#like no it is your job to avoid content you dont like

[gojosconsort]

Hey could I make a request please :3 Professor gojo with student reader, lots of tension, shes in his chemistry class and he takes a very obvious but weird liking to her, like always makes HER do favours for him, always picks on HER during class. Eventually and somehow they end up together but they have to keep it a secret so gojo doesnt get fired but he is TERRIBLE at trying to hide it and his coworkers (nanami, geto, etc) are getting suspiscious, readers friends are getting suspiscious because of how gojo acts around her. I was thinking they get caught and some angst and having to breakup and then theres a LOT of tension after that and class is SO awkward ... sorry if thats too much and if u dont write for that type of thing. oh and also reader is very introverted and keeps to herself but clever :)

PROFESSOR’S PET ♡ // HEADCANONS

⁀➷ CONTENT. you’re the quiet, clever girl in gojo’s chemistry class, and he’s the hotshot professor who’s taken a strange, obvious liking to you—picking on you, favoring you, until tension snaps.

♡ PAIRING. afab!reader x professor!gojo

♡ WARNINGS. mdni. age gap (gojo in his 30s, reader in her 20s), teacher-student relationship, oral sex (m & f receiving), creampie, risk of getting caught (and then getting caught oops), this is very chaotic sorry lmaoo

♡ AUTHOR’S NOTE. ty for the request, i shortened it a bit bc it got a bit long but hope you like it <3

PROFESSOR!GOJO who’s the star of the chemistry department—tall, white-haired, too damn handsome for a lab coat, and always smirking. you’re the introverted student in the back row, nose in your notes, acing every test but barely speaking. he notices you day one—calls you out mid-lecture, “hey, quiet girl—yeah, you—explain covalent bonds.” you stammer it out perfectly, and he grins, “smart one, huh? good.” from then on, you’re his favorite student <3

PROFESSOR!GOJO who starts singling you out for everything—makes you stay late to “organize his lab notes,” smirking, “you’re clever, figure it out,” even though they’re a mess. always picks you to demo experiments, hovering too close, “don’t blow us up, sweetheart.” classmates snicker, but you’re too shy to call him out, but also too sharp to mess up his tasks. he loves it, leaning in once, “you blush easy—cute.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who ramps up the teasing—drops your name in every lecture, “let’s see if our genius in the back can solve this,” grinning when you nail it. starts lingering after class, asking random shit—“you like chemistry or just pretending?” you mutter short answers, avoiding his piercing eyes, but he’s relentless, brushing your arm “accidentally” while passing papers, whispering, “stay sharp, i’m watching.” your heart’s a mess, and he knows it.

PROFESSOR!GOJO who catches you alone in the lab one evening—you’re finishing his latest “favor,” and he locks the door, smirking, “you’re too good at this—makes me wanna keep you.” you freeze, but he’s on you, voice low, “tell me to stop, sweetheart.” you don’t—can’t, because you want it too—and he’s kissing you hard, hands under your shirt, growling, “fuck, been waiting for this.” lifts you onto the lab table, fucks you right there, rough and fast, “quiet now—don’t want security hearing.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who’s smug as hell after—adjusts his glasses, “our little secret, yeah? can’t lose my job over this.” you agree, shaky but hooked—he’s too good, too dangerous. he’s careful at first—texts you coded shit like “lab needs organizing tonight,” meaning meet him after hours. but he’s reckless in class, winking at you, calling you “my star student” with a grin that’s way too obvious.

PROFESSOR!GOJO who’s terrible at hiding it—nanami catches him staring at you during a staff meeting, frowning, “focus, gojo—stop drooling over students.” geto’s sharper, smirking, “she’s in your class, right? awfully quiet for your type.” your friends notice too—whispering, “why’s gojo always on you? it’s weird.” you shrug it off, blushing, but they’re not dumb—his favoritism’s screaming something’s up.

PROFESSOR!GOJO who drags you into his office between classes—locks it, pulls you down, “need a quick taste, sweetheart.” goes down on you under his desk, tongue relentless, muttering, “fuck, you’re so sweet—my clever girl.” you’re biting your lip to stay quiet when someone knocks—nanami’s voice, “gojo, you in there?” he doesn’t stop, grinning up at you, “answer him, babe—keep it steady.” you barely choke out a “he’s busy!” while cumming.

PROFESSOR!GOJO who laughs it off after nanami leaves—“close one, huh? gotta be sneakier.” starts making excuses—tells colleagues you’re his “research assistant” now, smirking when you glare. your friends grill you—“research? you? with him?” you’re too introverted to lie well, stammering, “it’s just work!” but they’re skeptical, and geto’s watching gojo like a hawk, muttering, “he’s slipping—idiot’s gonna get caught.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who can’t keep his hands off—corners you in an empty lecture hall, bending you over the podium, “fuck, you in that skirt—driving me insane.” fucks you deep, praising, “smartest pussy i’ve ever had—mine, yeah?” leaves a hickey on your neck, grinning, “oops—cover that up, sweetheart.” you’re pissed—he’s too careless—but he just kisses it, “looks good on you.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who’s got everyone talking now—students whisper, “she’s always with him—think they’re banging?” your friends pull you aside, “girl, he’s way too into you—what’s the deal?” you deny it, voice small, but gojo makes it worse—leans too close during office hours, loud enough for geto to overhear, “missed you last night, star student.” geto’s eyebrow lifts, “careful, gojo—walls have ears.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who texts you at midnight—“lab. now.” meets you there, all grins, “couldn’t sleep—need my fix.” fucks you on the lab bench again, slow this time, “fuckin’ perfect—my little genius.” leaves the lights on—too cocky to care—muttering, “let ‘em catch us, babe—worth it.” you’re a wreck, loving it but terrified of getting caught, and he just smirks, “relax, i’d fight for this.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who gets cornered by nanami and geto some day—nanami’s blunt, “you’re screwing a student, aren’t you? this’ll destroy your career.” geto’s smirking, “she’s cute, i get it—but you’re dumb as hell at hiding it.” gojo shrugs, “prove it—nothing’s happening.” they don’t buy it—your friends ask again, “seriously, what’s with you and gojo?”—and you’re running out of excuses.

PROFESSOR!GOJO who shows up at your apartment unannounced—knocks hard, grinning, “heard you were stressed, sweetheart—gonna fix that.” pushes inside, locks the door, and has you against the wall in seconds, “fuck, you’re too good—my clever little thing.” eats you out on your couch, then fucks you deep on your bed, groaning, “this pussy’s mine—gonna spoil you rotten.” leaves you limp, kissing your forehead, “better now, yeah?”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who still can’t resist you at school—pulls you into a storage closet near the chem lab between lectures, “need you now, babe—fuck the risk.” hikes your skirt up, fucks you against the shelves, growling, “so damn tight—my perfect girl.” you’re moaning soft, trying to stay quiet, when the door cracks open—geto’s voice, dry, “knew it—fucking sloppy, gojo.” gojo doesn’t stop, grinning, “enjoy the show, asshole,” finishing hard while you’re embarrassed as hell, geto shutting the door with a dark chuckle.

PROFESSOR!GOJO who’s unfazed by geto catching you—grins, “he won’t snitch—likes watching too much.” but geto’s accidentally spills it to nanami and your friends connect dots too, “wait, someone saw you? oh my god, it’s true!” nanami’s digging deeper, “’ll report this, satoru—it’s over if i confirm it.” gojo pulls you aside, smirking, “don’t stress, sweetheart—i’ll bullshit my way out. nobody’s breaking us up.”

PROFESSOR!GOJO who’s still playing with fire—kisses you in the hall, “fuck ‘em, let ‘em talk.” nanami’s got evidence—texts he found. your friends won’t drop it, “you’re insane—he’s gonna get fired!” geto’s smirking, “told you, satoru—game’s up.” gojo just leans back, glasses slipping, and shrugs, “well, shit—guess we’re caught now.” but the question is—what are you you gonna do now??

————— ୨୧ —————

⁀➷ masterlist

[mi-co-uk]

RAT ☣︎

─── patient reader doesn't know who she is, where she is or how she got there. she's monitored 24/7 by scientist matt who knows much more than he'll tell her. how dedicated can matt stay to his cause when he falls in love with her?

("confidential" dividers by @bernardsbendystraws)

PREVIOUS // AU NAV // NAVIGATION // ALL AUS

CONTENT: patient reader has lots of questions for scientist matt. matt doesn't want to upset you but he has a job to do. for the first time ever, you are very talkative and emotive - but now matt feels guilty.

WARNINGS: implications of being experimented on, withholding information, reader gets stressed out, handcuffs and guards, a little arguing.

CHAPTER ONE

wc: 1k

“Is perfect a healthy memory or a lack of one?”

“what are you testing for?” you persisted. 

He gathered back up his papers, dropping them down on the surface to straighten them out. 

“That is your question to answer.” he was being dismissive, not wanting to sway you towards one answer more than another. 

Maybe it was your question. What were you even here for? Maybe the test is to see what you think is happening. 

“whats my name?” you wanted to know what you could, trying to start off with the easier questions. 

“Your patient code is zero zero four, version-”

“My name. Not my code”

He thought of you as stubborn. This version of you was much more curious yet a lot less knowledgeable. Various commands were muttering through his ear piece, alternative phrases of how to further avoid the question. 

“Like freya, daisy, mia. Real names."

“What made you list those names?” 

“Is one of them my name?”

“That is your qu-” “my question to answer, i know.”

He cleared his throat. You had never been this verbal before. You werent afraid like you used to be, and he didnt know how to handle it. There was a new glint in your eye, a sense of hatred. It wasnt directed at him necessarily, maybe it was the machine recording your conversation that you hated. Maybe it was the security cameras or maybe it was the note paper. You were convinced your name was written down somewhere. it would be easier to try and steal the paper than it would be to pull it out of your subconscious. 

“what about you?” you inquired. 

“Im assuming you dont mean my doctor code.”

“You know what im asking.”

He smirked at the passive aggression. This was also new. “If i tell you my name can you tell me yours?”

“But i dont know my name.”

“Lie.”

The machine’s whirring was a little louder. Maybe from the lack of talking that you had noticed but it really felt different. You strained yourself to not look towards it, to not investigate. The session would end if you did and you had plenty more questions to ask. 

“I can choose my name?”

“You can choose what i call you.”

“Are you going to tell me your real name?”

“If you like.”

The atmosphere had changed. You felt as if you were going to gain an advantage - which was a tell tale sign that you didnt actually have one. You were missing something, but you were more curious of the information you were going to gain to get a proper read on the situation. You stared in a request for him to do so, he gave you a small smile and a quick sigh. 

“Matt.”

“Matt?”

“Yes.”

It felt harmless. You could tell he was somewhat embarrassed, a pinkish tint in his cheeks that wasnt there before. He just hadnt expected to like hearing you say his name as much as he did. 

“And your name?” he questioned, making the deal you had even. 

“Can you choose?” he shook his head in response. “But i want you to.”

“I cant do that.”

“Well why not?”

“Its for you to tell me.”

He saw a glint of anger in your eyes, maybe it was just vague irritation and he was reading too far into it. 

“Im your lab rat but you wont give me a name.” or maybe he wasnt. 

He wasnt supposed to upset you. He had rules to limit the information you had or received which unfortunately came before your happiness. The last thing he wanted was for you to hate him, but he had a role to fufill. 

“I dont know which would be worse, if you called me a rat or a bunch of meaningless numbers.” 

The resentment was building up. It was overwhelming even for you, the quick snaps between emotions but the consistent confusion, the consistent lack of information you had.

“What would you like me to call you?” he interrupted your spiralling train of thoughts. 

“My name.”

He smiled in answer, fueling your upset further. It was a single piece of information and he couldnt even give you that. Did he enjoy your confusion that much?

“Id have to discuss it.”

The tension faded out, relaxing the furrowing of your eyebrows from a small sense of hope. He saw your change in emotion, boosting his own enjoyment in the process.

That was until he heard the static of the machine. The light was flickering unevenly, clearly no longer fulfilling its role. He hadnt noticed it at all. He looked towards you to see a hint of uneasiness, you knew the session was going to have to end before matt had even processed it himself. A frown formed on his face.

“Session end time at eighteen hours-”

“Stop!” you interrupted.

“I have to end the session for today.”

“That not fair, im not done! I dont know anything still!”

“You know my name”

“Thats not enough, i have more questions!”

He arose from his seat, you wanted to mimic his action until you felt the tug of handcuffs attached to your wrists. You hadnt even noticed that you were tied to the metal bars poking out from the middle of the table. Your emotions once again were rapidly switching. 

“Session end time at eighteen hours and twenty six minutes. Abrupt ending due to technical malfunction.” 

He made a note of it and so did the team of people listening in from the viewing window, the one you didnt know was there. He gathered all belongings and tucked his chair in. the guards stormed into the room abruptly, heading directly towards you to remove handcuffs and pull you out of the room so that matt could follow along after you. He felt more guilty for it than he usually did. You typically didnt convey fear or anger, now you showed every emotion possible. You even wanted to keep talking, so did matt. 

The last thing you remembered of that day was calling out his name as you were dragged out, his emotionless demeanor faltering as a guilty frown settled on his face. 

NEXT ->

a/n imo I think this is kinda super cool , excited to start writing part two if you want want it c:

tags:

everything taglist: @pair-of-pantaloons @oopsiedaisydeer @corspebridedelrey @browniepop62 @izzylovesmatt @michele-sturns @courta13 @sturns-mermaid @emely9274 @baebadoobee4ever @fw-lee @afr8idofrats @stvrniolotrxpl3ts @chrxsprettygirl @franticroads @m4gz-png @clairomatt @allisonclairee @mattshorsenecklace @whor3ing @matts-girlfriend @obsessedwiththesturniolos @shadowthesim237 @chrisslut04 @jetaimevous @eeyoresturnz @dolliraez @sugarraez @pizzapocketpocketpizza @k1ssettae @pink1man @bbgirlmatt @fadedstvrn @sturnslutz @ribbonlovergirl @msvalsius @mattsfavoriteteddybear @sturnberries @jacsismattswife @tezzzzzzzz @matts-hersheys-kisses + all matt only taglist : @pinkmattrr @apersononearth011 + angst and fluff only taglist : @xeneasworld @auttysturnz @kayskreativeideas @franticroads

[djarinova]

"careful there, stranger"

ft. rafayel (lads)

˗ˏˋ synopsis; in which rafayel is stuck talking to some investors, leaving you to explore the exhibition on your own, much to the glee of the man trying to chat you up while you look at all the art your boyfriend created. ˎˊ˗

˗ˏˋ content; reader gets hit on repeatedly, rafayel comes to the rescue, insecure rafayel, gn!reader - divider by @/saradika-graphics ˎˊ˗

[ wc; 1371 ]

my fishie<3: i can see u from here. looking sexy and staring at my art my fishie<3: u've seen it all before. why won't u come rescue meee instead :(((( me: baby stop looking at me and focus on your networking! im not going anywhere but those suits might if you dont pay them enough attention my fishie<3: >:( my fishie<3: ok smartie. dont forget about me during your exploration >:(

You roll at your eyes and drop your phone into your bag, a shiver flutters up your spine and you sneak at glance towards Rafayel. Your suspicions are proved to be correct, he's watching you, a pout on his face, as several men in suits attempt to flatter him into some partnership or sponsorship or something of that kind. Thomas stands by his side, enthusiastically waving his hands around and pointing towards the piece of art the group of them are currently standing next to. You giggle when you lock eyes with Rafayel and find him sticking his tongue out at you, and you watch as Thomas lands a discreet (but direct) hit on his foot in an effort to get the artist to concentrate.

