#like they're my type on paper 😭😭

[kdelarenta]

y'all i have a confession to make - mal is kinda hot 😭🤚 NOW LISTEN, i know they're evil and a part of me wants to start a fight w them at the diner parking lot HOWEVER, the other part of me wants to make out with them. legit the only reason i'm not romancing them is my ego, like i'm not letting them win no matter what 💀 if anyone's gonna win this game it's gonna be me bitch (endearing).

[cerbreus]

baking never feels more like science to me than when i'm trying to cobble together an intricate multi step recipe together from several different recipes and tutorials online because the recipe I'm imagining doesn't exist....

[ice-devourer]

why is it so hard to think about soft skills to put on a resume T — T

[love-belle]

my sunshine !!!

*ੈ✩‧₊˚ in which they're the 'it' couple and everyone's obsessed with them, rightfully so.

or

for when you find your forever kinda person. ˚ ༘♡ ⋆｡˚

social media au // lando norris x fem!reader

warnings - language

author's note - finally it's here!!! i really hope u like it!!! thank you so much for reading, i love you <3

edit - changed it bc the person who requested it doesn't speak hindi x

≡;- ꒰ °twitter ꒱

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, lilymhe and 799,416 others

yourusername 💐

tagged landonorris

7,728 comments

username i think i just died and went to heaven

username SHUT UP EVERYONE

username babe wake up y/n is slaying one again

username SHE'S SO ETHEREAL GODDAMN

carmenmmundt the most beautiful 🤍

-> yourusername all you angel 🤍

username SHE'S SO 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

username she's everything to me ❤️

lilymhe holy shit marry me ?

-> yourusername wdym you're already my wife???

-> lilymhe even better 🥰

-> landonorris she's stealing my girl again alex_albon

-> alex_albon should've never introduced these two

-> lilymhe stay mad x

username MOTHER IS MOTHERING

username just reject me so i can move on PLEASE.

username PLEASE THE LAST SLIDE

username her in traditional clothing is something that's so personal to me like 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

-> username im ready to throw these hands for y/n

charles_leclerc lando has been staring at this for 20 minutes

-> landonorris CHARLES

-> yourusername HELP

username lando is me

username just one chance pls 🙏🙏🙏

landonorris woah hahaha hey

-> yourusername hello 👋

landonorris i love love love youuuuuu

-> yourusername i love love love youuuuuu more

landonorris HOW ARE YOU SO PRETTY

-> yourusername IDK WHY ARE U

landonorris marry me 🫡

-> yourusername is this your way of proposing to me

-> landonorris is this working

-> yourusername no

-> landonorris what happened to "i like shiny things but i'd marry you with paper rings"

-> yourusername i have yet to see a paper ring so

-> landonorris wow.

-> usernames honestly parents

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, carlossainz55, pierregasly and 872,915 others

landonorris something about taylor swift and saving me a seat at every table

tagged yourusername

8,528 comments

username THEY'RE MY PARENTS OMG

username SHUT UP JUST SHUT UP

username i'll be on the highway if anyone asks

username ahahahahahah im fine!!!!!! im okay!!!!!!!!

username ok.

danielricciardo highlight of the whole outing was watching you crash that golf cart and then cry about it

-> landonorris just because you can type out a comment doesn't mean you should

username I LOVE THEM HELP

username LOVER

username they're so lover coded 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

username goodnight that's enough singleness for one day 🫡

username i don't know who to be jealous of tbh

charles_leclerc you should never be near a golf cart ever again

-> landonorris IT WAS AN ACCIDENT OKAY????

-> username WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE GOLF CART I NEED TO KNOW

username they're so in love it makes me wanna throw up (in a good way)

username screaming crying throwing up sliding down the wall bashing my head

lewishamilton loved seeing you last night!! the golf inchident definitely made my week!!

-> landonorris so glad to know my embarrassment is amusing to you

username i need them to adopt me like now.

username lando i seriously need to know if u can fight or not

yourusername you're my my my loverrr

-> landonorris yes i am 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😘😘😘😘😘😍😍😍😍😍

yourusername but they're all right, never drive a golf cart again

-> landonorris NOT YOU TOO

username lando malfunctioning everytime y/n LOOK at him despite being together for such a long time is so relatable of him like ACTUALLY

username god i am not ur strongest soldier 🫤

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, carmenmmundt, landonorris and 799,725 others

yourusername chellam ( sweetheart )

tagged landonorris

comments are disabled for this post

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 913,816 others

landonorris 4ever and ever my girl. i love you.

tagged yourusername

comments are disabled for this post

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by lewishamilton, carmenmmundt, landonorris and 89 others

yourusername a series of unfortunate events

tagged landonorris danielricciardo

7,928 comments

username I DIED OMG

carlossainz55 i feel bad for laughing

-> landonorris at least you feel bad, y/n just laughed for 10 mins and then made fun of me 💔💔💔

-> yourusername but i love you

-> landonorris i love you so much more

-> carlossainz55 THE TONE CHANGE

username THE DOLL IM CRYING

username i would sell my family to witness this irl

username y/n bullying her bf and im here for every second of it

landonorris did you really have to do me dirty like that

-> yourusername it's my love language

landonorris you promised you wouldn't laugh

-> yourusername i'm not laughing

-> landonorris love i can hear your giggles from the living room

-> yourusername that's not me lol i'm out with lily and carmen

-> landonorris WHAT DO YOU MEAN I'M HOME ALONE

username Y/N TERRORIZING HER BF EVERY MOMENT OF THE DAY AND I EAT IT UP EVERYTIME

-> username that's what he gets for stealing my wife thank you very much

lewishamilton pity i missed seeing it in person

-> yourusername i just sent you 8 videos of it from different angels

-> lewishamilton this is why i like you more than lando

-> landonorris fuck you both.

danielricciardo is it safe to come out of my hidden place?

-> yourusername negative. lando is still out on a hunt for you.

-> danielricciardo does he still have the fork?

-> yourusername it's a rubber spatula now

-> landonorris not my gf airing out my business to the enemy what is this economy

-> yourusername you're hardly secretive with the amount of noise you make every time you enter a room so !!

username they're so chaotic bruh i love her

username DANIEL'S FACE HELP IM CRYING

-> username it was at that moment he realised. he. fucked. up.

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, carmenmmundt and 886,688 others

landonorris sadly only 3 out of 26281927 made it to the gram 💔

tagged yourusername

8,931 comments

username SHE'S SO

username IM IN LOVE

username jaw drops to floor eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets heart beats out of chest awooga awooga sound affect pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out slams fists on table rattling any plates bowls or silverware whistles loudly fireworks shoot from top of head pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth wipes comically large bead of sweat from head clears throat straightens tie combs hair ahem you look very lovely GRR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF ARF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF WOOF WOOF GRRR BARK GRR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF ARF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF WOOF WOOF GRRR BARK GRR BARK BARK WOOF WOOF ARF BARK BARK WOOF ARF ARF WOOF

-> yourusername babe are you okay?

-> username ahsjdjdkeksmssd;;;;72hsshskksk

username she's so 😭😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔

lilymhe girlfriend 💐🤍

-> landonorris right??? MY girlfriend

-> username lando forever getting defensive with lily around will never NOT be funny

-> username it's bc he knows that y/n and lily can and will absolutely wife eachother up

*liked by yourusername and lilymhe*

username IM ON MY KNEES GODDAMN

username HOW DOES IT FEEL TO BE GOD'S FAVOURITE

-> username this is me yelling at lando btw

-> landonorris pretty good haha i know how lucky i am

-> username GOODBYE.

username SHE'S A REAL GODDESS LIKE WOAH

username lando better wife her up before i do (threatening)

*liked by landonorris*

username im SOOOOooooOOO normal about this

carmenmmundt i expect an email with those 26281927 photos

-> landonorris duly noted

username everyone being obsessed with y/n is so real of them actually

username lando norris i am under your bed.

username she's for the girls and the gays i don't make the rules.

username IM SO AHHASHSJDHSKSK

yourusername thank you for being my personal photographer ❤️

-> landonorris only for you ❤️

yourusername also thank you for choosing good photos of me 🫡

-> landonorris that's so not true because every single photo of yours is the BEST

-> username im blushing and he didn't even say it to ME

username god me when.

≡;- ꒰ °instagram ꒱

liked by landonorris, francisca.cgomes, charles_leclerc and 896,599 others

yourusername just look at him if you have a vitamin d deficiency ☀️

tagged landonorris

8,732 comments

username HE'S SO SUNSHINE BOY

username STOP HE'S ADORABLE

username im love with both of them actually

username no bc he's her sunshine 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

carlossainz55 my eyes hurt from looking at this post for too long

-> yourusername they're being blessed so 😮‍💨

-> landonorris thank you baby 🥰

username lando always being 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰😘😘😘😘😘😘😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 with y/n is so

username i need this couple like serotonin every day im not joking

username god i knew u had favourites

username SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

username babe wake up my parents are being cute on the main again

lilymhe opened this app and saw this abomination what is this torture.

-> landonorris BLOCKED.

-> yourusername relax you both can be my side hoes 😘

-> lilymhe SIDE?

-> francisca.cgomes bebé ❤️

-> yourusername kika ❤️

-> landonorris that's a betrayal i did not see coming

-> lilymhe same omg

username HE'S SO GOLDEN RETRIEVER BOYFRIEND

username that's a look of pure joy like im smiling by just looking at these photos omg

landonorris my ❤️

-> yourusername my sunshine ❤️

-> landonorris i just need to hear those 5 words

-> yourusername i love you so much

-> landonorris cute but try again

-> yourusername i won't wife up lily

-> landonorris thank you ❤️

username THIS IS TOO MUCH FOR IM DONE

username sigh this is so 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔

[coff33andb00ks]

İdk i just got hit with this shitty idea 😭😭 drabble list thingy 5 40 60 64 and 70. BUT WITH ACADEMIC RIVAL OSCAR? IDK ITS KINDA STUPİD BUT STİLL 😭😭

driver + number = drabble <3

warning: author knows nothing about academia 😳

"Idiots, they're all idiots."

You glanced up at the sound of his voice, perplexed. Then, realizing he couldn't possibly be talking to you, you turned back to your work. You'd come here in the hopes that you'd be able to finish your paper without the distractions in your dorm, and so far–

Thud.

The heavy backpack landed on the tabletop with much more force than necessary and you glared at its owner, who - horrifically - was pulling out the chair across from you. As usual he was wearing his stupid burgundy shirt under his stupid black hoodie, and his hair was falling into his eyes with that stupid little swoop.

The only thing stupid about Oscar Piastri was his lack of style.

"You don't mind do you?" he asked, already settling into the chair with his coffee.

"I'm annoyed, to put it mildly," you muttered, staring at the backpack crushing the corner of your pencil pouch.

"Ah well, the feeling's mutual." He pulled his backpack towards him and threw down a copy of the local newspaper. Odd, that he actually read a physical newspaper instead of getting his news online like everyone else born after 1985.

You carefully maneuvered your pencil pouch closer to yourself and tried to focus on your paper. Intent to ignore him, you managed to type out two whole sentences before he snapped open the newspaper. Darting your eyes towards him, you watched the morning sunlight dance over the angle of his jaw.

Too bad he was such an insufferable know it all. Half the students that you knew from the classes you shared with him called him Hermes Granger behind his back, he was that bad. Always had the correct answers in lecture. Always top marks. Always, always, always, while you were just behind him.

Except the one time, but he'd been in hospital due to his roommate Lando accidentally tripping him and fracturing his rib, so that didn't really count.

"Did you hear about this?" he asked suddenly, thrusting the newspaper in your direction.

You looked from the paper to him, half expecting him to pull it away before you could take it. He didn't though, and you turned it so you could read the small headline.

No Evidence of Foul Play in Missing Money

Frowning, you read the small blurb about thousands of dollars that had seemingly vanished from a local charity. "How can there be no foul play?" you asked after reading it through twice. "It was there one day and gone the next."

