#like the one to jump off any high ledge 😭

[llycaons]

self-harm/gore imagery ig but dw abt it

ohhh I have these slick pastel box cutters and every time I open a package my mind goes 'oh it would feel SO good to split open your own skin with this fucking thing like think about how thin the skin on your face is come on it'll peel like a sticker' and I have to be like 'NOOOO today is NOT the day I slice open my skin in the most beautiful and satisfying way ever conceived!!!!' but I get a lot of packages so this is a recurring problem!!!

[livlaughloveluke]

𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐠𝐚𝐫𝐞𝐭- 𝐞.𝐥

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: ever since that night on the rooftop, you’ve known

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: a little cursing, brief mention of past toxic relationship, ethan being an absolute sweetheart

𝐚/𝐧- clearing out my drafts rn so im kinda posting a lot! this ones kinda short and sweet, but i think its cute 💗 also, you might want to listen to margaret by lana del rey, it will help this make sense 😭

margaret (feat. bleachers) by lana del rey

02:45 ━━━━●───── 05:40 ⇆ㅤ ㅤ◁ㅤ ❚❚ ㅤ▷ ㅤㅤ↻

ethan’s heart sunk at the sight of someone on the roof, where he normally he spent his sleepless nights, thinking alone. he cautiously approached the mysterious figure, only to find out that it was a women who looked to be around his age, dressed in a lengthy white dress, with gorgeous shimmery pearls hanging loosely around your neck. 

there was something enchanting about this moonlight. you looked incredible, despite your glossy eyes and runny mascara, which had given away the fact that you had been crying. 

“you okay?” ethan muttered, unsure of what to do or say to the dazzling young girl. you jump, startled by the presence of another person. you wipe away what was left of your mascara, trying to clean up a little.

“yeah..? yeah.” you said, the first word sounding like you were trying to convince yourself, while the second ‘yeah’ sounding more persuasive and firm.

 “wanna talk about it?” the brown eyed boy suggested, unsure where he got his confidence from. something about the stranger on the rooftop made him want to learn more. 

“well, my boyfriend just broke up with me on our 6 month anniversary. he said he was taking me out to celebrate, but ended up dumping me while we were eating, elle woods style.” you shared. 

“he sounds like a real asshole. maybe it was for the best.” ethan stated. 

“i think you’re right. he was kind of an asshole.” the girl giggled in response. 

ethan grinned, taking in her beauty as they stared at each other. 

“well, i shared my story, now what about you? why are you here tonight? your girlfriend dump you?” you jokes, although you remained curious to what he reply was.

“uhm- no, no girlfriend. i like to come out here when i cant sleep. it helps me think.” he answers, taking a deep breath of the crisp, chilly air. he approached the ledge, and sat down, legs hanging off the building. it was scary the first few times, but recently he came to enjoy it. there was something so freeing about the risks of being this high up.

you mirror his actions and sit next to him. you look at the breathtaking view, before realizing there was a much better view right beside you.

you face him to ask a question. 

“how do you know?” 

ethan tilted his head in confusion, your question was to vague for him to answer. you continue talking, giving more context.

“what if he was the love of my life? how do i know?” this time, ethan can answer your question easily.

“that’s your answer, the answer is no. if you have to ask, then he wasn’t your true love. when you know, you’ll know.” 

you just hummed in response. 

“we never properly introduced ourselves. I don’t even know your name.” you inform him.

“we don’t even know each others names, and yet i still feel closer to you than anyone else in my life.” he added, letting out a dry chuckle, trying to hide how pathetic that was.

“i feel the same. you probably know more about my feelings than any of my friends, and we’ve known each other for what, five minutes?” you added. he was relieved that you shared the same emotions as him. 

you stuck out your hand. “my name is y/n.”

ethan got the memo and reached to shake your hand. the contact made butterflies fill his stomach. “my name is ethan.” he replied.

“ethan? i would have never guessed that was your name. don’t get me wrong, i think its lovely, but you look more like a conner to me.” 

ethan laughed at your comment, and swiftly formed a response. “conner? really? i think i look more like an axel.” 

“i could see that i guess, but all i can think about when i hear the name axel is this kid who bullied me in second grade.” you giggle.

“you were bullied by a kid named axel?” he teases. 

“yes!! and every day he would tell the teacher on me for something I didn’t even do!! and worse, the teacher believed him!” you were now full blown laughing, along with ethan who was starting to really enjoy talking to you.

you and him continued chatting a little longer, asking basic questions, but you wanted more. you wanted to know the real ethan.

“im tired of all these simple questions. lets go more in depth. for starters, if you only had one day left to live, would you tell anyone? why or why not?” you ask him. 

“woah. to be honest, i don’t think i would tell anyone until the end of the day, you know? why ruin your last day alive by being constantly pitied, if you could spend it happily with the people you love most?” he announced, and you nodded your head in agreement.

“now i ask you something. if were getting murdered, and got to choose the way you were killed, what would you pick?”

“wow, that took a turn. i would probably choose to get poisoned. its not painful really, and its pretty quick. just don’t poison me with bleach. i hate the smell of it.” you declared. 

this caused you both to start laughing again, to the point where your stomach hurt. after your giggle fest, your exhaustion got the best of you, and you yawned, sleepily. your actions did not go unnoticed by ethan, and he decided to call it a night. he helped walk you home, making sure to keep you safe. 

you talked the whole way home, mainly about your music taste. he was into the alternative indie kinda music, and you bonded over a few artists. then, you reached your dorm. you exchanged numbers, none of you wanting this relationship to end.

for the next week, you texted each other constantly, giving song recommendations, and just learning about one another in general. you figured out you both went to blackmore university, and took a few of the same classes. you were surprised you hadn’t seen him before, but then again, two weeks ago you weren’t looking. 

you were supposed to meet him on the rooftop again tonight. this time however, you wouldn’t be caught sulking in a dress. you changed into a more comfortable, yet gorgeous look.

eleven pm rolled around, and you headed up to the roof. ethan was already waiting for you, a bouquet of tulips in his hands. he handed them to you, and you couldn’t hold your smile back. 