You turn away from the scene—not wanting to be in trouble with thomas, and not wanting to make his job of marketing rafayel to those people any harder—fully expecting to be able to continue your wander around the exhibition, maybe have a couple friendly conversations with those few people you recognise, and definitely intending to snag a few bits from the table of snacks (rafayel would kill you if he wasn't able to try at least 7 of the different foods), but as you attempt to take a step forward you stumble clumsily into someone’s side. Although you're sure they weren't there a second ago.

"I'm so sorry!" You exclaim, "are you alright?"

The stranger ignores your worries, “you have such an infectious laugh.”

You smile, slightly awkwardly, but accept the compliment nonetheless. “Thank yo–”

“It makes me think about all the things I could do to make you laugh like that.” He chuckles, an attempt to lighten the mood, but he finds you almost completely unreceptive to his words.

So he tries again.

“Your smile is so stunning,” he takes a step towards you, forcing you to discreetly take one backwards to avoid standing chest to chest with him. “I've never seen you here before, you a fan of art?”

You press your lips together. He's never seen you here before? At an art gallery that you visit almost every week to look at your boyfriend's work? That's the best he could come up with… the thought almost makes you laugh. But when your gaze moves towards him he must take your eye contact as a positive sign because he takes another small step towards you and asks for your phone number.

“C'mon, you won't leave me hanging, surely?” He teases, but his smile doesn't quite reach his eyes. “A pretty thing like you, wandering around all alone, it ain't right. Let me show you some of my favourite pieces.”

“Oh! I'm not alone actually, my boyfr–”

“We should move out of this section though, I've never found Rafayel's art to be all that interesting. He is way overhyped, I mean… what is this even meant to be?” He gestures to the piece you're standing in front of.

Ignoring the man's words, you turn away from him and look at the art, hoping he'll finally take the hint and realise that you are not interested.

“I've always loved this one.” You whisper, more talking to yourself than anything else. You hear the man scoff next to you.

“Oh really? And how exactly have you always loved this one when it's a brand new piece for this installation?” He rolls his eyes at you, “clearly I overestimated your ability to distinguish between artwork.”

You raise your eyebrows, your jaw dropping ever so slightly when the man continues his ridiculous rant despite a single word not leaving your mouth.

“I mean, really, did you expect me to fall for this pretentious attitude you've got going on. Wandering around by yourself isn't exactly attractive, you know.”

You're the one hounding me and I'm the one with a pretentious attitude? This guy is ridiculous. You think to yourself.

“And then pretending to love a piece that has only been available for public viewing since about 3 hours ago? You really are trying too hard, next ti–”

“Careful there, stranger.” A familiar voice interrupts, “you wouldn't want to disturb your fellow fans of art by making a big scene, would you?”

You smile when you feel Rafayel's warmth against your back, the ring you got him sits comfortably, and familiarly, against your skin as he places his hand on your arm.

A scowl crosses the man's face. “Who do you think you are? You cocky little…”

It takes a few seconds for the stranger to realise why he knows the man who so casually rests his hand on you, but when it dawns on him and the recognition crosses his features it takes all your strength not to start grinning at his reaction. He stumbles backwards, bowing his head and muttering half hearted apologies, and you watch as he turns abruptly and practically runs out of the entryway.

Rafayel’s laughter fills your ears, his hands slide down to your waist and when he spins you towards him you can't help but follow his lead and let out a small laugh as well. The urge to pull him against you almost overwhelms you, his cheeks are slightly flushed and his lips look unbelievably soft in this light, but when you remember where you are—a work event, with plenty of important opportunities for Rafayel—you manage to refrain.

“Wait!” You whip your head around, “shouldn't you be with Thomas still? Please tell me you didn't blow off those possible investors…”

Rafayel's cheeks redden ever so slightly, the light dusting making him even more irresistible.

“What did you expect me to do, angel? Leave you to the wolves?” His fingers twiddle with the cardigan in your hands, “besides, Thomas can do perfectly well without me.”

The two of you turn your heads towards Thomas. The men are all heavily engaged in conversation, although now they are closer to the painting on the right and seem to be discussing it in intense detail.

“So… tell me more about how you've always loved this one, I'm dying to hear about it.”

A flush creeps onto your cheeks and you smack Rafayel's arm lightly, “I can't believe you were listening to that. I'm never coming with you to an opening ever again.”

Your threat is empty, Rafayel knows this. So when you attempt to escape from his grasp he's quick to chase after you and pull you tightly against his chest.

“You would never be so mean.” He whispers, his breath tickles your neck and you feel a shiver sweep over your body.

You feel people's eyes on you but you try to pay it no mind, it is Rafayel's exhibition after all.

“You're ridiculous,” you tease.

His arms squeeze you once more before loosening ever so slightly, just loose enough for you to turn around in his grip. His eyes are waiting for you, warm and soft and familiar, and when you slide your arms around his waist—he is somehow now the one holding onto your cardigan—he smiles a knowing smile and you feel your cheeks warm again.

“Maybe… but you love me anyway.” His words are light, but you recognise that uncertainty in his voice.

“Yes, I do. I love you very much, Rafayel.”

He smiles, a wide, vulnerable type of smile and as you press a light kiss to his cheek you hear the unmistakable voice of Thomas getting closer and closer. Rafayel's smiles turns into a frown rather suddenly and when he links his hand in yours you look over at him with a questioning gaze.

“You're coming with me this time, cutie.”

And so you let him lead you towards Thomas and his potential investors, happy to be thrown into the deep end, as long as you're by his side.

[chaoticcupcakeee]

Chapter Two: The Ticket and Your Shitty Car

***THERE WILL BE LOTS SMUT 18+ CONTENT EVENTUALLY SO MINORS THIS IS NOT A SPACE FOR YOU, MINORS WILL BE BLOCKED,IF YOU DONT HAVE AN AGE IN YOUR BIO I WILL LIKELY ASSUME YOU'RE A MINOR AND BLOCK. DM/ASK FOR ANY QUESTIONS THANKS!<3***

Pairing: Professor! Steve Harrington x Best Friends Dad! Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Lots of angst (sorry folks), mentions of anxiety and bullying, cigarette smoking, Eddie and Steve being sexy, kissing 👀, Reader is in their mid 20s and Steve and Eddie are in their early to mid 40s. Lemme know if i've missed anything.

Summary: After a few weeks of getting closer to Eddie and Steve feelings bubble to the surface

Authors Note: I'm so excited for this chapter and the rest of the series i've been having so much fun writing this! I've never written angst before so i'm interested in the response it'll get! And I pinky promise ya'll are getting smut in the next chapter 😈 7k words

**Chapter One Chapter Three Chapter Four Chapter Five**

(banners and headers by @cafekitsune)

A couple days had gone by since your first interactions with the two men that have been plaguing both your waking thoughts and your dreams. You’ve woken up more than once this week from your body buzzing and your panties soaked through. Lips on skin, rough hands on your hips, deep voices whispering in your ear. Groaning yourself fully awake and grabbing your vibrator to finish the job, that isn’t nearly as good as whatever was happening in your dreams.

Because of these dreams it made it impossible to look at Steve during class, only looking when you absolutely had to. Avoiding Mr. Munson was a bit easier, he either wasn’t home much when you were with Violet, or he was in the garage. You convinced yourself that you would just eventually get over your little crushes, and if you just avoided them long enough then things would go back to normal, and you’d have your sanity back.

But things didn’t quite work out that way. After you had gotten your ticket on the first day, you decided you would just pay it off yourself, to avoid another possibly embarrassing interaction with Steve. You had your parking pass now so you wouldn’t get another ticket. But you had a busy week with assignments and kept forgetting to take care of it. By the end of the week, you had completely forgotten about it, until Fridays sociology class. It was a normal class; Steve was talking about the theoretical approach to sociology. At the end of class, you were supposed to hand in your paper on Social Darwinism, you had spent many late nights making sure that this paper specifically was perfect. The problem was that when you were meant to hand it in at the end of class, you couldn’t find it, and you were starting to panic. Almost all the other students had left or were in the process of handing in their papers and you were left anxiously digging through your bookbag.

“Oh, how the tables turn, need some help there?”

You freeze, looking up from the familiar black converse that you could see next to your bookbag. Your anxious eyes are met with playful honey brown ones, that make you relax slightly.

“Sorry no I’m good I know it’s in here somewhere,” you reply a little anxious. You didn’t want your professor to think that this was any reflection of you as a student or your work ethic.

Steve watches you dig through your bag for another few seconds when you finally find it, in a folder you don’t remember putting it in. When you get the folder out of your bookbag, the ticket sitting at the bottom of your bag falls out onto the floor right at Steves feet. You’re too busy to notice, trying to make sure all of the pages of your paper are in order, and you have all your sources. When you finally look up from the papers in front of you, you see Steve holding the ticket that you got on the first day of school.

You panic and look up and into his eyes, he doesn’t look mad, but he looks confused. “I thought I told you I’d fix this for you if you ever got a ticket. Why didn’t you tell me?” he said.

“I- I didn’t want to bother with you something so silly, I was going to pay it, but with a bunch of papers due, I just forgot I’m sorry,” you blurt out.

Steve raises his hand to silence your apologies casually, and you’re ready for him to yell at you or at the very least be disappointed in you.

Shit, why did you not just pay it the day you got it?

“It’s not your fault honey, there’s no need for you to apologize, okay?” he says warmly. Your shoulders relax a bit more, his voice giving you reassurance.

“I swear I really did mean to pay it, I just didn’t want to bother you,” you confess.

Steves eyes soften. “Y/N you are never a bother, plus it's my fault for being the worst teacher in history and not giving you a parking pass.” He jokes.

“Steve you’re one of my favorite teachers, nowhere near my list of worst teachers.” You reveal.

He smiles widely and raises his eyebrow; you swear you can feel your insides thaw. With the playful look on his face, he almost seems younger, you could only imagine how attractive he was when he was younger, even just a glimpse is enough to make your stomach do flips.

“Oh so there IS list? Well, I demand to know where I am on your favorite teachers list, maybe it’ll give me motivation to try harder in class.” He winks at you in retort. You swear you could cum in your pants right now, how dare he be so beautiful and perfect, and funny.

You think hard for a second, you can’t put him first you think his ego probably couldn’t handle it, also it would just bring you more embarrassment. But he very easily is your favorite teacher, he makes jokes during class, makes sure his lectures are easy to understand and enjoyable, and seems to genuinely care about all his students, it’s very hard to rank any teacher above him.

“I hope your ego can handle it Steve, but you’re second.” you gush.

“You wound me, SECOND? That’s basically failure I demand to know who could possibly rank higher than me?” he jokingly stands up straighter, adjusts his tie, and holds his hand to his heart.

Damn, you hadn’t thought that far ahead.

“Uh, Professor Buckley, my Gender Studies Professor, I love her class,” you confess.

Steves eyes couldn’t roll farther back into his head even if he tried, you almost worried that they’d get stuck.

“You’re telling me, my best friend has already won you over? I’ve sat in on some of her classes and there is no way that Robin is funnier than I am!” he exclaimed as he puts his hands on his hips.

“You know Professor Buckley.. er Robin? Also, you definitely top her in the funny department, how did I know you wouldn’t be satisfied with second.” you retort easily. You could get used to this, the casual flirting, smiling with your professor, it felt easier than breathing. Once you got over the fact that he was one of the most handsome men that you’ve ever seen in your whole life.

“Know her? She’s been my best friend since high school, and a major pain in my ass. Second place is basically losing, everyone knows that babe.” The pet name slipped off his tongue so effortlessly.

Your eyes must have gone wide because Steve looks slightly embarrassed and rubs the back of his neck.

Babe babe babe babe babe babe babe HE CALLED YOU BABE

“Well then I guess you gotta step it up Professor.” you reply, trying to ease the tension in the room.

He smiles at you gratefully, “yeah I guess so,” he chuckles.

“Anyways I don’t want to keep you again for the second time this week, I’ll see you in class on Monday Steve.” you say as you go to stand up and walk past him. You’re about halfway to the door before you hear him call out.

“Hey, wait up, uh why don’t you come with me to my office so I can get that parking ticket taken care of for you,” he explains.

“You sure? I don’t want to make you late for your next class.”

“I’m the one who got you into this mess, please let me help you fix it?” he asks gently.

“Lead the way professor,”you answer playfully.

He smiles that flashy Steve Harrington smile and shows you the way towards his office.

“It’s just down this hallway,” he shares.

Then you feel him put his hand at the small of your back guiding you into a room on the righthand side, his touch lights your body on fire. It takes everything in you not to lean into his touch. You can smell his cologne, now that you’re so close to him. It’s a fairly clean scent with hints of musk and spice at the end, a more modern scent then you expected from a man his age. It only makes you want him more, to lean in closer and smell his scent mixed with the cologne.

You’re snapped out of your daze when Steve picks up the phone receiver and punches in a phone number. His fingers almost covered the buttons on the phone, and it made your legs squeeze together, thinking back to the multiple dreams you had about those specific fingers all over you. Steve looks up at you smiling lightly, surely just trying to fill the silence that filled the room. You hoped he hadn’t magically learned how to read minds in the short walk from his classroom to his office or you’d be toast.

His office wasn’t anything glamorous, it was an average size, with a nice desk and comfy looking chair, and big window with a view that overlooked the campus. The only thing making it uniquely his are the loads of pictures of him and Professor Buckley, and a few other guys and girls that looked around his age or maybe a bit younger. Documenting various birthdays, weddings, and get togethers.

While Steve is on the phone you take a moment to look at them, you see a picture of Steve being Professor Buckleys best man in her wedding to a pretty woman with dark brown hair and blue eyes. They all looked so happy, it made you smile, it looked like a really special day. Also noting that there are no wedding photos of him or pictures of him with a girlfriend, making your heart internally soar.

