#like thats not enough for me to be my special little princess self....

[couldoneimagine]

worked my first retail day today. I have been pretty lax on my leftism the past couple of years but yeah this capitalism shit is definitely not working, let's fucking do something else maybe

[tommybaholland]

bnha boys as viral tiktok sounds + their reaction

featuring: bakugo, kirishima, kaminari, amajiki and dabi

bakugo swearing, mentions of titties, dabi gets suggestive. you know, the usual. enjoy!

bakugo  

physical embodiment of ‘how big are those titties bitch?! hurry up, i’m getting weird stares!’ 

you have him listen to the sound and you’re like ‘this u?’

“WHAT?? i sound nothing like THAT, you IDIOT” 

“and DONT ask me to make one of those stupid videos”

and of course you ask him and at first he’s pretty resistant to the idea

but he could never resist for long 

“OKAY FINE, IDIOT. just tell me what to do.”

you tell him what he should do and start the video

you make him hold up a tape measure and everything like you had seen in other videos

he seems to get into it and playfully shakes you by the shoulders while yelling the last line, making you laugh

“there. now stop bothering me and you better NOT post that anywhere.”

“thank you, katsuki,” pressing a kiss to his cheek, making him go red 

“yeah, whatever.”

you’re already thinking about how you can convince him to let you post it >:))

he finally lets you post it but only lets you keep public for one (1) day

but thats long enough to get everyone’s attention 

kirishima actually notifies him of the popularity and even turns baku’s attention to the comments

“dude, everyone thinks you’re so cool! and even some people are...well..”

amongst the simp comments, he becomes livid over the one that are like, “so...how big are their titties??👀” 

and it doesn’t bother you because people will just say whatever they want on the internet 

but he feels like he at least needs to reaffirm something 

“i dont care how big your... titties are. they’re big enough and i love you just the way you are.” 

then he grabs you and pulls you closer to him and starts attacking your neck with kisses

“now put that shit on private or i will reign hellFIRE on all those IDIOTS” 

kirishima 

definitely that one that goes ‘*sigh* i love you *kiss kiss kiss kiss* you set my soul on fire’ 

he’s familiar and comfortable with tiktok so you decide to surprise him with the sound that makes you think of him

“what do you want me to do, pebble?” he asks curiously, holding you in his lap as you set up your phone

“nothing. just be your cute and manly self. ready?” 

you start the video and look him right in the eyes as you sigh and say, “i love you” before leaning in to make him think your lips are gonna touch his

but then you quickly change direction and press multiple kisses to his cheek on the kissing part, making him giggle loudly and hug you close to him

you look back into his bright eyes while speaking the last line and he sees an opportunity to caress your cheeks to pull you in for a passionate kiss at the last second 

and the camera catches ALL of it 

he thinks it’s super cute and encourages you post it 

you’re not one to flaunt your relationship on social media but you do it thinking it’s not going to get much attention anyway

but it blows tF UP 

it gets to almost 1M views and 400k likes in just two days 

even though you made the tiktok, all the comments are about your boyfriends cute ass reaction like “oh to be them 😔” “the WAY that he looked at them and kissed them like😭” “if my boyfriend doesn’t do this then i don’t want him”

you show him how much attention he’s getting like, “wow kiri, they love you!”

and he gets all modest like, “i think they love you too because you’re my cute little pebble! now give your boulder a kiss..”

is totally down to make more tiktoks with you anytime <3

 kaminari 

this is not denki slander but 

‘you don’t have a thought behind those eyes, do you? sweet boy’

he’s actually the one that brings it up and shows you immediately when he hears the sound

he’ll be like, “is this what you think of me?”

and he’s joking but you know he can be self-deprecating sometimes 

“of course not, babe...well, sometimes. only when you’ve short circuited.”

he appreciates your honesty but still looks kinda sad about it 

you get closer, and caress the sides of his head to make him look at you

“you are a sweet boy, though. you’re my sweet boy.” and then you make him giggle by giving him eskimo kisses 

he wants you to film a video with the sound while his brain is fried 

at first you’re like, “are you sure?”

and he says he wants to keep it to remind him how great you are when you’re not around

he’s too cute so you agree

he makes himself short circuit pretty easily and without using his quirk by reading one of momo’s books with a lot of large, confusing words in it

you start the video and look him in the eyes to say the first part while holding his face

on the ‘sweet boy’ part you pull him to rest his head on your shoulder while your stroke his hair carefully

after you stop the video and he calms down he watches it and thinks it’s cute that you continue to hold him even though he emits small waves of electricity that can shock you 

“you’re the best s/o, you know that? i love you so much, my wonderful buzzy babe.” and he hugs you real tight

you offer to let him post it if he wants 

“no way, this is too special to share with anyone else.”

he is such a sweet boy >.<

amajiki 

thought about this one long and hard bc there’s honestly nothing cuter than this shy boi 

but ultimately 

‘you’re my honey bunch sugar plum pumpy-umpy-umpkin you’re my sweetie pie’

he doesn’t understand why you associate him with it when you show him

“because you’re so cute and precious, especially when you get all nervous and shy”

he disagrees, “no, bunny, i think you’re the cute and precious one here.” 

easily starts a ‘no you’re cuter’ war between you two 

but then he suddenly gets really nervous

“you’re, you’re uh, not gonna post a video about me, are you?” 

you’re like, ‘of course not’ but that doesn’t stop you from singing the song to him everytime hes being a cutie 

which is like, everyday 

and he thinks it’s equally embarrassing 

“bunny, please. i, i know you love that song, but i want to be cool.”

he just doesn’t get it

“but you’re both cool and cute, tamaki. the duality of you is one of the many reasons why i love you so much. i may be cute but i could never be as cool as you.” 

he’s so red in the face but he has to take the chance to kiss you with everything he has 

because if he can’t say it at first, he just feels it and does it 

“i love you so much, too, bunny. and you’re cute and so many other w-wonderful things. please never forget that.”

in conclusion *exhales* i love tamaki amajiki 

dabi 

two words: simp scream

you know what i’m talking about 

that’s the only sound i think about when i see this man

it’s either this or the one that’s like ‘sometimes bad things happen to people with nice tits’

but anyway so...simp scream 

one time you decided to make a tiktok with that sound while you two were getting ready for bed 

you’re just lying there, all innocent, and start filming right before he pulls his shirt off

he turns over to you with your phone propped up on your stomach

smirks once he realizes you’re filming and walks over to you as the ‘WOW w o w’ part plays 

you’re able to catch all of it before he gets on top of you, hovering above with a devilish smirk still present on his marred face

your phone falls against your stomach when he pins your hands down to the mattress

“what do you think you’re doing, hm princess?”

and before you answer he’s already leaning down to kiss and nip at your neck

you giggle as you reply, “nothing...just admiring my favorite burnt boy”

“well,” he lifts his head back up but remains close to your face, speaking seductively

“if you wanted to make a video with me, babydoll,” he kisses your lips slowly

“all you had to do was ask...”

[the rest of this headcanon was redacted bc mans too hot]

how we feeling on this lovely bnha night?? send all your desires and requests..

[oh-for-fic-sake]

Would you ever write something about daddy Henry giving his little maintenance spankings to make sure she behaves (because she's a little brat)?😋

Summary: Maintenance spanking for a naughty little girl who didnt want her icecream after dinner.

Warnings: DDLG, Spanking, Swearing, Temper Tantrums, a Waste Of Ice Cream

Tagging: @viking-raider

"What the hell was that young lady?" Henry growled as he thundered down the hall hearing your foul language.

After throwing a tantrum in the kitchen about eating veggies you'd had the audacity to get up from the table without being excused and thought he let you eat ice-cream instead.

It was a ballsy move, opening the icebox freezer when he had told you not to and fishing out ice-cream he had forbid you from eating before finishing your dinner.

Henry had enough by that point, you'd done all this in front of him with a haughty little expression

You thought you'd be spared a spanking because of your tooth ache but you were wrong, very wrong.

After standing up and confiscating the spoon you'd got to eat your icecream you'd run off whilst he called for you to sit down and eat your dinner.

You huffed and left the kitchen tipping over your chair on the way out prompting him to follow.

And now here he was standing at the door to the living room where you had stormed off to and was now sulking.

"you want to repeat that to my face little one?" he growled hearing the half muttered curse words you were calling him.

"N-nothing daddy" you gasped panicking slightly eyes wide as you realise your little fit may have just cost you.

"Oh no go on daddy's a what? Come on tell me" he grunted tipping his head at you frowning non to impressed with you cussing him out under your breath.

"Go on princess what is daddy?" He grunted staring at you

"A... very handsome amazing king?" You tried to backtrack and pretend that you hadn't just been cussing him out to Kal who was sitting in the corner giving you the 'ooo your in trouble' eyes.

"Really because it sounded to me that you called me an asshole?" Henry asked shifting on his feet casually looking huge and intimidating by the door blocking your only exit.

"No daddy I-I'd never do that!" you spoke voice going high as you realised he may be serious this time.

"And lying too? Oh no poppet! No no no!" He growled crossing the room.

You squeaked and turned on all fours trying to scamper away over the sofa.

You were fast but he was faster henry managed to cross the room and sit on the sofa capturing your ankles and dragged you back as you whimpered yelling as he held you face down over his lap.

"Now here we go, a little brat needing a reminder~" he hummed striking your up turned bottom in a loud slap, the sting was instant even through the jeans.

"And why? Because daddy is an asshole that wont let you eat a whole litre tub of caramel ice-cream after refusing to eat your dinner" he huffed holding you down with one hand as you made a fuss.

"No I'm sorry daddy no!" You whined kicking out trying to find some leverage to kick off and escape.

Henry moved propping his knee higher so you wouldn't kick the table beside the sofa and knock everything off.

"Now now none of that, after all I'm an asshole and wont listen" he said in a jovial mood despite you being rude?

"bu-but daddy my tooth hurts!!??" you yipped trying to fight him but he was just to big and strong.

"and now your ass will too!" He muttered moved quickly tugging your jeans down as you squirmed wriggling your hips trying to get away only managing to help him pull them over your bottom dragging your small knickers with them leaving you bare.

You cried out covering your bottom only for him to tuck both wrists in one hand holding them in your back before letting out a chuckle.

"Oh baby look at this pale little rump~" he teased patting the still cold cheeks rubbing a little heat into them.

"Noo daddy please don't! I'm sorry!" you cried out as he move popping your cheeks a few times letting a slow warmth creep across them.

"Nothing says sorry like a little red tushy and you haven't had one of those in a while love its why your being a brat!" he commented before landing heavier spanks across your bottom.

You kicked out but it was futile, you whined in defeat hanging your head sniffling resigning yourself to a spanking.

"Good girl, now you hold still while daddy sees to this very naughty botty" he said cheerfully before beginning to administer a proper thrashing.

Your sobbing began quite quickly as he began to impart a lesson onto your vulnerable cheeks scolding you all the while about being rude and naughty.

You squirmed as he lit a fire in your ass giving you something to be sorry about, leaving stinging burning swats over the whole of your ass without breaking a sweat.

"there we go! A very red bottom~ Something to be embarrassed about"

"oh baby your butt is soo cute all red and hot~ like a tiny rip cherry daddy is tempted to take a bite" he teased as you wailed below the sting was to much and your bottom was swelling already.

" there we go! A very sorry little princess...Now you will be marching right back to the table and eat your veggies without the attitude!" he scolded finally tipping you up to stand you your own two feet beside him as you sobbed into your hands trying to hide your shameful tears in your palms.

"y-yes daddy... B-but my tooth really did hurt daddy" you offered pitifully as you wiped your face on your sleeves.

"i know, you have a trip to the dentist tomorrow for an emergency appointment" he explained slowly bending over to capture your knickers and began shimmying them up your legs.

"nooOOOoo daddy i dont wana goo!!!" you complained at him shaking your knees trying not to stomp at him before your undies were even covering you.

"well thats a shame isnt it? Your going now come on up we get" he drolled finally pulling your knickers over your bottom but made you step out of your jeans

"daddy?- I want-" you pointed to your thick jeans that would offer some protection should he decide to give you a few more swats.

"nope, these are staying off, its warm enough and means I can get to you easier if you start acting up again now into the kitchen" and stood up pointing to the door.

You blinked at him eyes still wet with tears, lip quivering but he raised a brow prompting you to spin and head for the door at a snails pace.

"mush" he said walking behinde you patting your tender ass making you yelp and move faster.

"now you will finish half of your mash potato and all of your carrots! Daddy made soft veggies specially for you tonight and your sore tooth" he instructed leading you over to your seat whilst fetching your plate out of the oven where henry had put it to keep warm before chasing you.

You sniffed but took the offered fork and began eating small bites feeling sorry for yourself.

Henry moved to the sink quickly rinsing his own plate once he was sure you were eating nicely.

"oh look? The icecream you were trying to sneak is all melted now well that is a shame isn't it?" he said whilst picking up the drenched ben and jerry's carton you had been trying to steal.

He shook his head and stepped on the peddle of the bin

You whined tearing up as the carton hit the bottom of the bin with finality.

Instantly you burst into tears again holding your arms out making grabby hands to him.

"come on love eat your dinner" the scolded nodding to your half full plate.

"b-but daddy that was a full carton?!" you cried out loud upset over the loss of your special icecream.

"yes well brats don't get icecream now finish your dinner" he said with no remorse what's ever

"but what about pudding?" you whimpered moving to nibble another baby carrot as slowly as you possibly could.

"you get none, now hurry and eat before daddy thinks you need another reminder to do as your told" he threatened calmly leaning back on the counter watching you closely as you picked at your food.

You looked down in self pity and began to eat a little faster

"if you finish everything on your plate you can have some chocolate custard" he caved unable to see you so miserable but wanted to remain firm.

"r-really daddy?" you sniffled peering at him shyly

"yes poppet but only if you clean your plate" he reiterated making you smile softly to yourself and nodded before eating your dinner nicely.

[insufferablelust]

ok, i know i just requested but i LOVE your writing. spencer is the dominant one, but one night you ask him if you can be in charge. to your surprise he said yes, so you maybe tie him to the bed and blindfold him. you edge him and make him beg. you give him after care, make she he is alright. maybe it ends in some fluff, him saying how you are cute when you take charge.

I swear i always got so excited when i get a request from this special princess right here, anways thank you for requesting ma’am! here’s some sub!spencer for all of us needy babies. As always excuse any errors thank you❤️

WARNINGS : OKAY SMUT- JUST FILTHY PORN OF Sub!Spencer x Dom!Reader, they’re actually both switch, Bondage, Slight Exhibitionism, the use of ‘Miss’, Edging, Short Ice play, Penetrative sex by riding, creampie, um what else.. oh! degradation a bit, and condensation from the reader too :) just some good ole FILTH okay + Cute Spencer :)

It started out as a suggestion you made at the beginning of your relationship, knowing the nature of your relationship, Spencer always had the upper hand when it comes to sexual things even during domestic days where you needed to be disciplined for being a stuck up brat, it’s your speciality after all.

What you suggested was that you would love to take control once in a while, you know one of the only things that you love about being dominated is to relinquish any control and let go, to be taken care of and Spencer is the epitome of the perfect dom.

But because of that very reason, you also want him to feel relaxed and relinquish control, just— to let go for a while, letting you to just take the wheel and dominate him in every way possible. You’ve made that suggestion long time ago, but it keeps circling back to your mind lately, one because Spencer has been taking care of you after an accident on a case, two you can see how frustrated he is with his work— even though you work together, he’s the type that clings onto specific cases like the one he kept talking about, and lastly, it’s just because... You just want to dominate him, to hear him beg, to see him so helpless and needy, to tease him, to edge him, and the list goes on and on that you are convinced that you will get him to submit to you, tonight.

Wrapping your arms around his shoulder from the back of his chair, you pressed a soft kiss on the side of his face as he chuckled softly and tilt his head to see you.

“Hi there, Agent Y/n,” his voice sounded scratchy and deeper today that you can’t help but to imagine how it would sound when he’s begging you to let him cum. Fuck, you cursed yourself for deciding to wear a bright colored pants today.

