#like ma’am take a wild guess at what we were doing and leave me tf alone 😭

[peachlit]

i need to let my mom know i’m 24 now and don’t need or want her tracking my location

[asterekmess]

S3A - E1

Okay, instead of making like massive reblogs of thoughts as I have them for the episodes, I’m gonna just make a massive bullet point list that I’ll add to throughout the episode, so you get One post per episode instead of “Like all nine million of them.”

I put Read-More’s because I care.

Thoughts (of which I have far too many):

I’m in the first ten seconds of the fuckin episode. Why the fuck is Braeden electrocuting Isaac? Like, look, I wanna like Braeden. I have issues with her entire moral system, but I still wanna like her cus’ she saves Isaac. But...how am I supposed to do that when the literal first thing she does is electrocute my boy??? He’s knocked out, not DEAD (not that that’s how shocking someone’s heart even Works) and it’s not like she needs to trigger the healing process. He’s already got Gaping slash wounds on his chest. He’s hurt enough. ALSO. “Be quiet”?? R U Serious? You’re electrocuting him. YOU try being quiet with fucking jumper cables on your chest.

The CGI...is so bad. Oh my god. What the absolute fuck. it looks like Sharkboy & Lavagirl. And why aren’t Ethan & Aiden’s claws doing anything to the bike?

I AM CONFUSION. If the twins don’t have to take their pants off to do the Transformers shit, why do they have to take off their shirts? Can...can I just skip that? Make the big bad werewolf wear an ugly hybrid of two of their stupid ass sweaters? Or do Ethan and Aiden really just like being shirtless that much? (I wouldn’t put it past them)

What is with Braeden and the electricity?

The writing in this show, what the fuck? “I thought I told you to hold on” EXCUSE ME, ma’am. He literally just passed out. His bad I guess.

Guess who has to add the anti-scott tag to this now? Anyway, I hate that Allison’s bit in the intro is her kissing Scott and then drawing the bow. Like, they’re broken up. They don’t get together in this season. Why are they kissing in the intro? That had to have Totally pissed off Scallison fans.

There’s my boy, holding up lizard tattoo designs. Pls tell me he took a pic and sent it to Jackson with the caption “It’s YOU.” Like, yes, way too soon, but man it’s fuckin funny.

This tattoo artist is a good-ass salesman. However, p-sure he’s not a good-ass artist if he had to wrap Scott’s arm up That badly. Like...they have stuff for that. Fuck, the one I got on my ankle, they used SaranWrap and Tape. Just needs to be kept out of the open air for a bit. You don’t need like eight layers of gauze. I do feel for Scott tho. That tat probably cost him like $50-75 before the tip. Oof.

Eyyy, time to be salty. Ya’ll know I love Allison, but does it get any more clear that she totally bailed on everyone after the warehouse? She went to France! She doesn’t even know what happened to Jackson after he got cured. ALSO. Lydia says “Derek taught him the werewolf 101.” Not Scott. Derek. XP

Lydia, honey, leave Allison alone. If she doesn’t want to go on the double date, go alone and make it an orgy. Fun, right? Wait, no. Don’t. You’re 16. Don’t do that!

When exactly did they “agree to give each other the summer”? She said “I’m breaking up with you.” he said “I’ll wait” and then she cried into her dad’s arms. Like...why didn’t we get to see this apparently incredibly important conversation? (maybe because it didn’t happen??)

I fucking LOVE the “I’m just gonna say hi. HEYYYYY! You know....they probably didn’t see us.”

The most horrific thing about that moment was the bad CGI.

I WANNA POINT OUT how cute it is (in a like, sad way cus’ she’s terrified) that Lydia is close enough to Stiles now that she immediately goes for his side and they like insta connect with the eye contact. Not in like a Stydia way, but like, they’re close. she trusts him and goes to him when she’s scared, even though he’s human and you’d wonder if she shouldn’t go to Scott instead, since he’s the werewolf.

SCOTT WHY ARE YOU TOUCHING THE DEAD DEER. Your ability to smell chemosignals/sense emotions has nothing to do with touching. Stop poking the dead animal.

