#like none of this came for me where i lived and i was still sobbing through the chapters

[chucktaylorupset]

For as long as I could remember, whenever I was in pain, whether from a cut or a toothache, Mother would make a tincture of lobelia and skullcap. It had never lessened the pain, not one degree. Because of this, I can come to respect pain, even revere it, as necessary and untouchable. Twenty minutes after I swallowed the red pills, the earache was gone. I couldn't comprehend its absence. I spent the afternoon swinging my head from left to right, trying to jog the pain loose again. I thought if I could shout loudly enough, or move quickly enough, perhaps the earache would return and I would know the medicine had been a sham after all. Charles watched in silence, but he must have found my behavior absurd, especially when I began to pull on my ear, which still ached dully, so I could test the limits of this strange witchcraft.

From Educated by Tara Westover

terribly charmed by my sibling sending me a voice message that just said “i just always take ibuprofen at the wrong time. i had a headache all afternoon, from three to eight pm and then i took an ibuprofen half an hour before the headache went away! i could have just saved an ibuprofen!”

[cherrieflavouredheadcanons]

Hi can we please have fluff w Aventurine where reader and him reunite after 2. 1 and just fucking elope start a new life etc? Please I need it.

God yes. This is what we all need after 2.1. I'm aware he is in a coma-like state technically now but for the sake of fluff and this headcanon he is awake from that coma and is now reuniting with you. CW: Spoilers for 2.1 and Aventurines actual name, starts angsty but then turns fluffy, Gn reader, pre established relationship hurt/comfort

I am still accepting requests (especially for aven) btw so if you wanna see something send it in!

Back in your arms

You had lost track of how long it was since Aventurine left for his mission in Penacony. Has it been 2 months? No, probably more. It had been months since you last had been able to make contact with him. Your messages no longer went through, unable to be sent.

Looking at your textlog and scrolling up, you came across the last message he had sent you. It had come in while you were asleep, and it simply read “I love you”.

Waking up to that message would have been a sweet message for most people, but for you it had made you immensely worried.

 Aventurine was never someone who professed his love openly, so such messages were quite rare. Receiving such a message, especially unprompted, made you send him a barricade of texts, none of which went through and even now months later none were able to be sent.

If you were honest you were starting to lose hope of ever seeing him again, who knows what happened in Penacony after all? He could be…dead for all you knew, you had no way to verify whether that was true or not after all. 

You tried continuing your life on as you would normally, what else could you do? It was hard though, everyday you missed him more and more. Sometimes you imagined his face in a crowd somewhere but whenever you would take a closer look he would vanish.

Sighing you closed your phone and looked around your apartment, it felt so liveless ever since Aventurine was gone. Tears were falling down your eyes as you wondered how much longer you had to live with the uncertainty of where he was and if he was even alive.

Exhaustion was taking over as you began falling asleep. A common occurrence nowadays, since at night you were restless, unable to fall asleep as you worried. Just as you were beginning to fully doze off, you heard the door to your apartment open, immediately waking up.

No one but you and Aventurine had the key, and with him being absent panic coursed through you thinking someone was breaking and entering. You grabbed the nearest heavy thing to defend yourself with.

“For fucks sake…” You muttered as you made your way to where the noises were coming from. Cursing every entity out there for piling even more shit onto you as if your significant other being possibly dead wasn’t enough.

Readying your weapon (probably a heavy book) you stepped foot into the room where the noise was coming from ready to attack and hit the intruder. But once you saw who it was that was in your appartment, you dropped your makeshift weapon, a sob escaping your mouth.

Before you stood Aventurine, alive and breathing. You rubbed your eyes, making sure that this wasn’t your mind playing a cruel trick on you again. Aventurine watched you with a smirk on his, albeit very exhausted looking, face and his eyes held a new found softness you had never seen before.

You fell into his arms immediately, holding him tightly against your body, feeling his warmth. Desperately you grabbed at his clothes as you held on to him, scared this was all just a dream and you would wake up all alone once again. Tears were falling from your eyes, unable to hold them back, the relief washing over you making you let out all of your emotions.

“Wow you missed me that much?” He asked, in his usual teasing tone. Though there was something in his voice that usually wasn’t there. Desperation and a bit of fear. Was he afraid you wouldn’t have missed him? Or was there a deeper reason for it?

Moving away from the hug you grabbed his face in your hands, the tears still falling from your eyes as you took a good look at him. His face had fallen in, and he seemed exhausted. But there was also something in his eyes, his beautiful eyes you were so sure you would never see again, that you couldn’t recognize, having never seen it on him before.

Before you spoke your first words to him, you pulled his face closer and gently kissed him. The feeling of his lips on yours felt like you were floating in heaven. They may have been more chapped than usual, but fuck was it nice to feel him again.  Breaking the kiss you finally were able to muster up your first words to him.

“Fuck…I was so worried about you…I…When my messages stopped being able to sent I was…so sure you…Please…never worry me like that again Aventurine…”

You leaned your forehead against his, your words jumbled together from the adrenaline coursing through you.

He took in a deep breath, and held it for a moment before letting it out. A gesture you saw in many people before they needed to say something important and heavy, but one you never saw in your lover.

“...Kakavasha…” His voice seemed unsure and meek as he spoke. 

You, of course, had no idea what he was saying, so you looked into his eyes confused.

“Wha-”

“Kakavasha…it is…my given name. The one my mother gave me” He inhaled deeply before he continued.

“It is a long story but the short version is…I am no longer affiliated with the IPC, they probably think I died or something. So I no longer go by Aventurine, and…with how close we are and how much you mean to me. I felt like it was appropriate for you to know my true name...”

His eyes refused to look at you, flickering about unsurely as he spoke. Though he tried to sound confident, his voice wavered, scared that you would not accept him for who he truly was and reject his true self.

You looked at him gently and with all the love you had for him, gently pulling him close again and kissing his nose.

“Well then…It is nice to meet you Kakavasha…” You smiled brightly at him, showing him you accepted him as he was.

He felt relief course through his body and could not help himself but pull you into a passionate kiss. He kissed you like you were the oxygen he needed to stay alive. As if he would die without you.

Breaking the kiss he whispered “Marry me.” It wasn’t a question but a request. One that you were too stunned to answer to, looking at him with wide eyes.

“I mean it. Let’s get married, run away from everything and start a new life just you and me.”

His eyes were pleading with you to agree. He knew that he wanted to start over, but he knew he needed you with him.

“...yes!!” You once again fell into his arms and kissed him. The two of you holding each other so closely it was as if you were one.

Kakavasha knew that he would need to tell you everything that happened in Penacony at one point, even the part where he tried to end his life. But he knew that if he explained everything to you, you would still stay by his side and be with him. 

You were his family after all.

[uluvjay]

Hi can I get (for one muse to drive and finger the other who is in the passenger seat.) with either Sebastian Vettel or Jenson button please 🙏

Dbf!Sebastian Vettel x fem! Reader ft. Jenson Button

Yk i couldn’t decide who i wanted to write this with so i chose both, i hope you don’t mind:)

Warnings?; SMUT, fingering, reader is the daughter of a retired driver! But no names are specified, age gap!(reader is in her twenties), cursing, kissing, dirty talk, teasing, kinda public? Everything happens in a car.

You weren’t expecting to see Jenson in the passenger seat of Sebastian’s two seater Ferrari when it pulled up to the curb of the restaurant.

You had been on a date gone wrong when you called your father’s best friend for a ride, none of your friends had answered and with your parents being out of town he was the last person you could think of.

“Um, seb where am I supposed to sit?” You questioned and your confusion only grew when Jenson opened the passenger door but never got out.

You were met with a smirk from the German as he kept quiet, but Jenson gave you the answer you were looking for as he patted his lap and spoke up.

“Got a perfect seat right here love” the Brit smiled at you.

Butterflies filled your stomach as you thought about it, it wouldn’t be the first time you sat on his lap however last time you were in Sebastian’s living room while the man was between your thighs and Jenson held you open for him.

“Come on honey, we haven’t got all night” Sebastian’s spoke, bringing you out of your thoughts.

You blushed as you took your spot on top of Jenson, your little dress doing nothing to put a barrier between you and his denim covered thighs.

You were tense and Jenson didn’t like it, he could feel you holding back your weight and not relaxing completely into him.

“Calm down love, it’s just us” Jenson whispered into your ear as one of his large hands began to run along your bare thigh.

A smile took over the Blondes face as he felt your body sink into his, releasing a sigh of contentment as he felt your warm body against his.

“So what happened on your date?” Sebastian questioned, one of his hands coming to rest on the thigh closest to him; Jenson’s still on the other.

“Uh, nothing he just wasn’t my type” you breathed shakily as you watched Jenson’s hand slowly move under the skirt of your dress.

“Hm, why’d you go out with him then?”

“W-what do you mean?” You stuttered as Sebastian’s hand joined his friends.

“You said he wasn’t your type, if you knew that why’d you go in the first place darling?” Jenson questioned in your ear, voice deep and accent thick.

“Bec-oh, because he was, shi-He was cute” you whined as Jenson’s hand began to rub you through the lace of your panties.

“Yeah? Why’d you end it early?” Sebastian quipped as his own hand came into contact with your folds, thanks to Jenson removing your panties.

You couldn’t reply, the feeling of his thick fingers teasing your entrance taking all of your concentration.

But Jenson wasn’t having it, “I think he asked you a question bunny” he spoke with a sharp swat to your thigh.

Swallowing thickly you did your best to reply to the Man beside you.

“H-he recognized my last n-name, ah!” you whimpered, hand gripping onto Sebastian’s wrist as two of his fingers entered your core.

“Let me guess he turned out to be an f1 fan and only asked about your dad?.” Jenson spoke.

“Mhm” you sobbed as both their fingers began to work you open, Sebastian’s scissoring inside you while Jenson shamelessly rubbed your clit.

You attempted to buck your hips but they were quickly pushed down by Jenson’s free hand, yearning him a whimper of annoyance.

“Don’t be a brat now Liebling, after all we did cut our dinner short to come and get you” Sebastian tutted, taking his eyes off the hardly filled road for a moment to look over at your breathtaking frame.

The skirt of your dress was pushed up and the panties you once wore were now resting on the floor of his overly expensive car, your pretty sounds getting louder as their fingers didn’t let up.

“Can feel her clenching my fingers so tight, our girls getting close” Sebastian spoke aloud, talking about you like you weren’t even there.

“Please, I-need it, please I’ll be good” you begged them, the pleasure from both of them so overwhelming.

“Oh you poor thing” Jenson said with a faux pout, his free hand coming up to hold you jaw, turning you head to connect your lips in a dirty kiss.

It was filthy, teeth clashing and tongues fighting against each other, and by the time you had pulled away you realized Sebastian was pulling into his private driveway.

And while you had expected them to let up they didn’t, in fact Sebastian sped up his movements as he felt you clenching hard around his fingers.

The sound of squelching from your cunt filled the small car. Sebastian’s fingers coming into contact with the sensitive spot inside you as his fingers continued to fuck you rigorously.

“Seb!-ngh, feels so good” you babbled, head thrown back against Jason’s shoulder as his fingers that had been abusing your clit applied more pressure to the small bud.

“Look so beautiful like this bunny, all spread open for us.” Sebastian cooed.

“Don’t stop please! I need it” you begged both men, your pathetic pleads going right into Jensons ear.

“Oh you need it huh? I’m not sure honey. Already had to leave our dinner because you got bored with some jerk, why should we give you anything else?” Jenson tutted behind you.

“No, no, please-Jenson please let me come, I’m sorry for interrupting your dinner” You sobbed as the heat in your lower stomach got stronger and stronger.

“Hmm, I guess we’ll accept your apology. Go on and come for us pretty girl.” Sebastian encouraged.

Their fingers worked together to get you over the edge, mouth dropping open in a silent scream as your body shook.

Your thighs quivered as you soaked Sebastian’s fingers in your release, both men’s eyes gleaming with pride as they watched you come down from your high.

Jenson had slightly repositioned you so you could now face Sebastian, just in time to watch him slip his covered fingers into his mouth; moaning at the taste of you.

A gasp came from you as Jenson ran his fingers through your folds so he could get his own taste of your release.

“Taste so good darling” he smiled down at you.

“Wanna taste?” Sebastian asked.

With a small nod you leaned forward expecting him to slip his fingers into your mouth, however one of his large hands wrapped around your throat and pulled your lips to his.

You moaned into his mouth at the taste of yourself, his tongue running along yours as your lips moved together.

“I think it’s time we take you inside and fuck you properly, what’d you think?”

-

[just-an-anon-reader]

The Forgotten Sister

Chapter I

Pairing: Ekko x Fem!Reader

Tags: Minimal use of Y/N, no specific description of the reader, friends to lovers, CW swearing, CW blood, CW injury, CW violence, CW guns, TW death

A/N: I might have gotten carried away with how long this got…

Chapter II

"I missed you too..."

Feeling your sobs begin to calm and your eyes begin to puff from all the tears that cascaded down your cheeks, you gingerly take a small step back without entirely leaving your sister's embrace. Just enough to finally get a proper look at the face that changed with time. Vi was undoubtedly no longer the girl you remember looking up to as a child. The soft roundness of her cheeks that came with childhood was now replaced by sharp, hard lines with scars in places that weren't there before. And yet, despite the changes brought about by years apart, Vi looked... young. Like she hadn't lived with the chaos that covered Zaun like a blanket. Like she hadn't seen the death and destruction that followed as Silco flooded the Lanes with his damn shimmer.

"Where have you been all these years?" you ask, voice still trembling with emotion as your thumb traces over the tattoo on her cheekbone.

"I was... I was in Stillwater... But that doesn't matter! All that matters is that I'm here now." Vi says, head tilting lovingly into your touch.

"You were in Stillwater? All this time? Why?! H-how did you get out?"

"... someone... got me out,"

"It's the enforcer, isn't it?" Ekko says suddenly.

Having stood quietly from the side and letting you two sisters have your moment, a reunion long since overdue. Having watched with a soft chuckle as you bawled your eyes out and wet snot dripped down your chin. But now he stood with his stance firm and stiff. Arms crossed against his chest as the steel mask of a leader clicked into place on his handsome face.

"...an enforcer?" You gasp, involuntarily stepping away from your sister's embrace.

Your body physically recoiled from Vi, like her touch shimmered itself. Vi whispers your name, hurt flashing across her face at your visceral reaction.

