#like uggh!!!!! this is more a personal rant but seriously!!!!

[kug-the-carrot]

Really hate that when I want to look at the very few Murderbot videos on YouTube I am forced to see the thumbnail of that guy complaining about TMBD in order to praise another series

I mean he's allowed his opinion obviously but I know he already made a separate video on tmbd being "overrated" so let Binti stand on its own for fucksake. Binti is a wonderful book, it is so rich and beautiful, but it's completely different thematically, the things it has in common with TMBD are being an award winning sci-fi novella and being published by Tor

Like why are we pitting two bad bitches (gn) against each other

[fizzingwizard]

Episode 30, the alleged halfway mark, at last!

I’m fresh out of jokes so let’s hop right into the review!

Pictured above: Characters who supposedly exist in this series

More under the cut as usual

So last week I listed the things episode 30 needed to do to make me not hate it. They were: 1) Sora had to stay with Taichi and be part of the action, 2) the other characters had to feature here and there to progress their storylines even if the main focus remained on Taichi, and 3) WarGreymon’s appearance needed to be dramatic.

Well... guess who didn’t get Bingo this episode -_____-’

I am... seriously... mind-boggled. This is bizarre. Yes, we all understand that evolutions just aren’t the big deal they were in 99 Adventure, BUT this episode DOES try to convince us that WarGreymon IS a big deal. It just fails at it spectacularly, in my opinion at least. As for the rest: Sora stays with Taichi, but he tells her to take the helpless Digimon to safety and then we don’t see her do anything but stand around waiting for Taichi. Most of the other characters don’t even get a cameo, let alone story progression. Taichi reflects on them briefly at one point but it’s unbelievably stupid. Only Koushirou has anything to do and he is STILL JUST STARING AT HIS COMPUTER.

My expectations for episode 30 weren’t super high, given the current storyline, but I’m honestly slackjawed by how BORING this episode was. They really seem to have decided to rest the entirety of the show on Taichi, and much though I love him, I just don’t think he CAN carry it by himself. Not only has he long been unbelievable as a grade school kid even for shonen anime standards, he doesn’t crack jokes, he doesn’t show personality... all he does is fight. Like, the show isn’t ALWAYS like this - I’ve legit enjoyed it a various times, and I know why - it was always when the team was together and we learned things about them and the fighting was balanced out. So I never know from one week to the next how I’m gonna feel about the new episode. But I do think this is the episode I hate the most to date. :/

We had a promising start with Garudamon still actively fighting several Megadramon at once, simultaneously barbecuing Sora.

Fortunately it’s magic so she’s not dead, nor has she fallen to death.

Taichi and MetalGreymon continue fighting the Allomon on the ground.

The mysterious Lopmon looks on with a judgmental glare, wondering why he isn’t currently being carried like a baby. Walking is hard, he wants to be carried. Taichi do your job

Taichi: cmon lopmon you have to learn to do things on your own

Lopmon: no I want to play video games

Taichi: well then I refuse to buy you any more games. if you want them you’ll have to get a job and earn the money

Lopmon: daaaad! youre ruining my life! uggh!

Koushirou keeps an eye on the misbehaving satellites.

Taichi and Sora debate what to do. It’s difficult to protect the forest Digimon while fighting at the same time, so Taichi tells Sora to bring them to safety while he fends off their enemies on his own. WHAT THE HELL IS THIS PLAN. Since it’s a shonen anime, I normally wouldn’t whine about this but... it was just last episode that we were shown Taich cannot cope with the combined attack of that many enemies at once on his own. He needed Sora’s help. Why he now thinks he can do it is a mystery.

Taichi can maybe handle the Allomon and Megadramon on his own, but last episode Tankmon also appeared, and this time, lo and behold, in comes Parrotmon. Sorry Taichi but you brought this on yourself.

Meanwhile Koushirou communicates with “someone from the Internet” and learns that the satellites are all rerouting to converge on the same location:

The freaking International Space Station!

Which will then surely explode! And cause lots of trouble both in space and on earth!

^Pictured: Koushirou’s “oh shit” face

^Pictured:MetalGreymon’s “oh shit” face

MetalGreymon proved to be weak to the lightning Parrotmon emits. If there’s a reason, they don’t explain, but I like the idea that he’s particularly weak to it because he’s a cyborg and the electricity disrupts his... circuits :P Then Parrotmon gets hit with a beam of dark energy and evolves!