You rolled your eyes as an answer to his greeting before setting yourself on his lap sideways, thumb still trying to smoothen over the worry lines on his forehead but that doesn’t last long because he reached out to grip your wrist and whispered “Don’t dare roll your eyes at me, you know the damn rules Y/n”

Oh how you love a challenge but this time its going to be your rules not his. You placed your other hand on his before detaching his arms, and leaned down to whisper on his ear, lips barely brushing against the skin. “It’s my rules tonight, we will play by my game my rules and i’m in control.”

The shocked look on his face thats followed with a seductive whimper is enough to give you the affirmation you need to keep going. You tug on his tie, as you look around smiling at the sight of an almost empty office (everyone is grabbing lunch), before pressing your lips against his in a bruising manner.

Usually, he would’ve won the battle, but nothing about today or tonight is going to just be the ‘usually’ so you tug on his tie tighter that caught him off guard, which allowed you to slip your tongue past his sinful lips and devour his sweet sweet warm mouth. Your hips doesn’t miss the party either, grinding down right on his bulge as you pull back— watching his flustered cheeks and teary eyes.

“Aww Look at you, i’ve barely done anything and you’re ruined already. God i’ll have so much fun playing with you.” Your smiles scream mischievous, usually he would bend you over by now and spank you til your ass is every shades of blue and purple. But today— today he only whined as his hips bucks up against you.

“Do something.. baby please” Oh how sweet is this, his voice all raspy and desperation dripping out of it like fucking honey. You can’t help but to press down on his bulge, palm it slowly as you shake your head “Nuh uh, Good boys wait Doctor, you know that.” Your fake sympathetic pouts are what nearly sent him over the edge,

“You’ll p-pay fuck!- for this, Little one.” He let his dominant self shown for awhile before you wrap your fingers around his throat and clicking your tongue “That can wait until later but now, you’re my needy little thing now, so don’t get mouthy or i swear to god i’ll shove my dildo up those fuckable throat of yours.” Just as he was about to answer, you heard the ‘ding’ of the elevator, causing you to stand up before patting his bulge twice “Be a good boy, and maybe your punishment won’t be that hard.” you whispered before walking away to your desk.

————————

When Spencer arrived home, he wasn’t sure what to expect from you, he was excited of course, his raging hard on is still prominent- the reminiscent of your voice kept playing in his mind and that alone could make him burst then and there.

He walked to the bedroom you both shared, mouth agape at the sight of you wearing your black lingerie and he also sees your wand on top of the bed, smiling nervously as he approached you.

“Don’t just stare, Doctor. Come take a closer look at what you’ll be wearing.. or playing with tonight.” You grinned as you let him inspect the objects— sex toys. On top of the bed you’ve prepared were ropes, blindfold, your wand, and also some ice cubes on the metal bucket.

“M-miss you’ll use all of this on me?” His timid demeanor is so different from how he usually gets when he’s horny and the thought of blurring the line of submission and dominance is making you clench your thighs. You’re each other equal, with each of your own submissiveness and dominance. It’s all balanced and hearing it almost feels like an orgasmic experience.

“Yes, baby. But if at some point during our play time you feel the slightest bit comfortable you have to color out okay? coloring out doesn’t mean that you’re a disappointment but its to know your limits, okay?” He gladly nodded as his lips curled into a smile “I know miss.”

“I know you know, but you rarely becomes submissive and it can get pretty overwhelming especially if you have me as your dom, i hope you aren’t expecting orgasms soon.” With that and a loud whine from him, you stand up before ordering him to lay down on the bed right after you’ve places the blindfold on top of his eyes.

“Okay, baby. I’m going to tie you up now, if its too tight then tell me, communicate is key Spencer” You sternly said, earning a small “Yes, miss” from him. You picked the rope before tying both of his wrists onto the headboard and move down to tie each ankles to the bed post.

“How does it feel, Doctor? Too tight?”

“N-no miss, Just perfect..”

“Good, get ready for me to ruin you.”

——————

You’ve barely even touch him, ghosting your fingers on top of his neck, against his nipples and down to where his cock is hard against his tummy.

“You’re pathetic, look at you, making such a mess on yourself.” You scoffed, bending down to lick the very tip of his cock that rested against his stomach, causing him to jolt at the sensation and buck upwards. You gathered enough pre cum on your lips before pressing it onto his— kissing him in a soft manner this time, letting him savor his own taste from your mouth.

“mmh! miss please!” He whines, trying to gain some friction by bucking his hips upwards against the air which earned him a slap on his thighs, “This is my body, mine to use whenever i please so think again before you start begging.” You harshly whispered, as you bring the ice you’ve been holding and place it in between your mouth.

The cold sensation that trailed down his skin is almost unbearably pleasurable, the way it tickles his skin causing goosebumps to his wake and makes him squirm like a bitch in heat. Your lips trail down his tummy before the tip of your ice cube pressed tightly against the tip of his sensitive ruddy red cock— and you were shocked when you heard the loudest string of moans Spencer ever let out, biting your lip as you feel yourself soaking your own thighs.

“Ahh! fuck please miss! make me cum please!” His voice is strained and scratchy evidence that you teased him so good he lose his voice. The only answer you give him is “Quiet.” before leaving the ice cube to melt down against the tip of his cock, pulsing with need.

As the ice cube melts, you grab your wand before turning it on, setting the speed to the lowest level, and placing it on the veiny sides of his cock. He jumped suddenly as the vibrations ran through his body— he feels like every system inside him is exposed and raw.

“Oh fuck oh fuck! miss! Fuck M-may i cum?” Y/n contemplate as to let him cum or no, the sweet torture is too precious to give but you also know that you need to finish too somehow.

So without warning, you pulled the wand away, as spencer let out a frustrated whine, he was going to cum! “Don’t be fucking greedy or i swear to god i’ll tie you up right here, strap the wand on your messy cock and leave you to cum and cum again and again until you pass out.” you warned, as he took a deep breath and apologize, voice shaky. “Y-yes miss i’m so sorry.. I love you.” That’s a sign that he’s breaking into subspace and you definitely have to let him cum soon so he wouldnt far too deep.

“I love you baby, you’ve been so good for me, just a bit more okay? and then i’ll let you cum inside me hm?”

“Fuck! yes please miss!” His voice is needy and desperate as i slowly align the tip against my slit, before sinking down on his length— causing both of us to gasps and moan out loud. “Spencer Fuck! You’re so fucking big” You moaned as you threw your head back and start to bounce up and down his cock, making sure to fasten the pace with each thrust.

“Yes yes! your cunt feels so good miss!” He lets out noises that sounded so beautiful, almost like music to your ears, that fueled you to keep on bouncing on his cock, tightening your walls around him as you feel like you’re getting close.

“Baby! fuck yes yes! mmm i’m going to cum sweetheart” You laughed as he struggled to breath, your fingers pressing down on your throat as you roll your hips down. “Tell me.. tell me my genius doctor, do you want to breathe—“ “or cum?”

Spencer squirmed as he heard the question, biting his lips and moans suddenly as i keep on bouncing on his cock “fuck i’m going to cum- answer me now or you won’t get both.” You threatened quickly earning an answer from the poor boy,

“Cum, miss please let me cum inside of you- please i need it!”

At that you cum all over his cock, rolling your hips to ride out your high, you were shaky and feeling floaty but you regained yourself quickly as you hear Spencer begged.

“M-miss please—“

“Cum, now. Cum, baby boy. that’s it let it out.. oh good boy, I’m so proud of you.” You whimpered out the last bit as you feel him coat your walls with his cum, before pulling out, untie him from each 4 restraint and loosen the blindfold.

You smiled as you sees his face, grabbing the water bottle you had on the night stand and ordering him to take few gulps before taking some your own. You grabbed the wet cloth as you wiped the both of you.

“How was that baby.. do you like it?” There’s uncertainty in your voice, as fuzzy as his mind might be. “I loved every single bit of it, sweetheart” Spencer said pulling her close as they cuddled after wiping each other off.

“mmm i’m glad then”

“Just wait until its my turn again, you will wish you hadn’t even try to dominate me. Cause you’re cute, when you take charge.”

“Shh, lets sleep Doctor”

“Just so you know i haven’t forget about any of this, and your eye roll. Hope you know that you’ll regret it.”

———————

Blurb ideas are always welcomed as well as constructive criticisms and feedback!

Thank you for reading! I love you❤️

[sugakookielix]

BTS Reaction: You Wear a Revealing Outfit

Prompt: You wear a revealing/sexy outfit in front of the boys 

Requested? Yes 

Genre: Smut, Fluff

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings: Suggestive Themes, Swearing

Female reader. Gifs are not mine!

Masterlist

_________________________________________

Kim Namjoon:

It honestly wasn’t too uncommon for you to wear clothes that were tight fitting or that showed off a bit of skin. You felt a lot more confident when you wore these things and you knew that Namjoon loved when you wore them as well. He never really had a problem with you showing off your figure a bit, since you did look good and he felt that you should wear what makes you feel comfortable. It had been a few weeks since you had really been able to spend time with your boyfriend and Namjoon finally got a night off so he figured the two of you could go out. He had gotten a reservation at your favorite restaurant and had bought you a new dress for the occasion. It was tight fitting to show off your curves and short enough that it barely touched your thighs. Pair the dress with your favorite heels and makeup and you were set to go. When Namjoon saw you walk into the living room he immediately ran his gaze across your body, drinking in every detail with a smirk. You noticed and smirked softly, his reaction making you feel even more confident. 

“Like what you see?” you asked teasingly, causing Namjoon to smirk as well as he walked over to you. 

“A lot,” he said as he rested his hands on your hips, pulling you over to him. You wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him softly, which he eagerly returned. “Damn baby girl,” Namjoon growled when you pulled away, “I’m half tempted to skip dinner and rip that dress off of you.” You laughed softly and hit his chest. 

“I did not get all dressed up for nothing, you’ll just have to contain yourself until we get home.” Namjoon hummed in thought as he buried his face into your neck. 

“No promises.” 

Kim Seokjin:

To Jin, you had always been his innocent princess. With your cute expression and oversized sweatshirts, (that were his 90% of the time). He loved that look on you, and it did always make you look small and innocent. You had never really worn anything that showed off your body. Not because you were insecure, but just because you found the baggier and larger outfits more comfortable. This time however, was a bit of a special occasion. This was the first award show that you would be attending with Jin and you wanted to look your best. Afterall, if you were dating World Wide Handsome, you had to look the part. You had gotten in contact with one of the stylists and she had helped you pick out a nice dress. It was floor length and not too tight fitting, but it was low cut and showed off quite a bit of your cleavage. You were a bit nervous to be seen with it, but it was too late to change. 

You were waiting in the room for Jin to come and grab you so you could head out together, nervously playing with your hands. Jin had walked in a moment later, in the middle of greeting you but he stopped once he saw you. 

“Jagi, what are you wearing?” he stuttered out after a minute. You frowned softly and looked down at yourself. 

“Do you not like it?” 

“No no I love it!” he assured, “it’s just, kind of revealing don’t you think?” He didn’t mind it at all, you looked amazing. However, given the thoughts that he was having seeing you in it, he knew others would have the same idea. 

Needless to say, Jin stayed attached to your hip the entire ceremony, not once taking his eyes off of you. 

Min Yoongi:

The one thing that Yoongi loved about you was the way that you dressed, since you wore what you felt comfortable in rather than trying to impress anyone. You weren’t the most confident in your appearance, so you tended to wear clothes that hide your figure. Yoongi knew this and, despite his constant assurance that you were beautiful, he never pushed you into wearing anything else. It was extremely hot out and your air conditioner wasn’t working so you were walking around the house in only short shorts and a tank top. Evidently, you hadn’t been planning on going out at all today or you would have worn something a bit more modest. Fate seemed to have other ideas though as Yoongi called you, explaining how he left his flash drive there and he desperately needed it in order to finish his work. His voice was stoic as usual, but you could still tell how frantic he was and promised you would be there in a few minutes, quickly grabbing the item in question and rushing out the door. You hadn’t realized what you were wearing until it was too late and you were already pulling up to the building. An annoyed groan left you as you looked for something to cover up but decided to just rush in there quickly and get it over with. Yoongi turned in his chair when he heard you entering his studio, smiling softly and getting ready to thank you before stopping himself upon seeing what you were wearing. You immediately felt self conscious and tried to cover yourself as you quickly walked over and set the drive on his desk, turning to leave when he grabbed your wrist and pulled you into his lap. 

“Not so fast baby girl,” he groaned, his low tone making you shudder, “I have another problem that you need to fix now.” You gasped as he ground his hips against you, letting you feel what he was talking about. Maybe you would have to start wearing these things around him more often

Jung Hoseok:

Hobi had been trying to get you to try dancing with him for a while but you always had a different excuse every time. Not that you didn’t want to spend time with your boyfriend, but you weren’t nearly as good of a dancer as he was. Hoseok was persistent though and cornered you one day when he knew that you were free so you had no choice but to agree. Since it was fairly hot outside and you knew how intense some of his choreo could be. You decided to wear a top that showed off your stomach and sweatpants, tying your hair back so it was out of your face. At first, Hoseok hadn’t noticed the outfit that you were wearing, more focused on his excitement and teaching you the dances. It was only after the two of you decided on a short break that he finally took notice. You were covered in sweat which caused your already tight shirt to stick to your body, leaving very little to the imagination. Hoseok's breath hitched and he quickly looked away to try and clear his head before he got a bit too excited, the poses you were making not helping him either. 

“Hey Hobi,” you called out as you stretched, “can you bring me my water bottle?” He nodded and quickly brought it over to you, still trying to keep his eyes from wandering to your chest. You hadn’t noticed his strange behavior and thanked him as you took a few drinks to help cool yourself down, a few drops slipping past your mouth and dripping onto your chest. The second he saw that, he caved and you quickly found yourself pinned against the wall with your boyfriend's lips roughly pressed against your own. 

“You know Jagi,” Hoseok whispered when he finally pulled away, “that last dance was too easy, why don’t we try one thats a bit...harder.” 

Park Jimin:

Like Jin, Jimin always thought that you were more cute and innocent. You always dressed up in the cutest outfits and you would always shy behind him at the smallest of sounds. He could never really see you as anything else other than his precious baby. It was the weekend and you were planning to spend the night out with your friends since Jimin was still busy with the new album. You wanted to dress up a bit since this night was supposed to be your time to let loose and have fun, but you also were worried about wearing something too extreme. Not that you owned any outfits like that to begin with since outfits that were a little tighter than normal tended to make you nervous. After rummaging through your closet for what felt like the millionth time, you finally settled on a skirt and a semi low cut tank top. It didn’t show off much, but it was still more than you were used to and it made you a bit nervous. You were walking out of your room to grab your things and head out when you heard a familiar voice in the living room. What was Jimin doing home? He said he wasn’t going to be back until late! You froze for a moment before collecting yourself and sneaking to the front door in hopes that Jimin wouldn’t hear you...he did. 

“Jagi?” you heard his soft voice call as he got up and walked over to you, “are you going somewhere? I just got home and I thought…” he trailed off as he took in your appearance. “Jagi, what are you wearing?” You felt your face heat up as you stuttered over your own words trying to come up with an explanation, his gaze making you feel incredibly small. 

“I was just going to go out with a few friends,” you explained, “if I had known that you were going to be home then…”

“Not like that you’re not!” Jimin cut you off, wrapping his arm around your waist and pulling you to him, “sorry baby, but you’ll have to call your friends and cancel. We have other plans now.” 

Kim Taehyung:

Taehyung had finally gotten some time off and the two of you decided to go out and spend some much needed time together. Since the weather was nice, you decided that it would be a great idea to go swimming together. It was fun, would keep you cool, and you had just gotten a new bathing suit so it was a win-win situation. The bathing suit itself was a simple one piece, but it was a bit low in the chest and had straps at the side which showed off quite a bit of skin. Taking a second to glance at yourself in the mirror, you smiled at the way the bathing suit fit you before jogging outside. Taehyung had clearly beaten you there and was already in the water when you walked over. He swam over to the edge and looked up at you with a bright smile, trailing his eyes over your figure. 

“Is it hot out here or is that just you?” he asked, causing you to laugh as you carefully stepped into the water. Your boyfriend seemed to have other ideas though as he grabbed you and pulled you down, giving you seconds to react before you were fully submerged. Once you resurfaced, you glared over at him as he laughed, causing you to push him under as revenge. His arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you down with him so you were both underwater, crashing his lips against yours. 

