#like only 1 in 6 boops are going through lmao

[nivq87]

I am being NERFED @gloompun

[horansqueen]

You & Me : chapter 10

A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA

Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS

CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9

NOTES:

-one chapter is her pov, the next is his. -4.2k // 4.4k -im sorry, i never proofread, i hate it. -there WILL be smut. but not only smut. -this is a romance, comedy, smut story. -for the summary, check my MASTERLIST.

- notes: i know Louis said it was his least favorite song on his album but it was too perfect so i had to use it. also, if you get the movie reference, youre amazing lmao! thanks for all the love, i hope you guys enjoy this chapter and that you’re not getting tired of this

requests! : added a few and ill post them but i didnt add ALL the things written in the asks just because it didn’t fit, i hope its okay! if you read there will be very tiny spoilers :)

Chapter 10 : Her chapter

OLIVIA

I quickly left after he turned away from me to walk to his car. Not because I wanted to leave but because his words had brought inside me a few sensations I felt guilty to feel. Hope, definitely. Happiness, probably. And also an intense relief that I couldn't explain. I felt relieved that he thought we were worth it. I felt relieved knowing that our friendship still surpassed any other relationship in his life, including his girlfriend. I felt happy that he was not going to give up and hopeful that we could go back to being close. That too, I felt guilty to feel. Would that hurt Dylan? He was already so understanding and sweet with me, he didn't deserve his fiance to lie to him, or even omit to tell him things.

I parked in front of my house and noticed Louis' car was there but I remained sitting behind the wheel a bit longer. Louis was there and I could talk to him. This is exactly what I needed yet, I couldn't find the courage to walk inside and sit with him. Perhaps I was not ready to let out all of this out loud because I knew it would make it even more real than it already was. Telling someone else was going to hit hard, I knew it.

I breathed in before pushing on the door but Louis was nowhere in sight. I frowned but took my shoes off and decided to walk to his room. The music was on, the door was closed, and I felt my heart skip a beat, hoping he was not with his girlfriend. I licked my lips before biting the bottom one and knocked at the door three times.

"Louis?"

The music stopped and it took only a few seconds for the door to open. His lips curled into a smirk and he leaned against the door frame, raising his eyebrows at me in a suggestive manner.

"Heyy, where did my queen spend the night?"

"Louis, I need to talk to you." I admitted, walking past him and inviting myself inside, ignoring his question.

"That bad, huh?" he chuckled a bit, closing the door behind us and turning around to look at me as I sat on his bed. "Did you let him fuck you into oblivion? Meaning that you totally forgot that you were both taken and that he had shattered your heart into millions of tiny pieces?"

I groaned and grimaced, letting myself fall on the bed, lying down on my back as my legs were still hanging from the bed. I grabbed his pillow and pressed it on my face before letting out a muffled scream. It took only a few seconds until he grabbed the pillow roughly and pushed it away on the bed.

"Did you really sleep with him?" he asked in a soft tone, looking down at me before I shook my head. "Did you two kiss?" Once again, I shook my head. "Then what's wrong?"

I let my eyes roam on Louis' face and licked my lips. I didn't want to say it, the words seemed to be stuck in my throat, but keeping them inside was starting to hurt physically. I just didn't know if it would hurt more after they came out...

"Say it, you know you can trust me." Louis expressed in a low and gentle tone, making me lick my lips again.

He didn't understand that the problem was not him hearing it, it was me admitting it. He kept looking at me, his eyes roaming on my face slowly, and I focused on the way he blinked, the way he smelled, the way he made me feel..

"I love him." I breathed so low I wasn't even sure I had heard myself. "I'm in love with Niall."

My best friend didn't show an ounce of surprise. Instead, he sent me a small smile and nodded, still looking down at me. I pressed my lips together, trying to keep the tears inside, but I felt them fill my eyes and did everything I could not to blink. I could pretend that seeing Niall made all my feelings come back to the surface but the only thing seeing Niall again made me do was realize that I never stopped loving him.

"And you love Dylan, too?" he asked, making me nod. "Okay, if you spend your life with Dylan, will you miss Niall?"

I held my breath, feeling my whole body throb at his question. He knew that answer, didn't he? Because he would always miss Eleanor if he was with someone else, that was a given. In fact, that was not even worth asking.

"Alright." he added, as if he read the answer in my mind. "If you spend your life with Niall, would you miss Dylan?"

I felt my eyes get bigger and I knew Louis was trying to read my answer on my face. He ended up just sighing low and tilting his head a bit.

"It's not about love, you know." I just replied, trying to avoid a question I ignored the answer of. "It takes more than love. A lot more. " I paused. "It was so much easier when it was only you and I."

This time, his lips curled into a smirk and he raised his eyebrows at me, moving his face slightly closer.

"You forget fast, my queen." he pointed out, booping my nose gently and making my lips curl slightly. "We were both miserable, shagging each other to get affection and orgasms but never really reaching the happiness we were longing for. We struggled so much, we've come so far."

"I know." I admitted, hearing my voice crack despite how low it was. "But we had each other."

"We still do." he replied, smiling fondly at me for a few seconds as I tried to contain my tears. "Wait a second, I want to show you something."

He quickly got off the bed and I sat up, looking at him. He searched through his stuff and I frowned when he grabbed a disk and finally, my lips curl.

"A CD? What is this? 2005?"

Louis chuckled, his back still facing me. "Oh shut up! I just wanted to be sure it wouldn't be leaked before it was supposed to. I don't trust cellphones. Or people, really."

This time, I laughed and shook my head. I knew what he meant, I also had a hard time to trust people. I used to be the type who would trust everyone and get hurt all the time. I guess the bad and manipulative persons I had met in my life had changed me.

Louis came back and sat next to me as a song started. The melody came to my ears but was quickly followed by his voice, bringing a sensation of comfort inside me. I knew Louis had worked a lot on his album and the fact that he was ready to share a song with me meant a lot more than he probably thought.

"You say to me your jeans don't fit You don't feel pretty and it's hard to miss I wish that you could see my point of view As someone staring back at you On Friday night when we're all out I turn to you and you're looking down And you don't wanna dance I know you love to dance You never stop given half the chance

Just keep your head up, love, keep your head up Don't hide away, don't ever change Keep your head up love, keep your head up Don't look away, don't look away"

I turned to him and sent him a smile, reaching for his hand and grabbing it in mine. I didn't know why but that song did something to me. I loved the way it seemed like he was talking to the person listening with a soft voice but it's only when I heard the chorus that I held my breath.

"'Cause everybody's looking at you now My, oh, my I guess some queens don't need a crown And I know why Even when your tears are falling down Still somehow You're perfect now"

He probably noticed my eyes getting bigger and knew I was asking myself questions because he simply nodded and squeezed my fingers tighter. I felt myself tear up and swallowed hard.

"You never do but if you asked me to I'd tell the truth lying next to you 'Cause you're the only one When it's said and done You make me feel like being someone good to you Even at your worst You steal the scene and it's unrehearsed Don't you wanna dance, just a little dance? I'll never stop given half the chance"

My lips finally parted and he sent me a fond smile, bringing his other hand on mine just as the bridge started.

"Every insecurity Like a neon sign As bright as day If you knew what you were to me You would never try to hide away"

Despite trying hard, I couldn't help it and started crying. I didn't even reach my face to wipe the tears off, I just sobbed low as I stared at him and gently, he brought one of his hands to my cheeks and brushed his thumb on them as I sniffed.

"'Cause everybody's looking at you now My, oh, my I guess some queens don't need a crown And I know why Even when your tears are falling down Still somehow You're perfect now"

We remained silent for a few minutes as I let the information sink in. Louis had told me his whole album would be based on his feelings for his girlfriend, and he had started writing it before he got back with her, that I knew, but I never thought he'd take the time to write one for me. I never thought I inspired him enough to get a whole song written about me. I didn't really believe I was interesting enough but the truth was, this song was beautiful, and it was mine.

"Thank you." I whispered, knowing my voice would break if I talked louder.

I swallowed my tears again but it started hurting and I felt my eyes flutter, letting more tears fall.

"At first, I wanted to bring you with me when I recorded it, but I decided it would be better if you were the first one to hear the final product." He stared at me a few seconds before moving his head slightly. "Come on."

I slipped my arms around his chest and leaned my head on him as he wrapped his arms around me. I closed my eyes and we remained in each other's arms for a few minutes before he gently fondled my back.

"I don't think you realize how big of an impact you had on my life, Liv." he continued. "You were there for me in a moment where I thought I had no one. You stuck by me, and you.. I never properly thanked you for calling El on that night."

I pulled away and looked in his eyes, sending a small but sad smile.

"You were there for me too, and I'll never forget that, Lou." I pointed out, looking down at my hands as I played with his fingers. "I mean, I had expected you to drop me and I wouldn't have blamed you. Niall's like a brother to you and you two have been through so much.. that comes first. I feel extremely lucky."

"There was no reason for me to choose between you and him. I took care of you because you were the one who needed me, and because you're my best friend."

"I was pathetic." I chuckled, shaking my head.

"You were hurt. We both were. And despite that, we helped each other. You realize that doesn't happen often, right? Normally, two persons going through the same thing can understand each other, but can't help each other. But you and I? We did both. We're invincible!"

This time, I laughed and licked my lips, nodding a bit. He was right, we went through so much together and somehow, we had helped each other out of misery in our own way. I had found my desire to live back with him... because of him, and the relationship I had with him was unique.

I thought about Niall and about how our relationship used to be unique, too. Perhaps, it still was and always would be, but I missed how it used to be. I missed how it used to be so easy between us and how nothing was awkward. I missed our talks, the fun we used to have, the inside jokes that made us laugh so hard that we couldn't breathe. And I missed him as a person, him as a best friend, him as a boyfriend. I knew I shouldn't live in the past but I couldn't help it. I couldn't stop thinking about going back to how happy we used to be together.

"Did you tell El about that song?" I asked cautiously, suddenly scared it would cast a chill between me and her.

"Mmhm, yea, she said it was okay." Louis tried to reassure me before chuckling. "Most of the album is about her so, she doesn't care."

I didn't want to say it out loud but I was actually jealous of his relationship with Eleanor. They were meant for each other and the way they loved each other was something I used to have but didn't anymore. I used to believe Niall and I shared the same kind of bond and love that Louis shared with his girlfriend but that time was over, and I couldn't help but think it was unfair.

"Okay, enough with this cheesy shit." he just said, hitting his own thighs slightly. "We're spending the evening together, okay? Pizza and poker. Like we used to do except this time, we can bet more money because you joined the rich asses club!"

I rolled my eyes and we both got up before I followed him to the kitchen.

"My ass is still as poor as it used to be, haven't seen my first check yet." I argued, raising my nose up.

"No problem, you can bet your supply of cookies!"

"Ah Ha! No way!"

He laughed more as he called the pizza while I grabbed a few beers in the fridge and got the cards. We sat exactly how we always did and he opened my beer, handing it to me before opening his and taking a sip from it. It was almost like a well rehearsed choreography and I smiled as he shuffled the cards. Quickly, he dealt them and I looked at those I got in my hands before he started talking again, grabbing a cigarette and lighting it up.

"So." he mumbled, taking his cigarette out of his mouth and breathing out the smoke on the side to make sure it didn't go near me. "What are you gonna do? Are you gonna tell Niall that you love him?"