When you finally tear your eyes away from the photos, you hear the end of a conversation Steve is having with someone on the phone.

“Thanks again Reg, I promise it won’t happen again. Yeah, you too, take care. Say hi to the wife and kids for me," he said.

He puts down the receiver and looks at where you’re standing, and gestures to the photo you’re looking at.

“Yeah, Robins wedding! It was a really great day,” he reminisces. He goes onto explain that Robin ended up marrying his ex from High School, Nancy Wheeler. You smile and nod along to the anecdotes he talks about that day, trying to absorb everything he tells you about his life like a sponge.

“And by the end of the night Lucas and Max lead everyone in a impromptu sing-a-long to Never Ending Story, It was hilarious,” He says. You could combust, you can see just how clearly he loves his friends and how much they mean to him. He shakes his head and smiles wide at the memory, his smile being infectious, you smile back at him.

“Sounds like really good time Steve,” you reply.

“Yeah, it was, it really was.” he shares, he seems a little lost in thought for a moment before smiling up at you. “Sorry I don’t mean to bore you with my stories of the old days, I don’t get to gush about the people I love very often, so its nice to have someone listen," He confessed.

Your heart melts, he’s such a sweetheart. “No no please, I enjoy hearing them, makes you more a person than just my teacher. Plus, maybe at some point you’ll slip up and tell me something embarrassing about yourself. Then you’re done for Harrington,” you jab.

     He raises his eyebrows at you and looks impressed. “That’ll never happen, I’ve never done anything embarrassing in my life ever,” he states sarcastically.

     “Well, I’ll just have to ask Professor Buckley, my favorite teacher, about it won’t I?” you interject.

     His face goes from his handsome boyish grin to fake terror in a split second, “I will give you whatever grade you want in my class if you don’t do that, she’d go on for hours, might even keep you after class just to rub it in my face.”  

     You could tell that there was some truth to his words, and you know your gender studies professor well enough to know that she really would just rip him a new one. You giggle back at him, unable to keep it in.

“She really would tear you to shreds, wouldn’t she?” you cackle. His face softens, “Yes she’s evil, just awaiting my downfall I swear!” he smiles softly at you.

You both look at each other a bit longer before Steve clears his throat. “Anyways um, I talked to the guy in campus security and you’re good to go, you don’t have to pay the ticket,” He spoke.

You had honestly completely forgotten that was the reason you were even in his office; his demeanor makes you feel at home in your own skin and were just happy to not have anxious thoughts rolling around inside of your head.

“Oh, right yeah, thank you so much, you really didn’t need to go through all this trouble for me,” you said.

“No trouble at all, really. I should probably get going though, my next class starts soon.” he explained looking at the very expensive looking watch on his wrist.

You try your best not to show your disappointment, wishing to stay in this little bubble with him a bit longer.

“Of course, yeah. Thank you again Steve,” you respond.

He leads you back out the door with his hand on your back again, maybe this time a bit firmer than the last, and you weren’t complaining. You both wave your goodbyes for the weekend before you head out to the parking lot, and he heads towards his next class.

You were relieved to be going home, this first week of school has tested you mentally and emotionally and you were ready for a little break. You hop in your car, and twist your key in the ignition, but to your surprise, instead of your car roaring to life like it usually does. It just stalled, unable to start. You try the ignition a few more times before you rest your head on your steering wheel.

Just your fucking luck

You take your phone out of your jean pocket and call Violet to see if she knows any good mechanics in the area. But you only get her voicemail. “Come on Vi,”you mutter to yourself, trying her cell again and again. Only to get her voicemail each and every time. You couldn’t very well leave your car in the parking lot overnight, then you’d surely get another ticket. But what other option did you have?

You make the decision to call Violet’s home phone, thinking maybe she’s too engrossed in a TV show or something to see her phone going off. It rings a few times before someone picks up.

“Munson residence.” a deep familiar voice answers the phone.

Shit

“Hi Mr. Munson, is Vi there?” you reply.

“Nah she left about an hour or two ago to head to work, everything okay?” he asks a slight concern in his voice.

“Oh uh yeah, my- my car just isn’t starting and I don’t know any mechanics in the area who could come and take a look at it,” you respond anxiously

You hear what you assume is him blowing out some smoke from his mouth, you shake your head trying to stay on track.

“Any mechanic out here is gonna charge you an arm an a leg to come look at your car right before the weekend, let me come and take a look at it myself,” he suggests.

Your body runs cold, you couldn’t deal with another interaction with BOTH of them in the same day again, you’d burst into flames.

“Oh gods no that’s really okay Mr. Munson. I’ll just leave my car here overnight its no big deal, I’ll just walk home its not that far,” You babble anxiously.

You hear him scoff on the other end of the phone, “What do you mean walk home? Where are you Y/N?” his tone getting a bit more serious than the lighthearted goofy tone you usually get from him.

“I’m at school, it’s fine really, my apartment isn’t that far from-,” you squeak.

“Let me just grab my tools and I’ll meet you in the parking lot, which building are you in front of?” he interjects, you can hear some rustling on the other end of the phone.

“I-,“ you think about arguing with him but you know that in the end Mr. Munson is a stubborn man and you will lose. “I’m in front of the Humanities and Social Sciences building, its right by-,“ you confess.

He chuckles “Oh yeah I know the one, be there in a sec, hang tight.” he says before hanging up the phone.

You bring your phone down onto your lap in defeat. You hide in your car until you see his car pull up, you don’t need anyone seeing you, especially a certain sociology professor. His big black truck pulls into the space next to you, and you get out of your car to greet him.

“Hey thanks for coming all the way out here, I hope I didn’t take you away from anything or anyone,” you look up at him innocently. He stands about a foot away from you, but even then, you could see just how much taller he is than you. He could probably use you as an arm rest.

He gives you an easy-going smile, “No problem at all sweetheart, I’m happy to help!” You give him the keys and he goes to try and start the car and it stalls again and he clicks his tongue.

Your mind going back to the dreams you’ve had of his tongue on you, on your skin. You shiver at the thought, and you squeeze your arms around you willing yourself not to fall apart.

Luckily, he didn’t seem to notice, too preoccupied with opening the hood and looking inside. He takes off his leather jacket and lays it on top of the hood and rolls up his sleeves. He fiddles around inside of the hood for a few seconds before popping his head around the corner.

“Looks like your spark plug is shot, I have an extra on me in case of emergencies, it’s your lucky day pretty lady,” He announces cheerily.

Pretty lady

“Oh, thank you Mr. Munson, you’re a life saver!” you beam.

He looks at you again one more time, studying you for the second time this week, he looks like he’s contemplating something in his head. His eyes are like lasers on your skin, heating you up from the inside.

“It’s Eddie, you can call me Eddie honey, you’ve known me long enough.” he says as he smiles at you, the edges of his eyes crinkling.

You can’t help but smile back, “Okay, thanks, E-eddie,” you stammer out. His name feeling so odd on your tongue, he’s your best friend’s dad, would Violet think its weird that you call him by his first name now?

He smiles contently like he made the right decision and goes back to working on your car. You lean against his car just watching him work, seeing how his hands knowingly move on all the parts of your car that you don’t even know the names of, only being able to identify the windshield wiper fluid cap and oil fill cap. You look at his now uncovered arms that you didn’t see the last time you got a good look at him, you could see right near his left wrist Violets name tattooed in beautiful cursive, and D20 right above his left elbow. You see how veiny his hands and arms are, probably due to years of playing the guitar and working on various motorcycles and cars.

“So, what are you going to school for?” he says, looking at you through the corner of his eye while he works.

“Psychology mostly,” you reply easily.

“What do you want to do with it? Your degree?” he responds.

“I’d love to work with kids, I felt like no one ever listened to me as a kid, so I’d love to be able to be a safe space for kids to express themselves.” You shared, this was something you’ve been passionate for a while, wanting to work with kids. Giving them something that you never got when you were a kid, a place where they felt understood even if they didn’t feel like that at home.

He looks up at you from his work with an impressed look on his face, “That’s really fucking cool Y/N, I wish stuff like that had been around when I was a kid. Woulda made Middle School and High School a lot more bearable for me, trust me.”

Your heartbreaks at his confession, you figured that he probably wasn’t always the suave sexy metal head that he is now, and he probably got teased a lot when he was a kid. It reminded you of your own experiences in school, teased and never really fitting in anywhere. Violet went through something similar except it never really seemed to bother her, she was always the type of kid that always knew who she was and didn’t let anyone get in her way. You always admired that about her.

“Honestly me too,” you confess.

Eddie raises an eyebrow at you, “No way, You and Vi had loads of friends in Middle School,” he says.

“Yeah, in Middle School sure, but high school was brutal without her there, kids are mean.” You say sadly, rubbing your boot into the asphalt trying to wash away depressing memories of eating in the bathroom and crying yourself to sleep at night.

Eddie scrunches his eyebrows together and nods knowingly, sharing that feeling. “Yeah, teenagers are fucking assholes.”

You nod knowingly, as Eddie steps around the front of your car to get into the driver’s seat, scootching closing to you, grabbing the side of your waist as he passes you. You take a shallow breath, and your mouth runs dry. His hand felt so perfect on your waist, like it belonged there… and then your mind wanders to Steve, his touch felt the same way.

Eddie got into the front seat and turned your key in the ignition, and sure enough your car roared to life.

“Huzzahh!” Eddie cheered, getting out of the driver’s seat and bowing to you. A smile plastered across his face in triumph.

“There ya go honey good as new, although you should stop by the house sometime, so I can put a new battery in your car, it looks like it’s about to take a shit on you, and I want you to be safe during the Winter.” He says casually wiping the oil and grease off his fingers with the rag in his tool kit.

He wants you to be safe

“That would be great, thank you again, honestly I don’t know what I would have done without you. What do I owe you Eddie?” you ask. Surely, he’d want some compensation for driving all the way out here on a Friday, probably ruining his plans to come help his daughters best friend with her car.

“On the house, and don’t fight me on this I’m not accepting any money from you.” He says slightly stern but in a way that makes you smile lightly.

“I’ll figure out a way to make it up to you or something, do you like cookies? I’ll bake you some cookies for all your help,” you insist.

“IF you happen to make double chocolate chip cookies and bring them over to the house, for Violet of course, I wouldn’t say no to one or two,” he says slyly.

“I’ll bring them over this weekend.” you say determined to not be in debt to him.

He packs his tools back into the trunk of his truck and shrugs his leather jacket back on, “I’ll hold you to that sweetheart.” he winks at you before getting back into his truck and waving to you as he drives off the lot.

You get back into your newly fixed car and drive home to your apartment, first thing on the agenda, a very cold shower.

The next few weeks had been an absolute whirlwind of epic proportions. Steve came back with your grades for your latest paper, and when yours got passed to you, at the top of your paper, “SEE ME AFTER CLASS” was written in blue pen. After class he explained that he was “very impressed” with your work and effort you spent on your paper and asked you to be his TA and help him a couple of days a week. Help him with grading papers, answering any questions your classmates had on assignments or class subjects, and help with lectures for upcoming classes. You couldn’t have said yes faster, not only did you have a huge massive crush on him. But you genuinely enjoyed his class and were excited to prove yourself. On those days you spent most of the time after your classes, spent huddled in his office with him grading papers or talking about different upcoming subjects you were going to learn in class. It was becoming one of your favorite parts of your day, you always left his office in the best mood. Plus, the flirting and your attraction to him only grew during this time, you noticed he started going more and more out of his way to touch you, or holding eye contact with you longer than was probably appropriate. You welcomed it, Steve made you feel like you were on cloud nine, some nights the two of you were left in his office until after dark, after all the work was done, just flirting and talking about life. Eating shitty takeout food that he’d grab from the cafeteria or the two of you would order in.

He always treated you with respect letting you talk about your feelings or whatever was on your mind, you eventually opening up to him about why you wanted to go into psychology, and he opened up to you about how he hadn’t always been the way he is now, and how there are parts of his past he’s ashamed of. The two of you bonded over your lack of family you had in your life, you told him about your parents basically ditching you after graduation and he told you about how his parents cut him off when he told them what decided what he wanted to do with his life and hadn’t heard much from him since. He reassured you that the only family that actually mattered was your chosen family and the people who love you that you let into your little corner of the world. You talked about your views on the world and your dreams. You liked that about him, that he listened to you and how modest and genuine he is, you assumed at first glance that someone with good looks like him and his upbringing he’d have an large ego. Which wasn’t entirely wrong, but not in a bad way. You’d come to really like Steve Harrington, he had an ego the size of a lake but a heart to match.

Which made it even more confusing on the days that you didn’t spend in his office. See you had saved up enough money for school and your expenses for the first couple of weeks, but that money only stretched so far. So, you looked for a job, and you became desperate. Being in a college town, good jobs that weren’t already taken by other college students were far and few between and being a TA wasn’t enough. So, one night after school when you were at Violets, Eddie overheard you talking about your dilemma, and offered you a job working for him. Eddie worked as a record producer and worked closely with a few music managers who were looking for social media manager. Which you happily accepted, there were no set hours and you could do a majority of your work in your pjs at home unless you needed to get Eddies opinion on something then you’d spend time out in the garage with him while he gave you advice or things the label is looking for in terms of the clients image or engagement numbers you needed to hit.

Sometimes you’d even make up excuses just to go over and spend time with him in the garage. He was patient with you while you slowly opened up to him about things that had happened over the past few years that you never wanted to worry Violet with, cheating boyfriends, bad friends, financial problems, and he took it all with stride, listening to and giving advice where he could. He’d spend time reminiscing about the “glory days” when his band, Corroded Coffin, used to play gigs every weekend at the hideout, a small bar on the outside of town. Or when he was in high school, he ran a club in school called the Hellfire Club where all his friends would play DnD, he even showed you that he got Hell Fire tattooed across his knuckles. You’d spend hours over there just tucked away in Eddies little corner of the house, sometimes he’d play songs for you on his guitar, or when he found out you had never played DnD he spent a few nights teaching you all the basics in case you ever wanted to play. You liked the way you felt when you were around Eddie, in a similar way that Steve did, Eddie quieted your thoughts of self-doubt and anxiety that usually swirled around in your head. You really liked Eddie, and it made your feelings even more confused because you felt guilty keeping all of this from Violet. You didn’t know how she would react to you having a crush on her dad, and you never wanted to put your friendship with her in danger. She was basically the only family you had, and you intended to keep it that way, even if it meant keeping your crush on her father a secret.

It all came to a head about a month later. You were staying late in Steve’s office grading papers while he was reading over some scientific studies that he was going to go over in class that following week. You were reading over a specific paper, a girl who sat behind you in class, who giggled at Steve during the first day of class. She had a lot of typos in her paper, and you had a hard time following her methods and asked for Steves opinion. He got up from his desk and went over to the other side of his desk where you were sitting, hovering over you so his face was close to yours. You loved when he did this, being able to see the honey bits in his eyes or the way his eyebrows scrunch together when he was thinking really hard, or how he ran his tongue along his lips to wet them.