Into Klosmon? Krosmon? IDK, IDC.

^Pictured: Taichi’s “oh shit” face

They get their butts handed to them. Taichi and Agumon fall unconscious. Rather than take the chance to deliver the finishing blow, Klosmon or whatever politely waits for them to wake up.

Taichi’s consciousness is swept into a white empty world...

where he finds the Crest of Courage looking weirdly sentient... or maybe that’s just me...

MetalGreymon just looks possessed

Taichi: Are you alive?

Agumon: Yeah... you okay?

Taichi: Yeah... uhh... well... sort of...

Not being dead = I’m still ok

So here’s where the episode really loses me... After visiting the blank world, Taichi is suddenly able to recall what happened after Devimon ate him.

This makes little sense since he seemed pretty KO’d at the time, but okay, find, he woke up long enough to see WarGreymon and now he’s remembering it, sure why not. But I hate that they did this whole “ohh he doesn’t remember!” thing and then solved it like this. Presto! Now he remembers! It’s maaaagic!

And as ADORABLE as the two of them holding hands like this and resolving to keep fighting is... I just can’t be impressed by a battle with Parrotmon. Or Klosmon or whatever it is now. There’s a reason most shows save dramatic moments and big epiphanies for battles that actually progress the storyline. It makes a much bigger impact. This just feels like someone saying “Woohoo it’s Tuesday!” and then you ask “what’s special about it, is it your birthday or something?” and they say “Nope I just felt like being excited that it’s Tuesday!”

I mean points for optimism and all but it doesn’t make a very good story.

Taichi helps Agumon walk x’D They are planning to keep fighting even like this.

And I get that the “never give up!” attitude is essential to the shonen anime protagonist, but when you literally can’t walk by yourself anymore, it’s important to take care of your health is ALSO an important message this show might consider teaching kids once in a while -.-”

In spite of his unsteady legs, Agumon’s still able to evolve again and powers up to fight Klosmon.

It uh... doesn’t go well.

The one cool thing here is the way Taichi sets about attempting to make MetalGreymon evolve. Although we already knew the children play an important role in evolving their partners, Taichi seems to really understand it now, and focuses deeply. It’s a much more active role than we’ve seen before - it seems like more than the usual “encouraging thoughts and emotional ties” spurring the evolution.

At least he’s still super cute.

So we have already seen the Crests many times, I knew that... but my theory was that, in order to reach the final evolutionary stage, they would need the help of the physical Crests. So that’s what I thought Mimi was doing with those crystals.

But Taichi is indeed about to call WarGreymon. So... I have no idea what use Mimi’s gonna find for those crystals x’D I suppose she’ll make herself and Palmon matching necklaces. Or sell them on the black market.

From her super safe hiding spot, Sora watches in awe, wishing she too were a real character on this show and not just an inconvenience as far as most of the writing staff are concerned

I love WarGreymon’s shield.

BAM. He appears. It’s dramatic. But only just.

WarGreymon defeats Klosmon and explodes the forest... Uhhh, weren’t we supposed to be protecting it?

Taichi and WarGreymon then join Sora and the forest Digimon and uh... that’s the episode.

Oh yeah, we get one more hint that Lopmon is more than just some random idiot. Lol. This episode hinted at Lopmon, reminded us that Hikari’s been abducted, and told us that the International Space Station might explode, and then addressed none of those.

The message on the bottom says that the next episode will be on January 10, meaning there will be no episode next week as per usual due to New Year’s holidays.

Next week’s episode:

Turns out Lopmon is one of the holy Digimon or something. Honestly not a surprise, I mean, it’s Lopmon. Should have occurred to me earlier.

Also we got what I think is our first named mention of Millenniumon and it looks like Hikari might find out somethig about him. So that’s cool. The rest of the episode seems to stick with Taichi and Sora’s group... The only thing I can say hopefully is that, since WarGreymon’s appeared, MetalGarurumon ought to be not too far off. So that should mean we at least get a Yamato-centric episode in the not too distant future.

Okay, a couple weeks ago I said I had some stuff to say but would wait till episode 30 to do it... so stop here if you don’t want to read me ranting :P It mostly amounts to what I complained about in the beginning: This season is just so hyper-focused on the fights and seems to treat the team aspect as an afterthought. Which makes no sense to me. Honestly, I don’t mind the excessive fighting - that’s common in shonen anime and grown up me can’t expect to be interested in the same stuff that interests 8 year old boys.