I chuckled and raised my eyebrows, discarding two cards and glancing up at him.

"No." I let out firmly. "I'm getting married."

Louis stopped moving and after a while I looked up at him. He was staring at me and I could read a bunch of questions in his eyes. I grabbed a cookie from the box and put it in the middle of the table, trying to ignore the way he was looking at me but after a while, I just couldn't anymore.

"Okay Louis, say what you want to say." I let out with a sigh. "You normally don't keep it in so, throw it my way."

"When you say you're getting married, you mean you're getting married to Niall in a few years, that's what you mean, right? Because darling, marrying a man if you've got an other man in your heart, that's just fookin' unfair."

"I love Dylan." I argued, leaning against my chair.

"You love Dylan but you're in love with Niall." he replied a bit louder. "He's the one who's got your heart. He's got a hold on it that no one else ever did and probably ever will. You know it, I know it, and you know what? Dylan will realize it at some point. So you either try to find a way to get completely over Niall, or-"

"Or what? Or I give up the only chance I have to be happy with someone?" I cut him, my tone getting a bit harsh. "It's not my fault I fell in love with Niall, it's not my fault he broke my heart, and it's not my fault he came back! Why am I always the one who's got to give up everything when all i'm trying to do is survive and move on!"

I was on the verge of tears again and I shut my eyes tight, trying not to literally burst in front of my best friend. I loved Niall, I really did, but he was dating someone else. Yes, we had almost kissed a few times and yes, he told me that our friendship was worth saving, but that didn't mean he still had feelings for me. It didn't mean he wanted to be with me again. It didn't mean he wouldn't break my heart again.

"I'm sorry." Louis finally said after a few seconds of silence. "I know you're not ready to trust him and I shouldn't insist."

"Louis, I can't be with someone who doesn't want me." I pointed out after calming down, putting an other cookie on the table as he did the same. "Just because he wanted to kiss me doesn't mean this is love. Lust, maybe. But love is a strong word. He regrets hurting me and he apologized. That was more than what I expected."

"Of course he still loves you."

I looked up at Louis and felt my shoulders fall as I sighed.

"I don't trust Niall's feelings, not after what he did. He probably can't even trust his own feelings, you know?"

"He grew up, he probably learned too, like we did."

We heard the doorbell and I felt suddenly saved. Louis jumped up and sent me a bit smile before rushing to the door., I closed my eyes and breathed in and out deeply. Perhaps Louis was right and Niall still had feelings for me, but I wasn't sure what they were, or what his intentions were. I knew we should have a conversation but I was not mentally prepared for it. I didn't feel strong enough to go through it. I didn't want to hear how he really felt because no matter what it would be, it would either hurt me or force me into making a choice. I was not ready for neither.

                                                      ---

I rushed to the movie theater knowing I was a few minutes late and when I looked up, I noticed Niall waiting for me in the middle of the place, his hands in his pockets. His lips curled when our eyes met and I stopped in front of him, out of breath, my hands on my knees. He laughed and bent down to look at me and my heart skipped a beat when I realized he looked amazing, even from that angle. Who does that? No one.

"Out of breath?" he laughed. "Maybe you should get into shape? How about coming out for a run with me a few times a week?"

"I don't think that a person should run unless he's being chased." I just pointed out, moving up and making him smile even more.

"Okay, an other movie quote." he laughed as I tilted my head.

"Casey and I've got a lot in common."

"Just say you like Elijah Wood."

"Who doesn't?" I rhetorically asked with a frown, a small smile playing on my lips.

We decided on a movie and I felt him grab my fingers as we walked in the hall. I held my breath but he quickly pulled on my hand and made me twirl around. It brought a bunch of memories to my mind and I let out a laughter and squeezed his fingers before letting go of his hand.

We found a spot in the back and I felt suddenly nervous, playing with the fabric of my pants. I knew friends went to the movies together but I didn't want to make all of this awkward. The movie started almost immediately and we didn't really have time to talk but I felt at ease around him, the way I used to. It's only around the middle of the movie that I felt his hand on my knee. He started drawing shapes on my jeans and my lips parted. My heart skipped a beat and I glanced down at his fingers. I didn't know how I should react which resulted in me not doing anything. After a while, I couldn't focus on the movie anymore and closed my eyes, concentrating on how I could still feel his touch even after his fingers were away. The shapes were random... a circle.. an infinite sign (or was it the number 8?).. simple lines... but I never wanted him to stop. I felt my inner thighs start throbbing but weirdly, it didn't feel sexual at all.

I jumped slightly when they turned on the lights again and expected him to take his hand back but it lingered a few more seconds on my knee before he got up and extended it to me. I grabbed it without thinking but let go of his fingers as we walked out only to push them in the back pockets of my jeans.

"Enjoyed the movie?"

I turned my head to look at him and nodded slowly.

"Oh, uhm yea, I did." I sort of lied. "Did you?"

"Was alright."

We walked out and stood in front of each other as everyone else walked by and I couldn't help but glance around. I felt nervous and it was even worse when he took a step closer to me as someone passed really close of him. He looked down at me and I pressed my lips together but we kept silent for a while. To anyone who would take the time to study us, we most likely seemed on a first date but it was so much more complicated than that. And so much deeper, too.

"D'you.. maybe.. want to come home? Food and beer, perhaps?" I proposed with a shrug. "Louis and El are probably there, we could do something with them?"

His lips curled and he nodded. "Yea, yea, that's great, i'll meet you there."

I watched him and held my breath at how beautiful he was. Now that I had confessed out loud that I was still in love with him, it was really all I could think about. It hurt so much and at the same time, it was a relief to admit it to myself.

I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket and took it off only to see a text message from Dylan. My heart skipped a beat like I was doing something wrong and I licked my lips nervously.

'Hey babe, I miss you, I hope we can talk soon.'

I started nibbling on my bottom lip as I typed an answer quickly. I missed him too and I had the feeling that if he was here, it would be easier not to fall even more in love with Niall. Or at least, I could always be reminded of what I could lose.

"Boyfriend?"

Niall's voice took me by surprise and I looked up, sending him a smile.

"Yea, it's the first time we're separated for so long so, we're not really used to it." I expressed with a shrug. "Plus, his days are intensive so when his day is over, he's exhausted and he needs to go to bed because it all starts again on the next day."

"That's why I brought you on tour with me last time." he pointed out. "I hated being away from you."

My lips parted for a few seconds as I kept looking at him and finally, my lips just curled. I hated being away from him too. I could easily remember all the times we were separated and it was horrible, even if we were only friends at that time. I wanted to mention to him that we had been separated for more than a year and also ask him how he felt about it, but I didn't dare.

"I couldn't go with him." I let out, regretting it immediately after. "I was... I'm busy."

He nodded, looking down, and I had the feeling I had hurt him but I was not sure how. I felt something stir in my stomach and cleared my throat.

"Okay well, i'll meet you at my place, you remember where it is?"

His eyes met mine and he smiled again before nodding.

"Mmhm, i'll see you there."

He brought his hand to my arm and I held my breath. His fingers were warm, making it obvious that my arm was cold. His skin against mine, despite my expectations, made me shiver and once again, my lips parted as my heart jumped in my chest. Something in his facial expression changed, too, and deep down, I wished it was the contact of his fingertips on my skin that shocked him, too.

I can't remember the walk to my car, and barely the ride home, but when I parked my car, Niall was already there, waiting for me next to his car, watching something on his phone. I got out and walked to him, a bit sad that his gaze didn't meet mine.

"Hey, what's wrong?"

It took a few more seconds for him to look up but when he did, I knew he had seen something that would bother me. He sighed and turned his phone my way to let me read the title of an online article someone had probably sent him. I noticed the picture first : Niall and I holding hands at the movie theater and the irony made me grimace. Didn't we get papped like that when he was dating Maya and I was with Harry? My eyes finally moved to the title and once again, I held my breath.

'Our favorite couple is back!'

That's when I knew we were both in deep shit. Again.

[vancilocs]

Is new bear and karol too early? 👉🏻👈🏻😳 if ye then phaedra and arad aaand dagon and jame?

i slapped him into existence yesterday but no it isn’t lmao

also i don’t want to leave fifi and arad out so they’re included

1) who can outdrink the other?

Damir by a landslide, dude is massive and Karol gets drunk very rarely anyways

Jarvarad, thicc af. But he doesn’t drink much (Phaedra even less)

Dagon due to sheer size but he doesn’t drink much alcohol, just Mt. Dew

2) who says “I love you” more?

After both are comfortable saying it they both say it a lot but Damir more, after saying it a lot at work it kinda feels fake for Karol to say it for reals

Both say it a lot, Arad ended up saying it more since Phaedra was sadder and sadder as time went on

Neither says it lmao. They’ve said it like once to each other by accident

3) who has trouble sleeping alone?

Both really enjoy having someone with them, and after getting used to the other’s presence neither kinda feels good alone. Karol does have their cat for company

Phaedra for the next thousand or so years

Neither, they do enjoy having the other over but manage well alone

4) who swears more?

Damir is terrible

Neither much, Arad might if he hits himself in the thumb while woodworking

Neither much but Dagon will swear if his code is being a bitch

5) who does more of the housework?

They share, Karol handles the cat

Arad does more physical work like making firewood, carrying water, clearing the yard and whatnot, Phaedra manages the house more and sweeps, cooks, dusts etc.

They do their own thing at their own places.

6) who forgets their anniversary?

Neither

Neither, ever

Neither but idk if they do anything about it. Maybe go out for dinner and Dagon promises to try a new vegetable

7) who steals the duvet in their sleep?

Karol. Spoiled

Neither, they have enough blankets for both and more

Dagon steals an entire Jame in his sleep

8) who keeps the other awake at night with their snoring?

Damir and Karol smacks him with a pillow until he stops

Jarvarad sometimes. Phaedra gently adjusts his position

Neither I don’t think

9) who finds stray animals and begs the other to let them keep them?

Karol already has a cat but that won’t stop them from wanting another

The children bring home an entire hedgehog and Arad is like huh

Neither

10) who usually makes dinner?

Damir makes, Karol orders out

Phaedra and her food is to die for

Jame but Dagon will help as best he can

11) who plays their music out loud?

Both, also Karol is a pianist and Damir plays the guitar so they play together sometimes

Phaedra hums while doing housework

Neither?

12) who hogs the bathroom?

Karol because listen mr. I-have-thirteen-black-t-shirt’s, I’m not leaving this place without at least foundation on

Jarvarad takes his time braiding his hair

Both are very efficient in the bathroom, if anything then shaving takes time and Dagon happens to also have facial hair so

13) who gives the most compliments?

Both are very open with them but given that Karol gets more out of them Damir goes more over-the-top with them

Arad, more outgoing in general than Phaedra

I dunno, I guess Dagon is less reserved and gives compliments other than “food was great, thank you”

14) who usually starts/causes arguments between them?

If Damir isn’t waiting for Karol after work to see them safely home they will flip their shit, thankfully it’s happened like once and he learned what will happen if he’s not there. Damir is 100% cool with Karol’s work but any gifts will stay at the club and if they’re clearly bothered after a certain customer he wouldn’t want them to service whoever it is anymore.

They don’t really argue, if anything just things the other one didn’t do despite promising. Easily resolved though.

Their arguments are very civil, if anything Jame concerned about Dagon’s wellbeing. He’s made some progress but will not learn how to sit properly

15) who isn’t afraid to embarrass the other in public?