But she didn't understand. She didn't know. The blood that painted your hands red and the disgusting sticky feeling that came with it from all the people who bled at your doorstep. People whose lives you so desperately tried to save as they lay dying. Beaten half to death by fucking enforcers. Some of them were sanctioned by Piltover, while others were greedy fuckers with pockets heavy with Silco's coin. And they said fissure folk were the shitty ones.

She doesn't know...

You tried to reason with yourself. But feelings of disgust and betrayal filled you faster than you could stop them. You take another step back, moving in line with Ekko. Gone was the love, replaced by suspicion and mistrust. The man beside you bumps his shoulder against yours, pulling your attention. You look at each other in silent conversation. He tilts his head in a gesture to somewhere, yet nowhere in particular. The movement you follow with a flick of your eyes, immediately knowing the message behind it. An understanding passed between you two confirmed with a nod.

"There's something we gotta show you," Ekko says to Vi before moving to lead the way.

You hobble after him silently, your cane thumping against the wooden floor, ignoring the confusion splayed on Vi's face. Seeing that none of you two were planning to explain anything further, she rushes to follow after. Opting to lag a bit ways behind. Taking in the view around her. A view so different than what you'd usually expect from Zaun. The sun bathed the base with a beautiful, bright glow. Its warmth touching the skin of her cheek as it peaked through the leaves. Children laughed and played, chasing after one another beneath the shade of firelight leaves. People walked and talked about, free from worry and strife. It was beautiful. Amazing what the group has accomplished in seven years. A small hidden reprieve from the chaos of the Lanes.

At the last set of stairs down the tree, steeper and more uneven than the rest, Ekko offers his elbow to you like clockwork. Carefully, you clamber down the steep stairs. Hand gripping tightly onto Ekko's forearm as your weak knee wobbled with every step. Vi rushes to hold onto you, hand about to reach for your other arm, when Ekko stops her with a chuckle.

"She'll smack you if you do that. And besides," he says, eyes looking towards you. Lovingly... longingly. A gaze much unbeknownst to you as you grunted at the feel of uncomfortable pressure straining against your knee at each step.

"She's doing great,"

"Damn right. My knee won't get stronger being babied," you hiss, taking another shaky step down onto the floor.

Finally...

You breathe a sigh of relief at the feeling of solid ground beneath your feet that doesn't quake or buckle at the slightest tremble of your knee.

Ekko really needs to fix these last few steps...

They wobbled too much for your liking. And they creaked in weird places that always made you antsy. Yep, he definitely needs to fix these. The man in question has stopped beside you, arm still outstretched, waiting as you find your bearings.

"You alright?" He whispers.

"Yeah, thank you for being such an excellent handrail." You whisper teasingly, giving his arm a playful pinch before letting go.

Ekko chuckles, shaking his head as he trudges forward a few paces before stopping. You follow, hobbling to a stop beside him. Eyes forward, looking at the slab of wall that makes up a part of the tree. A mural. A place of homage. A reminder of what you've all had to sacrifice.

"This is everyone that we've lost..." Ekko says, his voice somber as he looks at the colorful, familiar faces on the wall. Faces of loved ones, faces of lost ones... lost... but never forgotten.

"The price of our freedom..." you sigh.

"Some of it was enforcers... most was Silco."

Ekko wraps a pinky around yours. For comfort, you reckoned. But you weren't sure if he meant for you or for himself.

"Your sister works for him not because she has to but because she wants to."

Vi looks away. Expression torn, hurt. And your heart ached for her.

"I see you've found Jinx,"

"Her name is Powder... You're her sister! How can you call her that?"

"She hasn't been Powder in a long time, Vi,"

"So? Are you gonna ask me to leave her?! Is that what you did?!”

In a rush of fury, she lunges at you, hands grabbing onto the lapels of your coat, pulling you roughly towards her. Knuckles holding tight as you watched them turn white. Vi locked eyes with yours. A fire blazing hot behind those baby blues. But they did not burn you. Tone, cold as ice, you spit your next words, sharp like a knife. Meant to cut, meant to bleed.

"I... wasn't the one who left."

Vi breathes a heavy sigh like a fire doused with a bucket of cold water. Gently releasing you before stepping away, hiding her face behind the length of her hair. Ekko steps behind you as you stumble, steadying you. Eyes roaming over yours in worry, only calming once you gave him a nod.

You were alright...

"Look, Vi, I don't blame you for being gone. But you were gone for so long... things have changed. We, have changed,"

You step towards her, hand on her shoulder, gently squeezing it.

"Besides, we still have that... enforcer... friend of yours."

"Seems like I just keep making you mad today,"

"I remember it being... a unique talent of yours,"

Vi breathes an airy chuckle, turning to face you. Looking at you, like seeing you for the first time. You used to be so small, so frail. Someone she needed to protect. Like Powder... But now, look at you... You still limped, yes, but you stood tall. Eyes sharp, hands strong and steady. And you didn't take shit from anyone. You really grew up without her.

Turning towards Ekko, Vi says, "Her name is Caitlyn. She's after Silco. It's why she got me out in the first place. You can trust her. I promise."

You and Ekko give each other a look. Another silent conversation ensues. He nods, and you nod back.

"Alright, come on," he says before moving forward. You trailing behind him.

You both lead Vi through a tunnel-like vent in the wall, an exhaust pipe opening large enough for people to pass through. There, you find two boys, Mach and Tun, playing around. Pulling at their cheeks, making funny faces, and challenging the other to hold their laugh the longest. The same two boys who were supposed to be watching over the makeshift prison cell.

"Hey! How's our guest?" Ekko says, greeting the boys who squealed in excitement at the sight of him.

They scream his name happily as they run around him in excited circles before jumping towards you, pulling at the hem of your shirt, almost making you stumble.

"She's loud,"

"She shouts a lot,"

The two boys giggle in unison.

"Alright, you two, let's get her outta there," Ekko says, chuckling as the boys give a resounding "Yessir!".

Pulling down their masks, they race for the keys hanging on a hook beside the door. Pushing and shoving each other for it before Tun finally gets a hold of them with a triumphant "Yes!". Slotting the key into the lock, the gears turn and unlock with a click as the door swings open with a loud squeak. Inside, handcuffed to a statue in the center of the room, was a girl with a sack still tied around her head. Her identity may be hidden, but her role is betrayed by the golden edges of her uniform. Hidden by whatever she wore on top, it glinted where the light would hit. Shining despite the darkness of the room.

She grunted as she fought against her restraints, wiggling about and head snapping to the sound of something swinging open somewhere she couldn't see. To Tun's annoyance, Mach successfully grabs the keys from his hands and runs into the room, undoing the cuffs before pulling the sack off her head. Eyes blinking at the sudden glare, her hazy vision lands on the hand in front of her. A hand fully intending to help her up. The moment her eyes cleared, she slaps the offending appendage away. Mach gasps at the impact, moving away towards you and Ekko by the door. The woman's eyes follow the movement. Her sharp eyebrows pinched as her deep blue eyes narrowed, she glared at the two of you with all the anger she could muster.

"What have you done with Vi?"

... this is Caitlyn?

Also, thank you to those who thought chapter 1 was worth reading!!

@silas-222

@scarletrosesposts

[enwoso]

LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL — alexia putellas x teen!reader

twelve days of christmas | day 8

based on this request

the streets of barcelona were alive with christmas fun and cheer as fairy lights hung across building fronts, festive music spilled from cafes and children chased each other with big toothy grins.

but for you, none of it mattered. at 18 on paper you were living the dream. signing for barca in the summer should have been the best thing that had ever happened as your career into football continued to grow.

but instead it felt like everything, slowly was falling apart.

you sat alone in your small apartment which just happened to be in the same building as a lot of your other teammates, such as keira, ona, alexia.

your eye-line catching the unpacked boxes in the corner of your room. moving from england had been hard enough leaving everything you knew behind but the pressure of playing for one of the best teams in the world had you at point where you were starting to crumble.

every game felt like another failure. every missed chance or misplaced pass was catapulted by the media who had turned on your pretty quickly. having you at cloud nine as the 'best rising star' to a 'disappointing, overrated player'

you had told anyone but you mind was starting to eat away at you, your depression which you had fought so hard to overcome was slowly coming back and beginning to suffocate you.

you were beginning to avoid your teammates, declining their invitations to team nights out as well as rarely speaking with coaching staff when she desperately needed to.

so now, with christmas peeking around the corner the festive cheer only fuelled your loneliness.

training today had been no different, you'd kept your head down doing the drills like a robot as you barely acknowledged anyone to the point where you hadn't noticed the watchful eye alexia had over you. watching each move you made a worried look in her eyes.

as you were packing your bag up slipping it over your shoulder as you were about to make the short journey back to your apartment, you felt a hand on your shoulder.

"y/n" alexia called softly, "can we talk?"

you hesitated as you tried to carry on walking brushing the spaniard off but she was quick to hold you back, grabbing your wrist. "alexia, i'm fine. really" you said but it came out more as a beg for her to just let you go.

alexia stepped closer, her expression kind but firm as her brow furrowed the same worried look in her eyes from training had returned. "you've been quiet lately, i just want to make sure your okay. you not alone astro, we are here for you"

you froze, your brave front you'd been putting on threatening to crack at her soft words. you wanted to brush alexia off, carry on dealing with it as you were, tell her you were fine but the lump in your throat grew too large.

"i don't know if i can do this," you whispered, you voice trembling, "everyone hates me and i can't.. i can't be what they want me to be" you sobbed as alexia wrapped you into a tight, comforting hug.

alexia's eyes softened, pulling away from the hug as she placed a hand on your shoulder, "come with me" she whispered still loud enough for you hear as she gentle tugged on your arm for you to follow her.

reluctantly, you found yourself in alexia's car being driven through the streets of barcelona. stopping at a house which you didn't recognise, but it was nicely decorated with fairy lights and many christmas decorations.

"where are we?" you asked, you voice still raspy from crying earlier on.

"you'll see" alexia replied with a small smile as she lifted her hand to knock on the door, knocking a few times before the door opened.

"¡ah, alexia! hola y/n, hace tiempo que no te veo. entras, entra" alexia's mother greeted you both with a warm hug as you entered what you now realised was alexia's family home.

her younger sister alba hugging you as she came to see who was at the door teasing you about being too serious as the scent of freshly baked goods filled the air.

alexia leading you into the living room where a perfectly decorated christmas tree stood tall and proud as laughter echoed as alexia's cousins played games on the floor.

you stood slightly awkward, unsure of your place, "i don't belong here" you whispered quietly but alexia still caught what you said.

alexia turned to you, a frown appearing. "of course you do astro, you're part of this team and that makes you part of this family"

hearing alexia's kind words leave her mouth, a sense of comfort in them you had been searching for since you arrived in barcelona. you felt a weight on your chest lightly even if it was only slightly.

that evening you spent the time with alexia and her family, spending the time playing board games and sharing stories as everyone took a break alexia bumped your shoulder.

"you know, i know what's it like to struggle" alexia spoke softly and with such caution, "i felt the same pressure when i was young, like i wasn't enough. but astro you have to remind yourself why you started playing in the first place"

"you love the game, right?" alexia asked as you nodded, tears pooling in your eyes. "then it's okay to feel like this but you can't shut everyone out. we are here for you, the whole team is" you nodded as the floodgates opened. alexia wrapping you in a tight hug letting you cry.

-

over the next few weeks, things started to look up and you were finding you spark slowly. alexia's family had welcomed you and supported you with open arms. you'd

the club had organised for you to be able to go home for christmas meaning alexia was bringing your christmas gift early. alexia had spent the day helping you pack for your trip back to england, as you flew early tomorrow morning.

“astro, i have this for you-“ alexia smiled as she handed you a small gift box which was perfectly wrapped with a small silk bow on the top. you looked to alexia thanking her for it as you tore the neat wrapping off it.

inside was a simple silver beaded bracelet with the words, ‘hay luz al final del túnel’ engraved in to a small heart charm and which in english translated to — there's light at the end of the tunnel.

you looked up from the small bracelet, your throat feeling tight as you engulfed alexia in a hug, as you whispered your thanks to her — not just for the bracelet but for all the help she’s given you in the past few weeks.

alexia smiled, “your going to be okay, y/n. one step at a time”

[leaderwon]

come back i still need you

paring : nonidol!jungwon x reader

warnings : character death, ANGST left and right, mentions of being depressed

word count : 1.5k

luna's diary : kinda shed a tear writing this

IT HAD BEEN, 3 weeks and 6 days, since you left him.

He was stuck in the endless loop of the 4th stage of grief. Depression, and was left wondering if he'll ever move forward to the next stage and accept your death.

Oh how cruel the world was. Taking away his lover and the plans for the future you guys had carefully planned.

You guys were walking on the street on the day it happened. Giggles filling the both of your bodies as a silver band of ring with a small diamond shined on your ring finger. He had just proposed to you, with promises of giving you everything he had to offer, of staying by your side until his last breath, to grow up even more and have little yous running around. Maybe you could get a dog and a cat and live in a beautiful home.

And then it happened.

He still remembers the way you shoved him to the side as a car came speeding towards you. Your yells still ringing in his ears from the past 3 weeks.

He remembers slowly walking to you trying to take in what just happened. In the corner of his eye he could see the once silver, shiny ring now covered in blood. Your blood. It was everywhere. He felt sick to his stomach. He cradled your face as he broke into sobs. "No no this can't be happening baby wake up" He called out for you as his sobs turned into a breakdown. He saw the light in your eyes slowly disappear. He saw the love of his life leave him, even though you were right there.

2 days later, it was your funeral. As everyone showed him sympathy and gave him hugs. He was still in denial. The first stage of grief. He couldn't even count the amount of times he heard "let me know if you need anything, Jungwon". He needed you back in his arms, but none of the people could give him that. There's no way you could have just left, right? What about the promises? The home? The dog and the cat? mini yous?

Few days later, he slowly slipped into the second stage of grief. Anger. He was mad at no one but himself. He should have been the one to die, not an angel like you. The car should have hit him. Not you. Or maybe he was mad at you too? why would you sacrifice yourself and leave him alone?

Then came in the third stage of grief. Bargain. He prayed and prayed that this would be a long painful nightmare. No way the world could have been so cruel on him. He was just 20 wanting to see life with you by his side, there's no way his fate was written like this.

After realising that this wasn't a dream, and you really were gone, entered the 4th stage of grief. Depression. He was an empty void as he laid on his bed all day leaving all his friends worried. He only got up to eat, which was very rare by the way. Leaving the texts his friends sent him on delivered, he read the last conversation you had with him. Where he mentioned the date and that he had a surprise for you and your excited text messages as a small smile crept on his lips. How he wished he never took you out.

Come back. He still needs you.