Oscar nodded. "Exactly. And you know who's on the board, right?"

"Dude, I barely know my roommate's name most days..."

"Yeah I reckon you've got too many classes–"

You narrowed your eyes at that, missing half of the rest of what he said.

"–the mayor."

You snorted on a laugh. "Are you insinuating the mayor stole the money?"

He wasn't laughing. Or smiling. In fact, you were pretty sure you'd never seen Oscar smile. Well, that pained half smile when Lando dragged him to a party, but otherwise...

"You can't be serious," you said. "He's the mayor. He's got plenty of money."

"Does he?"

Rolling your eyes, you slid your laptop close and tried to focus on your work again. "Didn't have you down as a conspiracy theorist."

"It's not a conspiracy theory though?"

"The mayor, who lives in a mansion and drives a Ferrari, stealing ten thousand dollars from a charity?"

"People in power have stolen less. He's very good at hiding secrets. Like his brother's company being behind the factory buyout last year? The government doesn't want you to know this, but every one of them are crooked."

"What do they put in your coffee?" you asked with a roll of your eyes. "Do you get a tinfoil hat to go with it?"

He scoffed. "I thought you were smart."

That surprised you. You didn't think Oscar thought about you at all. "So what do you suggest, Oscar? We storm city hall and demand the mayor give the money back?"

He pursed his lips and dipped his head to one side as though to indicate the idea had merit. "Or we could sneak in after hours and poke around."

"Break into the mayor's office," you clarified.

He nodded. "Tonight after dinner?"

"Set off alarms, get arrested, and go to jail."

He winced. "Yeah, maybe not our brightest idea."

"Excuse me, did you–"

"But we can still do dinner, yeah?"

"Idiots. They are all idiots." / "I'm annoyed, to say it mildly." / "The feeling is mutual." / "The government doesn't want you to know about this." / "Not our brightest idea."

[captainlexapro]

Tkachuky Derby & Hughesapalooza - 2024

*click for better detail- apologies for the lighting and general quality of the pics 😓!!*

acrylic on paper

please don't steal or repost 💚

inspired by this tweet specifically (plus credit to the earliest twitter mentions i could find):

Made these for my fellow brothers bowls enthusiasts!! Especially those who know it’s all about the intricate webs of familial narratives in athletics. and the concepts of destiny and talent. and brothers as both allies and adversaries. and the bonds between siblings. and…

links to inspo, reference images, and other thoughts below the cut!

THEY'RE DONEEEEEE!! 😭🙌 i spent probably 2-3 full days' worth of time from concept sketches to final products. so much paint. so much frustration. they're still not perfect - there's little issues on both (if you notice something, i promise i'm aware of it!!) but 'fixing' stuff in acrylic often leads down a rabbit hole and i just had to call it and be done.

there's intentional little details on both - let me know what you catch! hopefully you can see them okay 😅

*i know they play each other more than once per season but i only wanted to make these for their first '24-'25 meetings)*

Let's get some whimsy up in here now, boys!

Derby:

team colors - Panthers Senators

matthew reference

brady reference

Kentucky Derby posters inspo

I wanted to keep the derby poster more 'clean' graphically. lots of derby posters have sharp lines of color and lots of movement, so i knew i wanted large swaths of the team colors somehow (thanks to the ppl that voted on my poll for what the team color shaping should be! i did follow the winning choice lol) chose poses where they look like they are moving in the direction of the 'flow.' generally wanted to keep focus on the idea of matthew vs brady, so i have them 'looking' across the way. was originally going to put in outlines of skylines for cities relevant to them, but that proved to be way too big of an undertaking so i scrapped that idea and came up with some different references. put some detailing for each of them that i'm reallyyyyy hoping you can see when you like zoom into it, but here’s some closer pics:

their last name is ukrainian for weaver, so i wanted to put a little nod to that somehow. not sure it will translate/be clear to viewers, but i limited myself by making the poster so damn small...*I* know they're there and can see them lol if it's not clear to ppl i will come back here and explicitly say what they are lol

Palooza:

team colors - Devils Canucks

luke reference

jack reference

quinn reference

Music posters inspo

inspired by lolla/music posters. wanted a more 'fun' vibe overall. while the derby poster would be more for say like, putting on a wall or hypothetically used for marketing purposes, palooza was more marketing poster and maybe on a t-shirt, too. definitely wanted a calligraphy type font for the name - just felt it out and came up with that shaping. tried to reference lolla a bit. used the devils and canucks coloring - and combo of those (did you notice?) - for the palette. wanted it to be a bit more pop graphic-ish (and hopefully not too cartoony). used some hockey/venue shapes and references, as well as some little hugheses-specific easter eggs...fun fact: the reference pic i used for jack is the EXACT SAME as his nhl25 cover. they just edited it to have the devils' home jersey colors. (i was like wait a second....i know that pose. bc i've been staring at it trying to paint it for hours!!!)

some pics of the palettes and initial sketches:

If anyone has fun nicknames for other nhl brothers bowls, i’d be open to making more posters! Lmk!

If u read all this just know i love u and hope you have a good day 🫶

[loveephia]

you as nekoma's beautiful manager.

content: (🦷) tooth-rotting fluff, kenma has a small crush on you, reader is as pretty as kiyoko shimizu and alisa haiba, karasuno featured in the bonus.

⚠ warning/s: none.

inarizaki ver. | shiratorizawa ver. | fukurodani ver. | aoba johsai ver.

oh dear

now, it's no surprise that the boys have been wanting a manager for the longest time

and you just so happened to stumble into their gym while trying to look for the girls'

you wanted to tryout

but it's okay! you can still walk out and make it to the tryouts—

wrong.

because once yamamoto saw you in your tracksuit, assuming you'd be their manager, all hell broke loose.

guess there's no turning back now

"PRETTY.. MANAGER.." yamamoto falls to his knees and

ok, now, imagine him crying in the jojo artstyle

yeah, that's him rn

you don't know why, but two people in the back did a high-ten and yelled out, "yakisoba!"

yaku is sO KIND AND CARING although lev could say otherwise

kai helped you adjust to the team's stupidly loud antics 😭

kenma just nods at you and goes back to practice

kuroo recognizes you because you're one of the smartest students in nekoma. your report card, from top to bottom, is all filled with lines of 9 (grades from 90-100)

and it's safe to say that he's intimidated

because you're pretty, intelligent, and totally his type 🫦🫦

inuoka gives you a charming smile and you feel ten times lighter than when you first walked in the gym today

"woah, you're really pretty." lev, honey, yk you can think to yourself, right?

fukunaga welcomes you with a joke

"what kind of streets to ghosts haunt?"

"dead ends?" you respond

oh my gosh, is it you? is it really you?

are you the destined one he's been searching for for all of these grim years?

".. yeah, dead ends." fukunaga mumbles.

it's only day one, and you got the entire team admiring you already

nice kill 💯💯

1 point for nekoma 0 for karasuno

you sign the papers that need to be signed, and BOOM!,($!] you're now on trial!!!

everyone was kind!! they politely asked you for tosses, gave you reassurance and encouragement, and they helped you carry a few things to the gym!!

now they're taking a break, and kenma sat on the floor, pulling out his gameboy

you tried to sneak a few glances at what game he's playing, and you recognized it! it's the game you play in your spare time at home!!!

you try to peek at his level, but it's hard to see due to his hair

"you know, you can just.. ask me questions, right?" he asks

you knew that of course >:(

you sit next to him and ask for his level, and it turns out he's a few levels lower than you

sooner or later, you're giving him tips on how to play the game, and WOW HE'S A FAST LEARNER

he went from 15 levels below you to only 3 now

his motions were swift, and you couldn't help but stare starry-eyed as he played

why's kenma feeling warm all of a sudden

it's not even summer yet

maybe he needs some potassium

kuroo notices you two and is happy that kenma has someone he can share his interest in gaming with, like how kuroo shared him his interest in volleyball

BONUS

nekoma welcomed karasuno at the entrance, having been the only school here that karasuno is familiar with.

then suddenly, nishinoya and tanaka are wailing in the background while yamamoto laughs maniacally. "yes, oh, dear, karasuno! look at our beautiful manager!" you stood there idly. you were just trying to carry some fresh produce to the kitchen before yamamoto pulled you aside..

kuroo facepalms at yamamoto's behavior.

© lowercase intended | loveephia

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

hii wifey!!! okay it's currently super late where i am right now and i can't sleep 😭 but ever since my post on @dirty-little-mind33 i- i haven't been able to stop thinking of dbf!tangerine 😫

like like JDJSJDDJHFFJ

it's giving your dad's hired hitman and they're friends or whatever (don't ask for the specifics, I'm half asleep) and he takes a liking to you and he treats you like a princess FR

keeps you in check so you stay out of trouble, little touches, "love", "princess", "sweetness", "SWEET GIRL" ANRJRNENDN like it's giving the same vibes as bodyguard!tan.

can just imagine him sitting in an armchair of your living room, legs spread bc he's a man and it's sometimes super hot (don't sue me), and he asks you for a lighter and so you hand him one and he blows smoke in your face as he thanks you and calls you his good girl 🥵

okay sorryyyyyyyyyy this is so long i just needed to share and hear your thoughts 🫶

on another note, dbf!logan is also sooo hot but that's for another ask 💖

my wife!! hi wifey! so this will be like im talking to you directly, like im typing everything my brain is thinking in real time. it makes it personal and intimate, I love it. enjoy 💞💞💞💞(also sorry only just got round to this)

no bc you’re so onto something EURRRGGHHHH!!!!

and like okay right so! he’s been working for your dad for a few years and bc it’s only been a few years he’s not known you long (meaning he didn’t see you grow up etc bc that’ll be😃🤮) and like when you visit ur parents or idk you live with them (pick what you fancy) you see him at the dining table with your dad and got all the papers out and laptops etc and they’re chatting about work stuff/ plan

idea time. you go past them and into the kitchen and your dad is none the wiser looking at the papers and maybe questioning the prices but tans looking at you in the kitchen. and tans like “do us a couple teas would ya darling” (ew tan, why would you say that? have you no respect? no shame?) and he’s being all cheeky bc of the darling. but your dad doesn’t think anything of it, like it’s a common petname kinda thing. and it makes your ears prick and turn to look at him and he’s all smug????? and nodding at you????

this is really getting away from me but im not done, you’ve got me going 😭😭😭

tan definitely tests the waters, pushes the boat out LOADS. like he’s so teasing and cheeky in how he does it. def touches your back when ur dads in the same room, looks at you during dinners, sits opposite you during said dinners and touches you with his foot (but not in an gross way bc feet are disgusting) or sits beside you during said dinners and spreads his legs so his thigh bumps yours AND AHHAAHHAGAHA OMG THIS IS KILLING ME has his elbows wide on the table so he takes up more space and feels your arm up with his

and if you’re in the garden after dinner getting some air bc of what happened at the table. he’d come out and join you. but not properly. you might be at the end of the garden sitting at the patio table or something and he’s on the steps by the back door having a fag. like he’s keeping an eye on you but not making it obvious for your family inside

he’s also always offering lifts! so like if you don’t have a car or it’s in the shop or idk blah blah you ask your dad for a lift and tans there and he offers to drive you. and you’re like “no it’s fine” bc sitting in a car with him will make you like idk but like yk GO CRAZY. and tans all like “it’s no fuss. gotta pick something up that way anyway” and your dad is still oblivious so he’s agreeing to it like “tan’ll take you” and tan grabs his keys and he’s nodding you along like (okay don’t hate me for this. I don’t have a daddy kink but this idea is sending me and I need to say it) he’s all like “what daddy said goes” 😫😃😫😀🫠👍😉😔😖😱😰��🤭🤔AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASAAAAAHHHH!!! and it has a double meaning!!!!!!!!!!!! bc he means your dad but also him!!!!!!! and the ‘take you’ bit!!!!! he also means that he’ll take you. like fuck you. so it’s all a huge double entendre

GOD THIS IS KILLING ME!!!!!!!!! making me wanna do something with dbf tan now

but he’s such a gentleman about it. like he’s teasing and smug and cocky but he’s still very charming and charismatic about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and when he drops you off he’s looking at your ass getting out and then opens the window to talk to you through the car and he’s like “call me if you need me”

and you’re like “why would I call you?” like shouldn’t he be saying to call your dad????

and he’s all like “you know why”

and you’re like “huh?” looking at him all weird

AND YHEN HE SAYS “he don’t pay attention to you like I do” GOOD DUCKING GOD SJJABSJDBS

im gonna have to stop there bc I know I never will. plus I have rice cooking and the timer went off 5 mins ago so I really gotta run😭😭😭😭

but you’re so right about him being the same as bodyguard tangerine!!!