Wait, WHY is there a full moon in that shot? The full moon isn’t for like a week! I COUNTED.

...what? Why the fuck does Braeden think Scott’s an Alpha? Why tho? Like, seriously? WHY? He’s not an Alpha yet. Nowhere near it. And if she knows bc Deaton told her (i think he was the one who hired her) then shouldn’t she know he isn’t one yet? IF SHE KNOWS that she can tell Melissa abt werewolves, WHY doesn’t she know that Scott’s Melissa’s son? Where is the LOGIC?

Scott’s morning routine is giving me Legally Blonde vibes. ~my perrrfectt dayyy, nothing standing in my wayyy~

I can’t tell. did Allison get highlights, or straight up dye her hair brown?

This sweet moment between her and her dad. Yes. Pls.

I will admit, I like getting to see each of their mornings.

Lydia...who are you fucking? Honey, you’re sixteen. Why isn’t whoever the fuck is in bed with you also getting ready for school? What.....the fuck?

Completely different Beacon Hills High School set. I really can’t blame the writers for that.

Wtf Davis? You list Erica and Boyd as being 17...since when? They’re supposed to be entering their Junior Year of high school. They would be 16 GOING ON 17. ANd what the hell do you mean Erica’s birthday is August 16th? She said in the last season that she’d “Just turned 16 a month ago” that was Spring semester. ???? Come on, guys. Seriously. Writing 101, getting to know your characters. I don’t know anyone writing a novel who doesn’t know the exact birthday of their characters. Plus, they cut 2 in. from Gage Golightly’s actual height, while adding an inch to Sinqua’s (according to google, which isn’t always reliable) Whatever. Boooooo.

Uh...that principal was threatened by the Argents. Victoria herself promised to torture him if he didn’t resign. Why does he look so surprised by the fucking sword in his office? For that matter, why is he at the school at all? He KNOWS the Argents attacked him. This should cause problems!

Honestly, Lydia, I love you. Like, go for it. Nothing wrong with not wanting to date and just wanting to have fun. My issues stem from YOU BEING 16. Yes, teenagers have sex. But this is ridiculous. Why is there so much sexualization? I knew a grand total of like....two teenagers who had sex at 16? and like one who did at 15 (which they say in canon she and Jackson were banging before her birthday). Like, it’s not nearly as common as y’all are making it out to be. Knock it off.

WHEN DID MELISSA MEET ISAAC PROPERLY? WHEN did that HAPPEN?

....so why didn’t Derek answer the phone? They literally never explain? He shows up, so...why didn’t he answer?

I’m SO InCredibly Disturbed by Jennifer having everyone’s phone numbers. HOW? In What Way is that REMOTELY appropriate? WHY did no one question it? Why didn’t STILES or LYDIA question it?

So tiny, bugs me so much. He didn’t turn his phone off. He turned his screen off...is it that hard to have him do the right one?

uhhh. Werewolves can smell other werewolves. Wanna tell me why Isaac can’t tell a werewolf just walked in the room? An ALPHA no less?

why TF are Kali’s iris’ and pupils so fucking massive?

So...what was the deal with the birds? Don’t they say later that Jennifer like summoned them? So they aren’t from the Alpha pack scaring animals? And also, how would the Alpha pack be scaring animals if they’re like, in the middle of town? They said in S1 that “wild animal sightings are up” like what 75% or something? “As though something is scaring them out” but that made sense, bc we knew Peter was running around in his full-shift (it’s a fucking full shift, it’s just fucked up) in the woods. But these Alphas aren’t, they’re integrating. So is it Jennifer that the animals are afraid of? Like, does she have sPoOkY aura or something?

More bad CGI.

WHy is no one responding to the woman stumbling around in nothing but a hospital gown?

