many girls who had passed through that car, wouldn’t even question it.

But AJ? 

One look, and he’d know exactly who they belonged to.

It was petty. You knew that. Bold and impulsive, tiptoeing that fine line between reckless and too much. But the knot curled in your stomach, the one that churned not with regret but with anticipation—yeah, that told you it would be worth it.

Every damn second.

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[hevvxx2]

Title: Loud Thoughts, Hot coffee- Part 3: "He’s Going to Spontaneously Combust"

Characters: Joaquin Torres x reader

(Sam and Bucky mentioned)

Warnings: Dirty thoughts, fluff

Blue words: Inner Thoughts

Pink Words: Translation

Summary: After a mission, the team gathers for a casual dinner — but Joaquin is not prepared for how stunning she looks in a that dress. As she sits across from him, calm and composed, Joaquin silently spirals into chaos, trying (and failing) to act normal. Meanwhile, Sam and Bucky watch in smug amusement, fully aware of his meltdown. She knows exactly what she’s doing — and by the end of the night, it’s clear: Joaquin might survive missions, but he won’t survive her.

A couple days later....

It was supposed to be a lowkey dinner. A little post-mission debrief, a little team bonding. Nothing fancy.

Which is why Joaquin showed up to the restaurant in jeans, a dark button-down, and his usual relaxed smile.

That smile died immediately when she walked in.

Wearing a burgundy dress.

A burgundy dress that clung to her in all the right places, hugged her waist like it was built for her, and moved like she was in slow motion.

She didn’t mean to cause chaos. She just liked the color.

Joaquin’s brain, however, did not survive.

"Okay. Okay. Play it cool. It’s just a dress. Just fabric. Fabric and legs and arms and oh my GOD her collarbone should be illegal."

She took a seat across from him, completely calm.

Bucky and Sam gave her a subtle once-over. Sam raised his brows and nodded like a proud uncle. Bucky gave her a look that very clearly said, You knew what you were doing.

She smirked.

Joaquin, meanwhile, was already sweating.

"Don’t look at her shoulders. Why does she have shoulders like that? That’s not even fair. Are you blushing? You’re definitely blushing. Abort. Think about something else. Bread. Taxes. Baseball."

She reached for the menu with a giggle. "You okay, Torres? You look a little red."

He choked on his water. "Me? No! I mean — yes! I’m fine. Great. Just warm in here."

"That laugh. That LAUGH. She doesn’t even know Que jodidamente sexy ella es. God, if she ever found out—wait. Does she know? Is she looking at me weird? No. No, you’re paranoid. Stop thinking. Stop. Thinking. RIGHT NOW."

Translation: Que jodidamente sexy ella es (how fucking sexy she is)

Sam was chatting about something — something to do with drone flight data — but she wasn’t listening.

She was enduring.

Because Joaquin’s thoughts were spiraling like a drunk puppy on roller skates.

"Her dress matches her lips.. I can’t stop thinking about her lips.. ¿Cómo se sentirían? ¿Suave? ¿Recordete...? There should be rules about looking that good and sitting across from someone who hasn’t emotionally recovered from seeing you in tactical gear this morning."

Translation: ¿Cómo se sentirían? ¿Suave? ¿Recordete...? (How would they feel? Soft? Plump…?)

"Did she just lick her spoon? Okay. That’s it. I’m leaving my body. I’m becoming vapor. Tell my family I died honorably."

She took a slow sip of her drink to cover her very real, very visible laugh.

Bucky leaned over toward her. "Everything good?" he asked, a little too smug.

"Oh yeah." she said sweetly. "Dinner’s delicious."

Joaquin was still trying to recover from her saying his name earlier. Or maybe from existing near her.

"I am a soldier. A respectable man. I am not thinking about how that dress would look on my floor. STOP."

She clenched her fork.

"Joaquin…" she said casually. "You sure you’re okay? You’ve been staring at the ceiling for five straight minutes."

"I was just—uh—checking the ventilation system."

Sam gave him a long look. "Right."

"She has to know. She’s onto me. Abort mission. Fake a stomachache. Throw yourself through a window. Something. Por Dios Joaquin.. get yourself together"

Translation: Por Dios (For gods sake)

Bucky reached for another roll, very calmly whispering under his breath. "He’s going to combust. I give him ten minutes."