Karol will dive inside Damir’s leather jacket any day of the week. Mine. Also since he works as a bartender Karol will definitely go and flirt with him terribly for a time

Phaedra will go where Jarvarad is preparing to go hunt with some other villagers, hand him a homemade treat she baked and kiss him long and deep

They hardly interact in public.

16) who gives the other cringeworthy pet names?

Karol, the mushier the better

Arad sometimes, Fifi is a favorite of his

Neither, they hardly use pet names. 

17) who fusses over takes care of the other when they get sick?

Damir more, Karol doesn’t really know what to do other than bring painkillers and a glass of water and leave him be. 

Phaedra doesn’t fuss, but she’s very adamant on the man staying still, drinking his tea and not overexerting himself. She’s a healer and he puts himself 100% at her mercy

Neither fusses really, Dagon is sick more often and he just accepts it, if Jame wants to come around and bring tea he can

18) who finds it impossible to stay angry at the other for long?

Both, Damir just wants what’s best for them and Karol wants attention and not to see him sad

They resolve their conflicts so fast neither stays angry, Phaedra can hold a bad mood for longer but a nose boop will get rid of it

They’re never really angry at each other, so like no worries about that. Jame is harder to read though so Dagon will think he’s mad at him when he really isn’t

19) who clings to the other for comfort when they’re sad or scared?

Karol will panic at the slightest hint of a threat when out at night and they will dive inside Damir’s leather jacket, uses the man as a weighted blanket, if particularly threatened will call him to come all the way to the club to pick them up (and he will, after he gets out of work)

As time went on Phaedra clung to Arad just because she knew she’d lose him and didn’t know what would happen to her then

The worst thing Dagon went through was finding out his brother died when he himself was in prison and nobody told him, at that point a hug and condolences would go far

20) who is more ‘physically passionate’? (hugs, kisses, or maybe more…)

They are both absolute horndogs and can’t keep their hands off each other

Arad but only within Phaedra’s limits, hugs, little kisses and playing with hair are fine

Dagon is more used to being physical because Kris has no boundaries, so I guess him more as long as Jame shows he’s okay with it

[surveysonfleek]

348.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 1

1. Who are you? dee. 2. What are the 3 most important things everyone should know about you? i live in sydney, i’m 26 and i’m so bored that i’m gna attempt this. 3. When you aren't filling out 5,000 question surveys like this one what are you doing? working, sleeping, eating or hanging out with my boyfriend and/or friends. 4. List your classes in school from the ones you like the most to the ones you like the least (or if you are out of school, think of the classes you did like and didn't like at the time). i liked visual arts the most, religion the least. 5. What is your biggest goal for this year? to find a new job.

6. Where do you want to be in 5 years? hopefully found a good career, married with either kids or planning to have kids. 7. What stage of life are you in right now? i’m still finding myself. 8. Are you more child-like or childish? childish i guess.  9. What is the last thing you said out loud? bye.   10. What song comes closest to how you feel about your life right now? 20 something - sza. 11. Have you ever taken martial arts classes? i did back in 7th grade, quit after i got yellow belt lmao.   12. Does your life tend to get better or worse or does it just stay the same? it’s been the same for the past couple of years. hopefully it’s just better from now on. 13. Does time really heal all wounds? kinda. it definitely eases the ‘pain’. 14. How do you handle a rainy day? i complain if i have to work, i love it if i’m staying home. 15. Which is worse...losing your luggage or having to sort out tangled holiday lights? definitely losing my luggage. 16. How is your relationship with your parents? Will you miss them when they are gone? my relationship with my parents is pretty good. we’re not super close but we all get along. 17. Do you tend to be aware of what is going on around you? usually. 18. What is the truest thing that you know? haha not sure. that i’m currently living this life? 19. What did you want to be when you grew up? a singer or actress even though i couldn’t sing or act. 20. Have you ever been given a second chance? yep. 21. Are you more of a giver or a taker? giver. 22. Do you make your decisions with an open heart/mind? yes. 23. What is the most physically painful thing that has ever happened to you? this weird migraine/virus thing i had a couple years ago. it’s probably the last time in forever i’ve cried because of pain. i’m surprised i didn’t go to the hospital. 24. What is the most emotionally painful thing that has ever happened to you? going through my parents’ separation and having my grandmother die within three months.   25. Who have you hugged today? like five of my friends. 26. Who has done something today to show they care about you? my boyfriend drove us to dinner tonight lol. 27. Do you have a lot to learn? of course. there’s always room to learn. 28. If you could learn how to do three things just by wishing and not by working what would they be? all skills needed for i.t., all skills needed for nursing/doctor, all skills needed for management. 29. Which do you remember the longest: what other people say, what other people do or how other people make you feel? how people make me feel. 30. What are the key ingredients to having a good relationship? basically having the same kind of relationship as best friends and being in love with each other.  31. What 3 things do you want to do before you die? get married, have kids, live to see my grandchildren. 32. What three things would you want to die to avoid doing? pap smears, long plane trips and taking shoes off and laptops out at airport security lol. 33. Is there a cause you believe in more than any other cause? hmm idk lol. gay marriage and feminism. 34. What does each decade make you think of: The 19.. 20's: flapper girls (i could totally be in the wrong decade, my bad) 30's: american gangsters 40's: betty boop 50's: sound of music 60's: marilyn monroe 70's: disco era 80's: neon 90's: grunge 2000: sept 11 2010's: eyebrows 35. Which decade do you feel the most special connection to and why? 90s. i loved my childhood. 36. What is your favorite oldie/classic rock song? bohemian rhapsody. 37. What country do you live in and who is the leader of that country? If you could say any sentence to the current leader of your country what would it be?  australia, malcolm turnbull. make gay marriage legal already. 38. What's your favorite TV channel to watch in the middle of the night? i don’t really have a favourite channel, i just watch certain shows i like.   39. What Disney villain are you the most like and why? ursula hahaha. that makeup tho. 40. Have you ever been a girl scout/boy scout? nope. 41. If you were traveling to another continent would you rather fly or take a boat? definitely fly unless it’s on a luxury cruise ship. 42. Why is the sky blue during the day and black at night? because of the sun. 43. What does your name mean? goddess of wine. 44. Would you rather explore the deeps of the ocean or outer space? neither tbh. i don’t like the depths of the unkown. 45. Word association What is the first word that comes to mind when you see the word: Air: bender Meat: sweats Different: strokes Pink: panther Deserve: more White: dove Elvis: presley Magic: carpet Heart: love Clash: band Pulp: fiction 46. If you could meet any person in the world who is dead who would you want it to be? my grandparents. 47. What if you could meet anyone who is alive? rihanna. 48. Is there a movie that you love so much you could watch it everyday? haha not really. 49. You are going to be stuck alone in an elevator for a week. What do you bring to do? a ton of food, a puzzle book, my kindle, my phone and charger, a bed lol. 50. Have you ever saved someone's life or had your life saved? nope. 51. Make up a definition for the following silly words... Fruitgoogle: a fruit that’ll appear every time you google something and you have to eat it to get the results lol Ambytime: time for an ambulance Asscactus: a cactus in the shape of an ass 52. What was the last thing you made with your own hands? food. 53. What was your favorite toy as a child? probably my cabbage patch doll. 54. How many TV’s are in your house? five. 55. What is your favorite thing to do outside? lie down in the sun. 56. How do you feel when you see a rainbow? happy i guess. i always point it out. 57. Have you ever dreamt a dream that came true? yep. 58. Have you ever been to a psychic/tarot reader? nope. i don’t think i’d want to tbh. 59. What is your idea of paradise? a sunny beach resort that’s all inclusive. 60. Do you believe in god and if so what is he/she/it like? yeah i do, but idk what they’re like. 61. Do you believe in Hell? i think so. 62. What one thing have you done that most people haven't? visit nearly all continents of the world. 63. What is the kindest thing you have ever done? do any favours that weren’t expected of me i guess. 64. Are you a patient person? not really. 65. What holiday should exist but doesn't? ha idk. 66. What holiday shouldn't exist but does? none. 67. What's the best joke you ever heard? i’ve heard plenty, i just don’t have a favourite. 68. Where is the most fun place you have EVER been? disney world! 69. Is your hair natural or dyed? the ends are dyed, otherwise natural. 70. Do you have any deep dark secrets or are you pretty much up front? i’m up front. 71. What is under your bed right now? boxes of junk, presents i never used, a huge bag of hand sanitzers from bath and body works, old uni booked etc. 72. If you were in the Land of Oz would you want to live there or go home? go home thanks. 73. If you drive do you frequently speed? yes. 74. What is the world's best song to dance to? idk haha. 75. What song was on the last time you danced with someone? i forgot. 76. Do you prefer Disney or Warner Brothers? disney. 77. What is the first animal you would run to see if you went to the zoo? panda. i don’t think i’ve ever seen one in real life. 78. Would you consider yourself to be romantic? not really. 79. If the earth stopped rotating would we all fly off? no idea. 80. What is the one thing that you love to do so much that you would make sacrifices to be able to do it? traveling. saving money to travel is a bitch, not to mention getting time off from your job etc. 81. If you (and everyone) had to lose one right or freedom, but you could pick which one everyone had to lose, what would you pick? idk tbh. 82. If you had to choose would you live on the equator or at the North Pole? equator. 83. Would you rather give up listening to music or watching television? errrr. that’s hard. watching tv i guess. since i watch all my shows on my laptop anyway. 84. What do you think makes someone a hero? doing something good for the masses and being inspirational. 85. What cartoon would you like to be a character in? aladdin. 86. Name one thing that turns your stomach: bad smells. 87. What was the last thing you paid for? dinner. 88. Are you a coupon clipper? nah, we never get any good coupons here. 89. Get anything good in the mail recently? yeah, my purchase from ebay. 90. Which would you rather take as a gym class...dancing, sailing, karate, or bowling? bowling lol. 91. In Star Trek people 'beam' back and forth between different places. What this means is they stand in a little tube and their molecules are deconstructed and sent to another tube somewhere else where they are reassembled. Only problem is when the molecules are deconstructed the person is dead. When they are put back together it is only a clone that has all the dead person's memories. So... Is the person who gets beamed the same person on both ends? physically no... it’s like that ship paradox i guess. 92. What insects are you afraid of? cockroaches. 93. If you could print any phrase on a T-shirt, what would it say? nothing to wear. 94. What's the most eccentric thing you have ever worn? cat ears? lol it was for halloween. 95. If you could pick one food that you could eat all you wanted but it would have no effect on how much you weigh, what food would it be? hotdogs. actually ribs. 96. What are your parents interested in? they love tv shows and movies. my dad loves fishing too lol. 97. Have you ever caught an insect and kept it as a pet?  Have you ever caught and tamed a wild animal? no and no. 98. What is more helpful to you, wishes or plans? plans definitely. i’m too lazy to make my wishes come true. 99. When do you feel your life energy the strongest? when i’m the most awake? 100. You are spending the night alone in the woods and may bring only 3 items with you. What do you bring? a tent, bed and food.

[repressed-to-impress]

The rainbow with grey, white, and black on the end!!

omG hi fren! this for you,, my lord,, with love 💖

Red ~ 5 facts about my best friend

how about I do 5 facts about my good old fren ………..steve

一　when I first met you I was like: wow I like this person,, I want to be their friend (and now look: frens!)