Jeon Jungkook:

It had taken Jungkook a while to not get shy when he was around you. He was definitely a lot more comfortable and confident around you, but he still managed to get flustered over simple things. The farthest that the two of you had ever gone is kissing and even that was barely more than a light peck. Whenever things started to escalate, one of you would get shy and back off. He had always found you attractive, but never really found the courage to act on it...until now. He had just gotten back from tour and decided that he was going to stop by your place and surprise you, being familiar with your schedule and knowing you would be home. It was your day off and you preferred to stay home and relax rather than go out anywhere. You had actually just gotten out of the shower when you heard someone knocking on the door, quickly scrambling to put on a robe and rushing to the door. You assumed it may have just been your neighbor or a delivery, so you were pleasantly shocked when you saw your boyfriend on the other side of the door. 

“Kookie!” you exclaimed as you jumped into his arms, forgetting about the very thin fabric being the only thing separating your bare form from him. Jungkook surely noticed though, feeling his breath hitch as he cautiously ran his hands across your body. 

“Wow,” he whispered softly, “I came over to try and surprise you and yet I am the one being surprised.” You were about to ask what he meant by that when you felt one of his hands trail down your back to squeeze your thigh, realizing now how exposed you were. 

“Um yeah, let me go get dressed real quick,” you managed to stutter out, but his grip on you only tightened. 

“Stay, I think I like this look on you,” Jungkook purred, “but I think I would like it off even more!”

[datk-popblog]

Imagine...

NCT Dream as Your Boyfriend

(not a request! I thought I’d do a little write write for you guys haha❤️)

Renjun:

He’s such a loving boyfriend. Like he’d do anything to show his affection for/towards you.

Whenever he’s super busy with comebacks or just work in general; he’ll ALWAYS make up for it.

Like for example. If he missed 5 days to spend time with you, he would spend 5 days on little dates with you. It’s the little things he does.

The boys always mention how much he talks about you and omg he gushes everytime.

“What can I say? I’m obsessed with her!”

Cute little nicknames for you like “lovely,” “Buggy bear,” “Honey bee,” and “Doll face”

He likes to make you dinner a lot. Like a lot a lot.

“This is the fourth time you’ve made me dinner in the same week, babe.” “I can’t let my wifey starve!”

He was the type to get your relationship very open to the members but very secret in public.

Renjun always wants to protect you from the hateful critics and what they have to say about your guy’s relationship.

When it came to meeting each other’s parents; man oh man he was a wreck.

“Are they gonna like me? Especially your dad! I have to look very clean and nicely dressed. I can’t look like a jerk!”

He wouldn’t shut up about how nervous he was gonna be the entire ride. It got so bad it started making you overwhelmed and nervous😭

On his days off, he literally took you anywhere you wanted to go.

The spa? He’d get a mani pedi to pamper himself too because he’s a supportive boyfriend so why tf not.

Even dates to the amusement park? Like one day he’d be like “it’s my day off, so, let’s go to the park.”

Even dates to South Korea’s fanciest restaurants like omg.

THIS BOY LOVES TF OUT OF YOU ITS BEYOND.

When it’s sexy time, he knows what you like and how you like it delivered.

One day he found out you can squirt and he’s literally been making you squirt over and over ever since.

Yeah, Renjun looks very innocent on the outside with a dash of glitter to him; but when you two are alone he MANHANDLES the fuck out of you.

Sometimes he doesn’t mean to hurt you. He just is really rough and it comes off super duper aggressive.

After sexy time, he ALWAYS ALWAYS makes sure to nut in your mouth. Whatever position you guys are in, he’ll turn you around or stand you up.

He just loves watching his liquids drip from your lips. He gets off looking at it.

After sex, he’d cuddle you so so hard. Like he’d fuck the hell out of you, but wants to be little spoon? Like dude wtf

“I love you soooo much my lovely.”

Ugh omg just hold this boy and cherish him

Jeno:

He’s such a tease boyfriend and it SHOWS.

He likes to brag about how hot you two look together (and y’all do look hot PAUSE)

“That’s my baby. Her fine self!”

He enjoys bringing you to his practices. He knows you like to watch him dance

Sometimes you’ll be there at the studio for hours and you’ll get super tired.

“I’m sorry I’m taking long baby girl. We’ll be home together soon.” He’d tell you then go back to practicing

The one special thing about Jeno is that he’s soooo reassuring. From little compliments to accomplishments.

He loves to praise you for how much you’ve done and how good you take care of him

“I love you so much. You’ve done everything for me.”

Like if you passed a test or something from school, he’d take you on a date.

Even if you didn’t pass the test he’d still treat you because he loves you so much!

Jeno likes to leave little love notes around your guy’s room. It’s like a scavenger hunt. You’ll find them behind the tv, under your pillow and bed, in your shirt drawer. Literally everywhere.

When it came to announcing your relationship to the world, he wasn’t afraid. He did NOT care at all. Regardless of what the company said. SM told him to wait at least one year and he did it after 6 months.

“I know you’re meant to be my forever. I can feel it in my heart, babe. I know you are.”

When it came to sex, he was super super sweet and slow. He loved taking his time with you. He wasn’t dominant but was when it was the right time.

Lovesssssssss to suck your toes.(IK ITS WEIRD BUT HE LOVES IT!!!!) He loves tf out of your feet???

For your guy’s first time, Jeno put roses on the bed and serenaded you with a guitar and literally had you meLTINGGG.

“I love you so much. Whenever you’re ready; I’m ready.”

He liked for you to be dominant sometimes but would never force you. He never forces you into doing stuff you never wanna do; especially during sex (or in general)

After sexy time, it was shower time together.

You both just hugged one another in the shower and let the water run over you both. And during all this, his thick arms just embraced your frame.

When you were in his arms you felt loved and at home.

“You know I love you right?” “You tell me all the time, Jeno. I’m aware.” “I just love saying it.”

(Jeno is my bias so this made me feel so lonely writing his section. I hate it here😭)

Haechan:

Haechan is known as the sassy one but in the relationship that’s literally how he is. It’s the Gemini in him.

Don’t be surprised if sometimes he has an attitude. He just had a bad day at work.

“I don’t mean to yell or snap at you. You know I love you, baby.” And he’d hold you so so tight

You guys wouldn’t ever argue sometimes but if you did you both would ignore each other.

Then the other mates would have to fix the issue with you both.

“If you guys don’t stop with the petty shit!” -Renjun

Haechan LOVES your kisses.

If you didn’t kiss him in a certain amount of time he’d fake cry and stomp his feet.

“Jagi~~!! I need your kis-“ “omg there. Be quiet”

When he was gone for work (for literal months) it was so hard for you guys to maintain a good long distance relationship.

You guys would FaceTime all the time but it was never the same because you wanted him in person.

“I don’t know the next time I’m able to see your face. I miss you a lot though, baby girl.”

You would see Haechan all the time and how good he was doing on the web but omg YOU MISSED YOUR BABY

Occasionally he’d come back home and stay with you for as long as he needed to.

“You should travel with me and sing with the group. A female touch would be awesome.” “Haechan, I love you, but I’m not singing with 127.”

Soon enough he convinced SM to bring you wherever he went so now you’re with the boys. All. The. Time.

“You’re my new assistant, Y/N. I demand a bottle of water.” “Kiss my ass, Haechan”

SEXY time with Haechan ooooooo chile

He likes to lift you up and hold you against the wall and kiss your neck.

Or even doggy style. Haechan just loves the view from the back.

Whenever he hits it from the back, he digs his fingers right at the bottom of your back. Or even grabs your shoulders to go in deeper.

You only know when he’s close when his body starts slowing down and you feel his body jerk.

“I wanna nut in you so badly, Y/N!” “Well don’t do that.”

Eventually he nutted in you and you had to take a plan B. So that’s that

“I told you not to do that to me, babe.” “I couldn’t just hold it back. It came out.”

After 10 months of dating, he bought you a promise ring. Seems quick but he KNEW it was meant to be. He’s not letting you go; no matter what.

“Soon, I’m gonna turn that ring into an engagement ring.” Haechan smiles

Jaemin:

I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone more affectionate than Na Jaemin

He’s such a loving boyfriend like super loving

Before you would go to work, he would pack your lunch and make sure to add little hearts and notes in your lunch-bag

His little notes would say something like: “I love you so much my honey bear,” “Have an amazing day at work. DONT overwork yourself.”

LITERALLY SO AFFECTIONATE

If you went somewhere without him, he would be a little offended but would end his disagreement w/ a “text me when you get there. I love you.”

and holy fuck if you did NOT text him, he’d lose his mind

you guys have each other’s locations

THATS WHEN YOU KNOW ITS REAL AND LEGIT

when Jisung was around, it was literally a competition for whoever gets Jaemin first.

Jaemin would occasionally pick Jisung over you. He’s fake and it shows

“where’s all the love and attention I need?” You call out.

“Baby, you have to wait your turn.” -Jaemin

when you guys argued, he would literally feel so guilty. especially if you had reasons to be pissed off.

like you would have receipts and he’d just cry. not to play victim, but because he wouldn’t ever want to hurt you emotionally, or physically.

“I’m really sorry...I promise I won’t do it again.”

he made it up by kissing you endlessly.

sexy time with Jaemin was everything you desired it to be

little comments in-between sex like: “i love you princess,” or “do i make you feel good?” 

UGH WE LOVE TO SEE IT

okay but Jaemin is more of the submissive type. he rarely gets dominant with you.

“i’m tired of riding you jaemin. my legs hurt.” “don’t worry, babe. lay down.”

like he KNOWS how to put it down

like he knows what he be doing too like wtf man

Jaemin makes dinner practically every night. this man is never not cooking.

“do you want pork or soup tonight?” “how about pork IN the soup?” “Y/N, I love your thinking.”

HE EVEN MAKES SURE YOU HAVE A NAPKIN ON YOUR LAP SO YOU DON’T SPILL ANYTHING HOT ON YOURSELF

Jaemin as your boyfriend>>>>>>anything else

Chenle:

HE IS SOOOO LOVING!!!!!!!

Chenle likes to wake you up with breakfast in bed

even though sometimes he can burn the food or miss an ingredient

“how does it taste, baby girl?” you smiled and kissed him

“I LOVE IT!”

Chenle was very very giving

he would always buy you something (RICH CHENLE CHECK)

little trips to the mall, coffee shops, jewelry stores

“babe do you want this?” “Chenle, I don’t need-” “Grab it. I’ll get it for you”

he brags to the dreamies about you ALLLLLL THEEEEEE TIMEEEEE

“you see Y/N as my lock-screen? isn’t she so frickn beautiful!”

“Chenle, you’ve mentioned Y/N about a hundred times” -Haechan

“And I don’t regret it.”

if you guys are far away from each other he’ll always ft you. there’s never not one day he’s not talking to you

“holy shit. I miss you so much. I’m going insane!” “Chenle, it’s just three more weeks.” “I can’t even go 3 minutes without thinking about you.”

since you guys have a studio apartment together in South Korea, he does surprise pop up visits

he’ll literally be sitting on the couch and scare the shit out of you

“Chenle, you didn’t tell me when you were gonna be home!” “I thought I’d surprise you when you come home from work.”

When he came home, you guys made love. Like he was holding it in for YEARS!!!

Chenle is rough af when the times right. Like especially when he hasn’t seen you in so long.

“Tell me when to slow down. I don’t wanna hurt you.” He whispers in your ear

He likes to kiss your neck and leave hickies when he’s on top. HE ENJOYS LEAVING MARKS ON YOU

He’s very demanding

“Tell me you love me. Tell me, Y/N. Say it, baby.”

Sometimes he gets tired and makes you ride him. And when you slow down, he grabs the fUCK OUT OF YOUR HIPS

“Chenle, I cant go any faster. My thighs hurt.” “Here let me help you.” AND BOOM. HES ON BEAST MODE

As soon as you guys finish, he cuddles you so hard and rubs your booty. He doesn’t care to put boxers on after sex because he’s just so comfortable

“That was so amazing. When’s the last time we’ve done something that well together?” “Chenle, I don’t know. You’ve been gone for 3 months.”

“Yeah but how’d you get so well.” “Chenle what?!”😭😭

If you guys rest long enough; he goes for round two. There’s nothing holding this kid back. HE WILL FUCK THE SHIT OUT OF YOU BC HE MISSED YOU

If you guys ever have small arguments it would literally be for five minutes and boom. You guys are best friends????

he hates arguing with you because he feels it’s a “waste of time” and it “emotionally hurts the relationship”

which he’s not wrong because who would want their relationship ruined on stupid arguments

“Y/N quit ignoring me and make out with me.”

This KIDS ALWAYS IN THE MOOD FOR YOU

he’s just never around you anymore so it’s just a bunch of orgasms built up

Chenle is awesome in all the right ways. This kid is the best boyfriend.

Jisung:

I’m pretty sure Jisung has told you and other people hundreds of times he’s gonna marry you.

“you have no idea how much I fucking I adore you, Y/N.”

yeah he’s the baby of the group, but you’re HIS baby.

“Jagi! You have to eat something! I’m not letting you go anywhere til you eat!”

he’s very very caring. sometimes he doesn’t show it in a talking way, but through his actions; it speaks so much louder.

Jisung can be a little awkward sometimes. especially around the members.

If you were to kiss him when the dreamers were there, he would get super red and would be on hush mode.

“Jagiiiii~ You aren’t supposed to do that. You know how I feel.” “But you and I both know how much you love it.” You smiled

when he first met your family, he was very scared. I mean like sweating through his dress shirt scared.

“Jisung, baby. they’re gonna like you a lot, okay? Don’t be so nervous.” “Yeah, but what if they ask me a question and I don’t respond? Imagine if your dad asks me what my intentions are with you? What the fuck am I gonna say?”

DONT WORRY. HE KNOWS WHAT TO SAY HES JUST SCARED AF I-

he literally shakes when he meets your mom but not your dad???

after he met the fam, they loved him a lot

Jisung is the sweetest person how can anyone NOT love him. like cmon

when you guys came out to the public, he took you E V E R Y W H E R E

and i mean everywhere

You were his date to music awards, debut stages, game/talk shows, etc.

Jisung loved bringing you everywhere with him. He says it makes him feel safe and at home every time he’s with you

(i wish someone felt that way about me. ima cry)

(this next part im NOT getting into detail. ik how lots of you feel about baby Jisung therefore it’ll be not so r-rated)

love making with Jisung is the softest thing ever.

before he does ANYTHING to your body, he ALWAYS makes sure you’re okay with it.

“Baby, you know I’ll always put your feelings first. I love you.”

He wasn’t rough(unless you asked or begged) he was always gentle

whenever he was on top, he liked to bury his face into your neck and give you neck kisses and soft nip at your ear

whenever you rode him, he’d just grab your hips and does the work for you. he knows how tiring it can be for your thighs so he goes all out by helping

his soft mOANS ARE TO DIE FOR. like literally he lets loose when it’s private time

moral of the story; find yourself a Jisung bc you won’t regret it.

----

It’s been WAY too long since I posted. I’ve been working full-time at my job now and saving up for a car ! Im super excited for myself guys omgggg. I missed you guys so so much

xoxo Jay

[bungou-stray-dingus]

ah I reaaaally liked the post!Thank you so muuuuch!Actually if you are comfortable to write chuuya,dazai and mori with their lovely s/o who is jealous 🥺💗

Chuuya

It didn’t matter how much he told you he loved you, how much he doted over you, how much he absolutely adored you, none of that mattered.

You trusted him with your life and your heart, and you knew he would never purposely hurt you or try to upset you. It’s not like he talked to those girls at the bar to piss you off, he didn’t exactly know how charming he was when he flashed that smile to them and they almost fell off the barstool after swooning.

Even if he didn’t know, that didn’t mean that you weren’t upset about it. Especially when the females that weren’t able to keep their hands to themselves were skimpily clad in the most revealing short dresses with a neckline so low that they might as well just be wearing a bra out in public. Sure, he’d brush their hands away or move back before they were even able to brush their heavily manicured fingers across his chest or face. It didn’t seem to make you feel any better though.