I don’t even mind the idea of Taichi’s role as main character getting an upgrade - like, in 99, he was the main character, but it was felt a lot less. Better balanced with the others’ roles, I mean. I think it’s totally okay to make Taichi a more central character and the plot focus in the new season - it wouldn’t be my choice, of course, but that doesn’t mean it’s inherently bad. But the way they’re going about it just doesn’t make sense to me. Even Taichi isn’t interesting half the time. He just fights.

Like I said before, this isn’t the way the show always is. There have been some highlights. I truly loved a few episodes, and the show does seem to have fallen into a pattern of being good for a while and then degrading into something like today’s episode. I don’t know why: budget? pandemic? or is this really, legitimately, what the show producers want to show kids? I guess, in the end, this show really may be about selling toys and selling toys only. (But, if that’s the case, I’m even more surprised that they don’t make a bigger deal about all the evolutions...)

A lot of things I liked the most happened in the very beginning - the first three episodes in particular. The characters interacted with each other. Their feelings and actions influenced each other. Fighting happened, a lot, but it wasn’t the only thing happening. I was pretty excited then. I didn’t expect to love this show like I love 99 - that’s just not possible, I’m too old and 99 is too special to me for me to trust my judgment - I was just happy to see the Adventure kids back and entertaining a new generation.

But since then it’s been a roller coaster with few highs and a lot of lows. Although it’s hard to imagine how the pandemic would have changed the storyline, episode 4 was where they paused the show for Japan’s lockdown-but-not-really, and once they picked back up the tone just seemed kind of different from the first three episodes. Not right away - I think the intro episodes for the rest of the team were pretty reminiscent of “Digimon Adventure” - but that makes sense, they had 4 ready to go and probably had made headway on the next few episodes before they closed down the studio. Anyway, that’s just a guess, since it seems like everything’s been affected by the pandemic, but with a few exceptions we have all been back to work more or less normally since June...

The thing is, there are lots of fighting shonen anime - tons of protagonists who never give up and never fall in spite of how hurt they get, and who get unlimited “evolutions” in return for their tenacity. That’s all fine. It’s the genre. But the thing is...! The thing is, those other shows, they all tend to have humor, to care at least marginally about character relationships, and understand that that’s how you build up a main character: just winning fights alone doesn’t cut it. So I just don’t know what to make of this new Adventure show. It’s FINE when the team is together. We get cool character moments and insights and even some joking around. But they KEEP SEPARATING THEM. This time they didn’t even have more than a single episode together before they were all split up again! I wonder if it’s because they’re having trouble getting all the voice actors in due to pandemic-related issues and budget issues etc. If so, HUGE bummer. Of all the years for Digimon Adventure to get a reboot... why did it have to be this miserable excuse for a year...

Le sigh.

But there’s nothing we can do about it. I’m just going to like what I like and hope for the best in the future. I really would love for the new Adventure to be popular with kids and keep that cast going. I don’t expect it to compete with the lids of Kinmetsu no Yaiba or anything. I just hope that, when we hit the final episode, we look back and say that the season was overall worth the reboot. I hate the thought of looking back and saying “well, that sure was dull.” It’s just an insult. 99 Adventure wasn’t the most unique storyline in the world, but it had a lot of uniqueness IN it, and what made it special was its treatment of the team and the child-partner relationships. The reboot doesn’t need to be exactly the same, but it shouldn’t be forgettable.

That’s why us being at the 30 episode mark concerns me. At this point we know how the show is paced and what’s it like. We can’t really argue that we just don’t know enough to make a judgmenet yet. It’s hard to believe things will suddenly change. If they do, assuming the change is for the better, I’ll be thrilled, but I’ll also feel sad that we missed out on so many chances for cool things to happen in the first half.

[incorrectsmashbrosquotes]

Total Drama Smash Bros: Episode 2, Part 2 Something Fishy This Way Comes...

*Wario wanders around a dark and fog-filled campground by a lake, looking in vain for the tell-tale signs of the Camp in question, unfortunately it seems like he's in the wrong place*

Wario: Welp, that's it, I'm lost. Sakurai damn it! What's a guy got to do to steal a measley twenty-million around here!?