It was a new day as the sun shone through Jungwon's curtains. Today, was your one month anniversary, of you getting engaged and also since you left. Today was the worst of all days. It had been a month? no way. "i wish i could turn back time and change everything" he mumbled.

"Time" he jolted up as he remembered something you said about turning back time. Hope rushed through his eyes as he swiftly got out of his bad and rushed to take a shower and get ready. He could not believe he did not think of this sooner. Getting dressed, he rushed out of his home. Coming back taking the ring you once wore in his hands and heading to his car.

"I'm going to get you back, my love"

20 minutes later he reached your apartment. He did not have the courage to step into your apartment after your death. Opening the door he smelled your familiar scent for the first time in a month. Not wanting to waste time, he got in and rummaged through your belongings. "Where is it, god damn".

Finally spotting the shiny wooden box. He picked it up seeing a necklace with a tiny clock in it. Wearing it, he saw as it started to glow.

"How may I help you today?" a voice spoke out as he looked at a beautiful woman in front of him.

"Who must you be? you're not one of them" The voice continued referring to your blood line. "I'm Yang Jungwon, I lost my lover in a car accident, exactly a month ago from now"

"You wish to bring her back?" The voice questioned him. "Yes I need to please. She mentioned about this pendent to me a while back. You need to help me" He replied begging. "Jungwon, I'd suggest you move on. You'll lose yourself if anything goes downhill, and there are less number of chances of it going good and it going bad." The female figure said showing sympathy. "Please, miss. I don't have anything to lose anymore, she was my everything" He said breaking down into a sob.

Sighing, she touched the pendent on his colar. "What time do you want to go to?" she asked giving in. "Exactly a month ago" He said as the necklace started to glow again. "Goodluck, Jungwon" she said.

He was going to make sure you were alive. But at what cost?

In a blink of an eye, he was back. On the street, with you. "I honestly didn't expect you to do it today" Your voice said. Oh how he missed your voice, to see your face in front of him again and to hold his hand. He suddenly remembered why he was here as he became hyper-aware of his surroundings. He knew the car would be coming your way any second. Before he could think of changing your position, it was too late. The car was already coming towards you at an increasing pace. There was no way he could save the both of you.

So he did what he initially came back for.

He saved you.

Shoving your body to the side, he felt the car hit him as he lost consciousness. The last thing he saw was you standing and looking at him in utter shock. Atleast you were safe and alive.

"Jungwon? baby hey, wake up" you cradled his face and broke down into sobs, the same way he did, in another time line. You left a peck on his forehead as you left him there rushing to your apartment.

I'm not going to lose you Jungwon. Not like this.

You rummaged through your belongings, the same way he did. Wearing the pendent, you wished to go back 20 minutes from your present.

You were back with him, on the same street, holding his hand as you listened to him talk to you. You knew the time was near as you walked faster looking for a turn that could divert you form the path in which it was about to happen. Before you could find something, you heard the car's tire screech behind you. There was no way you could save the both of you.

So you did what you initially came for.

You saved him.

You shoved him to the side as the car came in contact with your body. The last thing you saw, was him. Atleast he was safe and alive.

He slowly walked to you trying to take in what just happened. In the corner of his eye he could see the once silver, shiny ring now covered in blood. Your blood. It was everywhere. He felt sick to his stomach. He cradled your face as he broke into sobs. "No no this can't be happening baby wake up" He called out for you as his sobs turned into a breakdown. He saw the light in your eyes slowly disappear. He saw the love of his life leave him, even though you were right there.

It was a new day as the sun shone through Jungwon's curtains. Today, was your one month anniversary, of you getting engaged and also since you left. Today was the worst of all days. It had been a month? no way. "i wish i could turn back time and change everything" he mumbled.

Fast forward to him wishing of going back to a month prior to save you. He managed to save you, but lost his life. Not being able to manage with the grief of him gone, you tried to save him. You managed to do so, but you lost yours in exchange. And this continued.

The woman was right afterall when she warned the two you.

Trying to save eachother, the both of you were stuck and lost yourselves in an endless time loop.

@leaderwon 2024. Do not copy, translate,alter or plagarize in any platform.

[mysunshinetemptress]

part 2 of you promised? some serious grovelling from leah, she gets told off by all of her teammates (arsenal and england), basically more angst but leah is trying to make up for it, up to you whether they end up together or not

Mine

You promised part 2

Leah Williamson x reader

Leah had been lost from the minute you walked out the door. It had been a week since the break down of your relationship and you hadn’t returned home, Leah found herself sleeping on the couch waiting for your return hoping you would walk through the door and you could both sort it all out.

Two days later Leah found herself sitting at the gate in Luton airport with her mum who still wasn’t talking to her hoping you where going to show, only you never did and instead sent Leah’s best friend Alex Scott in your place “what’s going on Lee.” Leah felt her chin wobble as tears pricked her eyes “not that I don’t love you Al but where is she.” Alex looked at Leah confused “all I know is she came to my door yesterday handed me a plane ticket with my name on it and told me you where going to need me so I’ll ask again what’s going on.” Leah sighed looking to her mum who looked at her eyes filled with sorrow “I messed up.” Alex looked at Leah eyebrows knitting together “what do you mean.” Leah shook her head trying to stop herself from crying “I made a promise to go to her final match of the season for our home team in Newport Pagnell and I didn’t go I went to the Arsenal on instead Al, it was their game winning match she captained them to the biggest win in years and I stood on the sidelines of Meadow Park crying over Rafa leaving…I…..” Leah couldn’t help it anymore as she cried feeling all the guilt weighing on her heart again “that’s not even the worst part.” Leah shook her head at her mums words “I…oh…god I was mean.” For the first time in days Amanda grabbed Leah in to a hug. “I’m so sorry mum I’m so sorry.” Alex lay her hand on Leah’s lower back giving it a squeeze trying to comfort her friend as concern etched her features “I know Bubba trust me I do but I’m not the one you should be apologising to.” Leah sniffed turning back to Alex “I was so mean to her, I oh god Al I told her she wasn’t important that her match wasn’t important enough for me to go to that I get bored watching her.” Alex looked at Leah horrified “Le I love you you’re my best friend but what the fuck, you know better then anyone Y/ns fears of never being good enough.” Leah sobbed harder “I don’t know what to do I’m so lost she won’t answer my calls or texts she hasn’t come home I hoped she would come to this and we could talk oh I’m so stupid.”

Holly,Ben and Kiera followed the three women out a few days later and for the first time in their lives Leah and Holly weren’t talking. Two days into the trip with everyone there Amanda handed Holly her phone ushering her out of the room. Holly returned shortly after siting beside Leah before turning to her “ you fucked up big time and I’m still mad at you but for this holiday at least I’ll pretend like it’s the good old days ok.” Leah looked at Holly confused “ok.”

The trip to Ibiza had been the break Leah needed but she found herself longing for you every waking minute, she understood that she had messed up and promised to do whatever it takes to remind you how much she loved you if it took her the rest of her life.

You on the other hand had stayed with your parents for a few days before leaving to Tegan’s ignoring your phones constant buzzing. It was either Leah, her family or her teammates and although you desperately wanted to reply you kept reminding yourself they where her family and friends not yours. Of course none of them understood that which is why they had been blowing up your phone the past few weeks and at this stage Lia had grown even more concerned after going to your house only to find you weren’t there and hadn’t been in weeks that led to the first time Leah had to tell her friends.

“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU HAVE BROKEN UP.” Lia shouted, it was the last team bonding before everyone split for the World Cup, Leah hadn’t expected to be interrogated the minute she arrived “ehm well you see.” Katie turned shaking her head “you have to be taking the piss yeah, I mean seriously Leah what the hell happened that the girl who looks at you like you hung the moon.” Leah couldn’t help the tears falling “I made a promise and I didn’t keep it and when she called me up on it I was mean to her, calling out her insecurities and making her feel small, all because I was annoyed at myself for not going, for not supporting her." The arsenal girls stood frozen listening to their captain "Leah when was this" Leah sniffed trying to clear her head "The 27th our last match Rafas last match, Y/ns most important match oh god guys I really fucked up" Beth shook her head "mate you have to be more specific." Leah sighed before beginning to tell her team mates about the day that plagued her mind every moment.

The Arsenal girls all looked at Leah shocked as Lia stood looking at her best friend in disbelief "I can't believe you." Leah looked at her best friend heart clenching "Lia please i.." Lia shook her head "No Leah I can barley look at you how could you break her heart like that." Leah looked around at the disappointed group of girls before looking at the floor "Leah, that's the only match she has ever asked you to attend." Leah looked at Lia confused "no its not" Lia could feel herself get more annoyed at her friend "yes it is Leah, that girl felt so nauseous at the thought of asking you to a match played in a field she called me crying, and when I made it to your house I found her hovering over the toilet, she thought it was so beneath you for you to attend it took me an hour to convince her." Leah looked at Wally shocked "And when you agreed nothing could wipe the smile off her face she talked about it for days telling everyone." Lia shook her head getting upset on your behalf "I can't I'm sorry I can't even talk to you anymore." Lia sighed walking out the door as Leah looked at the rest of her teammates "I'm Sorry" her teammates just looked at her shocked before Beth spoke "we aren't the ones you need to apologise to Le, that girl is your biggest supporter and the only time she asked for you to be hers you let her down, Arsenals have won trophies and taken part in some amazing matches, seen teammates come and go but clubs like hers where they haven't won in a decade and they have their half time debrief on the side of the pitch, days like the 27th mean everything to them its their Wembley and Emirates and they want the most important people there and you couldn't even do that."

The Arsenal girls had made sure Leah knew where they stood, and although you wouldn't respond to their texts they made sure to let you know that too. The Arsenal girls adored you but the Lionesses where a totally different ball game. You had made the promise to the team that you would fly out to watch them partake in the World Cup the girls clamming you where like a good-luck charm, you tried to dismiss the statement but ultimately it had stuck.

Leah sat beside her mum nervously on the plane waiting to begin their long journey to the other side of the world when she turned at the sound of her mum gasping turning in her seat to get a better look at what her mum had just witnessed only to be met with your eyes staring at her "Y/N" you smiled sheepishly "Hi" Leah went to stand before feeling Amanda grab her arm as you moved to sit the far side. Amanda turned pulling you into a hug "oh my darling I've missed you, I cut believe your coming." You smiled at the older woman "I swore to Jacob that id be there and I also promised the girls id be in the stand for every match so, of course I'm here." Leah couldn't help but feel the guilt bubble in her stomach at your words, you had promised her brother and squad you would spend thousands of pounds to fly across the world to watch them play and visit. Leah could only imagine what would have happened if she had made the squad but you had answered her question, you would have seen the money to come watch her play in the World Cup, like a good supportive girlfriend and she couldn't even get herself to drive up the road to your match.

Australia was a different planet, you still refused to speak to her let alone look at her but Leah was happy that you hadn't let it get in the way of your relationship with her mum and brother both so excited you had made the trip.

Leah felt sick when Sarina asked if you both wanted to come say hi to the girls and for Leah to give them some words of encouragement. You declined the offer and so here was Leah stood on a pitch on the Gold Coast (I know very little about Australia but I think this was close to where they trained) staring at her squad "Alright girls." Alessia and Ella looked around confused "oy Skipper where's the missus." Leah stiffened "eh she won't be here today I'm afraid its just me." Leah couldn't help but notice the way everyones head moved slightly to look at her hands before she looked at them confused clearing her throat "We eh, hum we broke up actually." Lucy turned looking at Kiera who couldn’t stop looking at the floor before looking back at Leah “please tell me you didn’t do what I think you did cause I swear to god Leah I’ll break your legs.” Leah looked at Lucy confused “what are you on about.” Lucy shook her head “did you cheat on Y/n.” All of the squad let out gasps as Leah’s eyes widened in shock “what the fuck Lucy no never, I ehm.” Leah began explaining how she had fucked up your relationship while the squad found themselves getting more upset at their skipper “so she’s not here then.” Alessia let out sadly Leah shook her head “she is flew over with my mum and I, she made a promise to be here for you guys and that’s what she’s done same for Jacob, she’ll be at every game and so will I.” The girls nodded before Mary spoke “you better fix this though Cap, that girl is the best thing to ever happen to you besides football.” Leah shook her head “no she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me full stop Mary, I know that now and trust me I’ll spend the rest of my life telling her that if it means she’ll give me another chance.” Lucy walked over grabbing Leah’s shoulder “you fuck this up again and I’ll kill you you understand.” Leah nodded before thanking the girls and leaving back to the hotel.

The first few matchs Amanda stood in between the pair of you until the first match of the round of 16, Amanda left to go to the toilet when Leah turned to look at you already catching you staring before she spoke “I never thanked you for coming.” You shook your head “I wouldn’t miss this for the world, but I have to say it’s odd not seeing you out there and instead here answering all of our questions like a pundit.” Leah laughed feeling the tension slip away “I’m.” You shook your head as Leah began to speak “I’m not ready for that yet, but I’m tired of is acting like strangers so while we are here for the rest of the tournament can we please go back to being friends.” Leah smiled her heart hammering “I’d love nothing more.” The rest of the game Amanda stood watching you both interact like best friends her heart filling with hope that maybe her family would come back together.

The final had arrived and Leah had been pacing the hotel floor for about an hour nerves and anxiety hammering her system that was until she felt a hand slip into her own finger interlocking and a head resting on her chest as she stood frozen “your alright Le, I’m not going anywhere.” Leah looked down at you before closing her eyes feeling herself relax before she began to imagine you both back in your relationship “ I’m not even playing and my nerves are shot.” You smiled hearing her heart beats fast rhythm “they are still your team injury or otherwise and this is still a very big game for your best friends your nervous for them to achieve their dream to show the world how powerful they are but your anxious about missing out on this opportunity and not living in the moment for them so do me a favour and forget about it and and just focus on us right here right now.” Leah stood frozen looking at you bewildered “how do you always know what’s going on in my head and how to fix it.” You smiled up at her “I’ve known you since before you where Leah Williamson Arsenal Academy player let alone England Captain I’ve loved you just as long it’s my job.” Leah closed her eyes once more relaxing into you getting lost in the imagination of you both reunited as lovers “thank you.” You nodded into her chest squeezing her hand “always Le.”

The girls lost and to say everyone was devastated but you couldn’t help but hold Leah as she cried into chest heartbroken for her team, for England. “I’m a bit biased but maybe they are just waiting on you aye.” Leah chuckled slightly pulling away from you clearing her eyes before shaking her head “I think you might be yeah.” You grabbed her hand intertwining them together “come on let’s go see the girls.”