You’d stand off to the side and watch what was going on, your whole body trembling with agitation, a pang of nausea would hit every time he’d smile at them or when the girl would lean too close, her lips barely brushing against his ear. That’s when he’d excuse himself, swigging back the last of his wine before getting up, his eyes scanning the room until he found you standing against the wall next to the door.

“Are you not having fun?” He asked when he finally made it through the crowd of people standing around. You shrugged, staring down at your feet. “Do you want to go home?”

“You can stay here. I’m sure those girls at the bar are waiting for you.” Your eyes shot over to where they were sitting, staring over in yours and Chuuya’s direction.

“Them?” He looked over to them, his nose scrunching up in disgust. “They are nothing compared to you.”

“You didn’t seem to mind them trying to touch you.” You mumbled, your eyes not moving from the girls, their eyes were like daggers, thrown straight towards you.

“I guess you couldn’t hear me telling them to stop. You couldn’t hear me telling them that I have a girlfriend. You don’t need to be jealous of them, babe.” He tucked a lose strand of hair behind your ear. You bit your cheek, finally pulling your eyes away from the girls to look at him.

“I’m not jealous.” You grumbled, and he could only laugh, draping his arm over your shoulder as he lead you out the door into the busy streets of Yokohama.

“I don’t mind. You’re quite sexy when you get all worked up. I guess I’ll just have to ease your mind when we get home.”

Dazai

No matter how many times it happened, you still couldn’t keep yourself from becoming agitated when the girls around the city flocked to YOUR boyfriend. It was even worse when they seemed to completely ignore the fact that you were holding his hand, walking right next to him, they still circled around him, flourishing him with compliments of how attractive he was, how he would look great without all those clothes on, how he should come back to their place, handing him their phone numbers... they just didn’t seem to care.

He and you were strolling through the park one afternoon, it was mid-spring, finally warm enough to take walks and enjoy the sun. You were enjoying the time you had with him, you missed him terribly when he was at work, and he was finally able to spend an entire day with you. Everything was perfect, at least it was, until you heard the first shrill voice call out his name. Then, everyone came running. They broke your hold on his hand, completely blocking him from your view.

Usually you would stand around and wait for them to go away, but this was just too much. You shouldn’t have to fight for the attention of your own boyfriend, thats ridiculous. So you started walking, if he wanted to waste the one day you had together appeasing his fans than that’s up to him, but you wouldn’t let a perfect day go to waste, you can enjoy it by yourself.

You found a nice spot, it was pretty secluded, and you set your purse down on the ground and laid your head down on it, staring up at the sky where fluffy white clouds drifted by. The only sound was the slight breeze rustling the leaves of the trees and the occasional bird chirping and.... “Y/N! Sweetheart!?” Dazai.

You sat up and saw him running up the slight incline toward you. He was panting by the time he made it to where you were sitting. “I’ve been looking for you. Why did you leave me?” He said between heavy breaths.

“I didn’t want to get in the way of your fan base.” You were picking strands of grass out of the ground, wrapping them around your finger before tossing them to the side.

He sighed before plopping down on the ground next to you, grabbing your hand and placing it on his lap. “You’re upset.”

“You noticed?” You snapped. “This was supposed to be our day, Dazai.”

“It still is our day.” He ran his thumb over your knuckles, trying to calm you.

“I don’t want to share you with them.” You looked up to him, your bottom lip jutted out.

“You’re so jealous, I could just kiss you.” He gave you a cheeky smile and you rolled your eyes at him.

“I am not jealous. I just don’t like them.” You mumbled, pulling your hand out from under his.

“You’re definitely jealous.” He crooned the words, poking your cheeks as he said it.

“Shush.” You grumbled and he placed his hands on your cheeks, making you look at him. He chuckled at your annoyed look before kissing you.

“My precious little princess, what am I going to do with you?” He whispered, you felt the breath of his words against your lips.

“You could kiss me again....”

He pulled you onto his lap, his kiss was harder this time, he was all yours. If any of those girls were around right now, they wouldn’t dare to bother him.

Mori

The moon sat high in the sky, illuminating the city below. It was a perfect night, one that was supposed to be spent out at dinner with Mori. Instead you were in his office, babysitting Elise. He was out with a client, a beautiful young woman with long blonde hair that ran down her back in gorgeous waves. She always wore pencil skirts that accentuated her slender long legs. She made you so self conscious, and he had been spending a lot of time with her recently, always leaving you at headquarters too late, you were asleep by the time he came back.

“Y/N you’re not playing right!” Elises shrill voice pulled you from your self deprecating thoughts. You shook your head and put on a fake smile for her.

“Sorry Elise, alright, do it again.” You were playing charades, and she was obviously acting like a ballerina, but she hated when you answered right on the first try so you threw out random wrong answers just to keep her happy.

The large office door swung open and Mori walked in, a wide smile on his face when he saw his two favorite girls getting along. “Look at this beautiful ballerina!” He called out and Elise ran to his open arms.

“How was your meeting?” You asked and he looked so smug, you hated that you didn’t know what was going on.

“It went great, the client is satisfied and my work is done.” He said, holding Elises hand as he walked toward you. “How was your evening with my dear Elise?”

“It was great, Elise is satisfied and my work is done.” You mocked him, his eyes glinted with a hint of anger at your tone. You pushed yourself up off the floor and grabbed your bag off his desk. “I’ll be heading out now. Goodnight Elise. Mori.” You nodded in his direction, making your way to the door.

He grabbed your arm and pulled you back to him, his grip was tight, but not painful. “Is there a problem?” He asked, his voice low and slightly menacing. It sent a shiver through your body. You never understood why people were scared of him, but now you could see it.

“No. I just want to go home.” You muttered, and he pulled you against him, his hand holding your head against his chest.

“I don’t like lying, dear. You know that.” The words were spoken through his teeth. He didn’t like when you wasted his time over stupid little things.

“Your client....”

“Yes, what about her?” His teeth were unclenched but you could still hear the agitation in his voice.

“She’s so pretty and you spend so much time with her and what if you like her more than me because she’s prettier than me and I’m just me and boring and not perfect like she is.” The words ran out of your mouth like a waterfall. He took a step back so he could look at you, holding you at arms length. He was shaking his head, a low chuckle escaped his lips.

“My jealous kitten, you make me feel so special that you’d get upset about such minuscule things. You have no reason though. You’re my only girl.” He said, running his hands up and down your arms.

“HEEEEEY!” Elises voice rang through the room and Mori turned to look at her sheepishly.

“I’m sorry Elise, dear. You’re my girl too.” She huffed and went back to drawing. He sighed and turned back to face you, his smile was warmer now, it reached his eyes. “But you, you’ll always be my girl. Always.”

[deargina9]

4th Grade

Dear Gina,

What a change from Union City right? This place looks so weird. Going from the city to the “country” huh? I’m sorry you had to leave your friends. You’re going to miss them dearly, I know. But guess what? You are going to be just fine little one. You don't have to deal with your sister using you for sensual expiraments. Thats what it was. She was at the age when you get curious. She didn't realize the damage she was causing and neither do you. You're too young to understand, thank God. But forgive her when you can.

You’ve got this new big house, huge backyard, and a new town to explore in with new friends! It’s your first day in summer school. The girl with the blond hair is nice to you. She is your age and in the same class! You met a new friend just in a matter of a few days! Look how friendly you are sweet girl. She seems to be the popular one in your class so maybe if you act a little like her you’ll be popular to and not the new kid in school.

First day of school and you think, "wow ...no one in my class looks like me...." Eh, that's okay! The class is mostly white and you're a beautiful black princess. Besides, mom says you love everyone no matter what, right? Picture day! Your hair is all nice with those beautiful braids. A girl in class is nice enough to let you wear a butterfly barrette in your hair just like she's doing! Wasn't that so sweet and nice of her to share?

Hmm..those two boys aren't very nice to you are they? They said your hair looks like Predator from those action movies mom won't let you watch. It really hurt and made you feel badly about yourself, didn't it sweetheart? It hurts because they gave a name to the differences in our physical appearance. Giving it a name made it more real to you that people actually view you differently from them.

Guess what my little chick-a-dee? You don't have to give them that power! No one can make you feel less of a person except you. You get to choose to be proud of everything you are, inside AND out! You are one special little girl who is going to do amazing things when you grow up. To make this world a better place. HOW COOL IS THAT!? Yes, they teased your hair but your hair DOES NOT DEFINE YOU, little one. Long, short, curly, straight, on your head, or even completely off...whatever your hair is doing that day doesn't control what's in your heart or how you feel about the world. That's all inside of you and can never be cut out or go away. I set the positive and healing intention that these words will now and forever be in your memeory. Your are perfect just the way God made you! YOU ARE SO LOVED!

I intend to bring my inner child and all her painful wounds and experiences back into union with my NOW self. I AM SO LOVED! I am so grateful for this life lesson. It is done.

[mikenewtonhateblog]

My oc’s aka too long of a gd post

The “BL” Crew (does not stand for boys love I’m just a moron who made that abbreviation before knowing what it stands for). My main crew and main series, a lot is a big WIP right now as I’m slowly redoing the first book and all the lore. Why? I love torture. Book is fantasy type but I won’t specify what.

Lacie, the protagonist. God tier idiot, bisexual bipolar depressed MESS, insomniac, former theater kid, doesn’t know what she wants out of life but currently it is not This(plot of book). Hot headed, impulsive, crude, rude, Mommy IssuesTM, would rather be taking a nap right now, rules are made to be broken, absolutely fucking FERAL, more bags under her eyes than the airport lost and found. 5’5, 130lbs, Aries, age 18, white as shit like literally the whitest human you have ever seen, strawberry blonde hair in a 2011 Hayley Willaims haircut with long bangs, the darkest brown eyes you’ve ever seen that stare directly into your soul. Lanky, no curves, body of a 12 year old boy but works out so she can and will kick your ass and thats a threat. Not human?

Josh. Soft boy, smart, Lacie’s cousin and only friend for like the first 18 years of her life, autistic anxious mess who’s special interest is anchient egyptian history, is in honors classes, despises math, passes out when his girlfriend looks too cute, just needs a hug. Can eat a whole carton of easy mac if left alone, whole wardobe is the same outfit just different colors/hoodies, sensory issues, seriously can someone give this guy a hug. 5’9, 150lbs, Pisces, age 18, mixed (half whatever flavor of white Lacie’s family is [they don’t even know its just some scandanavian shit and irish], and half mexican on his mom’s side), medium olive skin with freckles and moles, dark chocolate brown hair that’s a bit of a 2009 Beiber cut, warm brown eyes, not beefy, a lil thicc and self concious about it but squishy boys are GOOD. Gets bit by a werewolf so now he is one his mood on it is “thats a lot to unpack but let’s just throw the whole suitcase away”.

Zander. There is not one braincell in this man, himbo KING, pansexual dumbass with undiagnosed ADHD, no impulse control, head empty and full at the same time, PTSD, his fashion sense should be an actual crime, gets in fights to feel something, basic requirements for him to be attracted to you: kick his ass. Drinks his respect women juice, sees a folding table and must immediately launch himself on it, chaotic, cannot drive a car and will not, food aggression and eats enough for 3 people but never gains weight which is ILLEGAL, him and Lacie may be a couple.....but in this house we stan slow burn, he talks in caps and every sentence either ends with a question mark or exclaimation point, likes romcoms. 6’2, 190lbs, Sagittarius, age 19, austrailian roots and has the accent but is from [REDACTED FOR STORY REASONS], white, dorito shaped with long legs, blueish black hair that’s long and messy, dark navy eyes that match his hair, bigass neck scar from [REDACTED]. Not human

Peter. Gay dad friend who is TIRED of having to be in charge of a bunch of teenagers, only one with full functioning braincells, lowkey a genius who loves engineering, mixes magical technology with human technology because he likes to play god, is he ever sober? No one knows, will kill for a bottle of single malt, his fashion sense? Tastefully expensive suits perfectly tailored. Likes building his own weapons that no one else knows how to even use, generally non-threatening but can get scary if needed. 6’4, 140lbs string bean man, Scorpio, age 179 but looks early 30s, I know I said Lacie is the whitest human but he’s even paler like a literal sheet of paper with scandanavian roots/ancestors were vikings or some shit, blonde hair styled like 2013 Brendon Urie lmfao, light crystal blue eyes. He’s a vampire and was born one.

Danielle. Tiny, sweet, queen of girls supporting girls, comments on all her friends instagram posts with 20 emojis, LOVES fashion and has a wardrobe that would make anyone jealous, oozes feminine energy, only child and parents are in love still, gets exactly 8 hours of sleep each night and wakes up looking like a disney princess. Just because she is small and cute doesn’t mean you should underestimate her she WILL fuck your shit up. Quiet when angey which is terrifying. Josh is her bf and she loves him so much but also loves teashing the shit out of him. Legally cannot cuss, polite, used her high heels as a weapon once, speaks like 5 languages because studying them is her hobby, gardens, hugs everyone. 5’0, 110, Taurus, age 18, mixed (half french-american, half Korean-american), glowy skin always, PETITE frame aka the friend everyone can pick up when they hug, long past her waist curly brown hair, bright green eyes. She’s not fully human as she has fae blood in her and this gives her the ability to talk to and control plants. Flower crowns for everyone

Becca. Theater kid who would die to sing in Wicked and has the vocal range to do so, cannot wait to graduate and go to her dream college which she got into and a scholarship, closeted lesbian bc her whole giant family is extremely catholic and she feels like not dealing with it, “no boys allowed in bedroom” rule is her favorite joke, chill, middle child of 5 siblings and just wants some peace and quiet for ONCE. Her fashion sense is “I’m dropping subtle hints I’m gay but only to other gays”, has a black belt and took self defense classes. 5’6, 145lbs, Virgo, age 18, Latina (cuban and mexican mix), darker brown skin with light freckles over her nose, athletic build, eyebrows on POINT, bright caramel eyes, short light brown hair cut in a bob, has a tiny nose stud, always wears a blue friendship bracelet her gf made her. Human

Anika. Calling her a bitch/slut is a compliment, bisexual, a bit of a mean girl but she grows out of it give her time!!! Is always Too Much, the horny friend, favorite color is red so thats almost all of her outfits, loves to show off her body as much as she can because she’s hot and knows it and thrives in her own confidence. Her mom is literally like Regina George’s mom from Mean Girls but married a rich man 20 years older than her, Anika doesn’t know her bio dad but thats fine neither does her mom and her step dad is nice and does his best to be a dad. Becca’s gf, always hanging out at her home so Becca can get some quiet because Anika’s an only child and has a pool. 5’9, 135lbs, Gemini, age 18, white, long layered dark reddish brown hair, teal-blue eyes, swimmers body type (I normally do not mention bust size but she would want the internet to know she was blessed with big bahoogles so there you go), can sprint in heels. Half mermaid (boy was that a surprise considering her mom doesn’t know who her father is LOL)

Rex. Nb uses they/them he/him pronouns but honestly will respond to any, goth lite, only attracted to men and ace, can read minds so knows all your secrets, mischevious little shit, great friends with Zander and enjoys his dumbass thoughts and that he’s basically a human version of Jackass, wears too many rings, goth boots for kicking and fashion babey, always has the freshest memes and will not hesitate to roast in the group chat, hangs with the girls most of the time. Chaos god who loves making art, be gay do crime, skateboard and spraypaint. 5’8”, 165lbs, Leo, age 18, Native American, masculine frame, dark brown skin, blue eyes, firetruck red shoulder length hair that’s usually in a ponytail, knock-off gucci sunglasses just for judging their friends. Has magic in their blood so not entirely human and can cast spells and shit (don’t roast me its a wip and I’m doing my research)

Sam. Boho goddess, aromantic, makeup and nails are always instagram worthy, quiet and stoic type but losens up around close friends, Rex is her best friend, has some trauma and doesn’t want to talk about it, emotionally numbed out a bit and wants to purely vibe. Has seen some of the worst parts of humanity and wishes she hadn’t, finds no point in being bitter or resentful though because that won’t change anything, loves cats and once she moves out shes adopting one or three. Has wine aunt energy. 5’4, 200lbs PLUS SIZE QUEEN, Scorpio, age 18, Filipino (her parents are immigrants fun fact!), really olive skin sometimes has a grey/green tinge to it, dark brown almost black shoulder length hair, gold-hazel eyes. Sam’s the victim of a family curse that requires her to consume human hearts to survive, she can transform into a pretty scary looking being and uses this curse to hunt down pedoph*les, r*pists, murderers, and abusers. The less often she feeds the less human she looks, hence the constant grey/green tinge to her skin. 