She didn’t reply. She was too busy trying not to laugh into her wine.

Joaquin excused himself halfway through dessert. Something about needing "air."

"Cool air. Cold air. Arctic-level air. That’s what I need. I’m dying. I’ve made eye contact with an angel in burgundy and I’ve died."

She looked at Bucky and Sam.

"I swear.." she muttered. "if you two don’t tell him soon, I’m going to start replying out loud to his thoughts and really break him."

Sam grinned. "Let him suffer."

Bucky shrugged. "He’s suffering beautifully."

She rolled her eyes.

Joaquin returned, a little calmer. Or so he thought.

Until she leaned toward him just slightly and said with the softest smirk:

"You were right, by the way. Burgundy is my color."

He froze.

"…I’m dead. That’s it. I’m gone. Bury me in this booth."

And she just sipped her drink, smiling to herself.

He still didn’t know.

But he was getting closer.

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[untilwefind]

Off Limits

Prompt credits @sleepy-hyperfixations: Ok but imagine non hockey player mack and will and aiden actually being on the same team in college and aiden taking will home with him during the summer and will is immediately fascinated by his little brother who he knows is off limits. Like will always finding a way to invite mack to every party they go to while aiden is just like "why is he here?? wait why do YOU want him here??", will sneaking out late at night to mack's room. Aiden and rick holding up signs "dont touch, off limits" and will like "this sign cannot stop me bc i cant read". Like the forbidden love of it all, will having mixed feelings bc he knows that if he fucks it up with mack his relationship with his brother is also over but at the same time how could he not?? Fall in love with mack?? Especially when mack pretends he cares about exercise now and be running drills with will and aiden just so he can see will shirtless and sweaty

It starts, as most catastrophes do, with a family barbecue.

Aiden’s backyard is all sun glare and cheap lawn chairs, the smoke of half-burnt burgers spiraling into the Vancouver sky. Will’s got a beer in hand and a paper plate full of carbs he doesn’t plan to justify to his trainer. There’s music playing from someone’s phone. There are kids screaming and aunts laughing. There’s Macklin.

He’s not supposed to notice.

That’s what Will tells himself. He’s not supposed to notice the way Mack’s grown since last summer, or the way he lingers near the edge of the patio, flipping a tennis ball between his hands like he’s dying for a distraction. He’s not supposed to notice the curve of his shoulders or the way he lights up when RJ tugs at his sleeve and says something about Pokémon. He’s not supposed to notice anything.

But he does.

“Don’t,” Aiden says under his breath as they stand shoulder-to-shoulder at the grill, watching Mack laugh at something RJ says.

Will pretends not to know what he means. He just smiles and takes a slow sip of his drink. “Don’t what?”

Aiden looks at him. Hard. “He’s eighteen.”

“I’m twenty. Not exactly robbing the cradle.”

“He’s my brother.”

Will shrugs. “Yeah, I gathered as much.”

Aiden gives him a look that could flatten a city block. “Off. Limits.”

Will lifts his hands in mock surrender. “Scout’s honour.”

But he was never a scout.

---

The problem isn’t that Will finds Macklin interesting. The problem is that Macklin finds him interesting back.

Will doesn’t bring him up again. Doesn’t push. He just… includes. Like any polite guest staying with the Celebrini family for the summer would.

There’s a bonfire on the beach that weekend, and Will tosses a casual “Hey, is Mack coming?” into the group chat, like it’s nothing. There’s a pickup game at the rec center, and Will forgets to mention it’s only supposed the other hockey guys in town. There’s a movie night in the basement, and somehow, some way, Mack always ends up next to Will.

“You gathering ideas for dates now?” Aiden asks one afternoon, catching Will red-handed, scrolling through Mack’s Instagram story like it’s a damn art exhibit.

Will tosses his phone on the couch. “Chill, Mom.”

“I am chill,” Aiden says tightly. “You’re the one who’s acting like he’s the hottest thing in the Pacific Time Zone.”

Will doesn’t say, he is. But he wants to.

---

One night, Will wakes up at 2 a.m., the heat thick and clinging, his sheets twisted around his legs. He’s halfway to the kitchen for water when he passes Mack’s door, barely cracked open, a sliver of light stretching across the hallway.