*An unknown 1st Person POV shot begins tracking Wario through the abandoned campground while breathing heavilly*

Wario: Dammit Ganondorf! You couldn't of hidden your summer camp of torture somewhere more accessible?! And what's this shit about not inviting me to help in your revenge fetish story?! And what the hell is up with this place?! Camp Crystal Lake?! What kind of bullshit name for a camp is that?! You might as well name it Camp Super Happy and be done with it! Why I outghta-

*Wario is interrupted from his rant by the 1st Person POV approaching behind him. Wario turns to see a massive mountain of a man in ragged clothes wearing a hockey mask and wielding a machete.*

Wario: Oh, hey there buddy. You okay? You're breathing kind of heavy. You need a cough drop or something?

*The man does not respond, merely continues breathing heavily and glaring at Wario*

Wario: Hey, buddy! I'm talkin' to ya! *More silence* Look buddy, you're kind of violating Wairo's personal space, so I'm gonna have to ask you to back off.

*The man does not respond, merely lifting up his mask and allowing Wario to see his face before replacing it*

Wario: Woah! Buddy, that's one hell of a condition! I've got some skin cream in my bag, here let me get it for ya. *The masked man raises his machete as Wario fishes through his pack.*

------------------------------------------------------------------ ----------------------------------------

Back at the Fishing Grounds

*The boats have shoved off and the teams have departed. Some are doing well! Others are doing... not so well.*

(Erdrick and Robyn's boat)

Erdrick: I got one! We're eating good tonight!*Begins reeling in his line*

Robyn: Wow. That was fast.

Erdrick: Almost here... almost here...! *he reels it in revealing it to be... an old boot* Aw, tartar sauce. *he glumly throws the boot into the boat*

(Roy and Samus' boat)

Samus: Jeez, how do you use this thing? It's so primitive!

Roy: Well, how do you usually go fishing?

Samus: I get on a aqua terrain suit, load up my spear-gun, and take the offensive. None of this waiting around crap.

Roy: Right, future, forgot. *sighs* Here, let me show you.

Samus: Right. So, where's the prime interface so I can load up the targeting system?

*Roy facepalms*

(Link and Bonny Janet)

Link: *staring at the water thoughtfully, surveying the whole area*

Bonny Janet: Oi! Elfy! Ya goona let ma in oon tha' big secret?

Link: Just determining the best place to fish. Have to take into account water currents, sunshine, and a whole bunch of other- fuck it. *Link jumps into the water and reemerges a minute later with a Spotted buck-Salmon clenched between his jaws*

Bonny Janet: BLOODY HELL! Do ya always fish like thaat?

Link, spitting the fish into the boat: My ancestors used fishing rods, but Mipha taught me to fish like a Zora. Lots more efficient.

Bonny Janet thinks for a moment before an evil grin comes over her face: Oi. Ya think ya could get moore tha' way? We git moore, oone fer each oof our team... an' wee've goot a good chance o' winnin'!

Link, pulling himself into the boat: Huh. Good idea Bonny.

*The two look over to see Marth struggling to thread a fishing line through a hook and Joker shooting into the water with his gun, trying to hit one of the fish.*

Bonny Janet: Oi! Princey! Witch-son! *Bonny throws the fish Link caught at their boat, smacking Marth in the face, knocking him down*

Joker, picking up the fish from an unconscious Marth: Thanks Bonny!

*Link and Bonny Janet give a thumbs up which Peach sees and grows frustrated*

-

Confessional

Peach: This is bad. Link and the imp working together?! This is seriously bad news.

-

(With Erdrick and Robyn again)

Erdrick: Ooh! Ooh! I know I got one this time!

*Erdrick reels in his catch only to be another boot.*

Erdrick: Gods dammit!  *tosses it beside the other boot*

(With Lucina and Dark Pit)

*The two are sitting in silence together*

Lucina: Hey, DP, you want some? *holds up a bag of chocolate covered peanuts*

Dark Pit: Sure, hand 'em over.

*Lucina gives DP some*

-

Confessional

Dark Pit: I appreciate Lucina. She's knows that sometimes people just don't want to talk.

-

*Lucina suddenly gets a bite on her line*

Lucina: Shit! It's a big one! *Lucina does her best to reel in the catch. Dark Pit comes up behind her and helps her haul up on the line* Almost! There!