Andy. Baby of the group, must be protected at all costs, 100% didn’t sign up to be in a friendgroup of 90% monsters but highkey loves it, trans, bi, anxiety MAXED, just wants to draw comics and cosplay spiderman, has to babysit his two younger sisters a lot because his parents are....not great, and as a result now knows all the lines to Tangled and The Little Mermaid. Big nerd energy, has to draw on everything including homework, gets inspiration for comics from his friends, awkward and socially anxious, drinks way too much tea and will accidentally steal your pens. Fears include: crowds, thunder, tall angry men, tiny spaces. Just trying his best. 5’2, 100lbs BEANPOLE BOY, Leo, age 16, white (irish and scottish roots), freckles absolutely EVERYWHERE, orangey red hair thats in desperate need of a haircut, chocolate brown eyes, braces, chronic nail biter. Human and kinda wishes he wasn’t.

That’s it for now if you read all this bless u thank u here is my whole heart. Please no discourse, literally these are fictional people I’ll never publish the books they go to.

[wistfulcynic]

Another Brick In The Wall, Chapter 12

a/n: This one is short and sweet, just a little bit of fluff and plot development. It was going to be longer, but I decided to split it and I think you’ll understand why... 

Summary: Emma Swan, sheriff’s daughter, mayor’s niece, quarterback’s girlfriend, is the undisputed princess of Storybrooke High. She is smart and confident and used to getting what she wants. What she wants is Killian Jones, the new boy in school. But Killian is not easily manipulated, and reluctant to allow the dark secrets in his past to touch the girl he is rapidly falling in love with. Rating: T Read it on AO3: Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12

Tags for: @darkcolinodonorgasm @jennjenn615 @hollyethecurious @resident-of-storybrooke @kmomof4 @bonbonpirate

Chapter 12: 

“Swan, I have somthing to discuss with you,” said Killian one lunchtime at the beginning of April. They were sitting outside, enjoying an early spring day that was both bright and warm; fortunately so, as neither of them was quite ready to return to the library at lunch. Emma still turned pink whenever she saw Miss French, and frankly the quiet and solitude there offered too much temptation to repeat the activities that had embarrassed them in front of her in the first place. Better to stay away from the library, and out in public. 

“That sounds ominous,” Emma replied.  

“I hope not, but it is serious. You remember I told you that I had a provisional place to study at Oxford, that I could start there next year if I got high enough AP scores?”

“Yeah,” she replied, ignoring the twist in her belly at the thought of him being so far away. They could survive a few years long-distance, she knew, she had complete faith in the strength of their relationship, but that didn’t mean she was looking forward to it. An ocean between them meant months of not seeing Killian except for his face on a screen, months of not being able to touch or hold or kiss him. As happy as they had been together over the past few weeks, that future separation loomed large and depressing.   

“Well, a few months ago Miss French suggested that maybe I might be able to stay here, in the US I mean, for university. ‘College,’ I suppose I should call it.” 

“Really?”

“Yeah. She contacted the Oxford tutor I’d been planning to work with, and he contacted a colleage of his at Harvard, and well, the gist of the tale is that they’ve offered me the same deal. Get the AP scores and I can start there next year.” 

“At Harvard?”

“Yeah.” 

“Thats— that’s fantastic!” Emma threw her arms around them, oblivious to the other students in the yard, overwhelmed by the relief and happiness surging through her.

“I’m pleased with it.” Killian smiled, returning her hug and kissing her temple as she snuggled against him, her head on his shoulder. “There is a condition, though,” he continued, “and that is for me to return to Oxford for any graduate degrees, which honestly would be my preference regardless. Oxford is really the best place to study languages on an advanced level. But the more I think about it the more I realise I’d quite like to go to an American college. At British universities you focus only on your chosen subject, but I’d like the chance to explore some other subjects besides languages.” He thought for a moment. “My maths and physics classes here have been really interesting, maybe I’ll try engineering. Or architecture. Having a hand in building something would be amazing.” 

His eyes were bright with enthusiasm, his expression open and eager, and as she listened to him she felt a rush of pure love. He was such a nerd. Oh, he hid it well behind his smart mouth and occasionally almost Brontë-level moodiness, but underneath all that he was passionately devoted to his interests, and in the end wasn’t that what made a nerd?

“Did I tell you I got into Columbia?” she asked casually. 

“Architecture might be something I could— wait, what?” 

She grinned at his delighted expression. “Got the email last week. Off the wait list and in. Mom’s thrilled, of course, and taking all the credit. Says I’m a ‘legacy.’”

“That’s nonsense, love it was all you. You’re brilliant, and amazing.” His voice brimmed with pride. 

Emma resisted the urge to point out that if anyone was brilliant and amazing it was the seventeen year old who’d secured a special deal to go to Harvard. But that would only embarrass him, and there were more important matters to discuss. “You know what this means, right?” she said eagerly. “With me in New York and you in Boston we’ll only be a few hours away on the train. We could see each other every few weeks.” 

“I’ll confess that this was not a minor factor in my decision to stay here for school,” he replied. “The idea of being an ocean away from you was not one I cared to contemplate.” 

“Me neither. Oh, this is incredible, babe, I’m so happy.” 

“As am I, love.” 

And she could see that he meant it. Although his dark cloud still sometimes fell, although the shadows occasionally still lurked behind his eyes, he was happy. They were happy, together. And she wanted more people to have a chance at what they had. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Emma Swan had always known, somewhere in the recesses of her mind, that she had what any objective observer would consider a charmed life. She had been raised by loving parents in a town where everyone knew her and cared for her, and she had grown up smart and athletic, confident and charming,  pretty and popular. The circumstances of her life combined with her natural gifts had always reliably ensured that she didn’t have to work too hard for anything, and that the work she did do produced satisfactory results. She had good grades, tons of friends, and had never failed at anything she’d tried to do. 

Not that she didn’t also have her flaws. As much as she was kind, considerate, and determined, she was also complacent, shielded by privilege, stubborn, and self-satisfied in the way that only a pretty, pampered girl can be. As a result she had never really examined anything about herself or her life, never questioned her place in the world or challenged the expectations placed on her. She had led her clique, become a cheerleader, dated Neal, all because everyone else seemed to expect it, and she’d had no reason to object. She’d had no reason to ask herself if those things were actually what she wanted or simply what other people wanted for her, figuring that it didn’t really matter, everything would work out in the end. Why wouldn’t it? She was Emma Swan, after all. Things always worked out for her.

All that had changed when she’d met Killian. For the first time in her life Emma had wanted something she couldn’t have, for the first time she had found herself truly empathising with another person, putting herself in his shoes, feeling the pain that he felt. She had made the decision to put his needs first, the hardest decision of her young life, and that had changed her. Killian had changed her. By not obediently falling into line, by making her work for his trust and friendship, by calling her out for what she was and making her see that there were things in this world that didn’t simply fall into her lap because she was Emma Swan, Killian had challenged her preconceptions, broadened her horizons and made her take a hard look herself and her life, for the very first time. 

She wasn’t entirely sure she liked what she saw. It astonished her now to think, for instance, about how she’d allowed Neal to treat her, how she’d just accepted his microaggressions and petty digs like they were something normal and to be expected. She had buried her reservations, her distaste, her outright dislike of him, because of what other people had thought. Because the head cheerleader dated the quarterback, that was just how things were done, and the lack of chemistry, common interests, even basic compatibility between herself and Neal made no difference. She had come to realise, slowly and painfully, that many of things she’d thought she wanted, the things that had always come so easily to her, were perhaps not what she really wanted at all. That perhaps the things she really wanted would be harder to obtain. Like Killian. Like the future she was beginning to envision with him. 

The one thing that Emma had always known was what she wanted to do with her life was to help people, to find something she could do that would make other people’s lives better. Like her father the law enforcer, like her mother the teacher. They were leaders and guides and she admired them, wanted to be like them. But she saw now through her newly opened eyes that if she wanted to make a real difference she couldn’t live the rest of her life in a small town surrounded by people who were basically just like her. Killian had made her see that there was a great wide world beyond Storybrooke, a world full of people whose lives and experiences she couldn’t even begin to fathom. If she wanted to help them she would need to understand them, and to understand them she would need to meet them, to see firsthand what they were dealing with. 

Her parents expected her to follow the same path they had taken. And she intended to, if not quite in the way they anticipated. 

“Forensic psychology,” she said firmly, ignoring her mother’s worried brow and her father’s stern concern. “That’s what I want to do. I want to help victims of crimes, help people who suffered trauma to get their lives back, like Dr Hopper did with Killian. I’ve been thinking about it for a long time but now I’m sure. That’s what I’m going to study.” 

“But that’s… that’s years of school, isn’t it?” said Snow. “That’s advanced degrees.” 

“You have a master’s degree, Mom!” 

“Which I did online from home after working for several years! You’re talking about a PhD, that’s at least an eight year commitment before you can even get started! Do you really want to be away from Storybrooke for eight years?” 

“Yeah,” said Emma, bracing herself. “About that.” 

“About what?” asked Snow, in a voice that suggested she already knew. 

“I don’t think I’ll be coming back to live in Storybrooke anytime soon.” 

Snow closed her eyes and sighed. Somehow she’d known this was coming. 

“If I want to really help people I have to live somewhere where people need help,” said Emma. “And no offense, Dad, but SB isn’t exactly a hotbed of violent crime.” 

“Violent crime,” echoed Snow faintly. David remained silent, his arms crossed over his chest. 

“Plus, Killian wants to be a linguist, and that’s not really an in-demand job here either.” 

“Is Killian behind this decision, then?” asked Snow sharply.

“Well, he is, but probably not in the way you think. He’d be happy to live anywhere I wanted. If I wanted to stay here he would find something to do.” 

“Well, then, I don’t see any reason—”

“But that’s not what I want, Mom! I don’t want to hold Killian back, I don’t want to hold myself back. And I don’t want to live forever in the small town I grew up in.” 

“But— you never said before—”

“I never actually thought about it before. But now I have and I know what I want. I want to see how other people live, and I want to learn about other ways of thinking. I don’t just want to be complacent in my little box of other people’s expectations. I want to challenge myself and find out what I’m really made of.” 

“Oh, Emma,” Snow sighed, recognising the stubborn set of her daughter’s jaw and realising that all her plans for Emma’s life were about to go up in smoke. “David, talk to her!”

David had sat silently throughout the discussion, and he considered his words carefully now before he spoke. “I’m proud of you, Emma,” he said finally. 

“David!” 

“You know that I will always support any decision you make,” David continued, placing a calming hand on Snow’s knee. “We’ve tried to raise you to make good ones, and I trust your judgement. But I admit I never expected you to make a decision like this, and I could not be more proud. You’ve chosen a path that will be hard, harder than many alternative paths you could have gone for. But I think it will be a rewarding, and more importantly a worthwhile one.” 

“But David, everything we’ve worked to give her!” cried Snow.

“We worked to give her everything we could so that she would have the freedom to live her life as she wished to,” said David. “That’s what she intends to do. We have to respect her choices, Snow.” 

Emma rose from where she had been curled up in an armchair and sat on her father’s lap, something she hadn’t done in years. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she squeezed him tightly and buried her face in his shoulder. 

“Thank you, Daddy,” she whispered. 

David squeezed her back. “I love you, Duckling,” he replied, turning his head to shoot his wife a significant look. “Snow?”

“Oh, you know I love you both,” said Snow, shifting on the sofa so she could embrace both husband and daughter. “I’d just hoped— But never mind, Emma, if this is your decision and you’re happy with it then I am happy for you.” 

Emma and David each put an arm around her, and the three of them sat that way for a long time, thinking about the future. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

One sunny afternoon in early May Killian and Emma were walking from Granny’s to the school to pick up Emma’s car which they’d left in the school lot after fencing club, preferring to walk to Granny’s and back in the warm sunshine. They walked arm-in-arm, their custom now, their strides perfectly matched and the silence between them easy and comfortable. Killian loved their comfortable silences; although when necessary he could talk with the best of them, he was not a person who was naturally inclined to a lot of noise and chatter. He preferred quiet more often than not, and always needed some peace after spending time in a noisy environment, even one he enjoyed like a concert or open mic, or a rowdy family dinner of the sort he and Emma seemed to find themselves at every weekend these days. He loved that they could just be together, just enjoy each other’s company without needing to fill the silence with talk. Her presence calmed his often turbulent mind, made him feel grounded and happy, and even better, content. He didn’t think he’d ever known simple contentment before in all his life and he treasured it.

Yet that afternoon the silence would have to be broken. 

“Swan,” he said. 

“Hmmm?” Emma was clearly still caught up in whatever thoughts she’d been thinking before he spoke. 

“What are you thinking about?” He was suddenly curious to know what had put that little smile on her face, and what he had to say could wait. 

“Just thinking about this summer. School’s going to be over soon. Do you think you’ll get a job?”

“I have one already. I’m going to be helping Liam with some work at the docks, and also it seems I’ll be tutoring your cousin Henry in maths.” 

“Yeah, he told me. Would you call that a real job, though?” 

“It’s real pay, Swan. Quite a bit of it, actually, your aunt is very determined for him to succeed. And hark at you, daughter of a teacher, thinking tutoring’s not a real job! What would your mother say?”

“Ha ha. I just meant it can’t be many hours.”

“Three per week, which I suppose isn’t many as far as jobs go but is at least two and a half more than Henry would prefer.”

“He’s such a smart kid, but hopeless at math. He’ll keep you on your toes.” 

“I’ll be prepared. I assume you’re asking me about this because you have a job of your own?”

“Yeah, I’m going to be working at the ice cream shop. They have extended summer hours and they get really busy. And my dad says I can shadow one of his deputies a couple of days a week. He says if I’m going to be working with law enforcers, even as a psychologist, I should know what they do from the ground up.” 

“That sounds like a solid plan.” 

“And it will leave plenty of time for us to do stuff together,” she said, pulling her arm from his so she could wrap it around his waist and lean her head on his shoulder. He draped his own arm around her waist, his hand casually on her hip, brushing a kiss over her hair as they continued to walk, their movements so in sync that their pace never faltered. Killian smiled to himself. As wonderful as the comfortable silence was, the casual intimacy might be even better. That he could touch her freely and she him was one of the great joys of his life. 

“I very much look forward to hearing about these summer activities that I can tell you’re planning, love, but I have a more immediate concern that we need to discuss.” 

“Oh? And what’s that?” 

“You have to promise not to laugh.” 

She was indignant. “Killian Jones, when have I ever laughed at you?”

“You laugh at me all the time!” 

“I laugh with you, which is not the same. You can’t blame me for laughing when you’re trying to be funny!” 

“All right, I suppose that’s fair. But this time—” 

“I promise not to laugh, Killian.”

He nodded. “Good. Well. Okay.” He drew a deep breath. “God, I feel like a right git asking this, these are words that I never in all my life thought I’d need to say, but… well, um…” 

“Spit it out, Jones, I’m losing my will to live here,” teased Emma, burying her grin in his shoulder. She was pretty sure she knew what was coming, and despite her promise was very tempted to laugh at him. After all his snarky comments about American high school clichés he was finally being forced to eat his words. 

“Are you really going to make me say it, Swan?”

“I absolutely am, and also I have no idea what you’re talking about. Did you have something you wanted to ask me?”

He groaned, and she swallowed a giggle. 

“Fine,” he grumbled, “though I think that if you really loved me you wouldn’t put me through this.” 

“Love is pain, babe, isn’t that what Fergie sang?”

“Another right git, so the quote seems apt. Okay, look. Emma. Will you— oh, God, I absolutely cannot say it!” 

“Yes you can, and you’d better or I’ll go with someone else! Surely you don’t think you’re the only one who’s asked me. Or hasn’t asked me, in your case.”