He pauses. Breathes.

The sign Aiden made (DO NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT) is taped to the door. Mack had laughed when their dad held it up at dinner. Rick Celebrini had handed Will a matching mug that read “Look But Don’t Touch.”

Will had smiled and said, “I can’t read.”

Now, he knocks once, soft, and opens the door before Mack can answer.

Mack’s sitting cross-legged on his bed, laptop open, earbuds in. He pulls one out when he sees Will and blinks like he’s unsure if he’s dreaming.

“Can’t sleep?” Mack asks.

Will shakes his head. “Too hot.”

Mack nods. He doesn’t move aside, doesn’t offer the bed, but Will sits anyway, shoulder brushing Mack’s.

They don’t talk for a minute. Just breathe.

“You know,” Mack says, not quite looking at him, “You don’t have to sneak around.”

Will huffs a laugh. “Tell that to your brother.”

“I’m not scared of Aiden,” Mack says.

Will is. A little. But not enough to stop. “You should be.”

Mack looks at him. “Are you?”

Will swallows. “I should be.”

There’s a pause. A held breath. Mack leans in.

Will meets him halfway.

---

The morning after, Will expects to wake up in a cold panic. He expects regret or at the very least, guilt.

Instead, he wakes up to Mack passed out on his chest, an arm slung across his ribs, and a sleepy smile tugging at his mouth.

He’s fucked.

---

They train together like it’s nothing.

Aiden says they’re doing agility drills and Mack shows up in sneakers and a tank top, stretching on the field like he’s been doing this for years. He keeps stealing glances at Will. Smirking. Will, of course, plays it cool, but nearly eats shit on a ladder drill after Mack tosses him a wink.

Aiden notices.

“You don't even play hockey anymore,” he snaps at Mack during cooldown. “Why are you here?”

Mack shrugs, grabbing water. “Just trying to stay in shape.”

Will, wiping sweat from his jaw, says, “You’re in great shape.”

Aiden glares. “Will.”

Will raises his hands again. “Still can’t read.”

---

The summer ends, as most heartbreaks do, with a choice.

Stay close and risk the fallout.

Or leave and live with the ache.

Will doesn’t make the decision in one night. He makes it every time Mack looks at him across a room. Every time he sneaks into Mack’s room after midnight. Every time he catches Aiden watching him like he knows. Like he’s just waiting for Will to screw this up.

But Will doesn’t want to screw it up. He wants this. Wants Mack. And, against all odds, Mack wants him back.

So when they pack the car for the long cross country drive back to campus, Will slides into the backseat, next to Mack. Aiden looks at them in the rearview and says nothing. Just adjusts the mirror, starts the car.

Will leans into Mack’s shoulder.

Because some rules are made to be broken. Especially when love is the one writing them

[astral-herald]

Uncritically Enjoying Mage Viktor

sometimes when i turn off my angry (logical) brain, i achieve some very sentimental mage viktor clarity that i would like to share <3

this is a lot different from my other Thoughtful "Analysis" Posts. my plan is as follows: address my understanding, slim though it may be, of mage viktor; bullet-point all the less than critical/theory driven reasons why he makes me happy; make a somewhat melodramatic point about reading/viewing for fulfillment over critique. mage-tor enjoyers, unite!

What is Mage Viktor's Purpose?

Try as I might to turn off my thoughtfulness, I am typically critical of the media I enjoy, so I'll be among the first to admit that Mage Viktor was certainly a retcon. That seems to be the fandom consensus, so I won't reiterate too much on that point. It makes shots like this especially funny, though, because that is simply not the Viktor we know, interdimensional or otherwise:

But something I would like to push back on is a pervasive "favorable" read on Mage Viktor as we come to know him in season 2. I fully disagree with the idea that Mage Viktor sought Jayce out in every timeline because he loved Jayce, rather than as a means of saving the countless innocents Viktor in other timelines would inevitably kill thanks to Hextech, the Glorious Evolution, etc. Hear me out for a second!