二    *stalks your tumblr every morning as soon as I wake up rather than being a productive human being and functioning member of society*

三    You have the best hair out of everyone that I know (except maybe k80). Honestly, I get more compliments from people about your hair than I do about my hair 😂 

++You also have the best taste in music out of everyone I know. Congrats, you are the most emo!!

四    pretty sure more people think were dating than people who don't 

五    I message you more than I message anyone else. Even if you were to combine like 3 of my other frens, you’d still win.

Orange ~ 6 facts about my home town

一　the twenty one pilots song is better ngl

二　we have a kinda shitty lake that you’d probably contract like 4 STIs from if you were to ever swim in it

三　one good thing about it is that every september they have gay pride events on for like a week in and around the city

四　if you watch literally any New Zealand film they probably talk shit about it at least once. at least.

五　#1 stop for car sale yards

六　My home is in this town

Yellow ~ 7 facts about my childhood

一 I was raised to be really religious but now I’m just really gay

二 was taught to disregard my feelings and repress them and now I’m depressed whoops

三 I was the really smart kid.

四 I don’t really remember that much lmao

五 I had a crush on pink when I was about 6

六 apparently I went up to my aunt once and gave her a flower and said: “Chris said to give this to you. He doesn’t want you to be sad anymore.” a few weeks after her boyfriend, Chris, died.

七 I remember saying: draco malfoy is kinda cute and my mum replying: thank god you’re straight (c. 2007)

Green ~ 8 facts about my body

一 I had these two stretch marks on my thigh and they decided they wanted to be friends so now they’re connected *boop*

二 According to a lot of people I have really soft hands? So everyones like wow let me touch your hands and I’m like ??Ok. Despite this I only hold hands with like 2 people. sigh.

三 I have a freckle thing on my left shoulder.

四 I have a single ab, it is very precious to me.

五 i’m lowkey very self conscious,,,

六 I have a fivehead so i’m pretty sure Brendon Urie is my biological father

七 I’m right handed 

八 ain’t got no tits lol

Blue ~ 9 3 facts about my family

ima add the other 6 to other questions

一 I have two younger (half) sisters

二 One of them is like 5 years younger than me but the same height (and i’m 5 7″ yikes)

三 Just found out my cool aunty was a huge fall out boy + my chem fan back in the day and I am s h o o k

Purple ~ 10 5 facts about my room

yikes okay thats a lot how about 5

一  I have a lot of shit everywhere, on everything, over everything, inside everything. It’s a mess but so am I so it’s fine.

二 I really want to decorate my room bc it’s very plain. Also kinda pink and ew.

三 I just noticed someone put a mason jar on my dresser and I never saw it there before.

四 I have a stack of The Sims 3+4 games

五  I spend a lot of time in here, in my bed, in the warm, listening to music + looking at memes.

Pink ~ 4 facts about my parents

一 Brendon Urie is my dad

二 Gerard Way is also my dad

三 Tyler Joseph and Josh Dun are also my dads

四 I have a lot of dads

Grey ~ 2 7 facts about my favourite things

gotta add the 5 from the other thing

一 I like it when cats sit on me and purr and get all comfy its like 

二 Also favourite thing: when you hold someone’s hand and their hand fits so nicely in your hand,,,

三 hot chocolates + gingernut biscuits are the literal best

四 you

五 watching the sun set over the ocean, I did it once and i’ve always wanted to do it again.

White ~ 3 5 facts about my personality

+2 because I have a great personality

一 I’m good at giving hugs

二 Apparently i’m really nice and approachable? despite me being terrified of human interaction??

三 According to like 2 adults I have very good leadership skills and i’m very intuitive???

四 Not gonna lie, i’m actually very stupid at times. If anyone ever wants to tell me something, like, if they’re trying to hint at something, chances are i’m not going to catch on. either that or i’m not confident enough to allow myself to do so or just be like: nah…. they ain’t… they ain’t serious… that ain’t what they mean

五 I like memes

Black ~ 1 5 facts about the person I like

~should probably put in some actual facts rather than just me gushing lmao~

一 I’ve liked them for like… a few months? (I’m kidding I know the exact time period) and it has been some of the best x amount of months.

二 could drag me through hell if it meant I could hold her hand (again)

三 TALENTED as HECK

四 fact: should love me back so we can hold hands and adopt puppies and live happily ever after

五 my taste in music is your face

if you would like to know more about this person, inquire here.

and, thats a wrap. I do hope you enjoyed.

much love, your fair lady, pebble 💞.

[ichibanjeon]

Ten Dos and Ten Don'ts of dating Min Yoongi

i think i’m funny, jungkook’s a brat; the usual. happy birthday to me lmao

a complete guide on what to do and not to do if you happen to be dating a man called min yoongi, brought to you by yoongi’s favorite brat, jeon jungkook.

word count: 1,306 | AO3

Disclaimer: Jeon Jungkook does not take responsibility for Yoongi’s actions, and therefore should not be held accountable for any negative reactions his boyfriend might have, as Yoongi’s levels of tolerance towards Jungkook – and towards Jungkook only – exceed all expectations.

TEN DOs

1. Do stay up texting him until ungodly hours, when you know or feel that he’s still at the studio.

Yoongi rolls his eyes when he hears the familiar sound of a message app notification. He should go home, he really should. Smiling and shaking his head, he leaves the studio. Jungkook’s cuddles are a tempting offer….

2. Do kiss him out of nowhere

Kiss his nose

They’re both giggly messes on Sunday mornings, shy sunrays tickling their skin. Jungkook struggles a bit, but manages to get on top of Yoongi. His face is close, so close, and his lips brush against Yoongi’s nose.

Kiss his head

It’s late, and they should be sleeping. Instead, they managed to sneak out of the dorms, so Yoongi can show Jungkook his recent works. They’re wearing baggy t-shirts and sweatpants, and the older boy put on a beanie because the nights are getting colder. Jungkook’s chin is not far from being buried in the beanie, as he listens to the new melodies, and that’s when the maknae takes a turn and kisses the side of Yoongi’s head. He did well (he always does).

Kiss his lips

“Listen up, hyung,” Hoseok starts, during breakfast, “I need you to stop being so cute together all the time.”

Yoongi isn’t sure of how to react to such a complaint. He doesn’t have time to, because Jungkook’s walking in the second after, kissing his lips, letting out a quiet “good morning, hyungs” and leaving again.

Yoongi’s flustered and Hoseok can’t stop giggling.

3. Do either:

Conveniently forget to call him hyung…

“I guess we can’t go out today,” Jimin says, pouting. They were all excited about their day off.

“Yoongi and I are going to watch a couple of movies,” Jungkook says, “does anyone wanna join?”

It’s not even a big deal anymore. Yoongi lets out a “you damn brat”, but everyone sees right through him. Jungkook snickers quietly.

…or call him hyung every five minutes

“Sorry, Jungkook, I really can’t take you today,” Seokjin says, sighing.

“It’s okay,” Jungkook replies, “Suga-hyung can do it.”

Seokjin certainly doesn’t miss the way Yoongi drops whatever he was doing (reading this one book he couldn’t shut up about just the previous week) to look at the maknae.

“Could you take me please, Suga-hyung?” Jungkook asks, using a sweet tone that could be aegyo.

(Yoongi will never admit he always falls for it).

4. Do offer to take him out for lamb skewers meals when you both have time

Jungkook has a towel wrapped around his waist and he’s singing off-key as he exits the bathroom after his late night shower.

Yoongi’s bedroom’s door is open. He’s lying down and listening to music before he goes to sleep. That is, before a particular head peaks from the hall.

“You and me, lamb skewers, tomorrow?”

“Sure,” Yoongi says. What a boy.

5. Do try to surprise him

“Happy birthday to you!” Jungkook sings and plays the final note on the keyboard.

Yoongi is a somewhere between extremely surprised and beyond proud. “Where did you learn that?” he asks.

“I looked it up online and practiced whenever you were out,” the other admits sheepishly.

“You could have just asked me,” Yoongi says, “thank you.”

6. Do pretend you know nothing about the pictures of you he secretly keeps

“Jungkook, let me take a picture of you,” Yoongi calls, pausing the show he’s watching.

“Why?” the other asks. It’s not that he’s bothered; he just knows for a fact that Yoongi’s phone has a ton of pictures of him.

“Your birthday’s coming up and I only have a few pictures of you to post.”

“Sure,” Jungkook agrees. He understands; he does the same with Yoongi.

7. Do tap his butt lightly (and check his reaction)

He’s used to it, but he still jumps whenever he feels Jungkook’s hand tap his butt. When he starts to protest, he younger giggles and runs away. Yoongi shakes his head, but he can’t hide the smile on his face.

8. Do support his efforts, even when he doubts himself

“Come on Yoongi, try again,” Jungkook says, tugging on the older’s sleeve.

“It’s no use, I can’t get it right,” Yoongi sighs. He’s been trying to learn this particular move for an hour, with Jungkook’s help.

“Hey,” the younger says softly, smiling down at the other, “you can do this.”

9. Do share your dreams and hopes with him

“And do you think Gureum and Holly will like this new dog?” Yoongi asks.

“Why wouldn’t they? I think there’s always room for a new dog,” Jungkook answers, yawning.

“You are such a dork. A cute one, but a dork,” the older says, turning to meet the other’s tired eyes.

“Joke’s on you, because you’re going to marry this cute dork one day.” Jungkook is already half asleep, but his words still hit Yoongi.

“Yes, yes I am,” he thinks.

10. Do love him unconditionally

“And I will always love yooooooouuu,” Jungkook sings.

Yoongi rolls his eyes.

“That’s not gonna be the wedding’s opening song.”

“Come on, live a little,” Jungkook pouts, but immediately starts singing again.

TEN DON’Ts

1. Do not borrow his favorite camera without telling him

“Jungkook, have you seen my camera?” Yoongi asks, walking in the maknae’s room, only to find him holding it.

“It was a good shot, hyung,” he says, turning around.

2. Do not expose or tease him publicly

Self-explanatory. A good example would be Yoongi’s birthday video.

3. Do not steal his clothes

Not only does Jungkook do this often, but he also walks around the dorms asking everyone if they like his new hoodie/beanie/jacket/cap/anything.

Yoongi sighs and secretly snaps a picture of it. He thinks it’s adorable.

4. Do not show anyone the pictures you have with/of him

"And here, hyung, we have Yoongi sleeping next to Holly,” Jungkook says, pointing at his phone’s screen.

Yoongi's horrified expression is the first thing Jungkook sees when he looks up.

5. Do not call him anything like “shorty”

“Shorty, remember we’re having lunch out today” is a text Yoongi gets often. It doesn’t even bother him anymore.

6. Do not boop his nose (because you think it’s cute)

Although it’s a habit Jungkook has, whenever Yoongi can’t see it coming.

7. Do not act smug around him

“Remember that one time you said I was good at everything?” Jungkook says, during lunch.

“Are we really doing this right now?”

“Oh wait, that happens all the time,” the maknae says, leaning back in his chair.

8. Do not be too obvious about your thoughts on his performances

It’s the third time Jungkook watches the fancam but Yoongi’s verse still makes him gulp and hold his breath and he remembers why he fell in love all over again.

“So I was thinking- what are you doing?” Yoongi walks in.

“N-nothing,” he tries, but Yoongi grabs the phone and his curious expression is quickly replaced by an amused one.