Leah had hoped after you returned to England you might stay the same friends that is and to her hopes you did acting like the friends she once remembers you being before the late night kisses and lazy days spent cuddling.

Leah’s ACL journey had been progressing well and you had been texting her frequently sending words of encouragement as well as liking and reposting her milestone videos as you returned to training with Tegan and the girls preparing to move up in the league.

It had happened all at once and Leah felt as though she had been hit by a bus at the image of you sat with a girl she had never met arm wrapped around your waist and you leaned into her laughing. You where hers.. shit key word where, you had the freedom to date whoever you wanted but that didn’t stop Leah appearing on your doorstep at three in the morning covered in water from the heavy rain banging on your door. You trudged down the stairs swinging open the door before running your eyes in shock at a shivering Leah “I’m sorry I am so so so sorry Y/n.” Ignoring her babbling you pulled Leah into your house scolding her “are you crazy Le you could catch pneumonia in that weather.” Leah didn’t respond instead she continued to apologise as you looked at her confuse before pulling her into your arms before Leah cracked sobbing apologise into you chest “I’m so sorry Y/n oh my girl I’m so sorry please forgive me I can’t do this anymore my love please.” You looked at her confused before realising her words, sighing you squeezed her arm “come on Le let’s get you dried up and changed yeah.” Leah didn’t say anything just following your every move wrapping her arms around you.

You turned on the shower leaving to get towels before coming back “I’ll be just down stairs ok.” Leah grabbed her arm “please don’t leave please stay.” You nodded pointing to your bed “I’ll be just here ok.”

Leah came out a short time later finding you on the bed scrolling through your phone “I’m sorry .” You shook your head “it’s ok Le like I told you Always yeah.” Leah nodded siting beside you turning to look at you when you bumped her shoulder “I’m ready.” Leah looked at you confused “what.” You sighed “I’m ready now for your explanation for your apology all of it.” Leah sighed nodding “my words will never be enough to tell let alone show you how sorry I am.” You hummed in response “yeah but it’s a start.”

Leah sighed “I’m an idiot a selfish idiot who did something so stupid in front of her girlfriend who simply just wanted her efforts recuperated, who wanted to be shown she was loved and valued as much as she loves and values her partner.” You looked at the floor as Leah talked “y/n I have spent more of my life loving you than I have anything or anyone else, you have loved me just as much, you have celebrated me at my best and looked after me at my worst and supported me through it all.” Leah sighed grabbing you hand “and I’m so incredibly sorry for how I treated you in May. You didn’t deserve any of that, I messed up my priorities but I can promise you now I’ll never do anything like that again just please one more chance.” You sighed squeezing your hand “your right, I have loved you since before you signed the under 8s, I have loved you through it all and i will continue to do so but that girl who shouted at me in her parent’s kitchen who promised me an appearance at my final match day and then never showed is not the girl I fell in love with and I’m sorry Leah but until she returns I’m not giving you my head t just for you to break it again.” Leah sniffed “I can do that I can be the Leah you deserve.” You smiled kissing her cheek “come on let’s get to bed.” That night Leah slept on your chest taking in every breath you took.

Two months down the line and Leah was stood on the side of a field pitch screaming at you to push up and cheering when you did decked out in your New Jersey that she had specifically asked for. Leah had attended every match complete unprovoked and you could be more happier, the after match rituals often being either you or her ending up in one of your apartments watching I’m a celebrity.

But today everything changed Newport Pagnell where playing Notts County. Leah was stood next to her family and your parents cheering for your squad until you went down in the 75yh minute. You had been marked by to players who’s favourite line to use was no mercy and that came to light as one of them stook their foot between your legs knocking you forward as the other kicked right at your head clocking you head on. You dropped like a sack of potatoes as the entire Williamson/y/l/n support squad gasped before falling silent. Leah twitched wanting to run onto the pitch and pull you close but she could to shocked to move as Tegan appeared turning you over before shouting for an Ambulance. Leah didn’t care after that running on to the pitch to your side studding your bloody face. “Oh Y/n shit darling please wake up.” Leah knew how dangerous concussions where but she had never seen a head trauma like this “Tegan, where are the medics.” Tegan looked at Leah confused “it’s a Sunday league our manager is the medic with that stupid bag she needs an ambulance.” Leah nodded grabbing your hand staring at you “please darling I need you to wake up.”

A little while later the ambulance arrived assessing the situation before putting your unconscious body onto a back board and onto the stretcher Leah ran after you only to be stopped by the paramedics “sorry who are you to the patient.” Leah turned looking to your parents “her girlfriend im her girlfriend please.” The paramedics nodded pointing at the seat for Leah to sit in before closing the doors and taking off to the hospital.

You don’t remember closing your eyes or how you ended up in an unfamiliar place but you didn’t care all you wanted was Leah as you looked around the room desperately “hey hunny it’s ok relax your ok.” You looked at your mum shaking your head “Leah where is she I need her mum please.” Your mum nodded “ok ok I’ll call her she just went to get a drink ok hold on.”

Leah ran up the stairs before bursting through your room doors “I’m here I’m here.” Leah looked around the room panicking before spotting you wide awake “oh my love, I oh my god.” You stretched out your hand begging her to take it before pulling her towards your “you gave me such a fright Y/n I thought I’d lost you god please don’t do anything like that again.” You smiled up at the older girl hand playing with the hairs behind her neck “your here.” Leah nodded “I wasn’t leaving you no way not this time.” You smiled eyes beginning to fill with tears “I love you.” Leah nodded “I love you.” You shook your head at her words “no le I love you, I’m in love with you, I want you.” Leah looked at you shocked before feeling her self begin to smile “I’m getting a deja vu moment here.” You laugh “oh shush.” Leah laughed pulling your face closer “mine.” She whispered gently.” You sighed “only if you promise to look after my heart this time.” Leah nearly hit your head with how fast she nodded “I vow to you my one and only I will love you till the earth stops spinning and I will never treat you like that again it’s stupid I had to learn from a mistake in our relationship but I know now at you are my beginning and end my everything not that silly little game.” You laughed “hey I love that silly little game.” Leah smiled “more than me.” You shrugged “depends can you still kiss me as well as you used to.” Leah laughed “kiss me and find out.” Before pulling you into a passionate kiss “I love you till the earth stops spinning yeah.” You smiled “I love you to the stars coming calling Le.”

[d0youc0py]

Hi! Really love all your works! You write boys so good!

I saw, that your requests are open, so I want to make request for the first time) (Feel free to ignore it, if you don't like the idea or find it triggering. TW: panic attack, abuse)

Can you write a one short for the 141 boys plus Konig, where during fight with their s/o (reader), they accidentally send reader into a panic attack? Maybe the cause of this reaction is a story of abuse in the reader's past or something like that. How would boys react? What would they do?

Thank you in advance!

P.S. Sorry for grammar or semantic errors, english isn't my mother tongue.

He was on you in an instant. It always seemed like nothing got past him- and your instant change in demeanor was no exception.

Your hands pressed against his stomach, trying to create some form of distance between the two of you. With gritted teeth- he obliged.

“I shouldn’t have been so firm with you, Honey. I’m sorry.” His voice was soft, like the John you knew. It didn’t comfort you like it usually did.

“It’s alright.” You gasped, your body feeling like it was being weighted down by chains.

“Don’t pacify me. It’s not alright.” John pressed. His hand raised but quickly went back to his side when he saw your hesitation to be touched. Your eyes fled up to his, waiting for him to get angry again at your rejection, yet all you saw were his heavy blue eyes. Heavy with hurt and anger, yet you instinctually knew none of it was at you. “You look like you’re about to pass out. Let me help you, please. Let me fix this sweetheart.”

You didn’t have the energy or wits to refuse.

You couldn’t tell if he was asleep or not. His breaths were always light and careful even if he was fast asleep. You however were a mess. Shaky, cold yet sweaty, your heart pounding a mile a minute. You pulled the covers back and slowly slipped out of bed. You glanced behind you, half praying he was awake and would usher you back to bed. You could almost hear the displeased rumble coming from his chest as he patted you back to sleep. But not so much as a stir came from him. You crept into the bathroom, sitting on the toilet lid, holding a towel over your mouth to muffle your sobs. A familiar wave of weakness wash over you. Your mind instantly fled to flight mode.

The events of tonight made you wonder if there was anyway to revive your relationship. He completely shut down- only opening his mouth to give a few verbal jabs here and there. This wasn’t the first time you had sobbed to yourself in the bathroom, but you had never felt heartbreak quite like this before.

“You alright in there?” You jumped at the gruff voice on the other side of the door.

You took a quick breath offering a pitiful “yeah”. Suddenly the door opened and you quickly leapt up, your first instinct to shut the door. His heart sank when he caught sight of you.

“Sweetheart.” Simon said quickly. He used his body to keep you from shutting the door. You used the towel to wipe your face- a little too harshly for his liking. His hand came up, pulling your hands away from your face. “Fucking hell.” He grumbled, mostly to himself.

“I’m sorry.” You started. He quickly hushed you, a displeased rumble leaving his chest just like you had imagined.

“Not your fault.” He shushed. “I was an ass, Lovie. I knew how you would react I still chose to go about things the way I did. I’m sorry.” He tilted your chin up, running his thumb across it.

Your breathing was shallow- not that he could tell over his shouting. He was a hothead and it was reminding you all too much of your past. Your hands pulled at the collar of your shirt hoping it would ease the feeling of your world falling in on you. The living room was suddenly too small. The TV suddenly too loud. The lights suddenly too bright. Your head felt too light. Your skin too itchy and your body too twitchy. Johnny’s burning blue eyes flickered from place to place making you wonder if you even still needed to be there. He seemed fine carrying on this argument with himself. Yet you were frozen. His growling voice suddenly stopped.

Your eyes left the floor to glance at him. He watched you with careful blue eyes, that softened by the minute. He was assessing you and he quickly realized it wasn’t good.

“Bon?” His voice was warm- familiar.

“Please stop yelling Mac.” You whispered. He nodded his head in agreement clearing the distance between the two of you.

“Is it too soon for me to say I’m sorry.” He questioned. He leaned against the wall, slowly guiding your shaky form towards him. “Christ.” He murmured, holding his lips firm against your head. “I know better and I should’ve done better, Bon.”

He was a fairly patient man- especially when it came to you, but he was losing his mind. His trained ears only being able to focus on your sniffles and you trying to get your breathing back to normal. His molten eyes stared straight ahead, his body twitching to go to you. He had lost his temper- not so much at you but at a situation. By the time he realized just how badly he had upset you- it was too late. You practically begged him to give you space and he obliged- kind of.

The couch creaked as he stood, quietly making his way towards the bedroom. He knocked softly against the doorframe, like one move would startle you like a scared deer. He was right, you jumped.

“Ky, I’m alright. I promise.” You assured, your face half buried in a pillow. He wanted you to seek comfort from him. He sat down and slowly moved the tear stained pillow away from your face.

“Let me take care of this, please.” He whispered, pressing a gentle kiss below your ear.

He was furious that he had let himself go like that. Part of his job was keeping his emotions in check and he couldn’t do that for the one person it really mattered. He was so upset he hadn’t even noticed how distraught you were until nearly ran out of the room. He had talked you down, apologies flowing from his lips till he saw some sign that you were believing him.

He had coaxed you into his arms- the place you would stay for as long as you’d wished to. At least that’s what he told himself. But the way his arms wrapped so tightly around you it appeared to be much more of his decision than yours.

“I hope you can forgive me, Schatz.” He said it aloud but it felt like he was talking more to himself.

“You didn’t know Konig.” You muttered. He winced at the formality of his name. No “Konnie” or “Kon” or some random German word you had decided to be his nickname for the day.

“Don’t make excuses for me.” He ran a hand up and down your back. “No one deserves that treatment less than you. I’m sorry I scared you, it won’t happen again.”

Thank you for your kind words! Hope you liked it! Writing this made me realize how little I write Konig. 🩷

[devflamme]

Am I Making You Feel Sick?

Summary: Agatha and Lilia having a talk about Agatha's relationship with Rio. Mother issues ensue.

Words: 888

Pairings: Agatha Harkness & Lilia Calderu, Agatha Harkness/Rio Vidal

Warnings: None. There are some headcanons here and there, like: the coven having visions of themselves since they went in the Witches' Road because of Lilia, and Agatha having anxiety. Title from Strangers by Ethel Cain.

English is not my first language / Dividers by @/cafekitsune.

Agatha looked up from where she was sitting in that big disco, noticing Lilia in front of her, holding her hands together in front of her body as she looked down at the younger witch with an analyzing, all-knowing expression. Agatha frowns and then arches an eyebrow up, looking around to find the rest of the coven – Teen was looking for anything hidden in the trial together with Alice and Jennifer, while Rio was… being herself. Looking at Agatha from the corner of the room, watching her like a hawk.

“What?” Agatha blurts out and Lilia sits beside her. Agatha frowns harder, already wanting to know what the clairvoyant had to say – and hoping it was quick, she didn’t want anymore trouble with the coven after cheating in the last trial they were in. Lilia only sighs and Agatha rolls her eyes, crossing her arms like a petulant child. Just how she looked in Lilia’s eyes. “What do you want, oldie?”

“You and the Green Witch,” Lilia starts. Agatha shivers slightly, feeling a hot sensation near the start of her neck. She reaches to touch it, noticing how hot her neck felt from the rest of her body. She could also feel the small scar tissue near her collarbones from the day Rio attacked her in her home – ‘touch’. “You both have a very complicated history, don’t you?”

“What makes you say that?” Agatha rasps out, still feeling hot on the neck like she always did when she was close to Rio or when someone even mentioned her. She did not know why she always reacted like this – she would never know. Rio makes her feel sick. “Jealous, oldie?”

Lilia only chuckles humourlessly. “Stop avoiding my question, Harkness. I’m trying to make conversation with you.”

“I do not want to have a conversation.” Agatha answers, gritting through her teeth angrily. She was feeling too many eyes on her – not a good sign – and it was making her feel extremely uneasy. She could feel Lilia’s analyzing, seeking eyes together with Rio’s jealous, crazed eyes – not a good sign.

“Is her anger towards you related to the story Jennifer told me?” Lilia asks, her voice more low since she could notice the younger’s uneasiness towards their conversation and Rio’s presence close to them. Agatha looked at her own hands and, for a second, she could see her fingertips tinted with black – corrupted with black. Agatha shakes her hands as if she was shaking water out of them. Lilia frowns. “Are you okay?”