[lovelykil]

DUDE…. Kyle and Stan reacting to there S/O asking for hand pics… (I have a rlly weird fucking hand fetish, my bad 😭)

─Headcanons─

kyle & stan x reader older ver.

hc; asking for hand pics

cw; none

note; HELPP no cs me too......... ermm anyway 😊 ⤵

Kyle—

omg his hands are pale, nice, and slender

Big but not too much, and they are surprisingly soft.

I say surprisingly because he plays basketball.

You'd think they're maybe rough.. they are– he just uses lotion to make his hands soft to the touch

Makes him feel better and clean

Anyway

You LOVEE his hands you sometimes just admire them as he helps you with homework.

Your gaze was drawn as he moved the pencil across the paper, his hand guiding the tool. Some veins faintly appeared as he did so.

You couldn't help but imagine what he could do with them right now if he wasn't blabbering about math homework.

Alright now the GOOD STUFF

As any other person who was just asked if they can send hand pics, he is very much flabbergasted.

He was just writing an essay for his English class when he saw the text, he was so CONFUSED and concerned.

disclaimer I didn't know what the hell to do for usernames so matching it was 🤦🏾‍♀️

He stared at his phone like

'😧' and then '🤨'

Why do you want a hand pic???

For what reason would you send that for 😭??

Well..

He got his answer ☠️

His face IMMEDIATELY went red, setting down his phone to process this situation.

It took like 2 minutes for him to calm down before he took a breather and grabbed back his phone.

He opened his camera and set his hand on his desk, trying to figure out a good camera angle.

I don't know why but bro was stressing

But he finally got a pic he was sorta okay about 🫶🏾

His brain process during this was just all like

what the hell

Why

Why

No I don't like this angle, how about this way

My hand looks stupid she's gonna hate it :(

WHY IS SHE EVEN INTO THIS ANYWAY

I am dating a weirdo.

Anyway he opened back your chat and sent it after a few uncertain seconds.

BARKBARKVAK4KEKKEES

okay sorry, that is literally how I see his hands

so yummy 🤤

After that text message sent, he set that phone down so fast.. and immediately went to type back on his laptop again.

He wasn't too crazy about this request though nothing would compare to when you asked for that whimper audio from him.

He still thinks about it till this day, wanting to die inside

It's okay tho cause you were happy :3

anyway on your end when you saw his notification pop up, you clicked on it FAST

thirsty ass mf

The way you grinned so hard was insane, you were kicking your feet and giggling when you clicked on the photo.

You saved it to your camera roll to add to the rest of the hand pics you secretly had of Kyle..

He doesn't know about this and never will

You went back to your messages with him and texted back

something is purring

and it is not a cat.

Stan—

He wears rings (ohohohoo)

His hands are rough and have calluses from playing his guitar.

Not too rough though just a neutral rough if that even makes sense

When you guys hang out he sometimes likes playing for you

SOMETIMES.

he's a lil shy, he practices alot to play for you so he doesn't look like an idiot.

Sooo that's why his hands are so rough. But you kinda liked it anyway?

The way his chipped black nail-polished fingers strummed his guitar made your stomach do the thing.

Plus his sliver and black rings?

Oh god

It's just the way he glides his fingers tbh I swear

Like play with me like the way you play your guitar 🫤!!

☠️

anywho

Stan was laying in bed, scrolling on TikTok

The usual when he can't sleep and you were already asleep.

Well he thought you were asleep, you sent him a gn text??? But he received a text message 20 minutes later

He's in a little blushy blushy mess now.

What will he do? Send the pic so his gf can rest peacefully? If you said yes...

WRONGG

I'm jk

Idk kinda almost chill wit it? But he definitely felt a little vomit come up in his throat from you thinking of him.

I mean he cares a little like why would you ask that 😭

But it's late so he doesn't really question it

In the pitch dark he snapped a photo of his hand, checked to see if it looked decent then sent his pic.

His rings were off in his 1 😞

but nonetheless you smiled hard, when you saw the picture

Something about his hands screamed

LOSERR that or I just have a problem

but in a hot way ofc, he's a loser but your loser

You giggled like a whore, getting yourself comfortable on your bed.

You then replied back

😭😭

[scarletgray]

Soukoku fic 5+1 Things

sskk if you squint

(this is my first fic ever 😭 i dont have a title for this so suggestions are welcome!)

5. Comfort

The sheep took good care of him. They taught him many things. They taught him how to read and write. They told him about different types of food. How to talk to people. How to play rock, paper, scissors and how to shoot a gun. They were the first people in his life whatever miserable way it started. The sheep would always be a part of him and he would carry them with him no matter where he went or who he was. But the most important thing they taught him, he thinks, is how to comfort someone when they're upset.

He remembers the day a stray cat Yuan had picked up and brought back died. It had upset Chuuya greatly too. But he had known it would happen. The small, dirty white kitten they couldn't take care of when they could barely take care of themselves was bound to die. He remembers yuan sobbing in the corner of their rackety hideout. She wouldn't eat for days. Chuuya was starting to panic. So he did what he does best. He went up to her and told her exactly what was on his mind.

"Hey..." he said, cringing at the sorry attempt of a soft voice.

"Hey listen I know you're upset but will you please stop crying and eat something. You'll get sick." he said, mouth twisting downwards.

Yuan had stopped crying then, looking up at him with her tear streamed face. Chuuya really wished he could take her pain away.

"Is this your way of comforting me?" she asked incredulously.

Comfort? He hadn't known what she meant. He didn't know how else to say it. He had no other way of showing his concern.

After seeing the confused look on his face she let out a little laugh. Chuuya jumped at the sound.

"You look like a puppy tilting your head like that" she smiled, still teary eyed.

Chuuya scowled at that, though secretly happy she was smiling again.

"What else was I s'posed to say?" he mumbled, kicking at the ground lightly.

Yuan smiled at him. It was a sad smile. And then Chuuya thinks that for the rest of his life, he'll never forget the look on Yuan's face and what she said next.

"You don't have to say anything." she had said.

Then she stood up and walked towards him. Gently, she started pulling his hands out of his pockets. He tensed, but let her guide his arms around her abdomen and then slowly wrapped her arms around him too.

"What are you doing?" he asked, blushing at the proximity. The touch of another human felt foreign to him, even after so many years with the sheep.

"This is called a hug." she giggled, "It's how you comfort someone when they're sad."

"Oh." he mumbled, warmth spreading through his chest. "But I'm supposed to be comforting you?"

She hugged him harder. Urging him to tighten his arms around her too. He felt as if he was floating. He looked down to see if he accidentally activated his ability but was met with the sight of yuan's feet on the ground. Huh.

"I know chuuya is sad too." She whispered quietly. "Doesn't this make you feel better?"

Chuuya was taken aback. Had he been sad the kitten had died? He thought of it now, and how adorable it had been. How the tiny mewing had all the kids laughing. How everyone had still been fighting over a name for it when it fell ill. Yes. He was sad too. He just didn't express it as strongly as Yuan did.

"Yeah. Yeah it does. I'm sorry Yuan." he said, burying his face in her pink hair. He felt a prickling sensation in his eyes. Is this how it felt to be held? Chuuya never wanted to let go.

She backed away from him first.

"Next time you want to comfort someone and you don't know what to say, hug them. It will make them feel better."

And just like that Chuuya was left with a life lesson. When someone is sad you should give them a hug.

4. Fever

Chuuya wasn't sick.

He sneezed. Again. And then three more times.

Okay maybe he was sick. How could he have let this happen? He had rarely ever gotten sick back when he was living in the streets with the sheep. He was always healthy and at the top of his game. Was the mafia making him too lazy? He rarely did stuff on his own now that he had subordinates kissing the ground he walked on. Seriously, what was up with that? Ane-san said it's because they respect him and look up to him. Dazai said it's just because he's young and an easy mark to climb ranks with. He won't believe anything that the bastard tells him, but he can't quite agree with Ane-san either. Why would anyone wanna stay by his side? He winced, all that thinking was making his head hurt.

Speaking of Ane-san, he was walking down the hallway to her office when suddenly his head started spinning and his vision blurred. He quickly jerked his hand out grabbing the wall to keep his balance. The pain doubled, it was like someone was drumming a hammer against his skull. His eyes hurt.

“Chuuya?”

Oh shit. Ane-san was standing right in front of him. When did she get here? Chuuya looked up at her, squinting. He was met with the sight of her worried face.

“Lad are you alright?” She asked, frowning.

“Uh...” Chuuya couldn't form a coherent sentence. He couldn't move his body the way he wanted to. “Um…” he mumbled, unable to say anything else.

Kouyou’s face mellowed out. She bent forward lifting his face up with one hand and tilting his hat back with the other before softly pressing her lips against his forehead.

Chuuya froze. What was she doing? He tried to take a deep breath that ended up with him inhaling her scent. She smelled sweet, like green tea and flowers. All of a sudden, he started to feel really sleepy. Chuuya felt his legs give out, just before he could eat the floor, Kouyou pulled him into her arms.

“You have a fever lad” she stated, clicking her tongue.

Fever? Oh right. He was sick.

“Sorry” he mumbled against her yukata, feeling oddly guilty for being this weak.

“Nonsense. Nothing to apologize for child,” She replied, slowly walking him towards her office.

She laid him down on the couch as soon as they entered. Chuuya closed his eyes. He could hear Kouyou moving around. The sound of clinking metal from a kettle and the click of a tea cup in a saucer slowly lulled him off to sleep…

“Lad…” said a faraway voice.

Chuuya woke up with a jolt and a hand on his shoulder gently pulling him upright. It felt like he had been asleep for eternity. He groggily opened his eyes. Ane-san was standing in front of him with a tea cup in her hand. She passed it to him.

“Drink this,” she said, patting his shoulder.

“Thank you” he mumbled. Bringing the cup to his lips and drinking the warm concoction. He had no idea what it was but it smelled soothing and immediately dulled the ache in his bones.

He continued taking small sips until he finished the drink. Kouyou took the cup out of his hands, putting it down somewhere behind her before turning back around and pressing her lips against his forehead. There. She did it again.

“You're still warm,” she hummed.

“What are you doing?” he questioned, still drowsy and confused. Why did she keep giving him forehead kisses?

Kouyou gave him a small smile.

“I'm checking your temperature, don't you know this is the best way to check?”

No. Chuuya did not know. He thought everyone checked it with their hand? He frowned, he still didn't know a lot of things huh.

He heard a laugh. He looked up, baffled. Did Ane-san just laugh?

Kouyou was hiding her face behind her fan but Chuuya could see the mirth in her eyes.

“You are so cute.” She said, pinching his cheek.

“What was that for?” Chuuya squawked, embarrassment making his cheeks heat up.

“Nothing nothing” she tutted, patting his shoulder again. “Go home lad, and get some rest.”

“But-”

“No buts. Go home, that's an order. And don't come back until your fever is gone. I'll be coming in to check every day.”

“You don't have to do that” he muttered, “Okay okay fine I'll rest,” he said childishly. He wasn't used to taking breaks.

He thanked Ane-san again, grabbing his hat from the couch and turning to leave. Being sick was so troublesome. But at least he got something good out of it.