He has teased Jungkook about it ever since.

9. Do not ruffle his hair

Along with booping Yoongi’s nose, ruffling his hair is on the List Of Things You’ll Never Get Away With If You’re Not Jeon Jungkook.

10. Do not hurt him in any way

“I don’t think I could ever hurt you on purpose, you know,” Yoongi says, “maybe a few smacks here and there, nothing serious.”

“That’s good to know, Yoongi,” Jungkook speaks from the older’s lap, eyes closed as the wind messes his hair up. “Because I’d never hurt you either.”

[junkcrs]

GIMMIE ALL THE ANSWERS MY DUDE

Oh fuck off LMAO

1. Who is your defense main?Mei?? Junkrat??? I definitely have more hours on Junkrat lmao, but if we’re playing comp y’know I’m all about that gold gun Mei

2. Who is your support main?Imma go with Lucio, even though I play every healers at least decently, he’s my top played boy at what... 110 hours? from a flex players that’s a lot yknow

3. Who is your offense main?No thanks, I don’t have that much fun with DPS man, Pharah or Soldier are my best ones bc ez tbh LMAO

4. Who is your tank main?Trick question, all of them. I have the gold hammer but who doesn’t. Playing a shit ton of Winston too, have an impressive amount of hours on DVA and I am (was?? lmao) a solid hog. I play Zarya out of necessity in comp sometimes. Only one I don’t play is Orisa

5. Who is you MAIN main?Uh. IDK. Depends on if it’s QP or Comp. Like... Junkrat is in my top 3 most played and yet I never touched him in comp, etc. I just call myself a tank main ngl.... who has the most hours on Lucio I guess LMAO

6. Which character have you played the least?Orisa, then I think it’s Bastion, both under an hour

7. Which character do you want to learn how to play?Idk I’m pretty satisfied with my character pool, I GUESS a real decent dps but that’s lame

8. Which character do you dislike the most?Tracer whenever she talks tbh... Or Zarya but that’s just because I really don’t give a shit about Zarya

9. Which character’s background story do you like the most?Everyone knows it’s Hog lmfao, it’s so good dude like very little is said about it but at the same time there’s just so much and then so much more when you decide to really stop and think about it. Honorable mention @ winston too

10. Which character’s background story do you like the least?Hmmm there are quite a lot I just straight up find not interesting, Zarya, once again. Or like Pharah I’m so just...  lukewarm about it lmfao. I know literally 96% of the fandom disagrees but idc

11. Which map is your favorite?King’s Row, Numbani, Eichenwalde... Hybrids maps my dude. Lijiang except control point. Also in QP, Anubis defense is the stupidest shit

12. Which map is your least favorite?Oasis & Route 66

13. What Arcade game type is your favorite?Mystery heroes lmaaaao

14. What Arcade game type is your least favorite?Total Mayhem is.... not fun

15. Do you prefer quick play, competitive, arcade mode, or custom games?QP is my go to, but I love comp, especially since I stopped caring

16. Which map type is your favorite? Assault, escort, assault & escort, control, or arena?Hybrids, ez. Then KOTH, 

17. Which map type is your least favorite? Assault, escort, assault & escort, control, or arena?2CP tends to be pretty stale sometimes

18. Which event map was your favorite?Uprising is such an easy win. Fun PvE without getting repetitive  like Halloween

19. Which event map reskin was your favorite?Christmas King’s Row, it was so pretty man. I also really really liked spooky Hollywoods. Holiday themed maps are just fun

20. Which event was your favorite?I think Halloween was the one I had the most fun honestly, not so much the event but the winposes matching and it was the first time a map got reskinned and I remember just going through the map with my friends while we were all freaking out about it

21. Which event legendary skin was your favorite?Cruiser D.Va, Bajie Hog, Ironclad Torb, Witch Mercy.

22. Which event was your least favorite?Summer Games was pretty.... ok? Idk the lucioball was fun but beside that it was aight at best. Or maybe the anniversary event but then again nah... cuz the emotes and skins were on point.

23. Which event legendary skin was your least favorite?I GUESS Null Sector Orisa because it takes away her face and expressions like... pls.... give the ^ ^ back

24. Which event non-legendary skin was your favorite?Mako Hog, Junker DVa, Sunyatta Zen, Deadlock Torb, Daredevil 76 :^)

25. Which event non-legendary skin was your least favorite?Goth Zarya probably LMAO even though I sometimes use them just because theyre so laughably bad. Young shimada bros ain’t great either IMO, but I use young Hanzo because I only play Hanzo as a joke and I like getting the potg with the highlight intro where his hair is just blocking his entire face

26. Which event item do you most regret not getting?Junkrat’s intro 8( and all the voicelines i forgot to buy. 

27. Did you beat the Uprising event on Normal, Hard, Expert, and Legendary?Hard definitely, maybe expert? IDK I didnt especially try to get the achievements so idk

28. Do you have Sombra’s “Power Outage” achievement?Doubt it I don’t really play her

29. Do you have Widowmaker’s “Smooth as Silk” achievement?Yeah I remember I jumped off a roof while being chased by a reaper and just headshot him on the way down

30. Do you have Lucio’s “The Floor is Lava” achievement?Yeah, got it in comp on LiJiang it was great

31. Do you have Zenyatta’s “Rapid Discord” achievement?Yeah, Overtime Gibraltar is pretty fun

32. What was the first achievement you got? how the fuck do u expect me to remember this. The only achievement I clearly remember getting in the beta was junkrat one with the mine into trap thing but I know thats not the first

33. Did you get the “Not A Scratch,” achievement on Junkenstein’s Revenge?I dont think so

34. What has been the hardest achievement to get for you?Reaper solo kills lmfao

35. What’s your current SR score in Competitive Mode?Uuuh something around 2600? Idk I’ve been pretty bad LMAO especially since I get disconnects a lot :/ and also dont grind comp

36. What the highest you’ve been in Competitive?Diamond something like 3150 or so

37. What’s the most amount of placement matches you’ve won?7? Maybe?

38. How many gold guns do you have?Two, Rein and Mei

39. Which was the first gold gun you got?Big Hammer, bc it’s so obvious and I like smacking people with it

40. Whose gold gun do you currently want?I kind of always wanted the gold hook(tm) but now I’m not too sure with the nerfs :/ Maybe Winston LMAO

41. What role do you usually play in Competitive?Tank, or heals especially if its a KOTH map because of all these boops potentials

42. If you don’t play Competitive, why not?I do tho

43. What kind of theme event would you like to see in the future?Horrible beach party where no one has an actual revealing swimsuit save for roadhog

44. What type of character would you like to see in the future?More healers tbh, I’ve seen a lot of people ask for an evil healer and yea that sounds great

45. Who needs more (or better) skins in the future?See the logical answer would be widow or zarya yknow but no i mostly just want more junkrat even skins

46. What country would you like a new character to come from?Give us a french canadian hero

47. Favorite voice line?Junkrat’s multikills voicelines are what fuels me, Come out and play is a fave, and the ouverture singing. And Road and Rein just laughing at multikills too man

48. Favorite player icon?Have fish masterrace

49. Favorite emote?Lucio’s dance, Roadhog’s sit, Junkrat’s sit, Roadhog’s headbanging, Winston’s PB, Ana’s Candy

50. Favorite spray?PUNCH KID MASTERRACE

51.Favorite victory pose?I like when everyone is just squatting

52. Favorite highlight intro?I like all the ones where they shove their guns in your face so you can see how gold it is

53. Characters you ship the most?No I, don’t care............ I only ship Winston and happiness y’know it. I’m ok with some ships but I truly do not actively ship anything nor care about it

54. Characters you ship the least?Junkrat x anything makes me uncomfortable as all hell, I’ve never been so attached to another character not being interested in romance before, it just rubs me the wrong way. a lot

55. Characters you wish had more in-game interactions?Roadhog and anyone, don’t get me wrong, I love how he just doesn’t talk to anyone except junkrat (and mccree once to threaten him) and just talks to himself, but pls lmao. Also more torb and rein pls, their interactions are so fucking good lmao

56. Character you wish had a comic about?Lucio

57. Favorite comic released?Going Legit or the Bastion one

58. Favorite short released?Last Bastion

59. Favorite new character released?Grandma’s pretty tight

60. Overwatch, Blackwatch, or Talon?Uh Talon, I guess? Probs overwatch tho because at least we know what’s their goal beside ‘lmao we’re bad guys’

61. Pro-Omnic or anti-Omnic?I’m pro omnic yall know it

62. Favorite character that isn’t a playable one? (Ex: Emily, Brigitte, Gerard, Efi, etc.)Athena

63. Character change (nerf, boost, work around) that you liked the most?No more Junkrat self damage is fucking hilarious, and the whole Lucio changes are fucking incredibly fun

64. Character change (nerf, boost, work around) you liked the least?Roadhog 8( FeelsBadMan

65. Best ultimate?Rein is easily my fave one. It can be absolutely useless or you can get a team wipe with it if you use it well. It’s so satisfying

66. Worst ultimate?I would’ve said McCree but now it’s actually pretty good. Gotta say Hanzo’s pretty fucking horrid lmao

67. Most kills in game?shit lemme go see... In QP it’s 41 with Hog, in comp it’s 58 with D.Va ( I once got 50 with Lucio?? lmao )

68. Most heals in game?In QP, 16.8K with Lucio and in comp 37K with... also Lucio

69. What character do you think needs a nerf? D.Va’s DM probably...... lmao or a slight rework at least

70. What character do you think needs a buff?I’d really like if the hook cooldown for hog went back to 6 seconds, or listen... I’d love for torb to be actually decent, could you imagine... 