 For some reason the air in the room seems extra electrified, the tension being so thick, you could cut it with a knife. Your breath hitched as he got extra close to read a specific part in the paper, you could smell his cologne so clearly it was intoxicating. Steve turned to you to tell you what points to dock from her paper, but you didn’t hear a single word he was saying, it was all drowned out by the lust you felt for him. You think he could sense it too, his eyes kept flickering between your eyes and your lips.

Oh gods was this really happening?

You could see his face getting closer and closer to yours, you closed your eyes, bracing for impact. Your heart was beating faster than you ever thought humanly possible. And then, he kissed you. More intensely than you’d ever been kissed before, he started out soft, testing the waters. Slowly brushing his lips against yours, working up intensity until his tongue prodded your lips asking for an invitation in. The invitation happily accepted by you, you welcomed him in with your lips and sighed into the kiss, allowing your hand to grasp at the hairs at the nape of his neck. He held onto the side of your face like if he let go, you’d vanish. You kissed like this for a minute or two, lips melding together and tongues intertwining. He tasted like his spearmint gum that he chews sometimes, and his lips were softer than you ever thought humanly possible.

But as quickly as it started, it stopped. Steve de-tangled himself from your grip and stood back.

“Fuck, holy shit, I- Y/N I’m so sorry, I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have done that. I’m your teacher for Christ’s sake… FUCK!” he shouted.

You jump at the volume of his voice, you were not used to this Steve, or the tone he was using. He paced around the room for a few minutes, and you looked at your shoes embarrassed. Embarrassed because you weren’t sorry it happened. You had been dreaming for weeks about what his lips would feel like or what he'd taste like.

“I’m not Steve, you don’t need to be sorry because.. because I wanted it to happen, I’ll only be your student for a few more months and then after that we can do whatever we want,” you blurt out in desperation. Allowing the thoughts and dreams that hide in your head to spill out of your mouth. Steve sighs and sits back down in his chair, taking his glasses off his face and pinching the bridge of his nose with his middle finger and thumb.

“I- I think you should just go Y/N, I need to figure out what to do. This shouldn’t have happened and I’m sorry it did,” he murmurs.

His words act like daggers in your heart, stealing all the breath from your lungs. All the worst-case scenarios that played out in your head when you felt insecure, now playing out right in front of you. You were angry, you know he feels the same way but he’s too much of a coward to do anything about it.

“Fuck you Steve, fuck you!” you bite out through your teeth, not allowing the tears to flow from your eyes, just yet. He just rejected you, the last thing you wanted was for him to see you cry. You pack up all the things that had been splayed-out all over Steve’s desk, shoving them into your bookbag, and storming out of the room.

Before you’re even out of the building the tears start streaming down your face, you choke back sobs as you get into your car. You bury your head in your hands, your shoulders shaking from how hard you were crying. You can’t go home, you thought. Not to an empty apartment where it’s even more apparent just how alone you are.

You put the key into the ignition and go to the only other place in town that you can think of going to, Violet’s house. You prayed to any god that could hear you, that Violet was home, but Eddie was not. You did not want him to see you like this, especially over a guy. He’d heard all the pathetic stories of love that hadn’t worked out you didn’t need to add another to the list.

Somehow luck was on your side with this, Eddie’s car was not in the driveway, only Violets. You get out of the car, not even bothering to lock it and run up to the door and let yourself inside with the key Violet had given you after your first week in Hawkins. Tears still streaming down your face, you take in your new surroundings; Violet was sitting on the couch watching some dumb rom com and eating popcorn. She looks startled by the sudden intrusion and the state you were in. Your mascara all smudged, and you had tears streaming down your face.

“Y/N? What happened?” she coos. She gets off the couch and walks over to you, her face softens when she gets closer to you, her face now shrouded in worry. She pulls you fiercely into a hug and just lets you cry on her shoulder. Eventually she brings you over to the couch and she gets you to tell her the events that have unfolded. She listened intently while you told her about your professor and how you felt about him, and then about how he rejected you after a mind-blowing kiss. She held your hand the entire time, rubbing soothing circles into your hand.

Just as you had finished telling her what happened you heard the familiar jingle of the doorknob and the heavy boots that followed. You couldn’t look at him right now, not when you looked like this.

“Hey, hey party people, I didn’t know you were coming over tonight I shoulda got more beer from the store!” Eddie sang. The closer Eddie got to you he realized something was off and stopped in his tracks.

“Now’s not a good time dad,” Violet said, still focusing her attention on you.

“What happened? Y/N are you okay? Are you hurt? Did something happen with your car?” his questions flying by you a million miles a minute. Too exhausted to say anything you let Violet speak for you.

“She kissed a guy at school, and he rejected her,” Violet says as softly as she can.

“Y/N kissed a guy at school?” he said, you could hear an edge in his voice that made you flinch slightly.

“Yes, dad god did you have to repeat it? She’s been through enough tonight. Come Y/N lets go upstairs.” She says clearly annoyed with her dad’s lack of empathy.

You couldn’t bear to look at Eddie, so you allow Violet to usher you upstairs into her room. You two cuddle up in her bed, she lets you borrow some clothes to spend the night in and gives you a makeup wipe to wash the mascara and mostly cried off eyeliner off your face. You felt so taken care of by her, you remember you used to do this for her in Middle School when boys would be shitheads to her, it took a lot to break Violet, but boys are the worst.

At some point Violet fell asleep when you guys were listening to a true crime podcast, you felt your tummy grumble and slowly slipped out of her room to find a snack in the kitchen. You were so worked up after the incident with Steve you had forgotten to eat something more than a few handfuls of popcorn. Downstairs was more quiet than usual, you couldn’t hear soft metal music coming from the garage or Eddies light humming. You assumed maybe he had gone out for the night.

     Until he scared the shit out of you sitting at the kitchen table, silently. He looked upset, nursing a glass of amber liquid in his hand.

“Holy fuck you scared me, warn a woman, jeez!” you say, sounding a little more like your normal self when your alone with him. Usually, Eddie would retort with a smart-ass remark, but instead you got silence and a slight sad smile on his face. You sense he’s not in the mood, so you move farther into the kitchen to grab yourself an iced tea from the fridge and make yourself a sandwich.

It was usually never this awkward between the two of you, it broke your heart a bit. You just lost Steve and now it felt like you were losing Eddie too.

“Did he kiss you or did you kiss him?” he asked quietly.

You jumped a little not expecting him to speak. Trying to word things very carefully so there was no confusion.

“He kissed me and then I kissed him back, and then he broke off the kiss and told me to leave.” You sigh sadly and take a big gulp of your iced tea.

“Idiot.” he muttered under his breath.

You thought that’s what you heard but you didn’t know for certain.

“What?” you question.

“I said he’s an idiot.” he said a bit louder for you to hear clearly.

That made your aching heart flutter inside your chest. Men are impossible to read.

“Oh.” you murmur, not really sure what to say.

“He’s an idiot because I’d never let a girl like you go,” he says calmly.

You heart could beat outside of your chest right now, his words set your skin on fire. But you were simultaneously hit with overwhelming guilt. Violet. Your best friend. The one sleeping soundly upstairs who would never do anything to hurt you.

“Yeah, but there’s a lot more at stake here,” You say trying to tread lightly.

He abruptly pushes out of his chair and heads to the garage door. “Yeah I know.” he says, sounding a mix between disappointed and angry.

You could feel a new rush of tears welling in your eyes, not only did you lose Steve today, but you were going to lose Eddie too. Two out of your three safe spaces, gone in one day. You felt so small, like you were free falling and you couldn’t grab anything to save yourself.

“What do you want from me Eddie?” you say defeated, barely above a whisper.

Eddie stops at your words, opening up the door to the garage, so close to freedom. His eyes now soft, seeing the state of you. “Nothing sweetheart, I want nothing from you.”

You just nod at his words, slouching your shoulders trying to protect your broken heart. Willing yourself to accept the fact that you lost both of them today, and there’s nothing that you can do to change it. You look at the floor, watching your tears slowly cloud your vision. You just hoped he left the room before you start actually crying.

Then you hear the garage door shut and feel the last of your heart shatter with it. You look up to confirm what your heart already knew, that Eddie was gone.

But where a closed door should be, showed the outline of Eddie standing in front of a closed door. You tried to blink away the tears, to try and figure out if you were seeing things correctly. The look on Eddies face was between a mixture of pain and confliction, his fists squeezed at his sides.

“Fuck it.” is the last thing you hear him say before he takes long strides over to you in the kitchen. Now right in front of you he cradles your face in his hands and kisses you firmly. You wrap your arms around his neck, forcing him to stay. His calloused hands wiping away your tears. You moan into his touch, opening your mouth and allowing his tongue to dance with yours. He kisses you with such passion, showing you with actions he what couldn’t say with his words. You push him impossibly closer to you, willing the two of you to meld into one if that what it took, not letting him have the chance to leave you. He takes that as an invitation to lift you up and put you on the ledge of the kitchen counter. Your legs caging him in on either side of his body.

“Please don’t go.” you mutter wetly between kisses. Eddie moves from your mouth and leaves kisses from the edges of your wet eyes to a part on your neck that made your skin irrupt in goosebumps.

“Never baby, m not goin anywhere I promise.” he reassures nuzzling his nose against a sweet spot on your neck. You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. Feeling a little better than you did a minute ago. Kissing Eddie made every other rational thought cease to exist in your brain. Just you, and Eddie, your bodies moving in tandem with each other. Harmony.

No Pressure Tags: **Let me know if you wanna be added to the tag list!**

@untitled74745 @eddiemunsons-missingnipple @lesservillain

@starkeysprincess @tlclick73 @cozyquinn @rowanswriting @succubusmunson @teddyeyeseddie @lofaewrites @chaoticmunsons @ryan-waddell11 @sweetblinginrose @paleidiot

[ivysprophecy]

Am I Okay? Chapter Three

summary: in part twelve rafe mentions a work party and i took that as an invitation to dive into how they interact and think about each other a bit more from rafes perspective!

word count: 1295

a/n: I KNOW I POSTED THIS CHAPTER PREVIOUSLY, it had some mistakes i wanted to fix that i just relaized. also im not saying this is the most accurate portrayal of rafe however its how im using it for the story and i really hope this doesnt suck as much as i think it does! also im so sorry for how long its been since ive written, i shouldve put out a hiatus notice but tbh im not entirely sure im back. well see how it goes lol. thank you for reading!

this shouldnt feel as daunting as it does right now. shes just a friend. its just a dinner party, theres no commitments attached or technicalities to worry over. its just me and her making a boring evening more exciting.

thats all.

i knock on the door and wait patiently for her to answer. i did come a bit early so i wouldnt be surprised if she was still getting ready. she has a tendency to get swept up in the music shes listening to when shes at her vanity.

but as soon as she opens that door and i turn to see her... i suddenly forgot all the convincing i was doing, cause i know after tonight theres gonna be no more hiding just how into her i am. she looks incredible.

it does something to me knowing its the dress i bought her.

"hi," thats all she says and i swear i forgot how to breathe. how does she do this to me?

"hey," my smile widens, "you look... gorgeous. really, you look great."

"cant take all the credit, the dress was all your doing. im just wearing it."

"and you wear it beautifully," just like that, a natural blush replaces the artificial pink on her cheeks "we should get going, are you ready or do you need more time? i can wait."

"i think im ready..." she searches through her purse, going over its contents making sure she has everything. "yep, im ready."

"perfect," i close the door behind her as she walks out, "its a little jarring to see you without your boots."

she chuckles as i open  the car door for her, "i tried to clean up as nice as i could."

"you clean up just fine cowgirl," i cant hide my smile.

the drive to the event was that comfortable kind of quiet. i always let her take aux when we drive together. country music definitely isnt my favorite but she could play a lot worse. besides she throws in the occasional kid cudi or metro boomin for me.

shes thoughtful like that. 

"oh theres valet? how fancy," the valet opens her door for her before i can even get out of the car. i suppose thats his job.

"thats kinda how these things go. theyre a bit much."

"well i think its refreshing being so spoiled. dads done a lot of fancy business but nothing like this. its fun."

taking her hand, i lead her up the stairs into the building, "ill spoil you as much as you want cowgirl. all you have to do is ask."

"youre such a sweet talker city boy. for someone who, supposedly, is a serial bachelor youre an absolute flirt."

"nah, i only flirt with you," i tell her, truthfully. part of me said it to see her all flustered but really there isnt a point in lying about it.

i know everyones got me figured out already, the guys and their girls are better gossipers than the real housewives. not that id know anything about the real housewives. i definitely dont watch that shit. 

"thats exactly what im talking about," shes giggling as we walk into the giant room filled to the brim with investors, partners, staff, clients, a bunch of people i really want to avoid. i was about to lead her over to the bar when we run into someone conveniently.

her father. that i work with. awesome. i knew hed be here, but i thought it might be possible to avoid him.

"cameron! thought i wouldnt be able to catch you tonig- y/n? pumpkin what are you doing here?"

"dad! were in public could you maybe not call me that-"

i let a smile peak through, "pumpkin?" its just too easy to tease her.

"rafe," she sends me a warning, and you know she means business when she uses my ‘government name’ as she likes to call it. i throw my hands up in defense jokingly.

"its good to see you y/l/n," i reach out to shake her dads hand, "i invited her, hoping a friendly face would make the night more barrable. i hope thats alright with you."

"nah its good for her. she needs to get out more. i trust youll take care of her."

"dad!" she raises her tone while keeping a hushed voice, "dont talk about me like im not here. please."

"you kids have fun tonight," her dad wraps an arm around her before pressing a small kiss to her temple before shaking my hand again, "good to see you rafe. take care of my little girl."

i nod with a smile as he walks away, heading over to a table of some other clients i recognize.

"unbelievable! rafe im so sorry that was embarrassing. he doesnt know how to act normal. i shouldnt let him out of the house. i need to put him in a home."

"cowgirl, youre rambling. its fine, i get it. hes a dad its his job to embarrass you a little. besides, pumpkin, i thought it was endearing," theres a smirk on my face as i mention the nickname.

she rolls her eyes leading the way back to the bar like we intended in the first place. leaning against the bar she tells the bartender her order and mine, already knowing id like a whiskey.

how am i not supposed to like this girl so much when she knows me so well? i dont care if we come from two completely different backgrounds. a part of me knows this is the girl for me. if im deserving? thats a different conversation…

taking our drinks off the counter i lead her over to our table for the night, pulling out her seat for her to sit when suddenly i see some investors walking my way.

i knew id have to work a little tonight but it doesnt stop me being disappointed from being pulled away from her. 

the night goes on, i introduce her to a few of the people i know better than others, but i give her the chance to mingle when she wants too. shes so well spoken and holds her own well.

shes mesmerizing.

at one point, i return from the restroom, and when i come back i see that one of the investors sons is making conversation with her. a particularly annoying one at that. hes far too close to her for my liking, touching her arm subtly, desperately trying to make her laugh. but i can see shes only doing it to be polite.

i step up right beside her, my hand naturally falling to the small of her back, innocently of course.