*The catch finally breeches the surface and they see that they have hooked a massive shark. All three simply stare at each other for a long moment before Dark Pit slowly reaches forward and cuts the line. The shark disappears beneath the waves and Lucina slowly puts down her line, curling into a ball*

(With Peach, Zelda, and Pit's boat)

*Peach, Zelda, and Pit have carefully followed Link and Bonny Janet as they've fished up a small pile of their prey to distribute to their team.*

Peach: Okay Zelda, now's your chance. Drive the wedge! Drive it!

*Zelda looks reluctnant but nods*

Peach: And Pit. I need you to sneak over and steal all those fish while they're distracted!

-

Confessional

Peach: I hated to drive Zelda and Pit like that, but I need this prize money! Bowser's conctant kidnapping of me, destroying my kingdom over and over, and the subsequent repairs and reparations have left the royal coffers practically empty! The Mushroom Kingdom needs the financial boost.

-

Confessional

Pit: I'm not sure I like how Peach is running this alliance. I want to win too, but Link and Bonny seem to be finally making friends. I know I'm not very smart, that's why I let Peach and Zelda call most of the shots... but I don't know about this.

-

Zelda: Oh, Link! You're real good at this!

Link: Thanks Zelda! It's good to know we're still friends even though we're on different teams

Zelda, looking even more guilty now, continues: You probably could have caught more if Bonny had contributed more.

Bonny Janet: Oi! Where do ya get oof ya pastel pint! Ah've helped more than ye've helped yer team!

Link: Hey! Lay off Zelda! She's not used to doing stuff like this.

Bonny Janet: Ooo ya! She joost sits in 'er castle 'an let's folk like ye do all the werk! Didn' know ye were soocha  doormat Elfy!

Link: Zelda's done lots to help Hyrule! And I'm not a doormat.

Bonny Janet: Soonds lake soomethin' a doormat would say!

*As they argue neither notice Pit surfacing from the water beside their boat*

Red: Hey!

*Bonny and Link turn to see that Red and Leaf have come up near them*

Leaf: Both of you, cut it out! You're on the same team! You can tear each other apart AFTER we win. You're teammates aren't you? Act like it!

*Both Link and Bonny shift uncomfortably*

Bonny: Aye. Ah' suppose ah' woos a wee bit harsh.

Link: And I think I spoke rashly.

Bonny: Aye... peace? *she offers her hand*

Link: Yeah, pea- HEY!

*Both turn and see Pit swimming away with their catch*

Bonny Janet: YOU DIRTY THIEF!

Link: Dammit!

Red: Sorry guys.

Bonny Janet: Oi! Elfy! Can ye catch more?!

Link, frowning: I don't know... maybe?

*Peach, meanwhile, grabs her team's bucket of bait, a load of chum, and hurls it into the water around Link and Bonny's boat*

Link: Oooh, that's not good.

*Instantly over a dozen sharks surface around them with evil grins on their faces*

(With Erdrick and Robyn)

Erdrick: Oh boy! Finally!

Robyn: If it's another damn boot.

Erdrick: No way! It's way too big to be a boot! *Begins to reel it in* We're... guaranteed... to win! *Erdrick hauls up his catch... only to find it a massive crate full of boots*

Robyn: I don't know why I expected any different.

*A massive whistle suddenly sounds out and they all turn to see Ganondorf on the shore*

Ganondorf: And that's it kiddies! Time's up!

Corrine: Time's up! But you- You- uggh. I'm not even going to bother.

Ganondorf: Good call! Now haul in and let's see what you've caught!

--------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------------------

*The Campers are all assembled. The Koopas all hold fish distributed to them by Peach's team's ill gotten gains. Link and Bonny, bruised and beaten from their shark attack, glare at the three offenders. Pit and Zelda look down guiltily.*

Ganondorf: What a fishing trip that was! Way better than I thought it was gonna be.

Red: Yeah. *Glaring daggers at Peach and company* A lot more theivery than I expected too.

Ganondorf: True, but not against the rules. *Ganondorf takes in the teams* Now, only Marth and Joker managed to bring in a fish... but it's the biggest one! Goombas take this one!

*There's a bit of shocked silence before the Goombas start cheering and the Koopas look on in shock and anger*

Peach: But! B-but-

Ganondorf: If you'll recall, I said only that the team “with the biggest fish wins”. Not how many. Quality over quantity.

Bonny Janet: Boo yeah!

Link: Hell yeah! *the two high five each other*

Ganondorf: That mean that the Goombas will have the advantage in part two of today's challenge. We'll be right back with the exciting conclusion of Episode 2... of Total, Drama, Smash Bros!