ONCE AGAIN. Werewolves can Sense Werewolves. SCOTT you sensed Isaac in a BOYS LOCKER ROOM. DUKE IS RIGHT THERE. WHT THE FUCK?

angry smoker doctor  “Why don’t you wheel this joker out of here?” “I’m gonna go smoke” Grrr

Sir. clearly your mask wasn’t tied on appropriately. it shouldn’t just Fall Off when you touch it. there are Protocols! STOP THE SPREAD. also, someone wanna tell me why none of these alphas can keep their claws in? A lil flashy flashy red eye would’ve done the trick just fine.

Okay no, seriously what the FUCK is up with these contacts, you guys? THEY”RE MASSIVE???

Ugh, can I just *swoons* “I’m an Alpha!” slice “So am I.” That is just so fucking smooth. Woo. I feel so safe ohmygod. PLUS. Derek KNOWS Ennis. I can’t imagine how satisfying that had to be.

Uh, Derek, honey. You’re Isaac’s legal guardian. You can just Sign Him Out of the hospital. With clothes and everything. What are you doing?

Honey, what do you mean the county took it over? If they were gonna do that they’d have done it six fucking years ago. Unless you gave it to them, it’s still yours? I did the research. Like HOURS of it.

What do you MEAN there’s a magic healing herb that helps with Alpha wounds? Since when do Alpha wounds need extra healing, I thought they just took a lil longer? ALSO why is it growing INSIDE your house???? SCOTT. Isaac is fucking UNCONSCIOUS. Can your tattoo fucking WAIT A MINUTE?

I have so many questions. WHY does Braeden know who Allison is? If Lydia’s immune to magic, WHY is Braeden able to bruise her? WHY can Braeden DO magic? and WHY is Chris allowed to take Lydia out of school?

ALLISON you had Geometry LAST YEAR why are you holding a GEOMETRY BOOK??

ohhhhmygod, Derek. Derek. DEREK. Your eyes are pretty on a normal day. That little Blink and ruby reds thing? Ohmygod. I just. I wanna take a picture and just stare at it BUT. how tf does this whole red eye thing work? You can see in the dark....but now you also have x-ray vision? You know, I could believe it was thermal vision...maybe? If Scott was still healing for some reason maybe the tattoo would be brighter? Otherwise I have no idea what is going on.

BUT SCOTT”S NOT 18??? He’s Still fucking 16, or even 17, but not 18. WTF? He needs parental consent in the first place (i should’ve mentioned this in the other note abt the tattoo)

uhh...seriously? When someone breaks up with you and tells you not to talk to them anymore...why do you need a reward for doing as they asked? Like, yeah, you’re sad, I feel that. But making it a ‘reward’ sounds kinda weird. You know what makes it really easy not to text the ex that doesn’t wanna talk to you? Delete her number.

WHY THE BLOWTORCH? SOMEONE WANNA EXPLAIN? Peter’s not covered in tattoo from when he was literally burned alive, why the FUCK would a blowtorch create a black tattoo on Scott’s skin?

DEREK. HONEY. Why would Stiles be able to hold Scott still??? Scott’s a werewolf.

All this bullshit to explain away Posey’s tattoo that he got. Like, damn dude, we all like tattoos, but you have a job that needs bare arms on the regular. That was kinda rude.

Where did braeden get clothes? I forgot to ask.

uhhhh. Ephemeral might technically work in that sentence, but that’s still really awkward.

WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DESTROY HIS DOOR? YOU FUCKING ASSHAT. And WHY the instant fucking grr face? “why’d you paint the door?” uhh, leave him alone? He can do what he wants? It’s his house? Also, don’t get all fucking rude about the alpha pack. He told you it was a rival pack.

KALI. PUT SOME FUCKING SHOES ON. JESUS.

Why exactly does Scott see the symbol and INSTANTLY put together that it’s got anything to do with the Alphas or the animal attacks? Where is the logic jump there?

What exactly was the POINT of popping your claws if you were gonna kick her in the face???

UH, Melissa? Why didn’t you tell Scott that there was a whole other person with Isaac?

What is with the face touching, Duke? I’ve never known a blind person who actually wanted to rub their hands on my face to ‘find out what i look like?’

Really not a fan of all these weird jumps and camera angles with the awkward reflecting.