"jared! good to see you man, your dad let you come?"

theres nothing i love to see more than his confidence falter. he needed to be put in his place, what can i say? im just happy i was the one to get to do it.

"something like that. it was good seeing you rafe. nice meeting you...?" he smiled in her direction, asking for one more chance silently, i couldnt contain my laughter.

"have a nice night jared. tell your dad ill see him at mondays meeting," and with that i lead her away in the direction of our table.

"you didnt have to be so rude to him you know?"

"cowgirl, that was hardly rude of me. i was doing him a favor."

she plasters on an offended face, pretending to clutch her pearls, "how dare you, im a catch. hed be so lucky to have me, and so would you."

god, shes such a tease.

believe me gorgeous girl, i know id be so lucky to have you. its all i think about nowadays.

[ masterlist ]

[heelluring]

— his regrets... • l.hs

wherein the sinner was once again hit by guilt but he guessed, it hurts the most when it hit the second time around [ part 1 ]

author's note ~ ! hi! so, i decided to write this since there are a lot of requests. i dont know if i ever gave the story any justice, i just hope i was able to deliver what i want to write. anyways, here you go. happy reading!

Heeseung stands outside the restaurant that both of you frequently visits. in the past, he'll drive to the restaurant while u're the one entertaining him through the passenger's seat. he'll call u pretty and will watch as a soft blush stain ur cheeks together with a subtle hit on his arms in attempt to hide your shyness. Both of you were happy that time, heeseung was happy, you were happy— when did everything go wrong?

oh, right. he cheated. he did the very same thing he promised he wouldn't do when you said yes to him. cheating with her older sister at that. what is he thinking, right? Heeseung also, didn't know.

And as much as he regret it, it wouldn't change a thing. He'll never feel your presence in his arms, again or feel how your lips fit so well in his.

It's been years since he saw even your shadows but you're still the one haunting his mind. After getting caught with his affair, he immediately ran after you but was failed. Came running to your apartment, but no one was there. Your landlord assured him though, he was told that your things are still in the apartment and that made him hope, maybe this will be a passing tumbles? Maybe he can still fix this?

He was definitely wrong. It was all but a delusion. You never came even if he waited for almost a week in that apartment just leaving whenever he had to go to work. But, you successfully avoided him. The next time he came, your apartment was wide open, your things were gone including you, and workers from the complex are now starting to clean the unit for the new potential buyers.

You successfully vanished through his life, didn't even get him a chance to see you before completely walking out of his life. The same time you left, so is heeseung's life started to crumble. He was called by the HR department one day, saying he's just there to talk. Though the way they have every evidence of his infidelity and disgusting rendezvous with Rina told him otherwise. That's just like a punch for him. Your crying and pained face draws on his mind, he can't think about anything but how hurt you were the day you found out. He was a jerk, a sinful man that doesn't deserve any forgiveness. If all, it just made another salt that was rubbed on his wounds. He was so stupid. How could he do that?

After all the things you did for him, this is what he decided to give back and thus, karma's out for him. Things happened so fast that when he came into realization, the company already sent a letter making him choose if they'll forcefully fire him or he'll just voluntarily resign. It doesn't matter anyways. His business was all the employees could talk about for the past few weeks, even if he gets fired or resigned, doesn't matter because people knew what he did and that goes the same with Rina. With no stable income, life was hard. Heeseung had a hard time applying in a new position. No one's accepting him, in the end, he became content with jobs that had nothing to do with his past career. Being a janitor or a delivery guy, he did everything and anything just to survive.

"Heeseung? what are you doing there? There's a lot of people since dinner already started, we need you at the back" Even being a waiter in your favorite restaurant was one of the things he did just to put food in his mouth. But he knew it wasn't just because of that. Heeseung wanted to be able to hold at least one small fragment of your memory that was still enclosed in this restaurant. Because, every time he sees that one special corner, he was able to be happy at least for a short period of time.

"Serve the new guests, it's on table 15" Heeseung nodded at that taking the menus on his arm before walking towards the table. It was a couple, the man was the only one he could see while the woman's back was facing him. A certain feeling took over his system. The woman looks familiar but that's impossible. Heeseung shook his head and his doubt, before putting on a smile.

"Good evening, and welcome to Chaconne. My name is Evan, and I would be your server for the night. Here's our—" His tongue was cut off when the woman looked at him. It was you, it was really you. Heeseung wanted to cry, to just get on his knees and say all the things he couldn't get to say all these years. But, who is he fooling? He knew that what he really wanted to do was to hide in shame and guilt. He always wanted to appear in front of you as a successful and strong person but instead, you saw this side of him. The one who's currently paying his dues with karma. You didn't say anything, just looking at him with sadness in eyes. He can't read that sadness as something different though. He knew that it was accompanied with pity, pity with someone you're just acquainted with.

"Sir? Are you alright?" The guy you're with asked. "Ah.. ah— yes. Yes, I am. I'm sorry for that, Sir. So here's our menu..." It was smooth, he was able to calm down. He needs to be professional, he can't afford losing this job and he also can't afford to make you uncomfortable. After a while, the guy who he knew called Jay called him again to take the orders. It was an understatement when we say heeseung can't take his eyes off of you that whole night. You look beautiful as ever, the only difference is that you look happier. Jay said something to you, and that made your eyes widen in bliss before giggling, hitting him softly with your hands. As a man, heeseung knew how Jay loves you. The way he looks at you, how he softly caresses your hand on his, drawing small shapes on its surface in process, how he smiles just to you was all he needed to know. Besides, it's the same look he's given to you. You look so happy, you might as well be glowing when you're with him. Heeseung on the other hand, can't do anything but be happy for you. You now feel at peace and secured, it's a long way from how miserable you have been with him and heeseung can't help but thank the one above for that. Even when you two finally finished your dinner, leaving gracefully with your chivarious man supporting you, heeseung can't help but to follow you with his eyes.

Oh how he wished, he was that man. Heeseung was not a saint. Of course, on top of being happy for you, he also felt bitterness creeping up his system. But it's all in vain.

"Hey, heeseung." One of his co-workers called when it was closing time handing him a dark blue colored envelope. "Remember the couple you served earlier? The woman told me to give this to you." His eyes widened, taking the envelope before saying his goodbyes to the other workers. He was in the park when he decided to open it. A can of beer, and a cup of ramen placed hastily on his side as he took the envelope out. It was elegant and sealed, he flipped it twice before carefully ripping through it when he made sure there were no written words outside.

Hey, heeseung. It's been awhile, years even. I know things didn't end well between us. I don't know if you're angry at me for the things I also did just to get back at you, and I won't blame you if you are. It doesn't matter though, I will still say sorry for those things. I was driven by my anger and pain, and because of that you lose your means to support yourself. I'm sorry Heeseung... for everything. For me, those moments were nothing but a memory, just a painful part of my past. I was able to move on and I hope that goes the same with you. You don't need to suffer, give yourself a chance again. Forgive yourself.

It's nice to see you again, Heeseung. You might not believe this but I hope you'll be happy, I am hoping for your best.

Heeseung didn't know he was crying until a tear stains the paper, the next thing he knew, his vision was blurry. "You were still saying sorry to me even though we knew I deserved it? Even wishing me happiness when I'm the one who took that away from you in the past. Y/n... how can you be so cruel?" His thumb brush on your signed name, as he whispers those words. How come, after all these years, you're still the one who can make himself feel understood. His whole system was numb, can't feel anything aside from pain. Is this the kind of pain you felt that night? Heeseung's happiness was with you but now, yours was nowhere with him. He feels relieved, yet there's a bittersweet feeling because this just means that he has to let you go, that this will be the last night he'll have a touch on your memories.

"Thank you... thank you so much... and i love you..."

heelluring, 2024

likes, reblogs, and comments are deeply appreciated ❤️

[vonbabbitt]

My Final Statement on Discord Drama (Why I'm Not a Mean & Evil For Turning Away Discord Asks)

hello jason. we are going to discuss this one final time and then never again.

from now on, i will be giving zero attention whatsoever to discord drama asks. i will not be posting about them or replying to them in any way. since people are sending me asks now acknowledging that they arent supposed to be sending me discord drama asks but are doing it anyway, i want to make a statement on this explaining myself so people dont just think im being mean and avoiding responsibility for moderating my discord server. please hear me out on my reasoning.

this is my personal blog! this is the first thing i always say when this comes up so lets keep it that way! this is my personal blog, regardless of how much tetro content i engage with here. when im on my personal blog enjoying personal time, i dont want to be dealing with work. you can call that me avoiding responsibility, but i dont think its unreasonable to want time to myself outside of work where i dont have to deal with the tetro discord server. this is exactly why we have a ticket system!

we have a ticket system! the server has a ticket system. this is THE ONLY PLACE to report discord server drama, because this is the only place the whole moderation team can access your complaint! there is no reason that i specifically have to be the one to review your complaint and not a different moderator. we have a moderation team for a reason. you do not know me, i do not know you, and there is no reason you need to bring your complaint to me PERSONALLY. if you think there is, and theres a specific reason it needs to be ME who answers your complaint, there is a solution: ask for me specifically when you open your ticket!

if you go outside of the ticket system, we cannot discuss anything with you. im not having a conversation about moderation on my public blog where everyone can see it, especially if youre naming specific people in your complaint. its unprofessional and invasive. if you go through the ticket system, we can talk! i can let you know what came of your complaint and what we're doing as a team to help. the ask i got this morning was complaining about an issue that has already been discussed with the parties involved, which they would know if they had gone through the ticket system instead of my ask box.

i encourage you to try just communicating with each other. ive received so many complaints in my ask box from people who i know for a fact have made no attempt to discuss their issue with the parties involved. i know im a kindergarten teacher, but we are not toddlers! in fact, even in my kindergarten class, when my kids come up to me and tell me another kid is doing something they dont like, i tell them to tell the other kid they dont like it! and this is the same advice i will give to you! talk your issue out with the parties involved! "but von babbitt, im afraid of confrontation." im sorry to hear that, but im not such a fan of confrontation myself! this is why ive got a moderation team and a ticket system! and when i have to do my job, i do it anyway. with all due bluntness: i think its inconsiderate and irresponsible to come running to my personal ask box and demand i fight your battles for you without making any attempt to do anything on your own, including any attempt to use the server ticket system, which we have set up for the exact purpose of solving your problems for you.

im allowed to just say no! the main issue is the fact that ive already asked people to stop and theyre still doing it anyway. i said no, and that means stop. its a very very very very simple ask. stop sending me discord drama asks. ive asked you to stop. if you know it makes me upset, and you choose to do it anyway while acknowledging it makes me upset, why would i want to help you??? why would i feel inclined to break server rules and go out of my way for you??? youre being purposefully rude and inconsiderate towards me.

i hope this helps to clarify my stance a bit. im sorry if this comes off as harsh but im really really sick of this and id really like it to stop. ive put every measure in place to allow people to easily report things without coming to my personal blog. thank you for giving me the time of day and i hope this is at least something people will keep in mind

[jaggedamethyst]

…look for the light

joel miller x f!reader | 2.7k

pairing: joel miller (tlou) x fem reader

content: you're tired of hearing that old slogan from the fireflies...but maybe you should give it a chance.

notes: 18+ minors dni, eventual smut for the girlies (smfh + side eye) also unprotected in the heat of the moment unfortunately…dont be like them! angst because it's my specialty, mental health depictions (illusions to death, depression, etc. do not read if that's a serious trigger) this takes place in the time jump between tlou 1 and tlou 2…tons of existential crisis otw, grief, everything unfortunately…and i still don’t believe in proofreading

also this is the longest i've written so far...of course it involves joel too...hashtag need that.

 ࿐ ࿔*:·ﾟ🍂🌿༄。°          ° 。༄🌿🍂·ﾟ*࿔ ࿐

You hadn’t arrived in Jackson on your own. At the time, you were one of a family of four. As time passed, the number dwindled along with your will to live. Back when everything was normal--or as normal as it could’ve been in a world that corrupt, you saw a therapist. You knew it was in their career description to listen. It helped sometimes, others it didn’t. Overall, though, you’d say they’d done a shit job if at the first sign of loss, you wanted to cease to exist. 

When you weren’t overthinking, you found yourself on patrol. It became ironic that you rejoiced at the sight of a fresh dead body. Knowing that the person before you had made a mistake you could now avoid lit a small fire in you. The flame didn’t last long though, quickly blown out every day with a speed just as fast as its ignition. 

To be candid, there was this guy. Well, this man. You couldn’t do him the injustice of calling him anything but a man. You saw him often--sometimes to himself, others with this girl. No matter the circumstance, though, he rarely spoke. You liked that. Something about people who acknowledged their capability to not speak made you extremely happy. Silence is a valid option. 

As an observer, you learned his name was Joel, the girl Ellie. They’d arrived about the same time as you, which explained the lack of interaction. This was, of course, aside from glances, the fake half-ass smiles you exchanged, and your time on patrol together. 

Unfortunately, he was the worst. It absolutely burned you up. That, and the fact that even when he annoyed you, you wanted to have extremely private time with him. 

The first time you actually spoke, he’d found you by a stream. You didn’t know he was showing the girl, Ellie, something that day. But as you lay with your eyes closed, taking in the sunlight--a shadow cascaded over you. 

You opened one eye to see who’d stepped in the way. Before you could get a word out, he spoke, “You from Jackson?”

“Who’s asking?” You created a sort of visor over your eyes with your hand. 

He huffed, “someone from Jackson.” 

Resuming your position on the ground, you spoke, “You some sort of Jackson cop? You seem like the cop type.” 

He scoffed. You realized he did that a lot, not speaking, making annoyed sounds. Not answering questions directly. 

“You should get back.” 

With a quirked brow, you replied, “I’m good, thanks.” 

“Wasn’t really a question.”

“Didn’t say it was.” 

By this point you’d opened your eyes again, surveying the man. You kind of felt bad for being snippy but honestly, he interrupted your “alone with my thoughts” time. Some people can cope without thinking of the same incidents in a constant loop. Not you--you liked the hurt. It reminded you to be safe. To not trust people. 