Now he knows how to check someone for a fever.

3. Kiss it better

Dazai was having a bad day.

Which wasn't unusual. But today was an exceptionally bad day. He had been forced to go on another annoying mission by Mori-san that resulted in him getting stabbed in his side. It hurt. Dazai hated pain.

He sighed, wincing when the movement hurt his side even more. What else did he expect from useless subordinates who never carry his plans out correctly. It was times like this that he missed Chuuya. He never gets as much as a scratch when he has Chuuya guarding him like the protective dog that he is. Dazai started grinning to himself. Maybe he'll go check on Chuuya today. And annoy him so much he'll start his high pitched squeaking that's supposed to sound threatening. Ah yes, that'll distract him from the excruciating pain he was pretending to ignore.

Dazai started daydreaming about what kind of insults he'll use on the slug today, imagining Chuuya’s reaction to every single one. He zoned out a little too much and bumped into something tiny.

“Chuuya!!” he beamed, looking down knowing who it was immediately. There was only one person in the world who was so small.

Chuuya's unimpressed face was staring back at him.

“Watch where you're going bastard,” Chuuya snarled, sidestepping him and heading towards wherever he was trying to go. Now that just won't do, Dazai thought to himself.

“Apologies, I didn't see you there, you see I don't have a microscope with me, my mistake!” Dazai said cheekily and waited.

“What the fuck did you just say?!?!” Chuuya screeched, turning around and grabbing his collar. “I'm not that small shithead!”

There it was. Dazai started giggling. Chuuya's reaction never failed to amuse him.

“It's not my fault Chuuya is so tiny I can't see him,” Dazai jeered.

“Shut the fuck up I don't have time for this” Chuuya shoved him, hard.

Dazai doubled over wheezing. Okay maybe making the chibi angry wasn't such a good idea. Chuuya had pushed him exactly where he had gotten stabbed. Which, by the way, really, really, hurt. He could feel the blood starting to soak his bandages. Ugh he'd just wrapped them up too.

“Oi Dazai?” Chuuya's worried voice pulled him out of his internal grumbling.

Dazai peered up at him. Chuuya's worried face was really cute. Yes that's right. Dazai Osamu thought The Gravity Manipulator, Most Dangerous Ability User, and former King of the Sheep Nakahara Chuuya was very, very cute.

Dazai had long accepted the fact that he liked Chuuya. From the moment he saw him, buried in rubble, and a boot planted on his chest. He had felt something in his hollow heart. Chuuya made him feel human. Made whatever small, cold heart of his burn with affection. Dazai could not escape it, nor did he want to. He let it consume him, he drowned in it. Being with Chuuya was like being on fire. He'd never admit it of course, but he was sure it was quite obvious. However, the mafia was no place for love. So he'd keep those feelings to himself. Besides, if he'd had to take a guess, from the look on Chuuya's face right now, he'd say the slug might have a thing or two for him too.

“Shit you're bleeding.” said Chuuya, grabbing him and pulling him close. “Why the fuck didn't you say anything idiot”

“I didn't think Chuuya would hit me,” he whined.

“You asked for it, asshole” Chuuya grumbled.

“Chuuya's mean” Dazai pouted, “I'm bleeding because of Chuuya and he's bullying me”

“You're the bully” he retorted, and then without warning, lifted Dazai into his arms bridal style.

“Wha- What are you doing!? Stupid slug put me down!” Dazai yelped. He could feel his cheeks warming up. Stupid chibikko, how dare he manhandle dazai when he's so much bigger than him!

“I will,” Chuuya nodded, “In the infirmary.”

“Hatrack” he taunted, putting his arms around Chuuya's neck in a futile attempt to strangle him. Chuuya kept walking infuriatingly unaffected.

“Mackerel”

“Petite Mafia”

“Waste of bandages”

“Double black small”

“LAY OFF OF MY SIZE JACKASS I'M 17 I'M STILL GROWING!!”

“That's what Chuuya said when we were 15 and yet you didn't grow an inch.”

“I did and you know it!”

Their banter was cut short when they arrived at the infirmary. Chuuya unceremoniously dropping him on one of the beds.

“Ouch! Chuuya's such a brute!” Dazai complained.

“Hold still shitty Dazai,” Chuuya responded.

Chuuya started pulling his coat back and lifting his shirt, inspecting the blood soaked bandages.

“I'm taking these off.” he said and then looked at Dazai as if waiting for his permission. Ah, his dog really was so cute.

Dazai didn't say anything, leaning back on his arms, giving Chuuya the space to unwind the bandages. Chuuya nodded in silent understanding, and softly began to unwrap the blood stained strips, careful not to agitate the wound. Dazai knew he felt guilty for opening the wound, and took it as his responsibility to patch it up again. That's just who Chuuya was. A boy with a heart too big for his tiny body. It was one of things he loved about him.

Chuuya worked in silence. With full focus, tongue peeking out of the corner of his mouth. Dazai watched him working so seriously, wrapping the bandages like his life depended on it, and he couldn't help a little chuckle that escaped him.

“The fuck are you laughing about” Chuuya grunted.

“Nothing.” said Dazai tilting his head to the side with a smile as he started humming a tune and kicking his feet, feeling content.

Chuuya raised a brow. “Do you have a fever?” he asked, then out of the blue, pressed his lips against Dazai's forehead.

What. the. hell.

Dazai shrieked. Why was Chuuya suddenly kissing him!?!? Chuuya's lips were soft and warm against his skin. The touch burning his entire face. He could feel the blood rushing up to his head. He started feeling faint. Oh maybe that was the blood loss.

“What are you doing?!?” Dazai squeaked.

Chuuya looked at him confused, “Checking your temperature obviously? You're burning up dumbass.”

“And that's how you check!?”

“Duh. Ane-san told me it's the best way.” Chuuya stated like it was common sense.

“And you believed her?”

“Yes…?” Chuuya said slowly, as if it was the simplest thing in the world .

Now because Dazai is a genius it took him only 3 seconds to figure out what was going on. Then he grinned maniacally.

“I see,” he said, “Chuuya's really stupid.”

“The fuck is that supposed to mean!?” Chuuya growled, then suddenly started smiling, “What you didn't know that huh? I wouldn't expect you to.” he stated smugly.

“Yes yes I didn't,” Dazai said. Chuuya started pulling away from him. Yeah no, Dazai just could not let this opportunity go to waste.

“Wait, where are you going? Aren't you gonna kiss it better?” he cooed, innocently.

“What the fuck are you on about now”

Dazai was trying to hold it in, he really was.

“Doesn't Chuuya know you're supposed to kiss it better?” He said, “It hurts and it's Chuuya's fault!”

“What kinda fucking rule is that?” Chuuya asked incredulously.

“Of course Chuuya doesn't know,” he sighed dramatically, “When your partner gets hurt you're supposed to kiss them better.”

“No?” Chuuya didn't know anything about this!

“I understand,” he nodded, trying not to laugh out loud, “It's only natural Chuuya doesn't know about this after all he's just a teeny tiny dog with an even tinier brain-”

He was cut off as Chuuya swooped down and kissed his cheek soundly, exhaling softly against his face before pulling back.

Dazai exe. has stopped working.

Chuuya was staring at him, cheeks furiously red and frowning cutely. “Like that?”

Dazai couldn't take it anymore. He burst out laughing, doubling over, giggles racking his frame. Tears started gathering in the corner of his eyes.

“The- The wound! N-Not my face!” he wheezed between the laughter.

He didn't think Chuuya could blush any harder but he was proven wrong as Chuuya's entire face turned red. Chuuya started shaking with anger or embarrassment he couldn't tell but it was a sight to see.

“You lying piece of shit!!” Chuuya screamed and started shaking him back and forth while trying to strangle him.

“Wait! Wait! I wasn't lying,” Dazai said, wiping the corner of his eyes, “It's the truth, it doesn't hurt anymore,” And it was the truth. The wound didn't hurt one bit. He felt no pain at all. His insides were all giddy. Chuuya really was the best medicine.

“Whatever, fuck you Dazai,” Chuuya huffed, “Now go home and heal properly and stay the fuck out of my way.”

“Chibi wait,”

“Fucking what.”

“You know you're not supposed to do this with anyone else right? Only your partner.” Dazai had to make sure Chuuya wouldn't go around kissing everyone's wounds better. He wouldn't put it past him. He couldn't believe how gullible the slug was!

“I know that!” Chuuya yelled, slamming the door on the way out.

Dazai sat there for a long time, daydreaming about all the ways he could get hurt in missions and all the kisses that would be his reward.

2. Hold hands

Chuuya knocked on the double doors two times before letting himself in the boss's office. He barely set a foot in before placing a hand on his hat and ducking to dodge the flying shoe that whizzed past his head.

“Stupid Rintarou, I hate you!”

Chuuya sighed. Today was going to be a long day.

“Boss, I'm here.” Chuuya spoke, his voice getting ignored.

“You always do this! I said I wanna go eat sweets. I don't want to go shopping for stupid clothes!” Elise cried, flapping her arms around.

“But Elise-chan, just one store please, I promise we'll go for sweets after~” Mori whined pathetically. Chuuya coughed, loudly.

“Oh Chuuya-kun you're here,” Mori said, immediately reverting to a serious demeanor.

“Yes boss.”

“Chuuya!” Elise noticed him now as well. “I'll just go with him.”

Oh no.

“But Elise-chan I called Chuuya here today for an important job.”

“I don't care, I want to go with Chuuya now!” She declared.

“But-”

“Shut up Rintarou! I'm going with Chuuya,” She turned towards him pleading, “You'll take me won't you Chuuya?”

“Ummm” He looked at the boss, who seemed conflicted. Mori glanced at Elise from the corner of his eye. She stuck her tongue out at him. Eventually Mori sighed and reclined against his chair.

“I guess it can't be helped,” he said, “Please take care of her for the day Chuuya-kun.”

Chuuya sighed internally. “As you wish,” he answered, bowing down.

“Yay!!” Elise cheered, running up to his side, “Let's go” she demanded, grabbing his coat and pulling him towards the doors.

___________

The sky was clear, a gentle breeze swaying through Yokohama city. Well, at least it was a nice day out, Chuuya thought to himself. Elise was skipping beside him, arms swinging and humming a melody to herself.

They were walking towards the shop Elise wanted to try out when they saw a huge crowd in the way. Chuuya paused. Even though he had forgone his hat and cloak, he could still be recognized. If an enemy identified them there'd be trouble. He turned towards Elise.

“Alright stay close, let's be careful just in case.”

Elise simply held her hand out to him.

“What?” he said

She rolled her eyes, “Hold my hand, you're always supposed to hold hands when going through a crowd.”

He didn't know that. Damn it! He still had a lot to learn.

“Of course,” he said, taking her hand and pushing through the crowd. As he was walking he noticed two girls, hands clasped together and they made their way through. Chuuya had thought it was just for kids but apparently not. There were two other friends, one holding on to the sleeve of the other. It made sense to hold hands so they wouldn't lose each other. It was safer too.

He spent the entire day buying sweets for Elise. He could have sworn they went to every dessert store in the city. It ended up being a relaxing but tiring day for him. When he fell into his bed that evening he thought of all the people that he saw holding hands today. When he learned something new he always noticed it everywhere around him.

You're supposed to hold hands in crowded areas huh.

1. Your one and only

Chuuya wanted to go home.

He'd been gone for too long. He'd been sent abroad for a mission direct orders from the boss. He didn't think it would take that long but he'd been here for months. Waking up in France with a beautiful view outside his window was nice enough but he missed Yokohama. He missed Ane-san. Heck he even missed that shitty Dazai. And that was saying something. He couldn't stop the longing he felt increase with every passing day. He missed home.

He was looking forward to going back. Any day now, he'd get a call from the boss telling him to return. Suddenly someone slammed the door of his hotel room open. A subordinate stood there panting. “Chuuya-san! We've received orders to return to Yokohama immediately!”