“No. Clearly not. I probably just had one of your visions again, oldie.” Agatha mumbles and Lilia scoffs. Since they entered the Witches’ Road, every single one of the coven members had a vision of the future of themselves more than once. Having Lilia here as the Clairvoyant clearly had an effect on them – Lilia’s clairvoyance was clearly so powerful that it had affected the coven members, too. “Do I really have to answer your question? Everyone hates me enough for what I did, I don’t want to live that day again.”

“I’m not judging you now.” Lilia says. Agatha looks at the older woman, noticing how genuine her words sounded, so different from when they first talked – maybe because of Agatha’s acts towards her, but still – at her store. Agatha only stares at Lilia’s eyes. They had almost the same shimmer that Evanora’s eyes had, but Lilia’s looked softer while Evanora’s looked harsher. Angrier. “I could judge you for a lot of things, but I’m not. I want to talk with you.”

Agatha does not answer. She chokes back a sob, waiting for Lilia to make fun of her, but it never came. It was like she never noticed how Agatha was close to breaking in front of her after receiving understanding words from the person she least expected. Lilia looks away, her eyes to the front, noticing how Rio still stared at them, but her eyes were not mad, just… curious. Like she wanted to get closer and discover why Agatha was almost sobbing after having such a small conversation – if you could call it a conversation – with Lilia. Rio knew when Agatha was sad – she always knew how to distinguish Agatha’s feelings. She could mess up every single piece that was Agatha Harkness’ puzzled personality and just put it together again by memory.

“Yes,” Agatha chokes out, her voice low as a whisper. Her eyes search for Teen, looking at the boy in the other corner of the enormous room, chatting away with Jennifer as they search around. Great, he did not see this. She did not need Teen’s worried eyes on her. ”It is mostly because of what I did. She did her… own horrible things, but I was the worst.”

“What makes you say that?” Lilia questions. She wasn’t touching Agatha, but her voice felt like a caress on Agatha’s back, comforting her and giving her what she needed since she lost her mother – understanding. “You both should talk.”

“Say that to the bitch,” Agatha grits through her teeth again and Lilia gives her a reprimanding look. Agatha sighs, looking down like a petulant child, again. “Say that to her, that she needs to talk with me, without knives, and then we can get even.”

“That is not my job, Agatha. That’s yours.”

[as-is-above-so-below]

The Captain - Simon Riley x Sniper!Reader, Wife!Reader

Part 6: Darling

summary: Ghost’s sniper wife (reader) joins Task Force 141 on an op, against his wishes call sign: Freyja warning: implied sexual content, MDNI Note: PART 6 HAS ARRIVED! Thank you for all of your support! A special thank you to @lethalchiralium and @peachesofteal for workshopping with me, per usual, and being my beta! Enjoy and blessed be! (p.s. ghost drinking an orange sodie lol) << Previous | Next >>

Simon could hear his daughter’s screams as he came up the walkway to their front door, duffel slung over his shoulder. He had returned from a month-long deployment an hour ago and only allowed himself enough time to debrief and return his weapons once on base before hopping in his car and heading home.

He entered the house, still in full gear (mask and all), to find his heavily pregnant wife pacing the living room, their crying daughter in her arms. Her eyes and cheeks were red when she turned to the door, sobbing in relief at the sight of him.

“Oh, sweetheart. What’s going on?” he asked, dropping his bag by the door and going to her.

“She has a-a cold.”

“I can see that.” He wiped at the snot and drool on Joanie’s lip with his glove. “Where’s Roach?”

“He went to pick König up. You didn’t see him?”

“No. Must’ve just missed ‘im.” When Price handed out assignments for their most recent deployment, Roach had offered (more like decided) to stay with Freyja for the duration of his absence. With König also deployed, it made sense for him to help her with the baby and housekeeping while Simon was gone. Better than staying on base – alone – for a month. Knowing someone was in the house with his family made him feel better about leaving for such an extended period, especially with his track record. The last time he had left the country, leaving his pregnant spouse behind…

Simon rubbed his daughter’s back, his heartstrings tugging at the thought of her being in pain. “Give ’er here, I’ll take a turn.”

“Si, no, you must be exhausted-”

“I am exhausted, which means I’m in no mood to argue. Go to bed, love, please.”

His pleading didn’t seem to affect her as she went back to doing laps around the couch. “The doctor said there’s nothing we can do. It just has to pass. I’ve tried everything. Chest salve, shower steam, saline – nothing’s working. Every-Every time we put her down or sit down, the screaming just gets worse. Can’t stop…moving, and your son is kicking the shit out of me-”

This was ironic, considering how Joan only kicked when Simon or one of their friends spoke or touched her belly. Now, their son only ever kicked for her.

“Freyja.”

She stopped her rambling and found he had stepped into her path; he firmly held her biceps and dragged his hands up and down. Freyja sniffled as another tear slipped down her cheek. No singular word could describe how she felt (and probably looked). Drained, fatigued, beaten, dog-tired; none quite did the trick.

“You look like shit. You need to get some rest.”

“No, Simon, please just go to…bed.”

Soon as Ghost took Joan and returned to massaging her spine, her wails simmered to quiet whimpers as she cuddled into him. She dropped her head onto his shoulder, little fingers hanging from the collar of his shirt to the top of his vest. Their baby was getting big, her senseless baby talk beginning to lean more toward coherent vocabulary. When Joanie cried a soft “Dada” against his neck, Freyja started to sob harder, the heels of her palms dug into her eyes. 

Shit. “What’s wrong? She stopped screaming bloody murder. That’s a good thing.”

“I’ve been trying to calm her down for hours! You come home, and after five minutes, you’ve fixed it. She hates me! She fucking hates me!”

“Frey, look at me.” He stopped comforting Joan for a moment to tilt his wife’s chin up, forcing her to listen to him. When she did, he took his hand back. “Babies see their mothers as an extension of themselves. She knows your heartbeat and breathing sounds; she gets food from you…”

“Who told you that?”

“…I read about it.”

Freyja softened, tears no longer flowing freely. “You read parenting books?”

“Of course I do. I want to be the best for them and you.” He pulled her into his chest with one arm, his covered lips pressing into her hair. “You are her mother. I could never take your place. You’re her home. But I’ve been gone for a month, and I’ve never been away from her this long. There’s something to be said about missing her dad and wanting some comfort.”

When Simon brushed her tears away, she turned to kiss his palm, then rested her cheek there. Freyja didn’t know how, but her husband sure had a way with words, always knowing how to make her feel better. 

“Better?”

“Mhm,” she hummed and, before she could reach to pull his mask up, Joanie whined in frustration, kicking her legs impatiently, about to start up again. Simon chuckled and let his wife go, his heavy boots thunking against the hard floor as he began what would be a long night of getting his steps in. 

“Good. Now do as Daddy tells you and go to bed. Don’t make me tell you again.”

.

.

.

Coming up on the end of her pregnancy, the ‘waddling’ stage was in full swing. If Freyja thought she was big just before Joan was born, she was almost certainly a whale now, and she was losing energy much faster than before. This time around, though, they were sure to schedule a c-section for the week before her due date. The OB didn’t put up much of an argument with her medical history and Joan’s early arrival.

Her phone pinged again as she rounded the corner toward her husband’s office.

And again.

Joan’s irritable whines became more evident as she closed in on her destination. “Si, I can only move so fast.”

“Oh, thank god.” Ghost detached Joan’s iron grip from his mask while she was distracted. She continued to kick her little legs against him, trying to get away. “She’s antsy. I can’t get her down for shit. She’s sick of me.”

He wheeled his chair around the desk and tugged her missing sock back on (to her protest) until he reached the other side and placed her feet on the floor. “See? Mum’s here. Go see her,” he cooed, her tiny hands gripping his thumbs for support.

“Dad Ghost” as she had lovingly coined Simon in his work attire, was a walking contradiction. An arguably massive man, a masked mystery to majority of the population on base, snapping otherwise cocky and egotistical soldiers back in line. Still, no one dared to laugh as he screamed at them for poor technique or a lackluster performance with a blonde baby on his hip or strapped to his back. It never failed to make her want to giggle, hearing such a soft, gentle tone from the big scary skull plate affixed to his balaclava. 

Freyja was halfway across the room when he stood their daughter between his comically large boots. “She won’t go that far,” she admonished. “If you give her too big of a task, she’s not going to even try-”

As if sensing her mother’s doubt, Joan took a steady step forward, still holding Simon’s hands in deep concentration. Then another, and another –

Until he couldn’t stretch forward anymore, and she let go, hobbling towards Freyja until she stumbled at her feet, letting out a soft baby grunt.

They both stared at each other in silence, eyes wide and mouths agape in shock. Neither spoke for a good minute, until Joanie pulled herself up again by Freyja’s cargo pants, babbling, “Mum mum mum mummm”, gnawing at the thick material and looking up with big, brown eyes.

“Did she just…?”

“I told you, she’s bloody brilliant.” Simon shot up to scoop the baby and place her in his wife’s waiting arms.

“My big, smart girl! I can’t believe it!” She squealed and giggled as Freyja peppered her face in fat, wet kisses and gently shook her. Ghost joined in, playfully nibbling at the rolls on the other side through the black material covering his face. Joanie smacked them both away, screaming with joy. Amongst all the commotion, Price stopped in the doorway on his way to their brief (which they were about to be late for). 

“What’s going on here?” he asked, fists on his hips in faux anger. “I thought we had an understanding! No fun at work without Granddad.”

“We officially have a walker on our hands!”

Price gasped and crossed the room in an instant. “And I missed it?!” He shoved the stack of mission folders at the lieutenant and stole his granddaughter from her mother, hiking her high up on his waist. “You walked without me? I’m offended, little miss, but I’ll settle for a victory lap.”

He plucked his green bucket hat off the top of his head and dropped it onto hers, earning a high-pitched shriek of delight when it covered her face. “Let’s roll, everybody. We’ve got a meeting to get to,” he commanded before marching down the hall. “Oi, lads! She walked!”

A chorus of cheers broke out in the distance, followed by a wall-shaking group chant, “Joanie! Joanie! Joanie!”

Freyja just stood there, pouting, arms crossed atop her belly. “Just once, I’d like to celebrate our baby’s milestones in peace.”

“You know that’s not possible, love.” Ghost chuckled next to her, offering a single pat to her ass as they headed to the briefing. While neither of them would be going, it was their job to know what was going on during their impending absence. The ruckus started to die down when the couple sat, and the others followed suit. Soap placed a mug of peppermint tea in front of her, which she thanked him for, and  Laswell, Gaz, and Soap filed around the table.

“Kӧnig and Roach should be here shortly,” Price said, bouncing Joan on his lap as Ghost passed out manila folders.

Gaz checked his watch with a furrowed brow. “It’s five past. Maybe they forgot?”

“Just give them a few minutes. I’m sure they’ll be here.”

“His office was closed, so he’s definitely in there. I can go grab ‘im. It’s no trouble,” he offered, the metal legs of his chair scraping against the floor as he stood up.

“Be my guest, Sergeant,” Freyja hummed, making eye contact with John as she sipped her tea, hiding her mischievous grin behind the cup. She waited for an appropriate amount of time, about how long it would take to take ten paces up the hall before she held up five fingers. 

“You’re a demon.”

“Five, four, three, two…”

“Verdammt nochmal!” 

There’s a loud bang, eerily similar to the sound of a six-foot-six body slamming into the floor. Boots thunder against the ground until Gaz appears in the doorway again, eyes wide and blushing like a madman.

“Genau deshalb habe ich das Militär verlassen, keiner von euch hat den Anstand, verdammt noch mal anzuklopfen!”

“Didn’t knock, did you.”

“Nope.”

“How bad?”

König stomped into the meeting, red as a tomato as he jerked his long, tangled (read: freshly fucked) hair into a knot at the base of his neck before slipping his hood on. Roach walked in behind him, grinning like an absolute idiot (read: clearly the one doing the fucking), albeit a bit flush, and his clothes untucked and wrinkled as he plopped beside John. 

“At least I didn’t get knifed this time.”

“Der Tag ist noch jung, Unteroffizier.”

“I don’t know what that means, but it sounded like a threat.”

“It was,” Freyja sang, her body shaking as she attempted to withhold laughter.

By the time Price had finished divulging the details of the op scheduled for the end of the month (which was also around the time of her c-section, which left Freyja and those deploying disappointed), Joanie had escaped his hold to crawl across the table and landed in her mother’s lap. She sat back against Frey’s round belly, happily gnawing on a teething ring while the captain combed her fingers through her soft, blonde curls. 

John cleared his throat and leaned back, tipping the chair on its back legs. “So…In a shocking turn of events, Roach is the top–”

“WHAT DID YOU SAY, CAPTAIN?!” Soap screeched after choking on his coffee, leaving a stain on his shirt as it dripped from his nose.

“Oh, mein Gott…” 

“I don’t know. What did I say, Sergeant?”

Across the table, Roach held his lips between his teeth as he wheezed, quickly signing, “Only for my king.”

“PLEASE PLÖTZE! Stop talking!” König, finally deciding he’d had enough, shot up from his seat and practically sprinted out of the room, almost bonking his head on the door frame on his way out. A moment later, he stormed back in and snagged his forgotten file awaiting him in Roach’s outstretched hand before turning back out.

Biting his lip, Soap muttered, “Interesting…” to himself, eyeing the Austrian’s retreating form before flicking back over to Roach. The Brit was already looking at him, probably having heard him being sat next to him. He winked with a devilish smirk, and practically purred, “S’alright, happens tae th' best o' us.”

.

.

.

A few days shy of their next mission, and the birth of the newest Riley, the gang gathered around their living room for one last game night before Roach, König, Soap, and John departed for another mission. Roach and König were less than pleased to be missing the birth of their godson, but it couldn’t be helped.

Kyle placed a red eight down on the stack of cards, ending his turn. “C’mon, mate, what’s the wildest thing you’ve done on a mission?” he prodded, raising a brow in Simon’s direction. “You know all our stories. It’s only fair.”

The two shared a knowing look, and Freyja giggled once before Kyle interrupted, “Besides that, you heathens.”

Simon pressed against the kitchen chair he had dragged in for himself, seriously considering what he would consider the most outlandish activity he had partaken in outside of combat. Particularly, that didn’t involve screwing his wife in places they shouldn’t, like public places, sniper lookouts, cars, or supply closets…

Before he could drift too far, he caught the saucy side-eye his wife was throwing him from her deep armchair.

“No.”

Soap peeked up from his hand with a quirked brow. “Does Ghostie have an embarrassing secret? Now we have to know!”