Even in that position, though, you observed the man. He looked rough, but in a way that motioned toward experience. There were hints of gray in his hair, yet he didn’t look old. His shirt was slightly opened, tattered. The sheen of sweat covering him made him all the more alluring in the sunlight. 

“Are you gonna get the hell up and get a move on or what?” 

You didn’t know him at the time, or that he was trying to surprise Ellie on her birthday. Even worse, that on this day, he’d thought of his daughter. He was coping. Anyone or anything out of place was shattering the amazing plan he had made to go a day without feeling like a disappointment. 

He didn’t know that your “alone with my thoughts” time often consisted of thinking of your family. You’d willed yourself to shut your eyes tight, picturing those you lost; it was the only time you could see them. If you got lucky, you could dream of them. If you were unlucky, you’d see images of their mangled bodies. 

It seemed that even awake, your luck was the fucking worst. 

With swift and silent movements, you stood and turned to leave. Avoiding eye contact was the only way to hide the tears prickling in your eyes. 

“Dude,” a young voice called out, “you hurt her feelings!”

“Fuck, I didn’t mean to, Ellie!” 

Like you said, he was the worst. But you definitely took it to the next level at every opportunity. 

That’s how you found yourself on patrol with Joel giving him the silent treatment. It was customary at this point. If you two went alone, he would bark out orders, you’d follow if you felt like it. If someone else happened to be there, you two would rely on an unspoken rule to only speak to them and not one another. It worked…until today. 

Entrapment wasn’t a new feeling for you. Often on patrol specifically, you would have to maneuver your way out of dangerous positions to return. But the realization of there being nobody to return to hit you today. So even when Joel and Jesse said to stay back, you proceeded. It was a miracle none of you three were bitten or worse. Your reckless act left the trek back to Jackson completely silent. 

When you reached the gate safely, Jesse spoke first. It was obvious he was shaken up but even more annoyed with you. “Kinda fucked up you did that. Did you even consider that you would put me and Joel in danger?” 

“Nobody told you to follow me, to be honest.” 

“I don’t give a fuck! When we leave, we work together… or we don’t go.” 

Joel shook his head silently, observing the way Jesse continued to rip into you. You continued the back and forth until Jesse hit extremely low. 

“Look, I know you lost people…I remember them-”

You spoke over him, a finger out in warning, “Don’t-” 

“And just because you feel like there is no worth left in your sorry ass life, doesn’t mean I wanna die right now. Not for you. Not on a stupid patrol mission.” 

It felt like he punched you. Square in the face. The way your breath left you was unlike anything you’d ever experienced. Not since the day you realized your entire family was gone. As a result of that day, you grew accustomed to silent walks back to your house. You got used to the sounds your house made between the silence. 

You didn’t hear Joel’s faint footsteps and persistent calls to you as he followed behind. It wasn’t until the unusual sound of your door not immediately closing behind you that you turned around to see him there. 

“You didn’t even stop him, you just stood there like you always do!”

His signature sigh and no response. Just a sort of expectant look on his face. 

“Get. Out. Please.” 

You begged him to leave, your voice breaking. It was somewhere in the midst of you slowly falling toward the floor that he reached you. He knew what you were experiencing right now. The dull panging in your body, a faint scream at you, and a feeling that of anyone it should’ve been you to go, not your family. 

He didn’t want to admit that he recognized the bubble of sadness around you, as he’d be forced to acknowledge his own. The least he could do was to comfort you in a way he had yearned for when he lost Sarah. When he lost Tess. When he thought Tommy was gone. But he failed, as he always did, crying with you. 

He urged you to quiet your sobs, “It’s okay, shhh.” 

His attempts at soothing you were a sort of reassurance to himself--that it was okay. It could be okay. He eventually grasped your face, too, forcing you to look at him. He wanted you to believe him, despite the lack of conviction in his voice. The eye contact shocked you both. You had never seen the man cry let alone been this close to him. From a distance, it's easy to think that any dark-colored eye is just black but his…

“Brown…” You mumbled incoherently. 

“What?”

“Your eyes. I’ve never really looked at ‘em.” 

He was confused, “yeah, brown.” 

“It's just that, it's easy to overlook things…” when you’re so stuck in the past, you wanted to say. But you left it. You had a feeling he understood. 

It was hard to not lean into his touch, even harder to not want to be near him. He noticed you staring, but there was still so much left unsaid. Thinking about it, he never really allowed himself to carry out a conversation with you. But there was an unspoken attraction between you. It was easy to minimize said attraction to one where you needed each other. It was suffice to say that it was more tantamount to the way particles were reliant on one another. Even more, the way symbiosis occurred. Despite the urge to push one another away, you knew that you did, in fact, need each other. 

If not for a long time, at least for now. 

Without a word, you pushed up a bit, meeting your lips with his. He was obviously taken aback; there was so much behind the kiss…but he couldn’t bring himself to care. 

You pulled at his shirt, that damned shirt he always liked to wear. Always opened slightly, but never enough to give you what you needed.

“Can I?” You broke the kiss and motioned toward the buttons, breaking eye contact for a second. 

Joel let out a characteristic sound, affirming you, “Mhm, yeah…” 

You moved your hands lower, stopping at the close of his top. “Are you sure?” 

The man understood you. The shirt acted as a sort of metaphorical barrier between the two of you. As much as it scared the both of you to cross that line, there was an unspoken respect for one another. 

He noticed your apprehension, bearing the task of taking down that wall for you both. 

Joel unbuttoned his shirt, slowly, intentional in his action. 

He watched you shiver, “I haven’t…I want…I mean-” 

That same alluring stare maintained its gaze at you, Joel allowing you the time to process and say what you wanted to. 

“I want to feel…be close to you. Not because I want to use you or something…I just,” You searched for words that seemed to escape you. 

His words interrupted your thought process, a gentle but calloused hand returning to your face. 

“You don’t have to have a reason. Use me.” 

That was enough to make you attack him full force. You’d thought of each other so long that there was an urgency. There wasn’t time for niceties or the pleasantries of preparing yourself for him. You just wanted each other immediately. 

The trail of clothing that led to your room was something out of one of those old movies you watched. Before everything went to shit. You allowed yourself a smirk at the thought--Joel hot on your trail. 

Joel observed how clean your place was. He was one to keep tidy, too. Not for the thought of expecting someone, but for lack of people except him. There were few things he held near and dear, so a large space like his home was often unused save for his bed and couch. It seemed you echoed this thought, and that made him even more eager. Knowing you had so much in common made him insatiable.

You found yourselves kissing again, seeking comfort in each other. It was sweet and slow. You couldn’t handle it, the lack of him. 

“Joel, please,” you backed towards the bed. Now fully available for him. With you demanding everything be so structured to protect yourself these days, you were willing to let go for once. 

He didn’t say anything, he never did. But the way he hovered over you, maintained eye contact and pushed into you said enough. 

His pace was somewhere between painfully slow and slower. He felt your wetness, the way you were ready for him already, and it made him harder. He knew he wouldn’t last long if he went any faster. 

You reached up, pushing the hair out of his face. It was a distraction from how good it felt, even the purposely slow pressure, but you wanted more. 

You bucked up into him. He hissed and grunted in your ear, that’s new. 

The southern drawl was even more apparent on the man. “Shit. I’m tryin’ to…make it last,” his head met your shoulder, breath against your skin. “Cant.” 

“Don’t.” 

You couldn’t see his face, but you figured a look of surprise flashed there. It only took a second for him to pick up the pace. Those grunts filled the room; his wordless communication was now music to your ears. 

You continued that way for not much longer--but the high was unlike any other. He reached down to rub between you, making sure you’d finish. The thought of him caring about you in that way and the pointed pressure of his strong hands doing so was enough to make your body pulse against him. 

He pushed you back down, keeping you still, “Don’t move, baby.” 

It was a lot. 

His movements became even more erratic, but it felt so damn good. 

“Where should I?” 

You arched a brow, “You want a little Joel running around here somewhere?” 

He chuckled, so sweetly, too. Fuck. 

“Wow, even full like this you still got a mouth on ya. I’m gonna work on that.” 

He pulled out suddenly, and before you could even complain, latched his mouth onto you until he finished and your voice went dry from calling out his name. 

Okay…

The usual urge to freshen up never came. The smell of Joel was all over you, and you liked it that way. You breathed in and out, processing what happened, fighting to stay awake. The sound of the man’s snores was enough to keep you awake in itself. 

It wasn’t until you heard the snores stop and Joel stirring that you spoke again.

“I’m sorry.” 

Joel turned his head toward you, clearly still half asleep, “For?” 

“For that day, in the woods, when we first met. I was mean.” 

“I understand. A random guy shows up asking questions. You get defensive. It happens to the best of ‘em.” 

There was silence. One long enough that Joel sat up to get out of bed--you stopped him when you spoke. 

“I was thinking of my family,” a pause, and with it, your eyes burned a bit. “I don’t know why I act the way I do. I don’t know why I’m… harsh. Part of me thinks it's because they are always looking at who I have become and are so disappointed. The other part of me thinks that they don’t see me at all…or that they can’t…that there’s nothing more after this. I dunno which feels worse but I know it drives me fucking crazy.” 

He silently reached for your hand, deliberate in his response. “I like to think that the big moments we share with the people we lose are more important than anything after.” He nodded, assuring himself before continuing. “Good or bad, their memory only survives as long as we are thinking of them.” He paused to look toward his wrist, almost out of muscle memory. “Our families may not be here, but even mentioning them proves that they were real. I know my baby girl was real, I can’t fail her by going on like she wasn’t.” He inched closer to you, “If it takes me being sad to know that there was someone I loved here before, I’ll stomach it any day.” 

You nodded slightly. 

“Thanks.” 

A hum resonated from him, and he made his way out of your house. He was elusive as always, and definitely just as attractive..if not more so now. But his words stuck with you. 

That stupid catchphrase from the Fireflies…you’d heard it often. The aftershocks of the group persisted even after they’d slowly dwindled in numbers. When you’re lost in the darkness…

Wiping your eyes, you pulled the covers back a bit more. A lot of time had passed, but for the first time in a while, you didn’t feel like it was ripped from you. 

After a few minutes, the Sun started to rise, heat emanating from your window. You felt the warmth slowly reach your face--closing your eyes. 

For once, you’d look forward to sleep, and even more, the possibility of dreaming.

[pavedinashes-if]

About the previous anon regarding the assault ask, i think they meant that we were unable to defend ourself, atleast thats how i view it. It was something that bothered me too. The fact that running away or getting saved are the only options is kinda upsetting. Im sure there are people who dont want to be saved when they are plenty capable of saving themselves, that scenario felt kinda railroady. No need for the MC to be cqc specialist or anything but there are ways to write aroune it. I wanter to ask why it was that way but there was already too much variables in the story and i didnt want to bother you with something less than half of the readers might come across. Trigger topics are no issue for me but the way i see it is content like this making the mc look weak and require saving will upset people and sour their mood for the rest of the story to come. Its better to give options here rather than walking on eggshells, unless its plot relevant ofc. I hope you dont think im being demanding, you did a great job in the demo but this was one part i found issue in when replaying.

SPOILER!

Hi anon, thanks for sharing your thoughts. I can understand the thought of prefering your mc not to appear weak. It's not about strong or weak... it's about control indeed.

We have to be - unfortunately - realistic here tho. Before the attacker draws the knife, MC can run. If you ever are theatened with a knife, run. And this is something that would be advised by professionals. Even trained professionals would avoid a confrontation with somebody drawing a knife at all cost, because the risk of injury or death is immensly high. Only if not avoidable there would be a "defend / fight back / unarm" option that might eventually work for a trained and experienced (!) person.

This is not a superhero story or overpowered MC. An MC held at knife-point will have to face consequences if acting out.

Guess, in the end this is my choice as an author. And I hope that is okay 😉

I def don't see an MC fighting back due to realistic risk analysis. No person ending up in such a situation should ever be considered weak. Not the tiniest bit. This can happen to anybody (!). Those 5 years of Krav Maga are not the holy grail. Sry.

Btw, the save option came later. This path was meant to be run or die in the first place 😉

Comment:

The next bug fix has a bit of flavour adaption to meet more variations.

[chemicallady]

Heyyy, would you possibly be able to do a Noah Sebastian story that is like a brothers best friend dynamic? I live eat and breathe this stuff lol

I WANNA FEEL LOVE AGAIN

Couple: Noah Sebastian x Fem!Reader

Content Warning: slight mention of sexual intercorse. Nothing too deep, I'm saving it for next Chapters

Summary:  you're a real mess, your life is turning into a living hell, so your brother Matt convinces you to move in with him in LA and start working for the band he's taking care of

A/N: I dont wanna spoil to much in here, because... Well, you' ll see. English is not my native language and no one peer review this ff. It's gonna be a world of fun, I already know it!

Important! I don't know Noah or Matt or any of the real people portrayed un this story. This is fictional!

Enjoy then 😏

Ouch, I've lost myself again

You've always been around, unseen. Having a brother like Matt could be a blessing and a nightmare in equal parts. You were feeded with stories about gigs and musicians while grow up with your older brother, who is dear to you in a way that actually you cant explain. Matt as always been your twin flame even if you are younger than him. You grew up looking at him with a lot of respect and it broke your heart when he left Texas, moving to California. At the time you werent ready for the big change and your brother's friend were still a bit mysterious to you.

You were used to spend as much time as possible in his company, but with this fresh start for him, you just fell into the ordinary. Nothing against your life, by the way; your parents always supporting, best friends ready to drive you to the closer pub and deliver the best night possible, a lovely boyfriend who adored you in any meaning.

You loved the shit out of Shawn. He was your person, the one always there when you were in need. Your high school sweetheart. Maybe he wasnt your first kiss or your first fuck but he was the one who made you feel like it was worthy, living for someone else. The one who pushed you to improve yourself for your own sake, that helped you in finding a job for the local tattoo shop as a piercer when the school was over.

You did everything in your power to be the best girlfriend possible. You decoreted your shared flat in the warmest way possible. You turned down a good scholarship for that college in Montana, pissing your parents and brother for this lost opportunity. You gave up to your dream to be a writer because he had to stay in Texas and take care of his mom. You helped him through the loss, when she die.

But it wasn't enough.

You loved the shit out of Shawn and he loved you in return, but it wasn't enough.

Your relationship suffered a slow, agonizing death with multiple attempt of reanimation. Vacations togheter, a bigger flat, a cat.

Nothing compensate the distance between the two of you and he was the one brave enough to call it for a quit. You knew was gonna happen but it didn't hurt you less. Moving back to your parents, while quitting your job just to avoid to meet him everyday, took you to the bottom. Then the shutdown decided to kick you while you were already down, spending days in bed just listen music or watching anime whitout any chance to go out with your friends or for just a walk.

Everyone was really worried about you. You lose weight and that energy that always marked you.