Bestie @arowyn-m pointed out to me that Necrit confirmed that Hextech is THE canonical event, the linchpin, so to speak, that ignites the chain of events we see culminate in season 2. These are the same events that Mage Viktor seeks to prevent. It takes however many lifetimes and iterations of mass destruction for Mage Viktor to gather two vital facts about the universe: Hextech is the inciting, inevitable incident, and Jayce is the complementary indelible constant. Hextech is inevitable, but only Jayce can show Viktor how to stop it.

Viktor's love for Jayce is not what motivates Mage Viktor to seek him out - it is the inevitable result of their being "inextricably bound." Reducing Mage Viktor's manipulation of time/space/what have you to his desperate need to protect Jayce in every timeline morphs him into a very out-of-character Genocidal Eldritch Being when he's supposed to be the antithesis of OUR Machine Herald Viktor. By taking up Mage Viktor's quest to kill Machine Herald Viktor under these very specific circumstances - acceleration rune in hand - Jayce can end the cycle. He trumps the inciting incident. His love for Viktor reigns supreme.

The fact that this is so awkward to explain speaks to the severity of the retcon. I guess what I'm getting at is that Mage Viktor was not acting out of selfish, obsessive love (as romantic as that may seem to some); he was searching for a way to right his wrongs and found it in Jayce, his inseparable other half.

"Only you could show me this."

MORE TO THIS POINT: even Mage Viktor, for all his implied wisdom, having seen countless lifetimes wherein they failed to stop Hextech, still does not anticipate the depth of Jayce's love for him. He (presumably, because don't see this exchange, because Riot made egregious cuts) tells Jayce that the Viktor of this world must die. Jayce "can't fail." As far as I can tell, he never tells Jayce that he has to die along with him. Jayce rejected Viktor's bid to be partners again, after all...

Mage Viktor, like the true Viktor that lurks within the Machine Herald, still believes that Hextech is fully his fault. He still believes in his own weakness and his shortcomings and is so reliant, obsessed with independence that he refuses to share this responsibility. When Mage Viktor reveals himself to Machine Herald Viktor, and he's confronted with the depths of his own feelings, he shoves Jayce away in a last-ditch attempt to preserve his isolation.

Jayce does not allow this.

The love that keeps Viktor "inextricably bound" to Jayce is not one-sided. Viktor, in all iterations and timelines, does not bear the responsibility for Hextech alone. In his dying moments, when he finally understands that LOVE is what has kept he and Jayce together all this time, his humanity returns to him. They save the world - literally. Love literally conquered all. No Viktor, not even Mage Viktor, anticipated this. All Jayce really had to do was kill this Viktor, but he couldn't bear to part ways.

TLDR: Mage Viktor found a way to save the world, but Jayce found a way to reignite Viktor's humanity. Neither of things could coexist without the other.

Smaller, Less Important Reasons Why I Like Mage Viktor

I'll never forget the breathless whiplash I felt upon Mage Viktor's reveal. I feel pretty alone in that experience - oh well! I'll be the pariah! - but here are the reasons why he's made such an impression on me.

Seeing an aged Viktor hit me like a bus. I know he's still stricken with the arcane, but there's so much wisdom and kindness and life experience in his expression. I never thought we'd see that. I doubt he did, either.

BEARD VIKTOR TRUTHER.

It gives Viktor some agency back. I wrote in an earlier post that Mage Viktor being the one to liberate Viktor from his own tragic narrative is pretty awesome, and I stand by that.

Mage Viktor's vulnerability. I feel like Mage Viktor, finally realizing that this Jayce is the right one, that this moment is the pivotal one, says a lot of what Viktor in all timelines longs to say to Jayce.

The question of lifetimes - how many times did Viktor search for Jayce? How many times did he watch a timeline go by without him? How much loneliness did he endure (for the greater good?). What was it like seeing that in-universe Viktor had killed Jayce?

Reading Uncritically (I Swear This is Relevant)

Rita Felski, a very cool literary critic who we all should read, said the following about reading critically (the way that lots of us engage with Arcane on tumblr): "It is a mode of interpretation that adopts a distrustful attitude toward texts...that remain inaccessible to their authors as well as to ordinary readers" ("Suspicious Minds" 216). Even though she's writing about academia/literary criticism, I think her point still stands. We engage with media with the intent to expose, unearth, and problematize. We eagerly search for moments where the text fails us at the expense of the "superficial" that would otherwise uplift us. We are practicing the "hermeneutic of suspicion," which can be exceptionally draining.