Chuuya frowned, feeling uneasy. Why didn't the Boss or Ane-san call him? Immediately? Not that he wasn't happy to return; it just felt so sudden.

“Get the plane ready, we'll leave in 3 hours.”

“Yes sir” he bowed before running back out.

Chuuya sat back down on the chair and looked out the window. He'd better start packing. He couldn't shake the feeling of something wrong but at the same time he felt relieved. He was finally going back home.

___________

Chuuya landed in Yokohama at 1:45 A.M. He walked out of the airport slowly. He had been tense the whole flight. He took a deep breath. The air smelt like the sea and city dust. He allowed himself to relax a little.

He started thinking about what he'd want to do first. He could sleep for 2 days straight. Except he wouldn't even get 8 hours of rest before Dazai would barge into his apartment to raid his fridge and start whining about how annoying Akutagawa is. He snorted at the thought. Even after all his complaints and harsh words Chuuya knew he was fond of the kid. He frowned as his thoughts took a dark turn. What if that Bastard messed up his wine collection?!? Or put slime in all of his jacket pockets?! He shuddered, fearing for his wardrobe. He wanted to go to his apartment immediately.

His thoughts were interrupted by a beep and a buzzing sensation in his pocket. He pulled out his phone to see an incoming call from an unknown number. Weird. He answered the call, bringing it up to his ear.

“Hello?”

There was no answer. He could hear someone breathing on the other side. He waited.

“Oi,'' he tried again. Still nothing. Damn scam callers. Just as he was about to end the call he heard a faint whisper.

“Chuuya.”

Chuuya pressed the phone back to his ear recognizing the voice instantly, “Dazai? Why didn't you answer shithead?”

“Chuuya,” Dazai repeated softly. Why did he sound like that?

“Oi what's wrong?” Chuuya frowned. He was starting to get worried. Dazai sounded so tired.

“Does Chuuya know you only have one partner for the rest of your life?” Dazai said suddenly.

What? Where did that come from? No whiny annoying greetings? No wailing about how he hoped the plane crashed on the way here? Did Dazai even know he was back? “What do you mean shitty Dazai?”

“Like Verlaine and Randou-san,” Dazai clarified, as if that made this bizarre conversation make any more sense, “Even after they betrayed each other and thought the other died, they still call themselves partners.”

That was true. Even now that Randou-san was gone, Aniki still always spoke so fondly about him. Chuuya saw the look on Verlaine's face when he talked about him, and he could see how miserably he missed his partner. And he had remembered the way Randou-san had fought valiantly against him. He knew they had something special between them. Something not even death could take away.

“Yeah so? What of it?”

“Chuuya will be mine forever right?”

Now Chuuya was really started to freak out. He tried to tell himself it meant nothing, and that this was just another one of Dazai's shenanigans.

“What did I do to deserve such a shitty partner for life?” he sighed teasingly.

He heard Dazai suck in a breath as if he'd taken a punch to the gut. Then he heard a small laugh alongside, “Too bad, Chuuya's stuck with me forever.”

“Curse my luck,” he clicked his tongue, but the worry was starting to build up and he started flexing his hands in his gloves trying to calm down. Before he could ask what the fuck was going on Dazai's voice crackled through the phone.

“Goodbye Chuuya.” Dazai breathed.

Goodbye? Why did Dazai sound like he was dying? Why wasn't anyone telling Chuuya anything?!?

“Wait-”

The phone started beeping signaling the call had ended. Chuuya felt frustration take a hold of him. He smashed the buttons of his phone calling back on the number.

“The number you have dialed does not exist please try again later.” the machine replied automatically.

“Fuck!” Chuuya was about to try again when he received a message that made the blood freeze in his veins.

Dazai Osamu has turned traitor to the Port Mafia

He shook his head. No it couldn't be. He was just talking with the bastard for heaven's sake! He needed answers. He left his luggage right there as he activated his ability and shot towards Port Mafia Headquarters in a blur of black and red. He landed with a crash outside within seconds. A few guards stationed outside jumped before they recognized him and opened the doors.

Chuuya took the elevator up to the top floor. He didn't knock. He slammed the doors open and entered to the sight of Mori and Kouyou conversing quietly.

“What the hell is going on?” he asked as calmly as he could.

Kouyou replied, “Dazai has been missing for 2 weeks. We've ascertained that he has betrayed the Port Mafia.”

“Dazai?” Chuuya raised a brow. “Dazai Osamu youngest Port Mafia executive? That's hilarious.”

Kouyou shook her head, “It's true.”

Mori turned his eerie gaze towards him, “Chuuya-kun you know Dazai-kun best, you are his partner after all, do you have any idea where he could be hiding?”

Chuuya thought of the stupid suicidal bastard. Idiot enough to betray the Port Mafia. Yes he knew where he was. Chuuya always did. Like the Boss said, he was his partner.

“Chuuya will be mine forever right?” Stupid fucking asshole. Chuuya would kill him the next time he saw him.

“No Boss,” he replied. Then laughed “So that bastard left huh? Good riddance.” he turned to leave. “If you'll excuse me boss I'm a little tired from running here like a dog and I left my stuff at the airport, I'd like to go home with your permission.”

“Of course, of course take the day off tomorrow too, oh and Chuuya-kun?”

He looked back, “Yes?”

“Kouyou here tried to call you as soon as you landed but your number was busy.” Mori said accusingly, gaze so sharp Chuuya felt it could cut him.

“Scam.” Chuuya said without a thought. Mori looked like he didn't believe him. Chuuya held his gaze.

“Alright, you're free to go,” Mori said, still staring at Chuuya as if he could taste the lie.

He bent his head respectfully, leaving the room.

___________

Chuuya reached home at around 3 am, dropping his luggage on the floor and face planting on the couch. He was exhausted, yet he couldn't bring himself to sleep. He sighed, getting up and grabbing his keys as he left the building, heading towards the parking lot. His mind was reeling with a million questions. Why did Dazai leave? Exactly what had happened while Chuuya was gone? A late drive would calm him down.

Chuuya hit the unlock button on his key when his car exploded with a flash and an ear cracking boom, the force making his body fly backwards. He immediately used his ability to land safely, but let himself fall down as soon as his feet hit the ground.

Fuck it he should've stayed in France.

+1

Atsushi sat in his chair patiently waiting for the Port Mafia representative to show up. After fighting together to save Yokohama for years, the relationship between the Port Mafia and the Agency were never better. What had started with a simple truce had turned into a trusting partnership with members often coming together for joint missions. He didn't know who was coming in today. He hoped it wasn't Akutagawa.

Someone knocked on the door and Atsushi jumped up, opening the door at once. Chuuya was standing on the other side.

“Ah good morning Chuuya-san,” he said.

Chuuya lifted a brow, smirking he said, “You sound disappointed. Were you expecting someone else?”

“No!” Atsushi yelped, blushing. Really? Was it that obvious? “I wasn't expecting Akutagawa!” Atsushi defended himself.

“I never said who.”

“Oh.” Atsushi wanted to crawl into a hole.

Chuuya chuckled, “Don't worry kid, I think he wanted to be here too. He told me to say hi or I think it went something like “I'll kill you next time fool” I can't be too sure.”

“Chuuya!” Dazai yelled excitedly from somewhere behind him.

Atsushi saw Chuuya’s face turn to a look of disgust faster than anything. It was incredible really. Dazai pulled up to his side smiling mischievously.

“Why hello there chibi I almost didn't see you,” Oh dear, here we go again. “Say, did the slug get smaller?” Dazai cooed sweetly.

A vein twitched on Chuuya's forehead.

“I'm not in the mood for your games today asshole.” Chuuya sneered, shoving past him to hand some papers to Kunikida, nodding in greeting.

Dazai pouted, “Chibi is no fun.”

Atsushi shook his head fondly, silently glad that Chuuya-san decided to act like the bigger person today and not smash a chair over Dazai-san's head. That would've disturbed Kyouka-chan. Atsushi frowned, eyes going to where she was resting on the couch. She had come in with him today despite feeling sluggish. Atsushi felt ashamed for not having realized she was sick. Yosano had given her a pill and banned her to the couch. Chuuya seemed to have noticed her there as he walked towards her.

“What’s wrong Kyouka-chan?” he inquired, gently patting her head.

Kyouka slowly opened her eyes, “Chuuya-nii?” she mumbled.

“She's sick,” Dazai answered for her, walking towards them, “Little Kyouka-chan doesn't know when to rest hmm? Just like a certain chibi.”

“Fuck off,” Chuuya muttered and then bent down, softly pushing her bangs out of the way and pressing his mouth to her forehead. Atsushi's jaw dropped while Kyouka just leaned forward, completely unaffected.

He couldn't help himself, “Chuuya-san! what are you doing??” he whisper screamed.

Chuuya looked at him unimpressed, “Checking her for a fever obviously,” he deadpanned “She's alright thankfully.”

“That's right Atsushi-kun don't you know that's the best way to check?” Dazai-san added, smiling impishly.

It's really not. Atsushi wanted to counter but when he saw the devilish sparkle in Dazai-san’s eyes, he told himself not to question it.

Chuuya gave Kyouka a brotherly headbutt before walking towards Atsushi. “Guess it's just you and me then huh.” he said.

Right. Since Atsushi and Kyouka were the ones assigned to the mission today. It would be Atsushi's first time on a mission alone with Chuuya. He was kind of nervous. Dazai-san, perceptive as ever, noticed this.

“I can come along,” Dazai offered cheerfully.

“Absolutely the fuck not,” Chuuya replied with zero hesitation, “The kid and I can handle it we don't need your useless ass getting in the way.”

“But Kyouka-chan was supposed to go with you, it's a three person mission!” Dazai whined.

“Combat abilities are required and you're a weak piece of shit,” Chuuya stated mercilessly “Face it mackerel we're better off without you.”

“Not true and you know it, my strategies will make it easier to finish the job.”

Chuuya couldn't argue with that. He settled for glaring at him instead. Atsushi watched Dazai stare Chuuya down with a smug smirk. Atsushi knew that they were known as the most fearsome duo in all of Japan. He could imagine Akutagawa ranting about how lucky he was to go on a mission with The Double Black.

Chuuya sighed. He looked like he was about to give in when Kenji walked in the room.

“Oh hello Chuuya-san!”

At the sound of Kenji's voice, Chuuya visibly brightened up, turning away from Dazai.

“Hey kid.” he smiled going over to greet Kenji. The mafioso clearly had a favorite here at the agency. Well, Kenji was everyone's favorite.

“What were you guys talking about?” Kenji asked.

Chuuya sighed, pointing towards Dazai “This idiot wants to go with us on the mission instead of Kyouka-chan.”

“Chibi is the idiot,” Dazai sniffed.

“Ah that mission” Kenji nodded.

Recently a group of strong ability users started terrorizing Yokohama. Atsushi thought it was a dumb move since the city was under both the Port Mafia and the Armed Detective Agency's protection. No one stood a chance. Yet they were doing some significant damage and were able to take down some of the Mafia members. Hence, the decision to send the higher ups on a joint mission.

“I think it's alright since Kyouka-chan was supposed to go with you guys,” Kenji piped up, “Besides Dazai-san is actually super smart so he'll be helpful!”

“How right you are Kenji-kun!” Dazai beamed shoving Chuuya aside to pat him on the head, “Finally someone who appreciates me.” Dazai shook his head in mock despair.

“Fucking fine whatever lets go,” Chuuya said, sending a glare in Dazai's direction, “And if you get it the way I'm gonna kill you.”

“Please,” Dazai scoffed, “It's going to be a piece of cake.”

___________

It was a disaster.

“I'm going to fucking kill you.” Chuuya hissed, while pressing down on the gaping wound on Dazai's stomach.