71. Have you ever rage quit in the middle of a game?Nope lmao

72. What’s the fastest you’ve won a game?Like a minute and a half on Volkskaya or something

73. What’s the fastest you’ve lost a game?Probably the same thing

74. Your best Overwatch-related story?I met some of my best friends through it, yes yes im looking at you, rayan :^)

75. Weirdest thing that happened to you on Overwatch?One night I got matched against all of my irl friends it was great and completely random

76. Platform you play on?PC, I own it on ps4 as a joke but it’s awful, I’m awful. lmao

77. Do you stream?If people asks 

78. Do you normally play solo or with friends?Friends usually, I don’t mind playing alone tho

79. Have you made any friends because of Overwatch?So many

80. Have you cosplayed a character from Overwatch?Nope, I’d make a nice mei tho i have the same glasses and i also happen to be evil

81. Have you ever wrote fan fiction about Overwatch?I never wrote fanfiction lmao but my blog... lmao

82. What’s the lowest you’ve been in Competitive?2400? 2300? we don’t talk about the end of season 4

83. In “All Brawls,” if you get “Charge!” do you play Reinhardt or do you pick the Lucio role?I don’t think I’ve ever played that, but I’d play lucio just for the boops

84. In “All Brawls,” if you get “One Shot, One ,” do you play Ana, Hanzo, or Widowmaker?Havent played either, id be fine with anyone tho 

85. In “All Brawls,” if you get “This is Ilios,” do you pick Lucio or Roadhog?i dont play brawls idk.......... lucio bc i can just jump on roadhogs heads and be safe

86. Team Genji or Team Hanzo?Team idc about shimada bros im so sorry

87. Be honest! Do you usually get on the payload?Im top 1% objective time lucio baby

88. Does your team?yeah cuz i dont play with morons lmao, even randoms im usually pretty lucky

89. What’s the longest session of Overwatch you’ve played?I dont think I want to know

90. No Limits, Mystery Heroes, or Total Mayhem?Mystery Heroes, ez

91.Most cosmetics you have for one character?I have most of cosmetics for everyone

92. Least cosmetics you have for one character?Orisa, she’s new

93. Have you ever made your own custom game?Nope

94. Best D.Va skin?Bruiser

95. Best Mercy skin?Witch? I think

96. Best Tracer skin?How about.... none........ jk the latest one was decent

97. Zarya’s Industrial and Cybergoth skins: yes, no, or HELL NO?all day everyday

98. Do you want more animal character, robot characters, or human characters?JET PACK CAT. id be down for... one more animal character, otherwise thatd be too much. another robot eventually, though we just got one. im fine with humans

99. Is there are character you’d get rid of completely?widow tbh, i dont care for her much lorewise, she’s french and also either 1. they’re mostly useless in a match or 2. good and simply unfun to play against

100. What do you think Sombra’s real name is?idk lmao ive never really bothered to think about that

[psyadrin]

Ok for that overwatch thing,,,,, a l l

1. Who is your defense main? Mei and/or Widowmaker, maybe Hanzo.

2. Who is your support main? Idk, I like playing Ana the most.

3. Who is your offense main? Reaper!!

4. Who is your tank main? Dorito rabbit aka D.Va

5. Who is you MAIN main? D.Va

6. Which character have you played the least? 

Torb, Winston, Roadhog (all of them are at 0 minutes)

7. Which character do you want to learn how to play? 

Sombra, Tracer, Genji, Pharah, Bastion, Orisa, Zarya 

8. Which character do you dislike the most? I actually like all of them.

9. Which character’s background story do you like the most? 

Bastion, Orisa, Widowmaker, Genji/Hanzo, Mei

10. Which character’s background story do you like the least? Sombra.

11. Which map is your favorite? Black Forest.

12. Which map is your least favorite? NUMBANI.

13. What Arcade game type is your favorite? Lockout 3v3

14. What Arcade game type is your least favorite? Mystery Heroes

15. Do you prefer quick play, competitive, arcade mode, or custom games?

Quick Play and comp, but comp > QP. QP is pretty much the way I like to relax and spend time with my boyfriend by messing around with the people and get achievements. It’s pretty much a huge meme parade when we play quick play and I like that. That way we can talk, make jokes and that stuff whilst still accomplishing things.

16. Which map type is your favorite? Assault, escort, assault & escort, control, or arena?

Control, probably.

17. Which map type is your least favorite? Assault, escort, assault & escort, control, or arena?

Assault & escort

18. Which event map was your favorite? Hm, I’m guessing this means like the Uprising!KR and Halloween!Eichenwalde? If so, I like both very much!

19. Which event map reskin was your favorite? 

Winter!Hanamura AND Winter!KR, top notch, really!

20. Which event was your favorite? 

Halloween Terror, Uprising (for Reyes’s pre-Reaper voice if nothing else) and Anniversary.

21. Which event legendary skin was your favorite? Cruiser, Jazzy and Pumpkin

22. Which event was your least favorite? 

Summer Games 2016, because fuck that loot system back then. Hopefully they bring it back and let me buy the old skins.

23. Which event legendary skin was your least favorite? 

Cyborg: 76 and Cyberian. OH, and Ironclad. Y’know, fuckboi torb?

24. Which event non-legendary skin was your favorite? Nevermore.

25. Which event non-legendary skin was your least favorite? Stunt Rider: 76

26. Which event item do you most regret not getting? 

Order by event: Reaper’s BMX icon/ Nihon (SG16), Coldhardt (HT), Mei’s Snowman emote (Winter), Rein’s skin,, Wujing I think? (CNY), Cadet Oxton (Uprising), Oasis (Anniversary)

27. Did you beat the Uprising event on Normal, Hard, Expert, and Legendary?

Hell, no! Wish I had, I tried so hard for Expert!!

28. Do you have Sombra’s “Power Outage” achievement? Yep, after 2 hours or so.

29. Do you have Widowmaker’s “Smooth as Silk” achievement? Yes, idefk how.

30. Do you have Lucio’s “The Floor is Lava” achievement? Working on it.

31. Do you have Zenyatta’s “Rapid Discord” achievement? 

Eh, I have like 3 minutes on Zen, no.

32. What was the first achievement you got? 

Aside from that basic “Play a game with a friend” or “Reach level 10″ bullshit, it was Reaper’s cute spray.

33. Did you get the “Not A Scratch,” achievement on Junkenstein’s Revenge? 

Yes, and I’m proud of it. I also have the Hard mode achievement. In fact, I have all Halloween achievements.

34. What has been the hardest achievement to get for you? 

Mh, Junkenstein’s Revenge “Held The Door” (Hard mode). I think it took me 4 hours of playing nothing but hard mode??

35. What’s your current SR score in Competitive Mode? 1521, don’t ask.

36. What the highest you’ve been in Competitive? 1956.

37. What’s the most amount of placement matches you’ve won? Nine.

38. How many gold guns do you have? Zero.

39. Which was the first gold gun you got? Are you mocking me?

40. Whose gold gun do you currently want? D.Va’s. After that I might go for Ana’s Biotic Rifle or a golden Widow rifle.

41. What role do you usually play in Competitive? Tank or support.

42. If you don’t play Competitive, why not? N/A

43. What kind of theme event would you like to see in the future? DOOMFIST.

44. What type of character would you like to see in the future? DOOMFIST. 

45. Who needs more (or better) skins in the future? 

Hanzo, Widowmaker. Give my sniper babes a bit of love. And Reaper.

46. What country would you like a new character to come from? Austria or Italy.

47. Favorite voice line? 

Sorted by character (mains only)

[Reaper]“I’ll see you in hell.”

[D.Va] “I get the feeling you’re not taking me seriously.”

[Ana] “More lost than the moon in winter.”

[Lucio] “Have some Lucio-oh’s!” and “Boop!”

[Mercy] “Questionable judgement.”

[Mei] “I’m going to have to science the heck out of this.”

[WM] “Your emotions make you vulnerable.”

[Hanzo] “I choose you, spirit dragon.”

48. Favorite player icon? uuuuuh, The Reaper.

49. Favorite emote? Most dance emotes, SHRUG, and FINGER GUNS

50. Favorite spray? any cute spray I have

51.Favorite victory pose? *shrug* ahahahah… ha

52. Favorite highlight intro? Selfie, Death Blossom, Ssh

53. Characters you ship the most? Bunnyribbit (Lúcio x D.Va)

54. Characters you ship the least? Shimadacest

55. Characters you wish had more in-game interactions? 

D.Va/Lúcio, Orisa/Bastion, Widow/Hanzo

56. Character you wish had a comic about? uhh, every character deserves a comic.

57. Favorite comic released? Uprising, Reflections.

58. Favorite short released? The Last Bastion.

59. Favorite new character released? Ana.

60. Overwatch, Blackwatch, or Talon? Blackwatch or Talon, tbh. 

61. Pro-Omnic or anti-Omnic? Pro!

62. Favorite character that isn’t a playable one? (Ex: Emily, Brigitte, Gerard, Efi, etc.)

Emily! Lenily is just so pure and I need more!

63. Character change (nerf, boost, work around) that you liked the most? 

Lúcio and Bastion 2.0

64. Character change (nerf, boost, work around) you liked the least? Ana’s nerfs tbh

65. Best ultimate? 

Every ultimates has its uses! My favorites are Resurrection, Death Blossom and Self Destruct though.

66. Worst ultimate? Infra-Sight. It’s not bad, just not my favorite.

67. Most kills in game? 53.

68. Most heals in game? um,, i dont remember. 

69. What character do you think needs a nerf? Sym’s beam range.

70. What character do you think needs a buff? Currently I’m satisfied with most heroes.

71. Have you ever rage quit in the middle of a game? 

Unfortunately, yes. Not in comp though.

72. What’s the fastest you’ve won a game? 2:03

73. What’s the fastest you’ve lost a game? around the same as won

74. Your best Overwatch-related story? 

Hmm, I’ll never forget how my boyfriend went Symmetra on Hollywood Defense and put down his last teleporter right in front of the very first enemy spawn and we basically just sat there waiting for some poor souls to walk through it. A Zarya and Genji happened to do so and were greeted by a Sym sitting on a stool and me as a dancing Sombra. It was great.

75. Weirdest thing that happened to you on Overwatch? 

A friend and I encountered a guy who called me a cunt for killing him in a match and who insisted that my friend would add him as a battlenet friend. That guy proceeded to call me “Black Jerome” (before he learned that I’m female) and “White Jessica” (after he had learned I’m a female).

76. Platform you play on? PC.

77. Do you stream? Wish I could, but my PC is shit.

78. Do you normally play solo or with friends? 

Normally, I play with my boyfriend, otherwise I play solo.

79. Have you made any friends because of Overwatch? 

In fact, I met all of my current friends thanks to OW and a little AU called Retailwatch.

80. Have you cosplayed a character from Overwatch? Sadly, no.

81. Have you ever wrote fan fiction about Overwatch? Yes.

82. What’s the lowest you’ve been in Competitive? 1100.

83. In “All Brawls,” if you get “Charge!” do you play Reinhardt or do you pick the Lucio role? Lúcio.

84. In “All Brawls,” if you get “One Shot, One Kill,” do you play Ana, Hanzo, or Widowmaker? Idc.

85. In “All Brawls,” if you get “This is Ilios,” do you pick Lucio or Roadhog?

Lúcio.

86. Team Genji or Team Hanzo? Team Hanzo.

87. Be honest! Do you usually get on the payload? I think I do???

88. Does your team? Nope.

89. What’s the longest session of Overwatch you’ve played? Friday 11pm - Saturday 6pm

90. No Limits, Mystery Heroes, or Total Mayhem? Total Mayhem.

91.Most cosmetics you have for one character? 73 for both Reaper and D.Va

92. Least cosmetics you have for one character? 20+ (Orisa)

93. Have you ever made your own custom game? No.

94. Best D.Va skin? Cruiser (event), Scavenger (normal)

95. Best Mercy skin? Witch (event), Imp (normal)

96. Best Tracer skin? Graffiti (event), Ultraviolet (normal)

97. Zarya’s Industrial and Cybergoth skins: yes, no, or HELL NO? 

honestly, yes, they’re my favorite Zarya skins.

98. Do you want more animal character, robot characters, or human characters? 

I’d love to see more robot characters!! But to be frank, I just want more characters LMAO

99. Is there are character you’d get rid of completely? 

Not really, they’re all precious in their own ways.

100. What do you think Sombra’s real name is? obvs something Spanish, idk

are you happy now, ken? this took me an hour to answer

[junker-town]

The 101 best moments of the 2016-17 NBA season

The long NBA season produced so many incredible moments. Here are our favorites.

The 2016-17 NBA season ends on Wednesday. Well, the regular season ends. The playoffs begin on Saturday. We tend to remember seasons by what happens in the postseason, even when the 82 are filled with surprise and wonder.

This year we decided to celebrate the regular season at its close, before the playoffs wash our brains with new achievements. We’re taking a moment to acknowledge the amazing things that happened over the last six months before we devour and catalog what happens over the next two.