It's pretty melodramatic of me to apply this kind of theoretical work to Arcane, of all things, but this story means a great deal to me. It is deeply flawed - the Mage Viktor retcon is kind of appalling if you stare down the barrel of suspicion. But, in looking through a reparative lens (Eve Sedgwick's word, not mine), I see Mage Viktor as a agency-ridden Viktor, an aged Viktor, a vision of the future Jayce and Viktor together make possible. I'm enriched by that.

Felski asks us: "How else might we venture to read, if we were not ordained to read suspiciously?" (232). What can we derive from Arcane by putting the pieces together with the goal of harmony and fulfillment? In the smallest sense, we may feel a bit better about the ways in which season 2 seriously let us down. In a larger, more hopeful sense, moments like Viktor confessing an ultimate love and attachment to Jayce, and Jayce returning it in kind, may fill us with an even deeper appreciation for unconditional love as the culmination of human connection, a world-ending and world-renewing thing that stares down the BBEG of Arcane and wins.

You could probably read all of this as my apology for enjoying what so much of the fandom has condemned. That's alright. There are so many pieces of Mage Viktor that fragment under the critical microscope, but I can't shake the emotional impact of his reveal, so I'll live in that space for the time being. Had Arcane allotted for any explanatory conversations, flashbacks, and/or given up their soft world build to account for Mage Viktor, we'd be in a better place plot-wise. Alas, here we are instead. Everyone can point and laugh at me if they did all this just to bring back God/Made/Eldritch Being/Whatever The Fuck Viktor in future projects. That'll be my penance!

And, finally, if you really didn't like Mage Viktor, I fully respect that, but this is my self-indulgent post and I'm not overly interested in debating...there's little anyone could say that I wouldn't agree with. I'm just avoiding the suspicion of it all :)

[vroomvroomcircuit]

Early Risers vs. Night Owls

(A/N): Special thank yous to @foreveralbon and @disneyprincemuke for helping me choose which drivers are morning people and which are more of night owls.

Summary: Some people are night owls, others are morning people. But there is another sort that some drivers learn to fear: Morning Monsters (it's the reader)

Pairings: (All platonic) daniel ricciardo x driver!reader, charles leclerc x driver!reader, carlos sainz x driver!reader, oscar piastry x driver!reader (max and lando get a guest starring)

Word count: 1.2k

🏎Masterlist🏎

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It’s difficult, being a night person in a day people’s world. It really is. Especially when you are around morning loving human beings.

“Oh, don’t you look happy?” Carlos comments, when (Y/N) steps into the breakfast room. Coincidentally, several teams are accommodated in the same hotel during this race weekend.

As she lets herself fall in a seat at his table, the young female whispers an annoyed “Don’t”. “I wasn’t saying anything mean?” He genuinely questions. Is his English failing him again?

“Please, just stop talking. It’s only the ass crack of dawn, how can someone be so chatty?” (Y/N) puts her head onto the table, effectively stopping any further conversation with the Spaniard. He looks a little bit lost into his fruit bowl, not sure how to handle this situation adequately. 

“Top of the morning, my sunshines,” a smiling Daniel Ricciardo strolls into the room. The happiness radiating from him reaches (Y/N) even through her closed eyes.

Just as Daniel arrives at their table, she gets up with the most sluggish motions a sober person can muster. “Coffee” is the only thing mumbled, answering to the confused looks around her.

Shortly after, she sits down again with a cup in her hands, not even bothering to try to follow the chatting between Daniel and Carlos. (Y/N) just stares into space, wondering where she went wrong in her life to have to sit in between two morning people. Surely, this is a punishment of some kind.

“Ok, what is up with you? You look like you are about to murder everyone in this room if someone just dares to breathe in the wrong direction,” Daniel observes. (Y/N) takes another sip from her coffee. “Because it’s true.”

Carlos can’t wrap his head around it. “But what happened to the sunshine-in-person-(Y/N)?” “How am I supposed to be a sunshine, when I’m barely a person at this moment?” Well, that is not a lie. She does look pretty rough. Not everyone can wake up and look perfect like Florence Pugh. Some people have to look more like Merida herself in the mornings.