Meanwhile, Atsushi was trying not to have a panic attack. Dazai-san had taken a bad hit. He takes it back. These people were not foolish. They were insanely strong. A dozen ability users, two of them with long range attacks through inanimate objects somewhat like Chuuya's ability, and Dazai was unable to nullify the attack. A huge shard of metal struck him straight in the gut while Chuuya had been too busy guarding their backs. Atsushi hated himself at that moment. He should've been fast enough to stop it. He should've protected Dazai. All that training just for-

Dazai let out a small giggle, making Atsushi's mind go blank.

“Are you fucking laughing right now?” Chuuya asked furiously, “Is this fucking funny?”

“It's kind of funny,” Dazai coughed wetly, blood spilling from his lips. A series of gunshots started hitting the pillar they had taken cover behind. Chuuya let out a string of curse words.

“Chuuya I have to tell you something before I die.” Dazai wheezed out.

“Shut the fuck up.” Chuuya replied with a voice as calm as a raging storm.

“Don't die Dazai-san!” Atsushi cried. He was so close to bawling. He couldn't fathom Dazai-san just dying like this.

“He's not dying you idiot,” Chuuya slapped the back of his head.

“Don't be mean to Atsushi-kun!” Dazai coughed out with another spurt of blood.

“I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP.”

Atsushi started feeling hysterical. What the fuck was going on here.

“Kid!” Chuuya yelled, pulling Atsushi out of his mind, tugging him with one hand with the rest of his body still protectively curled over Dazai, “Fucking focus!”

“I'm sor-”

“Fuck that, hold on to this waste of bandages,” Chuuya cut off with a curse as another bang sounded behind them, shaking the ground, “I'm going to kill every single one of those fuckers.” Chuuya whispered darkly.

Dazai let out another wheeze. It sounded a lot like the word “hot” but Atsushi is going to ignore that.

Chuuya cradled Dazai in his arms before passing him to Atsushi, “Hurts,” Dazai let out in a small voice.

For a second Chuuya's eyes softened and his face turned so loving Atsushi wanted to close his eyes. Then Chuuya bent down close to Dazai's face, rubbing their foreheads together before whispering, ever so sweetly, “If you die, I'm going to gut you like a fish.” Then he let go of Dazai and stepped out behind the pillar, glowing red with his ability.

Atsushi broke out in cold sweat as he heard bones crunching, and violent screams coming from the enemies that got to experience the rage of Nakahara Chuuya.

Dazai sighed lovingly in Atsushi's arms.

Atsushi never wanted to work with them again.

___________

The next day, Atsushi was back at the Agency glad that the fiasco was over. It turns out they didn't really need Atsushi or Dazai. They didn't need anyone actually. Chuuya was enough to absolutely demolish any enemy that dared to threaten the peace in Yokohama.

He walked towards Yosano’s office, wanting to check in on Dazai. He had taken a fatal blow but thanks to Chuuya completely obliterating the enemy in seconds, they'd made it safely back in time for Dazai to get treated. As he got closer to the door he heard yelling. Oh right. Chuuya had not left Dazai's side since then. It was the next day though. Does that mean he'd slept over? Atsushi once again decided not to think about this. He knocked on the door twice before stepping in.

“Umm,” Atsushi tried, “I brought some medicine.”

“Ouch! Ouch! Chuuya it hurts!!”

“It wouldn't hurt if you stopped trying to move you stupid shit!”

“Chuuya's being mean!”

“Chuuya will fucking kill you if you don't shut up and lay back down!”

Dazai pouted. Watering his eyes and batting his impossibly long lashes, he turned his big doe eyes towards Chuuya, making that dreaded, kicked puppy face.

“Chuu it hurts a lot.” Dazai whimpered, “Kiss it better?”

Atsushi winced waiting for the inevitable outcry of “Shut the fuck up that's fucking disgusting!” coupled with a slap that would surely end Dazai-san's life for good this time but what happened next was something he could'nt have conjured up even in his most wildest dreams.

Chuuya sighed, exasperated. “Fucking baby,” he mumbled.

And then, he tucked Dazai's hair behind one ear, pressed his gloved hand to his cheek and pulled him forward so lovingly Atsushi's eyes hurt from watching. He tried to look away, but stood there frozen as Chuuya kissed Dazai's cheek, staying against it for a few seconds with his eyes closed and then nuzzling against his face before pulling away.

“There are you fucking happy?”

The sound of glass shattering made Chuuya and Dazai whip their heads to see Atsushi standing at the door with his mouth agape and the medicine bottle cracked into splinters on the floor.

Atsushi met his mentor's eyes only to have his mind completely blue screen at the flushed and giddy look on his face. He'd never seen Dazai look so, well, alive before. They stared at each other before Chuuya broke the silence.

“What the fuck kid, you wasted the medicine!”

“You!” Atsushi couldn't ignore this any longer, “You- You just kissed Dazai-san!”

Chuuya looked annoyed, “He was in pain, dumbass.”

“SO YOU KISSED HIM?!?!”

“What the fuck are you so spooked about?” Chuuya said, raising his brows.

“THAT'S NOT NORMAL!”

“Yes it is.” Dazai interrupted, "Atsushi-kun don't you know you're supposed to kiss wounds better?”

“HE DIDN'T EVEN KISS THE WOUND?!?!”

“Shut up both of you.” Chuuya snapped.

“Are you guys dating?!?!” Atsushi screamed.

“NO” they both yelled in unison.

Atsushi eyed them suspiciously. Yeah there was definitely something going on. He watched Dazai pull on a long strand of Chuuya's hair to bring his attention back to himself. Chuuya slapped it away. Dazai pouted and held his hand to his chest mournfully. Chuuya grabbed said hand and kissed the back of it. Rubbing the red stinging mark he'd inflicted himself with his thumb. Dazai giggled.

On second thought, he didn't want anything to do with this.

“Okay uh.. I'll take my leave then! Goodbye Dazai-san, get well soon!” Atsushi rushed out before running out the room and slamming the door shut.

Dazai hummed amusingly. He moved his hand to slip his ring finger inside Chuuya's glove.

“Chuuya, we've been partners for 7 years and you know what they say after having spent so much time together you have to get married.”

“Oh really?”

“Yes, it's only natural.”

Chuuya looked at him, unimpressed. “You really think I'm that gullible, you stupid mackerel?”

“You have no idea,” Dazai muttered under his breath.

“What was that?”

“Nothing!”

Chuuya sighed dramatically, shaking his head. Seriously, with the way the chibi acted you would think he was 80 years old. Dazai started thinking of other ways he could convince Chuuya to be his dog forever. If he could trick him into signing those marriage papers nothing could come between them! Maybe he should just forge Chuuya's signature…

“Stop thinking of stupid shit!” Chuuya slapped the back of his head.

“Chuuya doesn't know me well at all, I was thinking of something very serious!”

“No you weren't, that's not your serious thinking face,” Chuuya stated plainly, as if it didn't just make Dazai's heart skip a beat. How dare Chuuya say the most romantic things so nonchalantly! Dazai wanted to swoon. Gross.

“Chibikkooooo, you have to!” he whined.

Chuuya let out an annoyed breath, and Dazai knew he'd won, “Fine, you stupid waste of bandages, I suppose if we have to.”

Dazai internally cheered. Outwardly, he put the papers in front of Chuuya. “Sign here.”

“WHY THE FUCK DO YOU HAVE THESE?”

“Stupid chibi, I'm always prepared.”

Chuuya looked at him. The man who destroys his apartment for shits and giggles, makes fun of his hats, hates dogs (seriously, what a monster) and makes his life actual hell. The same man who saved him from the sheep when they turned against him, and gave him a home when he had nowhere else to go. Who acts like he's heartless but cares so much more than anyone could imagine. Someone who's so smart yet dumb enough to think Chuuya actually falls for his stupid lies. The ridiculous man who just pulled marriage papers out of his ass the second his proposal was a success.

Chuuya had half a mind to tell the mackerel he wasn't 15 anymore, that he knew what he was up to but one look at those stupid, big, beautiful brown eyes, sparkling with joy at having thought he tricked him, he decided to play along. Oh how he'd burn the world for this idiot.

And so, Chuuya signs the papers. And wears a ring under his gloves where no one can see it. And lets a mackerel live in his house and dump his precious wine down the sink. He really is the most gullible person on earth.

[luminouslywriting]

Hi, I'm here to make a request, first of all I AM OBSESSED WITH RONALD SPEIRS!!, so I was wondering if you could make some headcanons about what it would be like to marry him, basically what the wedding day would be like and everything it would include, (please Let it be a big wedding...I think I have a problem with exorbitant celebrations 😭😭)

You could also add about what role each Easy boy would take at the wedding and everything. Also that the reader there was part of the company

^^Gif not mine^^

A/N: Love, this is a wonderful request and I'm so sorry that it's taken so long for me to get to it. I'm sick so I'm taking my sick day to respond to a few of my requests haha!

Cut for length, paragraph form, more below the cut, some light spice included:

-Ronald Speirs and a wedding is a surprising match made in heaven and you can't convince me otherwise. He's happy to go to a courthouse and elope if that's what you want. But if you want the whole white wedding in full tradition? He's also happy to oblige such a request. I think that in general, he's the type to let you plan to your heart's content, but if you want him to be involved, he will in fact, have an opinion about the color of napkins and the amount of flowers haha.

-If you're stressed out in the days leading up to the wedding, rest assured that this man is a GREAT stress reliever. He knows exactly how to get your mind off of things—and if those wicked ways happen to include his fingers or his mouth, then he's all too happy about it anyway.

-Knowing the fact that you want the full traditional wedding means that he is going to need some groomsmen and there's no way that he wouldn't invite the men of Easy Company to the wedding

-That being said, the invitations were out well in advance and while everyone was pleasantly surprised to be invited to said wedding, they're also very jazzed about the entire thing

-Lipton is obviously his best man

-Everyone else had to be fought over in a wild game of rock paper scissors to decide who ends up on what side of the wedding party

-Other groomsmen for him include Dick Winters, Babe Heffron, Perconte, Martin, Donald Malarkey, David Webster, and Joe Toye.

-Your side of the wedding party got Lewis Nixon, Bull Randleman, Joe Liebgott, Buck Compton, Eugene Roe, Floyd Talbert, Shifty, and Bill Guarnere.

-Put Nixon in charge of the bar for the reception, I beg of you

-Winters had a lot of fun getting to plan so much and being involved in everything

-The others were a little chaotic, to say the least

-The rings were held onto by Lipton

-Anywho, the wedding goes off without a single hitch (mostly because poor Dick Winters and Carwood Lipton are working overtime behind the scenes to ensure that it's the best and most smooth operation to date)

-The vows definitely make a few people shed tears (and yes, Speirs is all too pleased by that)

-The reception would last for hours and hours, well into the night

-And when the two of you slip away while everyone is drinking so you can leave to the honeymoon and the only two people you get to say goodbye to are Winters and Lipton, neither one of you truly mind haha

-10/10 would have these men assemble a wedding

[lalalian]

dragon riding equipment | aethergarde academy dr

date: november 23, 2024

it's been a sec since i've done a longer post (like a little over a week or smth.. right?)

I was busy with my finals... I still am, but like... I miss posting 😭😭

Equipment will be outlined in aethergarde's student handbook too!

ANYWAY-- enjoy this incredibly long post! I'm sorry if there are any typos, I don't feel like looking over everything (T-T)

how to get your equipment (kinda)

It's pretty easy to find shops that sell dragon riding equipment in cities-- but in rural towns and villages, this kind of equipment can be almost impossible to find near you.

If you are not starting off as a noble like me, buy your equipment within the first week of school-- actually, no, get it ASAP. You should, ideally, start looking for equipment after you retrieve your egg (you need to get your egg as soon as you get to campus).

What if you don't have the equipment by the time you need to start using it? You'll be left out of lessons, standing off to the side while your peers fight or fly, which will absolutely tank your grades.

You should have your equipment before the first month of school ends.

If I have a month to get said equipment, why not wait?

There are lots of dragon riding equipment shops, but not all of them are of good quality. Roughly half of the students attending Aethergarde will not be nobles, on top of that, nobles will commission the best shops-- especially luxury brand shops-- to custom make their armory, saddles, etc.