“It’s not a secret, and I’m not embarrassed by it just because I don’t flaunt it around,” he said, shot back the rest of his whiskey, and replaced his mask. Simon didn’t always wear it with their friends; he just so happened to feel inclined to it that night. There was no rhyme or reason as to when he needed the comfort; the urge just came and went as it pleased. 

He tried his best to sound completely disinterested, hoping the discussion would blow over as he threw down his card. “Blue.”

Unfortunately, his plan did not work, and all interest in their game of Uno was lost. Kyle threw his hand down on the table, completely giddy. “WHAT IS IT?! TELL US!”

Simon groaned, throwing his cards at his wife, who simply laughed. “See, look what you did.” He sighed and begrudgingly unhooked his mask from behind his ears, tossing that at her too. After a beat, he let his tongue loll out, revealing a silver ball.

Several (if not all) of their jaws dropped, save for Freyja’s, who was utterly thrilled that this was happening.

Johnny was the first to speak. “Is…that…” he stuttered, staring unabashedly in disbelief. 

He snapped his mouth shut again once everyone had had a decent look. “Alright, can we move on please–”

The Scot pounced across the space, clearing the coffee table as he knocked Simon out of his chair, taking them both down into a heap on the floor. They wrestled as he tried to dig his fingers into Ghost’s mouth and pry it open again. “LEMME SEE!”

“JOHNNY!” Simon roared, bucking and thrashing his hips in attempt to get the man off, but he quickly scooted up until he sat firmly on his chest, knees pinning his shoulders as he yanked the piercing back out.

“Awe, so that’s why you’re always fuckin’ like horny teenagers! Oh, ah bet that feels good on your cu-”

“SHUT UP, SOAP!” “THAT’LL DO!” 

Freyja whipped her slipper at Johnny’s head, which he swiftly dodged. Meanwhile, Gaz was face down on the floor, having a fit and struggling to breathe. Price looked like he would actually rather die than endure another moment of the scene unfolding at his feet. Kӧnig was carefully weaving between people and furniture to remove Soap before he got hurt, and Roach stayed in his spot, mouth open in silent laughter.

Thank God Joanie was a heavy sleeper.

“Are you gonnae sit there ‘n tell meh that a’m wrong? A husband should always eat arse!”

“JOHNNY, OH MY FUCKING GOD!”

Kyle finally caught his breath and cut back in, “But does it WORK?!”

Everybody froze, including Kӧnig, whose hands looped under Johnny’s armpits, about to extract him. From underneath him, Simon glared up at his wife (who started this whole fucking mess). “Freyja–”

But Freyja, being the brat she is and loving the chaos, “…It works.”

Simon covered his face with both of his now freed hands, so utterly sick of her shit as the sergeant shook his shoulders, he and Gaz both screaming like madmen. Kӧnig still hovered over them, ready to remove Johnny if Simon called for it, his red hair up in a neat top knot at the crown of his head. A few strands hung loosely by his ears and at the peak of his forehead, framing his pale skin.

“AAAAAYYYYYY, SO YOU DO GIVE GOOD HEAD!”

He removed his shield at that, looking up at Johnny with a confused expression. “Who said I don’t give good head?”

Price flinched with a crinkled nose and grabbed his hat from the back of the couch. “That’s my cue.”

“Scary guys either have monster cock or scary good head,” Kyle stated as if it were pure fact.

“But he has both.”

“I can’t fucking take this.” Simon finally shoved at Johnny and the Austrian lifted him with ease, standing the Scot back on his feet.

Soap dusted off his pants. “Damn, you’ll have’ta get one’a those, Köni,” he teased and turned to face the giant, looking up at him with a boyish grin. 

König’s skin, ever the shy one, immediately painted itself a rosy hue, unable to be hidden by any hood or mask. Even Roach was taken by his brashness and turned a little pink himself, choosing to sip his drink. König was, unfortunately, frozen in place, wide eyes staring down at Johnny’s proud face.

Three seconds pass.

Then two more.

Then three again.

“OH MY GOD, THAT WAS THEM?! The threesome you told me about a few weeks ago, was them?”

With nowhere else to go, König collapsed onto the couch and pulled the neck of his sweater over his face. “Verdammter Himmel, Johnny…” If he could crawl into a hole and die, he would.

“What can ah say? M’services are world-class.”

“Can confirm,” Roach added, having put his glass down so he could use both hands to talk.

Johnny raised a brow and dragged his eyes from Roach’s shoes, slowly up his shins, then his thighs and chest before settling on the challenging smirk on his freckled face. “‘S that so?” he asked, stepping into the space between Roach’s knees and the table.

Roach simply nodded, looking up at his boyfriend through hooded lashes, resembling a lovesick puppy with shocking accuracy. He knew exactly what he was doing, too, the tip of his tongue poking out between his teeth. Roach was a…talented flirt, to say the least.

His glass was carefully removed from his hand and placed on a coaster. Without a second thought, Soap wrapped his fingers around Roach’s wrist, dragged it behind his neck, and tossed the man over his shoulder. Gaz gaped, completely dumbfounded into silence – flabbergasted, if you will. He paused in the entryway, looking over his opposite shoulder.

“You comin’, Kö?”

König, still tucked away in the corner of the couch, peeked out from the cocoon he had created with his sweater. Even his forehead was tinged red, still. He openly stared for a bit before mustering up enough courage to rise again, and in an impossibly meek voice for such a large man, replied, “...Yes, sir,” and loosely tangled their fingers together.

Kyle threw his hands up then dropped them onto his head, dragging his cap back a bit. “WHAT IS GOING ON?!”

Freyja offered a sympathetic pat, her bottom lip jutted out. Poor Simon, who had returned to his seat, covered his mouth with one palm as he tried to contain his chuckles. He pulled his mask back on after retrieving it from the floor.

“Don’t worry, Gaz,” she said and poked his cheek. “We’ll find you a nice girl.”

“I GET AROUND FINE!” He swatted her hand away, glowering at her. “You’re all just a bunch of slags!”

He jumped up, abandoning his beer and putting his hat back in place. “Where’s my niece? I need to restore my innocence,” he grumbled, trudging upstairs.

“Simon, did he just call us sluts?”

“Yes, darling.”

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Copyright © 2023 as-is-above-so-below. All rights reserved.

[ninikrumbs]

After you

Satoru gojo x reader. birthday special. angst angst angst. im sowwy. changes to 1st person halfway through. fluff if you squint very hard. feat. Hiromi

You stirred gently out of your sleep, eyes slowly opening. And for a moment everything was hazy, then you realized you fell asleep on the sofa of your living room.

Pushing yourself halfway up, the sound of water dripping on paper caught your attention as you glanced down at the array of photos scattered beside your chest. A hand flew to your face when you realized the abundance of tears free falling from your cheeks to the mementos below.

Echoes of his voice and flashes of his smile still lingered in your glazed mind making your lips tremble as a knot of emotion lodged on your throat. It took everything in you not to sob.

All at once it came back to you, waking up in the middle of the night, unable to go to sleep. So you decided to go to the ktichen but stopping short when you habitually opened your phone and saw the date. Time halted to a stop, you stopped breathing altogether as your hands slightly trembled around the phone.

Everything was a blur after that, and somehow you found yourself at your living room with a box full of mementos from what seemed like a another lifetime ago. There was a time when the mere sight of this box - that you skillfully hid at the back of your closet - brought you to tears and sometimes it still does.

Memories of your youth stared back at you. From your high school days to the your time as a teacher at Jujutsu High. Photos of a white haired boy with a smile that could rival the sun made your heart ache. Especially the strip of pictures the both of you took in one of those vintage photobooths. The both of you looked so young, so happy, not yet tainted by the darkness of the world, still filled with so much hope for the future. Tears lined your eyes once more.

You didn't know when you fell asleep, probably when your eyes got too heavy. Wiping your tears, you stood up and walk to the window. The moon was bright and full, you often talked to the moon on nights like this. Talking to it as if he could hear your voice.

Hey, Satoru

Its been almost 6 years since you left. 6 years when my life got torn in half. When the news of your death shaked me to my core and my world came crashing down all at once.

I remember the denial and the anger. I cursed the universe for taking you away, before bargaining with every God and being out there to bring you back to me. And for a while I thought I'd never accept it and maybe some part of me still hasn't.

After the war against Sukuna, grief overtook me. I was a mere shell of who I used to be. Its like a noose was tied aroud my heart. Even breathing proved difficult in a world without you. My days were empty and monotonous. Only waking up to eat then sleep, and sometimes I wished I wouldn't wake up at all so that Id see your face once again. Its like I was drowning in the middle of the ocean, waves pulling me down, not a drop of hope that Id ever reach the shore.

I saw you everywhere. In the bright blue sky under the morning sun. In the beach where the seas reflected your eyes. When the snow falls and sticks to the ground. Things that once made me happy were then only constant reminders of what Ive lost.

And when I received the letter that you wrote to me, every word was a stab to the heart.

I want you to live, sweets. I want you to get everything , do everything you've ever wanted. To never settle. To love again- though Ill probably haunt him for his entire life.

It made me laugh bitterly, because didn't you know that everything I wanted died along with you?

Yet I tried, I tried for you, Satoru. And for the people around me.

After some time, I went out. Started teaching again, hoping to live up to the legacy you left behind. Ate lunch with Shoko, guided missions with the students and even a few dates. None of it mattered though, because in the end, I searched for you in every room, and in every person I met. Hoping for just a glimpse of your smile or the twinkle of your bright azure eyes.

Eventually, with a heavy heart, I came to realize that you don't get that lucky twice. That what we shared was a once in a lifetime occurence.

"There you are, sweetheart. Couldn't sleep?" A deep voice laced with sleep reached my ears.

I glanced up to see Hiromi, walking down the stairs only in a pair of sweatpants.

Once he reached my place by the window, he saw my glossy eyes, the pictures in my hands and the opened box at the bottom of the sofa.

His eyes softened, filled with warmth and understanding as he realized, "Ah, Ill go make us some tea."

Then I found Hiromi. Or better yet, he found me. He was so kind and strong, so solid and dependable. He met me at my lowest, he comforted me as I cried about you. He was the lifeboat that found me, and he didn't just throw a buoy for me hold onto but he dove head first into the raging ocean and held me in his arms as he swam me to shore.

I never understood how he fell inlove with me regardless of the endless emotional baggage that I carried. And he has proven to me time and time again that he more than willing to carry it with me. He was so good to me, I didn't deserve him, I knew that.

You would've liked him, Satoru. Hiromi's love breathed life into me. He made me warm and tingly inside. My stomach still does backflips at the sight of him. I was smiling again, enjoying life again. I could finally recognize the girl in the mirror.

It wasn't an easy journey though. In the beginning of our relationship, guilt would eat my insides when I kept comparing him to you. His brown eyes to your blue. How sometimes, he reminds me of you. And how for awhile when he kissed me, I felt your lips. It was unfair to him, I know. Yet he was so calm and patient, voicing nothing but understanding and assurances when I cried and confessed to him my selfish thoughts.

I followed him to the kitchen. "I didn't mean to wake you, Hiromi."

He glanced back at me, smiling softly. "Its okay, sweetheart."

We sat in companionable silence as he made tea, before he set the cups on the counter infromt of me.

After a moment, his hand cupped my face, caressing it gently, "Do you wanna talk about it?"

I shook my head, "No.. Im okay, really."

He let out a breath and pulled me close by the waist, before pressing a kiss on my forehead, "Im here, always."

Hiromi astounds me everday, because I dont know If I would react the same way if the situation was reversed.

I pressed my cheek to his warm chest, breathing him in as I hugged him back. "I know and you'll never know how grateful I am for that."

Pulling back, I stood on my tiptoes and gave him a chaste kiss. A sign of my gratitude, but not for more than a second. It would be unfair for me to kiss him more when you still lingered at the back of my mind.

Even though now, I don't feel your lips anymore, Satoru. I feel Hiromi's, which made me happy. I love him so much, he deserves so much more than the chipped heart than I can give him yet he says its all he wants.

Seeing the melancholic look in my eyes, Hiromi rested his forehead on mine, "Ill go to bed first."

I know he thinks I want space from him when I get like this, when my memories of you plague my mind but he couldn't be more wrong. I pouted, "No, please stay."

He was my constant reminder of everything good in my life, he kept me afloat. He never made me feel crazy or stupid for being so hung up about my dead boyfriend. He was a saint and Ill spend the rest of my life making it up to him, to love him like he deserves.

He chuckled, "Okay, I can whip us some pancakes if you want?"

"That sounds amazing." I grinned, albeit a bit watery.

I did what you wanted , Satoru. I lived and loved again. I never settled for anything less. Thanks to you I found happiness and love, things I thought I would never have again after you. Though you will always own a piece of me, a piece of my heart and soul and I never want it back.

Happy Birthday, Satoru.

The years we spent together are still my favorite.

To me, you'll always be 29 and beautiful. And until our next blue spring arrives, Ill continue to live the life you gave yours for.

This made me cry when I thought of it. Thoughts?

[auburnitzy]

KAHIDLAW

CHARACTERS – NAWA + MK (OC X CANON)

DISCLAIMERS – Unintended/Accidental Cause of Injury

SUMMARY - "It's all for you."

“... Don’t tear your head off nor stick your neck out for me.” Nawa murmured out of a blue. Her gaze was still trained on the distance, away from him, perhaps on purpose or hesitance.

That came out of nowhere.

Still, it doesn’t silence the lives around them. The push and pull of waves crashing on the shore. The sound of children giggling in the distance. Some chatter as the people on the docks pass by. None of them would be ingrained in his mind unlike the words that just spilled out from her lips.

“Why not?” With a tilt of his head, MK shot her a look of confusion and worry, something that he should have grown accustomed to in his years of friendship with her. “I’m starting to think like you’ve got something under your sleeves…”

“No, I’m just telling you in case something happens in the future.”

“... Okay, that definitely doesn’t sound ominous.” He squinted his eyes, studying her for any signs of trouble before sighing. “You know you’re making it sound like you have a death wish, right?”

For a split second, her eyes widened before she raised her hand to wave him off. “That’s not… is that how I really came across? That wasn’t my intention… but you get it, right?”

“... Yeah. Doesn’t mean I’ll stop worrying about the stuff you’re gonna get yourself into.”

...

… Is this what you meant?

He watches as a blue lotus floats past, followed by one and another before it eventually gives way to more, leaving blurs of blue blooms wading past their boat.

It wasn’t until a quick snap of fingers reeled him back in surprise, his attention returning to that of the other passenger in this quaint little boat.