“Someone’s asked you to the prom behind my back?” he snarled, bristling in indignation. “Who? Tell me so I can flatten the bastard.” 

“Asked me to the what now?” She blinked at him, eyes wide and innocent.

The look on his face was priceless. “Bloody hell, I walked right into that one, didn’t I?” 

“For a smart guy you are so dumb sometimes. Just ask me, it’s not like you don’t know the answer.” 

He shot her a smirk that was second cousin to a leer. “I would never consider you a foregone conclusion, my darling.” 

“Just ask me, Killian!” 

“Argh! Fine! Emma, will you go to the prom with me?”

“Yes, of course I will. I thought you’d never ask. Like, literally, never.”

Further notes: Yes, we will see them go to the ball prom. Naturally. 

[jaydraws-tings]

Ohmtoonz ~Rainy Days~

(Im so sorry for the shoddy quality of this specific drabble. I was having a real tough time finishing anythinf with writing and figured why not end this one here. Thanks for reading and i hope ye enjoy)

It was rare Ryan truly ever had a bad day. Sure sometimes things could get annoying or something unfortunate would happen, but it never really was bad. Ryan was an optimist, always believing the day held something better, and it usually worked for him. Today however, was just not his day.

Ryan started his day bright and early, walked to his desk, and found out his recording software and most of his footage from the day previous was corrupted. Frustrated he decided to just sit back and glare at his screen, eventually calming himself and getting up to go get breakfast.

He was once again disappointed by there being absolutely no food. By this point the sky was beginning to darken (much to his disappointment) with a storm seeming to come from nowhere. Ryan sighed and as quietly as he could manage slipped out of the house. The walk to the supermarket seemed short and relaxing, allowing Ryan to clear his head. He breathed in the air that started to feel heavier, the rain would come down hard in time.

He quickly walked into the supermarket, got the few things he needed (eggs, milk, more coffee) and started the trek back home. The sky was dark and the air fell into a thick heavy silence. Ryan knew at that moment he fucked up. The first droplets caused Ryan to speed up his walking, a few minutes later a heavy rain had him sprinting to get under shelter. He felt out of breath as he barely made it under the porch of a strangers house.

Ryan was angry, soaking wet, hungry, had no footage, and had no idea what to do. He tried to fish in his pockets for his phone but came up empty handed. His phone had been left on his desk when he went out for some food. Meaning he had no way of calling anyone too. Ryan felt it all burn up in his chest. The weight of the day started to come down on him. Ryan as well as angry felt embarrassed. He felt weak and stupid. He buried his face in his hands to keep anyone (not that anyone would see) from seeing the tears slipping down his face.

“You alright there?” A nice southern voice shocked him out of his thoughts. Ryan straightened up and brushed the tears from his face, eventually turning to look up at the stranger leaning against the front door of the house he was taking refuge under.

“I’ll take that as a no.” The stranger came forward sitting beside Ryan, he let out a huff of breath as he plopped down on to the step next to him. “Do you usually do this?”

Ryan blinked at the question, feeling embarrassed at the stare lingering on him. “What do you mean?” The stranger gave a smirk, tilting his head slightly. “Walk in this type of weather?”

Ryan blushed and turned away, he knew that same stare was still on him. He sighed and ran a hand through his messy wet hair. “No.” He felt embarrassed at how flustered he was getting around this complete stranger. He could be an axe murderer for pete's sake! However, when looking back at the stranger he knew that wouldn't be right.

“Ah so today was an exception.” The cocky grin on the strangers face widened with another curious tilt of his head.

Ryan sighed and looked away, his eyes scanned the streets distractedly. He could feel his blush calming a little bit, but still could feel that bubbly nervousness in the pit of his stomach. “Not exactly. I uh, don't have a car and was hungry. My roommate, he has a tendency to steal my food and my stock was low.”

The stranger raised an eyebrow a smile stretching across his face. “Well I’m not sure if this rain is going to let up anytime soon. Wanna come in?”

Ryan looked over and found himself embarrassed. “Oh, I don't want to be a disturbance!” He scrambled up to his feet and waved his hand in a dismissive type of way. “Please don’t worry, I’ll be fine out here”

He was cut off by the strangers gentle chuckle. “It's fine. Don't worry yourself about it.” The stranger got up and extended a hand to Ryan. “I should have introduced myself earlier, sorry. My names Luke.”

Ryan looked up at the male, another warm blush moving across his face. He found himself at a loss for words for a few seconds. With a bit of hesitation he reached up and grabbed Luke's hand, allowing himself to get pulled up by him. “Ryan.”

The short stutter that accompanied his name made Ryan curse himself, especially when Luke seemed to grin a bit wider upon hearing it. “Well Ryan it's nice to meet you. Let's get you dried up and fed yeah?” Luke gave a closed eyed grin that made Ryans stomach flip. “Uh yeah sure.”

Luke's house was much cosier inside than it was outside. It was nice and warm, and Ryan noted the cat lying on the sofa that seemed to want to ignore both the men's presence. “Thats Princess. She's kind of an asshole.” Luke chuckled and walked over petting the cat with a fondness that made Ryan smile behind his hand. “She seems pretty cool to me.”

Luke let out a breathless laugh and turned to look at Ryan with a raised eyebrow. “Sure, just live with her than you'd get the whole experience.” He laughed, a smooth sounding laugh that made Ryan giggle. For a minute a peaceful silence landed between the two before Luke got up and clapped his hands. “Let's get you some new clothes.”

Luke had led Ryan to a restroom. He showed him how the shower worked before leaving him, returning with a new set of clothes. Ryan looked down with wide brown eyes opening his mouth to object but Luke stopped him with a wave of his hand. “Your clothes are wet and these are really the only thing I have that look like it'll fit you. I’ll put yours in the drier after you get out if you want?”

Ryan felt bad, his eyes watched  Luke with uncertainty but saw that Luke was determined. With a sigh he accepted grabbing the dry clothes. “Ok fine, but after they are dry I’ll give these back ok?” Luke grinned at him and nodded accepting it. After a minute he jumped and blushed.

“Oh uh, I’ll leave you be.” He backed away and waved awkwardly. Ryan waved back with a soft giggle and closed the door behind him.

The shower was nice and warm. His body relaxed under the water, his once tense muscles felt so much better. Ryan was conscious of the amount of self care products this stranger had. It was almost funny compared to his pitiful amount of things at his shared restroom.

Ryan did not allow himself to take his time though. He quickly showered and got out, wrapping a towel around his waist and stretched. He reached over wiping the foggy mirror. Ryan took in his messy rumpled appearance and grinned despite himself.

Ryan had to remind himself of where he was. He dried his body and grabbed at the clothes Luke had given him. The white button up shirt he had given him was too large over Ryan's body. He buttoned it up and tried his best to pull up the sleeves to a suitable length. The jeans Luke gave him was also too large but manageable. It at least allowed Ryan to tuck in the button up.

Ryan collected his wet clothes and bundled them together. He opened the door and the smell of bacon seemed to waft into the restroom. Ryan stepped out into the hall, walking down back to the livingroom and right to the scene of Luke cooking.

The southerner was focused on some bacon, his nose scrunched at the easy task. Alongside it was two plates of eggs. Ryan felt flattered at the scene. He cleared his throat and smiled at Lukes shocked gaze. “You didn't have to.” Ryan walked into the room and gestured to the plates. “I would have been fine. I've already been so much of a burden and, you really didn't have to.”

Luke shrugged and offered a plate to Ryan. “Take it as neighborly hospitality.” Ryan found himself grinning despite the worry. He walked over accepting the plate graciously. “Thank you.”

They both ate in comfortable silence. They didn't chat, merely enjoying each others company together. After they were done Luke took their plates (Ryan objected for probably the fifth time that evening but he was once again stopped by Luke) and washed them. Ryan chit chatted with him softly, getting to know the stranger bit by bit. He learned of his past, his friends and hobbies he had. They both shared an interest in games and Ryan wrote down his gamer tag for Luke so they could later possibly play with each other.

Their conversation in the kitchen turned to them both sitting in the living room. They both spoke easily with each other, seeming to be long time friends instead of people that met that day. The conversation turned to Ryan soon enough.

“So what do you do Ryan?” Ryan tilted his head, previously looking up to Luke's ceiling to glance over at Luke. “I uh. It's complicated.” Luke burst out laughing and looked over at Ry. “It can't be that bad. Come on.” Ryan puffed hi cheeks and turned away. “I uh. I film for youtube. Nothing too special just something on the side.” Ryan scratched his cheek. “Other than that I work at a nearby video store. It's interesting we get all sorts of customers.”

Luke smiled at Ryan encouragingly. “See that's not that bad.”

Ryan scoffed at Luke. “You cant talk. My roommate always makes fun of me.” Ryan blew a breath between his teeth.

“A real piece of work huh?” Ryan glanced o er confused at Luke's words. “Your roommate, he seems like such a swell guy."

Ryan chuckled softly. "You could say that." Ryan puffed a breath between his teeth. "Brings girls endlessly to the house, eats my things, uses my products, real good guy." He gave Luke a thumbs up with a fake cheery smile plastered on his face. The sarcasm practically dripping from his lips.

Luke burst out laughing, reaching over and patting Ryan on the shoulder. "Damn man. Must be hell to live with him."

Ryan chuckled looking down at his hands. "Yeah." He sighed softly. "If it weren't for him I guess I wouldn't of gotten stranded in the storm. This day in total has just been." A sigh blew from his lips as he leaned back again. "Amazing."

Ryan after a second looked up into Luke's chocolate brown eyes. The gentle fondness amd care in them made Ryan tear up. The days events once again getting to him.

"I'm sorry Ry." Those words had him balling

Luke had no idea what to do. His eyes widened at the sobbing male in front of him. His shoulders shook with silent sobs as he covered his mouth. The frown on his lips made Luke feel angry and sad for him. Within the short time that Ryan had been with him he could feel the connection he had with the guy.

Luke reached over, soothingly rubbing Ryan's arm. "Hey hey, Shh its ok its alright." He scooted over a small bit closer, keeping in mind Ryan's privacy and their short status as 'friends' if someone could call them that.

"Come here. Its ok darlin." Luke almost slapped himself when he said that. It slipped out of his mouth before he could even catch the word

To his surprise though Ryan came closer and hugged him, wrapping his arms around Luke's waist and burying his head into his chest.

It was comforting and safe. The sound of rain whispered in the background comfortingly. The warmth from Ryan warmed Lukes body. His tears seemed to have stopped yet Ryan remained in his arms. Luke continued to rub soothing circled on his back, letting his thoughts wander.

"Luke?" Ryan's soft, shy voice broke Luke from his trance. He looked down at the brown ruffled hair and tilted his head, leaning closer to Ryan. "Yeah bud?"

It took Ryan a few seconds to answer. His tired mind made it hard for him to formulate a sentence but he managed to get the words out.

"I'm sorry." Luke dryly chuckled and patted his head, leaning to the side so they both could lean against the sofa. "Its alright Ry."

"Luke?"

"Yes Ryan?"

"Thank you."

[squidcalamarium]

An open letter to three people

I would write this (and post it) on some other social media platform, or even write it out in a google doc, but that all feels either more vulnerable or impersonal than I want this to be. I understand that posting about my Feelings on tumblr isnt really all that private, but here all I am is what I say I am, and that matters more than anything really.

Anyway

This is going to be really long.

Five years ago, when I was 15, I identified as agender and pansexual. I was struggling a lot with feelings of "greyness" accompanied by intense bursts of anxiety, and both would make me cry. I cried a lot. I cried a lot for years. I still cry fairly easily but thats beside the point because I dont cry As Much, now. I dont cry as much as I used to, and it's not as painful as it used to be, because I have you three.

I was 14 and scared of myself when I met my first real best friend, at a mutual friends birthday party. I used to struggle with accepting a lot of things about myself, before I met her. Before I met you, I was disgusted by the way I looked. Not because I thought I was fat, though I struggled with that some, no, the main reason was my skin. I was raised believing the darkness in my skin was something to be ashamed of. Not ever directly, my grandmother would never ever tell me, her perfect granddaughter, that her skin tone was shameful. But it was in everything around me, from the age of 8 to 12, that taught me that being Half of something that's supposed to be Opposite of another, is wrong. The distinction between Right White and Black as Sin.

You helped me see past that. You helped me be able to look back at pictures of myself from when I was in elementary, middleschool, yesterday, and not have to look away. I was a really cute kid, looking back. I dont have to fight myself when my mom posts pictures of me from years ago on Facebook anymore. I know I'm not ugly. I know I never was. Now.

It struck me when I was 14, a year after getting to know you, that I didnt think my skin was ugly anymore. That I could like features about myself again. I cried when I realized that. I started to explore myself in other ways, after that, because I could finally look past how I Looked into what I Am.

I tried out genderfluid for a while, scared to admit I wasn't a Girl. At 15 I tried out agender, and like I said above, that was probably a product of my hormonally increased depression. It was also because I was scared to admit I Was A Boy. It's easier to say I'm nothing than it is to say I'm something.

It's hard, learning to accept one aspect of yourself only to struggle immediately after with another.

I dont remember much about this stretch of time in my life, and my timeline is incredibly blurry. I remember when I first met my two best friends, but I dont remember when I first met my girlfriend. Probably because we just weren't very close at the time. It was middleschool, after all. We met through a mutual friend and never really got to spend any time together until highschool. Anyway, back on topic. I think I was about to talk about how I learned to Love again.

For a Very long time, I was scared to even say the words "I love you" out loud and in a coherent manner to another human being. Saying "I love you" felt like a weakness, something vulnerable that once said, would be used against me. It had been, before, but not by you. Which you? All three of you.

Love, too me, used to be something sacred and delicate that could be ruined if I said it to freely. To say it would be to give someone the opportunity to hurt me, and no matter how many times someone said they loved me, I couldnt say it back. I was like this for so long, and it hurt so much.

Love, too me now, is still something incredibly special, but also something that should be said freely. Love is a feeling best felt shared. Love isnt just Romantic, and it never has been. I love flowers in fall, I love the feeling of summer rain, I love the color pink, I love the Concept of goblins, I love my hair, I love my girlfriend, I love my best friends. I love being able to say "I love you" without feeling like I'm pulling rocks out of my lungs. I love being able to say "I love you" without feeling the blood grow heavy in my skin and fear suplex my heart.

I love knowing I'm loved just as much as I love them.

I love knowing no one is going to fight over who I love more. Knowing I love you all differently and just as passionately. Knowing I dont have to be scared of being abandoned.

When I learned how to love without being scared, and how to trust in others, I was able to accept more about myself. I was around 17 when I accepted the fact that I'm a man. I'm not a girl, I'm not nothing, I am genuine to myself. I struggled a lot with accepting that. I was scared of myself.

Before I came to that conclusion, and went a little bit wild, I met my other best friend. He helped me find peace in myself.

I was not in the best place, when I was 16. I almost did a lot of things when I was 16. I dont think I tried to kill myself, but I also dont remember a lot of my teen years. He would know better, the kind of place I was in at the time. He helped me get through it.

Sometimes, when you catch yourself in a rut and cant seem to find a way out and just end up digging yourself down deeper, you need someone to call you an idiot. You need someone to go "maybe instead of resigning yourself to pacing back and forth forever, you could try and climb. You could try and dig into the walls and climb. Just stop trying to pretend it's okay, and ask for help."

I decided from then on out that I was going to treat myself better. That I wouldnt seek out self deprecation, and I wouldnt dwell on things that made me feel bad. It was hard, and it Still Is, but I'm better now. I'm better than I was. I still have the screenshots of the texts he sent me. They're on a blog I used to Write my Woes onto, but now its just an archive.

I am no longer my Own Worst Enemy.

When I first got with my girlfriend, I was kind of in the middle of losing my mind, and I ended up breaking up with her. Awful decision, really, but it needed to happen. I needed to grow as a person, into someone who deserved her even a Little Bit.

I still dont think I'm good enough for her, not by a long shot, shes a better person than I'll ever be. But she loves me anyway. Shes seen me when I looked my worst, when my brain was at its worst, and she still loves me. I dont think ill ever measure up to be what I think she deserves, but I try.