WOah WOah. Allison gets to PAINT her APARTMENT? Wtf kinda BULlshit is that? My landlord won’t let me do that. Rude.

I know they’re imprisoned and it sucks, but they’ve been there for four months, they had to have gotten bored. Do you think they broke into any of the security deposit boxes to see if anything was left behind?

Last thoughts: They really went for it with this episode. I have plans to change a lot of it. Hopefully I can mesh the changes with the general plotline.

[showcub]

boyfriend!au minhyuk

it was your sister’s wedding day and you were one of her bridesmaids

but one week prior to the wedding day you had a huge HUUUGGGEEE huge argument with your parents 

you wanted to drop out of college because you just couldn’t take it anymore

plus, it wasn’t in your life plan at all to attend college 

you were forced by your parents because for them “only with education you will be respected by the society” like wHAT

because all of their rich top-notch friends with billions of money would look down on them for having an unsuccessful child

do what you want don’t let people tell you who you can be or who you can’t be no matter what your relations are like nobody has the right to decide your life choices

you were definitely not the studious type at all

like you’re just lucky you graduated high school with average result

it was a pretty big argument that you had not contacted your parents for almost a week.........

you were considering to bail on the wedding but you couldn’t leave your sister hanging just like that

like she already paid for the bridesmaids dress and all

also it was none of her fault and the last thing you wanted was to drag her into the big mess

your plan was to not make any eye contact with your parents and to hurriedly hide if you bump into them

but when you were watching your sister walking down the aisle with your dad he was already giving you the death stare

and you were really sorry for your sister because you ruined the whole mood

so at the after-party you were getting ready to leave but your mom immediately held your hand and brought you to somewhere (not-so) enclosed for a ‘private chat’

so long story short, both of you were already raising your voices and the ‘private chat’ turned into a very heated argument

and your mom were raising her hand to slap you but he was taken aback when somebody held her arm

it was a guy whom you never knew or met before but he said “i’m sorry ma’am, but i won’t allow you to hurt my woman like that”

and you were like wHAT THE HELL IS THIS RANDOM GUY TALKING ABOUT

and he held your arm and said “babe, let’s go”

so he dragged you out of the room and left your mom dumbfounded 

ok what the hell is going on

you could’ve sworn that your face was just as dumbfounded as your mom

first this random guy just claimed you to be his WOMAN and now he’s holding your hand ??///????

but you were willing to leave with this random guy rather than continue arguing with your mom and turn the already big mess into a horribly bIGGER MESS

so he brought you to the parking lot and he let go of your arm

and you were like “ok first of all who are you and second of all who are you and third of all who are you”

“minhyuk”

so you’re like ok..................but minhyuk who

and he’s like minhyuk who just saved your ass 

you were glaring at him like do you think it’s funny????!!!!11!!!

so he’s like staring at you too and suddenly he winked and you were like..................wtf........this guy is seriously creeping you out....................

you were like planning to just leave him there then suddenly he said “if you think i was winking at you, you deadass wrong. just the way i normally blink”

and you’re like ok.......this guy........is definitely.........one of a kind..............also....a weiRDO

he explained to you that he was actually in the same room sitting at the corner but neither you nor your mom noticed him

he was also a friend of the groom but he got bored so he was waiting for his other friend there

so you’re just like and shrugging it off and ok............then it suddenly hit you

your mom would probably be telling everyone you have a boyfriend now

not that you never had a boyfriend but all of the relationships before never work out

then you’re like hitting him on the chest like WHY DID YOU CLAIM ME AS YOURS??? IN FRONT OF MY MOM????/ LIKE TF????/?///?/

he’s like i don’t know!! my reflexes are really bad 

he apologised and you’re like that’s ok i already have a bigger problem now

then he took a step closer to you and like “do you want to talk about it?”

and you’re like nooooooooo but tears already swelling up in your eyes

and in just a matter of time you already breaking down RIGHT. THERE. IN. FRONT. OF. A. GUY. YOU. BARELY. KNOW.