This makes the dragon equipment market rather busy around this time of year.

BUT

I'll help ya'll out, though, I can't promise you'll be the only commissioning things from these places.

school supplies list

let's start with the obvious, you'll need either an enchanted fountain pen, a regular fountain pen + ink, or some quills and ink. Quills and ink are cheaper, they're the equivalent to like, wooden pencils. Fountain pens have the same reputation as mechanical pencils. Enchanted fountain pens are really trendy! Definitely also get a set of gum wax, aka waxers (erasers); kids like to call them gummies (fruit gummy resembling snacks are called jellies here!)

You should get basic stuff like loose parchment (loose leaf paper), an academy bag (a backpack, highly recommend a messenger type bag), and writing books (notebooks to take notes in)

dragon mounting gear: includes such things like a saddle and reins, very similar to horse gear

wind-breaking charm OR riding goggles OR a riding visor: Wind-breaking charms are pretty hard to find-- I mean it's not impossible, but it's just not cheap. Riding goggles are an old rider thing, they aren't used much anymore. Riding goggles look like your typical steampunk-esque goggles. If you want a physical facial wind breaker, get a riding visor. Riding visors look similar to ski visors, but the glass lookin part tends to be tinted orange due to a strong sunglasses effect.

kinda like this ^^^^ but w/o the gas mask; if anyone's got a better idea for this btw, plz let me know!

I'm still in the works with this aspect.. mostly bc I feel like the visors don't fit the fantastical aesthetic-- but I didn't want to immediately default to using magic and charms because I want the rider uniforms to be more unique than the typical 'fighting leathers', yk? Idk, maybe the décolletage cover is unique enough.

Other sight wind-breaking options:

wind-protectant eyedrops: these are rather new (has been released to the market a year before you shift here) the liquid is runny like normal eyedrops when you put them in your eyes, but the substance begins to form a film over your eyes. The film feels exactly like contacts, so it's easy to forget the substance is still on your eye. The film only lasts for a few hours (the film will eventually dissolve), and does not do any damage to the eye. To manually remove it, use the 'antidote' eye drops (wind protectant eyedrops and antidote eyedrops are sold in a set) to lubricate your eyes, then after blinking a few times, remove the film by softly pinching it out of the eye (NOT WITH UR NAILS, USE THE PADS OF YOUR FINGERTIPS!!!). The downside to these eyedrops is that they do not protect against the sun; though, sun-resistance eyedrops are starting to come to the market. You must make sure the sun eyedrops are wind-protectant friendly, or the sun eyedrops won't stick to the film, causing the sun eyedrops to leave your eyes too quickly. These eyedrops are also pretty expensive, but it's still less expensive than rider grade wind-breaker charms.

rider grade sun-resistance charm: A lot of people carry these around just in general, especially during summer, but the one's you should buy should be rider grade. Rider sun charms are stronger and are made to be used when you're flying in the sky for long periods of time. Sun charms need to be replaced every few months; all sun-resistance charms have to (legally) have a label that gradually changes to black-- the darker it is, the less it works. It typically starts to darken after two months of use.

moving on--

fighting attire: Unfortunately, it's not ideal to fight in aethergarde's uniform-- But, it's not like it's impossible if you take the outer coat off. Speaking of uniforms, Aethergarde provides a fighting garment set that comes with the formal uniform (the pretty one). You're required to wear it for fighting lessons, including outside missions; in your third, fourth, and fifth years, you can start replacing elements of your uniform with better material. Why not simply allow students to get their own fighting garments from the start? Students need to know how to fight wearing armor made for higher ranking riders-- the material is different from lower ranking riders' uniform.

you'd be wearing smth like this but w/o all the stringy bits! consists of a lot of wild dragon hide.

a weapon: you'll need to have chosen a weapon before the end of the second month!

optional riding supplies

décolletage cover: Main purpose is to provide warmth for the face and neck area without compromising movement. It's highly recommended-- plus, you'll look cool. Many décolletage covers are charmed to always be warm and protect against harmful gases.

often looks like this but less kinky looking and the bottom part is fitted to the chest-- also not all of them have this same design, but they all do cover the same areas.

it'd fit like this ^^^^ to the body!

riding gloves: helps you have a better grip with weapons or to your saddle. If you're planning to sleep on your dragon while it flies, there's a little belt mechanism that you can loop through the front of the dragon saddle that attaches your hands to the saddle. This helps keep your body from sliding off the dragon during flight. If the front of your saddle isn't comfortable, you can loop the belt through any belt buckle on the dragon; the most common place is around the bottom of the dragon's neck (pictured in the 2nd pic). It's best to get black gloves, but brown can also work.

the highlighted yellow area is, relatively, where the most popular glove attachment is (for napping). There'd be more belts and stuff around the dragon btw, I just didn't feel like doing all that shit.

belt vial holder: you can place travel sized containers of potion bottles in the best + you can attach charms to the belt too

flight bag(s): This bag can be easily attached to your dragon's saddle, most saddles can hold up to 2-4 bags. Bags in general can be tailored to become flight bags, but it's best if the bag has some sort of tight buckle-- you don't want your bag to fall open when you're flying around!

these kinds of bags are common riding bag designs! if you have a smaller satchel you like bringing around, you can put it inside of one of these bags

how to get your equipment (actually) pt.2

Like I mentioned earlier, it's better to buy rider equipment in cities rather than villages and small towns. During rider season, it won't be uncommon to see a bunch of stalls along the streets selling rider stuff.

Getting stuff like academy bags, belt vial holders, and travel bottles from stalls isn't a bad idea, but it's always best to get your most important equipment from an expert with a good reputation.

Unless you know the crafter is great at making everything-- extremely durable saddles, reins, weapons, and fighting attire, you should go to shops that specialize in each part.

recommended shops:

Since common street shops will be busy this time of year, I'm going to recommend you some underground shops.

I cannot guarantee that these places will be completely empty, as they're all well-known in their own right, but they all will be able to cater to you before all of your deadlines.

Make sure you bring the actual school supplies list with you!

middle steed

Name: Aadam El-Hussein

Specialization: dragon saddles, belts, and flight bags

Summary: After his father's arthritis in the hands started becoming worse, Aadam took over Middle Stead. His dad still helps around at the tannery though! As with all the shopkeepers, Aadam and his father are extremely passionate about their jobs. Don't be afraid to ask for any innovative features; like if you think you'd sleep a lot on dragonback, you can ask Aadam to make the saddle more comfortable for you to lay in a certain position. If you're extremely worried about safety, you can always ask to have other safety features implemented in the design.

To get here:

Find the Dragonmead Brewery in Itresal (the city Aethergarde Academy is located in) the alehouse is located on Millmount Street.

There should be a space between that brewery and the bakery next to it-- go down that alleyway and pass two wooden doors. When you get to that third door, knock; either an old man (Aadam's dad) or Aadam himself will open the door

From there, you can order a saddle and all the appropriate equipment you need

Some tips:

Get another saddle commissioned by him every two years; dragons grow relatively fast, so simple tailoring won't always suffice

You can put off getting saddles until your dragon near rider flight age

Instead of bringing your dragon to Middle Stead, bring him into Aethergarde. He'll need measurements to make a proper saddle

Any metal (like in the buckles) should be plated with a matte coat or cold black iron

storm forage

Name: Reynard Ulysses

Specialization: Dragon rider armor and rider fighting attire

Summary: Reynard was born into a rural farmer family, but after his older brother ended up being a rider, Reynard moved to Itresal with his brother. Since Reynard was often tasked with preparing hide, he decided to work at a local butcher shop to help his brother financially. Oftentimes, his brother would come home and complain that he needed to replace his fighting garments. The two of them couldn't afford to keep buying cheap fighting attire, so Reynard started learning how to make it himself. Eventually, he started selling his products to other people-- over the years, he's honed his skills, and became known in underground spaces for having great fighting attire.

To get here:

Located in the southern part of Itresal in Ranger's Way

Go down the alleyway between Steel Whim (blacksmith) and the Loving Fowl Inn

Walk straight until you reach a fork; walk through the rightmost path, then go left at the end of the path

There should be a wooden sign that says Storm Forage on a door; knock on that door, you can order from there

Some tips:

You may see Callisto here

Everything you wear has to be matte; tell Reynard to plate any metal on your fighting attire with cold black iron

waning moon burrows (face wear)

Name: Yessuf Yohannes Tarik

Specialization: rider goggles, rider visors, cloaks, aerodynamic magitech

Summary: Yessuf is the only one out of all the merchants so far who was born of noble status; however, he left home to escape from the classic noble lifestyle in his early 20s. He no longer wants to be a noble, and simply identifies as a commoner. Yessuf was particularly driven to escape his luxurious life to pursue his passions and sell his products at a more reasonable price. Ever since he was young, he had a strong affinity for engineering, but when magitech came around, he took his passion to a whole different level. Though is not a dragon rider, he was always fascinated by dragons, this spurred him on to make technology that would aid riders. Yessuf is an innovative prodigy; Yessuf's shop is most likely to be busier than the all of the ones I've mentioned so far.

To get here:

Located in the central part of Itresal in Quarry Avenue

Find The Pioneer Brewery and ask for a "vermond tea served with a stick of sweetbark"

The bartender will ask you to come to the back to see the new selection of sweetbark; follow the bartender, they will take you to Waning Moon

Some tips:

Literally every single product this guy sells is amazing. Not a single one is bad, he puts in a lot of effort to make everything he sells as good as he can make it

Only sells wind-resistance charms on the weekend, but sells wind an sun-resistance eyedrops Monday, Wednesday, and Friday

His wind-sun resistance eyedrops and his wind-resistance charms sell really quick

if there's something you want that he doesn't actively sell, like, perhaps... a flying ship.. you can commission him to make one, but you will prob need to provide him with a lot of the materials

You should get wind-sun resistance charms here; they're cheaper because Yessuf does not base the price on existing market value

the dew drop: potion's shop

Name: Katherine Dowenstein (Blonde lady), Lorelai Dowenstein (Brown hair)

Specialization: Potions, tonics, elixirs, balms, herbs

Summary: Katherine Dowenstein grew up in an orphanage. Despite that, her life was rather peaceful growing up. Since she loved going outdoors, cooking, and baking, her caregivers often remarked that she'd be a great apocathary when she's older. Determined to meet their expectations, she began learning all about different plants and potions through both books and experience. When she was older, she decided to work in a potions' shop, but hated the restrictions placed on her. Kathie grew to hate her job, and her love for potions waned, but it wasn't until she healed a child who was thought to have an incurable disease secretly by giving the child tonics Kathie believed had a chance at helping her through her illness. That child was Lorelai; after she recovered, Lorelai begged to become Kathie's apprentice. By Kathie's request, Lorelai lied and told her parents and everyone else that her body simply fought the virus on its own. Kathie didn't want a lot of people knowing about her skills, as she didn't want to be confined by strict regulations any longer. Kathie started her own potion's shop; Lorelai helps her out.

To get here:

There's two different ways

One way is to find Lorelai; she frequents a bread shop called Crumb Hours at 8AM-10AM to read a book and eat before she goes to work (Mon-Fri)

Ask her if she's reading Time of Barbury by Guinevere Roth; she'll say yes, and she'll ask you to join her on her walk back to The Dew Drop at 10AM

Another way is to find the way to the shop yourself

To do this, go to the same bakery that Lorelai likes to go to, Crumb Hours, and go down the alleyway located between the bakery and Utred's Lenses

Go straight down until you reach the area where the path deviates; go left, continue down the path until you come across a fork

Go down the middle path; then knock on a door labelled The Dew Drop

Notice that the area is not the shop is not selling any potions-- only herbs

Lorelai will answer; tell her if she's selling the book Time of Barbury

She'll nod, and she'll take you down a trapdoor, which you lead you to the actual store

Once you see Kathie, you know you're in the right place

Some tips:

Katherine prefers to go by Kathie!