These moments are listed in NO PARTICULAR ORDER, and we apologize if your favorite moment (or team) isn’t represented. Please share those moments in the comments! We’re sure we missed some. With 1,230 games to recall — not including Wednesday’s finales — things are bound to fall through the cracks.

But we are confident these 101 unforgettable moments are worth remembering. They are sorted into convenient (and sometimes overlapping) categories and numbered. We apologize to your phones and hope you enjoy.

DAGGERS

Let’s open at the close with the most memorable daggers of the year.

1. James Harden’s sprinting game-winner

Harden is an MVP favorite, so he leads the list. This slaloming full-court, one-man fast break sealed a win for the Rockets ... whether Nene held a Nugget or not.

2. Serge Ibaka’s no-look, game-tying bank shot

You’ll never see a weirder clutch shot than Ibaka putting it off the glass without looking, to send it to overtime.

3. Giannis Antetokounmpo’s buzzer-beater at Madison Square Garden

The only thing better than The Greek Freak’s shot is Carmelo Anthony’s reaction to it.

4. Kawhi Leonard’s seven-second MVP case

Kawhi buried a clutch jumper and then smothered James Harden on the other end to seal a win for the Spurs. This had people speaking in tongues and denouncing the entirety of Houston.

5. Kyrie Irving’s game-winner on Christmas Day

After hitting the dagger that gave Cleveland its first championship in decades last June, Kyrie followed it up with a turnaround fadeaway over Klay Thompson to beat the Warriors on Christmas. Golden State has nightmares about Uncle Drew.

6. Dion Waiters beats the Warriors

The best dagger of the year, and not just because of the shot. It’s the triumphant pose that really sells it. Business is booming on Waiters Island.

GOOSEBUMPS

We experienced some special emotional moments together this season.

7. The Paul Pierce tribute in Boston

The Truth is playing his 18th and final season in the NBA. There hasn’t been too much pomp ... except in Boston, where Pierce received an appropriate hero’s send-off.

8. The Roots' Basketball History Musical and All-Star intros

This was a damn cool moment that was uniquely NBA in every way.

9. Joel Embiid celebrates T.J. McConnell's buzzer-beater

#NBAVote Joel Embiid http://pic.twitter.com/bNzIpcAub7

— Christian Crosby (@ChristianCrosby) January 12, 2017

There hasn’t been a whole lot for the 76ers to celebrate in the past few years. So to see Embiid’s ecstasy after McConnell beat the Knicks was refreshing and heart-warming. And it gave us one of the greatest photos ever.

10. Coaches speak out

There isn’t really a good category for this one, but it was rather surreal and, for the majority of NBA fans, refreshing. It helped define the league, given the silence of management in other major American sports. Here’s Paul Flannery’s Shootaround on coaches speaking up in the wake of Nov. 8.

11. DeMarcus Cousins and Joel Embiid become BFFs

In a season rife with beef, two talented big men found friendship and mutual respect. There is hope for America.

12. Russell Westbrook and Kevin Durant share one more alley-oop

One of the dominating storylines at the All-Star Game was the opportunity for Durant and Westbrook to reunite on the West team. Would Steve Kerr play them together? (Yes, of course.) Would they acknowledge each other? Would Westbrook feed Durant for a transition alley-oop? He did, and the world reacted like the Berlin Wall fell. The reaction from the other West All-Stars was worth the price of admission.

13. Drake + Doris

The Raptors annual Drake Night turned into an evening of Canada’s favorite son wooing ESPN’s star broadcaster Doris Burke. It culminated in Drake asking DoBu to dinner on live television and Burke later accepting on Twitter. Basketball and romance — all in a night’s work for the Toronto Raptors.

14. Tim Duncan’s jersey retirement ceremony

Everything good about the Spurs is on display here.

15. TNT’s emotional Craig Sager tribute

The world lost a bit of color in December when Craig Sager died after a years-long fight with leukemia. TNT paid tribute to the beloved sideline reporter with a five-minute eulogy narrated by Ernie Johnson.

16. The Sager charity shootout

Two months later, on All-Star Saturday, the NBA put together a special moment starring DJ Khaled, Steph Curry, Candace Parker, Reggie Miller, and others. The purpose: raise $500,000 for the Sager Strong Foundation. Curry couldn’t hit a halfcourt shot in street clothes, so to punctuate the moment, Shaq lifted up Sager’s youngest son for an assisted finger roll.

WTF

The NBA stays weird. Note that the LMAO category has plenty of items that could double in this category.

17. The Warriors’ bizzaro groundbreaking ceremony

Golden State officially began work on its new arena in San Francisco in January. The Warriors don’t do anything boring these days. So of course, the ceremony featured dancing construction workers and excavator ballet. YES, EXCAVATOR BALLET.

THE CRANES ARE DOING A SYNCHRONIZED DANCE WHAT IN THE HELL IS GOING ON http://pic.twitter.com/VfbbcsFGx5

— Courtney Cronin (@CourtneyRCronin) January 17, 2017

18. Lance Stephenson returns to Indiana

The Pacers had a blasé season ... until Lance Stephenson blew into town in March. In his first game back in Indianapolis, he led a stirring comeback, insulted the Raptors with a garbage time layup, acted like he had no clue why they were so mad, and earned Paul George’s highest praise. It was better than MJ in the 4-5.

19. The great NBA potato mystery

In March, various NBA players began receiving personalized potatoes in the mail. Of course, it was viral marketing. For two days there, you had internet writers going full Rust Cohle.

20. The NBA’s Flat Earth Society

Just before All-Star Weekend, Richard Jefferson and Channing Frye revealed on their podcast (which was a revelation in itself) that Kyrie Irving believes the Earth is flat. Most of All-Star Weekend, thus, was filled with serious questions about Kyrie’s beliefs — Adam Silver even had to respond to it during a press conference! — and jokes at Irving’s expense. Shaq later pranked everyone by claiming he too believes the world is flat.

BEEF

If there was one constant this season, it was BEEF. Everyone’s so mad at each other all of a sudden.

Mark D. Smith-USA TODAY Sports

21. Russell Westbrook vs. Zaza Pachulia 22. Kevin Durant vs. Andre Roberson 23. Steph Curry vs. Russell Westbrook and Semaj Christon

Let’s get the NBA’s biggest running beef out of the way with these three critical moments. When the Thunder visited Golden State in January, Zaza put Westbrook on his tail and the OKC star vowed retribution. In Durant’s highly anticipated return to Oklahoma City, ex-teammate Roberson got into his face and butted heads with him. Durant missed the second game in OKC due to injury, so Semaj Christon and eventually Westbrook mixed it up with Curry. I’m starting to think there’s some bad blood here.

24. Serge Ibaka vs. Robin Lopez

Ibaka and Lopez almost traded punches in a late-season battle between the Raptors and their arch-rival Bulls. Luckily, both whiffed and so each were only suspended a game. This could have been much more notorious.

25. Jusuf Nurkic vs. the Nuggets

Denver traded the Bosnian Beast to Portland — its closest rival for the No. 8 seed in the West — and Nurkic immediately became an All-Star-caliber player. He groaned at his diminished role with the Nuggets, so when the Blazers freed him, he made sure to remind Denver what it was missing. At the conclusion of his epic revenge game against the Nuggets in March, he wished his old team a “happy summer.” Savage.

26. Charles Oakley vs. the Knicks

Knicks owner James Dolan had Knicks legend Oakley booted from a game, arrested, and banned from Madison Square Garden over some personal drama between the two. The entirety of Western civilization took Oak’s side; eventually, the league tapped Michael Freaking Jordan to broker a cease fire.

27. C.J. McCollum vs. Chandler Parsons

We hit the lottery by not signing you https://t.co/eSiBaNT061

— CJ McCollum (@CJMcCollum) January 28, 2017

These dudes had such a petty social media fight that the league had to send a memo to teams telling everyone to chill their Twitter fingers.

28. JaVale McGee vs. Shaq

There’s actually nothing funny about this one. The Warriors and both dudes’ moms got involved. This was definitely a season in which beef went a little too far.

29. LeBron vs. Charles Barkley

LeBron had enough of Chuck’s chatter and produced the research to bear. He brought up Barkley spitting on a kid and throwing a dude through a window! So of course, Chuck announced that the feud was over. YEAH it is, buddy. It’s over.

30. LeBron vs. LaVar Ball

Oh, God. LaVar Ball. LaVar talked about how Lil’ Bronny won’t ever measure up to his dad because NBA stars can’t raise talent like LaVar did. Big Bron snapped back. This is the closest he’s ever been to old-man status and it’s just great.

31. DeMarcus Cousins vs. Meyers Leonard

Now this is a great beef. Inexplicable, even to the parties involved.

32. Funeral Game

Speaking of inexplicable, Wizards vs. Celtics came out of nowhere to become the fiercest team rivalry in the league. John Wall did not appreciate getting booped by Jae Crowder, and next thing you know, the Wizards are wearing all black to a game in January to signify the Celtics’ “funeral.” Needlessly intense, like all good NBA beefs should be.

DRAMA

A close cousin of BEEF is Drama, from the courtroom to the locker room.

33. Palace intrigue in Lakerland

Jeanie Buss hired Magic Johnson, fired her brother ... and then her brother tried in hilariously inept fashion to replace her as the controlling owner of the Lakers. She sued, her brother disappeared, and all is now well in Lakerland. What a weird family.

34. The night Boogie got traded

DeMarcus Cousins had a strange All-Star Sunday, playing only two minutes as trade rumors swirled. Immediately after the game, as he faced the media scrum, a Kings PR staffer apparently whispered in his ear that it looked like he was going to be traded. The news broke less than an hour later.

35. Kevin Durant’s return to OKC

We covered the beef involved above, but the scene in Oklahoma City was something else. The cupcake shirts and signs, the chants, the boos.

36. The Bulls’ Instagram saga

Dwyane Wade and Jimmy Butler decided to trash their teammates in the media ... so Rajon Rondo (whose current role in the NBA is apparently to cause havoc wherever he goes) lit them up on Instagram.

DUNKS

Be honest, this is what you came for. Enjoy.

37. Willie Cauley-Stein on the Celtics

38. Terrence Ross 360

Holy cow! Terrence Ross throws down a 360 degree jam http://pic.twitter.com/HbeUfuJoJS

— CSN Northwest (@CSNNW) December 27, 2016

39. Sam Dekker on Enes Kanter

You have to click through for that one because Vine died for our sins. But YO.

40. Andrew Wiggins on JaVale McGee

A better look at Andrew Wiggins' monster dunk! http://pic.twitter.com/OHGPXFDyBV

— NBA (@NBA) November 27, 2016

41. Zach LaVine on Alex Len

Another Vine, so click through. But trust me: Do it.

42. Russell Westbrook dagger dunk on Clint Capela

43. Larry Nance Jr. on Brook Lopez

44. Larry Nance Jr. on David West

Here is the Dunk of the Year by the Dunker of the Year. To my knowledge, Nance has still not apologized to West for his incredible disrespect. This is unacceptable.

LMAO

Here at SB Nation, we like to laugh. (You’ll notice that this is the biggest category.) The NBA came through for us this year.

45. The Lakers thought LeBron was praising D’Angelo Russell (he wasn’t)

When social media goes wrong.

46. SI’s Sam Hinkie 2.0 story

This brilliant Chris Ballard profile fueled two weeks’ worth of Twitter takes. I treasure this story like the beautiful young child it is.