She motivates me, more than anything, to keep trying. To keep going. I almost didnt make it past 19, despite everything I still almost gave in, I almost gave up. I refuse to hurt her like that though. I can't hurt any of you like that.

I cant give up now, not when I have a future to look forward to, and that above all else is what she gives me. Its what you give me. A future to look forward too, to want to earn, to achieve.

I have never really had any solid idea of what I wanted out of life as I gotolder. Usually I'd go for more vague things, like "I want to be an artist and make money from my crafts" and "I want to be a therapist for tweens and young teens, to help them understand themselves." But besides that, I had nothing. What kind of life would I lead, outside of these Career Paths?

Now, I know I just want to be yours. For as long as you'll have me.

I'm 20 now. I am a man, and I don't really want to bother much with a label for my sexuality besides saying I'm queer. I have two best friends, one like a sister another like a muse, and my girlfriend. I have a cat named chelly and a dog named princess.

My life isnt where I want it to be, but I'm a better person now than I was before.

I'm better at Being a person than I ever have been.

Because everything I am now I had the potential to become, and everything I will be I have to potential to become.

There are a finite amount of resources in me, and the more I learn the better I am at using them.

I still get upset just as easily now as I did before, I can still spiral just as badly. I can still cry just as quickly. It's just that now, I know what to do to calm down a little quicker. Now, I'm nicer to myself. Now, I know how to redirect my emotions and my thoughts.

I'm still everything that I was before, just with more experience. The same parts, just rearranged more effectively than before. I'm as quick to comfort myself as I am to comfort others.

And it's all thanks to them. It's all thanks to you.

Thanks you.

I love you

[noidsome]

The big issue with the digimon tri movies, and why you should be pissed too.

I just finished watching the 5th digimon movie, and to put it short, i excpected nothing and im still let down. This is a big negative critique on what ive seen so far from the tri movies, but its also more of a vent for me, because theres something about these movies that really fucking grinds my gears and i feel i finally need to let that out somewhere. Look at this as a sort of....badly written analyctic rant. So far this movie, in short, was as i dreaded, 70% meiko bullshit and 20% kari...which is so fucking insulting i dont even know...but thats why im here.

Now before you assblast me with your stupid crap, please try to understand that as harsh as im writing this, im trying to look at this movie from a critical standpoint, and no im not going to put in the effort to be “nice” about it because if digimon tri can get away with half assing everything about itself, then wont bother. If you cant handle that, move on. If your interested, click the read more and we can begin this shit fest, because i think its about god damn time someone put these mediocre movies in their place.

The pacing.

I dont know about you guys, but to me it feels like these movies, or episodes, are either dragging on forever, or they rush really fast. This movie especially took its sweet ass time to give us 2 whole half an hour scenes of meiko being depressed about her shitty OC digimon, to leave the actual interesting fights and plot to 1 and a half episode, out of 4. Im sorry but i feel like ive been following this fucking story for 6 years, its so fucking slow and it drags on for fucking ever sometimes.

I do understand that its important to establish character interactions, and god damn does this fucking series need some, but sometimes it really stops the action dead in its tracks, and as much as i appriciate the movies giving each character some focus, it goes on for too long. the ending to movie 5 was....well rushed as shit. 

But despite all this, its just really frustrating that half the entire series is just them standing around and TALKING...talking talking talking, exposition exposition exposition. It also feels really slow and stagnated sometimes, and the cheesy music in the background of the sad scenes dont really help much. And other times things are glossed over so fast that im standing there wondering if i missed out on something because i accedently blinked. Like how they entered the digital world, only to just suddently fall out of it immediatly after from a big digital gate just like that. Or how meiko just...SUDDENTLY appeared in the digital world with no warning or real reason. huh?? shes here now?? what?? meicoomon is still infected? what?? gennai is back with the dark masters? what where did they come from? why are they following him!? WHAT?? HUH??? HELLO???

im just….frustrated. im frustrated that i have to wait for 6+ months every a new movie comes out, only for the movie to stall for fucking ever and leave the actual OH SHIT moments to the last part, AND END ON A CLIFFHANGER. Its such fucking god damn bait to get us to watch the other movies, its almost INSULTING how incredibly obvious it is. Last movie ended with gennai fucking around and choking meiko. Then, as i saw my fat ass down in the chair, waiting for the big battle, no meicoo just...opened portals and then left with her copy paste army. Oh well so much for that. 

Then the digidestined actually FALL OUT OF THE DIGITAL WORLD, and they are right back to standing around and getting chased by the cops...and then they spend THE REST OF THE EPISODES on meikos useless crying and baiting for meichi shipping material. im sorry but was that neccecary? was it neccecary to stop the entire god damn movie just so we could have tai standing there with spaghetti falling out of his pockets? and the mega evolutions for the other digimons felt really rushed too, i had hoped for more build up...but guess i get fuck alll.

The filler.

Now i do enjoy myself a little “filler” once in a while, i wont lie. and i will also not lie when i say that i really enjoyed seeing my boi tais hot nipple-less body. But, again…. DID WE NEED THE FIRST HALF BEING JUST THAT?! i swear to fucking god if you cut out all the filler content from these movies your going to get the entire series down to 5 episodes. Movie 2 was just...filler. fucking filler. i didnt have much issue with movie 3 but they just NEEDED to shove more meiko in..

movie 4 was kind of a bitch to sit trough because the whole damn “plot” made no sense. why was soras digimon the only one who was mad and while the others were just like before? why JUST her? why couldnt the others be like that too? Its just plot convenience at this point. and then it was pretty much just watching tai and matt spew spaghetti out of their pockets and be awkward because sora cant communicate with her friends like a normal person. Honestly it was a little charming at first but it got old pretty quickly…and then dark masters out of nowhere that died as fast as they came on. what a rushed little cameo for that extra nostalgia bait.

Honestly i found myself first liking the character interactions a little once the movies took a break from the action and fighting...but i much more often found myself angrily tapping my foot and going “REEEE MOVE ON.”

The god damn meiko.

Alright you all saw this one coming probably. Now let me just start by saying, i originally didnt mind meiko, or the idea of a new digitestined in the first place. Its welcoming to try and add something new to your otherwise soulless nostalgia cash grab. However we need to look at her from a critical stand point. im not trying to start a hate train, im just going to analyze her for how shes written as a character.

Im sorry to say this guys, but no matter how you look at her, shes a mary sue. Im sorry but all the tropes are there!! but why do i feel this way? heres why:

Her digimon is the sole reason for everything going to shit.

her digimon is in adult stage like gatomon just because.

essentially her digimon is “special”

all the other kids befriended her really fast just because.

everyone likes meiko and nobody seems to have a problem with her

shes the typical “uguu” shy type of girl.

her digimon OF COURSE won the costume contest in movie 2 or 3

leomon finds HER DIGIMON adorable enough to make the others run off... of course….

she cries constantly and does nothing but wine as the others hold her.

She takes up MAJORITY of the screentime for almost all movies. Almost.

POSSIBLY a relationship with the main character, if they actually are baiting us with those scenes in movie 5.

acts and feels like a self-insert OC in a canon universe.

The reason i dont like her is just because im SICK OF HER!! im sick of seeing her fucking face every god damn movie. im sick of the others shoving a friendship speech or talking about her belonging to them for the 700th GOD DAMN TIME, im sick of constantly hearing ME-MEI and MEIKOOOOOO, and im so fucking sick of seeing her sit down and cry or act sad and do NOTHING! shes just THERE TO BE THERE! her “cute little sneezing quirk” wasnt even something they bothered keeping any more. Shes so god damn obnoxious and shallow, and the ENTIRE HALF OF THE 5TH MOVIE WAS SPENT SHOVING MORE FRIENDSHIP SPEECHES IN HER FUCKING HEAD UNTIL SHE NUTTED UP AND STRAIGHT UP TOLD THE OTHERS TO AXE OFF MEICOOMON, while kari got 5 fucking minutes and got posessed or some shit i dont fucking know, does anyone care at this point?! 

shes such a god damn self insert its PAINFUL! and ive read plenty of crappy OC digimon fanfiction in my days to be able to tell when someone props their crappy OC in a canon story. IVE DONE IT MYSELF!! its INSULTING that im watching a canon produced digimon FANFICTION more then an actual OVA. If you like her, FINE, but you CANT ignore how incredibly shallow and flawed shes written. This isnt someone “hating female characters” this is someone whos frustrated a shittly written character who is just causing repetitive sob scenes over and over and over. im sorry but have we not gotten enough flashbacks from meiko and her digimon? do we need 4 more in the fifth movie??? WE GET IT! ITS SAD! SHES SAD!! THEY ARE FRIENDS! MOVE ON ALREADY!!

i dont feel bad for her anymore, its just getting repetitive now. She ate up the entire 5th movie and left nothing to kari but the sloppy leftovers at the end, and because she ran off like an idiot to meicoomon she got tai axed off too……………...but i will get to that.

The lack of animation.

The biggest insult, and this is….dare i say…….something coming from an animation student, is the insufferable animation. The first movie is fine, but from thereon, i feel like the quality dropped significantly. and oh boy, dont get me started on the amount of time they just pan a fucking picture instead of animating them doing shit.

im sorry but did i wait 4-6 months for a fucking clipshow? I know that animating is hard, and the animation industry in japan is absolute fucking shit, but come the fuck on guys. i think movie 5 had so many times where they just panned pictures of the digimon fighting, and the kids running. I guess when you put all your budget into overanimating the short action scenes you got, you dont have much left for them to trow a punch outside of that. and i wouldnt mind if they had just bothered not doing it so much. they do it WAY TOO OFTEN!

in the 4th move they didnt even fucking bother drawing the kids wet while they were in the water. no wet droopy hair, no indication the clothing was soaked, nothing. not a god damn fucking detail or anything.

The nostalgia bait

Hey kids, remember the bus in the digital world??? remember the gear desert? remember the house mimi was a princess in?? remember the pink forest? remember seadramon? remember the dark masters???? remember any of that shit!? remember primary village?! YEAH??? REMEMBER ALL THOSE COOL 01 THINGS??? ok cool, anyway moving on.

The lack of personality/soul

one thing im really passionate about is expressions. expressive characters and facial expressions i something i enjoy drawing a lot. in the original digimon, every character was spesifically designed to be its own thing. sure they stank of the 90s, but they wer UNIQUE. Digimon tri has trown all that shit out the window. Now they all look boring as hell. the only unique thing about them now is their hair. take that away, and you get a bunch of similar looking, boring samefaced characters.

the digimon movies are just so fucking SOULLESS! everyone looks so god damn watered down and tame compared to their former selves. everyone wears a school uniform even when they got summer vacation. they even wear school uniforms as they get to the digital world, and they have NO facial expressions. NONE! the way they talk and show emotions is almost nonexistant. even once they are seriously screaming at someone or focusing on something serious, they still have that stale, boring as shit facial expression. stone faced and COLD! its like you dont even care!! seriously its so frustrating to watch sometimes because they are so god damn bland and barely deviate at all from their typical “idle” face.

^count how many fucking times tai makes this face troughout the entire series. 

^am i the only one who thinks they looks very..bland and dull here? and this happens way too often.

seriously, watch the movies again and notice just how little the animators bothered giving them any fucking emotions. the screenshots here are just from a few minutes in the new movie.

And dont get me started on how everyone seemed so.........accepting of tais “death” i mean sure they might still be in shock,.....but......why did none of pic under appear???? 

WHy was everyone so.....noble??? except kari...who got....fucking owned.

and the digimon....most of them are just....comic relief now. i feel like most of them have little personality, but fucking agumon. what the FUCK have they done to agumon!? hes just a walking talking “i like to eat” joke. hes fucking nothinng. an empty boring sack of shit who just talks about food and NOTHING ELSE!! oh and maybe fights sometimes...but seriously.

The BAIT.

The trailers for these movies have made me fall into the bait they put out. But its getting infuriating now. All the trailer bait for movie 5 was just taken form the last 5 minutes of the film. that little teaser we all thought were going to show the dark ocean? yeah that was what….5 seconds at the very last minute of the movie? Hime was the one who went there, and they even rushed that part. 

remember when we all tought that tai was the kaiser because the animators thought they copy the excact same hairstyle? remember how they all baited us with the kaiser thinking we were gonna get some 02 action? i sure as FUCK do.

i LOVED the last minutes of the movies. i loved the last half of episode 3 and the entire episode 4… but im so fucking angry that i have to wait 4-6 months for the conclusion to when the movie was JUST GETTING INTERESTING! i fucking hate it!!

The 02 kids, or lack thereof.

Ok honestly ive completely forgotten about them, and i dont understand why they bothered putting them in this movie. and they give us absolutly nothing to go on for ALL of the movies! WHY? WHATS THE POINT?! with this series endless stalling, how can they possibly explain their absence or death or whatever in what little time we have left?! how will they half ass this?! i seriously dont get how they can begin with something so intense, only to give us absolutly nothing till the last movie, IF AT ALL!

Taichis “””””””””””””””””death.”””””””””””””””””

So the fuckers had the BALLS to kill off my boi tai. They actually went there. they fucking killed him off. AND LEFT IT ON A CLIFFHANGER! wow fucking good job guys, you sure got me there. i cant believe tai is fucking dead.

except wait a second here…..tai isnt dead. of course he fucking isnt. i mean come the fuck on, are you really expecting them to kill off their marketig king? the face of all their merc? PLEASE! we all fucking know that hes going to come back. THEY BASICALLY SPOILED THE MOVIES FOR US ALREADY, didnt they say in an interview far back that these movies were whats going to lead everyone up to their careers? so why the fuck would tai die when we know hes going to be an ambassador? 

i dont fucking understand why they even bothered with this fake ass death. WE KNOW HES GOING TO COME BACK! im not mad that tai “died,” im mad that they actually bothered making it a cliffhanger, as if we arent going to fucking figure out hes coming back in the next movie. WHATS THE POINT?! Are they going to just shove him off till the last 5 minutes of the last movie? is that it? are they going to do what they did to kari? or are we FINALLY going to see tai resolving his persional issues that have been shoved away to make room for everything else? who knows, who cares at this point?!

The conclusion

Digimon tri was something enjoyable for me to look forward to..but now, its just a bunch of frustrating, medicore, nostalgia cash-grabbing shitfests of movies, and i need to get it out of my system. 

Im angry because i have to wait 4-6 months between each movie only to get nothing. im angry that i have to wait 4-6 months for an hour long movie that has actual content thats 20 minutes long. im sick of having my excpectations set to low, only for them to be lowered even more. im sick of seeing meiko basically becoming the main characters as the others are somewhat side characters at this point. im sick of the shit-tier animation quality and the stone-bored dull surprise faces. im sick of wanting this to be good, only to see that the fucking directors and animators arent even fucking trying anymore. Im sad, that the sequel was put in the hands of incompetent fucks who only know digimon trough their most basic character traits, and nothing more.

i do like tri...and im sad to see it go so soon….but part of me wants to get this over with, because if you like it or not, tri isnt a passionate fan sequel. tri is a boring, mediocre cash grab, and im sad it cantt be more then that, and im sad its over soon...