“They’re utpalas,” Nawa murmured, that same infuriating smile that he grew to both despise and adore settled on her face as she held up a bloom to him. Now, it was just a reminder to him that it was just her way of trying to bring light into such a grim reality. “You probably know by now that…”

“... Each petal represents a death.” he murmured. It still doesn’t ease the revelation that weighed heavily in his shoulders. He’s not sure if it’ll even go away. Maybe it’s just something he’ll live with for the rest of his life, knowing that someone would willingly put themselves through different stages of hell just to get him where he is now. “Your deaths.”

A low hum breathed past her lips before she set the flower back into the waves, letting it float past along with its other kin.

“You still think it’s your fault, don’t you?” Nawa placed a palm on her cheek, staring at him with what could be called amusement and slight censure. Calm. How could you be so calm? How, in the face of such a terrible circumstance? “I told you it’s not. It will never be your fault. I’ll keep saying that until you get it.”

MK doesn’t respond, unsure if he’s even able to at this point. He wants to rip his hair out, maybe even lash out and throttle her– but he knows he wouldn’t ever really lay a finger on her. He simply can’t bring himself to.

“Flower petals fall–” Her hand settles in his hair, a familiar sensation he still finds comfort in, yet this time, it only brought forth frustration and indignance in its wake.

He finishes it before she can. “–But the flower endures.”

“The form perishes, but the being endures.” A grin curled into her lips once more before settling into a smaller one. “I’m surprised you even remember the stuff I say sometimes. It’s sweet. That’s why I adore you.”

And the dam breaks. He feels his eyes burn as his vision blurs, big fat tears welling in his eyes before it devolves into ugly, guttural sniffles and sobs. It honestly makes him feel like a baby, unsure if these tears were out of anger, sadness, or a torturous concoction of both.

Some part of him wants to hate her. Push her away so she could finally be free from the chaos that was him. Sever the threads of fate and destiny that tangled them both – but he knows he cannot. She won’t let him.

A thumb brushes a tear away from his eye. Even then, he couldn’t bring his gaze into hers, giving nothing but clenched teeth and furrowed brows in exchange for her worried glance. It frustrates him to no end, how she could care for him despite his harsh treatment and attempts to push her away.

He hates how genuine it is. How genuine she is, because it makes it more unbearable for him to hate her in general. Even the thought of it unsettles him. The feeling was scary, the direct opposite of what he truly felt.

He condemned her to this. The least he could do is to stop being ungrateful and be honest with both her and himself– because deep down, that’s what he wanted. The only thing that made him hesitate was the fact that she’s being punished for the sin of simply caring for him– both as a friend and a lover.

His hand grasps her wrist, clutching it with an iron grip. “Why won’t you hate me?!”

“I love you.”

“Hell, even abandon me?!”

“I love you.”

“Why do you insist on protecting me?!”

“I love you.”

“Stop saying that and tell me the truth!”

MK’s chest heaved up and down, his grip tightening to the point that purple splotches slowly started to form on the skin of her wrist.

Realizing this, he quickly lets go and shoots her a look of contrition and panic, only to be met with the same irritatingly calm and resigned smile she held only for him.

“... What else can I even say?” She spoke as if he didn’t just harm her. Grip her to the point that it left ugly bruises on her skin. “I love you and that’s all there is to it.”

[sserpente]

A/N: Can you believe that I couldn’t bring myself to watch the Loki Season 2 Finale more than once yet? Maybe this little piece of fluff will help us heal a little more!

Words: 837 Warnings: HEAVY SPOILERS FOR THE SEASON 2 FINALE, fluff

Christmas felt off. Yule felt off. You’d set up your tree, you’d decorated, you’d bought all the Christmassy food including half a dozen bottles of mulled wine and you were listening to Christmas music non-stop. None of it worked. Something was missing. Someone.

The promise that had hung from Loki’s lips remained heavy and it had clawed its way deep into your heart. You’d talked about it one night, resting after hunting down an actor-turned-TVA-agent. About your future together. About where you would go and what you would do once all of this was over.

That was before everything fell apart. Before Loki realised that the only way… no, stop.

Right now, you were baking Christmas biscuits—you were forcing yourself to. Christmas music was blasting from your phone in the background, the warm air in the kitchen smelled like vanilla and gingerbread and outside, it was snowing, making you appreciate the warm and flickering candlelight coming from the wreath on the dining table even more. You were supposed to be happy, you ought to be joyful, no? He had sacrificed everything, sacrificed himself in order to protect… to protect… it was all so complex it went above your head. All you knew was that thanks to the cheeky God of Mischief, the multiverse was free.

Thanks to him, you were alive and well, thanks to him you could live a life you’d always dreamed of having. And yet, it meant nothing without him. And yet, all you wanted to do was to break down, ram your fists into the ground over and over, and wail for the loss of your one true love.

Yule, Christmas, whatever you wanted to call it, wasn’t the same if the one person you wanted to spend it with was gone. But you knew he could see you. You knew he was watching over you. And it wouldn’t be fair to let him see your grief after what he’d done for you all.

So you swallowed it down, again and again, and, humming along to the Christmas songs, focused all of your attention on the cookie batter. It was his favourite kind. The only kind you’d be baking this year.

“Hmm… this does smell delicious. I do hope they’re all for me…”

Your heart dropped to your stomach as you flipped around, flour landing everywhere around you in the process like a smoke cloud.

For a moment, you simply stared at him, lips parted, eyes filling with tears. “Please… please tell me you’re real.”

Loki smirked, extending his arms—a smug invitation for you to hug him. “Why don’t you find out, love?”

It was all he needed to say. You all but flung yourself into his arms, face pressed against his chest, listening to his heartbeat. No illusion. No duplicate. Him. He was actually here.

“Loki… oh gods, Loki…” The tears came before you could stop them. Worsening your sight and making you sob, you hugged him so tightly you feared to cut off his air supply. “But… how… how? How is this possible?”

“It appears that not only have I become the new temporal loom but… my powers have been feeding on the multiverse and vice versa. I became stronger and stronger until I realised I would be able to move around within it freely. I tested it, carefully, for what felt like an eternity until I was sure the threads of all the realities wouldn’t snap on me.”

“So… you’re saying the entirety of the multiverse is still flowing through you right now?”

“It is indeed. You just can’t see it.”

“You’re not going to… explode on me, right?”

“And turn into golden glitter?” He lifted your chin up, smirking and you chuckled but when his smile faltered, yours did too.

“W-what?”

“I’m sorry.”

You frowned. “For what?”

“For leaving you. For being the reason you cry yourself to sleep at night.”

Once again, your heart dropped to your stomach. “You… know?”

“Of course I do.”

“I was trying to hide it so hard…” Loki wiped a tear from your cheek with his thumb, a gentle smile tugging on his thin lips.

“I know,” he said, pressing you close. “I came here as soon as I could to be sure it would be safe to do so.”

“You… haven’t seen anyone else yet? What about Mobius?”

“Mobius is with his family, setting up a Christmas tree with Jetski decorations.”

You giggled.

“No. You were the most important. And I want to spend Christmas with you just like I promised I would. And I see you have already made sure to set the mood.” He looked around, noting all the decorations around you.

Your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes. “There’s no Christmas mood without you.”

Loki pulled you back toward the door threshold leading to the living room. You looked up at him, gaze wandering up to where you’d put up the mistletoe. And as far as kisses went… this one was the most magical and wondrous yet.

A/N: I'm really bad at reposting my Insta and Clock App stuff on here too and it's a New Year's resolution to change that next year so that you guys will be up to date as well but basically... I've published too books in my absence in case you were wondering why it got so quiet, lol. Aaaand I'm currently working on an English (my first English series!) paranormal Dark Romance series with demons and witches so if that's something you're interested in, do follow along, yes? ♥♥♥ We're all mad here! :D

PS: Loki becoming the wireless battery of the multiverse is my headcanon, thank you.

[dee-writes-anime]

Lalalalalalaala I'm back, I don't know if I already have another one pending in your requests but eh

yesterday I finished SS2 and it ruined me completely, I'll never be the same i think, now im reading the manga and honestly i saw a few spoilers and im terrified for megumi man, i don't want him to die!!😭🫠

Sigh, anyways, how about like megumi x reader, but it's like after everything settles and the world goes back to normal,and reader is a feeling a bit better (assuming they fought too) and when they wake up and see megumi in Jujutsu high,they just start sobbing and hugging him telling him how precious he is and how scared they were for him,

This is so cringe man I'm cringe but I'm free!! I need megumi to know he's loved he deserves absolutely everything

You're Everything to Me with Megumi Fushiguro

FEATURING Megumi Fushiguro x Reader

SUMMARY In the aftermath of devastation, he is your light

CONTENT WARNINGS angst, dark subjects like suicidal thoughts (please know your boundaries, your mental health is more important), fluff, two cuties in love, only edited ever so slightly T-T

AUTHORS NOTE You go anon! Live in your cringe! Own the cringe! And keep giving me more content ideas! Hope you enjoy <333

The silence was a suffocating thing.

As you stirred, the weight of the world seemed to press down harder, the thin mattress beneath you offering no relief from the crushing heaviness in your chest. For a moment, you wondered if you had even woken up at all—if this was some dream, another layer of the nightmare you’d been living for what felt like years. Your body ached in ways that had nothing to do with the physical, and when your eyes blinked open, the dim, sterile light of the room greeted you like a cold slap.

It was over.

That thought should have brought you comfort, but instead, it twisted like a knife in your gut.

The world had been saved—or at least, what was left of it. The battles had been fought, the enemies had fallen, and you had survived. You were here, alive. But the silence felt wrong, unnatural, as if the air itself was too still, too empty. There was no joy in this victory. There was no peace. Only the lingering sense of loss, of something irreplaceable that had been shattered.

You forced yourself to sit up, but every movement felt sluggish, like wading through thick mud. The room spun briefly, and for a moment, you wished you hadn’t woken at all. It was easier to stay in the dark, easier to float in the void where you didn’t have to think, didn’t have to remember.

But now, in the unforgiving light of the aftermath, the memories came flooding back, sharp and relentless.

How many lives had been lost for this so-called peace? How many faces—friends, comrades, strangers—had fallen, their blood staining the ground? And for what? What had really changed? The world might have been saved, but it was broken, fractured beyond recognition. There was no returning to what once was. The faces you had fought alongside, the ones who had smiled and laughed, were now ghosts that haunted the corners of your mind.

The weight of that realization settled over you, heavy and suffocating, pulling you down into a sea of doubt. Was any of it worth it? All the fighting, all the sacrifice—what had you really gained?

The faces of the fallen swam before your eyes, one after another. Some you had known intimately, others were mere fleeting acquaintances, but each one carried the same hollow finality. You had fought so hard, given so much, and yet, as you sat there in the cold stillness, it felt like none of it mattered. The world you had bled for had become a graveyard of lost dreams, and the future felt as distant as the stars.

The despair clawed at your throat, threatening to choke you.

Why had you fought so hard? Why had you pushed yourself beyond the breaking point? The names of the dead weighed heavily on your heart, and with each one, you wondered if there had been something more you could have done, some way to save them. But deep down, you knew the answer. You knew you had given everything, and still, it wasn’t enough. It was never enough.

Your mind spiraled, the emptiness inside you expanding, swallowing up every thought, every hope. Maybe it had all been for nothing. Maybe, in the end, the fight had taken more from you than you could ever give back. The victory felt hollow, a brittle shell masking the loss beneath.

And then there was him.

Your heart clenched painfully at the thought of Megumi. You had fought not just for yourself, not just for the world, but for him—for the people you loved, for the ones who gave you reason to keep going. But now, in this empty room, with only the echoes of your failures and fears, you weren’t sure if even that had been enough.

Was he okay? Did he make it out? The thought twisted in your mind, dark and relentless. The last you had seen of him was chaos—the blur of battle, the surge of cursed energy, his figure moving like a shadow through the carnage. You had called out his name, over and over, your voice hoarse, but he had vanished into the storm. And after that, everything had gone black.

What if…?

Your chest tightened, the panic rising like bile in your throat. What if he was gone? What if he had been one of the lives lost to the war? You couldn’t bear the thought. You didn’t know if you could survive that. You couldn’t even think about it.

But the doubt, the fear, gnawed at you like a festering wound. The room around you blurred as your vision swam with unshed tears. It felt like you were trapped beneath the weight of it all—the guilt, the grief, the unbearable thought that maybe, despite all your efforts, you had lost him too.

Your hands clenched into fists, nails biting into the soft flesh of your palms, but the physical pain was nothing compared to the storm inside you. What was the point of surviving if you had lost everything worth fighting for? What was the point of living in a world that felt so empty?

A sob built in your throat, thick and heavy, but you swallowed it down, pressing your palms against your eyes as if that could somehow stop the flood of emotion threatening to break you. You couldn’t cry. You couldn’t fall apart, not now. But the dam was crumbling, the weight of your sorrow too great to bear.

And then, through the haze of your grief, something shifted.

It was subtle at first, just a flicker in your periphery. You blinked through the tears, your breath catching as your blurred vision cleared.

And that’s when you saw him.

Megumi.

He was standing at the foot of your bed, quiet and still, his presence a solid anchor in the storm of your emotions. For a moment, you couldn’t believe it. You stared at him, wide-eyed, as if he might vanish if you looked away. His dark hair was disheveled, his face marred with cuts and bruises, but he was alive.

Alive.

Megumi was there, solid and real, as if he had emerged from the very shadows of your despair. He didn’t speak, didn’t move, but his presence alone was a lifeline—a single thread of light cutting through the oppressive darkness that had swallowed you whole.

Your breath hitched, the sobs lodged in your throat like jagged glass, tearing at you as the tears flowed freely now. You couldn’t stop them, couldn’t hold back the flood of everything you had buried deep inside. Because he was here—he was alive. After everything, after all the loss and devastation, Megumi was still standing.

A small, fragile sob escaped your lips, and with it, the last of your strength crumbled. You reached out for him, your hand trembling, desperate to close the distance between you. Megumi stood there, watching you, his dark eyes softening, though his expression remained guarded. It was as if he, too, had been waiting—waiting for the moment when your pain would overwhelm you, when you would need him more than anything.

You didn’t even realize you were moving until you were in his arms.

Your body collided with his, and the force of your relief shattered whatever fragile walls you had left. Your hands fisted in his shirt, clinging to him as if he were the only thing keeping you from drowning. In a way, he was. Megumi had become the beacon of light in a world that had gone dark. He was your anchor, the one steady point in a storm of chaos and loss, and you held onto him as if letting go would mean losing yourself entirely.