Ok so do note that the regulations placed on potions and tonics are there to (obviously) make sure that potions and stuff are safe to consume, but since it's so strict, it's hard to be innovative, and use different kinds of ingredients and recipes to make potions

"but what about weapons?"

You'll need to go to a shop that specifically caters to your weapon type; if the store sells weapons that aren't closely related to each other (like swords, bows, and scythes), it's unlikely that to shop is of the best quality. if a shop sells only daggers and swords, that means that the people making the equipment are actually specialized in making those weapons. Since there are so many weapon types, I don't think I can make shopkeepers for each!

[shit-solkat]

How I personally see x-shippers in the Homestuck Fandom

Based on my perceptions, based on my opinions, based on my expiriences! :] Nothing directed to anyone in particular.

If you have x-ship as your OTP, this is how I see your "category" VERY generally, let's say.

Johnkat / Communism shippers

I don't even ship Johnkat, but y'all are the sweetest people out there?? The chillest people ever. Like, if they asked me with what shipper I would spend ten hours trip with, it'd be a Johnkat shipper.

Davejade / Spacetime shippers

LITERALLY the same as Johnkat, but y'all are also so fucking talented too?? Any art skill possible (traditional, digital, animation, 3D, paper puppet, etc) Y'ALL CAN DO THAT!!! How do y'all even exist!? 😭

(Btw, yes, you're chill too, but a lil less than Johnkat shippers)

Dirkjake / Pumpkin shippers

Annoying.

You're annoying.

There are two types of Pumpkin shippers though.

Type 1: less annoying. You like toxic yaoi, you recognize they're in a toxic relationship and I can respect you.

Type 2: "toxic yaoiiii 🤪🤪🤪" but when someone points out the actual toxicity of Dirkjake those shippers will come after their ass.

Rosekan / Rosemary shippers

Hard to find people who have Rosemary as primary ship, since they're established in canon, so people ship them in the background because it makes sense and they're actually a thing.

BUT I am convinced the primary Rosemary shippers aren't rare at all, I think they simply don't use socials as much as other HS fans. So they're normal, basically.

Solkat / MUTANT2 shippers

I won't count myself because 1- I'm not so pretentious, 2- I don't think I act like the average MUTANT2 shipper AT ALL!!!

The average: Some Dude™. Yes, even the girls act like Some Dude™.

Weirdly, most of them don't know Fandom culture that well. Maybe cuz they're all Some Dudes™.

Erifef / Make a wwis)( shippers

They do not deny what happened in the comic, they just ignore it. And somehow they are able to ignore it even when someone points out what happens in the comic.

"But Eridan killed Feferi." "Ok *not listening*"

Y'all are in a constant Zen State after years of meditation and acception, probably.

Nepfef / Octopussy shippers

"FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF NOTHING BAD HAPPENED FLUFF FLUFF FUNNY 2000 MEME FLUFF"

"But Nepeta and Feferi died-"

"FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF FUNNY CAT RAINBOW VIDEO AH AH PUSSY FISH FLUFF FLUFF FLUFF"

Davekat shippers

No.

Go read the comic.

Karezi / Adorabloodthirsty(?) shippers

Y'all died??? I SUPPOSE you all were too annoyed with canon and Hussie to actually care to continue reading, or stay in the Fandom. Or I can't explain how y'all literally imploded and disappeared.

Daverose / Dersecest shippers

Same as Karezi, but I can see you every now and then reblog stuff, mostly due archive reasons.

Johnvris / Spider8reath shippers

Their personality is a mix between John and Vriska's. That's the only way I can explain it.

Equinep / Meowrails shippers

Same as Rosemary for the first part, but there are more people loving Meowrails as their OTP. And those fans usually are the sweet & respectful memes side. Their pages often feel like an Internet Checkpoint where to rest and see cute and mindlessly funny stuff for a moment.

Please, never leave the Fandom.

Some of y'all are dumb af tho.

Vrisrezi / Scourge sisters shippers

The ship isn't bad and it makes sense even, the shippers, on the other hand, have to chill the fuck out and actually read the comic and not only the second part of Act 6 or, worse, from the Epilogues and on.

Katnep / Katnip shippers

You all just wish the best for Nepeta. That's like your whole personality in the Fandom. Nepeta deserved a better treatment. The end.

Vrisfef / Spider8each shippers

Never met a Spider8each shipper who isn't obsessed with Spider8each like I'm obsessed with MUTANT2. You make EVERYTHING about them; every and all quadrants; every and all situations. You WILL scream "THEM!!!"

Any Dancestor x Dancestor shipper

You care too much about the Dancestors, but your real problem is that you're annoying. And probably also 15 too.

Any Ancestor x Ancestor shipper

You're a rare breed. A really special and important one. I love you. You're my parent now.

Summonfang / Summoning the 8ooty shippers

What I've said before, except that you're actually not my parent, but my annoying little cousin.

Spades Slick x Karkat / Bloodsworn shippers

I love you. If you exist (I've seen only a couple of people), just know that you're right, always, you're cooking, keep going, I love you. Also you make the sexiest scenarios.

Davejohn / Pepsicola shippers

Most normal people in the world. Not in the "chill person" way like Communism shippers or "Some Dude" way like MUTANT2 shippers.

You're normal. Average even. You could be called "annoying" at times, for making jokes like "red and blue = pepsicola ah ah", but it's just a joke you make sometimes, in the most normal way. You're normal. You're ok.

Beta OT4 shippers

I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EDIT: I apologize to DirkJake shippers. DaveShitKat shippers are definitely far far far far far far far far far far far more annoying.

[ugotcooneycrossed]

Anyway could you do 26 with viccy please and thank youuu xxx

a/n: anything for you mrs pelova😌 and sorry this took so long 😭, i kinda changed it up so i hope you dont mind

Tracing invisible shapes on your lover's skin as they're busy doing something stressful, keeping their attention half on what they're doing, and half on you.

you're swamped with work- like, you feel like you've finally gone mad with the amount of papers surrounding the desk youre sat at- your laptop hot from being on all day, running close to fifty tabs, spotify, and a youtube video on what to do if you fail your uni course- all in preparation of course.

you crack your neck and breathe deeply- trying not to stress yourself sick.

viccy pops her head into the room and frowns.

"youre still here? it's been hours."

"i need to study vic- i can't fail this."

"you still have a couple days babe- just come rest with me."

"i cant viccy- i need-"

"you need to come and rest with me- at least come study on the couch, i know your back hurts."

"i- fine."

she cheers and wrap her arms around you- picking you and walking to the other room, throwing you on the couch.

"finally- my pillows here."

"wow- so you only wanted me here to be your pillow? rude viccy, so, so rude."

-

you sit back into the couch- laptop resting on your lap and viccy cuddled in next to you. your free hand starts to play with her hair, while your other continues to type.

you start to loose your attention on your work- focused instead on her. shes fallen asleep against you- half slumped on top of you- her face smashed against your keyboard. your eyes continue to trace the features on her face though and your other hand moves to trace shapes on her back. your work long forgotten.

[shaunamilfman]

i wanna request some headcanons but i cant think of anything except how jackie would act during your birthday😭

How Jackie acts on your birthday.

pre-crash headcanons

Jackie definitely makes you drive her to the mall or some shit and makes you wait in the cafeteria while she buys all your presents. When you get to her house you gotta wait in the car with your eyes closed until she hides them inside.

Jackie's the type to tease you for the entire week leading up to your birthday all “i could have sworn something was coming up 🤔” / “it's my birthday.” /”Nooooo. That couldn't be it.���

She wakes you up at like 7 AM by jumping on top of you and pressing kisses all over your face until you wake up. she tried to make you breakfast but got so excited that she burnt it a bit but you just hide your grimace as you eat it anyway. the juice she poured was the only edible part really. 

Jackie's favorite part is watching you open the presents she got you. You will have to comment on how pretty the wrapping paper is because she definitely picked it out specially for you and would be disappointed if you didn't notice. 

Jackie's just as excited to let you unwrap your next present (it's her. congrats) 

she wears whatever your favorite outfit of hers is, but she always pretends it's an accident. “oh do you like this outfit?” while twirling her hair around her finger. she's so flirty the entire day she's always in such a good mood. she's almost more excited about your birthday than you are. 

Jackie Taylor goes all out for your birthday. She definitely throws you a “surprise” party but she's so excited about it that she spoils it on accident long before the party. She's so suspicious when she's asking you if you have any plans or something. you mention maybe wanting to go catch a movie with her or something and she's like “No! I mean uh, don't you want to come over instead?” she's so awful at lying that it becomes sooo obvious, but Jackie's so sure you don't know. she's so proud of herself because of it lmao.

You hear her planning last minute details on the phone the morning of and she sees you and just slams the phone down. You're like “What are you doing Jackie?” and her ass panics and makes up the worst fucking excuse you've ever heard. if you didn't know about the party you'd think she was cheating on you. she gets you all dressed up to go hang out at her house and giggles every time she says it

You have to fake being surprised when you get there or Jackie will spend the whole night pouting. everyone jumps out yelling “surprise!” but they're so lackluster because you so obviously know by now. everyone knows Jackie can't keep a happy secret for shit.

Jackie will not leave your side the entire night. she's more sweet and loving than usual. she really goes out of her way to make your birthday super special. 

[mini-jiminie]

many thanks to the chokehold that polaroids had on park jimin :)

When we talk about photography and who is the photographer of the group, our minds immediately hone in on jk because ofc, we have to put some respect on the founder of gcf's name.

Before gcf though, there was #슈가의_시선 (Suga's sight). This is a link to some of the photos that Yoongi used to post on twitter under the hashtag.

However, there's one person who simply doesn't get enough credit for his prowess with a camera.

^^ all those polaroids being from his personal collection

From 2017-18, jimin was a polaroid pictures connoisseur. Tears are being shed as I type this out but, when jm used to be really active on social media (😭) he'd bless us with the occasional photo dump here and there.

Speaking of, let's zoom in on that photo sitting right off-centre in that last little photo dump!

I wish I was joking when I say that this photo changed the trajectory of my life forever.

No, cause whose parents are these?? Who are these 90s high school sweethearts?

(they're actually my parents uwu)

Anyways. I've duped you all and this whole post thus far has just been a way for me to segway into something else I'd like to discuss:

Run BTS ep. 52 - BTS ESCAPE (aka. chaos ensues when you stick the tannies into an escape room)

Yes, the revolutionary polaroid was taken during the filming of this episode. This episode also shed some light onto the scam artist that is Jeon Jungkook.

So, the episode starts with seokjin and jimin being named team leaders (because they had prior experience doing escape rooms).

Both would randomly pick an escape room theme for their respective teams:

Jm picks 'Korean dry sauna'.

Someone makes his stance on jm's selection pretty clear from the get go:

(keep this in mind cause we're about to discuss the clownery that goes down later)

So they pick their teams and lo and behold, Mr 'I hate dry saunas' ends up in team 'Korean dry sauna'.

The question is, does jk think this is all an unfortunate turn of fate? Or, is jk fate himself?🤨

While everyone is just holding their sheets of paper, jk is attempting to camouflage with the wall while he subtly sneaks a peak.

It's almost as if the gags write themselves cause even glimpsing at 1/4 of the paper would've allowed them to see the name of the team (jungkook honey plssss)

Then #dry_sauna_hater, knowing he doesn't have the 'dry sauna' theme card, swaps with Tae.

#that moment when you get the escape room theme you didn't want #cause you cheated your way into getting it

Result of said cheating though: 🥰

This isn't even the first instance of jk trying to will a team with jm into existence

here he is not letting Mini Moni breathe

.....again:

them leaving out tae even when white makes up majority of the flag😭

here he is being the great wall of jungkook:

the foreshadowing by focusing on him during this scene😭

rlly left jm #bamboozled

Jungkook, I get you though. I rlly do.

anyways, im ending this post with my most favourite picture ever! bye!