[galimatios]

sci fi ya au musings from twitter thread mostly nts

maybe i do want to write YA science fiction ya with gay and all my favorite self indulgent tropes and also plugsuits

I HATE MYSELF I IMMEDIATELY HAVE SCENES IN MY HEAD . ITS BEEN TWO GODDAMN SECONDS. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHO THESE CHARACTERS ARE YET tjinking about those rooms in that one ep of black mirror where youcan program jt tk show whatever you want on the walls. maybe projection of virtual reality vs reality as a major motif. simulations and distance... long distance relationships during a war in space action too... have to think about an enemy but maybe we rag on capitalism a littlle maybe some conglomerate is fighting a proxy war using aliens vs the govt the protags are in the military for theme.. war sucks bye but also theres dynamics i want

UM I CAN PUT BIG MECHA INNNNNNNN YEAHHHH anyway i want 2 loyal dog dynamics to juxtapose w eachother + platonic soulmate type protag duo, best friends , one girl one boy, theyre both equally important, some SHIT happens and theyre forced on different sides at some point one loyal dog is treated well, like an equal, will follow x to the end of the world the other is Not treated well. i want to explicitly make that relationship abusive so i can point at it in the text itself and have other loyal dog be like , that's not love. abandoned loyal dog gets adopted by main duo, ends up in a relationship w one of them (whichever one makes it gay), im ship girl with side character who inspires tf out of her, sort of like. theyre competitive and the side character is light years more skilled but girl wants the challenge, wants the chase, is fueled by the prospect of catching up so "wait for me" LAYS DOWN NONE OF THESE CHARACTERS HAVE NAMES OR DESIGNS OR ANYTHING BUT IM ALREADY ATTACHED TO THESE CONNECTIONS mc pair: one techy soft boy nerd who just wants to protect his family so thats why he agreed to help develop/operate tech bc he thinks this is how he can help headstrong pilot ace girl who has no one but wants to prove herself and make a name for herself so she'll be remembered she wants to win glory for herself and comes off as super confident but actually she's just. asuka evangelion except she doesnt crash and burn so bad bc she has the boy who sees thru it, you dont have to try so hard probably happens after a fight where she's reckless hes not one to get mad but this time he's pissed bc she was exceptionally close to dying, yells at her, why do you keep trying so hard to die kinda snaps her back to reality he wants her to rely on him more bc that's what hes here for anyway loyal dog defects from enemy + meets this pair after other loyal dog suggests he joins the crew, tech boy is kind to Everyone but loyal dog FORMERLY AN ASSASSIN ???????? TYPE?? SNIPER?? develops baby crush girl sips her drink :3c

I HAVE TO THINK MORE ABOUT THEM BC OH NO THEYRE CUTE but girl is chasing after some nb femme prodigy who she's rivals with and admires for more than just her skill theyre both emotionally constipated idiots tho so its like. (hand touch) thats enough for 100 years there is. so much tension. and prodigy seems so perfect on the outside but is actually in some kind of super strict fucked up program bc of her skill, and she hated it and is suffering ace pilot is the one to barge in headstrong and fuck everything up and get her out of there girl believes prodigy is amazing. really. incredible. a part of her feels like she'll never catch up . but even so watching prodigy walk into the unknown unflinchingly resolute ... it's both sad in a way bc she's being left behind but also she wouldnt have it any other way bc she thinks forward is the only way prodigy should be facing. its what inspires her. that strength ... h they definitely settle down together in the future tho bc i need ththattt

"when this is all over" said the prodigy, "come find me" this is so self indulgent anyway plotwise once both the govt and the enemy r revealed to be equally bad the main cast defect to a revolutionary group. they will Not win within the span of the novel but theyll have a small victory, very les mis one day more flavored, and even if they did not win they stood for something they believed in, did something to try and tell the truth... also i need more of a cast so i can kill characters off nice now all i have to do is fill all this in with world building and action and stuff and ill have a novel so many sci fi things have done the 2 pilot mind sync emotional thing right so if i do the same thing no one knows if i took it from one franchise or another i need to twist it around a little but i may have ideas haha i can. totally make this a part of my fucking huge sci-fi au really wanna call main girl lane and main boy khemrin . .. i cant unsee the girl as rey flavored so shes ending up w red hair and irish, but boy is SEAsian with a huge family, loyal dog who defects is african, prodigy is asian, other loyal dog feels south american prodigy... astrid is her real name but she may have a codename fsr? idk why i feel it. icarus? assassin defector... something that starts with an o or a d other loyal dog... i need to think but i also need to figure out the personalities of their respective pairs inserts minh as evil one. done. maybe mephis adjacent character for the... no mephis doesnt care abt anyone BUT hed be a great side character OH god what if au jonah and ambrose oh boy. FUCK jonahs probably there for some special task bc hes. attuned to some shit idk

I GUESS IM GONNA DEVELOP AMBROSE MORE ive only written him as a young adult but as a teen hes angry and rebellious and got drafted, ended up being a simple foot soldier but he meets jonah and a lot changes jonah's there on top secret bullshit, same program as astrid definitely has some shit to do With Experiments. astrid has enhanced eyesight/coordination on top of being an ace combat pilot, i think jonah might be able to open up warp gates or limited pocket space mephis is evil scientist who doesnt care abt casualties

I'm thinking about unnamed pilot lesbians and i am. enamored immediately holy shit god they're both so goal oriented and focused but once the fighting is finally over they finally allow themselves to embrace the intensity of their emotions for eachother and i am fucking perishing they were essentially raised as child soldiers so it's this clumsy process of trying to figure things out for the first time, this kind of innocent but intense and blooming love between two hardened soldiers, the years of war coming away when they're together for the first time actually fuck i did name them but i'm still not sure about ace pilot girl? i want to name her lane or something monosyllable, maybe i'll revamp raine and make her this oc instead... either way i'm just. ugh. UGH. FUCK. holy shit they love eachother so much

I"M GETTING REALLY FUCKED UP ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF THE PRODIGY (ASTRID) DYING IN THE LINE OF DUTY or well at least goes missing, presumed dead but raine just... doesn't believe it. astrid can't die. she's too amazing. there's no way fucking. huge disbelief. she refuses? raine going on a near suicidal self-appointed mission against commander's orders to rescue her, khemrin tries to hold her back but he can't, she' fucking gone speeding off on one of the fastest scouting ships she can hijack raine finding her alive but barely conscious in a damaged cockpit floating in space for who knows how long, raine unable to open the hatch and get to her but anchors her ship to hers, NOT EFFECTIVE BUT HER ONLY REAL CHOICE w/o compromising the air seal. makes the journey back astrid barely makes it to the space equivalent of a truck stop (unaffiliated) and raine calls for backup in panic and tries her best to tend to astrid's wounds an feed her and she's fucking PANICKING but trying so hard to keep it together astrid wakes up and raine's crying i don't have anything specific its just really soft and raine never Does this god when they meet again after the war, raine running her fingers over the scar left from astrid's helmet shattering h raine in a tux and astrid dressed like a princess and raine kissing her shoe sorry im gay bye

[starsaga01]

So uhh i know if my gf or my irl friends see this on my tumblr they are going to REAM me for having MLP oc’s but you know what, frick off gaywads. 

Uhm if you wanna know WHY i made these and their backstories then click the keep reading, if not just enjoy the designs and changes. 

The bottom two are the original concepts for the refined characters up top. I watch a lot of those channels on youtube that just rip peoples oc’s apart and they were going into depth as to how “hard” it is to make decent Pony Characters. I was like come on it cannot be that hard, and i made two designs on the spot and then did a redraw to finish up what they should look like. ALSO everyone who is in the MLP Fandom seems to HATE alicorns that arent cannon because a lot of people dont design or write them well. So i made these both backstories and DawnLilly does have a reason/event that happened as to WHY she is one. Also im pretty sure i based SorrowSong’s design on an old mobile i had as a baby. So thats cool. Anyways im rambling and yeah i made these as a why the hell not. 

Name: Sorrow Song Nicknames: Lully, Song Gender: Female Age: 10 horse years  Species: Unicorn Height: 5 ft Weight: She’s like average weight for a taller pony. Dunno Hometown: Silver Blossom Island Current Residence: Volcanbloom Island Occupation: Caretaker/teacher Mane Color/Style/Length: Long, in a braid on top, hair curls around eachother in the tail Coat Description: a lavender  Eye Shape/Color: Yellow, sharp yet sad Accessories: None Cutie Mark:  A crescent moon and music note with a little star Special Talent: Singing Lullabies, she can calm and lull anypony to sleep Family: DawnLilly, Silver Ship, and Spring Melody Friends: Characters i will not make refs for that live on the islands Personality: She is reserved but very kind, she is the type to want to help out whoever she can, she loves children and often volunteers to watch them if she has a friend who needs help. She does not get along with her sister but still loves her dearly, she is kind of socially awkward but people like her. She gets along better with children and often spends her nights with them Flaws: She is Quick to judge, she tends to snap at older ponies rather than the kids, she will sometimes not voice her opinions and thus keeps her frustrated, often lets her emotions fester before blowing up. Has an ugly laugh. [Character History] Her family as well as herself is from a large group of islands far off from anywhere near the actual storyline of MLP. A lot of the times there are storms and the parents will try to use magic and abilities to hold it off or lessen them, when they go off they elect someone to watch over all the children. When she was old enough, they asked SorrowSong to watch them on a particularly nasty storm night. The little foals were restless, scared, and couldnt sleep due to the storm. Not knowing what to do after trying to give them food, and bedtime stories she began to sing. She was singing more so to calm herself, but all around her one by one the kids began to settle down and eventually fall asleep. This is how she got her cutie mark.  [Powers List]

She can use basic magics like making things float or move, magic based around helping sleep or calm others, when she is angry if she uses magic it can give someone insomnia. 

Name: Dawn Lilly Nicknames: Lilly, Dawn, Sweetie Gender: Female Age: 4 horse years Species: Alicorn Height: 4 ft 4 inches Weight: like twilight weight Hometown: Silver Blossom Island Current Residence: Volcanbloom Island Occupation: Guardian of the Islands Mane Color/Style/Length: Long waveyish curls at the ends, a pink and light green mane color Coat Description: soft yellow Eye Shape/Color: bright pink Accessories: None Cutie Mark: An island blossom with a ring of magic around it (before she became an alicorn it had just been a blossom with two small stars of blue magic coming out) Special Talent: Helping plants grow and bloom Family: Sorrow Song, Silver Ship, and Spring Melody Friends: Characters i will not make refs for that live on the islands Personality: She is very young compared to her sister and that reflects in her very happy yet bumbling personality, while she IS an alicorn she feels that she has not changed at all from the unicorn she once was. She is unsure of herself when the islanders come to her for advice, and while she is usually happy and outgoing times of decision making make her nervous and stutter. She is NOT a princess, there are cheifs of the islands, and she is more like their mutual adviser. When she wants to be she can be quite the assertive little one, but most of the time she wants to be spending her days gardening and swimming with her friends.  Flaws: She is a little too care free for her job. She is not good at making tough choices or being put on the spot. A lot of the time she will run away from her issues, and she is self doubting constantly.  [Character History] When she was little she helped her mom grow Silver Lillies, that are difficult to properly care for. When they had not grown properly and started to wilt her mother told her that perhaps a different kind of flower, but Dawn Lilly would not take that answer, she tries all different types of magic trying to get them to grow. One night when she was tired she went outside during a blue moon, and she tried one last spell before she was going to give up. As she did the flowers began to bloom and glow bright under the moon, thus giving her her cutie mark of the magic to make plants grow. 

Alicorn: There is a large volcano on Volcanbloom Island. Legends said that thousands of years before a dragon has decided to make its home there, and it slept within the volcano. Well after all those years a horrible storm that the other ponies could not control shook the islands to their cores, thus awakening the sleeping dragon. The dragon had grown much larger as it had slept and as it emerged it burst the volcano sending lava spewing all over the different islands and burning the lush forests of the islands. While most of the ponies were okay, their islands were bare and torn apart. Because it was her special power she decided to try a spell she had been working on to grow masses of plant life all at once. She had been making it so they could harvest and grow crops in larger amounts. This was her chance to use it for more, to aide the entire population of the islands. She stood at the top of what was left of the volcano and channeled the spell. As her horn sparked to life a giant beam of light came up from the volcano and an ancient spirit who had resided there whispered to Dawn Lilly that she was going to be her vessel, and as she did the spell went off like a boom. The plants and trees had began to regrow all over, the ground clearing of ash and rising an amount of green that not been seen on the isles in a long time. As the spell retracted to her she passed out, small pink blooms going up the face of the island. When Dawn Lilly awoke she was surrounded by her friends and family who stared at her in shock and awe. She had become an alicorn and the blue sparkles that had once been above the little on her cutie mark was now an entire aura of blue magic and she had wings. Now she protects her islands while trying to discover why her, and what her greater purpose as an alicorn is.  [Powers List]

Uhm well her powers are pretty obvious from the rest of the story. So read it.

[siavahdainthemoon]

your piece on historical evil reminded me of thoughts ive had about american politics lately. people are saying stuff like "well they just dont know any better thats how they were raised thats all the info they have no one taught them different" etc to excuse why a lot of people are trying to take away the rights and lives of other people. but in this era of immense internet access, when all the information they would need to learn is so immediately available… i dont think that counts anymore.

Like I said in that post, I no longer believe that’s an excuse that works for historical time periods in which people didn’t have access to outsider views, so yes, definitely, it absolutely doesn’t count now. Because short of being raised in some militant type fundamentalist compound with no access to the internet or tv or books…you really just have no excuse. There’s no way to live, in an industrial nation, and not have access to other perspectives - usually you don’t even have to look for it. 

I mean, I was raised Roman Catholic, and by very conservative parents. This was in Ireland and the UK mostly, so we’re not talking American Republican levels of conservative…but my stepmother was ex-BNP (which is the British party that was so racist they were actually forced to dismantle it, and it became what’s now UKIP - which is still, honestly, super racist and isolationist and all levels of urgh, okay) who banned my brother from the kitchen because Only Women Cook and refused to take my half-sisters to see The Frog Princess because ‘she’s not a real princess, Sia, she’s black.’ My dad once said he’d rather his children were trans than gay, because at least being trans was a biological mix-up between brain and body and therefore ‘made sense’. My house was full of casual racism and fatphobia and again, just so many levels of urgh, okay? And I was such a brainwashed little idiot that I even defended Guantanamo Bay as a necessary thing for a school presentation, when I was eleven or so. 

(I am still horrified by that. I recently even tracked down the teacher who was in charge of that assignment to apologise, because, well. I kind of had to.)

And by seventeen I was a pansexual-identifying neo-pagan who had one token straight in my gang of friends and was living off social welfare (because my parents had moved to the USA and I was alone in the UK and my student welfare was the only thing letting me eat, because my dad somehow wanted me to get my A Levels while working a full-time job and reaching suicidal levels of depression, which was obviously not happening). By nineteen I couldn’t have any conversation with my dad because we ended up screaming at each other no matter how innocuous the topic - I’m 24 now and that’s still true. 

(My latest and last-ever trip to visit them in New Jersey, he picked me up from the airport and asked had I seen any good films lately. I told him about Ghostbusters, the all-female one, and how it had made me laugh till I cried - and he immediately dismissed it as ‘just a crazy feminist thing’. I was in the car for all of two minutes, we hadn’t even left the airport yet, and I was talking about a comedy film I’d enjoyed. And I’d promised that this trip I wouldn’t go near anything political to minimise the fucking trauma of being in a house with those people. I seriously considered getting out of the car and just living in the airport for a week until I could go home; I did burst into tears because I was so fucking tired and just, two minutes.

Two minutes. Two minutes is officially how long we can be around each other without it going to Hell.)

Some things I figured out spontaneously that my parents were wrong about - Roman Catholicism just rubbed me wrong and by the time I was nine I was refusing to go to Church, I refused to be Confirmed without knowing anything about any other religions. My dad and stepmother’s fatphobia upset me because I was (and still am) overweight for my size, and so their comments about other people or people on tv hit me, too, even though they rarely directed them at me. I didn’t know queerness was a thing until I was thirteen, when I found it through (of course) fanfiction, but after that I knew what they said and thought about being queer was bullshit. Other stuff I learned from my friends and my teachers, and fandom in general kickstarted so many revelations in my head - I went to all-girls’ schools almost exclusively but didn’t discover feminism until I was eighteen, and then wow, talk about a self-sustaining cycle of liberationlism.

And my point is - the moment I got old enough to start properly thinking for myself, which was at about fourteen/fifteen - there was just no way to stay brainwashed. Things that contradicted what my parents were saying was literally everywhere. And I’m not special, I’m not some kind of genius, I’m not an outlier. If I could do it, in the environment I was in, I’m not buying any excuses that other people can’t too. You have to be walking around with your eyes shut not to see everything that contradicts the idea that people not-like-you are actually not-like-you. Because they’re not not-like-you, they’re just like you, and should be treated exactly as you would like to be, by you and your family and your government and your world. 

You just cannot live in the modern world and not be exposed to the fact that conservative little you is just wrong. If you don’t see it, then sorry, that’s entirely on you. The entire world is screaming it at you. If you don’t hear it, it’s because you’re not listening. And no one else is to blame for that, no matter who raised you.

You don’t know better? Bullshit. You don’t want to know. And that’s all there is to it.