47. Steph Curry and Draymond Green wearing cupcake shirts

After the Warriors bludgeoned the Thunder in Kevin Durant’s aforementioned return to OKC, Curry and Green acquired cupcake T-shirts ... and wore them in the postgame.

48. Michael Jordan trashes the Warriors to their owner’s face

During a meal while NBA owners negotiated a new collective bargaining agreement, the Hornets’ boss, who once won 72 as a player, trashed the Warriors’ empty 73-win record to Golden State owner Joe Lacob’s face because his team didn’t win the ring. MJ never loses.

49. JaVale McGee made Draymond Green-Face blankets

No one has more fun than the Warriors. Speaking of which ...

50. Steph Curry loses Marcin Gortat

Curry won’t be the MVP again, but he has some magical moments.

51. Steph Curry lays down to avoid a poster, fails

One of the funnier subplots at All-Star was Giannis Antetokounmpo playing way harder than anyone else. So when Curry was back to defend a Giannis break, he decided to avoid posterization by literally lying down. Giannis got him on a putback, like, a minute later anyways. Sheesh.

52. Steph Curry slides on the floor after a chest bump

This is my nominee for NBA Meme Material of the Year.

53. Kyle Lowry and DeMar DeRozan on the Jumbrotron

There’s no friendship in the NBA more special than the one between Lowry and DeRozan. This moment captures that perfectly.

54. Epic Warriors jokes hit Jeopardy!

NBA Twitter denizen Loren Chen made it to Jeopardy! and delivered some high-profile meme jokes at the Warriors’ expense.

55. The Cavaliers’ Halloween party

As if the Warriors-Cavs rivalry needed more heat, LeBron had jokes for Golden State at his Halloween party. They have gravestone cookies for Steph Curry and Klay Thompson!

56. Dion Waiters forgets a quote he wanted to share

To be fair, Dion Waiters is too busy HITTING DAGGERS to remember stuff.

57. Shaq tackles his co-workers

When Randy Moss visits Inside the NBA, Shaq takes the opportunity to do what he wants to do every week: tackle Charles Barkley and Kenny Smith.

58. The Spurs retire Matt Bonner’s flannel shirt

Respect.

59. Festus Ezeli’s locker room speech gets shut down

Maybe the funniest scoop of the season from ESPN’s Chris Haynes:

After suffering a [...] loss to Milwaukee, Ezeli, in street clothes, addressed the team in the locker room with a stern speech centered on playing with urgency, sources told ESPN. Then two games later, after a crushing defeat in Memphis, Ezeli once again started giving a team speech, but he was cut short.

McCollum interrupted Ezeli in midsentence and told him that was enough, sources told ESPN. [...] Players were desperately pouring out every ounce of effort trying to change the trajectory of the season, and being lectured by someone who wasn't even playing wasn't received favorably.

60. MUSECAGE

What the hell are we doing here ESPN http://pic.twitter.com/10SHUqOrIv

— CJ Fogler (@cjzero) March 26, 2017

Kobe Bryant is getting even weirder in retirement. This is a snip (via @cjzero) from his education puppet show/horror film, which debuted in the middle of the day on ESPN and is intended for children.

61. "Keep Calm Like Kristaps Porzingis"

Latvian music video of the year every year for the rest of Porzingis’ career.

62. LeBron dancing like nobody is watching

... because he thinks that nobody is watching.

63. Mo Speights ethers the Clippers (he's a Clipper)

After a horrific loss to the Warriors, Speights, then brand new to L.A., implored the Clippers to stop being the Clippers.

64. Sweater Mom vs. Gold Suit Man

CHRISTMAS SWEATER MOM VS GOLD SUIT MAN DANCE OFF http://pic.twitter.com/F4WJZibHFh

— the geek freak (@rachaelhoops) November 27, 2016

65. The bonkers Nets vs. Clippers double overtime game

Nothing about this game made sense. Nothing.

66. J.R. Smith mid-possession dap

J.R. Smith stopped playing defense so he could say hello to his friend Jason Terry on the bench. The other team scored.

67. Klay Thompson living the best life

No one enjoys his awesome NBA life more than Klay Thompson, which is odd considering he so often looks grumpy. He enjoyed a mid-interview beer, showed off his paper plane engineering skills during a press conference, and brought his very good dog to work.

68. Obama cracks a J.R. Smith joke

The Cavaliers hustled to visit the White House two days after the election. Once there, No. 44 got in a crack on the Clown Prince of the NBA.

69. Zaza Pachulia’s erotic celebration

Zaza smacks his own butt and dances. Go Warriors.

70. Devin Booker gets ejected but still signs an autograph for a fan

This was overall the chillest ejection ever. Booker gave the ref a thumbs up, said bye to his homies, and signed a card for a fan on his way out.

71. Marc Gasol's billion dollar strut

I want to apologize.... TO ABSOLUTELY NOBODY!#GrindCity http://pic.twitter.com/JN6p8YdV0G

— Marc Gasol (@MarcGasol) November 17, 2016

72. Human Hungry, Hungry Hippos

This apparently existed out there in the world before this year, but the Cavaliers brought it to NBA intermissions and the world was never the same.

73. The Grizzlies’ mascot strips to "Pony"

For your viewing pleasure: @grizz dancing to @Ginuwine's Pony. http://pic.twitter.com/uySCMjagfT

— Memphis Grizzlies (@memgrizz) November 9, 2016

Grizz, the Memphis Grizzlies mascot, stripping to Ginuwine’s “Pony” is squarely in the middle of the Venn diagram that constitutes SB Nation’s wheelhouse. It gets better on every viewing, too.

74. Sam Dekker’s doink

Dekker almost had the Dunk of the Year, but he succeeded in winning Doink of the Year.

75. The Lakers' failed tank job

It’s difficult to understate how hilarious the Lakers’ failed attempt to lose to the 60-win Spurs in the final week of the season was. L.A. played Metta World Peace 17 minutes and still won!

76. Kemba Walker shimmies ... while his shot clanks

Here’s the blooper of the year. Kemba takes the classic Nick-Young-celebrating-a-miss moment and revs it up by giving us a shimmy.

AWE

We all crave moments that take our breath away. Basketball provides.

77. Russell Westbrook's 45-foot nutmeg bounce pass

I mean ... what? What? How? I don’t think I watched a highlight more times than I watched this one in 2016-17.

78. Anthony Davis' record-destroying All-Star fourth quarter

For 55 years, Wilt Chamberlain held the record for most points in the All-Star Game with 42. Davis destroyed it by double digits when he dropped 52 at home in NOLA in February. Those 52 points included 36 off dunks. It was that kind of All-Star Game.

79. Steph Curry’s impossible layup

Curry and the hoop must have a telepathic relationship or something.

80. John Wall between the legs pass on the break

We saw Westbrook go between someone else’s legs on the break. Wall does it to himself. Magical.

81. Steph Curry hits 13 threes in a game

The dude hit 13-of-17 from deep in a game back in November. If there were any questions as to how he’d play with Kevin Durant, he answered them. (We kept asking, nonetheless.)

82. Kyrie Irving fakes John Henson off the court

Best handles in the NBA.

83. The Knicks and Hawks go to four overtimes

This game included multiple clutch Carmelo Anthony shots, Paul Millsap playing 35 straight minutes and a full 60 overall, and a bonkers fourth overtime. The Hawks won, but isn’t it the journey that counts?

84. John Wall Shammgods Al-Farouq Aminu

If anyone can compete with Kyrie on insane handles, it’s Wall.

85. Kristaps Porzingis’ one-handed block

It’s too bad this only registers as a blocked shot in the box score. I feel like the Nets should have lost points when Kristaps did this.

86. Kris Dunn dribbles around Shabazz Napier

This is a dribble equivalent of a poster dunk. So much disrespect. Poor Shabazz is left having no idea what has occurred.

87. The Warriors score 149 in regulation

... and they didn’t even break a sweat! In fact, Steph Curry, Klay Thompson, and Draymond Green all sat the fourth quarter.

88. Serge Ibaka Revenge Game

Serge actually got a perfectly respectful welcome back to Oklahoma City in his first game there after being traded to Orlando. But he was not respectful to the Thunder, scoring a career high and hitting a game-winner.

89. The Cavaliers’ White House mannequin challenge

Cleveland recruited Michelle Obama to participate in the best sports Mannequin Challenge during that meme’s run. What a way to cap eight years of basketball being the official sport of the White House.

90. Isaiah Thomas becomes a Boston legend

Isaiah has been incredible all season, but it was in January where he became the King in the Fourth with a string of clutch performances, including this game-winner against the Hawks.

91. Klay Thompson's 60 in 29 minutes

When you play with Steph Curry and Kevin Durant, you get clean looks more often than usual. That doesn’t mean that scoring five dozen in less than a half-hour of play is anything less than insane. Klay is my top candidate to drop 75 in a game in the next five years.

92. Westbrook's 57-point triple-double against the Magic

This was the individual performance of the year for me, edging the next moment on the list. The Thunder, fighting for favorable playoff position, trailed the Magic in the fourth. Russ took over and sent the game to overtime with a game-tying triple. He ended up registering the highest-scoring triple-double ever.

93. Devin Booker's 70

The young Booker became the sixth player ever to score 70. Sure, he did it in part because the Suns intentionally fouled the Celtics in garbage time to get the ball back for Devin. They still count. Booker is super legit.

94. Giannis Antetokounmpo covers 45 feet in one dribble

How?!

95. The LeBron vs. Paul George duel

As LeBron and the Cavaliers prepared for the playoffs and PG and the Pacers were fighting just to make it, the duo had an epic duel that eventually ended with a Cleveland win but an Indiana moral victory.

96. The Warriors vs. Rockets thriller

Houston’s signature win of the season came in the best game of the season ... and the first one that kept everyone up way too late on a weeknight. We had a James Harden triple-double, a Kevin Durant explosion, and a Draymond Green kick — pretty much everything you could want from Rockets-Warriors minus Patrick Beverley ending someone’s season.

97. Marc Gasol’s no-look outlet

This was the season in which Marc’s latent swag came into full view.

98. James Harden's wild no-look lob

This is one of those plays that looks so pretty in realtime and then completely blows your mind when you slow it down and see what happened. It’s a perfect symbol of the extraordinary season Harden had.

99. An impossible Warriors fast break

Steph Curry just throws it up & KD flushes it home! https://t.co/BFKnzbfVnn

— NBA TV (@NBATV) December 6, 2016

Eighty feet without the ball ever touching the floor, and after it leaves Draymond Green’s hands, it never even touches someone whose feet are touching the floor. Unreal.

100. Kevin Love outlet to LeBron for the tie

This incredible play sent an incredible game between the Cavaliers and the Wizards to overtime. In case you’d forgotten, Love can pass as well as any big man and LeBron is cold as a Popsicle in Nunavut.

101. THE BEST MOMENT OF THE NBA SEASON

And finally, the best, most appropriate moment of the 2016-17 NBA season: Metta World Peace hitting a free throw and declaring to all who care to listen: “I love basketball!”

Metta World Peace just loves basketball https://t.co/1jjdkANloe :: @TheCauldron

— SB Nation NBA (@SBNationNBA) November 2, 2016

Thanks for spending the regular season with us. Stick around for the playoffs, too. It’ll be great.