“how’d you know these were my favorite?!” you  questioned him. 

“you’re mentioned it a couple times. i researched the meaning, and it turns out they symbolize growth and new beginnings, which i thought was perfect, because of your recent relationship ending and uh i-“ 

you cut him off with a hug, holding the flowers off to the side, not wanting to crush them. you pull apart so you could face him when talking. 

“they’re beautiful, eth. I can’t believe you put so much effort into them.” you informed him.

your ex boyfriend was a total dickhead, who never really cared. you weren’t sure if he even got you flowers once in your relationship. it was new having someone that cared, and the feeling of being truly loved was definitely not unwelcome. 

you both sat on the edge and started babbling like last time. 

“you know who i’d think you’d like? faye webster. she’s really good, and while she’s well known, she’s definitely underrated.” you blurt out. 

“I’ll listen to her tonight. whats your spotify?” he asks. you share your account and both follow eachother. he starts scrolling through your playlists and reviewing them. 

“taylor swift? really, y/n? i thought you were better than this.” he sarcastically says. you act offended, before retorting back. 

“taylor swift is so good! she’s popular for a reason. maybe you just haven’t heard the right album. i feel like you would like evermore or folklore.” he shakes his head, disapprovingly. he claimed he would never listen to one of her songs. (he spent 2 hours that night listening to the albums you suggested)

eventually, it got late and he started walking you home. out of the blue, he asked you an important question. 

“would you maybe want to go out with me one night? officially?” he managed to stutter out. 

“i’d love to, eth.” you respond. 

you had never really been completely sure of something, but that night you knew one thing. you were in love with ethan landry.

[fumifooms]

Hi! I really love your Chilchuck analysis and headcanons. Are there any songs that remind you of him/think suits his character?

😏Why yes indeed I do! I have a couple playlists for him, not one for just him quite yet, but there are still songs that are more about him than the relationship/them in every playlist bc that’s just how playlists are with me, I have this one about him & his wife, (songs aren’t ordered) this marchil one, (ony partially with a song order) this marchil angst one… (believe it or not the songs are fully ordered except the last few songs) And this one I actually haven’t shared yet but just bc of the whole ~working class ethnicity~ thing I see a lot of my culture in Chil/half-foots so have a french canadian Quebecer Chilchuck playlist but uh yeah the songs are all in french, it’s mostly folk. If I worked any faster and better I’d love to make some animatics with some of these… I still got some plans though. So far my favorite Chilchuck playlist not by me that’s underrated banger after banger and each reallt fits is one by my buddy @lyril ! It’s short and sweet, prob with more of the character focus that you’re looking for. Little Lion Man oh my god 😭😭

These playlists are for trudging through lists of songs and finding the good bits & meaning in them yourself buuut I have picked out a bunch of specific lyrics and songs I really like for him in this post before, and not unlike that, I have a couple web weavings with song lyrics for him, one on Chilchuck & wife and a marchil one, and again if you’re not interested in the relationships there are still stuff in there that fit him specifically so I still recommend skimming.

Jackrabbit by San Fermin, Dead Inside by Younger Hunger, TrusT by Half-alive, Cheap Liquor by Ericdoa, Heart-shaped Box by Nirvana... Some songs that come to mind for him rn. TrusT is one of my top songs for him I looove it and I think the music does enhance the lyrics it’s soo…

Trust is like a pond of murky water Too dark to see, mysteriously undercover I can't jump off the high dive, even though I really want to My toes are hanging off the ledge Trust is like the middle of the ocean Can't see the bottom, but I'm floating here, supported I know that it can take me even deeper if I let it But my limbs are trying to swim away It's like a tree that towers 50 feet above us Grown over time through many seasons Believing in something more than just the surface I trust that this is worth it But my toes are hanging off the ledge Hold to this significance And lean into the process Rest and know the love you hold It won't be taken back, no I have faith that the world I'm in Will be redeemed to its place again But there's a weight that I can't explain So tell me why I feel this way tell me why I feel this way (Speaking slowly when I'm out of breath) (Losing confidence between the steps) tell me why I feel this way how sweet, the taste of certainty (Wasting water in a desert bed) (Chasing wind outside the promised land) releasing hope to carry me (Know the story isn't over yet)

Anyone who knows me knows my favorite Chil & Chilwife song is Little Soldiers by The Crane Wives. And well, there’s a reason Hurry Hurry is on almost every Chil playlist. Drunk by The Living Tombstone is a staple for me too. And oughh I recommend this animatic of Well it’s better than the alternative it’s so 😭 10/10 please please watch

Ohh and one of my fav Chil fanart ever is this one if you scroll all the way down and the song that goes with it is Call Boy by Syudou. It’s the only place where you can see it rn sorry, this ask is incredibly timed actually bc just yesterday I went looking for this fanart again and saw that the artist’s twitter got deleted and there’s still the art on Pixiv but there used to be a video and that’s the one that truly fully git my heart </3 I dmed the artist asking on if the video is still up anywhere so crossing my fingers about when/if I get a reply… Here’s the lyrics for Call Boy, give it a listen it gets me keeling over to the floor. CW alcoholism and also gotta scroll through suggestive stuff bc the art link is Pixiv 🎶