“Why are you talking to this woman during the early hours?” Charles, who just entered the breakfast hall, fears for their lives. “Because this is what people do? They talk when they sit together?” Daniel is confused. What is so bad about making conversations?

Charles steps closer to their table and (Y/N) immediately latches onto him, burying her face into his stomach.

“Don’t you value your life? A tired (Y/N) in the morning needs quiet and some hugs.” The young woman mumbles something, making the Monegasque laugh. “Yes, and coffee. This is the recipe to get the sunshine person you know and love.”

Confused, the other two drivers blink. Did they miss the manual that came with the rookie?

“And you know all of this, because?” Carlos asks the question that popped up in both their heads. “Because (Y/N) and Arthur were together in F2 and he had been ‘chewed out by her like a pack of gum by a class of elementary schoolers’, his words, not mine. She is not all bark and no bite, isn’t that right?” (Y/N) nods, her head still buried into his front.

“Do you want to catch a ride to the paddock with me? I plan on leaving in five minutes.” (Y/N) nods again and quickly gathers her things before waving the other drivers goodbye.

The ride is filled with silence, Charles even leaves the radio turned off. This lets the female drive in and out of a state of half-asleep until they arrive at their destination. At the same time a certain papaya wearing aussie his own car not far away from Charles’ Ferrari.

“Oh, is it still too early?” He asks her with a small smile. Just like Arthur, Oscar is aware how much of a night owl (Y/N) is, having witnessed her outbursts first hand several times during his own career in F2.

The driver nods as she throws herself into his embrace. A tired (Y/N) turns into the most cuddly person. “Let’s get you a cup of coffee, can’t have you go around screaming at people. You will scare everyone off.”

Oscar is pretty much the only smiling person she tolerates in the morning. Whenever another human being dares just grinning in her direction during her own waking up phase, she is ready to jump their throats. But Oscar is different. He doesn't do it out of mocking or pitiness. He is genuinely happy and wants to show and share it. Also, he radiates a nice calm aura, which is the complete opposite to what she experiences during the days of a race weekend.

When Carlos passes (Y/N) by later, he walks up to her with caution, keeping his teammates' warning in mind, “Hey Carlos, have you heard the rumors about the newest Taylor Swift album? Do you think it will feature a song about Nando?”

The woman in front of him has nothing in common with the one he interacted with just an hour ago. She somehow even looks completely different from her. It’s the kind of freshness that doesn’t come with a shower.

“Uhm, no I did not. Are you ok? You seemed… a bit out of it this morning.” There is a hesitation in his voice, not wanting to accidentally offset her.

But (Y/N) just laughs it off. “Oh yeah, that. I’m sorry for being a grump back there. Just like Charlie said, I’m absolutely not a morning person. During the first hour of being awake I’m an absolute monster. Just, don’t talk to me or only when it’s absolutely necessary during that time. I apologize for my behavior, it wasn’t nice. Today was particularly bad, because I do my best work at night and I have been pouring over some data until 2 am. I’ll try to give you a warning next time!”

With that she is off, looking for her partner in crime aka her teammate to start some kind of mischief with the social media team.

Carlos is just flabbergasted. The duality of some people and how a small cup of caffeine can bring that out of them is astonishing.

Just remember to never fuck with night owls during the early hours of the morning.

Bonus Scene

During a free week some drivers set a date to play a private paddle tournament together in Monaco. Daniel enters the court with a big smile. After all, it is a fresh, sunny morning. This day is a promise of having a good time with his friends and colleagues, playing their favorite game and having lunch plans together.

What sets the Australian off are the three frowning faces, sitting on a bench nursing each a can of Red Bull solemnly. “What happened to you?”

Max answers his question first with a grumpy voice. “I had to leave my cats cuddled up in my bed alone.” “My alarm woke me up while the first number on the clock was still a single digit.” Landoo sounds about as tired as (Y/N) next to him looks like.

“Life”, Daniel answers for the young woman already, who just nods and pulls the strings of her hood closed, hindering someone else to make more conversations with her until the caffeine has kicked in.

Desperate times call for desperate measures after all.