“Megumi,” you gasped, his name spilling from your lips like a confession, like a prayer. Your voice was broken, thick with tears. “I was so scared… I thought—I thought I’d lost you.”

He stiffened for a moment, caught off guard by the intensity of your desperation, but then he relaxed. His arms came around you, hesitant at first, but then more secure, wrapping you in a warmth that seemed to seep into your very soul. The hand he placed at the small of your back pressed you closer, grounding you, keeping you tethered to the present. His other hand cradled the back of your head, his touch gentle, careful, as though he were afraid you might shatter.

“I’m here,” he murmured quietly, his voice low and soothing, but beneath the calm, you could hear the echo of his own exhaustion. “I’m here.”

You shook your head against his chest, the sobs wracking your body with a force you couldn’t control. “I couldn’t… I couldn’t do it without you. I couldn’t survive this if you were gone.”

Each word was torn from you, raw and trembling, as though they had been waiting to be spoken for too long. The fear that had haunted you, the pain of almost losing him, was finally pouring out in a flood of emotion that you could no longer hold back. And Megumi—he was your constant. Your light. The only thing keeping the world from crumbling entirely around you.

His presence, solid and unmoving, was a balm to the wounds you didn’t know how to heal. The warmth of his body against yours, the steady rise and fall of his chest, the soft hum of his heartbeat—all of it was proof that he was real, that he was here, that you hadn’t lost him to the nightmare that had claimed so many others.

You buried your face in his chest, inhaling the familiar scent of him—earth and rain, something grounding, something that had always made you feel safe. His fingers curled in your hair, not with the intent to soothe you, but to remind you that he was here, that he wasn’t going anywhere. His grip was firm, as though he, too, was holding on—not just to you, but to this moment, this fragile sense of peace you had both been denied for so long.

“I thought I lost you,” you whispered again, your voice barely audible, cracking under the weight of your tears. “I thought you were gone, and I—”

“Shh,” he interrupted gently, his voice steady, though you could feel the faint tremble in his breath. He wasn’t immune to the weight of everything you had endured together, and that vulnerability made him feel all the more real. “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

You clung to him, your sobs quieting as the weight of his words settled over you. You didn’t need a grand declaration of love or an elaborate promise. This was Megumi—solid, quiet, unwavering—and that was enough. His presence was enough.

As the minutes passed, your tears began to subside, though the ache in your chest remained. But it wasn’t the same all-consuming despair that had threatened to swallow you whole. With Megumi’s arms around you, you felt grounded, tethered to something real, something you could hold onto. He was the light in the dark, and even in the midst of all your pain, that light gave you hope.

After a long moment, he gently pulled back, just enough to look at you. His fingers brushed your hair from your face, his gaze searching yours, filled with a tenderness that he rarely allowed anyone to see.

“You don’t have to carry this alone,” he said softly, his voice like a whisper in the stillness. “I’m with you.”

Your chest tightened, the tears still clinging to your lashes as you looked up at him. His face was marred by exhaustion, the remnants of battle still etched into his skin, but in that moment, he was everything. He was the proof that you hadn’t lost everything, that there was still something left to fight for, someone to hold onto.

“I was so afraid,” you whispered, your voice raw, breaking under the weight of the words. “Afraid I’d lose you... that you’d be just another name I’d have to carry.”

Your grip on his shirt tightened, your hands trembling. “You don’t know what it did to me... thinking you were gone, thinking I’d never see you again.”

Megumi’s brow furrowed, his expression flickering with something you couldn’t quite name—pain, maybe, or understanding. He stayed silent, but his arms remained firm around you, holding you close, as if he, too, needed this connection.

“I can’t lose you, Megumi,” you murmured, your voice trembling like a fragile thing. “Not you. Not after everything.”

Your words were heavy, laden with the truth you had kept buried for too long. He wasn’t just someone you fought alongside—he was the reason you fought, the light that had kept you going when everything else felt lost. And here he was, standing in front of you, pulling you from the depths when you couldn’t do it alone.

For a long moment, he just looked at you, his eyes dark and unreadable. But then, quietly, he spoke, his voice soft, almost tentative.

“I’m still here.”

The simplicity of it was almost too much to bear. Three words, and yet they held everything. He wasn’t offering you promises or reassurances he couldn’t keep, but in that moment, it was enough. It had to be.

You pressed your forehead to his chest, the tears still slipping down your cheeks, but softer now. “You’re everything,” you whispered, your voice thick with emotion. “I fought for this... for you. I don’t care if the world is broken, as long as I still have you.”

For a moment, there was only silence, your words hanging in the air, heavy with everything you had kept buried inside. Megumi’s chest rose and fell beneath your touch, his breath steady, but there was a tension there, something you hadn’t noticed before. Slowly, he pulled back, just enough to look at you, his gaze dark and conflicted.

His fingers brushed against your cheek, his touch soft, but there was something in his eyes—something raw, vulnerable, like he was standing on the edge of a precipice. He opened his mouth, hesitated, then spoke, his voice low and rough, filled with a weight you hadn’t expected.

“I almost gave up.”

The words hit you like a punch to the gut. You blinked, your breath catching as you looked at him, disbelief flooding your chest. Megumi? The thought alone felt wrong, impossible, and yet here he was, standing before you, saying the words you never thought you’d hear from him.

“I was... ready to let go,” he continued, his voice barely above a whisper, his gaze flickering to the side, as if he couldn’t bear to meet your eyes. “Sukuna was there, pulling at me, wearing me down until I thought... maybe it would be easier. Easier to give in, to just let it all end.”

You stared at him, your heart clenching painfully as the weight of his confession settled over you. He had been so close—closer than you’d ever realized—to losing himself, to disappearing into that darkness. And the thought of it, of him giving in to Sukuna, was almost too much to bear.

“But then... I thought about you.”

Your breath hitched, your eyes widening as his words sank in. Megumi’s gaze flickered back to yours, and this time, it was steady, intense, filled with an emotion so deep it threatened to unravel you.

“You kept me going,” he said, his voice stronger now, more certain. “Even when everything felt impossible, when I thought I was too far gone... I held on because of you. I couldn’t let go, not when you were still here. Not when I knew you’d be waiting.”

The air between you felt heavy, thick with the weight of his words, the truth of everything he had been carrying. And in that moment, you realized just how close you had come to losing him—not just to the war, but to the battle inside his own heart.

Tears welled in your eyes again, but this time they weren’t born of fear or pain. They were tears of relief, of understanding, of love so deep it ached. You had fought for him, but he had fought for you, too—for the chance to stay with you, to not let the darkness claim him completely.

“I couldn’t lose you,” you whispered, your voice breaking, but you didn’t care. “I couldn’t bear it.”

Megumi’s hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing away the tears as they fell, and for a moment, he simply held you there, his eyes searching yours. Then, quietly, with a tenderness that made your heartache, he said, “You’re the reason I’m still standing. You’re everything to me, too.”

[cemeteryspider]

Ballet on the Bayou Pt. 4

Alastor x Ballerina! Reader

Summary: Who lives, who dies, who tells your story ig...

Trigger Warnings: Violence, grief, mourning, death, and drug use

Word Count: 1156

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Ballet on the Bayou Masterlist

"Blah, blah, blah, blah. This is boring stuff. I thought you would have done something interesting by now" Angel practically yelled at the pair.

"I am getting there, Angel Dust, context is important" Alastor said to get Angel to stop talking.

"Yes, Angel the good part is coming, I promise dear" Your finger brushed up against Angel Dust's cheek to get him to look at Alastor again.

"Fine but this better be worth it toots" Alastor's eye twitched and his smile lessened just a little, but the little laugh you let out was enough to make him calm down again.

"Now where was I? Yes!"

~~~

You had recently gotten the plaster off of your foot and you were on a long road to recovery. Your dream had not fully died yet, and you thought of other ways you could reenter the dance world. You could be a choreographer, direct a ballet, or be a stage manager. None of these options felt right for you, so you kept looking.

You often walked with Alastor to his job and went to some stores. Then you would go home to be with his mother for the day. Cook, clean, listen to music, whatever she wanted to do. Then you would go meet Alastor outside the radio station, and walk home together.

Somedays this was just too much to bear, and you would end up in bed with as many pillows stacked under your foot as you could have. Those days Alastor worried, but as time wore on those days were few and far between.

As a few months passed since your injury you thought more about getting a job. Even just a couple days of the week out of the house would do you good. Talking to other people and making friends was something you longed for since you left home.

So you spoke to Alastor about getting a job.

"Why, Cher, I make enough money to support us. Stay home be comfortable"

"Al, I want to dance again, maybe not like I was, but I think I want to teach" Your eyes softened as you looked at him. This was not a spur of the moment decision. When he looked into your eyes, he knew you had been thinking about this for a while.

"Do not push yourself too hard, Cher, I couldn't bear to see you get hurt again" He pulled you close and rested his chin on your head.

The next day you went to the nearest dance studio and asked if they would let you teach a class.

~~~

Soon enough you were teaching children how to dance. It gave you hope for the future, however, after one long day at the studio you came into an empty house. No smell of dinner, and Alastor on the couch with his head in his hands.

As you got closer you could hear the silent sobs coming from him.

"She's gone, mon cherie, she's gone"

He never gave you the full details but you knew for the past few weeks she had been extremely ill. Everyday you left for work, you would ask her if she needed you to stay. She always smiled and told you to go.

The next few months were ones of extreme mourning. Alastor dragged himself out of bed for work, used all his energy there, and then came home to collapse in bed.

Although you might say that you weren't helpful, Alastor called you the light in his darkest days.That the one good thing that happened in his life, saved him. You saved him.

Unfortunately, the killing that had miraculously stopped a year prior had mysteriously started again. This put you on edge, but as more time went on and more people went missing, Alastor got better. Although to you it was coincidence it was in fact correlation.

~~~

"Wait, how did you not know he was a murderer?" Angel Dust interrupted Alastor once more, and Alastors antlers grew longer for a moment then retracted when he looked at your patient face.

"I only saw what I wanted to see, Angel, to me he was perfect in every way. He still is despite, you know, everything"

"I still don't understand why you're here though? I mean you taught kids to dance, here that makes you practically a saint" Again a small laugh emanated for your lips.

"That's coming, Angel, just listen"

~~~

One day Alastor was waiting for you to come home. He was going to surprise you by going to the new upscale fancy restaurant in town. However, just before he went out to look for you, a police-man knocked on the door.

On your way home a car had struck you. Either you hadn't seen it or you froze, but the car had hit you and you died on impact. Alastor didn't quite believe what he was hearing and collapsed.

~~~

However, you were greeted at the pearly gates. That's where you waited for your love to come and find you. When you looked in the mirror you saw your Odette costume. A beautiful tutu and white pointe shoes. Not only that but a gorgeous pair of white wings had sprouted from your back. Once this would have made your heart swell with happiness. However, you couldn’t enjoy it without Alastor by your side. 

After many years you were finally informed of his whereabouts.

He went a little crazy after you died. He killed more and more. He made more mistakes and got even sloppier. Until the fateful day of his death. He died a couple of years after you. Bullet to the head from a hunter that mistook him for a deer.

The day of his death, he was put in Hell. No second thoughts about it. He had killed many, and would kill many more to gain power in Hell. Somehow when he arrived he could feel you weren't there. He knew deep down you didn't deserve to be there rotting in Hell with him.

You argued with the angel council.

"It must be a mistake. He had only ever been good to me, and to his mother. Please, why is he down there"

They had told me what he'd done. What he'd done before he met you, while he knew you, after you had died, and how he had died. In that moment, you forgave him. Not a moment of doubt crossed your mind.

The council was horrified. You were put on trial. They even waited. Try to see if you would change your mind. Come to your senses. See the light again.

You were cast out. You were no longer naive. You were no longer innocent. You were fully aware the man you loved was a monster. Yet you wanted to be with him anyway.

Casting you out was a curse, the worst form of punishment.

To you, it was a miracle. You would get to see him again. 

[celaenaeiln]

been listening to a good amount of hozier lately and i’m just fixated on these lines from “Almost (Sweet Music)”

I'm almost me again. She's almost you

AND

I got some colour back, she thinks so, too

I laugh like me again, she laughs like you

and i can’t help but associate it with robin!dick and batman. what do you think. i can’t stop thinking.

oh my god.

THIS IS SO GOOD!!!!!

Also this part! -

"I came in from the outside Burned out from a joy ride She likes to roll here in my Ashes anyway"

This is literally Batman!! Coming back from breaking down after 3 years of fighting crime only to come face to face with Dick Grayson who grins brightly at him, tells him everything is okay, and cheers him up as if he wasn't covered in the blood of his enemies and hatred of himself. Bruce could be in the worst state ever and Dick would still love him for who he is because Dick's love for him is unconditional.

"I wouldn't know where to start Sweet music playing in the dark Be still, my foolish heart Don't ruin this on me"

Bruce fighting with himself that this isn't just a passing thing but he can't resist the happiness but he's also scared and loves Dick. It's about him opening up his windows and slowly breaking down his defenses in the face of Dick's continued persistence and pure positivity and warmth.

"Let's get lost and let the good times roll Let smoke rings from this paper doll Blow sweet and thick 'til every thought of it Don't mean a thing"

THIS IS CLASSIC GOLDEN AGE BRUCE AND DICK. During Golden Age, Bruce and Robin Dick literally were just living life for the thrill of it. They fought dinosaurs, met Leonardo Divinci, gasped at famous actresses, played pirates with Blackbeard - it was The Golden Age. The first line of the stanza is a callback to that. Of Bruce simply enjoying himself. Out with the bad, in with the good was their motto. Even the second line - "Let smoke rings from this paper doll" - could be Bruce reminscing about that time because bruce used to smoke cigars. Which he contemplates those times about through "Blow sweet and thick 'til every thought of it". It's all enjoyment - none of the bad that happened means anything. All forgotten.

"The very thought of you, and am I blue? A love supreme, seems far removed I get along without you very well Some other nights

Lord, the radio newsreader chimes Reporting Russian lullabies She'll turn to me, awake and ask "Is everything alright?" And, Lord"

"She'll turn to me, awake and ask 'Is everything alright?'" THIS IS CANON. IM SOBBING WHY DOES THIS FIT SO WELL. NOT TO MENTION THAT DICK ALSO DOES SPEAK RUSSIAN SO THEM LISTENING TO RUSSIAN LULLABIES IN THE 1950S ON RADIOS WHILE THEY READ THE NEWSPAPER?!! THIS IS!!

Batman (1940) Issue #1

IS THIS NOT WHAT THIS SONG IS ABOUT?!