#like not anything so harsh as “everyone in israel should die” but in a “israelis should stop condemning palestinians as a whole”
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thepandalion · 4 months ago
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Attempted to leave the fandom after being made incredibly uncomfortable about it in late 2023 but also just remembered a specific line from a specific episode and now I'm going feral again
#There really is no escaping the brainrot#Anyways. I genuinely do not want to be in the fandom#I don't want to continue writing and posting and interacting with these people#(fandom in question is mcyt in general. Because some of the CCs also said some stuff on twitter at some point or another and#like not anything so harsh as “everyone in israel should die” but in a “israelis should stop condemning palestinians as a whole”#And I saw that. During the times when we still didn't have anyone back. Like very early into things#And just. Idk the fact that they never said anything about how our lives matter too.#The fact that there's a LOT of antisemitism going in that community. To the point where I left discord servers over feeling unsafe#And they never stop their community from doing and saying that kind of stuff.#But oh they're soo friendly and nice. Except for the fact I don't feel safe in their spaces anymore.#After years I finally felt comfy enough to be with the community and I immediately regretted it#But goddamn because I just remembered that in secret life scar has a line about embracing the chaos#Which just means I really am as good as I think I am. Because I made him a creature of chaos in my au all the way before double life#(technically it was before moon big. Might even be before last life. I also made him blow up the moon. Which is why I remember it being s8)#But goddamn. I don't want to be in that fandom#Logically I know I shouldn't come back to that fandom#But I miss it. I want to finish writing sunbringer. I want to post it all at once and then orphan it so it can't be traced back to me#And I don't think I should#I also can't. Because I'm stuck on a specific chapter POV and I do not know how to write keralis. And I have noone to ask for help#(because again. Where would I ask. I don't feel safe with these people so I can't be on discord servers with them so how do I get past this#Sigh
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