And you stayed there, drowing in your own misery until Matt decided that enough was enough.

《 Pack your shit, you're moving in with me to LA. You're done making mom and pops that upset.》

The end of fall 2021 signed your rebirth. Matt found a bigger apartment for the two of you and Lucifurr, your vicious black cat which has an obsession in chewing cables and destroy everything paper made. You have always want to leave nearby the ocean and Malibu had a ton of opportunities to offer you. You started a yoga class the same week you moved, in order to make some new friends. Accoding to Matt, there are a lot of things to do around the band he is working with, Bad Omens.

You offer yourself as a merchgirl, but since you're a good writer an even better in tolerate people bullshit (you have to be karmatic, all the teens who came to get a piercing to the shop have always made a scene in front of needles), you could be perfect as a PR/assistant for the band. You remember them barely because someway somehow, these are the guys who steal all the time Matt has. Time that you never get.

You remember this four guys with long hair, basic metalheads, except for the drummer. You remember when you gave him the nostril after a show in 2015, maybe 16, and he took it like a champ whitout complaining. You remember the singer, this slenderman type of guy with beautiful long hair that looks like silk. You've never felt more envy of someone else hair like that. And also the other three guys were nice, especially Vincent. The only one who you can connect to a familiar face because you two got a nice conversation on tattoos when you visited Matt, three years ago.

They are nice.

You've heard stories about them at every phone call.

But still, thieves of precious moments that you want have again in your life again between you and your brother.

All the missing birthday, all the call postponed due to technical issues. He wasn't there to pick up your pieces when Shawn get a rid of you.

And Matt wasn't supposed to, but being selfish, you wish he was there.

But he is now and this is enough to bring the light back to your life. The long talks after dinner, movie nights, everything is back to the normal between you two since you moved and it's restoring.

With this wave of good mood, even if you havent forgotten Shawn yet, you enroll to gym, so you can work out after yoga.

And is in this specific place that you meet Eric.

The first time you caught him lurking at you you were running on the thremill.

There is something familiar in him but still, you dont know anyone in LA. You were the one who actually landed the first conctact with this new alien subject, so introvert to avoid your eyes.

《 Today is hot as hell, right?》

Talking about the weather is the easiest card to play. He smiled a bit shily to you before answering. 《 Don't tell me, I hate how hot is in here. Are you new? I've never seen you around》

《 I just moved in with my brother, actually. 》

《 You're a southie for sure. I like your accent.》

You giggle at his words, while he gets some confidence, passing a hand through this short hair. 《 you got me. You don't sound californian as well》.

《 Maybe because I'm not》. There was a moment in which he seemed to be doubtful, like he changed his mind and he didn't want actually to talk with you. He looked at you with a weird expression, like he realised something was off. 《 What's your name?》, he asked then, almost suspicious.

And then you lied. You rarely give your real name to strangers. A self defence mechanism for girls. 《 Vanessa. You?》

He looked more relaxed, 《 Eric.》

《 Nice to meet you Eric... Do you know a nice bar around? 》

《 Maybe I know a place 》 he reflected, smiling a bit malicious. He was definitely flirting. 《 Can offer you a beer or something? Just to welcome you in town.》

You are not ready for a new story yet, but after almost a year after you broke up with Shawn, you needed at least some human conctact. Eric was nice with you since the beginning. He invited you to this dive bar after the gym a couple of times, not far from your place. He paid for you a couple of cocktails while having a real nice Conversation. A superficial one, about the tattoos that covered him. About living in LA. You mentioned your brother a couple of times and he talked about his roomates and all the crazy things they have done during the pandemic.

He told you he is a Producer and you told him you're still unemployed.

One way or another, he got closer to you in a matter of days. And when he kissed you, you obliged and kiss him back. One thing leaded to another and the two of you ended fucking in the back of his SUV. And oh boy... you needed it so much. It was a quickie, but he seemed to be promising. His long fingers stimulated you untill you cried out for pleasure. His mounth divoured you inch by inch. And his cock....

He knew how to use it, let's say that.

After, he gave you his number and the two of you planned to see each other by the end of the week, at the gym, after your yoga class and his class of jujitsu....

The morning after you're fresh and relaxed like you weren't in months. Matt tends to be overprotective so you didn't told him about Eric while you were having breakfast. You need to know this guys deeply before accept that you know have a situationship. And your brother doesn't need to know about you screacting you itchies.

He has a hot temper when someone looks at his dear little sis.

After breakfast you got ready to meet the band again after almost three years.

《 I can't believe Vincent quitted. He was the nicest.》

Matt sighs while driving to the guys' house, mentally focused on the traffic. 《 youll see him when we'll be in Virginia, don't worry. 》

Your eyes slip on streets and houses, wards and parks but you still feel like You're in a new country. You don't know how much it will take to get used to California.

《 here we are》 , Matt says, parking. 《 let's refresh the rules.》

《 Oh c'mon, I'm not twelve anymore》

《 y/n 》

《 alright! I don't have to embarrass you while you're free to be mean on me. I don't have to embarrass myself talking shit just because I'm nervous and if the music sucks, I can't tell your precious Noah.》

《 You can do better but, more or less, that's it. Lets go. I need another coffe and maybe something sweet before start to film the music video. 》

It's so weird filming inside a house and not in a proper set but all this low budget bullshit are quite the normal for small bands, you think.

You have to be their assistant and eventually a PR- so Matt can stop to bitching on twitter all the time- and you know nothing about bands.

According to Matt, you're going to learn quick.

According to Matt. You know that he picked you up for the job so he can force you to write what he wants.

And continuing to bitch around through you.

The guitar player greets you at the door and introduces himself again as Jolly. The rest of the guys minus Noah are in the garage. It's marvelous how Orie, one of the guys who lives here, a director, reorganize the space with tubes and flashlight.

《 What's the name of the song, again? 》 you ask to Nick Folio, whos already youre favorite.

《 Artifical Suicide》 it's the answer, while he takes his place back behind the drums.

《So emo》 it's your honest observation that makes him laught. Matt looks at you in a way that if he could, you would be incinerated where you're standing. You're already embarrassing him.

Nice.

You regret nothing.

It's a lil sister job to make her brother in troubles, that's what pops always says.

Mike brings you a coffe that you accept with a smile, than tells everyone the news about the singer that is still not here.

A diva, of course. That's your first thought. Every singer is a natural diva.

《 He is still looking for the glove.》

《 He would lost his head if it wasn't attacked to his neck》 , a solid comment arrives from Ruffilo, immediatly followed by an annoyed reply from behind you.

��� I can ear you motherfucker. You are- what the fuck?》

You turn in time to face the famous singer and almost choke with the coffe.

《 Yo Noah, do you remember my sister, y/n?》

You see Noah turning pale for a second while trying to say something in return.

You're also speechless for a second, before putting your shit togheter so Matt wont finds out in the first five minutes. 《 Howdy! You... you cut your hair. Nice. I didn't know》

You didn't.

That's why was so easy for Noah to be Eric for almost a week. For a hook up with you. His best friend sister.

....Splendid.

You're fucked.

[evil-marco]

welcome to my blog. here i bitch about stupid people. come one, come all.

short overview: hey i'm marco. im a person with dissociative identity disorder. i use any pronouns, and i'm an adult. if you don't like me, block me! it's not my job to be internet friendly. it's your job to police your internet consumption. peace and love. (i know this sounds sarcastic but i'm being /srs. if you do not like the content tumblr is showing you, curate it. there's no use getting offended over it, or upset. either listen & learn or move on. i genuinely don't care which.)

as mentioned before, i'm marco (or, if you want, apple (not orange (which is a surprise considering the theme i chose))). i have DID. alters will reveal themselves if they want to. as an overview, i have 7-8. i dont believe in emoji signoffs—i have a name and i will use it.

always feel free to send asks about DID or system shit. i love correcting misinformation—if you need help finding good resources, i'm majoring in english and would love to help you find credible ones. i am also down to debate syscourse at any point. don't straight up call me a slur though you will just get clowned on.

i am like your friendly neighborhood spiderman except i'm not friendly or spiderman and instead just really don't like people faking dissociative disorders. that's about it.

no DNI because that's cringe & not how real life works, but if you believe in the following and feel strongly about it, you might want to block me. i also feel strongly about it and i guarantee you i'm more stubborn:

₊　endo systems. tulpa systems. any system that is not disordered. any of that "mixed origins" bullshit. i think you guys should get back into kinning.

₊　people who think you can be a completely binary man and a lesbian. [insert loud incorrect buzzer here]

₊　similarly, people who think you can be a completely binary woman and be mlm [insert equally loud incorrect buzzer here]

₊　those people who take shipping too seriously. do not tell me to kms because i don't ship your favs.

₊　systems who think systems should get special treatment for the sake of special treatment. you do not need pluralkit in every server ever. shut up

₊　people who refuse to debate your beliefs. you are stagnant. one day the world will move on without you and you will be the reason why.

₊　if you're being nsfw in my notifs i'll block you. idc about your blog (so feel free to interact/like/reblog with a sfw caption) but if i have to see it i will avoid it! much love to the nsfw bloggers but not my cup of tea

₊　generally just have common sense and we'll get along!

inbox / askbox are open ! i love education & debates, and will absolutely explain my perspective most things.

[rosearcanaeum]

(Ten) people I'd like to know better

Tagged by: @screechingfromthevoid <3

Last song: Far From Me by Chase Noseworthy is just on repeat. Sad boy Vax and perfect for my range!

Favorite color: it really depends on context honestly. But the most general is soft pink.

Last book: 😅 I've been struggling through Nein Eyes of Lucien for a while.... more honestly its Call of the Netherdeep and Explorers Guide to Wildemount. I truely read far more fanfic than anything else.

Last movie: I watched Night at the Museum for the first time this week. It was waaaaaay better than I ever imagined. I knew it was good and funny. It was also incredibly sincere and I can't get enough of that.

Last show: speaking of sincere, I'm about halfway through Frieren: beyond journey's end. And holy shit! I have never seen any media with a character who views and interacts with death the way i do. Its pretty heavy as shows go but its trustworthy. (I have a hard time with new stuff most of the time. Cr is one exception and this is too apparently)

Sweet/spicy/savory: no joke I've eaten salt before lol. But i prefer combos or all 3. Sweet spicy is underrated.

Relationship status: I live with my queer platonic partner. Its still just buckwild to me. As a kid i hated the idea of living with a partner cuz i didnt want so many aspects of what i was told that looked like. But hey guess what, y'all can decide what your relationships look like. We have separate rooms, are not sexually involved, rarely even touch tbh. And we love each other very much and want to grow old together in a house with cats.

They're touch averse and I'm sensory seeking. My fun Sunday night (out dancing) is their nightmare. But because we are who we are and how we understand and communicate in our relationship we rely on each other for only things that are available. I'll tell them all the dumb shit i see and do on Grindr and we'll sit on the couch and knit together.

Also my brain nearly explodes everytime I realize not only do we do couple stuff, we have couple friends we do couple stuff with. 18 year old me would have never believed you if you told them.

Last thing I looked up: I looked up the caffeine content of the thai tea concentrate I got my partner to see if i could try it. And shockingly i should be able to. Still gonna eat first and be careful though.

Current obsession: I'm pretty spread out rn, unusually. Ive got a sweater im excited about. And I'm on my 3rd attempt at a dorym water bottle sleeve I'm designing. This one should work now. Honestly dorym is probably no. 1 on my list. I shipped that back in exu, along with a bunch of stuff cuz I'm a delightful multishipper. So i feel particularly excited about dorym finally taking off. But also that while dorian was always looking to orym if anything else had come along he was there for the ride. I love robbie so so much. He is such a good character storyteller!

Looking forward to: today im hanging with 2 friends im usually in a larger group with so thats gonna be fun. Looking forward to baking off the beef wellingtons i made for my partner for xmas. And im looking forward to being able to work full time again in the new year. Ive been on part time for health reasons and stayed because i was spending hours on the phone fighting for insurance coverage. Now that both a done i can work more. I love my job and its a particular kind of boredom that i get when i cant work. Lol speaking of, im looking forward to the holidays being over. The office closures normally screw us but now im only working thurs fri for the next 2 weeks and I'll have try really hard to keep busy enough. At least my partner has 2 of the days off with me!

No pressure tags; not sure I can get to 10 and please dont feel obligated but I'd love to see yours (if you havent already. Ive been avoiding spoilers a lot recently so may not have seen it): @vigilante-apologist @standbyyourmantis @soedblackchaos @forestthechonkykitty @corrrvid @local-redhead-bookworm and luddles looks like you did already do this.

Thats all i got. If you see this and want to do it, consider yourself tagged!

[anglebunnie]

Hihihi !!! ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚⊹

My name is Angel! It's the name I use online in and out of kink. I have 0 intentions of ever sharing my IRL name or posting photos of myself publically. I'm 20 FTM. I've been on T for soon to be 3 years and will (hopefully if all works out right) have top surgery in 2027 and bottom surgery a few years after that. IRL I'm a passing man and mostly stealth. I'm probably autistic and have some sort of anxiety disorder. Everything you see on this blog is exclusively fantasy and 99% of it I would not be willing to do IRL with anyone. This is ALL FANTASY AND FICTION!!

READ THIS BEFORE INTERACTING WITH ME

Important information will be highlighted in blue and red for those of you who need sparknotes

I consider myself generally m4fem, I don't really like to lable my sexuality, to me gender and sexualty are very very fluid, but typically I find myself attracted to femininity, but not always! When I'm indulging in my detrans kink I find myself more attracted to masculinity, and obviously that's not a strict thing.

I am somewhere on the asexual spectrum and generally avoid engage sexually with people who I don't know. If you want to engage sexually with me please start with a "hello!" And a nice little SFW chat first. As fun as it is to pretend to be a little bunny rapetoy, I am still a person💔

I am not looking for a partner! As fun as it is to roleplay and post about wanting a daddy or mommy, and as lovely as I'm sure yall are, I'm not looking for a partner on Tumblr. I'm down to roleplay and chat with yall, fantasize, maybe even become friends, but as of right now the only places I'm looking for love is Hinge and real life out in the wild. (That being said if your a billionaire willing to pay for my college, fund my transition, and get me the fuck out of America 👀)

This is all just a fantasy and something fun to indulge it, I don't genuinely ever see myself detransitioning or have a desire to detransition, I just get off on the humiliation of it and the loss of agency. Forced feminization falls under my cnc kink, and if I was a Cis man I would still have a forced fem kink <3

I'll indulge in the medical aspect on occasion (restricting HRT, fantasies about getting a surprise boob job instead of top surgery, etc) but generally I'm less interested in the idea of medically detransitioning and more interested in being made to wear girly clothes and being sexually degraded.