so he’s like “come on, let’s ditch this party and get some fries and coke to talk it over”

you hurriedly took your stuff and got in the car with minhyuk

and he brought you over to a park and you cry over it and he constantly gave you pats and rubs on the back

he reassures you that it’s all gonna be fine

at this point your make up is ruined and you’re crying your eyes out to the point where you get hiccups

then he’s like “let me take you home” but you’re like “no i want to scream”

so he’s like ok scream

so you screamed your heart out and he was just smiling at you sheepishly like what have i gotten myself into

so that night he took you home and he gave you his number just in case “you need a shoulder to cry on”

but a few days passed and you didn’t contact minhyuk nor your parents at all and you kind of have gotten over you never get to drop out of college

and suddenly you mother called you and said “y/n, i’ve changed my mind. come over so we can talk about it”

and you’re like if silent treatment was all it needed you would’ve done that a long time ago

so you came home and guess who’s also there

MINHYUK!!??

then your mom like “your boyfriend explained everything to me and i believe you’re mature enough to make your life decisions”

the he’s smiling at you and winking but this time it’s a real wink 

then you take him out of the house and like tELL ME YOU DIDN’T

and he’s like oohh, i just did

but you’re like speechless and just thank.....you.......i guess............

and he’s just like you’re welcome and patted your head but then you remember that he introduced himself to your mother as your ’’’’’’’’’boyfriend’’’’’’’’’’’’’ and you’re like minhyuk yOU GOTTA MAKE THINGS RIGHT

and he’s like ok sure be my girlfriend

and you’re like “stop giving me heart attacks”

and he’s like “what???? i’m making things right”

“the moment i saw the tears i just know i want to protect you”

then he gave you a quick, soft peck on the lips which left you wanting for more..........................

so you wrap your hand around his neck and brought his head closer to yours and kissed him

and he’s like “i’m gonna take that as a yes”

the thing about minhyuk is your parents love him so much like he talks too much and he is definitely a sweet talker who keeps complimenting your mother

like no wonder he successfully talked her out to let you make your own decision

even if it is a formal dinner of your parents’ business your mom always invites him

and let him host the dinner.............which led to a wild party afterwards

his ideal date is to bring you along with him to volunteer

there was one time where you guys went to the zoo and at every animal he meets, he meows at them

“look, y/n! a horse! meow!!!!”

he’s never afraid of talking about his future plans

like there was one time he’s asking you how many children you want

and when you don’t answer “i want as many as possible like can you imagine how cute mini minhyuk and y/n would be?????????”

whenver you guys fight it would always come down to him following you around the house to annoy you

and he’s like “i want to talk about it” and you’re like “i thought we’ve gotten over it” and he’s like “never!!! unless you’re buying me ice cream”

“there’s nothing ice cream can’t fix, and that includes our relationship!!!”

he’s very bubbly and cheerful that sometimes you wonder what his parents fed him when he was a baby 

hOL UPP HE STILL A BABY

you and him always have huge karaoke session which includes songs from all centuries and genres

but he never karaoke the normal way

he does impersonations of the real singers

he can never keep his mouth shut so whenever you guys take a scroll at the park he’s just like “is the flower prettier or am i prettier?” “y/n let’s buy a kite!!” “looookk! there’s a tree” 

and sometimes he joins the kids playing at the playground

but it just makes you fall for him more and more

like your friends all said that he’s a perfect match for you as in you’re hot-tempered and dark and all at the same time and minhyuk is just.....minhyuk (you know what i mean ;))

and you guys complete each other

he’s a pda kind of guy like he holds your hand, gives you pecks on the cheeks randomly at the public and he loves it when you cling onto his arm

the first time he said i love you to you, you guys were at a mall where he suddenly went missing and suddenly you can hear announcement through the speakers

“good evening ladies and gentleman and today you’re going to witness me confessing my love to my girl, my name is minhyuk and y/n, i love you!!!”

find more from this series: boyfriend!au shownu, boyfriend!au wonho, boyfriend!au kihyun, boyfriend!au hyungwon, boyfriend!au jooheon

boyfriend!au i.m coming up soon!