I exclusively top IRL, I do not and will never indulge in bottoming, it is uncomfortable for me physically and mentally. That being said it's still very fun to fantasize about, just not to do!

I am a switch, but generally more submissive. I have a non detrans kink blog, but I don't really plan on sharing it since it's mostly reposts. The content is honestly pretty similar to what I plan to post on here just more geared towards my love of being dominated by women and with a bit less cnc/detrans stuff.

I will not follow you back! Not because i dont want to talk to you lovely people but this is a side blog. If you want to chat im happy to do so through asks and DMs if you are resepctful!

Although I do have a forced fem kink and do think being degraded by being forcibly feminized is hot, I am still very much a feminist! I don't equate femininity to humiliation, it's more about control and being turned into what my partner wants me to be/being turned into the opposite of what I am. I understand why some people and especially women, are put off about forced fem/sissy kinks and I do think the forced detrans kink falls into that category, I'm not sure if there's an "ethical" way to get off to forced them stuff, but I do want to let it be known that I deeply respect women, femininity, and there is nothing at all inherently sexual or wrong about it

Please also respect other people’s limits and practice safe kink. If someone is making you uncomfortable in any way it’s probably a red flag. We only practice safe consensual kink here. All of the content here is fantasy and should be contained within a safe kink setting and peoples individual limits. Boundaries and aftercare are very important and should be respected.

What you will find on my blog

Misgendering

Cnc

Forced feminization

Petplay

Somewhat ddlg/mdlg I guess?

Humiliation & degredation

Manipulation

Breeding

Lactation

Ocassional monsterfucking

What you won't find on my blog (hard limits)

Blood/gore/death

Scat/vomit

Bioessentialism

Ana/feederism/anything to do with food

Birthing

There are more kinks and stuff and I'll probably add them as I think of them but for now we can call that the list!

If you are cishet men or a lesbian you can stay and interact but don't talk to me <3. Cishet women you are on THIN ice.

IF YOU ARE MAGA/A TRUMP VOTER, A MINOR, TRANSPHOBIC, A TERF, OR ANY OTHER KIND OF BIGOT GET THE FUCK OFF MY BLOG! THIS IS NOT FOR YOU! I WILL BLOCK YOU! DNI!

[jams-sims]

I avoided most of the mismag discourse back during the first season. Idk if people are bored or what and that why im seeing a lot more of it. But it so fucking annoying to see people bring up racism in mismags. Then point at Brendan as the vocal point or that he over shadows the rest of the cast.

As someone who is black in nerd spaces please stop trying to talk about the racism that is not in mismags (the way you think it is). Your trying to stand in front of us to- idk save us? When half the cast is POC. YOU have one white man who spends 90% of his time being the guy who wants his friends to be happy and promp up characters like Jammer, Sam and K.

If your point is that everyone talks about Evan. Damn I'm not surpised its not like it happens in every show where their mostly POC cast and the single ONE white character everyone focus on. Im glad you can finally join the rest of your POC peers in the fucking class room. Because we been talked about this shit for forever. And on my end, I just roll my eyes and keep it pushing. I can't be bothered to care anymore.

Strawman white nerd, you can talk about all the other characters in the serise. This isnt a POC job to have to tell you how great Jammer, Sam or K is. An if you really wanna get real about, everyone is mostly talking about K and Evan. The 2 prominent black characters I have to hunt down fan content for no one talks about. Again this isn't new, its always been like this. But it is not that deep when it comes to Mismags, the narrative of the story is- THEY WERENT SUPPOSED TO BE PICKED!

They are undesireables, they dont fit in but the whole point is that they are going to break that. Make room for themsleves- the literal racism IS the fact the wizard school didnt want black kids and weird queer kids coming to their school. Mmm almost like it making a comment about the source materal that this game comes from. That now we have more eps we can explore proper and make it truly its own thing. I gueds thats to hard to grasp.

[stychu-stych]

hello,

I was wondering how did you go about selling stuff on conventions? (also im asking from a polish perspective cause i know you are from here and most vidoes on the matter are from american perspective) how did you went about pricing? what were the first conventions you went to sell to? how do you go about stocking up? is there any conventions that you recommend avoiding? anything you could share

thank you for your time, even if you dont answer

That's so interesting question! I have to admit that most of the videos about being a vendor doesn't work for me JDBDJDH unfortunately there's tons of cute content with people talking about their super inspiring art journey that is just a content, and I'm talking about videos from all over the world. Also don't get me wrong, those videos still can be super enjoyable, but you have to be aware that most of them are not real. I learned much more on my mistakes than on videos on yt or tiktok and I can tell that being a vendor isn't really different from working in a casual shop (the main difference is that you're your own boss, manager and employee). Also I want to clarify that everything below is just my own experience which may be different from other people.

So basically the store MangoMilkStudio was created by my fiancée about 6 or 7 years ago. I helped her a little, tried to open my own online shop as well but it quickly turned out that we prefer to work under the one name and I decided to start adding stuff on, at that moment, our common store.

Our first convention (that doesn't exist anymore) was in Wrocław in 2019 if I remember correctly. It was a barter-like transaction, we made some illustrations in exchange for the booth. We didn't earn much but we both had different jobs at that time and we saw making merch as some kind of a hobby.

If it comes to being a vendor and what cons I recommend- it depends on where you live, how much money do you want to spend on sleeping and transportation, how much on a booth, what kind of con you're interested in. The good thing about Poland is that we have SO MANY cons so you can pick whatever suits you best. I don't want to point out specific conventions, because I know that some of cons work for us but don't work for someone else and vice versa. I think the best way of deciding which con you want to attend is just applying and then consider whether it's worth it after the con is over.

The one but very important mistake that people usually do on their first conventions is that they're expecting to earn a loooot of money and they are disappointed when it doesn't happen. Being a vendor, even as a small business artist, is still a work related to trade and that means you have to put a lot of money in your business before you'll start to earn money, you have to create your own base of customers, you have to know how to talk to the client, how to talk not only about fandom stuff but also about your own products, how to arrange your table so all the products are visible for a client etc. It works on the basis of trial and error and can take a lot of time and effort.

About the prices - if you don't know how to price your product, you should try to check other vendors' price lists and then analyze if that price sufficiently covers your production costs (yes, including your time and effort). And for a love of god DON'T lower your prices too much because of the competition. It never works and it only spoils the market.

After each convention we try to save some money for the next con but also for a restock (and taxes JDBSJSH""" yeah, we unfortunately have huge taxes). If it goes to restocking items like keychains or anything that is acrylic, Poland doesn't really have much good manufactures unfortunately (I hope this will change in the future) so we usually buy stuff in China. I'm not complaining, products are well made, people are super friendly, the only things that can be exhausting are - tariffs, super expensive shipping and long time waiting for a package. So be prepared with some extra money and make sure you won't place an order a week before convention.

Few more tips:

- don't restock merch in large quantities if you don't know if people would buy it. I did it with my Deltarune stickers, people stopped to buy them and I still have tons of them hidden somewhere dhdbdh

- home printers and plotters are great for making things like TY cards, packaging, single stickers but I recommend to find good printing house or manufacturer. It's just more cost-effective in terms of time, materials and nerves. Also if you make a mistake it's on your own, if manufacturer makes a mistake you can ask for a remake

- most people at cons are super cute and friendly but some of them can be weird as well, don't be afraid to set your boundaries

- keep your cash close to you

- don't eat food that was offered to you by someone you don't know (even if that person looks like con helper)

- write down orgs' phone numbers just in case

- remember to eat and drink a lot of water

At the end I want to say that it's hard to make a living from just one artistic job. We have an online store, we're vendors at cons, I make tattoos, commissions (from time to time), now I'm trying my best on patreon. Most of the people I know, that are vendors as well, have a "normal" job. So don't feel bad if you want to start earning money with your art but you still have to work in a second job

[he4rts-f0r-evang3line]

new year's hangover☆

lil drabble where you befriend ghost at the tf141 new year's party... what can possibly go wrong?

content: drunkness, socially anxious-ish reader, ghost being ghost, passing out and hickeys.

author's note: UHHH HAI IM BACK?!?!? icl im kinda hating myself because im posting a drabble instead of a full work.... am sorry.. mi bad mi bad... also im waiting for friday for new invincible content because the brainrot is REALLL

also pls pretend i posted this on new year's eve... HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YALL BTWWWWW

shotout to @unabashedcroissanttreefan bc i want to make her bitter /hj, and to @michelleart8 ! <3

anyway enjoy and pls reblog

wc: 1836

"will you be coming at the new year's party tonight?" price asked as he noticed you filling some paperwork in the common room.

"i dont think so" you sigh, "im not that much of a social person, and i still have a lot of paperwork to fill in,let alone medical files."

"are you sure?" price asked, worried you might overwork yourself, but then an idea suddenly came to his mind. "i heard the lieutenant will be there as well, rumors have it you have a crush on him, so it'd be a good opportunity to actually talk to him, instead of just- avoiding him like you do."

the thought of captain price having noticed you had a crush on ghost sent a bright blush to your cheeks, but you waved those thoughts away.

"even if he was here, that doesn't mean i stand a chance with him" you reply, losing focus on your paperwork, now that the lieutenant was mentioned. "we barely talk anyway, and he seems to hate me so..."

"he seems to hate everyone" price chuckled, "dont take it personally. did the fact that he will be there change your mind?"

"i dont know" you sigh, but your little smile was betraying you. "it will depend on whether i have finished filling those files. at what time will it start?"

"around 7!" price replied with a subtle smile, feeling like he convinced you to come. "oh,and, you can come in a casual outfit, no need to pull up the formal uniform", he winked and left.

the few hours that separated you from the awaited party came, and all of a sudden a sudden peak of anxiety invaded you.

what if everyone made fun of your awful social skills? what if you didnt dress well enough?

your overthinking stopped as you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket; surprisingly enough, it was a text from price.

are you coming? ghost is here 👀

you chuckled as you put on a comfy sweater, and headed to the common room.

"you came!!" price greeted you, smiling brightly at you. "make yourself at ease, go get yourself something to drink, and who knows? maybe alcohol can help you make a move on our lovely lieutenant" he chuckled, before handing you a cup of alcohol.

"do you... want to get me drunk so i could get rid of my social anxiety?" you asked price, raising an eyebrow.

"maybe" he chuckled, already sounding drunk, "is it working?"

"not reall- ouch"

you blushed brightly as you noticed ghost was the one who stumbled into you.

"oi," he said, sounding slightly drunk as well, "im sorry. must've lost my balance, probably drank too much already. you're y/n, right?"

"y-yes," you nod, still not over the interaction, praying he didn't notice the bright blush on your cheeks, "why?"

"because..." he tries to articulate, and nearly fell on the floor, "ive been meaning to tell you... you're doing a great ass good job... dont let my mean words convince you otherwise, k?"

"oh-" you said, taken aback by this sudden demonstration of kindness, your heart melting. "thank you lieutenant..?"

the evening went on, until the cheerful "happy new year!!!" resonated in the walls of the tf141's buildings, everyone happy to finally greet the new year.

the party then came to an end, and so you decided to stay a little longer to help clean the room. once you got done, and got ready to head back to your quarters, you noticed an odd figure.

was ghost... asleep? he sure seemed to. he probably passed out due to all the alcohol he had drank, and you couldn't blame him.

that's how he somehow ended in your quarters - and if you were to be honest, carrying a man as massive as him was NOT an easy thing, but you somehow managed to. you tried your best to put him in a comfortable position on your couch, but bringing him here was already kind enough, wasn't it? so you just left him laying down on the floor, covering his massive frame with a blanket, and put a pillow under his head.

"this sure was a strange new year's day" you thought out loud, "happy new year lieutenant"

just in case something happened to ghost, you decided pull an all nighter (?), and you were right to, well at least, soft of.

in the middle of the night, ghost woke up, seemingly not over his hangover.

"i'll tell you what, y/n, ive always been in love with you." he mumbled, barely able to stand.

your heart dropped at this confession, but you had to stay lucid: he couldn't possibly mean it, it had to be the alcohol, right? that would make no sense if he was in love with you.

but you couldn't help to secretely wish what he was saying was true, after all you know the saying: drunk words are sober thoughts, and now you really hoped the saying was true there.

"lieutenant,you're drunk, you should go back to sle-"

he interrupted you by kissing you, first on the lips, and then moved on to your neck, leaving a little trail of hickeys here and there.

you gave in the kiss, you knew it was wrong, but it felt so good, but quickly waved those thoughts off: it was wrong in any way. he was your superior, and drunk, you couldn't abuse his drunken state like that.

but the feel of his lips on yours sure felt like heaven...

as if nothing happened, he smirked softly as he pulled out of the kiss, and resumed his peaceful slumber on your floor.

however, the next morning was nothing like that.

"looks like someone had fun last night" ghost grumbled as he noticed your many hickeys. "what the fuck am i doing here? and where even is here, and did you poison me? why is my head pounding?" he asked, back to his usual stern self, and you would actually be surprised if he didnt.

"youre in my quarters" you reply as you handed him a cup of anti hangover tea. "i brought you here because we were the only two remaining at the party, and you passed out. and hum... about the hickeys, how much do you remember from last night?" you ask as you look away, embarassed at the thought of last night's passionate kiss.

"i dont remember shit, why?" he asked, sounding more annoyed than mean.

"okay i..." (you sigh) "promise not to get mad at me if i tell you?" (he shakes his head, annoyed) "okay, so... you confessed yesterday." you blurt out, "but that is not all." (you gulp.) "we also kissed and... you gave me those hickeys."

"oh." he said blankly, and you could feel the blush in his voice, despite his mask.

"yeah.." you chuckled awkwardly, not daring to look at him, "but i have one question though. were you honest when you said you... 'always have been in love with me?"

your heartbeat quickened as you waited for his answer, but you had to know.

"would it be weird if i said yes..?" he asked, unable to look at your eyes, and your heart nearly missed a beat. "i mean, youre always doing what youre told to despite the fact that i treat you like shit and... i don't know, i guess that made me develop a kind of soft spot for you... do you happen to feel the same way..?" he asked, and you could feel the vulnerability in his voice.

"i- i think i do..?" you replied, both confused and relieved. "i mean, i always thought you hated me but.. this feels a bit rushed. can we do it again?"

"okay" he nodded, "how does 'hello, my name is simon riley, known as ghost, lieutenant from the task force 141, and i am in love with the wonderful y/n' sounds?" ghost chuckled with a soft smile, loving at you with loving eyes.

"much better" you reply with a soft smile, butterflies fluttering in your stomach, way better.

later on that day, when you and ghost headed to the briefing room hand in hand, price couldn't help but let out a small laugh.

"see? seems like alcohol can do wonders" he whispered, and it made you let out a small chuckle as well.